In this episode of *America’s Top DEI Podcast*, hosts Jennifer and Angie (Pumps) share grievances and stories. Pumps complains about parents letting young children order for themselves in restaurants, causing long waits. They both reflect on their own past disruptive behavior with kids, including a memorable incident where Pumps’ daughter vomited into a bowl of chips at a Mexican restaurant. Jennifer then recounts a gym confrontation where her husband Josh stood up to an aggressive man, praising his blend of toughness and vulnerability—contrasting it with political figures like Pete Hegseth and Donald Trump, whom they criticize as fake and weak. The hosts read listener reviews, one of which leads to a discussion about explaining “pegging” to an older relative, and they share a humorous story about a grandmother finding anal beads in her son’s room. A news story about a woman mailing a 32-page binder to her ex’s new girlfriend sparks debate on whether the act is psychotic or aspirational. The episode also features ad reads for Shopify and Chewy, promoting their services. Overall, the show blends personal anecdotes, political commentary, and humor, maintaining a lighthearted tone while targeting hypocrisy in the GOP and celebrating moments of authenticity.
[MUSIC] So we're supposed to start the podcast. Ready, one, two, three. Patriots, patriots, patriots, black patriots, brown patriots. We love you. All the Maga fascists can do what, pumps. So go! All right, welcome to America's Top DEI podcast. Pumps, what have you had it with? So there's been so many things lately, but here's my number one thing I've had it with. Right now as we sit here. You know, an hour will be different. Not it when you go to order, like where you're standing in line to order. And somebody has a bunch of little kids, because now kids are out of school. And like each little kid orders, and they don't know what they're ordering, and it takes an infinitely longer time than if the mom just said, chicken nuggets with fries or whatever. The kids like, you know, talks about the toy, and I just had it. Just like until your child can read fluently and speak fluently, order for them, save everybody else, because I just get sick of all these kids everywhere talking and making these flats longer. I follow questions. You mentioned chicken nuggets and toys. Were you at McDonald's when you sat down? No, I wasn't, but I'm just saying when I had children, it was gracious enough when we went to McDonald's every day to order their chicken nuggets and toys. That's all I think I could think of. But you also did your kids homework? Fair. You got to see. Where were you? What kind of restaurant was this with all these kids were? Like one of those walk-up order a hamburger places in Oklahoma City, and you walk up and it's like, okay, I want a grilled cheese. Do you want ham on it? I don't know if I want ham on it. It's just like how many kids are we talking about? Like they had sticks. What surely I don't give a-- One mom with six kids. Superbreeder. I think it was just, I think it was like a friend's. Everybody had friends. There's a thing. I completely agree with you. I really, I am not a lover of children. I like children on a case to case basis, the same as adults. But I remember when we were young mothers, and we would stroll into a restaurant. You had three kids. I had two. And your daughter was a chronic vomitor. Like, I mean, she was toddler, but you would think she would have been bulimic. She threw up all the fucking time. Everywhere we went, she's throwing up. I remember we were at this Mexican restaurant called Cheekas. We were the worst. We were the walking, breathing embodiment of everything that this podcast is about. We were the white women with the snot-nosed kids. And then just, and they were a nightmare. They were horrible. I'm sure we let them order. I'm sure it was a total stage five disaster. Yeah. And I remember at the tail end of it. There were people around us. Like, we were the only people with kids in there. It was a tiny little restaurant. But we don't go super early. And they were miserable. All of these people around us. Yeah. And I was like, excuse for us walking in anywhere. And in retrospect, with all those kids, I really hate us for it. There's no justification for walking. I think each kid had a front too. It was like a goddamn day trip from a daycare. It was pathetic. Nonetheless, everybody's miserable. And I start seeing people leave. And then the kuda-gra at the end was your daughter starts, like, she would always kind of like start coughing, crying, and then vomit. And we have like a bowl of chips on the table. And she just vomited right into the bowl of chips. And that's when I looked at you. And I was like, I'm taking my kids and I'm leaving. Like, we are terrorists. We are domestic terrorists. And we would go out at lunch to the pizza buffet. And dinner. So we did it twice a day. We weren't content during it just once a day. Because it's just when you have little kids, you just went out. You just went out of the house. Yeah, you have to get out of the house. You have to wear them down. And unfortunately, you have to punish others. Right. Because you're punished at home. And then you're like, you know what? I'm miserable. And I want company. And I'm going to go to a restaurant. And I'm going to stand in front of this late 50s attractive woman from Oklahoma. Me? 50s. Oh, sorry, Pumps. Mid 50s. And I'm going to bring six kids. And I'm going to let them take their time in Lolligag as they order. Yeah. And so I'm just going to say, I hate it for you. Because again, I like kids on a case to case basis. And all six of those kids that ordered before you just in the spirit of friendship. I hate them. All six of them. Thank you. You're welcome. But we do kind of deserve it with what we did when our kids were younger. Especially me with the throwing up all the time. Because it was the worst medical thing that she threw up. And then she got, she was a snot hole in threw up. Like she didn't get away. So she could do it on command. And so I punished. I'm saying she was like a Beliemic toddler on demand. It really was totally what it was crazy. All right. So I have a story to tell you. It's not really as much of a grievance. Because my life's so great. I don't really have anything I've had it with. Just kidding. Listener. We live in Trump's America. I could go on. But I haven't experienced. I want to share it with you all. So, Josh was in New York over the weekend. And we like to go exercise together. I've had it with couples that exercise together. Anybody who wants to probably that I'm 100% on your team. But we also know I'm a hypocrite about these issues. So Josh and I go to workout. And we're working out with our trainer, Darlyn Gal, who's named Emily. And we have a lot of people who are in the same team. And it really our trainer is going, "Josh!" And the guy goes, "In the guy like mumbled, judges, you can't be talking to people like that." And then Josh comes back and he goes, "I'm telling you, buddy. I'm doing you a favor. If you say that to somebody else, you're going to get your ass whooped. I'm trying to help you here." And the guy goes, "I don't need your help." And then he walks up to this other guy who's minding his own business on the incline, the "ab incline" thing. And this guy had some weights down there because he was super setting something. And this guy in the hoodie that just tried to pick a fight with Josh, who mind you is like 12 inches shorter than Josh and a lot smaller, goes up to that guy. And he goes, "You need to pick your shit up." So at this point, another trainer that works there, because the gym is like multiple stories. So this guy was like, "I'm going to go down and get the manager." So she goes down and gets the manager. And the manager comes up. And during this time that they went to get the manager, we had convened with the guy on the ab machine. And we had all determined that something was severely wrong with this person. Because I honestly hadn't even noticed him before. I sure as a fact, no, that Josh wasn't staring at him with all of those mirrors in the gym. The only thing Josh was looking at was himself. You know, I mean, there's just a zero percent chance that he was looking at somebody else in a mirrored room. Zero percent chance. And so then the manager goes up to him and Josh walks over to him again. And listener, you have to remember, Josh is a criminal defense lawyer. His clients are unhinged a lot of times. They are either in prison or trying to prevent going from prison, drug addiction, mental problems, etc. Josh has an incredible patience level and an ability and a skill set to deal with unhinged people like this. It's really remarkable and I hate to give him compliments because I do not like feeding his narcissism because I have to live with him. But this is super power. So while the manager is talking to the guy, Josh goes up to him again and he goes, dude, I'm serious. You need to watch yourself. You need to be careful. You're going to get your fucking ass whipped. If I was just a little bit more unhinged, you're going to get your ass whipped. And he's like, I don't need your help, Bob Law. And so the escrowing to another floor, nonetheless, I have to file a complaint. And then it's determined that the guy was following some other gal around the day before and she had filed a complaint. Really? Yeah. And so it's like, I hated the whole thing because I don't like, I believe in second chances. Right. But this objectively, there was something severely wrong with the kid. But I just want to tell you this. When Josh threw his weight down and he walked over him and said, what the fuck did you just say to me? And Emily was like, Josh.
don't. I was excited. It turned out. I was excited. I'm thinking that we had a big overall that you were going to love it. I loved it. I absolutely loved it. That Josh can both be like a feminist pro LGBTQ plus the biggest supporter of human rights. He can cry in a movie. He can cry to commercial. Not afraid to show every inch of his masculinity being vulnerable and everything. But then when somebody comes over and threatens him and his space with his wife and our trainer, who's a young girl in her early 20s, he throws the weight down and marches over to him. It was just fucking awesome. And it made me think Pete Hexeth would never if I can do that. He would have run down the stairs of the gym to the men's sauna and gotten some sort of BJ or something. Well, yeah. I got out his Bible and you know, read about all this stupid crazy shit. Pete Hexeth, I don't know if you've seen this. You know, he's my favorite target of ridicule. And that's I mean, that's I have a plethora and a cheese from. But did you see, you know, he's Mr. fat people can't be in the military. All-ah Donald Trump is the fatest one. He's the commander of cheap. He was trying to do pull ups the other day and somebody who's a viti newton. And I just I loved it so much that he was having such a horrible time because he's such a big tough guy. No, he wouldn't know or or what he would do if he let his wife defend him because he's such a pussy. All of those guys, Pete Hexeth, Lil Marco, JD Vance, Donald Trump, dumb, dumb junior, all of them. Every single one of them in that situation would have not responded to that guy would have not, you know, and they would have been like, Oh my God, they would have run immediately and told and they would not have like on what the fuck did you just say to me and like stood up, man, to man, they don't have that in them. But they also at the same time don't have the vulnerability to show emotion and disappointment and like a true raw vulnerability in front of other people, which to me is like a true form of masculinity. But I also read about the the cage fighting thing they had at the White House. I don't know if this is true or not, but I read it on the internet, specifically Elon Musk free speech website that they offered tickets to people in the military, but only of a certain ratio, height to waste ratio. They only offered it to skinny people. And then if you look at Trump, he swallowing like a up like a bubble tick. I've never seen somebody gain weight. It's such a record click. It seems like the more he goes to the hospital, the more he gains. And I don't know if they're doing like a reverse lipos or something. I don't know what's going on. Retaining fluid. I think it's hard. Just can't get through on it. It's just water, water, water, water, I mean his hands do think it's going to happen. I think his dad lived into his 90s. I mean, he was demented, still lived. I mean, I know. Was he fat as well? He was. It was he fat as well. Did you be saying any late stage photos? No, he was super thin. I will say this about him. He evil as fat, but he was really thin. Now I don't know if he took like eight like Donald Trump and all that, but he did live into his 90s. With him. It weren't the last 10 years, like full blown Alzheimer's. Yeah, but we've got full blown Alzheimer's right now. It's president of the 90s. I mean, we're on the countdown. Toshay, we did welcome. I've had it. I'm Jennifer. I'm Angie. For those of you that are new here, I've had it comes out every Tuesday and Thursday. It's a longer format. A little bit sillier, a little bit more lighthearted. If you want political news, we serve it up in bite-sized pieces every single day, seven days a week. And that podcast is called I Hip News. So make sure you're subscribed there. Kylie, what you got for us? I've got two reviews for you. This first one is five stars titled Amazing But Beware. I love this podcast. I love everything about this podcast. I love everyone involved with this podcast. What I don't love, however, is listening to an episode with my 73 year old mom who also loves this podcast and having to explain what pegging is. At least we had a good laugh about it. Keep up the good trouble, ladies. Oh my god, that reminds me, Paps. There is this false reporting, like a fake post of grimes. It's not real, but it's wildly entertaining. And it floats all over the internet. It's Grimes is one of the, she's the musician, baby mama of some of Elon Musk babies, right? Yeah. And it's a tweet that I believe has been proven to be false or some comment section, but she's basically like some of these Fortune 500 guys that own social media companies also like being pegged and also like recording it and also blah, blah, and I found it the other day. I was like, oh my god, Kylie and I read it to her because we're like, here it is. Grimes, sexuality and kinks are simply different for everyone. Many Fortune 500 CEOs enjoy being pegged. It shouldn't change your opinion of them. Some even record it. Even if those videos were to leak, being a successful auto maker or social media owner, being ruthlessly destroyed shouldn't be the end of his career. And that person definitely shouldn't be mad at his ex because it was her video that got uploaded. So much to my dismay, I don't think that is real. But for it, like four or five minutes, Paps, I thought it was real. And I felt like pre-Trump 2.0 joy. I really did. I felt like a joy that I haven't felt since like two years ago. Yeah, that's amazing. God, I would just, the dirty secrets coming out of there of all these creepy people surrounding Trump. I mean, I bet they are. I bet it would take, Kylie have to explain a lot of it to me. Now that that has been suggested and put out there, I don't know that I'll be satisfied with just prison for these people. I literally want videos that they thought were going to be their fun little things to have in their own private porn collection of them getting pegged publicly aired. Is that in my sociopath? No, no, I think that's very, I think that's very normal. You know what that review reminded me of Jenny? I don't. Working on it at the preschool, where the mom came up to you. I was like, I found these in my sense room. What are they? Oh my god, you guys. So, all right. So we sent our kids to this preschool in Oklahoma City and it's like two or three days a week. I remember it was a Jewish preschool because then in September, I was so excited to get this kids back to school and then they roll out like all these holidays. I'm like, I'm not prepared for this. I need for all these kids to be in school full time, nonetheless. I'm at Carpool and you had to like park your car and then go stand at the door and then they brought you your toddler. In this grand mother was picking up her granddaughter and she reaches into her purse. Jennifer, I wanted to show you something. I found these in my son's room. What do you think they are? And they were butt balls. Like anal beads? Yeah, anal balls. Butt balls. Yeah. I knew immediately that they were butt stuff. I mean, I knew immediately, but I'm standing here. She's like a grandmother and we're in front of the like synagogue, you know, and we're standing there. She's, oh Jennifer, I've been meaning to show you some of my families in my son's room. What do you think these are? And I was like, I think those are butt balls. Lynn, her name was Lynn. She's so sweet. She since passed away, but she was and here's the great thing about Lynn. She's like, she was like, oh, okay. Well, I guess I probably shouldn't have picked them up. And then she got her granddaughter and I got my son and we just went all out. Yeah, that was great. That was funny. Okay, last review. This one's five stars titled the right amount of outrage and stuff rights. This podcast platforms the correct amount of outrage on a daily basis while casting the correct amount of shade on the cruelty and hypocrisy of the GOP with the best humor to thank you for your service. That's nice. Really nice. The correct amount of outrage. So she starts with that doesn't think we're on the edge. So I like it. That's right. All right, before Pams and I started this podcast, this will come as a no surprise to any of you. We had no idea what we were doing. And thankfully, there are products online services online that are set up that already have all the infrastructure to help you get the ball rolling and one such service and the one that we signed up for is Shopify. 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OK, pop up the story first. A woman was arrested after mailing her ex's new girlfriend, a laminated 32 page binder titled, things he will eventually do to you. And so the police got involved after the new girlfriend reportedly received three updated editions in a single week. Authorities may have questioned the delivery method, but even critics admitted one thing. The research was disturbingly thorough. The dossier reportedly took three months to compile and included screenshots, timelines, relationship flow charts, color coded warning systems, and even witness statements from former roommates, co-workers, and a bartender who served the couple in 2018. Some of the sections were titled, excuses ranked by frequency, projected anniversary disappointments, known television remote violations, and historical snacked, and historical snack theft data. You know that that reminds me of. You do. I worship this woman. These are goals. Here's the thing. Like my question for you and for our listener and for our viewer is is she psycho? Or is she goals? I'm going goals. I'm thinking goals. I mean, that is dedication, follow through, like even with all the crazy shit I've seen excess due to each other in divorces, that tops the list of detailed effort. Here's the thing. I can't understand why she was arrested because mailing somebody something. I don't know. I mean, other than if like she got a restraining order. Probably it's probably a restraining order or something. Or you know, like she violated a restraining order because it looks like she sent the notebook once. And then I'm sure they probably filed a VPO. And then she sent three updates. So it has to be a VPO violation. Has to be. But to me, I'm a judge. I'm thinking, well, let's see it. What's in the book? Oh, for sure. If I was the judge, I would be like move everything off of the docket for the day. We are going to go through every page of the binder and everything reviewed. At our point, this court, and I would want the gal to give a presentation. Absolutely. I bet she gives a fantastic presentation. You know, my favorite section is, it just uses, he will make in order a frequency. Now that is fantastic. Yeah, love this woman. This is goals. I mean, can you argue it's unhinged probably? But it's totally unhinged. My only drawback from this would be like, she's still giving him so much power with the, no, but presentation. Yeah. Would you ever sit down and make this about your ex-husband? No. You have to care, right? No, I don't care. But I always, like the opposite of love is not hate. It's ambivalence. If you still have enough juice to make that kind of a binder, you're still in love with them. I mean, your feelings are still unresolved. But I dig it. I dig it. So let me ask you this. When your husband got back from sexual addiction rehab, listen, let me tell you something. I can't strip her camp. Stripper camp. So Angie's ex goes off to a sex rehab camp. And he would call her all the time and talk about how he was working on his trauma egg. His trauma egg, his trauma egg. And perhaps this is a back when we smoked cigarette. Should call me and she'd be like, he's working on that fucking trauma egg. I can't wait to get my hands on the trauma egg. I can't wait. So he gets home from rehab and she's like, I just need to give it a couple of days. But as soon as he's gone for a while, I'm going to call you. You need to come over on to me and we're going to find the trauma egg. Yeah. And so she calls me and she's like, you need to get your ass over here in like three or four minutes. And so I'm like racing up. She's like, bring two packs of cigarettes. So I guess she's, all right, let's burn first. We go on her back porch. We smoke when she says, all right, let's go. I think I know where it is. So we go in, right through his closet, we find the trauma egg. Yeah. We bring it out to the dining room table and meticulously fold it out. Do you remember this? You're such an old lady. Do you remember your dining room table had like those plastic covers for the top of the cover? So that was that so. Yes. OK, take it out. Take it from here, Poms. Once we found the trauma egg and spread it out. OK, just a reminder to new listeners, this is the same table where I had an off duty FBI agent come and get him a polygraph before he went to Shipper Camp. So this is the same dining room table. So it's like a construction paper, like I guess poster board thing. And it was like the biggest circle. And it would say that something. And it was color coded. So it was green. And then a strip of another thing. So it was like a layered crate. What would you call that poster board paper? Yeah. I'm kind of paper with markers and all this shit. And we were just like, fucking a-- like, I cannot believe we spent this much money. A bubble, bubble. So I don't know if he called while we had it out. But remember, he called and said, I don't want you a Jennifer through my stuff from rehab. My trauma egg. Stay away from my trauma egg. And I think we were already in it. We were not looking at it when he called. But we did find some tidbits. I remember we found some tidbits. And we were both like, what is that? What? And then, of course, then we petted all up. And then we go outside and chain smoke to analyze it all. And I guess so. We analyzed. We checked it out several days. I mean, it wasn't a one-end dinner. There's no way. We took it out multiple times. Multiple times. Which I think has phone call restricting access specifically while we were accessing it, probably exacerbated our desire to impulsively access it at will. Yeah. Then it became like, he doesn't want us to see the trauma egg. So every day, we just need to see the trauma egg. OK. All right. Moving along, here's another story. A group of baseball players on the San Francisco Giants are proving why we need pride month. Let's pop this up. After three San Francisco Giants pictures appeared in Friday's game with Bible verses written on their pride night caps, MLB issued a warning that similar behavior will not be tolerated. Here is San Francisco Giants picture, Landon Roup with his hat. Let's pop this up. There he is. So that's the gay pride hat. And he has to put on his hat right there with some sort of paint pen or marker. He puts Genesis 912 through 16. This is the passage from the Bible where God sets a rainbow in the sky as a covenant with Noah, promising never to flood the earth again. The message from the player is clear, the rainbow belongs to God, not the LGBTQ+ community. Let's just remember here, just for those of you that like to critically think, God's like, I've been a bad boy. I committed genocide. So I'm going to put a rainbow in the sky. And I mean, that's just-- that is insane, but I digress. 15% of San Francisco residents, 15% identify as LGBTQ+. The Giants were the first professional sports team to host a game that raised awareness and money for the HIV/AIDS epidemic with until there's a cure day in 1994. Roup was asked by a reporter why he made the decision. And here's what he said. Play the clip. Why was it important to know that? How did you know that? Kind of what the verse is. You know, the rainbow is a symbol of God's covenant to us and us as believers stand firm in that. But I don't-- I mean, it's not-- it's not anything-- you know, it's like--
There's no hate at all. It's just what I want to stand for and what I stand in. I believe in God. That's all right. All right. Form of long. Just imagine your faith being so fragile. That something that has nothing to do with you like celebrating pride. But everything to do with the city that employs you or the customers of the baseball team. You have to be a dick and put that on there. The Atlanta Braves also hosted their Pride night recently. And pitcher Spencer Strider showed how players can actually embrace the LGBTQ+ community. Let's play this clip. You know, we want everybody to feel included in a part of the community here in Atlanta and it's his part. It's the baseball team. You're part of that. You know, that's exciting and definitely wants to take those opportunities. So we really appreciate you being here and go braves. So to recap here, we have two teams, the Atlanta Braves first in their division with a hot pitcher who embraces the LGBTQ+ community and the San Francisco Giants far less hot of a pitcher or whatever player he is. Second to last in their league with players who turn their backs on their fans. And so here's a screen grab of the guy from Atlanta. Look at that form. Look at that. He looks like a great God. He's hot ass with that mustache. Look at this. Look at this mega pink arm. Trump, Trump, what is his name? Oh, and I think does he have a cross on his glove? The San Francisco like, like, if you're mad that people want to have pride meant then fucking get the the cross off your glove. These people, I hate them. I hate them. First of all, when he's like, you know, it's not a hate or anything. Well, then why can't you just let somebody have it? Why do you have to put Genesis on your hat? I mean, if you're all fine and you're so cool, shut the fuck up with your archery hat on. So that tells me he's mega right then and there. It's just like you have, you are a major league athlete. You are a professional athlete. No doubt you have access and money and you can't just enjoy it and be supportive and helpful, especially in San Francisco. You have to get your fucking magic marker out or paint pen and write some verse from Genesis on there. Shut the fuck up. That's what I say. I just think they're so fragile in their beliefs. They're so incredibly fragile in them that the idea of being inclusive, he's basically saying that's against my religion. Right. What an indictment. What an indictment on that sect of Christianity, that inclusivity is against your religion, not judging people is against your religion. And this is so ubiquitous in Bible belt states. What kids that were born to Maga Christian parents have to endure from their parents during Pride Month is enough. But then to have these pink arm, Trump chumps, pile on and belittle them more, it's just really more than I can take. And here's just something that these Maga people need to understand. All of them, all of the Maga people, whether you're in the administration or you live in rural America, gay people are here. They have always been here. They're not going anywhere. You can try to bully them. You can demean their parade. You can write stupid Bible verses about God trying to atone for committing a genocide with a rainbow and claiming that somehow that makes any fucking sense at all. But you just look like an asshole. And the gay people, they're still going to be gay, whether you make it legal, illegal, accept it, don't accept it. And there's homosexuality in animals, there's homosexuality in people. And I'm just going to say this to what's this guy's name? Landon, LA and Deanne, Landon, group. For me, Landon, when straight men are concerned so much about gay stuff, it raises red flags. But it's a red flag. I just, I sound this irons. I'm getting gay dar pinks. Woo, woo, woo, woo, woo. You're not worried about it. And you're thinking about it that much that you're going to get your paint pin out in 2026. You're thinking about it a lot, a lot, a lot. I agree. All right, let's head up a voicemail. I actually have a breaking news update on this story. What? JDance has chimed in this old coin on Twitter. Trump won. We don't have to do this anymore. Okay. Just a couple things about this. JDance, who, according to reviews that I have read of his new book about how he's such a great Catholic, that he is so arrogant and he's trying to tell the Catholic Church what they should believe in. This motherfucker is this, and he's trying to walk back childless cat ladies. This is a guy that called Trump America's Hitler and now sucks his dick at every cabinet meaning. And so, this is what he's doing. brand is loud music, right? This morning, while I was at work, a song was playing at work called "God and Guns," and I'm just gonna redo some lyrics that I heard. Oh, "God and Guns, ye keep us strong." That's what this country Lord was founded on. We might as well give up and run if we let him take our God and Guns. You know what? I wish you all would fucking run away because, "Now what the hell do you mean?" You will literally restrict anything but your guns. And somewhere else in the song, he talks about, you know, not being safe that you used to be able to have your door unlocked. Well, you know why you have to have your door locked? Because of your stupid fucking guns. Agree, one million percent. And I am in the land of God and Guns. Everybody God and Guns, family members, God and Guns. I just don't understand how people like, first of all, to make a hymn about like, ye guns, that's fucking crazy. But this God and Guns, like, where do they fit together? It's been, that to me is outside sources. Like, because I've been to Bible study, there's nothing about guns in the Bible. They didn't have them. So this marriage of God and Guns, to me is in R.A. going after the mega Christians. And here's one thing that I've had it with. Had it had it had it. I don't feel safe. What the fuck? Why do you know what they say? Why do you think you have like, for example, perfect example is like, my mother or she would be like, oh, there's so much crime. You've never been touched by crime ever in your whole entire life. You don't need a bunch of fucking guns. These crazy people about their guns. And what's this statistic? Like, all these, oh, I have a gun. My home is safe. The people that own the guns are the ones that are shot with their own gun. Like, it's a huge statistic. So I just think these are the dumbest people among us that are so insecure that they think again as the only thing that can protect them. Like, shut the fuck up. - Well, and there's psychology behind this. They've studied liberal brains and conservative brains and conservative brains. People are more fear-based. And so that's why like your mother falls prey to Fox News propaganda about the immigrant care of ants and all of the crime and blue cities. And I always know when I was in Oklahoma City and I said, I'm moving to New York. I could always tell when somebody watched Fox News that go, aren't you worried about the crime? Or if you tell them you're going to Mexico, oh my God, are you gonna be safe? I'm like, pitch please. We're the ones with all the fucking guns, getting charged with movie theaters and schools and all this shit, Mexico is just fine. So they operate from a position of being scaredy cats, conservatives, or all these conservative men are terrified. Fear is their driving force of all of the decisions that make psychologists a provenness. They can't critically think and instead, they replace critical thinking with just blind obedience. And so they're just, you know, obedient for the sake of just being obedient. But as it pertains to guns, it surprises me zero. Everybody knows I was raised by atheist parents, but I would be people in Oklahoma or nuts about recruiting you if you say you don't go to church. They're all up in your business. So I go to church with some friends time to time. And the meanest, cruelest shit I'd ever heard in my life was from a pulpit. It was just these pastors, Baptist church, Southern Baptist, Pentecostal, it was just this hellfire damnation. So you have this group of Americans, these right wing evangelicals that number one don't critically think. Number two, do whatever their parents have told them or whatever their churches have told them. And it sets the psychological soil for them to fall prey to all sorts of manipulation from the NRA, from Russia, from Fox News, because they are so fucking scared all the time. They fall prey to scapegoating so easily. And when you take away somebody's will to critically think, which is what these churches do, then you've got it. And this was a whole Reagan thing too. The war on crime and all of this started in the '80s. Remember the neighborhood watch stuff? They start the NRA was behind all of that to get guns because the guns were for profit. And the most easiest manipulated people in this country are the same people that triple trumped. They're the same people that go to mega churches. They're the same people who bully their gay kids. They're the same people who believe the bullshit that trickle down economics is great. They're the same people that think Lindsey Graham is a heterosexual. These are the people that fuck us, fuck us, fuck us, those people. Yeah, always. Speaking of which, did you see the picture of Lindsey Graham at Trump's fight night with the two guys? I mean, I've never seen him happier. Of course. All right, let's go to the next voice memo. OK, at next, we've got Ellie. Hi, Jen Pomsen-Kiley. I am reporting from Arizona. And I do have a grievance for you. But first, I wanted to thank you so much for everything that you are doing. I am the daughter of an extreme jumper. And it is only getting worse. And he is doubling down throughout the past couple of weeks. So we are, that's kind of five. And I really, really appreciate you guys. My grievance is that I have fucking had it with anyone that holds the door for you while you are visually a miles away. And it only happens to be the creepiest of creepy men that will stand there and hold it for me and make eye contact with me while I am a mile or two away. It's just, it's horrible. I practice what I'm going to say to them. I practice them saying really creepy things and me just laughing it off and walking inside. Then they're walking behind me to the elevator. It is a whole process. Walk through the fucking door. Just I don't get the fuck about your ego. Go. I will open my own fucking door. Thank you. So the complaint is there should be an expiration time based on distance that you go ahead and go in. She saying creepy old men see her, clearly cute. You could tell by the voice, cute as a button. Walk and happen they, they belabor the, the door hold to get close to the gal. Is this how, but this happens to you all the time, Poms. It's the hot as you are. I'm gonna fuck, what happened was at the gym last week, I park and then it's a long walk up to the door and this guy was coming out. He saw me and it wasn't, I mean, it was like an uncomfortable amount of time where I was like, do I hurry? Do I just keep walking? Do I wave it off? And I have the exact same thought like, why are you holding the door? Just let the door, I can open my own door. But then I felt like I needed to kind of hurry up. So I just maintained the same thing and he stood there and held it the whole time. So obviously, unbeknownst to me, he thought I was hot. And so clearly, let's go over the demographics. It's like I how tall, high color. All right, 70, 80, what we're talking here. 60. Definitely into 70s. Like he was an older, like my parents age guy. Tall short. Light. Probably not too tall. But if you could have been taller, you should get a fair amount of heat. Do you get a fair amount of heat? No, I was like, this is so annoying. Don't do that. But you know what I've been doing? I don't know what it is. I've been opening doors like for men. Like I run up it. I don't like do a lot of less. I was running today and I did it. I was just like, we both were doing it the door at the same time and so I opened it and pulled it back. And I don't know if that's, I was just like, I don't, I don't know. I don't know why I did it. Kylie, what's the list? On how gay she is? Yeah, let's review. Is that gay? Sometimes I just said, you said I've just started opening the door for men and I said a lot of lesbians do this. Oh, I didn't hear that. I thought you said does she have a list? Remember that? Yeah. Remember that Larry David episode of Curb Your Enthusiasm where he's holding the door and he sees that she's a lesbian kind of masculine presenting lesbian. So he goes, eh, and he closes it and goes in. And then she finds him and heads him down and confronts him. Like, hey, why didn't you hold the door for me? And he's like, well, you're clearly a lesbian. She was like, so is someone with the door held for me. I like to hold the door for men as like a little bit of like a power move sometimes. So what it was, the power move, it is for me. So the other day I was I was going into the gym and I was totally like texting somebody. It was like an important work text I needed to get out. And I was in somebody had the door open. Is a gay guy, of course. And so I go in after and he kept hitting the door and then I never said, thank you. And he goes, thank you. And I went, thank you for scolding me for that. I was a total asshole in all sincerity. Thank you. Thank you for scolding me. Thank you for holding the door. I loved it. Yeah. I loved it. If I'm a dick, I want somebody to say, hey, and I'm, oh my gosh. Sometimes you get caught in your own world. All right. So that was today's podcast. I have a book that's coming out that you all have got to preorder. It is called Not Today Fascist, which today we will dedicate the Not Today Fascist to let me find that little pink arm, homophob, what's his name here? Landon. Believe his name was Landon with the land in Rob. Landon Rube. I would like to dedicate to Landon Rube. He is San Francisco Giants pitcher, a homophob, a illiterate, non-critically thinking fascist. Not a real advanced fascist. But. a fascist nonetheless. So to support me, pre-order the book, it's linked right below in the show notes. And I want to remind everybody that this is our long format I've had it podcast. If you want bite-sized pieces of the news, go to iHipNews and subscribe to that one as well on our YouTube, it all comes up the same channel. But if you want to know what's going on with the mega fuckery, go there and we will see you all later.
Podcast Summary
Key Points:
The hosts complain about parents letting young children order for themselves in restaurants, causing delays.
They recall their own past disruptive behavior with kids in public, including a child vomiting in a restaurant.
A story is shared about Josh confronting an unhinged man at the gym, which the host praises as a balance of masculinity and vulnerability.
They criticize political figures like Pete Hegseth and Donald Trump for lacking genuine toughness or empathy.
A review mentions having to explain “pegging” to a 73-year-old mom, leading to a discussion about leaked private videos.
A humorous anecdote involves a grandmother finding anal beads in her son’s room and asking what they are.
A news story is highlighted about a woman mailing a detailed binder to her ex’s new girlfriend, which the hosts debate as either psychotic or aspirational.
The episode includes ad reads for Shopify and Chewy.
Summary:
In this episode of *America’s Top DEI Podcast*, hosts Jennifer and Angie (Pumps) share grievances and stories. Pumps complains about parents letting young children order for themselves in restaurants, causing long waits. They both reflect on their own past disruptive behavior with kids, including a memorable incident where Pumps’ daughter vomited into a bowl of chips at a Mexican restaurant.
Jennifer then recounts a gym confrontation where her husband Josh stood up to an aggressive man, praising his blend of toughness and vulnerability—contrasting it with political figures like Pete Hegseth and Donald Trump, whom they criticize as fake and weak. The hosts read listener reviews, one of which leads to a discussion about explaining “pegging” to an older relative, and they share a humorous story about a grandmother finding anal beads in her son’s room. A news story about a woman mailing a 32-page binder to her ex’s new girlfriend sparks debate on whether the act is psychotic or aspirational.
The episode also features ad reads for Shopify and Chewy, promoting their services. Overall, the show blends personal anecdotes, political commentary, and humor, maintaining a lighthearted tone while targeting hypocrisy in the GOP and celebrating moments of authenticity.
FAQs
Pumps is frustrated when parents let their young children order for themselves at restaurants, making the line take longer.
They recall bringing their snot-nosed, vomiting children to restaurants, disrupting other customers, and once a child vomited into a bowl of chips.
A man threatened Josh and his trainer; Josh confronted him, and it was later discovered the man had harassed another woman the day before.
They say Josh shows both vulnerability and strength by standing up to a threat, while they mock Hegseth as weak and hypocritical.
The grandmother found anal beads in her son’s room and asked Jennifer what they were; Jennifer told her they were 'butt balls.'
The fake quote suggests many Fortune 500 CEOs enjoy being pegged and recording it, and shouldn't be shamed if videos leak.
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