Redefining Success: Courage, Identity & Building on Your Own Terms

Success is often measured by titles, promotions or the size of the company on your resume, but every so often someone reaches the top of all the thoughts they wanted, poses, and asks a different question. Is this still the life I want to build? Sometimes, the bravest decision isn't climbing another wrong on the ladder. It's having the courage to build your own. This is our split realities, where we explored the inner decisions that shaped the life's release. Today, we're talking about ambition, identity, courage, and what it means to create success without losing yourself along the way. Today's guest is Amara Ahmed, founder of precision consulting. It would take CRO and UX consultancy that those businesses understand not just what users do, but why they do it. Before launching our own company, Amara spends more than a decade leading teams in driving groups across some of the largest digital platforms in the menna region, including the leave review, food pander, talabat, and darras. She works across 15 countries, managed teams of over 200 people, carried P&L responsibility, and learned what it means to own outcomes, not just ideas, but behind an impressive career was a deeper realization. Time and again, she found herself in rooms where people like her, a South Asian woman, later diagnosed as neurodivergent, and often the only woman at the table were on the represented. Rather than simply accepting that reality, she chose to create a different one. Today, through precision consulting, Amara combines behavioral psychology with business strategy, so her companies build experiences that generally serve people, while also advocating for leadership that values integrity, inclusion, and meaningful impact over manipulation. Amara, it's wonderful to have your nose blend reality. Welcome to the show. Hi, thank you so much for having me. That's such a nice intro. You're welcome. Thank you so much. Yes, so you had what many people would describe as a successful corporate career? Was there a particular moment when you realized success and for few men, where we necessarily the same thing? Well, that's a good question. I think, yeah, I think towards the end of my, I would say, corporate career, I would find myself in these moments where I didn't feel like a sense of fulfillment at the end of the day, and every time I would have these conversations with other friends or colleagues around me, they'd be like, what are you on about? For somebody, your age, you're so well off financially, you're doing so well in your career, what exactly is the problem? I'm not doing enough, or I'm not being pushed enough, not bringing enough value that I could, and I just, I feel like it's not really aligned with what, you know, what I would want to do as a person. And suddenly, I realized that it's the initial vision that I had for, for what a good career in chart would look like, going into, you know, my 30s and 40s is no longer where I saw myself. Yeah, success and fulfillment, being two different things. So, I believe there are some persons who are successful, but they don't feel fulfilled. Exactly, exactly that, you know, like if I'm coming back at the end of the day, and I'm just like falling on a couch, you know, just staring at the ceiling, and I'm wondering like, okay, what did I do today? Like, what did I genuinely, like, you know, do today that made me feel like I actually added value to the world and, you know, made a difference. Yeah, true. Yeah, because fulfillment heats differently. There's this kind of on-piece that comes with it, piece with yourself when you feel fulfilled. Exactly, exactly that. Yeah. Yeah. So, you also found yourself as the only woman in leadership rooms, how it does experience this ship, both your confidence and your understanding of leadership. I think my understanding of leadership, to be honest, has, you know, really evolved and changed over the course of my career. When I first, you know, got in, you know, to corporate and I first started working, I saw leadership as, you know, something I feel like very, very different. And I think I defined it more so as what I saw around me, and that was very much driven by the sort of male leadership I think I saw around me. And I think it had less to do with that sort of EQ and, you know, service leadership qualities. And, you know, it was more, I think, authoritative leadership and more corporate level of sort of a leadership, more loud sort of a leadership. And it was kind of more leading from the front. And I do think that there is merit to that in certain moments. But I think as I've, as I've worked, you know, over the years, I have kind of developed my own sort of, you know, style and really kind of figured out what things work for me and what things, you know, I don't, what are the habits that I don't really, like, want to keep on, what don't really align with my values or what are, you know, the sort of habits that actually work better for the people around me. And I think I've realized that I'm, you know, I am much bigger supporter of service leadership. I think as people in leadership, it is our job to not be, to not think that the team works for us, but that we work, you know, for the team. The same way that we work for the team and for the people above us is the same way that we work for the team that reports to us. I think when you come into it with that sort of a narrative, the way you work with the people and to grow them and to work with them, it really changes how you approach it, how you approach their growth. And I think that really makes a difference in, in the sort of experience you're able to, to give the people around you. Absolutely. So being that knows us, a neurodivergent later in life can change the way someone understands their own story. Looking back, what suddenly meetings after receiving that diagnosis? I think for me it was, it was twofold. One, to be honest, it just personally helped me kind of, you know, be able to really give myself like, be able to kind of identify what exactly was it that was making me function a certain way, right? Before this, it was more like, I knew I functioned a certain way, but I thought it was, you know, the same way that everybody else kind of does, you know, like some, either something's broken in my brain or, you know, you're, you're a weirdo. And it's just been always that way, you know, for, for a very, very long time. And, and depending on the characteristic, you're either quirky or you're weird and, you know, based on the mood. But I think after getting that sort of like diagnosis, you, you just are able to kind of give yourself a better understanding. I think you're able to be more, I think, empathetic and just have better vocabulary for yourself. And, you know, it's even though I think for, for me, like, I started reading, you know, psychology related stuff very early as a teenager. I remember, like, I used to be super interested in this stuff. And I think a lot of people who aren't neurodivergence do start doing this. It's, it's as a way of kind of, you know, in an unconscious, subconscious way of kind of self-heating and identifying. But obviously, because you're not diagnosed and, you know, there's no professional involved, you can't really say that this is what you have. But in certain ways, you start picking, you know, certain habits and tricks and games. to find your life, to kind of make your way through. But I think once you have that sort of diagnosis, obviously there's, there's, you know, the, there's a certain level, I think, of just the world kind of giving you, you know, a little bit more permission, I would say per se, although I don't know why we need it, to be honest, but to kind of operate differently, you know? And of course, I think a lot more tools become accessible to you, like, you know, in terms of medication being more accessible, you know, therapy tools, you know, become more accessible, because obviously once you have that diagnosis, you are able to go in and get, you know, the right kind of therapy. But again, then obviously it's, you know, it's such a difficult and long route, because it takes so long to be able to, you know, diagnose and so many people go through, like, misdiagnosis and different diagnoses. It's a whole journey, of course. And I, of course, and it's still, I think, in certain ways, like, on a person level, it gives you that sort of, like, clarity. But at the same time, I think at work, it puts you in a very interesting position, I would say, because I think you already are generally, when, you know, your divergent, you are generally a little bit more empathetic, because you know that you have certain quirks, so you're generally, like, more understanding of other people's quirks. But once you have that sort of, like, you know, diagnosis, you become more empathetic for people's experiences and stuff, but I think you also become quite very of people and judgment, especially in corporate. And I think especially as a female, as, you know, somebody moving up in leadership, depending on the sort of, you know, diagnosis people have, I think it can be really, really difficult for people to be vocal or be able to share, you know, these kind of things with, you know, with their colleagues or with their workplaces, because as much as workplaces like to say, like, you know, diversity, inclusion, and all of that, our workplaces are not built that way. They're not built for inclusion. You know, they're barely built for, you know, any sort of diversity. And you are constantly operating in this sort of, like, fear of being marginalized or, you know, being thought of like, oh, you know, do we really want to bring this person in, you know, for a leadership position? 'Cause what if there's, you know, any chance of instability? So you really, I think, start working harder to kind of mask and cover up your, you know, or diverging traits. I think, for me, I noticed that that was, that was a very, very, you know, strong trait. That that, and even for people around me, I think especially in women, I would say, is something that I've noticed. And even I've heard, like, you know, a lot of their experiences. Yeah, true. Being diagnosed, in a way, like you said, it's personally, it brings about clarity. And also, you get to be more self-aware. And I hope you explained things that has been, that has been going on in your life before you were diagnosed. So it's to give you a better understanding of what you've been experiencing. Exactly, exactly. Yeah. You left the career that was already thriving to be something from scratch. Was emotions came with making that decision? And how did you know it was the right time? Oh, it's never the right time. It's absolutely never the right time is what I have realized. I waited a long time for it to be the right time. And I think when I realized that it wasn't going to be and I just needed to push myself and actually get started, or it's just not going to happen, is when I got my foot out the door. I think the biggest change that came with it, to be honest, is a mind-shift. Because when you've been working in corporate for so long, and especially if you've gone into senior roles, you kind of get so used to being a people manager and working with teams and everything that when you first go, especially into a sole founder, sort of a role, making that switch to becoming an operator and doing all of these things by yourself is a big switch initially. And also you find yourself being so out of depth on so many things, right? Because in your career, you're kind of moving in the areas where you're truly excelling. And even when you're making these switches, I moved around quite a different bunch of functions but it was still very much in the similar veins of industry and stuff. Now I was having to learn completely different skills and learn about so many things from scratch. At times I felt like I was like a student back in school just sitting with my notebook and just googling thing and then being like, what even is this, right? 'Cause when you're just really building it from scratch, so I think it sometimes, you're like, oh my God, am I? Am I really stupid at this, right? Like what did I do, should I not have done this? But I think it's a humbling and it's a good experience 'cause it forces you to go back and to push yourself and to learn again, to do the nitty-gritty stuff again and to really become an operator again. And it's an interesting journey that you kind of go on before you kind of get to that stage where you're bringing people on again and you have people doing the different things. But that in-between part, I think it's a lot of fun. Suddenly you're wearing like 10 hats, you're all over the place. But I think you learn a lot both about the business you're gonna build about yourself, about so many things. And I think it takes a certain amount of grit, but I think what you build in that is the sort of resilience that you need to then make sure that your business becomes a sort of business that doesn't shut down after the first year, right? It goes on to year two, year three, year four. - Absolutely. Yes, it can stand the taste of time. - Exactly. - Yeah. So your work focuses heavily on understanding human behavior rather than simply increasing conversions. - A lot of people told you about how we make decisions both online and in everyday life. - I think, I mean, for me like he said, I found psychology like super interesting, even as a kid, and it kind of just stayed something that I found interesting through I would say, I would read up on it quite a bit. And then when I came into tech and I started working here, I enjoyed product a lot and somewhere in between the two aligned and I found myself spending a lot of time outside of work just studying about the interaction of behavioral psychology and how the two connect when it comes to like user experience and everything. And I think for me, the way it kind of intersects is that I think it's very much the same way I see how social interactions in the relationship between human beings, how it should be in life. And I believe that there's a certain amount of values and principles that should exist, right? And that should sort of like drive all actions. I think the scene should be replicated on your product experience and your websites and your apps. And what I've noticed is that. So many platforms of late, the way that we interact with them, the way that they sell us their services, it's so, it's just so drenched in manipulative and confusing tactics that every time, for example, you want to, you want to cancel a subscription or, you know, you want to, you know, you forget to, you know, cancel free trial or you simply do not want to, you know, continue a particular service. They actively, you know, work hard to create an experience that makes it difficult for you to be able to achieve that goal, just to kind of keep the revenue in the system, right? And I think, I find it very ironic, you know, that if you're going to put this much effort in making that experience difficult, why can't you put the same amount of effort in actually fixing the base experience that is making me want to leave, right? Like, if I'm leaving, then it's probably because I'm, there's something wrong with the service, right? I came to the service because I had a need and the need is not being fulfilled so now I'm leaving. So if you're going to spend all this time and effort, spend it fixing the, you know, the, the structural issue, don't spend it fixing, you know, don't, don't spend it trying to catch customers in, in dark pattern loops and getting them stuck in, in these, you know, long frustrating interactions with, you know, bots and customer services and cutting off like all human interaction. I think that, that is, you know, something I find very, very frustrating and I, and I truly believe that it's, it's for, for companies to succeed long-term, they need to have ethical UX, right? Because you might be able to keep a customer, you know, around this way for, for now, but they're going to go and tell people that this is what you do and you're going to lose future customers that way. And they're also going to tell people that, you know, this is how you fall short on your service promise and, and so on, right? And, and so, not only are you going to lose your current customer, but you're also going to lose future customers. So, instead of all of this, you know, companies that are done spending more time just enhancing the user experience and building on the right, principles and foundations, those are the ones that are actually going to last and, and, you know, make, you know, the, the long-term revenues. And they're going to, they're going to, they're going to be the ones that are going to stand, you know, the test of time, especially I think now with, with the newer generation with, with Gen Z, I think they're, they're so outspoken about demanding, you know, better experiences at workplaces, in, in corporates, they're so outspoken against capitalism and I think everything. So, I think more, it's becoming more and more important for companies to be conscious of, of how exactly they're, they're treating their customers. And what is the experience that they're providing at every point, and making sure that they, they treat them with, with a certain level of respect in, in empathy and understanding? Absolutely. Making sure that they treat them with a certain level of respect and empathy and understanding. Very important. It will actually help their business growth. So, for someone listening today who's standing at the edge of a difficult decision, a career change, a business idea, or a living to the unknown, what myself, you trust just sort of when consistency wasn't so available? Well, to be honest for me, what has, you know, what, what I've always gone by, in my, I think entire life has been the exact opposite of, anything even close to a straight line. I think it's, it's a zigzag juggled up and then some, right? And I think what's, what's helped me every time I've, I've made one of these decisions is, it's always going to be uncertain. Any decision that you make, there will be uncertainty. Even when you think there isn't, it, there will be, right? It, it may look like, you know, the, the job that you're in or the situation that you're in or the relationship that you're in, whatever you're in is, is absolutely certain. But nothing, nothing truly is what, what is certain is your own value system and, and what, you know, what you can count on when it comes to yourself. And I think so, the most important thing that you need to do is just sit down with yourself and ask yourself, what is it that you want and what is it that you can live with, right? Do you want, you know, the life that, you know, option A is going to lead to or what, what is, what speaks to you in this moment? And, and, you know, what speaks to your character, what speaks to your persona. And keep in mind that those answers are going to change because people, you know, you're going to grow in different ways. So what makes, have spoken to you five years ago, may not speak to you now. And that's completely fine, right? So keep checking in with yourself. But I think that's, that's what you need to do is, that's the most important check in because that's the, that's the one stability that you can count on that's not going to change tomorrow. Is, is, am I going to be able to, you know, make peace with it? Am I going to be able to be there for myself to work? Because that's, that's the one thing that you have in terms of support in terms of reliance. And also in terms of just, what is it that you want to achieve? What is your value system? What do you, you know, stand for? What do you aspire to? Or, who do you want to be? And if you're the sort of person who is laid back and who thinks those are not the kind of questions that I have. And I'm kind of completely fine just coasting by, then that's, that's your, you know, progative and that's completely fine. But if, if you're not that sort of person, and you, you have to ask these questions, and then sometimes you have to, you know, take an uncomfortable plunging in the really cold water and do the hard things. But eventually your, your body gets used to the temperature, you know. Yeah. True. Amara, thank you for sharing your journey with such honesty. Your story reminds us that growth isn't only about reaching bigger milestones. It's also about having the courage to question whether those milestones still align with who we'll be coming. Thank you for showing us that leadership can be thoughtful, business can be ethical, and success can be built without compromising our values. It has been a pleasure having your own experiences. Thank you so much Amara. Thank you so much for having me. Was lovely chatting with you. I really had a great time. Yes, I'm here. Thank you so much. Where can listeners connect with you? You can find me on my website at goprocession.co. And on Instagram, it's goprocessionCRO is our handle. All right. Sometimes the biggest and points in our lives don't begin with confidence. They begin with a quite realization that we've all grown the version of success we once chased. So yes, something to reflect on. Are goals you're pursuing truly yours or are the expectations you've inherited without ever questioning? Growth often begins the moments we give ourselves permission to define success in our own words until next time. Stay present, stay curious, and keep choosing the life that feels true to who you'll be coming to.