My Most Powerful Sex Magic Ritual 59

- The most powerful manifestation ritual I have ever come up with. I'm going to tell this in the way that I used it to call in my person. I gotta release some pain, I gotta release some grief, and I gotta release some heartbreak. Now, the big secret to a grieving ritual is you're not going in being like, get rid of the tears, get rid of the heartache. What you're doing is you're fueling the unfelt things. You're gonna grieve first, and then you're gonna sex magic after. It's called magic, but it's not just magic. It's actually working with some of the most potent forces of the universe. Hi, and welcome to This Tantric Life. I'm your host, Layla Martin. This is special solo cast edition, where I'm going to share with you my most powerful ritual for manifesting that I have ever created. It is a minimum seven day process, and it combines a grieving ritual with a shortened sex magic process to be able to empty out your nervous system of anything that's holding you back, and then fill it up with everything that you want through the power of sex magic. So I'm gonna walk you through this process in this solo cast so that you can use it to create what you desire. I used it to call in my partnership, but you can use it for anything that you want. And I've got ahead and included some potential music and a step-by-step guide, anywhere that you can find links for this podcast. So it'll be in the show notes, or it'll be around the podcast, depending on what platform you are watching this on. So enjoy the solo cast, and I hope that you are able to use this to create exactly what you desire. This came about before I was going to Burning Man in 2022, and I was like, I'm ready. I'm ready for my husband. I'm ready for my long-term partner. Like, I have gone through my separation. I have dated. I have been ghosted. I have had some very sexy experiences. I have had a few short-term relationships to really feel into what I want, who I've become, what I'm ready for. And then I'm fucking ready. I'm ready for him. And I wanted to create a manifestation experience that would be like super charged, like just like extra, like just like you to throw in the kitchen sink on the manifestation. And I was like, what is the most powerful way that I could call my person in? So I'm going to tell this in the way that I used it to call in my person, but you can use this to create anything. You can use this to make your current relationship better. You can use this to call in a career opportunity. You can use it for health. I was using it for health recently. This exact process. And honestly, I turn a corner from using this exact process. It's amazing what it can do. So I'm going to tell the story through the lens of calling him a man, but I want you to also imagine how you can use it for literally anything that you want. So when I was ready to really call my person, I was like, all right, my nervous system is full of things that I don't want. So whenever you want something and you have a hard time calling it in, you're usually filled with something else. Sadness, pain, rage, self-loathing, disgust, whatever it is. In my case, I knew that it was grief. Now, the important thing to consider is that grief is almost always part of creating a new timeline. Why? Because I found that when we create a new timeline, there is for most of us, I'd say like 90% of us, a part of us that has to grieve that we didn't have that thing already. Like if I can suddenly have the relationship of my dreams, then there's a part of me that has to grieve that I didn't create it already. Or if I'm going to create health and I haven't had health for a long time, I'm going to grieve the part that was sick, what was lost in being sick. So not everybody has this, but enough people have a grieving process that it usually takes them by surprise. And they don't give themselves the space to properly grieve so that they can actually be on the new timeline. So this manifestation ritual has space for a grieving ritual. And that grief allows you to aggrieve what you didn't have in the past or wherever you fucked up or wherever you didn't get what you didn't want or wherever you made mistakes or to release anything else in the way. So I'm calling it a grief ritual, but think of it as an emptying out ritual. Now your nervous system gets filled up with things. So it's like, if you think of your nervous system as this beautiful vessel, like let's think of it as an antique cup, right? With like jewels on it and it's your favorite metal gold or rose gold or silver, right? I'm a gold girl. So your nervous system, this beautiful cup gets filled up oftentimes with lower frequency vibrations that don't get all the way processed. So when you're like, I wanna fill this cup with the most beautiful love or the most beautiful sex or a new career or health, right? And your cup is already filled with your tears and your frustration and your past experiences and your grief, right? You can pour the most beautiful liquid in there and you know what's gonna happen? It's gonna turn into like a clusterfuck. It's not gonna turn into this beautiful liquid 'cause you're not starting with an empty cup. So any good manifestation, you gotta empty the cup first and then you fill it. So in this, what makes the manifestation super charged is that you're giving yourself the time to grief. All right, we're gonna pause for just a moment and I'm gonna invite you to join my email list. You might be like email, but honestly, email is where I share my deepest teachings, my most personal stories and my most outrageously good content. It's also where you can stay connected to all of the podcasts that I release and my programs where you can train more deeply with me. So if you wanna join, head over to LaylaMartin.com and sign up with your best email address. So for me, I grieved actually every afternoon or evening to empty out and then I did "Sex Magic" in the morning. Now you can do your own timing of this. You could grieve in the morning and then do "Sex Magic" right after it. There doesn't have to be separation. Or you can do what I did, which is like, I kind of like grieved and released through the night and then "Sex Magic" in the morning with like the new fresh energy. So it's up to you. It doesn't have to be split in time, but it's nice if it is. And the idea is you're gonna grieve first and then you're gonna "Sex Magic" after. I think the most powerful number, a minimum number of times to do this is seven times. That's how many times I did it to call in my person. But you could also do 21. Now the point of doing this a lot is that to create a new timeline, you have to actually shift your nervous system. So "Sex Magic" is the most powerful practice I know for shifting your entire nervous system. But it's not like if you've got some karmic interference, if you believe that love is unsafe or you've gotten stuck in some kind of cycle of chasing red flags or attracting the wrong kind of person or you and your partner have been in a sexless situation for a while and there's like a buildup of fear and sadness in your nervous system or an underlying fear of intimacy. Or you wanna be healthy, but your nervous system has like gotten in this frequency of illness. It takes time for your nervous system to settle into a higher frequency reality. So the more times that you do this, the more powerful it will be. And that's really what I see is usually the most limiting thing. People are like, "Oh, I did "Sex Magic" once to like, get a new career. I did "Sex Magic" once to call in my new partner. Or maybe I did it like four times over a month. You're like, if you wanna overturn deeply entrenched patterns inside of your nervous system, you gotta work it harder than that. It's like being like, "Oh yeah, I worked out four times this month. "Why don't I look better?" So we really have to do the "Sex Magic", like really do it and do it every day if you can. Okay, so what I did was I was like, "I gotta release some stuff "and I gotta release some pain. "I gotta release some grief "and I gotta release some heartbreak." Both from my previous long-term partnership, almost a decade, from some shitty recent dating experiences that I've had that I wished had gone differently. And just a general sense of grief and heartache for me that I could feel that having what I affectionately called daddy issues, but what is really deeply painful of having an abusive biological father, like really accepting how much work I have done, how much I cared, how much I wanted to have amazing partnerships with men, how much I wanted to find my person and how much I hadn't gotten exactly what I wanted. And I knew on some level that was related to being abused by my father and I needed to cry some more about that. I needed to like have some time to reckon with that. So the grieving ritual needs to be a minimum of 10 minutes, but it could go up to an hour. So I would pick some sad-ass music and set a timer and literally put the intention of I want to find my person and show me anything in my body and my energy system in my soul that is in the way. And I will feel it and I will digest it. So in your grieving ritual, you want to do the same thing, right? I want me and my partner to fall back in love. Show me anything that's in the way. I want to be healthy. Show me anything that's in the way. I want to make this amount of money. Show me anything that's in the way because our blockages to what we really want live in our nervous system. They live in our energy body. They live inside of us, sometimes in our mind, right? So when you make that prayer at the start of your grieving ritual, you make yourself available. It's like your system is intelligent. It's listening. It will show you what's in the way. So I would do that. I would set my alarm. I think, you know, sometimes I did an hour of grieving. Sometimes I did 10 or 15 minutes and I would just take some deep, full inhales. I would feel wherever there was sadness and I would let myself cry. I would feel wherever there was heaviness in my heart and I would let myself exhale and move it. Now, the big secret to a grieving ritual is you're not going in being like, get rid of the tears, get rid of the heartache. What you're doing is you're feeling the unfelt things. And when you do this with an attitude of love and presence, those unfelt things will do what is called in the Tantric tradition, they will digest. So just like if you eat a meal, if the meal is amazing and organic and healthy, you will get amazing energy. But even if you eat like fried chicken and french fries and like a whole bunch of stuff that's unhealthy for you, you've still got to digest it, right? You've got to turn it into the fuel that is available to you and you got to move it through your system. So when we have beautiful experiences, we need to digest the beautiful experiences and get and receive energy from them. And when we have negative experiences, we need to digest those as well. The big key to digesting a negative or heavy experience is to be present with your own experience, to love your experience and to open into the feeling of it. This creates the environment, if you will, where your whole system can digest the negative experience. And I'm gonna drink my sex magic. So this is the drink sex magic to go along with the really exquisite practice that you have. And this comes from Mood. You can head on over to shopmood.com and get some of your own sex magic. This is incredible elixir of all activated plants and new ootropics and it tastes delicious and it is like all natural good things. It tastes incredible, but it's sweetened with monk fruit. So, so, so good. Let's recap. So, okay, grieving ritual. You're gonna set your alarm anytime from 10 minutes to an hour. You're gonna pick some sad ass music that you can cry to or scream to or anything like that. And I think I will include a sad ass music playlist in the show notes and the links wherever you can find. If you're like, what is sad ass music? I'll share with you some of mine. And I hit play on the playlist and I start the timer and I say, I want to experience this thing. Please show me what's in the way. And then I open myself into that healing. So I'm gonna be present with myself. I'm gonna be willing to feel. I'm going to love whatever arises and I'm gonna breathe. So don't do intensive breath work if you're pregnant, if you have any kind of medical issue, but you don't have to go really hard with the breath. You can just breathe, inhale fully, exhale fully, let yourself feel. You'd be surprised how much just that simple approach will allow you to digest through experiences. So that's the grieving ritual. Let's take a little pause from the podcast and I'm gonna tell you about my Signature One Year Program. This is the Vita Sucks Love and Relationship Coaching Certification and it is for you if you have dreamed of giving your gifts as a sex, love, and/or relationship coach with a holistic and spiritual lens. This program starts as a personal deep dive allowing you to transform your own experience of sex, love, and relating. It then trains you in a profound methodology that allows you to become a confident and masterful coach and it trains you in business skills so that you can effectively sell your coaching packages to high-end clients in a way that feels heart-centered and filled with soul. If you wanna have a lifestyle that you are super excited about, create your own work hours and have a meaningful impact in the world, go to LaylaMartin.com/VitaCoaching. That's V-I-T-A, LaylaMartin.com/VitaCoaching. The next piece is sex magic. So you can either just sex magic the same thing, the same dream every single day or what I did was I did seven days of grieving, seven days of sex magic, and I took a different quality that I wanted in my partnership for each of the days. Now, for those of you who are new to sex magic, you are going to decide exactly what it is that you want and then you're gonna put yourself into a five senses reality. This makes it super real to your nervous system. Five senses reality is I have this thing that I want, right? So when I was manifesting my partnership, I wanted us to have a tauntric sexual practice, right? That was one of my manifestations. So I closed my eyes and I saw what was happening. We were surrounded by candles. We were making love in yab-yum. There was exquisite decor everywhere, like a really soft faux fur blanket and it was like luscious and we were in a bedroom, right? You see exactly what's happening. Then you hear sounds, right? So I could hear sexy music playing. I could hear the sounds of our pleasure. I could hear him whispering into my ear. I love you, I love our sacred sexuality, right? What do you touch? So I was holding him, right? His gorgeous arms. I could feel his body. That's what I was touching. I could feel my own like skin and hair as I was holding him being held by him, stroking myself, right? The more that you make this sensorial, the more it touches your nervous system and the more safe it feels to your entire being to have it. And safety is the big key for opening the field for our nervous system to have what we want. So then what did I smell? I could smell him. I could smell his sweat. I could smell myself. I could smell the perfume I was wearing. I could smell the incense in the room, right? And what do you taste while I could taste his lips, right? And his tongue was so good. So you do all five senses. What do you see? What do you hear? What do you touch? What do you taste and what do you smell? Because that's what makes it come alive inside of you. It's not just like, oh, I want this partnership. It's like, no, this very specific experience, right? The very specific experience of having the money, the very specific experience of being healthy, the very specific experience of having the best sex ever with your partner. So I did a different quality every day, right? I wanted emotional safety. I wanted a playmate. I wanted to be fully chosen. I wanted to be deeply desired. I wanted us to be magically in love. And I wanted, I actually can't remember the seventh thing now, but that was, you get the idea. And so I did the five senses reality for each specific desire of the partnership and I would do the sex magic. Now, I like quicker sex magic. If you've got all the time in the world by all means, do a half hour sex magic, do an hour long sex magic. Every once in a while, like for the full moon or for an astrological event, I will do like a half an hour to a full hour sex magic, right? We got the candles going, we got the bubble bath or we got the sexy bed situation set up, right? But I live in the real world just like you. Sometimes I got 10 minutes to get in and out and you can do a sex magic in 10 minutes if you want to. Here's how it works, right? Close your eyes, five senses reality, north star prayer. North star prayer means I only want this to manifest in the highest good of all beings. This is my prayer before every sex magic, right? Because I don't want to do black magic. I don't want to override stuff and I'm humble. I don't always know what the highest good is, but I want the highest good. And if it's not in the highest good, I don't want it. So that's always my north star prayer. I highly recommend it. May this only manifest in the highest good of all beings, right? Then three minutes. So you can actually set a timer, insight timer app, recommend it highly. They, you know, everyone's doing these like gentle, peaceful meditations. I use it for that too, but I also love that now there's going to be a whole bunch of us sex, which is out there masturbating to the meditation app, which is great because to me, the different kind of meditation, it's just a pleasurable one. So you can set a timer and you can do, let's say three minutes, if you're doing the super fast version, where it's silence for three minutes and then a bell. And this is where I turn myself on, right? I'm stroking my body. I'm giving myself pleasure. I'm activating myself. And then there is a bell for one bell for each chakra, right? Seven chakras. So first bell goes, and then I am circling my pleasurable energy through my root chakra. Second bell, I'm starting second chakra. Third bell, third chakra, fourth bell, fourth chakra, fifth bell, fifth chakra, sixth bell, sixth chakra, seventh bell. You go all the way to the crown, right? This activates every single part of your body. And so as you're stroking yourself and touching yourself, the energy is cycling through that, what's called a chakra band. It's like the actual band of your body associated with that chakra. You get to the crown, right? The end, that final bell, you're going to go into lift off. That means maximum pleasure or orgasm. The moment you go into peak pleasurable orgasm, you're gonna put yourself into the five senses reality. This seals your manifestation with the highest state of pleasure available to you in that moment. And then you rest and relax, right? So that's usually about 12 or 13 minutes. If you take a bit longer to get into peak pleasure, a bit longer to orgasm, it could be up to 15 minutes. I do a quick little relaxation and then bang, I'm done. That's the kind of sex magic that I can do every single day. You can always do it longer, but I find that's about the shortest that you can clock in and still really do the energy, really do the manifestation and not feel so rushed, but at the same time have an effective practice. It's about 15 minutes. So about 10 minutes for the bells and then five minutes of the peak pleasure and orgasm and then the rest and relaxation afterwards. So I've included a PDF guide in the show notes. Anywhere you can find links around where this podcast is, we have different platforms that we shared on. If you want the guide to this super powerful manifestation. So again, I used this to call in my partner. I did it for the seven days before Burning Man right up until the day that I left for Burning Man. And then I met my partner five days later and it was everything that I had asked for in my manifestation. So I really, really believe in the power of this. I know it in my bones and it's not just, it's called magic, but it's not just magic. It's actually working with some of the most potent forces of the universe. It's working with your erotic power. It's working with your ability to visualize what it is that you want. It's creating a sense of safety in your nervous system. And when you do it this way with the grieving ritual combined with the sex magic, it's allowing you to potently digest and release material from your nervous system that's lower vibration or heavy and replace it with the higher vibration frequencies of pleasure and safety and attuning that released energy to what it is that you're creating and what it is that you really want. This makes your nervous system available for what you want. And also it will seek it in your environment when it feels that it's safe and pleasurable to have it. So enjoy, I would love if you would share with me whenever you manifest and get what it is that you are creating with this ritual, please send me an email. Go to my website, lilamart.com or if you're already signed up on my email list, then go ahead and just hit reply to any email. I would love to hear your stories of success. That would be so incredibly, incredibly magical to hear. And enjoy, it's so powerful to know how deeply you are capable of creating the life that you want and having what you want when you work with the intelligence of your body, with the forces of the universe and with an understanding of what it takes for your nervous system to seek what it is that you really want in this reality. Thank you for listening to this Tantric Life. I am Layla Martin. This is the home for the realist conversations about sex, spirituality, polarity, conscious relationships and all kinds of topics that help us live the absolute most incredible lives. Please check out the next episode. Please go ahead and leave your rating and review on Spotify or Apple or YouTube. It's so, so, so helpful when you do that. If you want to stay connected to me, the most helpful supportive thing you can do is to head over to laylamarton.com, sign up with your email address that connects you to me if you want to study deeper with me, if you want to receive my deeper teachings, I do it predominantly via email. Finally, you can check me out on Instagram @thelaylamarton and thank you so, so, so much for being here. (upbeat music)