Nick Kroll Convinced Netflix to Air Animated Animal Sex | 2 Bears, 1 Cave

100% It's crazy to me First of all how hard animated is because I You know, it's like we are in love with a certain Homer Simpson Sure because and then when you watch the old Homer Simpson, you're like, dude, what the fuck is that? Drangle and that's it. Yeah, he's just really angry at first. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, it's like super pissed Yeah, it wasn't the the lovable dope. No, and it takes time and it takes time and shows and and it's not even shows It's just the landscape of it Attention is such that you can't you don't have that time and there's not that money to like really let something become itself It has to be a come itself very quickly and successful But having done loudmouth and now the new series We were on run open season not open season, but I love if we made promote both shows as loud mouth and Open season He always does that. So guys get Was it mating season is it's mating season and big mouth and I was a lot better Wait, so I was in so I watched I watched five episodes this morning And I said I'm having the crawl and they go and see promoting loud big mouth Yeah, and I said no, he's got a new show called open mating season and then they said god I fucking love big mouth and and my trainer and his girlfriend who are standing at our house We're like I love the characters I love that and then they've married because you're what how many seasons a big mouth? We did eight seasons a big mouth. You've given an audience time to fall in love with the animated character Yeah, and now they're tethered to the hormone monster whatever, right? Who isn't and and then you introduce new characters and that you got to give them time to fall in love with them Yeah, well, and so it's such a it's so much harder than just presenting Nick Crowe who we know does that make sense? Oh, of course But I feel like One the only other person called loudmouth is Andrew Goldberg who I created the show with his dad Michael Goldberg Who is more like any of the characters in real life his Andrews dad? It's the Richard kind in the voice and he's just like the funniest, but He called the show Loudmouth like his own so he was like I'm excited for Loudmouth and he had t-shirts That's a loudmouth on it with like a budget version of each of our characters drawings Like he got him pirated like he hit it and that's the only person who's called it loudmouth So you're in good company And but I do think it's it is the challenge of it But I think in specifically animation the reason we do love like Homer and and all of like Whatever the shows that people fall in love with South Park or Family Guy or any of those shows is because Animation the process the other side of it the process lets you Polish and fine tune and really like Think about the stories you're telling or the fucking jokes you're telling because you have so many steps to Hit it and get it right like when you guys are doing your shows Like you hope you get on the day and you hope you can figure it out in the edit, right? Yeah, yeah with animation you have like a animatic like a black and white sort of rough draft of it So you get to screen it do you have a radio play before that where you listen to the whole thing and be like These jokes are not working this storyline is not working radio play radio plays like a podcast It's literally like the scripted podcast like yeah only the audio of it and you can then go in and fucking Tighten it up and then there's the the color screening at that point you really get to be like Okay, what does it look like and you get to hopefully get time to rewrite and super dialed in so it's dialed in It's why I think we also love like animated movies that are like the classics that our families our kids fall in love because Those things take years to make you always want to do Like a spin-off up because like a lot of people who do animation are like god. It's I'm so glad to be done Yes with all the the time commitment. Yes doing animation But you obviously love it, right? I love it and I've got incredible partners who who make it their Like in full-time every day all day job So like like burr. I feel like bill always was like it's fucking show. I'm losing money Yeah, you know what I mean like he was finally back on the road makes him fucking money He's always like yeah, yeah, which which I get because he was you know You're you have to be so but my partners are so I haven't heard him celebrate a lot of things though How so fine? I like to blow out a fucking router the other day. Yeah But I so I love I You're happy though you were happy like well I was like I was doing it the big mouth was really story about me and my friend growing up was like based on me My buddy Andrews was like my very personal like autobiographical story of a a tiny little dick kid and That was like a late bloomer and Andrew was a very early bloomer So he had puberty hard and early and I was late and so it was really about us and then we because we had eight seasons And we were on Netflix at that moment when there wasn't a ton of other content and we could really kind of It really come in and be like and people like oh shit and they're and they gave us completely Complete creative Freedom to and really push it. So when we we we we were lucky to come in at that moment So I think it's hard to figure out how to make something that A ton of people will tune in for immediately and stick around for yeah, especially in that you know in that way Like specials or your guys shows like it's you you've built in this particular Audience that is coming with you guys to watch the stuff you make But when you are making like a random animated show it is harder to kind of like Mean make sure that you get get an audience to pay attention. Yeah, but big mouth. I remember You know, you think you think you got a little swag or you're like wow my fucking special is number one for like Two week top 10 for two weeks three weeks and then big mouth was number one for like a month And I was like what the fuck I remember I remember like when I I never really paid attention to the trending And then the year I did big mouth came out right after my special and it was And then I was like god damn and then my daughters were both wild fans like everyone was a fucking huge fan that I show This shows so good man. Thank you. Yeah, it's so good and I you know, I haven't I've been really angry at comedies lately because we were hearing it downstairs. Yeah, yeah Yeah, and I'll be very candid this I can I I think the idea that we no longer shoot on film I feel like now writers don't put it on the paper and they go you know when we get there Let's just you know free ball it loose and then there was a generation of actor who was good at it right really good at it Donahill is the greatest Vince Vaughn the greatest that ever fucking lived and then there's a bunch of Hacks, I don't know I'm gonna get angry cuz I know just wait. Let's just name names if we're gonna do the pod let's fucking name some name Uh the fucking that movie made me so okay edit the name out, but but but I'm sitting there watching what it seems like a director and writer didn't do their job And now they're like hey, you're talented. Can you improv a bunch of shit and then I go it's not great It's not great and then when I watch and when I watched your show I was just telling you and there's a list of things I loved in your show But the one that made me giggle out loud when he's like We're gonna roleplay as humans and I was like I was in my head. I'm a get ready to do I'm in the gym. I'm get ready to bench And oh, what's your wife? I password. I mean, it's just but it's like so it's so well written And like I feel like that is the where where people are dropping the ball these days is they're not putting it on the paper And with animated you have to put it on the paper. Yeah, yeah, I mean, I think that so this new show is it's it's called Open what is it called is it open season or it's called mating season? Open mating season. Yeah, that's season two They're all in open relationship. By the way, I did that to Sandler the worst. I've ever done it to anyone in my life Were you like my favorite movie is Billy Madison? Did it know a bit a happy Madison? Did you say no? It's better. It's better Oh, it's I said I really liked your movie precious gems. Oh And he was like thanks That's a dare though. And I said the other day I tried to get my daughters to watch Billy Madison. Uh huh. No, no happy Madison And he was like, and I was like, hey man, do you have Netflix? He was like, I do and I have not spoken to him since until yesterday. He's a sweetest guy. Yeah, yeah You're fucking like weren't you just in his the new movie? I'm in his that yeah the movie roommates that it's it's Sadie his daughter and this girl Chloe East It's very funny. It's like a hard funny like hard talk about a like a Genuinely like hard laughs movie about like to toxic college roommates. I saw the trailer. I like it's funny It's got like the two of the writer SNL rotors. It's really funny But I but the thing with mating season is we it's the show is basically it's mating season It's like animals living I'll take it from here. I'll take it from here and Tom you haven't watched it. Yeah The bear who I love falls asleep oversleeps his his I've had a nation and loses this chick and at a certain point and what I fucking love is everyone starts coming together as you get to like later in the season But they're all kind of looking for something and they're all looking for love and they're all experimenting and it's very wide open and and There's brilliant parts in it where I wondered if you wrote from your heart when the lesbians are getting together And they're hunting for truffles. Yeah, you said you're operating out of us out of a out of a What is a you're not in it? in a life of abundance, do you know what I'm talking about? Is that something you believe in? 'Cause I saw that and I went, that seems like a Nick thing. You never seem like you operate out of scarcity. You always seem like you operate about abundance. 'Cause you're always working, you're always creating. You never have a fearful like what's next. You always kinda like, you're doing something cool. - Yeah. Well, that's a nice observation to make. And I am right now more than most operating out of a place for abundance. 'Cause I've had, frankly, abundance my whole life. So it's not as challenging for me to like, but I think there are plenty of people who have a ton who do not operate from that place. - Yeah. - So I definitely, but I truly feel right now, slightly like I am being like, wow, especially at a time when our business is changing and they're not everybody has the opportunities that we have and people who we came up, you know what I mean? Like it's gotten, everything's getting tighter. - Tighter, yeah. - So, but, so if you do have it, if you get to make stuff, like what a fucking privilege, you know what I mean? Like what a true, so I am feeling that particularly right now and then also like, yeah, also probably, I think it's funny to talk that way too a little bit. - Well, it's so, I operate, I constantly operate out of scarcity. - Yeah. - I have my whole life. - Is that how you've been your whole life? - By the way, yeah, and I was, I mean, I listened, I watched your show in bed, in the hot tub, making breakfast, I watched it all end in the gym, I've been watching it all morning, so it's really on my head, but I was in the hot tub thinking I have a life of abundance, but why is it that I see scarcity? And I, then I thought, wow, holy shit, I wonder, 'cause I know you're smarter than me and probably as smart as Tom. But like, did you, when you make something like this, are you thinking, are you thinking just laughs? Are you thinking bigger picture? - Oh, yeah, I mean, I think we learned from Big Mouth that we are trying to do on mating season. I think, I hope successfully is that it's like big laughs and then big emotions, like that's the game. - Yeah, you gotta have both. - You gotta have both for them to really sing, especially if what we learned on Big Mouth is like, we could get so fucking dirty and dark and blue, but that only worked really well if we also were selling the real emotional reality of it, for our characters and this show, for the same thing. I think that's like sort of what we have tried to, that's always the magic formula though, I think. - I think so. - For a film, TV, and any storytelling, like, especially if you're doing comedy, if you leave out emotion, it'll never resonate as much. - It just doesn't work right. - It like, you keep, you wanna be like, it's just, let's just make it fucking funny and dutter down, I believe that. - Well, it sticks, 'cause like, I think if you can have like a really funny joke, people are like, that was hilarious. - Yes. - But if you, like even on stage, right, you could do like a really funny joke and people are like, that was really funny joke. But then the comic goes up there who like, talks about something real life. - Yeah. - And has maybe like, it's funny too, but the part about connecting really connects with the audience, the audience remembers that guy. - Of course. Well, I was watching you the other night, and you were doing a couple, a joke about your mom and a joke about your kid. And they're both like, you're like, oh, he's joking around here, but you feel the emotional like, realities of it, which makes the joke that much more potent to me. - Right, right. - You know? And, but you're saying fucking wild shit. But I think that speaks to some emotion. That's why I was like watching. I was like, man, I'm doing impressions of fucking navigation apps. - You, you know what I mean, like, yeah. - You also brought me up as Jeffrey Epstein. - Yeah, I did bring him up, specifically. - Welcome to the mystery boys. - I'm Kirby's Dres White Claus Miss. Dunston Hudo. We're here to gate your fourth eye. - Three eye atlas. - JFK's doctor. - Palmas. - Hitler's doctor. - MK Ultra. - Drain of Crown. - Elsa Crowley. - You ain't heard the mystery boys get to modeling. - I didn't see one dick in those catacombs and I looked everywhere. - Well, this is the show, guys. I hope that your mom's house is happy. - I've always been afraid to invest money. I've always been the guy that, I feel like I get money, I just shove it in my pocket, but that's not the way you make money. So many of us only focus on where our money is today. Right now, acorns is a financial wellness app that cares about where your money is going tomorrow and that's how you make money. Acorns is a smart way to give your money a chance to grow. Acorns is easy. You can sign up in minutes and start automatically investing your spare money even if all you've got to spare change. 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Tom wants you to tell it. - Oh my God. - Please. - Okay. - Oh wait, before I do. - No. - No, I'm gonna tell it. - Wait. - But how did it go with Sandler? - I'm like, not as good as Nick, but good. (laughing) - This is the way-- - But just have an interaction. - So wait, hold on. So the thing that made me say that operate, you operate out of a place of abundance, as I watched you walk in to that group picture with Sandler. And you were very, you're so good at feeling like you belong. Like watching, like, and I think I give off that energy and I think people think, Bert feels comfortable in his skin. But there is a part of me that in that moment, you're like, where will I sit? - Of course. - Well, how do I get to a place? - I mean, I'm happy to walk through for the next 45 minutes, the dynamics of finding where we were gonna all sit and be, enter into that picture. 'Cause it is, it's like, it is the thing. - I sit down, I watch you walk in with Sandler and I'm like, - Well, so, but here's the reality of that. And so this is the Serrano's broadest, everybody in comedy is at this thing. Like, everybody goes to this particular thing. It is the most concentrated version of comedy, the current people who are successful in comedy in one space at one time. You have to be a comedian to really appreciate it. I said to my trainer, if you had been there, you wouldn't have gotten it because there's a lot of people you wouldn't know. You wouldn't. But we know every single one of them and we know how important every single one is and to make it even more specific, there are roughly four people there that are the reason the majority of us are doing quality. So yeah, like, so Eddie Murphy's there, David Letterman's there. John Stewart. John Stewart's there. Yeah, Seinfeld, Sandler, Christopher. I mean, it's like Enchipel and everybody else. So, but like, so I roll in late to the, I see the picture happening and I'm sort of like slowly making my am. So I'm walking in with like a Santino and Ronnie Chang and then and then Louis is behind us and we're we're in the last like the stands are basically full at this point. So I'm standing in the way back, you know, it's like, it's like this. It's like a, right? Like it's a tiny, tiny little amphitheater, right? Or like three or four rows and and then there's the middle section. So I'm walking up and I'm like, I think I can see the lens and I was sort of like, that's okay. If this picture is like, I'm just like in the deepest of background, just sort of like a barely seen face because I operating from a place of abundance. Like I'm like, I think I'm okay. Like no matter where I am in this picture. And then eventually, like a Louis peels off and then I'm sort of like, I'm about to climb the tree. I'm like, or will I be the guy who climbs the tree? Yeah. And that would be funny. Or I'll be the guy who climbs the tree and falls and breaks his back at the fucking. Which would be amazing, which would be an amazing, unbelievable story. I know. But I'm, I'm, I'm not currently paying for insurance. So I just got to fun me. It's incredible. Please start it regardless. So I then I'm like, I'm like, looking around and someone's like, oh, you can, they're actually want people up front. So I then go around front and then I see Sandler by chance, who's like, so then we say hi and then we walk in and it looks like we're like walking in together. Yeah, yeah. But I was, I saw him like 10 seconds before. It's so funny. The backstory your brain says. I go, yeah, yeah, they just did that movie together and I was like, God, man, I literally, I was like, he just is so cool. He just, Nick just kind of rolls in and he always like, I go, I wonder what they were talking in my head because I rolled in. I saw Tom already had a seat or a place in the stands and I was like, the stands were packed and I was like, oh, I'm, no, I don't know if I'll be in this picture. I couldn't find. I was looking for you and I was looking for, I was like, is he your support? Well, it's just like it was overwhelming. Yeah. To be standing. I was looking to stand next to him. 100% and then they grabbed me and they're like, oh, we want you right here. And I was like, oh, fuck, they're going to want me to take my shirt off for something, which I have to say the year before two years before they had said, hey, will you jump in the pool? And I was like, I was like, yes, obviously I'll do it. I'll do whatever you guys want. But you got to understand there's a lot of ego in this room. And I don't want to be the one to try to try to draw focus right out of this room. Yeah. And so I ended up getting in the pool and fucking God bless, Chappelle for like having my back as I did it because you could see he goes rearing like, oh, oh, she's going to get in the pool and then Chappelle the best. He's a goddamn rock star. Of course, she's getting the pool. Yeah. And then I was like, thank you, Dave. And yeah, Tom and I were talking shit about you while that was happening. That's that one. Yeah. Yeah. I again, I remember. So this, it's this, I remember, uh, yeah, this picture, it's so funny to be. I look fucking jack. Oh, right. Serandos put his legs in the pool. I think in us and stewards. I mean, it's like, you look great. I look great. Dude, whatever tanning salon, whatever tanning salon, you're going to or whatever you're doing. So great. I was a spray tan for real. What's it? Yeah, really well. I was going through a spray tan phase. I'm going through a pretzel face right now. But so and that, by the way, I have to be honest with you. Double the comedians this year. Yeah. Yeah. Without a doubt. Well, because every comedian who wasn't there looked at that picture. I'm like, I want to fucking be there. I'm not there. You're not there. I couldn't, I couldn't be in town for that. Yeah, it, uh, but I, I, um, and then I ended up sitting it. So just to, so then, so I'm walking up a sandwich and then they're like, Adam, please come this way to go sit like, you know, with touch of what I was like, of course. And so then I'm, I just like, I sort of literally, there's like a tiny amount of space where I just sit down front and then Chappelle sits next to me. And then, you know what I mean? So you're just like, I'm like, oh, you know, as you've tried to figure out like where you live and all this stuff. As soon as Chappelle's next to you, like, I like my seat. You're just like, I guess this is, you know, but all, it's just like all of it. It's all of it at once. Yeah. And I think, you know, it's, and it's so funny. I mean, I saw Letterman. Yeah. Who I know, a tiny bed and it said hello to him. And he, I walk up and say, hi, and he just looks at me goes, inner species romance. And I was like, I just had no idea what he was referencing. Yeah. And only later I went back to the writer's room. And they were like, I think he was talking about mating season 100%, 100%, which I had truly did not, because, you know, because I just pictured Letterman being able to say a truly random, yeah, bizarre thing to deal with whatever interaction he's about to have. Yes. This is going to be a good build to the worst story you've ever heard in your entire life. And please make sure you have my phone so we can post pictures of the visual of Tom bombing the best. You're ruining it. I'm not even close. You're ruining it. Okay. So hold on, no, no, no, no, no, what's build to you? Yeah. Well, so, so first I have to start with like almost 20 years ago at the height of Chappelle Show fame. I did a tour with Charlie Murphy. Oh, wow. He's underselling this, by the way. I'm telling and I'm setting up the end Joe Rogan. Yeah, yeah. But Charlie's the key Charlie Murphy Joe Rogan and John Heffern are on the real men of comedy tour. Uh-huh. The Max and Bud Light real men of sure. Sure. Sure. I was on the axe body. Break comedy tour. It's not a big deal. So I do a couple dates. And I think the last night is in Phoenix. And I'm, I'm just doing three minutes, by the way. Three. You're on the road doing three minutes. Three cold. You go out first and I open. And after that, that Phoenix show Charlie, I'm, and I'm like, hello, you know, just keeping to yourself really, you know, staying out of the way. Yeah. Charlie's like, he's like, he's like, funny shit. And he's like, you want to come to dinner? And I'm like, what? Yeah. Yeah. He's like, I come, come now. Let's go to dinner. So the show's still going on. I go to dinner with him. We go to a sushi spot. He's like, I don't, I like sushi, but I don't know what to order. You know, he's like, I'm kind of fish like it. I'm like, I'll handle it. So I order all the, you know, Hamachi and tuna and everything. He's like, how do you know the difference between, what's the difference between like dark red tuna and the light red? I'm like, I don't know, but I'm going to find out. I'm going to find out, but I'll order the shit out of it for you. So we order, we look at two hour dinner. And he's the best, right? And at one point, at dinner, he goes, may I ask you something, man? He goes, do you think Oscar de la Hoya could whoopee ass? I'm like, I go, yeah. It's a world class champion boxer. Yeah, he goes, right? I go, 100%. Oscar de la Hoya could what my ass? He goes, yeah, you know who thinks he could whoopee's ass? And I go, he goes, Keith Sweat, like the R&B singer. He's like, he's like, yeah, he goes, he thinks he's too pretty. I go, Keith Sweat wouldn't know that it started and it would be over after the whole fuck him up. We go on about this for a while. So yesterday, I'm at this, hold on, I'm at this thing and I see Chris. And I know Chris. Sure. So he's always very, really nice to me. And always like, overly nice. Gas is me up. Very, really, really cool. So I just say hello to Chris. Chris says, you know, casually. He's like, talks me a little bit. He goes, Eddie, Tom, and I say, hello, that's it. Yeah. And I should have walked away. Yes. Chris leaves, like he just stands over here. So now I'm standing there with Eddie. And I'm just like, I should, hold on, I should set this part up. I always imagine that if I had ever meet Eddie Murphy, that I would tell him this story about his brother, would you do the impression of, no, not impression, not impression, just like, tell the story. And I always imagined that he would love this story. So that's a fantasy of that. He was, of course. Well, I tell him not with the fish detail. Sure. I tell him about that whole whole stuff. And he's, he's like, looking at me. And I tell him that he goes, is that the end of the story? Do you know what I said next? I said, no, we kept having dinner. He was like, and then I, I started to stammer. I was like, I'm holding a glass. I was like, we kept eating though. And then he's like, and then he laughed. But he laughed because he saw me dying. Right. Right. And then he goes, yeah, yeah, we used to do that a lot. We used to talk about who's asked we could kick. Oh, that, that was like a big point of conversation. That was a big point of conversation. What's up? Are you in Austin? Are you visiting Austin? Do you live in Austin? Well, I welcome you to please come check out Chicho Bomba. That is the Italian bakery that I have opened in Austin. We are now at three locations. We're at the fairground food hall underneath the Wells Fargo building downtown. 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Rules and restrictions may apply. But when he said, "Is that the end of the story?" You know, if there was been a camera on me at that time. Oh, there was. There was. It was right after that. So cut to jelly roll going, "Dude, your boy's talking to Eddie Murphy." Now, I always, like, it seems like Andrew Schultz always has someone filming him do everything. And I always thought that was cool, but I don't have that. And so I'm like, "Oh, I'll do that for Tom." So I started taking pictures of Tom and I was like, "Oh, I'll get this." And then Tom comes over and goes, "That looks so great." And he goes, "I just bombed in front of Eddie Murphy." And this is the app where you're bombing in front of Jerry as well. Jerry comes up after five. Okay, great. There's the picture of Tom where he looks at me, like, "Help." Yeah, yeah. That's coming up. This is this is when I'm processing what happened the next photo. This is Tom going there. Oh, God. Yeah, take a sip. Just take a sip. What else? Dude, that's brutal. What's happening here? If I could have described it, it's that Eddie is so glad that Jerry is here to get him out of talking to me. Yes. You know what I mean? Of course. But he sees Jerry. Well, that's what that party part of that party is. It's like, how long do I talk to these guys? Yeah. Before I can figure out how to get myself out of it so it doesn't go badly. The other thing that I was thinking about after I was telling this story to people was that I'm normally so good at meeting like very famous people. And I realized what happened was that normally when I meet someone very famous, there's not anything, I'm not emotionally charged with it. I didn't idolize them. Yeah. Even if they're very famous. Yeah. Except with him I did. Sure. And I lost my sense of self and like my judgment. And I was like, I got a funny story for you. And he was like, is that the end of the story? But it is a funny story. Yeah. Do you think you delivered it badly because you were in your head from the jump? Like you were probably. Probably. And you're like, you do a couple spots at a night. You like, you're first when you're just not acclimated. And it kind of is like, and then you I also think I just my other mistake was just deciding to just I got like to just I got to tell you something like it wasn't a natural way right. Like into the story. But it is like it is what he deals with all day every day, which is like here is my personal way into your like greatness. In some way or other. Yeah. And for Eddie's daughter is in roommates, the Sandler movie. And I was thinking to that was like, why didn't I go up to him and say to him? See that would have been a great way. Because I think people's kids also. I mean, this is like if we're getting we'll see what I actually want to use of this of my actual weasley dynamics. No, that's a great way in. Right. And so in my head, I'm like, you bombed. I'm like, I mean, I should have said, I'm yeah. I mean, everybody was talking about how you bombed. I should have been like, I was in a movie with your daughter. And then he'd be like, Oh, really? And I was like, actually, you know, also, I went out with your brother one time. Yeah, right. That's the follow. I hit dingers yesterday. Did you? Oh, 100%. What did you? Oh, I mean, I could not have been better. I mean, Seinfeld. This is the best one. Okay. Well, let's just start with Sandler, which was a fucking solid truck with the fucking fence. The left field of stumbles. I ran third clear fucking home run and run out of chest bump. Sandler just sits down and he goes, Hey, hey, bird. Hey, buddy. How you doing? I was like, Hey, he's like good to see you in an out clean, clean, clean. We're probably got a project lined up for the fall. And so the best one of the Chris rock, Chris rock taller than I thought. Yeah. Honestly, I think six foot with the hair. Yeah. And I turn around and I say, Hey, Chris, I'm Bert Christy goes, Bert, I know who you are. I was like probably opening for him next year. And then we do it three minutes. Oh, easy, easy, tight three, tight three. My three was an impression of a black guy in the middle like Tom does so well. The best one, Jerry Seinfeld. So a long time ago, I've always, I'm always fascinated. And I don't know if it, I don't know why I do it, but I'm always fascinated by the fact that I am in in an industry, I'm doing pretty well in an industry where my heroes live. Yeah. And I wonder if they know who I am. I've always wondered, does like Jerry Seinfeld know who I am? Does Chris rock know who I am? Does anyone know who I am? Or am I still operating in a vacuum like when I was an open-micro because it feels like that in real life. So we pontifficated one time on the podcast, whether or not Jerry Seinfeld knew who I was. And Tom's like, of course, he knows who he was. I don't think he does. I go, Jerry lives and who knows what I fucking said, right? Who knows to him? On a podcast. On a podcast. So I'm sitting down and I feel a hand on my shoulder and I turn around and it's Seinfeld and he goes, Bert, I know who you are. And I went, what? And he goes, very funny. Someone sent me the clip of you talking about whether or not I know who you are. I didn't know who you are. I watched the clip. I know who you are. That's very, that's really good. That's fucking great. He is, he is a fascinating cross-section of North East America. Like the same way you look at Oasis and you're like, that's Manchester. Sure. You look at Jerry Seinfeld, tucked in white shirt, tapered in the back, Brooks Brothers jeans, sensible shoes. And you're like, oh, he looks like you could throw a football at Hianna Sport. That's interesting. I mean, I just think of him as a Jew. So it's hard for me to see it that way. The Kennedys weren't, you know, oh, you can't say, you can't say Jewish anymore. You can only say Jew. Oh, really? I thought it was the other way. No, they wanted a short and everybody decided it. I feel like that's not going to be well received. But I'm going to give it a shot. Why do you guys both say it? Just saying that you're going to, we're here with Nick and we're going to Jew him down. Oh, I want to use it about somebody else. Okay, go ahead. Stacey's a Jew. She collects cans around her office and I think it's very Jewish. I say, Jewie. Jewies even better. Oh, even better. Yeah. Yeah. We're even talking about Kanye being at the, no, he wasn't. The best, the best interaction I ever had was like two years ago. Cat Williams was there in what I could only describe as an evil cannibal outfit with a, with a fucking sheist on all bedazzled all white. Yeah. And he comes up and he goes, Christ, you know, rockstar motherfucker. And I was like, is it? I hope this is cat Williams. It was Lou Nell. I mean, I said hi to Lou Nell. Yeah. Yeah. And she'll, she'll hold on to your hand while you talk to her for the whole, you know, you shake hands with somebody and then it's over. She'll like, I was like, we're going to, we're going to keep holding hands with this whole interaction. And I'm thrilled about it. Yeah. She and I have the same eye lash technician. It's great. You do have great lashes. Thank you. Yeah. Thank you. Beautiful. Isn't it crazy how social media works? Lou Nell posted a picture of a sandwich like four years ago that I think about every time someone mentions you and Lou Nell, I think about this fish sandwich from Compton. They're really good. And I can't trigger her memory to tell her me where it's from. She goes, fish sandwich. Hi, that's so many fish sandwiches, Bert. You know, I spit them out. You really hit the again, and I love how many different black voices you guys are doing in the room today. I'm really enjoying it, but you hit a weird tone and tenor in the quality of her that really is Lunelle, like the, I'm really good about the literal color of it. Give me a, give me a dialect of black, like you can do Canadian, you go, okay, ready? I'll do, you do, you do Canadian really good. Thank you. And I'll do a black, like Southern black, Tom, where do you want to do your black? Any black you want. Any black. I mean, can I get like a, be ready for this? I want an old school Eddie Murphy black, that kind of he grew up with. The not, like, not early Eddie Murphy, but in fact, where he grew up in, like, New York city. In Long Island? Yeah. Long Island in the, like, late 60s. Cause I heard, I heard Patrice one time say about Eddie, I think it was Patrice, because we were going to go see Paul Mooney. Yeah. Patrice, like, you got to go see Paul Mooney. I was like, I don't really go fuck about Paul Mooney. I didn't know who it was. Yeah. And then Patrice, like, trust me. So we went and sat in Paul, see Paul Mooney has a bottle of champagne. He's destroying white people on stage with a bottle of champagne. And I'm looking at Patrice and I go, why are we here? And then all of a sudden they're, you know, Eddie Murphy's laugh. That was interesting. And that's actually one of the last seals still alive in the sea world. That's pretty. And I go, what? And he goes, this is Eddie Murphy's favorite comic. And I went, yeah. And then Patrice casually goes, he needs to update his black voice. Paul Mooney. Well, but Paul, you don't do, do you do Paul Mooney? You don't do a Paul Mooney. Of course I do. Hell, Nick, you're white man. That's pretty good. That's a good Paul Mooney. I'm, when did my impressions get so good? I could do a great Tim Dillon. It's not good. It's not good. Rogan voted for Trump. And his, yeah. Is, is Tim Dillon black or is he, yeah, you nailed that man. What was George sound like? No, hey, wait, wait, how did you, you're really good at impressions? Um, not my strong, I'm sort of more voices than impressed. You do a lot of voices. Do a lot of voices. Impressions, I'm okay. Yeah, but I feel like there's certain guys who like, you know, the people who are so good at it, it's like scientifically, they understand it, how to do something that like, I'm, you know, who's the best in our business had impressions? Like Frank Caliendo, Caliendo was like, he's amazing. Caliendo on the internet, finding Caliendo on the internet, talking about him, how he creates those voices. Like you are, it is like, wow, this is really, it's a, it's like getting to watch literally about how a magician does. You also find out though that like, it's not just the voice that they end up nailing. You got to speak the way the person would speak, like say the things they would say. Yes. That's what sells a good impression. Yeah. Because you're also writing there. You're writing their jokes as well. And it has to. He's amazing at it. Yeah. He's one of the funniest things he ever did. You know, like the sidebar funny things comics do are my favorite. Like Jim Norton, when I first went to the seller first time ever, I was like, I saw Jim Norton, I go, hey, how you doing, man, I'm Bert and he's like, hey, I'm Jim, that's how I'm a comic. Can I go, what's the bartender's name? He goes, Doug. And I went, hey, Doug. Doug, and he goes, louder, he's harder hearing, oh, Doug, Doug, because you got a shout out. I go, Doug, he goes, it's fucking Bill Asshole. And then Jim just walked away. But Frank Caliendo, one time we're doing radio and he goes, and then like, can you do an impression, everyone, I can do an impression, a bird. I can do an impression, a bird so good that he could fool his wife. And I was like, for real, he goes, call your wife on the phone, we're on radio. Call me and I go, hey, babe, and I, and he goes, and I go, hang on one second. And then I hand it and he goes, push his impact to me and I go, how you doing? Natalie, I was like, what, I just did an impression of myself, like he just did it like a heaven fucking, that's crazy. I should have told it to Eddie Murphy. Maybe like, is that the end of the story? This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. For some, some are their favorite season, travel picks up, kids are out of school, adventure is our focus this summer. Of others, juggling at all can be tough and can lead to over feeling overwhelmed and counting the minutes until the kids are back in school. And many worry they're wasting the days of sunshine. I have a propensity to take care of myself in the wrong way over the summer. 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Was Malini? Was Malini? That's what I said. When you first met Malini, was he that intonation? Hi, Nick. You know, we met in college, so I've known him forever, so it's hard to figure out. But he, I mean, from the moment I met him, I was like, this motherfucker is so funny that and he knew his voice already. He has then obviously fine-tuned it, but and he has found, I think with all the great standards. I was watching both of you guys, you see the like, okay, this is the song. You figure out your song and I think he's fine-tuned it, but it was, it was always some version of that. You know. Yeah. Can you do an impression of him? You know, weirdly, I can't. It's like, sort of, I don't do great impressions of my family, weirdly, like, I don't, you know what I mean? That's the opposite for me. I only do impressions. You do, yeah, yeah. Like, no, just like-- Do your dad do your dad. His dad's past. No. He was good at his dad. Rest in impression. Rest in impression. But my dad just had like a cadence that he's like, hey buddy, yeah, you're doing it sold out last night. That's real neat, you know? Uh-huh. Saw your car. Really, really super neat, pal. That's just how he talked. Yeah. So if I talk about him on stage, I can do an impression of him and you feel like you're doing another person. Yes. But like a famous person or something? I don't. Yeah. Yeah. I'm like, weirdly, I don't, I mean, I guess I do, but I think honestly, my impressions come more out in like my, in like Bigmouth, for example, it was, I have a, I had a mom and a dad and I had two sisters and a brother. They all end up, there's some version of them in there, but they're pretty, they ultimately felt pretty different versus me doing like, I will now do my father, my brother, my sister's or whatever, you know what I mean? And similarly, with millennia, I don't quite, I weirdly don't, like I almost like won't allow myself to lock into an impression of them. Yeah. Hey, pal, I heard your bond with Eddie Murphy. Hey, neat. Yeah. That's pretty neat. That's all right. Yeah. When you do this, when you do this impression, when you do the show, yeah, it's a mating season. Yeah. And you, your character, how close is that how close is that to you or do you find a variance of it in you? Oh, mating season is a little like, I'm doing a little like, I play like a dirty little raccoon. [BLANK_AUDIO] I have the smallest amount of a little something on it, but weirdly, it wanted to go big, but then there's probably Cooper doing rocket, raccoon, or whatever the guardians of the galaxy. So I was like, I didn't want it to get too close to other kinds of versions of that. And also, it's like you want these four friends to feel like they come from the same little world. But I'm a dirty little raccoon, ultimately. I'm just like a fusion. >> You always know you're going to be that? Did you entertain doing other animals? >> I've always been, I've just, truly my work has a lot of raccoons. They are a major theme and like, oh, hello, me and Melaney's thing. There's like a big raccoon theme. On Big Mouth, there's like a recurring raccoons that were like caters and stuff. And I just like, I love little raccoon hands and I love that and they're funny. And so when we were doing the show, we were like, all right, I'm going to do, I think it would be funny for me to be like Ray, just like a little fuck monster of a raccoon, you know. >> Like the first episode is me and Sarah Silverman is a skunk and we have like a dirty. >> That's Sarah Silverman? >> Can I, go ahead. I'm going. >> So we have like a dirty little one night stand and then we get caught in a copulatory tie. You know when like animals fucking then they can't separate. >> Yeah. >> It's so great. >> So they're facing different ways. And so, but our way and emotionally is that it's like, oh, they're, so then now he's going through the day with like a one night stand, it's like what happens when your one night stand won't leave. >> Yeah. >> You know what I mean? Like in the classic like friends. >> It's such a great. >> How I met your mother kind of. >> It's such a great comedic delivery because the raccoon shows up like as you deliver line you forget she's there. >> Yeah, and then she's sort of oxygen and she's like all of a sudden a part of all these other come. So it lives, it's very fun fucking doing that shit. But oh, the raccoon. >> Yeah, I mean, I love it, it's like I've always loved the night before we started doing table reads for this, for mating season. I was home with my two kids and my wife were sitting in the living room and there's like a little courtyard off the living room. And this raccoon just like walks down and just sits there and is looking at us. And I was like, hey, get the fuck out. Like yell it or I like get the fuck out of you know what I mean? He just didn't move at all. So I go outside, I'm like get, get, you know, and he will not budge. So I take a bunch of like kids tennis balls that I have. I'm like whipping them at the raccoon and he slowly kind of like walks away, like climbs up a tree just like a little bit and just keeps staring at me as I whip fucking tennis balls at him. And then he finally after like 15, 20 minutes, like finally like walks away. And I genuinely felt like I was visited by the like raccoon community to be like put some fucking respect on my knees. Yeah, yeah. Don't keep treating us. The way that. Yeah, be mindful. The black people are dealing with Jack Harlow right now, right? Right. Or your various impressions. Yeah. Oh, my impressions are so tight. Wait, hold on. Is he catching a little? Yeah. Hold on, motherfucker. Shit. Jack, what are you? What are you? I know impression at Jack Harlow. What is what happened with him? He he dressed he's dressing up as black people now and so he's kind of like dressing like Keith Sweat. Yeah, he really is before getting in a fight. They just catching on. Shaysay type in club, Shaysay, Jack Harlow. He put on this hat where this black chick's like, no, he need to get mace for that type in Jack Harlow mace. He need to get mace for that. I know what you doing, Jack Harlow. It's working for him. I guess, right? No. I've never listened to one of his songs. People are talking. I'm done talking shit about people. I love Jack Harlow. But you know, I talk shit about, I talk shit about people. What's, hold on. He's going to get, I'm going to mace the fuck out of his ass. This is, you got wife out here? Oh, this is. He got the car. Oh, fuck. I mean, just put in, stop the mace thing. Just do Jack Harlow. No. I'm going to mace the fuck out of him. We just want to see the image, dude. That's it. Oh, man. He wants a little. He got a little fucked up. Look at his hat. Is that what he's wearing? Yeah. No, he got me fucked up. Yeah. Don't trust me by him. Oh. Did you never remember? He looked, I mean, I was like, maybe like the mouse, a dung fan base might be a little pissed about it too. He's appropriating from that's a, that's, that's quite the way to wear that hat though. Yeah. I don't understand you. Either of you guys tuck your people who tuck their ears into their hat. I feel like there was maybe a period where you would have done that. I wish I could. You can't. No. But like, that's a real thing. Yeah. That seems like deeply uncomfortable to me to tuck your ear. Oh, man. Unless you got big, like, because unless you got big old ears, right? Yeah. I never occurred to me. You know that you can fix that now. I knew dudes in college had to get the ears pinned. Now they've just put, like, clips on people you can mold a child's ear to be perfect. Oh, really? At a certain age. Or you just put, like, buttons on, you know what I mean? You just snap them back. I snap them back. Yeah. Cause then you have the option to pull it out. Yeah, then you pop it out. It's nice to have that. I knew a girl who got her ears, like, fixed when she was, like, the pinned, like, she had big ears and they, like, pinned them when she was too little. She was, like, five or six. And so when she was 13, she was, like, beautiful, but she had these, like, tiny little ears because they'd never got to properly grow. Oh, my God. Watch the way I'm so good at maneuvering a conversation. Okay. I was talking to Demetri Martin yesterday, who's son is an amazing javelinist. A javelin in the state of Florida was outlawed because Michael Landon killed a man with a javelin in high school. Michael Landon has huge ears pulling Michael. That's why he grew his hair because his ears were fucking massive. That is, I don't know how I, I don't know where I'm, wait, I'm still, let's just take a second to be like, Michael Landon killed a man by throwing a javelin, like, like, a track and field meat or like, he was hunting him. He threw a javelin and a guy was like, excited, the guy is measuring if someone was like, what time is it? And looked at his watch and javelin went through his heart. Oh, shut up. Yeah. That's what I was told. Discess. So you don't believe this? I don't. Do we want to look that? I mean, Michael Landon ears first. Yeah. Michael Landon ears. So he had big old ears. Yeah. Did you guys watch the little house in the prairie? They're rebooting it. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Big ears. Yeah. We had massive ears. Oh, like, the black of my when he's little, like, he still have even like, I mean, he's still a fucking spoke show. He's good, man. Now type in Michael Landon javelin. Michael. That's crazy. And then he's there is Michael Landon killed a man in javelin. This is where you guys realize that I don't actually know how to read. Yeah. Just looking at him like, look at all those. Wait, does it say that? That's the according to Guinness Landon through a javelin 200 feet high in the high school and was off. I can't see where it says, he grew up in Florida, right? You can't see where it says. He doesn't say it. No, he doesn't say it. Wait. I didn't know that anything was outlawed in Florida. Like, that's a really good point. Right. It's the most chill state to do anything you want. I know. Yeah. You're like, go fucking. They're like, do you want dynamite? That's okay. You can keep it at your house. Hold on. It is crazy that I that he did throw javelin. Yeah. That is true. But there was a big part of the story where you're like, he killed a guy and it was outlawed. He threw a javelin and just remember this is like the past when there was like at most three sports. Yeah. So like, one of them was javelin and Michael Landon made it go away. Hold on. This is a story I remember from high school because I said, why don't we have Javelin? And so it's like, do you know the guy from Little Bear, out on the bird and go, Michael Landon? They go, he killed a man in the javelin. Wait. Go to Lincoln. Then he did throw fucking javelins. Yeah. Whoever your gym teacher was and what a blessing. Oh, are you confusing the fact that he's dead with that he killed someone? No, it said 1990. That's a late time to kill someone. Yeah. He wasn't 1991. He was 1991. Overshadowed by the O.J. Simpson. No, that was 90 later. I'm so nervous. Okay. Wait. Well, you said Florida. He's from Eugene, Oregon. He was competing. And he went to high school in Jersey. I'm actually dying here. He went to high school in Jersey, bro. Michael Landon? Yeah. He went to high school. I call him to high school in New Jersey. Yeah, but he was doing a field trip to Florida, it was the National, the Nationals who were in Florida. Yeah. That's great. What a cool thing to kill someone with because you go, a bird crash or murdered his wife with javelin. Everyone assumes, oh, he must have been throwing javelin, but like, no, he was in her bed. Yeah. That is a cool way to do it. I think that was what was so titillating about the Jocco Pistorius, not Jocco Pistorius. That's the musician. Yeah. Jocco Rolling. The South African. Yeah. The South African. Yeah. Yeah. Who had the razor, who has the like razor legs. Yeah. You're like, he killed his wife or girlfriend. And it's like part of it was like, did he use them? Dang. Yeah. Yeah. Did he use his little razor legs? Or this? The quadriplegic that just got charged with murder. And he, they, then you see footage of him shooting the gun and you're like, this is how? How do you do it? He, um, sorry, he's a quadruple amputee. Oh, okay. Yeah, wait. Hold on. Go back and tell the story as a quadriplegic. He's just like this. Actually, when you see this guy do it, you'd be like, he could probably do that too. Sure. This guy's like, he has no arms, no legs. I saw that. And you see him loading a magazine, pulling it back. See, that's like what my only fans is. That's what I watch exclusively. It's fucking, and then you see him. There's footage like in a tree stand. How do they have it? And then upside down, doing coke off of a, like a hundred dollar bill, then comes around and shoots a gun. Like, this guy's fucking. Brad. Is this the guy? Yeah, that's him right there because he's a professional corn holder too. Yeah, yeah. Look him up, look him up doing Coke and shooting his gun. I mean, he's also, yeah, I mean, that's a diminish what he was able to accomplish there. But he would more than just the, you know, yeah, this is him here. Look, this is him upside down doing a rail of Coke. Okay. Wow. Wow. It's kind of a hero story. He's kind of amazing. And then he got, he comes down, waddles over. And then he's like, oh, he can't hold the dollar balloon. No, but look what he can do. What the fuck? And then he just shoots that out the window. Shoot that out the window. Like that is neighbors. See, I don't know. I still, I would say allegedly murder, like, right? Because like, there's the burden of proof. Yeah. But when you first hear the story, like when the first story of first broke, they're like quadruple amputee charged with like gun murder. You're like, he can't do that. No, you know, that's crazy. You know, you see this guy's pretty bad. We have one piece of evidence we would like to show during the trial. I thought that he was a murderer. But this is him. But it might be worth seeing him do upside down cocaine and then shoot a automatic weapon out of window. Guys, unreal, man. And what a loophole put your hand on the Bible and he's like, sure. He's a great time to pitch. Tom and I are next project to you and see if you're interested. So we have a movie. We play FBI agents. We're looking for two other people. We think you and maybe whoever you think you would quadriplegic to alleged murder. Yeah. Have you gotten this pages? I play FBI agents who within the first 10 minutes of the movie, our van gets blown up by ISIS and we're left quadriplegic and we have to solve the murder of who left us quadriplegic. It's four of us called the quad squad. We're all quadriplegic. You're in. I'm in it, but I wanted all practical. Okay. So we have to, we got to, I go dangled down this. So we got to, we got to do. Yeah, yeah. We got to shoot. No, we got to. Oh, your character has no arms, no legs. Yeah, yeah. Oh, shut the fuck up. I didn't even think of that. Oh, I thought that's. Oh, no, I'm just in the chair with a strong like this. Like, and then think about this. Sure. All right. We pull our van up. We're like, all right. Well, everybody out. Go, go, go, but you got to watch us get out. Here's my pitch. Here's my pitch. Is it sort of a Voltron situation? So you guys, it's a Voltron meets kids in a big trench coat. Yeah. So you guys are down low in the, you're the legs. So you're moving us around big overcoat. Yeah, yeah, yeah, big overcoat. I'm in, I'm, I'm just the quad bod, right? And then whoever our fourth is is the head. Is Eddie Murphy? Yes, because I would love a chance to just redeem myself. So maybe you give him this pitch. Yeah. I could probably set up that Lisa zoom. You're like, what do you think? You're just following around in a wheelchair all day on set being like, well, and then did I mention the, I don't tell you about the sushi. Yeah. I never tell you about the sushi. If you ever meet any Murphy again, you're gonna be like, hey, there's more to that story. And he's gonna be like, well, I think going to and your brother's like, yeah, I didn't do the voice for you. I think that would help. He's like, you remember your brother has passed. Yeah. Let me do his voice. Do you ever hear the best, you ever hear the best Charlie Murphy story ever is my favorite Charlie Murphy story. So he gets out of the Navy and, and he comes out to L.A. and his brother is like famous. And he comes and his brother's like, yo, we're gonna go out tonight to the century club. And he's like, and that's the hot spot. So he goes, yeah, but I don't know me close to the voice Tom. I don't know me close. Say it to me. I ain't got no clothes. Yeah. And so Eddie Murphy gives him this bedazzled bus boy Jack. You remember the band the bus boys? It's a bedazzled bus boy, Jack. And he's just where you pants and that. You're tight. No shirt. And so he's like, Oh, yeah. So he's like, I'm looking fly. I walk into the century club and my brother's popping. He's a huge star. And everyone's like, Oh, shit. Oh shit. That's Eddie Murphy. That's Eddie Murphy. And they're like, yo, who's I with him? You go, that's his brother. And he go, that's his brother. He goes, yeah, I think he's a magician. And Charlie Murphy goes, that Jack has started burning off me. Do you have a fear about how being underdressed? Yeah. I mean, like you, you always look nice though. You just have like a button down or something. I always a good, but I'm like, you know, I just got rid of like a ton. I'm, I'm, I'm literally I'm in a moment. I'm like, who, what do I want to do? Because it's also like, I don't know. We're all as you get a certain age or you're like, what am I supposed to be graphic tease that I have? Yeah. Yeah. Or at least like short sleeve, loud shirts that I felt like we're cool six years ago. Just short just as I shaved my pussy for this. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Like the tux that says that. And so I'm like, I'm kind of in that moment. I'm like, what do I? Anyway, so truthfully, I also like, I mean, like wait, you guys both have lost a ton of weight. So how do you have you had to buy all new shit? Well, if you like, is that fun? Yeah. And then I went overboard, but so much shit that I was like, I have a department store at my house. And then I got rid of just hundreds and hundreds of articles of clothing. It's just too much. Yeah. And are you happy with where you are? Yeah. Yeah. I think I have a much better grasp on it. I don't think I've ever seen them wear the same outfit twice. No. Really? JP's maybe, but like, that's it. But like you, you always have a new outfit. Yeah. I guess I like, I don't like it though. I like, like clothes. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I like it. I like it sometimes. I'm trying to figure out what my really, because also it's like you get to a certain age. Also where you're like, what am I supposed to? I don't know. I just feel like you're right. There is an age where you're like, okay, this feels like like young. Yeah. I'm like a man. Yeah. Right. I'm like, I don't know if I should be wearing this anymore. Yeah. But like, I'll still wear the booty shorts. It looks good. Like, also, you're pretty caked up. I don't mind when you wear booty shorts. You know, yeah. I'm going, I want a big high tight little ass. Yes. Oh, I, I, I, what do you see my outfit? I sent it to my daughters and I was like, if I don't get a response quickly, you guys getting dick pics. Yeah. Not his. This is, right? I'll send it to the group. Wait. How do I send? I'm turning into a boomer. I got ray shorts. So they're super short. Oh, you look great. I got ray shorts. And I got a tank top. And I got brand new shoes on. No, it's so hard. I'm barely flexing. No, you're about to pass out about to. You're literally about to have an angry. That isn't the hundredth of that picture that I took because I felt like my arms were the best one. Yeah. That is by far you look great. Yeah. Fucking incredible. Yeah. Yeah. But that's not my bad shape. You've ever been. Yes. Without a doubt. I haven't drank in four months. I'm not counting. I have two months left. But my blood work is perfect. I mean, I want to do a game show called Check Your Blood Work. It's so good right now. And, and I'm stronger than I'm not stronger than I've ever been. But like for my body size, I'm down 19% body fat. I've lost 50 pounds. I feel better than I've ever felt now. Will I roll the dice and see if I can get fat again? Probably. Yeah. Yeah. See if I can get fat again. Like it's a challenge. It's funny. You've never been like you're really not sure. No, not really. I've been I've gotten big as I got older. I've gotten bigger at times where I'm like, like what, 140 pounds each leg. Wait, how much do you weigh? What do I weigh right now? I'm less than I, where am I like 175, 180? Wow. Yeah. But you have to rain it in. You have to rain it in. Yeah. I'm raining it in right now. So what's that for you? Like I skipped the pasta, that kind of thing? Trying to. I had a ton of weird food allergies and stuff that have made, like drinking, for example, I've just gotten physically my body cannot like seemingly tolerate alcohol very much anymore, which is a bummer because I want, I would like, but, but it's, I mean, it's pretty proven that it's really good for your body. It is. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Do you do gummies or anything or smoke or? I do alcohol gummies. Oh, nice. I would love that. I do. I go do cognac. I do Hennessy gummies. I just started. Oh, you know what I'm saying? I like Hennessy gummies. But that is not a bad idea. Alcohol gummies is a very dangerous concept. It's funny. People envision my life. Like sometimes I, I met John, I'm a no, John mayor, but I saw him one time at an event and he came up and he was like, sure, you fucking wasted right now. And I was like, no, yeah. He's like, wait, are you wasted all the time? I was like, no, I'm not wasted right now. Yeah. But I think people think I'm drunk constantly. Yeah. And then, but they're not that wrong. They're not that off. I mean, like, yeah, they're not crazy. Like someone's like, everyone said to me yesterday, the one thing everyone said to me was, what's wrong with you? Yeah. Because you've lost weight. Well, because I'm sober. I'm sober. I'm not drinking. So I guess I'm louder when you're drinking. You feel louder when you're sober or when you're drunk. I don't notice it. You're definitely quieter like this, definitely. Because they could go the other way, especially in a social scenario. Uh-huh. When you see it, like, I think at that, if you had been like knocking them back, you'd have been like, that's you when you're drinking. And you were just more like, how are you? Who do you prefer? You like sober, but way better. Everybody does. You said that to me one time in like, in private when When no one was around, you're like, "Just you know, I don't know." like you sober better. And I was drunk when you said it. And I was like, cool. - That was his version. - Everyone that loves me, everyone that loves me likes me sober better. Anyone that doesn't love me and just likes me likes drunk birth weight. - Well, that's, I guess that's telling. That was going to say I like drunk birth. - Yeah. - Everyone does. - And it's not that I don't love you. I just don't know you well enough to love you. So right now, I just like you enough to want you drunk. - Thank you. - I like, I like drunk birth, you know. - No, I like, but it's interesting, 'cause I was like your great shape right now. And also, there is a thing when people are not drinking regularly, they are more connected. So like you feel, you feel very engaged and crisp and clear right now. - Yeah, yeah. You sound like my daughter. - Fuck you. - My daughter, I love was like, oh, she, I shouldn't seen me, like I didn't drink for like three months or whatever. She came to one of my shows. She was like, wow, I want what? She goes, you look incredible. Let me see your fingers. And I was like, what? She goes, oh my God, I can see bones in there. They're not these fat red sausages. She goes, let me see those ankles. And she goes, whoa, look at your ankles. I can see your bones. I was like, what? And then we hung out at a great time. And then at the end, she was like, so just quit drinking forever. I like you like this. She goes, you're listening to people. And I was like, yeah, but that's not, I don't make my money listening to people. You feel like your shows are better or worse? No, they're way better. I'm way better comics over. Yeah. Stone's over. I'm so much more creative. I'm so much more present. But I think that there's something to be said for, I wish I could redefine my drinking. Like I really wish I could be like, like you guys are like him, really? Where he goes, like he'll have a drink. And then it's almost like, like he's not allowed to drink. Like his parents are gonna check his breath. Like your mom, your mom does check. He'll have give her a kiss tonight. Yeah. He'll have a drink. He'll have last night he had a drink. And then he was like, all right, I gotta go. Then I was like, that's like a guy who has a horse and just canters it around the stables. I go, I bought a horse because I want to fucking watch it sweat. Yeah. I want to get on a run and get an asymptotic relationship where the fucking, you got to put this in next season. You heard? Yeah, by the way, I would love to see a horse sweat. What's that? I heard somebody talk about drinking like this. Hang on, hold on, hold on. Have you ever run on a horse? Yes. You've run, you've run. Yes. How great is the feeling when the horse is neck, and you are one, and you're not in the saddle anymore. You're above the saddle and you feel like you, and that is how I drink. Like that is the feeling I like to have. It's that flow state. You're in that flow state. Yeah. And you can have that sober, I guess. But not like that. Is that what it feels like? Yeah, it is. It's kind of him just majestically barebacking a horse through a grand field as one. All these like analogies that he paints about drinking. Sometimes you're like, God, I wish I felt dispassioned about anything. Sure. It's so good. So the, I've written horses a few times over my life. Not many times, but one time I was in Argentina shooting a movie, and I got connected to this guy, Nacho Figuera, who is like one of the greatest polo players and he's the, he's the face of Ralph Loren Polo for polo. I think I know who this guy is. He's like, he's like, he's like, he's in Santa Barbara. He's like a, he's a fucking, and he looks like a beautiful arched. I mean, he's like, and we, I got connected to his place to go outside of watch this Buenos Aires. And then I went, look at him. I mean, look at that. Yeah. So just like a Nazi, we were shooting a Nazi movie. Look at this fucking guy. Yeah. Look at this fuck. What did they, Nacho Figuera? Nacho Figuera. Yeah. Virgin. Isn't that wild? Yeah, he's a virgin. Yeah. He's never fucked a horse like you. Yeah. And look at this cock. Holy shit. And I might jerk off to him. I went, I went down, I went to his polo, his personal ranch, his polo facility with like, and it was just majestically in Argentina's famous for their polo and their horses. And go out there and he takes us out on his, he takes us out on his, this is his incredibly beautiful family. And like, and it's really, those are the horses. I mean, like, and we're out in his ranch and I brought this incredibly like beautiful woman who I was in Argentina with and like, we rode horses and I rode like a mother fucker. Yeah. And I don't, I've not written many times, but I got on that horse and I was like, Tom, you know, at like 4 p.m. and Vegas on day three of some sort of thing, just fucking ripped. Just riding. I really rode beautifully and I got off and we like went, I went back into, to be a with her. And then, and I was like, I feel like the coolest fucking guy I have to. And then my face just like started to explode with like red allergic reaction because I like rode the horse and like, pet the horses like beautiful fucking main and then touched my face and my skin exploded. And I was like, yeah, she looked at you and she was like, oh, you're not so cool. She's like, maybe I'll stay in my place tonight. And I was like, yeah, fair enough. I was like, that's life, you know what I mean? When I was a kid, I'd look at bizarre magazine and vogue magazine and I'd see models on boats that were like, oiled up in bikinis and I would get so sad to think I would never have that. So, that's probably not going to be in my life and when I see that picture, I regret every choice I've ever made. But Tom, there's just no way I want that so bad. You know, we're born with a fate, you know what I mean? And that's what's funny, dude. Yeah, I bet he is. I bet he is. I bet he is. He's fucking funny. Yeah, I was trying to help him out. No, he's doing like, and he's doing like theater small arenas. I got good. He does hockey arena. Yeah. And he and him are developing, Eddie Murphy and him are doing really, you know, I'm a friend. He's got the best head of hair I've ever seen. Yeah. And he honestly, the biggest unfortunate thing, he couldn't be like a fucking nicer dude. Although, I guess if you look at the problem with me riding a horse, it's my dick gets caught in my boot. You're like, oh, that's a pretty good hard time accent. You would close to it. But that second photo too, where he's squinting, that's a, he's not posing. That's a genuine photo of that guy. Yeah. He's on the polo. He's on the polo field right now. And you're like, that's a perfect picture. Yeah. He's just like, and there's like a bunch of horses right off camera looking and then being like, they're guys. So hot. I will be recreating all his photos and greenscreen. I want that. You want that? Yeah. Anyway, he rides a, him riding a horse around is like you, is like how you feel when you're drinking? Have you? Yeah. That's the only thing. Especially when you have a moment where everyone falls asleep and the house is done. And you got a bottle of wine, like a little bit left and you go, a port and then you fill it to the glass, but it just gets to the bottom and you go, I don't think that's going to cut it. You go, let's dip into some whiskey tonight and then you, ooh, I wouldn't mind deep diving, new order or joy division or the Smiths and, and get in alone time with the lights out getting a couple candles lit and just get fucking after it. And then you're, and you're dancing and you're dancing and there's a part of your brain that knows that if anyone saw you, they would laugh hysterically at how free you are, but you're dancing by yourself in a fucking, in my man cave or in a gym and you're just like, in my gym and that feeling, I miss it so much and you can't get it sober. You just can't. In a hotel room when you're like, it's Sunday and you go, you leave the funny bone and you're like, can I get anything for your room and you're like, can I get a 12 pack and they're like, yeah, sure. And then you load it up and you go, I'm going to have two and you have two and on the third one, you're repacking your bag and all of a sudden you're like, God damn it, I haven't listened to some hardcore hip hop in a while or like something you just haven't gotten into. You genuinely drink alone and listen to music by yourself for hours. 100%. Wow. It's one of my favorite, one of my favorite things in the world. Now I don't do it all the time, but I will write him into the room. You ever come by the hotel. It's only good alone. Like, I like drinking with people and I can't remember. I feel like when I drink, I want a fucking chat. I don't want way more. Yeah. I don't think I would. I'll get, I mean, I'll, you know, I'll get high sometimes and hang out, but even then I don't. High alone. I like that. Yeah. But drinking. I'm a real chatty drink. Yeah. I want a fucking chop it up. So you'll just listen to like joy division alone, oh, get into, get into radio head and just get, get into a band where you go, I'm going to deep dive it and I'm going to fucking feel it. You should pop an oxy and do that. That's a good run. Yeah. I mean, there's, there's something to be said. I don't, it's not like therapy, but there's something to be said to be getting, getting fucked up alone. Yeah. And with no one around and just, just you and the, and the bottle and, and, and just going like somebody. You're with the box. The bottle. I love, I miss it so much. It's a one thing I miss. It definitely doesn't sound like you have an issue with it. Get to meet. I don't hear any sort of hearing at all. No, it's, here's the deal. Here's the deal. Leigh-ham. Leigh-ham. Fucking Leigh-ham. I, I, I haven't drank in four months and I, and I barely ever bring it up. I brought it up three times today, but yeah, I barely shut up. No, I would imagine it wouldn't, I would, I imagine it wouldn't come up for you at all in conversation. But, but I, I, I feel great. I don't miss it like I don't miss it like like yesterday I did not I did not think about it once other than other people coming up to me going, Hey, man, are you okay? And then I was like, Yeah, I'm fine. And I'm like, I'm just like, it's weird. It is you like this. Yeah. I said to Sam, Sam Raul goes, Hey, man, are you all right? I went, I'm, yeah, I'm fine. I go, I'm not drinking. I think that's what everyone's noticing. I go, man, you'd be shocked to me. People said that to me. And he goes, really? And Deon Cole walked up goes, are you good, buddy? And I went and, and, and Theo came up. Are you okay? And I was like, based on your size or your demeanor, I have no idea what it is. You said it to me at the store when I walked up. You're like, are you all right? Yeah. And I was like, I don't know what I'm doing. Maybe I'm just, you came up real like kind of stern. And like, that's what I said a year. I think it's regular people faces. Oh, yeah. I think I'm doing regular people faces. I think when I'm, I used to be good going like, I think that's a part of me putting on maybe putting on to cover up the fact that maybe I'm not feeling 100%. Yeah. I don't know. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, I work out, I work out pretty hard now. But like, I was really punitive in the mornings I wake up and I get to the gym and I'd be like, let's fucking go. Like, and that's not all when you're so, when you're not, when I'm, when I'm bringing right you it, because it's like a, it's a reward and, uh, you have to punish yourself. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I don't know. It's, it's happening so much that I go, I can't wait to start drinking. So no one talks to me. All, these are all normal, healthy thoughts. Dude, I got the most aggressive text from edit his name out. That like, Hey, man, did I do something to you? Like what happened to you? Are you okay? This is going yesterday. Yeah. No, this is the night I saw you. Really? And I was like, well, like, and by the way, can I tell you edit this one out entirely? And I was like, what the fuck, dude? Yeah. Like, and so I kind of just want to start drinking to not deal with people. Sure. I mean, it's like, it's, I know that's a cheap one. Well, but I think it's like, I guess if you, people are, you see you in a certain vibration, right? Of like, you know, little loose. And even if you're not drunk, you're just, you're, you're sort of in that people like, you know, people are more, they, they understand that version of you. But if you are like not drinking, you're sober, you're clear. But you're also just a little less like fuzzy. That might be what people are used to. So if you're not come, if you're not approaching that way. Yeah. I said, we were, we were, I never understood, and I'm certain you're probably like this type of person. But Tom, I only used, I used two examples in this story to Leanne. We were at a, I did a big show in, um, with Carolina, and we had a huge meet and greet, like 40 people. And, um, I said to Leanne, I'm, I, the very, before I started, I said, I could go to bed right now. And I said casually, you know, I never understood the part of Tom where he could go home. Like Tom, yeah, if Tom is like, like they go, hey, we need to be here from seven to nine 30. Tom is the first person to go, how long do we have to be here for? And then I'm always like, I never understood it. Nikki Glazer, we would do big shows. And Nikki would be like, I'm going, I'm going to bed. And I'd be like, why don't they want to get after? Why don't they want to hang out? And I said to Leanne, oh, I get it. When you're not, if you're not partying, this is a waste of fucking time. And I was like, I could go to bed right now. And she was like, what's wrong with you? And I was like, I don't know. I mean, like, that, I think that's a normal. When I get in bed, I do a dance. I love getting in beds. When I'm sober, I get in bed. And I'm like, yeah, great. I love it. And I love sleeping. Yeah. And I love waking up. And then, but I also, it's like, I have a show tonight and it's going to be packed. And I'm, how is the, how are the fan interaction? Like, how is it dealing with like meet and greet like fully sober? It's different. It's, you feel less like a person, I think less like a person sober or less like so when you're sober, you feel a little bit like an object. Uh-huh. When you're, when you're a little lubricated, you just feel like you're in the, you're in it a little more with what? When I'm lubricated, I am there. Yeah. And I'm present. And I'm talking to you. And I want, because I have a drink. I don't know when anywhere, you know, when you're sober, and I, I was at an event and they, I, I, I thought to myself, have I never noticed this? But they had me by the arm and they were taking me from station to station. And I was like, being led around it. Yeah. Yeah. And I was like, drinking. I don't think I'd notice this. But I go, I'm not yours. I remember. And I was like, I'm not yours. I'm mine. It's the literal definition of a handler. It's just like handling you around like Bob Hope like the end of it. Go over here. Yeah. Get in there. And I do think it is you are not, I mean, I, I think that is why a lot of celebrities, famous people end up with substance abuse issues because the actual interactions with, in situations like this are so much easier. Like I found when I'm like, you know, a little, you know, like, I've had a few drinks. Like it's so much easier to move through those moments than like stone sober. But then you also find you have like really beautiful, you can have really cool moments with people otherwise. But I only had two. Yeah. Yeah. Yesterday, I didn't think about drinking. I never, I, I didn't think about having a drink. And I definitely noticed when people got wasted. Oh, yeah. But I was like, interesting. Sure. I definitely noticed it. Oh, that's interesting. Yeah. We should remind people that open mouth and loud season are streaming. Oh, yeah. I don't know. Wow. We've been like an hour and a half, I think. I don't know. Um, loud mouth and open season. Yeah. Uh, a K, a, yeah, maybe season. And do I, do I get so desperate to make sure I fucking sell? Well, I, yeah, but also it's so lame when you, when you go on anyone's thing for a promotion and they, go through the whole thing. And then you're like, Hey, hosts, you fucking say it, man. Yeah. Like you mentioned. Yeah. That's why I came on. Yes. Oh, I did someone's podcast to promote free bird. And four days ago, they did my podcast. And after it, they're like, by the way, your show is fucking incredible. I go, you could have said that on your podcast, the week I was on. That's why I watched yours. I get, I appreciate it. I was so, I was so blown away when people actually watched mine. Yes. That it meant something to me that I was like, there's no way he's coming. Cause I do, I, not just to, I respect you, but I like you and I like what you do. And I go, I will like this. I'm not going to not like this. Sure. And it was, it's fucking great. It is funny as shit. The, it is dirty, but it's not overly dirty. It, it's interesting. I only think once in the whole series, you say the one that you suck my dick, but like, I noticed that like you measure the dirty. So it's not just a dirty, even though they are all all fucking and eating pussy and sucking dicks. It's not, that's not what it's about. It's about interrelationships. Yeah. And it's about a community and, I mean, I don't want to know spoiler, but the one that, when dude comes out gay, I fucking laughed out loud. Oh, gay moose. Yeah. Okay. There we go. It's the moose. Yeah. By the way, good reveal. Yeah. But that was always the joke in the room. It was like, oh, well, it came loose. Yeah. Oh, it's gay moose. But it's such a great series. It really is. Thank you. I appreciate it. I appreciate you watching it. And, and your, and your kind words. Tom, I'm curious what you thought about it. Well, one of the things I love, I love animals. And so just seeing, you both commit, like, so much energy into animals. What was your favorite animal? Yeah. The raccoon and the moose. You like gay moose? I love gay moose. I love raccoon. I was like, I bet that's Nick, you know? Yeah. Yeah. And I read it. I found out I was right. Yeah. Tell me about goats and adults, um, goat and adults is new projects. Oh my God. It's, I don't even want it. You know what? You take it because I don't want to fuck it up. Well, because he fans out. It's like he's trying to talk to me about my brother, Jeremy Crowell. Yeah. Yeah. He just, he, we went to a steakhouse. It was great. He was like, I don't know if to get. There's like, hello, Tom. It's good to see you. Should I get the strip of the ribeye? So what's adults and what's adults? Is the show I produce on FX? It's coming out the end of the summer, season two. It's like 20 somethings in New York, like classic 20 something, you know, first place in New York. They're, they live in like deep queens. And it's just very funny. You know, again, sort of like big jokes, but also some heart emotion to it. It's like kind of a, the cast is phenomenal. The five kids are really fucking funny, all really talented. And then go, oh, goad is a new film. I'm in the, it's a Steph Curry's basketball kids basketball movie. I'm the, I'm a, of course, as we all know, I am the agent. The referee. I'm a Komodo dragon, who's a, sort of the Dennis Rodman of the team. Right. Modo. Love it. So good. Basketball is such a fun sport. So you're into basketball and animals. So much. Yeah. And I like hormones too. Yeah, there you go. Yeah. Fucking, there you go. See, he fucking did the work. Yeah. Does Nick Crowe read comments? I'm off every once in a while. I'm off social media. Yeah, I'm my phone because it, because it just, it, it, not because I, I get so inside the comments, but because I just get lost in the fucking algorithm. But just for, to be specific, you want people to say, Jew or Jewish, if they're leaving a comment. I really think it, the only, if it's a threat, yeah, I want Jewish, ironically. Okay. If it's a compliment, I just want like, hey, he really Jude that episode. But he mean, they mean it's like he nailed it. Got it. It doesn't sound as bad when you go, I want to kill this Jewish person. Right. Versus I'm going to kill that Jew. Yeah. That sounds bad. It lands so differently. Yeah. Yeah. I just realized that will be clipped out. Yeah. Yeah. Me going, I'm going to kill that Jewish person. Yeah. We're not saying it's Nory. Oh wait, that's okay, you ready? Nory. Wait, are you in LA? No, I'm not, I can't make it. Well, I saw a picture of you. I just wanted to congratulate you, man. You look fucking awesome, bro. Hey, you're being requested. Oh, you're on the podcast, Nory. I'm here with Nick Crowley's got a new show called, uh, oh, uh, mating season on Netflix. Tell them. Tell them I said, what's up, man? Tell them I said, what's up? Hey, Nory, how you doing, man? I'm great, man. Can't wait to, uh, to see you in person. Well, I'm telling you, man, you know, Bert looks good on in the picture, but in person, whoo, dog. Yeah. Yeah, I'm proud of you, man. I'm proud of you. You still haven't drank since the last time I saw you. No, I haven't. We haven't even talked about it. Did it come up? Okay, so you're going to be last in July. I'm relapsing in July, yeah. You guys have a wonderful day, man. Hey, I love you, Nory. Have a great day. You didn't say I love you back. Um, do you know who Nory is? Yeah. Nory Ega, the rapper. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Of course. Uh, yes. Nory, is it Nory Reed? What? No, it's Nory Ega. The rapper. Is it really? Yeah. Yeah. That's amazing. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. He's, uh, he's a sort of. Yeah. That's so funny. Yeah. He's, uh, he's, he's one of the best guys around and he's a big drinker. And I did it. I did his podcast and he was like, how can we, how can you stay healthy? I go, I run. He called me the next morning. He was drinking a Japanese whiskey on his, on his, overlooking the ocean. And he goes, I think I'm going to start running. So I stay healthy. And now he's got a huge five K. He does. He runs every morning. He's got a running podcast. He's really in the running group. He's got a huge group. And it's, it's crazy. And he still does drink champs, drink champs. Did you? Oh, he's drink champs. Yeah. He's. I didn't realize that. You would be great on drink champs. Yeah. I mean, you got to get drunk though. Great. Yeah. Yeah. I'll drink, uh, I'll have a couple of Hennessey gummies. Yeah. Yeah. No, but I would genuinely, I mean, that would be so fun. I would love to get drunk on a podcast. Like I do think that would be fun. Yeah. You guys do that. How often do we, you guys doing that? We? It's happened. If I wasn't feeling it. Yeah. Give it a little. A little. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I just, I just tapped the horse a little bit with my heel. Come on. Here we go, girl. Yeah. Yeah. And then you're fucking. Yeah. There you go. There you go. Man. Yeah. That's what nachos figure. It's the boat. Where did you meet nachos? I connected through some random guy. I was down there for a couple of months and was just and he was incredibly warm. Just like, come on out. Did you shoot out in the country or in? We were shooting mainly in B.A. And then out was B.A. Buenos Aires. Oh, oh, B.A. Do you go back to Peru? Yeah, but not a lot. I mean, I used to go all the time. Last time I went was two years ago. I went to Buenos Aires, then Santiago, then Lima, and then Mexico. I did a tour. Oh, really? Yeah. In Spanish or in English? I both. I did both. Yeah. But the silence was in Spanish. It didn't go well. How is your Spanish stand up? I mean, you can do bit. Like, I know you can. I had to. I had to practice. It's really hard. So I was, I realized how much work it was going to take after I did a set like in Burbank somewhere in Spanish. And I was like, yeah, that was rough. Different. And then I started, uh, you know, when you're doing stand up in English, you're, you're focused like your mind is present, right? And then do you have to dial that up 100% for me for Spanish? So I did it. I put together a tour. I did, I did a Arizona weekend. I did like three different weekends. Full of all that, Mark. All Spanish. Yeah, yeah. Like all Spanish shows. Then I did a Texas tour. I did Dallas, Austin, Houston. I was, I was doing it at, at the clubs. And then I had like 40 to 45. So when I hear in same material, same material, but I translated it. And then, but then you have to like work out things, right? Because it can't be like an exact translation. And then by working it out, I was able to be like, okay, I could, I can present this to like a Spanish speaking market. But when I went down there, I announced it as English shows, because they told me they go, everyone's going to buy a ticket, knows you as an English speaking right comedian. So it's going to go better. Yes. If you do that. So what? And they were right. What ended up happening is the audience came. They're native Spanish speakers who also speak English, who also speak English. I would do the show in English. And then I would do like half an hour at the end of Spanish and then they lost their fun. They lost their minds. Yeah. That's fucking that was really fun. That's that's because I speak Spanish. But I don't, I'm not a native speaker. So I have good speak Spanish. I'm not bad. Do you guys do it real quick? Do it? I want to watch. Okay. El quiere que nosotros hablar, podemos hablar si quieses, pero ahora es un acento de argentino. Sí, un poquito. Un poquito. Sí, un poquito. Sí. Se nota. Pero sí, se nota. Se nota. Che, boludo, este mira este gordo. Oh, gordo. Que no está gordo. Que no está muy viviendo. Que prefieres más gordo del mundo? El boludo. Che, boludo, ese es el mundo, así. Parece que está embarazada con quimelos. Quimelos de Whiskey. Sí, Whiskey también tiene de bocar de todo. Ah, de todo. No, para de verdad. En julio cuando vuelve a tomar. Sí, sí. Y que te vas a poner. Bueno, mira, en julio va a celebrar y tú. Yo te va a morir. Yo me quedo en el cas. No, he speak great. Well, that's great. And you do with the accent, everything. A lit, yeah, I can sort of do the bit of the accent. So I could do, I could do it. I could do it. Tide three. I could open for you on your next Latin American tour. Let's do it. Let's do it. I'll do two and I'll do three in English and then two in Spanish. That's perfect. Just to, you know, make it all make sense. But I, because I can do like I lit like the spanish, do you Spanish one or no? The Spanish. But I lived six months in Madrid. Yeah. Ah, I lived in Madrid. Yeah. In the ball, I lived in Barcelona. Ah, puta, tista. Eres. Puta. Chaz de puta madre. Mira. Kilipoyas. Kilipoyas. Yeah. También en San Sebastián. En San Sebastián. San Sebastián. Yeah. Yeah. Si los guajos. Quiero conocer país básco. Si, es linda. Es la haurcia. Where did you get this from? Just a, like a true infatuation with Latin culture. No, I think I lived in Spain. And then, and then from there, like how to, was like, oh, I can sort of now speak this. So I spent a lot of time in Latin America and then randomly shot a movie in Argentina. What movie was it? Oh, wait, was it? Hold on, hold on. Was it the Ikeman movie? Yes. Yeah. Operation finale. Yeah. You were, you did an Ikeman movie. I did an Ikeman is me. Yeah. It's hunting for Ikeman is me and Oscar. It's a, the House on Garibaldi Street is the book. Yes. Yes. I read that book. Oh, yeah. And Sir Ben Kingsley is Adolf Ikeman. Yeah. Yeah. And I got to tell you, Ikeman was a real knucklehead. I don't know if you know who he was. Ikeman is the reason that Israel believed the Holocaust. Sorry. Israel did not. So I watched it. There's a, we're going to keep that one. Yeah. No, no, no. Israel did not believe a lot of people in Israel did not believe the Holocaust was real. I think most of the people in Israel believed it was real because they were the only people who survived the Holocaust. No, no, no, no, no. I can't speak about shit. You don't know about. Guys, guys, guys. Okay. Get ready. So Ike, so they kidnapped Ikeman, right? From Argentina, right? Yeah. They pull them into Israel. They put them on trial. And there were a lot of people that were like, their exact words were, if this Holocaust thing was so bad, how did you get here? Like if they killed everyone, why are you here? And Rayleigh's were saying that? Maybe it was the world. I think that, but no, hold on. There's a moment. There's a moment. They bring Ikeman over and him, his trial proved the Holocaust. Yes. The, let's call it the alleged Holocaust. Right? Because we're on a podcast with a couple of fellows and we can really get into that. But no, but there's like six million. There was the moment where they brought the, no, but this is like, I just watched a like a, like there's a huge. So they, so they Ikeman, they got Ikeman and my it's like, I'm one of the guys who goes and captures Ikeman with Oscar, Isaac. I saw the movie. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Oscar. I think thanks for all the kind words about it. Yeah. By the way, and they performed. Thank you. And we, anyway, we come back. So they bring him back to prove, to have a trial. Like this guy stood trial. What's, what I was just talking to someone recently, there's another documentary about Mangala, who was like a true monster in the Holocaust, the doctor. Yeah. He was in Brazil. And they, when they brought Ikeman back, they were like, we're not going to keep chasing these other, we're not going to chase Mangala. We know where he is, we're not going to bring him back. We're bringing back Ikeman to stand trial to. And that will be the symbol of this. Yeah. Of all of this. Yeah. Versus like continuing to hunt. I mean, I think they did continue to hunt these guys down. Yeah. They got, they still, yeah. And then Mangala, did he get like, he died at the beach? Did he get killed there? He just died. I feel like. He got hit with a javelin. Did he? And is that why they don't participate in the Olympics? That's why Brazil doesn't do these. The Ikeman story for people that don't know is a fucking fun. It feels like a made up mission impossible story. It doesn't feel real, but it is. It's, it's super real. And weirdly, I knew a guy disconnected from it, who was one of the guys who went and captured him. You know, the guy. I met him. It was like, I had been like a, you know, the, you know, Israeli, Mossad guy back in the fucking day and the guys went and got him and and so yeah, we it's a it's a crazy story and Sir Ben Kingsley who you do refer to as Sir Ben and he in method acting really leaned into the Ikeman of it all with us like he was not he showed up at the table rig you know big table everyone shows it up and everyone's like reading the script and he shows up with a leather bound script of the movie and with a swastika and but like the Asian swastika like the symbol it just happens to be similar. It was piece before yeah and he he did the entire he was off book for the table read. So he would turn the pages with everybody and then just did all of his dialogue with ever looking down and it was and he's playing Ikeman and it's the six of us like we kidnapped this guy we haven't kidnapped and then we smuggle him out and get on a flight go back to Israel and he like it was it was such a fucking baller status move with us that we are all like holy shit yeah it was it was cool and that crazy thing. Oh go ahead. Well about that story because I remember reading that book it's it's a really good book is that it the Ikeman's son bragged to his girlfriend about who he was and that's really what got the whole ball rolling on it yeah which is like a fascinating thing. Yeah so funny the only thing I remember from the whole the thing I remember from the whole Ikeman trial was that there was I guess maybe it was the world didn't believe the Holocaust happened I thought it was people in Israel. I think there was no one in Israel on board with it they were like no no no no and then there's a moment where the guy talked about the guy motherfucker there's a moment in the thing where the guy goes I was rescued by an officer and and and they have the guy on the thing and the guy had a number written on his and I'll never forget that guy and then the guy stands up in the in the trial and walks up and he's the guy and that's the moment you're right in that a lot of people in the world were like this what are you talking people still believe the Holocaust didn't happen there's a few more and more yeah there's more and more it's incredibly scary it's incredibly encouraging but there's there's a lot of people wait so wait hey on this is a dumb question so everyone in Israel they were all they were all like we know yeah I mean literally Israel was formed out of the Holocaust like the the atrocity occurred and then everyone was like let's give him a country yeah you don't know I mean and everyone who went there I mean there were like Middle Eastern Jews and diaspora from America or the Far East or whatever who came to Israel but the majority of the Jews who went and settled in Israel had been in the Holocaust or been in Europe during the Holocaust or had gotten out and went there yeah with those two dials but I was informed a lot of people yeah that informed the world and yes maybe that's what I heard yes I miss your things but I but I remember hearing that the argument thing was like super pivotal in like proof of the Holocaust yes yes and uh this is uh this is turned into quite an episode we've really hit them all yeah we really yeah it's just uh well I'm or when are you going to start a podcast I guess someone but yeah for for the record you do believe that it was real right yeah well just the numbers are a little quick no really yeah yeah yeah no I believe in the Holocaust I believe in it I believe in it too I believe in it too so me it's like evolution you know yeah it just makes sense or just like pop music I just like believe in the power of it you know the Gaga yeah I'm a little monster whether it happened or not is secondary yeah this is my heart I believe in it yeah do you think you can do an animated show about the Holocaust um I feel like Jerry Lewis covered that with uh there's that movie you made that has never been seen like the day the clown cried it's like his Holocaust clown movie that I it's like never seen the light of day but uh every every couple of life is beautiful right and uh that's a that's a classic Holocaust yeah yeah just found there's some fun movies out there yeah yeah go ahead check it out uh check out meaning season uh check out roommates or goats also just check out any Holocaust movie you can get your hands on yeah see if you believe it all right um I think that's it man thanks so much cover all the bases yeah we got through it all thanks for coming man thanks for having genuinely thank you guys buddy that's a huge fun thanks guys bird time time and bird one goes top the swath the other where's the shirt time tell stories and birds the machine there's not a chance and hell that they'll keep the clean here's what we call two bears one cake