Praying Manti Te'o | Son of a Boy Dad #447

Hey son of a boy, dad listeners. You can find every episode on Apple podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen, add free on Amazon music. - This episode is brought to you by State Farm. Football has a play for just about everything. You can go deep, keep it on the ground, or drop something nobody sees coming. And whether you want to run a flea flicker or the push push, you need a plan to fit your unique situation. That's why State Farm takes the time to get to know you so they can help personalize coverage for your life and budget. Now that's a solid game plan. Like a good neighbor, State Farm is there. - Work hard and hydrate hard with Body Armor Flash IV. Whether you're working in extreme heat or powering through a long shift, Body Armor Flash IV delivers faster, longer lasting hydration. With more than 2,000 milligrams of electrolytes, vitamins B and C and zinc, coconut water, and no artificial sweeteners, flavors, or dyes, Body Armor Flash IV keeps you performing at your best. Get Body Armor Flash IV at your local 7/11. - Folks, this episode of Son of a Boyed Ed is brought to you by our friends at high noon. I'll tell you what, this past weekend, last week in a fall golf, probably in the Northeast, I was drinking high noons, and I was absolutely in my element. I had a whole box of the peaches, they were cold as ice, and I was really on cloud nine. - No, it's so nice. You can get a specific flavor, whether it be the vodka or the tequila. I've really been enjoying the pineapple recently, pineapple is one of those blue blood flavors that's gonna be a classic every single time, but you could also stray out. I mean, these tequila's come in a passion fruit, a strawberry, a grapefruit, the lime, like I have. There are so many options, so many flavors, it's such good ingredients. - Exactly, and as we head into the winter months, I'll tell you what, a lime high noon transports me right to the beach. - That's right, you need it more than ever. - Yeah, so there's no malt, no high fruit, toast, corn syrup, it's mine. I like the vodka's with real fruit, juice, sparkling water, and natural flavors. Only a hundred calories, he's a tequila guy. If you're curious about where you can learn more or get yourself some high noons, go to highnoonspirates.com, enjoy the episode. - I had a different drink. - I mean, it's got to be a hundred degrees in here. It was actually ridiculous. All right, welcome back to the Son of a Boydab podcast. - We are live from HQ 3, Kim Jong-un is in a coma. Did you guys know this? - With an intentional coma, I heard. - No, did you, this actually happened. He suffered a brain hemorrhage. - Don't fuck around, bro. First jailing hurts and then Kim Jong-un. - I'm breaking this live. - Dead? Rumors that he's dead? - Those rumors that he's dead. - I feel like there are always rumors. - Yeah, that's kind of what I was wondering too, 'cause they said he was dead a couple of years ago. I actually don't think we've seen him since. - Isn't his girl boss daughter next in line? - Oh yeah. - I heard that he's got a CEO in training. - She's gonna fuck shit up. It's gonna be one of those things where they're like, she's gonna be like, they don't think a woman can do this job. So now I'm gonna blow up every thing. - That's the first. - I'm gonna blow up the whole world to show them. I can do it. - He's 42 having health problems. I mean, imagine being his doctor, trying to tell him you can't do something. - Oh yeah. I mean, they have health problems in their family though. - No more sweets. - Boom. - Yeah, the owns. - The owns have a history of bad health problems. His brother, or I don't know if it was his brother, his dad had a tumor on the back of his head. That was like the size of a bowling ball. It was like another head. - Oh no. - He had like two heads. - I swear to God. - I swear to God. - It's disgusting. - The classic oon tumor. - Yeah. - You hate it. Everyone gets it. They all get it. If you're an oon, you're cursed. - Wait a minute. Show this. This is insane. - So this is grandfather. Oh, did not have. Yeah. This is propaganda, bro. You're basically rigorous. - What is that? - And what is that on the back of his head? - That's a haircut. - That's a boil. - That's a boil? - Mm-hmm. - You goofy bastard. That's a haircut. This is obviously, if there's not more images, oh my God. - Yeah. - What do you think that is? - You should have popped that a long time ago. - Yeah. And they're like, no, he doesn't have it. - That's not an oon. - It does. Maybe even a trace, a tray. - That's like the Emperor's new tumor. He's just walking around and knowing we'll tell him that he's got a fucking bulbous growth on the back of his neck. - He must just think like no one notices. I guess it's, most be like a lot more hidden than I think. - Yeah, it's nice. - It's tiny. - The doctor said it doesn't exist. It's not there. This is actually a good thing. That means you have more brain than anybody else. - Like what does that mean though? Like why would Google say he doesn't have it? When we're looking at it, he has it. - Well, that's not necessarily a tumor. - So what is it? - Do I know? That's a black and white photo. That photo was taken in 1312. - So what do you think it is? I mean, if I'm looking at that. - I know, that's a true art. - Not a doctor. - You think it, you still think it's a boil. - I was being funny. I liked the word boil. - It's acting. (laughing) - It really what it looks like, a hot spot, which is what you get a dog, you know, licks and something, and then you shave the fur to let it dry out. That's what that looks like. - But if it gets big enough, you can get Wi-Fi off of it. (laughing) He's definitely got 5G on that thing. - Yeah, that's nice. - There's no doubt in my mind. - The only people that have Wi-Fi in North Korea, people with a five foot radius of a spot. - Of a hot spot? - Of that guy, yeah. - I mean, that is a tumor. If I've ever seen a spot, I think if Dr. Pimple Popper took a scalpel to that, that would ooze a satisfying pus. - That shit's disgusting. - I hate that. - Yeah, that's fine. - I love it. - At that point, you may as well just go on lively, you can watch people getting their heads ripped off. 'Cause that shit is disgusting. - It really is. - Yeah. - The worst seat ones are the ones where people just squeeze their nose. - Yeah, and it's like shooting on all different directions. - Pieces of white come out. - Yeah, it's strange. - It's very jarring seeing that account, and then seeing your mutuals that follow the account. - Yeah. - It's like, you have this on your feet every day. - Some people are into it, man. - I don't know why. - I don't know why. - I don't know why. - It's their calming 3 AM, their last scroll. You'll see the comments on some of them, and it's time to go to bed. - That's sick of me. - It's the last thing that you see before bed. - It's really sick of me. - The scrolling, I'm out on scrolling. I don't know, I don't do that anymore. - Oh, wow, virtuous. I mean, I know you're still bound to the shackles of your phone. - I keep my phone in a different room. - I didn't even know that it came from-- - You do not. You're trying to impress Francis. - I didn't know that. (laughing) - I honestly had no idea the name was known from Kim Jong Il. - I'm Kim Jong Il. - I thought it was Kim Jong Il. - Your phone's not leaving. You probably sleep with it in your pocket. - I keep-- - You probably got, like, those like, spandex shorts. I got an hour's underneath. - I got an hour's underneath. - And it's just in my face. - I can't answer a call with my tongue. - Not me, though. I'm away. I'm off. - Yeah, right. You probably saw a horrifying screen time number this week. - Oh no, I don't-- - No, I don't-- - We were like, "I gotta change." - I don't go on my phone. - I did last night that I felt a little irresponsible doing my phone to your room. - I'm sorry? - The phone entered the room. - No. I wanted to watch a movie. And so I didn't want anything to do with my phone. And I just turned it off completely. - Excuse me. - Well, that was the whole time I was saying that. I had it coming and I was like, "I don't know if I'm gonna get through this." - I did, though. - It's power of human will. - I went full phone, just dead, dark. - Yeah, it feels a little risky. - You just think like, "Are my parents dying right now?" - Yeah. - Are my parents dying as we see, as a consequence of me disconnecting? - Yeah, the phone off feels risky. - Yeah, but I had just spoken to my parents and had a nice conversation with them. So I felt like, if they perished, at least I had learned-- - We left it on good terms. - You'd let them know. - Yeah, yeah. - You had just got off the phone with their doctors. They had a clean bill of health. - Yeah, yeah. - It felt suitable. - In fact, I knew I was gonna turn my phone off while I was on the phone with them. So I was like, "Mom, dad, I just want you guys to know you've been the best parents ever." - Yeah, yeah. - Just in case anything happens. - I'm watching the Norman Donald movie. - I did watch The Norm Doc. - No spoilers. - I mean, it's like one of my favorite things that I've-- - I know, I've heard it's great. I'm pumped to watch it. I'm actually gonna watch that and I'm gonna see that Nathan Fielder doc. - I watched that. I'd love to get to that after you talk about this. - Okay, I also watched The Lorne Michaels Doc, which was also really great. - Who made that? - I don't know, it's on Netflix. - Is that a Judd piece? - I'm not sure. - 'Cause The Norman was, right? - I think so. - Yeah. - What made it extraordinary from a filmmaking perspective? - The Norman? - Yeah. - I mean, it's just so like tongue and cheek, like they play The Great Moments, so many of us have seen on YouTube, right? Like when he goes on the view. - Oh yeah, classic. - And he's like, the president murders a murderer or something and they're like, shut up. And they're like getting on him and they're mad. - Yeah. - And then they're like, you can see this idiot later tonight on who wants to be a millionaire and immediately cuts to him, getting winning 500,000 dollars. And then like, blind guessing on the last one and Regis is like, I can't let you walk away with just like blind guests and he would have gotten it. - Yeah. - He was like, I'll say Greenbrier. - I remember that. - It was what golf course has like a bunker under it for, you know, and he's like, I'll just guess Greenbrier. It's not pying her, so I know that. And he was right. He would have won a million. - That's crazy. I remember seeing that clip. - Yeah. - Regis is such a piece of shit for that RFP. - That's the one where he pulls out the phone and you need to pretend to get a point. phone call. And they're like, what was that? And he's like, I don't know. He's like, someone told me it would be funny if I pretended to get a phone call. He was a very odd guy. Yeah. I mean, he didn't really like, I don't know, fit in in a lot of ways. But I think that's what made him so beloved. Have you ever heard the Adam Sandler story of him keeping the poker chips in his refrigerator? No, it's very funny. Don't tell, don't say it though. I won't. Oh, no, say it. Why didn't just tell me the story? You'll have to find it yourself. Don't do ball me with the story and be like, dude, there's this incredible story. Anyway, well, I'm not just going to retell the story, but it offers nothing to the listener. Pretty much Adam Sandler once visited Norm MacDonald's apartment in the 1980s and found $25,000 worth of Atlantic City casino chips stored inside dorms refrigerator. That's pretty much the short of the story. This sucks. The way this is happening, I hate it. I hate this. I apologize. Well, he had some color. Tell us your version. I don't have a version. I was simply just asking why he did that. No, no, I don't. And it's somehow becoming unfunny. I was kind of more asked. I wanted you guys to hear the story. I was hoping one of you guys would be able to explain the story to me. Had you only ever read this? Was that what happened? No, I've heard the story of Adam Sandler opening his refrigerator and there's $25,000 of poker chips. Okay. So apparently Norm claimed he won big on a Friday and kept the chips in the fridge to consult his manager, Bernie Brillstein about how to avoid paying taxes on the winnings. Brillstein told dorm that he still had to pay taxes no matter what. When Sandler asked him on Monday, it's Saturday night live. If he cashed them in, Norm admitted he had already lost all of them. Great story. I'm glad I was able to bring that. I am too. You did a great, you did a great job. I didn't know you knew that. Oh, well, you know, that's the classic Norm poker chip story. Did a great job with it. I don't know if you guys know this, but the fridge was actually an Xbox live. That'd be awesome. Back there we go. He's a Canadian, right? Yeah. Nathan fielders Canadian too. Really? And they both have like a very such a peculiar sense of humor. Yeah. Such a brilliantly unique sense of humor, but in different ways. Yeah. And I find that about a lot of very successful Canadian comics isn't Tom Green. Like peculiarly Canadian as well. Yes. Tell us about the Nathan field or document. It was fucking incredible. No spoilers though. It was incredible. But the circumstances of it to me were rather frustrating. I went to a movie theater where you can lie down in the movie theater seat. And the last time I went there was the last movie I saw before my wife gave birth to our kids. And we could lay down fully and someone would bring you food because you could order at your seat. And it was fucking awesome. What theater? It was I picks in like like a like a fight. I kind of by the water. I'm not familiar with that one. You can lay down fully. It wasn't and the food was pretty fucking good. Yeah. My wife had terrible acid reflux. She couldn't eat anything. So I got three times as much. Yeah. Of course, gorging myself. And it was fantastic. And then this time we went to the same theater. Showed up about five minutes before the theater planning the order again. And they said it's under new management. They've discontinued being able to order at your seat. You have to wait in a long line. Got to the end of the line right as the movie was starting. And then they said, we're going to give you a buzzer. And you have to come back. Oh, no. 15 to 20 minutes. 15 to 20 minutes into the movie. We can't start. You drink at your seat. Either you have to figure out what you're going to want for the entire movie. And like, you know, it's supposed to be a boozy experience. You have to just figure it out right now. That's not right. That's not right. And they made it so the seats don't fully recline anymore. The seats did not fully recline. Just a little cherry on top. The seats didn't fully recline. And they didn't have a side. So I was just kind of sliding out of the chair slab. Shit. It was fucking. I don't have a side. There was no side to my seat. I had one sit on the ground. Just the coffin seats on the fucking seat again. That's fine. I was just slipping out of these seats. Trying to fucking giggle at this movie. And then about an hour into the movie like this really like distinct. It sounded like a close credits sound started playing this song. I was like, it's probably just in the theater next door. I'm not going to get too distracted, but my wife's getting distracted. People around me are starting to get distracted. And they're walking out finding other people in the theater to be like, what's this sound? Because it goes on and it goes on and it goes on again. And it's about 45 minutes of just songs playing inside the theater. And then it stopped at 15 minutes later. It started up again with the same exact first song. Some was alarm someone's phone in the row right behind us was just blasting music for maybe an hour and a half of the movie. And it was infuriating like they were doing it on purpose. It was an old lady who didn't even know that she was doing it. Oh, you could have hit her. Yeah, we should. Well, the lady's next door started hitting. One lady was like, Hey, it's not okay. Like, why are you smiling? And the lady next to her is like, you've been ruining an hour and a half of this fucking movie. Like, don't smile. Don't really? Yes, it was like a phone. Damn, why didn't anyone stop her before it reached the door. Nobody knew where it happened. It was just this, it was at the bottom of her purse. So it's like this kind of faint music that the entire movie theater can hear. She's a ventriloquist. She was throwing the sound all around. She was a genius. She was like one of these newfangled terrorists. She was running for government and Michigan or something like that. She was destroying the movie watching experience. That would never fly in my, in a theater that I'm in. I would have shot that down in the, how? I would have said, where's the sound coming from? Oh, directly behind us. Hey, is there music coming out of your phone? You couldn't tell it was directly behind it. I just don't understand how you guys went the whole movie and no one knew where it was coming from. My wife left the theater twice to get someone in the, and someone like that works there to come in and deal with it. They were walking around the theater with flashlights. Like, they couldn't figure out where the sound was coming from. Multiple guys in like black shirts were coming in, like fucking detectives flashing their flashlights, trying to find out where this sound was coming from. That's crazy. I don't understand. I'm still like, don't understand. I don't understand how no one would know. Like, it's pretty easy to isolate where a sound is coming from. Well, I knew it was behind me and to the left. And it's like, I kept on looking back. But it's like, okay, is there a movie theater over there? Where does it hurt? Harry, given that so many people couldn't figure it out, I'm going to give Ron the benefit of the doubt. That's where you're wrong. I don't think we can just judge the sort of how, where the sound was coming from. I can play. I don't think there's any world in which you could play a song from a phone and I wouldn't be able to figure out where it's coming. Like do you guys not have ears that work? I understand. But like the entire theater was going through this. Like if you lost your phone and then you realized your phone's playing music, you're thinking of a phone that's not buried at the bottom of a handbag. You could cover the phone in a slam. And there's also a full movie with fucking Dolby digital surround sound. Like there's sounds coming from every direction. Everybody was lost. Sky issue, huh? Sky issue. It really isn't. They had their best detectives coming in. Hey, you guys had a bunch of fucking peeled out dudes that are on Xanax walking around with flashlights trying to figure out like they would didn't give a fuck. Their phones were probably on. Yeah, yeah. There's probably sounds like airing ads in. Yeah, it was so fucking frustrating. Did someone actually yell at the lady? Yes, the two ladies next door. One was like nicely yelling at her, but yelling at her and the other one was teeing the fuck off. But how did the ladies write next to her not know? They probably were like, oh, there's a pie theater to the right. Like they're, you're next to the sound. I get it right next to it. I get it. It was fucking how are you sitting next to a? You're sitting in the seat next to where it's coming from. You don't know where it's coming from? I get it, bro. That's insane. It was infuriating. Like I could see if you're a row in front and you're like, 'cause I probably would have been like, no, if it was right behind us, the people next to me would have said something. I would have thought that too. Yeah, or, I mean, that woman was with someone. The chairs are in pairs. It's pairs of chairs. They take the stairs in the chairs of pairs. She is no right to be teeing off. If I was the old lady, I'd be like, you dumb bitch. You didn't know I was playing this fucking for an hour and a half right next to you. Was she with friends? She, I think she was with, I mean, so it's you take the stairs to the pairs of chairs and you're sitting there and then you have somebody else that you're with. So you can't buy, take it basically alone. Someone else is on your slab with you. So there's probably an old man that also couldn't hear that was sitting next to her. I can't go to this place by myself. I mean, to be weird, because you're sharing a slab. Everything I do is weird, because I'm always by myself. What if you got the slab for yourself? I don't, you probably have to pay double for a double slab. How much is the slab? What if you're 10 pounds heavier than you want to be and you need an extra 20 pounds? 25 bucks. He said pounds, bro. Up to 25. I went to London. Yeah, yeah, true. Um, but, yeah, I don't know if you could go. But we got up to give her a dirty look and she's like older. She's not super old, but she's older. How old is older? I didn't, I didn't dirty. It was old enough where as soon as I started dirty looking, I had to look away from my, I'm not going to fucking bully this fucking geriatric hearing aid victim. I just can't believe that the people next to her were yelling at her. When they were, these were like Afro Latinos yelling at her. That's so crazy. Those are the best. Yeah, they were the best at it. Martinez yeah, there were two after if you could have elected someone in the theater to do that dirty work It's that's the reason. Yeah, yeah, of course. Yeah, of course. He gave his I just strong challenge to his Strongest warriors or whatever the fuck. Yeah. I don't know. It's that's that's a bizarre situation It was bizarre and it this but it's still I found the movie to be incredible. I found it to be a Genius Mm-hmm best movie best movie of the year for me. Here's what we'll do here. You and I will go together Cheris lab. We'll rent out the entire theater and then we'll place phones and then we'll put phones in all the empty seats I'll find them all try to guess. Yeah, who's yeah I mean if you guys want to do like an Easter egg scavenger hunt type thing I guarantee I'll find every time I think what I want really to do at some point on the podcast at this point because you're really bragging about your ability to like echolocate. Yeah, yeah, he thinks he's a submarine. Yeah Fucking fat I want to turn the lights down to movie theater lighting. Yeah, you can turn them off completely I'll put up a blindfold on blast. It'll enhance our abilities blasting other like movie sounds. Yeah Yeah, and see if you can figure out where the phone is. I love that. Well, here's here's two things that you're not being me around blindfold me Like a kissing era. Yeah, yeah, I'll find them. I think there's two things you're not accounting for one All the other people in the theater so there's gonna be like blockages and you're gonna it's gonna be a who done it It's like a game of guess who you're not gonna just have an empty theater and the other thing is you're trying to pay attention to the movie You're not trying to think about the phone. You're trying to ignore the phone But if the phone's going off for an hour and a half That's the whole I mean how long is the move three hours three hours? It's a fucking marathon. Oh my god It's like deer hunter, which I finished finally six days. I'm not kidding you six whole nights of watching it. That's how the Hanukkah was started That's what the rain. I didn't know it was that long. Damn Yeah, it's a it doesn't feel long But it is quite frustrating when there's somebody doing that. Yeah. Well, at least you got to watch the back half in silence Well, the second half is like a different like movie almost. Oh, do they make you move theaters? They rotate the the set. So you're seeing something completely different. It's a lot of more more showing than telling than most Nathan Fielder movies. It's almost more serious But like even if you knew the Elizabeth home story, you could never know this this story. That's presented in oh I'm excited. You need to know a lot about the Elizabeth. You don't need to know a damn thing work I don't really know you don't need to know fucking shit. I can I know the whole story tell him I know like the Tyler can you bring up the original story? No, I'm kidding. I'm kidding. Um, you should that that that doc is good though that one on Elizabeth Holmes is good. I also Listened to a podcast about it That was called like blood money or something like that. I don't know whatever they were that was also very good Well, it's like she like she like created a cure for cancer or something that she Convinced very high-powered people and fund raised crazy funding for This blood testing technique that she claimed could Detect diseases very early on. It was like a revolutionary product that didn't actually work. Yeah, and they fudged a lot of the results and science was completely dishonest and she Got a lot of people that worked at the company to like keep quiet even though they knew and It was this huge, you know, it got so far. Mm-hmm. Like they had how much funding did they raise built like five billion billions It was like a bill multi-billion many billion dollar company. I think she how much funding Theranos raised Um, I mean she had a that is a credit to her and like You can't only put it on her like if you're a crazy person One point four raised one point four and what was its to what was its valuation? Uh at its high point Theranos valuation Yeah, nine nine to ten billion. It was valued at yeah, and this is this is a company literally like Did you had a product billion that had not been proven? Yeah, you know, never a product Yeah, there was never and there was like half the size of a tissue box and it could do any type of blood test It was like an at-home blood test that could detect theoretically like cancer. Yeah. Yeah That's insane, but it's all theoretical. It's like if you got your if you got your app off the ground to If you had a sap at a 10 million 10 billion dollar valuation. That's what we're at right now, but like we don't have the money yet and it would also But that is the value yeah, yeah at its peak But if you had never if you had made as much progress on Creating a sap as you actually have yeah, but we're able to sell it for that much So it's like she pretty much had like the idea of like what if there was a at-home blood test that did this and then she sold it And then it didn't actually work or exist Yeah, so like Jerzy Jerry or like nicky numbers having the idea for disposable umbrellas and my friend Mike who had the idea of the clear toaster Yeah, yeah, they're just ideas that uh never yeah, it'd be like if It'd be like if Elon Musk before he had become proven had been like I've Created an electric car like those year to 60 and like 2.8 seconds But the Tesla didn't actually work. Yeah, yeah, it's like it's like Sam Altman and and you know made the company as big as it was basically without ever Showing anyone or what it actually does or having or having a car that that fucking worked. Yeah But it's it's weirdly neither her or Nathan Feet nor Nathan Fielder are the main character of the movie. Oh Weird hidden character people are so fascinated by her. I mean, it's her dishonest deep But also the fact that she like affected that deep lower voice. I think it people think she's like a complete lunatic, right? They think she's a pathological liar. Yeah, I'm like a sociopath because doesn't she still say that it works. Yes She will make it look like we're making a documentary about it. So that but you leave the You leave the documentary with questions. Oh really. It's not like it. It's almost like after that phone How did I not know it was a phone I really was telling my wife who's credits the end credits to like a Ninja Turtles movie in the next for an hour and a half Like I feel like that would fly for like five minutes But the same song started playing at like the 45 minute mark. It was like this It was like fucking Bastille or yeah, it wasn't even that though. It was a song. I never heard so I was like oh It's probably just the fucking you know the words to a movie. No, it was like weirdly instrumental in like I don't It was haunting. It was truly haunting. I'm quite curious about this song I'm gonna try that tonight if I go you're not gonna go see this I probably can't get it. I know it's three hours long. I'll tell you that. It's amazing though It's not like slapstick funny like no, not he's not slapstick, but like it's not like a laugh a minute like that Yeah, yeah, but it has a big laughs a deliberate pace. It's more like you're already knee slappers It's not knee slappers Because it was like a measured I don't know. I think he does want to find out the truth. Yeah, I think he's living with her Yeah, I think he that and really he lives with her and unprecedented amounts of access But how long was he living with her? Wow like a year. I'm not sure Maybe I think only like 40 days, but like the 40 days until she went to prison. It's crazy Did you see the fire fest guy Billy McFarland on kill Tony? No, he like came out and did a minute Never performed stand up before did he kill no, everybody fucking hates him Isn't that like the worst like isn't that like that kind of just makes stand-up seem like so lame the number of people who have hit me up And been like hey, man, I lost my fantasy league and I have to do stand-up comedy. Can you help me write jokes? It's like dude. I don't want to think that my career is a fantasy football That's what I mean like like this guy's like you were so bad at All that you have to do what I do for a living yeah, that's a nightmare. I don't want to help you with that It's like a little bit insulting and it's also like It kind of just sucks that it's like the thing that everyone once they've been the you know like You have however many washed out yeah like every single thing has gone wrong and now you're like I'll try this out At least I at least I can be racist At least I can go on kill Tony and say the n-word. Yeah, like that's like the last resort It is pretty funny, but for us that's like the first resort Yeah, I think it's also every guy who's ever like gotten a laugh at one point in their life Like I'm actually funny as fuck. Yeah, I'm actually super funny Hmm it isn't meant to like A lot of guys I bet 99% of guys whether they'll say it or not believe that they're funny. Oh, yeah, definitely I feel like you kind of have to I you know, it's funny. You say that and I mean this I don't think I'm I wouldn't say that I'm funny I mean that 100% sincerely. I I think I can be funny, but I'm not naturally funny at all I don't even know - You know what to say to that? (both laughing) - I'm not like, I have friends who just like go through their life and I can watch them and laugh. - Yeah, I agree with that. I mean, I would say-- - And I'm not like that at all. - Yeah, I never thought I was like funnier than any of my friends. - People hang out with me who have never met me for an evening and they were like, they often say they're like, you're, I really thought you'd be a lot funnier. But not in a mean way. Like they think that I won't be able to turn it off. - Yeah, yeah. - Aside from this stuff, I'm pretty serious. - Like you're like Jim Carey. - Correct. - They're making faces and shit. - Yeah. - Yeah. - Yeah. - That sounds like a living in a hell. - Yeah. - It really does. - Yeah. - There's having to have like a pun cooked up for someone else around. - I was a friends, I was a friends with a girl who was a writer on SNL for a year or two when he hosted. And she said that when he came in for that week, it was like the hardest work that the entire group of SNL ever had. - Jim Carey. - Yeah, because he just, he like made it impossible for them to get things done. - Really? - Like they'd be going through rehearsal and he would just like derail it and do something zany and, you know, hyperactive. - Yeah, yeah. - And couldn't like if someone was talking and being like, all right, everybody, now let's get set up and like go stand up next to them and be like mocking them like, ah, you know. - Yeah. - Or doing something. - I'd be brutal at like 4 a.m. - Yeah. - Still doing read-throughs. - Yeah. - Like, oh, Jim's on the floor again. (laughing) - Jim's got the mask on again. (laughing) - Jim just panced to the sound tech. There's another lawsuit. - Imagine being married to him and you're having like a serious argument with your husband and he's just pressing his nipple against like the glass of a window outside your kitchen or something like. - All right, Jim, like, we have to talk about like where we're gonna live. (laughing) - It would be funny though. Like it would be cool to be able to do all those faces and stuff that he can do. I mean, he's bringing him out mid-fight. - He's one of the most talented people ever to be in show business. - Oh, yeah. Without a doubt. - Yeah. - I think just harnessing that and pointing in the right direction must have been harder. - Did you guys ever see the thing where he did like, he like accepted an award at like some movie festival or something of the people thought it wasn't him? - What? - No, I was gonna say, when you said it's the best, I was like, there's no way we're talking about the same thing. (laughing) It's like, he accepted a, this was pretty recent. - Oh. - Except it's some award in like Europe or some shit and like they think it, people think it was not him. - Oh, I have not seen that. - I do remember that. - Yeah. - But he used to come on stage during like the VMAs and like, you know, costumes. - Oh really? - Like characters and shit like that. - That's fun. - I really like that award speech he, where he, or maybe he's just presenting where he's like, I am two time goal air winners. - Oh, it's hilarious, yeah. - I don't just sleep the sleep of any man. (laughing) I dream about becoming three time goal-themed goal winner. - Because then I would be enough. - Yeah, yeah. - Like it stopped this terrible search. (laughing) That's brilliant. - Yeah, that is very good. - Yeah. - People used to do shit like that. Remember when like Will Farrell came on at the Oscars or something? And he was like, like for, he said he, he was like with his kids and he was like, we were just at soccer practice. - Yeah. - It's classic. - Yeah. - That's funny as well. - They don't do it anymore. 'Cause fucking Will Smith had to ruin it for all of us. - That's it. - Kanye, Kanye first and then Will Smith. - Kanye didn't ruin it. He enhanced it. He took it to the next level. - He stormed the stage. - He took it to the next level. - To be nasty. - That was like 20 years ago. - Yeah, but that storm in the stage for Bits is funny. Storm in the stage to scare Taylor Swift and make it about you. - But he didn't like physically attack anybody. Like Will Smith did. - Yeah. I mean, I think that they're birds of a feather. - Would you rather be slapped? Or would you rather say your album wasn't as good as people thought it was? - I'm saying it's a slipper. He started it and Will Smith escalated it. - I'm just, but I'm asking now. Would you rather be Chris Rocker Taylor Swift? - Taylor Swift definitely. - It's a hard question. - The hard question? - It's hard to hear that question and not consider their lives and scope of work. Rather than just incredibly successful. - They're tough moment that they suffered at an award. - Yeah. - I thought I'd both billionaires, realistically. - I don't think Chris Rock isn't there. - Chris Rock isn't the rock. - Why are we going there? Where does he come from? Why is that coming in? - Oh, I thought you meant it. - Oh, you thought I was talking about Duane. - Yeah, of course I was. - Of course I thought you were talking. - I can see how you would mix that up. - No, I'm still on Chris. - Okay. - 60 M's they're saying, even though this is 60 M's. - Oh, he got divorced. You think T Swift has ever gotten divorced in her life? - I think she, there's a chance she's probably already divorced. - Don't say that. - You think 'cause travel like that. - 'Cause kill a draft like Shane's model. (laughing) - You like that Instagram post? (laughing) - No, kill a draft. That's two albums. - I saw that. Those hilarious people are tweeting at Taylor Swift with a screenshot of him liking it. It's like, what do you think? You think Taylor Swift opens up Twitter? I think she's on the everything app? - I think she could be. - Hell no. - Or she could be getting, she probably got a report of it from her security team. - Yeah, that's true. They probably print out Twitter for her. - It's handed to a bad news, man. - You're not gonna like what you see on page three. Kill the traps, gone rogue. - You think he's in the same house as her? - No. - No chance. - I think he's in like a tennis house. Out front, he's on the main property. - He's in Kansas City obviously. Do you think she's in Kansas City? - Hell no. - Where do they play yesterday, Kansas? - I'm not sure. - 'Cause she was at the game yesterday. - It's just probably. - People are, I think people are kind of like not, people don't really get as mad anymore about her when they show her on the games. - 'Cause they got married. - Yeah, she's a tradwife now. - She's a tradwife. - Yeah, it's like, you know, it's like being a dad whose daughter's boyfriend comes over. It's like, in my house, you better put a ring on it before you beat the shit out of her. - And now he can live in Punity. - Now you can do whatever you want. - Already folks, let's talk about Lucy. Lucy breakers are intense long-lasting flavor that actually satisfies bite down before use to pop the flavor capsule and unlock the full breakers experience. The satisfying click, a rush of new flavor, and a pouch that feels like unlike anything else. Breakers flavors are built to stay vivid from start to finish. Apple turns icy. 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The Venmo master card is issued by the bank or bank NA. - What do you think's going on with Justin Herbert? - I think he's not getting satisfied in bed. - Like severe depression or like what do you think it is? 'Cause like he's like, he's giving up. Like they're like the worst team ever. He's not on him. He's throwing missiles still. - He's throwing fucking nothing. - Your lashing 'cause AJ Brown is dropping everything that comes with the phone. - I mean, I didn't even think about that. But no, seriously, the chargers are like what the fuck happened? They're terrible. - Charger suck, Ram suck, Eagle suck. I'm at a point now where I'm pivoting to history. And I thought it was gonna be the Teddy Roosevelt book. River of doubt that I just started. And by started, I mean, I put it next to my bed to start. - On top of your phone. - But I really, I'm doubling back into the Civil War. - Oh, very fun. - Yeah, that's a fun one. - That's a fun one. - Yeah, it's worth having you pay to side yet. - I'm still thinking about it. I have a holiday five pack of questions. I'd love to ask you guys about the Civil War. - I'd love to answer. what you guys think. Um, I don't know if my if I've really like, it's it's they're hoping it. They're open ended. Uh, do you think that there was guilt free slavery? Do you think that there are people who didn't know that they were doing something wrong? They thought it was naughty like having a donut, but defensible or was there actual guilt free slavery going on? Oh, I think that I would, I think that the majority of slave owners just viewed slaves as like not only property, but like a birthright. My publicist said I'm not supposed to talk about this. I think, I think they, they convinced themselves that they were probably almost like helping the slaves. Yeah, probably. This is a more civilized environment through for them to work the next, what's the next question? Carl Marx wrote letters about slavery. Oh, do you think that they had opinions on our war? Like we have opinions on Israel and Gaza where they're commentaries who are actually aware of all the generals in history, like Douglas Murray and Dave Smith and stuff. Or, and if there's a civil war today, what would be the smallest or most obscure country that would do a protest for us? Mm hmm. Are they protesting on our behalf if there's a civil war in the US today? I don't know. I don't know if they are. They protested for fucking against Donald Trump. They're protesting right now in the entire world did. But if we had a civil war, they're like in like Germany, they're protesting about like Donald Trump. They're protesting in like a weird ass countries. Yeah. If there was a war here, people in some countries would be like, stop the war on the fucking north or the south. It's probably true. Yeah. Maybe maybe, yes, people would have very strong opinions. I'm sure. What countries? I mean, the question was, we had to pick a country. I would say, England would have strong opinions. England, of course, maybe I was trying to have strong opinions. But they would have another day for them. I'm going to go Canada. Is the smallest country? Oh, that was the it was we had to be the smallest Venezuela, maybe. All right. Next question. What if what if the what if the south didn't have cotton? For more deaths, Eli Whitney or Adolf Hitler. Oh, man. These are quite the questions. If the north were able to grow cotton, would they even have strict morals about slavery? He's your own questions. I'm just wondering, is there a chance Abraham Lincoln was black? He was six foot six, strong as shit had coarse hair. His dad left. He was baptized. There were accusations of infidelity. Is it not possible that Abraham Lincoln was black the way logic is black and maybe he's on a mission to save his own people? I mean, that I like that one. I definitely like that one. That's definitely possible. Do you guys just never think about shit? No, I've thought about that Abraham Lincoln being black. That's that's kind of a common one, right? Is it people have their theories about that? Is that true? Yeah. So it's going around. Yeah. You're not the first that Abraham Lincoln might be black. Well, I think logic said that. Did he actually? No. I've never heard that. That's pretty good. That was good run. It just makes me wonder. It's just it's nice to think about. It's nice to listen to some history podcasts when you're turning off your brain about football. Totally watch some YouTube videos about history. Yeah. I mean, football is just like I like it and I'm watching the games, but I just don't know if I'm going to do the whole like four screen red zone thing anymore. It's a lot. It's kind of like dopamine dump. You know, I'm trying to maintain my dopamine through through what? Trying to keep it smooth. I'm not trying to dump it all at 1 p.m. I want to get dops in. Yeah. I think that you're acting like and by a p.m. I'm depressed. You're acting like you're you're giving up scrolling. You're giving up football, but like what are you doing with your time? League of legends. I was telling I was telling the guys, but when you guys were like walking around that I've been playing League of Legends on my laptop because I've been traveling the last three weeks and on Saturday night I was playing and I had I was laying in bed with a keyboard on my chest and then the mouse just on the mattress. And I was just laying like this. Oh my God. Jesus. Like two hours straight. That is dark man. It was a Grammy at a great time. You just didn't engage a single muscle except for your fingers. Yeah. Yeah, just the fingers. It was like 1 a.m. or peak relaxation. It was 1 a.m. at an Airbnb. Did you have any acid reflux or gird? No, no. My gird is actually been very, very manageable lately. Good. I was worried about healthy. Signed up for the gym. Well, you signed up. You joined a gym? I did. The book next year bed. It is. It is. Yeah. What's what gym? I'll never say. Well, what you can you say like is not like crunch or something? No, no, it's not a franchise. Okay. So is that one in your neighborhood that's connected to the strip club? First of all, there's no strip clubs in my neighborhood. That I wonder if that's true. I know. It's true. Yeah. I know where I live. There's no strip. That's not there's just a strip club on the corner. Can we look up whether are there any strip clubs in Astoria? I would assume there's a strip club in Astoria somewhere. There's a complete reneging. Astoria is a very big neighborhood. Well, you said your neighborhood. And look, there isn't. NYC Gentleman's Club. And where's that show? Where's NYC Gentleman's Club? All I see is Queens. Gentleman's Club. Brooklyn. No, it's on the BQE. That's the dress. These are all. It looks like a fucking sequins. Sex offenders registry. There's so many strip clubs. You might actually live in the most strip club part of New York. Hell no. The most strip club part of NYC is like first or no. What does it like ninth have? Yeah, all the way over by the west side highway hustlers is and you're driving in your passing strip clubs. What's the Olympia/South Beach thing? Because I thought that was a gym that's connected to a strip club. Oh, is that what you joined? That's what I was talking about. You went for the two-for-one special Olympia/South Beach. It's an Olympia gym with a South Beach strip club connected. Yeah, that's where I'm going. How did you guys find it that easily? It's doing a pull workout. Yeah. Now, the gym that I'm going to is not a strip club. Glad we could clarify that. I also have not gone. So maybe it is. Are you trying to tell us that you've been doing those pole dancing workouts? Is that what you're doing for the core? Yeah. Solid core. You guys doing solid core? No, I haven't been able to with my knee. I'm trying to get back into it. What was that noise? Did you hear that crack? Yeah. I was able to get back. Back's just gentle like light squatting today. So you were squatting in the gym with like, I feel a little risqué now. At the risk of my physical therapist, he said, "Oh, you're in PT." I've been in PT for 11 weeks, bro. I'm on my 12th week of PT. How many weeks do you have to do? To fucking like late November? Oh, that's brutal. Yeah. How many times a week? Twice a week. Oh, I'm trying to get back. That's so brutal. Imagine adding something to your schedule right now that's two times a week. I'd be devastated. Like that's another thing. I mean, I'm in there. I would be like, can you just like give me the list of shit to do and I'll just do it at my house? Yeah, but you don't do it at your house. He's doing you have to. You don't have a choice. No, you want to get to court. Yeah, but people just blow their shit up again. People don't do the PT. Like the average American isn't going to do the PT, especially if left their own devices. I would never. I would just do it myself. I'll just ask chat. Chat, fix my knee. I don't know. Grock gave me a great rundown of my PT. What's your PT? I'm working on my knee. Hey, I think you'll appreciate this. A buddy of mine that I played a bunch of golf with this weekend. He, I don't know where he got this idea, but he decided to start a pest control business. Oh, love that. And he's doing it. Like, you know, this is a well-to-do kid from a well-off family guy. And like, it's just him and his partner right now. And his partner was unavailable. His partner normally deals with the stuff. Yeah. And so he had to go and cut down a wasp snest. Oh, is he is he gay? What would what what's the difference partner? His business partner. Oh, okay. I genuinely thought you were talking about like his wife or something. And that's why I was asking. I was like, why would his wife be going to cut down the wall? Like, that feels kind of backwards now. Making his wife go chop down the wasp nest. That story just fucking whipped your ass. Well, him being gay makes way more sense now. So his gay boyfriend had to go cut down the wasp nest. Or no, he did because his guy was I don't even, I'm not going to try because his buddy was going to move forward. We're going to move forward. No, I do want to hear about this. He's been telling me amazing horror stories about these early months of the pest control business, but he made the point. He was like, it's a recession proof business. Oh, yeah, definitely. Cockroaches don't care about the economy. No, they, if anything, they thrive when the economy is down. That's right. Yeah. No one can afford cock. Certainly not his partner. No, no, no. Yeah. Okay. Anyway, the point is he told me that the grossest thing he's seen so far is that he went somewhere and there were, they had set traps. And in one of the traps, they caught two rats. And by the time he got there, there was one rat. And a tail. The rat had eaten, had killed and eaten the other rat that was in the trap. That's so fucked. And rats will just eat each other. What is in a rat tail? That actually just gave me like the, he'd be like, I just got the chills. Apparently the, the rat tail is like the shrimp tail of the rat. Even rats will be like, there's no meat on that. Oh, that's disgusting. They ate the bones, but wouldn't eat the tail. Have you ever seen a rat trap? They're like this big. It's like a, it's literally like, it's like the Theranos machine. I, when I, when I was having the mouse problem at my last place or two places ago, I went to Lowe's to get like the wooden mouse traps. And they had the rat traps and they're like, it's like a, it's like a piece of plywood. It's what I said. It's like this big. Yeah. It's fucking massive. Like if you stepped on it, you would lose your foot. Why? Because they have the wooden ones. Oh, and it has spikes in it or something? No, it's just, it's literally like a steel pole. Oh, it fattens. You know, like a regular mouse trap. Yeah. I know what people use for rat traps. They don't use it. I was thinking this was like a case like the rat wanders in. It's like the big black box. Okay. But they, they make the traditional wooden traps with the spring loaded. Yeah. Exactly. Yeah. And like they have the mouse traps which are like this big. Yeah. That ones are like this big. Wow. That's crazy. Yeah. It's disgusting. That's crazy. And it's like spikes on the inside of it. Like when you have a rental car at the airport, you can't back out. Yeah. Yeah. You know, rats can't back out. Did he say anything about German roaches? Um, no, but, um, I'll ask, yeah, I'll make sure to ask. I wonder if you could do a pro bono walk through a hairy spot and just see if we, if we really are free of them or if there's going to be like, oh, no, that's a fucking bulbous tumor of a, of a roach. I have to confess you saw one last night. Oh, yeah. Yeah. It's so cocky. But it had different, different location. The sink. Oh man. But it was, but I think it was because I was away and I had to run the sink. You know, they say that they come up the sink. If you're like, if you go away for a while, do they say that? Yeah. They say that. So I'm hoping that it was just like a one time thing, but I have to reapply when I get back. I did it. I did a light spray last night. A light gassing. Did you get the one that you saw? Oh, I mean, comforted it. So it died for 30 seconds. So it waited. Yeah. That means you breathe at least 15 seconds of it in. Mm hmm. I can't even handle like half a spray of Cologne and he's just fumigating his entire apartment with the first one. I've seen the first one. I'm not strong enough. That was the first one I've got since the last time we talked about it, when I put the cock in, when I laid my cock down, I'm happy to hear it. That's, uh, yeah, that's pretty embarrassing for all the shit you talked. You basically done a victory lap every week since then. But I've also been the same roaches have just been out of sight. No, no, no, because I've been seeing them in the trash room. So I really think that's where they're coming from. But I'm, maybe I'll email the building and be like, can we do something about the trash room? Or do you want me to do it? You want me to get in there? Cause I will if I have to put the trap in all spray down with the pill and I got a gallon of spray, the literal gallon, where do you keep it in my closet? Oh my god. It's got an automatic pump. Oh my god. Close. Gotta plug it in. Yeah. Charge it. It's probably like not even safe to have that in your apartment. No, it says it's good for indoor use, but you could just have it like sitting next to you and concentrate. It's not sitting. It's not like I put it next to my, on my bedside table when I go to bed, but it's just in your closet. It's in the closet. In the closet with the door closed. I don't even smell it. It's probably radioactive. Francis, do you ever see critters upstate? Oh, that's a good question. This was really interesting. I think it was Friday night. I took a nap on my couch for three hours. I don't know how that happened. How do you feel about that when you wake up from a three hour nap or are you feeling good or are you like, what the fuck? Not, didn't feel great. Yeah. Very disoriented. You feel robbed a little bit. You're like, what's fucking eight o'clock? I miss the day. Yeah. Well, I had had a big day. That's why I took the nap. Hitting the bottle? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Right. I woke up and I was like, man, I'm hot. I felt hot, but I had slept in the couch. So I went and I just opened the door and I have that sliding door to the balcony, so I opened it a pretty good amount. I was like, that feels really nice. There's a nice breeze coming in. I think it was Friday. It was warm. 70 degrees up there. Yeah. So I was watching TV and my door was open. But I was like mosquito seasons over just about, like I don't think that bugs are should be flying in too much. Yeah. Out of nowhere, I hear what sounds like a fucking helicopter fly into my place and I'm like, what the fuck was that? Like a locust? I go over and I look at the wall, a praying mantis had flown in. And you have to legally feed them until they're 18 years old. That's right. That's my responsibility to find out about like private and public school. That's a wayward team, yeah. And I was like, oh my god, that thing is, first of all, awesome. Praying mantis are fucking cool to look at and they eat with their hands kind of and you ever see one eating like a, I don't know if they'll eat big, big bugs. Yeah. They'll eat every piece of them, except the tail, of course, it's like the shrimp tail. Yeah. And so I was like, why don't I kill this because these things are awesome and I'd really respect them. So I thought for a long time, took me a long time to think because I was very high. Drunken high. No, not drunk anymore. I slept off the bed. Oh, okay. And then I was just high. There's no way I'll get to sleep unless I really take some, some pots to the fence. Yeah, yeah. So. What time did you wake up? 3 pm. You really did wake up at 8? Yeah, it's up from 5 to 8. Oh my god. See, that actually, I would say, is the worst because what are you going to do? Like, go back to bed, just going, taking a nap when it's light out and waking up and it's dark out. That's like the most disorienting nap. Maybe I should add that I had woken up at like 5, 30 a.m. to drive up to get an early tea time. Oh, okay. Okay. So I decided after a long time, I got a cereal bowl and I went over to the wall and I put the cereal bowl over the praying mantis. How scared were you? Not that scared. A little bit though. Well, a little, but it wasn't afraid of me at all. Wasn't reacting to me. It wasn't skittish. It knew that it was protected and alpha. Yeah. And then I had a piece of paper and I slid the piece of paper behind the cereal bowl gently creating a seal and then I flipped it and I went out to the deck and I released it and it flew away. Oh. That's amazing. I felt really good about it. That is good. That's an alpha move and you show the alpha who the alpha is. I also felt like I had solved a puzzle. Yeah. I think that shows that you're ready for a dog. Oh, I was high. Yeah. Yeah. High would make it even scarier. Yeah. It was it was it was challenging and with the bowl did the ball go back in or did it go in the washer dishwasher smart. I'm not eating praying mantis that's more because you know, a lot of people would put that right back in. They would. Oh, yeah. Who? Bums. You would. Do you probably have the the Germans fucking frolicing in your bowls? Hell no. No, Chexmix right on top of the Germans for a while. I'm not eating Chexmix out of a bowl. This guy found the German in a cinnamon toast crunch. Yeah. Do you do that? Do you put like all of your snacks and like containers? No. How about you do? What do you mean? I bet you do. Like, do I take the cereal out of the cereal box? You're a clear container house. No, we don't have a hundred percent. We don't have enough room for that. Lucky charms in a clear container to make it look classy. I mean, we'll put them in a plastic bag to you have like a writing on it. This is like lucky charms. - I think that I'm like Kendall Jenner. - Yeah, yeah. I wish. I mean, hopefully like there is a time in my life where I have a walk in pantry. I would kill for a walk in pantry. And not just where you can like open a door and observe the front of it. I want to be able to turn a corner. I want to go to close the door while I'm inside. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. But it closes behind me. My cousins used to have a walk in pantry when they lived in Illinois, and they had the best snacks. I used to go in there and just close the door. Just have a feast. Just wedge a chair up underneath the door knob and they had a lot of gushers. What are you doing in there? Oh, jerk it off. We're really just going to town on fruit by the foot. Yeah. It was always something like that. They had like fruit by the foot, but it was like dots. They were these like circles. Oh, yeah. Yeah. I know those stack them on top of each other. And then you get one of all of them. You know, Halloween's on a weekend this year. Is that so? For like the first time in a while. It's on the 31st of this year. All right, Rico. Get your own jokes, bro. Did Rico say that? He says it up. Come on, bro. This is like a day one Bosco bit. I've never heard that from anyone and I didn't know Rico did it. So it makes me laugh that Rico does. Thank you. Well, did it make you laugh when I did it? No, you took it. It's nicer to know that Rico does it. Are you guys going to be it? Are you guys going to have stuff to give out on Thanksgiving? On Thanksgiving now, but Halloween I might hear it's going to give out roach skeletons. Yeah, you could have chocolate covered roaches. Yeah, roaches. I'm getting a buck eyes. I'm about to make some buck eyes for our next show. I'm, uh, I am not going to be giving out candy this year. Why? Um, just seeing kids be that happy with their parents makes me sad. What are you guys? What are you guys? Do you guys live in a neighborhood where he are coming to your door? No shot. I do. I mean, people come to my floor. That's what I feel like that's so depressing. Why? To be a kid in New York and you're like, all right, looks like we're going to hit the third floor now. Wait a minute. Yes. I have been outside in two hours. I agree. But yes, but there's two flip sides. One, you can hit 150 homes in one building. Secondly, a neighborhood like Brooklyn Heights has the best trick or treating in the world. Period. Period. Clock soccer. It's like a, I believe that it's like a 10 block radius Halloween party with the most insane decorations and commitment and candy. And there's thousands of people and I walked at this morning. These all these houses are minimum 10 million dollars. They are hiring like Hollywood and Broadway set designers. You're really going for this year. You are going for it. It's like we've never go for it every year. Now this is different. No, it's not. You should see the Halloween spirit in the story right now. I mean, it just have never lived in a story before. What? You've never lived in a story before. You don't know what it was like last Halloween in the story. This year in a story. They're really going. I'm just telling you guys. I've never seen it like this. A lot of people. A lot of people have those really big skeletons. Yeah. Those are fun. Those are dominating studio. That'd be cool. You're around a little spooky. Yeah. Yeah. We won't. We won't do it. Do you see any good horror movies lately? I watched The Witch. The Vitch. Oh, is that the Blair Witch Project remake? No. They're doing a new one though. Did you see the witch is the A24 one where it's like it takes place in Salem, I think. Oh, cool. It's it's I did. Did you see Hookam with Adam Scott? Correct. Yes. I believe it was a good. I don't remember. We'll get that thing. Fight to Nick. Oh, yeah. I've got fights had one. There's an apartment. That's fucking insane. I mean, they are very good. That's a great decoration. Imagine the amount of blocks you can hit. They shut down broken heights too for it. Really? And they play the movie Hoke. I'm on a big rock. They like drop down a sheet of spooky ghost. Yeah. And they project Hoke. Every year they play Hoke. Yeah. They've been doing it. I mean, since I moved there this year, it's Adam Scott and Hookam. I mean, look, I would love to, you know, be someone who puts out a ball or maybe I stand there and I give out, you know, treats or tricks, depending on what they ask for. But no one's going to come to my door. I'd be actually pretty alarmed if they did. Why won't anyone come to your door? Because we're inviting is possible. No, I live in an apartment complex. No one's coming to my door. Have you gotten a message from your building saying, hey, let us know if you want to be one of the apartments that's eligible for. Oh, no. Are there kids in your building? Yeah. So why wouldn't there be trick or treating? I think they're probably just going to go outside and do it. You know, I have to say, this new building you're in is a lot more boring than your last one. It seems like things are a little more people in in their own homes. If they are roving. Yeah, there's not a lot of wandering. Yeah. There is occasionally a dude will like play soccer with his kid in the parking lot, which is kind of annoying, but why? Why is that annoying at all? How does that affect you a little? You don't drive. I guess it's right outside my window. And I don't like seeing kids happy with their parents. No, but it's a little irritating. It's not like, you know, I'm not, I'm not emailing the building about it, but like, you know, they put a boot on my. What would you say? They put a boot on my car, because I parked it there for, or am I not even my car? They put a boot on Hertz car, because I parked it there for like four hours. And we got kids playing soccer in the same place. So it's like, are they paying for field time? It's a tit for tat fairness. The way that I see it is like, if you're going to put a boot on my car, then no one should be allowed in the parking lot unless they're paying for the parking. Like, I don't know. You fucking Grinch. I'm a little bit of a Grinch. Yeah. You're very Grinch. I also don't think that those are the same thing at all. No, they aren't. Like it'd be one thing. If that kid was parking like his go cart in there, and they weren't having an issue with it, I don't have it. I really don't have any issue with it. I think you do because you raised to the point and were specific about it. No, I was kind of just referencing it. I mean, I was really the only thing I could think of when I see people outside of their apartments. You're just talking to the roaches, honestly. I'm talking to the roaches. Does a story have good trick or treating? You need the best in the world. You need stupes. They say it's the best in the world. That's weird. I heard that about Brooklyn Heights. Yeah. They're saying it's between Brooklyn Heights and a story right now. The story has enough houses where we actually, we don't celebrate home. We celebrate the day of the dead. Get it? Because they're all a lot of Hispanic people in a story. Well, you say that. I thought it was Greeks. Greeks as well. A lot of Egyptians as well. A lot of Egyptians. Little Egypt. Oh really, there's a little Egypt in the story. So I'm trying to say Dumbo was you boys wouldn't know anything about that. There's a little Japan in Dumbo. I heard that. I saw that. It's probably just there's a Japanese dude that lives in Dumbo. Exactly. Oh, we must be in little Japan. So Japanese guy just walking outside. Yeah. Whoa. My name's Craig. That's so I didn't know they had like a little Tokyo here. That's so cool. He has a New York accent. I was born here. He's Korean. Son of a boy dad is brought to you by our friends at DraftKings. You think DraftKings isn't available where you live. Think again. DraftKings, an official partner of the NBA is now available in all 50 states. So wherever you live, follow your favorite NBA stars. Get excited about the biggest matchups and lock in on those buzzer beating moments. Now with DraftKings, it's all in one app. Plus new customers get three months of NBA league pass on us. So you can catch more NBA action anytime, anywhere. Download the DraftKings sports app today and use code BoyDad on DraftKings. New DraftKings customers can spend five and get 200 in total bonuses. Plus three months of league pass on us. That's code BoyDad in partnership with DraftKings. The crown is yours. Personally, I cannot wait for the NBA season to return. Really excited to see those Philadelphia 76, those new look sixers. Sounds like you're going to be good too though. Let's hope they never seem to be bad. But I do not know that we can stand up to you guys this year. No, it's impossible for the Celtics to be bad. And I know that and I've accepted it. Point is, normally I wouldn't care to watch a sixers game. But with this incredible offer from DraftKings of three months of NBA league pass when you use code BoyDad, I might catch a gamer too. Again, in partnership with DraftKings, the crown is yours. Bed with DK Sportsbook. Gambling problem called 1-800-Gambler. 1-800-Myreset. Connecticut called 888-789-7777. Visit ccpg.org. On behalf of Boot Hill Casino and Kansas. Bettax Pass through may apply in Illinois. 21 on over. Void in Canada. Event contract trading with DraftKings predictions involves risk of loss. Availability varies. Predictions offer Void in New York. Bet to get bonus bets that expire in seven days. Trade to get predictions dollars that expire in one year. and rewards issued every seven days, be a click to claim for 21 days, one non-withdrawable reward redeemable NBA league pass auto renews until canceled terms at dkng.co/audio limited time offer nationwide based on sports book predictions and free-to-place sports contest availability varies by state I tried to go to the the the the place in Dumbo that has a Kase I've ever gone there, Kinjo. No, but I saw that it recommended on that same video that I saw. And I went there and we thought that we had an Omakase reservation and it was for just the the bar until we couldn't get Omakase there. It was fucking devastating. That's tough. It was fucking brutal. No big oyster. I didn't get the big oyster. I didn't get anything. We went to a different restaurant. The big oyster haunts me. The idea of it haunts. That was the point. I'm glad I'm glad it hit you so viscerally like it is like just the description of it. Yeah. You have to cut it in half. It was really bad. It was really bad. It was like a cyclops like that's up there with Rat Tail. Like it's like if you were to make me pick and you were like it's the Rat Tail or the big oyster I mean like that's tough. Just flip the corn. How big is the rat? Yeah. Yeah. Just fucking kill me. Just shoot me. Those are pictures of the big oyster. Can we look up the big oyster? I want to see it. I want to be just disgusted by this. I don't want to see the cross section. I want to see it cut in half. I want to see the left. Japan like Omakase. I mean that's pretty similar. That one on the second. Oh my god. Yeah. That is actually repulsive. Oh my god. Look at that bottom center to left one. How big that booger is all the way to the left. It's like you know what it reminds me. That's what it was like. That's so fucking gross. You know what it reminds me of reminds me of when people eat like like ostrich eggs. But even that's just egg at the end of the day. Yeah but I don't want anything that's bigger than it should be. You know what I mean? Like if I'm going to have eggs because I want normal sized eggs. I don't want one massive egg. Like what's another example? Because people eat this and they're like yeah it just tastes like egg and it's like yeah but it's not. It's fucking ostrich egg. And it's a huge. Yeah. That's like that's a dozen eggs right there. Do you know the most disgusting thing I've ever seen eaten was the balloon that Kb8. I think it was Donnie ate it. It's like a partially cooked fetus of a bird. It was Donnie that ate it. Donnie ate it. You open the egg and it's like the animal is like on its way. Yeah that is not a yoke. That's not his parts. That should just be illegal. It's really the grossest thing. Wait what did Kb8 on the yak on the hamburger? Yeah because that was that was one of the most. That was probably the most disgusting I've seen someone eat it was like a full like sea urchin or some shit. It was oh my god. It was like I literally I can barely I can't think I can even describe it or else I'm gonna start gagging. It was a mollusk. Oh boy. It was terrible. Francis it was in a bun. It was like a hamburger in a bun and then on the inside it was just gray. Oh boy that's that's tough. That's what he got super wet. I can't believe you guys were you guys were just used to be on this show. That's amazing. Wait. Oh yeah because you know if Kb's having a reaction like this it's bad. Why was Kb some professional eater? No but he's like but he ate it bro like that's he's got to I think he threw up. That's a big ass bite. Oh he can't even get his teeth through it. Oh my god pull. Oh my god. That's really bad. That's really bad. He brought it though. He brought that cover in his face and shame. There you two are. Just like a sorority girl in the walk of shame. Have you seen these guys the the group of like seven black friends that go to airport lounges or they're in the airport gate and they do like you have to go wear this shirt. Yeah. That kills me. The those two brothers right. Oh it's like six of them and they like have to wear a pair of pants. Yeah. That's super funny. Bad shirt, Laryll or something. Yeah. I'll come back. Everyone's getting into it like the people at the gate know it's them. Yeah. Yeah. It is very funny. Yeah. Have you guys ever seen the the the the the the end zone boys in the Titans? Yeah. Yeah. Those guys are funny as fuck. Yeah. It's just these like three dudes that just sit at the end zone and they just talk to each other. They say crazy shit. They talk to the dudes that have like that that are just in like sweatpants and they're like you're not doing shit today. I went down a rabbit hole. Everybody was yesterday. Have you guys ever seen the guy on my laptop, of course. I don't scroll anymore. The ostrich scrolling if you're on the laptop. Yeah, if you Google it. That's not a scroll. That's an intentional landing on YouTube shorts on the TV. The Australian guys who will eat like like a like a garlic like a club or garlic. I love that guy on the plane. Yeah. His eyes and nose are streaming. He'll eat like a knife or a ginger. Yeah. A picture is really looks bad. That's your it's like insane. Even just like a little hint of ginger. You're like, whoa. Yeah. Garlic is fucking terrible. He's just eating the onion. It's not coming out of his nose. Yo, he smells it first. He does this little kind of bite. And the guy who was left has to be like, am I seeing that? Imagine how painful that is. Imagine how much he like smells from like the inside. If I was ever on a flight like this, I don't know what I would do. Would you complain? I'd start laughing. I mean, you'd have to think it was a bit. Oh my god. But it's like, no one has spazed on him yet. Now it would be within your rights to spaz on someone for performatively eating a clove of garlic, a bowl, a full bowl of garlic. I feel like I almost spazed this week on the plane. I forget why. I've been flying a lot. Really? Yeah. It's the last three weeks. Man, I don't feel like I fly at all anymore. I think I flew four times this week. Tell us. Tell. Tell us more. The prices are through the roof. Through the roof. The Earl is so damn expensive. Earl is expensive. It's more expensive than ever. They cancel a lot of flights now too. I think they do it because they're not, I think if they're not like full, they just cancel it because it's so expensive to fly. Yeah, my mom's flight back from London got banks. Really? Yeah. Was it not full? I'm not sure, but they didn't even tell her. I had a flight that was like later in the night, like a couple, this was like over a month ago, but it was like a 10 p.m. flight out of like La Guardia or something. And I checked in and I looked at like the seat chart and there was so many open seats and I was like, this is definitely going to get canceled and then it got canceled. You called it. You're the plane whisperer now. That's what I do. If anything's about to happen on a flight, you can call it. That's what I do. We just, we just announced our roster for Bush for the upcoming season. The game comes out next week and then we're just right back to it when you mean the new call of duty and it's always going to, you always have to play the most recent one. Unfortunately, because they use it to promote the game. Who does Activision? Like hypothetically, like so this game that comes out, let's coming out right now, I hated it. Like they, because the beta comes out and you can play it for like two days and then they bring it back and they work on it more and then it comes out. The full game comes out. I hated the beta and a lot of people hated it and a lot of people were like tweeting like, why don't we just replay another season of Black Ops 7, which was the last game from last year. It was really good. And it was, it wasn't really good, but it was good and it was like, they could change the gun meta and add new maps and stuff and just make it like a new feel. Right. Of course. But apparently it notes just completely. It's not even like up for debate. Is there a consensus best Call of Duty game ever? I would say most people would say Black Ops 2 or Modern Warfare 2. Yeah. You probably played those. Well, I've just heard Black Ops 2 a lot. You probably, did you ever play like Cod 4? No. No. Because that would came out right around when Halo came out. Halo 3. I didn't, I was just, I needed to be in space. Yeah. Yeah. They're apparently, so the company that makes Call of Duty Activision, apparently they bought the rights to Halo. So they're going to make the next Halo. Whoa. Yeah. I dig that. In the Elizabeth Holmes movie, there's this like really tender sequence of the movie where the parents are spending the last days with their daughter before she goes to prison. And they know that they're not going to be able to have any access to her for like quite some time. And now I'm kind of feeling like that like has the call of duty seasons about to start with you first like oh, he's good He's gonna be gone. Yeah, he's gone freeza. He basically has like a eight-month sentence like training camp is coming to an end And yeah, it'll be pretty we're really not traveling a lot this year Because it's all almost all the tournaments are overseas and we're not going to them No budget who's running the budget this year? It's just like what like we could like it doesn't it just doesn't make sense It's not even like we didn't even ask it's not even like a budget thing It's like we could spend a ridiculous amount of money and all go to like Paris But then the problem is it's like once you're in Paris with the time zones We're gonna be going live at like 3 a.m. In America So it's like no one's gonna be watching that regardless So why spend all the money and go out there, you know what I mean? Yeah with the riots and with the riots the riots and everything Kind of an issue because one of the turns was supposed to be in Riyadh and then they had to move it because of a war to Paris which now Can't get a win. Yeah with the Saints game everything to move it somewhere else. Yeah Birmingham. Yeah Alabama. Yeah South Sudan The Myanmar Local tournament I'm pretty excited for it to start up again though. I've just had too much free time I've been like need I need something you've been scrolling and watching football. I haven't been scrolling but I haven't watching football All right I know usually when we get to the bush talk that means the episode's winding down All right, we will see you guys Next week we will be live streaming all weekend from all of our YouTube's and twitch accounts have just us playing the new game and watching some tournaments and stuff So if you have any interest in that that'll be happening Friday Saturday Other than that anything else fellas. All right, we will see you guys next week. Thank you. Goodbye (upbeat music)