KT: Behind the Tape (Ep: 790 Yung Gravy + Erik Griffin)

[Music] So I'm going to go on, I'm going to do some impressions. One of the impressions is going to be other giant pussy, which is me, and then I'm going to have like a freak out. It's sort of, particularly when I came up with it, it was like real, and then it's still kind of real. So I freak out, and then I have this proposal bed. Or do you want to do a fake proposal to somebody? Yeah, it's going well. Nice to see you. And I think I'm going to do the proposal bed, I don't know. But I didn't run it by my band, just to make sure we're good with like copyright and stuff like that. Because it's copyright-free and, you know, we should be fine. Yeah, they kind of respond to YouTube, so I feel like. But I did say personal news about you. Yeah, but I'll run it by hand. But yeah, I'm going to do that, and then we'll see if this is the last kill Tony I ever do, if I can start doing myself more. If I have to go back to Tim and no breaks, and I want to do that, I don't know, man. So this is probably the biggest one I've done, and then I have nothing really planned for that interview. I'm just going to try and answer stuff, honestly, not push the comedy too much, be myself. And I talked to my mom about it, and she was like, don't do it. Don't be yourself. And I was like, mom, I just have a lot of trouble with what I really want to talk to about it. No, I get you. And that was fun, having done that in a while. I don't know. I had done it. What happened, you know, me hanging out. I love it. I forget how much fun it is. It's been two god damn long. It used to be part of my pre-show routine. I'm great. I love you, Dee. Can't wait to have a long island and a crown and coke with you afterwards. He's got to get through the hard part. Always. I got a milligram animal. Oh shit. I've been wondering why you're smiling so big back there. I ain't took away yet. Oh. I can't open this god damn fucking thing. All right. Before we get into it, I got to tell you guys about something. We just launched Killtony Plus. Here's the deal. You sign up. You get every new episode, add free and uncensored. We're giving members a brand new angle of the show that's never been seen before. This is as close as you can get to sitting in the audience. You also get bonus content. Q&A episodes behind the scene stuff. Extra bits. You're not getting anywhere else. And there's perks on the merch store too. It's five bucks a month. That's less than a cost of a beer or a pack of cigarettes or a lot of fun things. Links in the description or go straight to killtony.supercast.com to join. This is a very, very exciting opportunity for all you die hard fans and super haters. Go to killtonysupercast.com. All right. Back to the show. Oh, hey, I didn't see you there. You know, we all value our privacy. But thousands of data brokers are working behind the scenes to collect and sell your personal information. 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If they can't find you, use code killtony at the link below and get 60% off an annual plan in Cogni.com/killtony. I want to look into penis enlargement surgery for myself. I don't want to do that then. No, it's changed the subject. How much, what's the cheapest penis enlargement surgery do you think I could get? I don't think you want to go cheap. Well, yeah, I mean fair point. But like quality, quality wise, like best bang for my buck. Like Turkey? Turkey? All right, 20 grand. Did you take really less money? No, but I was saying it could definitely use it. If it had a few more inches, it would be extremely impressive. That's true for everybody. Yeah, it is. There's a lot of black guys out there, probably one of them. I don't get it. I don't need a few bucks to increase your bang, you know? Every man worth the length of his own penis knows that two is bigger than one. I'm going to have a dick that can fit all the way in a person. I wouldn't want just like the tip of my fingers. Oh, fuck you. It feels way better to have your whole dick in a vagina. I don't care if it feels good for that. It feels good for me. I wouldn't want to only be able to put like that much on it. Yeah, but right now my whole dick fits in half of it. I'll jump in there with you. My hands are all sweaty. I got sweaty hands from playing the drums. Oh, there it is. Oh, man, I feel like Andrew Wilson opening a pickle jar. God, Magnus, I need you, dude. Holy shit, almighty. You got dry hands. All they need is to be dry. Mine are soaking wet. He got it. Red bands a master of opening jars. Uh-huh, usually mayonnaise. That's right. Little smuckers. My peanut butter and jelly morning sandwiches. That's breakfast in breakfast in bread. You know, it's crazy. They say that black people are the number one molasses in the world. But, and I thought about it and I said it's true. Because everyone that get molasses just always seem to just black out. This gang say they're the biggest in the world. This gang say they're the biggest in the world, but they're not. It's deaf people. Because they're gonna throw this set up all day. We love you. We had the most passionate, weak, long Mexican romance, and then we both decided we'd better friends. Show co-sum night. Yeah, we should the bed. Yeah, but that she met that as a metaphor, not literally. Literally, like, you know, Amber, her, Linda. Literally, like. I've never heard of that. Yeah, I took a shit in bed. It's true. Story's out. She's in the whole relationship. She's like, oh, I can't be with somebody that shits in our hotel, but. No, that's what I paid you for. Yeah, she paid me a whole lot. Damn, it's really hard to guess Andrew. Yes, I did shit in the bed. I know that you have to do it. That's why I do it. What's one of the best things about getting older? What? Well, I can't think of anything good about it. That's how you do it. Well, I'll tell you what. I know you got the biggest balls out of the whole crew. How long ago about that? No, I do. I know for a fact. We have a special bathroom camera that we don't tell anybody about. It's just in case Heidi takes out her nipple covers. You saw those old long balls, Joe. Old long balls, old city long balls. That's what they call them. They call them that in a civil war, old long balls. In civil war, what are you talking about? I know. You were in. That was in long before that. You were in the Revolutionary War. Revolutionary War. I was there with Jordan. That's right. You also fought against the Romans. I did. That's right. What was in Legion 69? Uh-huh. You once had a bitch slap of dinosaurs as well, correct? What kind of dinosaur was that? Stegosaurus. Oh, Stegosaurus. A favorite kind. You know, it's the one that got that kind of seal with the thing and pull it out of the nose. Yeah. Were those a vegetarian or a carnivore? No, no. They're vegetarian. Oh, wow. It's kind of like a cow. They only eat grass. Uh-huh. A lot of them, of course. Red bands like a cow and he never eats vegetables. Well, he eats salads as well. That's right. If there's a piece of lettuce on a sandwich, that's his vegetables for the year. That's right. That's right. But I figured why me to get steak. I'm being a vegetarian. You're goddamn right. How about when you're eating boost? Uh, well, that's a little different school. You ever put any condiments on it? But what? You ever put any condiments on pussy before you eat it? No, no, no, no, no. You like the natural. Oh, you've got to have them down here. That's like a steak. You can't put a one on it. - Some people say. - Oh, no. Of course not. - Mm-hmm. - You can't really-- - Why would you usually use a condom before you really eat something? - Condiments? - Yeah. - Not a girl's vagina? - Yeah. - Yeah, I have to put some meat juice on there. - Ah, I see. - 'Cause I'm gay. (laughing) - All right, let's be totally real for a second. Life can be an absolute circus, and therapy is super important, but who has time to sit bumper to bumper, trafficker, burn a giant hole in their wall just to talk to someone, not me. That's why I completely recommend talk space. Talk space makes getting professional mental health support ridiculously easy, accessible, and totally affordable. - Ooh, gay band. - Look, man, they're the number one rated online therapy platform, matching you directly with top-notch licensed therapists in psychiatrists, right? From your phone or computer. Whether you're spiraling over a minor delay in convenience, totally burnt out, or now giving big life chaos, you can shoot them a message, or jump on a video call without ever changing out of your sweat. - Ooh, plus talk space makes most major insurance plans, which means most insured members pay a copay of $0. She's, yeah, me being out of the pocket, they're on a mission to keep amazing mental health, care superior, super budget friendly for everyone. As a listener of this podcast, you'll get $80 off your first month with talk space when you go to talkspace.com, and enter a promo code space800. That's SPAC80, and match with a licensed therapist today, go to talkspace.com and enter a promo code SPAC80. - A talk space therapist will be in your corner for whatever it comes up. To talk through your hard relationships, share your pride and big accomplishments, and be a place for you to vent, day or night. When you make space for a therapist who just gets you, life just gets brighter. Talk space therapists are all licensed with an average of 10 years of experience. Talk space is covered by most insurance plans and maybe no cost to you. Go to talkspace.com to get started. - How are you? - I've been doing pretty well. Today's a really good day to you, and outside. - It is, yeah. - It should be called hip-hop. It's not mid. It's high humidity, right? And don't worry, I'm just warming up. Literally, it's human. - Hi, Red Van. How are you? - How are you? - Wow, you have a little jacket on. - Yeah, he does. - Well, thanks for your jacket. - Every time he dresses up, that means I'm dressing now. - I'm just in second, remember, I've been cooking up my collar. - Hey. - I'm cooking up my collar. - Shit. - No, you get 'em. - I got it. - My nipples are hard. - Well, Heidi's early to, no, they're not. - They are. - You're not. You put so many covers on it, shit. - I'm not early today. Heidi is. - I don't know, did you see this? - Oh my God. - Oh. - Let's put some, like, my essence in there. Let's try to scoop my essence. - Well, if you fucking shard in there right now, I will look. - Do it real. - Oh my God, that actually works. - Right? - God, I like me. - You're so hot, Heidi. Jesus Christ. - So, I have a date where I'm gonna play a song. And a song I made on Suno. - Oh shit. - And using copyright free, a rip of the copyright free track. And it's just like edited it together to make this. - You should be okay, right? - You made it? - Well, I used other tracks. - If he made it? - Why did I made it in Suno? And then why, and I have a pro claim. And then why? - Wait, you made the tracks though. - What do you mean? - The ones that you put together? - Yeah, like, took two songs that I found. One I made on Suno. But the other one was rip here, let me show you. - You have to own the rights of the songs that we're playing. - Let me show you. (dramatic music) - So does that have no copyright, which music, copyright free music? - So, when you're the biggest church, is that it's the copy, right? - How are you? - So you put it in the music and something, so that they can get started. - Hi, Kim. - How are you? - I'll reach out and pay for it. $60,000, you never had a charge. No, that's how much we would look, you know, just as a joke. - Like, that's, you know. - So they say copyright free, but it's not copyright free? - Like 90% of the time. But we can try it, and then if I have to pull it, we pull it. - Okay. - I think we try it. - Okay. - And then I'm gonna reach out to them and secure the rights. But like, it's a section of the appearance, so we can literally just cut it out. - But you ran it through Suno? - So Suno, so it's a dubstep, like the chorus is dubstep, the other part is a major. - Oh, I know you're making a lot of money. - The light melody I made, and you know, the dubstep part I ripped from that. - So you just combine two different songs. - Okay. - Which it does uploaded, the dubstep to Suno, have them redo it. But that's a bit, not copyrighted. Then Suno would have been like, oh, okay, you did that? That's cool. Does that make sense? - A little bit. (laughs) - Hey, bud. - Hey. - How are you? - Good. - Hi. - Are you going on, just show? - No, I just got back into town like an hour ago. - Oh, from where? - I was from the poker tour. - From the poker tour? - Oh, yeah. - From the poker show for 11 days, and then I went to-- - Oh, yeah, it's going to be great. - It's going to be great, yeah. - That's awesome. - Yeah. And then I went straight on the road with Bert, so I went from a van for 11 days to a bus for 11 days, for four days in a class year. - Yeah. - How was that being on the bus? - With Bert, it's so fun. I mean, the bus is nice, and we have bugs, but it's just, you know, it's really good on the bus, actually, 'cause we take off when we're going to sleep, so we drive while we sleep, and it just walks back like a baby. The poker shit was cool, crazy. - It looked wild, too. - Crazy. - Is it a show or was it just on the road? - It's a TV show, yeah. And they were trying to make it. It's like a big brother-esque poker shows. They put me and Laser with four poker bros. She took us all around six cities in Texas. We did, like, different challenges, and those challenges during the day that are, like, shooting, like, Texas things, when you chips for a final game, where we play for $100,000. - Nice. - Oh my gosh, that's awesome. - Yeah. - You know, you used to be in here tickling people in the green rooms, you've changed. - Yeah. - You've grown up. - My sleep schedule's all fucked up right now. - I can't believe I'm saying it. You've grown up a bit. We used to ask us how low damp per day we were. - Yeah, I agree with you. - I'm still like that. I'm just tired. We're not tired, I guess. - Oh, yay. - I just, my sleep schedule's fucked. Janice is out of town for 10 days, so I'm like, oh, I can just sleep whenever I want to and do whatever I want. - It's crazy. As soon as you get nine hours, you turn into a pervert. (laughing) - You're saying when you're tired, you're normal? - Yeah. (laughing) - Nobody let this man sleep. - We've known each other for so long. I was talking to a pervert about it yesterday. (laughing) - It's really crazy. - I think I make it the first night you came to town. - I think so. - Because you slept on your cousin's floor? - Yeah. - And I have to all say about that. - I know he banged her, he says it every time I go on stage. He's like, I'd bang her cousin, we'll shoot him on the floor. I didn't hear anything. - First time I never met her. She's sleeping right here. I was like, oh, we gotta do it tonight. (laughing) - I didn't hear things. (laughing) - Because I would think Redband really rocks the bed. It was a, it was a very quiet four seconds. (laughing) - I think it was the mattress on the floor. - Oh, no. - Poor Dan, even closer to her. - She was sleeping, or was she sleeping on me? - Oh yeah, I remember. - I might be as like, some secret where he nutted on me. (laughing) - I like to imagine that she just laying there for the first time in big L.A. and she's a singer watching her cousin get there. - I remember that day that I moved because the song that was out. ♪ She's up all night to get some ♪ ♪ I'm up all night to get some ♪ ♪ I'm up all night to get lucky ♪ - That one. And I always think of you and McCalla and that song. And Tony and being in the main room, when the main room had the piano on the stage, I remember my very first night in L.A. Dude, we hung out my very first night at the comedy store. We all hung out in the main room until like 3 a.m. and everybody's telling ghost stories. Do you remember William, Albert, Meyer, or whatever? I remember. Oh, he did, oh shit. Well, I didn't know who he was, I'd never seen him. And it was like, everybody left to go. And I was like, I'm gonna go pee real quick. I go to Backstage, I pee, I'm washing my hands, and I hear that shower backstage. No, it unlocks, someone's in it. It's like 4 a.m. and it opens the door and it's him and that green soup, he's all pale. That's what I knew, that ghosty, I screamed and some ran out. Nobody looked like he looked like he got up. He was scared of me and I was scared of him for the next 8 years. Like, we just looked at each other and ran away. That's hilarious. There he is, what's up, man? How you doing? I'm fine. I'm fine. I'm so excited to have you. Hello, yes sir. I brought a gang with me. Hi. That's what I mean. What's up, man? How you doing? That's all part of it. How you doing, man? Did you see him, man? I thought I saw you, was-- So it's up a lot in the Williams, see? What you did? You like-- I said you know the horrible lines. That's pretty nice. It's crazy it's recognized that I was jacking. Crazy it's recognized that I was jacking. All right. [INAUDIBLE] [INAUDIBLE] We're actually pretty good buddies. I don't know what to do with this guy. Now they're jacking on me. Yeah, you only let's meet him up with him when I have those other jackals. You know lasers? You guys are buddies? Well, yeah, he plays the video games, I play with women and together. What happened to fucking being able to have 5 to 8 drinks? Yeah, same smoke, same seed, wipe your balls off. It's okay. You don't have to do crap. And by the way, and if they did that, guess what? They wouldn't be eating fucking McFlurry's for a. Right, you gotta have that too. Right. They're not fucking up, that's all. You want to know? Yeah, I'm starting to have time tomorrow. Oh shit, you owe me $100. It's like you're drinking a beer. Yeah, we're in the out of box. No idea. I mean, I made that bet with Jimmy Nobri, and I haven't filled her in forever. With Jimmy Shaper? Yeah, with Jimmy Shaper. Yeah, what do you, what's happened? What's going on? What's going on? Yeah, what's up? Me and Black for the year, and I just want to say that we support Killton Plus. Killton Plus? No, no, no, no. What is it? What is Quoll? We got Quoll, and then Talkspace. Yo, guys. Talkspace, Quoll, Moto Cassino, and Jerkmate. Jerkmate. I don't know if it's in Jerkmate, but she's talking about Jerkmate. It's not a cam website, it's a cam website right now. I just did monoclonal stuff. You just did a whole fucking movie. I was like, "I just brought a little note." A little note. What a conversation on the internet. We've changed. We've changed. You know what I'm saying? Yeah, it's not worth that much. Are you going to keep the hair clean? Yeah, back to the chat. Fucking style. This song is like a steady getting like 70K days. It's really good. Then there's trend drops. And then like May. And wow, doubles and streams for like a month. Wow, even still today. It's higher than it was before. Wow. It's going to start on an outfit. Oh yeah, I know that one. Which one is that one? That one? That one? That one? Yeah. That one? Yeah. You guys met? I love it. I was just coming to do that. Yeah, we're doing this. It's going to be so great. Yeah, so happy to have you guys. Yeah, this is something else. Oh, it's fucking rock and roll in comedy. All the sauce and text. I only like gravy when it's on a steak. That is correct. Yeah, that's right. Orders, orders, orders, six tequila doubles. Yo, give me the top shelf tequila, dig it a double. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's fucking, guys. No one knows how to pat a bill like this guy. He's a young gravy. David. Gravy's the man. Oh, yeah. That's not that I was with all the fans. I mean, there are people. Sometimes I'll be like, oh my god. Yeah. Yeah, you know, but that's what I do. But I do book it out. Yeah, it also depends on what time of the year. I take a big picture. But yeah, you are right. It's a big deal now. It's a big deal. But I'm glad we got it. What do you get? I don't know. Just with the beauty. No right now. Oh, yeah. So nice. It seems to me no breaks. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You don't have it this week. What are you going to talk about? Are you drinking? No. We've done this a few times. Are you sure you have it? All right, I'll give you a spot. But take it easy on the booze. You always end up getting too drunk and then you regret it. You get drunk up a like two beers. I'm going to bring it on. All right, drink some water. Delicious. Ow! Make sure you say that when you're up there. I'm going to drink some water. Can y'all switch glasses real quick? All right, yeah? I don't know. I don't know. It looks like such a k-pop romantic sex when you have your glasses on. That's it. I didn't do the grass. I don't know. And all he does is write and think a funny shit all day. Stays sober, he already had his crazy times in life. So like, it's just like this, like, the genius. - Ninth. - Yeah. - Yeah. - Yeah. (chattering) - You're not, you're not, you're not. - I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, you're not. - Oh my god. - He's like a smith or something. - We're gonna follow this, this demon's going in. - I thought you mean it, like, makes me look like a demon. - That's the widest problem I've ever heard of. My god. You'll see hidey, look at hidey. He's bumpin' on the side. (chattering) (chattering) - You can never be parried in the Jewish cemetery. (chattering) (chattering) - God, I can't, I can't, I can't. - I can't, I can't, I can't. (chattering) - Uh, Christina, you know you guys just had to do it on here. - It's a long time coming. - Brandy. - And I love her, I'll stop. - What did you say? - It's every since real girls, you know what I'm saying? (chattering) - Yeah, that's what I'm saying. (chattering) - It's a mother dragon, it's a mother dragon. (chattering) - You got the extra fabric off your tits? - Yeah, yeah, it's like the, I think the moaning out. - You're about to get a boning in, you keep standing next to me like that. - Red man, what the fuck have you been eating this week? You look bloated, what are you doing over there? (chattering) Oh god, that's what it is, it's one sandwich. Oh I did, I only had one sandwich. - Red man, you look great. - Now face that way, put your body facing that way. Now look, now don't suck it in. (chattering) (chattering) - Sucking it in, it's still fast. It sucks it in, it's just a normal fat guy. Without the sucking, you just have your sandwich. Yeah, all right. What happened, you were allergic to ozempic or something? You were allergic to what or something? Ozempic, you never tried it? Well buddy. (laughing) - I can get it. (chattering) - You know, if I break, you can add a little bit. - We're gonna sneak some on one of your sandwiches. (laughing) It's like a pet, you have to put it in a cheese ball like something, ma, ma, ma, ma, ma, ma. (chattering) Oh my god, no you look great. - I like the jack, no, I don't like, I'm keeping it. - We all can't look like we have eggs. - Whoa, whoa, whoa, where's your sound effect? Give me your sound effect, ba, ba, ba, ba, ba, ba, ba, ba, ba, red band. (laughing) - Just go pee by some chance. - I did, perfect. That's what I tell the guests to do right before we go out. - I just wanna run out of perfect. - It'll be fun, you hanging? - Is it what? - You're hanging tonight? - I'm walking through the air. - I love it. - Let's have a real hoot-dandy. I'm gonna bring you two up at the same time in about three minutes. You sit next to me and you sit on the end. That's the best way to do it. And try to stay square to the table. Sometimes that car gets, so kind of the episode goes on, kind of start to like, moot their chair that way. And then you're gonna disconnect it from me in the panel. You'll see, you just kind of stay face-to-face. - Yeah. - All right, we'll see you in a bit. (upbeat music) - Yeah, here we go. Easy breezy. Another day in the office. - Now that's great, my baby. - Awesome fun. Here's extra curly today for some reason. - I like it. - Let's give it out. - A little something, we're a little sticky. ♪ Bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam ♪ - Here we go again, huh? It's always me on this one. (upbeat music) - Guys, who's ready for the best fucking night of their lives, huh? (audience cheering) (upbeat music) - Uh-uh, yee-ee. ♪ We're our inner and mad ladies and gentlemen ♪ ♪ And that is the best standband in all my life ♪ (audience laughing) - You're talking about me. - I want fun, don't yell at anything. - You're a little worried about it, you can laugh. - What's going on? - It's gonna be great, I'm gonna be filming here with us. - I'm gonna feed you, I'm gonna send you the service. - It's gonna be alright, we're gonna be honest. - That's great, that is great, so tonight's for some show. (audience cheering) - I'm excited about this one. - Where I am bringing on one of my favorite musicians, one of my favorite rappers in the world, and who also happens to be fucking hilarious and cool itself, and I'm putting them on with one of the legendary guests of this show, and absolutely one of the funniest cute things of the world, you know, and for more of the haul, I think it's new to the Go-Keynet, the Patreon cast out comes out to some report. Ladies, Joe, this is it, I present here to you guys tonight. (audience cheering) - I am sorry for what my people have done, that is, I don't take responsibility for it. I did, I'm not even joking, I thought Nenya, who was that his city rapper, (audience laughing) I don't know what's going on over there, I can do it. People are like, he's big nose, bitch, and I'm like, why are you saying that? They're like, Palestine, I'm like, what is that? I don't know, I don't do this. Yeah, you guys really fuck me up, it's not your fault, it's my fault. I'm a comedian, and I just want you to know that this doesn't go well in my career ends, because I've walked away from the only reason I have a career. It's your fault, specifically your fault, man. Your energy is fucking me up. So, give it up for gay people, give it up for yourself, and give it up for our host, it's a fun. (audience cheering) (audience cheering) Okay, fuck, fuck, fuck. - No matter, I'm not the fastest you can be, like there's levels to fat. - Oh, do we get one? - I think the fastest a man can be is a man who wears suspenders. - Okay, yeah. Imagine eating the same technology as a bridge. (audience laughing) - God. - I've lost it so much. - But if you want people to know, we are. - It's probably already insane to tell you guys. (audience laughing) - Then you were like, yeah, it's probably already gone. (audience laughing) - It's never gone back. - Yeah, but it looks like, - That's not what I'm saying. - That's not what I'm saying. - That's not what I'm saying, that's not what I'm saying. - And he goes, "That's an nightmare." (audience laughing) - Yeah, follow me up here. (audience laughing) - Are you gonna try to follow me? - Yeah. - Yeah. (audience laughing) - Oh my. (audience laughing) (audience laughing) (audience laughing) (audience laughing) (audience laughing) - Can I get my leg? (audience laughing) - Are you going up? - Yeah. - I hate this part. - Wait, that's fucking all you nervous. (audience laughing) - Might as well drink. (audience laughing) - Oh no. (audience laughing) (audience laughing) - Try and do some worse. - We go out there bombing. - No, it's bad, it's like a drink. - Anticipating. (audience laughing) - Someone just bombed. (audience laughing) - I watched this. - That's what they gave us. - I just wanted to go have a horse. (audience laughing) - I'm gonna try to break your studio. I don't even know how many of this works. Come on, take many of three times. I'm going out of your car. (audience laughing) I wore my best goddamn aerosmith mid drift shirt for this. And you're gonna sit there roast me like this. Come on, Tony. Come on, I got this. I stepped. I stepped my mom left this in my studio apartment last night. And I decided to wear it, and I'm gonna lose a lemon to do my thing. I got a blood pressure receptor on my right forearm right now. Doctor said I had to keep it on for a week test if I'm doing drugs and whatnot. My heart rate's out of control. I'm gonna get-- I'm just peeled up on gas station, bone or pills and stickless corn dogs right now. Come on, let me talk, Tony. Give me a second here. I got a lot to say. I've been waiting two and a half months for this. You can finally let me on again. Everybody knows I'm the biggest goddamn son of those ever seen. Just, hey, let me get a goddamn warning. What do I gotta do? Play my harmonica to get a fucking warning over here. I got four harmonicas in ABC and a D. Let me feel around to you, oh, that's my dick. That's my ass. Shit. That's what you're having, man. [APPLAUSE] [MUSIC PLAYING] All right. Well, we in Bob. There you go, I just want to meet you. [INAUDIBLE] Oh, wait, I'm so sorry about the today. That's-- I'm going to tip. Tint's guy, you know? None. None ass guy. Oh, I'm dead, don't I shut the fuck up! [LAUGHTER] Wow, just look at it. Now where? [MUSIC PLAYING] Yeah. On the night, we're done. Yeah. I've been drinking a little bit over a few years ago. You guys know there's so much fun, right? Oh, it's time to talk for me, like, about 20 minutes. [LAUGHTER] Hell yeah. She's taking a drink. Yeah, it was so easy. How do you feel right now? You know, got the little butterflies, but that'll go away, just in dribbling. Yeah. Yeah, before you were said, you were a little nervous. Yeah, you always get nervous, but this one I fucking hate, because sometimes you go out there and eat a dick, and it sucks, so you think about that, but it's the ants. Well, yeah, once you get out there, you get comfortable, skin a little harmonica, get in line with the lord. Yeah, dude, it was fun. I just got anxiety, like, ants right now, still, yeah. Yeah, you mentioned on stage that you quit drinking. That's a lot. But-- [LAUGHTER] I'm out to do something, though. Yeah. How'd you feel of Tony and Persuading you for, like-- Boy, you went forever. God, damn you went forever. But, you know, it was cool, because in there, it gives me time to thank about what I'm going to say. So, I was going to go-- I was going to do, like, I was just going to start singing "Aerosmith" at first. Like, I just want to-- oh, you cool up. But then I was like, you know what, just say thanks for having me. And so I feel like it played into it. That's good. And then you had a heartwarming moment with one of the panelists. Yeah, Eric Griffin was the first time I ever did kill Tony, first time I ever did stand up ever. He was the guest. And I was dog shit then, but I had a little spunk to me. And, yeah, it was a cool little moment to rekindle that flame. Yeah, it's all full source, like, the Lion King. When, like, Scar kills that boy's daddy. That's great, dude. Yeah, you can revive the crowd, man. Yeah, boy, there was some duds in before me. So I looked at-- I was like, shit, I might not have the worst. I looked at Timmy Nobrizov, and it might be you. But, you know what I'm saying? But, yeah, dude, it was fun. That was cool. [VIDEO PLAYBACK] [VIDEO PLAYBACK] I mean, these are trade secrets. You can't just be giving them out here. You're trying to just keep them for yourself, dude. You're not even eating the ass out there. Talking about toilet motions, and you don't even eat ass. What can I say? I don't even eat ass. I said-- You're the fucking nerd. Who would be as a freak of nature? Didn't actually know his name was Brady. Balls to the wall. Ladies and gentlemen, I think I'm going to use a great, powerful-- maybe Nobrizov. [VIDEO PLAYBACK] Hello, fuck, what are we doing? Hey, gay gay. Nice to see you. [LAUGHS] Are you a battery? Because those are some double-aids. Small pits. I mean, come on. What? Front row? What are you doing, bitch? All right. This last one is going to be a-- let's do an impression of a giant pushy. OK, check this out. What's up? My name's Tim Stiefler. I'm from San Diego, and this leather jacket is my prison. I fucking-- I fucking-- No, you guys don't understand. I've been doing this for a year. I have to do the shit forever. I'm so fucked. I am so fucked. You have no idea. [VIDEO PLAYBACK] [MUSIC PLAYING] Do you need the toilet, or something? What did they do? [INAUDIBLE] Get some-- no, I should-- you should have the-- you should have the glasses for one. Let's get some glasses. Come on. That's all they have. One thing I found out about me-- I can't expect that. Yeah, we can't expect that. Oh, that's it, dude. I think you know that. I love it. And I get a picture of it, too. Yeah. Was it really a baby? He was. Can't put my back back, you know? No, I'm very lucky, for my son, to grow a little bit. But for his and I, you know, man, there's a lot of life. And then I'll competitive energy. If I'm telling the end of time, I go to his room. I make sure I'm not on the floor. I'm not on the floor. He says, I want to get out of walk, but let's get-- Stop. I thought he's got a bigger piece of me. You know what I do now. You're a free bird now. I don't know. And I'm going to be in the 48's. Yeah. It's an hour, and you can catch him at home. It'll be gone by now. Because if you freaking out, it was freaking out a little bit. But it kind of-- it worked. Because you were like, I'm so good at this part of it. Just the time when you take care of him. Oh, how long have you been in the stand? Thanks for the years. How many years have you been in? What part of seeing that to you have been doing it? [LAUGHTER] He's an awesome-- Awesome. [LAUGHTER] Be yourself. I was freaking out on a different level. [LAUGHTER] I was freaking out on a different level. The sun is-- the sun's a great big day to do it a while. Now I can't do it on the other day. That's what sucks about it, because you do burn it. Yeah, burn it, because I was like, all right, this is the first time I'm coming back. So this woman's like, this is a good day. No, it-- no, it-- Did you consider-- We're going to look at people on the balcony. We're going to look at people on the balcony. That's how I look at people on the balcony. It's how I look at people on the balcony. I feel good. I feel good. Yeah, it's how I look at people on the balcony. You have to have a tarot card on it, my friends. It'll give you magical nut busting. Oh, he was a little weird at first on the first one, but you still let him do it? Wait, what? Oh, the first night. The first night, you said he was a little bit hands-y or touch. Oh, no. He wasn't like that. No. She wanted a fuck. She wanted to fuck him and he let it rip. I lose weight. It might be an option for me. - Her. - She's saying her. - To get pimped out. - Oh you, okay. Now I got, it got weird-- - You're making a joke. That was a joke. - No, it's good to see her real. - You would be willing to prostitute yourself? - Well-- - Has he talked about, has he talked with us about you? - Yeah, he doesn't like the idea. He'd rather me just do gang things, but I'm not really into that. (dramatic music) - Yeah, we gotta get her to court now right now. (dramatic music) - This is so amazing, by the way. This is the longest interview of the night, times two. - Where are things at now? So you guys are struggling for rent to see doing any visibility, hustling, and all they're trying to scribble this out in bucks or 12 days later, rent, you know? - Just trying to, I think it starts to work and stuff. (audience laughing) (dramatic music) - No! - No! - No! - Shit! - Real cool, and it's going to be a lot of fun. - I'm shaking, it's going to be great. And I'm going to give you some advice. Go out front and stand out there when the show's over. A lot of all those people tell you how funny we're, makes fans. You can do it. Do it, do it. Do it. Good job. One, all right, have a good night. I think you're great. Shoes are coming off, oh shit. This is like the UFC way, and Heidi, you got a scale back there? Bring out the lovely Heidi, you got that. There she is. All right, here we go. What do we got over there? - One, nine. - One, 98.4. - Wow. (audience cheering) (dramatic music) - That is incredible. - That's the 80 right girls. - Fuck yeah! (audience laughing) - I don't smell right. - No! - You're good! - I already told her that she sees every drop. - I probably like those things. - I was 120 chicks at the bottom. - I don't think so. - I didn't think we knew. - But I was going to do it with me all the time. - 160 all muscle. - Oh, you know what I'm saying? - The graphic shrink. I got his pop cast, "Green Bear" and everything else. - I'm not on it. - All the stuff. - All right. (audience laughing) - It's great. - Amazing. - Yeah, great. - Do you want to play us that one? - We got a song to get us out of here. (audience cheering) - Great, you and all of Joy and I. You're available everywhere. Tell me your tour. - He's in Florida. - Atlanta, Nashville, the Carolina's, and New York, all coming up. Eric Evans in the movie "Beautiful Human." Pedro Pascal. December 4th, ladies and gentlemen. I present to you. (upbeat rock music) (audience cheering) (audience laughing) - Acoustic. - It's an acoustic vape. You know, all the kids are vaping at it. It doesn't look like a trick. This is an acoustic vape. - Well, I don't know what you're gonna put in here. - You know what I'm gonna do? - You put it on real? - I'm not so skinny. - Because I'm skinny. - I was never telling this kid. - I wouldn't say it in a not good way. - I'm skinny when I just said it. - What was that? - I've been trying to eat it. - Actually, but trying to eat it. The doctor said I weighed 126. - Is that too much right? - Mm-hmm. - Mm-hmm. (upbeat rock music) [MUSIC]