Let's Give It a Taste: Thursday, October 29th, 2026

♪ Good morning girlies, it's the Toast. It's Jackson, Claude, and we're your hosts. It's your favorite show, the fast five things you need to know. We'll start your day off swirly, it's the Toast. I sound amazing. Welcome back to the Toast and happy Thursday. Hope everybody's having a great day. Today's kind of like GMA at the Toast, Good Morning Millennials America, because we have a guest and he's actually joining us at the top of the show. We would never make accommodations like this for literally anyone. Imagine if somebody said, hey, I have a project I'm launching. Can I come announce it at the top of the Toast? We'd be like, no. Well, unfortunately, we couldn't say no to today's guest. It's Ben Soffer. Oh, am I here? You're here. Oh, I'm not. Welcome, Ben. Wow, that was a jump scare. I almost just, we're going to make them wait for the project. Welcome. Everyone knows that you are here to announce something. Have you been following the drama? I have been following the drama. About the Boy Who Cried announcement? I have not been following the drama about the Boy Who Cried announcement. We've been hyping up your announcement all week. Obviously, like, we're proud of you and we're really excited. Proud wife, proud sister-in-law. And soon-to-be wife. And we were hyping it up and a lot of people in the comments, like, we're not getting hyped because they're like, it's probably another split flavor. Ben, like, loves to be like, big announcement, big announcement. And it's like a new video of you and Jared Freed. Oh, my God. Yeah, you're the Boy Who Cried announcement. Oh, God. So people, and we had to then be like, no, guys, it's really, that's what I'm always telling you. Like, you have to be a little bit more. So we were like, no, guys, it's really a big announcement. Yeah, we told them it's not a split flavor. It's so real. It's so big. And not that there's anything wrong with a split flavor, of course. No. We said that, too. No, it's, you're right. You can't have too many moments and they all be special. But today's moment. But this is a really special moment. And it's unbelievable that I didn't tell anyone. I feel like it's so me. Over the last, like, five years. You've literally told every person we've ever met. I've never told, they don't know. No, not the public, but like, in your personal life. Sure. Where at the dinner, you meet someone, I'm actually, you've told literally. That's fine. Okay, okay, sure. I didn't know what you were saying. It didn't make its way to the interwebs. Nobody knows. No, it was a good kept secret. It was a good kept secret. That's what I meant. What is this? You have pain in the ass. So speaking of the secret, speaking of the announcement, would you like to share? Should we say what it is? Now? Yeah, let's do it. They've waited long enough. Today, you can order my debut cookbook, Let's Give It a Taste, where we're making mealtime a moment. We're going to put a link somewhere, right? Of course. Okay, and otherwise, just like Google, Ben's Hopper, Let's Give It a Taste, it's everywhere. It's Target. It's Amazon. It's Barnes & Noble. It's Strand. It's Amazon. Okay, independent bookstore. We want those first. Support local. If you're going to order, honestly, try Barnes & Noble first. And if there's some, maybe there's a shipping issue, then you can go to Amazon. Just buy the book. Whatever. It counts. Wherever you like to buy books. Congratulations, Ben. This is crazy. Yay! Thank you. It is such an amazing book, and you guys honestly had to endure a lot of it. Yes, Jackie and I both are editors on the project. We worked on the recipes. Jackie worked a lot on the intro story, the foreword. The foreword. This book is a real labor of love for the whole family. It's got a lot of our family recipes in it. We've also eaten all of the food. We can enforce every recipe. I can say, I actually, I don't want to be dishonest. I haven't tried. I haven't tried all the food. He makes his own lox, gravlox. You guys ever heard of that? I did not try the gravlox. And Ben specifies in each recipe, he's like, which ones I eat, which ones I don't like. The pancakes, of course. The family favorites are in there. The chicken rocks, Ben's chili. Cassoulet's in there. But there's also, what I like about the book, and I feel like I want people to know, is like, you're kind of like, I always say this, you're kind of like a 50s housewife. Like, I come home to like a dinner most nights. Correct. And that's really what this book is, like for people who don't know how to make dinner or don't know like what to make for dinner. It's like an existential crisis of being like, I have to make dinner for my family every single night for the rest of my life. Where do I start? This is really like a great option for that. And I think a lot of the moms who listen will love that about it. Of course, you go into like your whole deli meats. You're literally making your own lox at home, curing your own salmon. So it's a real reflection of your interests. But I love like the amount of dinners in there. Yeah, there's a lot of dinners. It's really not just sandwiches. Like I could have originally was like, oh, let's just make like 100 different varieties of tuna salad because I could have made a book like that. But no, this is, it runs. The gamut we have from breakfast through dessert and the idea, which is why the tagline is making mealtime a moment is as you guys know, you're always like, oh, let's just like throw something on a table. And I am typically like, let's make something nicer. Why are you throwing us under the bus? Because it's fucking true. I've never said that in my whole life. We're all aligned. I want to make mealtime a moment. Okay, contrarians. Literally contrarians. We're not the enemy. You're contrarians. Yeah, by the way, just to make the point of your book, you don't have to throw us under the bus. Like we agree we should make mealtime a moment. That's a great tagline. Really? We don't disagree with it. It's like a family value. By the way, actually, you know what? You want to make mealtime a moment. Oh, wow. You want to make mealtime paper and plastic. I work, I literally slave over a fucking stove. And you're like, oh, why don't we serve the brisket with plastic forks? Because I fucking worked for like eight hours. What are you talking about? It is my belief that if someone cooked a home cooked meal, we cannot eat it on paper with plastic. No, we have to use. I just want to say Ben is exaggerating. I completely agree. Okay. I completely agree. Like, especially. We're making mealtime a moment. We could use the real wedding cutlery. But you do a little too much sometimes. That's all I'll say. By the way, you should be topping your nightly dinner with a little bit of parsley, a little garnish. Make it look pretty. If it looks pretty, people are going to want to eat it. So what are your inspirations for this book? Like which of your fellow cooks? Well, first and foremost, my dad. My dad is a caterer. And I grew up around that. My mom is a florist. Many people don't know that. But I come from a family of hosts. And so, yeah, they are my first inspirations. But beyond that, it's just like us. It's like we have these family trips where I cook a lot. I cook almost every night. And it's fun. And I love it. And I get to experiment and mess around. And sometimes a dish sticks, like a lemon garlic parsley chicken that we love. And sometimes I'll just try things for myself. And I won't give it to you guys, for example, like a Moroccan scratch burger. Sometimes it's a bit of a quibblash joke for the end of time. Totally. Let's talk about the cover. You look so handsome. Thank you. Tell us a little bit about. We shot it in the Hamptons. We had to. Always my inspiration is Ina Garten. I love her. Of course. She's amazing. Like if I wasn't married to her, to you. I wasn't married to her. If you weren't married to me, she would still be married to Jeffrey. So good luck. Yeah, but like maybe I could weasel my way into a throuple. I don't think so. Throuple, they totally get down. Oh, definitely. Throuple, yeah. They do. And do you want to talk about Quentin? Yeah. So I love Ina so much that I literally hired her. I'm her photographer. Quentin Bacon, the Quentin Bacon, shot this book. And he shoots Ina's book. And when you order this book and when you receive this book, you're going to look at this book and you're going to say, wow, Ben spent a lot of money. And the answer is yes. I spent all of my money on Quentin. And I mean, the photos speak for themselves. They are amazing. It was like being in the same room as Gilles Ben Simon. Like really. It was like Ben was like, I of course went to set. She shook the hand of the Quentin Bacon. Not to make everything about me. Me and Phil both went to set. And it was very. It was kind of. He's Australian. He looks just like. Who did he say his celebrity crush? He kind of looks like Bruce. Your dad? Yeah. No, he doesn't. No, he looks like Paul McCartney. He looks exactly like Paul McCartney. He's Australian. He really doesn't look like my dad. No, not at all. Because would you say your dad looks like Paul McCartney? No. Not even a little. No, no. Maybe if my dad. No, because he's lost a lot of weight. I don't think he could possibly look like Paul McCartney. No, but it was like being in the presence. Ben had like really hyped him up. Like Quentin Bacon, Quentin Bacon. And then lo and behold, I was reading on his cookbook and Quentin was all over it. I mean, it was a get. Like we went through and the number one choice was Quentin. Is Quentin going to work with a first time book author like me? Novice author. And it got sold to him by the great people. I should say this is published. Simon Schuster, Gallery, Molly. She is amazing. Molly Gregory, shout out. And then Sarah Pasik, my book agent. She's the reason Fork of July even exists. Oh. She is. That's who I need to talk to. She literally, she's like, if you want to be taken seriously, you need to cook every single day. And that was the first one. I could kill her. And then Jackie. I could kill her. I believe you helped me come up with the title Fork of July. You actually, Jackie came up with the title Let's Give It a Taste. We were coming up with. That makes sense too. Jackie is fantastic at that. Well, this was a long time. And like over a year ago, I was like, whatever your title is going to be, like we need to like see it even more now. And you were already, let's give it a taste. Yeah. So that was, obviously I would have liked like. Delicious with lish. That's what I would have liked. Not putting the lish in de-lish. That's what we almost. What was the book called before Jackie said, let's give it a taste? I actually have, I screenshotted it. Oh, this is fun. The first version of the book, because I was obsessed with Ben Soffer, Celebrity, all this stuff. Like it was. Oh, Celebrity Cooks or something, right? Cook Like a Celebrity was the original name of the book. I'm so glad we didn't do that. This is so much better. It also just doesn't make any sense. Like it's, it's funny for like the inside joke of what BSC is, but like if somebody goes and picks up a book, Cook Like a Celebrity, they're expecting to see like Brad Pitt, his recipe, like a book of celebrity recipes. Or a celebrity chef. Yeah. Also celebrities don't cook. It was way too deep. It was way too deep kind of a joke. I don't want to cook like a celebrity. No, not at all. I'm pretty sure they don't cook. They don't cook. Yeah. They don't know how to cook. Right. Yeah. No, the name is great. The book is gorgeous. We're so proud of it. We're so proud of you. Thank you. Thank you. You can pre-order Let's Give It a Taste. Do you ever want to call it Fork of July? No, because that also is too niche, but we should come out with like a summer book. Like a summer pamphlet or something. I was also really pushing for like calling it Fork of July. like something to do with fork. You were, yeah, yeah, fork of life. Fork of life. You were. You know. Which I'm also happy we didn't go with. I pushed really hard for fork. Fork of life. Yeah. I'm obviously not here to start stuff, but I did want to point out, I don't know if you know this, Jackie, that sourdough recipe is in the book. Which one? Your sourdough recipe is in the book. How'd you get it? Actually, no, not your sourdough recipe. No, not your sourdough. Using your starter. Great. Like you're credited in it. What do you mean starting stuff? She should be so happy. And you don't even let her have her nice moment. She would have loved it. You probably wanted to tell me. It was so sweet. You probably wanted to tell me as like a gift to me, like as a surprise. No, I literally always say this to Claudia. She would be the greatest YouTuber because all she is is clickbait. She's a drama gal. It's literally like Ben stole. My husband stole my sister's recipe. Click for details. And then literally you go in and it's like I love my sister's bread so much that I decided to make it. Yeah, there's literally three pages on how to make sourdough. That is certainly in there. I love that. Step by step, so labor intensive. There's also probably my favorite chapter is how to make an Italian bread basket at home where you go to like a Carbone and you have a garlic bread, a tomato bread, these multiple breads. And I show you how to make that with some store-bought bread because that makes it a little bit easier. Because store-bought is fine. What are your thoughts on your take on store-bought? Oh, he actually has a thing at the beginning of the book where he gives like a kind of like a list of ingredients and also tools that he recommends. Being like you need the expensive knives but you don't need the expensive like cutting boards, whatever. He gives his recommendations. And then for like condiments and stuff, he also is like I prefer this brand whenever I'm talking in the book about like hot sauce or mayo. Just know I'm talking about Hellmann's. And what was the question you asked? You were talking about not making something at home and I would never make. And then he gives a like, he will say like please use store-bought. Like don't bother. With mayonnaise. Like don't bother making at home though. Of course. There are a few things that you don't. A few things, no, that I don't. But I think bread, it depends. Like if you want a great sourdough, you can go to a bakery and get a great sourdough. Would I get the sourdough at your local grocery store? Probably not because it's not real. But like if you went to Bread's and got a sourdough, I'm sure it's made great. A bakery. But you do make amazing sourdough. Thank you. So I would just like go to you. Go to your house. Go to your local and. Well, we're like special. We don't like have to go to local bakeries because we have one in the family. We don't. Yeah. Even though like it's such a labor of love, I would never ask you to make me a loaf. Really? Ask me all the time. It's a process. I'm literally like netting like four loaves a week now. Are we not supposed to be asking? It's just a process. And also for food. Like I'm so happy to make it for you guys. Please ask. I do. That's like a compliment. Okay. So we. We would love one. We would love one. We would love them weekly. Coming right up. Two a week. Okay. I'll put you down for one. We'll pick it up too. You don't have to deliver it. Two a week. I'll put you down for two a week. I will pick it up. You don't have to schedule a delivery. Because I've been like giving them away. You know, I've been giving them to neighbors. I know. Our friend just had a baby and she's like been, all she's craving is sourdough. So I'm like making her a loaf a week. But I can put you on that list. Sounds like you're helping people make mealtime a moment. You are. I would say that. You make mealtime a moment. Because I'm inspired by my brother-in-law. Who often makes mealtime. Not us making this about us. Yeah. I mean, it's really like a family. It is. There's so much of your parents in this book. There's so much of us in this book. There is. You're sort of an amalgamation of all the beautiful women around you. Yeah. It's an amazing book that I really am very proud of. We're proud of you. I hope that you pre-order it. Pre-order. It comes out June 1st. Pops is a first-time author. So pre-order numbers will really mean a lot to his publisher and maybe get him on some lists. As a first-time author, we should be supporting men in the culinary art. And then also when you pre-order it, and especially with a cookbook, you get the hard copy that day. And if you order it once it comes out. So it will be on your doorstep before anyone else. You're going to want to pre-order it. Oh. I'm also going to have your email and we are going to send you some really, really great stuff. I can't tell you what yet, but there's like pre-order incentives. Like if you order early, you are put on a list where there's some fun stuff headed your way. Sounds very threatening. Okay. Totally. Can we redo that? Yeah. We're putting you on a list. I'm scared. No, like it's a fun list. What? Like giveaways and things like that? Is that what you mean? Okay. Yeah, cool. Can we do that again? No, no. It was funny. Leave it, leave it. You sure? Yeah, I'm positive. Okay, cool. Everyone was cracking up. So we're leaving it in. But yeah, no, like pre-order incentives. Like it's fun. I'll be on the list. Yeah. Of course. Like our ancestors. Like our ancestors. I wanted to ask you a question. I've been meaning to ask you this. Why did you write Ben Soffer, not Benjamin Soffer? Did it ever occur to you to use your government name? It didn't. And I think it just would have been too long. I know when you look at like the spine. A lot of people use the spines for like decor. And yeah, your name like wouldn't have fit. It's a gorgeous, you know, the spine matches my house. The spine does match your house. It passes. The green check. Oh, by the way. You can add it to. That's the green. That's the green of my house. No, no, no. That's the green. Oh, that's the green. The green. The green? The green. The green. Am I supposed to know what we're talking about? Yeah. Like our chat yesterday? Yeah, from me. Oh, we were talking, we were discussing colors. From like the other secret program? Yeah, right. We were discussing shades of green. Green. That's the green. That's the green. My golly, we've got it. Wow. That's not the green. This is not the green. No, no, no. That's the green. That's the green. Yeah. Wow. Like your stage name is Ben Soffer. Back to the. Of course. I was just wondering, like what did you do? You did Jackie. Jackie. That's my stage name. Next time I write a book, like I'm literally signing a Turtie Lou Freebridge. People don't even know me by my name anymore. It's true. And I'm okay with that. Turtie Lou. I'm so proud of you, Pops. You've worked so hard. Thank you both for letting me come on. Of course. By the way, there was no show that I would have. I didn't even do this on my own show. Sure. He couldn't get booked on like GMA, so he came here. No, really. No, I'm kidding. Really. Really. Thank you. Of course. Thanks for giving us the exclusive. Thank you. You have the exclusive. Hopefully people write it up. You know, you never know. Of course. Media outlets, Ben, feel free. Ben is open and he's willing to sell all the family secrets just in the name of his cookbook. You are. I do give you my permission to write it up if you'd like to. Oh, thanks. Yeah. Well, we love you. We're so happy. Thank you. Make sure to get your copy of Let's Give It a Taste, Making Mealtime a Moment by Ben Soffer. Now available wherever you buy books. So that's Amazon, local bookstores, indie bookstores, Barnes & Noble, all the places. So check it out. We love you. Thanks so much for stopping by. And click the link. There's probably a link in YouTube. Just like quickly click. And make sure you get yourself added to that list. Yeah, yeah. You're going to want to be on the list. I guarantee it. I won't give it to Hitler. Okay. All right. Thank you guys. Bye. Love you. Oh, wait. Should we leave this here? Sure, yeah. Just like consistent promo? No, what we do is we put it on the shelf. Yes. Put it on the shelf. Okay. Put it on the shelf. Put it on the shelf. Where on the shelf? Where's the spritz has to go? Yeah, it's okay. We'll cover the spritz. It's okay. Yes, yes, yes. Wow. That's our businessman Show. Do you know who that framed photo is? He's probably the, he's the CEO of something. Of what? Black Rock? No, but he would probably be a good businessman. He's the CEO of Spirit Halloween. That's so funny. And he's an amazing businessman. Of the week. Even though like he's got to like figure out like the Officer Dickie Down stuff. There's like a weird little section over there. Did you see that? Thank God he's gone. No, I'm kidding. Welcome back to the toast. Just Your Girl's back again. We haven't had a guest in so long. It was fun. It was. He said it's family. I'm glad we like probably won't have to do it for another year. Yeah. Unless of course any members of the Golden Globes voting party wants to join us on our show. You're more than welcome. Let's talk about the exclusive behind the scenes. Of what it's like hosting such a high stakes show. Let's go. It's true. How are you? I'm good. Oh, I need to be more interesting instead of saying I'm good. Oh my God. You're so critical. It's okay. By the way, I think people actually really enjoy our show because we're always like good. You know, like we're not like crazy like having like manic episodes. And nobody like watches just the intro over and over and over like I did. Like I said I'm good and then we get into something interesting. You're being so self-critical and of course like this art, this is our art. It's deeply important and personal to us. But go easy on yourself, girlfriend. Thank you so much. I actually went to a really fun event last night. It was a Mahjong fundraiser. Oh, and it was crazy because it was for breast cancer. Like so fantastic. So important. And I didn't get the memo. To wear pink? To wear pink. And the one time in my life. What'd you wear? I just wore like a cream sweater and black jeans. Black? I was like so. So not you. I looked like so anti, you know. Oh, so you actually want more breast cancer is what it sounds like. That's what it sounded like. But like I don't, everyone was wearing pink and I'm usually always wearing pink. Accidentally. Put me down for wearing pink. Put me down for thinking it's a genocide. Put me down for wearing pink 90% of the time. Like imagine my shock to be the only one not in pink. It was like. That's like. Did Olivia wear pink? Yes. And she didn't tell you? No. I guess everyone, no one told me. I mean, it's so obvious. Apparently like they sent out an email an hour before like reminding people but I wasn't on the email list because I was a last minute addition. Nobody probably thought to remind me because they assumed I'd be wearing pink. She did not be reminded. Like 95% of the time I am wearing a shade of pink somewhere. That's terrible. Last night I was just like too cool for school. Well, I didn't go to this event because I didn't want to and I wasn't invited but I did watch a Knick game. I did watch a Knick game and I wanted to update you that the Knicks did win. Oh, good. And now they're 2-3. Not good. 2-3. Oh, but you said 0-3. They played the night before last as well. Oh, oh. 2-3. Okay, that's better. So we're like not embarrassing anymore. Oh, and did you know that it was a World Series? I did vaguely, no, because Mary Orton is a Bruins fan. Shout out to Nick Vial who also is a. The other Bruins fan that I follow. No, that's not the name of the team, sweetheart. Brewers. Brewers. Well, I'm happy for Mary and Nick. Okay, did you see the video of the guy putting his wedding ring on? Like, I love him. No, I haven't seen anything. So what I like about baseball is that all the players have a little bit of a belly. Like, I just like that. And so the pitcher, I don't know much about the makeup of the Brewers team but I imagine he's one of the stars and he like threw it out. The game ended and he won and like obviously people are storming the field. There's media and like the first thing he does is he reaches into his back pocket and puts his wedding ring back on. Like, I guess you take it off when you're pitching. like so it doesn't get in the way um and like at the height of his career he's achieved this like major major like honestly historic milestone for his team i don't think they've like ever won and if they haven't if they have it's been a really long time and the first thing he thought to do was put his wedding ring back on mensch i love him that's really cute it was well mazel tov to the milwaukee congrats to the midwesterners that's exciting yeah yeah they deserve it i couldn't if you paid said to me claudia right now i'll give you 10 million dollars transferred to tell me who the brewers played i was about to say who did the brewers play i'm gonna just go out on a limb and tell me if this is right i'm gonna guess the dodgers no okay did are they called the brewers because they have a lot of breweries and they brew beer sorry my knowledge just ends with that that it's the name i don't know anything beyond that that would be like another cute name like the magic right but that would be more like the milwaukee cheesers it was the dodgers oh and who did they play tampa oh how did you not know that it's like sunshine oh i was thinking the stingray maybe it's uh double entendre it's a stingray but also there's a lot of sunshine special meaning the people who are naming these teams are so cute that is really cute and like the brewers it's like the local industry just like the magic but i don't think that breweries are the local industry of milwaukee i'm pretty sure like cheese baking is that's i'm gonna stop right there unless i give away my ignorance what's your ignorance about where's milwaukee i'm so glad you brought that up i happen to know because i've been i have been to milwaukee it's in wisconsin because i was gonna say that's wisconsin yeah exactly and i've been to wisconsin mary lives in wisconsin so does peter kraus and i believe nick vial is from milwaukee wisconsin are you sure yes and what i know about wisconsin is that they eat cheese green bay packers and everybody puts the cheese on their head cheese heads and they pack cheese is that why they're called the packers maybe they're packagers of cheese they do a lot of dairy over there and if i i have to go back to the map game oh meat packing meat packing they're the packers like i like that meat packing is kind of new york's thing like is there a town is there a team called the minors for there are the minor leagues for coal mining towns where are the minors they're fucking working like they're not thinking about they're not listening to this podcast they're the only people in this actually actual country who work i just oh i like that they're naming the teams after like the local trade have you been seeing some of the um just like reactions and discourse to kim's autobiography not auto kim's biography not a lot i don't want spoilers i have been spoiling it because i've decided that i'm not going to read it um i saw an excerpt that they must have given to like vanity fair or just confirming like the author says like he did his research and kim like has had no major invasive surgeries and just like really downplaying that her ass is real her tits are real and i just really but i saw that i was like i'm not reading this book it's giving like kardashian propaganda i did and i do know at this point like kim actually can't tell everyone that her ass is fake because it will have been a two decades long lie and she will look like such a liar but to continue to propagate like i i won't be a part of it like i was wondering because they're very open they talk but like they don't talk about the butt and the butt all of their asses and chloe's and i think they like get away you know she had her butt x-rayed i don't think she has a fake butt in there but i think like you know it was enhanced it was obviously enhanced but they say like my butt is real because there's not a fake piece of thing in there like it's a rod fat from somewhere else um and i feel like everyone just like doesn't talk about the butt anymore so i was wondering how they would deal with it in the book and i thought they might ignore it but instead they he the and her boobs are real and that they haven't had any major procedures done and then they're focusing on like a nose job she's like and and i proved i didn't have a nose job i don't think you had a nose i don't care if you had a nose job that's like literally so not even what anyone's talking about like so irrelevant like and i think even more shocking than the butt is the boobs are those really her boobs i mean she's a woman's almost 50 like that's insane how is that it's just not possible um also i saw somebody like recapping the book today and someone who i like like and content um that the book just seems like really like kim like obviously this is her approved biography but it just seems like kim's point of view so much especially like a lot of the book is about courtney and how like courtney just um is like very jealous this is like the author came to this conclusion that like the courtney is just like extremely jealous of the success that kim maintained at a young age and like courtney always thought that it should be her she just didn't have like the drive or the hustle to get there and like it's a lot about courtney and apparently courtney was very difficult to nail down for her interview as well it took like nine months um and kim is like yeah like she's like really hard to get in touch with like you know ever since she married travis and like it all boils down to travis so it just feels like first of all all the stuff we see on the show about courtney is like definitely real but also i don't know it just doesn't feel like a totally hands-off autobiography excuse me um that's really surprising and i feel like could cause major damage between the two of them and i the thing is i think that there is like already like worse than interesting i'm going to read it and i don't feel like from what i know up until this point like i don't feel like that's true i don't feel like courtney is jealous of kim i don't feel like courtney wants what kim has no and maybe when they were younger and like you know they're all these like young hot shots in la doing the stores and fashion and like kim takes off as paris's assistant and she does eventually bring her family up with her to her level but maybe when you're young i could see there being jealousy for sure like maybe that's what they're referring to but no now there's no jealousy dynamics can shift so drastically in a family like if i think back to like 10 years ago like what our dynamic was even the kardashians remember when like courtney and chloe were so mean to kim yeah and when they were so close and now and it's just like that might have been true at one point but it's not at all true right now and not at all the issues that they're having right now right so i'll listen to mr van meter's argument but that's not how jack sees it me neither but i will read the book yeah but i did find that shocking like the button moves like i'd rather they didn't say anything like just how is that possible yeah i actually feel bad for kim because she's like in this spot where i don't think she's a dishonest person i think actually she's like kind of radically honest about all the things in her life and i think when she was young she didn't want to share this thing about her butt and then they did like that whole stupid x-ray and she just sort of like has never been able to renege on that because she went so far to like defend herself at the time and now it's just been so much time and i also think she did all that stuff before the buck got bigger well we do forget that when kim was launched on the scene she was just a girl with an amazing body who had like a small waist and like a not even a big ass but like hips and when she would wear those tight or veilish hair dresses you could really see the hourglass figure she then became a caricature of that look but no she did get a lot of attention at a time because she had like a little bit of like a chubby ass like it wasn't yeah insane looking but than most but not like what it is today no she just like got a lot of attention for it and so i think she kept making it bigger yeah and i feel bad talking about the butt like i don't want to talk about i feel like howard stern oh i don't feel bad like harping on kim's butt and we never talk i don't even think about the butt but like yes if you're telling the story of kim kardashian like the butt is what started it all a huge part of her story her origin story and we don't talk about the butt or the butts or the siblings butts or everybody everybody has a new butt because whatever and then they obviously like became obsessed with this one i don't know what it is fat injections this one type of procedure it's fat injection they all took it so far i don't know what it is i don't know what it is but i don't know what it is but i don't know what it is but i don't know what it is that season where chloe is like walking around with like a diaper on and the blue jeans like the light wash blue jeans they all and then the pick kim sees the pictures of herself on the beach at joe francis's house and like has a breakdown um they all started to tone it down after that but they all obviously kylie too like saw what kim was doing was getting a lot of attention for it and it looked good until a point and now i think they've come back down but even kim's ass now it's not her ass like what are we talking about no i think it's a real thorn in her side too because she's obsessed with being skinny i wish she never started i think she thinks she wishes she never started the whole ass thing but i wonder if she thinks like that's why she's so successful it's really for sure it is honestly like a huge conversation jackie also in culture like how we now think of women's bodies like do you literally small waist big ass like that's the look people bbls are so popular like everyone i think they're falling out of style yes now but this whole thing started with kim it starts and ends with kim the beauty constructs the beauty standards kim's ass it's like the like it started her career and so like this is a huge conversation we never have it because again i don't want to be talking about someone's butt when she's so much more than that to me you know of course but but if you're writing the book on kim and you're not even touching it the first chapter has to be called the ass like it's it's huge well i meant the topic but also the ass of course yeah so like already it's not an authentic story biography that's exactly how i felt and i was like am i really gonna waste my time reading this anthology when they can't even be honest about like the one thing that's so clearly fake and the boobs though but like i thought we just like i didn't even think that was like a secret or like everyone gets real boobs right everyone gets their boobs done we should dive into the stories because we're sort of circling the drain and we have your toasters today so okay well then you know what i had picked four stories i was gonna pick a fifth but let me leave it at four so i can get to make time for the dtq without further do it is time for the fast five stories that yet i do need to know and the fast five stories that you need to know are brought to you by may you know, it's never a bad time to shop at Macy's, but there are particularly good times. 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She also went on Call Her Daddy. Of course. Thus proving my theory that she doesn't need a hair care line. She needs a podcast. For sure. For sure. She's talking about her plastic surgery. The interview with The Cut talks a lot about like her nerves in launching this brand. Like I really think it's really just like a passion of hers. I'm sorry. You cannot get me to care about this. She says that she took like nose training classes to like so that she can perfect the scent. So that way she can know really what it smells like. Why are you telling me that? Like what do you want me to say? I don't know. Seriously, what do you want me to say? Let's talk about her plastic surgery. Since I guess today we're talking about women's looks. And everyone has a lot to say about how different they think she looks. Yes. So she shared in The Cut that she wants to be a sexy mom at drop off. I want to look like a woman that has her shit together, even when I've just woken up and I don't have my shit together. So it's really also the ethos for Mess. It's like someone who's like, you know, sort of just rolling around. Rolling out of the house, but you want like the important things to look good. So you've gotten your work done and your hair looks good and you have a- You're not overly glam. Right, exactly. So she shared that she had her boobs done after her second child. She said that one day she will get a facelift. And that she talked about like all the different hair stuff that she did. But people are pointing out- Like her eyes. That she appears to have gotten the- Upper bleph. The upper bleph. Yeah, which I think is like a corrective surgery for hooded eyes. Now, I don't have hooded eyes. So I can't say that if I did, maybe I wouldn't also get this surgery. But I think that there's like literally nothing wrong with them. Maybe sometimes it's hard to wear eyeliner. Sure. I can't believe this is such a popular surgery. Because like I see nothing wrong with- Like I understand why people get nose jobs. You know, sometimes a big nose is not like- Sometimes it's beautiful, of course. I don't understand why this surgery got so popular. Like what's wrong with a hooded eye? I don't know. And then also- Especially the most beautiful woman in the world, Jennifer, Laurence has them. If it's pretty much established that she got this surgery, and I would agree like the- Pictures are compelling. The case is compelling. Then to like go and talk about your plastic surgery and like be open and just ignore something very obvious is deceptive. Agreed. Don't talk about it if you're not going to talk about it in full. And I'm of the mind like nobody owes me an explanation. The beauty standard. I don't give a fuck. Not at all. And I have eyes. So like if you're looking better than you did before and it looks like it's more than just like a little weight loss- Green tea. And a little moisturizer, I can make my own jump to- And yeah, you got something done and great. Good for you. No, I don't feel- But then when you start opening up like, well, I didn't do this and I did do this and it's like, but I think there's a lie in there. It's not adding up. No, I do not. And I think people disagree with me, but I'm not one of those people who's emphatic that every public figure who's a woman tells us everything they've ever done to their face. I seriously don't care. But if you're going to start the conversation, like- I don't need Anne Hathaway to tell me, Lindsay. Like I can see something's new. Great job. I can see. I don't- Great job. Looks great. Yeah. So I'm not loving this like J-Law era. I can't lie. And it's crazy because I feel like this is what I've always wanted from J-Law. She's like, we know she's this bubbling personality. We like never get to see it unless she's like on an award show carpet once a year, if she goes that year. But so yeah, we're getting, she's on my whole fucking timeline. Like at every like low brow editorial magazine. It's very incongruous with the J-Law image. She's sort of worked hard to create for herself. And even what I've seen from her on Call Her Daddy, I'm not like- But I also like feel bad even judging it because she keeps coming to the internet with like, please be nice to me, please. Like she actually can't handle it. And even in this article, she's like so nervous about what she's putting out. She has to like continue to just be like, I have to believe that it's the best thing that has ever existed or else I can't function. And so it's like, you don't even want to be critical because like she's just being so honest about her insecurities. Like we all feel that way and we all receive criticism. Yeah, no, that's very big of you. I will be critical just because like it is my job and I'm not loving this era. And I think you're right. It might be a real passion project and I don't think she's like lying about any of this. I think she's actually being very authentic. But just of all the things I would want her to like blow up and do press over, it's like, this is not it. Yeah. And it's just like such a 180 from- The girl we know. Who never even had Instagram in the whole heyday. And I can't really stress how disappointed I was. When I found out like, this is why she joined Instagram. Yeah. And she said she met with a like social media consultant who was like, cause she knew like every founder will have to be on Instagram. and the person told her it didn't have to be like what she thought it would be like every single day posting the ins and outs of her life like still she's only posted like three or four things and she can do like hair tutorials doesn't have to be she doesn't want to show her own thing she can be in when she's in a hotel or something well i saw she did a get ready with me and i actually felt like i was in the twilight zone like i was like what am i watching yeah and like i'm not hurt i'm just disappointed like i i actually thought she like wanted to be on instagram with us you know what i mean like i feel silly like i actually feel stupid i was so excited when she joined i'm like our girl's finally here she resisted long enough and we know that she's not like totally unplugged like she loves the kardashians she says she has finsta she sends memes to her friends she sees everything she's like like obsessed with like with tv shows and when she does pressure like reference random influencers like so it's not that she doesn't like it she does like it she has social media she's always so when she joined i was like we got her yeah and i just feel silly i do yeah well this is like the big week of j-law i would say yeah i'm really curious like how many people have bought this hair care company and i i have heard that the care care company is called either mess or messa actually i saw that it's called mess and it's because mess was already trademarked inspiring so it would have been a beautiful founder story so it would have been called it's a relatable founder it is it's so real it would have been called mess then so which i i actually appreciate knowing that because i felt like when it was a mess degree it's like well i already i don't understand this is above this is too highbrow for me like fancy and i don't get it and i feel left out no i saw her that it's meant to be called mess it's like for the messy girl i saw her applying the product and it is for the messy girl she had like this sort of um like unkempt bed head even though like her hair is great she put some of the product in her hair looked exactly the same and she said she was ready to go and i was like oh my god i'm so sorry i'm so okay but i just want to say now that it's not like mess degree you don't understand this because like you're poor and ugly it's like hot mess it's like mess like there isn't a brand of hair care that's like catering to the messy girl no i would argue that a hair care exists to undo the mess or even if you are going for like that sort of like teased it's like a very stylized yeah i want but there are makeup brands that are for the clean girl there are makeup brands that are for the natural girl and i would argue that there are brands that are for the natural girl like you know just the bare minimum like skin looking makeup there's not a hair care brand that's not doing the most no this is definitely like a very niche market because i really do think like no matter what hair texture hair type you have short long curly straight like we all actually don't want our hair to look messy like that's we're all just trying to contain the frizz contain um so there might be like a group of people who need this product it's not me i'm just understanding more of the brand story today that's beautiful which is what i've sought out to do yeah and i would say the degree really threw me off and i would like someone to answer for the degree because i'm not seeing it addressed and i'm also not seeing it anywhere where did you see the degree sign everywhere like when i was like looking i didn't see you think they removed the degree or they might have like just to i think this degree yeah i think the degree is meant to um you see it yes i think it's meant to convey the science behind the products because jen said the founder's story is that she heard a ted talk from this bioengineer scientist and she hunted her down um so i think the degree sign is like hey we're not messing around when it comes to the lab lab me we've practiced lab grown hair care i think you're 100 right and like thank you for the explanation let's go back to that show have you ever heard of the lab grown hair care i think you're 100 right and like thank you for the i don't know i feel different like i've never felt this way so i'm feeling like you've never said that before you made an excellent point and i just want to honor that just for a moment if i may and maybe like honor jay law for bringing no no let's honor me and how right i am right in like such a hundred percent kind of jay law so sort of like gave you that slam dunk did she tell you like what the degree was no you know what i did it's just like i just used my brain i just thought about it i just thought about it and i said it isn't that funny how that works isn't it i can't wait for my mess degree pr like honestly oh and i will be calling it mess degree of course oh my god you know what's so sad that like if she wasn't the butt of this joke like jay law would love this segment like it's true but i guess like the idea my verdict is i know that like you i have i am coming at a critical i have my verdict is still pending like i'm still open and i feel like she's still waiting for her pr i'm waiting for pr um actually i haven't seen like lots of pr boxes i haven't seen any she's like done obviously like all the things you're supposed to do join instagram go and call her daddy and the next step in that is usually sending out pr boxes to influencers and the product is already out so i can't wait to see like the preview for influencers it's over she needs to send it to acquired she does need to make a tiktok with acquired them like putting their hair in rollers and just like in acquired they should have like acquired as like the first like campaign face making like a cute little video even though like acquired herself and her brand like are getting into their hair but they have rollers like this is different for sure but like it's not that different and honestly like i would save your like people really trust acquired so i would save that for her own brand honestly of hair care yeah that's obviously going to be like a thing she does you think yeah like at some point but she's got fifi she's so busy and fifi's doing so maybe fifi will do the hair care but like the it'll be there if he would be a good name for like blowout serum and stuff yeah okay are you ready for our next story selena gomez and demi lovato recreate their most iconic moments for a new rare beauty campaign okay i was like seriously gagged when i saw this i kind of was too first of all i do forget about the princess protection i just like came on my on my phone scrolling and i hear you yo yo yo yeah i said it twice got a problem with that like i was not okay and i didn't know that that was going to be happening so i was truly sad for this campaign so selena and demi like former best friends have teamed up for rare beauty's bundle of new blushes and they're recreating um some of their old youtube videos some of their poses from princess protection program and just like the glory days i would call them and it's so funny because when i think about the era of disney and demi and selena i do forget about the princess protection program because that was like not a crazy popular decon i didn't even realize that they're both in it that's their like movie together yeah it wasn't like it was big at the time but like in the hall of fame i haven't thought of it agreed since when i saw the when i saw the picture of them recreating the poster i was like oh yeah what was that movie they did we're like one of them's like a dutch princess and the other's like homeless or something and one of them is like the bodyguard no no like who's the princess to me and then she comes to live with like selena's family like selena's poor you know interesting yeah so honestly not until we're discussing this right now did i realize they were in a movie together for me it was about the youtube video like yo yo yo yeah i said i probably had a problem with that and then like where's miley and mandy exactly back i like i actually like this i think that a lot of times very like julia styles not to keep throwing her onto the bus like when you rely on like nostalgia it's just like very low bar low hanging fruit like to get people excited and it always works but i don't feel like it requires like any like level of taste or talent i happen to have thought that this was really cool and i think it's really cool and smart especially because these two have not historically as far as i know been good they weren't at each other's weddings um i hope the demi got paid right yeah why don't you call her demi her name is demi no i get confused because demi was in the background of dancing with the stars the other night yes demi you think she's paid yeah yeah i do think so rare beauty has a lot of money it's a billion worth over a billion dollars yeah yeah i would say like any other thing that selena could have you know she could have recreated like some wizard way to play some she could have this like lore runs so deep for me that it's a plus i agree old star selena looked great oh did you we didn't talk about this but like a week or two ago selena took to instagram to talk about the fact that like her voice is so different and easily and she blamed it on the fact that she vaped for so many years which i haven't heard as a side effect of vaping i obviously vaped myself for many years um but it sounds possible and it's interesting that she like knows what people say she like just admitted to vaping for so long i feel like she's sort of just like well if you watched her apple documentary which we both did her vape was in the whole her vape was a main character was it when you have a true vape addiction you cannot hide it yeah it's glued to you and that was her her that was her truth and she doesn't vape anymore i don't think so very interesting her voice is very different yeah so like obviously her singing voice but i'm talking about her talking voice we're talking yeah yeah are you ready for our next story i am amanda batula exits in the city ahead of season two amid controversy relationship with west wilson a lot of people they shook up the this in the city but nobody cares about anything besides these amanda has exited in the city ahead of season two one source claimed to page six that the network wanted amanda to return for the second season in a more limited part-time capacity according to that source amanda wanted her boyfriend west involved in filming but that showrunners were adamant he not be included which paychecks is told influenced her decision to walk away from the show opportunity altogether that's actually crazy however a second source denied that saying it's just not the right time for either of them to appear on the show a third source said money was the issue claiming amanda wanted a certain salary for season two that Bravo was simply not willing to provide. I kind of believe all three. Yeah, because the city is not a popular show, so her expecting the salary she was probably getting on Summer House is not a reasonable request, but, like, she is the show. I do think the idea that the network wouldn't want West or would want Amanda in a smaller capacity is a mistake. Like, they need to lean in. I'm sorry, and the city was such an unimpactful first season. It's all we're talking about. No, but also, like, all the impact that it made was due to, like, Kyle and Amanda and the storylines that carried over for Summer House, and then people started watching again to see clues of Amanda and West on in the city. Like, that is the thread that runs through in the city and is, like, responsible for most of the success of the show. Any success they had is, like, collateral damage from Summer House. Yeah, like, then, yeah, Whitney and Kenny and. Getting engaged. Like, Carl is now going to be included as a full-time cast member. He was excluded from the show entirely. Does that mean these people are not on Summer House, or do they have two shows now? They might have two shows. Like, Kyle is on Summer House. But I thought that they were, like, slowly transitioning Kyle out of Summer House. Like, Kyle should not be on Summer House. But he's on this season, like, Kissing Sierra. Right, right. Also, per the source, Danielle and her boyfriend, Eon, as well as Andrea and his wife, Lexi, both of who just welcomed babies, were not asked back. Now, I just want to say, neither of them were particularly compelling. However, I thought this show was, like, supposed to be about, like, the Valley. People going through postpartum, postpartum, that phase of life after, you know, your Summer House era. Now, Lexi, the episodes that I saw, Lexi and Andrea, like, really gave nothing. Like, nothing. Danielle, like, is a stuff starter. And she did just come off of, like, a very traumatic and what might be, like, a relatable and intriguing story with her NICU story. So, I do feel like it's a little premature to get rid of Danielle, even though she is just disliked. Like, that's the problem. You do. That's how I feel about Amanda. Like, there was probably zero chance of me watching in the city, but if Wes and Amanda were on it, I probably, like, 100% would have watched it. I think everyone would tune in. They need them, like, so badly. Did you see Alex Cooper ask Jennifer Lawrence if she thought Amanda and Wes should be filming on Summer House? And she, like, she didn't know how to answer. She just, like, struck. She's, like, afraid of getting canceled. I think so, because I think the answer is yes, of course. Even Andy said it at BravoCon or BravoFanFest. But it's, like, obviously inappropriate. Why? Why is it inappropriate? Now, Ciara's not on the show. Ciara's on the show. In the city? No, I'm saying Summer House. Oh, I actually don't think that they should be on Summer House. Like, it's actually too explosive. They would have to get rid of Ciara, and that's just wrong. Like, it's not fair. And, no, like, living in the house, it's weird. No, now they're in a mature relationship. I think, like, actually in the city is the perfect place for them to not only earn a living, but, like, to start to earn a little bit of favor with people. They seem to be in a real relationship. I don't know. I kind of, like, really want to see them. Yeah, me too. And I also feel like because she's not on Summer House, like, she wants more money to do the one show. She's literally going to be, like, the butt of every joke. She's going to put herself out there to such a degree. I think she deserves whatever salary she was asking for. Completely agree. I believe, like, every single one of these things. I think she wanted him on the show, and they said no. I think that's also wrong. Why would we only want half of the story? Like, he's the crazy one. Like, I would love to see both of them. I think they should both get paid. Because, by the way, putting themselves out there like that, like, the fans and the world has decided, like, they're totally, nothing's off limits. Like, we could say whatever we want. The shit that they were saying at the time of the reunion was kind of like with Raquel. Like, we were literally basically telling someone to kill herself, and everyone's like, okay. Like, so in order to endure that, you do deserve to be compensated. Yeah, I agree. And I really would have watched that. I think that she's, I think that's a pretty, like, smart approach from her. Like, I'll do this. For a price. Yeah. But if it's not, even though it's all the things that come with it, too, but even though brands aren't going to be, like, flocking to work with her, she deserves the money. No, but, like, you can live off of, like, the salary of a high-paying reality show. I am curious, like, how they are living. Yeah. I think Amanda saved a lot of money, like, for a long time. And she's not, like, super indulgent. No. But just, like, living in Manhattan in a nice apartment, like, will run you dry. Yeah. Not even living extravagantly, like, just going out to dinners and stuff. I don't know. Yeah. Big, big mistake. Everyone should have tried to make it work. Yeah. And then they also said, like, a new cast member, maybe someone from The Bachelor. Oh, yeah. I've heard. I like when they do that, someone I know. Me too. Not that I watch anything, but, like. I will not be watching this, so. I think it's a good idea. Yeah. Yeah. And then our fourth story, Tyler Cameron speaks out after being caught on camera storming off Dancing with the Stars. Like, the way people were so quick to be, like, he's a red flag. You guys are sick. Like, nobody can be a human. No, nobody can just, like, walk away from something they're not enjoying. Of course. And, like, you should see me when I'm fed up with something. Like, I thought it was a very tame reaction. So in a new TikTok video he spoke about being eliminated. He thanked Sharna and called the show a once-in-a-lifetime experience while also addressing what he described as a real human moment out of him. He said, Not my proudest moment. When I was upstairs getting my scores, I thought we were done filming. I needed to step away from it all. I was disappointed in myself. It was boom or bust at that point. We needed to have a great score or we were out of this competition. And it was bust in my head. And I felt like I let myself down. More importantly, I thought I had let Sharna down. And it was hard. It was very clear what was going on. I don't need this explanation. Thank you, Tyler. But people were very quick to like, Toxic man. He's so toxic. So many bitches are not fucking okay. Like, he's allowed to be upset. And that's what we were saying yesterday. I think like week after week of just like, first of all, leaving your pregnant fiance at home, working so hard physically, emotionally on this thing that just doesn't come naturally to you. And every week it's like getting worse and worse. I think it's very frustrating and any human being would be emotional about it. And yeah, like I would have done worse. Yeah. And it's like in that moment when he's getting his scores, it's as if he's being told he's going home. That's his reaction. Right. As if he's knowing he's going home. It was the nail in the coffin. Sharna said, literally every bit of technique that got called out is everything that we've been working on all week. And to be honest, I watched it back and I think he executed a lot of it beautifully. I think your score should not have been sevens. I don't know why you were given sevens. I didn't think it was like that god awful. But it was obviously like not enough to keep him going. Yeah, the bar has just been raised also. Yeah. Yeah, but it wasn't like they collaterally like. No, nobody fell. Yeah, colossal. Colossal. Collaterally. Collaterally. Just not, I hope not collaterally. Collaterally, of course. Let's get to your toasters. Which is brought to you by KitchenAid, a new sponsor, but not a new company in our lives. Not at all. I used my KitchenAid yesterday to make muffins. I use my KitchenAid all the time. Life hack, your KitchenAid stand mixer making mashed potatoes. So KitchenAid helps you make more than meals. They create connections. They think about mealtime differently, not as a problem that needs to be solved, but as an immersive process that's meant to be enjoyed and shared with others. So with KitchenAid, it's not just about the food, it's about connecting while making it. They make meals to an entry point, something deeper, connection to yourself, to others, to the moment you're creating. 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All right, let's dive into Dear Toasters, our weekly advice segment, now happening on Thursdays. Um, where members of our community, they look to us for guidance, for support about whatever it is they're going through. If you want to email us, you can actually, deartoasters at gmail.com, or head over to our website, thetoastpodcast.com. There's a little submission box when you scroll down. That's how you can get your message to us. If you're going through something, maybe we can help you out. Maybe we can't, but we'll try. Hey, Jackson Turney, and the theme of today's selects are husbands, like questionable husbands. Hello, Jackson Turney. I need advice on how to talk to my husband about his hygiene. I was recently doing over a week's worth of laundry, and I was folding it. I noticed there was only one, right, one pair of my husband's underwear in there, which had me thinking, has my husband only changed his underwear once in the last week or even longer? I did the laundry from start to finish today, so it was like, it wasn't like it was clean clothes in a basket, yada, yada. Because of this, I casually asked him when the last time he showered was, to which he said, I don't remember. This is not the first time I've noticed that he doesn't but in my opinion, a man in his 30s needs to be showering every day, or at least changing his underwear every day. He works from home, so it's not like he's going out in public like this, but it still really bugs me. I don't want to make him feel bad about himself, so how do I approach this without coming off mean? Disclaimer, he actually takes his oral hygiene very seriously, so he's not like completely unhygienic. Is there any chance that he's just not wearing underwear? No, because when she asked him the last time he showered, he said he couldn't remember. But maybe that was like, because it was, you know, yesterday morning. Like, maybe he's just like. Maybe, I don't want to be an alarmist, and I don't want to overreact, but I do feel like the idea that your husband might be going through some sort of mental illness is very real. Because not showering, not changing your underwear, is not normal. Now, I think I make some exceptions for women, you know, like with your hair, whatever, you're not showering, washing your hair every day. Like, men shouldn't wash their hair every day. Men should wash their hair every day. Like, men should shower minimum once if not twice a day. This is insane. And I think maybe he's actually dealing with some sort of like manic episode. Like, this is not normal. Yeah, I think also like the picture you're painting of him working from home, so he doesn't need to shower. You're the only one that's around him, and he doesn't keep up like basic standard hygiene. Though he doesn't smell. Which is a feat in and of itself. I just like, I think you need to really lay down a lot. This is just unacceptable. Yeah, like, well, maybe we could, no. This is so unacceptable. To expect someone to live with you, have sex with you, and you don't even shower. No offense, like, who the fuck do you think you are? Yeah. Barring any sort of mental illness, because I know when you're going through like a, like an actual depressive episode, like, you can't shower, you can't, you can't brush your hair, you can't take care of yourself. Sure. If that's happening, let's get him help. But if he's just like refusing to be hygienic for the sake of like, you know, time management. Yeah. And he doesn't have to, and he's unacceptable. As in not acceptable. This is like, so needs to be nipped in the butt. It's gross. Sometimes I feel like people who don't even shower, like, change their underwear. You know what I mean? It's like a, it's like a cheat code. Yes. But I also feel like sometimes men don't wear underwear. Really? Especially if he's not leaving the house, and he's probably like in sweats or whatever. I don't know what to be true, but it's possible. I feel like only girls don't wear underwear. Unless they're swimming. And some men even wear underwear swimming. I feel like men are always wearing underwear. Maybe I'm wrong. I'm just talking about women. I'm just talking about the one man I know. It just seems like that's also could be true. Well, that would be an explanation for the lack of laundry. And like part of me wants to be like happy for you that like you're doing less laundry. And like Ben always wears underwear because he's never wearing pants. True. So that's why he's. No, but like Ben's never gone to an event or like. But he's not going to events. True. Ben's never sat for a meeting in our house. Because he's in his underwear. It's true. It's true. It's true. No, I'm very, I'm coming from a place of privilege. Like he could just be wearing sweatpants with no underwear or pajama pants with no underwear. He could. And you didn't even ask that. Then I would be a little bit more specific with your question. And like, and if some people take showers at night, some in the morning, when you ask him when did you last shower, he might have like not remembered because he didn't realize it was like a life or death question. Like. Right. He might have just been like, maybe it was yesterday. He didn't realize you were doing an audit. Like or the day before. Yeah. Like not, doesn't mean he didn't shower for a week. Well, that's nice of you to give the benefit of the doubt. Especially if he doesn't smell. He doesn't smell. I feel like it might really not be all that bad. You're just asking the wrong questions and looking at the wrong clues. But you said this is not the first time I've noticed that he doesn't shower that often. Not just this one time. What's that often? Because at this rate, I'll take every other day. Of course. And I wouldn't consider that like, that's not the ideal for me, but it's not like a red flag. You know, because back in the day, they showered once a year. That wasn't good either. I feel like you would really, really know, like your sheets, like his side of the bed would be like stained. He would just be really gross. And you're not saying that he is. You're not saying that. You're saying more so like that just as unacceptable social behavior. Well, I would really find out what's going on in your own home. Hey, Swirlies. Love you dearly. And I listen daily. I'm seeking advice because I recently started making share content on social media in the hopes that it would become a side hustle and a stream of income. I'm having so much fun with it and I'm seeing some growth and traction. The only problem is my husband hates it. He doesn't use TikTok. He thinks it's all a waste of time and cringe. He hates taking my OOTD videos of me when we're going on date night, aka the times that I look the cutest. Every time I ask, it turns into a fight and I get disappointed by him. He's really a very sweet and loving husband. So this is truly his only flaw. Am I being unreasonable for asking him to help me with my content and to be enthusiastic about this new passion project? Or should I respect his POV and capture content on my own time and not involve him? Sincerely, a fellow Instagram thirst monster. I need you to do what you're doing. Don't let him stop you. If asking him for help is like turning into a bummer, like there's a tripod is fantastic. Yeah, like do the content on your own before you leave for date night. I do understand like having content ruining a nice night. It doesn't sound like that's exactly just like has a problem with you doing this. And I have a problem with him having a problem. But like if you weren't asking him for help with anything, like would he care at all that you're doing this? Like would he be more supportive? It's just the fact that he doesn't like actually doing it. The funny thing about this is I think it actually happens a lot with women who social media like on the side. And it isn't until they start like earning money, sometimes more money than their husbands, that the husbands stop being like such fucking haters. So you could like continue to prove to him and like bring home your big, your big checks. And it will change his demeanor. I do think like you're both sort of right and wrong. He's mostly wrong. But when someone's on a date night, and like you're just doing a million pictures before it does, it's annoying as fuck. Like it is it is and I want your husband to support you trying to take a picture and like and the person is a curmudgeon. Like you're both right and you're both wrong. Yeah, I completely agree. And if he's not on the internet at all, like doesn't know about any of this. And he's just like, boy, week seven, and his wife is just like on the phone. Like, yeah, it's confusing. You know, yeah, I do. So I don't think he's a bad guy or anything. No. And but it's a bummer for you. And you're obviously like very driven and excited by this. And I think there are ways that you could do it without him. Not even because like, for anything, it will make it easier for you. Yeah, if you're like, every time he needs to take a picture of you, like it becomes a fight, you're gonna do less content. Yeah, you should. And then you're like, not smiling for real. And like, I mean, there's nothing that it's a highlight reel picture. And you're just like, the story behind the picture in the moment. Yeah. Yeah. All right, our third and final. Hey, Ashley sisters. I've now had two best friend friendships come to an end due to these individuals not liking my husband. While there are many reasons to not like someone significant other neither of these girlfriends of mine really had a like to stand on in their dislike for him. The so minuscule and based on almost nothing. Both friends thought that we can make it on make it out on the other side with our friendship unscathed even after calling my husband names and picking apart his character. I drew my boundary and I let them know that wouldn't be the case and our friendships have ended. I'm now wondering if these girls were the problem or if I'm just too rigid in my boundary setting. I don't play about my husband and I won't let people unjustly tear him apart. Do I need to just let these things go? Or did I do the right thing by defending my husband's honor? Well, you've given us no information. So unfortunately, we can't help you. The fact that she won't tell us what the girls said about her husband is a huge red flag. And she's saying that what they said is so minuscule. So what is it? Then she also said that they tore him apart. Well, of course, if someone's tearing your husband apart, of course, you can't be friends with them. They have complaints were based on nothing. I'm sorry, paints on almost nothing. So they tore him apart based on almost nothing. I am skeptical to help you because I'm worried that maybe your husband sucks. I know I can't help you because I have no information. But the fact that you gave is alarming to me. - But what you have told me, like I feel like you don't even see the issue clearly because you can't put you on the one hand you didn't even write it to us on the other hand they've torn your husband apart well what are we talking about then we're gonna need an update with what the issues are we're gonna need a resubmit although if i had to guess the omission of the husband's critiques tell me everything i kind of need to know yeah and i will say like just on its face like if someone's coming for your husband like i'm the type of person like your husband is your family like that's you ride for your husband but if two friends coming from a good place like have something to say that's different and you're like writing them off completely and then you won't even tell us what they are i am worried about you like i am but i don't know what sorts of friends really think that they can come to you to talk shit about your husband with something that's not like a grave concern and it doesn't sound like they were coming like to talk shit it sounds like they were like coming from a place of concern they know they just like don't like him and they have like minuscule criticisms about what are they character don't be shy if anybody if a friend had a minuscule criticism about my husband's character they would not tell me that yeah somebody's not adding up in your story but i love you rooting for you and we wish you the best and thanks for writing in thanks to everybody resubmit resubmit try again thank you guys so much for listening to the toast the money morning show we deliver the past five stories you need to know every monday through friday on youtube so if you're watching us on youtube please feel free to subscribe and give us video thumbs up we're also available as a podcast anywhere podcasts can be found so it's apple podcast youtube and spotify wherever you listen to podcasts my notes are totally five-star review about a beautiful stunning and wickedly talented we are hope you guys have an amazing day we'll see you tomorrow love ya bye reimagine how you do wellness with new first of their kind mochi bites from the number one gummy supplement brand ollie multi beauty energy and sleep mochi bites are certified vegan gluten free made with naturally sourced sweeteners delectably tasty and take your routine from mundane to extraordinary all while delivering the same expert benefits elevate your wellness with mochi bites today sold exclusively at target these statements have not been evaluated by the food and drug administration this product is not intended to diagnose treat cure or prevent any disease