Kylie & Leanne Morgan on Perimenopause Secrets, An Ode to Donna Kelce & Grandparent Boundaries | Ep. 85

pink panther is here coach and spotify are teaming up to bring music and style together and they want you to be part of it grab your friends and head to the tabby tour hitting cities around the country with live performances from special artists exclusive experiences and personalized products and discover custom playlists on spotify but just for you based on who you are and how you listen live your story with coach learn more at coach.com finding a doctor is hard enough finding the right doctor even harder someone who takes your insurance has an available appointment when you need one and feels like someone you can actually open up to that's where zocdoc comes in download the zocdoc app to search and compare doctors by specialty insurance and availability read real patient reviews find the right fit for you and book instantly because getting seen by the right doctor matters zocdoc ready to be seen you Sock doc app today for probably three days ahead of my period I eat like a garbage disposal wait why would you not just have hubby shave you I let my husband give me a lineup I'm sorry what your little uterus all right I talk about nasty stuff though Kylie I do love the word butthole I think butthole is so funny perimenopause it is rough it lasts 10 years perimenopause last 10 years so dumb not gonna lie I don't sound my best and that's because I was trying to make sure that Trevor Lawrence couldn't call a single play effectively yeah I was also trying I mean 109 section 109 in that stadium that stadium really we showed up we did our best and I'm so pissed about it let's get this podcast started welcome back to a brand new episode of not gonna lie a wave original brought to you by Invisalign I'm your host Kylie Kelsey still crashing out about the end of last week's Eagles game I fear we don't have time for me to fully crash out so I'm just I'm gonna leave it at that I will ride it's on dawn for Wawa but I might have to draw the line at sushi guys we don't have to do everything let's cut that out just a thought I think that I the key word here is that Wawa is testing sushi in the Philly suburbs I think we should just mark that one to fail and move on and also a supporter of all women's sports especially when they're played in my own backyard that's right tonight we are headed to the US women's national team game versus Spain because it's right here in Philadelphia We're recording this a few hours before the game, so here's my best attempt at some pre-recorded reactions. Congrats to Team USA. That goal by Ashley Sanchez and or Mallory Swanson was ridiculous. I mean, I can't believe I finally got to meet Trinity Rodman and her boyfriend, Ben Shelton. Trinity Rodman is hilarious and a fucking boss. So the ladies from Spain. Well played. And we'll see you next time. Maybe we'll meet up at the World Cup. Great. Okay. Nailed it. Coming up on today's episode, I'm going to talk about this viral TikTok about hiding period products from men. Plus I was just in London. So I'm going to talk about Jason's Eagles booth debut and bringing EAF abroad. After that, I'm going to be joined by a hilarious standup comedian and actress. She's a friend of the family and a fellow mom, Leanne Morgan. It's so ridiculous. You have to stay tuned. It's, I love her. I just want to, I want to package her up. I want to take her because if I do that, she said she would throw in a load of wash and start the crock pot. So how about that? Seriously stick around. Before we get to all that, a quick couple NGL announcements, rapid fire style. Is it actually rapid fire or is it medium fire? Sure. Let's see. First announcement, no new NGL episode next week, but we'll be back on October 29th for our annual Halloween episode. Queen Emma wants to know if I'm going to wear a costume. Maybe. Do we have a very special guest? I don't know. Maybe. Next, the reason we don't have an NGL episode next week is because we're officially back in production for FAFO and the NGL team is on the move. We have three different shoots in a matter of days. Some hints because I'm really good at being subtle. Think Christmas, like as Christmassy as it gets even. I should start stretching now. I actually, I should have started stretching six months ago, but here we are. We'll see how it goes. The next episode, your clue is a Madonna mic. See, cool people would say a Madonna mic. I would say a McDonald's mic because my sister and I used to use that to pretend we were working at a drive-thru. Whatever. And last but not least, your Queen Emma approved clue, Cleveland Heights. It's that simple? We're going that simple? I love that. All right. That's it for announcements. We'll see you next time. Bye. Because we got to get to some of the real ones. Best work yet with a fresh edition of Real One Comments of the Week. First of all, we hear you loud and clear that we absolutely need to have Sirus back as our NFL correspondent. We agree with you. We know that. But you guys were in the comments. Someone said, if we don't get to keep Sirus, we mutiny at dawn. Not really, but I know many of us will be heartbroken. Correct. Including me. Someone else said, I didn't know Kylie and Sirus was. Perfect. Perfect. Perfect. Someone said, my nurse was like, girly, why are you not pushing? And I finally said, I'm scared to fart. And she goes, oh, honey, that's silly. And raised her leg and farted so loud. It was what I needed. And I swear, I laughed that baby out. Nurses are angels. Well done. The next comment said, probably the only downfall to my water birth was having to watch my poor midwife fish turds out of the water with a cup. You know, the things I never thought about. I didn't even think about that. So that's a fun new adventure. That is going to live in my brain. I really am so happy that I opened up this conversation about shitting and labor because you guys know farts are funny around here. And also, you can't be poop shy when you're trying to bear down and have a human being exit your body. We can't. We just can't. That baby's coming out, come hell or high water. And if that means that we're pushing hard enough that everything exits, peace. Gotta go. And we also got multiple comments. Like this one. Wait, why would you not just have hubby shave you? I let my husband give me a lineup even if I feel lazy, no pregnancy needed. I'm sorry, what? I'm gonna actually, I'm actually gonna take a surprising angle here on this one. Speaking strictly about the body parts that you can see on my husband, that you guys can see on my husband. You think I'm gonna let a man who has a full beard try to navigate lady lips? Are you kidding me? With a, with a razor? Guys, what? Immediately, no. He doesn't even, he doesn't even clean up his own beard. And you want me to, huh? No. That's an interesting take, but I'm going a big fat hell no on that one. I literally cannot wrap my brain around that. The fact that someone wrote this as a suggestion is kind of wild. That's ballsy, Christina. I respect it. I don't agree with it. That's it for real one comments. Keep them coming. Let's keep it moving with a little doom scroll of the week brought to you by CVS. First up on doom scroll, apparently there's a trending TikTok conversation right now about how your husband or boyfriend should quote, never know you're on your period. Thankfully, this queen is having none of this queen. I'm at the clip, please. So there's this conversation going around right now about some, someone saying that, you know, your man should never know when you're on your period. Um, and I just want to let you know that if you have to hide the fact that you're bleeding for seven days from that man, he's not the one for you. As a matter of fact, he doesn't even like you. Why is this a conversation? I'm genuinely concerned. Y'all are dating people who you can't tell them when you're on your period. Do you know how many changes a woman's body goes through in a month? Right. And do you know how many changes a woman's body goes through on her period? Do you know how many emotional changes she's going through? How many physical changes and problems and stuff that she's going through? And you want me to keep that from the person who's supposed to be my comfort for the sake of what? What? For who? Bitch, you got off scot-free. With a wiener and balls. Okay. You are fucking cruising through life with the only severe threat being if some hits those balls. And you're going to fucking try and tell me that when I, my entire uterus evacuates itself once a month for six, seven days that I'm supposed to fucking be, I'm supposed to be just coy about the whole situation. Go fuck yourself. Let me tell you about what happens in our house. For probably three days ahead of my period, I eat like a garbage disposal. I mean, you lit, I could eat us out of house and home. Okay. I, there is not a single thing that I lock eyes with where I'm like, no, I couldn't. I could. And I will for three days. And if I do not eat everything in sight, sometimes, even if I do, I am mean, mean for absolutely no reason out of the blue, not the whole day. I'm not mean the whole day, but every so often she comes, out, run, run. It being me, a fully aware it's because now I'm not in it right now. Run. And then after I mean, I might cry about it. Here's the deal. We're on a roller coaster and your man is supposed to ride it with you because your partners, you're in it together. Why are we hiding our periods? Why don't you pop them on a tens machine and see if they're still sensitive about it? Okay. You give them pseudo period cramps, pretend period cramps, and then you find out if they feel sensitive about it still. Okay. These men who want you to hide your period from them, or like that you feel inclined to hide your period from, they've never had a cold, and it shows. Okay. They've never had a sneeze or cough. You know exactly where I'm going with this. You know where I'm going with this. You're on day two of your period. You sneeze or cough and you like, good luck. Good luck. That's, that's a trust exercise. Hiding that from men. You're doing too much for them. You need to do less. Also, what happens when they have daughters. Next scroll is a candidate for, you know, what's fucked up. You know, what's fucked up. A gate agent tried to tell this mom she needed her infant with her in order to board with her breastfeeding equipment. I'm so sorry. What? But, but why would be traveling with an infant? You still have to pump it's breast pump parts with the, with the bag. The flight's not even, it's still 90 seats on the flight too. So I'm not understanding, like, what's the difference of checking it or not? Like if it's a medical parts, you can check everything in there. It's all nursing stuff. It's, it's, it's breast pump and like parts. That's, that's just like, that's what your policy says online. I agree. It says, so if you are traveling with an infant, but in this case, you are not traveling with an infant. So that wouldn't even make sense if I was traveling with an infant. I wouldn't even know what to do. Queen Emma really likes to rage beat me. She enjoys it a lot. It excites her soul. Someone commented and said, quote, you are not traveling with an infant. Okay. But I'm traveling with my boobs. As someone who has traveled away from my children while I was still breastfeeding, although it was for a short period of time, anyone who has been in the breastfeeding trenches knows that for a bare minimum supplier, like myself, if I do not pump every three hours on the dot, sometimes more frequently when I am away from a breastfeeding baby of mine, I will lose supply. There isn't like, there is no ifs, ands, or buts about it. I will lose my supply. Like I will not have it anymore. The idea that you are only allowed to travel with a pump with an infant is a wild take. Now I'm hopeful. I'm hoping that the person, the employee that this woman was speaking to later on walked away from this instance and realized how wrong they were. That being said, this is why we should continue talking about breastfeeding. This is why we should continue talking about pumping. This is why we should continue having all these conversations of things that women are experiencing and not necessarily like putting, people on blast, but making sure that it is a widely discussed topic so that when things like this happen, if this gate agent is not going to hear out this mom, then someone standing by, man, woman, whoever, hears this and says, hey, like it actually makes more sense to have the pump if she doesn't have a baby with her, because I would assume she's going home to a baby that needs the milk that her body is making. Ridiculous. God, that's horrific. Ugh, annoying. Next up, Queen Emma is telling me I might want to grab some tissues for this one because this message fam left for Asia Wilson after winning her fifth MVP might get me. Queen Emma, the clip, please. I just can't put into words how special you are to not only me, but the aces, the city of Vegas. Like when you do what you do, you change so many people's lives and it's so impactful and I'm blessed to be a part of it. You have five and honestly, I'm here to gas you up every single day. I don't care what anybody else says. You're the greatest of all time. I want you to know it will always be celebrated. I will always celebrate you. I will always be the one to be like, yeah, that's my wife getting the fifth MVP. First of all, congratulations, Asia, on your fifth MVP. Boss ass shit. Boss shit right there. God, I love that so much. Some stats. No other player in WNBA has won it more than three times. Average 26 points and 9.4 rebounds per game. Only eight players in the NBA, NFL, MLB, NHL, and WNBA have won five or more MVPs in their career. Only eight. Eight. Michael Jordan, Wayne Gretzky, Barry Bonds, Peyton Manning, Kareem Abdul-Jabbar, Bill Russell, Gordie Howe. First of all, something to note. I would like to call it out because all of those athletes that I just named men. Asia fucking did that. She fucking did that. Okay. We called her the goat when she was on last year. Now even more awards. Okay. She's not done is what she said. She's got shit to do. Also, can we just have a moment for how cute Asia is? Was that not the sweetest phone call? That was such a nice message. Guys, you really, that's, God, I love that so much. That is so good. Asia, forever grateful that you spent your time coming on this podcast. I still have your amazing shoes here in studio. If you ever want to teach me how to get some use out of them, I welcome it. But I would love to hear from you guys. If you ever want to teach me how to get some use out of them, I would love to hear from you guys. If you ever want to teach me how to get some use out of them, I would love to MVP. That's fucking insane. Outstanding. Maybe we should get them on to do the newlyweds game. Should we get them on to do a newlyweds style game? Let's try. Asia and Bam, if you want to come on, let's do it. All right. That's it for Doom Scroll of the Week brought to you by CVS. Leigh-Anne Morgan is coming up. But first, the return of places. Kylie has some business being brought to you by Invisalign. This past weekend, the real ones may have seen I was in London for the Eagles-Jaguars game. And in an attempt to heal, I'm not going to talk about the actual game again, because yikes. Am I right? Yuck. Boo. Guys, we were so close. We were so close. Part of me is like, we were so close. And the other part of me is like, it shouldn't have even been that close. You know what I'm saying? What I will say, let me get, let me be positive. I was very proud we were able to do an EAF All Abilities Clinic in London. And although I did not make it out there because I couldn't be out there that early, it meant that 80 athletes from the London area were able to participate in an All Abilities Football Clinic. And while we were there as an organization, an amazing announcement was made that Jeffrey Lurie was donating $670,000 to support London-based autism research. These types of collaborative efforts are incredible. It's an opportunity for us to not only share what has been found in the research that EAF has funded other places, but it also allows us to show an investment in other communities that are welcoming to American football. I also went to an Eagles takeover at Trafalgar Square. They were silly and let me have a microphone in the middle of a turf. So of course I gave them an Eagles chant. I got to meet a number of people. It was such a great time. As much as I loved the being behind the scenes. It is so much fun to meet really fellow Eagles fans because we get to cheer on the same team. And that's a bonding experience. Everyone knows that. Someone did ask me why I was not wearing my Princess Kiana jacket in London. And that's because I don't accept that name. So how about that? Yeah, I was not going to encourage that nonsense. I was at the game, of course, to support the birds, but it was also Jason's first time in the booth calling an Eagles game specifically. I did get to go up and see him working in the booth. I'm impressed with his stamina for standing. That's a development. And also just really impressed with his knowledge. I get to hear how incredibly thoughtful and calculated and studied he is when it comes to football. But getting to hear how he explains it to other people, getting to hear him talk to other people, getting to hear him talk to other people, getting to hear him share his knowledge of the game is so much fun to listen to. But also that's mine. Anyway, that's it for Places Kylie Has Some Business being brought to you by Invisalign. I'll be right back with Leanne Morgan. That's right. I said Leanne Morgan. Yep. You guessed it. No business, but we'll be back right after this. Queen Emma, I don't have anything in my teeth, do I? Good. Because that was a trick question. I know there's nothing in my teeth. I floss all the time. Good gum health. I want an excuse to show off my smile because today's episode is brought to you by. Invisalign. Look at her. She did that. Ta-da. In college, I got Invisalign aligners because I wanted to actually look in the mirror and feel confident in my smile. I think that a smile is one of the best things that you can possibly have. I think one of the best things that you can put on is a smile. I'm not just saying that because it's like some old quote or something. I'm saying it because I truly believe that when you can smile and really mean it, like when it goes all the way up to your eyes because you're confident and you're happy and you're feeling joy, who doesn't want to see that? More importantly, I'm not saying that because I'm not confident in my smile. I'm more importantly, who doesn't want to feel that? Well, let's talk about something beyond how your smile looks, taking care of it. And since we've already established that I take flossing very seriously, this part deserves a little attention. Invisalign aligners straighten teeth, making it easier to brush and floss, reducing plaque and lowering the risk of cavities and gum disease. I have to be really careful to make sure that I'm keeping up with my oral hygiene because I have little muffins that watch me and I need to make sure that they're modeling that same care for their own teeth. Back in college, I was thinking about how I was going to be able to look. Now I appreciate that there's more to it than that. Look at her. Look at her. Ooh, she's cute. Look at her. Wow. And if you're thinking about starting your smile journey, make sure you're getting Invisalign aligners. Look for the star flower logo on every aligner so you know you're getting Invisalign, backed by experience and trusted by doctors. Find an Invisalign doctor near you today. It's October. The girls are in school. The temperatures are dropping. So you know what that means. Invisalign aligners are the best. It's germ season. Yuck. We already got hit. This is the beginning of the year, guys. The beginning of the year of illness that won't quit. The good thing is the CVS Health app helps me handle my healthcare needs all year round. And it's especially helpful for busy parents or caregivers because it makes the whole healthcare experience simpler and more convenient. The CVS Health app helps me get in and out of the pharmacy fast. I can pop in, pull up and scan my digital barcode at the pharmacy counter, and they know just what to grab for me. Plus, I can stock up on tissues, hand sanitizer, and more. I love a good car hand sanitizer. It makes me happy when everybody gets in the car and then we do our hand sanitizer. You know what that is? And my kids will tell you. It's the gateway to when you can wash your hands. So while I'm getting my hand sanitizer, I'll pick up some more hand soap because the one gets you to the other. And you can save money and earn rewards with extra care. Unlock in-store and online savings. No coupon needed. I also love that I can refill track and manage my money. I can save money and earn rewards with extra care. I can change my prescription needs anytime. The CVS Health app lets you check your prescription status on the go and it'll tell you the moment your prescription is ready. Go to cvs.com slash app to learn more and download the app now. She's the hilarious stand-up comedian you know from her Netflix specials, her Emmy award-winning show Leanne, and her viral clips about menopause, marriage, a certain hot pink snowsuit that was apparently very itchy. She's a fellow mom, a friend of the family, and now she's officially not going to lie. Leanne Morkan, welcome to the show. Thank you, my darling, for having me. I feel so special. I'm so excited to have you on. I think for so many reasons, but one reason in particular is that, like I said, friend of the family, you know my sweet, lovely mother-in-law, Donna Kelsey. Honey, that Donna, I love her. She came to one of my, she has been so supportive of me. She's been to two shows, two different tours, and she came and watched an episode of Leanne being filmed on Netflix. That's so much fun. I know she's a doll. She talks about you all the time in a very sweet way. We have talked about your clips online and the stand-up that you do. It's, we love it. We love, love, love her. Thank you, my darling. Well, that thrills me. In knowing her, what's something you would say that people might not know about her or don't give her enough credit for? Very, very witty and funny. She's very funny. She is. Yes. And in a dry way. But she said to me when she was shooting, I mean, I was shooting that series and she was doing Traders. And she, that's why she was in LA. And she goes, I'm going to take care of, she said, Kylie and Jason have to go to Milan. Was it Milan that y'all were going to, to correspond for the Olympics and all that? And she goes, me and Kylie's mom are going to take care of these four little girls. She goes, pray for me. Yep. And she was so tickled to do it, but she was just worried about, you know, that's a lot of babies, but they were going to tag team. Every single day I wake up, I'm like, somebody pray for me. So like her stepping, her and my mom stepping in to do that, it, it was an impressive feat. And we came back and the girls were so happy and they kept talking about their time with DeeDee and Nana and it was like the best of the best. The baby was how old though? How old was the baby? Finn was maybe, uh, 11 months old. And she also had just gotten past the phase where she didn't like anybody else. It was for nine months of that child's life. It was like, it is mom or it is no one. So we had just gotten over that hurdle and I was sprinting for the airport. Sprinting. I wanted like one night of not being touched. So then I was like, I went on a trip with my husband. Did you take all these kids and put them in the van? Not on purpose, but every, every single one of them has gone through a phase of like the only way I'm sleeping is if I'm next to you, which I am outspoken about being against. I don't like that idea. I got married to sleep next to my husband. I don't, I didn't, I didn't sign up to sleep next to you. Um, and they share rooms. So it's not like I'm, I, I, they all have a buddy. And so I, but I, they've all gone through a phase. Our oldest was right away. She was like, I'm sleeping with you and there's nothing you can do about it. That was interesting. And then we sleep trained her. It was one of the worst experiences of my life, but guess what? She's never come back in our bed unless for a bad dream, a one-off for a bad dream. And I can take that. And how old is she? She's seven. Seven years old. Honey, you've had a busy, is your little uterus all right? I don't think so. Thanks. I can't imagine she's doing great because we have seven, five, three, and one insanity. But isn't that darling, you know, my little mama Lucille is from five girls, four biological, and then adopted a fifth one. And my, and it's so sweet to see those sisters, you know, that many girls excited about it. I tell everybody when we found out we were having our second girl, I was like, oh my gosh, I think we're going to get all daughters. I always thought I would get to meet a little version of my husband. And then by the time we had our third girl, I was like, wait a minute, this is outstanding. I got the, the hand-me-downs packed in the basement. Everybody can use them. I got all the pink toys. Those are great hand-me-downs. There was nothing I had to change. And I never got peed on changing a diaper. Right. And that's, that's a badge of honor. I'm they get to be grown. My girls take care of me and they tell me what to do. We go to Costco and they go, that's too much, mom, put it back. And I'm like, it's my money. But they tell me now, they treat me like a little child, but I kind of need it, Kylie. You know, I'm busy. And that the middle, the baby is my makeup artist and travels with me and takes care of me, is on set with me, is in the union for makeup for television. She's with me all the time. And she tells me what to do. I'm becoming like Mariah Carey, who I'm a big fan of. But you know, you see Mariah Carey and two men are carrying her everywhere she goes. I'm thinking they're going to start carrying me. You're like, Tess, pick me up. Pick me up, Tess. And she's strong enough to do it. And then this middle one, Maggie, to make sure that she'll say to Chuck, did you call Nana? Does Nana know what we're doing for Easter? These girls will tend to y'all. That's what I need. I'm waiting for the day where I get to flip the switch of my brain off and then they're just like, mom, you're coming to our house. We're hosting. This is what's happening. This is when you need to be there. And then I have the best example of a grandmother in my mom. Donna's obviously amazing, but my mom lives 10 minutes from us. She is with our girls right now. I cannot wait to do for our daughters what my mom has done for us. That kind of stuff is so exciting when you have daughters, because my mom was told by her mother-in-law, a daughter's a daughter all her life. A son's a son until he takes his wife. None of mine are leaving. I know. I know. Now, I am very, and I grieved when Charlie died, when Charlie Morgan got married. And I love his wife. And she's like another child to me, another daughter to me. And if I buy mine something, I buy her something. She is precious. And a good mama and loves my son. I'm lucky. They live five minutes from me, honey. And I get to see these grandbabies all the time. And she, I talk to her every day. I'm very lucky because I, even though he has his family and all that, I'm very much involved with her. And she lets me do whatever with these babies. And I'm very lucky. Not everybody has that. Well, it does. That does bring me to a clip I saw where they were talking about their baby. And you had to make a correction. And that correction was what? Our baby. Now, first of all, rude that they would have tried to exclude you. I know they were going, their baby. I was like, what are y'all talking about? This is our baby. Yes. Just because you're bringing into the world doesn't mean it's not, it's not everybody's right here. Now, have, I call that, the aunt, uncle, grandparent privilege. Do you get that grandparent privilege now? Yes, honey. I've got bunk beds, cribs. I've got all diapers, pull-ups. I've got a whole closet with clothes that have got, you know, golden retrievers on them, dinosaurs, sharks, because I've got two boys, three and five. And I've got toys and I buy too many toys and I try to, you know, honor what they're asking and not go. And I've got toys and I buy too many toys and I try to, absolutely not. So, but I can't, I love a vehicle, honey. If I see like a new Jeep's out or a tractor. They're riding in it. I got to get it. Now, do they know that you're famous? Okay. I finally, somebody, they told me the other day that my oldest, my five-year-old was with his little friend and he said, they overheard them talking and he said, Hey, you want to hear something cool? And that little boy went, yeah. And he goes, my grandmama's. On TV. And little boy said, I know. And he went cool. Right. And I had no idea that he knew. And I think because I'm on Netflix, like trash truck, they watch trash truck and I don't even know what all it is and Danny go and all that, that they see grandmama up there too. And so I think it, and my son did a guest spot on my series was in the, in the background and the girls were too. And Chuck Morgan's got a line. He's in one of the episodes, plays the bartender at the VFW. But I think they showed my grandson like, look, there's Danny and he's on the grandmama's show. So I don't know, you know, what he really, but he, but he told his little friend. He's bragging about you. I know I could blow my eyes out. I'll have to buy him up. I'll have to buy him a truck. A new vehicle. A new vehicle, a new battery operated vehicle. I did actually see you do not. You do not curse in your standup. No. Do you curse in real life? Under my breath. If Chuck Morgan makes me mad, I don't put it out there, but you know, Kylie, I, I, I made a decision. Well, and I really just don't write that way, but it, I grew up in a house where you did not use language and it's my great grandmother. We called her big mama and she was tiny. I wanted to be called big mama. And my kids were like, no, cause you're big mom. That doesn't make sense. But she was little bitty and darling and sweet. And there was something that you just did not talk ugly. We, they called it in the South. Don't talk ugly, you know? And so, but, and I did in the eighties, honey, when I'm, I probably said a lot, but, um, but in my, when I started doing standup, I just, I really don't write that way. It doesn't come out that way. But also, I was a mama. I got started when Tess was 18 months old. I worked in my first comedy club. I was doing it before then, but like at the Rotary. I'd take a baby to Mom's Day out and then get paid $50 to go do a little something at the Rotary. But when I really got to do clubs and call myself a stand-up, she was 18 months old. And she's going to be 29 in January. And I just thought, I never want to say anything that I didn't want them to say. Sure. But I talk about prostituting myself to their daddy so they could have nice shoes. I talk about nasty stuff, though, Kylie. I talk about real stuff. Oh, I know. You know, I talk about my body, Chuck Morgan, having to do nasty things in a hotel room. That's why I don't want him to retire, by the way. I cannot have him on my butthole. I do love the word butthole. I think butthole is so funny. I did see you recently. You said that that's one of your favorite words. Oh, love it. It is universal. I mean, it's universal. It can be used in many different facets. It can. I like it. I do, too. I think, was that Amy Poehler made me? She likes the word butthole, too. It's a good word. So I do. I talk about all the stuff I've had to do with their daddy. You know, it makes it easier. On everybody. If a man, you know, that's how they show love. And just get that out of the way so everybody can have a nice vacation. You know, and everybody. And I've talked about having to do nasty stuff before church so that we can go eat chicken after church. You know, because my little children love chicken. Chicken tenders. And so, yeah, I talk about my body. You're so selfless. I know. I'm very open. And I'm very. I've always been out there. My sister will say, you don't have to tell everybody everything, Leanne. Like right now in my new hour. It's kind of more fun that way. I think it's fun. Is that what you're telling right now? Time of our lives tour? Yes. The real ones can check it out. The dates and tickets at LeanneMorgan.com. But that's the tour you're currently on. Is that what you're telling people? Yes. You're telling them everything. Because I want them to know that I'm having the time of my life. And I think I really and without sounding sappy, there is a there. We're having a moment. Women that are my age. And it used to be that I have more women tell me that used to be like you feel like after 40, nobody cares about you. You're invisible. You can't. You know, it's it's over for you. And now 60 is the new 40, I would say, or new 30. And everybody's going and doing honey and starting, you know, second careers and and doing the dreams that they've always had that they felt like they couldn't do. And and people tell me that they are inspired by what's happening. And I think that's what happened to me because I've done stand up for 27 years, honey, and 20 of it. I couldn't get arrested. And then this happens to me in my early fifties and I'm in movies and I'm doing crazy mass that I can't even imagine. Like I'm in a movie with Glenn Powell that will be out in February 2027 called The Comeback King. And you're talking about a doll baby. Have you ever met him? I've not. And he's athletic and he loves sports. I know he's if he hadn't met your husband. I know he'd be tickled, but he is precious. And it's like somebody you went to high school with, darling. But anyway, I do feel like that I'm having a moment and that the time of our lives, I want everybody to feel like we're having the time of our lives. It's not over. You know, we've still got a lot of life left in us. I feel good. Look at Donna Kelsey, what Donna Kelsey's doing. I know. She said to me the other day, I told her, I go, who are we, Donna? Well, how did this happen? She? She goes, I say that to myself every day, all the things she's getting to do. I mean, it's just crazy, you know, so fun. How proud are your kids of you at this point getting to watch your journey of like really grinding out doing stand up for that long and then having this explosion, what I would describe as like an acknowledgement of how amazing you are and that you worked so hard to get there. How? How proud are your kids? They're pretty proud. They should be. What is so special about this is that I did raise them in Knoxville, Tennessee. I was doing stand up, but I was I would work on the weekends and I would pick them up at school, drop them off. I got to go on field trips. Very it's very little things that I missed because I got to be with them, but I got to do my dream at the same time. And and when I did the movie with Reese. Witherspoon, You're Cordially Invited, she said to me, Lynn, it's so special that you got to raise your own children. And because, you know, people do movies and they're gone for months at a time. And I'm sure she took her little children with her. But she said, it's wonderful that you got to raise them and you had this full life with them. And I think that's now why I have this material that everybody can relate to, because I am a mama. And I did raise these precious children. And I cooked every meal and I had, honey, a crock pot going in the back after swim practice and all that. And then now this happens and they are at the age where they can enjoy it. And they don't need me like they used to. You know, it would have been if I if I had gotten those television deals, if they had worked with ABC and Warner Brothers and I had some pretty big deals. If they had worked when they were little, that would have been a disaster, honey. I couldn't they're they wouldn't be the people that they are today. If I'd raised them in L.A., as hard as I have to work on that sitcom, I could not have been a good mama. You know, I would have been learning lines and freaked out. And so it all happened the way it was supposed to. And then now I do wish that I could be more of the grandmama in the house dress cooking pinto beans. But I'm doing the best I can with that. But they are. They're proud that, you know, that I stuck it out and persevered. And they're all getting to do a bunch of nifty stuff. You know, they'll go on movie locations with me and get to meet people and go to Emmys and CMAs and stuff like that. And they're old enough to appreciate it. I can't, you know, like there have been a few situations where our daughters, one instance in my head is actually about the Stanley Cup, like the trophy for NHL. It came to our house for the other podcast in our family. And our daughters wouldn't stand next to it. I'm like, guys, I don't think you understand how cool this is. Mom just wants a picture of you with this trophy. You guys don't even understand how iconic this. It's moments like that where you're like your adult children are probably able to lean into the situations that they get to now experience because of your success in a way where they actually get to appreciate it. Yeah. And not just with a picture. Yes. And I also think this. If they had been young when all this happened for me, I see they're already baked in who they are. So I'm so lucky that that my kids were. Because if this had hit that baby child, especially, honey, she'd be walking in a big Prada shoe doing Lord knows what, honey. It has to be a third child thing because our third just recently removed a string of pearls that she had been wearing for two months straight. I'm not. That's not an exaggeration. Two months. She wore these pearls, a full string of pearls for two months. She wore them straight. Wouldn't even take them off to shower. She was. She likes glam. She loves it. See, Tess, Dan, in third grade, her third grade teacher, I just saw her at Costco. She said, I remember Tess always had a Lee Presso nail in third grade and they would go missing or that somebody would find them on the floor. And I would say, please put those in lost and found. Those are Tess Morgan's. Honey, she had she didn't pay attention in school. I hope yours pays attention. But Tess would just sit and look at her nails. Have on full makeup. Makeup. Contour. A prostitute shoe from Walmart. A good glitter shoe. Our third child is three years old. OK, she found rhinestones that she was supposed to. They were rhinestone stickers. She was supposed to be using them to decorate something that her and her sisters had gotten a little craft project. She found every single one that was diamond shaped or pear shaped. She pressed them onto every single one of her little fingers and then was walking around. I think she couldn't figure out how to get them on her right hand because she's right handed. So she was walking around the house with one hand like this and would lose them and tell me, Mom, hold this. Mom, hold this. And then she'd be down one and she'd be going. And I was like, oh, my goodness. It's not even bad. She's just it is determined like her path is determined. I think when you're when you have multiple children, you start to realize within their different. Differences that they came out who they are. That's you got what you got. And honey, be tickled because she'll help you with your makeup. Tess will say to me, I don't like that, Mom. You need a let me put on a lip. You need a haircut. Your color's too yellow. I mean, she has tended to me all of my life about all of that. And then now like comes in with a big pair of sunglasses on with a scent is always dressed to the nines. But also. Could be in the Secret Service is the one that also like goes, don't get on that escalator. I'm watching. There's something about that third one, though, is a bad mamma jamma glamorous and a bad mamma jamma. I bet you. I bet that's what that baby's going to be. She goes to school and collects stories. I don't know that she speaks at school because then she gets in the car and she's my only child. My older two will be like, school is good. My day was fine. They're seven and five. I'm like, you're not teenagers yet. You got to give me more than that. My three year old gets in the car. She's like, let me tell you what happened today. I'm like, yes. Tell me, queen. What do you got? She will come over to me on the couch and go, let's chit chat. And I said, what do you got? What do you guys tell me? What stories do you have? Yummy, honey, yummy. Tell me the best. The best. Now, I do have to ask because I really I enjoy this. One of the daughters, was it Tess in the pinks, snowsuit? Yes, that yes, when we went skiing. And so we actually I think we have that clip right here, Queen Emma. Can we see that clip, please? And we were skiing. She was probably four or five that year. And I bought her, you know, hot pink outfit from Lanzan. I was so tickled and everybody gone off skiing. It was just me and her. We were going in the little gondola up to the bunny slope. And it doesn't take long to get up there to that bunny slope. Nobody else is on that gondola. And she starts taking all of her clothes off. Everything. I'm talking everything. In two seconds, she's nude. And I go, what are you doing? And she said, my butthole itches. That's true. Let me tell you. That is true. And honey, she but she's been nude most of her life. When she would get home from school, they went to a little Christian school, had khaki skirts. She would have to shoo shoo. And so she would say, everybody, leave me alone. Take her clothes off. Charlie would go, mom. And he would, you know, go outside or something. Because he was so modest. And she would just need to be left alone, have her clothes off, go to the bathroom and then walk around in her panties. And she still does it. You know what? There's something very freeing about that. I know, but she's just been her own person. And I've heard old women say four or five and six raise themselves. And I bet they do. Because that third one, honey, I mean, it was all I could do to raise her. And Maggie, her sister, had to help raise her. And Maggie says it was so hard, mom. And it was. We all, you know, had to tend to her. And now she's tended to everybody else. Now, based on the based on the pink snowsuit story, have your children ever been embarrassed about a story that you've told of them? Have you heard feedback? Well, about that one, she said, because she's always backstage. And she goes, when I get on stage, she goes, this is me time. And I need you to go. She goes, I'm not listening to you, mom. Um, this is my me time. Um, after she does my hair and makeup and probably talks to her boyfriend and FaceTimes him and all that. But one, I'd been telling that story, but I wasn't saying that she was four or five. And I didn't realize that. So then she hears it and she goes, mom, people could think I'm 25 and that I took my clothes off my butthole edges. So I went, oh God. So then I started putting, oh, she was four or five years old. Cause she was four or five, but I left that out. So she was mad at me over that. And she goes, you got to say that I was a child, but I didn't take my clothes off, even though she wouldn't take her clothes off if her butthole edged, but which scan, I hate it. I hate to even say that Chuck Morgan loves it. I skied for years. I'm trying to love it. I don't that, that bit people can relate to that bit. Cause you either love skin or you don't. And when you're a mama and you got to get everybody dressed, it's not a vacation. It is H E L L. And so more women came up to me and said, oh my gosh, you nailed skin because it is so hard on a mama. Can I tell you the moment that I got my kids into their snowsuits boots on tucked in mittens on tucked in right helmet on. And then one of those, a little buttholes decided to say, I have to pee. It triggers me. You would have thought, I mean, you would have thought she declared war. I was like, why, why, why couldn't we have peed? part of the story. And we did. That's the part that you're just like, mom knew that that was going to happen. And we actually had a five-minute argument about how you could just try. No. The minute we were zipped and all the layers were in there pushing on the belly, I got to pee. I was like, got it. Let's go pee. I know. This football season, whether you're buying tickets, booking travel, or shopping for team gear, protect your pocket with Visa. Tapping to pay without checking which card, not a pro move. Tapping to pay with Visa, that's a pro move. Visa runs more than 500 security checks to help identify fraud before transactions are approved. So you can focus your defensive energy on other things, like defending the remote from your kids on game day. That might not be a pro move, but paying with Visa is. Visa, the most trusted way to pay for football fans everywhere. The place you call home is important to you. So it's important to Allstate. Because home is where you make all your memories. 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Fans of this show have been asking me to have someone on to speak about perimenopause. And you do this so well on stage and in real life. Can you tell me what I have to look forward to? Okay, my darling. Don't be afraid. But it is rough. Okay. But now, we've got. All these people that are talking about it now, and hormone replacement, and you've got. You know, it's at the forefront now. When I was talking about it on Netflix, everybody was like, you're the first person to ever talk about perimenopause. And I was like, was I? Okay. It lasts 10 years. Perimenopause lasts 10 years. So dumb. And it's the hardest part. But now, you'll have people. You find. Okay, and this is a good tip. In your town, for your audience, whoever is the best compound pharmacist, go to them and say, who does hormones right in this town? Okay. Oh, yeah. Okay. Okay? And then, when you feel like it's coming on, like you're. You know, you could start sweating in the back, sweating right here at night. Just all of a sudden, that starts happening. You feel a little moody. You might have some of these symptoms. You may have none of them. You itch in weird places. You have little heart palpitations. You may be skipping a period every once in a while. You will get through it. But you get somebody to help you. There's so many things you can do now. And HRT, now they know that study was wrong, that it causes breast cancer and all that. That was flawed. They make you feel better. Let me tell you what I do. Two clicks of estrogen in the morning. Two clicks at night. A progesterone pill at night that helps you sleep and relax. And then testosterone. A little dab on my inner thigh in the morning. And I'd like to say that that makes me feel better, but I don't know if it does. I have heard movie stars that have told me that they're taking injections of testosterone in women and it builds a lot of muscle and they want to do it with their husband. But all those are wonderful. And they'll know if you get somebody really good, they'll know when you need to start that. But it can start as early as your late 30s. But it's usually in mid-40s or whatever. And then when you get through menopause, when you get done with it, that's the easy part. Because they know you don't have any hormones and they just replace all of them. They know. But when you're going through perimenopause, it's different. Like your numbers will always be different. But have your doctor or nurse practitioner go by your symptoms, not your numbers, your symptoms. So if you're saying, I'm sweating all night or I can't sleep, go by that. And they'll up your. They'll start putting you on estrogen or a little progesterone or whatever. And you'll be fine. Your generation is going to be great. Because they know now what to do. My little mama, they took them all off everything. And that's what causes dementia and heart disease and stroke. And then now my generation got back on them. And I'm so lucky that I got back on them. And I feel people go all the time, Lynn, you look good for your age. How are you doing all this? You're traveling. You know, because I got a busy schedule. And it's hard. And I think it's these hormones. I'm still eating white flour and drinking Diet Coke. And I've got to get off that. But I love it. Do you? I don't guess so. I mean, you only have one life to live. No. But I'm trying to eat more pineapple. If it makes you feel any better, I have heard multiple times a can of Diet Coke referred to as a fridge cigarette, I believe it is. A fridge cig, yes. So if you're going to start cigarettes, again, you might as well just stick with the Diet Coke. Why would you deprive yourself at this point? You know what I mean? I know. I just, when I quit years ago before I had my babies, I could barely walk to the mailbox and I felt such a loser. And I do think that I could have, I mean, Chuck Morgan would buy me cigarettes when he first met me to try to get me. He was wooing me. And then he told me I smelled bad and I need to quit. And I'm glad he got that monkey off my back. But I could have dated some really cute girls. Cute people if I hadn't smelled bad, but, but I'm going to wait. I'm going to wait on the cigarettes. I say that in my dog center, brings my dogs back. She's got a new boyfriend. He smokes my bagel smells like a cigarette. And I'm like, I can't even take it. It smells so bad. I have to put her in the shower. So I don't know, but I do think when I get to be 80, if there's, you know, like maybe those native American cigarettes that don't have toxins, have so much chemicals in them. Okay. Pure cigarette. I guess if there's such a thing, I'm just so fascinated by native Americans and Hispanic men, because let me tell you, Kylie, my little step granddaddy, my, he married my grandmother and she divorced my grandfather. And he was half Arapahoe, half Mexican. And he was the cutest, sweetest thing. He treated her like a queen. That's all we can ask for. It was precious. It was precious. Really? Do what? I know. Come on. And he doesn't love to dance. And see, y'all are both athletic. Do y'all dance? Do you and Jason, when y'all dated, were y'all dancing? No. No. As athletic as y'all are? Because I think athletes have got good rhythm. I think I've seen Travis maybe do a jig and he had rhythm. So I was recently asked the question, who's a better dancer, Jason? Or Travis? Which I feel like was set up as a trap, to be quite honest with you. But I said that if you were talking about skill, like actual good dancing, it's Travis. If you're talking about enthusiasm, that's my husband. Is he fun? Now I'll tell you what, he can keep a rhythm. He's good with rhythm because he was a Barry Sachs player. So like he's musically inclined. He's very good at music. Don't tell me that. He is very good at music. He is. an enthusiastic dancer does he think you're the prettiest thing he's ever looked at he does say that um i think he's he's he makes some claim about how the first day he laid eyes on me it was like a beam of light can't i'm like cut the shit you gotta cut the shit kylie you need to receive that but he said that because you are a beauty and i want to tell your audience because i know they're young like you and beautiful and y'all need to receive that okay and be happy with your bodies and know what you've got not at your age because i remember looking back and thinking oh i wish this my thighs and then my this and my that and i look back and i think oh my gosh i was had it together it was so yeah it was everything was fun but i didn't feel that way and so i hope y'all i know y'all are in the thick of it with a bunch of babies and somebody's doodooed on the yes it's hard it's a hard time all these little children but it's a precious time and y'all's bodies are holding up and strong i cannot thank you enough for signing on today um this was incredible you can buy tickets to see leanne on tour at leanne morgan.com and check out season two of leanne streaming now on netflix this was incredible thank you so so much thank you my little kylie you know that if i was there i would start cooking i would put in a casserole and start some wash oh because i know you need that help honey literally what my mom does i know your mama comes in there washes those clothes that's the best i love when my mom shows up i know you god you're here i know and i try to do that when i can but if i would help you too honey thank you so much all right you are a doll for having me i feel very very special philadelphia um i will be at 2027 perfect do you like it i will oh honey with that you can come backstage and drink diet coke and eat cheese donna hands perfect all right and that's it for this episode of not gonna lie you can find even more clips from a longer conversation with leanne on my youtube channel on more shit monday follow us on social media at ngl with kylie for clips throughout the week listen and subscribe wherever you get your podcasts not gonna lie is a wave original brought to you by invisalign thanks again to the real ones for tuning in you pink panther is here coach and spotify are teaming up to bring music and style together and they want you to be part of it grab your friends and head to the tabby tour hitting cities around the country with live performances from special artists exclusive experiences and personalized products and discover custom playlists on spotify book just for you just for you based on who you are and how you listen live your story with coach learn more at coach.com finding a doctor is hard enough finding the right doctor even harder someone who takes your insurance has an available appointment when you need one and feels like someone you can actually open up to that's where zocdoc comes in download the zocdoc app to search and compare doctors by specialty insurance and availability read real patient reviews find the right fit for you and book instantly because getting seen by the right doctor matters zocdoc ready to be seen download the zocdoc app today