Johnny Pemberton

Hi, it's Rick Glassman from this podcast. We'll get right to the show, but first I wanted to let you know that I'm on my stand-up comedy tour, Ricky's on the Loose, and I'm in Dallas this weekend. And if you're in Washington, D.C., Montreal, Quebec, Edinburgh, or London in the UK, Portland or Eugene in Oregon, Philadelphia, PA, or Houston, Texas, my tickets are for sale now at rickglassman.com. And if you want to be the first to be notified when I'm coming to your city because I'm adding dates as we speak, go to rickglassman.com slash tour, sign up for my email list, and I'll let you know. Hey girls, get started without me. I'll be right there. Hurry up, Rick, seriously, what are you doing? Please, I'll be right there. Now enjoy the show, the show, the show, the show, the show, the show. Microphone check. So bright. Hey, dude. Oh, two text messages. One from our guest, Johnny Pepperton, and two from alum Sal Vulcano. Shout out to Sal Vulcano for a season 13 pickup that just got announced of Impractical Jokers. Johnny is here. I wonder if he's going to be in his full fallout makeup. Oh, that would be cool. Oh, hello. Welcome. Sweetie. Welcome to one of the biggest podcasts in LA. I think it's the biggest. I do too. It's not one. Is it one of our? No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. It's okay. It'll be bigger if, if, um, if you could just keep on the blanket. What if I put it on the floor? At this point, I just think keep it on the blanket. What about this? I don't want to sit on that. I don't blame you. Is that a beaver? Beaver? Virgin over here is lax like they've never seen a beaver before. All right. Let's get this over with, huh? Yeah. I only have about 20 minutes. Scoop doo. Blubbity blue. Scoop dee. Oh, yeah. With the microphone and where you think you're going to be. That's good. I like that. You want to do it like this? Like that? Like a sound mic? Like I'm like, you know, like a singer? Yes. Do you want to do this, bitch? I want to make you, bitch. Something like that. Yeah. That's my dream. Can I have some, uh, what do you call it? Water? Yeah. I was trying to think of a better word for water. What do they call it sometimes? They call it, um, they call it like a, not a refreshment, but a. Beverage. A beverage. Something to wash it down with. There's a thing, not vittles. Vittles are great. I don't know those. I mean, oh, I actually, I have a vittle that I really like. What could you put into a barrel to make it lighter? Um, a hobbit. Yes. A hobbit. You could put a hobbit in there because hobbits are, they're super, they're so, um, joyful. They're light. The answer is a hole. Oh, that's the answer. I think I need a, um, there's other stuff too. Oh wow. You've got, um, alcohol, like one alcohol. Yeah. I don't drink alcohol. So I just put one in your. You got one alcohol? Is it, is it a non-alcoholic alcohol? No, it's a Stella. I also have a Mike Hart's lemonade, I think in the other fridge. Um, I have a water and I have one of those mega mines. Took an edible last night and I think I'm still high. This episode is sponsored by factor. Factor meals is a delicious way of getting your nutrition. At a convenient way. Head to factor meals.com slash Tyso 50 off and use code Tyso 50 off to get 50% off and free daily greens per box with new subscription only while supplies last until September 27th of this year. See website for more details. Factor. Brent, do you know there's a new movie from the creator of John wick and nobody? What? Yeah. It's a new movie called normal, a double barreled shotgun blast of pure mayhem. Get out of here. Not with Bob Odenkirk, Henry Winkler and whoever the else. Well, you know, Hedy, that's right. And you could see it in theaters starting April 17th. Uh, we're going to do some, uh, underdog sports. Oh, thank God. But we're leaving. I always have time for underdog sports. That's what I'm talking about. This episode is sponsored by under dog fantasy and thank you. Underdog fantasy. Make picks, win money, download the app today and use promo code Tyso 50 to score $50 in bonus entries. When you play your first. Five dollars. That's promo code. Tyso. Tyso. Terms apply. Seaside for details. Hey, real quick. Yeah. Thank you very much for sitting through the ads. One more quick thing. I want to say Ricky's on the loose. I'm doing my hour. I would love for you to come. If I'm coming to one of your cities, let me tell you real quick. And this month I'm in Austin, Texas, may. I'm in Cleveland, Ohio and Irving, Texas, June. I'm in Washington, DC, September. I'm in Portland and Eugene, Oregon and Philadelphia, PA. And in October I'm in Houston, Texas. You can get tickets or. Sign up for my email list to find out when I'm coming near your city at Rick Glassman dot com. I got a new website. Let me just say this at the top of Rick Glassman dot com. You'll see there's a link to links because we take your shoes off. We're just nominated for two Webby awards. The voters get to pick for the voters choice. If you wouldn't mind clicking on one or both of those links to vote for take your shoes off. Would appreciate it. Either way. Enjoy the rest of this episode. Max. This is scary. Max. What's in it? What maximizes it? It's just extra caffeine. I think it's time released. So it lasts longer. Did you do this now? That's what I do now. Listen, I do a trick. Yes, it's this. It's this. Do you find that it helps if you open your mouth when you do it? Yeah. Try closing your mouth and looking at it. I can't see. I was new thing when I close my mouth. Yeah, it's harder to see my eyes close at the same time. Oh, so ask me to do it again. Ready? Hold on. I'll be ready in a minute. Okay. Not ready yet. Pissing in it. Yeah, I'm ready. Okay. That's a lot. That was a big key. I'm going to reclaim my brain. You know, this podcast oftentimes takes a pretty long time to start, you know? Haven't we started? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That's what I'm saying. And I like this. I like showing the little behind the scenes, you know? But. Yeah, I like it too. I do like behind the scenes. Sometimes I get comments that say, the episode starts at 10 minutes. And it's like, no, it doesn't. But doesn't that give that person something to do is to say that? You're a job creator. You're a job creator, man. Let me hear you sing something. I'm a job creator. We're job creators. Can I hear you sing something, please? Sing? Yeah. Tap this first. I'm excited to make the book. I'm excited to make the book of Job into a film. The book of Job. It's the book of Job. Is that Mormon thing? Or is that from Arrested Development? I think it's neither. It's just literally a book of the Bible. It's spelled like Job, but people say Job because that's his name. It's the name of the guy. You can't drink half of this, can you? I mean, it's like saying Pringles. You can't just have one, right? Or is that Ruffles? I think it's Pringles. Once you pop, you can't stop. Yeah, Ruffles. Ruffles have ridges. Ruffles have ridges. Ruffles have ridges, too. Ruffles have. Pringles don't. I mean, what level are we talking about here? No, I'm just saying, that's the saying. Isn't it Ruffles have ridges, too? No, it's Ruffles have ridges also. Is it? Damn! Oh, I thought you drank both of them. Oh, that would be scary. That would be very scary. I once accidentally drank one of those Magic Mind extended release extra strength caffeines at nighttime. What time at nighttime? Like, when I was going to bed, 11 something. Okay, right before bed? Yeah, but they have a sleep one with herbs to help you kind of relax, which I like, and I take a lot. I often take. Take a lot sounds like a drink, a lot of them, as opposed to often taking them. And I took the other one, and as I was swallowing it, I thought in my head, I heard, oh, no. Have you ever done. I did that with prescription drugs once. I took a Vyvanse instead of a sleeping pill. What's Vyvanse? It's like a. It's like a. Less intense Adderall. It's a time-release Adderall. This was years ago. I took one, and I was like, oops. I was up all night. What'd you do? I think I played Call of Duty for about four hours, and I crushed. I just fucking destroyed. Because it couldn't. You can't. You cannot sleep. You just cannot sleep, you know? My aunt used to have a problem going to sleep, and I found out that she was eating this gum that has nicotine in it. She didn't know. It was like a. Stimulate gum. She just had gum, like, just some random gum that had nicotine in it? Yeah, it was branded as, like, energy or something. But, like, she didn't even see that it said energy in it. But that's not over-the-counter. I think so. Where? Like, in. Maybe, I guess it can't be with nicotine? I don't know. I don't know. Sounds like I just broke your. Maybe she got online? I think I just broke your story. You're going to text her, aren't you? I'm going to call her and ask. Call her. Thank God you're calling, not texting. Why do you say that? Because I think we do that a lot now. We text someone. Like, you know what, I'm gonna ask Bill, i'm gonna ask bill hey bill i'm gonna you know what i'm gonna text bill right now i'm gonna text bill bill is it true that you did have sex with um marjorie taylor green in college you know i guess so oh wait hold on a second wow this is high tech man hi ricky was that an answer is that she hates when i cough i'll try her again that's your aunt yeah you just hung up on her i coughed ricky hey sorry about that somebody else coughed that was me oh okay uh i'm on my podcast right now and i'm telling a story we're talking about like taking accidentally caffeine before bed or vivance instead of something else i don't know i was bored bored with this story but right you took you took uh sorry i coughed you know i hung up for the bit but she's not for these kinds of jokes and i just hung up on her twice and i'm gonna apologize could she even hear me or how is this i think so how who knows what do you think you're being kidnapped or something now man oh two cups has been forwarded to voicemail two cups i'm screwed up all right i guess damn man that's not wow what if you need to what if that was like an ai thing you were being you know spoofed or um what's it called like she you were having your voice that thing the scammers do now where they take someone's voice obviously your voice is out there enough they could make a model of you to be so accurate if they called up anyone you knew you'd be like rick and you know that's what's happening right she's probably calling the cops right now probably calling the fbi you do voices pretty well could i hear you try hi i'm rick and i like calling my aunt and i'm like hey you're calling me aunt until i cough that was good that was great good times did you learn how to do voice stuff because of fallout no uh i don't know what do you mean by voice stuff it's like butt stuff the way you just did my voice uh no i did not learn to do that from fallout i think that was something i learned to do as a child maybe maybe you know because that's like a fun thing to do when you're little she calling you back no but i did have a dream last night that uh i don't remember what it was but walter goggins was in it walton walton no not the guy from your show buddy i went to school with oh that's a cool that's a that's a yeah what are you doing the dream i don't remember that sucks man when you have a dream about someone do you call them or text them to tell them the dream i don't text people i just like to call well okay that's not answering the question at all a little bit i did i did i put call in there i wasn't the question wasn't do you call or text not not it's not a guarantee i have let's say i have a dream about you last night where it's like oh i rick i saw you and you were like in a panda suit and we were on an old-fashioned 1800s train and then um you know a bomb went off but you were fine like if i had that dream about you and i remembered it when i woke up i would definitely tell you that call or text i would probably text it's so impersonal yeah but it's so it just depends on the person obviously but i i pretty much i would say about 80 of the time i tell someone a dream unless it's like you know i haven't talked to them in a while i don't want to come out of the blue and be like hey i'm dreaming about you you know what i mean yeah you know when when a girl tells me she dreams about that's different that's a totally different thing hold on there's two versions of that and there's more but the two main versions are it's romantic or it's not you mean i mean you mean erotic not necessarily because oh i had a dream about you when we were holding hands and it was really sweet i wouldn't call that erotic but it does like oh i think i think this girl is interested in making out at least that's the entryway to eroticism yeah yeah so sometimes you know not all women have dreams about somebody they want to have sex with and the dream is sex the dream could be seeing if they want to have sex because that seed just was planted yeah so what are you saying though so when so sometimes like someone say i had a dream about you and when they tell you what the dream is then you know but sometimes i had a dream about you and they don't tell you what the dream is and it almost feels a little flirtatious and now what am i supposed to say what was it yeah that definitely is what that is i think that's what that is when that when a woman says i had a dream about you and she doesn't say what it was i say uh i say um that's not my business if anybody says that at all it's flirt so if i texted you and i said i had a dream about you and i didn't tell you what it was you would think i was flirting with you um not you know if i if i texted you instead of calling you would you be mad do you think that we'd have a fallout no because you haven't called me in a long oh that's is that like six seven for you is that like the you think that's six seven for me right is saying that that word fall yeah i'm supposed to go oh oh oh you me you me oh oh does this mean like you and me like same oh same this means like same right i sometimes say the same thing but i don't know if it's the same thing or they say stuff and right after i say it i think to myself what a wonderful world like is that like satchmo meets um like a borscht belt guy who's what's satchmo uh louis armstrong his name is satchmo that was his nickname yeah i didn't know that lewis armstrong actually technically it's lewis armstrong speaking of armstrong do you like the office the show yeah i did i did i can do that i have a long sleeve you have the camera it's the gym cam like you know how jim in the office looks to camera oh yeah jim hey on my camera pam i remember that show why am i wearing headphones why are you wearing headphones because we were calling my aunt but i also find it i'll tell you something before you take them off people say do i have to wear headphones there's always whatever you preference i now prefer if at least for some of the time both i and the guest wear headphones okay because watch take them off yeah the so the my whole thing is that if you're gonna tell me about a dream you better make it the full thing don't pull any punches it's actually okay with headphones off with you yeah it's great because you know projecting um yeah i dated a girl who's really good at that projecting yeah projecting uh stuff onto you or like physically or uh she was a broadway singer oh right that's that's whole thing i don't have therapy do you have a strong voice you think strong you know like you can like if you want to do like this you can do it if you want to be like yeah hey you can't park there hey you can't park there hey you can't park there i like you but you can't park there sorry my mother's she's at the dentist she's coming back she's coming back she's late but i would i would love if you parked how about this okay there's a guy he thinks this is a car driven by a man so he's pissed but he sees it's a beautiful woman so he changes his tone hey you can't park there actually i guess you can um i'm so sorry if you need to park park my mother she's come i like that a lot thank you can i try it yeah you can try it i don't do uh voices very well but i'm gonna try that's an accent that's a boston you got a little jewish for a little but it was mostly boston uh yeah i guess so isn't that a thing when people are speaking boston they say park the car i can't do boston that was not boston what was that it was like you know generic new york that's why it sounded a little jewish for a little bit you're like hey you can't park there you know you can park there a little bit but you know you did a little of that but i think italians in new york are almost jewish like there's like a crossover that's in my experience with the people that i know friends of mine that's italian though that's what i'm saying there's a trying to feed a friend it's the same right isn't it it's very similar yeah sebastian maniscalco has a joke about family and feeding and stuff where where i know that a lot of jewish people share it because that bit went viral on facebook and it's because we're talking about he's italian but it was very jewish yeah but isn't that more culturally like new york culture not so much hey buddy sorry you can't park there yeah you can't park there because it says reserved only only sorry about that it's fine sorry i raised my voice you're not supposed to park there you're already there it's no problem just next time um yeah just next time don't park there wow he likes her i think i just had deja vu oh an agent may have just entered the matrix and that agent is uh hugo weaving a great actor how did you know that because i know about stuff in the entertainment industry when we walked in we had an entertainment industry conversation and you even said to me how did you know that do you remember no i forgot when i said good afternoon and i said good afternoon yeah and you said you clocked it as um tyler perry yeah and you're like how did you know that because i don't know that's to me it's not exactly your your like zone is it i i love of Meet the Blacks. - Okay. - This is everything you need to know. And that's what I love about all-wheel drive. It's something where, you know, if you have a limited slip differential, you're always going to have traction. We're talking positraction. Positraction, oof. Right? I met her once, and she was nice to me, and it was like, I carried it with me for a good year. It's one of my favorite movies. Oh, it's one of the greatest. Yeah, absolutely. I haven't watched it in a long time, though. I'm sorry, what? The Utes? Utes? I'm sorry, Your Honor. Utes. That's a good Pesci that you just did. Is it? No, it's not. Yeah, I think it was. I mean, I don't think I would mistake you for Joe Pesci. You would not. I would hope not. But do it again. Will you do some? Utes. No, before. Say it with the Utes. Utes. These two Utes. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Did you say Utes? I'm sorry. Did you say Utes? Utes. Dude. These two Utes walked into a bar. These two Utes. Good movie. Yeah. You see a little deer? A little deer walks over to a little brook, takes a little sip. And then, bam! His head's blown off. Do you think he gives a flying fuck what kind of pants a son of a bitch was wearing? Something like that. Is that Marissa Tomei? Yeah. I haven't seen that movie in a very long time. But I think I've seen enough clips of it to remember. Who's posting clips? People on the internet. From my cousin Vinny? Like, you know, you're on YouTube and sometimes someone pops up. And it's like a clip of Marissa Tomei in the witness stand. And she's, you know, she's looking good. She's looking good. She's looking good. Yeah, would you let her park there? Yeah, if Marissa Tomei pulls up in any kind of car, I'm going to let her park there. Anybody from the South knows you get stuck in the mud. One tire keeps going. The other one just lays there. Positive traction. My uncle was. What are we doing here? Just bad impressions of a movie that we don't remember the close to. From 20 plus years ago. What was that? 25 years ago? 28? That would be my guess. That's an ancient movie. When did My Cousin Vinny come out? You calling your aunt again? You'll need to unlock your iPhone first. Call your aunt and ask her that. Tell her you got a gun to your head. Oh my God. These things are just. Just kill me. Hey Siri, just kill me. 92. That's a long time ago, man. So what's up with you and Ella Purnell? We work together. Well, sometimes we do. I heard it was more than that. From who? Um, I guess I have seen her outside of work. Yeah. Would you call her? She's probably. Well, she's in London though. So it's probably. What time is it in London? It is eight hours ahead. Seven hours ahead now. Do you want me to call her for real? We could call her. You trying to get on the podcast? I would love to. Let's see. It's 8 p.m. It's worth a try. I'm having dinner now. Okay. The Londoners have dinner. You called me. Who called you? You called me. Oh, you called me to tell you. I just want to tell you about a dream. Yeah. I'm not going to call. If I call. If you don't feel comfortable. It's not about comfort. No, it's fine. Hey. Definitely not now. Why? I thought I had a sneeze. Because you just did the chicken thing. No, when I. Yes, you did the chicken thing. That's the chicken thing. And that's like the George McFly trigger. If you get triggered by chicken, that means you are chicken. It's like, you know what I mean? And it sounds like you're getting triggered by it. And it was the Marty McFly trigger. Yeah, Marty McFly. What did I say? You said George. I mean, it's the McFly family. They are very different. Which one's George McFly? George and Marty are some of the. George is the dad. George is the dad. The difference between George and Marty, father and son, tell me a bigger difference between father and son where they still have a relationship with each other in any other movie further away than that from the personality types. I think I'm just so obsessed with the Crispin Glover thing of it all. You know, him getting. Crispin Glover from Like Mike? He was George McFly, right? He was also the orphanage. foster care villain in Like Mike. Like Mike? Yeah, where Lil Bow Wow finds Michael Jordan's shoes and makes it into the NBA and he plays for the Knights. What, have you been living under a rock? Swipe over. I mean, I would like to live under a rock, like a big rock, like a huge rock that you could have like, you know. It's kind of like where they didn't fall out. Yeah. It's like a little drinking game we're playing right now at Dings. Yeah. That'd be fun. I love that show, man. You do? Love. It's a great show. It's a great show. I think it's very good. And I think a lot of people like it a lot. I like it. You had a bigger role in the second season. I mean, by what metric? By me looking and noticing how much story you had in season two than season one. Maybe I'm wrong. Am I wrong? I just, when I saw season two. When I saw season one, I'm like, oh, Johnny's in that a little bit. In season two, it felt like you were. Even if you weren't driving all the main stories, you were integrated into them. I guess so. Yeah, I guess I never really look at it that way. But I mean, I love. I like being a part of it. It's super fun. And in the Magitek armor? I don't know what it's called in the movie, but in Final Fantasy, that's what it's called. It's called the Power Armor. Yeah. I was in the Power Armor for a little bit. Yeah. But I wasn't actually in it, which is nice. And I could tell sometimes it had your voice when you couldn't see your face in it. But I heard you improvising. Like, I'm like, oh, that's Johnny. That's Johnny doing this thing. Yeah. There was a scene in the cafeteria that I was like, oh, he's improvising. I think so. Maybe a little bit. You'd be surprised. There's a lot of stuff where. That's always the question people always ask. So, is there a lot of improv? That's like the question. You know what I mean? That's the first question people always ask. Not me. Not you, because you are beyond. What's that? You are beyond. Isn't that you are farmers? We are farmers. We are farmers. No, it's we are farmers, but they took that from you are. I'm getting a lot of corrections from this corner. I'm getting a lot of piped in corrections here. George McFly. We are farmers. We are farmers. You are farmers. You know, you are farmers. That's what it should be. You are farmers. We are farmers. I think we includes the you. Not if you don't say it. We are sitting on the couch. We are not. You're sitting in a chair. We are sitting in this room. Yeah. I am. You are. We are. You ever say something like we are seated? You know, because. It's like an old way to say it. Do you ever want to do that? Go back to the. We are seated. Like, please be seated or. They were seated. Where were they? Instead of saying, oh, they were sitting in that chair. You say, they were actually seated in the Davenport on the southwest corner. Yeah. I guess I would like to go back to like being able to talk like that, but can we? We can, but I think language is kind of getting. I think the language is getting a little bit. It's not even a word for it anymore. It's getting. It's getting abused, maybe. It's getting bastardized, changed. Like Jon Snow. Like Jon Snow. Jon Snow. That would be a cool thing to do when you have like a catchphrase is shake your bottle. You've seen those videos about women in the office with their iced coffees? It's that. It's also this. Like the big venti Starbucks iced coffee. The. If they don't have a. Oh, sorry. You weren't interrupting gold or anything. I'm like, how dare you? I have some really good. Go for it. Go for it, dog. If they don't have a lid on that coffee, I wonder if some of the ice might fall out. I thought about committing to that and doing it with the water. Just really sloshing that shit around here and causing an outburst. You know, a full-on outburst. And having the coffee fall out. I like that song. What's that from? It's from this commercial with J.K. Simmons. Oh, We Are Farmers. Should we call him right now? Let's put him on a three-way with Ella. Wait, could we go golfing with J.K. Simmons, Ella Purnell, you and I? You and me? I'm calling J.K. right now to ask him if he wants to go golfing. And me? He's going to not like this. Well, then don't do it. Wait, why are you friends with J.K. Simmons? We did a TV show together years ago. What show was he in? Oh, yeah, yeah, Superstar. Superstore. No, not Superstore. Well before Superstore. Was. Oh, then what show were you in? Before Superstore. Son of Zorn? No, well before that. It was called. What was it called? It was called. Oh, my God. What was it called? It was called. I'm telling you the language, man. It wasn't called White Van, man. It was called. Jesus Christ, I can't remember the name of it. It was me and Leah Remini. Why don't you just call him and ask him the name of it? And then if things go well, we can invite him golfing. Okay, I'll call him. Here, let me give you this. Is it going to plug into this one? Is it the new one? It's the new one. Don't worry about it. Put it on speaker, though. Okay. Family Tools? Yeah. Oh, but see, I was going to ask JK that. Ask him. Family Tools. But I kind of think of a follow-up. Okay, I'll invite him to this screening. Okay. I should invite him anyways, actually. But I don't want to do it publicly because then people who aren't invited aren't going to know about it. And they're going to show up. But this is going to be out after that. We'll bleep where it is. Okay. This is fun, man. Honestly, this is like. I don't know one of the movies I've seen more than anything else is Drumline. This is getting me out of my. it's true here we go it's a different movie but it's true he's not gonna answer do you think he's filming The Accountant 3 um no I don't think he's I'm honestly I'm kind of nervous to be honest he's not gonna he's not answering can you leave a message go ahead and leave me a good old fashioned voicemail that sounds so good and if it's important also text me because the voicemail alerts don't always work thanks hey JK it's Johnny Pemberton uh I was gonna text you but I decided to call you because my friend Rick Glassman is here right now and he's goading me into calling you live on this podcast throwing me under the bus there yeah I just threw him under the bus um hey I want to invite you to the screening I'm having next week if you're in town I will text you the information but I'm calling because you know we're both uh we can do that okay I'll talk to you later man bye I'm like a I'm like a high school girl like calling her crush just now because like I broke down at the end you know what I mean like there's a bunch of girls laughing in the back like oh my god they're calling him they're calling him do you think you guys might have a falling out not at all no he's he's a great guy he's a wonderful guy super nice classic case of a guy who's very nice but you know his his demeanor is it pushes away bullshit you know what I mean like it's kind of brusque did you hit that by accident Freud says that nothing happens by accident Freud said that Freud said that Freud said that did you mean to say that twice I want to do a spit take so bad if it's then do it but do it on you just drool it out I'll give you a drool tag ready yeah live my life you can save it and do it later okay you have to okay as soon as I take a sip of water you say Freud said that okay ready okay Freud said that there are you didn't I was letting you get more water I'm a professional okay I've done this so many times drool takes yes ready Freud said that there are no accidents everything is about come wait a minute Freud said that factor this episode is sponsored by factor I got my mom into factor and though I eat it sometimes my mom eats it every week she loves it and I want to see if we can get her on the phone cause it's the factor hi darling mom I have a question for you yeah if I were to say hey I think I'm gonna get some food what are you in the mood for what would you say well you know what I would always say what's that pizza but if it was something that you already had in your fridge that was meal prep what would you say oh I would say factor cause I keep it in my freezer all the time and just so people at home know mom did I call you and tell you that I was calling you to talk about factor and I can swear on everything holy that you did not I had no clue that's what you were gonna do but the truth is is that I want pizza and if it had to be something that's in my house it would be factor cause that's the only food I keep you know it's interesting that you say that because they don't I guess you could keep it in there but when you get the meals delivered to you they are fresh and never frozen over 100 rotating weekly meals including globally inspired flavors like Mediterranean and Asian so there's always something new to look forward to mom Brent is here hey hun who's here Brent hi Brent hi love bomb how are we uh oh phone was taken away I'd like to ask a question here sure yes sir maybe factor can come out with pizza my favorite of theirs well there's so many but my favorite of theirs is their pasta so they do have Italian but I don't but I've never seen pizza mom check this out try the new newly launched ready to eat salads with vibrant ingredients like elat corn I don't know if I'm saying that right and miso edamame plus 70 plus add-ons to round out your nutrition from green juice to peanut butter energy bites and real quick factor factor and then ready you know that they have breakfast and they have desserts and they have protein drinks you do know that right like ready to eat in two minutes always always always ready in two minutes head to factormeals.com slash tiso 50 off and use code tiso 50 off to get 50% off and free daily greens per box with new subscription only while supplies last until September 27, 2026 mom guess what if you want to see more details you can see their website you're making me hungry and we're gonna get pizza love you bye Brentie love you this episode is sponsored by underdog fantasy hey dad yeah Rick I know you know this but I'm letting people at home know that playing underdog is easy you just pick whether your favorite players will go higher or lower on stats like points, rebounds, steals and more and if you get your picks right now you could win up to 5,000 times your cash Brent make a pick well I would say that Jalen Brunson is gonna score quite a few points that guy will probably be higher than 20 points and you'll win your play yes we love to play now if Brent wins his play do you think that'll help dad it looks like it looks like it looks like he's going he's going lower than the points and Brent picked him higher because he is sweating up a storm right now I'm sweating because I drove a bicycle I'm going I'm going I'm going whichever way Brent goes to win his play alright I'm gonna be honest because underdog is so easy to win so easy Brent just downloaded underdog recently I gotta be honest Tyso really helped me out with that and this is not an ad I mean it is for what with what it just I got it was so easy to sign up for and so easy for me to have a credit play responsibly play with funds that you have that you're able to lose and if you do you're okay with it download download the app today and use promo code Tyso to score $50 in bonus entries when you play your first $5 that's promo code Tyso underdog make picks win money alright you guys can get going now thank you I love you love you bye love you bye must be 18 plus 19 plus in Alabama NE 19 plus in CO for some games 21 plus in AZ MA and VA and present in a state where underdog fantasy operates terms apply concern with your play call 1-800-MY-RESET or 1-800-GAMBLER or visit www.ncpgambling.org AZ 1-800-NEXT-STEP 1-800-639-8783 or text NEXT-STEP to 53342 New York call 24-7 HOPE line at 1-877-8-HOPE-NY or text HOPE-NY 467-369 I can't believe it this episode is sponsored by BetterHelp you know I got off stage the other day the improv last night actually and somebody says you seem like you need therapy but it also seems like you're in therapy and I said I'll take that as a compliment and I understand all of this yeah what's going on why are you so sweaty oh because of you biking here yeah you're pretty sweaty do you want me to get you a towel or something nope you gonna keep it yeah would you agree that maybe you don't need a towel but it's fair to say that you do need therapy well one of the reasons I'm sweating is because I didn't take my antidepressants today I just took it so I'm sweating you didn't take it or you did you're saying you didn't take it this morning no and you took it just now yeah did you forget yeah how you feeling sweaty what I love about therapy is it offers you questions I say this all the time but answers are relatively easy Brent what's 4 plus 4 8 8 great that was you know easier for some than others but you would never have gotten to 8 if you didn't know to ask the question first and what I love about therapy is sometimes I have maybe I have answers but I don't understand the question like Jeopardy what is making me feel this way or I guess like friends the way I said it there right I am sweating so much because I didn't go to better help I love therapy what's great about better help is it matches you up with a clinical therapist and if you don't like that therapist you could be rematched with another one until you find somebody you like at no cost to you or me rematched with over 30,000 therapists better help is the world's largest online therapy platform when life feels when life feels overwhelming therapy can help sign up and get 10% off at betterhelp.com slash tyso that's better help h-e-l-p dot com slash t-y-s-o from the creator of John Wick and Nobody comes a new movie called Normal you know what's cool about this it's a double barreled shotgun blast of pure mayhem not with John Wick no but it's from the creators of that you see for Sheriff Ulysses played by Bob Odenkirk a new job as a temporary sheriff in a quaint town of normal Minnesota was meant to be a welcome respite from the recent troubles but when a botched bank robbery interrupts the peace a dark secret is exposed and Ulysses discovered that the town is anything but its namesake but that can't have Henry Winkler not yet suddenly everybody is trying to shoot the sheriff and he has to rely on his wits and some crooks if he is to survive the night and that's all before the Yuzuka show up with Henry Winkler and Lena Hedley Hedy and Bob Odenkirk guess when you could see it and where you could see it April 17th only in theaters what I didn't like that yeah you are professional I didn't like that ugh I didn't like that well if you need a new shirt you can just go to my website and use promo code boobs for 10% off boobs B-O-O-B-S but why why that name something better than boobs um universal healthcare it's too long for a promo code that could be a promo code uh J-K-S for jokes for J.K. Simmons yeah boobs um yeah I guess boobs are pretty great yeah boobs used to be much more important in the 90s and early 2000s I don't think it was then I think it was who we were in the 90s you know that's it well i i mean i was wasn't even born for half of it i got an audible approval from over there just now with that one right i i i would argue that that teenagers in the 90s cared about boobs more than teenagers today okay i would like to see this debate that'd be fun debate you know what i mean like you debating someone who is a modern day teenager and they're saying that they they still do care about it more they care about boobs they're boobs yeah i'm not saying i don't care about boobs i'm just saying it used to be you like boobs and i think a lot of it now there's i think butts and personalities are more important now personalities yes in that order it goes butts personalities boobs it used to be boobs butts personalities i think it was always personalities that's great and and i appreciate you being a social justice warrior but i'm not talking about sgw that is not sgw teenagers don't put personalities on their wall teenagers don't buy posters of of of tina fey and put them on their wall teenagers had jenny mccarthy and carmen electra on their wall in the 90s you got me singing does not put food on the table your father died singing his shoulda coulda wouldas what is that sister act two back in the habit oh my god i had that cd i had that um i had both soundtracks on cd i listened to them a lot when i was redecorating my room from what to what you were getting rid of all the all the posters of of tina fey and amy poehler i don't think tina fey had posters back then i think tina fey was because girls girls with that wasn't what posters are that's not what teenagers no i mean when i was doing that there wasn't a poster of tina fey anywhere in the world she wasn't a poster person back then when i was i was three years old when i came out when did 30 rock come out i don't know 2006 or seven you know what sucks no it came out that late i believe because it ran till 2013 it definitely did really dates man i was born in 96 you were not born in 96 yes i was 30 rock come out i would say 2004 here's what i found in 5006 did you just look it up no i just guessed do you remember 9-11 uh i mean i remember my parents talking about it a lot i was five what year did 30 rock come out this is uh 2006 wow i rewatch it i rewatch that's that's one of my go-tos really yeah 2006 i just moved to la i think that point really yeah why'd you move here to get on fallout um uh i guess you could i guess you could say yeah uh you know in in the grand scheme of things looking back how about this wetness huh do you want a different shirt no because then i would be a different shirt like this is i do have a different shirt in my car it could be funny if you put if we put this all on hold for a little bit and you got your shirt i'm gonna do it are you really are you uncomfortable no i just think it looks dumb it looks like it's fine like it looks like i'm like sweating in a weird way you know like a weird type of sweat like yeah man i don't know um yeah there's a guy uh huh who no i don't i don't know i don't know who that is actually i'm more just i was friends with them but um if you guys want to check out you're talking about our sting list yeah uh no i i never saw him i mean i saw him but i didn't talk to him i was far away i was just a caterer i was just a caterer there he he i bonded my cigarette and he gave me a hundred bucks and i was like oh okay what do you need man that's that's all it was i was just like yeah i mean i believe you i don't have his phone i don't have his phone number i didn't have my phone we're not allowed to have phones on the floor so just yeah that's fine yeah cool um you know it's making me think because uh and back to the future that you you said that you don't like to be on the floor you don't like to be on the floor you don't like to be on the floor called a chicken like marty mcfly but also said that uh yes well that's that's then you you put your phone down because you're like well because i went well because i think that's like a dumb intimidation tactic project however you want but it affected you now affected what you change your mind like i'm not going to do it now because you're goading me into doing something oh we could make you could call me a goat but i can't call you a chicken goad i think it's go like a geode you know a geode like job no yeah that's what geode comes from you crack job his head was filled with rocks he was so dumb that's what geode you know geode joe joe joe job job job job that's like translation from irish have you seen that guy that talks about the old language are you kidding me that's where that's from right of course yeah it's like you know comes from the name rosala rosala rosa rosa rise rocks rocks rocks rocks rocks rocks rocks rocks wrecks wrecks wreck wreck wreck boom dunk that was great dude wish and the letters are even like letters that like he could have yeah you know he could have done it like he could have done it like it's like it's like a letter it's like a handprint or something that doesn't even exist at all it never existed because it couldn't even rise but we don't know how to write oh i got eye boogers i didn't shower this morning really yeah i just i showered i um sometimes i i try to if i i want to be able to shower at least an hour before the podcast because my that just my hair is wet and whatever um i took my dog for a walk and i wanted to take him for a longer walk and i'm like i just i'm not gonna go in how long is a long walk uh every morning uh there's a halo hanging on the corner of my girlfriend's four post bed but i would say i'd like to at least the first walk do a half hour it's like a regular walk 25 30 minutes that's good that's good and then a longer a longer walk would be more than a half hour yeah that's a good amount walk to the coffee shop every morning there's a halo hanging on the corner of my girlfriend's four is that a really i think so i think that's like back in the day when they were singing about their uh about women not being promiscuous but i think that i think that we need to live our life and if a woman is interested in exploring her body as long as she feels safe and is safe with all people but we're just speaking about women then like let her get fucked and sucked let her get fucked and dunked sucked and banged and ripped and roared oh just deal hugely said that right double dipped i think it was actually um eddie griffin eddie griffin do you remember did you ever see the kings of comedy oh my god i think i did there's different kings of comedy i don't remember which is which but i'm talking about the one with cedric cedric d.l hugli so of course of course so i just said of course no one's ever said that of course so and steve harvey bernie mack cedric the entertainer dj d.l hugli i don't know d.l was part of the kings of comedy yeah wasn't he he was the fourth that was you there's four of them cedric bernie steve yeah and d.l hugli okay um uh am i 100 sure i almost never am but i would put money on it why are you asking though uh because we were just talking about d.l hugli oh right i was yeah um d.l hugli uh i remember my introduction to him was it those four guys my introduction to d.l hugli uh i don't know if it was my introduction to him but i know that the thing i've seen of d.l hugli the the thing that he filmed the earliest i think was he and will smith were friends in fresh prince and d.l hugli played a character who also who did stand-up and will in the show is a funny guy he's a class clown he's a goofy guy people laugh at him you've never heard of the fresh prince of bel-air oh you didn't say that though did you say that i i don't know you said it i thought i did i just didn't hear that i don't know why um yeah and uh he will's like i could do that because will's a funny guy you know like yeah like i could do that and then will goes up and he does stand-up and i think this is the same episode he he bombs he bombs there was a uh uh if i'm not mistaken i think this is the episode because i get no i don't know why you would do stand-up twice but maybe this is a different i'm not he bombs and it was funny i can't remember but there's another stand-up thing that he did that i'm remembering where will took pictures of stuff and he sold him the paparazzi and he took pictures of jay leno pouring oil down a drain or something but the pictures weren't wasn't oil it was he was just pouring his coffee down the drain and will there's a lawsuit and he wanted to get in touch with jay leno to apologize or whatever so he goes to a taping of the leno show and while he's in the green room they either ask him to leave or the stand-up comedian that's going on gets sick whatever it is it was this it was that game where he now has to pretend he's this you know like and he pretends that he is a stand-up comic fuck i don't something with advil the stand-up comic tells him a joke about advil and it's a now he takes the place of him and now ladies and gentlemen blah blah blah blah and will smith goes out as the comedian and he doesn't know what to do and he just says something like oh i think the joke was black people don't want to use advil because they have to pick cotton out of the advil container something like that i don't remember what it was but will then goes up and he does it wrong and he goes he goes he goes out there and he goes and he's really nervous and he goes i don't like advil because i'm black or something like that he just people are like he just butchered it dude bombing on not bombing not necessarily in stand-up comedy just like speaking to a you know like a class or a presentation or something when actors bomb and they don't they don't overdo it they don't go but like they really you really believe the discomfort which is an easy thing to tap into because you just just don't be just don't be comfortable you know the worst discomfort that exists you think the first couple times i bombed socially i mean not like we're not talking about physical pain i just mean like where you're in the twilight zone you're kind of like that thing where you know sometimes for bombing they make everything super loud you hear like you're there's like a ringing like yeah like everything is when there's an explosion yeah like that that's the bomb feels like everything feels i have a clip of that actually um uh can i get a suggestion shut up shut up shut up shut up there's so many suggestions uh i can't even understand most of them that's it my name is rick glassman clip plugged you were you were driving like this wait will you continue what you were saying though i'm so sorry oh i i don't think i was continue i don't have wasn't saying anything i was just some i was just talking about bombing i think this shirt's bombing actually starting to dry a bit isn't it you were saying that it was such a it was the worst feeling for you is that discomfort of yeah the discomfort of bombing is hideous it's like that thing where you know it's kind of otherworldly it's like a special type of bomb a special type of feeling that's you don't know it until you experience it do you consider bombing to be based off of the audience reaction or lack of reaction or do you consider it being the discomfort of the bombing or the discomfort that you feel because of their reaction or lack of reaction uh definitely personal it's always personal because i've had times when i definitely empirically bombed but i felt great so i was like oh i liked they they sucked because i was doing something i thought was funny and stuff like that you know what i mean yeah but not like i didn't feel like so it's it's not the bombing that's difficult it's the it's the reaction to it it's the it's the trigger to it yeah it's how you react because you know sometimes how you have like you react poorly to something and you're not someone who's going to react to it and you're not someone who's going to react to it like when i called you a chicken like you think that that was a weird thing for you to do right that was your reaction to it i was just being playful and you're like well i'm not gonna you can't do that i'm not gonna remember i know i kind of forgot that it wasn't you know i know if you're gonna be like that i'm not gonna call them i'm not gonna be threatened threatened by you with the chicken sound for no not now pencils down it's drying yeah so you have a movie coming out that yeah you invited me to a premiere of and jk simmons but i'm not gonna be in town and we'll see what's that you're going on spring break no i'm gonna be in houston doing a comedy this weekend actually i'll be in houston texas doing stand-up yeah this is a tuesday though yeah but this will yes so this weekend so this friday when this comes out this friday i'll be doing shows in houston don't you come home after the weekend yeah also wait i take it back because this episode is not gonna be that week i was just in houston what is your thing maybe i can go the 24th what you do is when you when you get something you look at it that's the key oh i mean exactly it's crazy how many people you have to harangue about something see this says march 24th on it yeah that is tuesday oh isn't it tuesday yeah yeah you're right you know what because april 24th i'll be out of town that must have been what i was thinking i don't know but yeah i think i'd like to go to this i gotta tell you though mermaid i'm bad at dates man i'm fucking bad uh mermaid what's this movie it's a movie i did in florida about two years ago uh two years ago yeah you know everything takes forever you have make to make the movie you gotta submit it to the festivals and it shows at the festival and then that's you know everything takes a long time yeah i mean two years is nothing there's movies that have taken like a lot longer than that sorry i brought it up man i don't know i guess i get sensitive to it because i feel like i wish it took didn't take so long that's not that long two years it's not that long yeah two and a half i think actually so i'm trying to think when it was either way it's coming out finally i play a guy who was um addicted to drugs and he's obsessed with fish and he finds the band or the creature the creature creature yeah i'm i don't think there's a lot of people who love the band also love drugs so it's kind of a metaphor they do but no one's gonna no one's gonna think that i don't think okay yeah if they did that that's not a problem i don't think that would be fine and then whatever yeah it wouldn't matter whatever gets whatever puts butts in the seats whatever gets butts in the seats it ever gets people in the stands so you are a a drug addict who loves fish who loves loves fish he's a loser guy and he finds a mermaid you can probably play that pretty well yeah shake your bottle shake your fucking bottle hey rick shake your bottle hey ricky shake your bottle you know that actor's name who says that i don't even know what you're saying remember that part of goodfellas when someone says that to joe pesci that one actor she says hey rick hey nicky go go get your fucking shine box and they kill him right yeah joe pesci man my introduction to joe pesci was my cousin vinnie i didn't know his back catalog because i saw yeah i saw that first that movie's great it takes place in the south florida's also a southern state to some extent this movie takes place on the gulf coast of florida in saint petersburg which is like a beach town i've been to saint petersburg to do great town super fun and the movie's about a guy who um finds a mermaid and then uh he loses it because of uh evil forces and it's a it's a thriller it's a comedy it's kind of a horror it's got a bit of horror elements loses it how did he have it to be lost because he found it but did he hold it like did he bring it and put it in a jar he put it in his bathtub really yeah it's a creature it's a creature it's not a pretty it's isn't splash so but is it half is it human with the from the waist up it's like a mermaid right so yeah does it speak english or does it not could it not sing because of ursula um it can't speak english no what does it speak it doesn't speak that's great it's more believable yeah it's like a creature it's not like a is it scary looking yeah it's scary looking it's nasty looking teeth oh yeah sharp yep really cool do you have a picture uh i do but i mean you can see it and it's in the trailer uh should we play that clip can we play the clip we i don't know well will youtube allow it let's try okay did you know that the ocean is 71 of the earth's surface it is said that humans have only discovered around five percent of it which leaves lots of room for imaginations to run free doug daddy don't go doug doug why why can't you just stay because daddy's gotta go save a mermaid and we're and we're back yeah scary right scary fun thriller cool yeah sexy beach vibe how about those teeth yeah how about those teeth are you happy with the movie i love it i think it's an outstanding movie i'm really proud of it do you think it'll help you get uh even more in fallout 3 um i don't know i think those are probably independent of each other but um nothing's independent of another like an avatar all the trees are connected i'm just not quantifying things things i'm not in a quantify quantification mode these days i'm trying to de-quantify i really am because i think if i i can get trapped in quantification and then it's like you know i wasn't being sincere when i asked do you think this movie will i know but sometimes i um i don't have a and also equally insincere response so i'm just saying that so i'm taking are you trying but it does seem like you're being sincere whether not quantifying things because earlier i brought up when i was being sincere that i noticed that you had a lot in season two it looked like you had more to do you're like i don't really think of it that way i'm just really happy to be a part of it like you know like how nba players are coached to answer stuff at the end of like a game it did seem like you were doing that like i was coached i don't think you were coached because it was so transparent that's your little that's what you do when you get called out you're embarrassed i guess so i don't know i don't know how to talk about stuff honestly i feel like i don't know how to talk about certain things because i don't know how to um do you know how to feel about them don't know how to feel about it don't know how to have a perspective on it because if i'm close to it or you know it's like a thing where i don't want to think about it in that way so i don't know how to respond to it when it's talked about in a certain sense well uh not that this you need advice on this or that it even matters but i don't know how to talk about it in that way because i don't know but i do think uh a nice tool is to recognize the difference between thoughts and feelings and they're not mutually exclusive but i don't know what to think about something i don't know what it means you don't know how to quantify something i think that's what you said right i suppose i also just think that like uh the quantification sometimes reminds me of like counting something as though that is the soul of the importance of the thing but thoughts exist and feelings can exist separately so if you don't know what to think about something you could still try to tap into how does it make you feel and it could be it doesn't have to be like it makes me feel happy i mean that's simple but it could be something it makes me feel like like a bitch when i first moved here and i got my first job i was so excited i didn't know what was going to come from it but it reminded me of that like just being able to tap into a sense of emotion should we do some edm edmr right now is that how you do it how you do edmr as well isn't that like a thing it's like a thing where like i don't care that there's people quantifying the episodes i think edmr is is uh it's there's like vibrates and lights it's it's similar to this it's like a sensation but it's not you doing it i think you can i think the poor man's edmr is like you know it's like she's there yes okay i'm with my therapist we're doing the yeah yeah you ever do this i think i've been to this and i saw someone steal it for me once super long tube dick oh you're you're not asking if i actually masturbate like that you're asking if i mime masturbating like a massive tube like a like a gerbil you know the tunnels the gerbils used to go into they don't do that anymore right well they chew out of them i had a hamster that would chew out of it but they used to have gerbil tunnels was a big thing right like when i was growing up gerbil tunnels you had if you had gerbils you had to have the tunnels dude i saw one for a corgi you know i'm not kidding oh my god can you clip that for me to have a corgi tunnel oh are they pissing in it are they pissing in it like crazy because that's the thing the gerbils just piss that better be made of something they can get that is that real that's that's ai right i don't know man but it does scare me a little too but doesn't it scare you now you just we can't we don't know like that's yeah i wasn't talking about it scary me that i don't know if it's ai i'm saying it scares me to see that corgi going through that tube but what if it gets stuck oh i would be there in a second to get that corgi yeah corgis corgis are the cutest dogs they're just like they are you know i think they just obviously where's your boy i think he's in his bed alvin i need emotional support here come here alvin i think he's scared of you from your character from fallout come here buddy alvino hi buddy you're telling me that that isn't the cutest dog you've ever seen well this is the cutest dog i'm saying the cutest breed is corgi i think it really is in terms of like just like off the as soon as you see a corgi i'm just in man this is a good one though this is a really great one this is a blend right okay this is winning right now because of that sound that's like you know the feeling i have of this doggy and how like i walk him a lot and when people walk by a lot of times i see them they at least look at him and smile and i think to myself what a wonderful wild how like wonderful yeah he's pretty he just makes people happy and i get to live with him he's got the thing he's got the perfect the perfect size he's got the thing where you don't feel threatened by him for one so he's instantly you know he's got the perfect size he's got the thing where you don't feel you can approach and he's got the you have something similar well that's nice that's a nice compliment i like that i had a guy the other day i went to pick up my car it was being a light went on the car i took it in i could have just turned the light off myself but i took it in how could you turn the light off was it like the light you just google how to turn off an error code on a car but but do you want to turn it off or do you want to fix the error that's like taking it's like putting a band-aid over like you want a band-aid because all error codes are bullshit they're almost the same thing you want to fix the error that's like taking it's like almost all bullshit huh especially because it's a new car it's fucking bullshit interesting that you feel that way i would be curious what's going on but i don't give a shit i hope the car i don't care about the now correct me if i'm wrong you took an uber here because your car was broken yes no i drove here okay man oh uh i i okay i went into the to the to the place you know you check in with the guys the mechanic dudes who check you in with your stuff mechanic people yeah mechanic people marissa tomei her father was a mechanic yeah well this is her father's father's mechanic her three brothers were mechanics that wasn't in glendale okay i go in there and i'm immediately ignored by all these dudes alvin just left that's interesting petting him so i was using two hands to to just just trickery that's just trickering a guy comes in and he um he puts his arm on my shoulder like just puts his arm on his shoulder you know well i can't you can't do that right i don't want to cross the mic because i might hit it i just thought you were doing emdr again for a second why did he touch me officer officer why did he touch me um cops are therapists now too he touched put an arm on my shoulder it's like how can i help you buddy yeah because you're not threatening yeah but also it's that double thing where i'm first i'm like don't fucking touch me yeah but you didn't say it i didn't say it but i wasn't a i wasn't a really bad mood i wasn't like the one of the worst ones i've been in a very long time and i kept thinking like what if i had the ability to do like a thing where you do that around their hand grab it and i'm like i'm not gonna do that i'm not gonna do that and punch him in the fucking neck you could have done that yeah that would have been nuts because he did lay a hand on me but he was also it was me being like a defensive insane asshole prick thinking that this man is being patronizing and talking down to me when it's just being buddy but i do i get buddied all the time i got buddied at a coffee shop in texas once i think it was four times in the span of two minutes like why do you keep calling me buddy have you seen jamie foxx do an impression of denzel washington when somebody touches him and he goes get your hands off me we always talk about there were certain things that you would say in movies that became like your your calling card you get your fucking hands off me get your fucking hand that's right say it with me no i'll grab your hand and you play me hey you get your fucking hands off me you know what i'm talking about that sounds about right yeah yeah i feel that way sometimes if somebody ever but grabs you here what you do is you could you you grab them here and you go like this and then you go take it like that and then you go and then you punch now a lot of people they go around like a hook the quickest punch is from a to b dude go like this but stop right at the nose and then go honk like jackie chan did or not jackie chan have you done this racist um that's what mr miyagi does in the beginning oh right of karate kid 2 have you ever punched somebody yeah no way oh yeah tell me about it i mean i've been i've been in uh a you know a few fistfights what was the most recent one i haven't been in a recent one i mean how long i i mean 10 years college okay so you're afraid of this probably like eight years how did you start uh the most recent one i don't know if this is the most recent one but the one that's coming to mind it was all in the same area they were uh we were on a basketball court okay and there was a guy i'm just remembering the memory of it right the guy was being an asshole to a friend of mine and he was like this kind of stuff like you're not like pushing him but like grabbing the stuff and holding him and when you go up like pulling his shirt down just bullshit stuff not trash talk probably that too i'm just remembering the physics i just remember I would get very like, I'm like, let me guard him. you know like that kind of stuff like i want so then it gets a little handsy and we're doing some pushing and stuff and uh i don't remember what happened uh pardon me for making myself sound fucking awesome that's not what i'm intending to do but i think i dunked on him it was something where it was very physical and he fell down when i and then i i said something to him i don't remember i looked over him i said something or whatever and then he got up and he squared up like this there hasn't been many fights i've been in where it's like squared like he's letting me know it's it's almost like it's kind of respectful he's letting you know it's on yeah it's on yeah um and uh i remember a friend of mine uh shout out mike who actually just texted me um and he goes he said something like he went he said get him or something i remember when he when the guy went like i do remember thinking to myself oh i don't want to do this like i don't want to like yeah in my mind talking shit and being aggressive wasn't getting punched in the face i remember feeling that way but he did that and then he goes get him or something and then i remember when he said that i was just like oh yeah like it gave me what i needed that was what i needed in the corner yeah and then we just did then then uh uh he threw a punch this is not something that i i i remember happening much in fights but i do remember i felt cool because he threw a punch and i went like this and then i punched him back in the face where uh with my fist like where in the face like his nose his cheek his jaw just front in the face right just like that right there um and then like this uh it was just a punch like this and it didn't like knock him out or knock him down or anything and then he punched again and i remember i went like this and then i punched him in the stomach and then i'll be honest with you two of my friends that were like breaking it up grabbed him back and they held him and while they were holding him i was already about to punch him and i didn't know but i punched him again in the face and then i punched him again in the face while they were holding him dude i know i know that so i punched him three times this is assault um and uh then then i stopped because he was being held also i'm missing something because he punched me in the face too okay he got one in yeah he punched me in the face too and damn rick and then the the people came down to like kick everybody out and uh he was like and i think i was understood because inside outside inside because he was held and i punched wasn't right it wasn't right i didn't also know we were you know and then and i punched him and then i saw that because i was going to go in and he was like this i'm like oh i stopped and then he was like fuck this guy and they and and i remember i remember thinking to myself like be calm it'll make him mad and it did yeah and he got kicked out and i didn't get kicked out wow because of how he was yelling and stuff damn but yeah i did punch a guy while he was being held but he punched me he went to punch me first he call you buddy i don't think so nobody would call me buddy they know you've never been called buddy probably i don't think buddy is i think sometimes i'll say like buddy come on yeah but i think buddy is patronizing don't you think it is i think it can be i think it depends on its use i understand i think the use is but i don't know i don't think this guy was patronizing to you though he wasn't he wasn't this guy was not being patronizing this guy was actually being very genuine and super nice but i was in such a bad headspace that i was being defensive but it made me recall other times when i've heard buddy and i'm just like oh man there's something about it that is like yeah i understand that i'm also now just remembering buddy i'd rather be called fucker i'd rather be called fucker or like jack or like you know jack is jack isn't a bad jack is what like cool black guys say exactly saying that fucker's meanest then buddy then jack's cool fucker's not fucker can be cool fucker i mean i say what's up fucker yeah if you're mexican if a mexican guy's saying it but i'm what's up fucker i'm cool i can't do it but i'm cool i'm down motherfucker you know what rick motherfuckers know i'm down that is actually pretty cool motherfuckers know i'm down put your sunglasses on when you say that motherfuckers know i'm down yeah that's cool when motherfucker sees me on the street they know i'm down that's cool okay that's what i get when i'm out there in these streets these motherfuckers know i'm down all right they know what they know about me because i don't play do your glasses fall off or do you do that so if you want to take them off you don't have to put them in your pocket i have a thing where i'd like to take them off a lot right i actually picked this up in florida because you go on and outside so much you know and i have a thing with like wearing sunglasses indoors or when i'm talking to people i think it's kind of inherently rude i also don't know how people i can't fucking see i want to see a lot and so a lot of times i'll be outside and you take them off i have some nice sunglasses that i've thrown to the ground because i'm so used to having the the croakies on i'm like oh what's up fucker oh shit they're gone you know or like this you know what's up fucker oh yeah yeah my sunglasses are prescription so a lot of times if i'm wearing sunglasses because i think i'm taking a walk i'm gonna be outside if i go inside somewhere prescription regular glasses yeah i'll leave the sunglasses on so i could see and even then i feel like i like i went and i tried on some clothes and i said to the person hey these are prescription sunglasses i almost wanted them to know why i'm keeping them on the attitude goes a long way if you were just have a nice attitude you can wear sunglasses inside have you ever worn sunglasses inside while chewing gum does that make you feel more confident i have done it yeah i don't think about i never thought about that way i love chewing gum though i love cinnamon gum oof you should try fiber by momentous that felt like a real is that an actual thing yeah do you want me to give you a glass of fiber no i don't do i don't do any of that stuff i just do oats oats have saved my life i swear to god oats have been oats or a fucking doctor if you eat oats you don't need to go to the doctor i'm not kidding oats have changed my life when he gets up when he gets a notification on his car that his car is broken you go now it's a fucking racket that is a racket yeah i'm saying somebody who doesn't believe signs of something might be wrong to at least consider what might be wrong makes me feel that somebody who says just eat oats and you'll have to go to the doctor's like i don't know if this is a guy i trust for noticing when things need fixing i'm telling you i'm the guy you trust for real if you want to know the real shit you take off your glasses and throwing them on the ground by accident exactly because you know all this shit's everything i don't even talk about it i'm gonna get heated because everything's a scam everything's a fucking scam now i'm definitely not gonna talk about it you know about brouhaha face i don't know brouhaha this is brouhaha face what does brouhaha mean brouhaha is a a witch a male witch brouhaha i thought that was a i thought that was a warlock well sure but this is spanish it's a different language so oh warlock yeah i guess it's a warlock in spanish a brouhaha like this is my brouhaha face i sometimes feel like what's going on in the world or i don't know what's going on in the world i don't know what's going on right now is like a male witch do you ever see pictures of yourself and you're like i can tell i'm pissed off but the picture doesn't you know if you knew if you know the person you know that they're being pissed but if you know if you don't know you just think they're just being like serious like this like this like this you don't you look coy there i'm not feeling coy have you ever stared at someone to piss them off you would try to stare someone down like a stranger why don't you just tell me your example because i'm not sure if i could relate to it yet oh sometimes i'll do that just yeah you do that sometimes people will say stuff hey you ever eat taco bell and you feel like oh i didn't give me a stomachache i want to eat it more it's like i don't know just tell me that that's what happened to you it's not something that happens to me it's something that sometimes you ever do something and you wonder if other people do it so you ask them if they do it i would like for you to first tell me what you do and then ask if i've done it but i feel like that's that's like the thing where it reminds me one time in seventh grade a kid said on hey johnny what's your favorite toy and i go i don't know he goes mine's my go-kart he asked me that's what i'm saying that's what i'm saying so just say the thing i'm not i don't want to ask you so i can tell you then how come you didn't just say have you ever been in seventh grade and somebody said what's your favorite toy and then you say i don't know and they say mine's a go-kart how come you didn't word it that way then because you told me about your experience because you felt comfortable sharing your experience without feeling the need to ask if somebody else has shared it out defining what that experience is yet i think we're in the weeds now i think you need to give yourself some grace give yourself some space you're allowed to have space take the space okay i'm taking the space i think what i mean is that um i'm looking to uh connect with you and i want to know if it would make more sense if you had a reaction to that question to lead into the story because it's not really a story it's not it's not an experience so much like a thing like that's what the kid did do what's your favorite toy you would have told him your favorite toy and then he could then lead in with his it's just get to it tell me yours so i did the thing i was saying i don't like that's what i'm saying yeah and yeah i guess i did the thing i don't like but i wasn't doing it so i could tell you that villains don't know they're the bad guy um yes i'm the i saw that movie too what movie The one equalizer three is that in equalizer three hell yeah it is you didn't see it i've seen it numerous times i'm remembering but i've you didn't see numerous you saw equalizer three numerous times i i've seen it at least three times no you haven't i may i tell you the movie yeah okay check this out how does it open that doesn't tell me you've seen it because i don't remember how it opens okay so i'll tell you this i do know oh i know how it opens i know it opens we see i don't remember we see um this violent oh i know how it opens i know how it opens a man and his son are driving a car and they pull up to some place and it's this big compound beautiful mansion home thing and they walk in and and and he has the kid wait outside i remember now okay i remember now yes okay you have seen it you've seen it can't keep going why have you seen it multiple times i i love the franchise i really do i love it too so much can i tell you more is it stupid because i feel i want to see how far i feel like i could really do this okay um how what am i doing right now i wish i had a piece of paper maybe i do have a piece i do have a piece of paper you're gonna like this men's warehouse uh you're gonna like the way you look i guarantee it what's that from equalizer this what you just said it's george zimmer men's warehouse okay yeah i know i know what you're doing that's what he does with his napkin and when he brings his he brings his own tea in it sometimes i fucking love that shit so much i think denzel is the king of business could you imagine like woody harrelson um what's the guy talking dang ring-a-ling-a-dang-dong uh dallas buyers club what's matthew mcconaughey matthew mcconaughey denzel woody harrelson they're having a business off they're trying to like all right wouldn't that be that would be i'd pay i'd pay money to watch that well that's going to the theater what are you talking about i don't know i don't know about now huh so what um so i like doing business too i love eating i love holding stuff i like oh my god i can tell you do too yeah a little a little yeah so you were uh with uh you were with melinda steven jackson on march the 14th because i was you you breathe on the end not the lens i just been trying to figure out how you knew that she was that she was um the guy who goes to the five that's too much yeah he goes to the five five tastes he's like it's like okay rough um no so you you definitely used to live uh you lived with her for five five five months there um you're just doing it again they're like cut uh hi johnny um that's really i love what you're doing there uh it's just um i don't know maybe uh i think that if you could direct more of what you're doing to rick when you're speaking i'm talking to you as me i get it let me see you let me see how you do taking that note okay okay oh okay so less like um i'm saying do the performance now okay the performance now okay well you actually do it less okay so you're saying that um do you want to smell smell it no okay is that am i am i uh what size will be cowboy okay i got it so i'm gonna keep it above my waist great awesome dp um so march 14th you and melinda were out for a couple of hours wasn't that i don't know i your car wasn't there okay you like that no good yeah that was really good yeah i'll probably use the first one you really yeah the first one was the first was always the best you know what they say right one two or 13 i didn't know they say that but i know what that means it was one two or 26 that's where they say clint only does one dude yeah you know the story about him and uh um dances with wolves the actor from dance with kevin costner did clint eastwood direct no i was just calling kevin costner dances with wolves oh got it because that's how i think now you know equalizer equalizer three you know the story about him and kevin costner no i think this is true um it sounds true so i don't know what movie it was but clint was directing kevin costner in a film and this was kind of kevin costner's fame this is like robin hood i don't know what what movie was but uh there must be something he's directed on him if there hasn't then the story is not true so kevin costner's working with clint eastwood and they do the classic clint eastwood two takes and they're moving on and kevin costner's like whoa whoa whoa no no no we didn't we didn't get i didn't like that and clint's like yep we did we got it and kevin's like no no no i i don't want to move on i want to do it again and clint's like we're not we're moving on and kevin says no nobody talks to me like that and clint says i'm the guy who does and they move on well and kevin costner hasn't worked since he hasn't i mean saying like between that and then the next job he did yeah it was a perfect world there we go 93 man when did you like to be on that set brother to have seen that interaction between those two powerful beasts neither of them get called buddy huh oh god see i look like this but i feel like robert duvall yeah that's but tracks yeah but also i don't think i feel like robert duvall i think robert duvall felt different yeah it's interesting people probably a lot of people probably feel different than the way you see them yeah i think so wait a second you think that people feel differently than how they are viewed i think so yeah god man with the exception of probably denzel yeah sorry equalizer three imagine denzel got called buddy i don't think it would bother him i think what if robert duvall called denzel i don't think it would bother him i think what if robert duvall called denzel buddy okay i could call him let me call him i mean robert duvall is no he's not i was maybe going to be able to get him on my podcast and i don't have his number but i have his publicist number and this is cool you know what i'm gonna i told his publicist that they're together to call me really yeah i mean you call jk simmons yeah i got other ones what do you say like you're saying people that would be cool to call i'm trying to think because i didn't someone's like you forget you know i mean just like forget that you know a person because you know them from so long ago it's kind of like the novelty of it isn't really there but if you were to let's say i were to see him in public with someone an old friend or a new friend they'd be like who are you talking about if you just if i were to see someone like jk in public and we were to talk and we would talk friendly because i know him it would be like to other person to be you know that guy like yeah yeah that's a fun thing but i think we take that for granted i believe you i don't know i do i don't like to quantify things like that does that quantify i'm just doing your thing that's a qualify you're doing my thing what is my thing what is my thing rick what is what is like the thing that i do being very playful to distract from the unwillingness to have strong points of view all your strong points of view are about things that could be bits and not about things that are boundaries for yourself aren't bits just boundaries it's like it's not what a bit is it's like you you take a boundary i'm gonna take this boundary make it a boundary and i'm gonna take this boundary and i'm gonna take it into a bit you can you can use boundaries inspiration but real boundaries are not joking around about somebody not touching my shoulder real boundaries are saying hey i don't like being touched please stop i like being touched what happened to you when you brought your car in that's what i was saying is i was in a headspace where because i do that to other people i like being touched i actually do i like it i do not have a problem being touched a little bit honestly i think it's cool i like it because i do it to other people a lot and i think a lot of times people don't like it and i feel that's even better i like that will you give them some emdr i'm not accepting can i hold that mic yeah ready yeah we're trying out the new chipotle poppers these are some of the favorite new that's a new genre by the way is little handheld black mic yeah it's like this it is that isn't it asmr asthma asmr asmr amdr emds heads are falling off where is he alvin alvin watch this alvin my buddy come here does he ever call up your shorts like a weasel i put him under my shirt sometimes and he'll stay there do you ever drop them down your shorts tube like a slide for a corgi that would be fun you want to do that right now that'd be sick dude that would be sick oh my god what a cutie you're so cute from face on i'm gonna document this oh my god i got a phone call let's see here if i missed it he probably doesn't check his voicemails you know what i'm saying no it's not yeah well a lot of times his voicemails jk simmons voicemails don't notify him no it's a toll free call should we call him back no you got spam calls i i can't tell you if they're a lot because what compared to what but i get them yeah i get so many it's kind of insane do you answer them i used to but i stopped a while ago i it's my understanding that if you answer they will come yeah if you answer they're like oh there's a person yeah and so it just tells the whole system like hey we gotta go we got a live one here hey hey hey we got a live one line six this guy's ready to buy you know what it takes takes brass balls remember that part i think that's the worst part of that entire movie the brass balls part yeah what are you talking about uh glenn gary glenn ross oh alec baldwin takes those fucking brass balls out the older that movie gets the more just like what is this shit he's producing a prop from his briefcase oh it almost undoes his speech it's such a great speech you know that speech right do you think i should leave this open when you shake it no what do you think i should do always be closing is that a crowd cheering that was my brain just cheering i guess so it was just like a like a brilliant recognition of you subtly weaving that in like a dj it's like a dj who just played my favorite song that started before i even saw it coming that's funny all of a sudden it's like oh my god you're playing my song like oh how did he transition out of out of chubba womba into britain wood baby you got it oh my god how did he do it you just did it abc man that was slick rick you're gonna go by richard that's so cool to be a richard yeah so when i'm uh when i'm going in for uh like a job interview i introduce myself as richard what about the doctor big rick big rick yeah is this your general care or like a specific any kind of doctor i'd like to be a little playful because i'm not going to be playful in there and i'm gonna have a lot of questions and i want them to i want to open it up with a little bit it's actually the opposite of an audition when i go in for an audition i try to be very serious because i'm gonna be big so i want them to see that's not what i always am how do you feel about that with the doctor because that's something where doctor i go in silly because then i'm gonna i have a lot of questions do you ever um because i i struggle with that with the doctor the attitude how do i treat how do i you know do i be myself or do i i got a video i could show you right now that i i got an injection into my shoulder for something and listen to how playful the doctor is because of you videoed it yeah i would never video is that just the capsule you're trying to get through yeah i mean the capsule usually hurts as wow what happened like i don't think the muscles densely intervened sir you sir sir you forgot that no that's an extra 30 dollars now he's doing drugs back and upcharged like that loved it damn man did you injure your shoulder just from all the fighting i used to get into bro i gotta piss really bad do you want to do it yeah thank you let's do in the bathroom you saw my cousin vinny before home alone interesting um no but i don't think i necessarily recognized joe pesci no that's not true i probably saw maybe i maybe saw my cousin vinny before home alone wow but i also maybe not it sounds crazy i have to imagine i saw home alone first because it came out three years before but also uh also uh home alone was 95 no 1990 my cousin was 92 or regardless it came out earlier yeah i don't think i ever saw my cousin vinny before home alone but i don't think i ever saw my cousin uh but still joe pesci in home alone and this is me backtracking here yeah but my cousin vinny he's not a bad guy in it like yeah goodfellas and home alone he's a bad guy yeah my cousin vinny he's a hero he's so like my point was oh i didn't think of him as this bad guy before like this tough guy this scary guy and in home alone he was still scary yeah but yeah that's fair i probably saw home alone first i mean i wasn't born before either of them came out so it doesn't necessarily doesn't matter but yeah i wonder what i saw first i've probably seen them both around the same amount of times yeah maybe i've seen home alone more at least parts of home alone but like to put it on what's that the third act is so good the whole movie home is built for yeah act three it's like eight mile yeah yeah but also we're seeing the the end of eight mile is why it's worth watching over and over again totally but but the movie there's a lot going on before it where i think home alone truly they could have made it a short film i disagree okay you think take john williams out i think you'd agree you'd agree i mean well yeah that's a different conversation well we're talking music here i mean eight miles a very musical movie but i don't need any music in that movie up until lose yourself no but up until he's talking about how his best friends claire his best friends named cheddar bob who shot himself in the leg with his own gun yeah well and he did get jump got bucks katie rosten right all six of you chumps make a motherfucker and wayne did fuck my girl wink what is it isn't it wink i believe you but i'm still standing here screaming fuck the free world i'm still standing i'm still standing it's eight miles away that's really good that's good buddy i'm dying well we're gonna have to wrap it up in a little bit what's a little bit 15 yeah 10 12 you have to cover anything before we wrap i already covered the couch we talked about the movie mermaid that's gonna when is it when can people see it uh sneak previews are april 8th at almo draft house but there should be more theaters added after those sell out which they're almost sold out uh but it's on vod may 12th where like apple i think initially it's just everywhere for purchase but i think it might be streaming once they this is all i'm not sure i might even have a text about it right now but i don't know did you write it or were you cast in it i was did not write it no i'm the lead of the movie so you were cast in it yeah did you audition for it no what did they see you in that they like we want johnny pepperton uh tyler cornack who's the writer director he made a movie called butt boy it's i think it's an outstanding movie a wonderful movie super funny weird indie movie and i watched it during the pandemic and i loved it i messaged messaged him saying how much i liked it and we became friends and he wrote this part for me with you in mind that's great yeah so it's like a great i mean it's like i love the role it's a great role it's very interesting fun role so it looks beautiful it's a beautiful movie too it's very well shot um it's a real movie you know i'm excited to see it i can't wait for you to see it i'm excited for you to see it yeah i think may 24th it's a tuesday march 24th is a tuesday that's the when i could see that's the the you also said if i couldn't see you could send me a screener i will send it to you if you want but you know nothing beats a theater love a theater love a theater theaters are perilous times though it seems like it's not good what do you think about the industry i'm trying not to quantify that kind of stuff i just like to make art that's not quantifying i lost i did it for 45 seconds once what just breathing out you ever do that breathe out for 40 seconds or hold your breath oh let's try you used to do this honestly it's satchmo okay ready i have done this before so i'm gonna do it in the car with my mom and then my mom says stop you want to try it do it see how it can work breathe out the longest yeah i don't know if i have like i sometimes i do it when i feel like i have it and but Fuck, the laughing took a few seconds out. Fucking hell, I didn't smile. Even without the laugh. You got me. Oh, man, ruined it. I wonder if the spitting makes it easier than the noise. You try humming it. I'll try the spitting. Well, it's about restricting the airflow. I'm wondering if making the noise does more output than the spitting. I think this is the best. You did like 36 seconds. No, that takes too much. Because you're doing so much, man. You're getting such an output there. Yeah, there's too much output. It's about. The noise was easier for me. It really is playing the trumpet, honestly. Like, if you can do like this kind of thing, like a. I'm going to call JK. Hold on a second. Let me call somebody here. Let me call someone real quick here, see if this works. Please leave your message for me. Oh. We'd bleep it. Whatever. For a clip, could we do something where we talk about Ella coming on the podcast and I'll post it? And I'll tag her in it and I'll say, will you please come on the podcast? Sure. You could start it. Look to the camera. And if you could maybe make it MTV style, where we'll go like this and be like, what up, Ella? It's your boy, Johnny Pepperton. And this is my second time I'm going to take you shooting, you know, whatever it might be. Yeah, okay. And we think you'd be a great guest. Okay. And you know how to do the. Oh, yeah, like the zooming and the punching? Yeah, and we'll put some music in and some colors. Yo, spring break, what's up? Take your shoes off. Take your shoes off. Ella, what's up, my girl? It's your boy, J-double-P, here at MTV Party To Go. Spring break, Panama City. What's up? Shout out here. We're taking our shoes off with my main man, Rick Glassman. He's a fly guy. What's up, Ella? You got to get up in this zone here. Super cool. Super awesome. Look who doesn't have shoes on. It's me, no shoes on. Spring break. Yeah, shoes are off. Socks are out. Sun's out. Bun's out. Get in here, girl. Get in here, girl. Yeah. I think that was the best one. I'm Bubby. I'm Bubby Bononi. And this is spring break. We're going to be out here all week. So check us out online. Hit us up. Scan the QR code and get your shoes off, okay? What's up? Yeah. What's up? What does the QR code do? It takes you to an exclusive offer to get a plushie in the shape of a curling stone. That sounds sick. That's real, though. All right. Train's coming. Anything else you want to plug? Plug? No. Anything you want to be plugged? I mean, I've got some dates coming up, but they'll be on my website. We'll put them up here. You'll text them to me and we'll put them up right here on the screen. I'll text them to you. We'll put them up wherever they go. They go right here? Yep. So it would be like a thing where I'll be here? Yeah. Okay. I'll be there. Any in particular you want to have audio for? Wait, what do you mean? Do you want to mention any dates that, like. I can't remember what they are because they're not until July. I don't remember what they are. Summer dates. Summer dates. Yeah. All right. Yeah. Do you want me to ask you anything? Nah. Theme music. Let's do a board real quick. I could stay there. Do one more, then? I think I blinked again. All right. How do you not blink? That's what your body's supposed to do, isn't it?