149: Ring Pop with Chris Lamberth | Soder Podcast | BONUS

There's a fire inside you, you can't ignore. Stand still, not a chance. You're a lifelong learner who's come this far. Now, we're here to help you keep going further. Capella University, what can't you do? Visit capella.edu to learn more. This is Matt Rogers from Las Culturistas with Matt Rogers and Bowen Yang. This is Bowen Yang from Las Culturistas with Matt Rogers and Bowen Yang. You know when people try a new food and suddenly it's like, okay, hold on, I got a new favorite food. That's the reaction a lot of people are having when they first try Kewpie mayo. Yeah, it's the one with the red cap and the little baby on the bottle. You've probably seen it at the grocery store. And this mayo is different. Most mayonnaise uses whole eggs. Kewpie only uses egg yolks, which gives it this rich umami flavor. It's smoother, deeper, almost buttery. Once people try it, they start putting it on everything. Egg sandwiches, fries, burgers. Chefs use it. Restaurants use it. People who really care about flavor use it. Put it on just about anything. Then you'll understand. Kewpie. The original. Japanese mayonnaise. I am on the road building this new hour this weekend. I am in Spokane, Washington at Spokane Comedy Club. I'm in Portland, Maine, September 10th through the 12th at Empire Comedy Club. The early shows are sold out, but we still have late shows with tickets available. Those are at DanSutter.com. And then if you're in Hartford, Connecticut, my birthplace, I will be there Thursday, September 17th, Friday, September 18th, and Saturday, September 19th. DanSutter.com. There are going to be a lot of fun shows. Also, just go to my website. All the dates are there through the end of the year. And check out PunchUp.Live. Got movie watch-alongs. You can also sign up for my mailing list so when I come to your city, you already know. And these little intros don't mean jack squat. Do you still hate Dan Snyder? As a Commander's fan? Yeah, because based on everything that's been going on with how Galvanized. Galvanized the city is, the whole area, or as we say in Maryland, the area. The area. Balmore, Maryland. Yeah. That mid, what is that, that mid-Atlantic? Mid-Atlantic. Yeah, you guys are similar to a Philly. Yeah, yeah. A Philly, like, yeah, you can't get in there. Yeah. It's a little, like, from where, like, Stavros is from to, like, an hour away. Okay. And I'm an hour south of where he grew up. So you clear the cloud? Yeah, but it's a little, like, I've kind of lost it a little bit, but it's, like, the vowel sounds, like, instead of party, we would say potty. Yeah. About to go to the potty at Dan's house. People losing their accents to me is crazy, because I grew up in Colorado, where everyone's like, hello, how are you doing? Yeah. And then I see people, Katie is from Framingham, Massachusetts. Yeah. And she does not have a Massachusetts accent. And then I saw an old video of her in her 20s, and she has an accent, absolutely has a Massachusetts accent. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's just a sound like Amy Poehler in one of those. Yeah, she's like, I'm going to go down, I'm at the end of the bar, having a drink. Yeah. And you're like, Jesus. So it's crazy to me that you, like, train your mouth not to, you know? Yeah, and then to her, in her defense, like, she's a broadcaster. Sure. And then I was a, I'm a theater guy. Yeah. And there's a, where you're from is kind of, they would call that standard American, like, standard American dialect. Yeah, broadcaster accent. Yeah, stage standard. Yeah. And then if there's the little, like, when Forty Winters have besieged thy brow. The old, the old time era. Yeah, so it's a little different. As a theater guy, when Timothee Chalamet talks all that shit about, it was, but what was it about? The ballet? Ballet and opera. And opera. But that's like, those are your siblings. He kind of fucked up. His mom, his mom, he's from that. His mom is a ballet dancer. I think his sister was in. Oh, really? Yeah. Yeah. Like, so it was kind of weird that he said that. But like. So he's just trying to get into a fight with his family. Maybe. And he ended up catching fucking everyone else by surprise. Yeah. Because they were saying, McConaughey was like, no, no, don't do it. No. He was trying to stop them. Oh, yeah. He's like, hi, buddy. No, I don't think you should go down there. Yeah. He's like, I'll say fuck the ballet. What are they going to do? Kick me in the head? Yeah. It's, it's one of those things. Like, I'm, I'm taking my girlfriend to the ballet in a couple of weeks. Yeah. Down in, listen, in J-PAC. Yeah. For her birthday. It's a great date activity. Yeah. If you can get, theater is something you appreciate when you get older. Or for young kids, if you're a theater kid. I was a theater nerd. I mean, like, I love standup. Sure. And like, when I was a kid, you know, and Martin Lawrence was a god to me. Yeah. Because he's from PG County. Oh, yeah. Where I'm from. And like, he. So you had one of the guys. Yeah. From your neighborhood. So it was like, I mean, he was much older than me. Sure. You know, but like, I remember my late great dad taking me to see, to see U.S. So crazy in 94. So I would have been like 13, 14. Taking me to that. His, his album talking shit. Listening to it all the time. Driving around Paul Mooney. Deaf comedy jam. Watching that like, like cartoons. You know, like, so. That's. I completely. Yeah. I think a problem with the internet is that boys at 13 or 14 now are seeing Manosphere guys. Yeah. Who. When you're older, you realize you're just either broken or insecure. They're never like happy. Yeah. They're not like, you know what I do? I go home and I enjoy myself. They're like every moment I'm making wealth. Every moment. Yeah. I'm making sure that I take something fundamental and I turn it into gold and go, brother, relax. Yeah. I was like, when I was a kid, my, my first off the books job was cutting grass. Like I cut grass. My dad would edge, edge up the lawn and then I take that money and you put it into a baseball and football cards, like all, all the, all that. I mean, yeah, but basically my point was that at 13 or 14, it was great that our Manosphere was standup comedians because it was funny and they were like smart. So you're like, like the way that, uh, what's, what breaks my heart is the way that young guys right now are influenced by dipshits. They don't have like good comedy. They don't. Well, they have like, that's why I love seeing Shane have like my little cousin was like, do you know Shane Gillison? Yeah. And you're like, yeah, buddy. Cause you're like, you feed that. Tell your friends to go watch standup, watch, watch something funny. It's a weird thing. Cause it's an, it's not weird, but it's interesting. Cause I think back to being such a fan of Martin Lawrence and seeing that he was like a, a rock star, but then he also had that vulnerability where he would say, Oh, I fucked up here with that, that bit that he had crazy deranged and, uh, you so crazy where he's like, Oh, I'm kind of flawed. I'm not perfect. And I'm this way I'm, you know, vulnerability. Well, also there was this ownership of kind of his actions, even in the sentence where he's like, it's my life. I'm going to talk about the way I see it. And you're like, that is such a good thesis statement for Martin Lawrence, where he's just like, this is how I experienced it. And I'm realizing I'm wrong. Yeah. There's what's, what's interesting is, is there was like, um, a lot of accountability in that kind of standup where you're like either like, uh, what I loved about killing him softly is every joke. There's like this accountability for somebody, whether it's like, um, you know, getting high and asking the cops for directions and he's like, you're on third street, there's all this like different stuff where w you know, when the Sesame street starts, because Chappelle's showing his nephew funny things on television and he runs into Pepe Le Pew and that's why it's so funny. Cause he goes, now I'm seeing it. And I'm like, what kind of fucking rapist is this guy? And you're like, it's so perfect because there is this, like this humanity in it. And it isn't like. Easy like this side does this and they're all wrong about this. It's like this like humanity thing of like, oh shit that I loved. Turns out I might've been wrong about a lot of it. And I think that's a great lesson for teenagers to learn when you're like, you know, it does, you don't have to drunk drive accident to have that moment. You just watch standup comedy and be like, oh, accountability. Maybe I can learn. Yeah. And I, and I think when you're from our generation, I think I'm a couple years older than you, like, but it's, it's like. You, you, you just kind of think about, um, God, where was I going with that? Uh, it doesn't even, I don't even know, but we're talking about accountability. It's like you show like the human, the fuck out of this, I was like, oh, no, no. He's so good about you. You think about like your, it's a human experience and like, what I appreciate about your standup is about it's autobiographical, it's not all of it, but it does lend itself to feeling, a little bit of it, a little bit of it. A little gay, it feels a little one man showy sometimes. I think our, but I don't care about that, but it's a taste thing for me. For sure. It's a taste thing. Absolutely. I completely agree with that. It's not funny. It's funny, no matter what it is. But for me, it's just like, oh, I kind of have an idea of who Dan is as a person. Yeah. I love that about, you know, it's just like after you leave stage, it's like, oh, I kind of understand who that dude is. Yeah. I remember one of the first times ever being in a social situation with Bill Burr and I'm a huge fan. Yeah. I was watching him and I was just kind of like, oh yeah, you've informed me that this is how you are. Yeah. Yeah. You know, I watched it. He's a nice dude. Yeah. But I watched a guy that we both knew back in the day go up to him and he was a little drunk and he, and like Bill Burr, it was about to be the Celtics Lakers finals and he was a Lakers fan and he went up and he was like, my Lakers are going to beat your Celtics. And Bill Burr was like, who the fuck are you? And you're like, you had no previous information that was going to be his reaction. I was in a situation like that with him. in one time where we were just talking about normal stuff. - Sure. in the pocket but not like it was just like oh i think this guy was who's your favorite blah blah blah and then another guy came in and just kind of ruined it and made him a little upset and then and then when i was leaving the event i was just like good to see you burr he's like hey man sorry about that uh it's really funny i really hold out there yeah you really do like hanging out with professional fighters there has to be that thing where you're like hey you're getting them too riled up like a guy like bill burr you're like don't get him or like someone comes over with like pacquiao and they're like throwing him he's like hey he's gonna start throwing punches he might fuck you up yeah he might break your face he might slip into fight mode and just fucking like i'd do this for real yeah that's what i mean like yeah you're trying to bust balls with bill burr you might say something that really hurts your feelings where you go i didn't even think about it like that yeah that's the way you eat celery it fucking bugs me and they're like oh god well now i can't eat celery ever again yeah um yeah i mean i don't know man i think the internet needs to be shut down shut off i think we need to take the giant uh switch just for like a year touch some grass everyone needs to chill out if not i mean i think the easiest fix is outlawing social media for kids or just in general everybody everybody i could see that i don't think humans are built for it i think we're too jealous i think we're too insecure yeah too angry i think we're too fucking bored that it's like uh you know yannis papas used to have this incredible bit about boredom in like how important it was just to like sit there because then you would think of things yeah and i'm like man i think about that bit once every three months where i'm just like more boredom in this world and we'd just be a lot more shit would be working better if people were like oh yeah i gotta fucking do that instead because i do and i'm just as guilty as anybody i'll catch myself scrolling where i'm like what was i doing what was i thinking about i like what's going on i'll like look and i'll be like oh i have like uh 15 minutes until i have to leave and then there's a part of me it's like oh i get to scroll and then i start scrolling and i look up it's 20 minutes later and i'm mad i'm like mad about shit time yeah oh my god i'm reading articles that by the way check one source most of the time they're not even real yeah that's what's crazy well like some random people think about zendaya and yeah the drama or the new spider-man trailer spider-man and you're just like oh fuck i'm in here in the comment section watching people battle it out and it's doing nothing for me sometimes it's fun though i'm not gonna act like i'm above it because like my algorithm is what's what's popping up now on your algorithm god sneakers video games celebrity gossip that's fun i'm getting a chinese lady that sings okay i don't know if you've seen her no is it like a like a voice thing like where this lady is good or no dude i'm gonna tell you right now this is exactly what i want out of the internet okay it's a lady in china just got a fucking iphone and just saying it just out here i'll show it to you she make you cry no dude it's no not cry like i got some of those i got some of those no this is just straight like oh she's just saying okay it's just a bop dude she's just got it all right this lady just she just knows what she's doing let me play her for it what kind of stuff is she singing this is matt rogers from las culturistas with matt rogers and bowen yang this is bowen yang from las culturistas with matt rogers and bowen yang you know when people try a new food and suddenly it's like okay hold on i got a new favorite food that's the reaction a lot of people are having when they first try kewpie mayo yeah it's the one with the red cap and the little baby on the bottle you've probably seen it at the grocery store and this mayo is different most mayonnaise uses whole eggs kewpie only uses egg yolks which gives it this rich umami flavor it's smoother deeper almost buttery once people try it they start putting it on everything egg sandwiches fries burgers chefs use it restaurants use it people who really care about flavor use it put it on just about anything then you'll understand kewpie the original japanese mayonnaise this is ashley kinetti from the ben and ashley i almost famous podcast ben i've been reflecting a lot lately on how many big life moments our listeners have experienced with us yeah it's pretty wild they've watched us go from dating shows to engagements weddings babies buying homes every stage comes with new decisions the milestones are the fun part but the planning is where things get real that's why clarna stands out clarna gives people smarter tools to help manage everyday money with flexible ways to pay cash back that builds automatically everything in one place and support that makes everyday decisions feel less overwhelming since life moves so fast the right tools can help you feel more confident download the clarna app today or visit clarna.com to learn more california resident loans made or arranged pursuant to a california finance law license and mls number one three five three one nine zero clarna balance account required to be eligible for cash back points limitations terms and conditions apply huh i'll run it right back do you think i won't write i'll run it right back on it somebody's got to chop that up oh yeah i mean people do like did you ever see that guy that on tiktok would sing where he'd be like today i look like the prince of the jungle you ever see him like 40 50 60 70 haha yeah do you know what i'm talking about today i look like a princess of the jungle i will rescue you the princess lost in the forest yeah no i i just thought you're gonna show me like some asian dude or somebody in the philippines that sings like on some like he's singing the shit out of d'angelo or something all right now that is what i do have is uh in my algorithm is filipinos doing creed okay because there's guys in there fuck i wish i could find it i might have it saved i don't know i don't know i don't know i but there's one where he's just uh i mean they fucking can nail creed i guarantee i have one of these saved do you watch that does that come up on your feed is like because i want i mute anything that i'm like this is really bumming me out yeah i'm kind of like uh i used to do radio in college and so i like a good like r&b yeah like a mellow like a jam like a mid-tempo jam yeah so you're trying to watch like like everything that i have right now is just stuff that makes me go like yeah so it feeds me stuff so i just make a playlist on apple music and just like oh i like if i like it i'll just dump it in there and then while i'm driving or something i'll do a shuffle yeah that's uh that's the way to go because i all my shit i'm looking at that i have saved is either like old nor mcdonald clips okay but i'm trying to find also there's one where there's uh people trying to learn uh mandarin in reverse we're like trying to say hippopotamus oh shit hippopotamus but then there's like other it's like the other way where you're like where people will probably edit that part out yeah that's but uh i get i get fed like oh these girls these twins i've seen them before lip-syncing videos it's all all i want on my feed is just like shit that i'm like it's funny yeah it's cool chill recipes yes i'll send stuff to my girlfriend we should make this yeah yeah i there and there's people that like you'll start to follow that there's like a um huge wrestling fan there's a father-daughter duo and she's deaf and he signs he does asl and then she's like really big into wrestling and he took her to wrestlemania and she's really cool you like see her and she like loves it and that's the kind of shit i showed katie and i was like this is like the heartwarming shit that the internet can provide yeah and then it's like you can see your algorithm if you're having a bad month trickling this shit and you're like why am i why is this coming up what the fuck's going on yeah did you watch the hulk doc yet i uh i watched the first episode so you're on three yeah i just finished three it's four yeah i'll get there by the end of the weekend yeah i because i've only watched episode one i don't have enough sample sizing to know if it's a puff piece or not because i think it's gonna be but also because it's produced by the wwe so they don't really want to hit the shit but the thing one of the whole kogan documentary was brett hart talking shit yeah where he was just like dude all he could do is a bear hug all he could do is a bear hug he wasn't shit and then he's like his promo is 10 out of 10 and so he was giving him compliments so i that again i only watched episode one and that's that's the rise so it's hard not for it to look like a puff piece when they're doing the ascension creating the character hulkamania 3 you know wrestlemania 3 hulkamania running wild to see what it looks like by episode three yeah i won't i won't spoil it as a black guy how do you feel about watching that well it's a part of the 80s and when i was a kid uh i did watch i liked him were you a hulkamaniac when you were a kid or the ultimate warrior kid i like hulk i mean i remember those is that the galoob one no galoob was wcw the little rubber ones which ones were the big j this is jl this is that okay they're called like j what are they called i had the wrestling fans at home yeah yeah the galoob were the were um the size of the hasbro okay but they were rubber and they were all wcw i really know my wrestling figures because there was some i'm pretty lame no i have i i can blame greg stone for the shout out shout out to greg stone for having for getting me addicted in the action figures great it's very fun yeah he's addicted and then i got transformers and those are even more that's what i uh but wrestling for me for it was either x-men but it peaked for me with hasbro w wwf okay that was like probably my main shit that i was like yeah that was some shit that if you ran it bumped into 10 year old me i could talk about hasbro wwf figures for like seven hours okay i can be like there was a series where there was an owen hart was he was supposed to come out as a high energy owen hart was he supposed to come out as uh what was it like for you because i don't know if anybody from my generation is if i've ever talked about this on a podcast really what was it like for you going to toys r us as a kid dopamine hit it's the reason i'm an alcoholic okay yeah the only only feeling that comes close to walking into a toys r us as an adult is going into a bar to get blackout drunk oh you wouldn't say going into a comedy club or a theater to rock out no no no fuck that toys r us to me was like i need that dopamine hit i need i need a big one of it dude i mean toys r us see i i was the you know i'm a child of divorce and my dad used action figures as currency okay so i had a christmas where he gave me a hundred toys r us bucks oh shit damn near made me shit come he had my balls drop he had my balls drop that day dude it was crazy he was like we were we were visiting my great uncle in like um orange county okay so my mom and my my grandma my dad came down from the bay area i met him in orange county and my dad was like it was christmas and he's just a shitty dad so he didn't buy me christmas gifts but he had cash and he was like i got you a hundred toys which how do you give me a hundred dollars and i get to pick yeah versus what you gave me at seven or eight years old that's not a difference to me that's like this is unbelievable you know what i dropped 40 of the 60 dollars on or 60 of the hundred on starting lineups i love those dude i bought so many starting lineups i bought a barry sanders lions okay joe montana i had a fucking lawrence taylor i had just like unbelievable because to me they were sports action figures of course they were so i was like and the helmet came off and on and they're like and my dad was like don't open though those will be worth money as he's saying i got the deon sanders falcon one now yeah i loved it so like that's the closest i've ever felt is doing drugs maybe getting pussy is as close to toys r us like when you know where you go like oh fuck i'm about to get it to pussy you're like this feels like toys r us i feel bad for i'm gonna fuck that giraffe yeah because you just go to target a walmart it's so sterile it's so sterile yeah that's such a good point yeah i have like pavlovian reaction if you live in aurora colorado by the aurora mall there is uh highway 225 in mississippi right mississippi's the cross street 225 there used to be that's where toys r us used to be on this corner and it's now a storage place and every time i'm driving to my mom's house from the airport on 225 i look hoping it's going to be a toys r us again and it's not it's still a storage unit place and you're like that was the place when i was driving by and i'd see those ah dude it'd make me want to do my chores yeah it would make me want to fucking get good grades yeah it would make me i would be like i'm trying to go to toys r us my stepdad would take me oh my god the the ceremony of it because you'd be in i would be in school and i i would be thinking about my going at the end of the day yes and as a i was not as big as i was then but like as a big kid of the store and you get the toy and your dad would be like you want to go to mcdonald's no yeah i just want to go play the game or whatever it was and the ceremony maybe you can remember this you're a gamer when you're a kid right yeah the ceremony of you go to this you go say it's nba live sure oh no no when we were kids bulls versus lakers bulls versus blazers nba live though too nba 95 so i was like 15 when i was in high school i was playing nba live in 95 okay yeah i was too yeah genesis or nintendo genesis yeah genesis nintendo yeah i went genesis then n64 yeah okay that was the big jump okay and then ps2 right yeah so i never fucked with playstation 1 oh i mean i did when i'd go to my friend's house yeah but i never had it i went genesis 64 and then i had uh two jobs in high school so i bought a ps2 my my first on the books job was was what used to be a six flags okay it was a great adventure but that's when i got my playstation my dad worked at sears so we got the discount so but see how much more listen billionaires that are draining all our money see what you can make fun commerce can be fun it doesn't feel lay on your bed and just click and then it shows up in your house that is cool yeah that is cool but the idea of you sitting in class being like i wouldn't get here's what moves i'm gonna make and i mean dude i that's how i spent my time i spent my time my allowance yeah me too my mom was always like if you want i'd call them guys if you want a guy yeah you got to save up do you remember the game when you get a game at toys r us you see like say it's like the nba live and it's the ticket you get the ticket yeah your mom pays for it and then they go in that little cubby yeah and you'd see him open it to me that was the first time i thought about robbing the place because you see him open the thing and you see all the games and it's like the opening of the vault where you're like everybody get the fuck down on the ground you don't know who i am you don't know what i'm capable put all the nba 95s in the fucking bag um the you know what it was and uh and older millennials and gen xers will remember this the sliding glass door the the automatic door you walk in and you get past the shopping carts and you're like get all the baby stuff out of the way yeah but i would hit that action figure aisle and it was like boom boom going through stuff knocking it over learning how to hook back on yeah all of it the entire dance of toys r us and the best part was when you thought they didn't have what you wanted and then you went down like and then you would just find the toy in the back and you're like you you were like afraid someone was gonna steal it from you did you ever hide toys yeah to come back yeah 100 100 wolverine series 2 of x-men i fucking climbed up and put them up in like a barbie section and shit because i knew like my stepdad did this really smart thing now here's my question did you ever fuck with kb toys yeah yeah kb was if you're a real action figurehead what you would do is you'd spend a majority of your money at toys r us but then you'd go to the poor mall shout out buckingham square you go to buckingham square and you'd go to the kbs and you'd be like oh they got a whole different because it was different companies now you know how capitalism works you know that like hasbro and and them had to deal with toys wrestle while gloob had to deal with kb yeah so you could buy the wcw guys i knew that and i recognized that i i recognized that pattern when i was a young kid i was like oh you can only buy wcw toys at uh kb and i remember i wanted there was a tag team called doom it was uh butch reed and ron simmons in wcw i tapped out around like nine this is matt rogers from las culturistas with matt rogers and bowen yang this is bowen yang from las culturistas with matt rogers and bowen yang you know when people try a new food and suddenly it's like okay hold on i got a new favorite food that's the reaction a lot of people are having when they first try kubi mayo yeah it's the one with the red cap and the little baby on the bottle you've probably seen it at the grocery store and this mayo is different most mayonnaise uses whole eggs kubi only uses egg yolks which gives it this rich umami flavor it's smoother deeper almost buttery once people try it they start putting it on everything egg sandwiches fries burgers chefs use it restaurants use it people who really care about flavor use it put it on just about anything then you'll understand kubi the original japanese mayonnaise this is ashley kenetti from the ben and ashley i almost famous podcast ben i've been reflecting a lot lately on how many big life moments our listeners have experienced with us yeah it's pretty wild they've watched us go from dating shows to engagements weddings babies buying homes every stage comes with new decisions the milestones are the fun part but the planning is where things get real that's why clarna stands out clarna gives people smarter tools to help manage everyday money with flexible ways to pay cash back that builds automatically everything in one place and support that makes everyday decisions feel less overwhelming since life moves so fast the right tools can help you feel more confident download the clarna app today or visit clarna.com to learn more california resident loans made or arranged pursuant to a california finance law license and mls number one three five three one nine zero cloud a balance account required to be eligible for cash back points limitations terms and conditions apply oh god i'm trying because when i was looking at that doc and and what was that wrestlemania i don't even remember but i was just like around 94. yeah i was 11. i was in into like like football basketball cards i mean great year more into like music yeah last year 49ers won the super bowl 94. yeah and i that you know what that is that's like you graduating because what happened was with me is i liked wrestling but wrestling matured with me perfectly where it became the attitude era because of ecw they started showing tits and ass and i was pubescent so i was like yeah oh this is a one-stop shop for me yeah i could still like wrestling and it's not gay i'm not gay no more i like trish stratus yeah i love i love i love lita lita lita lita oh my god i'm not gay no more that's how it felt with the attitude era here you're like dude i fucking showing like sable oh my god they're hot i mean i just it was awesome i think i was playing i was playing maybe stop playing sports because when high school came my dad he because around that time i switched junior high schools i switched schools and the big thing was like the theater really and like if you if you were in the drama club you got to go to bush gardens williamsburg that's pretty big and i'd never been we'd go to king's dominion wild world adventure world what used to be and i secretly i had a like a reverence of the theater or like wanted to do it but was afraid what got you into it bush gardens williamsburg you should go there and watch plays no so what got me in the theater well we used to go i went to uh school the catholic school in dc from like well from like preschool to sixth grade okay and then like we would go to plays go to smithsonian museums and dc does have that yeah better than anybody yeah so like you want to go see a museum like we're in denver and they're like here's a dinosaur there's still like art stuff there right and that is where it used to be or the denver performing art center is fucking incredible and my mom was a theater kid yeah so my mom was very big on like i'm gonna take you to shows starting in sixth grade yeah and that's around the time and we would do that stuff and i like that stuff and then i remember the bush gardens williamsburg the play was the king and i okay and i was kind of afraid to to audition to play anna's son which is the lead woman's son but i remember the audition and the audition you had to sing in front of everybody can you sing yeah and i i used to listen to like so my dad and i driving around the car boys and men cooley high harmony yeah i mean you can sing listen to the radio oh man that was some fun fucking r&b that was a fun so i don't know if you remember a lot of harmonizing do you remember uh do you remember this album up mtv unplugged like uh yeah so casey and jojo singing that cover and stevie wonders lately absolutely this is after jodeci broke up yeah you have casey and jojo doing their own thing yeah fucking mammoth so yeah and they did it where like they did a great unplugged so i unplugged used to fucking rule yeah you could put on the bass and you could play the bass and you could play the bass and you could play the bass bands this is why everything's broken now right you i mean i guess tiny desk concert was the one that's what we that's one of that's what carried it yeah but it was so much better because it was like done well and lit well and shot well and fucking they like had performance allison chains uh unplugged is one of the greatest albums of all time so i've studied that song so lately they covered lately and so kate so it would be jojo would start off his lady yeah and jojo wore his hat baseball cap like straight forward sure and he gets to the part for casey to sing he's a casey singing yeah i turned my hat backwards and started singing like case kc is that's all the stuff i knew you got did you get the sitcom moment where everyone girls like the eighth grade girls that were super hot they were like oh my god you know the moment where the live audience goes on sitcoms yeah where it's like you're just fucking taking it up a notch i love that shit i love that shit i love that shit so that was like and i was like i was hooked and then the so i played like the kid did you get a girl from that not from that but like but i did get a girl like later on but like there it was like and then eighth grade was the sound of music okay so i don't know if you remember that show i played max like the the guy that got the von traps out of escape he got them away i helped them uh escape the germans so he was fun i had two songs and i was like it was like a handful of black kids in that school and and like the black parents were like they were looking at me like i was like fucking i don't know sydney portier or something and they they were they were impressed and my dad said i think my dad unintentionally like kind of sparked that flame because he was just like all the all the parents were like chris was really good the way you were singing and dancing and i had to do announcement at the end of the show we were awarding the director and everybody and and and i remember playing baseball like that same year and then i struck out i remember striking out and one one of the parents one of the black dads was just like hey man that's all right hollywood you you'll be all right because he knew he's like you're not a baseball player oh that's great it's like you're you're not there is that's a very like a important thing to have because when you have a skill like that you do go like i am valuable in a way that isn't uh stereotypical high school and i fought it yeah well so this is what i was gonna say is like good for you for even doing that because i remember i got in trouble a lot because i'm just you know i'm a loud mouth i interrupt on this podcast nothing's fucking changed still a great show i'm just i just fucking you're having you i think you're i think what your fans or listeners they they might say that but i think it's because you're engaged and you're excited i don't think it's of like any ill intent no i don't think it's ill intent yeah i think it's uh pure obliviousness and stupidity um but i used to always uh like get kicked out in school or whatever and then my guy like you know i almost failed eighth grade and had to repeat and like i remember they were like meeting with my mom and they were like he's very funny he should do theater like you should put him where he can like exercise his creative imagination and i remember being like yo that shit's gay as fuck get out of my face like i was like the kid that was like because i was insecure and i was so insecure that i was like no i'm fighting i'm like clawing tooth and nail yeah for my friend's respect i don't have a dad so i'm just like no no no no no i'm not gonna be mommy's little sissy fucking theater boy here's where i fucked up i would have got so much pussy that's i would have gotten so much pussy in high school that i would have been like yeah guys have fun getting cte for fucking three and seven record yeah i'm getting fucking no i didn't you call me fucking ring pop dude i would have been fucking all over that place oh my god dude if i was in the theater i would have been a fucking problem i could have been in fucking choir oh bo bo bo bo bo bo bo bo and i'm like no no no no she's gonna be her boyfriend tonight oh bo bo bo bo and instead i'm like playing outside linebacker just getting ran over every fucking plat every practice did you play against anybody that became famous a couple guys that went to the nfl i mean the most famous person that i played with was mike mcdaniel okay he was just my friend yeah he was just an undersized wide receiver who had hands and could run routes like a motherfucker so don't come at him and it's not the guy from the internet that everyone thinks where they're like mcdaniel looks clean and it's that white guy in the rain running routes i don't know if that comes across your feed where they're like no pads they're just like running routes in the rain and they're like yo dolphins mike mcdaniel running routes and you're like that's not him but he ran clean ass routes well i i know about that like i i uh you wouldn't appreciate this julian peterson yeah my cousin he's really his mom his mom and my mom grew up like grew up together julian peterson is one of the like i mean julian peterson is a fucking monster number 98 he taught me 49 he taught me how to play tecmo ball that's crazy very first tecmo ball him going to the seahawks was one of my biggest heartbreaks yeah because julian peterson was a 49er when they sucked what do you think about that i don't know i don't know i don't know i don't know i don't Michigan state he was like juco then and when he did i still got that shit under that layer of resin i know where the 49ers all went yeah that's my autism yeah i have 49ers autism dude julian peterson's the fucking man he's a monster he was a badass he was that you know what he was he was that like who too yeah played basketball at michigan state but he um he was that archetype of long and fast being an edge setter which like redefined the nfl it was javon curse right was the first one out of five years ago he was the first one out of five years ago he was the first and then he did it with the titans but then you watch julian peterson come out of michigan state ended up on the 49ers when we had those shadowed numbers and those dark gold pants dude for that 49ers fit was bring those back but i love that dude yeah so he was your so did you play football i did as a kid uh but like i kind of got burnt out my dad wanted it more than i did it'll burn out any kid and i think and i think uh my dad to his credit you know when you're when you're a kid you think your parents are superheroes and then when you get older you're just like oh that was just a guy it's well that's yeah that's trying to figure shit out you know what's funny is that's how the hogan doc feels yeah you go oh i remember that moment of thinking you're a superhero and now i'm watching you and i'm like oh you're like an old guy with yeah yeah but then but then when you realize oh because he was just a guy he was my dad was pretty old and i'm like oh you're like an old guy with yeah yeah but then but he was pretty fucking remarkable great so i i missed i miss him every day yeah but he but uh But he would say, it's kind of like a sitcom dad in a lot of ways. He would say, yeah, maybe I did push you a little bit too hard. Yeah, because he was like, I kind of wanted it. Well, you were a bigger dude. Yeah. You have a dad there that wants you to play football. Those are two big things. So I was a big kid, and I was in fifth or sixth grade playing against eighth graders on my team. And there was one kid that would always give me trouble. And we got into a fight in practice, and they tried to break it up. And my dad was like, no, no, let him go. Yeah, let him get that dog. And I whooped his ass. That's great. But my dad was like, no, no, no. Yeah. I mean, I think it is. You know what's funny is I was the inverse of your dad. I didn't have a dad, and I wanted it more than he did. So I'd be like, dad, I'm still playing football. He's like, all right, how do you have my number? And you're like, I don't know. I'm just trying real hard out here. I wear number 42. I'm not going to go. And he's like, OK, I'm going to go get drunk. But to your point about being insecure. You're about the theater stuff, and you would have been great at it. I think I would have had a very good fucking time, and I enjoy theater. And then I like to think. I can't sing, but. I'd like to think I would be like a marginal college athlete, maybe did it a couple years in pro. Have a dealership or something. Oh, dude. A kid that hates me. Dealership, you got to have a conference title. But to your point, we're of the age where, yeah, that was kind. People did consider that gay. And then maybe around 2003, when I was in grad school, I was in Chicago. Yeah. I was in grad school, and I was teaching during the summer at a theater camp. Around that time, High School Musical was out. Oh, I bet that shit blew it up. So it was just like everybody, it was OK. And now they're doing national theater competitions where gay, straight, everybody's doing it. Yeah, I mean, I do think it is one of those things where you're kind of so stupid as a kid that you just follow what the brightest light is. And I mean, I love football. I still love football a lot. But I knew I wasn't good the second I played freshman football. The second I played freshman football, I was like, damn. But the thing that I loved about it was the camaraderie. Yeah. And I can hit people really hard. So that was really fun. So I was getting hit really hard at home. So it was nice to hit people really hard on the football field. Yeah. Because, you know, at least you give it back a little. But, I mean, I'm just kidding. I wasn't getting hit. I was getting yelled at. I was getting verbally hit. I got hit. But I didn't get hit all the time. This is Matt Rogers. You know when people try a new food and suddenly it's like, okay, hold on. I got a new favorite food. Chefs use it. Restaurants use it. Kewpie, the original Japanese mayonnaise. This is Ashley Iaconetti from the Ben and Ashley I Almost Famous podcast. Ben, I've been reflecting a lot lately on how many big life moments our listeners have experienced with us. Yeah, it's pretty wild. They've watched us go from dating shows to engagements, weddings, babies, buying homes. Every stage comes with new decisions. The milestones are the fun part, but the planning is where things get real. That's why Klarna stands out. Klarna gives people smarter tools to help manage everyday money with flexible ways to pay, cash back that builds automatically, everything in one place, and support that makes everyday decisions feel less overwhelming. Since life moves so fast, the right tools can help you feel more confident. Download the Kewpie app. Download the Klarna app today or visit Klarna.com to learn more. California resident loans made or arranged pursuant to a California finance law license. NMLS number 1353190. Klarna balance account required to be eligible for cash back points. Limitations, terms, and conditions apply. But football to me was just something where it was like, that's where I knew I was funny. Yeah. Because I could make all those guys laugh. I was making like seniors laugh when I was a sophomore. And you're like, oh shit. I can do this. You're like, damn. Do you remember a bit? Like just like anything you said? You were like, fuck, I kind of. I remember I used to like, this is very random. But I used to, when I would lace my cleats, I would like make fun of techno. And I'd be like lacing up my cleats and I'd be like, or putting my pads in my pants. And I'd be like, I want to see some boobies, boobies. I want to see some boobies. I want to see some boobies, boobies. And like, they'd be like, yo, what the fuck? But then they would like start singing it along. And we'd be like, just like joking around. And I'd be like, boop, boop, boop, boop. And they'd be like, I was silly. Yeah, yeah. And they're like, meh, meh, meh. And they thought it was like, it was pure silliness. Sure. So you just have like a silly goose outbreak. Yeah. You know what I mean? But then like, I would blow cover too. And someone would pick up a. Soda! Yeah, someone would pick up a 15-yard gain on a fucking, on a slant. Remember I made you laugh in the locker room? I made my best friend laugh. He was like a three-year letter. He was like our captain starting left guard. Shout out, Garapay. Garapay is still one of my best friends. He was really good at football. He was like really, he was like, he was like the kind of kid that freshman year you show up and you go, we're not the same age. Yeah. He was like doing bench press with like 225 pounds when we were like 14. And I was like, I was struggling to hit the bar with like two 10s on it. I was like, yeah. They're built different, yeah. Me and McDaniel were so small working out. And Garapay's racking it. Dude, I remember he had a fucking 25, a 45 and a 35 on. And he's just fucking banging out a set. And I'm like. Like, there's zero chance we're both 14. Like, you're a fucking man. But he ended up becoming one of my best friends in our junior year. We were doing first team defense, first team offense scrimmage like at the end of practice. And I was playing outside linebacker. And he was like, he was like going to pull. So he was like, I'm going to come get you, Sauter. I'm coming to get you. And I had a cowboy collar. And I like bumped it up with my helmet. And I went, you sound like a big choo-choo train. Water boy. And he lost it. I just remember him losing it. Like him holding his three-point stance being like. Like, bringing it down to the ground. And I was like, you sound like a big choo-choo train. Because I was standing like Bobby Boucher. And it was just like. By the way, I think they probably got seven yards on the sweep that play to my side. I didn't fucking check for a crack block. But it was. God damn it, Sauter. That's all I heard. The moment that makes him laugh the hardest. I think this is. Fucking loves this moment. Was I was on kickoff team. You know, I didn't. I played. I was a special teamer. And wedge buster. And I like fucked up. And we, in our second week, like let a kickoff return for a touchdown. So he. So our coach, Coach Anderson, was like kicking people off the kickoff team. Yeah. And he kicked off most people. And I thought I survived. And then he gets to the end of the line. And he goes, Sauter, you're off. And I go, it's Sauter. Dude, to this day, my two of my best friends, Chad, and Danny, Chad, and Danny think that is one of the funniest moments in our high school football career. Get my name right. Yeah. I was like, but I was so defeated. Yeah. I went, it's Sauter. They're like, oh, shit. So I knew I was never going to be shit playing football, but I just loved all of it. I just loved playing it. I loved like, even though I sucked, I was like, dude. Let's do hitting drills. Let's play fucking 7v7. Yeah. And I also, at that time, like, I think when I could have gotten good at it, I got real into drugs. That's not good. And so that's like the other way you go, where you go, you know what's cooler than playing Will Linebacker? Getting stoned. But I was, because I had started smoking cigarettes when I was 12, and I would quit for football every year. Okay. I don't know why, but I would. I would. See, that's the thing. That stuff was a deterrent for me, because my dad used to drink. He stopped, and he stopped smoking. Oh, that's big. And then I had like, because I remember, I was like, dad, when did you, why did you stop drinking? And he was like, well, I was supposed to build a swing set for you, and I overslept, because I drank too much. And I was like, I probably wouldn't have stopped. Damn, your dad really did, your dad really did take shit account, like, damn. I'm like, I'm not even, I'm not even jealous you had a dad. I'm more jealous that he took accountability. I miss him, man. I'm like, very jealous that he was like, you know what? That was my bad. I'm like, whoa, whoa. You're telling me he didn't gaslight you for 14 years of your life, and then he fucking dies, and you're left with this? It's like that Louie bit, where he's like, you get one good parent. Yeah. He's like, one parent. My mom, I love my mom. Sure. Because I love her so much. I'm alive because of my mom. I was with her. I was with her this week. Like, I drove down to Maryland to take her to her doctor's appointment. You're a good son. She complains a lot. She's, then I took her to McDonald's, got her a fish sandwich and an ice cream. Cone. She loved it. Dude, I'll tell you right now, that fish, if you get a filet, I love it. Dude, I can't do it around with Katie, because she has too good of a sense of smell. But I'll fuck a filet. Double filet up? Not a double. I'll do a single with tartar sauce. But I'll do it as the second sandwich next to a Big Mac. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. Damn, I might have to get McDonald's. But it's like that parent that pushes you. Sure. And he's like, my dad used to say, he was like, you know, if you played football, girls will like you. And I was like, well, there's girls. I was in a drama club. you were right and he was like oh okay you're not gay all right all right yeah it's still from born in 1941 oh dude they were all by the way the boomers yeah they all did that check yeah they all did the gay check i don't want to care how fucking yeah progressive your parents are now they didn't vote for trump i don't give a fuck in the 90s they were doing it you still have to say you can't say that yeah yeah that teacher of yours is a you can't say that yeah i remember i remember my mom was like i was pretty young she just caught me looking at a lady's tits and she was like yeah you're fine she's like this kid yeah i don't know yeah uh yeah there is like a thing of man i'm gonna think about that toys r us thing for a while i really feel bad that kids don't have that it's so it's just not i mean it's so sterile it's so cold like even sometimes like looking in you know into a walmart and just like it's just yeah yeah you order them online like greg was my pusher because like he i was trying to greg by the way he's been on the road with me and he's been recently being like i have to reform i have two children but he's getting them into transform tell him i said hello i will because i because he's tomorrow he's done my show a couple times and like he because i was like oh they would be cool to get a black panther action figure sure when the civil war came out sure and i could not find one and then i remember one time getting a text from him at like six in the morning and he was like it's right here on this link from the hasbro site and i got it and i was like that was your plug yeah and then ever since then it's been like did that give you a little toys r us nostalgia a little bit like getting it because that's the high now when they drop it's just like sneakers or anything it's just like that is how buying is where it's like it's unaffordable and then you can't afford it then it is and you're like drug yeah i love the drug well that's what's like what's awesome i think about um kind of to echo what we were talking about about how i was so insecure with uh like the theater stuff yeah when i moved to new york and started doing stand up that was when i noticed that a lot of guys loved wrestling played with action figures late in their life yeah had a lot of similarities where i was like oh so i can just be that and they're like yeah and that's why my bookcase because there's people that come in here and they're like was this your bookcase or whatever you go it's probably a pretty accurate portrayal and also a lot of this is from fans so it's to me like the coolest shit in the world you told me i would have had a job where the makers of these new like hasbro style toys i did a voiceover thing for them and they sent me a box i told katie they sent me a box of action figures and i was like i gotta find kids to give them to yeah but it was like 10 year old me was blown away yeah like well you've made it yeah i'm not fucking front page of the hollywood reporter who gives a fuck i'm getting a box of fucking legion of doom and steiner brothers like go check out matt classics this isn't even a plug but they do like yeah nerd closet they do like there's like a bunch of guys that make cool shit yeah i like all that stuff i mean i i um i'm a big fan of the last of us uh i think that the games were incredible can i tell you something that's gonna make you very angry at me let's see i played last of us part one amazing got it was during the right before the pandemic stopped playing it for a little bit during the pandemic completely forgot where i was in the game and i was like oh my god i'm gonna be like oh my god i'm gonna be like oh my god in the game i was swimming looking for something completely forgot the controls sure restarted it played it loved it yeah part two came out got halfway got to part two of part two like the middle when you're in seattle yes stopped playing forgot the controls i'm gonna have to run it back i haven't finished it well didn't katie finish it didn't she got it katie got it way before me more of a gamer than you or no depends on which game because i'll go hard on a game and then get me to do it okay she got me into god of war she got me into last of us i got her into ghost of tsushima i just finished that it's fantastic did you play the second one i want it i want to get it it's no well while you're riding the high of the first one play the second one don't put too much time in between them it's a very a little bit of a letdown ghost of yotei was because she's got more shit like she's got a cooler stuff you got a wolf you got cooler weapons yeah uh you start with all your shit i found ghost of tsushima to be a much better game okay front to back like greater story greater highlight i liked ghost of yotei yeah felt too much like um too much of like a quick have you ever played the game sifu that's hard yeah dude that's my shit you beat it you want beat it brother i just fucking stay in it damn i i fucking uh i've beat it on on my system i've beat it on my steam deck i've unlocked most of the arenas we gotta talk about that steam deck it's fantastic okay if you travel and you play video games owning a steam deck is necessary he's got one okay they are just like uh you can get them modded my mod crashed so my buddy joe who uh who works at a comedy club i won't say but he helps me mod my my steam deck and put on like sega i put on all sega super nintendo nintendo n64 playstation 1 and then a bunch of playstation 2 games i played like nba street volume 2 oh shit def jam uh vendetta fight for new york which i'm probably going to replay this weekend um but there is like games where you can just go back and be like oh i remember i loved that game let me in the emulator usually works pretty great steam deck is the shit but sifu is one of the best beat them up games of all time that stuff is tempting i mean it's like i think they're like you can find them refurbished for like 300 bucks i love them well i had when i was doing a play on broadway a couple years ago and i had a nintendo switch great and i had metroid dread great it was amazing but now it's like you can't use it anymore is it whack because like now the two is out and nothing nothing works that's what i mean it's all like it's all i grab steam deck what's great about it is because i've never been a pc gamer real gamers yeah and everyone knows that i'm a little old bitch i am too i mean there's nothing wrong with that this is the closest you'll get to being a pc gamer okay because it's got the tech of pc games so they can't really fuck with you on a lot of shit so you can like like the community is really big they'll like tell you how to download stuff it is i mean dude i played spider-man um the recent ones yeah one and two on what you think of two one of the best video games of all time why does everybody hate that shit they're fucking smoking i thought it was fun they're smoking rocks a dickhead because it's great wolverine's coming out this september yeah oh september insomniac did or not insomniac whoever did uh it was insomniac yeah they did it same studio oh yeah i want the bond see see i'm bond is gonna be third person right yeah that's what all the things i like earn the double oh you like earn the number in this one yeah i only do third person you're a third person i'm only a third person guy i can't do the like that new game that's supposed to be hot with them that's like the mickey mouse animation oh shit it's a shooter everybody's raving about it about it i haven't even seen that it's like all the i forget the name of it but people are going crazy over it yeah i was like ah the john wick is coming out and that's third person that looks great yeah i'm a third person by the way if john wick is even half of a good video game third person people keep asking me if i'm back i'm thinking i'm back for me it's like speaking of kb toys like the last memory of kb toys was 96 my dad dad bringing tomb raider home to me the very first yeah in playstation one dude playstation one boxy ass laura croft boxy ass laura croft and then that big ass dinosaur coming it was like the biggest tv we had in the house was like a 32 inch at the time and i was like oh shit it was amazing are they completely gone are like i last time i remember and i'll tell you what the only time in my life i've ever gotten political was when i found out that mitt romney owned the company idos that lick was a prominent american mall based toy retailer out of business february 2009 oh okay i thought you're talking about the company that yeah they liquidated them and i think it was like so but they had dude yeah that that game i mean kb toys was it was a shit that that brought me tomb raider that reboot in 2013 brought me back to gaming yeah it's interesting what games can can you back in after a while because before it's just sports right like i'm just a sport that was me up until college i played i mean i would play like bond or perfect dark on 64 but or like uh metal gear solid yeah playstation 2 got me a little bit but then ps4 and ps5 have just completely gone into full gaming yeah it's like adult very adult gaming because that college football game i still play it i'd like you're gonna leave here and i'm not joking when i say i'm gonna play umass versus university of washington in the playoffs i've ran a 30-year dynasty how good are you what level all american really yeah i don't play on heisman i suck but i do sliders on all american so i up the ai on all america i suck on varsity i played one season with colorado last year i had bought 26 for cheap oh yeah i was trying to 25 because 26 is the newest one that's i bought that for okay and it was kicking my ass oh i love it i don't know i just i'm finishing a 30-year dynasty jesus christ i think i have like 22 titles wow started at east carolina moved to minnesota moved moved to colorado moved to syracuse and then to umass amherst because katie i was like katie katie's in that room i was like how shitty is umass and she goes they suck and i went i'm taking the head coaching job and she's like let's fucking go we're fucking umass minute man i can't even sell out a game and i'm a national champion that's good to have a partner that's like that because yeah i i love my girlfriend but we're we're like nine ten months in as of this record okay so it's new so yeah so it's new but like i i downloaded that um cosmic marvel cosmic oh yeah that was fun sure the new he-man i want when that comes out oh there's a video it's a beat-em-up coming out next week i think it's 27th or something like that for all like you know like playstation you could download it you know uh yo master of the universe or something april 28th okay yeah for pc switch playstation xbox you yeah what the fuck dude so i want to play that i'm up and masters of the universe is coming out yeah i think that's why yeah it does look really good dude what a nostalgia trip i'm gonna go open toys r us chris lambert's special killing in obscurity is on youtube right now the link is down below click it he's fucking hilarious i've known him forever uh watch his special and enjoy it thanks for coming by thanks for having me man always a pleasure and um man let's go open that let's go we should man let's go into business yeah old school when the internet shuts down let's open it sounds good sounds like a plan you some people like working twice as hard just to stay right where they are and in ohio we really don't get it because to us owning a home in your 30s working in tech without the traffic and still being able to make it to your kids soccer game sounds pretty good in fact ohio is the second most affordable state to buy a home your move learn more at your move ohio.com every journey needs a guide let the center for professional education cpe be yours certificate programs to drive career change every professional journey is unique but no one succeeds alone at cpe we believe every career path deserves expert guidance launch a new career or advance in your current role with in-depth knowledge from one of our professional certificate programs check out our courses at professionaled.utexas.edu to learn more there's a fire inside you you can't ignore stand still not a chance you're a lifelong learner who's come this far now we're here to help you keep going further capella university what can't you do visit capella.edu to learn more