Speaker 1Shut up, and sit down. Welcome to Being On Stage, the only podcast that gives you motivation, inspiration, and confidence to be better on stage. No matter how you entertain, sing, dance, band, comedian, public speaking, MC, drag, burlesque, performance art, or street performer, this is the show for you.
Speaker 2Hey, rock stars, Reggie Dawson here, your host of the Being On Stage podcast. All about performers, for performers, by a performer, and everything you need to know for performing on stage. Listen, I want to talk about some of the decisions that you're going to be faced with as an artist and as a performer. Sometimes decisions can come in different forms, such as choosing to perform one place or another. Sometimes a decision can be more complex. Such as what to wear on stage. No. Sometimes it's making a decision to leave home. Sometimes it's not like run away, but leave home like travel. Sometimes it's making a decision to relocate. You know? So a lot of the decisions you make, some of them are going to be harder than others, and some of them are going to be pretty easy. Like, you know, perform at the perfect venue versus perform on the street. That's a pretty easy, you know, decision. I talked a few episodes back. And I know it was this month, and I'm not going to count them or anything. But I know that I talked about dealing with regret of decisions that you made, of things that you decided not to do, and things that you kind of shied away from and everything, and shying away from opportunities. But this type of decision is, the decisions I'm talking about are the ones that are just hard to make. Like, for example, one decision that could be, well, could be pretty hard to make is something as simple, as what to do next. You know? Maybe you're just, maybe you worked really hard on this show, and you have to make the decision of what to do next. Like, what follows this? But your decisions come in all shapes and all sizes, and really the premise of what I want to talk about today, and I'm already probably almost halfway done, but the point I'm trying to make today is you're going to be faced with all sorts of decisions. What to wear, what to perform. Where to perform. How much should you get paid. Should you travel? Should you not travel? Should you move? Should you send that email? Should you connect with that person? Should you switch venues that you're performing at? You know? A lot of times that happens. You can't, you can perform at one and not the other, but not both. One or the other, but not both. Sorry, I think that got a little twisted when it came out of my head. I want to tell you that it's okay to make a wrong decision. And you may not know that it's a wrong decision, and it doesn't necessarily mean that you're going to have a lot of regret. I'm going to give you an example of when I made, I made the wrong decision, but it was also the right decision at the time. But like, just hear me out. So, when I was performing at one of our local bars, I was probably like, hmm, 21, 22. So, that was like 10, 11 years ago, something like that. And I had won a local contest, and I had had this. I had this house name, and I became a house performer. I was booked, booked there, you know, two to three times a month, easily, spanning Wednesdays, Fridays, Saturdays. I was booked there all the time. It was my home. Like, I was a house performer there. Kind of like a house band, but I was a house performer. And one of the performers that had brought me in, actually the performer that had brought me in and really, like, mentored me a little bit, she, she was also a house performer. And she ended up getting. Well, I don't know if she got fired or she quit. She says she quit. They said she got fired. It's one of those employee-employer situations that I don't really like to get into, because I get into enough of that at work. So, either way, she and the venue were no longer, they no longer worked together, I guess you could say. And it was a bad split. I mean, bad split. And it was, without directly saying it, it was one or the other. So, I had a choice to make. Either, you know, follow the person that brought me in and had mentored me a little bit, or stay at this bar that I'm a house performer at getting booked regularly and a local, you know, title holder, if you will. So, I mean, that's, that's a tough decision to be faced with, especially, and listen, I'm not saying 21, 22 is young, but in comparison, it's a young age to make a decision. Do you follow your mentor and the person who, who helped you grow? Or do you follow the place that gave you your step up? And, you know, where technically you should be loyal because they're paying you monthly. What decision do you think I made? If you think I chose to go with the mentor, you were wrong. And so was I, truthfully, in the long run. And in the short run, you know, in the, in the moment, it felt like the right decision to stay with the place. That was how it was building up my career. Stay with the place that was booking me, paying me. My audience was there. My fans were there. If I went with my mentor, I would have been traveling one to two hours away to perform and to rehearse. I probably would have had to move. My entire life would have been different. Truthfully, I still would be performing and I still would be progressing and maybe the same way more or less. I'm not really sure. Probably more. But I believe that I made now. Sitting here 10 years ago, I can tell you, I believe I made the wrong decision. And that, that's, it's painful to say. It is, it is a little painful to say, you know, I made the wrong decision. I still grew. I still got better. I still accomplished a lot of things. I still was afforded a lot of opportunities, even though I stayed. But I should have went with the mentor. Why? Well, there's a lot to say for loyalty. And one of the things I've learned working for a corporate company, is it is better to be loyal to people than to a company. And you see it all the time. You see it, you see it when people are in fraternities, you know, you're loyal to those people because you're connected to them. You know, so you may see jobs from them. You may seek opportunities from them. You may seek performance opportunities from them, depending on the type of fraternity or sorority you were in. You see it with jobs. You know, at my job, for example, if I tell my employees, hey, the company needs you. I need you to do this, that's not happening. But if I come to a place where it's like, listen, I need you to, I need you to do this for me, for the team, for all of us, then it's a completely different reaction. And it's the same thing when you're making, and that's where I'm getting with my decision, is I should have been loyal to the person and not to a business, because at the end of the day, a business is a business. The minute you stop bringing them money, they have no reason, they have no need for you anymore. And it's not that the people, the people behind the business don't like you, and it's not that the people, you know, the other people involved in the business or the venue, and I'm talking about the venue, because the venue that you perform at, that bar, that stage, that festival, that's a venue. And that's a business. They need to make money, whether they're non-profit or for-profit, it's a business, they need to make money. And I stayed loyal to a business. And ultimately, it bit me in the backside, because when I was going through some rough times, or when I rubbed people the wrong way, or when I didn't quite bring in the same amount of people as I did before, my bookings backed off. Why? I'm not bringing them money. It's an honest decision to make. The people behind the business, they love me. But from a business decision, and you have to understand this about your venues, from a business perspective, if the entertainer is not doing one of three things, one being entertaining people, keeping people there, or bringing people in, if you're not doing one or all of those three things, they have no need for you. There's no purpose for them to book you, than to give you a shot. And what, that's not to make any money. I'm talking to you as a business now. For my decision that I made, I should have followed the person. I should have went with the mentor. I probably would have experienced more growth, a few more opportunities, but I would have been inconvenienced. Was it necessarily something I regret? Yes and no. The only reason I regret it, is because me and that mentor, our relationship was never the same. Ever. I could message her on Facebook now. Actually, I have messaged her on Facebook. She doesn't respond, really. And it might be a while before she does respond. And it's because, when you go through something like that, and you choose, when you choose one thing over another, especially if the other is a person, it messes with your relationship. And that's kind of what happened with us. Our relationship was never the same. Never. Ever. We're not as close. I didn't get very many opportunities after that. And I can't blame her. I showed my loyalties, and they were not good. It's a little shameful to say, but I'm honest. And that's something I'll never be faulted for, I guess. When you're faced with a tough decision, I guess the message here is, go ahead and make the decision that's right for you at the time. But it's okay if it's the wrong one, because you're gonna have decisions. You're going to have opportunities either way, but it's okay to make wrong decisions. It doesn't make them bad decisions, but it's okay to make wrong decisions. It happens. As long as you keep moving forward, don't get stuck. But I will tell you one last thing. From personal experience, if you have the choice between following this business that's booking you and this person that mentored you or was there for you or that has supported you, you got to choose the person every time because I've already explained how the business is going to work. Once you're no longer good for business, you're no longer good for business. But that loyalty, that friendship, that support system you build with that person, that's going to last so much longer. With that, I'll leave you with my normal. If you need to jump on my calendar and you need to talk some things out, I can help you come to that decision. I can work with you. I mean, not just about decision making, but anything that you need a little kick in the pants for, a little motivation, a little confidence kick. Or if you just need to talk through some ideas you have for your next show, hop on my calendar, beingonstage.com slash calendar. That's what I do. I coach performers, help them to improve their audience connection, their fan base, and ultimately improve their overall performance on stage. So if you need any help, I guess we can call it, hit me up. With that, I'll leave you. Keep on shining. Have a great day.
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