On Our Last Egg

Hello champ. Hey there. Okay. What's wrong? How are you? Nothing I just realized Okay, are you mad at me? I Like regular heads at No, there's like some sort of fight happening right out of my window, and then I also realized Just I have a I have a flight like right after this that I really miss I miss red Okay, what time is the flight the end beyond the flight the flight boards at 5.20 p.m. Okay, we wrap this at Around 320 So I want to wear at what airport? That's such a good question. You stress me out in a way that is there's there's three in New York I know it but the fact that you know, I understand there's three I didn't check in yet either JFK. That's the worst one Yeah, very blessed Very looking very looking forward to it. I can do a lot of bonus by myself. I do not give a fuck man No, I will be here and I will be Brett. I will be a present father So how are you how the hell are you? I want you to start thinking about putting your phone now I I'm just gonna simply check in For the flight like that's all I'm gonna do really quick now what I like is Don't and don't forget to talk right into that microphone and what I like is have I packed at all no You are sick person and you need to start thinking about your life coach wouldn't dream But you know, I did make it to the gym this morning though You should have packed instead. Yeah, we should do we should do a lot of things in America. Yeah, that's true But no, yeah Yeah, like we're Italy what the first thing that I'm gonna do is pack. Come on Okay, did you check in? No, I couldn't finish take a take a big minute to focus on that. Okay, let me just say Okay, yeah, hit us hit us hit us. Come on. I still am fostering the young woman in conference room B AKA Safron aka Safi. I've been calling her recently. She took like a week to warm up and now she is becoming One of the great loves of my life someone's got to adopt her before oh, that's not good before it gets too bad And like I'm not keeping her that's just is what it is But I'd like someone to adopt her before the more I touch I get the Saturn it's gonna be When someone adopts her which I'm is not an option like she is getting adopted Why is it not an option as you I can't do it does I can't do three cats like it feels like a lot it's crazy It feels like a lot So just flagging that she is a perfect creature. She'll take a week or so to warm up. That's fine That's normal who doesn't but she's amazing and would love someone to get her sooner rather than later So that's my announcement. Oh, I don't get it. I don't know. I don't know. Please reach out to friends of Norma on Instagram. Thank you That is just insanely of three animals in your house. No, it feels like a zoo yesterday They love my fart my morning trip to the restroom John Rob was on the toilet tank behind me sucking on toilet paper John was in my pajama shorts Okay, and the young woman was like nuzzling on my leg and it's like I have to I'm peeing Yeah And I'm open to whatever else happens to there's a time and a place So no, I know hey, I like I do not Understand it all Like how do we get here? How do we get out? Well, someone needs to adopt her. I don't know how we got here because this time last year I would have been like I don't want to cat I don't like can I enter can I interest you in three though? I Will do three I will do three Okay, move my flight. I'm gonna be in much better. No way you moved it in that time. Yeah, to when my lovely my lovely assistant just moved it To when to eight thirty instead of six thirty so I got two hours now now that being said I will have to leave during rush hour. So it's gonna be about the same time. Okay, that I'm that I'm leaving my house Okay Well, I'm glad that you won't be at stress No right now. I'm here right now. I'm present. I do want to show you guys you've already seen it because you've been in the stew McGoo over here that was supposed to be finished by the time that my father gets here next week my dad's coming to town It's just not it's not like at the world not not my world that this studio is done, but I do have this lovely piece look at this This is the napkin from my flight attendant Caroline From frame bridge frame from frame bridge. I did this one on my own because I learned enough from ray at ffb Wow Yeah, and wow it's really the exact right size Did we touch on that when you were here? No, I don't think we talked about it. I was looking at it though No, I mean the frame from like when I went into frame bridge. I think so Just like me going in and every single employee looking at me and being like oh yeah We all heard the episode where you talked for ten full minutes about Your new friend that I never that I surprise it too words who I was actually in the physical store It's fine We just like really like nothing can be worse than it if I ever see the young man Again What you want me to hand someone I you have to be more specific the one that you were just with Yeah, to be more specific the one the one I imprinted on Slay slay Gotcha. Yeah, you ever have a toe but you can know it tastes like cardboard. I don't like bubbles Oh my gosh, I'm having the hey, yeah, I think that's part of the reason it does taste like cardboard always not all of it This one specifically tastes like dust Yeah, there's always that like musty tastes. I have to okay, so first of all I went to coffee shop today I remember the coffee shop I told you I go to and the guys really mean to everybody except for you except for me. Yeah We gave nucks today You knocked we not everything saying sounds like a slur today. No, we knocked me in my me in boss man. We know Wow Yeah, I have I been to this coffee shop. Yes, have I met the man Like I think I ordered on our behalf, but you have it. Yeah, you've been in You've been in cahoots with him. Yeah, he didn't see he wasn't I mean yeah He's just not like he wasn't interested in getting to know me that's for sure, but like I didn't think he was like Bad no, everyone talks about how he's like mean mean mean like no suit for you. Wow, but he is And that sounded like I was doing an action, but I wasn't doing an action that was just a good that was from signfield Yeah, and I think that guy's like I'm not gonna make any guesses. He's just from somewhere else. Let's yeah, let's do it. We can move on So anyways, I go there to get my coffee. I'm in high spirits. I get home I need to ask you like it could be a potentially dumb question But I like haven't really had fruit in my house since I've moved here Like if I have fruit It's it's like apples on there in the fridge or it's like Maybe I'll get some berries. Okay. Maybe I'll get some berries Maybe though like that's not even something that I'm seeking out if it have I'm if they come if they come across my desk and they're looking extra Plump plump. What am I thinking? I don't know if they look good. I'm gonna buy. I'm gonna take him home And I'm like okay down a guy with like blueberries in my fridge But I'm not like seeking you know that's not someone I am constantly all the time anyways Or if I go to the farmer's market like I am gonna come home with faith Anyways, so I get some bananas I'm obviously leaving town today. So I get two bananas. I had one banana today. I put the peel and the trash can And I also want to flag and I'm knocking on wood right now. I've never seen a bug in my house Since I've moved in six months not even I Nothing like I haven't seen anything. I get home. I go to the gym this morning. I come home from the gym fruit flies in the kitchen Having a party. They're everywhere. There's six or seven where And it's in and the source The banana peel their their dance floor the banana peel How did they even how did they even hear about it like that? Hey, it was as if they had like flyers around the city saying we're doing like fruit fly look a like contest on the banana peel in Conor's house Like 9 30 a.m. sharp be there be square and they all showed up. I we I think we've spoken about this before I do not know like what summons them so quickly and where they've been lying and wait That's the question where are they lying and wait? Where are they lying? They're lying wait So that like that almost is worse than having fruit flies is knowing that they're dormant And then they're awoken by a peel They're waiting somewhere Is he I don't even want to do I don't even want to give them airtime I don't even want to give them airtime. I don't want them to I don't want them to know that their name is on my lips But I do need to know where they can't like are they waiting or they must they're they're present They're ever present but I'm talking brand new trash bag I'm talking I've the house is clean right now are they in the people? Oh, I think they're waiting in your drain. In my drain. Fruit flies don't spawn from nowhere. They originate from their eggs, which are laid on fermenting our overripe organic matter. You might have had eggs on your apples. Apples are in the fridge, and they were nowhere near the peel. I don't know. I mean, I'm almost anti-fruit right now, because why are they, why are their eggs in my fruit? But anytime you mention eggs, something's eggs, I'm out there. I bet it was on. I bet they, I bet you had an egg in the peel or something. But the good news is the part you eat was protected. No, because there were no flies. And then I opened it, and then there's flies. They were in. I probably can't see them. Oh, my God. I probably can't see them eggs. No, that means the eggs are in, they're in, like by proxy, that means there's eggs in me. Stop. I need to go to somewhere cold and freeze these eggs. I need to freeze my eggs. Yeah. I mean, well, not, not, I wasn't agree with you. We just had that conversation yesterday. I definitely like me to start thinking about that, which is amazing. Yeah. Wait, hang on. If you don't, if you're a young woman, if you're a young woman of a certain age and you're reaching the point where it's time to start considering freezing your eggs, now do you start, you search, you shed eggs, right? Am I wrong about that? Yeah. You shed your, no, you shed your, you're in lining and that's what your period is, but your egg drops when you're ovulating, which is not your period. And you have a, you have a handful of eggs, right? You're born with all the eggs you're ever going to have, but I think it's just one egg that you just freeze one egg. No, I think you freeze several eggs, because you have, you have all your eggs in the back. You drop, how many eggs, typically one egg is released during opulation. This occurs when a mature egg is expelled from the ovary into the philopean tube. However, in rare cases, multiple eggs can be released simultaneously, resulting in multiple pregnancies. So it's like 20. Yeah. Okay. That's, wait, not, not your ovaries expelling an egg. You're expelled. You've been bad. Oh my God. How many eggs are left at 35? Can we click on that 25,000? Okay. That's like a ton of eggs, and they're all in one basket, by the way. In this episode of New Girl, they did this, like, test where the gynecologist, like, tested how fertile, basically, like, Jess and C.C. were at, like, 31 or something. And Jess, like, had, like, the fertility of, like, a 25-year-old or something, and then C.C. was, like, on her last egg. And that is something that I, a test that I don't want to take, but, like, I'm very curious about. That's, yeah, that's, like, that movie with Justin Timberlake and Amanda C. Fred. That's, like, in time, and they get to, that's how they're, that's their currency. I haven't seen that one. Oh, it's a fantastic movie. Never even heard of it at all. Amanda's great. Justin is phenomenal. We were, we were stripped east of this star. If you would have just stayed out of music and his car that night when he was driving home, we would have had such a star. Goodness. It's like, he was such a good actor. Well, I also see an actor. That was so recent, like, that doesn't have anything to do with the decline of his acting career. Well, I ruined the tour. I ruined the freaking tour. This is going to ruin the tour. It did. We stopped saying that too quickly. I know. Well, we can bring it back. Yeah. I do want to flag also. You're born with one to two million eggs. That's crazy. Six pounds, two ounces, yeah, by the way, I have two million eggs and in this little six pound two ounce, baby. I know I've done this before, but right now in my body, if I decide to have a kid, I have my granddaughter's eggs in me. Is that right? Yeah. Because I have my daughter, wait, no, not yet. If I'm pregnant with my daughter, I'll have her all her eggs in me, which will be one of my granddaughter's if she has a child. Right. That is the, like, definition of I was in my mom's stomach. Oh, that's why we're so close. Yeah. She was pregnant with me. Wow. Wow. That's actually really incredible. Speaking of medical marvels, I bleached my teeth last night with like medical grade bleached from the orbit honest, what product like medical grade? I don't know. I don't know why. 30. I just said 35% on it. That's the best I can do. It's fine. And it's the kind of you like, it's a syringe and you squirt in your retainers because I just got like my invisible line attachments removed. So I haven't been able to wipe my teeth in a year. Yeah. Like, crass strips or anything, so I whitened, burned in a way that like I have never in my life. I was crying. I couldn't talk. I called it at 20 minutes. It's supposed to be 35 minutes or 30 minutes and took the bleach off. Gums had been bleached complete and utter gum bleach edge white gums. That could be that could be nice. It wasn't nice. Yeah. Um, thank God this morning they went back to more of like a pink, but I had thought it was permanent last night until I googled and like, I just want everyone to like put yourself in the shoes of a person who thinks they're going to have white gums for the rest of their life for like a minute. Like, that is a horrible minute to be living. Oh, yeah. I wouldn't want to live that. Yeah. So that's a minute that I lived last night. I thought I was going to be Mrs. White gums. That's like one of my dreams. Mrs. Mrs. White gums. That was scary. So just so you guys know, if you do with the medical grade bleach, it's possible that your gums will turn white. Did you put too much of the 35% in? Yeah. Way too much. I just did mine the other night. Mine are just normal strips. I'm doing normal stripage. Yeah. I think I'm just going to do strips. So my procedure, which is not recommended, if any dentist, the entire listening, you will get mad. I basically, my thing is like, okay, need to leave them on for 30 minutes. I'm going to go ahead and do 45. And then on top of that, I'm going to fall asleep with them on because I can't, if I'm doing anything else and I have white strips in, I'm way too aware that I have them in. But if I go to sleep with them, I just wake up to this average to my brain. It usually comes from my front left tooth and it zaps me direct, direct line to my brain. It's like that TikTok where it's like, you know, when they zap you, that's out. Once I had like such a delayed reaction to whitening strips, it was like three days later and my teeth started hurting so bad, I had to cancel plans. I was like, sorry, my teeth hurt. Like, no, yeah. It's a brutal type of pain. I think teeth and your fingers, if you cut your finger, fingers don't heal. They take the longest like hand finger cuts. That's what paper cuts on your fingers hurt so bad. I think finger and tooth pain is two of the worst pains you can have. Tuth pain is thankfully, I've never had like, and toes, and cavity or anything related to that. But I've had whitening strip pain and medical grade bleach pain. The bad part about me bleaching my teeth in my bed when I go to sleep is like, you know your contacts are everywhere. Yes. I have like whitening strips that I'll take out in the middle of the night and just stick into my bed frame. Connor, I do that too. And then I have to like scrape the residual off. No, yeah, it's really bad. When I have people over there like, what is this that stuff on your bed frame? I'm like, oh, that's just all my whitening strips from days of your, to me, it looks like a little party. They actually look like old crusty used condoms to be honest that I've like stuck to my bed frame. Speaking of unmentionables, I have to, I have to get a new cleaning lady. She, I have a bad habit of leaving like stuff out, just like weed pen, other stuff, etc. Like when she's coming. And then like, I'll, I usually am like, not home in the morning that she comes and then I'll come home and I'll be like, hey, and she's like, hey, like I like, I put, I put that away. And I'm like, okay, sorry, sorry, like you don't need to tell me sorry, I left it out. Yeah. But she like always draws attention to it. Like she'll like summing me into my room and then like point to my nightstand. And I'm like, I know, I know what's in there. Thank you though. Like where goes thanks so much for letting me know like it's, it's like you're a little, like we were girls together, we're, you guys have that secret just the two of you. It's like I, it's like fine, everyone has a nightstand drawer, you know, and it's like just stop talking about mine, like get, get my nice hand drawer out of your mouth. I have to go through, you know how my apartment is, you know, yeah. So like I have to go through, like everyone will walk by my bedroom. Yes. So I go through before the cleaning person comes and I clean. See I'm about it like, like forgetting when she's coming or and stuff like that. Yeah, I clean, I do a clean before the clean. Yeah. [BLANK_AUDIO] I just need my floors, because I can't. The amount of dust that's produced in this apartment that has no open windows is just, I'm just like, I'm just so, it really truly, yeah. We looked into, we've looked into dust so many times on this podcast we have never gotten an answer. We must bring dust into our home, right? - Yeah, right. - Brooke, I don't know, okay? Like this is like a, if Hank Green comes on, ever onto this podcast, I'm asking him about dust for 30 minutes. - Here, wait, let me start our running note of what, like we need to talk to Hank about. - Dust is a big one. - Hank. - We had a bunch of evolution questions, right? - Dust. - We have like. - Fruit flies also. - Big tooth, we could ask him about big tooth. - Big tooth. - What was our issue with the ozone layer? Didn't we have like a suggestion that probably- - I was just, I think we were just confused about it's like exact location, like the coordinates. - Yeah, I also don't really, I don't get the hole. - Yeah, hole. - What do you mean there's a hole? - Yeah. - I struggle with the hole as well. - Like it's an old zone. - Bix, the hole. - I guess they are trying, but it's a big like group project effort vibe, like it's like, hey, like stop. What, I don't even know what they want us to do. I forget, I know the straws were a big thing for them for a while. The funny thing about the microplastics in our body, like I know that that's an issue. The thing is I'm kind of eating plastic as I'm always chewing on like the cap of a pen. And I know that I'm swallowing bits and pieces of it. Now the thing about the paper straws, I'm eating several straws a week because they dissolve into my mouth and I'm swallowing and I'm like, oh, I must have gotten, like this drink must be chunky. It's not chunky. I'm eating paper the whole straw. I'm definitely eating at least one straw a week. Like over the course of, so like at what point are we gonna start talking about micropapers in our body in our bloodstream? Who is who gonna start talking about it? They. I think they already are. Micropapers? Wait, micropapers? I know, I already know about the microplastics. Paper's fine. You can eat paper. You can eat paper. Yes. There's chemicals in paper. Ask me what chemicals. Paper's primarily composed of cellulose, which is harmless. Newspaper, print, other types of ink are non-toxic and small amounts as well. However, while paper will not poison your child, it can be choking hazard. I've always been under the impression you can eat paper. Why do you have that, like, why do you have such strong conviction that you can eat paper? I've remember, like, I think there was something in my childhood that must have happened or it came up. Were you eating paper? No, but I'm having like a memory of a paper eater. Yes, I know exactly who it was. There was a guy that ate paper in my school and everyone was like, you've got to stop eating paper. Wow, this had been buried in the archives for a while of my memory. And he was very adamant about the fact that it's fine. Like, he was just trying to be, he was trying to make a statement, and I don't know what the statement was. But he was, it's an example of, like, just because you can, doesn't mean you should, but he wanted to do it to stand out. He was so, he-- What are some other examples of things that you can do, but not necessarily should. Did you just ask me what are some other examples? Some other examples, rebooting a TV show, an old TV show. You can do that, doesn't mean you should. I just started watching the paper, speaking of the paper and rebooting old TV shows. Look at how those came together. Wow, that's an act of God. What is it like? I went to watch it and I realized, I'm not going to sign it for peacock for the fifth time, so-- Oh, I wasn't like paying attention, but it honestly didn't seem as bad as I was thinking at all. Like, I had a few laughs. I will say I'm not connecting with the woman from my lotus. Which one is that? I forget who's in it. That's Edelman. One from P.D. Who is the hotel manager? With the sun. Oh, oh, oh, oh, the Italian. Yeah. OK. Is Gigi in this one? Hadid? No. Can we look up the cast? I know Alex Edelman is in it. The Italian woman-- Oscar. Oscar is in it. The guy whose name no one can say, I feel horrible. Don't know. Don't know. If they had don't have-- I wonder if they had to pay Oscar. You know when you're in like kissing booth 1, 2, 3, they doubled their pay for each movie. I didn't know that. Yeah. I think that's typical. I wonder if they had to pay him even though it's like Oscar, even though it's not technically like the next season. Here's the cast. I thought I knew more people than this. Yes, not. OK, cool. I don't know if I'm going to watch it. You had some laughs, though. I had one, I think. Yeah, I had one. I remember it like it was yesterday. But you really like the office. I love the office. I love the-- I love sitcoms. I've been rewatching friends. I'm sorry. That show's freaking amazing. And I don't care. That's OK. That's your right. Say that. And I realized when I was watching, if I had hinge, which I don't, as I was, band, is one of the prompts like my biggest red flag or something, mine would be like I like Stan Ross. Like Ross is my favorite friend's character. I know. And people really feel strongly against that. And there's nothing I can do to change my mind. No, I know. No, I know. You've been outspoken Ross head for a while. I'm a freaking Ross head. I know. That's OK. That is OK. OK. I mean, the delivery there is just something that tickles me in an amazing way. The more I do auditions for shows, and then the more I watch sitcoms, and I'm always embarrassed about my delivery for lines. And then I go back and watch. And I'm like, oh my god, it's supposed to be like that. Like what? Like acting? Just like over-the-top exaggerated for sitcoms, you know? Sometimes. Yeah. I think all the time. I think sometimes. OK. I think in the ones with like a studio laugh. I don't know. Yeah. Because that's more of like a performance. Yeah. I don't know. I'd have to find some example. Obviously, like not the office is not like an over-the-top. Like that's like actual good acting. But yeah, I think like friends and stuff is very kitschy. I love friends. Kitchy's OK. Yeah. Kitchy can be good. You like the theater. It is a little bit over-the-top. That's what I was saying. OK. I can see that. OK. Speaking of paper. Before like we started. The transitions are so fire today. No. The transitions are so fire. And this is speaking of fire. This fired me up. I am going to send you a screenshot right now. And I want you to just I want you to just kind of look at this and take this in. Basically last night. I was online and I really needed sticky notes. So I got an Amazon. I went to get some sticky notes. And I was like, but I kind of don't want bright pink, bright yellow, neon orange in my house. So I typed in cool colors sticky notes. Yeah, I see that. You guys, they came back with gray, like light mint salmon beige. It is the most depressing collection of colors that you could possibly ever. It's like sticky notes for jail. It does. I was going to say it looks like colors that would be like in a psych ward. Yeah, it is. So it was the most visorally draining depressing photo that I've ever seen. And it was a thumbnail image to try to sell these cool color sticky notes. Oh my God. I I almost started crying. You know, I was like, like, what are these? You can go to hell, you know? And then I started thinking about it. I was like, if someone if you had. I go to your house and you have your grocery list written on a beige sticky note. I'm stealing something from your house. You know, that's not right. Like if you have a really important announcement or a really important thing. Brooke, you have last data freezer eggs. And it's written on a dope sticky note. You're missing that appointment. I kind of think that like if you had each pad separately. They wouldn't be as offensive. It's all of those muted colors together. That's offensive. I don't know, man. I it was it was so depressing to me. I've never seen anything like that. And then I went back to sticky notes. Yeah, I ordered the bright pink bright yellow bright blue bright green sticky notes. I think that was the right choice. I'm done stripping my life of these things. I also need them to stand out and be annoying because that's how you remember to look at them. Very true. You know, I want to like I'm walking around my kitchen. What is this? This is hot pink thing. Mmm. Yes. Email back my accountant for your taxes. That's an important. Yeah. I think that that's a great lesson that you learned. Yeah, like bring back that that is like childhood to me like those bright pink things. And then I almost evolved into someone that paints their kitchen white, you know, scary. Life comes out. You really fast. Yeah. Well, I'm glad that happened to you. Oh, sorry. That was just an experience I had last night. Did I have a little bit of an edible? Yeah. When I saw that, it scared me that image of those sticky notes scared me. Wow. I like it. Who knew that someone could be so impacted by? Yeah. And Brooke. was more moved to tears by that collection of sticky note colors than when I watch Manchester by the sea this week. Are you serious? Manchester by the sea is like a horrible, like in terms of like tragedy. I'm not discrediting the tragedy that happens during Manchester by the sea, but I was expecting at least a buildup. The whole movie's just like, my family died. My brother died. I have no family. I'm depressed. My job sucks. I have no friends. I'm an alcoholic, but there was no, I'm like, okay, like this is just like, didn't you have like a nephew or something? Yeah, yeah, the nephew. That was it was at a bright spot or no? It was a bright, they kept, they keep, sorry, if you were like, if this was on your list, you had like 20 years to watch it. Sorry. I'm not spoiling it for you. You could have done your due diligence, but I, it was beautifully shot. The movie was beautifully shot. I think for me, and I like this is probably in terms of like filmography and what is it called when you love film, film files, send a file, like they're probably screaming at their phone right now or at the screen. I think it was shot beautifully. I could have used some sort of breakthrough along the way. Casey Affleck is such a good actor. I needed him to give me a little bit more baby. Come on. Like, give me, give me some, some emotion. Obviously, he's completely stripped of emotion because he did, like, lose his whole family, et cetera. He was just like on fire by accident on accident. Yeah, because he was like drunk and like, oh, bad. Yeah, no, it's, it's devastating, but there was like no depth to the character. They didn't lend us anything and do not come into my DMs. I have moved on several times. I'm just saying I've seen TikToks of, oh, here's my new TikTok thing that makes me cry every single time I see it. Have you seen, have you gotten any of these TikToks that are like parents texting their kids after they've moved out of the house and they've dropped them at college and they go, this person's like, oh, I'm already home sick. It's my first week of college. They slot you slide it to a screenshot. The dad said, I called you down for dinner tonight. LOL. No, I have not seen those. And it's like they're at college and the house is empty. I have not seen those. It's heartbreaking. Another one, like a mom saw, like a billboard of a new movie that was coming out. She was excited to come home to tell her daughter that they should go see it. And she was like, but you weren't here. Are like another one was like, I made you, I made two lunches today. Like on my, when before you woke up, but I realized like you're not in the house. Wow. I've really had the opposite experience with my parents begging to go home, like threatening to throw myself in front of the tea. And my parents being like, you will say and you will like it. I mean, I had this year's experience. I was like, I'm not smart. I'd like need to drop out. And they're like, no, I don't think that that's an option now. So you can enjoy your time there. No, but they're saying like they want to go home, too. But they were like, it was sad. Oh, yeah. My parents just weren't feeling like the sentimental that it seems that those parents are. Yeah. I need to go back in my email. I had written my parents like a long email why I should be able to come home because I was a threat to myself and others I said. That's really crazy, bro, having writing. I had to, I had to. That's what threat to myself and others is supposed to be what does it? That's supposed to be what gets you sent home from places. No, you have to add and you have to add and others is the important part. And others seem important part. Didn't I respond to my email? Wow, interesting. Yeah. I don't think you're a threat to many people outside of yourself. I could have been. I don't know, bro. No, I was, I, oh my god, that was like the worst two weeks of my life was the first two weeks of college. Who? Oh my god, I'm going back to Boston for the first time since college. Oh, yeah, you sent me that. What is that? For a wedding. Oh, yeah, I'm like spooked. Well, the air I think will make me really nauseous. You know how morning air is like so nauseating? I don't have that experience. Oh, when I like leave the house and it's like dawn, I get so nauseous. Something about the air makes me very, very sick. That's the same thing with Boston air makes me very, very sick. Like fresh, clean, crisp, Boston air, like morning air and Boston air. Like I don't, I, this is something that truly, I will not see eye to eye with you. Whoa, I thought morning air made everyone sick. No, no, people love morning air. No, people get really sick from the morning air. Have you talked to one other person who gets sick from morning air? I am like, before, excuse me. Is he sick from morning air? No, I love morning air. No, I feel like before like seven. It's lovely. It's a great thing. There is no, it's like an allergy that I have. No. Like every time. What was he, was there something that you hated going to and you had to wake, what school? I'm honestly wondering, I must have Pavlov dog myself. You Pavlov dog yourself in a big way. But I don't, I never really swim practice was after school. I didn't have that early morning swim practice thing. I don't know. I guess whenever I had to get up early, like what good was that ever? What good is getting up early, ever done to anyone? Right. So I don't know. I just thought it was a thing with morning air. That's really funny. I want you to go and ask people if anyone else has that experience that isn't directly related to something. That's why I don't, I'd never take morning flights, like early morning flights. Like I'll always do try to do after nine because I don't want to leave my house before seven because I'll get sick. That's yeah. Wow. Because I'll get sick. Well, I'll get very nauseous from from the air. From the air. From the air. So no, I don't have that. What, why did we, oh, because Boston air, that's going to be great. I love Boston. Also, I have a show in Boston Halloween weekend. If anyone, I think it already sold out. I think there's five shows and they also sold out five Boston shows. Let me double check. That's a great place to be on Halloween, though. Like weather wise. I know. I'm really, really excited. I kind of have a trouble hearing you today. Is my mic? Oh, you need to like speak, like put your lips on it. I moved it a little bit. So, oh, crap. Has that been an issue the entire time? I don't know. I like kind of I'm having a hard time, but maybe it's just me, but yeah, like put your lips on it, basically. I put my lips on it. Okay. My lips are on it. I have one thing I'd like to say. Yeah, what, what, what, what, what, what, what? Yeah. I was just something. I, I'm living in a hellscape right now that is kind of like an episode of black mirror meets modern, modern love. It's so I need a hinged jar. Like every time I say hinge, I need to put a dollar in it. But obviously, you know, had a crash out in terms of deleting that app and re-dowling it 80 times got banned. Well, the most embarrassing thing to me about hinge was having to send a like. And I think I probably sent like 20 likes total. And I remember every single guy I sent a like to because it was like so it was like a such a big thing for me. And like I was so like mortified to be doing it. And so I remember all the guys that didn't match me back. I would say probably 15 of the 20. Okay. I am getting. I'm not kidding. Probably 10 of them are now on my FIP. Who knew? I guess it's because I'm in LA. There, everyone's trying to be a content creator. They're all making videos about hinge. Oh, they are having no luck. Cannot find anyone on the app. Like, well, you're probably no longer there. There's no one good in their likes. They go through all their likes. I am like, this is literally my, I deserve this because of how hard I went off. And it is so I'm living in a housecape. Like, I can't scroll without seeing one of these men that left swiped me being like, everyone in my likes is as deformed over basically. You, your profile is no longer active. So there'd be no way for them to know. But at one point, I was in their likes. And I remember them not liking me. But also like now, like I obviously dodged a bullet because do I think that women can go online and make videos about the plight of dating and dating apps? 607 percent. Do I think that it's a little bit icky when men do it? 710 percent. I do. I think there's a difference. And so I'm glad that I was able to dodge these men. That being said, hurts my feelings in a major way. That's real. Um, I think we've talked about the fact that anything of that elk, like any, anytime a guy is talking about what? So I guess like, I guess like girls don't like a God hardworking passion. it guy that'll eat their pussy anymore. I guess whatever. Yeah, but that's what they're essentially saying. I guess girls don't like a guy with a solid job that will rub their back anymore. That is what they talk about. And then that does really well. So I'm sure they're content farming their experience more so than actually telling the truth. Every guy on LA hinge must be is a content farmer. Yes. I mean, it's easy. It's such low hanging fruit. You can't take that personally at all. They're honestly. They're just honestly. I'm actually starting to take it more personally. And here's why. Go on. I mean, honestly, if they're straight guys, they probably don't know who I am because we don't have a large straight male fan base. But like if they did and their content farmers, like they shouldn't want to like use me for cloud, like the one guy that asked to come on the podcast. Yeah. And it's like, wow, you think I'm ugly enough to not cloud chase me. That's hot. Is that making sense? No, I didn't track it because I love all these men that didn't like me or cloud farmers. Okay. But they're not going to cloud farm me. You would think that would be like a layup. Do you want a guy to cloud from me? I do not at all. I'm just saying maybe that should even hurt my feelings more because you'd think that that like these guys would be anxious to cloud farm. But they're like, he heard. Is it making sense to you? Yeah. The second time. Can you can you explain it to me in different terminology? So she's saying all these guys are using hinge to post TikToks. But then when they see Brooke, if they know she's a content creator, they're not using her as cloud. Like they should want to use me. But you said that we probably they're probably not falling. They're we're not probably landing on their FYP. Yeah, but I'm saying if we were like out of the fifth, like out of the 15 of them that said no, two of them are probably two to three that have that are cloud farmers have probably well, it's it's not certainly not good business. If they were, yeah, even if they were on there to date and everyone that sees them online and then sees them on the profile knows that they're on there. Oh, I also can't stress enough. These boys don't have followers. Okay. They've got like 106 followers. We need to stop allowing apps to track other apps. You know what I'm talking about when you. I somehow pinch and TikTok are incahoots to make me miserable. Here are all these cloud farmers that hate you and think you're an ugly troll. Thank you for letting me know. Thank you. And like I need to send you this shit they're saying is insane. Give me one. It's just like about their likes about how like they they like no one even like remotely salvageable just like I'm going to hurt myself. Like that being my worst nightmare in the first place sending a like and now having to see all these men that I send a like to be like damn my likes. It's a movie. You did the exact same thing. I know I'm getting my come up ends come up ends. But it is line and wait. Just just knowing that there's 11 fruit flies in my in my the kitchen like just line dancing. Just line dancing in there. Wait, we asked people to send us questions. Yeah. Let me see. Let me make sure we don't we didn't miss anything. Emmys. I don't care. I have this one funny thing that happened but it's really not necessary to share. Do you want to share it but it's really what happened to me. It's funny to me. It's funny. I don't know if you'll think it's funny and I just I'm nervous about sharing it but basically I went to college with this guy Cameron Decker who's a he's a kicker for the Chargers now. Very successful young man. Damn, we're we're funny. We're more friends now than we were in college but I went on Twitter and I came across this thing. I was like, oh, I know him. What is this graphic? What is it? It's just a picture of him and it says Chinese in all caps and it's just a huge thing and there's an alert. It says news. L.A. Chargers kicker Cameron Decker is Chinese. Is he? Decker is the first NFL player to be born in Hong Kong, China. They've been sharing high for the first 11 years of his life. Today he became the most accurate kicker ever but I just like that's the most insane graphic I've ever seen. Okay, that's a white man too. Yeah, but they're calling him Chinese because he was born in China. Brooke, could you imagine they have a picture of you on there and it says Jew in all caps across. It does look like a wanted poster in clip art letters Jewish like you'd be like, okay, we are, we need to find this girl. That's funny than this because this is a white man. Is he at all Chinese? It really does just say he's born in Hong Kong, China. Imagine putting a picture of like American Chinese. It's like really crazy to me. Yeah, I can't understand that. No, I asked it. Sorry, we can that's kind of the end of that. But I did not watch the Emmys. Was there anything to note? I was watching Manchester by the sea. Gory. I don't think so. White Lotus like when anything. Huh? White Lotus didn't win like anything. I think that this is the one where it's it's all voted on by that, I guess, Grammys is the academy, but I don't know who Emmys who vote. Well, they like usually win, but it was all the studio. Oh, the studio was great. Yeah. Well, okay. It wasn't there something else that happened on TV and I didn't watch either. No, nothing. Okay, let's do. Let's do the questions. We had people write instructions. Did you have any like really notable ones? I do want to just like really quickly touch on a couple that people asked one. I don't know what to name your baby. I don't know anything about you. I don't know anything about your family. I don't think Birken, I can help you name your baby. Two, Postgrad is supposed to be depressing at first. You get over it. It's depressing. Then you start having fun. The year paycheck. You have one depressing here. Everyone has it. It will end. Hopefully, knock on wood. Three, break up with them. That's just a general blanket statement. Four, there was one more. How do you make friends? I don't. You have to, I don't know. You join, you have to join something. Maybe join something really niche that you're interested in doing. There will be other people that are by themselves. Or coming to one of my shows and getting the Broken Connor Facebook group. There's a lot of people that come solo. That is absolutely welcome and okay. And I'll see you there. And I think that's really it. Otherwise, I'm worried about everyone. Just in general, like everyone asking for advice, I'm I'm I'm concerned about a lot of people and I wish you the best. Okay. Whoa, I wasn't having any of those experiences with the questions. The advice segment was there. There was a lot of. Oh, you were doing the advice. Yeah. Okay. Mine's just like, would you go on dancing with the stars? Do you ask me that? I did. Didn't I? Yeah. I mean, okay, one, that's what that's what I was going to talk about. I knew there was something else that happened on TV that we didn't talk about. I watched dancing with the stars for the first time in my whole life. And it was great because obviously Dylan shook some serious ass. He was fabulous. He was really great. Seeing him cha cha like I just never I never thought I would see him cha cha in that way. It's sweet because like he's kind of like not shy but like more soft spoken, I guess. Yeah. And so seeing him shake ass to milkshake was so amazing. That was awesome. I also have to like Alex was awesome too. That was such a phenomenal performance. It's crazy to see people that were friends with up there like really, really giving it a theatrical performance. Like it's like so insane. I think you could do that. You're a good dancer. You asked me that and I really like I really think maybe not technique wise or skill wise at all. But I would put my whole like body. I would really give it my all. Yeah. So you asked me that the other day. Dancing with the stars is not something that I have ever thought I would be interested in. Now I would like seeing people that I have let me like hang out with. Do this thing. I'm like they're so good at it. Like I want I kind of want to do it now. Obviously you have to be at a certain level in your career to be even invited on. But I'll get there. You will. I didn't want to be there now. But yeah, that was really cool to watch. I threw some votes. And I can't I can't wait to watch this go down. I'm going to I'm going to tune in to this. I wouldn't like truly like you could give me off for me a million dollars. I wouldn't do it. Really. Yeah. You'd be you'd be like graded at two because you're so small like you could really do all of those like I cannot move my body. You'd be a great partner to have because you could be like rolling around. I'll get seasick on impact. That could be part of it. You could be like you guys could do like a you guys could well you could take some show for an and some drama mean. There's just no way in hell. I can't dance. I hate being in front of people. Like, it literally would be a disaster. - No. - I hate my thighs and everyone has those little skirts that are always just like flying right up. Oh my God, I'd shoot myself. - Andy Richter didn't have a little skirt on. - Well, that's Andy Richter, so. - I have to say something that just like I needed to head. I'm sorry. - Okay, okay. - Sometimes it's like not fair to put like an Andy Richter in a situation like that. - He signed up for it. - I know, but it made me really sad. Like, he's obviously a little bit stiff. - But like, what an underdog story that will be? - Yeah, I hope, I hope. It's just like, it's sad for me to subject him to a grading system that's not a fair, like standardized format. - When they-- - Because can you, they're not, they're not at, it's not a level playing field by any means. That's what I'm talking about. - When they give the scores, are they judging based off of, okay, I'm judging this as a first dance, or based off of just like a dance in general. - There's definitely like a skill level involved and there's like gonna be people who are most improved, but not necessarily the best dancer, you know what I mean? But I wish they would do like a golden dance for it. - Oh, it wasn't my question. - That's what I, that's what I'm saying. What did you ask? - I said, when they judged last night, are they judging it based off of like, the awareness that this is their first dance or just like in general, the like skill level? - Well, that's why there was no eliminations last night, or else like obviously-- - Yeah, they're taking into account that it's a first dance when they're scoring. - It would have been like, yeah, like it would have been very obvious who had out there. Now they'll have time to like take feedback and notes, and then the second dance, I think two people go home. - Damn, okay. - But yeah, I think first dance, I just wish they would do like a golden bachelor at type thing with like an older crowd. That dance is I think that would be really entertaining to have a level level level. - You want to put Andy in an older show? - Yeah. - You should tell him. (laughs) - Yeah, I also think who was the actor that was in the Goonies and stuff? What was his name? - Cory Feldman. - Cory Feldman. - He was really good. And he was like an older, he's like an older gentleman. - See him. - Oh my God, wait, what was his name in the Goonies? - Glasses. - No, he wasn't glasses. - No, he was wearing glasses, yeah. - Sloth, he was the sloth? - No, he wasn't sloth. - Oh, mouth, mouth. - Oh right, I knew it was like a one. - Wait, when I get really high, I do feel like I look like sloth from the Goonies. (laughs) - Like in an amazing way. - I feel sorry for Sloth, like. - Who's the actor that played Sloth? - Who played Sloth? They should have him on dance here with the stars. - John. - Let's see what John looks like. - Sloth would completely throw his dance partner into the crowd and scream. - Oh. - Is he no longer with us? These pictures are kind of giving me the energy that he has no longer with us. - He's no longer with us. - In 1989. - We lost him in 1989. - Bang on. He rest. He did a phenomenal job as Sloth. - He really did. - Okay. - I have an advice one. - Okay, let me hear it. - My roommate hums out loud when we watch shows together and it's genuinely affecting me. Hums out loud when we watch shows together. - I guess I would start by just commenting that they do it and hope that they take that and develop an awareness and an understanding. - I had a roommate in college who every time he would eat, he would hum. And he would hum and he would go, and it was no specific song. It was just like a guttural joy that he had when he was eating and it bugged me so bad 'cause I'd be at home working on my laptop or something doing homework, whatever studying. And he would come home pour a bowl of cereal, start humming. And it bugged me to my core. I never said anything about it and then I took like an animal studies class and I learned that gorillas, when they eat, they're so overjoyed that they have a meal, that they hum. - And it was actually like a base level instinct that he had that he was just overjoyed to be eating and it switched the perspective for me that I was like actually kind of like happy that he was, like he had found nourishment for his body and was like celebrating internally. - That's making my heart sore for some reason. - I know. - And the fact that he has cereals of snack and is making my heart sore. What's this? - Yeah, it was, it was, yeah, it's really sweet. For you because you're watching TV, I would break your lease. - Okay. - But he married my friend. I made, I, I was born and I'm a minister. - That's so sweet. - He married my, one of my best friends from growing up. - That's really sweet. - And we were roommates. - And you were roommates. - Yeah, that's a sweet love story. They were like secretly dating here. - Yeah, I love that. - Maybe one of them, right around calm. They wouldn't tell anyone we had a separate group. They don't know this. Never said this one. If we had a separate group, they'd be like, they just leave the party together. Like do you see either of them here? And like we were like, we would like pay attention to their commings and going. - Why did they feel the need to hide it? - No idea. I think they thought that we would all be upset. - Interesting. - Yeah. I don't know, humming during TV that's very something much my dad would do. And if I said anything like he, I know that my dad would be like, oh, everyone has something to say. Everything's so critical. And I'm like, you're humming during a TV program, you know? - I would be like, sure like humming, don't you? - Oh, see, that's passive-aggressive. - Oh, I would just like point it out and hope they get the hint. It's just saying stop humming better, please. - Can you stop humming? Yeah, but being like, are you seriously, see like, I would, I would be like, are you seriously humming during the TV show? Like I, and then they'd be like, oh, like is it? Hopefully they'd be like, oh, you can hear that. Like maybe it's something that they're hopefully not aware of. If they come back to you and they're like, yeah, I'm humming bitch, what about it? Then it's time to head out, you know? I'm gonna get a TV in your room. - I wanna TV. - And then that would upset me 'cause it's like, well, why do I have to leave? If they're gonna hum so much, they should be in their room watching TV, humming to themselves, humming themselves to sleep. I don't know, I don't have an answer. - I mean, I really would just be like, you like humming, don't you? - Maybe I am passive aggressive. - That's okay. I have another one. - Fine to be. - How do I tell my parents, I'm dating someone who's my step-dad's age. He's 35, that's that is 38. And I should try to this young woman's profile and she looks, she's definitely in 20s. She looks like young 20s. - I would do. - I feel like that's so normal to be date. He's 35. - Yes. - I don't need to be stressed about that. I'm trying to think of like your, so is your mom dating a younger man or dad? Is one of your parents with a younger man, married to a younger man? I guess. - Context. - Because I don't think your parent could be that age. - I think it depends on what the 35 year old looks like. If he looks like he's 35, I don't like that. - Well, 35 looks so different on different people. - Case by case. - 35 looks 25 on some people on 45 to 60 on others. - I think if it's something that's going to come up, like let's nip it in the bud, I would try to get ahead of it, even if nothing, no one's thinking about it. If it's a 25 looking 35, it doesn't ever need to come up. And if someone's like, how old, how old is that? - Right, it gets to a point where it's like, you don't even need to mention their age. - Like it's the unmention of age. - It's the unmentionables in your nightstand. - It is so weird that you get when you do, like when I have do my laundry across the street, like they're folding out my undies. - Yeah, it is weird. - Some person is touching my undure. - It is personal. - Okay, well anyways, I'm gonna put my skims on. - I also just want to say, we have a big episode next week. - Yeah, you guys are gonna want to tune in. - Let me just say huge episode next week. - You go with celebrations and announcements. - That's what I'll say. - You think, yeah, and I'll double down. You think that you, anything you think you know about huge episodes, leave that at the dough. - Let me just say it's huge and Connor. I don't think you even know how huge it is. - I know, I've seen huge, or I'll see huge again next week. I think if you think you know what you're talking about, clop it out of your brain. All you need to know for next week, find dining and breathing. - Well said. - Come in with an open mind, open heart, fat ass, and sit that very fat ass down. And we'll see you there. - And I will see you then. - Bye everybody. - Bye.