Reddit’s Darkest True Crime Confessions

Hi everyone, it's Vanessa Richardson. Real quick before today's episode, I want to tell you about a show I host with forensic psychologist Dr. Tristan Engels. It's called serial killers and murderous minds. Every Monday and Thursday, we take you deep into the psychology of the most chilling murderers and uncover what drives them to kill. Follow serial killers and murderous minds, available wherever you listen to podcasts. This is Crime House. My son killed his ex-girlfriend. I'm so ashamed of being this person's father and having him will always be my biggest regret in mistake. If you're loving crimes of Reddit, please follow, rate and review us wherever you listen. It helps us build this community and we love hearing from you. Get early access and ad-free listening, subscribe to the Crime House Plus community on Apple podcasts. You can also catch us on YouTube where we include visuals that bring every case to life. Welcome to Crimes of Reddit. Today we've got something insane in store for you. What do we have? So I'm going to be walking you through three of the deepest darkest through crime confessions from Reddit. I've been waiting for this honestly at the topic. I am also really excited about these because I do think it's going to be an amazing jumping off point for conversations about our own relationships, especially the first story. Okay. It's going to be good. Like romantic relationships? Yeah. Okay. Or, or no one to sort of admit something to, would you go on Reddit and spell? Here's the thing about me is I word vomit through a lot of people. So the chances that I didn't have someone to just like disclose intimate details and appropriately intimate details to is pretty slim. But yeah, I think I would. I'm not talking about just a normal thing that you would admit to a friend. Have you ever done something so bad that like literally it's a secret you still have or not even bad, weird. Like, are you harboring any secrets that no one in your life knows and should I air it out right now? Yeah, here. This is the place in the time. I don't think I, there's nothing that comes to mind. The first thing that came to mind is like a lie that I told when I was like eight years old that I still like kind of have guilt about. I lied that I auditioned for Campbell's soup commercial. What do you lie about that too, friend? Why? I don't know. You know, when we're eight, you know, it sounds impressive when you're eight. Like, I'm embarrassed talking about it. No, you seem embarrassed, but you shouldn't be. I mean, eight-year-olds do strange things. Anyway, I'm coming clean. You know, I'm proud of you. What about you? There are things no one knows about me, but not because it's a crazy secret. It's because like it just didn't come up. And now, if I just brought it up out of the blue to someone, they'd be like, okay, weirdo. It's like, it's like it's over, and now, if I brought it up, it would just be dredging why you bring it up. Yeah. Interesting. So there are things that are just going to the grave with me and things I probably forgot I did. Yeah. I feel like I have confessions about other people that I've never told. Well, that's good. That's keeping a secret. Yeah, but like, there are things that I would love to air out. Like, I'd love to air out other people's dirty laundry, but without them knowing I was airing out their dirty laundry and without it being able to be traced back to them. I got it. I would love to do that too. Yeah. You would know a lot of the dirty laundry. I, yes, and I wish we could just have a secret notebook that we like leave somewhere. That's what Reddit is. Yeah. Reddit. It really is. Okay, first story. My boyfriend's co-workers joked about killing me in their workshop. That's not a joke. It's not a joke. It's not funny. Okay. So, let's get started. Yeah. My boyfriend and I got into a fight about his job yet again and noticed he was texting a lot after the fight. So once he went to sleep, I went through his phone. I saw the first few texts of them calling me names and saying I'm self-sabotaging things, but then it turned dark. One co-worker said that he, meaning her boyfriend, should roofie me so I just sleep and leave him alone. The next one said she knows how to place a catheter, a feeding tube, and IV so they could knock me out and not kill me. What the hell? But then the next text made my heart stop. She said they could just chloroform me, pull all my teeth out and feed me to pigs until nothing was left. The next co-worker said her grandparents do have a pig farm. Now, let's start with this. This is a male texting his female co-worker. Okay. Yeah. There's a lot wrong with that. Well, okay. It's tough because when you brought this up, because it's a male and a woman relationship, I for sure have, like, joked with friends like if they fuck you over, like, we'll kill him. Yeah, we'll kill him. Like, I know we're to bury a body, but this is taking it to such an extreme level where it's not like a, ha, ha, wish I could, like, care rid of her. No, it's like every single person is one upping and getting more intense and more serious. Well, and these things are cruel. Like, yeah. I would say context matters. Like, if you're venting about your husband or partner to a friend and you're like, oh my God, he threw my silk in the laundry and it's ruined my clothes. I could kill him, right? There's context that would make it not serious. Right. First of all, calling her names, laughing and making fun of your partner with your female co-workers is just like a gleeing for wool. And then now you guys are getting into the specifics of, like, how you would harm her. It feels really dark to me. It feels like it's not a joke anymore and they're kind of a little serious. Right. Yeah. So after the one co-worker made a joke about her grandparents having a pick farm, original co-poster's boyfriend said, "L-M-A-O, no, that's great exclamation." And of course, they all immediately said they were all joking. I packed quickly and quietly, grabs my daughter and left. Now my entire life, as I knew it, is over. I feel like I'm overreacting. I know the police can't actually do anything, so I can't even report it because they never said my name or anything like that. I'm just scared and sad. This is awful. I have a lot of questions. I don't think she's ever reacting, because that's a really scary thing to see. It's one thing if your partner has, like, one confidant, like, a friend that they go to. I had a really big fight with her again. It's the same thing over and over. I don't know what to do. But this is, like, a group of people plotting your murder, and even if it's a joke, like, that's, it's not funny. And making fun of you. Yeah. Like, in a cruel, disrespectful way. And I do think there's a difference between, like, venting. Like, I've definitely talked to my friends about my partners. And like, I was, I'm so mad. Here's what happened. I'm so annoyed, like, getting into the specifics, right? But it's not name-calling. It's not making fun of them in a cruel way. It's talking about my feelings, about, like, something that's hurt me or bothered me. There's a difference. I'm also curious what job this boyfriend has. Yeah. Our partner has. Let's get into some of the comments. Yeah. Because people have feelings. Yeah. So, first comment is, first, good decision. Shocking about killing your spouse is beyond messed up. Second, if his coworkers are so invested in getting rid of you, and your ex is entertaining this discussion, my guess, in true Reddit long jump Olympics, is that she is more than a coworker. Original poster response, she actually is. Oh. They had enough fare about six months ago, and they're still texting. He told me she was no longer working there, but I recognize the number in the group chat. So, he's lying, too. And now, it's giving Chris Watts with his mistress, and how everyone thinks that she was involved, not saying she was, but that's what people think. And there was a lot of shit talking going on about his wife to the affair partner. Right. It's not a good look, and it's often a coworker, right? Yeah. So, another commenter said, "Once a cheater, always a cheater, especially since original poster stayed." That showed him there are no consequences to cheating. That was in response to the affair saying it was over all of that. Original poster responded to that comment. I fully agree with you. I was dumb and believed I could make it work out, but I was obviously very wrong. Cheating does suck, but I do believe that you can, relationships can heal post cheating. It depends on the affair. It depends on the affair and the person. I truly think if it was a one-time thing, or a couple-time thing, it depends on how long you've been together, it depends on what's a stake, it depends on what the partner who cheated, what else they bring to the table. Really, it depends. And are they willing to look at themselves internally? Probably not, yeah, usually. But this situation, I feel like there's a lot of red flags. Yes. So, commenter says this. Even if they don't mention you by name, I would go to the police because they are speaking about killing someone. What can they do? Isn't that the same issue of, like, unless there's an act to do something, they can't really do much? Yeah, unless there's an explicit threat of harm or violence, especially if in the text they said they were joking after them. Yeah. There's an update. Okay. First, I never expected my post to take off and I'm really appreciative of all the advice and support. It really helped. So here's my update. My daughter and I are safe. We left that night and got to our safe spot and haven't looked back. I didn't realize just how bad the mental and emotional abuse was until it was pointed out in a lot of these comments. I really appreciate that. I did report it to the police. I was able to gather enough proof that they were talking about me and they decided to charge them with assault by threat. What? So I was curious about that because I never heard that. Yeah. And I googled which states have this. Right. Of course, I don't have a ton of context other than that, but Texas seems to be the biggest one that really has something and writing about this. Then when they said someone as a pig farm, I also believe it was Texas. So good context. Exactly. You're such an investigator. You know, I've got to put my little red string sure lotting out together. But apparently this assault to threat charge is a big enough deal because then the OP says this. So they charge them with assault by threat, which won't keep them in jail for long, but long enough to maybe scare them into leaving me alone. The three of them did lose their jobs. Oh shit. While it was a locally owned business, I didn't realize it was a franchise. I reported all the messages to the corporate offices as well as some more I'd found about other shady things when I love that. I love that. It's just like the best update we've ever read. I know. I really read it. It took control of life and of giving them consequences for sure. I'm into it. So I don't have to worry about them messing with anyone's food after the awful things that they planned for me. Wait. So obviously it's some food franchise. Okay. Because if they're able to mess with someone's food, you know, right. Which reminds me of the Rajanish movement is that that's the one that the yellow deli call. Oh and the yellow. Yeah. Okay. The yellow deli low key is so good. I've never I've never seen one. I'm dying to go. I have the best coffee. Wow. I'm gonna get excited talking about it. Really? I don't want to like advertise it. But it's like the best coffee I've ever had. What's so good about it? It has amaretto in it. Like the the plant. Yeah. Not the actual not the drink. You know, the drinks great too. But yeah. So like it's like got like a vanilla E almond. Yeah. Coffee flavor. Very good. I'm gonna check that out. I also bought a mug from them. Maybe I'm in the cold. Maybe you are recruiting for the cold. I might be. Okay. So original poster continues after saying, you know, I don't have to worry about them messing with anyone's food. She continues. I'm working on filing for full custody of my daughter. I did meet with an attorney for a consultation and got some sound advice on what to do until I can actually file and get the ball rolling. My ex has been blowing up my phone rotating between begging me to come back and then attacking me about ruining his life over a joke and calling me every name under the sun. I love this OP and I hate that any of this stuff had to happen. But I so appreciate the way that she's like, I'm not looking back. Yeah. And sticking up for herself is prompting her boyfriend to show his true colors. Like attacking her and calling her names while you're begging for her back. I mean, good luck. How's that working out for you? You're showing exactly who you are. Yeah. So OP continues. I did find out the coworker in the chat wasn't the only girl he was sleeping with. My friend went and packed up the rest of my stuff and grabbed one of his old phones by mistake. His Apple ID and most things were still logged in when I powered it on by mistake. That's a good friend. I'm also for sure. Grab my well, they found multiple dating apps and profiles. Thousands of messages between him and different women. He's slept with a lot of them. That's exhausting. That was a good friend to grab the phone. Yeah. Great move. But then also how does he have time? How does anyone living as exhausting, exhausting and when you're living with someone and like, usually when you're dating someone new, like they want to text all the time. Yeah. I would be so bad at sneaking around. I don't know how people do it. But there are shady people who really are masterful at this. Yeah. OP continues. And this is in the context of he was sleeping with lots of different women. He was using no protection or birth control either since apparently one of the girls was pregnant but lost the baby about a month ago. Lots of lies from him about being at work when he wasn't and lots of lies about time he worked and things like that. So violating? Disgusting. Really like different kind of violence. You know, it went back to at least November of last year. So who knows how long that's really been going on. So yes, my life is all flipped upside down. And I'm obviously heartbroken and angry. But my daughter and I will be okay. And I'm okay with that. We aren't ever going back and I'm just ready to move on. Get settled again and also get every STD test available. Yeah. Thank you to everyone who offered support and message me. I really do appreciate all of it. I love her. I love her too. I do feel really bad. The like knowing that your partner or learning that your partner has had sex with so many people unprotected. Like that is I would feel so uncomfortable in my own skin. I would also like need to get tested in. So it's so it's so it's but in a weird way, you know how we like to have a happy ending of sorts. Yeah. This is a happy ending. Totally. Getting out right away once you saw the ugly, once you saw the mask slip, she got out and she never looked back. Yeah. And she's going to be fine. Yeah, she is. But we've got some comments. Okay. Question. Have you seen below deck met episodes, but I'm not fully like caught up the newest season. There's the chef on the season. Her name is Joy. I am trying to embody her in every way of life. She there was a good guy who I'm just going to tell you all this. I'm right. Okay. There's a guy Luke. Well, yeah, vomit. He was flirting with two women. Jen and Joy. He ends up sleeping with Jen, but he likes Joy. And when Joy found out that he slept with Jen, she's like, you I'm not interested in you anymore. You are disgusting. And you are weak. And I don't want a man like you in my life. And she fully goes to him. And she's French. Weak is like the best. You know, calling me weak. Classy dig. Yeah. So I'm I'm embodying her. I love that. And I feel like they give similar energy. Yes. Yeah. Totally. So here are a couple of comments. I'm really happy that you and your little one got away to be honest. It's not too much of a surprise that he was cheating on you with so many women. The shocker, a good one, was that all three were arrested and sacked. Serve them all right though. Don't block him or anyone just put their messages on mute and collect them for your lawyer's evidence to use against them or get a restraining order. Good advice. Great advice. I'm so glad to hear you and your daughter are safe. It takes incredible strength to make such a significant change, especially when dealing with so much emotional and mental turmoil. It sounds like you're taking all the right steps to protect yourselves and gain stability, wishing you strength and peace as you move forward. My last one. This is amazing comment. And I thought it was so interesting. OP, you need to dump that phone of his immediately. He can track you with it. All he needs to do is go on the find my app on his phone and he can see where all of his connected devices are located. Screenshot and send what evidence you need off of it and turn it over to the authorities prosecuting him. I didn't think about that or put on airplane mode I guess. Yeah, but it will still show like last known location. And then you can still do like the ping I think. Yeah, but I also, you know, also be careful with taking people's stuff. Someone really litigious could have you arrested for that. Yeah. Well, in a iPhone could be more than a thousand dollars. So it could be grand larceny. So if you're dealing with a child custody arrangement, you just need to be careful about that. People get really petty really fast. And this guy sounds like someone who would be very petty. Yes. Yeah. All right, we ready for story. I'm ready number two. Yeah. Over the years, I've met people whose lives were changed forever in a single moment in my new podcast before and after. I explore what happens after that decisive moment. Personal, powerful conversations with Colin Kaepernick, Jeremy Renner, Gabby Giffords, and others. Join me wherever you get your podcasts. Search before and after with Lester Holt to listen completely free or subscribe to Dateline Premium to unlock new episodes early. Okay. This is a throwaway account with different details to not expose my family because there are articles of this out. And I want to keep privacy because it includes my entire family who did nothing wrong. When I hear that, my instinct is to be like, okay, I'll find it. I'll obviously find it. Like, all you need is a couple keywords. Right. You know, but we'll just we'll honor the posters, wishes. Ops says it's been five years today and I still can't believe this. I'm so ashamed of being this person's father and having him will always be my biggest regret and mistake. That's so tough. Wow. Six years ago, he got into a relationship with his classmate who was also the daughter of one of my best friends. Her dad and I were childhood best friends. They were both 15 years old. They would be so excited. Probably was in the beginning. And as a mom too, you'd be like, this is the perfect partner. They didn't last a while. Maybe two months. And then they broke up like kids do. The next year around this same time she went missing. We live in a small village about 2500 people. We all went out to look for her all week long with no success. A few kids ended up finding her body on their way to school dumped into a dumpster. Also, I just want to say no shade to the original poster. I hate when they call when they say dumped women's bodies. I know. We're not trash. But I think it hit the body, put the body. I don't like when they say that. But that's kind of what it's like discarded. I know. But like when they're murdered like that, it is like the act that the perpetrator admitted it is dumping. It's like that disrespect. You're right. I just hate the landage around it. I agree. So when the victim was found, she was naked with multiple stab wounds all over her. She was covered in blood. They found the knife dumped with her and my son's fingerprints were all over it. I had absolutely no idea about any of it because he came home at around 9 pm and cleaned clothes and he even helped search for her. Well, that's so thickening. He confessed to everything as soon as he was faced with the evidence and they prosecuted him as an adult and he got 25 years in prison and I don't feel bad for him at all. I never visited him after that. The last time I saw him was when he was sentenced to prison at the courthouse, which happened just two months later because he immediately confessed everything. Ever since then, our entire community has shunned us. My friend and I can only imagine they mean the best friend whose daughter this was. My friend spit in my face in front of the entire village and he'd have killed me if people didn't intervene and I didn't and couldn't even blame him for it because I have two daughters of my own and I get it completely. I publicly just owned him, meaning his son and so did our entire family but the guilt and shame was just too much. I lost all my friends and I didn't have the heart to show my face in that village anymore. So a couple of months later, we sold our house and we moved to a completely different country and continent where we didn't know anyone. I would probably do the same. There's either some information missing because spitting in his face and being so angry at him just doesn't make a ton of sense to me when he's disowned the son and not supporting. It's just anger. It's just anger but the way that you deal with people deal with grief. I know. Have you seen that movie? We need to talk about Kevin. I think that's what it's called. Maybe it's about a couple whose child ends up being a school shooter and it's fiction but I don't know. I think there's a lot of stories similar to this and it's a really interesting look at the aftermath and how everyone in the town just even though they have been like trying to get their kid help then like they also have such regret the way that everyone else turns on them because they have to like their anger is like displaced but they have to put it somewhere. Yeah. That's fair. It's a good contrasting perspective. I appreciate that. I can't even imagine like losing your child and then also I can't imagine being in this position where you like the person you raised and you wanted to have a good life turns into a murderer. There's a lot of nuance here where it's like I think completely disowning your child is probably the hardest thing ever saying you regret having him complicated emotions there and then obviously just all the anger being taken out on the parents left behind it's heavy stuff. I do appreciate because I feel like more often than not you see stories where parents like defend their child to the end and it's like I understand there's so much nuance and complex dynamics there but if you're child murder someone that is wrong. Yes but they were all so 16 you know like yeah it's not I'm not making excuses. I've actually not seen a parent really completely disown a child maybe a teenager when they've committed murder. Move to a different country I mean it was a strong reaction but maybe those are the kind of reactions we need to be having when you know so much violence against women is perpetuated like maybe that's what should be happening yeah you know yeah this is the original poster talking about like the experience of moving to get their continent right they continue I lived in that village my entire life all my family and friends were there I was one of the hardest things I've ever had to do but it was for the good of my family I hate my son for what he did to that poor little girl and I hate him for destroying our family's entire life and I hate him for making one of my very best friends go through the worst pain of father could ever experience every single year on this day I feel it all over again like it just happened and I feel like absolute shit he deserves every single minute he gets in that prison and if we're up to me they'd never let him out he deserves to rot in there big feelings clearly someone who needs to like go and process feelings yeah yeah so should we get into some of the comments yeah one says wow that was so sad to read I am so sorry did he have any remorse or did he show no empathy or emotion the good question well original poster replies and says he was crying but because of the sentence yeah but also if they've never talked to their kid again like you don't really know the point the age doesn't matter but like this killer's brain is not fully developed yeah long-term consequences may not have sunk in at all like truly I I remember being a teenager and doing the most insane shit because you you truly can't conceptualize like a decade later right and what that means and the ripple effects so it's possible that later they'll feel more but like honestly I feel like when you in this might be a controversial take I feel like if you go into prison that young you learn more fucked up shit in prison yeah and you kind of have to become hardened and even more emotionless to get through it and survive prison I'm sure they just got worse we are thinking about it with like the US judicial system in mind where there are other there are other countries that have better better rehabilitation yeah yeah like you're up you hope that maybe there's a chance for rehabilitation but yeah the other side of that is that like their sentences are too short yeah you know in Canada in various European countries like I hear about these horrible murders that happen and then they get like 10 years yeah and I'm like okay maybe you're not letting them out here yeah would you never talk to them again if this were if you were in this position I don't think as a non-parent I could possibly imagine yeah the complexities of deciding something like that I also when someone wrongs me like I probably to my own detriment and maybe not the best way but like I want to like talk it out I want to understand every reason why and just for my own brain yeah I like would need to pour over the closure a lot and I would need to understand where things went wrong and like where I went wrong is where I yeah that's probably another part of this that like is a layer that they're not even there yet like the self blame absolutely yeah so in response to the OP saying that their son was crying because the sentence a comment are responded that sadly means he only does care for himself I'm sorry for you all by the restraining order for all of you guys so that way when he does get released he can't get in touch and OP says I'm living in a different continent altogether and he doesn't know where I am I'm planning to keep it that way yeah comment or response hey OP I unfortunately experienced something similar not to the same extent as you as it was my stepbrother but I see the toll it takes on my stepmom every single day almost six years ago he snapped went on a week long spree of killing kidnaps and home invasions he admitted to everything in a serving 30 years he never showed any signs of being violent before this and had a loving and supportive family you are a victim of your son's crimes he ruined your life too and I'm so incredibly sorry it's not your fault ready it is a beautiful place it is that is so stupid that I never thought we'd say I know but like that is these are very compassionate responses and it's a place obviously like where you don't want to broadcast this to maybe your co-workers they're like hey I have a stepbrother who did this with these are people commiserating over like the darkest corners of humanity whereas like in the public world it's hard to find a resource like that it's hard to find a group like there's no like my son's a murderer group that's on Facebook like you know you're not meeting every week like a a but yeah that's tough I mean we were having this conversation earlier today where I'm like I would love to be a parent in the future but I'm terrified of having a boy because it just feels like such a big responsibility especially in like today's day and age and like our society of like making sure the responsibility of raising a son to be respectful to be like a good human just feels so scary and daunting I agree that I feel like we're commingling with like maybe the last few generations of men who are like we're raised without these terrifying internet influences and like without the red pill influences the manosphere without in-sell influence without the deep dark threads on discord really poisoning the psyches and like poisoning young boys against women my husband his eight you know it's It's like he didn't have any of that. - Yeah. - Sock him in. But then there was the society in general also just has these unwritten rules that are taught and you can't control every aspect of a child's life. Like you can't control the influences that are coming into life from other places. - Once they end up, once they're in school, once they're at their friends' houses. Yeah, it's a scary world out there. And there's scary stuff for girls too. It's like, okay, so girls are mean. - I mean, girls are mean and girls become victims. - So to boys, you know, there's a lot of boys who are victimized by adult men, you know, like these things happen. So by being a parent is such a huge responsibility. - Yes. - And you're really signing up for like. - Yeah. - And a lot of people don't really think that through. - They don't. But the ones who do are the best parents. - Agreed. - I don't know them. - I mean, sometimes the ones, they're all good parents. - Actually, my sister is one of them. - They're the best parents, we're not whatever. Anyways. - But I like this story. It brought up a lot of good conversations to be had. - A hundred percent. Are we ready for the next one? - Yeah. - This is probably my favorite one, just 'cause I think it's going to give us the best conversational. - Great. (upbeat music) - Four universities, four deaths, and four times the truth got buried under the institution that was supposed to protect it. I'm Vanessa Richardson, and this is Campus Crimes, a four-part bonus series on Crime House 24/7. It starts in 1905 when Stanford's own co-founder is fatally poisoned, and the school quietly recast it as natural causes. A biology professor denied tenure opens fire in a faculty meeting. A graduate student stabbed to death in a crowded library and a killer who simply vanishes. And a college basketball player murdered by his own teammate while his coach schemes to smear the victim to save himself. Every case asks the same question. What happens when an institution has more to protect than the truth? Listen every Sunday in August on the Crime House 24/7 feed or join Crime House Plus to get all four episodes right now, add free. Join on Apple podcasts or at CrimeHousePlus.com. My negligence cost my partner her life, and I'm about to lose everything. Oh. I, 35, have been married to Lisa, 28 female for three years. We've been together for seven. A year ago, I fell deeply in love with Amy, 24 female, and had been planning to end my marriage for her. I know it's terrible and not what my wife deserves, but we were the real thing. I'm in the affair, partner, Amy, okay. Two weeks ago, she had an allergic reaction when we were getting food after work, but she used her EpiPen and seemed mostly okay afterwards. She usually gets checked at the hospital after a reaction, but I asked if I could take her home and if she could get her friend to drive her because my wife was expecting me back home. All I know is that she had a secondary reaction that evening and died. This is only the tip of the iceberg with this one. So buckle up. EpiContinues. I didn't even find out about it until the following Monday through a work email. Right, I'm sorry. You didn't check, you didn't try to check it on her? You'll see. - How much did you love her? - They continue. It has been eating me up ever since, and I'll never forgive myself for not sacrificing an hour of my time to possibly save her. I sent some childish messages to Amy, when I didn't hear from her over the weekend because I thought she was angry that I didn't take her to the hospital. - But she should have been if she was alive. - I had a very right to be. - Yeah, I'm thankful she never saw them in a shame that I assumed the worst. Our relationship was great, and the highs far outweighed the lows, but I have always hated being ignored, and I lose my cool when that happens. It is not a regular. - There's so many red flags here. - Oh, it gets so crazy. - It gets so crazy. It's not a regular occurrence, and I would have had more than made it up to her. - She's dead, man. It gets so good. - But here, so we're clear. - Yeah. - He didn't take her. Then he sent crazy messages to her when she didn't respond to him, when she was dead. - And he doesn't really seem remorseful, even though the start of this whole post was like, it's my fault. I feel bad. I don't really think you do. - Okay, ready? - Yeah, no, but yeah. - Yeah. Yesterday at work, H.R. and Legal, we're in this CEO's office all day, and my manager ended up canceling our project meeting because he was in with them all afternoon. I was on edge, but an affair isn't exactly a corporate crisis, and I thought something would have already happened if anyone knew. I am now 99% certain that meeting was about me. A few hours ago, I received a message from Amy's phone, which said, this is Amy's brother, Tom. I want you to know it was me. - What? - We like reported it. - Okay. - Yeah, Tom was getting revenge for his sister's brother. - Yeah. - I would for sure do that too. - Because Tom obviously got the phone after Amy's death and saw the messages, the angry abuse of messages that were sent. - Yeah. - And obviously, he probably outed himself like, I'm sorry to take you to the hospital, you bitch. Stuff like that. - Yeah. - And Tom's seeing this like, oh my God. She could have survived. So, OP continues with this. I tried to call, but it went straight to voicemail. And none of my messages have been delivered, which means Tom blocked. - Yeah. - I tried to call my manager more times than I should have, and he sent me a message saying this, please don't contact me until Monday morning. I can't discuss anything with you right now. - Yeah, this guy is by rolling. - So it looks like my universe is going to collapse. - As it should. - I'm going to be fired, and my wife will find out. You'll definitely find out why I'm being fired. - As she should. All I can do is hope that Amy's brother only showed them the messages from that weekend, and they were bad enough. - It's a delusion. - This guy's a dick. - I can't. - Right? Like, you're worried about being fired. Amy's dead. - Yeah, you're worried about your wife finding out about an affair. - Amy's dead. - Yeah. - Let's remember. - Tom lost his sister. - Yeah. - I have no family except my wife and daughter, and nowhere to go. All of my friends are either people I've met through my wife or my colleagues, who make some good friends in prison. - Literally, if your wife was the center of your whole world, why did you cheat on her? Like, if all your friends were through your wife, she sounds pretty great. - Yeah. - On Monday, everything I've spent over a decade working towards disappears. I can't stop it. I can't talk to anyone about it. So, here I am. I know cheaters are the devil, so I'm not expecting sympathy, but this is making my chest hurt. - Is it where you're like, straight up looking for sympathy or something? Like, yeah. This is making my chest hurt, and I need to get it out there. - This reminds me of the most recent season of White Lotus and the dad, who like, the whole season was gonna kill his family because he was gonna get arrested for white collar crime, 'cause his claim entered the thought of them really disgraced. And they're just talking about how much they love being rich, and he's like, oh my God, I'm not gonna be. I'm gonna poison everyone. - This is a great comment. Tom has real Olena Tyrell energy, true king shit. You don't know who she is? - No. - She poisoned Joffrey in Game of Thrones. - Oh, okay then yes. - Yeah, and then she sort of mocked Cersei, and was like, I want them to know it was me right before she was going to die. But still, it's like, she took things in her own hands, 'cause Joffrey was evil and torturous and murderous. - Yep. - So, the comment continues realistically. I can't blame him, meaning Tom, Amy's brother. - Yeah. - His sister is dead because of cheaty McCheter face over here, and he had other things to do. He can't have him arrested, but he can't otherwise ruin his life. OP, the absolute worst thing here isn't losing your wife, family, job or support system. It's living with your guilt, best of luck. - Yeah, the worst thing is that Amy is dead because you did not help her. - And the Reddit community really don't hold back. Another comment says, wow, you hate being ignored, but are totally cool with ditching your wife and child. Are you really this self-centered? You probably have been ignoring your wife and child for ages over a lady you couldn't stand to not respond due to her medical emergency. She had a reaction in front of you and you got mad. Instead of maybe possibly thinking she was dealing with, I don't know, anaphylaxis, everything that's about to happen to you is your karma. 100%. - You imagine your beautiful sweet daughter marrying a man who she thought loved her. He made vows to her and had a child with her only he found a young impressionable little thing at work who he decided was 1% better than her and therefore was worth neglecting her and their child. Cheating on her for, risking his job by getting her promotions, she wasn't qualified for and was planning to leave her for. This person was only 1% better, your daughter. Cheated on by a piece of shit who only thought with his dick. What would you say about that? - Now this OP respond, not to this, but this added a, you know, a kernel of context that we haven't introduced yet, which is that OP and Amy, Amy was younger, OP was in the position of power at work and gave her promotions, she didn't deserve necessarily because. of his favoritism stemming from the affair, right? So there's an update. I've been consistently harassed for an update since posting, so please take it. Gloat because you're such wonderful people in comparison. Then stop following me around, I read it. Everyone is probably, who's commenting is a better person than nobody. I also think it's fascinating that OP would continue indulging this, you know? And like they're obsessed with themselves. Yeah, so they said this. I am suffering in the wake of my infidelity and unprofessional behavior as I knew I would. I understand that it is an appropriate outcome, and I'm taking full accountability. I was suspended from work on Monday, and I'll probably be fired sooner than I thought. I'd hoped to be able to save money as HR built their case, but it looks like Amy's brother basically performed the entire investigation for them. After an excruciating three hour run through everything they had, I spoke to the founder of their company, and he recommended the solicitor I'm now using. I believe they're in England based on this language, yeah. The issue is that the company has to come down hard on me to protect themselves, because even though Amy's family doesn't have much chance of a claim, any suggestion of a cover-up could cause damage regardless. So things are not good with my wife. I'm still committed to making this as easy as possible for her, but I had to draw a line when it came to my daughter. When I got home from being unceremoniously escorted out of my office, she already had a bag packed for me. She wouldn't let me wait in the house until my daughter was back. She wouldn't let me check to make sure I had everything I needed. She wouldn't let me take the car, and she didn't care that I had nowhere to go. Nor would I. I don't care at all. I spent two nights in a hotel, then went back when she refused to let me see my little girl. She tried to stop me, but we owned the house jointly, and it was my only option. My wife has family. She could stay with, but she won't leave our daughter and, oh my gosh, so zi, you're being inconvenienced. Me and my wife were at a stalemate right now in regards to the custody. I'm keeping out of her way as best I can, which I appreciate is the least I can do. The Amy situation is quite difficult to talk about, and a lot hasn't sunk any yet. It turns out that she didn't love me as much as I loved her, if at all. Her brother sent me images of her, talking to her friends about me, and it's hard to believe they came from the person I loved, but they are real. Zara, to those who were heavily invested in me being a predatory abuser, but she and her friends had a good laugh about her manipulating me for money and a promotion. Roll came with a big pay raise, and it looks like her plan was to treat it as free cash, then go work with one of her friends when it fell through. She knew I'd come under scrutiny whenever she messed up, and assumed I'd keep stepping in to save her. She was right. Obviously I am completely humiliated. I was planning to give up everything to build a life with her, and she was treating me like a joke the whole time. My feelings are complicated, so please don't feel entitled to any expansion on this, but I no longer feel guilt over her death. Shot up. Reddit acted like, can you believe this? And this is a joke. This isn't even the last twist. There's more, but it continues. Reddit acted like I kept her hostage, whilst she begged for help. What actually happened was that I asked if she could ask her friend to take her to the hospital, because I had to go home. She said that was fine because she needed to get some clothes back from her anyway, and I dropped her off as normal. Ultimately, she wasn't adult, who had better understandings of her medical needs than I did. I still don't know what happened between us and goodbye and her death, but whatever it was, it had nothing to do with me. I'm sorry for her family's loss, but I bear no responsibility for her passing. I have to take a sip of water. Or what? There's no curse word or bad name that suits this man. I think it's complicated though. I do agree it's complicated, but the lack of accountability and remorse just makes him a total dickwad. Yeah, I agree. It's interesting compartmentalized thinking. Yeah. So after Amy's messages to her friends were passed around, a few people, meaning I guess co-workers, quietly reached out with words of support. I assumed everyone would write me off like Reddit did, as an abuser and predator. Now it's clear that Amy was using me. They see me as a fool who had then lost it all. It's beyond humiliating, but I have learned I'd rather be pitted than despised, and it improves my legal position with work. Oh, I hate this man so much. They are small mercies, but I'll take what I can get. I remain filled with regret, and I will have learned many lessons by the time I get through this. I may have been deceived, but I am a grown man who made my choices and I take full responsibility for them. So this is where it gets so interesting, and I can't wait to get your data on me. First two comments, OP still doesn't seem, at all remorseful for Amy's death, agreed. Now he just seems but hurt that she didn't actually love him back, another. So sad that he has a daughter that has to be tangled up in all of this. He doesn't seem to care about his daughter's well being at all either. OP is a real POS. Agreed. Ready? I don't know. A new post. I'm a coworker of someone who's read its story about work went viral. I'm feeling chatty, so AMA I guess. So this is a coworker of OP and Amy. Love, okay. I'm in the comments because I worked at the same company as this guy, and in the same department as his affair partner who died under very sad circumstances. Obviously, you can read all about it from his perspective conveniently. I only joined Reddit quite recently, but I was aware of the post a few weeks after it was made because it was passed around the office and gave us all a ton of information which made a lot of things suddenly make sense. You were all extremely invested at the time. And weirdly, the story you all saw set up a series of events which basically led to an entire division of the company quitting. Whoa. A few people in the comments of the post I saw earlier today seemed interested. So because the company didn't think to get me to sign any additional confidentiality agreements when I left an equally dramatic but also closely related story, I figured I'd spend a Friday night drinking wine and spilling tea. Wow. This is the most intense work drama. We could do that for another episode, work drama. Yes, I love that. I love that. So one thing I do need to mention is that the original poster, the OP, has a brain injury he didn't disclose in his posts. I can't speculate too much on that. And I'm not saying it makes his actions forgivable but it would be crazy to pretend it's not a factor here. They elaborate. They say this. He lives independently but from what I'm aware his brother helps him a lot. Now a commenter says this. It's so interesting how the fact that he had a brain injury changes this story and makes it make a different sort of sense. Like how on the other hand, you and your co-workers reading the Reddit post did the same but in a different way. The worker says this. Oh, for sure. We were absolutely horrified by some of the things people were saying to him when it started getting passed around. And we were really worried about how he'd take it all. There was talk of creating an account to explain but because it was looking like it might end up in court no one wanted a risk it. Can't blame them really but it's definitely mad how much that fact changes things. Yeah, it's like a big piece that we're missing. Well, and it's like the co-workers on the OP side. Right, that's what it sounds like. Yeah. So another commenter says this. Did it end up going to court? Co-worker, no. Because all the higher ups at the company basically like abuse their expense accounts. So all of them had skeletons that they were trying to hide. So they didn't want the case basically going to court. Of course. Yeah, like everything would appear in discovery so they didn't want to out themselves. Right. I know you shared that he has a traumatic brain injury that influenced his thinking. Was it as wildly apparent and handicapping to his professional life as it was his personal? He seems easily manipulated if you fed his ego the most minimal scraps. Here's where the co-worker shines the biggest light on all of this. And it'll help us look through the entire thing like with a completely different lens. Co-worker, it was really weird. And I can't think of a better way to put it than really fucking weird. I'm an engineer by trade. And he could ask a million extremely complex questions about the technology I was working on and pose reasonable follow-up questions based on my answers, which required a ton of domain knowledge, not immediately after the accident, but certainly within a year. He could also within minutes of making a super insightful point, which totally changed the direction of my week, fall apart because a sandwich had too much mayo on it. I don't know if you've ever seen the expressions of a child superimposed on an adult's face, but it's unsettling in a way that sticks with you. I personally couldn't, in good conscience, treat him like an adult full-time. Interesting. He was fine maybe 80% of the time, but when he slipped, it was like interacting with an eight-year-old in an adult's body. He wouldn't say much when he got confused, but his face would totally change. I don't know him well, but I'm not convinced he could properly consent to a sexual relationship. There's so much going on here. Between the wife, the daughter, he's already married with a child in a family. He's obviously got a high demand job. He's an engineer or something like that. Sounds like the accident. I was like a year ago or something like that. So it's recent and then that would make such an impact. - So the implication here, per the coworker, is that Amy took advantage of him that he couldn't possibly consent to a sexual relationship. That possibly, I'm further, you know, gleaning from what you're saying, that perhaps he couldn't understand the severity of the allergic reaction. - I mean, it does make sense that like in his original post about how he's so blasey about so many things. - Yeah. - It's fascinating. - What are your takeaways? Like, I know that was a lot of like talking through the coworker. - And a little bit of whiplash. - I know. - 'Cause I wanted to hate him so bad now. - Yeah, I mean, big picture. Yes, Amy was an adult and she's had these issues and like allergies before, where after you get an heavy pen, you have to go to the hospital. Like, heavy pen just like helps you in the moment you need to go to the hospital just to make sure you're okay. They should have just called 911 and she got an ambulance. - Yeah. - That's on both of them. - I don't, I think yes, there's negligence, but I don't think he like intentionally left her to die. - I think it's nuanced. - Yeah. - I think it's complicated. Because like if he has sort of this brain injury, what if she passive aggressively was like, yeah, I guess I'll just have my friend do it. And he took it as, okay, she said yes. - Yeah. - You know, because like some people are very literal. And anything could have happened here. So it's just more complicated than the original thought. - I really wanted to hate him. And now I'm just confused about him. - Yeah, yeah. If we didn't get the context, I would still hate him. But no, I'm like, I don't know. And now I feel like I can't weigh in. Now I feel like I don't. It doesn't make you question the things that you read on Reddit where you're like, am I getting the full picture? Can I trust this original poster's perspective on everything? - Context matters. - Context matters. I can conveniently leave certain information out based on their like defense mechanisms and wanting a Reddit community to maybe validate them. - Right. - But like he was brutally honest in his posts. - And people hated him for it. - Yeah, they did. - Yeah. - Including me. - Yeah. - Wow. - I know. That's, you took me on a roller coaster. - I know. I took myself into our first amusement park together. - I know, when it was fun. - Yeah. - I didn't throw up. I got nauseous. - And then you had a good time. Then you had a dopamine rush. And now I'm having a calm down. - Yeah. - Yeah. - Sat it's over. - Sat it's over too. - We gotta go back. - So, if you have any confessions, 'cause this is my, I, these were a twist like I wasn't expecting this type of confession. I was expecting people to be like, I did this. - Yeah. - Or I have a confession. I mean, I guess the last one was a little bit. But if you have confessions of your own, please share them with us on our Reddit. It's our backslash crimes of pod and we'll potentially share it on a future episode. And if you have any other stories that you want us to cover on upcoming episodes, you can leave them in the comments too. So thanks for joining us for Crimes of Reddit, a Crime House original. You're at Crime House. We want to thank each and every one of you for your support. If you like what you heard here today, reach out on all social media channels at Crime House. Don't forget to rate, review, and follow Crimes of Reddit wherever you get your podcasts and your feedback really truly does make a difference. We'll be back next Tuesday and next week I will be sharing the stories that you will be blindly reacting to. - I'm excited for my roller coaster ride. - Me too. - We'll see you then. - See you then. - Bye. - Bye. - One of everything you learned in history class was only half the story. I'm Dr. Harini Bot. 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