Life’s Been Life-ing: Permission to Pause Without Guilt

Hello, hello, and welcome to the Inspiring ECE Podcast. Wow, this has felt like forever since I have pushed record. If you might have forgotten, I'm Marcinical, and I am the host of this wonderful podcast, and I know it's been a while, but I'm back, my friends, and I'm back. So many of you reached out and said, where have you been? Are you okay? Is everything all right? The amount of touching messages were phenomenal, but I'm going to be honest, and I'm going to be very transparent in today's episode. Life has been life-ing, and I've had to take a pause. You name it in my life lately, it has been an absolute rollercoaster. Messy, beautiful, unpredictable, let's just say, real life showed up, and I've had to take a few weeks to hit pause. I know I miss you all too, and I hope you've missed me, but I'm coming back, rejuvenated, strong, and ready for all the things early childhood education. So in this episode, it's just going to be a real talk. We're going to talk about what's happened with me over the last few weeks. I have felt guilt, I have felt like I wasn't showing up for all of you, and myself, and my community, but I just wanted to stop and pause and say thank you again. Your messages definitely were the reason I said enough is enough. I started to work on me. So sometimes as entrepreneurs, as educators, parents, we get so caught up that we forget to be present, and that happened to me. I was so busy in my business and my work that I forgot to be present with all the other things in my life that brought me joy, until my body told me enough. Well, I just wanted to share my overflowing gratitude for all of you wonderful individuals that reached out and checked in on me. And today's episode is all about that. It's all about what happens when life starts life and how we need to let go of the guilt when we have to hit pause. So grab your favorite drink, put me in your ears, and hit play as we get in to today's episode. Welcome to the Inspiring ECE Podcast, the show where we talk all things early childhood education. Here, we blend practical advice with uplifting tales to fuel your passion and purpose in the realm of ECE. I'm your host, Marcin Nicole, and after 20 years as an early childhood educator, Malteacher, I am all too familiar with the highs and lows of this career path. I'm here to support you on your ECE journey, whether you're new or experienced, I've got your back. Let's embark on this journey together, transforming our classrooms and touching hearts. Let's get into today's episode. All right, so let's talk about it. Let's talk about why it's okay to hit pause, and I'm here to tell you exactly why I needed a break, but most of all, while it's okay for you to take a break if you need it. As individuals, as powerful, motivating, and inspiring people, as most of us are as educators, entrepreneurs, parents, employees, we get stretched so thin. Sometimes we don't even notice the signs that our body is telling us. When we go through the first couple of sleepless nights, we just tell ourselves, "We'll get through it," or when parts of our body aches and we're like, "That's okay, it will get better in a few days. We ignore the signs to continue to push through." Until it tells you absolutely not. A few weeks ago, I was just exhausted. Burning candles on both ends. Doing all the mom things, doing all the entrepreneur things, there was no more to give. And until my body said, "Full stop, I had to stop, I had to pause." The chronic headaches were no longer going away. The back pain was no longer just a symptom, but now in everyday occurrence. And now it was time to see the doctor. It only took me a few weeks to get through the doctor. So educators, we're going to pin my story for a second, but I want you to hear this. If something in your body doesn't feel right, don't wait. Make the appointment and ask questions. Your body is telling you something. Now, back to my story. You literally told me I was doing too much, and I had way too much stress, and I need to relax. Excuse me, doctor. Do you understand that I'm trying to run a business? I am a mother of three. There is things that need to get done. What do you mean? Rest. How do I do that exactly? He suggested that I unplug. Pardon? What do you mean? I needed to step back. I needed to go and get physical, move my body, do some mental stimulation. He had a great conversation about all the things that were causing me stress. But yes, some of them I put on myself, but some of them, not so much. So reluctantly, I did what he asked. I literally unplugged for over two weeks, where I got up every day and I went for walks. Or I spent time with my kids. Or I colored. I got a lovely adult coloring book. It was brilliant. Anyway, I digress. And I just focused on being present. I decluttered my house, I worked on things that weren't work-related. And I will tell you in the first few days, I was hesitant on doing those things because my brain was telling me you have this to do, you have emails to check, you have all these things. And I really had to focus on the disconnecting piece. You're allowed to take breaks. I literally wrote that on my mirror every single day just to remind myself I'm allowed to take breaks. After that sank in, I added without guilt. Everything came crashing down around me at once. And yes, I had strategies in place. But I didn't realize they weren't for the big stuff. They were for the little things like getting through my to-do list. But I had to stop and make room for the physical, mental, and emotional part. And those systems were what I need to work on over the next few weeks. That's why I worked on my mindset. And especially my community was super, super key. I literally had to embrace the pause. That's what I want to tell you. Number one, the first thing I did, I embraced the pause. Once I started seeing that message every day, it's okay to take a pause without guilt. That was the positivity piece. That was the movement piece for me. I was able to let go of the guilt and really take in what the pause was trying to teach me. Was trying to rebuild in my body. The second thing I did after my first week, I started to lean on my community. I reached out to those wonderful, wonderful colleagues, friends and family that support me. That built me up. They helped rebuild me with not just positive affirmations, but with clarity. And with strength and endurance, trust me, educators, you need them. They become a pivotal point of who you are. That community is everything. And another thing I needed to wrap my mind around was this. Stop trying to outweigh the struggle. Stop trying to rush through it and get to the other side. Let the tough moments run their course. I know, all of you just quenched. Rolled your eyes at me. I know, but that's where the learning and growth happens. That's when you allow yourself to be in those emotions and realize how much resilience you really do have. If you rush, you miss that healing part. And you, most of all, you miss the lesson you're supposed to be learning in those moments. I know. You're probably thinking you're supposed to be the encouraging one and I am encouraging you. To understand that life is going to happen no matter where you are in your journey. And life happens to us all. It just looks different for everyone, but your journey is yours and your ability to rebuild, to stay strong and to say, guess what, this time it won't take me out is what matters most. Now, let's be real. I had a little bit of a health scare, which woke me up, but also I have my oldest going off to college in a different country, and I never thought for a second how that was going to affect me emotionally and physically, that my home life is now going to be changed. My dynamic is going to be changed. I also have another child that is struggling emotionally, socially, and I was neglecting that by being selfish, by diving into my work so I could avoid dealing with that. Life is going to happen. Life is going to come at you, but it doesn't have to define you. It is only a season that you're in, but I want you to be prepared for it. This episode is all about life's going to get at us, but we're going to be prepared to deal with it. And here is the reflection and the hard truths. I'm going to be truly, truly honest. There were moments when I sent DMs and voice notes to my community, to my friends, to my families all hours. I was trying to hold on to make sure that I was doing the right thing, and my community, they responded. But they didn't just say what I wanted to hear. They gave me hard truths. They told me what I needed to hear, pleasant or not, but I accepted it. I didn't let it take an emotional toll where, how dare they say that to me. My perception was, thank you for saying that to me. Thank you for sharing your perspectives with me. They all told me, hit a pause in your business. They reminded me to spend time with my children first. They pointed out that if I'd canceled on my obligations, it's okay. People are there to understand. In those moments, I was like, no, I can't cancel business meetings and all the things I have coming up, they're not going to think I'm professional. If I cancel, my community told me if they are your people and they want to work with you, they will understand, boy, was that hard to hear. That was super, super hard to hear. But those reflections were what motivated me and inspired me to push record this week. They reminded me that the people who truly care about you are the people that encourage you to continue. So educators hear this, if you need time, take it. You will come back bigger, stronger, more resilient after you've taken the break. Your healing matters more than your to-do list ever will. And guess what? That's why I'm here now, letting this episode flow, as it might. It might be all over the place, it might feel a little messy, but I'm here. And I'm sharing my heart with all of you. So before I wrap up, because I felt like I went on a rant today, I want you to think about this. When life starts life-ing, push pause, be in the moment, do not rush through the hard stuff and learn from it. And most of all, you are rock star, okay? And if you do not have a rock star community behind you, find one. All that to be said, I'm healthy, I'm happy, and I'm returning to all of you. So round yourself with people who inspire you, motivate you, rebuild you, and give you those real truths. I'm here for you, I can be that person, send me a DM, send me an email, I'm here for you. I want to say, I'm back, I'm happy, and I'm rejuvenated, and I'm here. And I'm ready for the rest of this season, and we're going to dive into real conversations around early childhood education, we're going to tackle challenges, we're going to celebrate those successes, we're going to do everything together. I wanted to thank you so much for listening, for all of you that reached out, for being the heart of this beautiful community. We are going to keep building, growing, and inspiring each other together. So thank you for joining me. I'm so grateful to be back. And until next time, keep inspiring. Thank you for listening to the Inspiring ECE Podcast. I'm hoping you're walking away with gold nuggets to take into your classroom this week. Also remember, on your hardest days in the classroom, and we know they happen, I'm in your corner, and I'm cheering you on. Keep doing what you're doing, you're making a difference in the lives of the children and their families. I absolutely love connecting with this incredible community of ECEs through this podcast. If you have a story you'd like to share on the show, or a topic you'd like for me to discuss, please send me a message. You can DM me on Instagram, @iSpireToEducate, or send me an email at [email protected], but most of all, subscribe to the Inspiring ECE Podcast on Apple, Spotify, or wherever you listen to your podcast. And until next time, keep inspiring.