106: PH Mickey Ds with Mike Lawrence | Soder Podcast | EP 104

Hey everybody, I'm on the Golden Retriever of Comedy Tour. It's been an awesome so far. Friday, November 7th at the Empire Theater in San Antonio, Texas. I'm gonna have a hell of a time. I'm excited for this show. November 8th, the Paramount Theater, Austin, Texas. One of my favorite theaters in the country, this shit rules. I got to open for Hannibal Burris there like 10 years ago and I loved it. Came back, did it apart in his moon tower or guess what? I'm back, baby, with a full new hour. Gonna be with Brendan Sagalo and Matt Ross. Have a hell of a show. November 8th at the Paramount Theater, Austin, Texas. Part of the Golden Retriever of Comedy Tour. Go to dancota.com to get your tickets. Go to dancota.com. Don't go to Google. Don't be an idiot. Dancota.com. It's for the best deals. People don't realize on the road that that's such like a fill for people is just playing video games. That's why I love my steam deck. I just download all the wrestlers do now and then everyone's like, oh, we used to party. I'm like, yeah, and then you died. Remember everyone was dying at 35. Yeah, wrestlers now live too old. And then they're like, got their say in opinions where you go, I think you took to me church. Yeah, now waiters to say that we could have tipped a little bit more for, for, you know, so they could feed their kids, but they know that they're not our kids. Yeah, that's got to be that. Do you think that was the most fun time to be a professional wrestler? It was like 70s 80s. No, he was horrible. I think it was one of the worst times to be a professional wrestler. You more than like so like when they do that, oh, the good old days thing. Oh, it's bullshit. Well, because nobody respected you. Yeah, you know, the schedule was the worst. Insane. No video games. Yeah. You said video games said you cocaine. You know, there's like stories of, um, if you read that book, American scream about Bill Hicks, he got like super into Nintendo when it first came out and would like take an Nintendo around with him and you're like, amazing. Oh, that what a, what a forefather, because we all do that now. You should forget. He was what, 32 and he died. Yeah. So he would have been and that was 94. So in 85, he would have been 23. Yeah. So he would have been like. Yeah. And it was right when he quit drinking that he got super into video games. Yeah. Hey, that's how it works. But I mean, oh, everyone says that they want to see comics like that. Now when I go, I don't think you do. And they're sad. Well, I don't think it would have been the thing that people wanted. You know, it's the most powerful thing in the world is someone who can leave. Oh, my God. It was so great. We were at the, I want to, I have a fantasy of letter in life, leaving and having a beard like yours. Just living off the land with a dog. Yeah. In my lady. Just live in there. And a fucking poor. Are you saying? Well, once I get divorced, I'll be living with a dog that is my lady. And I just call it Lady Dog. That's why I always love when you see Stone Cold talking to his animals. There's nothing better on the internet than watching Stone Cold talk to a cat. Unless you're one of his kids. And you're like, oh, you got all the time in the world for the fucking dogs, but you haven't. Can we hang out? It's got a suck. Social media watching a deadbeat dad. Yeah, you never think about that. He missed another birthday. Stone Cold, Stone Cold. I would love if he has a family. No, I don't. If they, um, I can make these jokes, right? The show didn't sell. Yeah, I mean, the show salt. It just didn't get made. Having a deadbeat dad now with social media must be so much harder. Watching their stories. If you see your kid watched your story, you're like, ah, fuck, I posted. I was at the water park with my new girlfriend and my son saw it on my, like, I couldn't imagine growing up with my dad and checking social media. And like in the 90s and seeing my dad being like, hammered at the bowling alley again. And he's got like a fucking Steve Winwood song story. I mean, I know someone like who abandoned a band of that boy. And the whole thing was like, they're like. Yeah, but they're probably doing this and this. And I'm like, no, they're not. And and it's like it's pretty nice. They're not. They're not doing okay. You know, they, they need to do it. Okay, because there's a lot of narcissists, right? Who need to believe that? Like, like, well, I had to leave my son because I had to leave. But also because I'm a great person and they're not their life must be terrible because I wasn't around. Sure. But then there are people who I put that mic in front of you. There are people who end up. Still having great lives. Sometimes, you know, to spite their family. And yeah. But you know what I mean? But it's like you can see it's like, yeah, do you do right? I mean, I know I would go as far as I know a lot of people that had abandoned fathers that did fantastic. Yeah. And it's probably because of that. Well, it's, you know, it's interesting like people will ask like, you know, we have an adopted son and like how transparent are we and all of that. And besides the fact that he genetically just don't look at us at all. I mean, yeah, you're raising a, you have a, for those that don't know, Mike and his wife adopted a, a, a black child. Yes, you got a black son. Yeah, yeah, which is going to be awesome. Yeah. Yeah, I mean, you and so he wants to watch wrestling. And I just had to be like, wow, we should skip this and this and this. And this is my racist. Let's watch WrestleMania six. Maybe not Piper and bad news, bro. Well, the guy just come out half black. And he's like, I'm a whole Kogan fan. You're like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, you can't be. You can't be a Hogan fan. Okay, fine. I like the ultimate war. You're even worse. I can't like any classic wrestlers because you're like, there's just, he's like junkyard dog. And you're like, okay. And I don't know where you're going to have a nuance. He wasn't like, oh, yeah, but black queer and does make the world work. But I mean, you haven't, you were saying that you have to explain to you. Do people ask like how to, I get crappy comments. But, but I was going to say was that with social media and 23 and me and all this stuff. It's like that, that generation of adoptive parents who, who lie to their kids. All it did was end up breeding resentment anyway, just not being honest. If I found out, but now it's so easy to find out. Yeah, because now you can just do the testing and go like, yeah, but it's not like you're an NBA player ducking the financial responsibility. Yeah, it's like just people are finding out. I didn't even think about that. That now people are much more open with adoption. In the 80s, they were like, like, if your son was like, am I adopted and you're like, no, yeah, he's like, I'm black. And they're like, well, that's the best. No, you wait till they're like 13 and tell them they're from planet Krypton. Yeah. If you add in mom, we're so dumb that they can only make a baby size spaceship. It's all we have is this junior spaceship. Yeah, that's like a sketch. I would have right is the mom being like, you couldn't have made one big enough for us. He's like, no, I mean, I just couldn't think of one that could fit me you. No, just me and the kid. Not all of us. And he's like, you know, you're a little bigger than you think. Oh, wait, well, you're not your fashion. But then you think if Kalle and his mom make it to Earth, single mom, her trying to date with Kalle, and he's like, hello, Kalle, I've heard a lot about you. And he's like, I'm going to zap some. Having Superman is your stepson and she's just snoozing a bunch of like guys to death at bars. She's just like, I bang guys and I just rip right through like that element of the boys where they like in the comic where they like fuck people to death. And he's like, I've gone to like six step dads by the time I was 10. Let me just tell you something about my pussy paper never beat dry. He's like, I'm going to come and she's like, I can handle. Well, he actually paper does beat Robert. You know what I mean? You know exactly what I mean. And his, yeah, I never thought about the spaceship and Superman is only built for a baby. Yeah, it's the toughest thing. No wonder the civilization just was destroyed. He just didn't have the thought to maybe build a couple different spaceships. And they're like, oh, damn, you know what? We only got the baby one perfected. Well, because then Supergirl ends up on a adult size spaceship and she's okay. How are they going to explain that crypto? Are you a fan of James Gunn taking over DC? Yes, yes, yes, yes. I mean, because DC was in disarray. Oh, as brutal. And I mean. What about the rock, though? What if seven bucks would have gone? He tried. He tried. It's hard. Look that story up. Thankfully, thankfully black Adam only made seven bucks. I mean, dude. If you read up on the rock. Are they trying to keep premiering at the, yeah, at the premiere yet is whiskey. Black Adam. Oh, yeah, it's, it's amazing because like, you know, we are the perfect intersection of like wrestling and comic fan. Yeah, like I understand both worlds. Oh, yeah. And the fact that the rock tried to book a superhero franchise, like a wrestler. Yeah, it doesn't work for me, brother. Where he was like, where's the big shazam coming? And he's like, no, not some mid-carter. Yeah. And then he's like, I got to work with the top guy. I got to work with Superman, but it's like, but it doesn't make sense. Like, you literally say shazam and turn into black Adam. And you're from the shazam comic, yes. And he goes, yeah, brother, I don't know. Did you not know that was what happened? So black Adam, they wanted a cameo from Superman. And DC was like, we're going to give you shazam because you're in the shazam world. And they wanted him to debut in the shazam movies. Yeah. And he was like, no, I got to work. And he's like, no, I want the top guy in DC. Give me Superman. Yeah, yeah. And he made black Adam a babyface when black Adam's a heel. Yes, yes, yes. So that's also the most rock thing. Maybe the best part of them. movie is that I never watch the shout out Moammer though he was in it. Yeah. Yeah. Good job, Mo. Get that check. Yeah. Yeah. And watch Mo on Netflix. I'm just plugging Moammer shit right in. No, he's fun in it. But no, it's, um, that's, that's a great thing is that you can have friends in bad movies, but they're good in the bad movies. So when I asked him, Oh, Henry Sbrowski's in a couple that I was like, that one sucked. And he's like, it was fun to make though. And I mean, Sharon Stone was, you know, my autism. It's like, I can't lie. And I remember Kumail was like, what'd you think of a tunnel? And I was like, you were great. And I was like, I did it. You did it. I did it. He's, he is great. But you're learning. Yeah. You're learning. You got to understand Mike and I go back 20 years. You were one of my first friends that I made in New York City when I moved here. You and Dan St. Germain and I outside stand up New York doing an open mic. We're all wrestling fans. So we ended up just talking about pro wrestling. Here's my specific autism. We met on January, January 8th, 2007 at 530 PM at New York Comedy Club. That's exactly what I moved to you know, Tino, uh, and I moved here. I moved to New York. January sports was the host. Yep. I moved to your January 6th, 2007. Yeah. My first open mic was January 7th. I also went to January 6th. The, the more important January 6th. It's when I stormed New York. It's when I went after New York. No, I tell people this story because I also too tried to hang Mike Pence. But that was when I was moving here. He was just an upstart fucking congressman in Indiana. But Mike and I have known each other. No, so we met that, that we met that day because we, there was both of our first open mics ever in New York. And now I tell people the story because we didn't see each other again for like another two years. It was like, like, you went on to do, like, the clubs and, and barking and working at clubs. And I just did every awful open mic. You would do 10 a night. Yeah. Cause we'd bump into each other occasionally. We'd bump into each other. But it wasn't for a while. It wasn't. It was like, we didn't hang. Yeah. Until the creek. Yes. And then the creek, we all started going to the creek. Yeah. And that's when you and me started, in fact, you came over to my house in Queens to watch UFC. Yes. Yes. Yes. We watched. I think it was Brock Lesnar. Yeah. It might have been Lesnar Mir. It was not. No, it wasn't. It was 100. Yeah. No, it was, it was another. No, it was the rematch. It was Chicago. I believe it was a chick Congo fight. But was it against Lesnar? No, no. But you came over and I remember it was against the tall Stefan Struve or whatever. I had that seven footer that looked like the alien is Romulus. Yeah. But I remember hanging out at the creek. And then I remember you pulled a move where I was like, I'm a, I could be friends with this guy where you had an empty 20 ounce of coke. Yeah. And you just went behind the bar and filled it. And then you put it in your backpack. And you're like, let's go watch UFC. And I was like, I fuck with this guy. You did that. I was like, that's our great move. And then we went to my house when I was living, you say that as if I had a choice. No, but I, you know what it was? It wasn't that I thought you were, I thought you were doing it because you needed the soda. Yeah. I was like, what a brilliant move. Yeah. Yeah. I would have just gone, ah, I'm out of money. And this is an empty soda. But you were like, watch this. I forget, I think I might have been Roho was bartending or someone. And they were like, all right, go ahead. And then you go, body, head body. And you go body. Yeah. But I think you were the first person that I knew that discovered that autism. Yeah. And then it all made sense. Yeah. You were a person because I mean, you know lots of people with it. But I'm the first one who discovered it. You are the first person who with lots of people flew kites with keys. I'm the first person to get stuck by light. Yeah. You've been Franklin, baby. But I remember because you had a wheelchair on, we get our own Almanac. Yeah. You were, you were doing a woodshed. Yeah. And the, the criticism of Mike was, as you just said, you couldn't lie. Yeah. So people would go like, was that a good joke and Mike would just go, no, I need to be like, it's, it's a weak premise. It has no setup. Like in a way that actually was helpful. Yeah. But a lot of people didn't take well. A lot of people that weren't good at comedy couldn't understand that criticism. Yeah. So they were just like, but I was always like, I loved it. That punchline and you go, it's below you. Like you're being easy punchline and we'd be at the pit and you'd go like, no, that punchline's below you. And I'd be like frustrated with Mike. I'm like, you know, fucking. And then when you were like, I'm autistic. It's like, make sense. You could see things much clearer than a lot of people that were wrong. It just took me 11 extra years. Yeah. I could see everything but my own autism. What is that? What was that? Was that like a relief? Oh, yeah. When you found out. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, I did it because we were in the adoption process and I was like, you know, lots of people were like, oh, I'd say three out of 10 and sufferable people who say, hey, I'm just who I am have autism. The other seven are just insufferable. Have you ever heard Michael Chase joke about mental health in the black community? No. And he goes, there's a lot of people going around that have mental health problems, but there's calling themselves Gemini's. Yeah. He's like, I'm just a Gemini. He's like, no, I think you got some deeper issues. It's fucking great. I'm fucking up that punchline, but it's a great. I remember seeing Michael Che at the creek and he did this bit about how, you know, the planet is fine, but we're fucked and he gets off stage and I go carlin. Yeah. But he was, but it was great because he was new. He was brand new. Yeah. Maybe that was like a year in, but like he was like, thanks. Like some people hated it. Some people were like, all right, they don't do that now anymore. No one does that anymore. No, I try to do it to another comedian recently and they were upset. I went, hey, I just want to let you know that's like a sign felt bit from like mid 80s. Yes. And they were like, okay. And then still doing it. And you're like, ah, shit. Yeah. And then what's funny is that then they'll do the bit on a special. Everyone will say that in someone will be like, well, how did no one tell him like, we did. Yeah, he's just ignored it. Yeah. Yeah. Well, it is. We're in the age of like that doesn't matter anymore. Doesn't matter if like, oh, Richard Jenny had a similar or like Robert, you know what I mean? Like, there's like jokes where you're like, there's been decades of standup. People have gotten to the same thoughts. Yeah. Well, actually was that Richard Jenny's estate sale the week at three killed himself. And I actually bought most of his jokes. I can do them. I know. Have you seen Lawrence very Jenny like it says he had a cameo in the mask. But that is, I mean, that's got to be very satisfying to find out something like that. Oh, yeah. It was comforting. Yeah. It was, you know, it was interesting too, because it was like, you know, I talked to my wife about it. And she's like, well, yeah. She's like, I'm the only one who needs to know and I always knew she always knew. She always knew. Yeah. Yeah. My mom like, was your mom blown away? Yeah. I think parents take that kind of shit personal. They really took it personal. But my dad was cool with it. My dad was like, yeah, I'll probably messed up too. You know. Yeah. Yeah. And then I get it from me. And my mom was like, I didn't know you weren't supposed to smoke when you were pregnant. That's so she's like, the labels were so small. That's so fun. It was the best. I don't know. I went bungee jumping like six times into a second trimester. It was perfect because I was like, I want you to watch because yeah, this was one level on the spectrum was coming out. Sure. I want your watch level on the spectrum. I think that this will help you understand me and she watches and she goes, those parents are so brave. Yeah. Oh, you're making it about you. Yeah. You know how you can't stop with your bullshit. I can't stop with my. Yeah. So we're even now. But there is that is gotta be like because I think so many people want to be diagnosed now because life is hard. Yeah. So they just want the easy. Yeah, to put the work is the thing like you have to do the therapy. You have to like actually like it's nice when people say like, oh, you are more mellow or you are nicer because it's like, if I noticed an immediate change that at the time after I saw that you were much more, you know, what it was, you were much more comfortable with yourself. Yeah, because I've known you for a long time. The thing was you would always be uncomfortable in a way where like Mike, you don't have to be uncomfortable. Yeah. And after I saw you get diagnosed like that, you're like, now I'm this, this makes me understand me. I mean, to be fair, Stefan Schruve beat cheek Congo and cheek Congo didn't defend himself. I would have ever right to be uncomfortable. Yes, absolutely. You would have every right to do that. Yeah. And also I wasn't living with Vecchio yet. I think I had like two random roommates. So it was just like two random guys watching UFC with us after coming back from like a late creeper. Oh, my buddy Vic. Yeah. Yeah. He's losing weight now. That's great. He's looking great. That's great. I got him tickets to shout out Pat Buck. Yeah. Because either, you know, I just remember seeing him 15 years ago and either he lost some of the weight or he was going to lose all of it forever. So I'm glad the no, man, he did, he did really fucking good. I'm really proud of him. He's like a brother to me, but he's a sweetheart. Yeah. I got him because of Pat Buck. I got a Pat hooked up tickets for all in because Vic lives in Texas now. Yeah. And I texted Vic texted me and he's like, look, these are the best seats I've ever had. They were great. They're like five rows back from the ring. And I asked, I was like, Pat, thanks for hooking that up. And then Pat wrote, uh, it's cool. I just told them he was a former luchador and because Vic's Mexican. But he's like, he's big. He's still big. And you're like, that's so funny. That's someone was like, this guy is a luchador. Yeah. Yeah. Was that Matt TV? He was LSO wipe-o. Yeah. But it was awesome. It was like, it was funny thinking like, oh, people might have been Treating them different things like hello sir You know, he's like cool. Hi. Yeah. Yeah, but that, um, man, that's crazy. You remember the date we met. Saint Germain had like that's part of my autism. I have very specific memory of Saint Germain was where our note is Matt McCarthy was also they were they were doing a show at standup New York after our open mic. It was a Montreal audition, I think that that that that day. No, it wouldn't have been it was January. So it would have been. And that was that he said New York comedy club. That wasn't here comedy. Yeah. Yeah. Well, that was that Monday. Yeah. Yeah. Why do I miss places? Yeah. You know what? There was another time where me, you and Dan Saint Germain talked on the corner of 78th and Broadway about wrestling for like 40 minutes. Oh, that's what I'm thinking. Man, you really feel for those homeless people that I don't want to hear this. I don't even know if my thoughts are my own. I'm not gay. If I like visorous teeth, I just want to suck on them. Yeah. I was comforting Dan. Yeah. That's cool, Dan. Yeah. That, um, I mean, living in LA, you must see a lot of people that fake autism for clicks. Yeah. They're called agents and managers. Yeah. I'm so autistic for this. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You know, I get asked to be the, the, the detector. Really? Yeah. Do you make like autistic noises when you get closer to it? Are you like, Big, big, big, big, big, big. - No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, Yeah. My mic is going off the meter right now. It's $6 million man jumping. The original Steve Austin. He's got it. He's got the off. Definitely, definitely, definitely, definitely, definitely. But I mean, we're in the age of like people, I had a bit about it on my last special about people, self-diagnosing online. And that makes people like, I mean, I think that takes someone like you, who took years to get to that thing. Doesn't that cheapen it? Well, it's important that you're using that word because there is a privilege to getting diagnosed. It was not, it was not cheap. Yeah. So there are people who like don't have the means to do it. Yeah. It was $3,000. Jesus. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So to go through that process and everything. Yeah, that does, I think, soften my opinion on people that self-diagnosed. Yeah. Ultimately, like I said, it depends on the outcome. If you get self-diagnosed and then you're now just just defying all the behavior you had and doubling down and not trying to improve yourself socially or, you know, or try to help other people, then yes, you're an asshole. But if, you know, but they just want a license to kill. Yeah. Give me that license to be an absolute piece of shit. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, there are a lot of people that do that. Well, you know, it's it's interesting like, like in stand-up, I feel like there's a contingency of comedians and people who it's, I know, I know I'm going to be called a cock or snowflake or whatever for this, but I, I say our word, I don't use the our word because it has been ruined by this group of people who diagnosis themselves just so they can say it. Yeah. When they go, it's okay. I say it. Yeah. Instead of saying it, knowing that there's a risk that someone might be like, hey, that upsets me. Yeah. In which case you have to take the accountability to go, I'm sorry. I wasn't trying to hurt you with that one. So now I go out of my way and my act to never say it because it's like, I want, it's, it's, it's, it's the thing of just like, it feels, it feels easy too. It's like, you know, it's going to get a reaction. And then it's also a lot of times the audience just likes it because they're being given permission to say it. Yeah. There was a thing about when I did that joke because the punch line is that anyone that called that self-diagnosed themselves from a TikTok, which is called them retarded. Yeah. Yeah. And then I remember people being mixed on the review of that joke. Yeah. When I put it out, there were people that were like, I don't think you should be saying that. But then there were other people that were like, my child's autistic. I'm glad you're saying that. Yeah. Because I feel like it does cheap in their diagnosis. And it makes them. Let's see. Which had my clients would say, you're a better comic than to need to say that word. True. And I would have taken that and gone. It really works though. I know. Conor, give me a go. I know that Mike. The joke is murder. But no, I get what you did the next time you say it, you would have seen my head. Yeah. Don't do that. Yeah. I'm like, all right. Why am I a dead dog? I don't know. It sounds like a cool voice video. And by the way, I was basically just doing St. Germain. As a US entrepreneur. Oh, man. Call me when you can. And you predator trailers. Awesome. Yeah. That's right. He's my favorite thing about it. You ever realized sometimes the hunter is the hunted. Oh, man. We were both very close to St. Germain. Yeah. So I'm sure we both get the same amount of UFO videos that he sends. Yeah. You got to watch this. And I'm like, dude, I'm not watching a 45 minute video of a scientist talk about isms like possible. Yeah, well, that's how I know you work with him professionally. And I don't because yours are only 45 minutes. That's right. He says you like six hours. He's like, he's like, here for a while, you're washes, but also when you respond to my fucking emails. And I told him on his podcast, I was like, dude, there's his times where I don't want to know the world is either ending or and he's like, uh, get it. See, that's the difference. Well, I mean, he knows not to ask me to go on that podcast. Yeah. That's. I mean, you are a much bigger draw that I am. No, either way. It's what I would like to see your autistic authenticity face to face with him and Sean about aliens. No, they just have other shit in their life that they are avoiding and using aliens as a fun way to be distracted. Damn, you need to go on UFO podcast and just deflate people. I guess he goes, I should call my cousin that I have a talk to and tell you your mother. That's just that's what Mike does. You're just a UFO, you a follow just buster. We're just going there and you go, why don't you call your daughter and they go, all right. Yeah, yeah, yeah. All right. There's something out there. No, there's something in Parsipini. That has your blood and it hasn't talked to you. There's something from beyond the stars. No, there's something that was in your ball sack and what you need to do. Do you, do you like living in LA? Yes and no. I mean, you're a Florida guy. Yes. Which is crazy. Yeah. Like Mike is a Florida guy in the way of like you came up in a tough part of Florida. Yeah. Yeah. You came up, I mean, trailer park, right? Yeah. Yeah. That's why when people are like, they try to glorify it or whatever, you're like, talk to Mike Lawrence about that. Yeah. You know, what it's like. I remember I used to have a bit about waiting tables and this is my comedic autism that I'll show you. It was at Old Hanlands. Yeah. We were doing hot soup when it first started. Yes. And it was with Andy Haynes, Mark Norman. I think I know where this is going. And I did a joke about waiting tables and not it was 2008. So it was, it was after the dollar collapse and I was just waiting on Euros. Yeah. And I went up and had a great set, but I closed about waiting tables and it got this big response and Lawrence was after me and Lawrence went on after me and just went, you think waiting tables is bad? I worked at McDonald's and they just did six minutes about all the shit you saw at McDonald's and they got off stage and I remember I had a beer and I was like, well, I guess waiting tables isn't so bad. I was like, Jesus. Yeah. I mean, you worked, you worked at McDonald's before smartphones before you could just go go in the back and like, how long are you in McDonald's for? I was technically so my, my, I started May, May 16, 1999 to December 28, 2006. I had a seven years, dude, you got your doctorate. Yeah. Yeah. You got your doctorate. I had my PhDs. No. That's absolutely got to be the title of the episode. Yeah. I'm learning nothing. Yeah. Where did, did you do all the jobs there? No, no, because once you're, once, once they find you're good at something day to day, they keep you there. What were you good at? The drive through cash was my thing. So I went to college in Virginia for one year. So I left, but then this, the week that I came back from college, I just, I remember like interviewing. It was a different manager and the guy was like, yeah, here's your uniform. He's like, yeah, you worked here. You can work here. We need somebody. That was it. Yeah. And so the nice. You need a warm body. Yeah. Yeah. I remember. Yeah. The, the, the week that I started was around like when Phantom Menace came out. Yeah, episode one. And I remember complaining about it. My dad was like, yeah, you're not spending my fucking money on that shit. You're gonna go make your own money. Really? Yeah. It was your dad a Star Wars fan. No, just be funny. If you just didn't want to, you know, he goes, I'm against the prequels. And you're like, I know son of a gun to use my hard work and money to support them. Got them done gun guns. Maybe, maybe if they do a reissue of episode four, maybe I'll pay for it. Yeah. If Lucas adds effects to it, they're me supposed to think you need a fucking job. So you go work in McDonald's. Yeah. Yeah. And they found out that you were good. Now do you, do you think being good at the cash register was the Tism? Yeah. Was that here like, was that like part super bad? Just the tip of the Tism. - I didn't do that. - Ah, tip of the tis- - Yeah, I did. - Oh, he's a good counter. Put him on the registrar, he's got to be-- - Do you think McDonald's has a better system of recognizing autism than the American medical association? - Yes, because they were so-- - They were like, "This guy's autistic, put him at the cash register." - Yes, thinking like, you know how they recognize it? When you say, "Hi, I would like to work here." (laughing) - I figured the application-- - The application! - I figured they were like old gum shoes, where they could like taste the ground and go, "Yeah, "he's got a little autism, let's put him in here." - Ah, you signed your application with red balloon! (laughing) Welcome to the McDonald's family. - No, there was a woman that I worked with that they never gave her a raise to, but they gave her every free happy meal toy. And I remember telling her one time that she should ask for a raise. And my manager, he always called me "Mackel." - Mackel? - Yeah, yeah, so it's like the Mackel. Like, so like when Mackelmore became like, you know, a big rapper, I was like, "That's how my manager "would have complained about the director of Fahrenheit 9/11." - He's like, "Mackelmore? "Mackelmore don't know shit about America." - And he goes, "Oh, that fucking, "maybe Columbine was good for a Mackelmore." - Yeah, you know what was good for America, bowling and Columbine? - Yeah. - Keepin' score. But, so when you get hired there-- - Yeah, you do seven years. - Yeah. - Oh, yeah, so he, so I told her, like you should ask for a raise, and he's like, "Mackel, she is very happy with her toys." (laughing) - She's like, "We have a system in place "that works for both her and us." - Did you ever, now McDonald's, they're franchised. - Yeah. - Did you ever meet the owner? Did the owner ever come in? Or was it all just management? - It would be franchisey. - Yeah, so there was like someone who owned like five of them. - Yeah, and would he like come by to like look at it? - Oh yeah, yeah, there was like inspection day. That was like the one time he'd be like, "Please, shive." That's where I started, well, you know, I started growing a beard, but then it was like, it was like a defiance thing. It was this, it's this funny thing, like I stayed there so long and I never got promoted because I was like, "I just want you guys to know I could leave at any time if I wanted." - Oh, that was yours? - Yeah! - I'm like, "I'm not gonna leave this place." - I showed up 10 minutes late every day. - Damn, yeah. - But in free food, they gave you free food. - Oh. - Really? - No, no, no, I stole it. - McDonald's doesn't, do they give you a discount? - Half off. - It's not bad. - It's not good. - But it's not bad. - You're making McDonald's money, yeah. - Yeah, yeah. - So, what's the process of stealing it? Do you wait, what's the process of stealing it? Do you wait, I've always been interested about this. - Oh, it's the dumbest thing. - 'Cause you're out now, you're fine. You've written on successful TV shows. You're one of the funniest human beings I've ever met in my life. - Absolutely. - You got a great life. People know to bring you in as the fixer. Do you ever need Mike to write jokes? I'm telling you right now. We'll get back to McDonald's, but Mike Mark Norman and I wrote for Amy Schumer for the 2016-- - '15. - 2015 MTV Movie Awards. - Yeah. - And we would go into a room and write jokes all day. We did like a week of it. And they were like, to meet to all of us. They're like, hey, if you can get 15 to 20 jokes a day, they don't all have to be killer, but that's what we kind of do. Mark and I were on average hitting 17 a day each. Like, some days I would hit 20, some days you'd hit 15. Same with Norman. You know how you'd be like, ah, I don't know. And the fucking Lord would be like, I got 60. And we're like, all right. And then by the-- remember when we went up to steak? - Yeah. - The tans after that? - Tads with Neil Casey. - Neil Casey, shout out, Neil Casey. - Villain of the 2016 Ghost Busters. - Yeah. - You was the lady ghost buster of villain. - Yeah, he was. - Well, besides the internet. (laughing) - Well, that was the biggest-- - So he was a secondary villain. - Comment section was the biggest villain of that movie. - Yeah, yeah, the main villain was the slurs thrown at Leslie Jones. - Yeah. - I was just saying though, like that showed me in real time that I was like, holy fuck, Lawrence has an incredible talent for this. - It was funny too because I remember being in that room, you guys talking about the spots that you were doing later. And it was like that Simpsons when Bart sells his soul and he's in the raft by himself and everyone else has the souls pushing them and I felt like that. I'm just like empty and I'm not past it the seller. I'm not doing that shit and that shit. And so it was that thing of like I was like so angry in a way, Mark didn't even bring his computer. - No, he had to ask for paper. - Yeah. - He was one of those kids. - Yeah. - I at least brought my laptop. - Yeah. - Norman were like, "Hey, I don't know, can you?" - And I had like a couple writing jobs before that, and I was like, "What are you?" - Yeah. - "What are you doing?" And I was like, "Hey, I have a charisma to not need this." - He's like, "You do." - I mean, I think literally he came in and he was like, "Neil, can you rip me off a baby?" - Yeah. - But he did. I mean, he like filled it front and back with jokes. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - I mean, we did, I think we did a great job. You, what's funny is watching the monologue, was Lawrence's and then I got one in and Mark got one in. And we were both like, I saw Normie's like, "Yeah, we got one in." And he's like, "It was all Lawrence, but we got one in." But yeah, that was the thing, it was like I need, I need to do well at this because it's like I can't do what those guys do. - I mean, you dusted us, but that was so impressive to watch. - But then, but then ticket sales and that's like, that's like a different, I'm telling you right now, I'm in the room, pen to paper. - Oh yeah, yeah. - Holy fuck. And you were coming up a joke, so I was like, that's incredible. Like, you were coming up a joke, and I remember being like, damn, fuck. - It was cool. - It was cool. - I got hired because, I know Mark Norman was opening in for her. And I guess you guys were just friends, or-- - I had written on something she-- - Okay. - That she produced. - Okay. - I wrote on something that-- - Rachel Feinstein? - Yeah, I was one of the writers on Rachel's pilot. - Okay, cool. - So then I was in there because she saw me do a roast battle. And she came up to me and she was like, how many of those jokes did you write yourself? But I was like, I wrote them all, and she's like, "Okay, good to know." And then I got that job like six months later. - Yeah, I mean, dude, Rose Battle, you were a monster. - And then she ended up-- - You were a monster, didn't you ruin a friendship 'cause of Rose Battle? Didn't you get someone too bad? - Yeah, there's been that. - Like, people, he was so good at Rose Battle that people afterwards, he'd have to go talk to them, and they'd be like-- - I mean, Ralph, we'd never talked to me again. - Really? - Yeah, no, he was furious, yeah. 'Cause that was the one that they did on Comedy Central. - Yeah, in Montreal with all the industry. - God, and I'll tell you right now, dude. This is why anyone that's, if you're a young comic and you're watching this and you like right now or like everything is TikToks and all this, I'll just tell you right now. Stuff comes and goes. Roasting was so popular for like four years that like at Montreal, they were like, it was the biggest thing. They were like, I wasn't up there that year, But everyone was like, "It's the fucking biggest." And you came through or just levelin' motherfuckers. And that's what I liked 'cause I was like, released Lawrence. - Well, you knew me from back then. - Yeah, I mean, I've known him since-- - That was the same guy. - It's 2000, 2001. - And now you look at it of like being an autistic person - This guy's crushing everyone in roast battles. And you just see the thing. You're just saying the honest truth. - I want you to look me in the eyes when you say that. - You go what I can. That's his weakness. Eye contact. Eye contact and accountability. - No, I'll never forget. It was, yeah, but I was battling Ralphie. And it was the line that fan beat you on last comic standing. That was, people were always like, I was just a force thing. It was that the force thing. I'm like, no, it was when I brought that up. - That fan and his kickable pants? - Yeah, because my thing is, everybody has that one moment that bothers them so much that they can't get over. No matter how successful they get. - That's ego. - Yeah. - You just got a strike where their ego's stuck on. - Yeah, and you find it. - Yeah, and you fucking-- - And everyone has it. - Did you try to talk to Ralphie? - Did you after the brosco Ralphie, my bad? - Yeah, I mean, I try. And he, I remember seeing him at the store like a few months later. And I was like, hey, hey, hey, you know. Yeah, and then, you know, the day he passed, people were like, you killed him and this and that. - Really? - Oh, yeah. - Really? - I don't feel good at someone's dead. - Damn. - But at the same time. - I'll tell you what you should have done is you should have gone with the wave, not against it and gone like, so no one ever roast me. Like, that should have been like, I let that be a warning. - It looked so funny as the, yeah, I know. - Fuck, dude, Lawrence. 'Cause then you look, if you-- - Roast in peace. - Roast in peace. (laughs) - Oh, yeah. - I said to me next year, he's like, oh, he's like, oh, yeah. (laughs) But that, I mean, that's crazy that he wouldn't talk to you after that. - Yeah, I mean. - 'Cause you just hit his ego so much. - He was fear, well, it was that thing too of like, remember the day of, like, he was already like, cranky, clearly, using, and-- - Yes. - You know, and I remember asking him, I was like, hey, is there anything off limits? And he goes, I'm an open fucking book, and I am the kind of person, like, you tell me, then it's like, all right, I'll rewrite a set. That's fine. - But, you know what? That's like where you want to do that pause, and then have that Morgan Freeman vote over, and he goes, but he wasn't an open book. (laughs) - There were things-- - He closed the book. - There was a set-- - No one ever read it again. - I mean, that's gotta be, when you did the joke, at the taping, did you-- the crowd. the anniversary special where you can pause it and see his heartbreaking, you know, no wait, wait, look Lisa, you can actually watch his heartbreak. Yeah. You saw it. I saw it. You delivered it and you're like, I think about sometimes. Really? Yeah. Because it was that was it was that clean of a hit. Yeah, well it was like it was weird because at the end of the day like I love comedians and we are, you know, all we have in a lot of ways, right? The industry comes and goes in all of that. Yeah, the industry is hot on us right now. Trust me. It'll in five years that we'll be back to just being night. If you ever saw Buster Scruggs, like they'll leave the armless, legless guy for the chicken any day. That is the best depiction of show business that sketch. But no, it's to me was like it was weird because I was, you know, it was Montreal that are all these man and to be a part of someone else's screwdriver as a wrestling fan. That's tough. Yeah, the, um, it's not what I was going to say was Montreal has that energy too of the industry and all these people like pushing me and people who had agendas with Ralphie club owners, you know, executives are like, yeah, wait, I was like, I didn't do it for you. Yeah, I did it because I just want to be good at roasting. Well, it was like I did it because they, you know, they put me in a cage with him. Yeah, it's like a UFC thing, right? Where it's like, it's, if you're a UFC fighter and you see that the other guy is like weak, but the bell rings, you gotta get him. He's still coming towards you. Yeah, you're in a fucking cage. And I, so I don't feel was that the finals or was that? No, that was the, because you want it, right? Yeah, I want the tournament. Yeah. So my first battle was with Matt Broussard. That was great. Yeah, he's great. Yeah, he was. That's such a fucking great joke, writer. And I hated him at the time because I didn't know him and it's just when you look at him. Well, he was on, he was on the podcast and he even said, like, oh, first impression, you would have no idea that I'm a, I'm a math nerd. Yeah. And I just love like writing jokes. Yeah. He's like a true, he's a guy that I will defend is like a true, true comics comics. Yes. Yeah. Incredible joke, writer. And a person's person, a really sweet human being. He is. He's a good dude person. There were more funny people than good people. So we got to point that out when it happens. That's very true. Sometimes people hide behind it and you go, oh, that's why you're hiding behind you. Well, you see, you see when they're given the, the, the, the inch to stretch it into a mile and they'll take it and some guys are like, well, I actually do like women and black people. But so you, it was Broussard first and then who did you go up against seconds? Then Ralphie. So, so I, so I beep, so I beep Broussard. And it's, um, Mrs. Miss Pat and Ralphie. And I get the winner of that. So I had jokes for her. Yeah. And I had jokes for him. And you went first. How quickly were you, how quickly did the matches happen? Was like the next day or this? Oh, that was the same night. Same night. So they would do that. You did your battle. And then they did theirs. And then, and then you did yours. Ralphie was the next night. Okay. So they gave you a whole date. Pretty much right jokes. And I had, yeah. My last joke was the, the long joke that had the, you know, you had, I make fun of your weight because it's the only thing you haven't lost. Right? Yeah. So, so, and I remember it's like showing you a blade that you got to kill the guy with and you go, holy fuck. But it was showing because I was running it by people. And there would be people who were just like, nah, man, you know, it's like, I just feel like that's too long. No, you know, that's like a New York style joke that'll work in New York. But like, LA, you know, like, but we're not in. We're in like a mutual ground. It's like, it's okay. And then my thought, because I had this joke about Prasard the day before that I didn't do that was too long about his, um, dad having Parkinson's. Sure. Well, it was an act out. Holy fang, you know, and, um, you know, and, and, and, and the basic punch was, you know, and now he has a son who looks like he dresses at Abacrombian Twitch. And incredible. Yeah. Incredible. I don't even need the long version. Yeah. By the way, I'm just thinking if you like our regular person that works, like, obviously, a regular, but like if you're not a comedian and you work at a job and you have someone you hate, I would kill to hire you to like, hey, this is what I did. The customers all those years. Oh, what? So there's people that walked into a McDonald's and Florida. They go, that's where it came from. Yeah. The guy on the drive through cash register handed me my ass. Well, with no what I would do it, we would, we would play a game because I'm going through training. You're like, God. Oh, it totally was. It's slumdog millionaire. When he's answering the question and he goes back to that, I mean, it's true, but it's like, and I was bullied. So there's that. But when I was at McDonald's, so I take your order, and I take your money, then I drink it up. I take your milkshake. No, I had to clean the machine. I would not drink your milkshake. But I work it wise. Yeah, I love McDonald's. Yeah, even when it's fixed, it's broken. Much like the people that work there. So I saw, I saw what the customer looked like. Then the customer goes to that final one over there, getting the food. My job was to get the person that hands the food to break. So I start doing jokes. I start doing voices about the people that you just took the money from that I know what they look like. So in the time that employee does not know what they look like yet. So in the time they're going, window one to window two. Yes. Are you on a headset or are you telling them this in real life? I'm on a headset. And you're on a headset. You see the person. Yes. You use your super brain to fucking put a joke together. I wait until the window two sees them. Then I do the headset on the headset. And you hit them with their looking at them. Do you remember any specific jokes that you hit them with? Oh, yeah. I mean, well, there was like a catchphrase, like well, not guys would put a slogan. Yeah. Car tours. Car tours where people who were so fat, they're like send tours. But they're going to have cars. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Car tours are made to chase by calling someone a car tour and then in the headset and being like, oh, fuck. And then they pull up. Is there a fat? Yeah. Did you have people? So you had people break in front of these people? Yes. You would get them to break. I'm assuming. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. More than not. Sometimes, yeah. Was there ever anyone that didn't break where you're like, that was a good one? You should have broke on that. Because I feel like sometimes that's the thing with comics is when you have one that you know is good and they don't accept that you go, no, come on. That was a good one. Yeah. But then the but then it's like some people where they're like, I'll show you. And it's like, I respect the low power. Yeah. That's you must have been real fun to work with. I'm serious. I mean, I wrote when I started standing, but I was there. I wrote all my first jokes on receipt paper and and I would write about what I said. But the first joke that I did that people were like, that's a good joke was I come from a long line of alcoholics. My family tree has a car wrapped around it. That's great. I wrote that when I saw a guy with a bottle between his legs and McDonald's. Yeah. Yeah. That's great. Yeah. It's always fun when you see those jokes where you go like where you see like where it came. Like I did, I had a joke about on the last one about my parents being divorced and I talked shit and I was like a little traveling shit talker. Yeah. For them. And that was like one of those things where I'm in therapy and he was like, well, yeah, your parents interacted through you and you're like, oh, that's a joke. Like you just see it and you go like, oh, that's the absolutely a bit. Well, you just I just saw you last week and you did a joke. And I guess I I should have spoiled it. It was amazing. I was like, oh, this is what like what great comedy is where you said a secret out loud. Yeah. That's my favorite thing because I think sometimes we stand up one of the funnest things about it is you will admit to something and you'll hear someone in the crowd go like, oh, fuck. Yeah. I had a joke. I forget which joke it was on my last special on on the road. Yeah. And Katie and I were at Chicago Zanies. Yeah. And she was sitting in the sound of she was just with me for the weekend. And I did I was working out a joke. Yeah. And it wasn't working. But I did the joke and Katie watched a girl in the crowd hit her husband and go, you do that. Yeah. And she was like, I just want to let you know someone reacted like you do that. And that's all I needed to go like, so there is something there. Yeah. And then I like worked it out and you build it into a joke that like everyone can do. Oh, that was as funny talking about autism and symptoms and seeing like where I watch love on the spectrum like, oh, I do that. And I do that now. I talk about the things I do and I could see like. Yeah. Yeah. You know what it was was it was the joke about she caught me watching porn on a Bluetooth. Yeah. Because I left it in the shower and it was connected to my phone. Yeah. And it wasn't really working. It was a real story. I was just trying to find the punchlines in it. And this lady was like to her husband and she and then you're like, oh, a lot of because of Bluetooth. A lot of people have accidentally heard porn. They shouldn't have heard. Yeah. And that was like very gratifying. Yeah. Like, oh, that was the thing where it was awkward between Katie and I for like weeks because I was it was during the pandemic. And I was like, yeah, I was watching porn. And then you're like, and then you turn it into a joke. Yeah. But McDonald's, you must have seen shit where you were like, well, that's a bit. Yeah. A car tour or a fucking guy going through that might have been my dad going through with a fucking bottle in between his legs. Oh, I saw all sorts of crazy stuff. I'd be genuine like real racism, you know, a woman who wouldn't leave because we gave her a black Barbie. Yeah. She would someone say she's a hero and that's what and that woman went on to be a Marjory Taylor green and that's the rest of the story you filled on you and that little girl who now that's what's weird is like now I'm on her side because the Epstein list where I'm like you it's like wrestling where you go I can't believe they're tagging together they hate each other yeah but it is a common good they've got to stop this faction yeah it is like wrestling because Vince is probably on there too yeah I want people to know he's got a he's got a poop yeah all over their chest when you what was the day like quitting McDonald's did it feel like why we why did you leave to move here yeah and you got to do like that I'm moving to New York City yes so when I met you I was there less than two weeks before yeah and did you get was it satisfying yeah yeah it was it wasn't it was scary yes because I you know I didn't know what it was gonna be like here when I moved here was the first time I saw snow really yeah remember when New York used to get snow was cool we haven't had that in a couple years we barely get snow now yeah it just rains it's still brutally cold kind of it's not as bad as it was when we moved here like some of those blizzards yeah I remember going to like shows in fucking Bushwick it's like a blizzard and you're like why the fuck am I doing this I remember a blizzard where I took the train into the city and went to Broadway comedy club remember the world yeah next to it I was late but I literally ran through a blizzard and I was like there's no way there's a show and I got there and the guy that ran the show was like oh sorry man Mick Foley's on stage and I was like this feels like a nap nightmare and I walked in the door and that was when Mick Foley's first started doing stand-up it was for you it was a blizzard for him it was a fog of CTE yeah he goes well I went from the cage to here like not you had you had years in between then so when you tell them you're quitting McDonald's yeah are they like look at Mike go on Mike or are they like what the fuck are you talking about I used to do a bit about this is it was it was true it was it was one of my first bits when I moved to New York because it was I was like you know I told my manager and he was like Mackle so you know he's like you'll always have a place here and and then and the the punch I was like and I looked him in the eyes and I said don't you ever fucking throw it at me like that you know when I quit when I first got hired in radio when I was 19 I was like busing tables at Outback and I got hired at the radio station like I went to the radio station though like you're hired you're gonna start next week we need your training and I went to Outback with my shirt in my apron and I was like I'll only there for like four shifts and I was like hey I just want to give this back to you and the guy took it and he goes hey I just want to let you know I'm not gonna hire you back and you're like yeah I don't what I don't ever want to come back here yeah I hate you I don't hope I hope I never see you again but I mean that is like a lot of jobs when you say you're gonna do something like fucking move to New York to do stand up they're probably like well who's gonna who's gonna roast all the people on the in between window one and window two you know much but did you ever think about that about how bummed some people at McDonald's were that you weren't there making jokes because I'm sure you made work a lot easier for some people I think for some people I think I was annoying to other people yeah but that's fine but because there was a moment when I you know I was doing you know the bringers shows right we had to bring like 15 to 20 people so I did one at the hard rock Fort Lauderdale and some of my McDonald's buddies came and they didn't know what comedy club prices are but they know what alcoholism is they didn't know that about them 750 bud lights no yeah and that's in 2007 yeah we're talking about one but like it's normally cost about two six two dollars yeah three dollars yeah the bar that they all went to is what's called CM boomers sick that's what punk is now yeah yeah and that's is that's his whole fucking gimmick now yeah you're making like a Superman reference like this is but punk rock it's not like CM punk is now CM Boomer yeah maybe a bar with shitty beer is the real punk rock yeah yeah yeah CM Boomer yeah definitely but I mean it's so they went and they're like upset by how much everything cost oh yeah when the bill came because they didn't look they just kept out the fine and and I remember you know two of like the next day like you know you were funny it was not worth it damn it's like of course it was it damn and then so then when you say you're moving in New York are they like was anybody supportive yeah yeah yeah they all weren't like what the fuck are you talking yeah they liked they liked the act and I did it for you McDonald's jokes and they thought that was fun yeah you know and and it was I'd say there was like six or seven employees that came which was awesome that is great is there anyone from McDonald's that you still talk to no that you haven't it wins the last contact was it when you left and then it like yeah yeah I mean it was like when I went back for like but then the the one that I went to got destroyed and they built one like 10 minutes away and that's too far but but yeah my McDonald's doesn't exist I did bring my wife to it before they got taken down yeah you like this is where it all happened no yeah it was funny just like with the audit she's like yeah yeah I get you now so that was the moment in force come where you're throwing rocks at the old abuse shack we're here yeah then a dean got eight some reason it's weird and then like we had a bulldozed and everything's all right you know we adopted half black hailey jolas you're like is he like me and you're like what critical of wrestling yeah absolutely is he now that your son is getting older yeah yeah he's almost three yeah are you are you seeing is his tastes aligned with you at all does he love comics does he love wrestling he loves Spider-Man I don't know I don't know what like I mean I made the joke before I don't know how I feel about getting him into wrestling really yeah why because we both got into it since childhood I mean we both fan lifelong fans I know and look at us I think we're doing all right I mean yeah we're sitting on a couch talking yeah it's true it's pretty good yeah you could have gone a lot worse yeah but but my problem is that it's like there are like two or three moments where wrestling is as good as everything else you sure and then nothing else like that everything else that's just appointment yeah man you're saying like you get Cody finishing the story and then you have to wait years for like something else even then you get Travis Scott running in you know you know but but I'm saying it's like yeah like I am you know like it's interesting knowing guys like like Dan and we're wrestling you know uh sage or you like we're wrestling was our common thing right sure you also have football I know he likes football but like but then you find it like he also has aliens yeah like me you know for me my other thing is comic books sure and there are comic books that are literature there are comic books that belong in this Macedian like Watchman is a work of art right there's very little wrestling that I think deserves that that you think is that you realize like that yeah what now would you be upset if your son got into wrestling by himself or would you be like oh great now we can share it yeah I just I just like if he's like a leaven and he goes dad I really want to watch money yeah yeah also what about the figures dude I mean growing up with a figure dad like you yeah you and Greg Stone are the two biggest action figure guys I know yeah yeah so you I mean you guys have to be for for your son he has to be like what a jackpot oh and I let him play with them that's awesome he has his but he also has mine I love that he's like can I oh he knows though this got way more articulation yeah because he loves there's a there's a preschool spiting is amazing friends sure that he loves but he also he's kind of like discerning taste like he loves Paw Patrol but he prefers the movies to the TV show it's not enough gravitas in the TV show there isn't that's great but but but but the animation quality is way better they hire union voice actor you get to see his taste you go oh my son has taste yeah yeah yeah he loves like movies and your wife is artistic she's got like great taste and like yeah and like I mean you know artistic autistic he's got all these you guys are the statistics the statistics the my the statistics dude yeah yeah it's it's cool cuz like he also trolls me like you know he knows my favorite superhero is the thing but whenever I like point to him on a shirt they'll just go that's the Hulk and he got no it's not now and the thing is in like they did a Rasha Shana episode was the things Jewish it's like no thing he goes oh he's so sweet yeah that's really he's he's incredible man and it it's like I would never I'm never gonna be the person who tells people I'll have kids and all that but it is like it's the best like it's it's also it had yet the weird thing like my dad died three months after my kid was born yeah and so I got to be like I got all the other. all the introspection out of the way. Now it's just like the others that kind of like my dad in some ways feels like my wingman. - Oh, it's awesome. - I love that. And watching what it's done for you and Adina, especially it's like, you know, it's been great watching you become this guy that's filling an empty 20 ounce at a bar at the creek to a guy who's like a dad who I watch you with your son and he's like an empty 20 ounce of the milk for him. - Now you're exactly, you're gonna fill that up. But it's been awesome being your friend and watching you like becoming, you know, get diagnosed with autism, but then also to like embrace it and to grow from it. - To go back to the autism thing, you know, which we never really leave, do we? You guys that we kept calling me the machine and the more that I was working, the more people would say that. And even that is something I've had to like reconcile with because it's like mechanical, you know, where there's like an inhuman aspect. - Yeah, you're like, I'm a person of it. - Yeah. - I get that. - I mean, it was flat out us me and Mark people. - No, I don't. I'm not arguing it. I get it. It's a really sweet compliment. And I remember other people saying that you guys said that about me and that genuinely helped me. But it was this the fact that I kept getting it. I was like, okay, all right. Okay, I get it. I understand. I'm a person. - But as much as that, you know, autism is the writing that much, it's the, yeah, it's the McDonald's of like nothing's beneath me. - Sure. - You know, and it's amazing because you'll get writing jobs where other people are just like they hate being there or this and that. Like I wrote on Love Island. And I just truly just did that. - I did that years ago. - Really? - Well, you posted the picture 'cause you said they made seven seasons or something. - Yes. - So you wrote on season one of the American version of Love Island, this is crazy. So when they call you, they're like, do you just want to write on Love Island? And are you like, what do you give sluts things to say when they talk like, I don't know, how do you write for Love Island? - No, I'm the one who calls them sluts. - Yeah, no nice. - I write the V.O. - Oh, you wrote the voiceover. - Yeah, me and another guy. - Okay. - We were in Fiji, we're in this life. - You got to go to Fiji? - Yeah, anywhere your work is work. - True. - You know that. - Yeah. - You've performed some cool places that aren't cool because you're just there. - Sure. - You're there to work. - Yeah, yeah. And they're like, oh man, Portland must be great. I'm like, yeah, until you talk to a club owner and he, yeah, won't leave you alone, yeah, whatever it is. No, no specific one there. That was just, I picked the city and I picked the problem. - That's where I love helium. - Yeah, it is where I'm in helium. - Yeah, yeah. - It's where I filmed on the road, it's fucking great. - No, but it was, you're in the shipping container, we worked one a.m. till noon. And because it's basically live, noon is 8 p.m. the night before in the States, in New York. - And it was live. - It was close to it. So you would watch the footage that they filmed and then you're writing shows. - One a.m. till noon. - One a.m. till noon. - One a.m. till noon and how long did you have to do that for? - Six weeks. - Did that absolutely but fuck your schedule? - Yeah, yeah. - It was your going to bed at like 1 p.m. - Yeah, well it was weird kids like, but the time difference I had to remember. Like I had to call, like, I had the time when I had to call, like at, I would go to bed around 5 p.m. You know, and so that was like the last time I could like, talk to my wife before, I went to sleep and everything. It did, but it was also, it was cool in a way of like because you had such a deadline, like whatever your road was like, yeah, this is fine. - Yeah, yeah, you kind of got it, you had to piece, you had to let it go. - Yeah, and you're sometimes the hardest part is you keep wanting to make it better. Especially it was stuff like stand up. You're like, yeah, I can make it. - And my co-writer was really like that. He's like, we have to make it better. I'm like, we get to do the best we can and then we get tomorrow. Like, it doesn't matter. - I love that, I mean, that's a very great way to look at that. - I look at everything that way now. - I look at roast like that, I look at it because it's just, especially like you, you know, you get older, right? Like, it's amazing. Like, you and I have known each other enough where all we wanted and all we believed in and thought of was careers. And we got to see each other become people. - Yeah. - Because I absolutely agree with that. - And at a certain point, you realize like, part of the, you know, this is in America, this is in a lot of countries, but part of the whole, like, love your job, care about your job as a way for you to get taken advantage of. - Yes, 'cause when you go, you identify as your job. You don't identify as the person you are, you identify as the thing you're doing. - And now? - Which I'm very guilty of. I'm very guilty of doing that with Sandup Comedy a lot. - Oh yeah, they want you to be. - Yeah, because then they go, oh, and then they have a thing to go, well, you're not loyal to this thing and you go, well, I'm just being a person. - And the trick was down, like if a big name drops in on a show, it's like, well, we have to pay anybody. - Yeah. - We got the fucking headliner here for, you know. So then, so then when you realize, oh, I'm being manipulated and this and that, and you're just like, wait, let me just, it's all work. You know, my dad died. He was still working. I'm like, I need to like slow down, but I enjoy things. I take pride in what I do, but it doesn't define me. Like, if it's the most important thing I do in life is be Logan's dad, which I think it is, that's okay. Because, especially now, where you write on TV shows or you're starring TV show and they don't even exist, they take them off for tax write off. - Yeah. - It's the whole, it's like the whole background movie and fucking can it. - Well, this happened with wrestling, right? And CM Punk called it out. You get the workers to be Marx, because all of the wrestlers in the '70s, '80s and '90s were failed athletes and shit they came in, but they knew they're worth. - Yeah. - And now it's like, oh, why don't you do this and this and we'll pay you even less. - Yeah. And that is, they're very good at going. Oh, you want to be a part of this? We'll take less and we'll let you be a part of it. - Yeah. - Instead of you going, I know my value. - Yeah. - And I think I need to be paid like a human. - Yeah, so now I'm just like talking. - Everyone's been getting McDonald's. - Yeah. - That's what's happening. - Yes. - Everyone's been doing like that. - And it feels like that. - It's like, I, we're gonna mackle. - She loves your toys. - Yeah. - That's exactly everything. - And so the norm, yeah, I'm at these jobs and I'm like, why does it feel like McDonald's? - Yeah, stop giving me toys. - Yeah, I'm like, I know what it's like to be taken advantage of. - I'll steal this fish filet and you won't even fucking know it. - I mean, my leg will because I'm burning and I'm like, I beat the system. - Mike Lawrence, you're one of my favorite people. I'm very glad you came. - Oh, that's very sweet, man. - The Mike Lawrence on social media, right? - Yeah, yeah. - The the Mike Lawrence, Mike Lawrence comedy on some places. - Yeah, so I'm like, look him up. He's unbelievable, watch his stand up. He's the best. Thanks for coming on, buddy. - Thank you, man. That was sweet.