Klingo Wings

(upbeat music) - Hey, Bert. - Is it any, I mean, it's the sound is fine. It's just the time it takes for you to react to what I'm saying, all right? So it's just life, the general. - Maybe there's actually no problem. I mean, you're just rude, you're just rude and you don't wanna speak to me. But, like, we'll put it past me. So, yeah, I think we're okay. I don't think there's a delay response now. I'll ask you a quick fire question and you've got to answer it within two seconds. - Okay. - Do you fancy me? - No. - See, there's a bit of a delay. (laughing) - So, the wrong answer came through. - Yeah, it sounded like you said, no. (laughing) - So, we have got a serious 10 of course, you need to get over here. - Okay, again. - Okay. Same question or a different question? - Any question. - Any question, okay. Right. Are you gonna leave your wife for me? - Give me a second. (laughing) - What? (laughing) - No, mate, sorry. No. - Do you know what? I wouldn't ask you two. - I really wouldn't. - Yeah, I'm not really. - I'm not really recorded. This makes great content. (laughing) - I'm happy for us to just see each other on a casual basis. - Yeah. - Yeah. - So, yeah. - You can give me my dirty little toy. (laughing) - What, like, end toy that you leave outside, like a walking dog with a bit of water left in it. And it's kind of like, it's a bit green. You're a shitty, rusty bike. (laughing) Or like a sand pit that you just left in, it's filled with water and a cat's shadow in it. (laughing) - Dude, you're a knackin' tennis racket with a lot of strings missing. (laughing) Fair enough, man. But if you wanna hit a ball, back with a forwards, I can still do it, right? Just about. - Yeah, yeah. - Very good. - Yeah, if you wanna build a sand castle, I can still build a crumbly shitty smelling sand castle. - Yeah, but watch it. (laughing) - Yeah, just watch it. (laughing) Okay, all right. (laughing) Can we just start? (laughing) - Yes, fast. (laughing) Oh, okay. Well, that was a nice start. But, so today's agenda. So, after the last episode where you were the master and the agenda, I think we both realized that that was a dreadfulness take to let to leave it in your hands, right? - I've had feedback that my MC, and my stewardship of episode one of season three was spectacular. You know, they said it was like a, around like a military funeral. - I think. (laughing) - What we like flags over, everyone's coughing. - And stuff like that. - You know, we've been a military funeral. I've been to. - You get like three fume rolls a week for something. (laughing) - I'm not surprised, right? I'm not surprised. We've been to one at sea. (laughing) - Joe Barry White got cremated at sea. - cremated? - What do you mean cremated at sea? - I got cremated at his ashes, but like, you know, buried at sea. - Obviously. - I doubt that they cremated the body on the boat though. That's quite dangerous thing to do. To have a furnace. - Oh, I love that. - Really? I thought burial at sea was you route the body in like, a white sheet or a flag or something, and then you like, you attach it to a top mast, and then you fire it out and it, and off of the side, and it sinks. - Yeah, but I mean, that's from me, Corbett. - That's the worst. - What else is Barry White's naval tradition? (laughing) - It's just his preference, man. Each to their own. Like, yeah, no, but like buried at sea. You know, you expect someone who served a bit in the merchant navy or something like that? What Barry White did for people? - Do you know that Barry White did it? Like, have you researched Barry White for this? - I can't say I have no. - No. - So yeah, if it's a state getting contact with us, that means we're here. - He might have been like a submarine captain in the war or something, you know. You never know. - Maybe he was instrumental in the Cold War. - Yeah, he could have been. He could have been so. I wouldn't like to be stuck on a submarine with Barry White. He's like in cases of emergency to be honest. Like, you know, if he's up the ladder first, you're not getting out, man. - Yeah. Although, when he said, "Oh, periscope," I bet that was pretty sexy. Go on, you'd say it then. - More beaver. (laughing) - Periscope. (laughing) - Let's get some Russian and Vladivostok. - Come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on. - You're not saying, "Dive, dive, dive, dive." - I was saying, "In Barry White." - Yeah. - Dive, dive, I'm so sick. (laughing) You better dive, baby. You better dive real good. (laughing) - Oh, baby. - Yeah. - The nuclear code's a lot to load it. (laughing) - Three bubbles to the left, baby. Three bubbles to the right. (laughing) - It's amazing, where all conversation's taken, that's really in there. - The horn for white uptrooper. (laughing) Oh dear. (laughing) (laughing) Anyway, yeah, funerals, yeah, Binsertube. - That's even a luxury one. - None of them died in active service though. - What happened, they've fallen off the car going there in the, in training or something. (laughing) - Well, they did like, private pile from full metal jacket and they're going a little bit, a little bit. - A bit. - A, well, yeah, both blew their own heads off. And I just died of old age, mate. But, one was a British one, British military one. So that was good. And then the other one was an American military one. And American Marines carried, it was in a church in Liverpool. American Marines carried them in. And then like they folded the flag and presented it to his widow and all this. - They all fly over for that, or what? - Yeah, well, mate, it was like a top chief, but then he went crackers and, well, yeah, dementia, anyone else. - That is actually horrendous. And you know, I'm gonna have to keep that in. So everyone knows, realises what a bastard you are. I'm sorry. - Yeah. - Well, listen, listen to this. What he did was, when he was in the US Air Force, he was assigned, obviously because he's, you know, from the same blood as me, with disgust my military history in excess on this podcast. He was assigned to escort none other than Neil Armstrong and Buzz Aldrin on their world tour with the moon rocks. - What is that? Is that a band that they sing it? (laughing) - Buzz Aldrin in the moon rocks. (laughing) - Sorry. - Now we have to name the band. (laughing) - Ace. - You're gonna get it out of the way in the first 10 minutes. (laughing) - Yeah. All right, okay, that's great, man. Yeah. - Yeah. - I keep on bringing these sort of pearls and celebrity links and all this sort of stuff. You deliver it and nothing. - I don't do it. - It's an example of your mundane world. Or as you have it, it's like, I worked at MTV for half a day once and that's it. - Without me on this podcast, it would be like the parish news, basically. (laughing) - It's been a manifesto. (laughing) - Oh, looks. - Oh, wow. (upbeat music) - Right, okay, we're actually gonna get onto a real genuine agenda item now. I don't know if we're gonna let you go first, right? So tell me about the paranormal radio network. (laughing) It's all right, okay, it usually steer away from and slagging off other podcasts. - Oh, oh dear. - Yeah, but yeah, we've got a podcast while we're in our hands. So. - Is this a podcast? - Yeah, by the way, this is a PR stunt, right? - It could be, but there's a podcast I'll call the Paranormal Radio Network. And it's a British operation. And you know the dodgy because they have a British bulldog on the back of a British flag. - Oh, right, okay, yeah. - Yeah, so already they're in a Brexit you've self-heared at the moment. - Gammon Paranormal Podcast basically. (laughing) - Yeah, it is, yeah, yeah. Daily Mail Paranormal Radio Gammon Network. (laughing) - Okay, all right. - Essentially mate, it's just shite. - Right. - So Devonumerous shows, talk about. - Do you know how I know it's shite? Because I listen to it. the first bullet point in the agenda, it's a bit of a shite. Just because you had to remind yourself to say his shite. Now very much like ourself, it's the all appear to be from Yorkshire. And it's like, like East Yorkshire, a bit of West Yorkshire, but not the Yorkshire. It's quite different, quite different backgrounds then. Yeah. I mean, the amount of UFO coverage and power normal activity you find in Yorkshire is insane apparently. But they're just people like, yeah, they're like horrible hall accents as well, they're like, you know, we're so something flying in the air. I mean, we've had to invest to get this couldn't be an airplane. We've checked on their scarce gunner and all this sort of stuff. That's so grand. It's not from Hollywood. No, but it's just like, there's other things like that goes on like, well, animal mutilations. Like, I don't know about you, but this always seems to be a thing. And the people who discuss it in a fascinated and make animal mutilations, their livelihood, massive wear those is like, you don't just walk and discover an animal mutilation. You have to look somewhere specific. And these animal mutilations, so it's like, it's laser precise or like, it's days, nose, cut out, it's days, cut out to half, it's eyes are off. And like, you know, it's surgically removed and all this sort of stuff. And you know what, there was no blood, there was no blood there, either anything like that. And you think about it with like a forensic said on it's like, you've done no forensic examination. It's a lot of bollocks show me some actual real proof in evidence and photos. Well, the photos are quite just there been in all this sort of stuff. It's all pseudo science bollocks. And then you talk about this creature that's got big red eyes, that one's around your option. Can I just stop you please? I'm not really sure I can do this anymore. I'm really sorry. Because I mean yet again, I don't have the slightest inclination of what you're going on about. Animal mutilation. What's that called do paranormal like the paranormal? Exactly. People like cryptids. What cryptids? If you had have cryptids, no cryptids like Bigfoot, the Mothman, Valleywild. The monster of engines. Yeah, so cryptids are just like monsters that have traveled through like, you know, throughout history. So I've been bogging in and all this sort of stuff. So they're like the old ones like like Kaffirloo and the old gods, you mean? Something like that. Yeah, but this one's somebody in Yorkshire that's bipedal is one of the words that the user all the time. So you could just say it stands on two legs. It's got red eyes, big teeth. It followed me in all this sort of stuff. But, go on, you must have a punchline as to the what the explanation for that could be. I haven't made it to be honest. If you lived in Yorkshire before, you might have been on an evening out and been followed by someone who can barely walk on two legs and has got red eyes and big grabbing hands. That could be anyone in the list. Pretty much. Yeah. So yeah, these cryptids have been, I don't know, attacking sheep and I don't know what the animals we have. They're cows, but apparently there's a lot of dodgy stuff that goes on and on there with this cryptid, but then there's also these lights above the North Sea. You know, they keep on seeing these lights and a tornado aircraft went down there in the late 70s, early 80s or something like that. Back when, I don't know, a lot of us live at East out at the early 2000s or something, but yeah, the tornado jet went down in the sea just off the coast. But, they keep on seeing these lights in the sky and the lights go into the sea. They're also lights above the North Sea, man. It's called the rigs. Yeah, but there's no rich on there. Oh, it's pretty mysterious, but our husband went towards the lights and then two years later our marriage was over. Yeah. Yeah. And they'd, so yeah, they'd reconcile UFO bases on the water in the North Sea and all this sort of stuff. But honestly, the lack of proper scientific evidence that goes along with it. Like, I don't know what it is. It may be a gateway to paranormal dimension or something like that. Science, science, you know, we're doing a critical study of all this. You're like, fuck off. No, you're not. You just talk, you're an absolute driven, yet a proper job. I don't really see why you're so angry, really, because I think let them have their UFO base under the sea and their cryptids go around beating our animals, whatever. And let us have what would Barry White talk like if he was a captain of a submarine. What did Russell Grant have for it? Yeah. I mean, you know, I don't think they really infringing on our turf here, right? No, but you know, it's misinformation. It's fake news. Is it a funny podcast or is it like deadly serious? No, but it's not quite all these. I mean, we've thought we've skirted with hauntings and, you know, my vivid account is something that I'll stand the test of time and scientific accuracy, but so much of this stuff is absolute pithel. It is. Yeah, absolutely. Yeah. What's the law on your on your agenda says something like rendersham? Oh, rendersham. So rendersham is this is the only one that almost seems it could be genuine. So rendersham is in Suffolk. So suffix aim is for big dark skies. No, there's no light pollution. Yeah, okay. So yeah, down itch, which way Peter were around there. There was a partly a UFO incident back in the 80s, where two US, so the US Air Force based on the and these two airmen got basically they witnessed this UFO landing in the middle of the forest and then it sent them a load of digital. It's funny. Binary code. So this guy started writing the binary code down on a pad, such as 1,000, 1,000, 1,000, 1, 1, 1, 1, all that sort of stuff. I can't remember the message that it had, but yeah, but yeah, it's going to be been going on business from like that, but yeah, that's the only one. It's been a really quick game of bingo in 01, for the only office. Yeah, imagine that I'm a the sun that she tell advert that we've just got some aliens. Aliens, aliens, they might be more basic civilizations and then they have only just discovered bingo and this is like their their early version of it, you know. Yeah, I mean, it'll take several, several millennia to develop bingo with more than 10 numbers you might imagine, clingons call it clingo. Okay, anyhow. On its own number one. Not not so not zero house. Dave, you know, was it ready? I sound on its own number one. Again, on its own. Right, ladies and gentlemen, we're going live with the national other. So, tonight the jackpot was shared by seven, seven billion people all winning 0.001 pounds each. And we have a we have a claim on Ragell 7 in the uh the clingon mecca. Yes, we're just verifying that yes, it's going to coug. There we go, inventing a new game. Like let's get the patents office with that one. There's a big market for that. Star Trek is huge, right? So, you know, that's it. In fact, yeah, that gets a tunnel listeners that we just label Star Trek Special. They must be why clingons have that bit on the front of their head. It must be the extra bit of brain required to stamp that big like that marker pen really, really quickly. So, it's going to be the first one to share a house. Yeah, your job. But what is that what is called? - What, the Bingo pens are as, because there's much friction in arguments as what you call a bomb cake. So it's like, it's a dabber, no it's a dabber, no it's a sputter. (laughing) - There must be a cling on word for it. We'll have to find out. - Yeah, okay. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. Spocker. - Let me make a note that, what is the cling on word for Bingo pen? - Right. We get an important share covered today, as I said. (laughing) - And then there's the bunny women of the cling on. We have cling going. (laughing) - The cling on blu-rinces, you mean? - Yeah, cling on, cling on, cling on wings. (laughing) (upbeat music) - I was gonna move onto something else. So I think I might do the song, my song now, right? Because you've been pestering me about performing a song. - I might not really badly pestering me. - I had nothing but positive feedback, right, my singing. - Well, that's the thing is that the threat of you performing another song has really, I had to say has really motivated me into putting one together. Because yeah, yeah. Because it's just the same as the podcast in general. It's just like the amount of effort involved, right? Literally have been writing every evening, perfecting, producing and everything like that. And when you do it, you sort of, I don't know, you just say you sing something. And I'm expected to put everything together. So, you know. - That's weird, yeah. So I assume, the backstory of this song is, it's nothing about me. It's not about you really. - No. - But, however, (laughs) that's probably not the full story. You are linked to it. But I kind of thought, you know, obviously writing original songs is great and everything. Sometimes, you know, sometimes it's good to do a nice kind of cover version, yeah. - Okay. - So I'm thought I'm gonna do a cover version of a bit of an adaptation. And, you know, it's a song that I know you really love. So I thought it's really special just for you, all right? - Ah, man, I'm so. And I've sort of adapted it. I've interpreted the meaning of it a little bit further. You know, what I think is your interpretation of this song. And yeah, I mean, so. (soft piano music) ♪ Summer the day, summer the night ♪ (laughs) ♪ Tomorrow it's autumn all night ♪ ♪ A dream about winter to melt into spring ♪ ♪ Sit on the grass and play with my thing ♪ ♪ Summer the day, summer the night ♪ ♪ Autumn tomorrow it's autumn all night ♪ ♪ I love all the seasons to spring time the most ♪ ♪ Walking around naked under my coat ♪ (soft piano music) ♪ Summer the day, summer the night ♪ ♪ Autumn tomorrow it's autumn all night ♪ ♪ I go to the bingo the oaks love me ♪ ♪ I pull out the balls and show them all the threes ♪ ♪ Summer the day, summer the night ♪ ♪ Autumn tomorrow it's autumn all night ♪ ♪ I love the summer the heat on my skin ♪ ♪ The lights and the siren as the police take me in ♪ (laughs) - There you go. (laughs) Oh, yeah. - There you go mate. (laughs) - Right, present for you. (laughs) - That's not part safe because that's my original work. (laughs) Private collection. (laughs) - Well, you learned. - Yeah. - Isn't it weird you started mentioning bingo in it? - It's really weird. And you even brought that up. It wasn't even me, I don't think so. - Yeah, yeah. - There you go. - Bingo is-- - Lovely, I think I could have sung it better. - Well, you're the original artist, so people might say the original is better. They always do, right? So I think we're gonna be slowing that down for the John Lewis advert. (laughs) - I think so. - It's a beautiful tune, man. I told you, you know. Like normally I slag off anything you do and that's like policy and I don't like deviate from that, but that song really touched me, man. You know? - You know what, I wrote that when I was having a shit once. (laughs) - Really, did you? - Yeah, in the first week of September this year. That was 2019. - 2019, yeah, okay. For some reason, I don't know why, for some reason it said flashing to me, but that was just-- (laughs) - Just the-- (laughs) - Right, so yeah. So I mean, that was a song and that brings me on to singing, because I wanted to talk a little bit about some of the TV that I've watched this in-- - Ooh. - I say this week, but in the last time since we did a recording, so like in the last month and a half, whatever it is. - Hold on a minute, hold on a minute, hold on a minute. Your TV and my TV watching a viewing cab, it's very, very different. - Well, exactly, and you bang on about shit that you've watched like at length all the time. Why, like-- - I deliver a concise synopsis. - It's anopsis. - Well, as the editor of the podcast, I had to sit through that round-based story like, five fucking times to edit it, as well as listen to it when you originally did it. So don't you watch it. - Did you watch it? - Did you watch it? - You're watching it. - No, I've not watched it and I will not be watching it ever. - Yeah. (laughing) If anyone mentions it to me again, I'm gonna instantly punch them. So, obviously in that new RAM view, I'm gonna fuck off. I don't fucking preach you. So anyway, I'll be watching a singing program, which is not, you know, it's not really like me. I'm not an ex-factor kind of person or anything like that. However, yeah, it just sort of ended up on the telly. I don't know if you've seen this program, but have you watched The Masked Singer on ITV? - No, I know what it is, but no, I've not watched this. It's the most fucking weird drug-in-giss shit you could ever imagine, right? Like, I mean, how to describe it? It's like, it's been a lot of a cross between like, you know, the voice, that like anonymous singing program and like Scooby Doo, like because they always like, they'd pull the mask off at the end and see who's behind it, yeah? - Yeah. - The premise is this, right? So they've got, I didn't know, like eight, maybe eight, like anonymous celebrities. And by that, I mean, like, we don't know who they are, not that they're so obscure that, you know, although actually, actually that said, right? (laughing) Like, what's his name? What for me, Stenters, you know, Joan Swash, he's not on it. (laughing) And they have to sing songs to a panel was dressed in this, really, these really elaborate, and in some cases terrifying costumes of like, like, there's like a duck and there's like, like a kind of porcelain doll one that's a bumblebee and everything like that. - Oh, yeah. - And I mean, you would like it, man, because this is a bit like through the keyhole, which is like your kind of wheelhouse, right? Isn't it? Original through the keyhole with Lloyd Grossman, I'm talking about. 'Cause they did this little like video of them at home, but instead of being the home, - A hotel. - Just as themselves, it's them in their costume talking with this like weird voice changing thing. And then they've got to try and guess. Then they sing a song and they've got to try and guess who it is, right? So. - Is Lloyd Grossman on it? - No, he's not on it. - But could if he was. - Well, you imagine who we're seeing in a costume like this. Let's look at the clues. - It is a bit like a submarine periscope and a photograph of Jason Donovan. A naval mo, I don't know, I don't know. - I don't know. - Barry White. (laughing) - But it is as ridiculous as that. Okay, so as an example, and spoiler alert, in case you're gonna want you, right? The other night. And where else can you say this? The other night I sat in my living room on a saturday night and watched a tree singing, yeah. Like a tree like the ones in Lord of the Rings. A tree with a face singing. It's going, oh, we can't sing. Singing lovely day. - Yeah. - Learning day. - The mask taken off is Teddy sharing him. - No way. - Yeah, yeah. Okay, Teddy sharing him. - Oh my God. - How, how ace is that? - He's better than that, sure. - I know, I know Aladdin's school who got caught shocking a tree. (laughing) - Well, and it turned out to be Teddy sharing him. I'll tell you what, I'll tell you what, it would be good for him. It would have been great for Ryan Giggs back when he was like in a bit of trouble, man, because he could have been in the costume and no one would have known who he was, right? - Yeah, exactly. - Super injunction time. It's good for that, but yeah, it's utterly, utterly bizarre. Although I quite like watching it. imagining that the celebrities are sort of being forced to perform against their will inside the costumes. Ty was Teddy the singer. Now he was fucking terrible man, he was awful. And it's not really fair because some of them are like proper singers, right? They're like proper recording artists and stuff like that. And funnily enough they're the ones that are still in it, whereas poor Teddy got sent home because he was shit. Yeah, yeah. He was also Bianca from EastEnders got sent home because he was shit. Yeah. Yeah. Um, there was this, well there was this really awkward moment on it where this guy dressed up as like this loot, this kind of neon chameleon was singing right. And um, Ria Aurora is one of the judges, yeah. And she was throwing out all these guesses of her at Kabin. She was like, oh, this guy's he's really hot guy. You can tell he's in shape, like he's obviously quite, you know, and she's like, oh, I'm getting a bit hot under the collar. He's making me, you know, making me a bit excited. And then the next week he brought like a flower out and gave it to her. Yeah. So she's like, so then they're like, he's going to get on Mars Rita. Who is it? And she, she said she's, she's saying this completely hopeful list of who it could be given that she's flirty that flirty like hell with this guy, right. So she's like, oh, it's obviously Anthony Joshua. Yeah. It's it. Fuck. Like because he obviously needs to be on a singing show where they'll pay you like 30 grand to make a full of yourself. Yeah. Oh, it's going to be Anthony Joshua or um, who else you said she would basically say sportsman, like hot sportsman. Anyway, Mars comes off. It's just in Hawkins, the singer and the dog. And he's like, looking at Rita or like, Robert is hands together going, yeah, I'm up for this. And her face was one of pure or quidness man pure. He's quite funny, man. Yeah, he's quite funny. Yeah, he's he's game. So, you know, but yeah, but she was pretty uncomfortable. She was expecting that knee Joshua. I think it was wishful thinking to be honest. Yeah. Yeah. So then yeah, go on. It just sounds a troll. She's made it's like what else have you been watching? Please tell me it's no other talent show. So we watch this together. In fact, like this is this says a lot about our relationship is that last time we were on a real deal. There we go. We were you and I were on a flight together and true or false. We sat on a flight and watched the RuPaul's Drag Race together. I can confirm that it's true. Yes, it is true. Right. So I've been watching that and I've got a little so the thing that strikes me about RuPaul's Drag Race is that they have the American version, right? I think it was the American version we watched. Yeah, it was. Yeah, it was. Yeah. And and then they did a British version, right? Now, you can imagine the American version is all glam kind of, you know, Vegas kind of yeah, all of this. Whereas the British version is kind of like tin if tin through it did reality TV. Yeah, basically. Sorry. I've got what's on on. Oh, it's on Netflix now. So I watch your Netflix. So the British one. I think the British ones on there as well. Yeah. So no one. So we're going to play a little game, which is I've got the names of some of the contestants and I mean they're like drag names. And you've got a guess whether they're from the US version or the UK version. Okay. Okay. Mystique Summers Madison. American. Okay. That is correct. Yeah. Yeah. Lashorn beyond. Got to be American again. Correct. Okay. Cheryl. Oh. When does Cheryl get and also's channel? Cheryl whole. Yeah. Tell you tell you got to be the English one. Correct. Yeah. Correct. Babies, a horror, a bane. That's definitely American. Yeah. Vinega Stokes. Why are malt? What she gets. Definitely English. Okay. We've got two more. Two more. Right. Sahara Davenport. Oh. That's English. It's not it's American. Yeah. Like that from port. Yeah. Like. Well, yeah. Okay. I think of two people who have that name or similar names. One's American and one's English, but we won't do it. Yeah. Sahara Jones and this is the last one. This is the last one and this one's really difficult. Okay. Right. So British or American. I can't say it. Bag of chips. Vinega Stokes and Bag of chips. Yeah. Yeah. This is very sort of. Chip, chip shop thing to this. Do you see what I mean? Yeah. I mean, the other's then pie bar. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So, oh, you're always seven. Do you want it wrap love or do you want to try? Do you want it open? Do you want to open or wrapped? Oh, sorry, man. Jeez. But what I noticed about that programme was saw that the contestants are absolutely stoners. Yeah, they are. Yeah. Beautiful. Just like how it's about sausage and chips would grab me. They're like beautiful. Yeah. Yeah. If they were on the menu, it'd come in a silver tray. It's like a blind date. Not presumably. There's a blind date. So I'll question if I took you to the chippy. What would be on it? What would you order? And that's a question for number three. Let's move on. It's hard to have really difficulty here. It's probably all that vinegar that's doing it to me. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Well, vinegar, I think vinegar in like young person's parlance is like like throwing shade, isn't it? What's throwing shade? Okay. Like being a twat to someone. Oh, right. Well, giving a vinegar. I don't know. I just thought it was a reference to when Christ was crucified on the cross on our good Friday. To quenches Thursday was given a sponge for a vinegar. Really? Is that is that why people go to the chippy on a Friday? I never knew that every day is a school day. Can you type me sponge up? Yeah, I mean, I sponge with vinegar would be quite useful for getting a really nice finish on your car windows. Have you put vinegar on some bird? No. Those are trick. What do you mean? In what sense? Makes you want to go the chippy. And you forget about your sunburn. Yeah. It brings the town out. I like it. Okay. I never knew that. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Next time you sunburke, you may call and one of the other ones you're like kissing around and when you've been a bottle of sarsans. Is it mad when you do like salt and vinegar? Like when you start putting it on the deathly silence that is going to it is the liquid in the vinegar bottle going on over the pledge. It's just like. And like you do it as if it's like a proper like a sous chef of delivering the vinegar on the food. It's beautiful. Beautiful. Maybe that's why vinegar strokes is on one brew pool's drag race. And maybe she had an all natural tan that really got shone shone over everyone as these fake ones. And what her secret was vinegar on it. My sponsored by sarsans and other vinegar providers are available. I have absolutely no fucking clue who else makes vinegar. No, it's a monopoly. Yeah, very nice. Right. So moving on. You want to talk about and I assume you're your two agenda items and your third one was there in case we have time. So I'm going to let you talk to me about the Mandela effect. Okay so again it comes with this paranormal thing that's been percolating through my my viewing, my listening, my reading, all my research. So the Mandela effect is it goes where people have different recollections of a certain event. So why it's called Mandela effect is a lot of people believe Nelson Mandela snuffed it in the late 80s as opposed to the early 2000s. Yeah, like I thought. Yeah, yeah, so yeah. So people are adamant that he died and they remember seeing it seen it on the news and things like that and reading all about it. But it turns out he died. When did he die? I was in Berlin. Oh, well that helps. 2013 it might be. Well let's let's look. I'm going to just switch Wikipedia from Ripple's Drag Race to Nelson Mandela. A frequent user experience in their website. He died in. Do you know what 2013 well done. There you go. Nelson Mandela's Drag Race. Man. Man, do you that with Winnie Mandela? No, don't go there either. Honestly, you don't slag off or make make lights of Nobel Prize winners on this show. We got more class on my bucket list. That's on my bucket list. No, it's not. We've done your bucket list on this show. Everyone knows what it is. Oh, you got a new Ripple's Drag Race series too. You're not going to beat the twins that are going on it though. Don't they're in gyms twice? Baby, when you've been with me, you'll be looking at your fingers. So if you got with us, make sure you put on extra chilesas because you're in for a nice hot steamy passion. And then they present a podcast about the power of it. That was the same voice literally. That's my repertoire. I've got a few voices. Jodie, that Yorkshire one. Horoscope reading. Harry's. And an American one. So this the wrecking, it's peoples remembering things differently. It's just a psychotic order. However, there is a rumor that in 2012, when they fired up the soon collider. Large, had drunk collider in a in dioric, which was the principal of it was to discover the Higgs Bowson God particle. But in doing so, it could have exposed that matter. And in what comes from that would be the creation of a black hole. Now, one of the things they obviously has been discussed on the paranormal radio network is that when that cracked open, it created a black hole, we passed through to it instantly into another dimension where the timeline was completely different to the one that we'd existed in. So, there are peoples memories of things that were totally different. So, the example is that people give, though, and this is where it really starts to piss me off. They're all about popular culture, most particularly about films and TV and products like, you know, Oreos and the Ford symbol and things like that. The Forest Gump was, what's it, life is like a box of chocolates. I don't know. I've not seen it, mate. You don't see Forest Gump? No. I didn't watch the line. I don't watch Suffolton, I'm actually, no. What does he say? What's the thing? What's the thing? So, everyone says life is like a box of chocolates. But it's life was like a box of chocolates. Oh, sorry. That's an example. So, you're telling me, because of Surn opening a black hole in the course of a particle acceleration experiment that warped the entire reality, like the landscape of reality, like, and murdered, murdered timelines together and created new off-tuked timelines and altered people's memories that the syntax of a line from a really shit film was remembered slightly and that's the exact one. I'm so glad you've now subscribed to my youtube channel. Oh dear. The other one is in Star Wars with that, mate. It's all about films. Yeah, it is. Like, Luke, I am your father. That doesn't get said. It's like, no, I am your father. It doesn't even say Luke. But like, it's just like, it's an attraction of like a stylized representation of the line. It's not the actual line, right? Yeah, exactly. So, people are only going about, you know, this man-to-hour effect. It's just, you know, it's changed for a kind of different time of dimension and things like not once have they ever quoted a political policy that may have been different or may have changed or, you know, there's something around the Viet Namwo or like everyone's legs are fucking arms. Yeah. Or like everything's upside down or, you know, something like not people like two lines in films were said slightly differently to what you remember. Yeah. Yeah, and the bulbs are now bollocks. Yeah, yeah, yeah, that sort of thing, you know, no, it just comes down to TV and product references. Like, there wasn't a high fin between Kit Kat and all this sort of stuff. And the fuck exactly. And it really annoys me. And again, it just takes science that people, you know, spouting and people start to believe it. When you first said it, I did think maybe it's the Mandela effect is the reason why on Tim fruit, we keep thinking people have died in the early 2000s, right? I mean, it sounds like that's exactly what it is, but that could be genuine. Although I did think, right, so David, let me pass the way last year. I was adamant. That was about 20 years ago when he died. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. I remember, I remember him dying, vividly. So he was doing a nate spoken. And there we are. We've got a lovely, lovely, little budget. And then he pulled the gun out of blue his own head off on live TV live TV, very vivid. And then, you know, John Crave incident. What are you saying? Is this should be called the Bellamy effect? Why not? It should be, but like, you know what I mean? It's like, no, I'll give it my Mandela. Like, yeah, you know, I was adamant, Bellamy, it's not that I vividly remember and fight all all his guts are over the blue Peter garden and that and then yeah, it just got to neighbours. Exactly. Well, like, that is that's the sort of thing that could have happened in a dark alternative reality, like an event horizon, like reality, you know, like, yeah. I'm being the other side of black hole and David Bellamy is blowing his brains out in the blue Peter garden and then carries on presenting. Yeah. Just the spinal cord. Tom Hanks actually says life was a box of chocolates instead of is a box of chocolates. Yeah, or David Bellamy's in Forest Camp Life was like a boxer to your clik- in the underground. I would have watched it if he was. So there you go. Yeah, that'd be pretty good as well, say. Bellamy is gump. I mean, speak to the guys at certain, like, that's all I can say. I mean, no, I'm not asking to say, hey, excuse me, can you come on? Yeah, that's going to help you. Right, remember the question of sport. Do you remember when, yeah, they're incorrectly the answer to who won the 1987 Leacock Final was incorrectly awarded a point on questing the sport back in 1995. These can use your, part of your large Hadron Collider to change that so that the point was fairly not awarded. Oh, no problem. No problem, sir. Okay, here we go. And then you come out of it and you can't bolus for it. Butterfly effects, man. Like you can bolus for it. Bill Boehmann and Married. Yeah, I don't understand. David Coleman still alive. Yeah. Is he not alive? No, Coleman. Sorry. Christo, don't be like Christo. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, it's 2000s or think. Yeah. I think so as well. Yeah. Right. Listen, that's going to be it. It seems to have gone really quickly, but, you know, we're at 50 or minutes. So, you know, um, well. We covered a lot of ground, man. Oh my God. What? When did Mandala die? 2013 when you were in Berlin. Yeah. David Coleman, 2013. That's obviously when it happened, right? It's like, it's like the epicenter. It's like the, you know, it's like when Doc Brown says that, oh, 1985 is like the, like, yeah, the epicenter of the time of the top of the timeline is converging. That's obviously what happened. Well, I think that the boss maybe Mandala and Coleman got sucked into vortex and, you know, their rulers of another one. What actually happened was. You went to Berlin at the same time as the one of the chief scientists at certain, right? And you've done some really a really trivial thing like treading in a puddle, getting out of the taxi. You got to the hotel reception for him. And you've got a better room, right? Whereas his room. He only had a single bed and he didn't sleep, particularly well and messed up his presentation, the following night, the following day. And as a result, he, he was demoted or he didn't get the promotion. He was after. And since then he's been vengeful. Well, that Mandala effect is proper. I remember David Coleman coming out of Robin Ireland. I'm walking out and free. And then he became president of South Africa. So I mean, Tim fruit's blown the little things guys. I mean, as listen to your experience in this here and now live, right? You know, we haven't uncovered it fully. We'll do more research, but we know it has something to do with David Coleman. Bellamy and possibly who else? You heard it here. Have a great day. Three bubbles to the left, baby, three bubbles to the right.