Liza Soberano & The Trauma Olympics

When I'm around all the rich people, I just. No, I just. I absorb it. I absorb it. If you shake your cheeks at a country club, you're kicking you out, dude. I levitate, you know what I mean? And I absorb the money. You know what? You don't get one. No, no, no. Give me the fucking pen. You don't get one. You get one. You don't get one. Your excitement level was not at the level of what I needed it to be. No, I'm more like. That's my manga. She goes, oh, wow. Yeah. No, I didn't know that you had one. I didn't know that you liked anime. Well, I don't know a lot of things about you. I know. So. Anything good happening in my life, you would turn it down, I think. No. Hey, you know, I just had a baby. Oh, that's pretty cool. Why do you like that? I'm just mellow. Give her a round of applause. Liza Soborano. Soborano. You don't have to. You don't have to. I wear them. Just get that mic really close. Yeah. Okay. Okay. I kind of want to see what it's like. You try it. Will you try it in your ears? Hello. Hello. I actually like that. Yeah. You like it? Yeah. I like it too. All right. So give her a round of applause. She's in a new movie called Forgotten Island. It's so good. Yeah. It is so freaking good. Let me guess what it's about. Okay. There's mythical creatures. Lots of it. Right. Like a talking. There's got to be a talking bird. Oh, there is a bird. Yeah. He sings? There's a rhino. No. No. We don't have those in the Philippines. Oh, it's fucking. Why would a rhino. Oh, it's basically. Were you going to narrow it down for me? I don't know if the Forgotten Island was in the fucking Philippines. Well, you said you wanted to guess. All right. Let me guess. That's better. And don't say anything else. There's sheep? Lamb. You have lamb there. I've seen lamb. No, we don't. Lamb is not a big. What was that thing tied to the fucking. It was a goat. A goat. We had tons of goats. That's what I meant. But we don't have goats. Wait. What was tied to what? He went to a sorry, sorry store in the Philippines. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. No, you're. I'm sorry. Is that what you said? I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Yeah, yeah. I'm sorry. And we were feeding villagers, local villagers, you know, and. Why did you say it like that? Because. Like we're a primitive group or something. We went to the local villagers. No, I brought. They were hungry for tiger. I brought, you know, electricity. Yeah, you did. Yeah, yeah. And shoes. It was incredible. You brought spaghetti. I brought spaghetti. Yeah. And we teamed up with a soup kitchen. Yeah. We teamed up with a soup kitchen for a day. Yeah. And we met with a lot of, like, kids and families. And in the distance, there was a metal spike sticking out of the ground and a chain and one goat. Petgold. Oh. I know it. Yeah. I know what you're talking about. Yeah. So is there a goat in Forgotten Island? Actually, there isn't. No. Uh-uh. Okay. How about. Or maybe there is, but we have to. If this is not in Forgotten Island, fuck Forgotten Island. Okay. I'm going to tell you right now. You got to have one of those gigantic bats in it. No. You know those fucking gigantic bats you have? That's a signature. That's a real creature. We're talking about mythical. We tell you about the mythical creature. Okay. Okay. Forget that. The one that smokes. The man that smokes in the tree. Yes, yes, yes. Yes, we have that. There's no way you have that man. We have him. It's Jokoy. Yeah. He does. Jokoy plays it. Jokoy got that? Yeah. Oh, because he's Filipino. Yeah. Oh, fuck. Jokoy is a capre. What? He's a capre. He's the mythical guy who smokes. It's the tree man who smokes in the tree. You should call Joe. Right? You should call Joe right now. He'll never pick up. He doesn't pick up. He takes four hours. Go ahead. Try. Try. I'll try. Just say, you played a capre. Capre? Yeah. Capre? Capre? Okay. Hold on. Jokoy. How do you spell that? J-O-K-O-Y. You're close friends. Jokoy. There we go. Here we go. He's not going to pick up. When was the last time he picked up for you? Never. Oh, my God. Five hours later. Hey, Bobby. It's my agent. But he represents Jokoy. You called CAA. Yeah, I called CAA. Can you get me Jokoy's number, please? Text it to me. This is so sad. Will you? This is getting sad. I'll do it right now. I'll do it. I love you. Bye. Love you. Bye. Holy shit. Joe sounds different. He's like, this is CAA? I called CAA. Because I don't know what happened. We've texted. That's so sad, Bobby. That's so embarrassing. What was your last text to him? It's so embarrassing. What year? Liza's probably talked to Joe recently. But anyway, welcome to the show, Forgotten Island. Forgotten Island. You guessed zero of the mythical creatures. Yeah. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I don't even know American mythology. I think I know five mythical creatures across all landscapes of mythical. Okay? Let's all go around. Loch Ness Monster. That doesn't belong. That's not American. It's English. Whatever. I'm just saying. That's what I'm telling you. That's what I'm saying. I don't know American ones. I know just global. Chupacabra. Mexico. Mexico. Mexico, right? I'll memorize one from every country. Okay. Right? From every country, right? So the fucking smoking man in the tree. Yeah, Capri. Capri. Capra, right? Capri. Capri. Whatever. Get it right. Get it right. Capri. Capri. Is there one in Korea? What? Yeah, Koreans don't have any cool mythological. We don't have mythological. We have humans there. They're mythological enough. Wait, you guys don't have mythological creatures? Can you look up Korean mythological creatures, please? Because I've never even Googled it. What? That's kind of boring. I bet you money we have ones that beat yours. No, I don't think so. I doubt that. I doubt that. So here, Liza, check it out. He's going to name some, I don't even know them. He's going to name Korean mythological creatures, and we'll do a combat, like Dungeons and Dragons. Okay, okay. Okay? So go ahead. We got the. I like the screen, please. Thank you. Yeah, we're going to look for the screen. Yeah, yeah. Exhibit A. Thank you. Thank you. Does anybody work here? Thank you. Okay, here we go. Korean mythological creatures. Bul-Gae. Okay, Bul-Gae will fuck up that tree, man. What is Bul-Gae? Okay, it's a fire dog almost? It's a fire dog, dude. A lot of fire dogs. Right. Dok-A-B. That looks like my cousin Toby. Okay? Let's. Gumiho. Oh, I know a Gumiho, yeah. What is Gumiho, then? They're like fox girls, right? Fox girls. And what are their powers? They made a show about that. How do you know this? Yeah. I watch My Girlfriend is a Gumiho. Yeah. There's a show? Then you know what it is. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Wait, what are their superpowers? They turn into, like, these white wolves. Yeah. And then? Yeah. They're just, like, badass. Like, you know, they do cool things. Yeah, and we have a rabbit alchemist. Do you guys have one of those? A rabbit alchemist? Look at it. Zoom down, zoom down. Where is it? The rabbit down there. Do you have a Daltoki? Daltoki. You don't have a Daltoki. It's just, honestly, a little rabbit, like, pounding things into. Like, alchemy. Like, galangal and peppers. Why does it kind of feel like the Chinese, um, what do you call it? Like, yeah, the Chinese zodiac. You guys sold us the zodiac circle. Also, I'm sorry, but your Bulgasari just looks like a woolly mammoth. Okay, first of all, let me say something to you right now, okay? You can't face a Bulgasari. Bulgarasari. All right. But do you have. That's how you say it. You say it slow. But do you guys have anything that can beat a Manananggal? I doubt that. Look up Manananggal. You defend it. You know what? You like the Manananggal? Oh, yeah. Do you know what a Manananggal is? Tell me what the Manananggal is. It's a lady who lost her baby, and so she, like, tears apart, like, her torso splits from the rest of her body. She goes out hunting for pregnant women to steal their babies. So cool. That's so cool. This is in a children's film, so. And then we have a demon baby called a Chanak. A Chanak? Chanak is a demon baby. I feel like if you were a mythical creature in the Philippines, you'd be a Chanak. I honestly, I'm like, wait, this is based on Bobby Lee. I always think that. Look up Chanak. So do you know what the lore of the Chanak is? No, I don't. Give me the lore of the Chanak. It's very dark. I don't even know if DreamWorks would want me to. Do it. Who cares about it? But the Chanak apparently is a baby that got aborted. That's a Filipino baby. And so now it's like a baby that goes, like, haunting people. Oh, that's sad. It's a baby longing to be alive. But the Chanak in Forgotten Island is Bungi. It's Bungi. Bungi. Or Bungi. They call him Bungi in the movie, but it's Bungi. It's Manny. Bungi as in Bungi? Toothless, yeah. Oh, okay. And he's like a, it's so, oh. He does not look like that in Forgotten Island. Look at, look at. It's Manny, right? Yes, Manny Jacinto. Jacinto, okay. Aw. But they're so cute. Let me ask you something. If this, this group of dudes aren't in the fucking Forgotten Island, I'm done, I'm not going to watch it. Who? The, the, the. Iqbalang? Dante. What's his name? Dante Bosco? The Bosco Brothers. They're Filipino, right? If all the Bosco. No, no, I want to say something. Right now, Liza, okay? The Bosco Brothers are Hollywood legends, okay? Look at me right now with your eyes, okay? Your dream work eyes. Look at me with your eyes, okay? The Bosco Brothers are legends. If they're not in the movie, forget Forgotten Island. Are they in the movie? I don't think so. No. They were at the premiere. Maybe there was a conflict. Couldn't that be you? Yeah, but I'm not Filipino. But Ronnie Chang is in it. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Oh, no, you just pissed him off. Wait, wait, wait, wait. Oh, no, you just started a war, Liza. Yeah, he's King Truffle Waffle. Oh, really? Is Ken Jeong in it? No. What kind of movie? Let me say something to you, Liza. You, if you're making a Hollywood production. And there's Asians in it. And you tell your Asian producer friends, whoever you have on lockdown, if Ken Jeong's not in the movie, we do not watch. He's King Asian. What? Yeah, let's hail Ken Jeong. Let's hail Ken Jeong. Oh, God, ew. That's so weird. Oh, God, it's Ken Jeong who gung-gi-gung-gi-goo. So. So anyways, the film has Ronny Chieng in it. So, when is this over? Are you related to Ken Jeong? No, but we're old friends, dude. And I just, you know, I have, Ronny's in it. You love Ronny, though. Let me call Ronny. Actually, you should call everyone. I'm gonna call everyone that's in the thing and see if they pick up. And I think. But you know, what makes me sad, Bobby, is that you've been to the Philippines so many times and you weren't asked. I know, I was never asked. I've been to the Philippines way more than Ronny Chieng. You asked Ronny Chieng? I don't think so, because Ronny is actually, like. He travels there. Hold on, hold on. He's from there. If he doesn't pick up, dude, I'm done with this guy. Are you calling CAA again? Yes. It's New York Lake. Do you know who would pick up? Tell me. I don't want to put him, I don't want to put the pressure on him, but Dave Franco. Oh, I know Dave would. Yeah, is Dave in the movie? Yes. He's a huge role. He's a dog. Wait, Dave Franco's in Forgotten Island? He's like a huge role. Did everybody watch it? Because now I have Liza, and I know two people. Yes. I know Joe, too. I know Ronny. I know a lot of people. Yeah, I know a lot of people in the movie. Probably everybody in the movie. So you're trying to say, watch the movie is what you're trying to say. So what I'm trying to try. Wait, wasn't Dave here, like, promoting it? Yes, he was. What happened to your memory? I have no memory. Like, of a nap. Yeah, I have a memory of a nap. So I thought, you know, can I say something to you, Liza? I'm sorry. I'm an old, fragile man. I'm an old, fragile man, right? And I'm weak, mentally, and I don't know much. Yeah, it's declining. I don't know much about anything. So just, can you guys ease up on me? Oh, that's what we have in the Philippines. That's in the movie, A Memory Demon. What is one? It's Jenny Slate. I think. Who is it? Jenny Slate. That's who's playing it? You're going to call her, too? Should I call Jenny? You know what? I don't have to. Me and Ken, we don't have to be in every Asian project. I've never been in any of them. You act like you're a crazy person. I've never been in any Asian project. And I'm like, who's saying you guys need to be in? Well, because, I'll tell you why, Liza. You're the new wave coming up, right? And us old folks want to get a taste. Right? What you don't realize is that everything you're doing right now is super exciting. Because I'll tell you what, there's an unknown. You can get a call at any moment and go, you want to be the lead in this movie, right? Those days are over for me. How do you know? Because it hasn't ever happened. Well, then there's more opportunity for it to happen. I'm 55, so it's never going to happen. Maybe there's a rom-com with you and Liza. She's my daughter. Your wife would have to be. Kalilah. Yeah. Our baby would not look like you. Our baby would like. Kalilah is gorgeous. What are you talking about? I know, but I fuck up the pool. I mean, yeah, I don't have Korean blood in me, so you wouldn't. I don't think that you would fuck up any pool. I don't think so. Tell me more. I think you're cute. Aw. Yeah. I think with your girlfriend now, you could make Eliza. I saw your teenage pictures. You look really like him. Cutie, right? What did I do to my body? You probably didn't take care of it. And there's where we went wrong. That is where we went wrong. The way you did that, though, was cruel because. It was innocent, but it was the biggest slam of the month. Slam of the month. I've been around a lot of comedians, too, and that one cut deep. Really good one. That really cut deep. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Sorry. So go back to that baby picture. I was going to put up the cast. Very good looking cast. What a cast. The one in the middle in the. Dolly is in it. Who's that guy? Oh my God, Bobby. That's Manny. Your favorite movie of two years ago. Triangle of Sadness. Who was your favorite lady in that? The Filipino lady. Yes, she's in it. Oh, wow. She's my. Well, not my grandma. She's Gabby's grandma. Interesting. Yeah. Can I ask you another question about the movie? We'll move on from it. We're going to get into your life. Oh, Shopify. Shopify. For your business. Business. Oh, Shopify. Shopify. For your business. 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So we've decided to invite our funniest friends. To talk about what pisses them off. It's available everywhere you get your podcasts. With video available on Spotify and YouTube. We'll see you there. What's up? I'm Sam Salem. And this is my new podcast, After School Snack with All Things Comedy. A show where my friends tell me a beloved childhood snack. And despite my terrible cooking skills, I make it from scratch. Which sometimes leads to reactions like this. Does it taste just like your mom's? No. It tastes like. But other times, reactions like this. Mmm. This is really good. I'm really. I have hard Pilates class. And I'd like to say that I'm a pretty well-researched guy. But don't take my word for it. See what my guests have to say. You the fans. Wait, where did you get this? Nah, this is crazy, bro. Stop! And it's produced by. Max Castillo, a.k.a. Big Time Macca. I make a theme song for each guest. And unlike Sam's cooking, it always goes exactly like this. Man, you a real musician, bro. After School Snack dropping every Thursday wherever you get your podcasts. And make sure to watch on YouTube and Spotify. Video. This program going to the top. I appreciate you. Hey, it's Mateo Lane. And Nick Smith. From the I Never Liked You podcast. And we are two best friends. Friends. We are two work colleagues who happen to have a podcast where we bicker, banter. Argue. Complain. And laugh. Well. Well. We try. And solve world hunger. I thought you were going to say mysteries. And we solve mysteries. We solve mysteries. Are we the same? Are we the Scooby-Doo gang? We are. We also discuss topics anywhere from pop culture, what's happening right now, to. Our personal lives. And who we think is gay. We drop new episodes every Thursday on whatever platform you watch or listen to podcasts. hello i'm stand-up comedian leslie leo joined by stand-up comedian jason chelly oh that's not how we talk disgusting we do a podcast together called happy fun times and the purpose of the podcast is to share moments of joy and obviously hatred hatred extreme hatred for each other and for the way we live our lives we talk about human behavior social norms and we fight yes and you do it wrong and i do it right and i do it right if you want to have a if you want to have a happy fun time with two sad funny comedians you can find our podcast exactly and spotify spotify apple pay apple no apple podcasts and if you're listening to this you know exactly where to find your podcast tune in tune in we hope to hear and see you there can i ask you another question about the movie we'll move on from it we're gonna get into your life but um is amy hill in it i'm not sure who i don't think she is you don't know who amy hill is but amy hill is a connection is to hawaii hawaii yeah hawaii is you know look up amy hill you have to know amy hill she's the lady from the first dates wait i love 50 first date yeah she's the she's the the diner owner diner owner oh no she's not an owner of a diner owner oh no she's not an wait is she filipino she probably is she plays filipino look at that that's her yes i love her why can't you have her in the movie i would love to have her call amy i'll call amy why aren't you i'm gonna call amy no you're definitely calling i'll call amy is she spider-man's grandma like not spider-man's grandma what's his name ned's grandma no that's not her that's not the lola oh okay but amy hill is like she played a lot of filipinos in her career because there weren't any filipinos here we go here we go amy hill no one's picking up i'm a loser today no amy i'm anti-amy will pick up okay and if she doesn't oh my god you really are a loser oh my god oh my god hi amy i cannot believe you're calling me why i'm your friend i know i and i'm so appreciative of that yeah why are you why aren't you in the movie forgotten island tell her who we have on the no we yeah tell her we're on a podcast oh yeah yeah we're on a podcast we're on tiger belly we have we have liza but i did see uh leah the other day she was in town doing her concerts and um she's very excited about it and i'm gonna go see it because i'm very excited i love filipino stories i know you do i know you do but but when it comes to anything island if you're not in the fucking thing it makes me so fucking bad i could be in it but nobody asked all right all right so i'm gonna make some phone calls all right you got to be in part two okay okay i love you amy i love you bye bye so we got that solved did we solve you're just calling people i don't know why i'm calling what's crazy is that one answer he just offered her a role in the part two and he's not even a part of the film you're not even in the movie you have no ep credit right i'm a producer of forgotten island too now that's how you do it yeah yeah you're fired yeah yeah you're not in the second movie but anyway yeah yeah yeah um i'm gonna use your brother okay i love your brother anyway um you're obsessed with her what you're obsessed there's something about his face i'm really obsessed with it's like handsome in a compact way your brother's face is handsome in this area right here but the shape of his face doesn't fully embody like if it was a little bit you know i mean but it's a great face you know i think the same thing but honestly i think it's the haircut it's all about the core with this one you know i mean a strong core with this one you know but i like his face but should we should we get to know you should we get to know liza okay you know we'll get there in um our own time when is that bobby well you know let's let's just how about this song a song maybe so we'll ease into it let's just let how about this you know um let's check in everybody check in okay and how we feel and then we'll slowly start with jules because she was late yeah what were you late i fell asleep you're supposed to lie and you're supposed to but i was in altadena because i'm dog sitting two dogs right yeah so there was traffic i woke up at 3 30 and yeah i had to go here you woke up at 3 30 p.m yeah how old are you 24 damn it's hard being what time did you wake up liza i woke up at six today because i had two self-tapes this morning tell me about those and out of this group who does the self-tape with you anybody um sometimes kimmy sometimes nate i had to stop because like i started getting a lot of rom-com like auditions and it's weird doing it with your brother your brother yeah yeah yeah yeah i could see you in a rom-com thank you yeah i i used to do a lot of rom-coms in the philippines yes yeah um how did okay now this is how we segway to help you yeah i want how brilliant i am do you think do you think you can explain to bobby what a love team is and what that looks like oh god it's one of my favorite movies um i thank you i like this movie too but at the same time i don't like the misogynistic take on it yeah me very much um give me the massage i don't even know what any of that means sorry so it's to tell me about what it is but i was about to buy this on blu-ray misogynistic i don't want to see it my x and my y story i only like came to realize this though because of bernard like i didn't bernard told you it was misogynistic yeah why is it like bernard on the mic right here bernard why is it misogynistic the movie yeah can you explain context bernard was also a groomsman of mine at my wedding and bobby and him hung out we love bernard we love bernard what's up guys uh i watched it and uh it was uh the story was very unfair to flies's character example um i forgot what happened my character gets cheated on basically and then she becomes a popular like blogger because she writes about like all the the fuck ups that went happened in their relationship and then later on people start hating on her for being such a man hater and then she gets like canceled and so she's now trying to make up with her ex so that she can prove to everyone that they're okay wait the one that cheated on her yeah oh ew yeah this guy like that is he a good guy gilded he's my ex that's her actual oh maybe you should explain how movies work then yeah you have to bobby i'm telling you like and i mean we love him right or no do we love him um yeah yeah yeah may you work may you work is so funny i mean like you know yeah i love him as a guy i'm a human being i have mutual you don't talk to him anymore no not at all you know i think that you and i are a rarity bobby and that you should be so thankful you should be grateful how open and great i am you should be so thankful for me in your life you should you should be so grateful that you have you know i mean a mesmerizing dream weaver that's what i am so you're welcome you're welcome let's move on so um what does a mesmerizing dream weaver mean well i manifest that's a part of it you manifest? you just like hold your crystals and like manifest things you know what you know what i love naysayers like this right because she's talking from the darkness right i i talk from the light you talk you guys all talk from the dark i don't know yeah you do you're all living in the darkness right we live in the light we know bernard yeah bernard and i live in the light yeah we're light livers light yeah so you know but anyway um so back to the you so you got your start i'm going to the childhood i know and i'm interjecting so you out what i i got it handled all right so you were born and raised in america yes and then you went to the philippines to act not to act um i went to the philippines when i was 10 because i well what happened was i was in foster care from like three to four why why is that too dark no it's not too dark but it's like why else would anyone be in foster care can i guess yeah okay um your parents weren't around i mean they were just not with me drugs involved yes both parents yes i'm sorry my dad was an alcoholic probably not the same but uh yeah see when it gets weird i i laugh so um i like it's not weird it's so i'm sorry so three or four and then you moved it went in family at 10 yes sorry i'm getting weird now too because i like to get really dark and i just had to suppress it because we're gonna get dark we're gonna get dark in fact we have a game called trauma olympics i love this okay it's like the pain olympics have you ever seen that yeah oh my god like back then the pain oh my god they were not good nasty not good oh so you guys want to go through your most traumatic thing well let's what are the categories i want to know the rules of the game before i play what are the rules guild the actual rules well i was going to throw it to you claudia for the okay so the actual rules of this game is as follows gilbert is going to throw us a category for example relationship trauma and we're each going to give two sentences of our worst trauma from a relationship and then Gilbert and Alex are going to tell us who wins the round and we're going to keep going each round. You can't tell me it's a competition because I'm going to embellish them. Yeah, that's what I thought too. You can't lie! I will embellish. No, I say you keep it honest because there's some that you will win. Yeah. I will be as honest as I could possibly be during this challenge, my lady. Ladies. Moom ladies. Yeah, my ladies. And I will be forthright and becoming Okay. Alright, so let us start the game. But if you call, I will call bullshit if I know that it's a lie. Okay. But how about this? Already your energy is pointing. Oh, yeah. That's right. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So, you know, fuck all you guys. Is that like a Korean thing? I noticed like I have Korean friends that are like, whenever people are pointing, they're like, don't point, use your whole hand. Yes. But isn't that five fingers to you? This is fucking Palpatine. Senator Palpatine. You don't know Senator Palpatine? We're using electricity. The dark side. Let's move on. Let's go start. Great reference. It's a terrible reference. I'm off. But that's what, that's what, this is all about an experimental of ideas. It's true. Alright, let's throw it out there. Eliza, give me a high five. Let's go. That's me. I told you. Alright, so anyway. Let's go to the game. Thank you for doing Senator Palpatine. Jules, you'll help me to take a listen at some of these. Alright. We start with childhood. Trauma. Okay. Something centered around your childhood. Okay. We'll start with Kalilah first. Ease us in. Okay. I was ****ed by a family member at the age of eight and was not believed. Oh, sorry. I shouldn't clap. Don't clap. No clapping. The clapping makes it weird. Yeah. Not believed. It is a real trauma. I'm so sorry. Thank you. Jules? I guess my dad left me. Oh, that is true. He abandoned you. He abandoned you. You were abandoned. For a Korean family. For a Korean family. Why? Why did that happen? He just chose them. Yeah. Wait, your dad abandoned you for a Korean family? So there was already a mom and a dad and kids and he just joined that family? I'm sorry. How does that work? That's a crazy. Good question, Liza. Caught you in a lie. So go ahead. Caught you in a lie. Yeah. This is True Detectives. I swear. Season 8. I don't know. I don't know. Wow. It's a war. Okay. That's pretty sad. Liza, thank you. Sorry. Hmm. I have like a treasure chest full of We're doing best ofs because I have a treasure chest. We're doing best ofs. I don't want to. I don't feel like sharing the best of because it's a little too dark. So maybe I'll start with Hmm. I I'll put someone I don't care about anymore under the bus. When I was in foster care, the person that kind of like took me in was my mom's best friend from high school. And the reason why she's took me in is because she actually secretly hated my mom. And she specifically wanted to get me to like hurt me. Oh. And do bad things to me. My God. So she only did bad things to me, not my little brother. Not this brother, but I have another brother. Does he have the same kind of face? Please tell me yes. Yes. Okay, good. I need it compact. I need it compact. And I need it all here. His face is actually, my other brother's face is even smaller. I can't wait. So hell. Jackpot. Jackpot. Jackpot, dude. Is it all here? His smaller head? He looks more like, you know like Phineas and Ferb? Like he's like a Phineas. Oh my God. He's like very pointy and like small. Like a fucking Vulcan. Yeah. You know what a Vulcan is? A bird? No. No. I was That's what I was thinking. She's trying to say it looks like this. Wow. I want to meet one of those. I want to meet one of those live. Alright, so that was And what were the bad things? Can you name one thing horrible that she did? She already did Okay, sorry. Diving in. Well. The wound's open. I've like shared it in the past, but like she would do this like weird thing where like they would have like family movie nights and I specifically had to sit in like a, you know like a Balikbayan box? Like a cardboard box? You had to sit in a box? She had me sit in a box next to the couch and then she was like, you're the family doggy. What? And then I would just like sit there and watch the movie from the box while everyone else would be like on the couch or like on the carpet just laying down. How are you not a drug addict? That's what I asked myself. Every day. Wow, look at what you've become. That, yeah. With that kind of childhood. That's amazing. Yeah, being a family dog. I don't think you can beat that, Bobby. I don't care. I had a Christian family and, you know, we went to church every Sunday and really nothing bad happened really. how did you turn out? Turn out what? So fun. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So finish what you're about to, follow your line of thinking here. Okay? No, can I? No, no, just listen. I love the line of thinking, right? How did I turn out like what the fuck are you saying, Liza? How did I fucking turn out what? Tell me. Speak the truth, lady. No, there's some videos of yours that I've watched that I'm just like, how did this happen to you? I want to know the videos. No, no, don't pull up any videos, dude. Okay, so. Family trauma, Bobby. Alright, so when I was nine, my brother was six, we shared the same room in Minnesota. I've shared this so many times. I don't know why I'm sharing it again, but we shared the same room, and three in the morning, you know, you just heard, like, commotion. Oh, yeah. Plates being crashed, all kinds of stuff. Why are you laughing? This is how we call it. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Kimmy is literally, like, doing this laughing. She's like, yeah, like, what the? 1990s Arsenio Hall show. She wants to go, woo, woo, woo, you know what I mean? Because the thing is, me and her do trauma Olympics every day, so. Oh, okay. So she probably wants to participate. It's so true. It's kind of like, if you don't laugh, you'll die. That's always how I viewed it. It's like, if I don't sit here and, like, talk about it in the way that I do, I feel like it will kill me. So it's like, there's no other way for it to escape my body than this way. And honestly, it's probably inappropriate to, like, laugh as hard as we do about trauma, but it's like, I'll die otherwise. Okay, let me finish. Go ahead. So, um, this commotion and stuff, and then I remember, like, my mom running into the room, and she turns the lights on, and I look at her mouth, and she has a tooth missing right here, and my dad punched it out. And then in Korean, she goes, um, to my brother, you know, that's our names, help me bombard the door. Oh, my God. Like, barricade it? Barricade it, because my dad was drunk in a violent rage. Oh, my God. So, I remember my brother and I and my mom, my dad's trying to get in, right? And he gets in, and I don't remember anything after that. But you remember being a kid, the door was just slamming. Slamming, yeah, yeah. Judges? Judges. Honestly, these are all pretty terrible. How would, no, I need everyone to be a judge, not just you two. Okay, yeah. You want Compact? I need Compact to be a judge, because he's the brightest. Okay. With that face, dude, there's brightness going on in there. Go ahead. Alright, we'll start at Compact, and I'll announce it. Compact, tell me. You can just, uh, out of all those four, I don't recall it Compact. You started doing it. You called it. I said his face is Compact, but you're calling him as, like, he's like a name. Like Cher, or Prince. You know what I mean? He's not, he's not. That's kind of cool. Yo, Compact! Yo, Compact! That's your new name. You're fucked. Alright, anyway, tell me, tell us your judgment. Out of those four, what do you feel gets you the most like, damn, that was tough. It's about storytelling. Oh, I didn't, I wasn't dramatic enough. Okay, before we move on, you had it, a couple of you guys had it, but he put a lot of details and put a motion into it. Okay. Yeah. We didn't know that we had to put in motion. That's what I'm looking for. What do you think the story is, Jules? I thought we just had to give an example. That's true. Round two. Let's go. It's a competition, right? You have to fucking. Wait, hold on, I won that. Kimmy. No, go ahead. Everyone go down the line. Kimmy, who did you think since you are into this? We got Liza. Liza won. She's my bestie, so she's. Yeah, you're a liar. Bernard. You're a liar. Bernard. Bernard. There's a chance for you to pitch a movie to Bobby after this. The diddling, the diddling didn't move anywhere. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You didn't deliver it. You want to do a movie with me? I didn't deliver it. You want to sell a script? Huh? I'm hot right now. Let's go. Got Kalilah's very sad diddling story. Jules, Zad left her for Korean family, which is insane. We got Liza's very sad story and Bobby's very sad story. As a writer, maybe view it and like how you can make a script. There wasn't a lot of details, but like if I sink into it and then like kind of think about it, Kalilah's. Thank you guys. That's a point to me. A point to me. All right, good. Fair enough. Fair enough. I was going to go. We will not be working together. Kalilah will not be working together. I like the other one, Alex. I was going to go. Kalilah. Oh, you are. Yes. Okay. What about you, Gil? Just not to interfere with what's happening. I do think it's funny, but also very sad that. Jules' dad left for an entire Korean family. I know, especially for a Filipino. It's a funny story, but yeah, but she doesn't care and she never cared. I think she might be affected by it. Look at her face. She does have sad eyes, which is you got to fix those. Yeah, I mean, you can't be walking around in the world and be all sad eyed. But all of them, we got Prince, we got Alfred, this coffee. You got things to do. Round two. Does Bobby ever trigger the trauma for you? Mm hmm. I don't think so. They're like roommates because he's he's a Korean man. Yeah. Oh, that's very, very interesting. Well, I think when they got they broke up, I think it triggered. - Yeah, that's what I was thinking too. and the way we delivered the divorce news was really hard on Jules because she was very young and we brought her into the room and we're like hey Jules we're breaking up and then we high-fived let's go to the spa yeah how did you react did you laugh or are you kind of like I just didn't understand and because they were like they looked like happy what's happening we weren't trying it's because we didn't want to look like we wanted to come together for you we I want we wanted to show you that hey we're actually gonna break up but we're gonna still he's still gonna be a part of your life and stuff like that but anyway I don't know why round two just to mix it up we'll reverse it so you can't listen to other stories and try to top it so we'll start here and go this way oh you think yeah okay give me the question category this one let's go drug related perhaps oh okay okay drug related yeah all right so is it it's not improv drug related no no what I'm saying is I need to be a little bit more specific all right you is it a drug related story that is outside of me or is it meet my drug it just has to do with your trauma and uh like an improv herald that's your inspiration drug okay um when I was in high school um you know I you know I liked women you know that okay that was crazy to say you don't have to prove that to us so only when you were in high school you fucked up on the detail I don't know why you said high school when I was in high school I liked women now anyway um you know what you want a war you want to have a war with Bobby Lee I'm kidding thank you for doing this podcast we really like you a lot you're great thank you um Jules I'm gonna have you jump in right now okay you got me no no we can't skip Liza I'm gonna change the pattern there's no but no you can't change patterns go Liza oh my god um that's brutal this is traumatic for you anyway go ahead 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chicken breasts in every box for a life or filet or new york stress for a year with free shipping always that's butcherbox.com belly again that's butcherbox.com belly for sure to use our links to know we sent you if you're looking for an easier way to get great meals on the table give butcher box a try butcherbox.com belly i love it it's good what's up everybody i am jeremy elder i'm cory peter lane and i'm hunter sailing and we are the hosts of the business casual show on the all things comedy network it's a comedy podcast it's hilarious we've got bits that each of us prepare and surprise the other ones with with many guests that you know and love paul f tompkins angela giaritana joe firestone and many more past bits include making chicken flavored pop rocks bringing in a really big sword making beer thick we're the stupidest people we have been best friends for 10 years and there is no signs of stopping i think it's 11 years now we've been best friends for 11 years and it's about to end so tune in while you can every monday where you get your podcast let's do one that's just for millennials oh yeah okay what's up doggos and pupperinos you hufflepuffs are you hufflepuffs ready for a podcast that's gonna make you say wowsers then get your gym faces ready because we're about to do some crazy dwight ass stuff that's gonna blow your freaking bams off every monday wherever you get your podcasts it's traumatic for you anyway go ahead i mean i guess it's the same like my mom was also a meth addict oh yeah that's true but what did she do to you shabu shabu shabu it's like shabu shabu it's shabu i say i'm hungry i mean i guess she got better once i was born but she was never like you know can i can i give you some advice okay about her storytelling oh my god can i tell you advice of the storytelling right okay is is that um my story right there's a little bit of switches in there that are a little they're not they're not lies good story go ahead um oh mine's so minor now but um it's okay i was roofied in barackai by a an ex-boyfriend who wanted to um yeah okay that's it very good but i got away i got away i never actually it never happened i got saved by my sister very scary very scary situation okay go um compact oh yeah who wins that round i'll start i'll start this way so they can think yeah i'm gonna go with uh liza on this one i think there's something very sad about yeah baby being born into the world without even having oh it's hearsay you don't like losing huh you just want to win and that's not about winning it's just that you know there's some holes you have a winning posture though you're doing the winning posture thing i love how ruby talks like you talk like you're always disgusted at people oh wait wait i said ruby rudy okay or jules all right so um go ahead down the line oh you go ahead get alex liza yeah i think did i call you rudy liza yeah everyone liza liza yeah compact i know you are i know you are freaking cheeses on his pocket and guess what guy when i become king of what whatever round three gill round three go ahead sorry let's do i lost that one but thank you so much but can you save it for him because he would love that clip just for him so much you're a forever dude whatever you need can i also i got you whatever you need compact is a great artist name yeah are you are you saying he's a producer oh yeah that's your producer name compact because cd isn't it a compact disc yes yeah dude you're welcome throwback retro retro dude your compact disc just compact just compact so is there any more categories because i'm losing this one is uh we're gonna move to um anything um physical or violence related oh weapons can come to mind all right i have so many crazy uncles anything like that what kind of weapon i have every weapon i know you have a whole treasure chest of weapon stories yeah i do yeah all right go this way let's start with kalilah go ahead i mean infamously my paint this one out yeah my over a money dispute my uncle took a machete and sliced my other uncle in half and severed his spinal cord in broad daylight can i just say something yeah yeah yeah all right your uncle's a great guy i met him he became friends with yeah yeah because and i say this only because when i go to the philippines i want him on my side bobby you're just terrified of him so you just keep throwing money at him i throw money at that is insane he's like a free man well he was not only a free man he's one of our podcast guests right there yellow the guy in the yellow right there we're to the philippines and yeah the guy in the yellow it's a really wait i cannot see his face can i just she's like i know this guy's my driver i can't zoom in but it's that guy right there that's i need to remember his face yeah but i love him man but anyway um also that what does that have to do with you i thought that's a violent it's traumatic yeah but she was here no but to know that that's my uncle that's my godfather but were you in america when that happened yeah and then we were so newly here and we didn't have money to fly back home for my the funerals and it was really sad i like that good story because you saved it at the end thank you you lied go ahead um no weapons but my ex used to beat me up and then i would have bruises all over and i would have to hide it from my parents and we'll go to school wait wide nose no in the philippines oh okay okay she had a boyfriend with the longest the widest nose it went to right to his ears the nostrils i call them wise notes go ahead sorry joel you have one um weapons related weapons i have one but i can't share it live but i want to share it with you guys anyway i have another one actually this one's a little bit more chill i don't like chill um well my brother got into a fight i'm not gonna say which brother my brother got into a fight obviously with someone um and then i found out that he had stolen a gun to do i don't know what but i found that gun and i have it to this day like hidden in a locker in the philippines wow the way you just added those details in the end that was so good yeah i don't have one weapons really violence i don't have weapons violence so your dad No, I have one for you. Do you remember when your dad took a butter knife and stabbed your uncle across the way? Oh, that's right. For calling your mom ugly. Yeah, but that's an everyday kind of. That was like a daily, you know what I mean? No, I think that could win. That's a contender. Hey, you better sell it because you had a good gun story. I know. Okay, so we lived in Poway, California. And every Sunday, right, all my uncles and aunts, like I have 28 first cousins, but a lot of them lived in Southern California or in San Diego area, right? So it's like on Sundays, they would either golf or play tennis. And at nights we would go to my house and have a grand dinner that my mom would make, right? So you would have like, you know what I mean? 40 members of cousins and all kinds of stuff, right? So my dad's sister was drunk at the dinner table. And I don't know why she said this, but she said to my dad, why did you marry my mom? She's ugly. I like fighting words. Yeah. Yeah. And my dad went, and I could see him grab a butter knife, right? Sorry, I'm not laughing. Yeah, yeah. He goes, it's good, it's good, you say. Very good, you know what I mean? And he lunges across the table, right? And nicks her. He's trying to get her throat, but like nicks her. She's bleeding, right? It's chaos. Hair is being pulled, this and that. That's not the only, there's another story I have with my dad. Another story is I have a cousin named Dong Hyung. Dong? Dong? Yeah. You know, it translates as shit brother. I don't know why we call him Dong Hyung, but we do. And we hadn't seen Dong Hyung in 10 years. And now Dong Hyung is in high school. Last time my dad saw Dong Hyung was when he was a kid. We walk in the house. Dong Hyung is now 16 years old. I'm like nine, right? And my dad goes, oh, hello, to Dong Hyung. Dong Hyung goes, ignores him. He's like a teenager and goes to his room. Doesn't say hi to my dad. My dad goes, hey, come down. Dong Hyung comes down. My dad does a Muay Thai clinch around the neck, right? And starts doing high knees to the face. This kid. Wait, this is for real? This is for real. Hey, hey, hey, right? Dong Hyung's face is, Dong Hyung's face, you know, pop, pop, right? Dong Hyung almost dies. Oh my God. Ambulance, this and that, right? Oh, Jesus Christ. Yeah. Yeah. Jesus. But what I wanted to explain to Dong Hyung is, this is every day, dog. Welcome to the party. Why is your dad so mad? He was just, so let's go to the voiding. I did two and one, two and one. You did two and one? Yeah, yeah, yeah. You went twice this round, though. Who wins? Bobby, because he had 18 stories. What a beautiful game. Liza, what are your dreams? What do you want to do? Good question, actually. Very good question. That's a great question. Great pivot. Are you being sarcastic? No, not at all. I love you. Thanks. Okay. What do I want to do? I want to say save the world, but I feel like that sounds like such a, I don't know, fake answer. It's not because you went through a lot of bullshit growing up, and a lot of times when you go through that kind of childhood, you become extremely empathetic. Mm-hmm. You know, so it's like, I can't see, like, you know what the worst videos are? When I met my dog, and the last day of my dog, you know, the two photos, right? And it's like, I don't want to see your dog dying. I hate, every time those videos pop up. Yeah, I can't do animals. Yeah. What was the movie you just saw with a dog? Marty Supreme. Marty Supreme, okay. So my whole beef with Marty Supreme is I was really into it until the scene where they leave the dog. Any kind of animal abuse in any kind of movie, I check out. Immediately in my head is. I don't like the Safdie brothers. I don't like the writers of this, of thinking that somehow. I love the Safdie brothers. I don't like anything where, to me, someone writes in what they think is entertaining, and that involves, like, being, like, cruel to a dog. I'm like, I'm out. I completely checked out of the movie after that. What about, like, Cruella? Oh, I didn't even. You know what? I watched, like, 101 Dalmatians, and maybe I was too young to kind of, like, figure it out. Then, but I. No, I don't like it. I mean, the one movie that. I made you watch. That I watched where I liked the movie, but I had to fast-forward during the scene because it makes no sense to me. Yeah. The movie Signs. Oh, yeah. When they leave the dog outside. Have you ever seen movie Signs? No, I haven't. It's these aliens, right? And they're attacking this one house. Mel Gibson's a preacher, right? And he's, like, two kids and a brother, Joaquin Phoenix. And they know that the aliens are coming. They know, okay? And so they're boarding up the house, okay? The attic, all the things, right? And then you can hear in the distance a couple of aliens coming. And in the distance, you hear their dog dying. They left their dog outside. They had ample time to bring the dog. They had hours. Yeah, to bring the dog in, and they didn't. Yeah. It's bullshit M. Night Shyamalan on Ding Dong. Yeah. You fuck. Don't do that again. Back to your dreams, though, like. You'll never hire me, so I can say that. Mm-hmm. But give me your dreams. Yeah, my dreams. Well, I really, like. I guess over the past two years, since I moved to L.A. and started working on, like. I started my own production company, and I've been working on a lot of, like, Filipino-made stories. And I realized how passionate I am about the Filipino people, and especially about Filipino children. And my dream is one day to go back to the Philippines and be able to, like, fix the education system, or, like. Also, I'm a big advocate for. Well, not advocate, but, like, I talk about how, like, the Philippines is the hotspot for online sexual exploitation of children. And so my dream is to make us not the hotspot and make sure no other country becomes the hotspot for it. That's amazing. Yeah. And you can achieve these things. I hope so. No, you will. I've been working on it. Because you have to manifest it. Yes. Yeah. Yes. I mean, I don't believe in that. Like, I actually just do stuff. No, no. Like. Excuse me? I feel like people that talk about manifesting, like, they just talk about doing stuff, but then don't do it. Yeah, I don't do it. That's exactly your point. Look at me right now, okay? I don't do it. That's the point of it, right? I don't do it, and then I believe it's going to happen, and it happens. It does. You don't think so? No, not at all. Okay, well, okay, explain to me. Because you ultimately do stuff to get the thing you want. I think that when I first met you, you had just finished reading The Secret, and it was all about manifestation, and you were living in a dump. And I was like, you can sit here and manifest all you want. If you're not going to put action to your thoughts and actually, like, do the work and pen to paper, I'm sorry, no amount of manifestation is going to land something like that. Okay, to each his own. To each his own. No, that is true, because then you started Tiger Valley. You started actually doing the work, and guess what? You clearly are brilliant. That's already available to you, and now you just had to act. You're actually the opposite of manifestation. Yeah, you're the opposite. You're one of the hardest working people I've ever met. Nothing just falls on your lap. You've literally worked so hard for everything you have. So what do you have to do now? So what? So what are you going to say now? You kind of work hard. Okay, work hard, kids. Put one foot in front of the other and walk forward. Is that what you were saying? Yeah. Walk forward into the light. Is that what you're saying? Yeah. Well, honestly, like a lot of people nowadays are just afraid to do things, I feel like. Okay, let me defend myself. Okay, so what I want to say, it's just a different language. You don't even need to know what it is, but I made it up. What I want to say, what was I talking about? Can you manifest your thoughts back into your brain? Oh, yeah. So I think you're right. The one thing that I did correctly is, of course, I went up on stage. Of course, show up here, I show up. Of course, I do all those things. But that doesn't necessarily mean that these things are going to happen when you do them, because everyone does do those things, right? I believe that it's a belief system I have that it's going to happen. Can that be a thing? Yeah, I think that's like a different interpretation of manifestation. But like you're saying, the way some people like describe manifesting something, something is a little bit tone deaf for me. Because it's as if to say, it doesn't explain a lot of the bad things that happen to good people. Like, also, by the way, manifesting is like, I want to win the lottery and like not actually buying the lottery ticket. You know, like that's not, that's just not true. You're buying the lottery ticket. I've never bought one. No, but in the analogy. Oh, in the analogy, yes, I have, I have, yeah, I have in the analogy, but I've never bought a lottery ticket. Yeah, I have. I think like manifesting. I have bought a lot. I think like manifesting makes sense in that you, you plant a seed within your own brain and like you naturally move in ways that get you to your dream. Okay, there was a billionaire, I'm just going to say something. There was a billionaire in the 60s, right? He, right. And he was like one of the first, I forgot his name. But anyway, I saw this on my TikTok. He kind of might not even be true. But, no, but I saw him speak. It's one of those AI videos. No, it was, this man was being asked, you know, if you lost all your money right now, what would you do? He goes, oh, what I would do is I would drive this. that's the nearest yacht club? or high-end country club, and just hang out at the bar. Okay. And they go, why? He goes, because I'm around the rich energy field. Okay. Yeah. And I don't, well, first of all, everyone's looking at me as if. It's already gross. I don't like where this is going. You don't believe in energy fields? Rich energy fields? What, I'm just going to fucking manifest myself into a billionaire because I'm standing around rich people? That's not even manifested. At this point, you're actually doing it, being in the network with people. When I'm around other rich people, I just, no, I just absorb it. I absorb it. If you shake your cheeks at a country club, they're kicking you out, dude. They're like, give him money. He'll go away. Give him money. You don't do this? You don't do this? I should try. Now I have to try. I'm going to a fucking yacht club tonight, I guess. Shake your cheeks. No, but this is what he said. He says, you know, if I'm around other rich people, I become rich. Well, it's like being around good people or people that are hard workers. You're going to be a hard worker. That's not true. The people you surround yourself with? Dude, I was a busboy. There was another dude that was not working hard. I find his name, but I was working way harder. Dude, when I work, you have no idea. I scramble. I've waited tables. I know all the tables. Catch up here. Yeah, no, I hear you. Catch up here. Anyway, so those are good dreams. Thank you. Thank you. Did you have fun here tonight? Wait, I still have some questions. Go ahead. I just have to pee real quick. Go pee. Okay, go pee and then come back. I'm sorry. I have to pee real quick. It's okay, good. Are you having fun though? Yeah. I'm having a great time. You guys having fun? Yeah. What a beautiful, let's clap. Let's get the energy back. Let's get the right energy field. Welcome back to the program. Welcome back. Oh, I had to do a little urinal break. I've been drinking a lot. I've been hydrating lately a lot. So let's clap for Liza again. She's getting focused back in. All right. In the program, this next section of the program is you have some questions for Liza? I do. Okay, please. I came prepared. He smells like cigarettes, not like he just peed. Did you just go smoke? Oh, Bobby, you lied. You went to go smoke. Why didn't you just say that? Yeah, why didn't you just say it? I would have let you. I mean, it's your house, so you're right. I think the problem is that you called me out. Oh. I mean. Yeah, you know what? That's a good one. That was great. Very good. True detective. True detective. She smells now. Yeah. Right? She senses. Right? She understands. She knows what's happening. Go ahead. Okay, so you were already a household name in the Philippines for a long time, right? Because you've been there since you were a kid. What was it like? I guess you didn't really start from scratch, but coming to L.A., being in Hollywood, being in this completely giant, different industry than the Philippines. Was it humbling? Was it liberating? Or was it a little bit of a trip to your ego? It's all of that combined. I think I still go through phases of it. There's moments where I'm like, I'm really happy and I enjoy the freedom that I have here. I'm able to go to the grocery store and look like shit and not have to worry about people seeing me and taking stolen photos of me and stuff like that. But then also, when it gets really quiet and you're just waiting for the next thing, you start freaking out. And I will literally go through phases where I tell Kimmy and my brother and everyone around me that like, oh, let's just go to Seafood City. Nobody knows me anymore anyway. And they'll be like, girl, you have to go at least with a hat on or dress properly. And I'm like, no, no one's going to recognize me. So people don't? No, they do. But in my head, I feel like nobody knows me anymore. Well, in the Philippines, if we went there now, you'd be a fucking. You couldn't go anywhere without being. I understand that. Yeah. Yeah. Henry Lau. I witnessed it. Oh, I know Henry Lau. I know Henry. Yeah, we're friends. Yeah, yeah. I love Henry. I did a movie with Henry. Oh, really? Yeah. And many years ago. And I did it in Asia, this movie. And kids were setting up tents. Really? Sleeping. It was a city of people just living in tents just to be witnessed back then. This was 15 years ago. Yeah, yeah. Henry Lau. A lot of fans are still like that in Asia. They're very dedicated. They're dedicated. Yeah. Wow. I've never played Asia. I've been telling you for a long time. Hawaii, but is that Asia? Mm-mm. Wait, why don't you play Asia? I don't know. Remember we were going to Beijing? We were going to Beijing? I was going to Beijing. Yeah. What happened was we were in Perth or something. No, it was Singapore. Singapore. Yeah, different. My bad. Yeah. And the next day we're about to get to fly and Andrew just goes, we've got to cancel it. We're going to get arrested. And I go, okay, you're right. Let's cancel it. Why were you? Because of just the nature. We don't know on stage. Sometimes crazy things happen. Yeah. And we can't control it. Yeah. You know, so. What do you mean crazy things happen on stage? Like. Bobby sometimes. What do you mean? What? Sorry, I don't think I've ever seen your show. Well, things fall out. Yeah. That's all I can say. Sometimes he does a little dance and things fall out. Wait. You do full like frontal nude. No, not frontal. I have in my life. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Back in the day when that was kosher. Sometimes a buttocks falls out. Yeah. Sometimes. Oh. Yeah. And the audience goes crazy. Yeah. And sometimes he gives little lap dances to volunteers. And I think the Philippines would like that, I think. I think so. I think there's an audience. I'm going to wait until my special to come out. Yeah. Right. And then let's, you know, I don't think, you know, we need to educate people that I do stand up. Yeah. It's crazy to me. Yeah. People don't know I do stand up. I didn't know that you do stand up, actually. Yeah. That's the thing. Yeah. So once that comes out, people know I do stand up. Yeah. I discovered it when I came to L.A. because I would drive by like, was it the Laugh Factory? Comedy Store. Yeah. And then I would see your name there and I would be like, oh, my gosh, because I knew you from the podcast, but I didn't know. Yeah. Did some movies, too. But anyway, I'm in the biz, too. But I'll watch. I have more questions. Sex and the City, you know, it goes on and on. Really? Oh, that's right. You were sex and the City. Like the new one? Yeah, new iteration. Yeah, there's a new iteration. Yeah. Anyway, let's move on. It's not about me. Yeah. Other questions? Okay. Yes. What did you, what do you feel like you had to unlearn about being a celebrity in the Philippines to survive in Hollywood? Can I defend her real quick? Yeah. You know. Why would you defend? I'm not. Can I? Paula, stop attacking her. Yeah. Wait. She's not attacking. No. What I just want to say, can I interject something real quick? It's that L.A.'s different than any other city. It's a beast. So when I go out, I rarely get recognized in L.A. Oh, yeah. You know, but anywhere else, it's busier. So it's like people are cooler here. Not cooler. They're more arrogant. What's the word? Standoffish. Standoffish. I think that there is a code in L.A. where. Yeah. Because it is such a celebrity town that generally speaking, you leave celebrities alone. Yeah. I've seen like Bette Midler at a Chinese restaurant. I'm not going to go up to Bette Midler's and go do that, do that, do that. I know the songs. Is that the song? But anyway, yeah, I wouldn't bother people in that way. I've sat next to like huge people. Like one time I sat next to Anthony Hopkins. That's huge. Yeah. I sat next to him and his jacket was so big it was rubbing against my skin. Right. And I remember getting like spine tingles. Hannibal Lecter spine tingles. But he was a celebrity. I would be. He was a star striker. I was like, holy fuck. Yeah. His jacket's touching my skin. But anyway. So back to the. I don't know why. I don't know why you said that. We get it. You meant Anthony Hopkins. All right. All right. That sounded weird. Anyway. Okay. Let me. I'm sorry. Give me a high five. Is it crazy that I don't know Anthony Hopkins? I don't know. Okay. The dad in the Legends of the Fall. I don't know what the. Did you see Silence of the Lambs? Silence of the Lambs. You don't know. You don't know who Hannibal Lecter is. I've heard of him. Hannibal Lecter. Because they're so young, Bobby. Oh, he's a really good actor. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Can you do me a favor, Eliza, when you go home tonight? All right. You and your little family, compact, you know what I mean? The little Asian one. All right. Kimmy. Kimmy. Kimmy. I love Kimmy. Can you do me a favor? And just tonight, watch Silence of the Lambs. I think it's just a cultural thing you have to fucking see. Okay. All right. And I keep teaching her. Jodie Foster. Really good in it. It's a great, great movie. Yeah. Okay. What did I have to unlearn? Is that? The question? Yeah. Sorry. It's okay. One thing, I don't know. One thing that I talk about a lot with my friends, actually, is that there's this unspoken, I guess, I don't know if it's just celebrity culture or a Filipino thing, where everybody's so scared of looking or seeming poor. Oh. Right? Do you know what I mean? Yeah. I remember in showbiz. We would do ASAP. ASAP is A-S-A-P as soon as possible, but it's pronounced like that. It's a variety show. It's a variety show. It's called ASAP. Yeah. It's not ASAP. It's ASAP. ASAP. I used to watch it all the time when I was a kid. Really? ASAP? Yeah. Okay. Tell me about the show. Is it good? They'd probably have you on, Bobby. Oh, yeah. They'd love to have you. It's a variety show where celebrities who aren't singers or dancers sing and dance, but we also have singers and dancers on the show. Oh, cool. Yeah. And so, what was I saying? Oh, yeah. I remember all the female actresses and all the male actresses would be grouped in separate dressing rooms, but then the girls always had something. such tight dressing rooms because we would all bring our own shoes and it was this thing of like you would see everybody like trying to show off the brands of their shoes like they would keep their designer shoes in the boxes yeah and they would bring their shoes you know like when you go to like a grocery store and they have like those like wagon thingies for like heavy packages yeah yeah they would no i don't know what is it like 50 to 100 of those things okay wow with like i mean they would bring like one of those with like 50 to 100 pairs of shoes no yes just to like show off like a certain do you have high brand shoes i mean during the time i would also do that because like my stylists and makeup artists would be like you should buy this and you should buy that because look they have this and they have that like there was like a culture of that i think it's equally annoying i know what you're saying like you know when i have like family members like visit and immediately they'll be like let's go buy like some branded things and i'm like it's so let's not and the thing is they don't even want the branded thing for themselves it's to show other people yeah that they have the branded thing so gross it's like i don't do i don't do brands not always but sometimes you do one time he bought a two thousand dollars ski mask from where so funny though yeah what was it from oh rick rubin rick owens rick owens rick owens i love rick owens um yeah um but yeah that's so glenciaga shoes i have some shoes and oh yeah well he's doing he's he's the guy yeah yeah okay i have a couple more questions and um you want to go two hours on this no i mean this is like an hour this is the longest that we've ever been i have to ask i mean she's a great guest but we can go on i have to ask because i feel as though this has been one of my um my bigger frustrations with uh filipino entertainment in general because remember i grew up there jules grew up there um so growing growing up in the philippines i'm sure you remember this jules how lighter skin is so glorified you know skin lightening products are all over the shelves there um same with sharper noses higher nose bridge just eurocentric features right um do you think that filipino media is genuinely trying to move away from those standards or have they just gotten better at pretending they are oh you know i want to say that there's a genuine conscious effort to do that and i think there are people that are like you know they are genuinely like educating themselves on it and are advocating for it but i think there are a lot of people that are just you know they see it online they see like western media talking about it and they're like kind of hopping on the bandwagon because you know that's what's hot over here but i don't think they really understand what it means and the actual damage that you know the entertainment industry has caused on a lot of young filipino girls when it comes to their their physical bodies and everything but there's like i know a lot of actors and actresses like um nadine lustre for example or um there's other actors too that i know that they put it in their contracts that they don't want to do whitening stuff anymore i love that that it's like they will only do moisturizing like they they can never use like i so i'm not proud of it but i my first ever like skincare endorsement it was like a whitening product and i was like 16 17 at the time and obviously i come from a poor background and so when i was like 16 i was like i'm not going to do it i'm not going to do it whatever brands come to me at the time it was like just grab grab grab and that was also the mentality of my manager right but when the as soon as the commercial came out i saw myself i'm i'm light skin right but like i also can get really tan and during that time i know i was really tan because i was always scuba diving and stuff they whitened me for that commercial post in post and for the first time i actually felt offended because i was like oh i wasn't good enough for you the way i was and i was like oh i'm not good enough for you the way i was and i was like oh i was so i was like what more the other people that already like you know they get made fun of for their skin color like what what do they feel when they see this this type of stuff happening online and in the entertainment industry so i after that i was like i banned that from my my like list of requirements when it comes to um endorsements i don't know can i just be honest as a male if i may i don't represent all males yeah you know i mean but i'm a really good sample of a male don't you think like a good sample test of a male how many times are you gonna say male hey put it in two more times i will i'm gonna can i integrate male into the more time yeah i will um but when i you know look at a a woman who's like i understand that that's a beautiful as a male i understand um that that you know like i i look through my male eyes yeah yeah and my male energy right like you know like kind of ferocious but you know i mean but also kind if you you know what i mean it's to keep your distance you know i don't know what i'm talking about but my point is is that i've never saw like the pale skin and went oh that's beautiful i've always liked tanner women yeah but you also have like my girlfriend right now is white right yeah and i go i go stay out in the sun you should have her get skin cancer just because yeah i don't care stay out in the sun because i can't do the pale you know because i'm i'm not in underworld yeah i'm not in the movie underworld right i'm not fighting wolves and fighting wolves i'm not fighting wolves i'm not like werewolves and fucking lichens and fucking vampires and stuff right it's just different in the philippines and it's not even the filipinos fault right it's india has the same problem yeah but if you think about just historically what's happened um also like yeah korea the worst the whitening lotion oh my gosh colorism is crazy in asia but then you also have to consider the fact that like you know we when we were colonized by spain we were made to believe that our brown skin was lesser than and so that is very much kind of like there's an indoctrination there of self-loathing that maybe we're not even awake some people are not awake to yet but it's like even jules when she was younger she wanted to have her lips reduced yeah and what no yeah you have gorgeous lips no and then my skin they would bully me my nickname was capri yeah because i just look like bobby don't laugh you know they had shows it's crazy in the philippines i can't even say it but they had a show called nita do you know that show i think yeah i can't say that word that was a tv show for kids that's insane it was about a little girl who had such dark skin and she had like really curly hair because it's basically about like the indigenous filipino people and then the whole show they're making fun of her for her skin color yeah i love them the indigenous part of it you know yeah that's where the mythology comes from you think white blood did that i know they can't fantasize like we can but i think this is why i love forgotten island i honestly cried like six separate times because there is so much of it when i think about movies or attempts to make movies um about filipinos they're never for filipinos when i watch forgotten island i'm like oh this is a movie about the philippines obviously for the larger masses as well but this is like such a sweet like it's a movie for filipinos when i watch it there were so many little we're talking about forgotten island yeah yeah we've moved past that no we haven't we haven't moved on all right watch forgotten island movie theaters near you can i just have i have a little little thing yeah go ahead go ahead um you know that's a mermaid that's not a siren oh yeah ours is like a ours is a siren they sing beautifully yeah but okay but isn't it like a is it like a shokoi there's also shokoi that's different oh they're like they're like fishmen the merman the merman not even a merman like they their faces look like they're part of a fish yeah so you have lawn gnomes is that what a duende is one day yeah yeah it's a lawn moan they're very cute a lawn gnome they kind of kind of landed yeah i kind of say it again lawn gnome lawn not lawn gnome no no it's a hard thing to say yeah yeah what did we learn today let's see we learned a lot that the philippines has cooler mythological creatures they do have cooler you know i have to admit that yeah i don't know in a battle i don't know alex did you see the both what do you think did i what do you see the other mythological korean one oh because the korean one just looks like animals it's a lot of pokemon yeah what a rabbit like ours look better though dragons and stuff we got dragons and stuff we have just regular degular animals oh you have it yeah you have a minnewaka anyway um maybe there's like no creativity i feel like i mean this is the best one though which is also in forgotten island which is also very scary for kids to watch it was it was genuinely scary that's insane well um how about a round of applause Yeah, it do, it do