Rewind with Karen & Georgia - 121: Clomp Everywhere

This is exactly right. In New Orleans, truckers kept getting sideswiped the exact same way. When a man is found murdered under questionable circumstances related to these accidents, the rubber hits the road. And what the feds uncover is a complex scheme of staged wrecks, financial fraud, and a pair of conspiring lovers behind it. This is a story about fake accidents that led to real consequences. Listen to Over My Dead Body, Operation Sideswipe, wherever you get your podcasts. Audible subscribers can binge all episodes early and ad-free right now. Join Audible in the Audible app or by subscribing on Apple Podcasts or Spotify. There are plenty of things that keep you up at night. Your sleep tracker shouldn't be one of them. Hatch Sleep Clock does it differently. It tracks your sleep from your nightstand. No ring, wristband, or judgmental score waiting for you in the morning. Instead, you'll get personalized insights to understand your sleep and recommendations to build a routine you'll love night after night. Hatch Sleep Clock. The sleep tracker designed to get you to sleep. Available now on Hatch.co. Goodbye. The Hulu original series, Phony, is now streaming on Hulu and Hulu on Disney+. Sonny's life is pretty great until he wakes up from a car accident to a world that looks exactly like his, with one exception, his mom. Starring five-time Emmy nominee Connie Britton and Sam Navola, this small town is hiding the mother of all mysteries just beneath the surface. Watch the Hulu original series, Phony. Now streaming on Hulu and Hulu on Disney+, for bundle subscribers. Terms apply. Goodbye. Hello. And welcome to Rewind with Karen and Georgia. This is the show where we look back on our old. old episodes from 2018 with all new insights and case updates and topical cultural references. Today, we're rewinding to episode 121, which we named Clomp Everywhere. This episode originally came out on May 17th, 2018. Let's listen to the intro of episode 121. And Beguin. And Beguin, the queen, eh? Apophode. White now. Of my favorite movie. Oh, God. Should we start over? Stephen just shook his head no. Stephen said no, don't start over. I don't think we're, yeah. You like Elmer Fudd? You like the Elmer Fudd intro? That made me laugh. All right. Well, let's leave it in. Then, you know what it seems like, so let's leave it in. Can you do pictures? I've drunk this entire episode. Yes, this is a Q&A. This is not a secret. Always a secret with that girl. Always leaning in with her weird breath. I have to tell you something. And then. I have to tell you something I threw up earlier. I threw up and I took a nap and came back to the bar. What? Did you get away from me? I should do? Sorry, I just had this idea. Yeah. What if I did a one-woman show where it's me and drunk me from the 90s switching off and it's like the spotlight goes up. Yes, exactly. Or it's just like, why did you feel the need to escape into the bottle every night? I'd be like, sorry, what are you talking about? I'm just thirsty. You used to party and now you're. What do you like? Can you. I want you to. Let's keep going with this. Okay. I want you to record the. I want to record Sober Current Karen. Okay. And so that, you know, we don't. Switching won't get too confusing. Okay. So we just have recorded Karen and then drunk Karen, old Karen is in person there. So you're saying I get to drink again just because it's a show and it's not my fault and it wasn't my idea. Fake drunk Karen. Okay. Is there again. Great. Okay. What is her hair? Does she have her hair in a ponytail? Did she wear a ponytail? She's just cut bangs. Hold on. It looks good. You don't know? You don't know? All right. Sorry. I would. Drunk Karen was the kind of person who would cut bangs so short that the next day when I would first see people who would. I would be premiering my bangs like at the Gap. People would be like, oh, wow. Like shocking bangs. They were like, I found a razor in the bathroom and I gave myself a trim. Like what I did to Barbie when I was four and was like, Barbie needs fucking bangs. And all you do, you basically just shaved her head in the bang area. Yes. Just shave the bangs. The more you cut Barbie's hair, the more you liked cutting Barbie's hair until you were down to the plugs. God. We're in Europe right now. Guys, bonjour. Bonjour. Comment allez-vous? For some reason, Karen wants to be in Paris really badly. Paris, France is what Europe is to me. We're in the UK and Europe. So we're in the pod lofts, technically. Right now. Technically, we're in the pod loft. In our time. You know what's funny, though? We. We. I don't think we need to be so constrained by the concept of time since people listen to this shit out of order anyway. Time, space, location, all of this shit. You know what? It's. It is all just human construct. It's a bucket. It's the government. Let it go. It's aliens. The clock is aliens. Let it go. Alien government. The government of Mars. It's the government trying to put their shit on you. Yeah, I'm like, I refuse till you like told what time it is by the government. I'm just saying, does government think smarter than man? Me? It's not smarter than me. Time. Time. Okay. I love him. So we're doing. There's always crying about some random person. Being in love with someone. Being in love with someone that the friend I'm talking to is like, I don't think you've ever talked about this person before. I don't. I don't know who you're talking about right now. No, I love him. I'm like talking about the bouncer. Then you trade a piece of clothing with some other drunk girl. Whatever happened to you? Once I had a drunk girl demand that we switch belts and I was just like, okay. You have to go with that. Drunk improv. Yeah. It's so much easier because if you tell a drunk girl who wants to switch belts with you, did she think it was funny? Because I would do that. I would get these ideas and I was like. I would switch outfits. Isn't this hilarious? I had one time I told all my friends, this is when I lived in Sacramento, I was like, you guys, I'm going to order a grasshopper. No, I'm doing it. I'm doing it. It was like a mint. Have you ever had a grasshopper? It's like a blended drink made of creamed mint. I just pictured you on Amazon ordering grasshoppers. The insects. The live grasshoppers. I'm going to. She is both constricted. No, I'm going to. Anyway. That's how I got my first pair of Doc Martens, though, was at a party. A drunk girl. Switched? When I was like 13. I was like, give me your fucking. I had like climbing boots on that I hated and she gave me her purple Docs. I know. Why? Because she was drunk? Because she was drunk and stupid. And like, she was like a basic bitch. You had pre. You had like broken in purple Docs. Yep. Eight. whole broken and purple docs congratulations my life yeah best shoes i've ever had why didn't i keep them okay first time you start wearing combat boots as a girl in your 20s i'm telling you if you hadn't had the experience if you're a girl who's like i need to curl the bottoms of my hair and always wear some version of a heel god bless yeah i get the comfort you're that's your style what i'm saying is take a summer off yeah get a job two towns over and just start wearing flannels and fucking combat boots just see what it feels like because i'm telling you there is something about lacing up a boot and having that thing of like oh you can't kick me in the toe and you start to call them shit kickers and then you feel like a fucking badass yeah and it's the best and you just sort of like you get real down to business yeah you clomp everywhere you clomp it's very tank girl but wherever you live yeah but you're still cute don't worry you're so cute there's so much cuteness available they all know this yeah these are people who are like yeah we're from now we have the internet we know how fashion works and we're back look at us getting into concept episodes q a episode what a great idea to not have to do homework the whole who came up with this idea to somehow sidestep full-on because at this point we've been doing homework for two years or a year yeah without a break and touring a year and a half without a break somewhere in there we were like hey we don't have to do this every week exactly the same way and they're like really good questions too that are like fun and i think that like i don't think we give boring answers to questions which i think is a good thing we need to do this again a we need to do it again i completely agree and b i think when we have the opportunity we put our whole heart and soul into whatever we're doing yes if that is um bad wikipedia research we give our whole heart and soul and if it's simply just earnestly answering people's questions we're there oh and steven's up in the mix as well we also made it like super long like it didn't need it we could do a fucking bonus 20 minute q a episode every week if we want yeah i mean at a certain point we could just be answering people's questions like old google we'll call it old google yeah and we'll just be yeah you know how you can't get answers to anything anymore right well that's us now we're gonna be your new search engine it's called what do you want us to google it's the thing of when your friend texts you a question that's like so googleable Like, you're a little honored that they asked you, but you're also a little annoyed that they didn't just. And then you're like, oh, are they lonely? Yeah, really. Do you miss me? Is that why you're asking me questions a map could answer? Right, about, like, wind patterns? I don't fucking know. You know I don't know. You know I don't know this. What question would you want to be asked? Oh, always snacks, for sure. Maybe, like, what's your current favorite, like, dessert? Go-to dessert. What is yours right now? Oh, Trader Joe's has these little mini passion fruit ice cream bars that are so creamy and good. They're not popsicles. They're, like, ice cream bars. Like, little ones with a little stick? Yeah, yeah. Just a mini popsicle. Or, like, a mini. Yeah, like a mini. Yeah, it's almost like a mini Dove bar. Yes, but they're just plain old passion fruit. What's yours? Does it have to be from Trader Joe's? No, no, no, no. Trader Joe's only. Just the thing you'd force yourself to eat protein so you can get to. Oh, sour skeddy strings, those gummy. It's the most childish gummy candy. But there's something about when you put, like, five of them in your mouth at once, because I'm about quantity. It's just so satisfying. Oh, my God. Yeah. I always say, like, if you have anxiety, carry gummy sour candies with you. That's right. Boom. Boom. Like, distraction. Totally. What if that's the way I've been self-medicating this whole time by just shoving as many gummy candies into my mouth as possible? Oh, we've got to have an intervention for you. That would be so funny. Did you see, like, one of those Wingstop kind of places now have, like, a sour gummy candy? No. Sour Patch Kids Wingstop, like, wings. Crossover. That's wrong. That's the disgusting thing I've ever heard. That's insane. And there's a little chopped up, like, blue and fucking red. No. Yes. Shit. You know what this means? And I know Shannon's going to come to us and say, hey, you guys, how about for a fan cult video? You eat the fucking Wingstop. God damn it. You know she is. Yeah, exactly. And it's all for the content, on top of which we're not even talking about this episode. Now we're just talking about other things we're going to do. Now that we've teased it. Okay. Okay. Should we close out this section and move on to questions? God, please. Okay. We'll be right back. October is the month when being scared is supposed to be fun. Terrified in a haunted house? Sure. Your actual house? Absolutely not. Feel safe in your home with SimpliSafe. SimpliSafe is designed to help stop intruders before they get inside. I recently got an alert from my camera outside that there is, like, someone prowling around. Late at night, and of course, I got freaked out. I opened my camera, and it was a big spider dangling in front of the camera. Which was terrifying in itself, but such a relief. And I love that I know that it works. You know what I mean? Like, it's so much better a spider than an actual person, but I'll be prepared. All the answers are on your phone. You don't have to worry and sit there and wring your hands. Join the more than 6 million people who entrust SimpliSafe with their home security. Right now, save 60% off with professional monitoring when you visit SimpliSafe.com. That's SimpliSafe.com. And when you order, please write in My Favorite Murder in the checkout survey. It lets them know that we sent you, and it really helps support the show. SimpliSafe, ahead of crime in real time. Goodbye. Most big goals are really just a bunch of small decisions made over time. And while that's incredibly annoying, it's also true. Start investing towards those bigger goals, one small decision at a time with Acorns. Sign up now and join over 14 million people already investing with Acorns. New customers. Get a $20 bonus investment just for signing up. Takes about two minutes and could be the quickest $20 you'll ever earn. Head to Acorns.com slash MFM. That's A-C-O-R-N-S dot com slash MFM to claim your $20 bonus today. Acorns.com slash MFM. Limited time offer. Terms and conditions apply. See Acorns.com slash terms for details. Paid non-client endorsement. Compensation provides incentive to positively promote Acorns. Tier 2 compensation provided. Potential subject to various factors such as customers' accounts, age, and investment settings. Does not include Acorns fees. Results do not predict or represent the performance of any Acorns portfolio. Investment results will vary. Investing involves risk. Acorns Advisors LLC and SEC-registered investment advisor. View important disclosures at Acorns.com slash MFM. Goodbye. Cozy season is nearly upon us. That means crisp weather and soft layers. Prepare accordingly with fall staples from Bombas. Bombas has your favorite footwear for fall, including new suede moccasins with cushy, choles, shearling lining, and water-resistant suede, plus soft slippers, slides, and booties. There's a Bombas sock for pretty much any fall occasion, from warm merino wool blends to sweat-wicking sports socks, and dressier options for weddings. And for every Bombas item purchased, they donated an essential clothing item to someone facing housing insecurity, with more than 200 million items donated so far. Okay, so when fall comes around, I have a pair of the Bombas booties pretty much in every room, so I can go out and buy them. I can grab them when my feet inevitably become freezing, which they are constantly. And they're so comfy, you can wear them around the house, I wear them to bed, and they just make everything feel a little cozier. Head over to Bombas.com slash MFM and use code MFM for 20% off your first purchase. That's B-O-M-B-A-S dot com slash MFM, code MFM at checkout. Goodbye. All right, let me ask you a question. Finally. Karen, this is a question from Lisa. Lisa, have you ever done an escape room? No. Me neither. No. I have no interest. Let's do it. Okay, like force ourselves to do it somewhere? Yeah. I mean, I think it's an interesting concept, and I've heard people talk about it. There were people, remember when we were at the St. Patrick's Day party at Joe's, there were people leaving to go to an escape room, and the way they described it sounded fun. To me, like, you're leaving a party where you just hang out and talk and drink to go escape from a room? Yeah. That's like, that's what you're doing. That's what you're doing right now. You just, it doesn't make sense to me. Yeah. Why don't you, you know, you could do, if you're at a party, you've never been at this apartment before. Let me run ahead. I'll lock some shit up and now just try to leave this party. I'll try to, I'll, I'll stop you all along the way. Here's my thing. I don't want to do things in, I don't want to do activities in public where you can succeed or fail. Right. And it's a panic to fucking succeed. Succeeding has a time limit. Yeah. And a panic. Yeah. So maybe you and Vince should do an escape room or a karaoke room when we're in Europe. I will a hundred percent do both of those with you because here's what will happen in the escape room. Vince will take over and be so fucking hilarious that we'll just stand there laughing while he takes care of it for us. And we won't care. Right. So we'll never escape. I mean, also I do have, there is a lot of faith in an, in the idea of an escape room because all it's going to take is one lunatic to run one of those where suddenly it's not a game. Right. And you're. You're actually locked into a weird. Oh, you're thinking of like the next saw movie. I'm I've just written and I've written saw 11. I believe it's escape room escape room. Okay. You want me to ask you more? No, let me ask you one. Go ahead. I think we should go back and forth. Okay, great. Um, let's see. Uh, just pick one at random. Don't even read it. Okay. Appetizers or desserts. Georgia appetizers. A hundred forever for the rest of my life. Really? That was from Mindy, by the way. Sorry. I should have said her name first. Mindy. I need to tell you. I need to tell you that my favorite food is happy hour and that's all I want is appetizers. And what's your, what would you say your number one, two, one, two, and three appetizers would be like at a normal place? Or if I could like have my dream appetizer. Um, let's say the scene we'll set for you is you're at the fanciest restaurant you would want to go to for like your birthday. Okay. And that would be. Oh shit, man. You can say a type. Okay. If you don't want to name the place. I guess Tam O'Shanter over here. Like that is the fanciest. That's awesome. Here's what I want. I don't care where it is. I want to fucking on point cheese plate. Yes. Like the on pointiest fucking cheese plate with honey. And the one we got in Cleveland. Yes. That was the best. Oh, you know what else I want? Many fucking corn dogs, fancy corn dogs. We should find out what that restaurant's called. We went to a restaurant in Cleveland. It was a brew pub. It had all these items. Go ahead. And then just like, uh, devil eggs. Oh, yes. You love a devil day. That's all. That's my three. Like, so I just want that for dinner every night. I might be too high in cholesterol for you. Okay. Uh, dessert or appetizers. What? My answer is a hundred percent dessert. Okay. I mean, I, not that I don't love a good appetizer, but I do am the person who truly, I don't talk about the fact that I'm saving room for dessert. I'm just doing it, but I'll only base it on the fact that I'm saving room for dessert. I'll only base it on if I know there's nothing more embarrassing when you're the only one that wants to get dessert. Do you guys want to order dessert? No. Come on, we'll split it. And everyone's just staring at you. I'm like, I'm paleo. But my favorite thing is when everyone gets dessert and when, even, even when the staunchest paleoist break down and get like one scoop of the thing. And then they're like, this is the craziest thing I've ever had. That's what life's all about. We've been living in Los Angeles for way too long. Everyone is a thing. Everyone is a fucking gluten free paleo. You're a real vegan, fucking. sugar-free juicing juicing fucking bullshit fat flush yes all right that's that was mine so what's yours okay um this is a different lisa it says different lisa thank you uh and this is another food question what are each of your favorite cereals oh shit that's a great question i love that these are not murder related i like it coming straight out of the box with those sugar corn pops corn sugar corn sugar pops are they called that i think now they're called corn pops right and those are the ones with the frog those are sugar smacks and those are little weird oat puffed oats this is puffed corn oh i don't know it they're bigger they look like golden nuggets and do they look like um what are those thing called those things called corn aztec corn that's right you know oh yeah corn pops corn pops those are good that's i could eat i'm not kidding like 13 bowls of those in a row i i can't have cereal in the house because i when i start to eat it i love it so much that i can't stop i think that's a normal thing for people for like a lot of women really like they can't have cereal in the house it's just because you keep on filling up to finish the milk i know i know i better finish this milk whoops too dry better put some more milk in mine is um raisin nut bran it's like the most boring i am such a nerd have you had it is that the one where the raisins are coated in nuts yes that's good it's actually incredibly sweet so it's not like it's a secret healthy it's not healthy i like this though it's so fucking good i want to cry and then like i'll pour a bowl and eat it and be like there weren't enough raisin nuts in there and so i'll pour another bowl to get more raisin nuts and then there's too many raisin nuts right it's my favorite i wonder if you shook that box i shake it every time and it never it's just always can't redistribute correctly no it's my problem uh regular milk um two percent is what i usually do okay my cousins used to do fat free and it was like that milk is clear it's water that's scary that milk is blue and you're not supposed to drink that anymore now i don't drink milk anymore but if i do yeah i mean i just don't have it yeah it's either like vanilla sugar but who cares were you gonna give us your almond milk order yeah but some fucking poor person's like i wanted to hear about murder do you have a ask a true cry ask a murder one okay could this is from hillary this is a fascinating question um could either of you have stayed married to robert graysmith robert graysmith was the um the cartoonist who worked at the san francisco chronicle when they were trying to solve the zodiac killings the weirdo and he wrote that book and he's jake gyllenhaal by the finch he definitely seemed i want you know you always want to be like no it's fascinating i would have been so interested he just seemed really um emotionally unavailable yes he didn't seem like a warm person yes yeah i think um i've already had that relationship and which was like what what what are the characteristics it was almost exactly like that where it's a person who's really nice but has their own interests and is basically feels like they're just living a entirely separate life who doesn't share doesn't share with you even if it's an interest you're not interested in yeah or do you just get sick of it after a while it's just not when somebody is so kind of dedicated to their own mind yeah it's just it's really lonely to be with a person like that yeah i'm too like i want to be up in everybody's business all the time for sure like i don't i want i need talking and i need you know that kind of thing and like a graysmith he there's some i was jake gyllenhaal so it was charming but he was a lunatic right right i need more codependency in my relationships and i'm not even kidding you need him to need you a little bit more yeah yeah i have a codependent personality which i thought was a big problem for a long time until my therapist was like well you and vince are interdependent you're not codependent because it's working out fine for both of you yeah because you're giving each other what you need exactly so it's okay that like you're a little that's the dream lunatic about it yeah and so i need someone more than that that's right you know what i mean i really do i like that um let's see relationship goals okay here's this one what's your favorite did they this is from katie what's your favorite did they or didn't they murder well if you want to get honest about it how about fucking natalie woods mysterious death and robert wagner and christopher walken and how they never talk about that or figure it out saying they just said they reopened the case and i was like tell us everything just tell us why like what what would be very cool now is if this next wave of the way crime solving starts to work is that we start to just get the true truth of like oh this person paid this person so it's almost like everything becomes an expose oh well so and so paid somebody a hundred thousand dollars yeah like to actually be able to track bribery to track all the things that are going on in the world to track all the things and just really know what really happened totally well steven made a good point that we need to bring our recorder with us on our tour because what if the zodiac is fucking found through dna oh wow we're there and we're just scrambling to scream into our phone to record an episode that would be a you know you do have a selfie stick right i do i'll bring it we need it that is brilliant if you're not already on the fan cult and i'm talking in the future because i think we've decided that while we're on our uk tour we're going to be posting videos yes now it turns out we're going to be doing with a fucking selfie stick selfie stick i think it'll be funny and fun i think it's a fucking great idea to do it that way i'm gonna i'm gonna bring a bigger purse just so i can carry it in my big purse i mean i have to say i don't like recording myself in any way but the idea of us keeping a video log as we travel through europe in the weirdest non it's not like we're going to be able to record ourselves in any way but we're almost anti-tourism the way chores end up going you like get there you get to your room you pass out you're super tired you work on your shit yeah you go to a show you have this in the back of this like weird auditorium with like weird snacks oh and they're going to be especially weird because they're fucking foreign snacks i love foreign snacks oh and it's going to be higher quality because they better they care about human beings oh it's going to be really nice and no vegetables no vegetables please okay wait was that you oh yeah yeah we said did they or didn't oh yeah robert wagner oh sorry i want that what's yours john bonnet oh john bonnet yeah they did what if what if all these oldies just start getting solved oh that'll be fun that'll be like that could be the perfect antidote to the trump administration like i already like when golden state killer when they arrested him i something lifted off of me that was just like like oh yeah more of this because it's fair finally justice yeah yeah it's so unfair that this motherfucker got to hide yes and yeah that's a good point it's finally fair yeah it's it's going to be even it's not but georgia yeah this is from justine justine do you believe in astrology no you do not but it's fun but you don't like believe it's the truth i think it's really fun and it doesn't hurt anyone and i like i always want to hear my horoscope if someone's like oh i'm going to read my horoscope fucking read me gemini but here's the problem too is that my sign gemini we're fucking known for being fat shit bananas crazy unreliable shitty people and i swear to god i'm not and i'm sure every gemini says this i'm not like normal gemini so i know gemini's yes and they're fucking whack my mother was a gemini oh shit oh no what was she like she like me at all um what were they like a little bit and you know but yeah it's just the turns it's the turns of like good mood bad mood or interested not interested not like you don't do it emotionally you're very steady emotionally in my opinion you change your mind a lot that's true but that's that's not true that's kind of true it's kind of true you know it uh to you taurus yes i yes except for the way they describe taurus taurus taurus instead of like the car commercial taurus um the way they describe it as like homebound earthy into flowers or whatever i'm like you're just describing a cow that's you're saying what a cow but don't they say you're like you guys are like uh you're the opposite of me where you like make a decision and there's no fucking changing your mind at all that's right stubborn stubborn super stubborn and super like stick to the plan yeah i don't believe i guess the thing is i don't believe in astrology i enjoy it so i don't believe you know what i mean like of course when i meet it when i meet a dude i'm dating that i'm into i look up gemini's and whatever the fuck go together exactly find that birthday yeah and everyone does this i wonder if i bet guys don't do it but girls do this all guys don't do it for sure you that's right you find the person's birthday and then you look up that like linda goodman sun signs you're like oh my god look at how compatible we are i will say like vince is a pretty perfect leo and which is like a steady fucking reliable dependable person And it works with my fucking crazy brain, Gemini. My sister's a Leo, too. Oh. You asked me that one. I did. Okay, so let me ask you one. Sorry, but did I say that was Justine's? Because it was Justine's question. Justine, Justine. It was fun to talk about Justine. Oh, okay. This is from Karina. Do you have any tips for traveling and easing anxiety in strange places? Or should I do a murder one? No, no, that's good. Music. Constantly have music in your ears or something soothing that you enjoy. Yeah, you've got to get those wireless earbuds. Oh, the best. They are worth, I think they're 150 bucks. This is not a commercial. It is not a commercial. This is like, if you're on old school headphones. And you keep walking past a doorknob and ripping them out of your fucking head. The worst. Get those wireless ones. They're little. It just feels like you are in your own world. And then you're able to build your own world a little bit. And know that if you. By traveling, if you mean you're nervous to fly on a plane. I just told somebody else this the day I was locked out of my house. And I said, ask me anything. You have to remember that when you're flying, you're safer on a plane than you are on your bathroom. Oh, my God. You're more likely to get killed in your bathroom than you are on a plane. And you have to watch. If you start to get nervous or your mental kind of storyline starts taking over, just start watching the flight attendants. They are so calm. They do it. All day long. There's. You can always look at them and be like, that's what I'm supposed to be matching. Yeah. And also, they know if you really start feeling like you're going to have a panic attack or something, fucking tell one of them. They're trained to deal with it. Yeah. Because people do get like. You just don't like to be in an enclosed space. But if you can get some earbuds, then you'll be in a weird world inside of your own head. And then it won't feel like you're just in a plane. My thing for traveling, too, with anxiety, which I've overcome because I've had to do it. I've had to travel so fucking much. So I would say travel a lot, but you can't do that, is that I kept realizing that I would be anxious and unhappy and nervous every time I'd go anywhere. And then I'd come back and everything would be fine. And I would be really bummed that I had missed an opportunity to explore and enjoy where I was and what I was doing. And it's just. I don't. You don't want to live your life being disappointed that your anxiety let you. Overtook your life. You know? Because I'd be like, "The cats are going to die. The house is. I need to get home." And I'd come home and the cats wouldn't give a shit that I was home. Yes. But they would for a minute. And then they would be over it. And I'm like, "Fuck. I wish I really had taken a walk instead of taking a nap because I was overwhelmed." Yeah. You know? And seen Seattle or whatever the fuck. So. But I think you're right in that you need the proof. If you have anxiety and then it keeps you from doing things, then you get to keep that storyline in your head because you never prove yourself otherwise. Right. Right. But like you were forced to travel. Yeah. Because suddenly you're like, "This is no big deal. I'm doing it every other weekend." Remember? Yeah. When we first planned the first tour, we were like, "We don't want to do that many dates and we don't want to go that many places because neither of us were that interested." And when he was like, "You guys are going to go to Australia," I was like, "No fucking way." Yeah. Those were all my reactions at first. I was like, "Well, great. I'm going to die on my way to Australia." Of course. I mean. Yeah. It's just. Yeah. When you have anxiety, it's hard to leave. Just know what your brain is serving up to you is normal human bullshit. Right. It's a lie. It's a lie. And it happens to everybody and you don't. It's not. Yeah. It's. The alarms aren't going off. It's actually just. Yeah. normal brain processes. Yeah. And practice for all of this makes perfect because the more you prove to yourself that you're incorrect about what you were worried about, the less you'll believe it when it comes up again and you'll just blow it off at some point, which is really fucking cool. Yeah. You'll have a new experience. Yeah. And hopefully find someone else, something else to be stressed out about. Right. They're out there. It's me, right? Yeah. I think so. Georgia. Yeah. And I don't know if you want to name names or not. Always. But this is from Kelly. "If you could go back to high school, which teacher would you tell off?" Oh. I don't remember his name, but there was this creepy fucking. Probably for the best. political science teacher who was like. He was like the poli-sci and the fucking football coach teacher, you know? And he'd like. He'd wear a gold chain and had his like. He always wore khakis and then the high school logo polo button polo shirt and would be unbuttoned a little bit of hair. And he would flirt with the popular girls. They loved him. I'm sure. And they would like. I remember one sitting on his lap for some reason. Wow. He was a creep, but only to the pretty popular girls, which I clearly wasn't. Not that I wanted his attention, but I was like, from a place of over here, this is fucking wrong and creepy. Yes. And everyone else loved him. There was, you know, the popular kid's favorite teacher. Yes. I'm sure he bought them beer. Yeah. Yeah. It's like almost like a weird cult springs up. Yeah. Well, also, those are those weird moments in when you're growing up and you're kind of like when you. Those lines between popular and unpopular are like hot and not hot, they can be blurry for a while. Yeah. Because you just don't ever want to know for sure, or you can kind of kid yourself or whatever. Yeah. But when there are creepy adults that are like hone in on girls and it starts to happen to you in your, you know, like when you're 13 and older, where suddenly, like, you know, you don't have a target on you. So at first you're like, oh, thank God. And then you're kind of like, I'm invisible. Yeah. And you don't know how to feel about it because it's like, it's so creepy. And yet at the same time, they don't give a shit about you. There's something wrong with you. And it's because it's because you're not living. It feels like it's because you don't know how to live in society the way everyone else does. Right. Like you're an outcast. When actually it's like you're not being targeted by a fucking predator. Predator. Yeah. I know there was a girl. Yeah. What about you? Um, we had a teacher, I had a teacher that was, I would just love to go in and be like, you, you have a rage issue. He was like this insane screamer and he was not like. Yeah. I think it was this thing. He was on the shorter side and I think it was a thing of like keeping the class in control, but it would go so far past normal yelling at a classroom full of kids and people would just be like, like sitting there, like rolling their eyes and he would be going, he would be like snapping and it was in Catholic school. Like they don't have to, there's, it's not the same like standards. They can kind of do whatever they want. So they, they, there were teachers in my high school that were fucking insane. Isn't it crazy to watch an adult? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Oh my God. I mean, it's crazy to watch an adult lose their temper when you're like younger and you're like an adult losing their temper is like funny almost and like, oh God. Well, especially when they're like seething where you're kind of like, sorry, this is about something else. This doesn't fit. This is not, this is not about chemistry. Was his name Joseph D'Angelo? I mean for real, like inappropriate anger where it's like, it's so nice that we're slowly coming into a time where that, that truly is inappropriate. Yeah. Like people go, oh, that's not normal. No. I feel like though, luckily there's more teachers I'd want to go back and think then I'd want to go back and yell at thankfully. Definitely. Definitely. Um, okay. Let's see here. All right. This is from Rebecca, which celebrity do you think has murdered someone and use their abundant resources to cover it up? I want it to be someone. Do you know who it is? Paul Giamatti. How dare you? How dare you? I bet he has killed people. No, the man is, his heart is right on his sleeve. How dare you say that about my sweet baby? His victims. Um, you know, I would say, I think it's someone more like, it's like a Vanna White type. One of those people where they, they're like head turns on their neck, like they're a weird couple. What about, uh, not Pat Sajak. Who's jeopardy? Alex Trebek. Alex Trebek. I think he's too much of a nerd to kill anybody. Yeah. He just looked like he likes to get dirty. Uh, this is from Kelly. What's your dream vacation? Oh God. A nap. Dream vacation? Dream vacation. I don't know. I really, I just like eating. So hot weather, cold weather. Okay. Hot, warm weather. Warm weather. Warm, sunny weather. Yeah. What's your favorite beach side or mountains? Jungle. A little of both. Okay. Kauai. I want to go to Kauai. Nice. There we go. Have you been to that Island? No. Have you been to Hawaii? Yeah. I can't believe how Hawaii smells. Oh, it's just tropical. Like you get out of that fucking airport. Well, I've, I've only been to Maui, but we walk out of the airport and you're just like, wait, what's happening? I think I'm going to do it this summer. Do it. Cause we've just been traveling so much when we get back from this tour that we're currently on. Yeah. a real yeah and take a real vacation yeah where are you gonna what do you want to do oh you want to go to vienna venice somewhere well i do want to go to venice italy somewhere with a v victorville victorville that's the one there it is virginia no actually virginia is probably really beautiful virginia's for lovers it is um i want to go to yes i want to go to venice italy um before it is submerged underwater do it um yeah i like italy i like italy hey speaking of victorville kelly wants to know what's your least part what's your least favorite part about southern california god kelly uh thank you for letting me letting me um let me just open up my book here get up on your box my least favorite part of southern california is the fact that i there are so many and this was not where i i think there's more people like this up north now but it used to be very southern california thing when i moved here in the 90s mothers wearing their daughter's jeans with fucking facelifts trying to act like they too are also still in high school i find that and it happens a ton in the san fernando valley i find it to be heart-wrenchingly uh horrifying like i find those women yeah it's depressing it's like they want to go back they're they're like kind of using their daughter in this weird creepy puppet master way where it's like do you want to wear this and they're it's just it's so much the ones who are like we get confused for sisters all the time like no you fucking don't no you fucking don't a and b how about you step back you've already had your fucking 48 years step back and let mckenzie step forward for five fucking seconds like that thing is so sick down here my mom's my best friend oh my mom's my best friend i used to do this in my act but i had a joke where i said to my mom i was trying to buy her money from her so i told her she was my best friend and she goes well you're not my best friend she really said that to me wow yeah you know why because she's my mom exactly not my best friend yeah i'm supposed to have best friends that are my age and my mom has best friends that are her age and you don't have to wear the same clothes because you're not even in the same realm of life yeah give it a fucking break this question was for you thank you for finally asking me that question what's your answer i don't care you're from here yeah so maybe what's your um pollution air quality such a hippie such a gemini traffic the traffic and the people i guess the landscape and the human beings uh the the dis the dis the disparate never mind the disparate life experiences yeah amy asked who comes up with the titles for the episodes that's a great question nice one steven why don't you answer this one yes tell us your steven tell us your um your process in my notebook yes um i uh write down things that i find funny and interesting while we're while we're talking yes while you're talking not just random thoughts you have just like a diary while you guys are during the episode and then yeah i just throw it back your way and we just narrow it down to something that we just makes us laugh i think let's read from last night yes this text who sent us so we recorded episode what was the one that was just posted today 119 so 119 but it'll be one you know whatever so last night you left so much stuff goes on in these texts um and then you text us uh options at 11 p.m when we were both at that bar last night yeah georgia walks up to me um mid-party and goes like sorry real quick oh yeah can i excuse me miss kilgar she said important and i said away and then she said no no we have to answer this question so here's a text from steven hey here are some title ideas for this week's episode um episode 119 fingers everywhere which is what we ended up picking yeah fingers everywhere but there was also sally holes power day day raccoon corn style and reasonable face well and it's i feel like my favorite thing when i first started listening to podcasts and people would be like what's the title after something that was said in the episode it was so there was like an elation of like when the person finally said it it was so fucking cool because you don't know what it's in reference yeah yeah i like that i do too and when we started we were trying to do those puns that were very fun until we got into the 30s and then i realized it was just going to be the same numbers with a three in front of it or yes i feel like we should go back and rename some of those rename those first episodes never okay great no it's too late it's like it's already in the ethernet it's already in the ethernet it's already in the ether we can't i just like sometimes i'll see that and i'll be like what what does that even mean like an episode what is it like 2020 when it's like what that's not episode 2020 why did we name it that i know what i love is people they'll go like i just listening to project artichoke and i was just like i don't know what you're talking about that one took me a while i totally forgot that's what we named it and people are being serious about something else we're talking about but they're using the title i love it like we're like oh it's very it's a very fun process let's just say that uh that was you yeah okay if someone made it karen alicia wants to know if someone made a movie about your lives for some reason who would you want to play you well of course francis mcdormand oh you don't look like her i don't care okay i mean does it have to be matchy matchy i guess not it could be whoever the twins to play me i wouldn't be so complicated that it takes in gemini that it takes twins to fucking play me you know what that's cool actually very like charlie kaufman artistic yeah and cinematic like we couldn't get one actress to encapsulate all her depth and fucking interesting shit no way and the like the just the reverberations of her belches so we had to have two actresses belch at the same time yeah um yeah that's good okay how about you charlie kaufman uh yeah charlie kaufman to play you i think um charlie brown that was my niece's she used to call like um you know merry christmas charlie brown or whatever this charlie brown peanut specials my sister used to play them for us for her for us i was there too but although the time and so she'd look she was like two years old and she'd look and be like charlie brown it's like the only thing she could say but it was her way of saying like do you want to watch it again and then the first baby doll my sister ever bought her that like one of those dolls that looked like a real baby my she pulled it out of the box and she's staring at holding it and smiling and my sister goes what are you gonna name her she goes charlie brown because it's a little bald round-headed baby and we were like you're the smartest child the way she can uh put these things together the way she calls every single thing she sees charlie brown what's the scariest bug georgia this is from becca the scariest bug uh is a anything that's not supposed to fly that flies like a flying spider why is it flying it's a spider you know what i mean or like a fucking flying roach it's supposed to be a fucking cockroach why is it flying i came home last night real time last night to us our real time and in the tv room frank was not paying attention to the food that i had he was like wagging his tail which he almost never does and doing something in the corner and i was like there's a bug over there yeah and it turned out to be one of these cockroaches that's like the big black like big fucking little beetle yes that but they're they're brown brown right but with wings and but like but like shelly they're like they're like water bugs almost and frank was had half eaten and it was what is he wagging his fucking tail for because he thinks it's fun it's like a little monster that he's caught oh my god well i still have that box of moths on the fucking that i haven't moved on the fucking balcony from the cats are you just gonna brick over that balcony and never go out there again that's a good i mean look listen oh uh give me the other page where's the other page steven has it would either of you john wants to know would either of you go in a hot air balloon no no i you know what's weird i want to go to a hot air balloon festival get up at dawn and watch them all take off like in those slideshows that my father sends me through email constantly those forwarded emails do they have like uh uplifting quotes in cursive on them you can do it yeah um but i would love to see that in real life like see watch them get blown up and take take off can there be like can i get like can there be like an apple cider festival going on too because i want snacks if i'm gonna wake up that early and go look at a thing that i'm not part of okay i want snacks great so we'll do this will be like a september thing that we'll do yeah so it'll be kind of like autumnal autumnal what if we do it at the circleville pumpkin show um uh what was the question it's just about hot air balloons here's my answer no because margaret cho yeah was in a hot air balloon crash shut up and the last time i did a i did a show she was on it and she told the story and i could not stop laughing she like like it people got seriously hurt because a wind kicked up yeah no and her hot air balloon crashed okay i just don't none of this i just don't know what to do i just don't know what to do don't do this don't do it don't go up there don't go up there but for a little while and this is very fascinating for a little while people thought like in the whatever 1700s or i don't know probably 1600s people thought hot air balloons actually it's the 1500s maybe it was 1400s people thought hot air balloons Air balloons were the way everyone was going to travel. Right. Have you ever seen those, like, postcards, illustrations of, like. Right. People thought that that was going to be, like, the new superhighway or whatever. Idiots. Fucking fools. Stupid heads. We did that one. Hi, Elvis. Okay, Sue asks us this. She says, stupid icebreaker type question. But if you'd only bring five things with you to a desert island, five things, what would they be? I'm going to count them off while you say what they are. Elvis. Yes. Vince. Do you like that Vince is second? Don't tell him. Mimi. Dottie. One thing left. Ah, shit. A fucking hammock. And then you all get into that hammock together. And die. As a family. And starve to death. I would have to bring. The very first thing is tweezers. Fucking. Is it because the sun's going to, like, be great and you're going to actually be able to see the sun? You're going to be able to see those. Yeah. hairs? That and I will fully look like Tom Hanks in Castaway if I don't bring tweezers. Okay. In six months, they'll come and rescue me and be like, this man has a goatee. Did you meet Karen? We don't need her. So I would say tweezers. A mirror. You'll need a mirror if you need a tweezer. Oh, yeah. That's right. A mirror. My earbuds. If they were connected to something. Okay. And you might as well bring alcohol if you're going to be on a fucking deserted island. Oh, my God. Thank you. You're welcome. How about a crate of rum? Uh-huh. Ugh. Then I just start saying a Pirates of the Caribbean movie plot line. I bury the rum. No one knows it's there. I'm drunk. Eyeliner. Black eyeliner. Uh-huh. And big boots like Jack Sparrow. Yeah. Perfect. Perfect. Let's see. Let's see. Let's see. I'm going to read the longest one. I don't know what it says. Okay. It actually says, Has reading slash covering a specific story made you change your behavior? For example, I compulsively lock my car after I get out thanks to a campus alert I received while in college about a man climbing into unlocked cars and waiting until people had driven off campus to sit up and carjack them. Yep. That's a horrifying story. I think that I was already paranoid to begin with, but I guess I've just gotten paranoid-er. Yeah. You know? Well, you know the thing? Like, we were talking about this. We were talking about this the other night, but I think I'm just suspicious of people who seem like they've got, like, there's nothing going on. Like, there's people who are, like, in a good mood all the time, like, positive and upbeat or whatever. I'm just like, you're not fucking fooling me. Oh, so yeah, you think people are hiding shit more now. The more even keel and, like, well-adjusted you seem to be to me, because I don't believe people are really like that. So you must think I'm crazy, then. No, I think, no, I think you're the safest person. I think you're the safest person there could be on this planet. Thank you. No, it just, the veneer, like, what's this big veneer for? Like, the people, the people that are like, well, I do my CrossFit every morning, and then I fucking do this, and I do that, and there's no outer show that you are hurt, broken, affected, or whatever, where it's like, oh, are you a sociopath, and you're just like. So people who won't show any vulnerability. Yeah, people who just, they've, like, the outer presence of, like, the outer presence is perfection, I'm just, I don't buy it. Yeah. I like that. Okay, you go. Wait, did you answer? No. Oh, okay. I agree. Okay, how about this one? Rachel asks, if you could have been a fly on the wall in a police station for any past murder investigation, which investigation would you choose and why? That's good. Well, of course, I want to say East Area Rapist right off the bat. I think more so than the investigation, I want to be a fly on the wall. I want to be a fly on the wall for an interrogation. Yes. Like, to me, that sounds so fun, and, like, when I watch them, I watch them on, you know, true crime shows, I am obsessed with that part, and I want to watch the whole fucking thing. Yeah. So, I bet it was so fun to fucking interrogate Golden State Killer. Yeah, I mean, I would absolutely, I know that's very, like, of the moment, but it really is just, I want to know everything that's going on, and it drives me crazy. Yeah. That we don't get a direct line of, like, well, this happened yesterday, and this is this. I think I would also love, actually, Burke Ramsey's childhood, child psychologist interrogation. Nice one. That's, like, there's a little bit of footage we can watch, but I want to fucking listen in on all of it. And I also want to be seated next to a child psychologist who can tell me what's going on and why. Yes. Like, he's saying this because of this. That is a bad psychology. right there like all that cranny yes crazy shit yeah yeah where there's things that are indicators that you wouldn't necessarily know unless you're a real expert i think that's also why i really really did love mind hunter so much because any other thing that you could pick apart or have a complaint with because that's all anyone does anymore is pick things apart but i found it so satisfying that there was that moment where he was sitting there just having a chat with ed kemper and there was nothing in you that didn't totally believe that was ed kemper that and that's really what it is where i'm not i don't like the celebrity of serial killers or whatever but i am fascinated with what happens when a brain goes and when someone just is following their own crazy logic yeah to that degree yeah but they can actually tell you about it right but that's exactly the way i'd want to do it where it's not really the real person yeah and it's yeah you know that um our our ed kemper our actor friend our boy ed kemper ed kemper he's in uh barry yes tv show which is so exciting he's in it and the yellow king from the first season of the true detective right that guy's an incredible actor so good that show the fucking the guy who plays the bald-headed the shaved-headed uh gangster oh my god i love him so much he's such a fascinating faced person yeah but that yellow king man when he shows up anywhere because he was that he's been all these things where every time he shows up you're like hold on i know that face i didn't know vince knew he had to show me a photo from that show to be like remember i i didn't remember that's the thing where it's like i wish people would save their sick saying people are genius actors or whatever for shit like that where it's like have they ever made you truly believe they were an entirely different person because that's good acting so good should we do one more sure i'm going yeah i think we can wrap this down yeah if you could be on a jury sheila says open back stairs are the most terrifying things ever right um open back stairs yeah like i think like my stairs right here where like someone can grab your ankle oh oh on the ground i was like aren't they all open bags you mean like a slide that's covered how would it not be open back um oh so like almost like 70s modern stairs yeah uh yeah i got sure how about i'm not rich to know in which era of u.s history do you think it would be easiest to get away with a murder i mean wild west right yeah or anytime i'm always shocked at any time that they solve a murder like before the 1930s yeah i mean it was amazing how it was just like the murder this the crime scene would get discovered and immediately 17 reporters would be standing in the blood and they would be chain smoking in it yeah and like spitting gum into i mean it's so crazy um i wonder what your answer would be to this because i this might not be a good area but in case you do have an answer julie asks what are your favorite fictional crime shows oh fictional i did like cold case uh case the one with the blonde girl yeah with all the hair yeah i don't watch that many of those they're just not my thing but of course law and order is just like fucking epic and amazing so good what's yours i like killing eve is out right now and i like that a lot oh yeah i heard that's good it's really sandra oh it's such a fucking badass someone said i think it's emily nussbaum who is a reporter for i think the new york times but i follow her on twitter and she was like she was raving about that show yeah she was like i love it it's making me so happy yeah it's good um i mean i definitely love that show it's a good show it's a good show it's a good show i love it it's a good show it's a good show it's a good show it's a good show it's a good show it's a good show it's a good show it's a good show it's a good show it's a good show it's a good show it's a good show i would go and have these i mean horrific nights of just terrible eating it in like one-nighters and terrible bars and like just bad shit where i was like i didn't want to be there they didn't want me there everything about it was like not fun which i lost the point entirely of like this is what you're supposed to be just having fun with people right but it was awful and then i would go back to my hotel room and just lock the door turn the lights off turn the tv on get room service and watch law and order and it was like taking a hot bath it was my hot bath yeah and i it began to then it i realized it was on all the time and everywhere and i could have that hot bath feeling whenever i wanted yeah and sam waterston is the og like something about that guy yeah i like i love the the subtle storyline that he's kind of always fucking the female da that works with him there's there's always some weird like they're not overt but like one time they'll say one thing yeah how he's having an affair with this person except not Angie Harmon. She was way too hot for Sam Waterstones. I love it. That's good. Okay, we are back and we're here to talk escape rooms. I think it's really important to give people an honest escape room update. It's now 2026. This was recorded in 2018. You've had all this time. Have you gone to an escape room? We've given you so much fucking time. Eight years. I'm sorry. I've been busy protesting and fucking fighting the man. So if you could. No, I have not. Have you? Me either. No, no, I can't. I think over the years, even the curiosity has waned. And now I don't care how they work and I don't care the kind of fun you could get up to inside. And it may. It makes me simply tired and or anxious to think about being inside one. Yeah, like I can't hang out in a red light therapy fucking machine for 10 minutes. How am I going to go in a room that's locked? And that's not even good for me. That's right. I'm not getting anything out of this, but feeling stupid. Yeah, you would feel stupid. Would you go though, if it were red light therapy all in the room as you were trying to solve? Actually, yes. That would be a really great way to get me to do something. Yeah, now we're getting things done. Now we're, what do you call it? Multitasking. College now has red light therapy in all of its classes. Oh, well. If there's serums, as you solve every clue, you get another serum to layer on your skin. So I would do it for that. Are corn pops still, the people want to know, are corn pops still your favorite cereal? Yes, although I will say this. And I am so screwed up right now from jet lag that I don't know. You yawned. And I said to myself, I don't think I've actually ever seen you yawn. Like, I know you're tired, but I'm like, you know, you've been tired. I don't think I've ever seen you yawn. You know what it is? Because I normally I'm a professional. I save it for my private time. But I'm in that I'm in like a weird zone where I don't know what time of day it is and what's going on. But I today I was like, I'm hungry. Like there was nothing I could do about it. And then I just ate like three bowls of cereal in a row. And it was nice. Raisin bran. Brunch. And it was so good. Okay. Yeah. Is that just me? In a weird spot? Maybe. It's good. It's close to what mine is. Raisin nut bran. Oh, you know, I think I told you recently they make peanut butter checks now too. Yeah. You did tell me that. And I forgot. Maybe that's what we need. That's all I talk about these days. What if we, what if we have a fan cult video where you just eat cereal really loud and it'll be my sister's nightmare. Out of giant bowls with giant spoons. Okay. And be like, it's good. It's good. I do like it. It's good. Any other updates? When's the last time you've been to Tam O'Shanter? Oh, it's been a while. Like what's the point of going if I can't have a martini? You can feel the old alcoholism in the wood in that place. Like the bartenders are like leading their AA meetings for sure. You know what? The reason to do it though is that beautiful, freshly roasted turkey. Because it's hard to get your hands on these days. But they don't have the carving station anymore. Do you know that? No. Why? Yeah. Post pandemic. They just don't do that anymore. I need to see them cut that turkey. Totally. And then, no, I think we'd go now because like we were talking about going for Christmas and then Vince wants to go to the smokehouse instead. Oh, yeah. That's a little bit more of a, it's, there's more action at the smokehouse. Yeah. But I do love a seat at the bar at the Tam O'Shanter with a fucking cold ass martini. Yeah. Man. And some corned beef. Yeah. It sounds like you used to be like an executive from Xerox where you're just like, you know, get that cold beef at one o'clock in the afternoon. Those were the days. Six martinis and drive home. That used to be how it worked. Oh, God. Okay. Francis McDormand and the Olsen twins. Pretty great. The Olsen twins is such a good answer for who's going to play you. I could not in a million years have guessed that I said that. Like not in a million years. So funny. There is a, there is a part of this and it took me a really long time to realize it. We just have old conversations recorded. Like that's a really funny thing. I'm just like ourselves from 10 years ago. Totally. Totally. All right. Well, let's get into listener questions for Steven. Oh, I love this. Oh, I love this. Oh, I love this. Here's the month when being scared is supposed to be fun. Sure. Your actual house? Absolutely not. I recently got an alert from my camera outside that there is like someone prowling around late at night. And of course I got freaked out. I opened my camera and it was a big spider dangling in front of the camera. And I loved it. I love that I know that it works. Like it's so much better a spider than an actual person, but I'll be prepared. Right now save 60% off with professional monitoring when you visit SimpliSafe.com slash fave. That's SimpliSafe.com slash f-a-v. It lets them know that we sent you and it really helps support the show. Goodbye. We've all had moments where dealing with healthcare or insurance feels completely overwhelming. You're sick, worried about someone you love, trying to understand what comes next, and suddenly you're spending hours on hold filling out paperwork and trying to figure out who to call. Research shows patients spend the equivalent of an eight-hour workday every month coordinating their own care. Nobody hands you a roadmap when you're dealing with a diagnosis or ongoing health issues. That's why there's Solace Health. Solace provides personal healthcare advocates who average 16% years of healthcare experience and can help you get answers fast. Think of them as someone in your corner who understands the healthcare system and can handle the logistics while you focus on your health. They can help with appointments, insurance denials, medical bills, treatment options, and understanding doctor recommendations. Research shows 92% of patients report a positive impact on their care from working with an advocate. Advocacy improves outcomes and Solace advocates are covered by insurance nationwide. Eligibility varies by insurance plan. Advocates do not provide medical or legal advice, or services must be 18 years or older. Go to solacehealth.com slash murder to see if you qualify. It takes about two minutes and it's covered by insurance. That's S-O-L-A-C-E health.com slash murder. Goodbye. You know a favorite M word? Magnesium. Like the kind that's in Dr. Teal's magnesium spray. Made from a proprietary blend of topical minerals, powered by pure Epsom salt and natural Dead Sea salt, it's designed to help you relax and get in the right state of mind for a good night's rest. If you need a reset after a crisis, make Dr. Teal's magnesium spray part of your nighttime routine. It's an effortless way to get a boost of topical magnesium that can help you relax your body and mind before bedtime. Dr. Teal's magnesium spray comes in a lightweight, fast-drying formula. Just shake it up and generously spritz onto the soles of your feet and massage until absorbed. I was kind of blown away the first time I used this spray because I do have problems sleeping. And when there's something this simple, you just spray it on your feet and suddenly you're asleep and the next morning you're like, wait, what happened? Did my problem just get solved? Like, it actually is that easy. And your stinky feet now smell like lavender. Like, what more do you want? How dare you call my feet stinky? For wellness, you can feel fine Dr. Teal's magnesium spray online or in your local bath aisle. Goodbye. Do you think we've done it? I think we did it. Was that long enough? It was about an hour. Well, sorry. That's about an hour. All right. It was long enough that Steven's voice shut down. Steven lost his voice. Should we ask Steven a couple questions? Yes. Here, let me ask you a couple questions. Let me find one. Steven, pen or pencil? Uh-oh. Let me ask you who that's from. Tell you. Brianna wants to know, do you prefer using pen or pencil? Pen. Okay. Good one, Brianna. Okay, wait. Just because I write weird and so I smudge. Oh, with the side of your hand? Yeah. What about Steven? Steven! Steven, Kate wants to know what your death row meal, your death sentence meal would be. Oh, that's a good one. Let's all do it. Let's all say ours. Okay. Because I feel like it's guilty pleasure, right? Yeah. You don't need to go out on a high note. I feel like- It's your last anything you get to eat on this planet. Comfort food. Anything that makes you happy. I think I already said mine is cheese plate, corn dogs, and devil's egg. You're sticking with your Cleveland meal? Sticking with it and champagne. Kraft macaroni and cheese. Yes. With hot dogs. Yes. Pepper on top and ketchup. Nice. That sounds disgusting. Just that one entree? Yeah, just that. Just like a big bowl. Almost like a mac and cheese hot dog casserole. Yeah. Like the whole box of Kraft. Like not just half of it. Yeah. Not a scoop. You're not splitting. It's not splitsy. You get all of it. And you put pepper, like ground pepper on top of it? Yeah, yeah. Over the- So it's got a nice little- That sounds disgusting and I want it immediately. And what kind of hot sauce? Oh, no. Just straight up ketchup. Just straight up Heinz ketchup. Like mixed in it? With macaroni and cheese. Stephen, were you an abandoned in a children's cafeteria yet? No, my God. You were eight years old. You want a high C with that? It just reminds me of like, it just reminds me of when my mom was like, I don't- want to cook i've been working nine to five and i have to pick you up from daycare and like i'm just gonna throw that craft in the in the thing you heat it for like five minutes it feels like yes delicious mix it with the cheese fucking love it like they never go in and we eat it's just like they eat it all hot dogs for protein ish yeah an extra sodium hot dogs for nitrates uh then if we're doing if we're doing childhood loves then i want i want to change mine to corn meal pancakes for dinner oh and who did that janet or marty janet pancakes for dinner we like didn't know we were poor it's like the most exciting thing yeah that's fun time yeah what's yours karen well if we're gonna do childhood then it's overcooked chicken breast oh because my mother always was like oh oh pull that chicken out of the oven she was like always forgot it was in there so overcooked chicken breast minute rice and uh frozen corn that's been in there for like a year and a half and then i'm like oh my god i'm gonna do that and then i'm like oh my god i'm gonna do that and then i'm like oh my god i'm gonna do that and then just like steven's saying i think the seasoning is kind of key because that's when all the food my mom made was so bland that you'd be like no you know what i will try some pepper like i know i'm only 10 but let's get some pepper but lowry's seasoning salt is actually great look at onion salt we could use okay what about stouffer's french bread pizzas then can we go there my parents wouldn't buy shit like that well i eat it as an adult though oh then yes we can go okay i feel like uh vince made us one of those one time after we were recording for a long time no that was like a tombstone something or other it was good it was fucking good like coming downstairs and i think this is the other thing because we this got pulled out of the equation kind of early where my mom would be like well make it yourself she was the queen of make it yourself so anytime someone's like i whipped up this thing for you i like oh i just the concept of it makes me like oh this is the best thing ever so even when you're dating someone they're like let me make you dinner never fucking i can't remember one person that cooked that i know are you serious i just gave steven a look of like steven we need to help her i just in this q a show alone i realized that i have a bad picker i just can't pick them at all all right well steven and i are gonna pick someone for you it's just because i always date bodybuilders oh stop it you're complaining about people who don't want dessert and then you're dating a bodybuilder i'm not i'm totally joking okay like i'm trying to figure out why the fuck oh i get it what what am i what am i doing boil a fucking chicken breast for you i mean one would hope some rice pilaf and a bunch of broccoli rice pilaf and broccoli and what about that rice pilaf that has the weird almonds in it we're like are these almonds man-made dude i love that shit they're good i'm hungry should we get food yeah all right let's do it okay okay we're back i don't know why that was so funny i don't know why that was so funny i don't know why that was so funny okay you went okay okay i don't know why um all right should we should we wrap things up um clomp everywhere is just great that's i love the word clomp clomp is perfect i love the fact that we talked about death row meals for so long in this conversation inappropriate it well but but this is a like icebreaker conversation that people have and we will not be going down for that because that's what everyone talks about all right but if we were naming this episode today based on some of the shit we said hard to beat clomp everywhere but we could do the clock is aliens which was very high concept for this episode thank you um we could do so much cuteness available yeah that uh of course the staunchest paleoist a lot of good ones in this and then of course both olsen twins both olsen twins i think is the the clear second place to clomp everywhere do you think that an olsen twin has ever listened to an episode of this podcast god i'd be honored i know me too such legends and just passionate smokers pros legends smokers what more do you want they've seen it all they've done it all well and a perfect ending for this episode of this week's episode of rewind let's see what we can do with it thanks for listening to this weird q a we'll be back home in the us of a next week we'll be back on brand um when our big tour is over that's right so thanks for listening stay sexy and don't get murdered goodbye hey elvis you want a cookie he's like you guys have been making me hungry this whole time calling all amateur detectives and podcast obsessives virgin voyage's second true crime voyage sets the stage for a new era of crime and crime and crime and crime sale march 20th 2027 for a five-night escape to grand turk and the beach club at bimini as part of the on-air at sea collection this immersive sailing brings together fan favorite podcasts including disgraced land buried bones and wisecrack for live recordings behind the scenes access exclusive meet and greets and crime themed programming that you won't find anywhere else all aboard our award-winning kid-free ships head over to virgin voyages.com true crime to secure your spot goodbye i'm lacey mosley author actor stand-up comedian creator and host of scam goddess podcast the true crime comedy podcast all about robbery fraud and those who practice it each week i bring on an amazing guest oh i scammed them what i could talk to you for an hour you're a generational yapper like me that's why i had to make yapping a job and now you can catch full episodes of my show on youtube start listening to scam goddess on the iheart radio app apple podcast or wherever you get your podcast - Peace.