Kylie & Millie Bobby Brown on Her Adoption Journey, Grieving ‘Stranger Things’ & Worst Mom Shamers | Ep. 70

Being a person is tough enough these days, let alone being a parent. That's why I use DoorDash. Because when life gets crazy, DoorDash just helps bring some order to it. Like this past week, when yet again, we ran out of whole milk. And you know, Finn needs whole milk. Because? Well, she's a tank, and she'll get mad at me. And she figured out how to yell now, so she'll let me have it. I'd rather just get the milk. And DoorDash helped with that. Came in clutch. Real life needs real relief. That's why DoorDash is there for whatever you need, whenever you need it. Life with kids is wildly unpredictable. No matter how much parents try to plan, there's always going to be chaos. Being able to offload a few to-dos and give a little more time to focus on yourself and your family is huge. We all know life gets crazy. DoorDash just helps bring a little order to it. Order now. You should make Jason watch Love Island with you. There's no chance in hell. A literal shitstorm. Like the pasta attachments for Play-Doh. Yes. Put a hat on. Your baby. And put a sock in your mouth. Oh my god, a 21-year-old mom. And oh my gosh, how good she is. Meeting her was just like, no, this is everything to me. That's your baby girl. And then I just immediately started calling every cast member. Like, you're still going to be in my life, right? Like, I was really, really scared that I was like, it was over. Not going to lie, Finney finally got on the beach. We were very curious about whether or not she was going to like the sand, because she doesn't. She doesn't particularly like grass between her toes. And it turns out we got a little beach baby. I'm very excited. Let's get this podcast started. Welcome back to Not Going to Lie, a wave original brought to you by DoorDash. I'm your host, Kylie Kelsey. I'm 5'11", and married into a similarly tall family. I'm familiar with dot cakes because I saw them on the internet. That's right. They hit my For You page because I'm cool and young and hip. Yep. So I made one. A couple. I made a couple. We made it three nights in a row. And they were delicious. It's like crunchy cake. It's actually very tasty. I don't know that I would wait in lines for them for that long, but they were delicious. And I'm still recovering from a very recent crash out. I am very particular about the kitchen and food preparation. And in particular, dishes. I love my dishwasher, and I love running it on sanitized. That's my favorite setting. I love heavy duty, and I love sanitized. It makes my heart happy. I like to blast, basically power wash my dishes, and then heat them to a temperature that is going to annihilate anything that could possibly be on them. Here's the problem. Last week, I got an error code on my dishwasher. The error code suggested that the heat pump was no longer functioning. So I called the repair service, and they very nicely came out. The very nice gentleman said, I'm going to have to pull out your dishwasher. I'm going to have to flip it over to access the heat pump. Then I'm going to replace it. Then you should be good to go. Wrong. What happened then? A waterfall of dog food was being stored inside of the dishwasher. And to make room for their storage of dog food, they had to pull out the dishwasher. And to make room for their storage of dog food, they decided to chew every wire they could find. Who's they, you might ask? Those. I was going to go so hard on curse words. The rodent, a.k.a. the me-mow, is what I call them to make them less threatening to me. My kids know them as me-mows. They're mice. Needless to say, I was on the phone with Queen Emma while I was angrily bleaching the entire kitchen. Because there was mouse droppings. And I don't want hantavirus from other people or the authentic way through rodent feces. In your kitchen. I hate mice. I judge. I judge. I judge. They're little naked tails. This is not a matter of cleanliness. I want to be clear on that. There's going to be so many people with opinions on this. They have mice in their house. You probably do too. The fuck? No. You can't keep them out. We're going to figure this out. It might. in a situation where there is a feline resident. Now that we went on that ride, I still am crashing out. It was bad. It was bad. Oh, it was so bad. Oh, thinking about it is making my skin crawl. Okay, let's get into today's episode. Coming up, I'm going to talk about the most ridiculous blowout situations I've been in with my children. How to be the best aunt or uncle ever. And after that, I'm going to be joined by someone I have no business speaking to. Actress Millie Bobby Brown. We're going to talk about all things motherhood, stranger things, and the importance of telling people to fuck off. Also, Enola Holmes 3. I'm so excited. I'm so excited. But before we get to that, we got to get to the most fiery, most no bullshit, real one comment of the week we've ever had. Brought to you by Peloton. That's Peloton. Right, real ones. We had a couple of questions for you last week and you answered. It was a clear hell yes to a monthly adoptable animal segment, which I am very excited about. And the most emphatic hell no I've ever seen in my life to Love Island. There are over 600 comments on YouTube and roughly 87% of them is some version of fuck no, do not watch Love Island. Absolutely. Not on Love Island. Please, I beg you, no Love Island. I love you guys so much. I love you guys. I think you're amazing. I think that this is women supporting women. And I am so happy to finally pull out a win when it comes to our fan questions, me against Queen Emma. Thank you guys for this. This is the one. This is the one that really mattered. Queen Emma wants me to defend Love Island a little bit because people are being harsh. But I need to remind you guys that I have built my TikTok algorithm brick by brick. And I got the clip of the two individuals saying go birds to each other. That was beautiful. Okay. And then I got multiple people saying, hey, I'm going to have to sit my millennial ass out on this season. I'm not doing it. Much to Queen Emma's dismay. Your loss, you know? It's not my, it's your, it's your, it's legitimately your loss. It's literally my loss. It is literally my loss. Lost the poll. It is actually your loss. I'm not used to losing these polls. How's it feel? Not great. Not great. I'm so glad. I thought I would win. I knew it was going to be close. Especially because of the way you set it up. Yeah. Being that you wanted everyone to defend you, but it's fucked up. Once again, I just want to reiterate, you lost. 52% of real ones said, no, we are not watching Love Island. I love that for me. I will say real one, JJRude13 did have an interesting idea. I'm going to tell you right now. I have met so many people that have told me that they watched Love Island and that their significant other actually got more into it than they were, or that they were locked in and waiting for the new episodes and they were invested. It wouldn't be my husband. I'm telling you right now. It would not be my husband. If you truly want him to watch Love Island, I'm going to need you to go over to the other podcast and comment that shit on there. Because I'm not conveying that message. What if you both watch it the next time he's on Not Gonna Lie? Absolutely not. He watched Twilight. Are you watching this season yet, Emma? People are talking some mad shit. Yeah. Mad shit. Maybe I'll agree with them. But hey, if you want Jason and Kylie to watch Love Island, you let us know right in the comments. I'm sure you'll do it. Yeah, let us know in the comments that I don't read it. That'll convince them. That'll get me. That's what's going to be the one. That's going to be. That's going to do it. Absolutely what's going to do it. All right. That's it for Love Island. Woohoo! Legitimately, that's it for Love Island. And real one comments of the week brought to you by Peloton. Next, it's Doom Scroll of the Week brought to you by Oura Ring. The world's smallest smart ring is here. Guys, look at her. This is my Oura Ring. This is the old Oura Ring. You can see. is a little beat up because I was not nice to her. difference on that? Look at me. I'm an influencer. She is. I mean, come on. Nice. Very excited about this. All right. First up on doom scroll, a literal shit storm is about to strike for this mom's tiny human. And we're all on the edge of our seats. Queen Emma. This says my baby hasn't pooped in days. So I dressed him in white and took him in public with no extra outfit. I'll update. Now she's doing all of the right things. Okay. She is tempting fate, not only through the white outfit or through going out without any additional outfits, also putting them in a carrier. Okay. My girls, for some reason, loved to capitalize on an opportunity where there was no room for it to go. Okay. Saucer seat, top choice. The baby Bjorn, little bouncer every single time. I feel like it was the baby equivalent to a squatty potty. Don't worry. This mom, she's a kind and loving soul because she gave us an update and it's good. Queen Emma, the clip. You can see where we're at right now. The blowout was of a diabolical woman. What seemed to do the trick was putting him in my favorite sleeper bamboo from wild bird. And it was white. So I'm in his bouncer and drink some coffee, having my coffee. I told my four-year-old, why don't we go to Barnes and Nobles today? So let's get a coffee. Let's walk around a little bit. And while I was making those plans, my three month old heard me and said, you know what? Sounds better. Why don't I just shit everywhere really quick. And then we can go to Barnes and Nobles. Perfect. So every time the baby ends up with something firmly against their butt, that's the key. I don't know about your babies, but mine, when the feeling struck them, gave an enthusiastic push. Guys, we're talking at the very least up the back. Okay. If you're lucky, out both sides, like the pasta attachments for Play-Doh. You're welcome. This is repulsive. We're going to have to bleep all of this out. Godspeed to that mother and to everyone else who is waiting on a poop, because that's when you know it's going to be bad. When you're waiting on it, when you're like, we haven't been there in a few days. Yikes. And last scroll from one sleep deprived mother to all the others out there, or those who have been there before. Does it get better? You know what's else ball right about now? She's tearing up. Hours of uninterrupted sleep. That's all I want. I'll even take. Okay. I feel this in my soul. I say any chance I get to talk to a new mom that I think sleep deprivation is one of the worst forms of torture. I still remember when Wyatt wasn't sleeping. And I would have almost like hallucinating during the day or completely forgetting things, or it was crazy. And you just want to sleep and your body and your brain needs sleep. And yet you're still running on autopilot because tiny humans. Finn, our youngest is 14 months, almost 15 months. She is doing a, much better. She was never a terrible sleeper. She's doing a great job. Nope. I didn't say that universe. I didn't say shit. I actually, I didn't say a thing. Let's ignore where I was headed and let's figure out how I'm sleeping. You know, how I can find out is my or her ring app. Now I love this because it not only tells you about, your sleep. It also tells you about your activity. It tells you about your readiness. I have mine sync to my natural cycles app, which is in conjunction with your aura ring readings. I found my aura ring to be incredibly helpful when I had little babies, because sometimes like we were just talking about with a little bit of like amnesia and hallucinating, you forget when you woke up for feeds or how long you were up. Let's see if I can do influencer. Thanks. Let's see. I can see when I was awake, uh, six hours and 22 minutes. I was out of bed at 4:00 AM for a little while. There was a dream situation I had to deal with. We had to talk about it out loud so that it can't come back. Everybody knows that we are a house that believes in sleep training, but we, uh, I just want to make sure that my kids sleep in their own beds. Cause I think that that bodes well for everyone's sleep. So yeah, I, we tried our best to sleep train. And for the most part, I think it worked. I will say, I do think it's very funny that at any given point, if your kid who was previously sleeping is not sleeping and you Google it suddenly sleep regression, we're going to sleep aggression. Oh, how old are they? My kid's not sleeping. How old are they? Nine months sleep regression, 15 months sleep regression, 18 months sleep regression. Oh, are they learning something new? Yeah. They're a fricking baby sleep regression. What? They have a sleep regression. Every time they learn a new skill. You're kidding. You're joking me. No wonder we're always in a sleep regression. What the heck? Well, that does it for doom scroll the week brought to you by aura ring. Moving on. There were so many questions from the real ones. Last week, we still have some bangers left. So let's get into a brand new edition. Ask me some things brought to you by door dash because ask me anything needed boundaries. First up from Rachel Fox. How can I be the best aunt ever to my niece? Don't have kids of my own. I don't know what to do. Oh, I know. Be present and let them get away with shit that their parents will not in a safe way. And, um, that about, sums it up. You are allowed, you have aunt, uncle, grandparent privilege. That's what I call it. You are allowed to spoil them to some degree. So, um, definitely just be present love on them and you can, you can spoil them a little bit because that's your right as cool. And also take her off of your sister's hands. Is it your sister? You're take, take, take, the job places. Yep. Next question from real one, Danielle, after pushing out babies, do you pee a little when you run and how do you stop that? So I feel privileged that I did not experience this. I would pee a little every time I stood up out of the car when I was pregnant with Bennett. Literally every single, when I hit six months on, I peed a little every single time I stood up out of the car. So there's that. Um, but I don't have an issue after pregnancies. Um, one of the things that I would recommend being a completely minimally informed non-medical opinion. Um, I think that means that you should do some focus on repairing your pelvic floor from Killian. Would Jason consider a large indoor cat like a Maine Coon? I love Maine Coons. I think they're beautiful. I think they're amazing. I love little tufts on the tops of their ears. They're incredible. I think they're a very dog-like cat. Um, I also think a rag doll is a very dog-like cat cause they're just fucking along for the ride. So, um, uh, the problem with both of those breeds is that we got long hair and I don't think Jason's going to go for that, but I'm willing to take a whack at it. And last one dream guests dead or alive. Oof. Where do I start? Uh, let me start with pink. She did an outstanding job hosting the Tony's and whenever she wants to come on a podcast, we will take her please. And thank you. Um, I don't even know guys, Rihanna, Beyonce, Dolly Parton, Quinta Brunson, because Philadelphia guys, I got, any on all of it. Okay. I'll take, just come through guys, come through. Okay. And you tell us what we talk about. I'll talk about anything you want. Come on. Come on. We can do it in person. somewhere, not terribly, far? I'll go somewhere. Okay, that's it. And that does it for Ask Me Some Things brought to you by DoorDash. Coming up, I'm about to be joined by Millie Bobby Brown right after these messages. That's why I use DoorDash, because when life gets crazy, DoorDash helps bring some order to it. Like this past week, when I needed to prove a point, so I DoorDashed ice cream for everyone but two of my children. I was trying to prove a point that there are consequences. And so when multiple people wanted ice cream, I ordered it for the ones who had their listening ears on. So DoorDash came in clutch with that one. Being able to offload a few to-dos and give a little more time to focus on yourself. And your family is huge. Order now. As a slightly disorganized type, who are we kidding? As a very disorganized type C mom with four kids and two dogs, it's important to carve out just a little bit of what I like to call nobody needs me time. One way I use that very small window of time these days is by doing a workout right on the Peloton app. I absolutely love the fact that if I know I only have 20 minutes, I can find a workout that fits that time. Perfectly. Peloton helps you unlock that joy through movement with their new cross-training Tread Plus powered by Peloton IQ. It provides intelligent strength coaching so you can stay in the moment. Peloton IQ sees every rep, reads every movement, and coaches you through it in real time. Plus, when you're racing against the naptime clock, you can get in your hot girl walk and strength training with one smooth spin of the swivel screen. No friction, no figuring it out, no interruptions. It's running and strength training without missing a beat. This is a great way to involve the instructors, but sometimes you can even just pop on there for a just ride or just run, and that is good enough. Let yourself run, lift, fail, try, and go. Explore the new Peloton cross-training Tread Plus at OnePeloton.com. The real ones may have noticed on this show over the years, I'm constantly wearing my Oura ring, and that's because I genuinely love it. I originally bought an Oura ring because I wanted to know about my sleep and how I was doing overall, and it has definitely allowed me to have insights into my life. Oura Ring 5 is the world's smallest smart ring, 40% smaller than the previous generation and more powerful than ever. I love the fact that my last generation Oura ring was so comfy, so comfy that when I wasn't wearing it, I felt a little naked. This ring is even smaller and lighter. It is itty bitty and cute. It is cute. Look at her. She cute. It helps me with tangible outcomes, better sleep, enhanced recovery, and greater stress resilience. Plus, it's so easy to sleep. It's so easy to sleep. I love it. Plus, it has up to one week of battery life. Charge once a week and never miss a night of data. And that, that is the most important part because I can remember. And it's available in six finishes. This is my gold. Look at her. She cute. Learn more about the world's smallest smart ring and discover how Oura can help you better understand your health at OuraRing.com. This is my, this is my all-time favorite podcast ever. Like I'm not even, I'm not saying that, like I watch every episode. I love it. So this is really like, I specifically was like, I need, like, if she will have me, I would love to go. Millie, this is not waterproof mascara. Stop. I know. I, I, it's funny. Like my husband will be like, Millie, you've already watched that episode. I'm like, I know. Stop it right now. Yeah. I'm a huge, I'm a huge. You're welcome. Thank you. Thank you. Also your babies. Oh my God. When they come on, I can not, they are so delicious. They love to insert themselves into any situation. That was me. That was me. And that's now a child actor. So I mean, our oldest, uh, recently had to do something for school where it was like, dress up as your future self. And she was like a rock star. And I was like, okay, but we could pick like a nerd. Or an artist because mostly because I had those things in the house as dress up items. And then it was a little more straightforward. And she was like, nope, a rock star. And then she dug her feet in and then she was a rock star. She wore a sparkly Cape to school. Oh, my father-in-law would be proud. He would be proud. I love that. Yeah, no, you have to like, that was me. I wanted to be Hannah Montana. And my parents had to break the news that that wasn't an actual job, which I was really pissed off about. I was like, I'm not going to be Hannah Montana. I'm going to be Hannah Montana. But then I found my own Hannah Montana way. There you go. Perfect. Okay, I'm going to intro you and we're going to get right into it. Okay. Let's see if I can read this morning. She's the Emmy nominated and SAG award winning actress, you know, from her hit show Stranger Things and her incredible mystery movie series, Enola Holmes. And we're all about to get to see the newest one because Enola Holmes three comes out July 1st, right on Netflix. She's also a fellow mom, and now she's officially not going to lie. It's Millie Bobby Brown. Welcome to the show. I just got chills. I'm so excited. We have so much to talk about. We really do. First of all, I have to tell you, because Stranger Things, fucking perfection, insanity, right? Like so good. My every single time I think of it, though, all I can think of is my six-year-old, now six-year-old, but when this happened, she was not six years old. Maybe she was. My husband, late at night, watching Stranger Things in the living room. Okay. And the next day, our six-year-old comes downstairs and she's like, I had a bad dream. Oh, no. I'm like, did you really? Yeah. I was sitting on the steps, watching Stranger Things. Yeah. I was sitting on the steps, watching the show. And I said, what do you mean? She was like, I was watching the show dad was watching. I said, well, what show was dad watching? She said, something scary. And I had to then text my husband, be like, what were you watching last night? And he was like, Stranger Things. And I was like, oh, well, so was Wyatt. And he was like, I had no idea she was on the steps behind me. Demogorgons are scary. That's horrific. It might take her a couple of years. Yeah. We're going to have to, we're going to have to come back around on that one. But now every single time I think of Stranger Things, I think of the, the mental image of her just sitting at the top of the steps, like. Sweet baby. That is that. I mean, yeah, that is, that is really tough. I, I wonder what, um, recently or like a long time ago. No, no, no, not that, not that long ago. Oh, okay. So it must've been like the last season, which I think so. I think quite scary. She, she caught a good one. I, to be fair, she's not, she doesn't like anything that's even like on the cusp of scary. Oh my God. So I love that. But it just cracked me up that like, she did not say anything to my husband who was sitting. I mean, we live in a split level. She's like seven steps away from him directly behind him and didn't say a word for her. She's like, and then she went back to bed, which is kind of amazing. I could never have done that as a child. I was really like, really, I still am very codependent with my parents and like have serious codependence. So I would be like, I'd, I'd have to make myself known. Yeah. She did it. And she told me this story. Are they like, are they, are they able to tolerate that? Like any of them? Our third would, our third would be like, I'm a hop in there. Well, speaking of my little muffins, uh, I want to officially congratulate you on your little muffin. Thank you. How are you finding motherhood so far? I love it. Like, and I think for, um, everybody was like, Oh my God, a 21 year old mom. And oh my gosh, how good she, um, I think what I'm having the most amazing time. Um, it's literally my husband and I say all the time, but it's like going from black and white to color. Like, it's just, everything feels complete and perfect in every way. And don't get me wrong. It's full of, you know, moments of like, Oh my, what do you, what do you do in this situation? Or, you know, um, but it's the most amazing thing ever. And I think raising just, it's a huge responsibility and raising, raising a daughter specifically. I know people were like, what about raising a son? It's like, no, I, I, of course every child is having like every child is a responsibility. However, I do think raising a daughter coming from my experience of being in a really pub, as a girl and as a woman, so frequently, I just take it very seriously to raise a girl that can be proud of who they are and be confident and embrace it. Just coming from my experience specifically, I think it was like really kind of my goal to just provide a world where she feels really safe and loved and nurtured and embraced. And that's what my parents did to me. So I think that's, that's just, you know, and that's why I am the way I am. because I was always just encouraged to speak my mind and be myself so my daughter the other day she's really into like just for no reason yeah and I do it back and then we start kind of having a little bit of a debate and I love it and Jake is like I love this because you know you're fully in her I'm not shushing her I'm fully embracing the fact that she's she's telling me something in a really passionate way I don't know what she's saying but um I really hope it's kind of life-changing uh now you mentioned that you have these moments of like what do I do yeah I want to be abundantly clear doesn't matter how old you are that's one of my biggest realizations of motherhood is that nobody knows what the fuck they're doing nobody knows we're all winging it and you're all figuring it out your baby sometimes looks at you and they're like they can smell fear I swear to god and it's like she's taking me on a thousand percent she's calling you on she's calling you on the carpet she's like yeah you seem like you don't know you seem like you've never seen a poop this green before what are you talking about and I'm that leads me right to my next question how many things have you googled so I when you hold back um I do I do I'm so proud of you thank you my husband says mill don't be a google warrior and I'm like you're right you're right and it takes everything in me to be like taking a picture and like searching it does this look good to you um and then I realized after about six months like I would say a good six months you're like anything with the baby it's it's anything is a free for it's you know that color like you know or um that weird like twitch that she does is just because something spicy you know you kind of are like oh I'm starting to understand that like anything goes they're all different and so you can't google something and hope that you're going to get the you're not like every baby is different and I think the key in that is use moms as your google like if you have mom friends just say it to them because they'll be like oh my god like they did that that happened to me that happened or actually something even weirder happened and you're like what the like I've never heard of that before so you're it really does help just talking to other moms I I'm not I wasn't huge on that in the beginning because I was like I don't want to compare because I'm gonna get stressed like if she's not doing something but actually it was it's the best thing for me and I love going to my music classes and like talking to the to the other moms about everything that I'm so proud of you for not searching it because do you still do that surely? No you're on oh number four a thousand percent the number of times I have googled now granted I have studied these charts I'm not kidding studied these charts the number of times I've searched them I have searched poop charts so many effing times I'm not I'm not this is not I'm not trying to be funny I truly have searched yes to see the color and the texture and to find out if it's normal or to find out what's going on yeah and finally on the fourth one like we've had we've had a kind of crummy stretch here with diapy rash okay but I know now I can't wait for me to say this on the podcast and the medical experts to get in the comments like you sound like an idiot you know what I'm gonna need you guys to think what would be helpful and you saying I'm an idiot it's not helpful yeah no uh when they're teething yeah and they have like so much excess saliva sometimes that can cause a little diapy rash that's true and diarrhea yes teething every symptom on the planet it's first of all trash yeah 100 but like if she's doing something even remotely weird they're like that's probably teething I'm like what but I have searched poop charts yeah repeatedly yeah it's really all about problem solving but the problem solving right now is like okay I know you really want to do that but we can't so let's problem solve let's figure out another solution for you to to be happy or problem solving in clearly you have a stomach ache what has triggered that now we need to now we need to open an investigation strings are coming out and Enola Holmes is coming in and I'm just like I'm feeling very passionate about figuring out what the fuck you've been training for this is what you're saying absolutely you know the one thing I will say um my my husband and I were talking about when he got his first phone I got my first iPad when I was like eight years old which I think is the same iPad one the iPad one and um I was saying oh my gosh what happens when I was like our daughter kind of what age is that you know and what does that look like in 15 years I don't know and I heard your take on the kitchen phone and I loved it I was like stealing that that's mine that's 100 you know there's a you know as with everything there's internet trolls that are like good luck I can't wait until she's 12 and everybody in her class has a phone and I'm like guys I don't think you understand I came from the house where my mom regularly said to me well I'm not so-and-so's mom yeah I'm not your friend I'm not here to be your friend I'm here to be your parent yeah that's the that's the house I was raised in yeah I've been trained for this shit yeah exactly period period period I don't by the way I don't care that Emily has a phone don't I actually don't care like it's not happening for you so you better get over it because you're gonna be sobbing the whole summer if that's yeah it's like I'm the kind of I'm 100 going to be and have been the daughter that has been like on the receiving end of like it's not happening so you might as well come to terms with it um and I feel it's being on and also you now like on the receiving end of what comes with having it's actually I'm protecting you from the exhaustion of receiving messages and calls and emails and awful bullying and hate it's truly it's the worst thing I carry around with me all day long it's terrible it's awful if I could go back to my LG flip phone I would I had an LG flip phone because they're the best recently for having just for fun yeah Kylie this is different you had it for like actual logistics I was like oh my god this is so nostalgic for everyone else let me hook it over my pocket I was like this is fun I'll have this and so yeah it took me ages to text people on it so I was like I can't do this anymore there is nothing more satisfying than hanging up a phone call by shutting a phone oh my gosh Divine by the way when my when my daughter and I we pretend to go on the phone I'll be like hello no uh-uh not today and my dad is like why why do you answer the phone and you're playing with her but you're immediately angry and I was like clearly that's how I feel every time someone calls me it's like nope uh-uh not happening not today and so I'm teaching her to basically say no no we're not doing that and he's like now I've so now I have to be like hello how are you oh I'm making up a scene in my head that's just not realistic and so I've really had to catch myself because I've learned that I answered the phone and I just immediately stopped berating well it's nice that it's nice that you came to that realization because I only came to the realization that I'm having very serious phone calls when our third was in the corner playing by herself no I cannot today I am not doing that today yeah I'm like she's who are you talking to yeah yeah her agent I mean she's negotiating a deal and this is it was outstanding yeah it was outstanding she was firm she held her boundaries and she did it with her whole chest and I'm here for it yeah I said that's my kid I also think it's the cutest thing when it's adorable I'm not interrupting absolutely not enjoy your playtime right yeah um now we've talked about the journey to motherhood in so many ways on the show but something we have not touched on a lot and I think it's so important to highlight is adoption if you're open to talking about it yeah you and your husband announced that you adopted your little girl did you always see adoption as part of your um journey to motherhood 100% yeah always always wanted to always wanted to adopt was always part of like my my childhood dreams every time I um uh was at home and I was you know five six years old my parents were like you had your baby dolls they were all adopted I never had any of them I said and I never pretended I was pregnant it's not because I don't want that I you know I hopefully one day that's in my future but for me adoption was always a part of my future adoption is love adoption is forever and like there's so many things that I have learned um uh before I took so many courses um like so many courses in adoption what it looks like on every other end of the spectrum on being uh you know a social worker I went to the hospital I went to the hospital I went to the hospital I went to the school to be a social worker for two years and then I switched to being a vet because I love animals but like truly I like love loved the aspect of adoption in my social workforces were like was everything and so so meaningful and important um and then I also learned what you know speaking to and reading a lot about being a birth mother and what that journey is so for me um my husband and I took a lot of time to focus on what that story and what that journey looks like and then we embarked it so it I think that there's there's it's multifaceted but yes it was always part of my journey now for anyone listening who's considering adoption as part of their family's future is there anything that you'd want to share with them every journey looks different um you know you wait you'll wait you waiting for the call is the hardest part and I always just say like you'll I love meeting other adoptive parents like it's my favorite because I just feel like I feel like we're one um and it's just a really different experience um however I just would always just encourage you to understand every journey is different don't compare yourself to other don't compare yourself to just like statistics and don't compare yourself to other families and um like your baby's out there and you'll find each other and um yeah I'm a big believer in that and I you know that's something that I prayed for every night and and you know I was just very very grateful that that our journey and our baby was out there and I and we found each other now did you know that phone call was coming no like do you you don't have any anticipation it is really just a cold call yeah your baby is waiting for you it's a it's a yeah it's a conversation and and you it's just really like for me I think it's very important to just always know like to trust your gut like for me my gut was like yeah that's it that's my that's my gut like and I think yeah I think that um it's just it's a very very it's just welcoming any you know any baby into your life my maternal instincts just kicked in I'm I'm an aunt and my maternal instincts like kicked in I was like this baby is like part like I will protect this baby with all at all costs um so being a mother my maternal instincts like meeting her was just like no this is this is everything that's your baby girl yeah and the bond immediately kicks in for me anyway it really did that's so beautiful this show is sponsored by liquid IV there's nothing I love more about summer than going down the shore I love that my kids get to experience what I like to refer to as the giant sandbox aka the beach the same way I did building sand castles absolutely digging a moat digging a 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moment checking Allstate first could save you hundreds on car insurance not checking the girls school emails before packing lunches apparently it's a half day and I didn't need to put energy into one more thing yeah so check Allstate first it could save you hundreds you're in good hands with Allstate potential savings vary subject to terms conditions and availability Allstate North American insurance company and affiliates Northbrook Illinois being a person is tough enough these days let alone being a parent that's why I use DoorDash because when life gets crazy DoorDash just helps bring some order to it like this past week when yet again we ran out of whole milk and you know Finn needs whole milk because well she's a bank and she'll get mad at me and she figured out how to yell now so she'll let me have it I'd rather just get the milk and DoorDash help with that came in clutch real life needs real relief that's why DoorDash is there for whatever you need whenever you need it life with kids is wildly unpredictable no matter how much parents try to plan there's always going to be chaos being able to offload a few to-do's and give a little more time to focus on yourself and your family is huge we all know life gets crazy DoorDash just helps bring a little order to it order now now one way I know you're showing your daughter how badass you are is by being a working mom and doing what you love yeah has she been able to see you in action on the set so I filmed a romance movie and she was on set with me every day and it was really funny because she would like watch the monitor and no no it was me she would no no knew it was me um and I just literally would like walk off of a tape grab her you know walk up off the tape grab her again take her outside go for walks any 10 minutes I had with her I was with her constantly um I did not miss a feed like I based my whole day around every single feed for her so and my husband the same so we were and he was producing the film so for us like we just tag-teamed constantly and then um and then the other the other day I popped her in um like her little stationary you know Walker thing and um I was like I wonder what I'd like I wonder what she'd do if I just put like Enola Holmes on so I put it on and she was like she's really not interested in screens like she doesn't care like she doesn't grip to a screen the way I think most children do and I I think it's great but it's also like you don't love my work but anyway so I like put the film on and she was like and then she just like she heard my voice and she just like it was my voice like I think I think mommy looks different sometimes but like my voice like stood she was like that's her voice and I think Enola really sounds like me so it was she was like oh that's mom and she couldn't take her eyes off the screen and but she did when every other actor went on the screen she was very she lost folks she was like I'm this is boring she's like I'm not here for you I know and I was like this is like Henry Cavill um but um I do think yeah she's like no I can't no um but I do think yeah I think it's it's a pretty uh it's pretty amazing thing to be able to I look back on my childhood and everything was filmed I think it's that's kind of an amazing thing to be able to say I've just I would I can't believe that I'm able to show her what I was like when I was 10 years old like I was an NCIS when I was eight years old I think it's hilarious to be able to be like that was me and to be able to reflect on that there are so many things even my husband's like you you were in that and I'm like yeah and then we watch it back and I'm just like I can't believe that I was so young and like you're you've got a six-year-old I mean I started when I was eight but just to think like she could you know that's possible is kind of it's kind of amazing and I think um to be able to have that for her to look at should she even be interested which I you know it's totally welcoming her not to be but but that is so beautiful that you basically have a time capsule yeah of you yeah that is that she will get to have forever yeah yeah I think it's so amazing myself like I really can't believe I get to just like do that um and some and by the way some of the things I want to die some of the things like some of the interviews I've done I'm like okay who needed to like brain her in like Millie shut up um and that also haunts me so it's really good intake my digital footprint is really you know I was a flat earther at like 12 and I'm like get off a live stream I'm just like what are we doing and now I'm like oh my God so yeah I had a phone and that was the problem with me is that I I definitely had a phone it sucks that like literally the whole world got to see it but at the end of the day I have really really thick skin and I just I don't I really have never cared like a lot of people have a lot to say about oh you got married too young you had a baby too young um you know you did this you did that why are you wearing that why do you look like that I don't care about myself I don't care what you say about me I'm very used to it it's like growing up and like you know with that you just it's second nature to you however I do have a problem about it happening to other young girls so that's where I really um I really just, I'm very lucky. I have a great support system and a, and a, and a healthier mindset about it, but I'm very aware that others might not. And that's where things have taken a turn for child actors. And so if I can, like, if I can have anything to do with it, I, I will always pull people out on that bullshit. It's funny because I feel very strongly the same way. I really, it, I just don't care what you say about me because at the end of the day, I know me, you, the people who are making the comments probably don't. Yeah. And I, but I do get, feel like viciously protective of other people. And like when people just want to be outright mean to others, I'm like, no, you can't do that. Like, I'd rather you say it about me than say it about them. 100%. Cause I'll wear it. Yeah. Proudly. At the end of the day, I probably don't even have enough time to read your bullshit. No. Literally. And also like all of these people, like what I, I was always like, oh my God, these are all men like saying all of these horrible things. And then one day I figured out like actually quite a few of them were women. And I was like, this is vicious. Like you are vicious. And I don't have time for angry women that just need to feel like they need to bring you down, especially when it comes to motherhood. I've never experienced anything like this. It's like, oh, you know, I could always deal with like the, oh my God, you showed your nipples. Like what a bitch. Like, and I'm like, whatever. Like, I don't care about that. But when you're like, you didn't put a hat on your baby and it was in, and I'm like, try pushing a hat on my baby. Come on. Come on. I dare you. Put a beanie on her. Put a beanie on her. She's literally like ba-boom. Like just stay in your own lane. Put a hat on your baby and put a sock in your mouth. Sorry. The English is coming out. I have said a number of times that within motherhood and here's, here's where people get very confused when I've talked about it previously is that I feel very strongly that one of the worst things is when people give unsolicited advice. And I'm not talking about the people who give advice that you've asked for or helpful advice. I'm talking about the people who look at you and in a very judgmental way say to you, that baby should have socks on. Yeah. And I'm like, Hey, I've actually, I came here with four pairs of socks in my pocket and she had two socks on her feet and we now have one sock. We came with five socks, five sets of socks. That's 10 socks, Cheryl. And now I have one sock. You tell me how a baby that has two feet is going to wear one sock. Yeah. And somehow now it's on her hand. I completely agree with you. I, when people are like when they offer, and I luckily feel like I've dealt with it mostly online, but when I do experience it in person, um, a lot of people will say things like, you know, they'll, they'll be like, Oh, shoot. That's a really big piece. Like, are you going to let her eat that? And I'm like, yeah, like I know what my baby can eat and what she can't, you know, like I will draw the line where I feel is necessary. And, um, and I, and I think it's very important. And what my in-laws and my parents taught me is just like, they don't offer me advice. They're very much like, they just let me live. They're really good about that. Um, and they just are like, but then they'll say like, Oh my God, I love the way you do that. And I'm like, okay. Like, I get that. I need validation. It's helpful to hear that I did something good, but they're very much like, we hated that. We're not going to then be the parents to do that. So I'm really happy as like traveled. That's so nice that that's your network, that that's who's closest to you is that you're experiencing that. Yeah. Cause I know that that's not the case for everybody. No, I luckily am in the same situation where my parents and my in-laws are very good about, like, well, you guys are the parents, you guys choose how things go. Yeah. And, but it is, it is crazy to hear the stories of people who, when you think, when I think about the like horror stories of people sharing unnecessary advice that it's, I think about it as strangers and some people are getting it in house. Now I do want to circle back to your new movie really quick because I do, it comes out on July 1st. Um, and so we got, we have a little bit of time here. And so I just was wondering if you can give away any spoilers and if you do, we'll just bleep them. Okay. What are you most excited for fans to see in Enola Holmes three? Oh my God. Okay. We're going to bleep it out. We'll bleep it. Tell me everything. Okay. I'm most excited for fans to see. I know. I'm really excited about that. I'm really excited about some of the new actors on the film and everybody kind of enjoying their characters. And also we filmed in Malta and I feel like it's a really, have you ever been to Malta, Kylie? No. Yeah. Yeah. Well, it is a very small Island, like these tiniest, tiniest minute Island, except it has the most amazing culture. Um, and it's very vibrant and it has like, you know, uh, we lived there for basically two months. Um, and it was just like an amazing experience. You go out, you could go and get Italian food, but then there's a lot of Arabic influence. Um, you know, there's a lot of French influence. It's like kind of amazing. It's like, it feels like a culmination of a lot of like Africa and, um, Europe and, and it, and it's really a cool place. And the accent is very, like very specific and niche and, um, it's a really colorful place. So I really, I really enjoyed that. And I really am excited for people to be like, take it, like, take us out of London for a moment and go to another place. I can't wait for the real ones to watch this. Yeah. Um, it just feels, I mean, I won't, I won't touch on your spoiler cause we're gonna, we're going to bleep it, but then you can bleep me too. Um, it, that feels so I love that. Yeah. Yeah. I think it's good because, because you, you, you know, people are very confused by the fact that me, Millie, I'm really, you know, I encourage all young women and young girls to find their thing, fight for what they believe in, stand up, you know, on their own two feet and do it on their own. And yet I will also encourage you to ask for help, to love others, to love deeply and, um, find your person. And if that person is your best friend, your aunt, your grandmother, my person was my nan, like she was my everything. And to find your other person in, in which Jake and I started in like a, in a, in a friendship, but, but then it, you know, grew. And, um, I feel like in a lot of ways, the story kind of runs parallel through my life and that I was feeling like I really wanted to be independent on my own and really do my own thing. And it didn't mean that I didn't have to do that, you know, without my best friend. Now, I do want to ask you some more about stranger things. The final season came out at the end of the year. How are you feeling now, several months later? Feeling really um, so I, oh my gosh, I don't know if I've done an interview, um, since then. I'm like, have I even spoken about it? Um, I basically, I cried for most of January. I had a bit, I had a bit of a, just a lull in who I was. Like it was very hard. It feels like grieving. Yeah. And I think what was hard is that I knew what, what was happening. I knew the end and I couldn't tell anyone. And I wore black the whole press tour because of the funeral of her. And yet I, um, I didn't feel it as much until everyone else found out and then feeling everyone else's grief made me like, whoa, like it was too much. And then I just immediately started cooling every cost member. Like, just like, we're like, you're still gonna like be in my life, right? Like I was really, really scared that I was like, it was over. And I just kept crying. I kept crying. That is like multiple layers of grief. Yeah. And then I finally felt like I came out of it toward the end of January. I was like, I had to, you know, I had to, cause I, I redownloaded Instagram because I really wanted to see what people were saying about Elle and like her story and, and then I had to delete it because it was making me too sad. And so I think toward the end of January, I, um, I had to stop talking about it, like in my random conversations, because it made me too emotional. And also now all I ever get is, I used to get, Oh, are you 11 from stranger things? And now I get, I believe I get people saying that they believe she's still alive. So it's a really beautiful, which also just evokes a lot of emotion for me. So what you guys created with stranger things, what, was incredible. I mean, you don't need me to tell you this. I'm pretty sure everybody tells you this, but what you guys created is incredible. And the great thing about it is, is that even though the show is tied up in an, again, a neat little bow, um, which is, I mean, I would say it's, well, maybe it's not tied up in a neat little bow, uh, because you still get that wonder of what is, but you guys created something that is so incredible that evoked so many emotions out of people that had people like on the edge of their seat, waiting for the episodes to drop. Like you guys did that. And it went all the way through, which I think is such an incredible accomplishment. I think so many times you've seen a show that sort of like gets a big fan following and then sort of like, it draws out so long that people don't even know it. Yeah. Well, I didn't watch that last season or I didn't watch this. People were on the edge of their seat until the minute you guys finished. And that's so impressive. Yeah. I mean, the fans, it's crazy to think that the fans stayed for that long and were so dedicated despite the years that were sometimes in between the seasons. But I truly, I mean, I can't like, I can't, I think the, again, it's just, it's the cost. Like we together, everybody individually had such an important role to play. And, um, you know, I almost all the time meet people that are like, I love this character because they made me feel like brave. And, um, and now I want to be this and now I want to be this. And I think it's really cool. And then I, majority of the time get young, young girls. Um, and I'm talking, you know, sometimes six, seven years old. Um, and I, I truly was like, um, if they come up to me and they'll say, I, can I be a superhero like you? And I'm like, that's like what you see me as, as a, you know, and then I'm like, it's kind of amazing because for me, like, there's such a, like, I'm such a, like, I, my character is so layered and it's so complex. And is she really a superhero? And, and they're just, that's all they see. And I think it's really cool to be able to, to be that for, for some, you know, young girl that, you know, is watching it probably because she's not meant to be. And she's on the stairs like Wyatt, but it's, that's what she sees. And that's cool. But that's so, it's really cool to think that, and I don't know if you feel this way, but having young girls, when I get to see, like, even just they're like my nieces, when they interact with them, who are like teenage girls, the different women in their life who interact with my daughters, who they see and idolize and, and see what they do and how they impact their lives. Like, that's so exciting for me. Yeah. And you get to do that on like this very high level. Yeah. Does having a daughter of your own almost drive that home even more of like, I know that you've always been like a women supporting women and making sure that like, we're uplifting other women, which I cannot get behind enough, but it does, does that like, do you feel the weight of that, that you are influencing young women in a way that I would, personally love to have someone being a role model for my kids? Yeah. I think I always felt it. Like I felt the responsibility of that. Sometimes it was great. Sometimes it was really overwhelming because I was like, I feel like I can't make a mistake. However, now having a daughter, I'm like every child I meet, I see her in them. I cannot thank you enough for coming on. This has been an absolute pleasure. It's been an honor. I know we just talked about it, but I do have to say you are an incredible example of women supporting women of motherhood. I hope you fucking put your noise canceling headphones on and block out all the haters because that thick skin is doing well for you. And, um, you shouldn't listen to any of the hate because you are incredible. I'm so, so happy for you and your husband and your little baby girl. And I wish you guys the best. Um, Kylie, this has been an honor. Like seriously, I love, I love your podcast and I'm nobody probably ever does this to you, but I just want you to know, like your transparency, the way you are, like I can tell you you're speaking from the heart and you're not saying things to be just a certain way in the world. Like your podcast, I feel like is a really great outlet. And I feel like when I'm watching you and other guests, you just allow people to fully speak their truth and who they are. And you just, you're not jaded. And I like love that. And I love that. I feel like you're this podcast is that, so I think we need more of you in the world. So thank you for having me. Thank you so much. Uh, and remember real ones to go watch Enola homes three on Netflix on July 1st. And that's it for this episode of not going to lie. You can find even more clips for my longer conversation with Millie on my YouTube channel on more shit Monday. I'll say any guesses on our guest hint. It's not who you think it is. Comment. And we'll see if you're right. Follow us on social media at NGO with Kylie for clips throughout the week. Listen and subscribe wherever you get your podcast. Not going to lie as a wave original brought to you by door dash. Thanks again to the real ones for tuning in wave. That's why I use door dash because when life gets crazy, door dash just helps bring some order to it. Like this past week, when yet again, we ran out of whole milk and you know, Finn needs whole milk because, well, she's a tank and she'll get mad at me and she figured out how to yell now. So she'll let me have it. I'd rather just get the milk and door dash help with that came in clutch. That's why door dash is there for whatever you need, whenever you need it. Being able to offload a few to do's and give a little more time to focus on yourself and your family is huge. Door dash just helps bring a little order to it. Order now.