Pretty Little Episode #98

Hi, it's your friend Tignotaro sitting here with Macohost, Fortune Femesur. And this is a pretty little episode, is it not? It sure is, feels very pretty to me. In your office, I know you have that gavel that makes your office officially an office. I have this. Ah, Fortune, is this new or have you had this? This is from when I guess hosted Jimmy Kimmel, and I just found it, and I was like, I think I need this in my office to make it an official office. Is it on the edge of your desk? Yeah, it's right up here. I love it. And so if anyone wants to take a meeting with me, they know whose office this is. Okay, I have my ex's parents in a coaster on my desk. Oh my gosh. I just realized that people listening don't know what I held up. It's my name. It's a name plate of my name. Nobody's listening. They can only see that on a video. Yeah. And yeah, you have your ex's parents. Those are the parents you're close to. Yes. They have been like parents to me. Thomas has met them. Yeah. They are just delightful elderly folk living in the middle of cornfields, and my wife and children and I go visit them on our family vacations. I love it. Yeah. Anyway. Any huzzles? Yeah. Any good day? I am. I've been out of town. And I have this thing that's a blessing and a curse. My assistant set up a slide show on my laptop. So when it goes to sleep or whatever, it just plays all the hits of photos. And it is so nice to be able to see my family and cats, but it also, I'm like, get me home. Oh, yeah. Get me home. So that's been an interesting new part of my touring life, is I. Yeah. Because I mean, how often do you really scroll through your photos or videos or maybe you do? Not often. Yeah. And so having that on my computer is so, so nice. So yeah, I've been gone, I don't know, almost two weeks, maybe, and got home yesterday and then Stephanie and I went to a dinner last night and then this morning, we then went to camp and then we went to a movie with Max. I saw a movie. I saw a movie. Uh-huh. What movie? That New Spielberg movie? Oh, yeah. How was it? It was good. Max loved it. Yeah. I mean, aliens and all sorts of stuff. He was just like, dig in it. Yeah. But I hadn't seen a movie since Forest Gump a few months ago. Wow. Mm-hmm. Well, that's cool. Yeah, because it's in the theater, so you went to the movies. Yeah. We went to the movies. I like one to the movies. Well, we should have invited you. I was. I was available. I should have asked you. Yeah. That's been the day. It's like when they each have camp, the other one has a free week and then gets special day and special time. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I'm home for, I think, until Saturday, and then I go off again for like a week, but not anyway. Love that. All is good. What about yourself? I'm good. I just filmed something. I don't think I can say what it was yet, but it requires you to eat food. Oh. It was good. It's food I'd normally like, but they amp it up a lot. Okay. Yeah. My stomach's just in a little bit of a like rumble, rumble, like it, like you had too much, or no, it does something to your palate that messes you up. Okay. And do you, and Matt, did they say you should be good by this time, or you should be thinking it affects everybody's body differently. Okay. All right. Okay. Well, yeah, tomorrow, maybe. If you get a good rumble, can you move the mic down? And so you can hear it. Yeah. I'll leave you in on that. Thank you. Did you have a good time taping? I had a very good time. We're doing press now for the hawk that's coming out mid July. The golf show with Will Ferrell. So I was filming this with him and Jimmy Tetra, who's in the show as well. Awesome. Yeah. So it's a good day, other than Mattelmi's. And that show also has Molly Shannon, right? It does, but she, I don't know if she's out of town, but she didn't, she was, I think asked to do this, but didn't do it. But I think, yeah, she might be out of town, but. Or she's just writing her bike around my neighborhood. She might be doing that too, but we're about to all, for like two weeks in July, be doing a bunch of press together. Well, gear up. Yeah. I'm sure it's a massive press tour. I think so. Yeah. Yeah. Cool. So the people have to check it out when it comes out. Little Cowboys in two of the episodes, I believe. Oh, really? I thought it was just one. That's great. I think it. Well, maybe it's one, but I thought it stretched out to two. Okay. I'm not sure. Don't quote, don't quote me on that, too. I quote you all the time. What should we get to some questions? Yeah. Let's get to some questions. Hi, handsome. This is Ryan. Love the pod. Love you guys. Funny little stories that my wife and I separately got into your podcast and kept it secret from each other, because we didn't think it was a podcast. The other would enjoy. And then we thought that we both love it, so we're enjoying it all. Question for you. This is a question I asked lots of people in my life. If you had to summarize how to live a handsome and good life in a single word, what would that word be? And why? Give me an explanation of what's it all about. Mm. Wait. So if you could live a handsome, good life, wait. I think I'm used. Use one word to describe a handsome and good life. Okay. Yeah. My immediate thought was openness, because if you're open about who you are, if your communication is open with people, if you are open to change, and I don't know, that was the first word that struck me. I feel like when everything's cleared out and open, you can be who you are, and you can do your thing. Yeah. I like that. Mm-hmm. That's a good one, Tig. Thank you, Fortune. Let's hear your good one. The word that came to mind for me was authenticity, living your life open, but yeah, being who you are, being true to yourself, being, you know, just like not living your life for other people and not always feeling like you have to do what's expected of you based on pressure or norms or anything, you're just like staying true to your own beliefs and what makes you happy, but you know, also being a good person. Mm-hmm. But yeah, I think that, you know, that song I did it my way kind of makes me think of that. You wrote that. I did write that. Mm-hmm. I went back in time. Yeah. And you did it your way. I did it my way. J. With the Frank Sinatra. Yeah. I remember that day. I did it my way. Such a good song. Some more tunes for you. I love that he and his wife secretly listen to handsome. See, that's the importance of being open. That's right. Openness did. That's right. I like that. I like it too. I like it too. A beautiful circle. Good. That's what I do. Well, and a whole full circle is open. Should we go to our next question? Just like a whole. Sorry. That's okay. It's really okay. This time, Fortune Marie, it's okay. Oh, there's a, um, I had to tell you a listener of handsome crocheted me a cute little, um, I don't care of underpants. No, the - Cause that ponteuse. - Ponteuse. Crochet, this little, it's like in the shape of like a picture. - Okay. - It's framed and it says, "Fortune Marie, exclamation mark." And it's got like a flowers around it. And I put it on my new bar cart. - That is so cute. - It made me laugh the thought of like, "I have three bourbons and then that sign." And it made me think like, "Fortune Marie, you're really going to have a drink." (laughing) "Fortune Marie, don't drink." Now that I've ever, I'm not a big drinker. I like a drink, but it just gave me a good chuckle to think that this sign is yelling at me to drink responsibly. - Fortune Marie, don't drink too much and then drive your bar cart around the house. - That's right. - So thank you to that handsome listener for that cute little fortune Marie. - There's so many handsome listeners on my tour on all of our tours. It's wild, it's wild, you know. - For me, what I think of to live a good life is kindness. I think that makes everything work better. If you're kind to the people around you, good things will come your way. If you're kind to yourself, you'll be fulfilled and at the end of the day kindness beats everything else. - All right, thanks so much for living guys a lot. Fortune, we get to see you in a couple of days in Portland, Maine. - Very exciting for you. - Oh yay. - Awesome. I love the kindness is good. Kindness is not a terrible thing. - As long as it's authentic and open. - That's right. - Yeah. (laughing) - What else we got on the Dacket? The Dacket. Nice one. - Thank you. - I still got it. - Yeah, you do. - Hi TIG and/or Fortune and/or May. My name is Ruth. I am in North Carolina and I desperately need your advice. So for context, I am 33 years old and I just finished my PhD last year and I moved to North Carolina for a job that is perfect for me. Like I really enjoy it. It really uses my skillsets well. It uses my PhD. It's great. However, the location I'm in is not ideal. Like I'm not very socially fulfilled. There's not a large queer community. It's not great. And previous to this, I was living in Boston, which I loved and I started dating someone that easily could have been the love of my life. But then I got this job and moved to North Carolina. Some broke up. And so now I'm just like, what are we doing? Are we living to work or are we working to live? And is that something that has changed for you all? Do you consciously think about it? Give me your advice. It could very easily change the course of my life. So no pressure. All right. Thank you guys. What do you think? I mean, I think you've been better about that lately, right? Find in the balance. You know, I was just talking about this at that dinner last night about how I have been trying. And then I can't-- it's so tricky because it's like-- I made serious changes and shifted things in my life. And then it happened to overlap with the success of the documentary, which made me so busy, you know? And so I didn't fully experience that. But I used to plow through and towards plow through my material and my tour and trying to get to the next thing. And I just-- that's where it's really changed for me. I'm just taking it much slower. I'm just doing a weekend of months, which I just used to not do at all. And so that feels good. But I'm curious to see how this new year come, you know, like what's coming. Because if I maintain that and podcasting, that's a pretty sweet gig. And the popping in and out of movies and TV shows, I'm all about it. Yeah. That is-- that feels like a schedule I can work with. But it's not anything I fully experienced yet because of the wonderful success of the documentary. So I don't know if I can-- I don't know. I don't know the answer. But you are from North Carolina. So I feel like you're holding the key to Ruth's future. I mean, I think when you're younger, that is the time to sort of take those risks in regards to career. Because you want to set your life up in a way where it's comfortable, hopefully. You've done some hard work. And so at some point in your life, you can take it easier and enjoy the fruit to that labor. That's kind of how I look at it. I don't know. It makes me bummed for Ruth about that relationship that could have been a strong connection there that could have been the love of her life. So I would have been like, could that have still worked? And maybe it will down the road. Yeah, maybe. It's kind of like, well, why not give that long distance thing a go? I've done it in the past. And some-- I don't know. I always kind of think, give it a whirl. Same as taking risks with work. Why not take risks there as well? And if it becomes a thing that's all this isn't working, then you know you've gone down that road. But you know, with work, I'm certainly not one to give advice because I work all the time. But I work all the time because I don't work to live. I genuinely love my work. It brings me a great deal of joy. I've probably had some things in my life fall apart, maybe because of that commitment to that work. But I got fulfilled in that way, going on the road, doing shows, filming something, taping a podcast. My cup felt full because I was doing something I love. But sometimes other people's cup feels not as full because you're not around. And so yeah, I think there are sacrifices that come with it when you've sort of dedicated your life to a certain thing. So you just have to kind of decide what is important to you. Is do you love your work so much that you're willing to sacrifice some of those things for it? Or do you feel empty in that you're working a lot and you're not being fulfilled by that? And it's affecting your personal life. Does that make sense? Yeah, I mean, Ruth was saying she really loves her job. And so it does feel like something to go towards for a beat. See how that-- I don't know how long Ruth, maybe I wasn't listening, but I don't know how Ruth has been at this job. But the other thing that I always like to tell people to do is if you're not meeting friends or romantic interests in your day-to-day life, switch up the route that you take. Go to different places. Find a whole new coffee shop, become a regular there. Find a new restaurant. Find a new park to walk your dog. Just make yourself available because I always think of all of the different lives and worlds. I could have started if I had just gone left. And then all of a sudden, you see your town in a whole different way. I mean, I've had my course change significantly because I decided to go to one thing instead of another thing. Yeah. So you truly never know. But I think even-- I would say with work, you're young enough to be focused on your work and have that be a priority. But maybe also, I don't know what you're into, Ruth, but say you are into tennis or soccer. Join a league once a week so that you have something outside of work that you have to look forward to. I played soccer in a league for 15 years before COVID. It was every Monday night, and that was my sacred time for me. I let no work things get in the way of it ever. And I really loved having that thing for myself. Yeah. So whatever that thing might be for you, I would maybe also put that into your routine as well. Ruth, sounds like you have a soccer career coming your way. Something. Let us know how it goes. Whatever you're into, Ruth, find it so that you have balance. Yeah. Go get 'em, Ruth. Ruth, you got this. Yeah. And who knows what is ahead of-- For you in the love department, you know, nice North Carolina gal out there. Hmm. Well, thank you for the questions There's always a delight to hear and submit questions and advice requests to speakpipe.com/handsompod Mm-hmm. Yeah, do that. It's up y'all. We like to Hear what you got to say Yeah, hit us up and also I have new dates added to Tignotaro.com head over there get your tickets and come see me in the flesh Mm-hmm. Yes, I'm here. I'm doing a lot of fun shows coming up in August up in the northeast Like province town in West Hampton Beach and Foxwood casinos and red-bank New Jersey get on it Mm-hmm. And until next time Keep it pretty Some Handsome is hosted by me Tignotaro, May Martin and fortune-themedster. The show is produced, recorded and edited by Thomas Willett email us at [email protected] Follow us on social media at handsomepod What a podcast! What a podcast! That was a hate gun podcast