Let's talk about.. oral

Okay friends, a couple of weeks ago I announced this podcast series. About a week ago I recorded the introduction and today we are going to talk about sex baby. I do want to remind you that this is an 18 and over podcast so if you're not 18 you should probably exit now. Also if you are easily offended you may not want to listen because I'm going to get into some pretty intimate details. This has not been done before to my knowledge. There's a few videos about it on YouTube but nobody really gets down to the nitty gritty and I'm about to get real nitty gritty with you all. You see I am very open and honest about who I am my journey and all of the other things that come with being a human and one of those things is sex. I have always been very comfortable with my body, with my sex life and all things bedroom related. A little backstory I did lose my virginity at a younger than normal age. I was 15 years old and yeah I was with the same guy all through high school and that really gave me the opportunity to come into myself and figure out what I liked and how I liked it and so being sexual and intimate has always been something for me that I'm very just comfortable with. I believe that sex and intimacy is important and a huge part of our lives and nobody ever wants to talk about it because it's so taboo but we're breaking that wall down right now right here today. So I gave you the backstory on when I lost my virginity and how comfortable I am because I feel it's a very important aspect of my story when it comes to my dentures and intimacy. Being a confident, secure female in the bedroom changed the second I got my teeth pulled. Even having bad rotting teeth I was still relatively confident and comfortable. I've been with my husband since 2016 and we have a pretty open communication when it comes to sex and intimacy. For instance we can joke and laugh and cut up while we're being intimate and that's a beautiful thing but it takes a certain level of comfort to be able to do that and a certain level of security and confidence and in this point in the podcast I'm going to say I'm about to start talking about my sex life in a decently detailed manner so if you don't want to hear about that you can go on that is fine you do not have to listen this is for people that are interested in hearing my story and how I struggled to begin with in my denture journey. So I'm going to tell you about my sex life before dentures right after and today and the reason I'm doing this is because not many people talk about it and this is something that I wanted information on. I am married I'm in my young 30s early 30s I mean and I'm in my prime right now like this was a concern for me and I know that it's a concern for a lot of other people coming into this journey or a lot of other people that have dentures and are still not confident about it and I want to help you. I will also state that my husband is a very reserved individual. I'm going to bring him on to talk about this as well in the next episode however today this is just me because this is stuff that he's not comfortable sharing or talking about. That doesn't mean that he's not confident or anything like that it just means that he has the belief that what goes on in a bedroom should stay between couples and I have that agreement to a certain degree however in this instance I feel like it's important to share. So without going into too many details I can just tell you like a couple of stories to give you an idea of what our sex life is like. When I say we are comfortable with each other I mean we are comfortable with each other. For instance just one example I was going to perform oral sex on my husband and I looked up and I was like to do motherfucker and flipped the blankets over my head we laughed it was all funny and then it was right back down to business that's the level of comfort we have we're able to joke and laugh and just be ourselves and be goofy and have fun and feel good but that changed really fast when I got my teeth pulled and I think that that's something that a lot of people don't think about because a lot of people don't have sex at the forefront of their brain like I do. I just I do and that's okay that I do and it's okay if you don't but it is going to be something that you're going to have to learn and adjust to and get comfortable with. So when I first got my teeth pulled I felt so disgusting like I didn't want my husband to look at me and clothe the let alone naked and something that really took its toll on me was our intimacy level dropped drastically. I lost that confidence and in the beginning I wasn't open and honest with him about it because I was ashamed. For the first time ever in my life I could not openly discuss my emotions and feelings with my husband about how I was feeling and what I wanted and what I didn't want and what I was comfortable doing. There's this level of shame and embarrassment and it was miserable. Looking back now I wish I would have opened my mouth a little bit sooner, pun intended and just been upfront and honest about it because I feel like we've grown as a couple since I got my dentures and I opened up about it that is. So the first time I refused to take my dentures out the first time we had sex after I've got them I wanted them in but then the problem arose is I didn't know what if they fell out. What if they fell out during sex that would be embarrassing which is crazy for me because I'm not embarrassed easily at all. So having those thoughts running through my head distracted me the entire time I was just worried that my teeth were going to fall out while we were having sex and it was going to be so gross and unattractive and he was going to think less of me and it took away from it and it was the most miserable sex I've ever had because all I could think about was my teeth falling out. So I just avoided it. We just didn't have sex and just forget the fact of oral sex that was not even in any vision sites for me. I couldn't even think about it. I didn't want to. How is it going to be? Is it still going to feel good to him? Am I still going to be good at it? Is he going to like it? Do I do it with my teeth in? Do I do it with my teeth out? Do I leave them in and then take them out and then put them back in? I don't know what to do here and no one can give me direction or tell me or help me figure this out. So I was alone. I was alone inside my head worrying about me getting dentures ruining my sex life and in turn ruining my marriage. Which let's be real. Our marriage is not centered on our sex life at all and no one should be. That's just an aspect of a marriage but it was in the forefront of my brain every day. I was so worried that I was going to ruin our marriage and here I was so happy that I could finally smile. But at the same time I was so scared that I was going to lose everything because I got my smile. Now in saying that I got my dentures the Monday before Thanksgiving in November. I believe it was the 24th of November of 2020 and I did not have sex with my husband until January of 2020 which was a little odd for us to go that long without having sex and I did not perform oral sex on my husband until February mid-February which was excessively long because normally almost every time we have sex we perform oral sex as part of our sex. That's just a part of our intimacy and what we're comfortable with and what we enjoy and it didn't happen. He'd asked me a couple of times and I just told him I'm not ready. I'm not ready. I'm not ready. I can't do it and left it at that and didn't really voice my concerns. So I can only imagine what he was feeling and thinking at the time which we'll talk to him about that whenever he comes on the podcast. But the first time I did I finally you know felt free. So what happened was I actually just finally told him one day. I was like I'm really scared. What if you don't like it anymore? What if it doesn't feel good? And it took a lot of balls for me to to man up and woman up and say that like I was so scared to even bring these concerns to him which was so silly thinking about it. If I could go back in time I probably would have just told him immediately like I don't I'm concerned that this is going to ruin our sex life. But we discussed it and he reassured me and he was like I really don't care if you have teeth or not. Either way it's going to feel fucking amazing to have my penis in your mouth. So just hearing him say that and vocalize that gave me the confidence I needed and the first time I tried it with my teeth in. But let me tell you what I have a small mouth. And having this plastic and a penis in my mouth was a lot of uncomfortable. So I just took them out. and set them on the bed right beside me and went to town and guess what? Ladies, he didn't know the difference. I mean he might have, but he didn't tell me. He didn't say anything about it and a lot of that's going to come from when we talked to him on what his feelings and emotions and sensations were, but for me it was liberating. I don't wear adhesive, so it was easier for me to just pop them out and then pop them back in before I pop back up. But it happened and it was great and I felt great afterwards. Like I did that. The confidence boost was absolutely amazing and now I just don't care. I go to bed without my teeth and every night and we have sex without my teeth and every time we have sex pretty much. Unless it's just like a random spur of the moment thing and I don't take my teeth out or I've just installed cushion grip. So I just jumped right in on this and yeah I think I'm gonna stop it here. There's obviously so much more to talk about, but I'm gonna wait until Sam's here and we can really dive into that. This is just my view and my journey with it and it's not even all of my feelings and the whole conversation. It's just what I can fit into a relatively short podcast. So there's that and until next time.