140: Normalize Diarrhea with Ari Shaffir | Soder Podcast | EP 137

July 16th through the 18th, I'm going to be at New York Comedy Club in Stamford and then Montreal just for laughs, I'm going to be there July 25th at Club Soda. Doing an hour, so it's going to be, you know, mostly the Netflix hour. If you didn't hear it, I didn't go to Montreal on the tour, plus some new jokes. But then after that, it's all me working on new stuff. So I will see you in Albany, July 31st and first at the Albany Funny Bone. Just go to Dancer.com. What am I doing? After Albany, go to Dancer.com. It's all there. We all put it up. Put them on the road, working on a new hour. So come check it out. I hope you like it. There's going to be some real humbingers on there. There's going to be some real shitty ones too. So just come see it. Come watch it get birthed. Watch me push them out on the road. But thank you for watching the podcast. Now we can hit record and get the real shit talk and go and take serenity. I was like, hey buddy, I'm like, in the afterwards, you know, I felt like a fool. I'm like, I should have said, like, hey, we've never officially met. I'm worried. I like the way you stood up for Chapelle. Thanks for whatever. But nice to meet you. What was the pretending? This is a question that obviously I can't ask Lewis because he'll just go live with some skanks. Oh my god. Him dancing when the rock came out. Everyone had a good time. Everyone, how were you drunk? We were having a good time. Yeah, that's awesome. Was that was it? So when Shane made the joke about why'd you put the rich people up for it? Yeah. All the animals are on the side and you heard the crowd going up. Good idea to get them involved. It was great. Yeah. Did you feel like the rich people were fucking shit up? Could you feel that in the jokes? It was early on and was right away. It was right away. It was an opening monologue. We were walking in and who was on stage. Oh, fucking. So you came in late? No, no, no. There was a warm up back to look. Everybody go in. Oh, really? Yeah. And they put Alonzo Bowden. Alonzo Bowden on stage. I saw us and people were walking in talking. He's yapping. He was saying stuff about George Wallace. And he was just George, George, George, I'm talking to you. And he's like, I don't even know. I had to go over like George. Like that. Like no one's paying attention. It was like and this is in the pit right in front of the day. It was a check drop spot to warm up. It was so dumb. Just have a band going and then lower the house lights once everybody's in and over ready to start. It was it was him. It was they set him up. The only other one I saw was before the strokes. They put seating in a dark on a shitty mic and said go before the strokes. Yeah, in between bands. It was so I was so rough. Yeah. That is a, that is a gig. I was really wondering because I thought when you saw the countdown on Netflix, it was going to go to like a red carpet and like someone was hosting and hey, the events about to start. And now we're going to go in live to the, but they were just like, here's Shane Gillis. And then he just came out and did the job. There's so much that me as a producer would do different on every. Oh, my God. I never won on any shooting. I look at where the cameras are. I just start. I don't get a really good point. Because I immediately was like, did you go? You didn't go. No, I was out of there as fast as I thought. It's big J wasn't on it. Then I don't know if I, I don't know if I would have gone. Yeah, dude. And by the way, big J fucking murdered. I think he murdered. He loved, I loved, he was, he was big J. It's what I told him. Yeah. I was only nervous that the crowd would would not would be upset about how ugly he is, but they seemed to not care. They seem that Shane said that he looked like he did look like he ran a Reno strip club like the red in the hair. But when he, um, where he wasn't a lineup, I stopped being worried when I started, it wasn't. No, we got it together because they sent me the lineup. We're like, where am I? Oh, dude. And also you're following an on comic. Yeah. That was perfect. I think everyone followed an on comic. Yeah. And that was, that was the note I would say that was a good note. But something that I said that Katie had a good point on when I was like, haven't they learned from Comedy Central to edit these? So it's just like an hour of killer shit. And then Katie was like, I guarantee with all the famous people they get, they can't do a tape to because everyone the next day would be butt hurt and be like, Hey, you can't do that joke about me. Hey, you can't do that joke about me. Like it would get heavily heavily edited. Well, they'd have to go already cut jokes now if they watch it. Oh, they did that one. I was going to say that you should have the live version. And then, and then I'd better version later. Yeah. I mean, my heart went on two and a half hours into the show. He should be on an hour 40. Exactly. And also the rock did like 30 when he should find out the rocks of black comic. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, he's sure. Yeah. He was, he was dabbing himself. He's like, ladies, look at lovely here tonight. He had with that. He had with the ladies, look lovely here. Do you see anybody at the roast that didn't want to see you? Like, did you see any like famous people that you're like, you know, fucking like great question interview, Dan. Yeah. Interview or Dan has a great question. I do. I do. I think that's a great question. There's one I thought I saw on the way out that I realized like, oh, shit, I didn't, I didn't vet who was at my table. It could have been anybody that won that we, we both were in the green room a long time ago. Yeah. I'm like, oh, yeah. And I think I saw back and I was like, oh, my god, thank god. I didn't have to sit at a table. Yeah. Did you, did you do my table rules? Who is your table? Me and Lewis. Great. By the way, Lewis would go up sat Lewis was for getting guests of Ariesha Fier because I told them his name so much. And I was like, just see that. He was, he was so mad. He was waiting for the J too. Final Lewis. He was waiting for that. It goes, it's J. They put the J and they're like, well, this doesn't matter. It goes put it anywhere then. Is it? No, this is just for the cameras. No, they're shooting. So put it in. Yeah. So put it the J because it was, I know it's me, Doggie. Sat down. Papa was there with his wife. Great. We've met his wife too. Love Tom Papa. God, that guy rules. He's the best. Didn't bring bread. That sucks. But what did he judge the bread they gave you? Did they give you food there? So I asked before because I'm like, I'm going to get lit. So we had to take these pictures of red carpet. So uncomfortable. It's great. Lewis grabbed in your dick. What a skank's picture. I saw it. I loved it. I absolutely loved it. It's everybody. It was also so funny that they were like, we come in, but it's like one, two, three, four, the Stephanie Chelsea is over there. So they go, Oh, no. And they're going a long lens. I'm like, no, no, guys, I'm here. It's supposed to take my picture now. Like, yeah, we're going to long lens this winter. Damn. Yeah. So they skip you for like a far away. And they go, for far away, Chelsea handler. Yeah. We'll take one shot. Yeah. But yeah, you got the dick. I mean, Lewis got the dick grab. And did you take the gloves off? We held them on. You held them on. You both had them on. And then Derosa came and goes, I can't go alone. I couldn't either. Yeah. So I understand. I'll go with you. I took those off because it was just a Rosa. Okay. How about he was a temporary candidate for who he was until you served him with Shane, who will betray the betrayed when Shane moved in all under my funding. Yeah. There were people there. And then Eric Andre was there. Oh, I saw him at your table. He ruled. Yeah. That was a fun. I bet that was a fun. Yeah. I've been, I've seen him like a couple times in the last week. And it was like, oh, yeah, I forgot that guy's just a comic. Some of these guys are going to become massive stars. And then change slightly. Well, Eric is like, oh, yeah, you're the same dude as JFL when we were both trying to get on stuff. What would I learn from him doing this podcast? He's like literally punk rock. He is. He's like punk rock. He's very punk rock. Like he wants to fucking burn it down at all time. Every time. It's great. That was a show. Yeah. When he was on here, he wanted to burn it down. And then we were like, dude, dude, and then if you're also stopped. Yeah. I was just kind of like, there was a moment where I was like, man, he'd fucking chill out. And then he was like, ah, like he completely went like, ah, like you like, like you got it once you get him. So that's a fun. So Derosa, Eric Andre. Derosa was there. I just saw him before. And he goes, I can't do this red carpet thing alone. Please because we're so on. You're you'd be the same way. I hate it. This is not required to do billions red carpets. Everyone else knows how to hold their arms and they go like this. I just went through and went, that's why if you see my red carpet picture from I think it's season two or three of billions, I go like this. That was going to smile like that. That's where Lewis comes in handy. Oh, you love to give a fuck at all. So that he's straight dick grab. Yeah. And they're like, Lewis will be like this. He'll pro wrestle the red carpet. It's great spit water and be like, what are you guys going to do? He's a theater kid. He doesn't see any moments. He just goes, I'm doing my thing always. Yeah. He's a tornado. If he comes in and fucking crashes your shit, you were dancing to the roots. No, our table was having a blast. Did you see tables that weren't? I'll tell you, there was Mo and an earthquake. Sure. Like up and right there. Sure. And earthquake was standing up, going forward every time. Earthquake is having a good time. So as Mo because earthquake also earthquake is in the audience more than that. When you have a crowd, if you have three fat black ladies in front, having a good time, everyone's having a good time. And earthquake did that to that bottom section. Great. He's the man. He was having a fun time blast. Also, yo, that was a great one. And I was like, I guess we'll stand up. And also at rock shows, the white ladies that dance. Yeah, because they get other people to go like, oh, we're all dancing. This is moving. You need people moving and grooving in the front section. Yeah. But it felt like there were a lot of exactly when Shane said that when he was like, oh, he's fucking rich people up. It's, it's, it, it is. It's like, yeah. So I heard something that Billy Joel did when he was on tour with the gay. I heard this story. Yeah. Where he was like, no, no, no, go get the, so they, they don't sell the first two rows. Yeah. And they're like, we need the first two rows to be lively. Sure. So go get the back row. Choose people. Bring them up. Yes. And then now it's like, well, I'm, I was already gonna have a good time. Could you imagine if they would have done that with this roast? That's what I said. Decade you like to done that. Why don't they have four rows, right? Of just seats. No, for the cameras ahead of the camera. So they can't even see him, just seats. - Yeah, just like almost like a monitor's club. - Just a monitor so that they can fucking hear the laughs. 'Cause that was the worst part is when they do jokes and you're like, "I don't know if they knew that that was funny 'cause it feels like the audience didn't." - We could hear very well. - We could. - Yeah, that part was great. - I mean, I don't know, man, I had a blast. So it was me, Tom, Eric, Tom's wife, Eric's chick, me and my chick, Lewis. - Guests of the party should be here. - And then one last see for our friend Molly. - That's fun. - And oh my God, so you were probably hugging people. - We were having a blast. - Yeah. - And was there a moment of like being very proud of Jay where you were like so much? - And Shane, were you like, "Yes, are you going?" - And Tony and Pete, and you go, "Look at all these guys doing it." - Yeah. - They're doing it. - I mean, even just seeing Jay up there, I went and slept high five beforehand. I could see him like this. I was like, "He was great." - He was great. - He was great. - And I kept looking at Shane's people. - We kept looking at Jay with doing these. - Yeah, the three four life. - And he would do it. - Three four life as a camera. - Shane would look out. I could see him looking at me and I was like, "So that would be funny. "With funny as they were moments where we were watching, during the rock thing, we were just watching Shane stare down and we were like, "But then I knew Tommy and Chris "and all of them were at a table." - They were there too. I was here. They were there. - That's what we were wondering. - We were wondering if they were in Shane's eye line 'cause he would do something. - He was looking out. - Shane was so smooth and having a good time that when he started riffing at the end, Cheryl was the only one that really rift. You could see the monitor if you looked and she was like, "Talk." And she was like, "Yeah, I'm gonna do my work." - He should speak from the heart. - Yeah. - Yeah. - But Shane was eating and came back out and did great. - Having a blast, talk. And he was like, "He was so smooth with that." I would have been sweating and I couldn't, I wouldn't be able to see anybody from there. - The first thing I noticed that he broke, which really made me laugh, was when Tom Brady thinking that he came back and he goes, "Well, that was fucking annoying." - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - And he was like, "Oh, he didn't pre-write that." - He didn't pre-write that. - He was just a common moment. - He was just feeling it. - Yeah. - It was like, "Was it fucking crazy?" Like his genuine react. - Like if you went on stage at the stand and tried to character that didn't go anywhere, I would and you wouldn't fault me for going, "Hey, Jen, remember when you thought that would work?" - Yes, you know. - That's the whole point of a roast. - And as you go, "Well, that fucking sucked." - Exactly. - And it's a roast. - Yeah, I thought it was great. - I thought it was very long, but I think like in the age of modern celebrities that they're gonna edit everything out, if they don't like a thing that was said, you're like, "Great, I would say you should be able to edit, but only if what I said didn't work." Let's take that down a little bit, not, I don't get any on what other people say to me. - Yeah. - Yeah, you should be able to control your own self. - It was so funny, Chelsea and these jokes written in about how totally this problematic and Shane is problematic after Shane to get brings her up as she hangs out with Epstein. - That was the best thing to do with her. - That was funny. - You don't like Jews because I was never even accused about like Jews. - Yeah, I've never seen a better intro on a roast. - I'm just flat out, fucking fat. - And I love Chelsea. It was just a funny way to do it. - What the fuck are you drinking? - Mate. - Sinterba. - Sinterba mate. - What is that? - It is. - It's like he's drinking leaves. - Yeah. - Is it weed? - It's Argentinian. - What is it? - It's just ground up. - It's just everywhere from Southern South. - Hold on, can I show the camera? I don't know if the camera can see this, but it's like, it looks like fucking, yeah. Oh, here we go. - Maninita, it's a decent brand. Maninita. - What is that? Like a coffee? - No, it's tea. Everyone in South Eastern Chile, to all of Argentina, Uruguay, and then Southern Brazil, and then in Paraguay, they drink it cold. - Fucking animals. - Cold. - So that's hot water, it's hot-ish. It's not boiling. - And you put it in this and it makes it like a tea. - Did you need this before this last adventure? - No, this adventure is what I get into it. - This adventure? - Yeah. - Is that the part about driving a camper van on shitty, shitty roads in Patagonia, or with winds so high that when you pass somebody, like I make it taken into them. You would pee and spray everywhere if you got out to pee, and I needed some energy. So I was driving and it was like, cut me, cut me. And you just keep the stuff you were doing. - Was that easier to find than like coffee? In Argentina and Uruguay, it's everywhere. So everywhere. At every airport, if you're an airport, they'll have a water fountain and a Urba fountain, where you can get the right, is that it? - It's a brand, there's like 10 brands. - Okay. - It's a decent brand. - Today's episode is brought to you by Manianita. - Guys, let me see if you're looking for the green. - I would love some smoothie. - You know what I'm talking about? - Love is a sponsor of a language I didn't speak and I had no clue it's cultural relevance. I just think that's always something that I've always-- - That's a little morning. What's Manianita? - Maniana, Manianita. - Maniana, I don't, I don't, maybe talking-- - I need to look it up. - Yeah. - But that thing about, you're like a, this is the kind of friend everyone should have that tries crazy shit, that maybe you don't wanna try, but sometimes occasionally it is some shit you wanna try and you go, this isn't one of them. - Okay, it looks like you're drinking fucking mulch. - I'm honest enough to tell you like, hey, I tried it, like, I don't do that. - Yeah. - Or like, dude, you should. - Sure. - Like, guinea pig, I'm like, oh, Neal came to visit and I'm like, bro, it's not a funny thing to eat. It's delicious. - So I had a teacher in high school, those from Peru, and she was like, we love guinea pig. It's guinea pig all the time. It's not like anyone you believe what we're doing. But we were like white kids in Colorado, and I think it was like high school or middle school. We were like, ew, you eat fucking guinea pig? And then my friend who was very smart was like, oh no, it's a delicacy there, they like love it. - Yeah, you can't even afford it always, 'cause it's like, graduation shit. But also, a whole one is like, 30 bucks. - Did you, and try it, guinea pig? - It's earthy. - Oh, this? - It's earthy, yeah, I'll try it. I'm like, I ain't trying to get it. - Just suck it all down. - I like guinea pig. It's earthy. So it takes some getting used to. - Yeah, I don't hate it. I don't hate it. I thought I was gonna hate it. It's very tea. It's very like, if your bag of tea busted open. - So some people with good sugar in there, other people put one mint leaf and buried in there, or a little slice of lemon to give some taste. - What was this shit you were drinking? - Remember when we were doing sixth and jump, and you got drunk with those construction workers, and they gave you like a bucket of something. Do you remember that? This was in Central America, and you were like, "I think." - Yeah, you were like, you took. - You like, showed up, first off, when we were doing sixth and jump during the pandemic. We're all on Zoom. Jay and I are in Zoom in New York. - Well, at a good time. - But I love them. That's a worth it. - Oh, yeah. - Oh, for COVID? - For COVID. - Anyone else got it? - Whatever your mom got. - For your mom and people are gone. - Gone and forgot. - But those memories are real. But I remember you showing up, like at first it's Ari's apartment, and then you guys went to Central America in South America, and all of a sudden it was just a jungle as your setting. While everyone was changing their settings to look like jungles. - Let me put some books in that I might have wanted to read. - Or they're doing a fake one of like, "Look at me, I'm in the tropics." Straight up Ari was just on a porch with the jungle behind them, and we were like, "Oh, that's real." - Did I had such few joys? And one of them was like, "I'm about to log on. Let me make this look as ridiculous as possible." - And you would like walk through with this jaw. - Oh, what's going on? - Yeah. - And then like, which by the way, I think I'm telling you this live on my podcast, but Jay and I agreed for scanning fest this year, we're doing six and jump again. I should do it too. - No, we don't, you fucking dickhead. We're gonna watch Johnny Depp's last episode. - That's great. - I think we'll do Depp's last episode. - And we should do that. - When he left. - When he left. - Like the final Johnny Depp episode, it's the best thing I was getting for you to do some of this stuff. - Yeah, I'm in. - And then how we did it? 'Cause we did the movie Watch Along at Netflix's Joke and I tried to explain to him how we did Sixth and Joke was perfect with the monitors in front. The venue just couldn't do it. But there was a lag between the movie and the monitors at Netflix's a joke. - So by million dollars a second, not to get the sound right, not enough. I mean, we had a bunch of problems. They didn't download it. Remember how, dude, before, that's why when DeRosa said that, and you'll hear this, by the way, we're gonna, I think we're gonna release the Maiden Manhattan Watch Along with Tim Dillon, Joe DeRosa and James McCann on "Punch Up Live." We did a thing where we were like, we'll download it, and we're like, it's Netflix. We'll just stream Netflix. And then in the middle of it, it crashed. And the Wi-Fi. And you're like, "Dude, this is why we told you." - That was rogue and when he did the live thing, it was, "Dude, I watch the live." He goes, "So how was the live?" I'm like, "I mean, it lagged a bunch." It kept flipping off. The jokes were great, but like, it kept lagging. It was not a pleasurable experience to watch. But it was something that we anticipated. And we were like, "Hey, we should download the movie." Which we did on "Sixth and Jump." And it worked fantastic. We could go back, we could go forward. That was when Seabock was a literate. We found out what a great time. We should have put that out on something, Piedmont. - Yeah, dude, in the Piedmont, there is no career day. - You should find all those and just put them up on your "Punch Up." - And by the way, punchup.live is where it is, 'cause everyone will sign up. I know it's summer, but hey, you still need jeans. I'm a jeans all year round guy. I think everybody, single-person listening knows that. No one's going like, "Oh, really?" But, you know what, jeans are great? The perfect jeans. I'm talking about jeans that feel like sweatpants. Fit great, but look just like awesome denim. You can go get perfect jeans. I'm telling you how they feel. I know they got a little stretch material, but when you wear it, you're like, "Damn, dude, this fits me perfect." 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Yeah. That was my favorite thing we made. It was great. It was so famous. But it was a pandemic podcast where first it was locked down and we had nothing to do with how this come together. And everyone got the third and fourth podcast and second third. And then it became like, oh, shit, we're back in the road. This is getting more difficult. Yeah, we're really sad to have left it. Yeah, but it was such a fun thing. Such a fun. They kept our sanity. It really honestly, like I would get in the studio apartment I rented on like whatever. That was the first time we saw each other in a long time. And we got to hang out. People forget the good parts of COVID, which was like seeing your friends again and you realize you missed seeing your friend that he's like, I'm trying to figure out how I get this done. I don't know. But it was fun. It was so fun. There's things about humanity that like technology takes away that you're like, no, dude, there was fun about seeing each other again about like that's what I didn't like about the festival. It didn't have the festival. No, hang out except the store was a de facto one, but that was booze. So it's not as pleasurable. But also the store was fun. It was too packed. It was too packed. It was overwhelming. I couldn't have a conversation with somebody without someone else being like, no, can I just break in? Yeah, I mean, I mean, we should have a norm in it. It was like freaking out. I was like, I know it's a lot because that was where my home was. I started there. I know, I know I know crevices come with me. By the way, shout out Rose. Because she immediately was like, oh, I was smoking joint in the back. There's no way back there right now. You guys go back there. And I went back there with like three people. We hung out. Rose was a waitress at first. So she also knows Rose. Those were everything. Yeah, she was like, get over here. This shit's going on at one point. She was like, just go around here because I was like, I want to smoke a joint and she was like, you're fine. Yeah, it was fun. I had more and more. I go back. I understand the store in a way that I don't think I did when I was just here in New York. Oh, you probably looked at it as this place. It was our clubhouse. I mean, what I think like more and more I go back. I see that, especially because like, I remember early on when you were still you were living here, but you'd go back to LA. If I was in LA and you were there, I'd be like, I'll go to the store because Ari can show me around. Yeah. But now the more I've gone, I've been like, Oh, I see where people hang kind of how it moves. It's a road and try to recreate. It was like, where the hangout spots gonna be? Like where might you all just end up gathering? One is in the stores, the back hallway, and the door guys my old job was to go to massive celebrities because guys, I'm so sorry. It's bleeding. You got to, you got to leave the hallway. Was there anywhere you went there that you remember being a prick about it? About being like you being like a door guy and being like, hey, dude, I'm sorry, because when they do that, a lot of times you're you're in the middle of having fun. You're like interrupting having fun. We're like joking around and shit. People are like, luckily, they were comedians, celebrities. And so they would get, I'm like, guys, you're f*ckin' up the show. Do you mind? I got to get you outside or in or out, in or out. Well, a couple times where I was the door guy. One time, probably two times. One time I was working the booth at the comedy store and the time, Duncan had left. He was a talent corner. So I was the assistant talent corner. So if somebody wanted something, it fell to me just for two weeks. What a shitty spot to be in as a comic. Yeah. So you're getting people's egos. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. But I was like, you didn't work HR. You didn't work HR for two weeks. But not really. It was just Mitzi doing it. We're just driving it down and delivering the message. Sure. There was no like hook me up like we can't, she's still involved. So anyway, this black homeless guy came through the back door of the main room towards me and the back door guy points at him, like get him out. Some guy in a f*cking in sweatpants and a sweatshirt. And I was like, f*ck, okay, how do I do this? Because I'm 140 pounds. I'm not a good door guy, but I know not to f*ck it the show. I'm like, let him get out first, then close it behind him. It's like trapping a bug. Yeah, you go. Well, how are you going to get this bug out of this? If it's going on zone, let him go. Just go with it. Shut the window. Shut the window. So, so he comes out and I put the thing behind me and I can help you and he turns and it's Chris Rock. It's not some black guy. It's Chris Rock. And he goes, can I go on next? And I may not have my fists ready to f*cking fight. And I have to do tooth. I'm like, one. Oh, there's no fight. And two, there's an actual super high level comedian asking me for, he needs information. And I was like, oh, okay, yeah. Well, people usually go on in the original room, not the main room. And he goes, yeah, but I looked the line up. There's like four comics left in the original room. And this is the last comic in the main room. It's better not to bump anybody, right? And I was like, that's nice to hear. Yeah, that is nice to hear. I've never seen him before. That's the first time he came in. That's crazy. And I was like, yeah, by the way, did about 55 minutes or so till 155. And he goes, ah, sh*t, well, I know the waitresses get off it too. So I don't want to keep them. Great. So that's it for me. Man, I'll tell you right now. And this goes about any job. This is not just stand up. This is not just entertainment. When people understand what other people do at a job, it makes them such a better f*cking coworker. Where you go, yeah, you're being a dick. Even if you let rise up and become a vice president, if you go, well, I know the guy at the parking garage gets off at 8. I don't want to stay past 8 because then this parking garage guy's got to wait. It was like, when I was a waiter and I was waiting on a table and it was late and it was like the dinner and people would look around and go, oh sh*t, bring this check now. We'll get it here. Yeah, oh yeah, versus on my birthday one year, I was working at Thursday night and this couple had a romantic dinner where they were talking to each other about how cute it was. They shut down the restaurant and you go, well, it's not cute. I turned on the lights and my manager got mad at me because he was like, no, you got to keep the lights low. It's like, it's two hours past our closing and I've pulled everything from their table. All they have is water glasses in the movie. It's like, it's so cute. We shut it down. It's like, you're saying behind the things. I'm like, come on. I literally would come back like this. I would come back from smoking a cigarette. We don't have to play my apron on. Can you move? And I look at the bus or I go, Francisco, they still there and he's like, see? And you're like, I'm like in the kitchen like, I want to go get drunk. I want to go get drunk with my it's my birthday too. So it's like, you know when you're when you're poor and it's your birthday and you work at a job like a waiting put, you're like, people are going to buy me drinks. This is the one time a year where I'm going to have a free bar tap. Please let me go and they're like, I could stare into your eyes. But I like with big comics do that. Ray Romano does that. Ray Romano comes into the cellar and he goes, who's up? And you're like, there he goes, all right, I'll go up next. And you're like, thanks Ray. And like, I'm going to start doing impressions. Hey, when did you become a voice guy? I remember one time, Louis, I was, this is before he got in trouble. This is when he was like, king shit. I was sitting on the stairs and he came in and he didn't like talk to lower level comics, but he came in and he, I was sitting on the stairs and they're like, well, Dan Soder is next. And he looked at me and he goes, is it cool if I go up and do like 10 to 15 and you go, you could have done it. Thank you for asking. Absolutely. Yes. That's exactly what I said. I go, you could have done that. You didn't need to ask. It's also funny. So you do need to ask. It's just so few people have that you're like, you technically don't have to. We know we understand you don't have to, but like you do need to. As a human, you do. Just none of them do. Not it'll become surprising when they come in and they're like, that's why like what broke my heart about Chappelle when I was, he was there and Michelle Wolfen, I were like getting bumped and he like knows Michelle. He's like friends with her and I'm on there and he was just like, I was upstairs and someone from the club was like, Dave, are you going to go up? And he goes, I don't really know if I want to. You know what? I'll go up and now you just bumped. Now you see that guy. Don't fucking ask him. Yeah, that's exactly, I won't tell you which manager it was, but I went up and I went, what the fuck? Now I don't get to go up and they were like, oh, you know, and you're like, oh, fucking, I get it. I mean, I get it. But also like, but being a good coworker, I think that art is lost. like the art of like being empathetic towards a guy you work with. - I send all my managers and assistants and agents and assistants. I'll, I get high and get ideas, so I'm sending it. But now I go, oh, let me schedule send this for Monday morning. - Sure. - And not for Friday night, dude. This is when I have the idea, but you don't have to, or I'll go, guys, this is definitely after the weekend thing. If it's Friday day, I'm like, this is definitely for next week. This is not urgent. - Yeah. - But my idea is here right now and I will forget it. - That's great. And that's like, there really is like this thing of, you know, my manager lives in L.A., so there's mornings where I wake up. It's nine in the morning here and I'm up and I'm like, hey, fucking, I'm about to type it and I'm like, it's six in the morning there. - Schedule send. - Yes, schedule send is fucking giant. The other major time I was, there was a homeless guy that came in, like a white homeless guy and I was like, no, no, and I'm walking down the hallway, but then as I get up there, I notice he's talking to dice. So I'm like, okay, now he's bugging dice. But also he's got a mink coat on and I'm like, no. And then, and then I'm like, and Eleanor was like, I was like, oh, and I kept walking by and I just kept walking by. - That's crazy though, you're like, no, no, no, no, no, no. - Absolutely not. - Oh, it's one of the greatest producers of all time. Daddy's the thing about L.A., that is. - Save your fucking, look like a man's Rick. - Daddy's the difference between L.A. and New York City, oh. - I can't just show what that look. - Is the New York City straight up will be a homeless guy. It will not be Rick Rubin or Chris Rock. You get a guy, you go, it's covered in shit. And he's inside, the crazy thing about being a door guy is the fact that you're a comic that has to be a bouncer. It's the only club I know where they make it the best because the comics respect the door guys 'cause half of them used to be that. - Yeah, legitimately wore the same t-shirt. - The way you talk about it, the way Tony talks about it, the way anybody that came up to be Lee was. - And then if you weren't, your friend was. - Sure. - And so, or you saw one go from nobody to a theater comic and so you're like, boy, these guys, yeah, they're comics. - This guy might be one of the door guys in the store came up to me when we were hanging out at the festival and he's like, I do a danger field. And he was like, hey, hey, and I was like, oh, it's not bad. And he tried doing it and I was like, all right, that was enough. And it was back and then later I'm walking through and he stops me and he goes, oh, I have so much anxiety that I did that for him. And I was like, no, that's great. I ordered that too. It's fine. - There it is. Regular dog guy went into the second part. - Yeah, no, first. - But a comic is like, oh, fuck, what did I do? But I loved, 'cause they are comics, but they're also new comics. - Hey, that's something, bro. But that's something that I used to feel. I wasn't a door guy in New York. You're not a door guy. - Do you just do it next? - I appreciate you guys. - But you guys don't have to interact with the comics. - That's the whole point. It's like, I would be at New York comedy club or the seller and I would say something and you'd be like, what? And then I wasn't there to go, I fucked up. I just walk around the fucking village being like, I fucked up. I fucked up. - At no time, like the beginning times. Ralphie told me that early on. - He was like, how long? - He was like, about a year and he goes, that's when it's just fun. I didn't get it 'cause I was starving. - Sure. - But like. - That's a big fucking shit. - Yeah, I was like, today I had to eat legitimate, left over hamburger, some McDonald's that I froze. Because was that your, was that your point? - 0.9 cents cheeseburger, 39 cents hamburger, vice versa, Sundays and Wednesday. So it was like, you'd load up, freeze a bunch of those and the rest of the week, you could. I was a subway, chicken teriyaki on Italian herbs and cheeses, six inches at dinner the next day, six inches for lunch, split my bag of potato chips and I get a large drink that I could drink half and have, it was all that halves and then staff me at the restaurant. I gotta get you a yamaka. Oh, dude, that was it. - You've earned it. - Thank you. - You don't want to realize, you're actually putting your time. - I really fucking, that means a lot. It does mean a lot. As someone that grew up watching Mel Brooks movies and had his alcoholic father using Yiddish from the clump. I'm a little, I'm a little of a clump. And honestly, it's proper usage. - Yeah. - What's funny is I didn't realize, 'cause Colorado, I knew one Jewish, I knew two Jewish kids. And then I moved to New York and I would say stuff and they'd be like, you're using Yiddish and you're like, oh fuck, I didn't even realize I was a, I was a jigger. And what do you call a white kid? White kid that wants to be, I was a, - When I was asked me on my trip, I know you were about to. - Oh, about you. - You're just, you're just the guy that I go like, what did you eat? - Oh yeah. - 'Cause like, could you imagine big J and I on a trip like yours being like, I don't wanna eat that. - I was an Ecuador and I heard for the first time, six months there, for the first time I heard an American accent. - And it's that like. - Okay, first it was like, you went on for what? - Seven months. - Six months that one. - Yeah, just an Ecuador car, driving around, bandit. And then I heard an accent, but then I was like, wait, that's not an American accent. That is rural Phil Delfio accent. - Yeah, you were the first accent I heard, and they were at the, you can get one of those gazebo things of the beach. - Sure. - For five bucks for the day, right. Rent a surfboard for $3 or five or six for two hours. It was like, oh my God, it was the best. And then eventually I'm like, hey, what do you guys? Yeah, and they were like, once we started talking, they're like, hey, there's a chicken paccata over there. It's so good. - That's so good. - And I was like, I'm not even a chicken paccata in Ecuador. That's actually a good food here. - Yeah, yeah, we actually talked them into doing it. - Yeah. - We were doing it. - Two of them ran a DQ in Wildwood. - Yeah, you ever had Guinea pig. - Those guys were old so much. - You ever had a Guinea pig and a Guinea pig, Hagi? (laughing) - Don't put that on. Don't make a hoagie out of Guinea pig. - I met one of them again once at a show recently that came and I was like, there's some people saying they met you and I'm like, oh, bring those guys in. - That's awesome. - Yeah. - That's fun. That's funny shit to see you and you're like, tarzian, back-end society? - Two weeks, it was good. When you meet someone from traveling afterwards, it just becomes like the people from lost when they met in real life after and we got to go back. - Yeah. - We got to get back to the island. - It's like summer camp friends. When you had summer camp friends when you were young and then you would see him back home in reality go, well, I got my regular friends. - There is shit that you and Jay would eat and list and stuff like that. But I would tell you, like, you can try this one. Or this one's too spicy, don't, this one is what it is. 'Cause I'll try everything. - That's the cooking show. - You try food. - Food is amazing. - Food has the best food in South America. Trip to South America with me, list and Jay. - Yeah. - And you are our bobby fly. - And it's like, all right, tell me what you kind of can't do. - Yeah. - And they, 'cause-- - And if it's like, I really do not want to risk stomach flu and I'm like, I'm gonna cross half these off the list then. - What happened? - I'm like, spicy. I'm like, great, we'll stay in Uruguay. - What happened to questions? What happened when you go sideways? Like, what happened to when it's too spicy? Did you eat something where you're like-- - I'm not, my dad was, my dad raised me on spice. - Oh, he did. - Yeah, I'm the guy who goes to Thai and they're like, Thai spice like, I don't know, I'm like, I know, I know, just get it. - Really? So you've been a spicy guy your whole life. - I would have to get my Asian roommate at Maryland to ask for extra spicy on the phone because they wouldn't believe my accent. - So you need to ask for extra spicy. - Do you find that it's so hot, it's enjoyable? - Yeah. - That, you're that kind of guy. - My mom's boyfriend was like that. - What was that? - He was like, I want it, like, whatever, what the scale is. - When pleasure meets pain. - Yes. - What is that, hell-raiser? - Yeah, yeah. - But the scale of the-- - Skolval. - Skolval's or whatever? - Roar Skolval's. - Roar Skolval's. - Yeah. - They improv how hot it is. And you enjoy it the whole time? - I don't know how it is. - But he was like, do you speak this like hot sauce store in Boulder? And we would like go up to Boulder. My mom's boyfriend would be like proud of being like, what's the hot sauce when you got? And it'd be like a Carolina Reaper pepper, Reaper pepper, and he'd be like, yeah, that's spicy, but he wouldn't freak out. - I was like a Reaper. - Bitch with spice, dude. My dad'll do that. He made this own, you know, like not the Sriracha, but the other brand where it's got all the seeds in it and stuff. - Sure. - Red and thick, so he even made that in his own. And he had to ferment it, let it go. And remember, and it was me, for me, even then, it would take, let's say, Salami sandwich on rye, and I would take like a little bit, spread it very thin all over, like one spoonful all the way around, and I'd still be like, oh, I'd put ketchup on top of it. I'd be like, oh my god. You'd be fucked up. - My dad would test it. Would take a spoon, go, go. Oh yeah, that's good. - Whoa. - But it's like, no, it's spicy. - Did your siblings have a similar love? Was there any sibling that didn't like spice? - My brother's kid loves it. - Rhea, but your brother didn't. - My brother said, okay. - But your brother's kids like you. He's like an animal. He's like, I want fucking. - And I'm not trying to punish myself. I like the taste. - I guess my question is, is someone that is a bitch about it. Like I have children, I have like, I'll put Sriracha on stuff. And I find it enjoyable, but that's me older. When I was younger, I hated spice. I was like, this is too spicy, I need mild. I was a bitch. And as I got older, I was like, I feel the same about chlamydia. - You know, I learned a lot of it. - I know you got it. - She's got to get used to it. - You know what I'm saying? - It really makes you get hold of it. - It really gives you the dick hole heat you're looking for. But like, with the spice thing, has there ever been something that's too much for you when you travel? - Thai spicy in Thailand. But down there, and did you have to request it? Did you have to go like pick the fight and be like, give me your spicy shit? Or they're like, they just gave it to you. And you're like, oh, they just gave it to you. The one you want to know off you are in a semi-tourist area. And they see you being white. Oh, we've gotten complaints before from your type. And I'm like, glad you said that. I'm still fine, go for it. - That's always like the white thing is, is do you just know it? Like if they know white, they go, they're gonna fucking complain about the spice. - Or if they don't know it's their tourist, they don't know to to warn them. - Yeah. - 'Cause they just go this way. It's like the amount of ranch you get in Nebraska. Where you just go like, I bet they see like, other people and they go, like Europeans, they go, you don't want this much ranch. - Or that stuff in Chicago, I was in a salad, me and Rogan is salad somewhere in Chicago. And we're like, I'm like, hold on. I'm like, excuse me, ham, did you put sugar on this? And she goes, is it too much for you? I'm like, it was such a like, yeah, of course, was crazy. Did I go, ham? - Crazy. - But I go too much. - I, none! - And I salad. when I quit sugar and drink. drinks when I like had to make that effort to get it out of my coffee and get it out of my iced tea. Once I had Southern sweet tea again, I was like, what the fuck? That's like Thai spice, but for sugar. You're like, dude, this is fucking crazy. This is just sugar. And they're like, sweetay. You're like, I don't like this. I'm getting diabetes right now. But it does rule if you can like it. Like I can like really sweet. Very hot, I'm still a bitch. I don't know what I'm talking about in the summer because it's all hot is bedding. It's only a winter talk. Everyone's like, oh, I got good bedding in the winter. You need to sleep good in the summer too. A nice cool crisp sheet when you hit the bed. 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Again, BrooklynBedding.com promo code Sodor. I know those of you who have been listening for a while, even back when I was on the bonfire, you know I got Lasix, so you know I got these laser eyes, but they wear off. And honestly, when I come back to my glasses days, I'm going right back to Warby Parker. It's who I used when I had glasses, and it's who I used when I returned to glasses. Warby Parker, one stop shop, you go in, you can get an appointment with an optometrist in the back to take a look at your eyes to see, you know, how good your vision is doing. They'll do the appointment right in house, and then they have your prescription. You can go pick glasses out in the front, so then you have glasses you love with the prescription you need, bam, it's all right there. And when it comes to quality for the price, Warby Parker's the best, not even close. They used to have to be, oh, I'm going to spend a bunch of money on these glasses. I hope they stay forever. Warby Parker, you get two pairs of glasses. If you're irresponsible like me and you'll lose them all the time, Warby Parker comes completely, Warby Parker completely changed that. The prescription glasses started just $95, so you actually get quality and stylish frames at an affordable price. All in one place, like I said before, which makes everything so much easier. And it also includes contacts, online eye exams, and sunglasses. Maybe the best part of Warby Parker, for every pair they sell, they also give one to someone in need. Warby Parker has distributed over 20 million pairs of glasses to people in need through its buy a pair, give a pair of program. Right now, by one pair of glasses, you can get 20% off in any additional pair at WarbyParker.com/Sotter. That's 20% off any additional pairs when you purchase at W-A-R-B-Y-Parker.com/Sotter. Second thing, when you get food poisoning on the road, like that you do, and you will, and you go into it knowing that you will. Is that the way you accept it when you travel? I've gotten enough times by now. There's just no avoiding it. My, my, my, on the ill, on the ill check, 'cause I got it, and we all at the same stuff and share with each other, like which, it might be a bounce of something in a shower, like a bounce off a shoulder. You always think you know what it is, and then it could be anything. Yeah, dude, it could be, it's literally a drop of water. You, so you, you can wash stuff in the sink, you just have to dry it completely off before you have it. So if a plate comes wet, you got to like, no, and just like, I'd rather be, Bobby Kelly said it the best. It's safer. It's more dangerous there to brush your teeth with the sink water than it is here to brush your teeth with toilet water. Really? As long as it's flushed. That's fucking awesome. It's just gross. You don't even think about that and you go like, yeah, we're still in the mode of like, I think water, brush teeth. (laughing) We got a grade here. One more. Shoveling it in, but like when you have, when you're like going and knowing you have-- I saw Fassafira's five when I was there in real, and there's a scene where she's like in the favela, and they're hiding away and she goes like this with water and she drinks some. And I'm like, nope, rest of the movies are shitting. Rest of the movie is shitting now. Hey, who'd you drink the water? She's on the outside of the door and she's like, no, I'm gonna get out of here. They're gonna get me, but do you have like, no, there's a tri-pack. That's what I'm taking immediately. I know my technique is good. That's what I mean, don't wait. Don't wait 'cause you can't hold it down, you're fucked. You know when they show assassins assemble a rifle? Anyways, I just assume you do that with diarrhea when you're traveling. Where it's like, shh, shh, shh. And you put something together and you're like, take this, now go over there. There's a small difference in feeling between food poisoning and just diarrhea. Do you know what it is? Make the decision right away, which one is this? 'Cause it's gonna get worse, but right now it's about the same. It's like this and then you know it's gonna go there. 'Cause if it's gonna be the diarrhea, shitting, and pooping, you're not gonna be able to keep the pill down. You gotta keep it down for two hours. And if you have a sip of water, it will make you barf. Then you can't get the pill down. Sure, it's your advice. Pre-do it, if you think it might be or probably is, get that pill down now, start it working. It's one a day for three days. You're still gonna suffer, but start the process. What pill, a modium AD? Is that such white guy stuff? Is that like me going like, shh, bro? That's like me going like, I like Tabasco, who we're talking about spice. A modium AD is a pocket Palestinian throw a rock at an IDF troop and thinking it'll make a difference. A modium AD. It's a dick. It really? 'Cause I always, when I went to Mexico, when I went to Mexico, when I was in Arizona, when I went to Mexico, when I was at Arizona, when I went to Mexico, I'd take a modium AD, and I was fine. That's for basic diarrhea, not food poison. Not food poison, okay. So diarrhea works, diarrhea sure it works. And I want you, I want the people at home who know that. A modium AD does work for diarrhea. In Southeast Asia, I never didn't have diarrhea, four and a half straight months. Not a solid. Just constantly, when you got home and you pooped solid, did it scare you? Where you're like, my war hands were leaving me. Oh, right. Right, it did come out solid. Yeah, of course. 'Cause I do feel like if you normalize diarrhea, normalize diarrhea, that's a t-shirt. That's the name of the episode. Normalize diarrhea, normalize diarrhea. Why aren't Americans normalizing diarrhea? I did bring a nice souvenir home from Carnival in Brazil. I got some late night street meat the last day, which is like, they're closing, I'm like, "Damn, that means it's been out. "I want it, my last street meat." And I didn't shit a log for about three weeks after I got home. Right away. Is it worth it? Yeah. 'Cause sometimes I'll do street meat and I'll go like, I really want it. Yeah, and then I'll hurt afterwards and I'll go. It was worth it. It was worth it. Yeah, worth the pain. There's worth it. Yeah. 'Cause you're like, I took a tumble. It's a good life thing. Yeah, and it says, that was the standy used to get off when I worked at K-Rock. I'd get done it two in the morning and I'd go on sixth avenue. And there was one place and sometimes it would be, sometimes it would fuck me up, but I was new. I was like, "Hey, we're gonna go into this Sunday night suck." But this is gonna be a great meal at 2.45 in the morning. It has to be worth it. I don't want it to be the delivery McDonald's that made you leave before the encore of LCD sound system. First off, I fucked up, this is a good place to us for us to remedy this situation. I need to apologize. I'm legitimately angry about it. I'm not mad, mad, but when I think of it, it doesn't go, "Oh yeah, good times." It goes, "No, that sucked." Can I tell you where I fucked up? Okay. And why me leaving wasn't the problem. Okay. Ari and I love LCD sound system. We've had great times at them. Great times at them. Bono were the first, Brooklyn steal the second, and then we were going back to Brooklyn steal the scene again with good seats. I fucked up. And we're in our 40s and 50s, we need ear plugs. We just do. If you're young, I will tell you the best advice for concerts, get comfortable with ear plugs. It makes your day the next day much better. At minimum, take a piece of, if you don't have a piece of napkin to shove them in. Just do it, because you're gonna get to age, even if you're in your 20s now in your life. - Drugs hit the same regardless. - Yeah, the drugs hit the same, you're all fine. And then the next day when you wake up, you don't have tenitis. You don't have that. You're just like, "Oh, it was a great concert." So I had to try to take another one. - I'm supposed to take another one. - I'm a mother of fucker. - Yeah, good luck editing. At the time, I had ear plugs that were, the ones you want-- - Swimmers? - Yes. The ones you want are the orange ones made for concerts. Do you already, do you keep that thing on you? - I would like. - There you go. - The light. And by the way, little tip, little small-- - Swifter's enough before you jam it in your-- - On your, take the lens up before you jam it. It's on the way into the airplane. If you are stopped in that line, we're like, "Everyone's rushed to get in." Then you stop and slowly, write that little room right before you enter the airplane. That's there. - Sure. - That's like, the, the, the, the, the thing. - Yeah, okay. - Sometimes they have a bag of them. - Yo. - And there's no orange ones. - The orange ones. - The orange ones. - That's all the time. - Hand full ear plug. - And those are really good for concerts. - Really good. - You still hear everything? - So I fucked up and I bought these like, ones off Amazon that were for swimmers. So they block water out of your ear. They also block a ghostly sound. - A ghostly sound. - And a good time. - And Katie, Ari and I all had these in. And I kept being like, Thank you. making it out and being like, I can't fucking hear. Taking it out, and then we were there for the whole concert. And I was like, oh fuck, and at the end I took them out and I was like, I fucked up, I fucked up. - It doesn't, the sound on sound system. Elsies, it overwhelms you, the slow rises, the four and a half minute long drops, instead of 20 second drops. She gets so into it, but it's gotta envelop you. - Yeah. - And we didn't let it explode. - And I fucked up. And we were hungry and we were like, let's get the fuck out of here. And we left to get food. - I was like, okay. - Yeah, and it was one of those things where I was like, we're gonna leave. But I feel like I ruined the night with the earplugs. - Yeah. - So I gotta buy, we had good area. We got to a place right before some stances before the VIP, so we're right behind the VIP. But we had rooms, we could do, it's a lot of jumping. - Yes. - We had something to hold onto. - And I fucked up with the earplugs. - And I've done it before I jump and it's tough to go this way, you end up going like, yeah, my jumping is not. So then I have to put my hand on somebody a lot of times, a stranger, and I'm on a lot of Molly. I'm gonna, and I don't want to step on 'em. And so people look back and I'm like, sorry. They go, oh, it's cool. - Hey, you're vibing. - You're vibing. - I fucked up. - I think the only way to redo this is I need to get us tickets to LCD Sound System the next time they're in town. - The worst part was they have a song with a chorus that just, and it makes you think of, oh, the great ones are, I think of like Ralphie a lot or whatever. But when they start repeating, where are your friends tonight? - Yeah. - Where are your friends tonight? - Like, minor at home with pooping out McDonald's. - They left. They left to go eat McDonald's. Where, yeah, dude, I really fucked up. I was like, I know, right? - I know. - Hey, I know, right? (laughing) And I did, you know what? And I'm taking accountability. - Okay, thank you. - I absolutely fucked up. - Thank you. - And I'm sorry for that, and I will bring, I will bring the proper earplugs the next time that we do drugs and go see LCD Sound System. 'Cause I'll tell you right now. One of my greatest privileges in life is doing drugs and going to concerts with R.I.S.H.E. - It rules so much. - It rules so much. - We've been talked down to by some alcoholic people. - And it got, I'm like, our drug is so much better than your drug. Fuck off. - You know what's the memory that I have at the Terminal 5? We went and saw St. Paul in the Broken Bones. - God, they got climbed all this shit. - They got climbed this shit, gave a hell of a performance. R.E. Greg Stone and I, that's who it was. We ate edibles and we sat there and watched, and we're all tall. The three of us tall. And then these little tiny women behind us. - That's right. - Hey, we can't see. We can't see in front of you. - And we can't not stand, we're a standard. - Yeah, we're standing. - No choice. - So we move, we open the wall and we go ahead. And it was two daughters and their mom and their dad. And the two daughters and the mom went ahead of us. And the dad was standing there. And the daughters said, we bought him tickets. He loves St. We bought the tickets for Father's Day. And so, you know, the human gate is open of R.E. Greg and I. - Go right now, we'll pull back. - To the dad, we go, go ahead, dude. Go ahead and he goes, "I'm okay." And we go, "No, no, no, we really don't mind." And I remember he said, "I don't do what I said." And he said, "No, dude, be with your family." And he looks right at me and he goes, "I'm good." And then we shut the human gate. So the mom and the daughters were in front of us. Dad was behind us. I've never seen a guy have a better time at a concert. He just wanted to be a woman. - He got separated from his family. And he had two drinks and he was behind us. - And just wanted to be alone. - There's a song called "Burning Rome." And his family was in front of us. And like one of the daughters was on her phone and the mom's like kind of like they were in it. And he's behind us with two beers and he goes, "They played Burning Rome!" - Yeah. - They played Burning Rome. He was like screaming it and I was laughing about it. But like, we got you something for Father's Day. Like what is it? It goes, "Four tickets to save the world." And he's like, "Yeah." And he's like, "Okay, who do I bet?" So we're all gonna get crazy. - Yeah. - He's a Craig market. Oh yeah. Dude, that was absolutely the energy where he was like, "Yeah." I'll have a better time alone at a concert than with a bad group, with the wrong group. - Yes. - I've walked away at Queens of the Stone Age. I was like, "Yeah." She was like, "My friends were all lame. I'm gonna go see this band at the sphere by myself and I'm gonna have a blast." And I was like, "Yeah, do it." Yeah, I was at a, it was in Arizona. I went and saw Queens of the Stone Age. And I was with a group of like five people. Two of them knew the band. Three of them weren't into it. And I just went like, "I was still drinking." But I was like, "I'm gonna go get a beer." And I got a beer and then I just went to the pit. And I was like, "This is what's up." - I'm here. - I'm here. Everyone is enjoying it. I had a better time. I never regrets, but I had a better time at Kendrick Lamar laying in the grass on my back far, far away from a barely hearing than I did with all those people around me. - To me people. - That was how, that's, that's sometimes you gotta, part of growing up is admitting what experience you want. And like I can see, it's like, but I kinda wanna be up there with those less people. I can jump. - Yeah, and you, like, when I was an Amsterdam on fucking truffles losing my shit at Pearl Jam, I went and stood against the back wall and enjoyed my stuff. - And what I need right now. And I was like, "This is what's up." I just watched the show. Everyone was like in front of me. I didn't feel like anyone was behind me. Like I was fogging with anybody. I just sat there and watched. I saw LCD at the tennis court, whatever it's called. Oh yeah, at a four sales, yeah. And I got good seats. And then, and then I was like trying it, but it was like kinda back. I was getting a little recognized, which I do not like on drugs. You know, don't like that. I don't like being watched. Yeah, when I'm on stuff. So I was like, and then I looked, I didn't really sell out the corners. And I'm like, I've seen him before. The light show there is cool. But like, I think I didn't jump around. So you go to like way, way cheaper tickets that in the moment are much better. And then you can jump and run up and down the stairs and like have a good time. You have some space. That's what it's about. It's about to have a fucking fun at concerts. 'Cause people lose that real quick and they go, "I'm with my group." You're kind of guessing what the vibe you'll want. Yeah. And it's what the drugs are gonna tell you to do. Also, sometimes there's fans of the people who can like a band too much. I wouldn't show. I know, you guys are, I wouldn't show, there's this known age at Barclays and I brought my buddy who doesn't know them, who loved it. He went and he was like, "What a great, live rock show." And we're sitting there waiting for the train. We're waiting for the subway to go back to Queens. And he's telling me how good of a tiny had. This girl overhears us. She's, head to toe when the Queens of the Stone Age shit. And she goes, "You don't know Queens of the Stone Age?" She goes, "No, I don't know, let's know him." She's like, "How could you not listen to him?" "Don't wanna do that." And I went, "Hey." It just got in. He's in. He's in. Stop. You're fucking good. It's just the first day, relax. You gotta first day. That's what I mean, where she was like doing that. She go, "Lady, chill the fuck out." Me and Matt Egger went to say, "I was trying forever to go see Billy Strings." Yeah. Billy Strings rules. Got into him. Billy Strings rules. Got into him. And then I was like trying to, and then I had a drunken, I, I had been trying for a while to get a Billy Strings, Danny Brown collaboration. Sick. And I had no dinner in America that could make that work. Yeah. So I keep pushing it. And there was some episode of Rogan's, me, Shane and Norman, and we're on there. And I'm bombed and I'm drinking beer out of a turned-over, like, top of a Christmas tree ornament. And I'm fucking it. And then I was like pushing it. And Rogan's like, "Who's Billy Strings?" I got fun, Matt. I was like, "Busher's fucking rules!" Yeah. Yeah. I do that with Sturgeon, man. I'll get Matt up with people, no, Sturgeon, Simpson, where I'll be like, "Well, he doesn't go by Sturgeon Simpson right now. He goes, "By Johnny Blue Skies, he's Johnny Blue Skies. I mean, you need to fucking look him up." But I think that's a part of fandom that I think we've taken too far with like streaming in social media and shit, is you could be too big of a fan that it turns off other people. All right. So I know I wasn't the biggest fan. I just like what I like. Exactly. And so I'm trying to find a time to see him and then he's going to be an awesome one I'm there. And I'm like, "Oh, sick." And I'm like, "Oh, no. I have shows at night." Sure. And I guess somebody showed him that. They made a clip of that. And he followed me. I was like, "No way." And I was like, "Hey, dude, you're shit is so good. You should try to find Danny Brown. I think you guys would do a great." And he goes, "Oh, check him out." And I'm like, "Yeah, I've been trying to find a time." And he goes, "Anytime, man." Which I'm like, "Anytime means, what does any time mean?" It means it's a specific time. But it means do I get free tickets? Yeah. That is great. Or do I hit you up again? Yeah. Because I can hit you up. I don't get it now. So I tried it. So he played Fort Worth, which is the best city in Texas. The day before I was in Austin doing my shows. Okay. So I was like, "Hey, can I come?" And it goes, "Got your tickets." Great. Great. Great. So then we got our seats. But we think we had all access passes. We're on mushrooms. Oh, boy. Me and Matt Edgar. You know that? Yeah. And then we were like to the lady, we're like, "Hey, can we go in there?" And she goes, "We got these great seats." I'm like, "I know." But like, these guys suck. Yeah. I want to jam. Can we go in there? See where we were talking about the roast. She goes, "Let me ask." And she goes, "Yeah, it's all access." I'm like, "Fuck yeah." And we go in there. There's some guy who's so fucked up who was like, "Found out it's our first time." And he goes, "Oh, bro." And he was so cute, he was like coaching us through it so he goes, "Okay, so when he played this into this, that was really big." And he was like, "Okay." And then later, we're like, "That's what I do at Krisie's Stonehenge Council to a Katie." I go, "You got to understand? They haven't played Mexico alive that I've seen in like five years." He's not going to dust in the bag. He don't expect him to. But that's good. And he goes, "Hey, this was about DMTU. You should get it." And I was like, "Okay, cool." And then I found all these looks that were dancing. Here's a whole walk section. Great. And it was like so fun. And so we're like, "Let's not get too fucked up because there is a non-zero chance that we get invited back afterwards to say hi." I do with Danny all the time. I brought Simon's in there. It's his favorite musician. That's great. Didn't know that. I knew he liked him. And he goes back, I'm like, "Hey, Danny. I've gotten to be friends with him." You sure? It helps that I'm not a rap fan, so I could be cool. Yeah. But, and I'm like, "Here's my friend, Daniel." I love that. I'm like, "Oh. Anyway." He likes you. Yeah. But. And so I'm like, there's a non-zero chance that we're going to meet him, so we shouldn't get too fucked up, so this is more We're tripping enough and we're like wild and he's sober, but it's like oh just like LCD They play a song for everybody sure for the drunks for the Molly heads in the mushroom people for the weed heads Yeah for the somers. There's something for each of them. Yeah, and Billy does it - there's something for the date night people They're just drinking some wine jam, but there's definitely some shit for mushrooms. I mean he was a method I might be a song or two for meth. I couldn't relate But everyone will like it all but you'll like it on another level. Yeah So I saw LCD the time we went when Vita was held up by the crowd Yeah, it was crazy. I saw on the next day just on just on just some weed and I'm like other playing songs for this There's an experience with just the pot heads and yesterday for the for the Molly out there's understanding your crowd. There was also that Michelle's like they spoke through that Ah the disco ball the disco ball. They're talking through it. I am there. They are me. He is us. We took I mean we took a heavy dose When we saw LCD sounds as we did mushrooms and Molly and it was a night they don't tell the next step. I did a bonfire I did a white AWD and a bonfire you can find it I pissed nine times during the bonfire episode wow because I was up for two days So this is like you're going to pee again, and I was like yes, yes again. Oh, yeah, I'm a good for you. Yes So this is moment. We're like tripping out or whatever and then we both had the same realization We're like looked at each other and like he would not mind if we're too fucked up That's right. He would not he would love it if we got back there like this He'd be like yeah, dude comes it down. Yeah, that is fun. Yeah, that is very fun going like he'd be proud of Yeah, and all the people tell us about it such a family thing. Yeah, I think he's even way bigger now But yeah music is music is still got that and I think comedy has that to a certain extent of like there is a fun part of that Old record store culture of like I don't know this I'm going in and someone goes Hey, you should like this. They're into this. They do this dad had a great thing doing that string cheese incident All of them have that like you watching a whole night at the commerce store in the old days and you had a guy there telling you like So this guy used to be on he was like like I go senator now. He's yeah Yeah, I'm like again. Oh really or like hey, this guy's like ultimate He's like he's gonna go hard understand. He's joking It's my favorite thing to do when people visit New York and they're like one of my close friends and they come with me to the seller I'm like you got to watch this guy because this guy does this and he does this is like oh he'll crush once every eight times Yeah, I'm six and do okay, and I'll leave him in the showroom and they like come back in and check in with them and they'd be like I like that second guy And you go that guy's the best you have the best taste Yeah, it's great being a fan rules. Just don't be too much of a thing let people find it now people find it great way Arche fear you're a true mench. Oh, yeah, I love you. I missed you a lot. I thought about you on this travel Yeah, man, I was I was mad when I opened my WhatsApp and miss our time to connect. Oh, yeah You'd send one every five months, but you're back. Yeah, um check out the end. It is. Oh, we gotta say it Oh, we gotta say it all we made a TV show it made a TV show called the end. What does it remind you of? I can't say it, but you can't It reminds me of this is not happening. Okay, great. It's legally he made that connection. I made that connection already did not but a You know, it's everybody that loves Ari came out and told the story yours was so funny Well, I got into mine you dig every years. I said I didn't have a story. I didn't have anything worked out Shane was doing it Shane was like come on dude. I don't have a story to go you have so many It's Shane's always the I didn't prepare for this guy and then he kills prepare and then we showed up What's funny is and people don't know this is when we filmed it? We're on a different episode But we were filming me and Shane after miss Pat who was murdering about Bob Sagitt coming over to her house Yeah talking about eating Shane and I Remembered that gay people gave each other monkey pox So Shane and I were backstage going we're doing the phone call to go hey Steven you get me monkey pox and it was making us laugh like Middle school we're gonna get in trouble in class hard to the point that people on your production staff are coming over and going Hey, you guys need to shut the fuck up And then Shane is like I use we're both bad, but and then we were like all right, let's go up But then it came out great. Well, thank you. Thank you. This is what you don't want a network saying Hey, what are you gonna say? I need to see everything sure you go you want a comment going guys What if you think of something the moment go for it? It doesn't go though. Oh drop it But that was such a funny through line. You're so funny And you guys pretty much told box two separate stories together ripped off each other Yeah, and it was like I knew some people's favorite. Oh, that's great Well, but we had we had like a lot of fun being like oh, yeah, and I got to you know He was like good at football and I sucked so it's always fun to be like this now bad I sucked at football and he's like that's crazy. I sucked slightly after you It was it was fucking great, but you guys are on it's everyone's a one hour episode you guys are on Ruminations of what I used to suck. Yeah, so one oh six. They're not in any order. They're not but check it out It is great. You got fucking Nate. You got list. You got Bobby. You got big J You got I mean big J tells the armageddon story, which I love that's my my favorite when I was like when I was like dust That shit off man. I like got a show coming and I want you to that and the list one can you see it? Yeah list it Can you picture? I'm talking about so good. And Bobby's was phenomenal. Miss Pats was great Pats was great. I watched like a bunch of people record you shot it beautifully at the box Thank you shout out to Eric Abrams. He was a part of it right. He's the best director and comedy. He just I was Sorry, I was just yeah, but I was hanging out with him and I was telling him like it was just fucking great Go check out the end if you want to just get that episode. It's six bucks If you get all of them there each an hour Then it ends up being about four bucks each per hour and then also I don't know if you know this there's a pro law We made bridge the gap. It's free not free for me, but free to get it bridges the gap from that old show Would you call it? This is not happening to the new show the end and what happened and why it's in your name And just why I'm bringing it back and I tried to have a thing of like the show wasn't just what you saw film the show Was all these live moments. Yeah for me anyway my memories of the show were equal Miss Pat telling me that thing about Bob Sagitt was like that. I guess we filmed it, but Could it it's actually a live show and so I had this thing of like all the my favorite moments that I remember and Just an little homage and you're in there on one of them. Yeah, which is Which is we had a mushroom episode in Montreal? Yeah on Shroomfest Yeah, and we're all supposed to take mushrooms and everything like that JFL except the two of us Everyone bailed he was the midnight show and he went here's what's gonna happen We're gonna eat mushrooms and they're gonna do the show and I was like tell my stories maybe I was like fuck yes And then I ate the mushrooms before while the show previously was going on And then I was hiding a smoked a couple joints and I'm kicking it and I'm like ready and I'm starting to feel it And then already comes up to me wild-eyed full of mushrooms and he goes we're the only ones that did mushrooms Where do you want to go in the lineup? And I went why is anyone else doing mushrooms and you went? They bailed and I like can I go first should not have said that? And I was on mushrooms too much to know that say that and you went you can go first Yeah, I went first and it was going great until the light on the stair kicked in and then I fucking bombed yeah You're like having a blast and you're like Yeah, and it's but it was here. We're looking at the light. Don't what just it went on and I went that like I'm on and a guy went No, and then the light went on again and turned off and I went that light didn't go on and turn off and he went No, and then I was like why is everybody fuck with me? That's why and I was like No, where am I out of my story spiral and I was fucking it's so much fun until that moment So there's an homage in there to just one light bulb. Oh, yeah, great They're not like so in your face the homages There's a light bulb and that is you from that story freaked out in the book. Yeah, but check out the end Why am it why mhstudios.com? You can download or is your fear.com. It's easier to remember Irish fear.com the link is right there traffic, but guys this is the way We're kind of going around the system. Yeah with this self release. I know people are used to getting standing for free And I don't blame you for getting a little out about it, but it's about four bucks per hour It's like it's less than it. It's like four four movies long. Yeah, shit's changing. It's all touring and doing it yourself It's gonna be rental till a year after we stop selling it and then I'm gonna figure out a way to get everybody Download cards so that they can have it forever. I don't have that yet, but I'll look up You and I are like, we're way closer to the ticket buyers than the ticket sellers. Yes, you know, in the life That's good, so we're like we understand your plight. So thank you. It's great. I'm so glad you did it It was very fun. It was very fun. I was I was like I don't have anything and then after I did it Shane was like that was so fun If you want to test just their episode and get the not the rest, but you get a disc you get too free if you get five So do that, but if you want to test it starts with Tollamash great then Sam talent great who's a lot of people's favorite story He's my favorite Bobby Kelly great. There's a lot of people's favorite story and then you too. Yeah, it's fun It's just a very fun watch the end rshphere.com. Yeah, take a fuck look it. Yeah, thanks. I love you, man All right, I love both you guys. We love you too. Yeah, we're big fans. We're glad you're back in the country. We're fucking bag of mulch You