Parker McCollum Goes To Switzerland | You Be Trippin' with Ari Shaffir

I guess. You know who's cool. It's right. We're all thinking the same guy. Arnold Schwarzenegger. And you know why is school? Some of you might have the wrong answer here. No, it's not because he had sex with his maid and had a child with her and raised him as if he was this full-blooded marriage child. No, it's not that at all. Even though you could tell who it was. It's because while he was dealing with all these smoking cigars, Arnold Schwarzenegger smokes cigars. He's one that covers cigar-efficient auto. But how do you get him? You're new to it. If you're a guy, you know it's cool. And if you're a girl, oh, if you're a girl, you smoke a cigar. Woo, that's hot. Probably what that maid did. To turn them on. Well, that's where cigars international comes into play. They have with the largest selection of unbeatable prices and customer service, experience of second and none. Whether you're new to cigars or seasoned, efficient auto. cigars international takes and joins cigars makes them easy, approachable and fun. And now they're offering free everyday shipping on cigars international. No, no, no, no. cigars international is a go-to really for all retailer for all things cigars. Biggest selection. I love them. Gone, go. He was out of them. Use my code trippin at checkout for 20% off your order of $50 or more. Or visit cigarsinternational.com, www.cigarsinternational.com/trippin. And the discount will automatically apply. Guys, some exclusions apply. But it's a solid, it's a solid gift and a solid pickup. Let's get back to the episode. Howdy y'all. And welcome to a brand new episode of UB Trippin. Today on the podcast, we've got country music sensation, Parker McCollum, coming on and tell us about Switzerland, his trip there with his buddies. Buies, please subscribe. Wherever you're watching, listen. We also got the UB Trippin Patreon going where every single episode of R.E. Shaffir's Skeffitink is going up little by little. They're all up there. Each week for you guys to listen to old classics. I've been listening to some of them and they're actually quite hilarious. Listen to going blind with Tom Segura, happy dying just out of the opening gate. Please subscribe also. If you're listening on Spotify, if you're watching on YouTube, hit the subscribe button. Leave a like, leave a comment for the algorithm. And that's it. Guys, let's start a new episode. And next week, the next two weeks, you guys subscribe. Next two weeks, Ari Maddie and one of the greatest trips you'll ever hear about me and Ryan O'Neal going to Peru. You guys, you want to subscribe. Let's start this week, though. Yeah, right. We're just like, let's do the documentary and go across America and just interview. Have you ever seen hands on a hard body? Uh-huh. It's a change of fucking life. Have you ever take the time to watch it? We don't need to go there. We need to. You should watch it sometime, dude. Dude, it's some famous director said that's the greatest documentary of all time ever made. But it's this town in deep, deep east Texas where that's like very small town. I think there's a long view Texas in the car. It's like in the 90s, the car dealership. Local car dealership did a deal where if whoever keeps their hand on this car the longest gets you to have the car. Yeah. And it's like it's going to go then in like national archives one day. But like we could do that same thing. But for for mockups or just parking lot security and call it. You can't park there. Dude, if there was like 30 people and eventually I'm getting tired, I'm like, all right, I'm done. If you get down to one-on-one, what would make you not? What would make you take your hand out that car? Nothing. Uh-huh. Godly, I don't know. If you watched it, you would you wouldn't ask the question. Okay. What is it hand on a hard body? Hands on a hard body. I'll watch it. It is so worth your time. It's one of the funniest shit. It's the funniest thing you'll ever see in your whole life. All right. Hell yeah. Oh, and it probably had a $75 budget to make it. It's truly worth it. Let's do it. Let's make it documentary. Yeah, yeah. If it only takes $75, you have something like that for parking lot security. Yeah. I'm in for $37.50. I'll split it with a $50.50, dude. Right, right, little. Harkamark Hall. Thanks for coming in. Hered your last album. I just got into country not too long ago. Do you think it's a country record? What is it, Americana? I don't know. Guys, here you'll be chipped and we're trying to bridge the gap between Americana and country because to everyone else, it's one fucking genre. Yeah, I just, I don't, I don't know, dude. I've never really. What do you think it is, rap? Sure, yeah. You could probably get away with that today. Call me a rap? Yeah. You could find somebody in today's world that would be like, "He's right." We do not think that's country. I don't know. What is country nowadays, you know? It's such this broad thing and I'm like, when I, the country music I grew up on, when I'm like, when I was a kid wanting to be a country singer, like, it doesn't sound like that music. Oh, right. You know? It sure doesn't. There's moments of it that I think, dude. Parts of it, there's times where you're like, "Ooh, yeah, you could draw that comparison." And I'm like, I don't know what it is. I've never known what to call because I don't sound, I've never thought I sounded like any of the guys that I, or Gals that I grew up like listening to and idolizing. We didn't know I didn't mean to dive down deep into that. No, it's okay. Well, it's a big thing. What is the country with you grew up in like brown brown? 100% yeah. George straight and, you know, Ronnie Millsap and Randy Travis and I mean, dude, it's a long time. Yeah, a lot, dude. Bus, didn't know. That's country, for sure. Walking around in a days. Yeah, I mean, that is as country as I love it, the shit of that song. There's actually a great blues cover of that song. I forget who does it. That's worth checking out if you like Johnny Paycheck, but yeah, that's fucking I love a guy like that. You're like, you're either going to, you're going to beat up your wife or go to jail for something unrelated like that. Yeah, and in a knife fight. And my older brother is such a great songwriter and he was the one that these are the reason I knew about all these guys such a young age, but like, he was always so adamant, you know, you got to live the songs you write, right? You got to live the songs you write. And I was always out for for 10 years after I graduated high school. I was like, so I got to live the songs I'm writing, but I wasn't beating any women or going to jail. Dude, you got to try it. Yeah, I've heard, I've heard I've read it. I've read it. I've heard on read it. It's great. But I mean, first of all, I'm like, I never left it like lefty usually for no reason. There's another great point as to why it may not be a country record too. Yeah. Anyway, I really enjoyed it regardless. Thanks. I appreciate it. Yeah. How did you even find that record? But I don't know if you know about this, but there's a site called Spotify. And 80s. I've heard how much their record collection. That was the answer you could have just said Spotify. Yeah, but I want to do a country. A country version is like a yeah, you had one line of that that got me to what did I tell myself not to drink, but I was doing drugs. Yeah, that's not on that record, but I appreciate that. Bullshit. Bullshit. If I Bullshit, let's bet a billion. Let's bet a billion. Let's do. Let's bet a billion. If I win this bet, you have to fund the entire budget for the documentary. Okay. No, no, no, you're fucked. That's no way. I heard it. Yeah. I wish the guy that wrote and sang the song was here. He could tell us. Okay, hold on. That'd be brilliant. No. I ain't seen an old school globe like that in a minute. My blue is it on that? No, it's on a song called Handle on You. And it says, I tell myself that I should quit, but I don't listen to drugs. Well, then what the fuck did I say? Yeah. Didn't you say that? Isn't that the line that you said? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. The different song, different record. But what do you mean? Now I have discovered that. Was it you? Yeah, that's me. Wait, so what do you mean? Different record than this new one? Yeah. Well, yeah, I heard that one. Yeah. Oh, that's why you're asking me. Where'd you hear the album? No, the one that's not out yet. This will come out when this comes out. I don't have access to that. No, you're. Dude, I'm on an issue. You're we're on different pages. Yeah, we're reading different books right now. I really liked. Thanks. Yeah, the new one. I really liked it too. That was my favorite record I've ever made by a hundred miles. Really? Why? I don't know. Dude, it was like the hardest I'd ever gone. Yeah. It was the, I was just like, you know, desperate to be like, I want to be, I want to impress myself again. And I did. And it was cool. It was one album of the year that ACM just a few months ago for that record and like never had a single conversation or a single thought during any point in the process of that record was anybody we're in New York City when we made it. And I never even album of the year and no award of any kind ever even crossed my mind when making that thing. So when we like, you know, several was that a year later? Almost a year later, it wins album of the year. That was cool, you know? That is cool. Yeah, good recognition stuff. Anyway, let's talk about going somewhere. I've been places. Yeah. I am going to, I hope that you'll send me that or the guys will send all your Jews will send me that album. So when this does come out all of a sudden, I can put it to the thing. You got to get some Jews. But I had orange juice this morning. No. And first of all, and I want some. I'm talking about. And, but I'm, I'm a little tired orange juice. I'm going to sample juice or something. I've always thought to be great how we can cost him. But orange juice. Yeah, just good. Like, you guys were young. We're like a huge orange outfit. That's not bad. Yeah. I'm orange juice. Yeah. You need two people. Yeah. Yeah. Well, you do. You do. You do Apple or. Yeah. Great. Oh, just juice. Whatever have you. - Yeah, yeah, um. - Bro, yes. - But, yeah, and that really, yeah. - Hey, everybody out there, I give you permission to go ahead and do that. - Yeah. - Parking orange, that's fine. - And dude, what's, I don't know anything about, you know, people always make like Jewish jokes. - Yeah. - You're like, you just said the Jews. - Yeah. - I'm like, I really don't know. - 'Cause you grew up in Nashville. They grew up here. - I grew up in Texas. - I don't really know why they're funny. I don't know why they wouldn't be funny or why they would be funny. Like, I have zero, and it's kinda like, you could pick, like, I don't know, look on this map, and I don't know if this is even a real place. Spain, yeah. I know nothing about that, you know? - Yeah, that's not as funny. - I don't know anything. When people are like talking about like Jews and money, or like Jews have all the money, or-- - Yeah. - We have a lot of it, we have a lot of it. - Yeah, yeah, I'm like, I don't know why. I've never looked into it. And I'm an incredibly like curious person, like I'm constantly reading, I read all the time, about just, I go down every day of my life, I'm reading about something just so random. And-- - But you're the only person in Tennessee or Texas that has not looked up, why do the Jews have all the money? - Yeah. - Yeah. - Yeah. - You know? If I, maybe I should. - Yeah. Here's why we're funny, 'cause we try to get out of fights, 'cause we're not strong. And it's, except for one major time, it's worked. - Yeah. - Except for one major time when our mouth could not get us out of the trouble. - It was a big time. - Yeah. What a loss. - Well, you know what I mean? - Johnny and L. I mean, you're talking about 72 to 7 and a half. - Maybe, maybe I should go on a trip. - Yeah. - Maybe I should go on a trip and find some more out about the Jewish community. - Yeah, go back in time to any 31. You'll find out. - I don't wanna go to that one. - All right, I don't wanna go to that one. - I have Vinda Switch. I went snowboarding in Switzerland. - You always a border? - For the most part. - Okay. - Okay, nice. - I can make it look in a photograph, like I'm a lot better than I am. But I enjoy it a lot. - Yeah. - Yeah, we went, we were actually going to Japan. We've been staying for years and we're going to go snowboarding in Japan. - Yeah, that's right. - And the powder is like, the powder. - Apparently it's, yeah. Apparently there's some special about it or something, some humidity in the air that makes it like a different texture, I don't know. - Okay. - And so we were originally going to Japan. And this was like 2021, 2022, something. And like I think the COVID restrictions were actually still pretty strict getting over there and getting out. So like a couple, like a few weeks before that trip we pivoted to Zermont, Switzerland. - I've been there. - Yeah, you liked it. - Dude. Oh, this is great. - Like the Madahorn and all that? - Yeah, I thought it was a fake place. - Yeah, it's not. - I thought it was just Disney, so I'm skiing past it. - I remember when I was on, when we were there too, my mom was like, on the phone she'd low-switching. And she's like, I went to Switzerland and I climbed the Madahorn. And I'm like looking at this thing and I'm like, - Yeah, what? - I don't think you climbed. She's like, no, we climbed all the way to the top. - We climbed all the way to the top. - There's no way. - And I'm looking at it and like, no fucking way. - Mom, I think you're thinking of a different mountain. Yeah, I don't think, I don't think I could climb that. There's only like 30 people I think that have and people have like died climbing it. - No, no, the fuck you got a climb. I never found out what she actually climbed. - Not bad. - Yeah, yeah, that's the Madahorn right there. Yeah, it's, it's, yeah, fuck off lady. - Yeah, I don't think. - I'm not saying I underestimate my mom's climbing abilities. - Just pre-solo. - You don't even know about it? - Just, yeah, seven surprising facts about the Madahorn. - If number six is that your mom actually did climb it? - Yeah, what if it was? - That was a surprise, it's all in there. - That's very surprising. - Yeah, there's just no way my mom actually climbed it. - There's no way, mom. - One of the two women do ever do it. - Yeah, but you ski part, oh that's cool. So you went there, yeah, that got me back into skiing. - Really? - I stopped like 15 years then I was going to visit my brother in Zurich and then he's like, let's go and we'll go there. - You skied like Brack and stuff like that right in Colorado? - Yeah, Vail usually. And then just-- - It's better. - Well, like you told us the best. - The skiing in America, I thought, like the overall, like the actual runs, like I enjoyed Colorado and stuff. - I thought that the runs and the character of like the mountain was cooler in America than it was Switzerland. - Okay. - But it was just breathtakingly gorgeous over there, dude. Like it was Christmas every now, we'd walk to dinner and be like snowing outside and you're like, we had this house, like I want to deal with you walking down to the town, you know, you can see the town from the balcony. And it was just, it's a freaking post, Hallmark postcard place, you know. And I think it literally is on Hallmark postcard. - That makes sense. Have you ever done anything like that before? Been out to a place like that? - No, I don't really leave the continental U.S. much. They got just about everything I need here. - Yeah, I mean, yeah. - I like Hawaii, I've been to Alaska and, you know, Mexico's great, Bahamas, Shore, went to St. Lucia one time, but yet continental, kind of a U.S. restaurant, right now. - Yeah, but now you're in this other place, you're in Switzerland, it's gotta be fresh. Do people speak English there enough or no? - Some people did, I don't really know what they were speaking. And it's cool over there too, 'cause we didn't get to do it, 'cause it actually was closed on the day, you kind of have to plan for you, you gotta take your passport with you up the mountain, you can like ski into France and some other place. Yeah. And the day we tried to do it, it was like, it was closed for some reason. So like we had our passports went all the way up there and couldn't do it, but I mean, I don't know if it would have mattered would you have been like, "Hey, we're in France." That would have been it, you know? Wait, that's crazy. Why do you prefer that, like, like Breck over? - The runs felt like in Switzerland, it was just like, you're just ripping straight downhill the whole time. Like if you wanna hit like some cool trees, like there was no terrain part. - Interesting. - You know, or like the character of like the mountains and Breck and Montana and Utah and stuff, like, you know, there's so much to do on your way down. - Yeah, if you go through the woods. - And in Switzerland, it felt more just like, go up, come down, go up, come down, go up, come down. And it's freaking breathtakingly gorgeous. So like, you know, it's not like I didn't enjoy it. I just, like when I left, I was like, man, I think that like if you had those runs over there, it'd be-- - There's long runs too. - Yeah. - It'd be like so long. You get a gondola, a gondola, a gondola. - And like the, there was like this little chalet. - Yeah. - I think is what it's called thing on like the little route home. You know, you would ski all the way to the bottom, like the skinny route along this so sketchy the whole way. And there's a ton of people want to be like, pull this little chalet, it's got like four or five tables. And we would get like, it was like a champagne bar, I think. And we would like drink champagne. - I'll price you. - Yeah, well, you'd have like three, you'd probably have like three to five minutes once you left the chalet before you were down. So like, you'd take a long way home, like right before the end of it. You would like pull off and you got the view of the Madahorn and deals and-- - Oh, that's tits. - Yeah, it was baller. How much was the food in those places? - I don't remember. - Comparatively, when you went four years ago, so you already kind of had money. - Yeah, three or four years ago, it was quite most of my meals at like a truck stop, a trailer, like a food truck. There's a bar house, yeah. I felt like one thing that I thought was like really good. - What? - And I just accidentally remember what it was. But I ate it like every day for lunch and dinner. It was cool. - We'd hired a person to come cook breakfast for us every morning, which is cool. - Did you get the Swiss food? - It was like Swiss, yeah, of course I was trying things and like a lot of fondue and like all these different dishes and you know, a couple of them I was like, "Hey, yeah, that's pretty good." The other stuff I was like, "That's pretty odd." - Yeah. - But it was fine. I mean, it was such a ass whoopin' the jet lag. 'Cause we flew to Germany and then we flew to Geneva and we had like two nights in Geneva to like try to like, I guess, acclimate or whatever, try to get on some sort of sleep schedule. And that was brutal. Like in everything closes in Geneva, like 1 p.m. for some reason, very early. - That's an unit for all. - For like the night and so like, you know, you would finally fall asleep and then when you would wake up and you'd be like, "I don't, you're just starving." I ended up finding a subway. It was the only thing open. A chicken nuggets at the subway. This is true, Shory. And I was by myself and just, you know, you're just like a zombie for like two days 'cause you just can't. - Chicken nuggets at a subway. That's not even what you read at a subway here. - I know, could you believe they had that? - It's not even sandwich. - Yeah, it was odd. And the chips were different, the soda was different. It was different, dude. It was cool to go experience new stuff like that. - Yeah, what do you mean different? Just different brands? - Yeah, I mean, to me, it's not as good. You know, if those people came over here, maybe they would think ours isn't as good, but 'cause it's not what they're used to. But it just, yeah, and then I remember when we flew back, we played the governor's ball here in Texas at like seven PM that night, so we went on stage. - I went to a, like six AM, Swiss time. And I was, I was like, I'm on stage and I'm like, I'm never leaving the country again. Like this is the toughest thing I've ever done. - That could be for doing it though. - But the, it makes phenomenal, dude. I'd never, I'd never, that's as far away from home as I've ever been. And I've been traveling nonstop for 12 years, but I used to. - Yeah, but it's so interesting though, it's road travels, like, So going on the road is different than actually going to a place and like seeing it and like yeah, and you're like you're a tourist. Yeah, how did it feel? It was all right. Yeah. Yeah, it was all right. You know, I feel like had I seen it on YouTube That would have been enough. Yeah, it may have been a lot. It was baller, dude. It was so sick to and we and I went with Here'd you go with two guys in my band and then my photographer went with as much hard for Chris wasn't going It was the night before we were leaving. He was at my house and I was like, hey, you're going to switch on tomorrow And he's like, I don't have any clothes and I was like, we're gonna go buy you clothes Hey guys, I'm gonna break into today's episode of let you know a little bit about the guest park. I'm a column He's doing a he has a new album coming out. They told me to be out this week But I don't know if it is I can't find any information on the web. It's an acoustic album. I think it might be January 2027 to be honest, but it might be out But he is touring the UK right now. He's at Manchester London all in October than Birmingham, Glasgow Belfast Dublin the Honda oh and then back in America on his own the Honda rodeo fest floors country store and hellaotes, Texas, Houston Corpus Christi, Round Rock, Denver, Fort Worth, then Melbourne, Sydney, Willow Bank. Whoo. And back to Texas Georgetown Port Charlotte caught it was constant Columbus, Ohio get tickets at parkhamacolumn.com/tour Guys, that's it. Please subscribe wherever you're watching listening Yeah, we got some great ones for you. The next I'm gonna tell you what we're doing Today is scary and last week was scary because of Halloween. It's frightening. I'll tell you the theme Later why it's so frightening november is gonna be all travel vloggers month. We got seal on tour sabbatical rolf pots Charles world traveler micok It's gonna be a great month So subscribe and then the rest of this month we got Ryan O'Neill doing a trip me and myself and him Went to Machu Picchu and then we had some really horrific Yeah, that'll fit into the scary Yeah, it was a really horrific time We had some we had some trouble It's an episode you want to listen to And Ari Maddie on an episode It was right that we lost completely. I don't know which one's gonna be next week. Ari or O'Neill on that flip for the next one But please subscribe leave a comment check right now if you're subscribed if you're not hit it and that's it guys Let's get back to the episode Switzerland with parkamacala. Oh my yaw yaw So we went and bought him clothes Key clothes and he doesn't ski he just hung out at the house all day every day, but it was so funny because My base player Jason I told him he's a big skier and I told him. I was like hey look. I'll pay for the trip You book it like playing everything do all the stuff. So we do that he does all this stuff books this trip He's got all the travel and the you know with the little golf cart ride up the mountain from How does this it was a crazy journey just to get to zermont and so he does wait what it's a train. It's a golf cart It's like a golf car. It's like a What is it? I don't even really know What do you mean from where to where to get up to where We left zermont or we left Frank Geneva. Yeah, and had like a car service drive us a couple of hours To like the base of this mountain and zermont maybe somewhere like that and then we got out at like this little checkpoint and we got in We got in a golf cart thing. It was like a not a golf cart. It was like a road It's like a legal Legalized golf cart thing Box it's very small like the how we got all of it I'd taken my snowboard over there which actually had gotten Lost all the way over there, which was great and luggage deal um But like how we got all of our luggage and and four grown men in this golf cart with the guy driving it and went up to some I remember just being like word Time. Yeah, we're yeah, we're gonna be murdered or or we're never gonna make it. This is our this final destination And what do you think you're like a lodge? We had like a house. It was a nice house like a two store house And I remember like NFL playoffs we're going on so we're watching like the first night. We got two zermont You know, we're watching NFL playoff game at like I don't know. It's like midnight one a.m. Well, I go to sleep and like him and wake up And we get we're getting up every morning like it's sunrise and it's go skiing and skiing and snowboarding. Yeah, and I go to I walk upstairs and go to my room and like 12 when I wake up My phone's dead and I'm like, damn it's got to be time to go skiing So I like go downstairs and Chris my photographer is still watching the game and I'm like man What time is it like is it time to go skiing? He's like You went upstairs 20 minutes ago Like it was only the second quarter of the game. It's passed out. Yeah, and I that was just so disoriented from the jet lag and the the whole deal that Yeah, jet lag is real. It's very real, but but anyways back to what I was saying Chris the night before we go buying clothes And he has and I'm like hey like he's he's not having to get like a credit card in order to get a ticket because they don't have one or whatever to You know switch on he just buys like a typical seat in the back. It's a miserable flight the whole way there in a regular seat And I've got the lay down thing in the front and we're like waiting and lying And remember Jason had planned everything he'd done all the work planned everything and They call Chris's name over the speaker and they're like we please come to the front and they give him First class lay down all the way over there nice Well, then we get on the plane and my assistant Lane is with us and he's in a regular seat with Jason and they they walk up and they're like Lane piece you've been upgraded the first class lay down the whole way in Jason who planned the entire thing had to sit I should go there now where man, they made the decision. It's not that I could do and we're all up there just you know Bullshit around we're like popping up going from one person's little pod to another like do it We're having just the time our lives is back. They just eat and shit. You go back and like resume now. I felt we felt they even want to see it He was so mad at everybody and just so So put out that you wouldn't have you have none of you got bumped. They randomly all got upgraded so great first class except for him Dude when you get that call when you're like you've changed your seat like why and they're like it's much better. You're like nice. Let me see if I can Oh great the message never since I don't have any of the photos but um yeah the uh I don't know if I would ever go back. Yeah But I am glad that I went How was the skit? Why wouldn't you go back? It's just such an ass whooping to get there and get back You're gonna tour them you're gonna tour over there, but that won't be some ski season. I think we will at some point Yeah, but even like you know when you go we need to do that you know you're gone for a while we went you know we We busted ass got over there. I think we skied for six days and then busted back so you're my secret it's a long like tours. What's that different now because you got You got offspring Yeah Do the tour and then stay on the end of it for five days six days just for fun Yeah, that would be fun. You know make it like but I don't think I would ever do that I'm always so ready to go home. It's such a home. I'm gonna go home. I've been going for 12 years Yeah Yeah, just non-stop gone all the time Where's on you mode 99% of my day has been thinking about How am I gonna get home quicker I'm gonna get back to my house sooner. You're bad. It's gonna start hating you when you're like let's get that six day I'm playing like bro Man, I've done a thousand of them, you know Denver airport at five forty five in land as an airport at five forty five LAX JFK you're not Denver airport with no sleep and you start like really thinking like yeah, baby There's storage facilities here for bodies. I see it now. You didn't just those like it's it's like The lines yeah, you come down at escalator at the Denver airport and you see all those people and you're like You know like you you would do some unforgivable things just have to skip it just get to skip it you ever get into a line with like And then like a fan is like right behind you oh, yeah And then I'll say something like hey, how you do and then you just want to like Like like we should we should stay up all night. Yeah, you know doing lots of stuff and then we'd go to an early flight And you just a lot of stuff. Yeah, and you just be in the airport on people like are you and you're like not right now I'm sure not I'm nobody right long guy. I'm dead. Yeah Um like you got the sniffles and like yeah, I got the sniffles. Do you have Do you have a favorite place that you've been I've been to a lot of places, but like um Myanmar I loved and East Timor and then like Peru. I don't know. What was Peru like have I been to Peru? No way Happy now. I went to Puerto Rico Yeah, that's close to each other. I don't think so Let's say Yeah, you see that right there. That's you That's a lot of people though, especially texted Nashville. It's like I'm good. Yeah, and and there's somebody from All that feels the same way you can find Right there somebody right here looks to say you could probably find right here. Yeah I dare about in India and then I go Somebody there is like hey, you should go to America and then somebody there is just like you they go I could shit in the streets here anywhere I want while I go to a place where I don't know what streets I can shit on You can shit in the streets here. They let you do that now. Oh right out there in the mothership. Yeah, for sure Yeah, yeah for sure. I've never been dude. I want to go there too. Really? Yeah. Oh wait I wish I'd been there and had that to talk about. - The mothership? - Yeah, boys and girls. - I getcha in there. - Yeah, how long you got here? - And that where they do kill Tony. Yeah, I see that only right all the time. It's good stuff. - Tony rules. - Yeah. - It's that shows in the same day. - I pretty much just have my dick out on that show. - Yeah, well, it's a good thing to have out. - Yeah, it's like, let Ray Ben Blurring. - Do you want to have it in? - When you went on this Switzerland trip, were you stingled in or? - That was married. - Ah, damn, I was going to ask if you-- - No. - Okay. - What the, probably a good place to do that. - Yeah, plus you could pass a Swiss. - You think so? - Tall, yeah, you could pass a German Swiss German. - Don't they make Rolex over there in Switzerland? - If you say so. - Yeah, I think I remember walking around a real nice Rolex store in Zermott. They had cool stores. - Yeah. - McDonald's is really weird over there. I don't remember, but I remember standing at the kiosk and almost like the chicken nuggets at Subway. There were just some options where you're like, this is so bizarre. - How bizarre? - Like they don't have that here in like where my McDonald's, in Thailand, they have Burk and they have yellow sticky rice. - Is it good? - It's fine. - You've been in Japan? - No. - That's where I want to go. That's probably the number one, if you're like, hey, you got to leave today. - Yeah. - And you can go anywhere in the world. - Japan, what calls you about Japan? - I don't know, I think it's probably partly because we were supposed to gather and we didn't. But now I'm kind of like, hey. - That's a fresh business. - But I would love, I don't know, I see a lot of stuff on YouTube about Japan, looks pretty sick. - Dude, I saw I was looking at the snow once for like all through Colorado and Utah and Vancouver and like where's the best, whatever. And then it was like, oh, this is, you know, the ski report. But then it was like, oh, but there's just a place in Japan that has double that snow of anywhere in the states. - Yeah, and apparently it's like the purist. - What is that? Where's that place? - I don't know. - I really want to get there. - I would 100% go to Japan tomorrow if it was possible. - By the way, I heard they love old school country music there. - Really? - Not a joke. This is what we just had last time left in our pockets looking at. - I don't know if they would like this new record. - I bet they would. - We should give it to them. Let's give this record to Japan. - To Japan? - Let's give it to Japan. - I mean, it looks like it's like, as a gift for the entire country. - The way they gave us was Apple Blossom, Cherry Blossoms. - They gave us some cherry blossoms. - Yeah, I think along the National Mall, D.C., all those like the cherry blossoms are coming over here. - I didn't know that. - I think that's from Japan. Could have been China. - One of the stamps on them. - Maybe. - Maybe they put both in there. - Some Bluetooth trees. - Through Japan, after we really fucking-- - Bluetooth Cherry Blossoms, that sounds legit. - Yeah, they're like, what do you guys say? - They're like, what? - They reject all cookies. - Yeah, no, they love country music. They love old country western music. - I'm surprised, Jen's been there. - Yeah, I should weigh a night at Tokyo's, what is this? - I did see a video about it. - This is a Texas deep bar. - I saw a video called Bluegrass Borin. It was like the smallest school's Bluegrass Borin. I was like, this video's gonna ruin that. - Is it right? - Yeah, no, no, you're gonna have-- - You have to see. - You're gonna be like, we have, which seven million Americans here a year. - That's a long time. - It's cool to know. - Yeah, dude, as soon as you mention anything, so you know what I do usually is I bleep, bleep places out. - Yeah, everybody's got all the secrets, man. - I know. You ever find a cool bar, you live in a Nashville? - I live here. - You live here? Oh, okay, over there from Nashville. - Well, there's no Santanille. - Yeah, so you find a cool spot and you're like, oh, this is awesome. And then like, you go back again, like, no, it's great. You bring your wife, like, this is fucking sick. And then a month later, you're like, why is there a balancer now in a line? - There is like a really cool secret bar in Austin that I went to a couple of times. - Really? - Yeah, and that's all I can say about it. - Yeah, don't say it. - Do you know anything about this? - Describe some of it. - Or are you saying no? - Because I know a secret one. - Yeah, it's very secret. And there's a room. - Yeah. - In the back with a big bowl. - Bowl? - Bowl? - Just a bowl. - Yeah. - Bowl bowl and a nice, you know, it's filled with lots of stuff. I don't know that one time. - I don't know that bar. - You never been there? - Uh-uh. - Well, maybe you're saying no, because you're-- - Is that Tony's place? - I don't know. I don't remember the guy's name. I went there a couple of times. It was wild. - Really? - Yeah. - You got to like, know somebody, know somebody. Yeah. - Where was this part? - You don't know about this? - I don't think so. - Well, you'll find out at some point. And then you're gonna remember this conversation. You're gonna be like, "Oh yeah, Parker's telling about that place." - Yeah. - And then you'll always see like, I don't want to name any names, but like some, there's like massive global celebrities in there. - Really? - Yeah, sometimes. - What's in the bowl of Drina Crumbs? - Uh, some of that Japan powder, man. - Yeah, nice. (laughing) - No, it's the-- - Dude, I did it a girl there once that she could tell. You could put a pill in her hand behind her back and she could tell you what pill it was in the dosage. - It's not a good talent to have. (laughing) - It was crazy. - Not that impressive nonetheless, but not a good talent to have. - You know how she ate pills? - With them still behind her back. Oh no. - Yeah. - I never understood that. - It's hit harder, I guess. - I know, it wouldn't have taken long, or it wouldn't have been, it's harder. - It's harder, faster. - I don't know. - It's that or boofin? - I've never done that. - Hey guys, you know who's cool? - That's right, we're all thinking the same guy. And you know why he's cool? Nah, some of you might have the wrong answer here. Nah, it's not 'cause he had sex with his maid and had a child with her and raised him as if it was this full-blooded marriage child. It's 'cause while he was dealing with all of these, he was smoking a cigar. So, Arnold Schwarzenegger smoked cigars. He's one that covers cigar-oficionato. But how do you get 'em? You're new to it. Woo, that's high. High, what that maid did. Turn 'em on. They have the largest selection, unbeatable prices and customer service, experience, a second and none. Whether you're new to cigars or seasoned, aficionato. cigars international takes and joins cigars, makes 'em easy, approachable, and fun. And now, they're offering free everyday shipping on cigars international. So, no cozy minimums. cigars international is the go-to really for all, retailer for all things cigars. Biggest election. I love 'em. He was out of 'em. Use my code, "trippin' at checkout" for 20% off your order of $50 or more. Or visit cigarsinternational.com, www.cigarsinternational.com/trippin and the discount will automatically apply. But it's a solid gift and a solid pickup. - Yeah, I've never boofed anything. Those guys all out there, they love boofin. - I did the Keith one time. - You boof, Keith? - Yeah. - That's it, you have to light it up. - That's a bad one. - You light it up and boofin? - Then on the lighter, man. - Oh yeah. - Yeah. - Worst idea ever. - Dude, necessity is a mother of an invention. - Yeah, it's, that was a one-time deal, lowly recommended. - You feel like grainy? - Yeah, I need to go to the hospital right now. But I'm going to high school, my mom's asleep, and I don't want to wake her up and tell her what I did. - It's like, you know, I got to get up to the Matterhorn tomorrow. - Yeah, she's climbing the Matterhorn tomorrow. Sorry, mom, we got to go to the hospital. (laughing) - How was the skin out there? Did you do well? - It's no work. - You know, it's kind of funny, you go all the way over there, and I sat in my collarbone a few years before that, skiing in Colorado, had a music festival about an hour before we were supposed to go on stage. - Oh. - And so I, I, I, I don't go as hard as I used to, you know? I do, especially, we were like, coming back starting a tour and stuff. So I was, I was taking easy, but like, dude, the first day we get there, we immediately, we get there like middle of the day. We're like, okay, let's go hit some afternoon runs before the mountain closes. - Nice. - And we don't know anywhere to go. So like, the first place we go is the most populated, so much traffic on it. You know, we don't know anything about anything yet. And I mean, 10 minutes after we get on the very first run, this little kid comes flying in front of me and cuts me off, you know, and I like, I'm sliding out of control and I'm sliding like an ice wall. And the first thing to hit the wall is like, the, the, you know, bony part of your hip that sticks out. And I'm like, I'm like, I'm laying there and I'm like, I just flew to the moon to snowboard like an 80-bit. And, and I can't, and I'm done. Or we, I've had the, I've had my board on for one hour, not even 30 minutes. And so I'm like, I lay there for like 10, 15 minutes and I'm like, I gotta get down the mountain. So we ended up not being as bad. It was like, at first I was like, you broke it. Yeah. And then it got real bruised and it looked nasty but I still boarded the whole time we were there. I think I took one day, I was like, hey, like it's, it's pretty, it's pretty gnarly, yeah. And it was fine, but other than that, it skied pretty well. - You did your rain parks usually? - Man, I feel real, real lightly, you know, usually just go look at them. - Yeah. - Nowadays. - And so me and O'Neal are, we'll get there. - Yeah. - You know, there's always like 17 to 25 year old, and you can just tell they're like sick. - Yeah. - And they're like waiting and then they'll like look at you and they're like, if you wanna go, you can go. I'm like, I said, there's a range of years where you cannot be embarrassed to try and for no people who are good. You know, when you're like six years old, you're like, can I go and ask? - Yeah. - And it doesn't matter. And then it's right about 12. You're like, I'm so embarrassed, I'm as good as them. And then it 40 onwards, you're like, I don't give a fuck. - Yeah. - I'm gonna get about eight inches of air and I'm gonna expect high five. - It feels like you're 17 feet off the ground. - Oh my god. - Yeah. You ever go to one of those jumps and as you get to the top, you're just like noob. Oh yeah, you just like, you just completely, yeah, you just back out immediately all the time. You know, if I get the same run a few times, you know, there might be a little tree spot you can pop in and out of like, you know, the locals got some, some little place where you can catch air off kind of the side of the run and I'll be like, oh, I'm gonna hit them on the way down. Yeah, he's like, oh, I'll get that next time. Yeah, then you get to him and you come in a little too hot and you're like, get noob the other way around. Yeah. You're like, no, but you're like, you're like straight lighting right before like, I'm gonna do this. It's all about the entry, dude. And if you're like, if you're in the right position, right before, and that's what I didn't love about the Switzerland skiing is that there wasn't a ton of those opportunities on the map. Jumps like that. Yeah. Just a little, I'm not trying, look, I ain't trying to hit the half bite. Yeah. You know, you just little grab, little grab, oh, you got good, I mean, I'm talking, you know, blow, blow, you know, just, no, you can jump and touch. Wow. Yeah. That's fucking high level. You can also reach down with the board on the ground and touch it. Yeah, fair. But there, there was like, when I say like the character of the mountain, like, it felt like the ski culture over there was much more just like, leisure activity, kind of straight up and down, you know, where they're placing the woods to go smoke. Damn. That's the best thing. I don't think if we ever found any over there. I can't remember. In Colorado, you just ski in there, you're just like, I smoke weed. And then you see like, I'm a whiff, I'm an out of it. Yeah. It might be me. Yeah. I mean, it's, that's how I wrote my collarbone. Smoking too much. I wrote ripin' dabs and gauntlet. Coughing and then. Yeah. Wow. We ripin' dabs and so like, I get out of the gauntlet and I'm like, right, here we go. I'm like, ripin' dabs. Like with like a torch? No, the whole deal. Yeah. You had a rig on the. The guy did, I didn't. What? Yeah. And that's really how I wrote my collarbone. But, um. Yeah. But I almost stickin' out and everything, dude. Wait, what? Yeah. Wait, wait. How do you break your collarbone doing dabs? You were fucked up. Yeah. And that's why, yeah. That's nice. And we were like playing this music festival when we were supposed to go on stage and like, we were like an hour. I had already sound checked. And I was like, having to go for one more run. Famous last word. Yeah. I'll never say that again. Anytime I'm skiing now, somebody says, hey, let's do one more. I'm like, hey, hey, hey, hey. No, we're done. Yeah, without an injury. That's it. Yeah. If you say that, I've already done my last run. Yeah. I always try to hit those jumps. Because when I do hit my last run, I'm like, what am I think the most dangerous? Yeah. When I'm the most tired? Yeah. And when you've made it through the whole day, safely, and it's like, hmm, now, let's just put it on a table. Yeah. But part of it also is like, if I do get injured, I didn't waste the day. Yeah. And you end up having a yard sale, you know, on the green, on the way home. And you just shits everywhere in some old lady's shop. And she's like, all right. You're like, lady, dude, I look okay right now. And my bone is sticking out of my body. You ever ski blown out? You ever ski on coke? No. That's like, I've done mushrooms, skater and acid, weed, obviously, and drunk. I'm the worst drunk. Yeah. Drunk would be difficult. I feel like. First, it's like, okay, I'm going to feel good, and then like a couple of beers later at the altitude. Well, it's just like anything else. That's all right. There's that little window, where it's all good, you know, and you just never can stop right there. I had a window yesterday from about hour two to three drinking with it, derosing all those pigs. And I was like, this is nice. And then hour four and five and five and a half was like, what am I? Nine nights. Guys, I'm done. The, you know, I really don't drink a lot. I never really have been a big drunk. You see? The boy, every hell you, my favorite, boy, like I drink, just not beer. When I was in Switzerland, I really did. Yeah. We actually drank quite a bit over there. Nice. Mm-hmm. That's cool. It was like, you know, it was just the boys and we were doing a thing like every night you're going out to these nice restaurants, like trying to try them, the culture and the food. Like they went, you know, getting wine and kind of all the stuff. So, and you're not sleeping, you know, you're just up all night, because you can't, you know, you're on the other side of the rock. So. It's hard just no more two here, that tire. Do it with someone time I was trying. You ever take Adderole before using a board? No, I would. What am I going to do? Clean the mountain. Yeah. It's a good time. Really? Yeah. Okay. It's like, those two of everything that everybody, anybody that takes Adderole, if you're not riding songs or snowboarding, you're just not doing what it was made for. Okay. Yeah. Adderole. What do you do? What's the most efficient way to get down the mountain? No, you do. Think about it. You're not talking to anybody while you're skiing. No. It's like, you just got your headphones in. You're just jamming and you're fucking dialed. And like, we, like, when we, you know what I'm going to do, like, we're, like, we get up, we're the first people on the lift and we go all day. And like, we go hard and we go, just try to make the most of your time. And I'm always doing quick trips just like popping there and popping back, you know, like, ski two and a half days back, two and a half days back, and not in Switzerland and Colorado. Yeah. And, you know, it's like sunrise, it's not sunrise, but, you know, it's morning time. All the runs are still groomed. You're the first one down on me on a 20 milli and you're just like, find me a better scenario on this planet. You know. Yeah. It's, I'm like, I'm real dude. Really? It's unreal. And you're just, I mean, you're, you're, you're invincible. I mean, you never think of a song on an out of roll on Addy's toy. That's a better term while you're skiing. Yeah, all the time. Like on the mountain. Yeah. We sound like, oh, that could be something. Cause like, a lot of times, like, I was just like, I was just like, I was on a horse, or I was on my full wheeler, whatever as a kid. Like, and I was just hauling and asked somewhere, like, I was singing so loud the whole time. It's like, when I'm snowboarding, I'm singing so loud the whole time. Really? Like it may be. Singing along? Yeah, it may be, you know, I don't know, Kentucky Bluebird by Keith Whitley, and I'm hauling asked down the mountain, and I'm as loud as I can, and Kentucky Bluebird, I heard yourself today. I mean, loud. Well, I'm ripping. You're on 20 million. You're filling. I mean, what's the starter amount? You're where you're supposed to be. What's up? What's like a rookie amount of, of Millies? I think a 10's, a nice 10. Okay. I gave my dad one one time. He had never had one before. You're telling him? He's never had a sip of coffee. He's never done a drug, never smoked a cigarette. My dad's a fucking machine. And I was like, I gave him a Adderall one time, and I was like, there's a 10 million. I was like, hey, you should try this, you know? You skipped coffee and went to Adderall? Well, I've drank coffee before. For your dad? Yeah. Wow. Yeah. But he was like, he tried to tell me he never felt anything. And I was like, in life and his heart. He was like, did you play golf? Would you shoot? And he's like, I shot even poor. And like, I think you were feeling it. Yeah. Yeah. I think you felt it. On Adderall? Yeah. Exactly. Yeah. He just not, my dad's so pure dude. Just no. And he's the craziest grinder, hustler, crazy work ethic and it's just, yeah, it's pure dude. I remember the first time you start to blow and then you're like, I don't think I feel it. And then your friends like, you've been telling me about a lot of inventions. Yeah. Yeah. Hey, by the way, we've been doing it for 12 hours. Yeah. Okay. Stop telling me it's work. It's not. Yeah. What was I just going to say about the fucking slopes? Damn, I forgot. I lost it. It doesn't matter, dude. It doesn't matter. It doesn't matter. Nothing really matters. I love. I love it. There's other places that I would like to, I would like to go, I thought that was awesome to go. I was like, do we want snow? Even just to say, we went snowboarding in Switzerland. Yeah. It's cool. Yeah, it's cool. There was a high level breakfast. It was so sick, dude. I wish I had, I've got it somewhere in the deep, deep dive of my phone. This video of me when we got there, I'm so delirious, but it was just, I don't know, man, it was like, it was the trip of a lifetime. Yeah, that's nice. And I just have been touring for so long, you know, in continental U.S. just, you know, Thursday, Friday, Saturday for 12 years. Oh, take off from time. I haven't taken a ton of time to do anything like that, so it was cool to actually go do it. Yeah. You got to do more of it. I think I will. I mean, you're doing well. I just had a kid two weeks ago, so it's a good time to go to Japan. Absentee dad. Yeah. Get the fuck out. Yeah. These. These the years you'll never forget if you're not there to remember. Yeah. It's like, what does that kid look like? I don't know. I don't know. Some small, I think. Yeah. He's small last time I saw him. Yeah. Yeah. He's too hot. Yeah. Dad, you missed my whole life. It was like, I was in Japan, bro. Yeah. Snow's great. Don't call me bro, dad. By the way, snow's great over there, son. How do you get, do you find, how do you find, well, allegedly, how did you find stuff when you're, when you're on the road? Got someone hooking it up? Uh, stuff is in stuff. Yeah. No stuff anymore. What? Yeah. Yeah. What do you think about it? Sorry. I mean, you get to a point in your career where people are paying, oh, you know, their hard earned money to come, you may be the one concert they're going to see all year. Yeah. So it's like, if you're going to go out there all fucked up, looking like shit and sounding like shit. Oh, it fucks your voice. Well, yeah, I just like, I mean, if you've done stuff to any degree for more than one time. Yeah. After the show, though. Yeah. No, dude, you know, it's crazy. It's, I bet I'm in bed. I bet I'm in my bunk on my bus within 60 minutes of the show every night. Yeah. Whichever we didn't know, it wouldn't always like that. But I mean, now it's like, I want to feel so good on stage and rested and like put on, and like these, especially to a big show, I don't want these people coming to see me and being like, man, he has, you know, I just feel like he hadn't slept. Yeah. I booth this out. I roll to come to a fucking nice place. And that's what I'm saying. I've played on that. a couple of times. Yeah. It's pretty good. Yeah. Yeah. It's pretty good. It's a lot though. You're up there. You're like, whoa dude. Like you're floored. And the whole band like every song you're playing is like twice as fast. Yeah, you're dropping like more faster. You know, and everybody's like, what in the world going on? It's kind of like the same thing. Like every now and then you'll run into it on the road. You know, if you get sick, you know, you don't want to cancel. You can take us, you can get a steroid like in an IV and reduce inflammation. You can go from like not being able to talk to being able to like sing like you've never sang before. But it's terrible for your voice, but you get if you've got a merge situation where you do it. And that's pretty similar to it. You you're out there like, I mean, you're on drugs literally. You're on prescription legalized drugs. You're always hated when you get off stage and you're like, okay, you're on stage doing your shift for 90 minutes or so. I don't know. Whatever. Yeah. And then you're like back to the bus. And then wherever like the opening band is or like tour managers like, well, I've been drinking for 85 of your minutes. And you're like, you guys are already fucked up. And then you have to catch up. Man, not back in the day yet. Yeah. Now like I think everybody is so professional. Like and I think a lot of that probably started when I started cleaning it up. You know, really? Yeah. You're like, let's get around yourself with people who make a decision. Slowly. Yeah. Over a long period of time. Yeah. I mean, you just you finally like, you know, you're chasing these dreams, you know, like with these little kid aspirations, you know, it's so like it's like this magical thing you think it is. And then you get it and you're like, well, I don't want to be the guy who used to be doing it. Yeah. And so that's that stuff is has led a lot of people to be the guy that used to be doing it. So I remember a lot of document, not talking biographies about bands. And he goes, as soon as you enter heroin into it is winning. Yeah. I can see. I bet it's good for a little while. I bet it's great for a little while. Yeah. Nobody's like, man, mid. Yeah. Nobody. That's the bad reviews, you know, that one knows what you like and just got good taste. So that's that's a fucking country. So yeah, I've tried that thought about that. That was a good taste. But it's, I don't know, man. I've just the older I get, the more I'm like lies pretty dope. You know, it's pretty, pretty rowdy that we're here. Yeah. The real dope is life. Yeah. And yes, it really is. Well done. You have to ride. But yeah, it's, I like, I'm like old man about it now. I'm like, I really, I really enjoy being aware and like mentally present and, no, it's cool to put on a great show. It's way more fulfilling now. And when you don't put on a good show or when things aren't going well and you're all fucked up or hung over whatever, like it's just the compounds and you have a direct reason as to why it's not, you know, yeah, I'll start slurring. Yeah. I get. When I got married to, you know, like, you know, I made like the greatest woman God's ever made. She's the purist human being of all time. So insulting to your mom. Yeah. Yeah. She's going to watch, she watches everything I do. And she's, she's probably going to still tell me she's going. Hey, mama, actually, I actually think you are the greatest. His wife already does. Yeah. I know. But you're the man, lady. But I did. And so when I, when I, you know, highly raised my wife's name, like, you know, it's, you can't be all fucked up all the time doing that, you know. Yeah. Yeah. You're dad now too. It just, it just, you're just, you're bearing yourself before you ever even fucking star. Sure. It's fun though. Yeah. I mean, dude, look, I got plenty of it in. Yeah. I got it all in in this town. So yeah. This is like, yeah. I guess, you know, who's cool? That's right. We're all thinking the same guy, Arnold Schwarzenegger. And you know, why is school? No, it's not because he had sex with his maid and had a child with her and raised him as if it was his full blooded marriage child. He's one that covers cigar aficionado. You're new to it. If you're a guy, you know, it's cool. Oh, that's hot. Probably what that made it turn him on. Well, that's for cigars. International comes into play. They have the largest selection, unbeatable prices and customer service, experience, a second and none, whether you're new to cigars or seasoned aficionado. cigars. International takes and joins cigars makes him easy, approachable and fun. No, no, no, no, no, no, cigars international is the go-to really for all retailer for all things cigars. Biggest selection. I love it. Gone. Go. He was out of them. Use my code. Trippin at checkout for 20% off your order of $50 or more or visit cigarsinternational.com. www.cigarsinternational.com/trippin and the discount will automatically apply. Guys, I have some exclusions of why. It's a party town. I noticed town well. Yeah. I've only ever come here on like little like festivals and like the memories that go through my head when I drive through this city. I'm just like through up there. I'm so grateful to still be here. It might have drunk driving. I've done here too with the people from here. You know what I'll do is I never, because I never really drank much. Yeah. Adderall driving. I never had to worry about drunk driving. Adderall driving is the safest driving in the world. It's the safest drive. Oh, dude, you're focused ready. Yeah, you're good for the red. You're a positive impact on the road. Yeah. Yeah. I found Molly driving is the best, you're the most courteous. You're like, sir, sir, I can see you're trying to merge. Please, I've been where you are. Please, sir. You like Molly? Dude. Is it, is it, is it, is there, do you, do you take it often? No, but enough. A couple of times a year. You will a couple of times a year. Do you two like still hits the same? You're always chasing that fucking first time with any drug. Yeah, you're always like that first time like any drug. Well, you don't ever quite get back there. Yeah, you don't. But man, Molly, I've had some, yeah, you've done it. Yeah, you just have, you just feel great. Yes, we're good. It works. It works. Yeah. It does work. Yeah, where it is, it is some good bang for your buck. You know, it's the worst when Molly doesn't hit and you're like, I can't believe he didn't hit. And now I'm not even in a good enough move to overcome my bad feelings about it. I never, Molly didn't hit. I probably did two or three times. Shane Gill has brought some to a house party once. He was bunk Molly. I'm still mad at him. What time I did it on a Monday night and went to downtown Austin on Halloween. That's nothing. I just saw Molly on a Monday night. Molly on a Monday night. Yeah. I know her. Man, I'll stay what I can. But I wore it. We would, is Halloween on a Monday night. And we were thinking like it's going to be bumping on six street. Yeah. And we go on the small to six street and nobody's there. But Halloween is empty. What? We had the best time. Ran it. Best time, dude. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It was, it was, yeah, that's, it works every time. Run the play. Yeah, you just have a blast. 6% of the time. It works. Hey, can I just tell you, man, I'm so glad we're friends. And like the craziest shit will happen on it, too. Like, I feel like it's just the most improbable great shit. Like, it just presents your own stuff just like, I mean, you could, you could close your eyes at half court on Molly and throw the ball straight up into the air and it would somehow go on the goal. Like, it's just, I don't know why it was that way. But snake man, I'll come up to you. Like, you want to put things? Yes, snake man, absolutely. But dude, I will say like a lot, like, a lot of those times that I was participating in some of those things. A lot of those years, like, we're so pivotal to like, it's like, you know, it's almost like the theory, like, if you shelter your kid too much, they're going to get out in the real world and just go fucking bonkers. Yeah. It's like, honest, like, I would, which, experiencing all that and like, getting it out of my system was actually really a positive thing. Yeah, and then you learn how to like relate to people. Then you learn how to do it just two or three times a year and manage it, you know? Mushrooms are always, that's the one thing I'm like, that's the only drug I would ever recommend. I'd be like, yeah, I would do it. If you enjoy like any kind of deep thinking or if you ask any of like the very human questions of like, why is anything here? That whole rabbit hole, like, that's a good place to go. I don't think, I mean, people that like, microdose and stuff, I'm like, I don't know how you'll do that. Instead of like, go hog. Yeah. The only times I've ever done it, I've like gone all the way there. I think it takes you where it wants to take you to. Yeah. You have a little control. You can, you can influence the environment a little bit. Why not? Well, like if you're around the right people, like, you don't want to be doing it with people that aren't doing it, you know? Like, that's just, you know, like, if you're in the right environment and like, you know, you give yourself the best chance for it to be a positive experience. Yeah. You know, but I mean, like, how deep it gets you is almost like, I've taken like, just a little and hits you hard. I take it a lot where I'm like, I'm kind of okay on it. And it's like up to my like you don't really need this today. - Yeah, mushrooms are great, dude. - So that, I'm saying like capin' a stem on a mountain skin or snowboarding. - I don't know how I would do with that. - You're not flying, but your mind that could do whatever. - I couldn't even sandwich on those things. - You have to take a little less than that for that. - She'd be like an hour and a half to make a sandwich one time on the shit. - Really? - Yeah. - She's stilling at the bridge. - I think I like, I think I like took a nap and then came back to the sandwich. You know, I'm like, as far as doing that, man. - Yeah, I can figure out how to slice the bridge. - Right, I got, okay, I need two pieces of bread. Just, you know, it's a wild ride. - I love that way you got to really think. And you're like, you go, it's that way where you're high, you get up to go to the kitchen and you're like, what was I doing here? - We can figure this out. - I just think there is a positive, you know, it's like there's drugs that are bad for you. - Yeah. - And then, you know, like mushrooms that grow from the ground that I actually do think there is a benefit to like your critical thinking and like those kinds of tangible skills that you have. - Yeah. - Hopefully you have. Like I think that's, to a certain extent, you know, I'm not saying you should eat them every day to increase your critical thinking skills. But, you know, one or two times in like an impression, in those impressionable years is I think it was good for me. And when you start taking them, how old ish? - I don't know, I was probably 29 or 29. - Okay, okay. Yeah, me go. Yeah, and also, the cool thing is you're playing through a lot of people who are definitely on mushrooms. - I wonder about that some kind of thing. I'm like, I wonder how many people have a little bullet in their pocket and they're just ripping bumps or-- - Some. - Because you can always smell the weed. - Yeah. - It's gotta be some. - Yeah, like I have a song called "Stone" and like every night that we play that song all of a sudden, it's just like-- - You see the puff. - Well, yeah, you can just smell it. You're just like, oh yeah, wow, that's, you know, when you eat smells like the first time you smell it, it's like very distinct. Like it doesn't always smell like that. But like if you're the festival and you smell it, it's that's how it smells. It's very like, I don't know, it's like back when you used to buy like, you know, shwag, you know, and you would like-- - I wasn't sure. - You'd buy a dime bag. Like that when it smelled like that. That's how it smells on stage and I love that. - Oh, that's great, you're playing, you're like, okay. - Yeah, and you're like, dude, it's so like, it's music. It's live music, the crowd, it's Friday night. They're vibe and they're doing their thing. Like, you know, they worked all week. They're here and now, like, they're enjoying it. Just, I'm like, yeah, all right, here we go. - I'm throwing it's the best, so it'd be a song like that playing during the audience. And then somebody, like, you see somebody like, pastor, they're like, oh, hell yes. And it's just like the perfect timing, man, yeah. - But nowadays, no telling what's in that joint. - Hopefully at least weed. - Yeah, hopefully, at least weed. - I don't know, man. I feel like no one's laced in joints with more expensive stuff. - Did you ever, what was, oh, what they're called, splits? - Yeah. - Where you would mix to back up? - To back up? - Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's funny. - I always suppose we're nice. - Everybody in Europe smokes weed that way in England. - Really? - That's it, all do that. And then I was in Scotland once at a festival, the comedy festival, and I rolled the joint. And then I like, we're all out in the bar. And I passed one and somebody like, smokes and start coughing and it passed. He was like, was that a pure? And I was like, I'm just a joint. - Yeah, right, I'm like, oh, what? Is that a, you kind of warn people. I'm like, bro, that's how everyone smokes joints around front. - Yeah. - And they're like, well, who smokes it with tobacco in it? I'm like, blacks. - I didn't know that that was a British thing, or a European thing, but it makes sense. Now that I like to think about that. - 'Cause you're all smoked, they're cigarettes anyway. - That's, it gives me a very European vibe now that I've connected those jobs. - Yeah. You're talking about weed now. You gotta like do something. - Yeah, I gotta get that by store. This is like my one vice right here. - Yeah, that in Jesus. - That in Jesus. - Yeah. - Love me some Jesus. I don't remember the last time I even saw somebody smoking a split. - Really? - Yeah. - Well, they also covers up the smell. If you want to get away with it. - A little bit. - A little bit. - Yeah. - But. - Didn't they just make some law in Texas, like a weed pin, like minimum six months in jail? - Why does anyone live here? - Because they like the heat. (laughs) - Can't get on porn sites. - I thought I ever would. I like the real thing. - You can't get on a couple of them. - You can get on a couple of them. It's such a sad Google search to go, which porn sites can you still access while it's Texas? - Yeah, that's it, yeah. - And then it gives you, like, I've never heard of those. - Yeah, there's a tough loot. - Tough loot. - That's a tough loot. - Made comes in in Medi. - You could just, I don't know. You should get a bumper sticker. You should sell bumper stickers and say that. Do you have bumper stickers on your car? - No. - I don't know. I don't have anybody close to me that has their car covered in bumper stickers either. And I think that's a good thing. - Yeah, I probably, it's probably society healing. - Yeah. I'm like, you know, but you still see it. And I'm like, it's such a, we should do that documentary as well. - What happened to bumper stickers? - No, no, not what happened to bumper stickers. - Who? - Who are these people? - Who are they? Okay, I have a theory. We're going to prove it. - Who's the bumper sticker market? Who's the main primary demographic? - The stereotype is, duck dynasty type people. Old redness. - Do you think so? - It's a stereotype. The fucking crystal women from like the bay, you know? - Like the co-existent. - Exactly. - All that shit. - All that, yeah. It'll be like super. - Just covered in bumper stickers. - Yeah. - I just want to study this psychology behind it because I'm like, are you, is your goal to influence and? - Make people laugh? - Or just, you know? - If you can read this, you're too close. - Yeah, like when you were walking outside to put it on your coat, when you got that bumper sticker, like are you ordering them online? Did you buy them at a store? What was your mindset when you were walking outside? You're like, hmm, I'm going to put this one. This is the first one. - Get a station truck stopping and you're just like, oh. - Every year and you're stalking at Christmas, you have a new bumper sticker. - A dumb fucking bumper sticker. - You're like, I know what you'd like. - Yeah. - You got it. - You got it. - It's a real estate. - You know, I love my dog more than humans or, you know, just rain and shit. And I'm like, why'd you put that on your car? - You see the 24.6 people are 26.4 whatever, the marathon people, which is listed the mile. - Me and Marathon do not. - I think any man who has run a marathon is a homosexual. - Me and, which wouldn't be a bad thing. - Yeah. - Yeah. - Which would be bad. - They're running two ass and away from their demons. - They're a lot of them were chasing ass. - Yeah. We have a friend who ran one. He ran a drunk. - He ran it drunk. You're gonna finish it. - Yeah, he did. - Is he still alive? - I don't know. - That was like my biggest fear. - It was like marrying somebody whose family didn't marathon. - And then you got to be into it, cheer 'em on. - No way. - No way. - No way. - I love to work out and try to be as healthy as I can. All things considered, but man, running 26 miles while I have a $80,000 truck. - Carousel. - Carousel. - It seems dumb. - It seems. - It seems to be. - I've got this truck I bought. - And I get it, but I need to go 26 miles that way. I'm just gonna fucking run. - Yeah. (laughing) - We're all in each other. - Yeah, but then I'm gonna get a ride back. - Yeah, oh yeah, exactly. Why don't you run 13 miles out? - Yeah, how many people will run the marathon? - I'm run 13 back. - Yeah. How many people will run the marathon home? - Yeah, that's dumb. Why go out there and again? - It would be a little more incentivized to run the marathon though if the finish line was at my house. - 26 miles, 13 out, 13 back. - Yeah, if you're like, hey, you can get home in six hours on Southwest, you can get home in five hours running, and you don't have to go through security. I'd be like, I'm fucking not just running. - Yeah, that, if it was like two hours. - But it's not, it's always like in the middle of Boston. You know, you cross the finish line, you're in the middle of a massive city. - Traffic's everywhere. - Yeah, there's cones, a lot of cones. People cheating, there's documentaries on that. - That's fine. I mean, who are you cheating yourself? You're not gonna win. - But like, how balls that to like be in the marathon? - Get on a bus. - And get it, like back of the guy at the back of the day, like the Boston Marathon, New York Marathon, whatever it was, I got a taxi, breaks the record. He's just celebrating, he's drinking beers with him in the bar. - I did it. - He gets out and then just joins everybody fresh. - Then like CCTV footage shows up, and it's like him, hell, in this cab. - Yeah, and then pretending to have a shoe, and then just getting it with everybody. Oh my God. And then you know, the cab driver's like, why are you dressed like? - You should do that. - Okay. - You should, you should enter the Boston Marathon and just cheat your ass. - Yeah, let me try to get Bert to do another marathon fall behind, then I'll catch up. - So low helicopters, I think you can order them on the internet and just assemble them at your house. - Hold on and go. - Yeah. - I'll be in particular. (laughing) - Yeah, no marathons from me, I ain't doing it. - Parker, you got any travel tips before we go? - Um, just stay home. - Just stay home, that's pretty nice. It's not even do it. - Yeah, just stay home, that's not bad. A lot of tourists out there, a lot of robbers. - Yeah. - Pickpocketing, you know, I feel like anytime you're in another country, people are like, hey. - They're really careful. - I've never seen it. I've YouTube this by the way. - Well, that's the joke you can't see. - And there's like guys that are like, I know how to pickpock it. And I'm like, you watch them do it and you're like, how the fuck did that person not just see you give them a hug? - Yeah. If a random person walking down the street, if you can get my, I wear a heavy-starched jeans. If you can get my wallet out of these, you can fucking have it, you know, without me knowing. - Yeah. - Of course it would be. - So it's one other, a different country there. - Yeah. - But I guess it's not really good on pickpockets. We do a lot of great stuff. - You go a lot of places on this, on this, do your beer. - Yeah, there's pickpockets. - People warn you about that when you go, but yeah, they're like, hey, watch out in Indonesia, 'cause. - Dude in Brazil, everybody in Newark Hossles, every other person, how their phone's looking. another pocket. Like you got to get fanny books. I don't know. But I went up on my last nights there. I was getting some street meat and some homelessy guy pretty much was like buy me a skewer and I was like, yeah, all right, whatever. And then I'm like fine. And I go, I'm like, fucking push it it, but okay, fine. And then the people behind the counter pretty much are like, I'm trying to translate this from whatever Portuguese, but they're like, leave the guy alone, stop fucking with our, you know, customers. And he just grabbed my, my pocket goes, I could have taken his phone. He left his phone in his pocket. So talented. What's he doing on the street? I don't know. Getting phones. Put a pickpocket. Yeah. There's none of it. That's my advice. That's my tip. That's not bad. It's traveling. Watch out for this big pocket because it's apparently pretty big deal. Like this. Yeah. Oh, I was trapping your pocket. You got to strap it across your chest like all the kids are doing nowadays. One of those. Yeah. I want to call, but I don't know. Marathon packet. We really wanted to put them like put it in a condom. Put it in a condom. That's a way. Yeah. No way. Just pick pocket. Pick pocket condoms. Yeah. If you hear the squeaking and whatever. They'll go anywhere in the world. Yeah. Um, buddy, thanks for coming in. This is cool. It's cool. That was absolutely insane. Dude, I've been the fan years for really a long time. Where you don't be from? Some videos online. Yeah. What's it? What's the update on those? They're still there. Like does anybody ever give a shit any shit about? Oh, yeah. Every four or five years, somebody knew will discover them. Yeah. And be like, what the fuck was in? I don't know. Was that like 2006? Okay. When I saw them on early, early YouTube. Yeah. And we still quote those videos to this day. Like my buddies from high, like when I told one of my very best buds from high school, I called him yesterday and I'm like, Hey, do you remember the amazing races? Do you remember these videos? And he's like, yeah, and he started to do, like I can't even say another sentence because he's just word for word, quoting every one of them from top to bottom. Every one of them. And I'm like, yeah, I'm going on his show tomorrow. And he's like, he's still alive. And I'm like, yes. And then like, like he's like started going to legal. He's like, oh, dude, I see him all the time. He didn't realize that that was a connection. Dude, he had no idea that that was the same guy, which may be the best case scenario. Yeah, probably. Probably. Yeah. He was like, you're going to ask him about it. And I was like, I'm not going to bring him up unless he does. Dude, it brought 14-year-old boys joy on another level. Dude, it was so ahead of its time. It was so ahead of its time, you would have been that that would go or something like you said every four or five years, I'm sure it does. But yeah, some kid will be like, doesn't shut it off for his teacher. It was great. There was no stage around. Well, this one. No, but like when you're in the gas station or when you're in the dry cleaner. So we talked to the guys, we talked to the guy who owned the dry cleaner or the liquor store. And I was like, when is a black and what can we do this? When is a black employee going to be here? I'll pay you a hundred bucks. So like, tell me. And so then you go in there with like a cross with a clan outfit on. I'm like, I need a lighter really quickly. I fucked up. It's unbelievable. The guy had a gas pump. Yeah, and like those were not paid actors. And then sometimes you would inadvertently, like, okay, it'll fuck with this guy. And then someone else would see you. I'm like, yo, yo, no. And you're like, oh, I guess this is you know. But those people, they had no idea. Dude, we had it. Yeah, we had an Amtrak worker screech on his like his breaks and like get out. We're just doing a set up scene of like, I'm crossing the tracks to the by the side of town. And he just grabbed me and like, shut me up against a fence. And it was like, it's starting to try to hit me. And then it's like, I'm Jewish. I'm Jewish. It's a prank. I'm not sort of thing. And did it ever go south to far south? Yeah. Oh, we got the window of the truck we rented to like, I think I was like the thing was like, I was lost looking for a KKK rally. Yeah. And I was asking random black men on the street, where, where, for directions, where I lay off it. And some homeless guy took a, we had to get a pickup truck for it to, to, you know, fit in for like, he took a bottle of all the bottles. I think chucked it right over to his head and cracked the windshield. But then we're like, do we get insurance on this? And they're like, yeah, I'm like, well, like, you see like all these kids in nowadays, they get like, they go in the Walmart's and like targets. And that's how they get their content. Like, they just fuck with people. And people are like, I can't believe this generation does this. And I'm like, my boy was fucking on this shit early. Before anybody could spot him. And if you think making the old lady walk out of target with a pair of air pods, she thinks she just won that haven't been paid for when the alarm's going to go off. It's bad. Yeah. Wait, two. Y'all are like, y'all are fucking babies. I mean, this is this guy started at the top. Yeah. They're, they're fucking, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's unreal, dude. But yeah, I was like, he was, he just couldn't believe. Yeah, when we had the idea, they were like, come to me though, like, they call the economy store, they're like, we wanted to do something. And they had a title, the amazing racists. And then they had their ideas. They had them like, these are cool. Well, that's a pretty light. And they're like, well, it's about as much as we give, like, no, let's fuck go for it. Yeah, not to run like, let's sell like dog to like Chinese restaurants. No, it's over. It's over. Yeah. No, I have thought about it. The result is it's over. It's buried. It's buried next to a hero. Yeah. It's, it's, I, I'm so glad that you asked about that because it's just, I thought it'd be from stand-up or something. I love it because I got so much trouble for that. And people are always like, when they just like, you regret it. I'm like, no, there are new 14 year old boys having a great day because of some of my shit fucking night years ago. And they're still, you can still find them. Yeah, they'll just just get ripped. And then a YouTube eventually like, no way. Take that down. Someone else to put it up. Yeah. Millions of views. They're always like, no way. Read it. Yeah. Nice. Read it is the Wild West. Yeah. Not for the thin skinned. No. If you're Google yourself, I'm ready to find out your physical flaws. No, but some people have sent me some screenshots about some stuff about me on reddit. And I'm just like, do you know what I know? It's what's very, very true, but also kind of fucked up. I love it. I'm like, I love that they're talking shit. And it's about me. Like they are spending their time on this planet just ripping me fucking down the internet. And I'm like, this is pretty fucking dope. Yeah. I'm like, you really didn't make it, dude. You imagine like, I don't love gildin shirts. You know, when you buy like GILDN. Yeah. They're like, rough. They don't fit that great. But I mean, I would never think of weighing in on a message board about how much you hate them. I mean, the best man scout goes thing about like how people leave like real reviews on restaurants. Uh-uh. And he's like, the best of rules. When I was fucking growing up, we didn't fucking do it anyway. You fucking salmon sucks, never coming back. Yeah. It's like, it's so funny, but it's so true. Yeah. It's like, I don't want to go there anymore. You have people, it's same like music critics. Like we put a record out and some of it would be like, you know, leave an opinion on it. And you're just like, caronation. Just don't play it. That's what you do for a living. I couldn't even get through this. Yeah. Okay. Unbelievable, dude. Yeah, it'd be nice if it's ever critic like that, like a critique like that. I started going, I was listening to, let's say to positive. I was like, I was listening to whoever see or fail. And I hate it so much that I had to turn on a parker McCallum. Oh, I mean, I really liked it. Yeah. No, this is a really standard. This guy I was always talking about. Yeah. Yeah. This is a really good critic. That'd be nice. Yeah. I'd be like, okay. Yeah, I like that critic. All right, buddy. Thank you. Yeah. Well, I appreciate you. All right, guys. That was the episode. I got to be honest. Probably one of the worst episodes ever done. That's right. It fit into this theme because it was scary bad. What I mean, give me something. Dude, give me something. I don't know. The trip wasn't that good. What'd you do? I don't know. I had a video, but it's not really there. God. The guy makes good music. I got to think it's the publicist. Mine said they told him again that we need like travel stuff and he just did not have anything. So the scary, just so you know, for October, for the month of October, the frightening season. Today was scary bad. What was last week? Somali land, Black people. And then next week, oh, we're real. A lot of gore and blood. And then Ari Maddie. Yeah, I think just Scandinavians in general are frightening. And then November is a travel vlogger's month. It's giving thanks to the travel gods. Because there's not much to be thankful for. It's a gloomy day here in London town. It's time to give up this dream once again. And support a new dream. That's right. The Yankees are out. But the Tottenham hot spurs are now in second and last place courtesy of the Manchester United fucking cheat code. Now why would Saudi's own a fucking football club? That's fucking bullshit. This is what you supported all you comics who did the re-op festival? Is that the Saudi Arabia? I actually don't know. I just heard everybody get mad about it. I was actually, when I heard about it, it was on Neil told me about it when I was in, when he came to visit me in Peru, went to climb Machu Picchu, which will be next weeks, all the weeks after episodes. Today's episode is produced by your mom's house network, edited by Alan Catholic. And he was I tell him about it a little bit and then I was like actually buddy this sounds like gossip I don't want to hear it okay fair so I don't really know anything about it But have her glimmers and I'm just telling you when you guys play the Riyadh comedy thoughts Well if it is Saudi Arabia, I really actually don't know you have supported the man city Crushing of our team. Tana would have had four champions I can't even get into it. I can't even get into it. I'm so mad But don't worry about that because even though we have basically no points We're still gonna be fine Can I tell you the last thing? I'm in Tunisia right now I recorded it before I left. I found one week empty and I haven't had a second country yet So I went to Tunisia. I look for direct flights I just look for direct flights in London and then I narrowed it down. I use AI I say take out all the countries I've already been to I've already got Uruguay as a new country. It will also have been no Argentina this year Brazil France America but I've been to those Uruguay was the only new one Two-year. So if you look for direct flights. I was like narrow that down under a thousand under a thousand dollars round trip Great Nair organized it by a total flight time Taiwan out By the time I got there anyway, they'd be part back part of China Tunisia is it safe? Yes, is it safe for Jews? I don't know. Great. Let's go Yeah, so I'm in Tunisia. I have honestly I've looked nothing up. I asked seal. I asked I asked small-brained American. I asked Charles World Traveler because he's a fucking big Africa guy None of them been there. Seal put me in touch with somebody who's been there once. I just rolled pots hadn't been there I was like all right. Give me a couple things to do Said run to cars like okay. I'll run to car drive around fucking I have no idea but I'm there now. I'll be up back in like uh Let's say Monday when this comes out Probably back Wednesday or Thursday Who the fuck's been to Tunisia? I don't know anything about it. They have some cool. I think Shooks So markets and then like this is hard desert there. I I don't even know what language I speak. I'm doing no research because I'm a bad Traveler Anyway until next week with either Ari Maddie Ryan O'Neill I'm already sure fair saying so long and I really got to start prepping the guests to do a better job when they don't know what the fuck this is Parker You're a great musician dude, but what the fuck? All right, bye