137: Riding Bikes with Mike McDaniel | Soder Podcast | EP 134

Hey everybody, I'm wearing my 49ers hat. Even though today's episode, my friend no longer coaches there. Sure, he's with the Chargers, but I can still love the 49ers. We're taping the special next week. I'm very excited. For those of you who have tickets, I'm very excited for the show. But then in July, I'm back on the road, writing a whole new hour, building it up. I'm very excited to do that. That's one of the fun parts of doing standup is just trying new stuff and hoping that it works. So check me out. I'm gonna be at the Comedy Vault in Batavia, Illinois, July 9th through the 11th. New York Comedy Club in Stanford, Connecticut, July 16th through the 18th. And then in Montreal, I'm doing Club Soda on July 25th. All these tickets are available at dansoder.com. And then the full list of clubs for the rest of the year is on this poster. Go to at dansoder on Instagram or go to dansoder.com and see where we're going. But I mean, we're talking about everywhere. Albany, Baltimore, Spokane. Portland, Hartford, Connecticut. All the big dogs. I'm very excited. I'm gonna be in Calgary, in Winnipeg. All these places coming to run and build a new hour. Dansoder.com for all those tickets. Thank you for watching the podcast. And now here are two friends from seventh grade as adults. ♪♪♪ Now let's start. First off, I love the fact, the mob, the mob glasses. Yes, dude. You always, is this from last night? Is this from the green room? Yeah. Finders keepers, bro. You grabbed the Cheez-Its from the green room? Dude, I'm gonna tell you there's. No, it was from your. Yeah. Your specific. From my dressing room. And I waited the allotted time, 60%. Of the show? To make sure that I wasn't gonna. Because I was, like, super self-conscious about messing with people's routines. Oh, with, like, the axe? Yeah, man. Business, bro. It's so funny you took this from the dressing room. Because there's certain things that, like, just don't leave you in adulthood. Well, I was gonna eat it last night, but I fumbled one from the other bag. Oh, backstage. I know what you're talking about. Because I double-bagged. Because you were too bagged up. I had one out, and I was, like, fully gonna go back-to-back, and I fumbled one. You dropped the Cheez-It, but that's not the sin. The sin was created on my part, because I accidentally stepped on it. And then you can't just pick up the Cheez-It, because now the Cheez-It is in a thousand pieces. Yeah, but I don't wanna place blame on you in that regard, because specifically, I don't wanna positively reinforce staring at the ground. That doesn't help you socially. Dude, I. You know what I mean? Yeah. Yeah. I've been trying to tell people about. You're always fighting the towers as it is. Yeah. You're the only. You're one of the only people that. Obviously, we've known each other since you moved to Aurora in seventh grade, but how much I used to apologize to my mom for making jokes. For, like, making jokes. Right. No, no, no. And it was all. Like, I'd be like, I'm sorry. Yeah. I apologize. No. You and our friend Byron. Yeah, but we. And we got to, like. I run. It's kind of weird as I reflect, but we were psychoanalyzing ourselves then. I think that's. And then in college. Yeah. And then in our 30s the entire time, and it was very interesting, because we caught it early enough where you would laugh at yourself, and we'd try to. It was like a tick. Like, I'd fight the urge. You'd be like, I apologize. Ah, dang it. There was one time. There was one time you were spending the night at my house. And it was, like, literally shock therapy, because I was like, I don't do that. And then, like, every time I was making a joke, I was like, I. Yeah. I'm sorry. I apologize. Yeah. I'm sorry. That's what I. I always think what was funny is I landed in L.A. on Sunday, and the first time since 98, 97, we rode bikes. Yeah. You know, probably. It was, like, since. Not. Probably pre-Britney Spears. Yes. Right. Honestly, I think we could call it the Britney Spears effect. Yeah. I think her coming out on the scene. Yep. We were done riding bikes and just straight jacking it. We had gone from. You know. Do you remember the game we used to play where we would take a tennis ball and throw it at cars driving by, and then we would try to. Allegedly. Allegedly. And we would try to act like we were stopping it with our hands. It's weird how there's, like. Everybody has their things that they could identify that'd be like, wow, I would hate meeting myself. It's not a long list, but, like, that's what, like. A couple things. Number one. Like, suburban tennis ball throwing and just driving, just. Like. Dude, if my. I'm telling you right now, if I was in a nice Nissan Altima driving. Bro. Driving to. What am I doing, man? Let's say I'm driving to Alabama. Let's say I'm driving to Albertsons, right? I'm driving to the grocery store. Yeah. And I'm driving by where he used to live. Yeah. And my shit gets hit with a tennis ball. I'm over that fence, and I'm trying to fight those kids. Yeah. Do you remember when we got chased? You know what, though? Maybe this. Maybe we're looking at it all wrong. Maybe we should interpret tennis balls hitting cars. Cars should say, you know what? That's a cry for help. Because these kids have no supervision, which, you know, like. I do not have that control of my anger. Of a tennis ball hitting my car and me being like, donk. Hey, those kids are going through something. No, but realistically. I would have tried to get over that fence. How did we. Why did we do that? Because we were. But we were spending 24, I mean, all waking hours, like, doing our own thing. Yeah. I think sooner than I would be comfortable allowing my daughter to do. Oh, 100%. Now that you're a parent, you're like, there's no way I would allow her at. 13 years old to go to Albertsons and turn off the automatic doors like you and I used to do. No, just like, go. Oh, yeah. Leave the house. Just go. You'd leave all day. All the things we would. I mean. We would, like, in middle school, like, summers in middle school, we would go from, like, spending the night at my house, and then we'd just ride our bikes to, like, someone else's house and hang out all day. It was a situation where if we were more attractive, we would be trafficked. Yes. God, if we were sexy, we would have been. We would have been snatched up. You know, like. But, dude, I. Talking about hating ourselves, if I were at a grocery store and a kid turned off the automatic door like we used to do, because I was our. I'm so proud of that. Me too. Yeah, me too. Do you remember? So we used to. No, because. And it was so bold, too, because. Have I told you this story? Yeah, but you were tall enough, though. You were like. I was like. You were a tall kid then. Yeah. So it was also, like, beyond our reach of, like, things that you could do. Well, we found out. We found out through another kid that. I don't know if this is still how it is. You can't quote me on this. Yeah, we don't know where the technology's at. It's obviously advanced. We're talking about late 90s. You could. There was a switch, like. Manual. A manual switch on the top right of an electronic. Of, like, the automatic door. Yeah, like one of those old metal ones that's, like, on a. Exactly. And you could flip it in any direction. Yeah, but it's a hard flip if you get it going. Yeah, it's stuck. So you'd flip it southwest. You'd knock it down southwest, and what it would do is it would open the automatic door, and then it would shut it, but then the sensor didn't work. So then what we would do is we would lock the automatic door, and then we'd go around to the side. No, then we would watch. We would just sit there and watch people. You have no idea the faith that people have in automatic doors. They just assume it's going to open. Dude, the one I distinctly. No, but it's always interesting. It's, like, way different vibes once they get their bearings, because, you know, it's like, what just happened? Yes, it's the confusion at first. Right, and then, all right, am I going to double down? Am I going to lose my mind and get pissed? Am I going to yell, like, automatically breathe out, manager, like Karen? Yes, I bet right now there's way more Karen energy of, like, how could you let this happen? Like, back in the day, motherfuckers were taking their bumps and then just either manually opening it and getting their grocery, because the grocery cart. It's all about the grocery cart would hit the door, and then it would hit them. The one that I felt bad about, that I distinctly remember, was where on the side was there was, like, I want to say a three- or four-year-old kid in the cart, and the cart hit, and the kid just went down. But, you know, like, those are the risks, you know, you take when you're playing that game, you know? It wasn't for the lighthearted. Yeah. There were risks. Parents could be called. Yeah, parents could be called. We got called. We were good at not getting captured. Yeah. By known, like. My mom and your mom had no idea the dirt we were doing. Nah. They did not know we were going to Albertsons to play kickball. Do you remember that? Yes. And then one time we kicked the ball, because we'd go into the middle of the aisle and play kickball. We'd, like, roll. You know those, like, you know those big things that are filled with bouncy balls? Yes. We'd grab a couple. And we would play kickball. And then a couple times you'd launch it and it'd go up into the side. do you remember that when the sign came out the sign for the aisles went like shit and we just ran but and i think this is why we both ended up drinking and having to quit that rush of breaking the sign and being like and also we were just habitual line steppers but we kind of looked at it like this we're not stealing anything exactly the bad kids steal stuff we're playing an instant game of kickball in your grocery store sure we're locking your door there's like so like you know like i mean you're welcome parents and and people um within the store you know we had a lot of fun we had a lot of fun in that albertsons which is now like maybe people didn't mess like maybe they gave us some grace because we really pressed press their patience maybe they gave us grace because they're like you know what um that a boy kids yeah way to overcome those yeah stand up to society yeah just because your fathers don't love you doesn't mean the world won't yeah but we would do fun stuff we wouldn't do bad stuff we would do prank phone calls and like yeah you know what i mean yeah that's what's always funny because i see the i see a lot of the guys that we used to hang out with in middle school that would do the bad stuff and then they're just like dudes now no we we played this to the same like we were playing the same game the entire time from the onset where it was like no no the game is not to get in trouble exactly now how far can we push how crazy can we get within the rule the there's it was not negotiable our fear was driving us like we weren't getting in trouble we weren't getting in trouble because we were afraid to get it yeah and we were quick enough and we did not want to get it we scouted the mid you know mid 40s a lot of our a lot of those guys we were friends with weren't scared to get in trouble so they do crazy shit yeah we were like we're not getting caught and then do you remember when you blew yourself up in eighth grade because i got cheated on by my girlfriend and you left that voicemail i always tell people that was the moment where i was like mike is ride or die i always have been yeah always have been but i'm not gonna lie to you i'm not gonna lie to you i'm not gonna lie to you i was in eighth grade in between eighth grade and freshman year you were chilling at my house and you were like i found out some information from a girl that we went to school with that the girl i was yeah you know lauren was like yo uh she was like hey dan's girlfriend cheated on him twice yeah and i was like that was our first experience that was crazy in the in that that uh you know the the heartbreak and all that and i was like i'm not gonna lie to you i'm not gonna lie to you yeah the because we weren't we got better with women but in middle school we were goofy no so girls liked us yeah but they didn't like we were ready to have a girl yeah we're children ready to have a girlfriend i'm still playing with that like publicly was dealing you know like so like i had to interject and i know i know kids now grow up fast but we're we were in eighth grade ninth grade we found out that there had been some some fingering going on which is huge that's huge that i mean that is adult version of sex it's like that's eighth grade version of like i can't confirm nor deny anything above diddling that's it but i was i don't know she got diddled we found out i'm heartbroken mike ride or die the girl i was dating's house this is during the day it's summer in between eighth grade and this is not my style this is not his style this is why i'm saying i think it was the point yeah he set himself on fire because we were all i think i was distracted you i think i tried to do something crazy enough that you'd be like dude it's okay but this is i'll worry about you now and i'm not going to give names out i would never dox anybody but he called the girl i was dating we'll call her t and he was like it was uh answering last name rex t-rex tiny arms yeah thick legs yeah thick ass terrible at volleyball no range terrible pure carnivore uh only loved me uh terrible to have small poodles around she could shoot eat them so he this is like and i understand we have young listeners the answering machine was a big deal because the answering machine was the whole family heard it if you were if you got home and someone had missed a call no matter your place in the family you could listen to the answering machine it wasn't your personal voice messages it wasn't a text it wasn't a thing that went just to you this motherfucker speaker mode speaker mode calls i was standing next to him while i did it calls this girl's house perm speaker dude and you go you go hi you don't know me but your daughter frank isn't supposed to have a boyfriend her parents were very catholic i was oh yeah that was that was part of the yep and he's like yeah he went he went not only does she have a boyfriend but she cheated on her boyfriend with two other boys who put their fingers in her vagina that was the thing that he stressed and again we're eighth grade boys at this point but he goes dude i remember you being on my at&t corner cordless gray cordless going fingers in her vagina and honestly it helped it made me feel so good he threw such a nuke on that answering machine but by the way this is how fucking foolish i was yeah that happened and we just went and rode bikes we just went and rode bikes i think we rode up to your house might have gotten a joke cola or two and ridden to your house dude i came home yeah and my mom was like what the fuck did you do my mom went nuclear on and my mom could blow up what's up trish i know you're watching um she was like what the fuck did you and mike do you called redacted's house she was like mr redacted called me today where i should have known there's something fishy with the name like redacted like redacted i was i was preparing to get married and i go mr redacted that sounds good i'll take her name the vision on your vision board i mean i'm putting on a i'm putting on a fucking veil i'm mr redacted but uh dude my mom was like what the fuck he's he star six seven did or he star six nine did got our number she's like he blocked he blocked our phone number i was grounded for the i think like i want to say the rest of the summer i was in deep trouble and she's like and i just called mike and got off the phone with donna and he's in trouble too did you get in trouble nah damn i knew it i was like nah dude don is gonna see why he did it and respect it yeah but but it was like damn my mom really i knew i was but it was like because i was motivated to do i got cheated on and grounded no no but i was just because i was motivated at you know taking my world to new heights yeah i went like you brought the fight but it was like for us yeah and i figured it's cost of doing business listen dude and like honestly i would i would do i did those you know i did those two months of being grounded on my head i did a nickel for the cause i did my dime and i got the fuck out no and it and it made my life more inconvenient you know i think we started like um violating the the grounding like once you got a good weekend yeah if i remember correctly yeah i started i think i got i think i got a reduced sentence yeah after a little bit because i think my mom understood my mom my mom's great with empathy and i think she understood i was very sad about what happened and that you were a good friend and she was like all right i think i can knock off no she was like i need to socialize this boy she caught me prank phone calling a lot she was honestly really cool about it and i think i probably would have been a lot harsher no no she now i remember this and trish this is cool because like i do remember vividly there being times that you would like you'd be all rambunctious and you would toe the line with your mom which was rare yeah but it's because you could feel that like you were on a comedic rhythm at the time yeah and if it was funny enough she let it go so but it was like it was cool because like if it wasn't funny enough i was in trouble oh you were i swear to god that's a hundred you apologized yeah dude i apologize i apologize you don't understand that's how him and byron my two best friends would make fun of me all seven days great i apologize i apologize i apologize yeah dude danny didn't finish your milk like something weird i mean something weird like that but but she wouldn't necessarily be she'd just be like very assertive but she would be like you have to drink the milk yeah or something happens you would prematurely rush to the i apologize we couldn't even find out where the where it was going you know yes right i would 100 lead with an apology not knowing what i did dude when i started going to therapy um my therapist was like can i watch your stand-up and i did a comedy central half hour and i had it on a dvd and i gave it to him and he watched it and then the next therapy session i go and he goes why do you apologize before all your jokes and i was like shut the fuck up and he's like you apologize before you make jokes yeah and i was like you don't understand seventh and eighth grade my friends would always go i apologize that was like the impression he goes you still do it it was like crazy to see that and it was in my late 20s but the early 30s the coolest thing in the world is like um um figuring new stuff out about yourself yeah and like and then being able to recognize it and not overcooking it minimizing it but then laughing at yourself when you're like wait a minute yeah those are three apology apologies yeah in 30 seconds middle school dudes are calling me out yeah adjust my behavior adjust it adjust and then readjust i mean i think that's like that's what's been crazy about watching you through your career make the proper adjustments you've been watching me from afar i bugged you oh i put a i put a i put a bug on you at a slumber party in eighth grade i was like i have you tracked like a bison that's better than i was in your house yeah i was in your house unannounced and oh dude remember sneaking out of your house yeah we used to get so good sorry donna if you're watching uh we used to get so good at sneaking out of your again again not getting caught yeah we used to get so good at sneaking out of your house again again not getting caught we never got caught for the whole night yeah but we applied our our our ambition our our thirst for life yeah and like we're like hey listen we can't be successful like um you know starting a little uh money making business or really doing anything productive but we can scheme our way into doing things that we shouldn't do that we'd get in trouble for but we won't get caught for scheming dude we're all about middle school's all about scheming it's all about what schemes can you get away with and it was great i was all about schemes dude dude well it's kind of as you reflect on it what weirdos we are in middle school like dude just just be above board keep it real just keep it real yeah and you're not here to be fine but we would like dude we'd wait for your for your mom and stepdad you're not here to be fine but we would like dude we'd wait for your dad to go sleep and we'd sneak out and then just be outside we'd just we'd just be out there no way to contact by the way if something happened to us it would have looked like we were just straight up we spent a lot of time in the the pathways on the way to indian or uh right by indian ridge yeah elementary school but on the pathway by smoke to laredo and smoky hill yeah we were in the cuts in mission viejo yeah um uh dipping dodging um i mean so what's funny is last night at um at shane's show at the hollywood bowl which was so wild man like it was you're at such a good place no thanks and but you know it's funny being on the show like i could in one hand say i i couldn't can you believe this and the whole time i'm like dude i'm nostradamus i saw this coming because it's like pretty simple formula yeah passion and talent and just intentionality towards that over time yeah which i think is a thing that you and i share exactly the same thing which is what so what's funny is uh last night was the first night i had met christian mccaffrey in person right yeah like uh social media or whatever and he's good friends with shane yeah obviously he's a 49er fan you know you're like he oh he's more attractive in person i go well hello i actually put my glasses down and i went oh yeah yeah and there's there are transition lens lenses you just came in so it's like but he's a colorado legend but what's crazy is his brother you work with his brother max mccaffrey max mccaffrey you've known the mccaffreys since you were a ball boy yes i mean since we were 13 yeah 13 to 16 yeah you were there the night 90 were you there 96 through 99 yeah uh shout out those superbowls shout out post avalanche and coors field denver yes time period you were post you know right in that little pocket coors fields brand new yeah we i mean we were smart enough kids that we knew why two kids was fraudulent absolutely i remember what we were both at the same new year's eve party in 1999 we're at ann marie might have to block that yeah but that was in piney creek and we were all at the same party and everyone was like we all knew why 2k wasn't going to happen yeah i remember that i remember exactly where we were and i was like out back smoking a cigarette okay mad dog 2020s a lot of it i'll even i'll see your mad dog 2020 and i'll raise you drinking puckers with the dentist you guys used to drink a lot uh you guys used to drink um no because it was that was at the age that was like you needed you needed a sweetened alcohol well and just to have alcohol superseded whether or not that was a legit drink for a dude to have yes it was like if it had booze in it yeah no one gave a shit you're like damn you're drinking alcohol um it was also it was probably a sign of things to come that i enjoyed whiskey at 16. i was like no this is this is pretty rad what's this no i would i well we'd keel over and think it was like devil's blood yeah you're like i remember jagermeister i got really in the regular but what was crazy was uh meeting christian we talked about so much colorado high school football stuff yeah that was crazy as and he was like where did you and mike go to middle school and i was like laredo and he's like all my friends went to laredo and you're like it is that wasn't a very fun middle school because it was like all these neighborhoods around yeah all these different kids that went to that middle school and yeah it's like fun to be like dude that's crazy we were there 20 years before christ no it was well you didn't go there well because it was right on the line of like a 20-year distinction yeah of suburban sprawl yes so then it was like super modest middle class yeah and then and then like um mumsies yeah and are just some gated community shenandoah you were like right by where there was like a gated community where you're like oh you have to talk to a guy to go to your house versus like my house which was just in it was just out there yeah and these these people in these homes that they go to country clubs you're like yeah that was fucking wild and that's and that's but it was so such a unique melting pot that's what was you know it was the there was a lot of we knew kids that were poor and then there was like denver broncos players that lived not that like neil smith right remember how close you lived to you yeah you know what it does it it that's a that's a formula to have a lot of white people listen to rap yes who who now probably don't who now are grown up and don't it was like but also i also think you're looking at the late 90s where i think uh hip-hop and rap was in the suburbs like yeah everywhere because of the mtv yes because of how music got places yeah people were getting like it doesn't happen like that now now it's pockets you have like people that like shit and sometimes it'll cross over there it was like if we're at the taco bell parking lot waiting to find out where a party is people are listening to similar music why didn't we get arrested i talk that is wardering and it was for long periods of time but what's crazy is and you're you're queens when you're in high school did you go to just parking lots and wait to find out where parties is that's everywhere yeah it's like katie did it in massachusetts and it's like we were doing it in aurora you're just like sitting there being like who's got the house party that only happens with a ratio that's the white privilege screaming oh my god yeah like why a bunch of white kids like we're out the weird and no and we're not nervous and at all at all just a little too comfortable well then what i mean thanks to my mom my senior year pretty much we could just go to my house if we needed it to remember when joey owens threw up yeah that's huge yes i did not like that so mike mike got a sweet car oh i think i lost it didn't i yeah it was by the way in front of my house it was in front of my house so we used to embarrassing overreaction there so we used to by the way i know owens is watching this because they still text them all Diamond, I know he's loving it. Our buddy Joey used to go nuts. i remember exactly what hoodie he was wearing he was wearing a black mark echo with the red rhino on it and he was in the back seat you had a two-seat mustang you had a 1999 two door two door seat two door four seat yeah come on sorry no but he didn't acknowledge the back seats because he was on these at that point i couldn't do it i could not get that back seat but i remember and he has he has if i you have terrible like uh um flexibility in your hips guess guess who's been stretching his hips for about 20 years every morning really dude i really i genuinely do you have a song i go here go my hips straight now i know i'm stretching my hips but i've legitimately started stretching my hips it's important bro yeah dude i need to do it i'm long and lanky but we're so we always used to chill in my garage and smoke weed cigarettes drink or whatever uh my mom was fine with it as long as we weren't drinking or she wasn't there i didn't really smoke cigarettes ever ever um that was my job no no i'm saying really you didn't you hated it yeah genuinely i got headaches when i was in seventh grade and i tried it you were like dude i'm good you tried it like once and you're like fuck this oh try it once and i was like this is my whole personality i just always have packs of cigarettes do you here's another great friend thing you would do you would go with me to circle k while i would wait on the side and ask dudes to buy me cigarettes do you remember that yes sit with three dollars cigarettes why was there a play that i was the disarming guy to ask oh no yeah that was booze no but i i had the fuck it yeah you had the fuck it thing after the phone call you were like oh my god i'm so sorry i'm so sorry i'm so sorry i'm so sorry i'm so sorry really on your fucking shit yeah and you're like dude and he's like legitimately be like a guy like me now walking in a circle k and these two fucking kids would come around the corner and go hey mister can you buy us cigarettes and whenever they were like no we were like fuck you we were like mean about it we weren't like i'm so sorry i'm embarrassed i was 4 10 in seventh grade and five three but i think freshman year yeah yeah so like five six freshman year no and i was like um made me be better friends with girls and people and develop a personality because i was uh yeah i was behind the eight ball at that time yeah but you came into your own in high school middle school we were both goofy as fuck we were also like i was just trying to be there i was just trying i was almost annoying i was just like trying to be funny all the time but mike was being very fucking funny and i was just trying to be funny all the time in a smart way which i was just out here goofballing goofballing well no you know you had more tricks you always had more like you have the voice voice manipulation like you know manipulate your voice like a yes fraud no but which which can um i mean that that's uh uh way more effective and useful well that's for prank phone calling because you know when that came in well it's also for like calming your mom down because you go to your go-to which at the time you'd always have something that would make her laugh yeah um but then you remember and you had yeah you you were but when we go to football camp together i'd always prank phone call yeah i see you football yeah csu seven on seven camp yeah when we would like uh dude i was telling someone this story do you remember in high school where we went up to carney for the football camp and then on the way back to the bus air conditioning broke do you remember yes and we were all like yes but then do you remember that i bought novelty porn mags with jason garcia and jaime garcia right i bought a which is the only time that you kind of like fully committed to that sect of crew yeah shout out was for like garcia's was for like porn mag no i thought it was we were in the we stopped purchase we were traveling back from nebraska we stopped at like a truck stop and everyone was supposed to pee and stuff and i was like how funny would it be if i bought and i remember what it was it was chubbers it was a three-pack it was like a chubber it was called chubbers it was like elderly monthly it was like three really gross magazines that clearly were for like sick mother and we were like we thought it was funny in the truck stop and i had a fake idea at this point so i can buy cigarettes and i bought it by the way my id it was clearly fake but i bought the porn mags yeah we were walking out to like show everybody we got one on the bus and then we got busted the coach was like who fucking bought this and everyone was like it was jaime garcia or soda and i was like it was me and we all got taken off the bus and yelled at and then we rode back but someone kept chubbers and i remember like you and one other person looked at it and laughing so hard that you were like why did you buy this and i was like i don't know i thought it was the funniest one to buy i remember getting fucking screamed at it no but it was intentional it was for the joke though it was all for the joke and uh it was the funniest thing to buy at that moment and it hit it hit we needed it there's no ac it was humid we were all going crazy we were coming back from a tackle football summer camp which by the way was not allowed in our state we had to go to a different state twice twice they were like hey you can't tackle until august and our coach was like we gonna fool them yeah our coach was like found a loophole early july we're going up to nebraska and then we just drove up to this fucking football camp and went full contact in the middle of the summer dude i remember that yeah that was like i remember that bus breaking down and watching it was like lord of the flies we all went fucking crazy because we were like it was just a in the middle of summer it was i remember when you ate that dude's ear what you just ate it just ate it yeah because we were going crazy oh yeah i just went full crazy kill the kid yeah that'd be funny if that's what they clip from the podcast and they go did dan soda murder of another boy in high school another another you're killing boys bro just give up that you're killing fucking boys dude yeah dude i love that uh i love that i'm gonna see you more living in los angeles yeah this is great this was like it was very fun to go to your house and see you be relaxed yeah it's a um it's such a cool like i said you have 12 months out of the year you can be outside so for my five-year-old daughter yeah like you i mean you want to talk about endless entertainment is access to the beach and but then um riding the beach i'm gonna tell you it was like there was this surreal moment where we're riding to 7-eleven to get slurpees because his daughter loves slurpees because she rules and she's got good taste she does and so we went to 7-eleven to get a slurpee it was right when i got off the plane we're just riding i'm sweating i'm in yeah just like this i got pretty embarrassed pretty fast no no because he's he's being kind to me dude got off the plane i'm like yo um it just timed up weird so we're kind of waiting around so i'm like we got to go get the slurpee you know i got to stay on the front end of the idea and the excitement of the idea with my daughter and not enter into so he gets to the house i'm like yo can we uh go get a slurpee just ride little ways and i'm on an e-bike so he's not chilling he's just like he is not i'm on a mountain and i got a gas and uphill i got a gas and uphill and rolling his pan i haven't done this move with the bike you know yeah standing up dude i did that but i still got it i still got that move oh yeah yeah no he he he hadn't lost it but my legs were going up a hill my legs were like no and then so this is just real ego shit when you gas out and a five-year-old is looking at you like your daughter's on the back of the e-bike like what happened to him and i was just like sweating and i just created a song to make it cool that i was walking my bike and it worked it worked it worked like gangbusters and just like in seventh grade those are the things that i appreciate most yeah that was it was a great trick because she was chanting that for the whole way she was chanting it when she had to i was like i get off and i walk my bike and i was like what is it she goes walk my bike it was great you're hiding in place but it was really funny to like be chilling having a slurpee outside of 7-eleven shit we used to do in middle school and be like damn and your wife and daughter are with us yeah this is really cool it's just like a moment where you're like i hope more people get that to have people in their lives long enough that you get to kind of live a similar experience but as an adult now and where you go like like your uh your wife took a picture of me riding a bike and sent it to my Katie and she was like you look goofy as hell she's like you're so cute but you look goofy as hell i was like i felt goofy as hell i haven't ridden a bike in forever i didn't my knees are out to the side look like a fucking dickhead but the time of my life the time of my life also the most middle school shit in the world that you don't think about is sweating in jeans right you used to be so cool just sweating in jeans and now as an adult you're like oh i gotta go home and change i gotta put on my athletic gear yeah you're usually not surprised you get the surprise sweats and jeans yeah and i hadn't i hadn't sweat in jeans in a fucking long time except for volleyball yeah yeah that's and that's only when i'm playing with the boys the um playing with the no it was cool and i think it's equally uh you're recognizing um you know it was what was wild is the whole living circumstance and all the things that offered family was like equal as awesome to a whole the whole another component of like the the being able to coach and affect players hell yeah and the opportunity um with uh in in la with the chargers like harbaugh's the coolest dude ever dude it's but what's crazy is do you remember the old magnets you used to have in your room that were the nfl standings yeah and you would like change them all the time yep like people don't understand like when you're talking about you when you're at the hollywood bowl and you're like oh i saw this dude i remember you when we were in like seven through eight years old and you were like oh i saw this dude i remember you when we were in like seven three it's great this is what i was telling christian mccaffrey that when you used to work for the broncos you would get media guides remember that how you always had to stack a media guide in your closet and this dude would just read the media guy but you don't understand the depth of knowledge of what that is you're looking at like not only past attempts and completions you're looking at like third down on like a certain season the the like all this stuff that you used to just go through and i remember sitting there watching jim harbaugh on the colts after the bears when he got when he was captain comeback for the colts and we're just sitting there watching it in your living room downstairs with gary's subwoofer that he was very proud of super proud he was super proud of his subwoofer he would always be like that's a subwoofer and you're like his stepdad and you'd be like all right gary he'd be like because he had his stepdad's name was gary everyone was named gary in the no so when we once we once we got to two gary's we were like dude you know what let's just cut this rat race and marry a katie let's both marry that's crazy i didn't even think of that we were both married katies that is crazy dude never and by the way your wife says this all the time never met a katie i didn't like i mean two uh one name abbreviated in two letters come on come on kt easy to spell um but dude i remember like but i remember like watching those games i remember the the thing i always remember is because i slept at your house pretty much every weekend of eighth grade and ninth grade and i remember you had a tv in your room huge you had a bathroom in your room yeah crazier and i remember what like we'd watch snl late at night on saturdays and then we'd wake up and watch nfl primetime with berman and tom jackson yep at like 8 a.m colorado time no so like because game started at 10 a.m quite literally we are 42 and three years old yeah 43 that have the same interests as we did yeah in seventh grade yeah sorry you go some comedy and then you wake up and and then go do football yeah it's exactly what happened last night you're at the show then you wake up this morning go to practice yeah and it was crazy because that's why i love obviously jim harbaugh to me as a 49er fan i super into harbaugh when he took over the niners and i loved the khakis and everything about it get us to the super bowl he goes to michigan comes back and then now you're coaching for him and i love what i was just like dude is he the man you're like he's the man well yeah and like it's also like you want to always feel like you're progressing and sure getting better and you realize as you go you're as good as the those who you surround yourself with yeah and uh you know check coach it's crazy look at stanford oh you know what i'll go all the way back stand on business san diego state like san diego state into stanford yeah into the niners and into michigan into into the chargers yeah and it's cool to you know one thing that is super obvious is he's very adept at identifying you know the components players and coaches to create a team yeah um but he's also just like flexed to me of sheer and utter complete security in himself and so much um genuine authentic yeah on any any he is who he is that's why people are like yeah like i remember that interview he did where he was like talking about uh he'd just go pitch against the wall or whatever and i was like dude i love that i also like a guy that doesn't shy away from saying he drinks milk right milk is the best yes milk rules and like by with by percentage by percentage he's falling on the sword because there's like so there's too much milk in the game sure there's too many people drinking the amount of milk at the as much as he likes it why is he the only one why is exactly pushing it you know what's funny is when i used to be on the bonfire uh jay would always make fun of me because i used to go over to his house in queens and his ex-wife would cook dinner and i'd be like oh can i get a glass of milk yeah i was climbing you for the cold glass of milk back in 95 bro i promise you i've been about that life but you know who was the first one but he assessed like i like it more than i give a shit about taking the shit so i'll just ride the shit out dude i'm drinking this milk i fucking love milk and the first person and i swear to god the first person that stood up and pushed back about it yeah was shane we had shane on the bonfire and big jay was like shane line soda loves milk and then i remember you could find it shane milk rules dude and you watch jay go you know like it and shane was like very shane like milk rules dude you don't understand milk and it does i fucking love milk now he loves milk enough to know all the things that's why me and harbaugh dude no but you know you're an expert enough to know all the things not to do after drinking milk yeah you don't run the hard way god you don't run no if lay down if you must yeah you don't do the worm don't do the wormer that's gonna come out yeah there really is stuff and and what you can and cannot mix it with honestly thai food i would not mix uh milk with really or chinese food ah but italian food often poo-pooed and you will poo-poo yeah italian food you can get away with it yeah i like a lasagna with a glass of milk i'll see you in the comment section and you know i don't know you fucking catch me outside dude i love milk yeah i love it so much and honestly if i ever do get to meet the great jim harbaugh i will bring up milk you excited to meet you and i'll go two percent or bust i'll go whole i'll go whole all day i won't go raw or skim but i'll go two percent or whole that's a bone structure that's whole all day dude like wolva fucking green bro i am animanium man do you remember when i broke my shoulder freshman year of football i do and then i got on percocets and then i remember um you in a sling being kind of fussy yeah dude i was a little bitchy because i used to i used to well also i was working my way through a percocet addiction right because they gave me all these percocets and i was like oh no a guy with no key pre-awareness like so like they're just like whatever dude they were like oh hey uh also we didn't really know this at the time in the late 90s but you can basically map out if both sides of your family have an addiction problem but we had percocet nor did we ever have it so when you took it i remember you going like dude it was for real these are awesome yeah it was for like i can't like spare any and dude i remember i'd do a thing where like i broke my i broke my shoulder and i was like uh and they were like coach barker was like all right so you're gonna come to practice every day and i was like for sure and i'd like show up for practice and stuff in my sling and then it just the perks as i kept munching perks i'd be like oh you know ryan's house is pretty close and i can smoke cigarettes there on perks and that's better than watching practice and then if i give him a perk he'll give me a pack of cigarettes and it was and then so that's when i got fussy when i stopped the percocets because i also ran out we didn't know that was withdrawals yes we didn't know that was a thing called withdrawals but also it sucked because like i couldn't use my arm for like four months of the school year and it was freshman year everyone was fingering yeah except me that's the only reason you weren't yeah there's a lot more reasons i couldn't get girls no but it gave us an opportunity to develop personality we really had to stand out for people to acknowledge our existence so something that i i've honestly said out loud for the first time talking to christian which never crossed my mind because i love all our friends we graduated high school with and i love everything we really missed an opportunity to move to grandview and be the first graduating class because like if you think about it now as adults we could have taken our whole crew of friends and gone over there and been the first seniors at that high school because i think about when we were in high school and that so another high school opened a new high school opened when we were sophomores and they were like oh you guys can transfer to this high school which is like a little farther away yeah but but it was brand new and it was like all right but we were kind of leaning into like you know we're not just your everyday suburban we've got a little edge to us true we did like the little grime yeah we did like the grime we did like a little bit of the we didn't but i out loud i was kind of like damn we really did try to go to all their parties no i mean just on the weekends we'd be like is there is there a party going on over there they're like leave us alone you fucking dirtbags i mean in hindsight as an adult if we're motivated from an educational you know standpoint it's probably the best move too yeah um you know the most resources and uh newer newer uh newer resources and also probably i mean i don't know our high school had international baccalaureate yeah it did i took i took a class senior year um we had a bunch of people that uh i mean that's a weird deal yeah because there were like foreign exchange students yeah we had a giant high school yeah high school was like graduated 700 or something yeah 779 kids were in our graduating class yeah and it was like our freshman sophomore year our high school was over 3 000 kids which is like fucking big i was hitting numbers dude i remember walking to freshman football with you it was before i broke my shoulder so i knew something and i was five three you were five three i was i want to say i was like five ten you were i was about five ten skinny as a rail but do you remember walking the neck roll neck roll baby had to make it look like i was bigger um do you remember walking the two-a-days freshman year as it was it just looked like you were shrugging all the time uh but i remember walking the two-a-days with you on the first day of hitting being like on that path that we're yeah that was not it's not cool we were walking to be on the front side of puberty in the post-pubescent era this i couldn't say that better myself freshman football yeah and there's other men that'll agree with you that were on the wrong side of it like we were if you're not one of these guys that hits puberty until you're 15 or 16 freshman football is a fucking nightmare because there's guys like garapay who showed up a man freshman year he's one of our still one of my best friends he just fast-tracked you know yeah like uh do you remember showing up though and he was doing yeah he was repping 225 and we were like what the fuck is this me and mike look like little boys and we were like what did i we had long hair we had bob cuts that were like long hair we were like what is this and like just fucking racking 225 just dude i remember but kurt dooley who by the way i had uh lunch with he lives in indianapolis yeah he says what's up what's up what's up kurt dooley man he was another guy that was like a full-grown dude right like freshman year he was like a full he had like uh veins in his arms he had like biceps with veins in them and mike and i were straight up little boys yep and we walked we i spent the night at his house during two-a-days where you do two football practices in a day and like on the third day of two-a-days full contact we were doing hitting drills and i remember mike and i walking from your house which was walking distance to the it was a stressful situation it was like dude i remember how it smelled the dew it was like early in the morning and i remember expressing the fear i had to mike as we're walking to school where i was like we're gonna get fucking killed we had to go against like marcus sias and like kurt dooley and fucking dance who were like all men and we're like fuck and i remember that i remember being yeah frozen with that fear of being like fuck yeah and then it sucked i tried to call out capstick that was a bad move i went for his ankles and then garipay knocked the shit out of me no i um we were surviving it uh for better times yeah we were crushing the opportunity to develop personality that is exact you know what's funny it was a gigantic opportunity i know you're gonna earn everything you are yeah i would absolutely agree yeah that that was the common thread for us from seventh grade oh yeah to late junior year yeah and so like late junior year and so at that point in your life that amount of time is such a substantial portion of your existence exactly it is feels like it's never gonna end it's the end all that's yeah we literally got the opportunity to find out who we were or what our personalities were in a situation and i think that's what a lot of teenagers go through but i feel like sometimes teenagers don't have i think what's the importance is is like our friendship was never about like provide it wasn't about being cool it was just like oh we're both kind of we're in that situation yeah and it was comfortable no we really liked being around each other yeah and we really liked funny stuff being goofy and like um and then we had like circumstance yeah and um we had to do something with our time so not all of it positive but but we actually you probably don't um you know i guess succeed going through the city of new york sure had you not been combing the streets of aurora a town a town down yeah dude and i really do think there was like you know i think a lot because we had to like not really get in trouble sure we had to not get captured not get captured yep not change for the worst not sour there was always this like there was always this like um undying positivity in the face of shit in like of like bad shit happening there was this kind of like goofiness that this like foolishness that carried us through yeah because i remember you were fucking really good at football you were just undersized yeah it was just not like a minute i got i got uh to like my height of five nine at my junior year yeah yeah junior year but then what was impressive about you is you're just like pure game of football of like learning every step of the way whether it be spartan football ayl you know what i mean then you move on to smoky hill but then you're also ball boying and you're like watching all this crazy shit happen with the broncos they win their two super bowls while you're a fucking ball boy because of my ball distribution all about ball correlation causation fuck dude tell me am i misremembering i've told this story before but i don't want to misremember it's a story you told me about when you were ball boying john elway's last game at mile high stadium 1998 afc championship game against the jets you were ball boying and you told me the mr pibb story about when elway chugged a mr pibb at halftime yeah and i always thought that was the coolest shit no no it's like when you're friends with a ball boy and you're like the ball boy of the denver broncos yeah even if you're not a broncos fan i was an irish fan he would tell me john elway stories that you're like that's the coolest shit in the world no it was uh i was like um after the the final super bowl against atlanta when he like the night of the game or he finished the night he was at some table talking to some people that i was too young to know but i was like um in the rafters basically sure just watching him watch on a big screen his final you know his final game on the field yeah so yeah he i mean yeah pretty much um kind of like you've committed to your passion of comedy i've committed a vast majority of my life to the game of football i mean dude it's been since you know what's crazy is like i remember starting stand-up in tucson in 2004 right and then we grabbed we both graduate college in 05 chad moves down to tucson and chad and i are living there because he was punting still after unc yeah he was like wanted to stay in a warm place where he could like practice kicks and i remember you got you were interning with the broncos the 05 season yep that was the season they lost to the steelers in the afc championship game and then kubiak brought you to houston and it was like we're off and running like i'm emceeing at laughs in two tucson and then you're calling us on i remember being in chad's truck that big great truck he had and you were like do you want to know who we're going to draft and it was the reggie bush vince young matt liner year yeah jay cutler and i was like who are you taking and you were like we're going to take a defensive end we're taking mario williams and we were i remember chad and i were in the truck yeah we were like who the fuck and you were like it was just crazy to watch your coach brain then because you go well we're in the afc south with peyton manning so you need pressure on peyton manning that's what kubiak believes and i was like fuck yeah and now what's crazy is kubiak's kids are coaching against you you know like you're gonna play kubiak son twice this season yeah i have a i have like a direct strong relationship with every offensive play caller west of arizona that's crazy vegas this is fucking crazy to me because to me it's like football to us is going to the rick new heisel camp in 1995 and we're excited we get to meet rishan salam r.i.p yeah or michael westbrook yeah who like comes and plays 7v7 with all the campers so i was doing this is crazy but i was doing press for something for like a show in houston right and i get on this morning talk show and i'm talking to people and i'm like oh my god i'm gonna be like oh my god i'm gonna be like oh my god i'm gonna be like oh my god i'm gonna be like oh my god i'm talking to one of the guys and he's former houston texan linebacker ted johnson who played for the patriots and i was like you went to see you i'm on the phone i'm like doing the interview and he goes i did go to see you and i was like you were a coach at rick new heisel's football camp and he was like yeah we had to be coaches yeah we were like on the team you don't remember me you didn't pay attention to me that's what i said i go i go dude i was one of your linebackers yeah and he was like no you weren't and i was like yeah dude you were our linebacker coach at that camp and i go do you know who else was at that camp and it was right when you took miami job i go head coach miami dolphins mike mcdaniel and to me that's what's crazy it's like we're just at a football camp stealing oreos from the lunch place to take back to the dorms yeah that's like all we were concerned about we knew how to scavenge we knew how to scavenge and again kids what's the lesson don't get caught it's not illegal if you don't get caught but we would but i it's like to me that's always to me that's like what football is for us it's like this summer camp where it's fun as hell we're staying in boulder for four days and then we go back home to fucking the birds well i went to your work yesterday yeah and what was that for me as probably the garage i mean yeah to watch um but it goes back to the garage of just getting like but it's also means like i i appreciate and i remember all like like not only your performances but then your self-critique of your performances over a long period of time yeah and i know that you're working at it and to see the you know what you'd expect um in terms of results from how much you've put in and watch it come to life it's like you know every time you're always improving with some in some way shape or form to like give to to be with the audience yeah and make it like the garage exactly because like it's always when it comes back to you just the thing that you're the most thousands of people at the same time yeah you know but it really comes back to like that moment where you're like oh this is just what it is it's just a heightened version of this thing that's just a social organization and you got to be a generous lover bro yeah brother yeah it's a key party yeah and everyone's but you got a lot of work to do you're really doing all the work you gotta do all the work but you know what was really fun last night was you know shout out to shane for having us at amazing me on the show him and he's the best but it was really cool and what i loved watching your coach brain watch was watching him run his kevin hart roast jokes because like almost running them like a play and you were loving them but the coolest part was mike lawrence who's one of the writers for shane was backstage with us and i've known mike for 20 years yeah and i got to tell i got this mcdaniel this is when my brain was leaking yeah but it was like what is but i was like that's the guy that wrote the joke well well then to watch him go and i'm watching him do his art and he's like no i'm gonna i'm really gonna make sure these jokes jokes crush because i'm gonna do them and pay a lot of attention yeah and like all the nuances to the art of stand-up comedy yeah it's so cool yeah watching mike lawrence like watch the jokes that he wrote and him like telling me how shane made it better or like what he did to the joke to like but that was very fun to have you because you know you and nick were back there and i was like oh you gotta but you gotta listen to this and that's why i was telling mike lawrence i was like you know this is like one of my i didn't tell you what you do but i was just like he's fascinated with joke writing and mike lawrence was like i'll tell you about my joke you know like i wrote this joke and this and it was it was fucking in and just in my life it was cool to put you and mike lawrence together and go like hey this guy is a uh fucking world-class play caller and play he's like designs plays and this guy's one of the best joke writers in the game yeah so it's like fun to introduce you to a person that doesn't do the same thing you do but there are parallels in what you do yeah there are you know there are parallels in what you do and there are parallels in what you do yeah they're like they're both autistic on a certain level have to be have to be have to be what are you willing to do for success give up social grace taste the tiz you know taste of the tiz to get to the top taste the tiz to get to the top and don't get caught dude i told my mom i was doing the podcast and i was like i don't know if i want you to watch this because i might admit stuff but honestly it's a good podcast i don't know if i want you to watch this because it's just like um one of the coolest moments of our lives was and i'll never forget this because you know you're a coach in the nfl and you go houston you go you coach in sacramento with dennis green and then you jump and you go to washington then cleveland atlanta so i'm always like bouncing with you to all these teams every single team you have a fourth of the national football league yeah excess um brand and teamwear yeah teamwork access you've wrote every every city but then the coolest shit was you texted me and you were like bro i'm a 49er when kyle and you went from atlanta to san francisco i was very excited to send that text i still have i have a screen grab i knew i knew it was gonna be i knew in classic only child you know um dreamland the world is revolving around me it's happening um but this thing that you said be patient and i did you sent me back but back in the day when i would when i'd cry when i'd stay at your house all the time you know you're a broncos house gary worked for the broncos you're a ball boy uh your mom was was all in on the orange and blue and your mom always used to tease me when i would stay at your house because i'd wear 49ers and i'd wear 49ers and i'd wear 49ers and i'd wear 49ers stuff yeah she would always go you're wearing the wrong colors but in like a fun way not in like a mean way like you know you know around here we wear orange and blue and i'm in my 49er stuff loved it whatever so mike's in the nfl you know i see your mom in other places but then i remember specifically it was the thanksgiving game of the first season you guys were in san francisco jimmy g it's when betherd got injured you put in jimmy g it was that game but i show up that was the first home game i got to go to with you on the staff of the 49ers and i remember i showed up and i saw your mom and she was wearing 49ers stuff and the first thing she said to me is she goes i'm finally wearing the right colors and i was like callback donna that's a hell of a callback that was like uh that was like a 30 year callback that she fucking nailed and i was like let's go it was awesome and now it's bolt up i like learning the new sayings when i go to this when i when he goes to a different team i learn yeah but i'm happy and i said this on part of my take but it's true i'm happy to be reunited with the harbaugh family phrase right who's got it better than us no i told i told coach harbaugh about that like within the first hour because it was such a memory of that i think uh we as in i think dan we were still drinking yes we were and i had just done and uh i was in washington dc yeah and it was the packers packers niners that was the game where paul and kaepernick went off yeah for like 268 rushing and like three or under three throwing yeah set a record playoff record and um the whole street knew that saying because i was and you're on the front you're on the front end of it i was very screaming it and i'm gonna tell you what happened also what had happened because i was with uh a buddy of ours that went to smoky hill he lived in dc r.i.p luke he passed away but we were drinking during the day and this guy came into the bar and was selling nfl jerseys and i bought a vernon davis 49ers jersey and that night at the show yeah i had it under my shirt in the 49ers one and i ripped it i was like who's got it on stage dude like after my act i was like who's got it better than us nobody i was screaming that out dude that ruled most hungover train ride i've ever had in my life was after that game after we hung out that night yeah i took a train back to new york city and i was fucking really hung on that's now we don't drink and now we can wake up early yeah and now we enjoy candy you know what's very funny yes when i saw you at top golf when you were atlanta and you had quit drinking i think i was maybe two years sober at that time of quitting drinking what's crazy is what brought us back to our middle school friendship when you quit drinking you love candy yep you just love candy no and you and immediately we're back to both of us being like same same have you tried this new candy yeah dude it really became instantly like yeah what candy are you eating are you on that high chew stuff i got you were putting on you're the one that put me on the high juice of course i did holy shit i forgot i'm sorry to all the exes i dated when i was and by the way katie was the one that got me off hygiene she's like you eat this shit at a crazy rate but you had him at your age and i was like i'm gonna eat this shit at a crazy rate but you had him at yale yeah but have you hit the caramel high chews yes the ones with the caramel in the middle no just it's caramel flavor it's just commitment to caramel it's like think soft werther's original because that's what i was doing was the werther original caramel apples grandpa which are yeah dude i don't care though i'm sorry i'm starting to love hard candies i'm starting to get real into love and by the way i know you're a jelly bean guy yeah we could go we could we could turn this into a three-hour podcast we'll talk jelly beans because oh what do you know about jelly beans brother you just missed jelly you just missed bean season bean fest bean fest bean feast is easter i want a bean feast can we get there from uh charlie and the chocolate factory i'm gonna have a bean feast they do why not skittles does a jelly bean during easter uh which is i mean not only do they the kids are so lucky these days welches does uh jolly rancher jelly beans try them out what jolly rancher no those are two different things damn welcome to the post welcome to 2026 man we're in the future we don't have flying cars but we got jolly rancher jelly that would be us coming to the future going back like crashing one of our the sleepovers in seventh grade and being like hey we're old you we're old mike and dan they go what's 2026 like only he's an nfl coach and i'm a standard comedian are there flying cars no but there are jolly rancher jelly beans no i i mean dude bean feast quite honestly don't hold it against us no one knows what the future is going to bring dude back to the future didn't even know cell phones were going to exist what a miss what an absolute miss 85 do you think do you think someone's throwing something and by the way cell phones kind of were around in 85 i just don't think they thought they were going to catch on well remember car phones they didn't they didn't see this coming your mom had a car phone and she did in the uh jeep grand cherry yep when she worked at jc petty yep and i remember watching you make a call out of that i was like what is this science shit no it's very good for calls to and from home to destination great that's but it's specific to that no more that's it yeah but honestly stays in the car if i'm rebooking how we own the only time you got caught we should be able to do that yeah we should be able to do that we should have done the voicemail from your mom's car phone then we would have been untouchable then they would have been like this is an unreachable number what is this a phone in a car yeah we would have but then at that point what boundaries would have held us then we would have been lost to the nothingness of a boundary of this life turn the page we're seniors wearing capes and shit yeah uh dude uh i've been waiting to have you on this podcast forever i love you i'm honored man i'm honored it's just it's like i truly felt like some people didn't believe i was friends with you because the way that i talk about it and they're like i don't think this guy actually knows my prove it prove it um sorry for when i get loud when i get mad at people talking shit about you but i'm always gonna do that and most importantly shout out to chad for being the third member of the trifecta who we love who we love love your big strong legs and hey dude good luck this season he got he educated himself kicking for real he got an education for that's a hustle out of a ball that's a hustle good luck this season appreciate it can i still get that marion butts jersey yeah number 36 hold the marion that's a hustle out of a ball that's a hustle out of a ball that's a hustle good luck to all of you