Minced Grogu (ft. guest, Sigourney Weaver)

[Music] Our podcast this week we have Sigourney Weaver for reasons unknown. Not for reasons unknown. She's the star of the Mandalorian and Grogu. Plus, the usual news and nonsense on the movie podcast that is begging audiences at can and other film festivals to stay in your goddamn seats and stop it with the tedious standing ovation contest. There Chris said my piece. Incredible introduction. Oh thank you James. Oh standing. Thank you Helen. Join me. Join me. That's awesome. Standing we are all standing. Guys guys please be seated. Oh the fact that neither of you got out of your seat you couldn't even be ours to do that. That is an absolute disgrace. Anyway hello pod welcome to the Emperor podcast. My name is Chris Hewitt. I've never done that order before. Okay. I felt new and dangerous. You normally say I'm Hewitt Chris. Hello pod I'm Chris Hewitt. Welcome to the Emperor podcast. But this week I said hello pod. Welcome to the Emperor podcast I'm Chris Hewitt. Wow. It's only said I can have many episodes when it makes me up the formula. What a time to be alive. I feel unmoored. Anything could happen in this episode. Except for the fact I'm joined by the same people I'm joined by every week. We've heard them already. Geek Queen Helena Hara is here. Hello. How I mean we've spent all morning together. I know how you are but for the people at home that's for the tedious obligation of getting the small talk out of the way. How are you Helen? I'm good. I'm excited about a bank holiday weekend. I'm going to spend it by the seaside with my small niece and nephew. We're going to get ice cream ice cream ice cream ice cream. We all scream for ice cream. We do. Yeah. And possibly the goals that sometimes steal the ice cream from us. The goals. The goals. Yes. When the sea goals follow the troller, it is because they feel that sardines will be thrown into the sea. That sounds profound but I think that's largely just the way you said it. No, it was something that Eric Cantina said at his, I'm slightly paraphrasing. It didn't get exactly right. But Eric Cantina at the former Manchester United footballer who of course subscript became an actor of some repute when he was banned years ago for kung fu kicking a man in the stands. I remember that. And his, I think, return press conference. The press brought the, oh, Eric, are you sad and blah, blah, blah, blah, he went when the sea goals follow the troller. It is because they think the sardines will be thrown into the sea. So profound. I mean, we should still sit here and think on that for a while. Yeah, shall we? Yeah. James Dyer is also here. He is the mad Titan of movies. How are you? I'm good. Thank you, Chris. We just saw a film because we did. We did. We did. But we can't just saw a film. Do we sign things? We did. I signed the thing. Did you not sign the thing? I signed. I don't know what it is. You did sign. I did sign. The social embargo is up. So we could, I think, probably say what we saw. Can we? Well, it's had social embargoes up. Oh, I'm scared of that. Yeah, I'm scared. I'm cringer. Yes. Cringing, cringing. I wouldn't want Skeletor to come and get us. Right. Exactly. Yeah. All right. Let's err on the side of caution then, shall we? You're just ram man through. All right. Evil Helen. [LAUGHTER] Oh, it was Masters of University. Anyway. Shall we have a question? That is our want. Is it want or won't? Our want. I say want. I say want. I say it's want. What is spelled W-O-N-T? Yes, want. Want. Brice said that's want. No, it's want. You see, I think it's want. Boy, he always says won't. And he got in my head a little bit. And I stopped saying the word altogether because I wasn't sure which way to fall. I think it's want. I hope you have emboldened me. I think it's want or emboldened you. [LAUGHTER] Another great pronunciation. For James, you are yourself emboldened. I am emboldened. Yeah, that's true. I'm emboldened. Mm-hmm. Okay. Helen's got a full head of hair. Fuck you, Helen. All right. Sure. Can you spare some hair? All right. Okay. That's good Instagram. Shall we have a last week's question, which comes from J. Wettine Steel. Thank you. That's a great username. If you had to predict the 2026 worldwide box office top three-- [CLEARS THROAT] Shall we say about the top three at the moment? Yes. As of the time of recording, 13 minutes passed for-- no wait, four minutes passed 13 on Thursday, the 21st of May, and the year of our Lord, 2026, the top three movies in the worldwide box office at present are in number three, Project Hell Mary, with 669 million. Nice. At number two, Michael, which is packing them in around the globe with 713 million and might make a billion. And the Super Mario Galaxy movie is number one at the moment. It put 967 million. I was-- I was for a second. I was hoping that it might slow down and not hit a billion, but it is going to hit a billion. It hasn't yet. It will. It might fall down a pipe. You don't know. Oh, it's 133 million away. That's it. I know. It's so soul-crushing. I'm behind one of those three, but unfortunately, it's the one in third place. The other two, I want to-- anyway. So I would like to hope that-- well, first of all, that they re-release Project Hell Mary, and everyone who didn't go see it the first time goes and sees it and gets a number up a bit. But I realized that's a long shot. It's interesting, because at the top three of the moment, Project Hell Mary, Michael, Super Mario Galaxy movie, not a billion, but I expect-- I expect there will be at least one or two billion dollar movies by the end of the year. Last year, of course, the Apple Card was upset because last year, at the World Wide Box Office, for the first time ever, the number one film of the year was not an American movie. No. It was a Chinese movie. Nezato. Nezato. Which made 2.2. Billion dollars worldwide. Comfort will be ahead of the No. 2 spot, which was "Sutopia 2", which was itself. 3 spot, "Avatar Fire" and "Ash". Interestingly, most of that money was made in China domestically. There doesn't seem to be a Nezato yet. Nezato? But things are changing, I think, in terms of the global box office landscape. So there might be a Chinese movie that comes through and does absolute gangbusters business over there. Doesn't really make a dent worldwide, but doesn't have to. It doesn't matter. Because the main load is money. Pegasus 3, which is a Chinese movie, is fourth on a list at one book with $653 million. But we don't seem to have that rocket ship taking off just yet. We don't do. I think the big question for me is what Odyssey ends up doing. Yes. Because if you'd asked me if Oppenheimer would make a billion at the box office, I'd have said, "There are not in a million. " You would say yes. No. Oh, right. You're enough. Yes. No, I would have said. No, I wouldn't have said it. Yeah, I would have said it would have been. Because it felt to me it's quite a niche audience, very adult, very thinky kind of. It's not for everyone, right? The thing looking at the box office so far, this year that depresses me the most is, we talk about how IP is king and quality and making good films is very much secondary. But you only have to look at the one and two spots to see that that is resoundingly true. Because Super Mario Galaxy Movie with the best will in the world is fucking dog shit. But is significantly down on the first movie? It would significantly worse than the first movie. Wow, that sounds something. Well, it is. Like it's genuinely horrific. It's barely even a film, but it's done very, very well. Michael has it baked in fans. People are going to love it. If you love Michael Jackson, you'll probably love it despite it being immensely boring. But again, another film that critics have hated, but everyone's gone to see regardless because you have that built-in fan. But then you have Project Hell Mary, which came out nowhere. It came out, it is based on IP. But that's not a novel, of course. Yeah, I suppose you're right. It is still, I would say, from most people, an original film. It's thought-provoking, it's philosophical, it's kind of hard sci-fi-esque. If you don't take into account a little rock monster, cute merchandise, obviously going in his favour. But it has heart, but it's not what you would call a traditional, break out for Quadrant Popcorn movie. Oh, okay, this is good. I'm going to ask you guys in a second. I'm going to go through a couple of films. Let's start off with a film that's out this week. And usually, we have Star Wars in the title of your movie. That's a license to print credits. The Mandalorian and Grogo Hell's bells. It's apparently tracking to open quite soft as these things go. This was a couple of weeks ago, but it was going to track around 80 million in the states, which ain't great. I'll be honest. It feels to me like it's going to be 5,600, not opening weekend, like overall. Okay. That's just how I feel. 400. 400. I'm not bidding downwards. It's not like a love-scold big win. I, yeah, I mean, we'll get onto the reasons where I bid later in the show, but I'm going to stake my claim on 400. Oh, okay. All right. I'm going to split the difference. So I think it might be about 450, 450. Yeah, I don't, I don't know how it's going to play long term. What sort of legs it's going to. I think I think, regardless of the quality that we will get into later, I think there are some fundamental issues that will discourage people from going to see it. Yes, it's the full front nudity. It is definitely the full front. Oh, yeah, that's going to discourage people. Okay, sure. Yeah. No one. needs to see Spaceballs. Everyone needs to see Spaceballs. That's the whole reason they're making a new one. All right, disclose your day. Spielberg. Spielberg, you know he has my heart and I love him to death and I don't know if this is currently has got enough kind of impetus behind it. I don't feel like people outside of Phil nerds like me who will go see anything Spielberg makes. You know, I don't know that the ups well of opinion is there. Having said that, if it gets incredible reviews, I can see it making an impact and I can see it catching on in the same way that Project Helmeri did. You know what I mean? Like so I can see it doing, I think there's a definite sort of Project Helmeri sort of 500 million scenario for that. Okay, 500 mil James. Less than three. Less than $3. No, no one will go to no. I'm saying less than 300 million. Wow. Yeah. Okay. All right. Toy Story 5. Over a billion? I've around a billion. I don't know. I feel like Toy Story 4. Well, maybe this is just me, but I think Toy Story 4 damaged the franchise a little bit. What did it do? What did Ford do over a bill over a cool bill? So I think this will be either just undraw just over. Yes. I believe in staking my colors to the master. Oh my god. That's what I said. Careful, don't get splinters in your arse. All right. Yeah, there's 1.073 last one. I think Toy Story 5. I think you're looking at 950. Really? I'm going to go 1.2 bill. Oh, better than Toy Story 4. It will be better than Toy Story 4. It's a dreaded by understand. That is true. Who is this? Super girl. Super girl. I am more excited. I think this film will be better than Superman. Make it that statement. What you will. So I'm going to say high 300s. High 300s. That seems low to me. Hells bells. I'm an optimist. I'm going to say more like 600. That's very optimistic. Well, the wonder woman did 700 in change. So many of the monsters over a bill. A bill. A bill. A bill. A cool bill. I'm going to say. Yeah. Oh, no. Do you know what I'm going to say 950? Okay. 950. I like that. I think it's going to be over a bill. Moana. Make way. Make way. Over a bill. Just about a bill. About a bill. Yeah. I think it's going to come under 100. I'm going to say 800. And the reason I think that is I don't think the trader went down at all. Well, and I think that will put some people off. All right. You forget how hard it is to keep small children under. That is true. I don't stop crying. I'm going to say it. The Odyssey over a bill. I don't know about. Well, I think it's really performance dependent for this one. I think. Yes, and then that's the whole point. I think in terms of like I think this is one where the reviews matter. I think that Christopher Nolan's name gets it to probably 750 on its own. But I think after that, it depends on having the usual level of Christopher Nolan reviews. So not tenant reviews. But like Oppenheimer reviews. I think it's going to be really good. I'm really looking forward to it. I think the trailer was underwhelming. And I understand why it's going because I think he's trying to keep his power to dry. He doesn't want to show off. You know, all of his various cyclopsies and whatnot. I'm going to say, if it breaks a billion, it'll be just over. If it doesn't, then just thunder. That's mad. You should have thought of this for a nice location. We're often. But do you think it's going to be the most lucrative money-spinning Tom Holland's and Dea John Brinthall movie of July? Or Will and the Spider-Man? I think it's going to be Spider-Man. Unless the Odyssey has a real good day. All right. After top of your head, what did no way home do? 1.9. 1.9. I think it's going to be 1.5. Yeah. I feel, I feel, yeah, I feel. I think 1.9 obviously had the big attraction of spiders. Yeah, lots of spiders. Well, I don't want to spoil the film for anyone, but, you know, I think I'm going to be slightly more conservative and say 1.2. Oh, because I think, you know, I just, I'm not sure the excitement for cinema is there this year. So I wonder whether it will get people to look in this way. Also, you've got the whole, you know, attrition of Marvel effect, which I think will hurt it. So far from home. You could be right. Yeah. Far from home. Only two Spider-Man films have made a billion. First one was Far From Home and that was coming right off the back of Endgame. Yeah. And got over a billion. And then obviously, no way home had it. It's big marketing, hook that wasn't in the marketing, but once we're to got out, the opening weekend was huge. But I think people went back again and again and again for the three Spider-Man. That doesn't seem to be a big selling point here. So I'm also going to, I think it's going to be one between 1.2 and 1.4. Yeah. I think the thing they've got going for them. Obviously, we have this Marvel problem at the moment, but I think the thing they've got going for them is there has not been a bad Spider-Man film within the MCU. Oh, within the MCU. Obviously, that's not bad Spider-Man films, but not within the MCU. And I think he has, I think he's a enormously likable on screen. Also, as has been proven by everyone's Instagram feeds, he's enormously likable full stop. And him and Zendaya are like the couple. And I think that will go massively in his favor. Young audiences will fall to see them as much as they will the IP. So yeah, I think this weirdly, I think this is almost a safer bet than Doomsday. There are three more biggies and they're all in December. Yeah. Which means they could cannibalize each other. Obviously, we have the Doomsday, a double bombing of June Part Three and, or is it June Chapter Three, no June Part Three and Avengers Doomsday. And then we have the next two man, you film. This is what we have Christmas Day and those two movies previously have done very, very well, but not hit a billy. They haven't hit a billy. No, we have this one. It's going to hit a billy. I close like 800 million, 700 billion something like that. Close-ish. As close as I'll ever get to a billion. But I mean, I think some of the momentum's probably been lost because it's been a while. Has been a while. Yes. I don't know like 600 maybe. 600 James is going 600 with Jumanji. Hi, hi, hi, that is 600. Hi, that is Jumanji. Helen, what are you thinking? I think six times is probably on the high end, but yeah, that's possible. All right. Okay, let's get to the big two then. Okay. Doomsday and June. June, honestly, so the last one was 700 and change. Yeah. I think it might, if it does the same, it'll be doing well. I don't think it's going to go much higher than that. I'm going to stick with 700 for this. I think if you infer penny, infer pound, I think if you watch the first two, you're going to watch the third one. That said, the story of June Messiah, I, in my personal opinion, isn't as strong as the story of the original June. But I'll be interested to see how it falls. Obviously, I will go and see it about 700 million times. That's going to help. That'll put over the top. Yeah, I think so. So all right. And doomsday. What do we think doomsday is going to be? It's I think this is really, really hard to say. Highly libeley. I would say. I think so. Certain. If it doesn't do higher than a billion, then we have like real crisis. Less than two. I think that noise you'd hear would be the MCU packing up and going home for a while. I'll think about itself for a bit if it does because they have thrown a bill. Everything including the kitchen sink and probably a bill. At the moment, it feels like less than two. At the moment, it feels just like reading the wind and like throwing pieces of grass up in the air. Yeah. It feels like maybe 1.8. Because the momentum has slowed massively. But if Spider-Man really hits and has a sort of, you know, doomsday sting on the end or something like that, maybe we revise that upwards. Yeah, perhaps. I think you can't compare it to Infinity War and Endgame because again, they were surfing away. Yeah. And there was so much momentum and so much goodwill behind those films. That said, the re-release of Infinity War, I think will help. And then the game. And then game with extra footage, mainly just the three of us going squee-ing the audience of Hawkeye stepping his toe. But I mean, that will probably help. But yeah, I don't see this doing over two unless the word of mouth is absolutely out. I think it's the only film we've discussed so far that has the potential to do over two, but I don't think it could. Yeah, I think it could. So what number are we landing on? If we have to 1.999. I said 1.8 and I think that's about right at the moment. Yeah, at the moment. Yes. All right. So let's get back to the question. Do you remember the question? No, I know. All those years ago, what is your top three go in order? Well, I've kind of done it, but Avengers, doomsday, and then Spidey. Spidey. Spidey. And then one of the Disney's, but I'm going with or cartoons, but I'm going with minions. Even I think one of my two that I'm still not convinced by my honor. Say it's super girl. It's definitely not going to be super girl. Apart me really. Just desperately hopes it's not going to be super. If it is, then something's going to hurt me. Well, yeah, that's quite possible. But so many things have gone horribly wrong in the world, Chris. That's true. Name one. Don't name it. I think it's most likely to be minions. Yeah. Number one. No, no, three. As an after. So you're still saying, I think, I think, for me, like brand new day, I think I'm fairly comfortable where we said it would land. I think that's the kind of the safest bet. I think Doomsday could go either way, but I think those two are going to be one and two. I do. All right. I think it's going to be Doomsday. Yeah. I'm going to find my brand new day. And then obviously Clayface. All right. Good stuff. Well, don't discount. Don't discount the power of Ariana Grande fans and Ben Stiller fans and Robert De Niro fans and Terry Pellet. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. One of those fandoms is substantially bigger and more terrifying than the others. Yeah. You do not want to cross Terry Pellet or no. No, Terry. No. It's very easy. They're easy to find though. Anyway, okay. I'm going to call you Chris at this moment and say, I refer you to what I'm holding up on my phone, which says about two minutes. We have holy shit. Holy moly. All right. Do you know what it's two minutes tell? We're going to have to curtail this question session because why James? Because lunch is arriving and lunch is on Grogu. We are getting sent a Burger King Mandalorian and Grogu lunch. They have some kind of tie-in Mandalorian and Grogu menu and they are sending it to the office. Who's that? Burger King. Yes, Burger King. Okay. Remember this when you review in the film later on. Yeah. This integrity tastes great. So good. I'm having a extra pickle. Yeah. We are not sell outs. We're just very hungry. There's a big difference. Not sell outs, just eaten. That's right. All right. So that's Colin the day with the question section. We'll take a little break. We'll be back. We filled with Grogu. Great fun for everybody. No. Bye. All right. We are back folks. We are back for the second part of the show. The news part of the show. Forgive us if we fall asleep halfway through because we have all eaten very well. Our bellies are full. Helen and Jimbo with one I can only assume was minced. Yes. I believe that's exactly what it was. We had green. What is it? I'm going to check the thing here. We had a galactic mandalorian double whopper meal. We did. We did. And it has each mashed Grogu in it. No, no, that's not right. It's a Grogu. It's a felon to your mincer. No. It is a, and I quote from the website, a delicious green pickle ketchup, which in no way tastes like blended Grogu. No, absolutely. Because we've been wondering for a long time because obviously Star Wars hellentakes place in a long time ago in a galaxy far, far away. And we've been wondering about the fate of Grogu in Star Wars. He's not in the sequel trilogy. I'm sorry, the sequel duology is he. And now we know what's happened to him. He has been turned into burgers and pickle ketchup. Yeah. It's a great big galaxy and he is really puny. He's teeny tiny specks about the size of Mickey Rooney. The point is he was away doing something else during the time of the sequels. Everything's fine. Grogu is fine. I thought he was very tasty. So I'm very, very tasty indeed. But thank you so much to Burger King. It's a tasty burger. It is a tasty burger and I washed it down with a coke. Yeah, you did. I can never remember quotes. What's the quote? A tasty beverage. A tasty beverage. I mean, if I have some of your tasty beverage to wash this down. You wanted to have a libation. Yeah, I did have a libation. Maybe. The voice, see the baby. So thank you so much to Burger King for being very, very kind and sending us the, what's it? The galactic Mandalorian double-wopper meal. That feels like a mouthful. I mean, it was. It was a mouthful. I've never had a whopper and I enjoyed it. Next, the Big Mac. Okay. Warm Mac. Anyway, warm Mac. Warm Mac. All right. Shall we move on? Let's talk about some moving news. Such as it is. I mean, there has been quite a bit, Jimbo. I don't know if you've been paying attention. Yeah. Jimbo paying attention. I don't know what you're talking about. News, movies. What are these things? So tell us, Chris. Yeah, tell us, Chris. I was sort of, you would tell me, right? I've got a long, long news. So much news. Many, many. Have you not seen the incredible, and I mean incredible. Hold on to your hat. Yeah. Hold the front page. James Bond casting update. Wow. Tell us. Which was basically that there is no James Bond casting update. Okay. Well, that's, that's good to know. So last week, last week, Amazon MGM Studios, as we are now, officially bound to call them, they released a statement. They released an actual statement about the search for the next James Bond. This is it. Okay. Okay. The search for the next James Bond is underway. Right. While we don't plan to comment on specific details during the casting process, we're excited to share more news with seven fans. What? Oh, sorry. Double those seven fans as soon as the time is right. Well, that makes more sense. I mean, holy shit. Good Lord. That was definitely worth issuing a press release for. Wasn't it? Yeah. Well, with all the, you know, quote unquote, insiders reporting on who's in the running and who isn't. Who's in the running? I guess they had to. Well, so each of us get to pick one person. Grogu. I would watch that. But no, I don't believe so. The name's goo. Grogu. I know Helen. The stag's view here are surprisingly low. So low. If you had to pretend that you're very good, if you had to pretend that you cared a slight little bit, who would you pick to fill the DJ? I'm not excited about any of the names in contention. I'm just going to say that. No, no, no. Give us a name. Well, the names in contention. No. Okay. Okay. So there is our interlurgeonson. Yeah. Calum Turner. Yeah. Formerly of this podcast. Two weeks ago. Both on this podcast. Very recently. Very recently. So you have your favorites already, like lined up in that case. And can't, I'm not going to say anything. And I'm taking the fifth on this one. Yeah. Who else? Jacob Lourdy. Everybody's been talking about him for months. Good Lordy. But I think he might be too big now. I feel like if this happened last year, I mean physically, but also like just fame status wise. I feel like if it had been last year, I think he would have been a shun. I don't know now if they'll think he's got too big. And the interesting one to me is Tom Francis, who is Tom Francis. I would say by some distance, the least famous of the names in contention. It's lose of the four names. Those are the names. Those are the names that Tom Francis. Tom Francis was on stage in that, what do you call it, the play sunset boulevard. Okay. On the call of sharing her last year. So he's kind of not famous for very much more than that right now. I'm not going to pitch this up in right now. He looks like he's on the X factor. That's not a bad thing. Is the X factor still going? I'm not sure. I don't know. Or the voice or something like that. He was in J. Kelly. He had a small role in J. Kelly. He's actually done much more theater than anything else. Right. That's not necessarily a big problem for, you know, 007 producers. Historically, they haven't always wanted the biggest names. He has worn a tuxedo. You can see pictures of him in the tuxedo if you Google him, which obviously is a major major. I mean, you can see pictures of me and Chris in tuxedo. If you Google us. I know, but I'm not saying we're in the running for bond. Look, well, I mean, I don't know. You both have British passports. Do you have worn a tuxedo? So come we rule you out. I don't know that we can. She's not wrong. But yeah, I'm up for it. Okay. Well, if they want their bond to look like a man who's just consumed a galactic mandalorian double-wopper meal, then come call in. That's all bond eats. Yeah. It's actually true. I would the first bond, Sean Connery wore a two-peg. So we could be very much in that. You think I could do that? I think I bought a bond to pay. Yeah. You could do that. Go film Mark Strong. Yeah. Rocks of all star dust with a long flowing locks. Oh, I'm excited about this now. Yeah. Cast me a bond. Give me a wig. Let's do it. Yeah. Do you spend with the talk? Because I'm going to talk for a very long time. That would be amazing. I'm not ruling myself out. Yeah. Wow. Well, I'm sure there'll be thrilled to hear that. I would think that every young actor in Britain and further abroad. And further abroad. Ireland. Ireland as well. Ireland as well. Australia. There's four. You know about Australian bonds. Yeah. I mean, famously they've never gone down well. Yeah. You always worry cunning linguist James. That's right. That's a different one. Yes. The worst bond is George Laisenby. I don't know that he was terrible himself. He was. Because it's not a bad film and it's got, if story wise, it's actually really good. Yeah. I'm not a fan of one of my CC service now. I don't like it. Yeah. I think the film has been reassessed. And reassessing the Australians have to be, you know, tired with the Laisenby brush. If it indeed it be tar. Can I mate? My name's Bond. Rose Bond. No, it doesn't, it doesn't work. He doesn't have to do the accent. Like to be fair, if we are talking about Jacob Lourdy, like he has form in doing very good a lie. Okay. I'm going to say it's going to be unpopular. He's too tall. He's too tall. He's too tall. He's too tall. Too tall. Yeah. So like column turners only like two inches. Yeah. He's only two inches shorter. And you know, I'm fully prepared to change my mind completely when they're he's confirmed as the official Bond and two big time and I go, this is great casting. I'm fully behind it. I like Aaron Taylor Johnson. The one thing and I've said this before, the one thing about Aaron Taylor Johnson is his voice is a little bit of me, but you know, Jamie's done, you know, it's a little bit like that. It is. You might as well hire a jukebox. Can you do? Can you take it down? What can you do? You know, the sort of what do you call him Bradley Bradley? Bradley walks through the chase. I was going to say Bradley Kuhn. in the Lady Gaga film and take his voice down an octave. Yes, or like Bill Skarskart when he did the. Pennywise Farratu. Louis Bond, Louis Bond, Louis Bond, and he took his voice down an octave. I would be back in if that happened. I would be so unborn. If James Bond just were with him, I'd be right with that accent. Is it all locked or all off? All locked? Okay, just checking. I like his Pennywise voice, I don't know what I'm going to tell you. He would be interested. I'm sure they've gone to him as well. Sorry, you're talking about Bill Skarskart. I'm a Pennywise. Pennywise specifically. I don't know if we're ready for a red-headed Bond. Chris. We had a blonde bond in Daniel Craig. We managed it. The world's still spun. That's true. And we're having a red-headed Mr. Darcy in the next part of the industry. What up? This is a fucking outrage. You know. It is a truth. University of Knowledge, James. But I am furious about this. That was very good from Jane Austen's knowledge. It's the only thing I know about Jane Austen. I think it should be Vernon Wells. Why do you think so? Oh, no, that's right. He'd be better off playing one of the band-aid sisters. Um. We. Oh, Vernon Wells. (laughs) What is this happening? For a lawyer. (laughs) It's like that's bad cast in Jimbo. He's dead. Yes. But no, you pulled it back from the band. Oh, did. Yes. Yes. Yeah. Yeah. All the ones who are in the frame at the moment, I'm my pick. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. I'm the one who's in the frame at the moment. I'm my pick would be Aaron Taylor Johnson. I would look at someone like Aaron Pierre as well. He's good, although, and I make a case for this in the next issue of Amphanem magazine, Papa S.E.A. do is my pick for bond because he's funny. He's very, he's suave. He's charming, but he's also very funny. He has a very dry, very British sense of humour. And I think it is time to inject a little bit more fun into bond. So. Having for fun bond, I think Aaron Taylor Johnson can be funnier than maybe like a Jacob of Lorde would probably be a less funny bond than Aaron Taylor Johnson. Yeah. He's actually the Johnson funny. He's done funny. He can be with the right script, I think. I think. I don't. Helen Turner, I don't think has. He hasn't shown funny. Lovely guy. Lovely. Great actor. He has yet to locate my funny bone. Yes. He's very powerful. Wow. But yeah, I don't know. It's interesting. I look, you know, look at R&P R.A.R.E.R.E.R. walk around with me. He's massive. He's a unit. He looks great. He's very nice. He's very nice. While we're talking R&P R.A.R.E.R.E.R., did anyone see the Lanterns trailer? I do. Yeah. Yeah. For Lanterns, which is the HBO Max series that Damon Lindelof, I think, has co-created and stars Kyle Chandler. Go on, James. - Yes. - Yes, full hearted conglomerates. - Every single time. - I'm actually, sorry. It's like Pav Lobos Bell with this guy. And Aaron Pierre has Hal Jordan and John Stewart, not that one, two lanterns, two green lanterns, who have to team up to investigate some sort of crime. And this I have to say, this is absolutely right up my straight. This looks absolutely fucking terrific. It's on HBO Max in August, I believe. And you can bet your bottom dollar we'll be doing weekly sporters specials. But yes, please, I would say Helen or her. - Also, yes, please. And not just 'cause they're two of the most handsome men I've ever seen, just generally, it looks fun. It looks like a nice kind of blend of tone, something we haven't seen a million times before. And I think it's an interesting, green lantern has so famously been fumbled on the big screen. - Wait, name one time green lanterns has been fumbled on the big screen. - Actually, no, I'm saying that Ryan Reynolds fumbled somebody at the sun. - It never brings it up. Green lantern is his attack of the clone to view. - It really is. - It's like he constantly brings it up. - It's very similar to the attack of the clone to view, isn't it? It's on a par, like cosmically, with getting attacked the clone's wrong, isn't it? But yeah, I just think it looks really entertaining. I'm excited to see how that translates to the small screen. - Yeah, I'm much more psyched about it than my predisposition towards the DC if I would necessarily imply. But yeah, it looks really good. Anything with Carl Chandra in "I Will Watch." Anything with Aaron Pierre in "I Will Watch." So this, you know, I'm double watching this. - Anything with green lanterns in it, I will watch it. - I also noticed that Tom King is one of the writers on this. And he wrote the comic that the new Supergirl movie is based on. This is a very good comic. - Very good writer. - So that's also a good, good story. - I don't understand why Marvel and DC/Wonder Brothers haven't done this more often and employed great comic writers to write screenplays. I know they're different disciplines, of course, but it's a fairly transferable skill set. And these people, the likes of your Tom King's and your Gail Simone's, know these characters inside and out are brilliant writers. And I think would really, really nail the tone of stuff on the big screen. But anyway, hey, who? Off my soapbox looks terrific. It's out in August, as I said, on HBO Max. Anything else you want to talk about? - There has been news of the Daniels. - New film. - What? - What news of the Daniels? - What news? So we know that they're making a sci-fi film and we know that it's a secret. - So we don't know anything more about it pretty much than that. - Not much of a secret. - That was the news. - We did know. - The release and update going. This is the latest update on the Daniels film. There is no update. - Well, there was a story there, our story. There were reports, credible reports that it was going to be Ryan Goldstein starring in this. Now he has obviously decided, look, I've nailed sci-fi for this year. - Space completed it mate. - Completed it. I need never return. I have conquered that final frontier. So he has apparently withdrawn for whatever reason we don't know. And the story goes that Matt Damon is stepping into the breach. So I now assume that this is going to be the story of a man who has stranded somewhere and has to be rescued. Because when Matt Damon is in the sci-fi movie, that's usually what happens. - That is accurate. - Or a war movie. Or most movies. - Saving Matt Damon. - Saving Matt Damon for things. Somebody has told it up how much humanity has spent rescuing Matt Damon from his various adventures over the years. And it is a lot of money. So I'm just saying. Stay at home, Matt Damon. - Someone said in the question for consideration this week, we didn't do it, we didn't get around for it. Maybe another time. But they've noticed that anti-circus is constantly breaking out of prison and things. And they did a list of stuff. Like he's breaking out of prison or prison type things in two Apes movies, the escapist. Probably Lord the Rings, probably like Panther and Dora. He's always breaking out of prison. - He did, I mean, the hunt for golem is because like he literally escapes. So yeah. - There you go. So maybe actors are drawn to various things. - There's certain things. - Maybe he's prepping for something. Maybe he there's something in a prison that he needs to get to. And he's planning to go to prison to get that thing and then escape with it. So I'm just bit bowling here. - Okay. - But anyway, yeah, that's exciting. Matt Damon in the next Daniels movie. Very, very exciting news indeed. There's some remake news. - Ooh. - You guys hear this stuff? - What is that? - So my beloved possessive good boy, Sam Raimi, the greatest director of all time, is following up hot on the heels of the success of "Send Help" by re-teaming with the writers of "Send Help", Damian Shannon and Mark Swift to direct a remake of "Ticky Attenborough's chilling 1979." - I wanna say. - 78. - 78. - Psychological horror magic about a man who has a ventriloquist dummy that may or may not be alive. That man was Tony Hopkins. Tony Hopkins. - He's back in the day and now it's gonna be someone else. - Whoa. - And it's a good movie. If you haven't seen it, it's a good film. Check it out. And the dummy's pretty scary. - What's his name? - What's his name? - Yeah, he says, "Got look here, got look here." (laughing) - I'm here for it. I feel like Sam Raimi getting back to horror again. - Again. - It's a good thing. And yeah, I'd rather see him do this than, you know, Dr. Strange as a turn tie. Just say. - Also exciting. - Yeah, Philip Barantini. - Ooh. - The director of adolescence and boiling point. And of course, Inola Holmes III coming up on Netflix very, very soon. One of those things is not like the other. (laughing) - Maybe it's a one shot, you didn't know. - You never know. - You never know. - Oh, that'd be amazing. In one shot Inola Holmes. Oh, amazing. He is going to direct the announcement this week on Instagram, a remake of the classic Sam Peckampal Steve McQueen, Ali McGraw. - It's really the getaway, which was remade, of course, once already. - Yeah. - Some prefer it, some fools prefer that version. I wouldn't want to name names, but they may be me. I don't break the name by Roger Donaldson with Ali Paul winning Kim Basinger in the mid 1990s. - Do you have to find, how do I put this delicately? Leads who want to fuck each other in order for it to work? - I hate to hear you put it indelicately. But I mean, there was an affair on the original, right? And Ali Paul winning Kim Basinger were married, right? - Well, that's what we've looking at. - Yes. - Yeah. - And they have quite steamy sex scenes. My glasses have just steamed up. Just even thinking about those sex scenes, which I don't regularly. - Of course. - But they are quite in that movie. And yes, Steve McQueen and Ali McGraw. Yes, I believe there was. Anyway, it's a good point. That's a very good point. Do you hesitate to sign up to this film if you're single is what I'm asking? Or if you're in a relationship with someone who's not also starring? Do you cast people who are already married or in a relationship? This is it, or is that going to threaten their marriages? Why would a threat threaten their marriage? Oh, if they're married to each other. It's a marriage to each other, yes. Yeah, absolutely. They could do that. Is a basinger or a basinger? I would always say basinger. I think it's basinger. Yeah, I used to call her Kim Basinger back in the day where that was the first time. I call her Kim Basinger. Yeah, I think we were wrong. I think it's basing. Anyway, we're not going to obviously suggest any real life couples in my story. But that's exciting. Both of those movies are terrific movies. Yes, the remakes terrific. Shut up. One last thing. Did you reason use that the David Fincher brand pit Cliff Booth movie, which is obviously the follow-up to Once Upon Time in Hollywood, following Brad Pitt's Cliff Booth with a screenplay by Quentin Tarantino, which is coming to Netflix later in the year. I think in December, I'm not sure, but it's going to be on iMac screens a couple of weeks before it hits Netflix. This feels a little bit like there's a softening of Netflix's stance towards cinema because recently they announced that Credit Courage's Narnia movie is going to get a great big theatrical platform before it hits Netflix, like a proper one as well, which is unusual, maybe in order to get to work with prestige filmmakers, they're going to have to make some concessions towards this. And I'm sure Ryan Johnson's sitting there going. And where was this for Wake Up.man? Anyway. Yeah, I think that's exactly it. They were at risk of losing filmmakers as a result of the streaming first approach and they're trying desperately to keep the big names on side. But I'm just glad that we're going to see it on a big screen. I think I hope people go see it on the big screen and don't just wait for it to stream. I know not everyone has access to their nearest iMacs or whatever. It may not be very near at all. But hopefully people will turn out for this and see it as I suspect Fincher always intended. He obviously goes way back with Netflix. I mean, Heise of Cards was one of their very first big hits. So he knows what he's doing. And he has, of course, many movies for Netflix that haven't had a theatrical release or a proper theatrical release either. But maybe with this one. It may well be the QT angle. I know he's only writing and not directing here, but it does feel like, you know, he is someone who is very much cinema first and streaming. And I think if they're trying to cultivate a better relationship with him or cultivate any kind of ongoing relationship with him, this is a very smart move for that. All right. Looking forward to that. They still haven't given it an official title, by the way. Oh, interesting. Yeah. So I don't know what it's going to be. You know, it's kind of been unofficially called the adventures of Cliff Booth, but I don't know whether that's going to be the case. So we're going to see this in November, November 25th of November, specifically in a 23rd of December on Netflix. So what if Christmas gift that is? Oh, you see, Saran does claws. Thank you so much for coming down my chimney with the Cliff Booth movie. Just two days before Christmas, lovely stuff. All right. Shall we give a guest? Let's do it. Enough of that movie news nonsense. Let's have a guest. Shall we have a legend? Hurrah. Shall we have a Sigourney Weaver? Let's do it. This is the star of Alien and Aliens and the star of Galaxy Quest. And you know, she has her dabs all over some great sci-fi movies of the last 40 to 50 years or so. But she's never been in a star war. Until now. For in this week's the Mandalorian and Grogu, she gets her teeth into a galactic Mandalorian double-wopper meal complete with chips and some Grogu pickle sauce. No, she doesn't. She plays Colonel Ward, who is a rebel leader. I think it's fair to say I don't want to get too much into sport or territory with this, who entrusts Mando and Grogu with a pivotal mission in John Favreaux movie. And when she came into London recently, I went along and had a lovely chat with her. And I wanted to talk to her about sci-fi and her sci-fi legacy and the fact that she was in Alien. And the impact the Star Wars has kind of had on her career because you could argue no Star Wars, no Alien, no podcast interview with Sigourney Weaver. I'm sure she would have made it big eventually down a different path. But I think that dictates the path that she has taken in her career. As we talked about that, and a great many things. Enjoy. This is for the Empire Podcast, Sigourney. You just spoke to Empire along with Jim Cameron and Michael and. And I just had time yesterday to quickly scan the article and I'm so glad you guys did that because it's for me a treasure to hear, to sort of. Even though there were only a few of us, it was great to hear from everybody and talk about, you know, it is amazing to me that the movie. It's still so much in the zeitgeist as it was, as it was, as it were. And I think it's because it was so beautifully constructed, you know, just non-stop. And anyway, it's great to have Empire remind us that it's 40 years, right? 40 years. And that's just so incredible to me. It is incredible. I was thinking on the way in here that the alien franchise, the Star Wars franchise, you know, are somehow, you know, there were still. There's still, there's still hugely culturally relevant nearly 50 years on. You know, do you have a theory about why these franchises, more than others, have endured? I think it's because science fiction is endlessly fascinating to us because it's the future. And a lot of questions that we have now more than ever, what will it, what will we be like in space? How will we behave as human beings? What is our responsibility to other species? What is our goal? Who are we? Are we the same people here as out there? I mean, I just think there, I think that's why science fiction, which is, I think, considers sort of a. Not a lowly genre, but, you know, it's definitely considered a genre. And to me, they're not. There are stories that take place in a future that we can almost see, and that deal with how we live then, and how to live then. And what I love about the Star Wars franchise, unlike the alien one, is that you see all these peoples and species getting along. Yeah. And, you know, living in villages and hang bars and everything, and it's like, it's such a positive view of the human race and other races. I think it's really cool. Ripley and the Cedar Morph might get along in the Star Wars universe. Interesting to see them throwing back shots together in a Star Wars bar. I am fascinated by your relationship with Star Wars over the years and how maybe consciously or unconsciously it's impacted you and your career because, of course, you were in Annie Hall. Yes. And very briefly, of course, but you were in Annie Hall. And that movie, Beat Star Wars, that year, to the best picture Oscar. And I wondered if you had any territorial feelings at that time, as that was happening, as that was unfolding. And Annie Hall beat Star Wars to the Oscar, where you think, yes, I take that Star Wars. I think the Oscars seem so remote to me, as someone working off Broadway. You want to keep in track of it over the year at that time. I think I was glad because it took place in New York. And I guess I am in it for a second. And I think it is beloved. But I think I was amazed that Star Wars was nominated because it is a commercial movie. And in those days, if the movie made money, it made less, you know, it was less considered by the Academy, I think. So good for them. They were nominated, I think. They did very well. Were you keeping an eye on the Star Wars phenomenon? As it happened, as you say, as someone who was working in off Broadway at the time. I remember going to the Ziegfeld Theatre and seeing it, along with everybody else. And I just thought how cool that these young actors got to be playing in this world, where it was so ingenious and funny and lighthearted in a way. And I think it sort of dimly reminded me that I was in the same business that somehow off off Broadway life might actually include. Watching something that I'm in at the Ziegfeld, which never happened. Oh, you never got to see yourself at the Ziegfeld. Not at the Ziegfeld, and now it's closed. Of course, yeah. But I certainly saw cool things at the Ziegfeld in Star Wars. I just remember it going over us. I think there are so many things that are innovative in that movie and charming and hold up wonderfully. And so I found it encouraging that three young actors had these fabulous jobs. So you never saw Alien at the Ziegfeld? So where did you watch the Alien for the first time? I'm trying to remember if we even had a premiere. Okay. And we did for Aliens, because that was in LA. Yeah, no party. So I brought everyone back to my hotel room and charged the champagne to To Fox right you so I don't remember having a premiere for alien. I mean You guys probably know more about that There's probably someone listening to this right now going there was a premier of the Gourney Yeah, it was at this place and this time But you know we didn't know that Ripley would emerge is such an important figure No, I mean honestly, I'm sorry. I don't remember. That's fine. Yeah, that's totally fine But it is fascinating. There's a direct line between Star Wars and Alien Yeah, you could argue that alien got green lit because of the success of Star Wars that 20th century Fox were thinking space is big That's that's go that's go for us Uh, and it happened all very very quickly you were Filming in 78 on alien did you feel that that was Almost part of the Star Wars bounce in a way not at all Star Wars was a huge movie in scale and Uh, it's spirit and everything else Uh, a movie made for the world. I felt we were a little awful Broadway movie made for 14 million dollars In a kind of closet a shepherd and I mean yes, it was beautiful. We had wonderful Michael C. More sets and everything but I felt In a good way that we were um we were greenlit by Alan Lad Jr I think they were very interested in Ridley and in this project and probably for the reasons you say science fiction was hot But this was such a different I'm glad they let us do our thing fast forwards then to the Mandalorian and Grogo and working with John Favrell How did it come up? What was the first conversation you had with him about this? Well, I've always been a mar of John because he was he's a wonderful actor He's been in so many different things but also he's directed such big beloved franchises and um So I was a little nervous. It's all on zoom now when you meet people. Okay, and so I met John by zoom I didn't know anything about the Mandalorian I'm so he had to encourage me to watch the series um and this little guy So I I think I had to really play catch up and I I was delighted to be invited to come into that world um, but I couldn't really place the Mandalorian in it even sort of when it happens and it took me a while to to realize that I was the same generation as Leia and that whole group um and that the the the rebellion is still very fresh and the Republic is still very much afligeling that needs to be protected um So I think that I'm I feel very lucky that I could completely relate time wise to this movie Yeah, luck is off into it very much so and uh do you see comparison points between the great directors that you've worked with over the years, you know, Ridley, Jim Cameron, Polansky, yeah, Favreau, Ivan Wright, and people like that do you do you do you have things in common? I think they do um and I feel very lucky. I noticed that directors uh although John is different because he was an actor for many years um they don't get to work with other directors and so what I think was always important to me was that um first it was the story the second thing was that the director had a strong enough vision and was a fighter so that they could fight to protect this movie from the forces of filmmaking that inevitably try to destroy it and um you have to be tough man and you've got to think of everyone and everything and um I think that certainly characterizes these guys everyone of the different style um and I've been so fortunate to work with so many different great directors people listening to this will be going Chris you're not asking about the the plot of the film and the frankly speaking I don't want to ask too much about the plot of the movie because I want people to discover this for themselves and discover more about your character but I think we can say that you have scenes with the Mandalorian in this I think that's safe to say and I think it's safe to say that the Mandalorian brought the apprentice with him and that this was a big draw for me the actor because it didn't take long for me to fall in love with Grogu because he's irresistible and um I was very lucky because the first scene I worked on was with the Mandalorian and Grogu I didn't realize that there were five puppeteers hidden under the table that were keeping him alive for me as I sat there I just never saw him as anything other than a living uh Grogu I think that that's the impression it made on me and and I still believe that he could walk in now. How'd you had experiences like that before in your career were you've worked with puppets or I you know I have worked with humans inside the aliens yeah etc and I much prefer as an actor to have something real to react to if I'm going to be scared or something please don't expect me to be scared of a potted palm that you put in a corner or something or tennis ball on a stick yes exactly and so um I appreciate whatever directors come up with but I have never worked with a puppet and I don't even like to use that word with the Grogu because that's that's really not doing I'm just this but it is interesting and that you do get to work with you know you have scenes with Mando himself and that whether it's Pedro whether it's whether it's any of the other guys are in the in the in the suit I might as such an interesting experience as an actor because you don't have a face to work off you just have this this helmet that's reflecting you back at yourself yeah was that strange it I don't think it's strange for me coming from the theater because all Mando has to do is walk into a room and you're so aware that there's a presence inside that suit and um I worked with Brendan Wayne because Pedro was working on something else and he's John Wayne's grandson yes and he moves so beautifully and and frankly he's an actor so says the lines very much as Pedro would and so I felt I felt completely supported by having the actual actors there an actor as Grogu and an actor as Mando but it is it's one of the challenges I think and Colonel Ward my character faces is I have to make a very I have made a very important decision to to count on this on the Mandalorian to go up and pull these guys in from out of the corners of the outer rim these guys who were who are terrorizing people and trying to undermine the new republic but she has to put her faith in someone whose eyes she can't look into and someone who seems only interested in snacks so although I have I have decided that they're the best people for this job yeah when I meet them it's um it's still one of those things where I'm judging them by reputation you know all the notes according it's been a pleasure like it's pretty time and thanks again for doing that article it's such a nice thing for us to have done and have to look at absolutely pleasure thank you so much indeed okay that was Sigorni Weaver who is of course Colonel Ward in the Mandalorian and Grogu and now it is time for the reviews section of the show and there's only one place to start it is with the Mandalorian and Grogu the first Star Wars movie in I'm told seven years Helen O'Hara and this seven years and this is a spin off I continuation of course of the Mandalorian the wildly successful Disney+ show the start Petro Pascal and Chums as Din Jarin and his little pal his little green pal Grogu what's what we're up to now what's happening in this and Grogu for lunch we did eat Grogu RIP Grogu or PIR if he speaks and you're to speak oh no okay so yes we we meet them again they have made contact with the new republic they were on friendly terms so the aforementioned Colonel Ward sends them out on a mission to find he's basically hunting down Imperial warlords who are still out there causing chaos like some infeasant all sure so and in this case they basically and in this case he basically has to do a mission for two huts the twins in order to get the information about the next Imperial Warlord that they're trying to find because they don't know where this guy is they don't even know what he looks like it's a sort of blank space so he's sent on this mission and let's just say it doesn't go to plan you've got Jeremy Alan White there as Rotter the Hut who is basically Jabba the Hedge like he's got six panquished makes no fucking sense he is a worm with a sea six packets really disturbing. Anyway, but they they meet him at one point. They meet a friendly alien who may or may not have information for them who's voiced by Martin Scorsese. So I guess this is cinema Martin. This is cinema. Absolutely. Okay. Anyway. And they have to hunt down their guy. There is kind of wall to wall action here. I think they've really, really go not of the way to try and make this not feel like a TV show like from the opening sort of action scene, there's a lot of chases and battles and fights and creeping around and like they're really trying to throw money at the screen and make you feel like it's cinematic. I think what where this misses for me in terms of cinematicness, which is a word I've just invented, is that I don't think the sort of the storytelling is cinematic in this. I think the storytelling still feels quite small screen and I kind of want to I felt like what was missing afterwards were the scenes where people sit down and talk about the stakes and make a plan that can then go horribly wrong, but then you're excited and invested in the plan and how they're going to get out of this latest scrape and blah, blah, blah. And they don't really do that. They're just always reacting to instant events and there's no real sense of what's the what's the end goal here. I mean, I know that they're trying to find the dude, but that's not it's not enough to really carry you through. I kind of wanted people to sort of say, okay, we need to do X in order for Y to happen to do Z and then it's back to ABC and there wasn't a lot of that. And I think you have a problem structurally with the fact that obviously Grogu doesn't speak and Mando doesn't like to speak. And so you have these two incredibly taciturn figures at the heart of it. And they can only do so much with body language because this is, you know, Grogu is a puppet and he's a beautiful puppet and he's exceptionally well performed and there's he has so many cute moments in this, but there is a limit to how much emotion you can communicate with that puppet. And when it's him and a dude in a helmet, that does kind of, I think, place a limit on how far you can go sort of emotionally and kind of in terms of interior character and everything else. And that's a problem when you also don't have the sort of soaringly high stakes of like the big Star Wars kind of Skywalker saga kind of films. So that for me is the limitation on this. I did have a good time while I was watching it. I was entertained. Things were happening. Grogu was cute. The Mandalorian was, he just gave off a handsome vibe even when you couldn't see his face, you know, he's drawn a mustache on his helmet, which I thought was interesting. Yeah, I mean, that was a great, great choice. And his sludgy little glasses that he's drawn on the helmet also really worked. Slutty little glasses. But, you know, I just felt like it didn't have, when I came out, I felt like it's still hungry, you know, when you go, like you haven't had a galactic Mandalorian that's it. That's what you needed. Mandalorian double war. I just felt like I was missing something that would have made this a Star Wars movie as opposed to a Star Wars TV, you know, extended TV show like Big Finale to a season. If this had been a big finale to a season, I think we would have been pretty happy. But seeing it on the big screen, I felt something lacking and I didn't, you know, I can, I'm sure we will in this world, a special Pixar More Holes in it, but I didn't, I didn't have a bad time. I just wanted more. I will also say, because I was thinking a lot about my small niece and nephew while I was watching this, I think they've slightly miscalibrated the monsters. There's a lot of fighting various monsters, Nalian beasties in this movie. And I think they're too scary looking for this to be a good kid's film and it should have been a good kid's film. This should have been something that you could bring an eight year old or a nine year old to and I'm not sure you're going to feel very confident about their ability not to have nightmares afterwards. Like there's a man-sized centipede thing at one point and that would be, I think, pretty scary. I would worry less about children having nightmares and more grown adult Star Wars fans having nightmares after having seen this. It's the first Star Wars movie in seven years. There's quite a lot I would say riding on this and, you know, I've got a lot of time for John Favreau, but I feel like if you're going to make a movie of the Manjaro and Grago, you could do better than cobble together what I can only assume is three mid-season episodes from the fourth season of the show that they wrote and never made. If these three episodes had been the finale episodes to a season, I would have felt thoroughly sure changed by what this is because there is no story here. There is no jeopardy. There is no progress. There is no character growth. The universe shifts not one parcel from the beginning to the end of it. It is entirely redundant and I think that really bothered me because it starts very well that you have this oncy about 20 minute prologue where Mando and Grago go in to take down a bounty and it's everything you want. He's super cool. The choreography is funny. It's slick. You feel really excited and invigorating. Yes, come on. Also, we saw an iMacs. Section said this is a shot in iMacs. That sequence, you're like, brilliant. This is great. However, it just feels like TV. I love TV. That in and of it so much. Do you ever have ever mentioned it? Fine. Yeah, positive podcast. But genuinely, this felt so small and reductive and also boring because there is no narrative drive to this whatsoever. I just found myself increasingly annoyed. Is it went wrong? I don't know why this film is. If they've done this then it gets season four. Fine. Great. If you gave me a two hour Mandalorian one shot, like Punisher one last cut, right? A one off Mandalorian Special in Disney+ I would watch this. I would say it outstays. It's welcome a little bit but I would happily watch it. Someone said to me, should I pay money to go and see this at cinema? The answer would be no. Why would you do that? And this kind of feeds into something that may be a personal bug bear of mine, which is the and we are going in this direction, the kind of felonification of Star Wars. Now, his animated shows do what they do well. If that's what you're after, but what this is is just at this point and animated show with live action characters in it. And it doesn't have the cinematic quality. It doesn't have the epic feel. It doesn't have the storytelling of the Star Wars films. Even the flawed ones. And you know how I feel about the Rise of Skywalker. I believe this is, I believe that this is. And I honestly, I hate to say comfortably the worst Star Wars film ever. Oh no. Come on. Genuinely. It is the least essential. It is the least cinematic. It is the least exciting. For all problems with the tag of the clients, for all the problems with Rise of Skywalker, you know, they have great moments in there. Have exciting moments in them for all their flaws. Caravan of courage. All right. All right. Let the record show. I will accept Caravan of courage and battle friend or I'll worse than the man. We're in a great fine. Fine. I will, I will concede that to the quality. But there are so many things about this that don't work. Like Jeremy Alamoid is great. I totally get it. I read interviews with him talking about how he found the hot voice. And then I watched his film and it's just Bruce Springsteen and he's a slug. Well, he doesn't even attempt to do a hub. He's just speaking in his Jeremy Alamoid voice. It's coming from the bear. Chimbalers, there's an argument to be made that's in this movie. Jeremy Alamoid looks and sounds more like Bruce Springsteen than he did in the movie. I mean, look, I'm not going to pass comment on that. But I found that to be singularly terrible. And I get why they had it because it feels like Follonies come full circle. You look at the original Clone Wars. It's first Star Wars movie. It's about Rotter the Hutt being kidnapped. And obviously this is about Rotter the Hutt being kidnapped. So I get, you know, it's great. It's a lovely parallel. But there's nothing else to this film. And you get to the end of it. And it's the thinnest of thin rule. It is not a Mandalorian wopper meal of any description. It is just, it's just, it's just, it's just swamp juice. It's just a swamp. It's not even that. I really, I felt so, so change by this. I was so angry coming out of it because it's such a misopportunity because Star Wars has gone through such a difficult period. Post-Risers Sky walk out. And I feel like if you're going to come back with a film for the love of God put some effort in and I just feel like this was on autopilot. There's no real effort to make this cinematic, to make it big, to make the storytelling epic, to make it essential in any way, shape or form. So I feel quite cross. But apart from them, this is like, but other than that, they're great. If they had taken big swings and it'd been a noble failure and it had been a bit ship, they tried, I'd have been like, okay, fair enough, I see what you tried to do there. But this felt like the most middle of the road play at safe vanilla storytelling. And I just, and there's a whole sequence here where it's just Grogu being Grogu. And I think they overestimate how much that can carry a film. I disagree. I did not. Yeah. Well, that's okay. And other people, I sure bet I want to fucking love it. But perhaps I don't want to give anything away, of course. But for a long time in this movie, you'll be wandering a couple of things. You'll be wandering, is that Pedro Pascal in this suit? And I will say before I get into the larger point that the film does go out of his way to credit the other guys who play Mando in this, the Teeth Crowder and Brandon Wayne, John Wayne's grandson. They are not as prominently billed as Pedro Pascal, but they are, I think, third and fourth build in this movie, which is incredible. I'd doff my helmet to them. You will also be wondering why the film is called the Mandalorian and Grogu because it's very Mando-centric and very Mando-heavy until it isn't. And then I thought there's a moment where Grogu takes over, as the lead character of the movie, for a sustained period. And I thought that was utterly charming. I like that a lot, but that's the bit that really made me like not furious. But really, really frustrated that I didn't feel like I could show small Nissan FU the rest of the movie. Do you know what I mean? I think you're a small Nissan FU need to grow the fuck up. I mean, I'll get the given time, but like I just feel like some of the monster design and it was really lingered over like it wasn't like the rank where you just see like a tiny bit in return the Jedi doesn't haunt your dreams, although the star like pit I guess might, but this just felt like we were seeing all of these like up close like scary monster faces. Don't kids love that sort of shit? I don't know that I don't think they do necessarily if they're this horrible. I just thought they got the level of horribleness wrong. I think the star wars think back to the the the the the diologo. What's the thing in the water? Yeah, yeah. But again, you don't see much. You see it. You see it. And you see it. Yeah. And you see there's, you know, the obviously the cantina is filled with with great exotic terrifying creatures. They're not trying to eat. They're just they're living their lives. I know you mean that's quite a bit of sort of monster peril in this. I think that the monster design veers from quite scary to really cartoonian silly. It's quite tonally inconsistent. And I think the aesthetic of the cartoon bleeds into this in a number of places. But yeah, would it be scary? I mean, I don't think it's as jarring from a kind of tonal point of view as say something like black widow was where I was just like the violence and that for me was on massive step up. And I was like, okay, kids are not going to be able to watch this. I think kids could watch this. They just might have to hide for the rise. Yeah. It's fine. I hid from all sorts of stuff. And I was like, you used to hide from the audience, carry the omen. Yeah. Terminator. The getaway. All kinds of stuff. Yeah. But yeah, Chimper, it's not the worst star in the movie. I think we don't, if we don't class caravan of courage and battle friend or as movies. If we talk things. It's a better movie than the rise of the sky. I don't think it is. I genuinely hand on heart. Do not think it is a better movie than the rise of skywalker. And I do not like the rise of skywalker. Really? You've never met me. I genuinely, because I fundamentally just don't think this is a film. I think it is a, it's a kind of a mishmash of TV episodes. And it's just cynical. Are you ever compensated for eating the galactic Mandalorian, a whopper double meal? Sure, that's what it is. I'm not a shell. I'm not a sail. You can't buy me off with a bag. As you hardly shift little Grogoo between his ribs. I ate him then stabbed him. His only word is why? Anyway, three stars in for the Mandalorian and Grogoo, who are not the only small screen action heroes to make the leap to feature length this week because John Krasinski's Tom Clancy's Jack Ryan is back, back, back in John Krasinski's Tom Clancy's Jack Ryan, Tom Clancy's Ghost War, which is exclusively on Prime Video. Jimbo, you're a big fan. Aren't you of John Krasinski's Tom Clancy's Jack Ryan? I am all four seasons. All of those possessives. On John Krasinski's Tom Clancy's Jeff Bezos' Prime Video. So what do you think of this? I mean, look, everyone loves Jack Ryan. I'm very much like John Krasinski's Jack Ryan. So this, there have been four seasons of this. As you said, I think one said 28. In one day? It began one season, yes. Look, Prime Video is the home of Dad Core programming. You know, Reacher's Dad Core, Cross's Dad Core, there's tons of this stuff. Jack Ryan is premium Dad Core entertainment. It really is. And it's so much fun. The first season of this is really good. The second season I will admit is a wobble. The third season is really good. And then the fourth season some people put in light. But I actually get on with it. We were going to get a spin off series. I think at one point with Michael Peniers character who's in season four and it appears. Indeed. Yeah. That never happened. But instead we have this movie, which is Jack Ryan Colon Ghost. What? Yes, I said, Ridley. Indeed. You're okay. Do you ever written down? Yes, please. Yes. I would say this is worse than any of the seasons of the show. This is directed by Andrew Bernstein. It's based on the script written by Aaron Revin and John Krasinski himself. Jim from the office. Jim from the holy shit. Jack Ryan is now out of the CIA. He is retired. He's working in the private sector on Wall Street. On Wall Street indeed. He's a money man now except his good old friend, the Wendell Pierce, as current deputy CIA director Greer asks him for a favor. And that is to go to Dubai and to pick up a package. Now why he is a retired CIA agent sent to pick up a package when I don't know many of the people who work for Wendell Pierce at the CIA could easily do that. I do not entirely know. Jack's the only one he can trust. Anyway, he goes there and meets a man named Nigel to pick up a package. It all goes a little bit wrong. Max Beasley's in there. There's a whole operation. There are terrorists. There are explosions. There are chases. There are action scenes. There is both. There is Sianna Miller. She smokes an awful lot of cigarettes, which seems to be the crux of her character. It seems to be honest. Mike November is back, which is obviously very, very exciting. We like Mike November. That's Michael Kelly's character. And then there's the plot. So the plot is, and I was discussing this in the office, and it is at once incredibly simplistic and utterly stupid, but also convoluted and entirely impenetrable. Because it's actually quite a basic story for a spy thriller, a disappointingly basic. But the details of it are so vague and hand-wavy and utterly opaque that you also have no idea what's going on from one scene to the next because they just don't bother to explain it. So you're kind of short-changed and bamboozled at the same time, which is a really weird headspace to be in watching this. But for me, this whole film lacks subtlety and lacks finesse. And if you look closely and squint, you might be able to join the dots as to why characters are doing what they're doing, but honestly, I think it's a bit of a stretch. So I love Jack Ryan. I really do. In all of his incarnations, but I really like Chris Zincki's Jack Ryan, and I really like the series. And I've actually missed it. What do you like about Chris Zincki's Jack Ryan? I think he brings an every man, personable charm to the character. He is Dr. Ryan first and foremost, and I think he's really convincing as a field agent when he picks up at M16, he does some business. But I think when he's just really, he's got this boyish charm and this kind of like affability to him that makes that character really charismatic and magnetic. He's also very smart and that comes across. Dr. Ryan. Yeah. Like he feels like you buy that from from from. 100% he has a cerebral edge to him as well. But he's just, I just think he's really watchable. Like he's watchable and everything he does. But he really, I think, carried the show for me. But he did not carry this film for me. I was so bored during this film. I felt so let down by this film. So I have not had a good week. No, we said. I said we said. And so on the Mandalore and Ruger two weeks ago. Yeah. Hells bells. Yeah. You like the TV show? I did very much. Again, a little bit up and down across various seasons. Some of the politics of the TV show swings a bit nationalistic for me. Tom Clancy. What? Seems. So look, I am, I contain multitudes. I can disapprove of nationalism and also really enjoy Jack Ryan books. Okay. Okay. God. Anyway. I think, I think James is right. And a lot of what he says, I didn't have the same degree of hatred for this. I thought, I did, yeah, I did find the storytelling opaque and also quite cliched because it basically comes down to, oh, there's a rogue super agent we have to stop. Like that's not. Essentially what it is. And but it's, you know, it's sort of embroider that with I'd actually doing anything very interesting or exciting or novel with it. And that rogue super agent is Max. Max. Beasley. That's not a spoil. It's in the first seat. Yeah. I didn't think he was bad, but he isn't called upon to do much is the problem. Like there's not much to him. We don't really know. His motivations are kind of like Ed Harris and the rock a little bit like as far as they go with that. I think there's a little bit of that. And do you think the cast and because he misheard his name, the Holy was Max beastly and they thought, that's the guy we need to pay our bad guy. Now I look, I liked, I didn't have a problem with that. I just had a problem with the storytelling. The fun of a Jack Ryan film should be the kind of the problem solving, the putting together of clues, the, you know, whether the crazy Ivan goes left or right in the second half of the hour. I mean, that's the kind of stuff that you should be into these films for these. He's an analyst, first and foremost. He is an analyst. And there's really very, very little analysis in this film. And that's not uncommon for the series to be fair. I guess that's true, but also like it doesn't, it doesn't kind of explain how it gets from A to B in a lot of cases and some of the stuff involving like servers and so is the computer liberties they take are just excruciating. My husband next to me, because I thought it was like enough to see this in the cinema. And my husband was shaking his head so frequently through this film that I worry for the health of his neck. It's in the cloud sharta. Yeah. And there's a lot of sort of, you know, Dubai product placement. Oh my God. What are you talking? Oh my God. The Jenny so Emirates airline and Dubai tourist board who I can only assume covered the budget, covered the budget for the film. The placement, it is absolutely what there is a whole conversation about. Did you know that is this why there's no crime in Dubai? Well, did you know Dubai is one of the most technologically advanced countries in the world? And we have is they are just shilling for tourists. I don't agree with that. Getting head up about product placement in movies. Yes, it can be a gregious in this, but I say wiped my galactic band of war and double whopper meal of my chin as I was watching this. I thought, you know, well, it's okay. I'm going to let it pass. And the Emirates bit with a literally talking about the seats in the black. Yeah, we know you're in first class. You're in first class. because I'm massive, I'm so proud that you shot over an hour. and Emirates playing it lasts for about, it felt like four and a half minutes. - I think it was. - And then they cut to inside and it's Mike, November and Jack having a jolly time in first class. - Lovely time. - Lovely time. - I didn't hate the experience of watching it. I just, again, I just, (laughing) Look, there is another film like this week that we're not gonna spend a lot of time on because it doesn't deserve it. But there have been films I hated this week. - James, like we just walked the way out. - We've done Madelor in four minutes. - This film I was just a bit like, it's disappointing, but look, it's still like John Krasynski as Jack Ryan running about literally at times. - Yeah. - I was like, it's perfectly fine. - It's charming. - I think it has the same problem for me that Madelorin has. It's something that should be good. Should be great. Could be great. Should be good is neither. And I think it's the disappointment and the fact that it isn't what it should have been like. And again, like Madelorin, this is painfully unsinematic at times. Painfully so. Which is again, it's a real shame because it doesn't feel as premium or as cinematic as a lot of the TV show did. And he doesn't even fight a ghost. He doesn't that's true. And it's got a war. - To be fair, there was no actual discussion of protocol involving ghosts in ghosts protocol either. So like we've got to be consistent in our criticism there, Chris. - This is very true. And what was the Rognation in Rognation? - Exactly. - Nobody knows. - Nobody knows. Nobody knows. - And the Humphretaubo came out in June. - It was the name of the ship. Come on. - It's the key part. - It's just the wrong month, Helen. - Yeah. - To go wrong. More full them, Helen. More full them. All right. Well, we gave this one two stars. - We do. - Two stars in for Jack Ryan, Ghost War. What's next? Hells bells. Let's do a roundup. - Well, we've got Finding Emily, which is worth a little moment of our time. This is a British romcom. Stay in your seats. This is not a bad thing for once. It's directed by Alicia McDonald and based on a script by Rachel Hirons. And it is really, really charming. So the idea is that Spike Fern plays Owen, who's a young man working. He's kind of a wannabe musician. He's working as the sound guy in a student union bar in Manchester, right? And he meets this girl one night and he hits it off. They have a great time. They're dancing, they're chatting. The vibes are really promising. Everything's looking right. It just feels like lightning has struck. She gives him her number at the end of the night. But she's in a rush. She's running off with her friends to another party. And she leaves off a digit of her number. And Owen, who is a romantic? He's a very sweet guy. He may look like a member of Oasis and sound like a member of Oasis. And let's be honest, dress like a member of Oasis. But he's a sweetheart. And he just really-- Like a member of Oasis. And he really just wants to find this girl. So he starts looking for Emily's in the university and trying to find this girl, this Emily. Oh, I have a question. Could he have just tried the 10 possible permittances? He doesn't know which number, which digit, obviously, she's life died. It doesn't have to be the last one. So anyway, almost immediately, he finds a girl called Emily, who is actually angrily rice from the nice guys, who is a psychology student. And she agrees to help him because, unbeknownst to Owen, she's writing about how romance can ruin your life and how trying to find the one can just be a disastrous thing. She wants to-- Where is this going to go? I know. And she basically sees him as a case study. So she kind of follows along and kind of eggs him along. And that's sort of the setup. So it's kind of an interesting one because-- I mean, she's just being a bad person. She is fully being a bad person. But she doesn't seem like a bad person generally outside this one very bad decision. She's under a lot of pressure to finish her thesis strong, to get her place in grad school so she can stay in the country. Because she is American. All this kind of stuff going on. So she is under some pressure and maybe gives her some sort of redemption, I don't know. And he's just like the sweetest little doofus that you've ever seen in your life, which makes it all the more hilarious when his efforts define the right Emily spark a campus-wide panic that this guy is maybe a predator and is trying to find a girl who totally doesn't want to be fined. Anyway, it's just-- it's a good, well-written, smart, well-acted, rom-com full of really quirky supporting characters. You've got people in their like persona, Prue and a Raja, as her professor who's completely over it and just fed up of life. You've got many drivers, the dean of students who's trying to keep it laid on all the hysteria around this guy. It's just really good, quirky people around a really charming central couple. And I had a really nice time with this. We've given it three. I personally am more in the four-star camp for this. I think this is the best British rom-com in probably since Rylane. I think it's really good. All right, we've given this one three stars. Three stars in for Finding Emily and Hills Bells. Very quickly, sadly, round up is passenger worth seeing. It is good. This is a new film from Andre Overtal. It is basically about a kind of a haunted road. So Jacob Scipio and Lou Lowbell, the latter from Foundation on Apple, are basically two young lovers on a road trip. They're living that van life. They're doing the full nomad land. And then they get haunted by the spectral presence that may have evil intent. No. I find this a little bit predictable compared to something like obsession last week, but some really good scares in here, some really clever use of what makes us nervous about car parks late at night or traveling around strange roads or just getting lost in the highways and that kind of thing. So I thought this was pretty scary. But again, as always, the usual disclaimer, I am a massive wimp. So do bear that in mind. For me, this would be a three star film. I can't see the Empire Review yet. All right. That may be online by the time you listen to this. Three stars in for passenger from Helen and real quick. There's a Tom and Jerry movie out this week, which you're saying is a film of the week. It is one of the worst things I've ever seen in my entire life. It's an absolute piece of shit. [LAUGHTER] It is basically Tom and Jerry go to ancient China and fall in with kind of exiled gods and so on and have to fight off demons. They are barely relevant to the story. The story is a mess. I have never been in a film that was so loud and yet so boring for such a long time. The opening sort of, Jerry goes to a museum scene, goes straight into then, then they get transported magically, and then there's a whole action scene. And it's kind of 30 minutes of just non-stop. No up and down, no back and forth, no give and take, just relentless noise coming at you from the screen. And yet I had to fend off the urge to sleep. I hated it so much, so so much. All right, Spike. And it is 100 minutes long. It should be 20 minutes shorter. Love Tom and Jerry, but this sounds not good. Not good. Not good. One star for Helen. One Helen star for Tom and Jerry. What's it called? The forbidden compass. That's from the subtitle generator, isn't it? It really is. Her guys, subtitle generator. Oh, tintin. Why couldn't he be minst and turned into a burger anyway? Oh! Don't want to carry over my tintin hatred from last week, do I? Not least, because that's it for this week's MPAR podcast. To la. Join us next week for more film related fun, when we'll be joined by Leo Woodle, star of tuner. No, he doesn't play a massive fish from the. I don't know if Atlantic. Is it North Atlantic? Atlantic. I don't think just Atlantic. Just water. Yeah. He plays a piano tuner. It's a good film. He's a riller with a nice little twist as well. So I am speaking to him on next week's show. That's very, very exciting. But until then, until we meet again, until that auspicious occasion, it is goodbye from. Jimbo! Goodbye, Chris. Goodbye, James. Insert plug for the pilot TV podcast here. It's goodbye from Helen. To do do. And it's goodbye from me. I hate product placement, but I have to say, guys, I have to say it. I love the galactic mandalorian double-wobb-romila from Burger King. Oh, my God. I can't wait to have another one. Jimbo, you're for it. I am. I am. Not quite so soon. Thank you, though. Really? You can bring them in warm. Or you can bring them cold. Thanks for listening to you next time. I'm fine. You're perfectly warm, though, right? I mean, I can be a microwave. Oh.