Religious Experiences - Strengths and Weaknesses

You are listening to I Am Refocused Radio with your host, Shemaya Reed. This show is designed to inspire you to live your purpose and regain your focus. And now, here's your host, Shemaya Reed. Welcome back to I Am Refocused Radio once again. We are here today in just like any other time we have another amazing show running for you all today today. This time we are talking to a special guest, a compelling storyteller, a speaker, and he is also a podcast host himself. He has a show when you look, we're talking to the one only Mick Wineholdt. He is going to share with us his amazing stories. He has two powerful turning points, if you will. And we're going to get deeper into that with his personal story. But I just want to rush to the quick to the chase, if you will, and bring him on the show. Because I could spend another five minutes on his details on his bio. And just welcome, first of all, Mick, thank you for being on the show today. How are you doing, man? Oh, Shemaya, I'm doing great, man. Thanks a bunch for having me on. Yes, sir. I said it in the beginning. You have two really impactful turning points in your life that comes from deep grief. But it also gives you a renewed hope and inspiration. So for our audience, explain the two stories in your life that made you in having some deep grief in your life. Yeah, man. So I'll take everybody back to November 7th of 2000 for the first story in this episode. And for most of us, that won't mean anything until I say it was the day of the hanging chat. So some listeners out there will remember that Al Gore, George W. Bush, it's National Election Day. And it's the day of the hanging chat, which was just otherwise a regular old Tuesday. And for me, I was 19 years old. I'm originally from Baltimore. And I'd been living in the greater Denver and Boulder area of Colorado for about a year. And Shemaya, I'm just completely fueled by ego and by Mountain Dew. And so I decided that I'm going to go climb, not hike, but I'm going to go climb a 14,000 foot peak. And so I decided that I was going to go climb Graze Peak, which is one of the closer peaks to Denver. And I was intent on climbing up this snow gully or a snow cool or as they call them. I think of it as just sort of like the shoot at the top of a ski resort that, you know, the best skiers would ski down essentially. Okay, so I'm climbing up this narrow shoot of snow. And I'm about two or 300 vertical feet up this actual climb, which puts me right around 13,000 feet. And because it's early season, meaning it's November, it's not yet even winter officially, of course. There's snow everywhere. And that's what I'm climbing. But the snow has an accumulated enough over the months of winter conditions for the snow to be stable. And so as I'm ascending it, I end up disturbing the snow too much. And I literally trigger an avalanche. And I can distinctly remember hearing the warmth of sound that sort of lets you know that all of the snow is settling. And then I looked up and I could see the fracture line. And I could immediately see the snow coming towards me. And so I did my best with my, you know, ego and my logic to outrun this thing. And so I turned to my left with the intention of being able to kind of move perpendicular to the sliding snow. And I got one step to my left and I was swept off my feet. And as I was swept off my feet, I literally remember thinking to myself, this is going to suck for my family, especially my mom. And then the lights went out. I can imagine that. I mean, I can kind of give a little fear in my mind. But I mean, kind of paint the picture for our audience. Mom is after. I mean, what was going to be it? Yeah, so I'm immediately knocked unconscious. And so at that point to your question, nothing's really going to my head, which turns out to be, I think, a wonderful blessing. So some period of a lap's time occurs and I regain consciousness. And I'm at the bottom. But now I mentioned before that I was two or three hundred vertical feet up this slope. I'm basically back down to where I was. And I'm not buried. I'm literally not buried by the snow. And despite bouncing my way down, and I'll explain my injuries in a moment, I'm not mangled in any way. Or you know what I mean? I'm not like my arm wasn't tucked under me in some weird way. And I was literally sitting on a rock. And so I sat up and kind of shook things off, you know, and then did this systems check. And it seemed like everything was a go. And that really, Shemaia became the operative word. I had this sense that I was in danger and that I needed to go. So what I did at that point was I immediately set out to get back to the trailhead parking lot, which was about three miles from the actual base of the climb. And the reason I led in with the election day and it being a Tuesday is because it's totally normal for lots and lots of people to be in the mountains, particularly up at Graze Peak on a warm weekend day. But this is middle of the week in snowy winter conditions. And so there's nobody there. And your listeners have probably figured out at this point, I'm climbing by myself. So I'm completely alone. And I hike then the 2.9, 3 miles back to the trailhead parking lot. And 30 seconds before I walked into that trailhead parking lot, a complete stranger. His name is Steve. I didn't know that at the time arrived in the parking lot. And so he says to me, as I'm walking into the parking lot, what happened to you? I very madder, factfully said, I was in an avalanche. And I walked right past him intent on getting in my Toyota pickup truck and driving myself to the hospital. Well, I make a long story short because I had suffered pretty significant trauma to my head during the avalanche. I was in no shape to even actually take my jacket off. So I literally had to ask this complete stranger to help me take my kind of like Gore-Tex, Reinge-Jack-It-Shell-Jack-It-Off. And the reason I couldn't get it off just so that everybody has some understanding of how bad things were, is that there had been so much blood that had been dripping from my mouth and my head onto my chest. And because of the cold conditions, it had actually frozen. So I couldn't literally get my zipper down through all of the junk that it frozen on the jacket. And so I had to ask this complete stranger to help me even get my jacket off. And it was at that point there were a few other pieces involved in that that I realized I need to let this guy take me to the hospital because he had been campaigning with me over a handful of moments to say, hey, you're not in good shape. Let me take you to the hospital and my ego said, no, no, no, no, no, no. And so my mouth said, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. And then I couldn't get the jacket off. And so I finally re-wanted it. Wow. That's me. Yeah. So he took me to the hospital and all the King's men basically put Humpty Dumpty back together again. But the extent of those injuries were that my skull was fractured in three places. My jaw was broken on both sides. And my scalp was split from just over top of my right eyebrow all the way to the top of my head right at the back where your head starts to curve down towards your neck. So it was like roughly an 11 inch long split in my scalp. And so Steve described, he said, when we took your jacket off and I had my hood up at that point, my hood around my face. He said, for all intents and purposes, your right ear was sitting on your right shoulder. I mean, that's that's how bad it was. So the trauma to my brain ultimately ended up resulting in bleeding on my brain and swelling of my brain. And so they did emergency brain surgery on me sometime very late the night of November 7th or very, very early in the morning of November 8th. And so I awakened in the hospital on November 8th with my vision obscured, not blurred but obscured. And the reason for that was just like we've all seen in the movies and in TV when someone has the, you know, the brain injury or the head injury or the shot in the face or something like that. I literally had goals wrapped around my head and it was the corner of my eyes that were covered in the goals that was obscuring the vision. And it was at that point that they told me, yeah, you had brain surgery last night. Wow. Yeah, that's that's one heck of a story. I mean, first of all, I mean, I'm glad you're here talking to us today. That's the first thing and to having to experience that, that is a wild thing to experience. What was the process like, by the way, this time we were just ready to watch the news online and talking to our guests today, make my whole talk to us what was in light after you started to, begin the recovery process. I mean, I get a imagine that was a very long road. Yeah, well, man, by God's grace, it turned out to be a pretty short recovery in a lot of ways or at least maybe the visible ones. So I was out of school and out of the workforce for a total of three weeks. And that was after six total days in the hospital and then I was back into the workforce. And I did my best to try to wrap my head around all of it. But I didn't have a lot of maturity as a 19 year old to really understand the gravity and kind of the depth of what had happened. Meaning, I knew that it was a miracle that I was saved. And by that, one, I wasn't buried and two, this stranger named Steve is just there. So I gave God, and I had no relationship with God. In fact, I was at a point in my life where I very much hated God, wanted to be at the greatest possible distance away from God as I could be. But I still gave him intellectual credit that it was just this miracle because I really did not understand much more beyond that. And my mother at certain points over the years subsequent, she would say to me, you know, God saves you for a reason why was that? And I just didn't even have a response for that either later, even later in life. Now, subsequently, I have, which has been great, but it really ultimately was another dozen years after this, that I entered into a relationship with God. And that was as the result of kind of the second scenario that we were planning to talk through. I mean, yeah, I know this story. I'm sure we'll get into, but later in life, you know, it's time for family to tell us about that process. And also, I can imagine a career or, you know, a job that you were working at. So kind of picked a picture, was going on later in life. Yeah, thanks. Well, so we were 19 in our initial story here. And so everybody should fast forward 12 years now. This is late 2010 into the beginning of 2011. And I'm now 30 and 31 years old. And exactly as you were saying, you know, I was climbing the corporate ladder. My wife and I had now been married for a handful of years. We've been married without children. And I am still Shemaia fueled by ego. And in this case, because I make a few more bucks and I'm not the super broke college kid that I was before. It's now red bull as my drink of choice, not an album. And so we decide that we're going to get pregnant and start a family. And I say it that way because we thought it was our decision, you know what I mean? And again, that's the ego. So we were blessed, even though we would have never used that word then. We were blessed to get pregnant immediately. And we know plenty of families and folks that don't have that blessing. We got pregnant. Everything seemed to be going really, really, really well with the pregnancy. And a week before our baby is due and we were due with a son, I come back from walking our dogs. My wife is standing in the kitchen and she's crying. And I said, "Hey, honey, what's up?" And she says, "I haven't felt him move since last night." So we go to labor and delivery at the hospital that we were scheduled to deliver at. They moved us into not a normal delivery room, but this smaller side room. And the ultrasound text began to check for a heartbeat. First one couldn't find one. Second tech, second machine can't find one. And then they bring in the MD to basically attempt to work his magic. But we knew ultimately what he was about to tell us. And then he ended up saying, "I'm sorry to tell you this, but your baby no longer has a heartbeat." So here we are. This is the beginning of 2012. This is January 4th of 2012. We're exactly one week from our son's due date, which means he's full term. He's 39 weeks gestationally. And we find out that he has died in utero. And so my wife is induced. And the following day, because it takes a number of hours for all of that induction medicine to begin its process. And then you have labor and all of that. So the following day, my wife delivers a six pound eight ounce, 21 inch long dead baby, our son named Luke. But it was ultimately Shemaya at the moment when we found out that Luke was dead. That I grappled with and was really confronted with something I had never encountered in my entire life. And what I mean by that is, is up to that point as a 31 year old, I had been very much a capable person. Successful in the workforce and able to overcome challenges there, a capable athlete. And everything that we did around the home or with a car repair almost always, I took care of that with a little bit of help maybe from a friend or a DIY type of video. And my point in all of this was that up to that point in life, I had this belief, this perception, ultimately a misunderstanding. That I was capable of overcoming anything. And what ended up happening is, here I was confronted with the reality knowing I cannot fix a dead baby. And so as a result of that, I knew it was beyond me. And that God that I talked about earlier that I hated and wanted nothing to do with. I cried out to Him, literally on my knees. And I was on my knees, not in a position of spiritual surrender. I was on my knees, literally on the hospital floor from the weight, the physical weight of the emotion of the grief, of finding out that our son was dead. And so I cried out, and I said, "I need you." And He met me there. And what He ended up showing us, Shemaah, us meaning my wife as well, was that what we thought was a Luke-shaped hole in our hearts, meaning our son's name. We thought there was this Luke-shaped hole. And through the grief and the way God healed us, through the grief, He showed us, you didn't have a Luke-shaped hole. You had a God-shaped hole in your heart. And so it's been amazing how over the last 14 years, but He has loved us and guided our lives into all kinds of amazing things. And then later redeemed Luke's death. Well, once again, well, the LeSanri Focus already, we know we always have super-heavy stories like that, but man, that's pretty heavy. You LeSanri Focus already watching us online. So I can try to get today Mike Weinbo, I'm skipping Weinhoek's, when you think about, I mean, you have a podcast show on, I mean, let's talk about that real quick before we sign off, because time is like ice on hot stuff. It's your host of the podcast, so when you look, anything in these situations that you experience in life inspire you to say, you know, I need to do something special, like a special project. And so how will you inspire to launch your own show? Yeah, thanks for the opportunity just to chat a bit about that. So at the beginning of 2025, I was moving from one company to another. I was a career guy, sales guy, SVP of sales. And the transition from company A to company B completely imploded. And it was crystal clear to my wife and I that this was God that was doing this because all of that stuff, especially at those higher levels is reviewed by one legal team after another. And we knew that this was God. So I went into a fast and I'd never fasted for any spiritual reason before I'd done plenty of fasting for health purposes, but never spiritual fast. And I went into a three day fast and on the third day of that fast God told me to not look for work, which is of course totally countercultural. And he told me to focus on when you look, which had really been a bit of in the mix in the idea stage for varying degrees, but as long back is 2020. And so he said, this is what I want you to do. And so that was launched and we've recorded more than a hundred episodes and their ordinary people sharing a first hand extraordinary experience. And then we let the listener decide, hey, was that crazy thing that this person showed? was that coincidence or was that God? And what is incredible is the amazing aspects of the stories. I mean, you know, we got a guy here who is a, we'll call him a professional partier. Lives in Vegas has been there for years. Knows how to do everything, okay? In terms of drugs, alcohol, etc. He's in the midst of his third OD. And he just simply wants to die because he's been convulsing on his living room floor right on the strip in his condo for three straight days. And his hope is that he will die. And he cries out and says the name of Jesus. And is instantly delivered from the convulsions. And moments after that is able to stand up and essentially is sober. And it's like one type of incredible story after another where someone could say, "Hey, that was coincidence." And others could say that was miraculous. And we hold space for both of those, you know, sort of decisions and beliefs based on what people have heard. It's pretty wild. Man, this whole interview was pretty wild. We say the least. Liz Arvifold is ready to watch an asshole line talking to our guests today. Nick Winehold, you go to his website when you look.com. Again, that's when you look.com. Man, Nick, I'm telling you, I can't believe this show is almost over. But someone who's watching, listening us right now, let's just face it, everyone faces their own personal battles, right? We can't, you know, just, you know, who has the worst than whoever, because there's one story unique and situation is unique. If someone feels like they're just overwhelmed with life right now, I mean, man, all they got to do is look at your story and say, "Man, this guy can have a smile on his face on a podcast show." Ready or show? Then what am I talking about? What would you say to them that helps you personally? We used going through these hard seasons in your life. You could easily be inside and mad and complaining, but you're here. You doing great things. What kept you more of a bit? Yeah. Well, man, thanks a bunch for asking it that way, because I'll just speak for my personal experience. I have been through some really, really, desperately low spots, desperately low spots, and they may look a tiny bit different than the person that's listening, but low is low. Rock bottom is rock bottom. And what I found from my own experience was even this God that I didn't know and frankly hated for a lot of my life. When I got to my rock bottom, I cried out to that person. I cried out to that being, and that God met me. And what I experienced then was a desire to just dump my heart out to that person. What I mean by that was I was angry with God. I was sad with God. I've been happy with God. And even in my, like, my whitest heart, like firing rage, because I'm just so pissed at God as I've dumped my heart out to him, he's handled every bit of it, and he's loved me in that process. So from my experience, I would encourage anybody that is in that spot today to cry out, let him have it, dump the truck, open up your heart, shout out 'em, and if you need to use four letter words, he can handle it. That's been my experience. People don't really understand what other people go through unless they look at a little chapter one or a little demo teaser of their movie, the live movie, and just hear it from you. Share with us today, man. You are definitely a strong unit being one. And I know you, I'm not gonna speak for you, I'll let you speak, but I can imagine this being has some to do with your faith. And let's touch on that before we sign off. How have you been able to rely on your faith if that's the case to be strong? Yeah, well I think the best way for me to answer that is that my faith has grown over the years, and it's grown because I've just had more time with God and more experience in the relationship with him. And then there's one other element that's really tangible, and so I offer this up as encouragement. I began to recall all of the times in my life that God was really present, or that He did something that was very tangible. And we began to capture those, and we actually put a wall up in our house called the Miracle Wall. And it's just got a bunch of pushpins on it, and it's just simple things like this prayer was answered, this thing happened, and the reason why we did that was it became visible. It became visible to us as we would just simply walk by it as a continual reminder that, even though things are challenging, tough, bad, look at all of what we have as evidence of God seeing us through these other things, we believe He will see us through this where we're at now. We'll speak of the reminder. If you've been inspired by Nick's story, make sure you don't check out his website when you look.com. And man, I've been talking to Nick Waiho, like always, wow, he had me speechless. I didn't have to ask you too many questions because I was beaten popcorn, and watching listening to this movie that you illustrated for audience. So, like always, Nick, thank you for sharing your strength and your truth. And like always, thank you for your time. Man, Shmaya, thanks a bunch, man. You're awesome hosts, and really appreciate it.