My Faith Is My Greatest Mental Game | Closed Fists Block Blessings

Hi family. Welcome back to stay in process. I have missed you guys. I haven't posted a podcast for a minute and just been a crazy month, December was a crazy month for sure. I just think that there's periods where you are out of balance and there's tradeoffs always. I've said that on this podcast before, but there are always, always, always tradeoffs and in this month of December, there were certainly tradeoffs. In my life and one of them was a podcast. We drove home to Colorado. We saw four separate families. I saw five clients. I got to flew. I had the worst recovery that I've ever had in nine years of wearing my whoop. My HRV was nine and my resting heart rate was almost a hundred. Just absolutely destroyed by this sickness, but regardless, I'm happy to be back here. Today's podcast is going to be about open hands versus closed fists and just the importance of faith. I've broken this podcast up into five categories and we'll see how it goes. It never goes exactly to plan, but I have faith in self too. If you've heard that podcast, you know what I'm talking about. So right away, I have been working in the mental game now for four years. I read mental game books in high school. I read them all throughout college. I've loved this stuff forever. My dad and I, when we used to get into it and I would make these comments about the mental game or whatever it is. I was probably a kid. It was probably like 10 years old. He'd say to me, "What, you read that in a book?" He read that in a book, like he would kind of talk some shit to me a little bit. And the answer was, "Yes, it was the only place I had been educated at the time." And my point in sharing that is I've always deeply, deeply cared about the mental game and understood the importance. I understand that you call it baseball. Baseball is 90 percent mental. Most people train the mental game less than 10 percent of the time. And so that's a different percentage for every sport. But the point remains that the mental game is a real thing that you can develop and you can train and as you develop it. I think it's fair to say that the mental game can take you a lot further than at times training the physical game will. So many people are so consumed in more physical, more physical, and more lifting, more ground balls, more reps. And I think sometimes investing in your mental game is a higher return on investment. And so what I'm sharing here is I've really cared about the mental game for a long time. And I've really sought out the answers to the mental game for a long time. And I've learned a lot, like one of the biggest things that I've realized is there's people in this mental game world that will coach it and will make you feel like you have to do 50,000 things to be good in the mental game. Hey, if you don't track 50 habits and you don't have everything scheduled on your Google Calendar and you don't wake up and meditate every single day and you miss a day on your morning pages, you're not going to be great. And that's not mental toughness. That's fragility. Say it again. That's not mental toughness. That is fragility. And that's just not how these games work. You're not going to be perfect. Life's not a game of perfect. So it holds yourself to a perfect standard with your processes unrealistic. What I've learned that the mental game is is teaching people to have trust in themselves, to have trust in their work, to have faith. Now, again, been in the mental game for a long time. This year, honestly, is when I've really started to understand that what is the mental game? It's unwavering faith. And you guys know that I'm somebody who's very grounded by my faith. And so when I say that, I literally mean it's faith in Jesus, it's faith in his path for you. Faith in God's path for you. It's always greater than your path. And I swear on everything I've done all this time researching and recently I've gotten into the Bible in this past year, especially. And of all the books I've ever read, the Bible is the most transformational. And of all the books I've ever read, the biggest conclusion that I came to was the root of confidence that everybody's seeking is faith. The root of courage, which is a requirement, if you're going to be special in your sport or special in anything, you got to be courageous, is vulnerability. But it's really hard to be courageous and vulnerable when you lack faith. It's really hard to be courageous and vulnerable when you just lean on your own understanding. When you lean just on yourself, you're far more consumed in the image and you're far less consumed in the identity. I've talked about on this podcast before, but there's the idea of image versus dust that I learned about that in ruthless elimination of hurry. But it's obviously in Genesis, but it talks about how we're made in the image and we're also made in the dust. When you say we're made in the image, it means that we can create something from nothing. We're made to be creative. We're made to be audacious and bold and create. But we're also made in the dust. We're not made to control everything. We're made to rest. We're imperfect people. We're finite people. We're not an infinite God. Yes, we're made in the image, but we are not God. I read the book "Knowledge of the Holy" and it talks about that often. We're made in the image, but you need to be very clear and humble yourself that you are not God. Again, getting back to the main point here, of all this time I've spent in the mental game, I think that faith is the greatest mental game. It's funny because it was always available for me. It was always there. Now, there's different sides of the mental game, the tactical side, the routines on the field, the process and the systems that you can implement to help you regulate your nervous system. For sure, there's a tactical side. I'm not denying that. Everybody should understand both theoretical and tactical, both philosophical and tactical, whatever you want to call it. Now, above all else, I just think when you have faith, you can do anything. It says in the scripture that if you just have the faith of a mustard seed, you can move mountains. I encourage every single one of you after this podcast to go look up how big is a mustard seed, go see how small it is, and you'll recognize that's all the faith you need to have to be able to do the things that you want to do. That's simple. It's not easy, but it is the only path. That's been something that I've been talking about a lot with my athletes, especially because so many of them, almost all of them, are very faithful and very grounded by their faith. They just have to realize that that's their greatest strength. If you're a believer, if you're somebody who's faithful, who's in the Word, who's doing everything you can, that's your greatest weapon against the world, against the world that makes you want to fall into your flesh, against the world that makes you want to play the games of insecurity and comparison. Your faith is your greatest weapon. It's your greatest strength. The fact that you know Jesus and you know the Word is your greatest strength. That is what will keep you consistent over the course of a season in your life, in your sport, and whatever it is, is being grounded by your faith. I talk to these athletes as they're preparing for their season like this game is going to be a roller coaster, especially in baseball. In baseball, if you succeed as a hitter 30% of the time, you are a hula-famer. That means you're failing 70% of the time. That means that you damn well better have a good relationship with failure. It means that you damn well better worship the right thing. Everybody has a God and even an atheist has a God. They're worshiping something. For some people it's money and for a lot of people it's sports. For me it was baseball. When you're in it, when I was under the cloud, I didn't realize it, but for me it was baseball and you cannot serve two gods. When I was serving baseball, I was not serving God. Here's the thing. You are only as stable as what you worship as the God you serve. If you're going to serve a game where you're going to fail 70% of the time, you're going to be as unstable as the game of baseball is. I think it's just important to recognize that that you are only as stable as what you worship. You are only as stable as the God that you worship. Again, as you go throughout the course of a season, I think it's important that you prime your world, you hack your environment, you get around people that help you live in the desired state that you want to be in. So getting in the word is a requirement for discernment, prayer is a requirement for discernment, slowing down, requirement for discernment, seeking wise counsel is a requirement for discernment. Discernment is to be led by spirit, not by insecurity or flesh, in over a long season where you're going to have failures, you're going to have setbacks, whatever it is, it's important for you to be consistent and unemotional. It's important for you to be led by spirit. And so with that, I listen to James Clear, he went on Diary of the CEO, which is my favorite podcast, and he talks about the power of environment. And he just hammered it home. He's writing atomic habits at the time, and he's never been an entrepreneur, he's never been an author. And so what did he do? He got into a community of people that were authors and were entrepreneurs, and they met frequently, and it held him accountable to his dreams, and it showed him different ways to do it. He learned, but above all else, it kept him consistent, it kept his vision consistent, even during the times of difficulty, he was able to lean on his community, and therefore ended up writing one of the greatest books ever, one of the best-selling books ever in the self-help space, atomic habits. And so he really hammeres home the importance of community. And I just think for somebody who's faith-based, grounded by the word, there's no reason you shouldn't be in a Bible study. Even if it's just you and two of your friends, when I was in college, I turned down every single opportunity to go to a Bible study, and I have no idea why. I never even once considered it. And I just think that that is a community of people pursuing the same thing, which is God, it's not just their sport, they're pursuing God, they're keeping their eyes healthy on him, and that makes it more attainable to be somebody who is consistent. Your environment is that of people who keep the main thing, the main thing, right? And so I do not think that you should rely on willpower, because we are emotional beings, and your ego is fragile, and when you go 0-5 on a Friday night, or you play terrible in your soccer game, or you fumble the football, or whatever it is, it's pretty damn hard to stay consistent with your faith. And I just believe that even after all that, I just said all those failures that could happen, if you have to wake your ass up the next day and go to a Bible study, I think it just makes it easier to get back to neutral. And if you can just endure the ups and downs of a season, and stay consistent, and stay neutral, and collect information, and be eager to take the smallest step forward, that is going to put you in the best position possible to be successful. And so we need to find the systems that actually move the needle, and for me, and for a lot of the athletes that I work with, what I found is the systems that actually move the needle, is the Bible, it's your morning pages, and it's often meditation. Those three habits really move the needle, and then I would add maybe a Bible study on there because of the community aspect. But for you to be consistent, we need to find the process that works, we need to ruthlessly stay in process with that process, right? And so, again, too long didn't listen to what I just said, make it easier to get into your desired emotional state. Your emotional state matters. Mark 1124 tells you, pray as if you've received it, and you will. But then the second part, Mark 11, I want to say 25, says to forgive anybody who is wronged you if you want to be forgiven. And so I was like, why is that in the same paragraph? Why is he talking about forgiveness in the same paragraph as, pray as if you've received it, and you will? Well, Joseph spends it talks about how the language for your mind is your thoughts, the language for your body, which is your unconscious mind, is emotions. When those are going in separate directions, you're in survival. So you can have the thought of, I want to be a big leager, but if emotionally you're frenzied and frantic and angry and resentful, well, when you make it to the big leagues, or you make it to the NFL, or you make it to professional soccer, are you going to be frenzied, angry, and judgemental and resentful? The answer is absolutely not. You would be in an emotional state of all love and gratitude, right? And so in order for us to recondition our body, our unconscious mind, to a new conscious mind, as Joseph spends it says, we need to get our thoughts going in the same direction as our emotions. We need to think like a big leager, we need to think like an NFL wide receiver, and then we need to emotionally feel the emotions of how we would feel when we are an NFL wide receiver or an MLB baseball player. Can you live out the identity and the emotional state of who you want to be prior to the event? That's a question that only you can answer, but the answer that is absolutely, it just takes you staying conscious, intensely conscious, and choosing to think and feel an alignment with who you want to be. That's the man's search for meaning. You always have your choice in between stimulus and response lies your choice. You always have your choice on how you choose to respond. That's Clint Eastwood. He wakes up at 92 years old every single day, he's making a new movie at 92 years old. He wakes up every single day, and he doesn't let the old man in. That was what he said to somebody who said, how are you still making movies at 92 years old? I wake up and I don't let the old man in. And so all that being said, he's choosing to think and feel an alignment with who he wants to be, which is a younger version of himself. Again, Mark 11, 24, and 25 says, praise if you've received it and you will. I think Jesus in that moment is telling you that you need to think in alignment with your goals, but you also need to behave in alignment with your goals. And then in Mark 11, 25, it says to forgive. And the way that I take that is you need to get yourself into an emotional state that aligns with what you're praying for, and resentment is not an alignment with that. Now, fun fact in the artist's way, it also tells you that you will never create at the level that you want to create at when you are resentful. So I just think it's funny how these all overlap. You guys know me. I'm a sucker for overlapping principles. And so Mark 11, 24 through 25 reminds us that we need to get our emotional state, our thoughts and our behaviors and alignment with where we want to go. And if we have unwavering faith in that, we'll receive it. Right. And that's all that neuroplasticity is. Neuroplasticity says that your brain rewires based on thoughts, emotions and behaviors, also experiences, but thoughts, emotions and behaviors. And that's all he's saying in the scripture. Right. So it's just it's humbling in those moments to to know the scripture and to be grounded by it, because I think it's the greatest mental game. And if you know the scripture, then then you have all the mental game that you need, really, really, and that's coming from somebody who works in the mental game. And so with that, I want to say, as you go into season last last part of that, just make sure that you are a part of a group that that brings you closer to that and reminds you of these things. We have to be reminded more than we have to be taught. So my second point that I want to mention here is just understanding your default. Obviously, a lot of my athletes are in season going into season. I just my job is to make people consciously competent. And when people come to me a lot of the time, they're unconsciously incompetent, or maybe they're consciously incompetent. They know that they don't know. And when they're consciously competent, they know and they know also how to respond. They're competent. They know how to manage the moment. That's that's kind of my job is giving them the skills. Right. And so as I'm saying this, like understand your default. As you come in, I'm trying to make these unconscious patterns that you have abundantly conscious. And when you make them conscious and you can be aware of them, like I said, you can intentionally choose to behave and align it with who you want to be. You can intentionally choose to put your focus in a place that aligns with where you want to go. Right. That's always up to you. And so with that, once you know this, once you know your tendencies, it's your job to understand your defaults and to consciously choose to behave differently. I wrote about this in my morning pages today. When I get sped up when sorry about that, when things are going fast for me, my default is to cling onto control. Once again, image and dust. I cling on to control my that my inner voice is saying, hey, Drake, you're not doing enough. You're not doing enough. You don't wake up early enough. My dude, I wake up at 5 30 almost every day. I woke up at 3 a.m. today. Couldn't fall back and sleep. But like that's my voice. You're not organized enough. You're not working hard enough. You're not consistent enough. You need to do more. You need to do more. That's self one guys. That's your sensor. If you've been here, you know what I'm talking about. That is your sensor. That's what I'm trying to train you all to do is to be able to recognize that voice. Nobody's going to save you. But once you can recognize that voice, you can actually take the steps forward to change yourself to rewire your brain to change your life. That's up to you. But you have to be aware of it first conscious. And so again, what is my default? I'm telling you guys know your default. It's to close my fists. That's where the title of this podcast came from. It's to lean into the image too much. The control trying to make things happen. When really I should be leaning more towards the dust, which is open hands. When I'm when I'm moving fast, I cling on the control. I cling on the material things. That's when you start becoming money focused, right? This is when you're in survival. Remember that survival is selfish. Survival is a is a narrow focus. And I'm not saying that in a good way. A narrow focus means there's only one way to do it. I saw this shirt yesterday. It was somebody that said, my way and it has one butterfly and it says God's way. It has like a thousand butterflies. Right. And so it's it's letting go of the need to understand right in this in the scripture. It says things are impossible for man, but nothing is impossible for God. Right. It tells you to not lean on your own understanding. And so in these moments like I'm sped up. I want to cling on to these material things like money. It puts me in survival. It puts me selfish and in a selfish state. I think there's one way to do it. I'm worried about the who what when where why, which is a telltale sign of survival. And I know it about myself now. I'm consciously aware of it. I've done a lot of work in this past year to learn those things about myself. And it's still terrifying in moments to catch myself after days of being in survival and recognize that I've been in survival recognize that I'm I'm clinging on to control. And I guess all I'm trying to say is it's it's counter intuitive actually in everything I've ever learned like me clinging on to control doing more trying harder self one tries hard. Self one tries to control every single aspect. Open hands is complete surrender and complete detachment. Right. Matthew 183 talks about being child like how that's the path to heaven. And to be child like is to be dependent on the Lord. It's to be completely dependent. It's to not seek rank or status. It's to not have a need to come across like you have all the answers. And that's what I'm trying to do with open hands is understand that I'll do the work I'll do I'll pray I'll do the work or a laborer and then I'll surrender the rest I will have complete open hands. And and give my life to you give my life to him completely surrender it whatever he has planned for me as far greater than what I have planned for me to summarize point to understand your default. Make it make it conscious and when you make it conscious over time you will get better at catching yourself in the beginning I might catch myself after a week of being miserable. I just told you that this morning my morning pages I caught myself after three days or so two days. And it's just terrifying how easy it is to go back there and so you must overcome yourself every single day you must deny yourself every single day if you want to keep your hands open. If you want to keep your eyes healthy keep them on the Lord right keep your intention clean the inside of your cup and the rest of your world will be clean. But that all starts with you understanding your default staying conscious staying consistent with your process of overcoming yourself and denying yourself and choosing to have faith. So I wrote down as point three that I'm at my best when I have open hands I wrote down to deny yourself and pick up your cross. I was getting ready for that speech that I was going to give and I was so nervous and I wrote on my hand deny yourself pick up your cross follow him. Denying myself looks like denying my own insecurity my own flesh my flesh wants to panic right picking up my cross looks like whatever he has planned for me I'm going to do it with conviction intention and execution and with precision I'm going to work heartily for the Lord and not for man right and then follow him obviously you know what that means I wrote down on my hand though because it reminds me every single day to deny myself. My flesh wants easy my flesh wants control my flesh wants to understand and I have to deny that every single day I got to wake up and overcome myself which again the Bible prayer slowing down wise counsel morning pages these are all systems to overcome myself daily. I wrote down also Matthew 18 three I talked about that it's a complete dependence that is what open hands look like it and I don't just mean like hey I'm going to surrender so I get what I want no it's I'm going to surrender because I believe that God's path for me is greater than my path and I'm going to to deny my own yearnings and my own desires desire is just a contract to be unhappy until you get what you want. So I'm going to deny those I'm going to have a clear vision of who I want to be but if it's not for me I don't want it right I don't want it. So I wrote down also wanting his well his will over your will I wrote down making yourself less right when you make yourself less and make him more that's when the blessings occur. But here's a thing when people lean too far into the image when I lean too far into the image I always think about it as a space of work and execution I'm taking up all the space and I'm leaving no space for God to work. And what I found is that for people that are faithful the unknown is exhilarating and for people that lack faith the unknown is terrifying and so if you have faith I encourage you to leave a space for God to work. Leave space for him to work in your life do that do your part but also leave space for the mystical leave space for the mystery leave space for him to work. And I think when you do that at least from my experience and what I've seen with the athletes that I work with that that's a sign of faith right. To leave space for him is a sign of faith in my opinion and when you show that you have faith I think that's when the blessings occur in your life. There's a there's a verse in in this kind of goes into point four point four was faith is a requirement and I'm skipping ahead but there's a verse from mark six one through six. So I don't have the whole verse but it's talking about how Jesus goes home to Nazareth and his family like people closest to him deny him he returns in Nazareth where he's raised he teaches in the synagogue and reads from Isaiah declaring the prophecy fulfilled in himself. And these people almost are offended they're like is in this Joseph son they say isn't this the carpenter so what they lack faith and so what's Jesus's response in mark six four. It says a prophet is not without honor except in his hometown among his relatives and in his own household so just make note of that typically the people that are the last to believe are the ones that are closest to you that's a tangent. But then he also says that he performed few miracles because of their lack of faith again scripture explicitly says that the consequence of their lack of faith is few miracles their unbelief limits what he does in Nazareth which is insane to me right Jesus actually chose to do less miracles in Nazareth because they lacked faith. So faith is a requirement to get to where you want to go at least to the level that you want to get to faith is a requirement to endure these ups and downs of life of the sports of whatever you're doing there's ups and downs and when you have faith it makes it all the more attainable to stay consistent and to stay grounded. And that is what it looks like to be a high achiever is to be consistent on emotional and high stress moments and grounded to be faithful so again Jesus cannot will not bless you. At the level that you want if you lack faith right now here's another story from the Bible it's the parable the Sower and it's phenomenal it's one of my favorite stories in the Bible but the parable the Sower talks about a Sower who is trying to sow his seed and he's he's basically planting these seeds on different soils. And now what we have to understand is a soil represents your heart condition the Sower is obviously Jesus it's Christ and by extension anyone who speaks the truth and the seed is obviously the truth it's the word the Sower is indiscriminate he does not check readiness he doesn't manage outcomes right and I just think that immediately. The word is is for everybody he doesn't discriminate so he's he's dropping these seeds I want to say he drops them on like a harder surface and these birds come down and swipe the seed away now the surface that is hard represents a cynical cynical heart posture a unbelieving questioning heart now the birds represent distractions they represent the evil of the world that will. Steele God's grace from you right and so if the hard ground is pride it's cynicism it's habitual patterns you're not going to receive it right you will not receive God's blessings because you're closed off and then these these distractions and in your life this noise is a distraction the arrogance that is the birds are stealing God's grace before you even get a chance to feel it right now the second soil that it lasts. The second soil that it lands on is rocky soil it's emotional but it's unruited and so the seed lands on the rocky soil it blooms and then the sun comes and it burns the the harvest up immediately why because it's shallow it's shallow it's not rooted it's not grounded. The example that I would give here of what this means is this is the individual that receives the word with excitement there's immediate excitement there's an emotional high right there's identity change without foundation right and so when when trouble or persecution comes because of the word they quickly fall away. And so these are the individuals again that are excited by the word but when when hardship occurs faith fates we've all been there the next one is a third thorny soil. And this is this is where the soil choke or I'm sorry the the thorns choke the the seed from flourishing right the the thorns choke us from receiving God's grace from receiving God's word right the soil receives the seed and keeps it but it never bears fruit it's distraction right the thorns represent distraction now I looked up what what are the distractions that it's talking about. Well the thorns might be your anxiety it might be money status control your ego productivity right just being productive being busy right God the devil doesn't need to make a sin he just needs to make us busy and so that is the thorns that are suffocating the seed and not allowing it to bear fruit right. Now the last soil is good soil this is a receptive obedient patient dependent heart posture right. This is the heart posture that that blooms and what it says in scripture is is that the the return on investment the the harvest that they are reaping is 30 to 60 to 100 times what they expected right 30 to 60 to 100 X and that is proof that God's blessings are always greater than what you could ever imagine his path for you is is greater than your path for you that you could argue that it's 30 60 or 100 X greater than what you can imagine. And so I just love that parable because it shows you that when you have a humble and receptive heart and when you have faith in the word and you live by the word you're building a house on a solid foundation but when you know the word and you still choose to go against the word you're building a house on a foundation that is sand so for example Joshua one nine it tells you it's a commandment to not be discouraged or afraid I always go back to that. Like when you still choose to lean into the flesh and the insecurity your your house is built on a foundation that is sand and it will wash away with the storms that will inevitably come. And so hear the word know the word and live by the word it's the truth right heaven and earth will pass away but the word is forever and when you do this Mark 1124 praise if you receive it praise if you have it and you'll receive it. While I'm going fast Mark 1124 says praise if you've received it and you will right when you when you're living by the word and your courageous and you're living by spirit and you're not afraid and you're keeping your eyes healthy on him and you're keeping the inside of your cup clean there's a good chance that your blessings are 30 60 or 100 X what you could ever imagine I just think that's crazy right. And so again to conclude that that point number four when you lack faith you block your blessings faith is a requirement in the mental game faith is a requirement in your process you're not always going to see progress right away have faith endure compound interest do it for do it for decades same concept just not faith based but same concept you have to have faith in the process. And so I think for anybody that's out there that's faith based I just wholeheartedly encourage you to go read up on the parable the slower read the gospel know what Jesus says know who Jesus is and do everything you can to keep your eyes healthy and to. Focus on his path for you open hands it's easy to go close fist keep those hands open now my last and final point I just wrote down or at labor and to remind you guys that means pray and work God I'll take care of the quantity you'll take care of the quality right the process is up to me the outcome is up to God same concept right I wrote down that faith is work for sure faith is work to follow God is work the book knowledge of the Holy says blessed are the pure in heart for that for they shall see God no matter how brightly God's light may shine only those who are spiritually prepared to receive it will will receive it will see it. And so these people that tell me that they don't see God they don't feel God I just remind them of that that blessed the pure in heart for they shall see God. And that same in that same page and knowledge of the Holy it talks about how the answers to God are not on the surface they're not they're sought out through through meditation on the written word they're sought out through labor and the last one it says is reverent seeking it's saying that different than how it does in the book I can't remember how it says it. But again God is not hiding out of cruelty he's hidden the filter out the casual you will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart says that in scripture. And so I just I think that's amazing God is on the present he's always there but it's up to you to be spiritually prepared to receive that to see him. And you have to do the work and you have to practice discernment you have to be in the word you have to know who Jesus is right that is in my opinion the labor part it's keeping your eyes healthy on God every single day when you wake up. Recommitting to that that's the labor part that's a daily decision to deny yourself to overcome yourself right and I and people message me all the time how do you talk about overcoming yourself how how do you do it again. Get in your Bible pray do your morning pages slow down give yourself a chance to listen morning pages are listening process I often read the Bible and it's exactly that it's a listening process what what what do I need to hear in this moment right listen and prayer just sit and stillness and listen for him. Listen to yourself like I think that is how you overcome yourself every single day but if you allow your environment to determine your inner world good luck. Right so that's the labor you got to wake up every day and go get it you got to keep your eyes healthy says in the scripture that when your eyes are healthy the rest of your world will be healthy you have to wake up and kill your flesh and deny yourself every single day and pick up your cross. Simple not easy right now my last point that I would say is I just think that anybody that's a believer should educate themselves I'm trying to educate myself every single day. I watched this podcast by it was Jeremiah Johnson and Tucker Carlson and they're talking about the shroud of turn which is basically a cloth that went over this crucified man and when they inverted the image of the of the cloth it was like a spitting image of Jesus right so I listen to this podcast and it teaches about the crucifixion couple fun facts for you that aren't so fun. Did you know that Jesus was whipped naked imagine that he's completely naked and they whip every single inch of his body every inch and on the ends of these whips are these little balls it's not metal but it basically is metal and these balls are like sticking in his skin and they're ripping them out. I believe that when he stood before everybody before the crowd he had already lost a third of his blood which is insane a third of his blood and what did they chant to him what they chant they chanted crucify him and they ended up letting a murderer I think his name is bearabis but bearabis I never say his name right but they let the murderer this this rapist go and they crucified Jesus instead. They say crucify him crucify him after he's lost a third of his blood humbling what was his what was his his crime is nothing he did nothing wrong and on the on the tomb I believe they wrote down king of Jews that was his crime which is insane and so they yelled crucify him he put him up on that cross did you know that they they put a put a crown of thorns on him. But wait a minute it's not the crown of thorns that you're thinking about right now did you know that it was a helmet and they shoved it down on his head insane shoved it down on his head and they put the nails through his hands and they put the nails through his feet and I believe this isn't I'm not completely confident in this I believe I heard this in there the nail goes through his heel which fulfills scripture it goes through his heel imagine that his heels. So he's got these these nails through his through his hand slash wrist and his heels and his feet and his heels and he's sitting with this this crown on his head and the person that's getting crucified next to him is also cursing him how about that there's a guy that's about to die on the cross and he's also cursing Jesus. And in that moment with Jesus asked God to do his father please forgive them for they do not know what they're what they have done amazing it's just humbling every time I hear that and I also learn that the crucifixion what crucifixion actually is is suffocation he's suffocating on that cross and so every time that he would wiggle up to breathe just imagine that he's going into the crowns more. And as he breathes out and he relaxes that nail is ripping through his skin even more even more and I just think when I learn about this and I learn about the shroud of turn and I learn about the facts of the crucifixion. It humbles me and I show up with a little bit more respect for the word and I show up with a little bit more obedience and trust and faith Jesus got on the cross and was slaughtered was crucified in the most gruesome way they beat him to a pulp he lost a third of his blood they whipped him every inch of him. And he still was forgiving and yet we we think that our sin is greater than his blood it just always humbles me but when I when I learn and educate myself on these things all it does is make me have more conviction in my faith it makes me have more faith in faith and it makes it more attainable for me to not be afraid and not be discouraged and to just follow the word into into. Again have faith so as we wrap up this podcast and we're getting ready to enter into 2026 my question for you is what would it look like to be more obedient what would it look like to be more dependent on the Lord what would it look like to not put on a facade that you have all the answers and to humble yourself before the Lord. What would it look like to be more a lion to be more convicted to be more committed to be more bold in your faith. That's a question that I'm wrestling with and reflecting on and that's a question that I think everybody should reflect on. Now how I'm going to end this podcast is with one of my favorite Bible verses it's Matthew 514 through 16 I've shared it on here before but you can never hear it enough. He says you are the light of the world the town built on a hill cannot be hidden neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl and said they put it on its stand and it gives light to everyone in the house in the same way let your light shine before others that they may see your good deeds and glorify your father in heaven. So that they may see your good deeds and glorify your father in heaven shine God's light when I say what would it look like to be more dependent more bold more convicted what would it look like for you to shine his light brighter. I used to dim my light I used to play small because I was scared of what flesh would think of what people would think. And I promise you this if you put your worth and your value in people you will always be let down if you put your faith in yourself you will always be let down because you'll be relying on your own understanding. And so just as it says in the scripture it says you don't put a bowl over a lamp just as a town on a hill cannot be hidden shine God's light boldly shine it brightly if you are a believer your faith should make non believers question their non believing. That's my greatest purpose that's my greatest mission is to encourage people to lean more into their identity and less in their image and to shine his light brightly and to be bold in your faith don't be lukewarm be bold have conviction because if you know the truth you know the word and you live by the word it's solid foundation and you'll endure any storm. Because God is for you who could be against you but if you know this stuff and you choose to still go against it and lack faith and be disobedient like you're building a house on a foundation that is sand I'm grateful for you guys. I love you guys I just in every day in awe and gratitude for what Sip is and the people that I get to connect with and this this audience that I've got to build of people that love God the way that I love God and care about the mental game and the way that I care about the mental game. I just and every day in awe and with everything I have all of it came the day that I opened my hands and I said whatever you have planned for me I just want to glorify you I want to be the best I can be for you and just put me in a position to serve and to shine your light brightly and to bring people closer to you that was the prayer and my whole life changed everything in my life changed after that. And it was only when I finally let go and I finally opened my hands and let him take me where he took me so I hope that this is a little nudge for you to be more bold and to have some more faith because the faith your faith is your mental game and with it with a faith of a mustard seed you can move a mountain so if you enjoyed this all that I ask you to do is send this is somebody who needs to hear it. As I reflect back in my career it was really lonely at times and I didn't have anybody that told me to keep my eyes healthy and to humble myself and stop leaning on image too much stop trying to control everything and be more dependent nobody told me that I just sometimes reflect like how much would my life look different how much different my life be if I would have had somebody that just would have shared a resource like this with me. And so I just ask you to do your part and if you found any value in this whoever just popped in your head to send this to I just ask you to send it to them and spread God's love because again you are the light of the world in a town built on a hill cannot be hidden neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl instead they put it on its stand and they give it they give light to everyone in the house in the same way you the listener let your light shine before others so that they may see your good deeds and glorify your father in heaven. and heaven. I love you guys. Appreciate you guys. Stay in process. Talk to you soon. See you.