This is a headgun podcast. This podcast is supported by Planned Parenthood Federation of America. I'm about to give you a very non-controversial fact. Everyone deserves health care that is safe, affordable, and non-judgmental. Truly that is not a hot take, but the Trump administration, Congress, and the courts have spent the past few years making health care more expensive and harder to get. Our community-based Planned Parenthood Health Centers, cancers, will go undetected, STI's will go untreated, and patients won't get the birth control or abortion care they need to plan their families and futures. And now some members of Congress want to extend the defunding of Planned Parenthood permanently, robbing care from people who rely on Medicaid to get services. But Planned Parenthood isn't backing down. They're still showing up for patients and making sure everyone can get the life-saving, life-changing care that they need. No matter the size, your donation makes a real difference, helping Planned Parenthood meet this moment and protect access to care when and where it matters the most. Don't wait. Pull out your phone, go to PlannedParenthood.org/Defend, and give today. Cheers. Welcome to the Anthem pod. I am Tignotaro sitting here with my co-host, and their names are. May Martin. And fortune beam, sir. Oh my gosh. Go to Hulu. Fortune just did a thumbs up. That's electric. Really? Oh, yes. It's electric. I did. I do. That was early days when I couldn't believe that the two of you didn't know the electric slide. Still don't know it. I don't know. What do you even do at weddings? Get married. What do you mean as a guest, if you know the electric slide, you didn't know the cupid shuffle or the wobble? I just jumped it up and down. Yeah, I just get out there and I do this. My style of dancing is kind of like a 12-year-old boy at a Blink-182 concert just jumping up and down like that. It was really. Oh, you should hang out with Max and Finn. Did they jump? Well, they can't wait to go to Blink-182 concerts. That'd be a great concert. A great fun part. I'm a fun wedding guest. I don't doubt it. Explain. Like, what do you do? I like weddings, especially if they've got really good food. So as long as they've got really good food, I'm in a good mood. So if I've been satiated in that way, and I'm like, it's dance floor time, and then I'm like on the dance floor, getting everybody going, and that is good. What happens if they have bad food? What does that look like? Sulking in a corner. I'll maybe do the wobble at one point. What is that? Wobble it and wobble it and wobble it and wobble it and wobble it. Yeah, yeah. That's it? I don't know what that is. No, I don't know the whole song, but there's like a dance. It's like a line dance, but it's called the wobble. My favorite? I'll do it together. Well, would you ever instigate a congeal line? Oh, yeah. You would? Yeah, you're necessary. I started a congeal line at my sister-in-law's wedding. I had her baby in the carriage, and I started a congeal line with the baby carriage, and then I got a whole situation, like that. Yeah, it was really fun. That's a funny one. My thing at a wedding is you'll find me like in the corner, trapped with, but like by choice, with like a strange uncle or second cousin who's telling me like some weird stuff from their life. Yeah. Oh, wow. Are you interested? Yeah. That's the thing I am. Yeah. Plus your heart. I like those sort of stragglers who are a little shy, and then all the young people are dancing and stuff, and they're kind of there, like, yeah, I like them. You know what that reminds me of? It's a song that makes me cry every time I hear it. In fact, I talk about how much the song makes me cry, and Stephanie and I. They're dancing with me. Oh my gosh. I just pictured for the first time in my life, cheek-to-cheek, like, asses together. Oh my god. Is that what that song's about? No. Well, we don't know. Okay. So we have a good idea though, Mae, that it's not about that. But we were in Colorado, as you know, over the summer, and we were walking past this tent at a festival. And this guy was alone on the stage singing with his acoustic guitar, the exact song that destroys me, and I stood there, and watched, I was like, Stephanie, this is the song, and I stood there just tears rolling down my cheeks. And it's, are you familiar with John Prine? Yes. Do you know John Prine's song "Hello" in there? No. I'm right in the down. Okay. It's going to kill me. But it's basically, it's kind of off of what you're saying, Mae, is like the lonesome uncle that nobody's talking to. This song is about not passing by elderly people in the world, and just stop and say hello in there. And it just gave me chills just saying it, the way he sings it, because he's John Prine, it just destroyed, thinking about elderly people getting passed up, and just all you have to do is say hello in there, and they have so much tearing up. There's so much in there, like, there's wealth of experience all the time, and stuff to say. Yeah. Yeah. And people just walk on by. But please, will you listen to that and text me after the show and tell me if it does anything to you? I think it will. But sometimes it's also just the tone of the melody as well, like, yeah, yeah, yeah. Anyway, I, God, I love John Prine, and man does that song destroy me. I cry a lot of wettings anyway. Oh. What was that? What was that? I just wanted attention. Yeah. Hello. Hello. Hello in there. Hello in there. Wait. So your wall is painted, yes, it's looking behind fortune in her new office. It's looking decorated, painted. There's a handsome, has this on your wall? Yeah, I do. I do. Yeah. There is. Uh, this is the framed, yep, picture of handsome Thomas just described what it is here. Oh, for our audio listeners, okay. So up, so I just had my office painted. So you're right, May, it's a new color, a little grayish, um, and I had some memorabilia framed. So in the corner over here, for those listening is, um, uh, when I did a show in, I believe that was Louisville or was it Lexington, one of the two, I think Lexington, uh, an artist drew this of Biggie, it's him in it with a little crown and it has that my show, um, tore on it. And I have our handsome pod, um, poster, um, that is the, uh, our post, uh, our little thumbnail on our podcast up here, I have a celebrity will of fortune. It's my name in the will of fortune thing. That's wicked. Why doesn't it say crashing my exorcist bike? Did I tell you guys, I'm going on it on my exorcist bike, I'm going to get on that bike. No, I need tips for it because I don't really, I didn't really grow up watching only directed towards fortune. Oh, have you been on it? Oh, yeah. Sorry. Of course. Famously. Famously. I'm really worried that it's going to be like, I watch that on repeat sometimes, I'll rewind it. I'm so scared that's going to have me that it's going to be like, you just have to go with it. It's fun. It's so fun. It's the board game. I didn't know I had the board game. And so I think that's a good sign. And, uh, but I am scared it's going to say, like, the early bird gets the worm and I'm going to be like, the early dick gets your mom or something. I'm nervous. Oh. What's not live? So, but it's not live. Okay. That they're not going to have, uh, it's a live audience, but it's not rude. Yeah. It's not taped to live, it's a live audience, but that the, the board that you spend is a lot harder to spend than you think. It's not really. Not with those guns. Thanks. These little things are all mace. No, I didn't do it, but I wish you could spend it with your games. I know, right? It is, but you, it does, you're like, oh, man. Uh, I'm sorry, it takes showing your guns and be careful when you're walking around that little platform back there because I did it with, uh, Bobby Burke, who I love. And he was walk, oh, nice, nice arms, nice to and guns, take his flexing. He, um, step down off of, uh, the thing and just like face planted it wiped out. It's hard to see back there, so just be careful. Oh, my God.
My friend of mine just slipped in the shower and hit his head on a sink and got 17 stitches like It's like we're we got to be careful up there guys. We got to be careful We have to not just out there, but in there in your shower. Yeah I am so careful when I am well as you know my mother died from a head injury Yes So when I am in hotel rooms. I do not just cat or any bathroom or I am not Casual about walking around. I take very careful steps. I think that's good. I do too I'm nervous because I got a barbecue guys a nice shiny Guy and I'm trying to wonder I want to be one of those Guys the flips of burger and I'm but I'm nervous. I've never had a propane tank like that around me And I'm nervous about that who be okay. Yeah, it's not it's not bad. No Once you get the hang of it. It's fine. Yeah, but before you get the hang of it. Yeah, it's not fine I've already lived with the burgers on fire just YouTube just YouTube it Yeah, well, I know to turn it oh turn it on and off Then you're set Yeah, yeah, yeah, okay Well the worrying thing was the I left it I thought I'd I'd wrapped up I cleaned the barbecue and then my friend Matt said oh buddy You want me to turn off the propane tank and I said I did it already and I gave him a hard time about it He went and checked it was not closed. You definitely need to close up. Yeah, yeah, but like fortune said it'll be fine Yeah, there's nothing to worry about, you know Just Lucy Goosey propane tank next to your house falling off a hill and Fires I only work normally the propane will just kind of leak in whatever But where you love people are starting fires. That's why I say make sure it starts. I gotta be careful Yeah, yeah, yeah, well, I just have this image of myself as like a barbecue or like But after we get off this, I'm gonna make dinner just for one person. Is that a time I might use the grill or is that a person? I'm a real girl tonight You used your girl. I'm going to after we tape. Yeah me too. Okay, so it's not weird to just make yourself a solo meal on a grill Not at all. All right, great. Also are we technically taping? Yeah, good question. Wait, did I say filming? No, you said tape after we tape every we tape We're recording. Yeah, that's more like it. And we're taping though. Are we? Are we? Can you see us? Is that what taping is if you can see the person? I still thought we were recording video videos taping audios recording Really? No, I don't know. I backed that. Yeah, listen. We're the group that brought you wheeled arrow Oh Stephanie makes fun of me anytime I pick up my phone and I say oh, I'm gonna tape this or whatever and she's like show me the tapes. Yeah So anyway, do you guys some collect points on your credit cards? Oh, yeah For sure big thumb. Why do you need some? I need to throw my points. Well, I only just got my first credit card. I've been oh Just I'm almost 40, but I've been just using debit And I know you've been missing out on so many points. Yeah, so I got it. Yeah, I gotta start I gotta start doing this point thing So you can use them to great advantage, but the trick to them is that you have to pay it off every month because it's a high Interest rate auto. I have it on auto. Yes, so make sure you always pay it down don't don't otherwise then you're just accumulating, you know credit a bad credit. Yeah, and at a very high interest rate, but they some of these credit cards do have like an expensive fee per year But they have a lot of benefits to them like one It feels like it, but it's not am okay. I have an am x is it the silver one? The travel one is it the silver one. Oh, it's it looks gold Okay, then it's probably the am x gold No, I don't know what that one does, but the one that I have is really amazing for traveling The silver one I fly so much I should be getting some some point. So I always hear people say I got the flight on points Well, listen, it's an expensive credit card. It's like a year. It's like I used to be like 500 now it's like 800 But you get like three hundred dollars in airline credit. You get two hundred dollars in uber credit And then and then our listeners have wandered away They want to know and then there are hotels where if you book it through Am x you can get new check in you can get daily breakfast for two a hundred dollar credit and check out at four. It's pretty awesome That's that's that's on top of just your regular points You accumulate that you can also use for things. Let's go to commercial. So what are you gonna cook on your real fortune? Um, I bought some little tiny filet mignon's at Trader Joe's. I'm gonna make one of those tiny and a sweet potato Oh, yeah Now is it a regular old sweet potato or is it a Japanese sweet potato which is one of the highest nutrient I do like I do like Japanese sweet potatoes, but this is a regular one. Okay Are you looking to increase your nutrient in yes? I started doing more Japanese ones Japanese is supposed to be uh the top top dog of real potatoes. Yes. The inside of that is Is that the purple one or the white one white? Okay. Uh, yes white. We got it. The inside's white. Okay. Yeah But the purple ones are good all purple foods are so nutrient dense really Yes, anything that is purple shove it in your face You think they would teach us that in school. That's such a simple purple foods are good This episode going from Amex points to nutrient dense foods. Oh, we tried We're giving people everything. We're like all out on the table Checking all state first could save you hundreds on car insurance. Not checking that my camera is already to go before getting a photo with a celebrity I admire. I'm panicking. I'm a huge fan of this person and now I'm fumbling with my phone as they edge away from me at an event Hey, come back here Yeah, check him first his handsome. So check all state first for an auto quote could save you hundreds You're in good hands with all state potential savings varies subject to terms conditions and availability all state North American insurance company and affiliates Northbrook Illinois, I value my sleep and that's why I'm so excited that blissy is sponsoring handsome You spend about a third of your life resting your face against your pillow So why not make sure that pillowcase is the best that it can be Blissy silk pillowcases are incredible. 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That's wildgrain.com/hansom for $30 off your first box and free croissants for life or use promo code handsome at checkout Alasso is showing tan guns. Can you tell I'm tan? You are super-tanned. Uh-huh. We've all been showing our handsome guns look at my tan line Oh my god Okay, take it as like a clear outline of an apple watch That's crazy fortune. I didn't just hike one time. I was off in the wilderness Basically daily also over the summer and wore like a total, you know floppy son out of my eyes hat and um, you know Protected myself as much as possible, but this still happened. Yeah But um, you know what we should make stencils that are like body stencils of the handsome pot or something and then people can Put them on when they're tanning and then they'll have a tan. Yeah, that's a really good idea on the list. It goes Mr. Thomas
- That is one more thing we'll never do. - That's a long-ass list. - We should release it as a book. - Yeah, we should. - Yeah, we should. - Put it on the list, Thomas. - Oh, and people can see it. - Someone was surprised that it was actually real. There is a real list, right? - There is, we've never seen it. - We've never seen it. - It's crazy. - It is real, yes, it's on my computer. - That one day it'll be a book and it'll be our suggestions for other people to do things that we'll never do. - And then keep the pages long. - People can send in videos of themselves doing, checking off all of this. - And we still never have to do it? - No, we do. Once somebody gives us a television show to, you know. - Oh yeah, we do need to have a TV show in order to give us that. - I like the idea that we never pitched for one. We never tried to ask, but we were just like, someone better give us one. - Someone just give us a TV show and won't let us host the Oscars. - Yeah, we're not gonna ask. - So they better. - We would like to host the Oscars and have a TV show where we do all the things on the list. - Thank you. - Thank you. - Because people will watch it. I don't know why Hollywood is withholding our own Handsome TV show that we've put, we have nothings on a list. - Into. (laughing) - And we are willing to knock them off the list. We should spend one whole episode, like before we talked to our guests, rattling off everything that's on the list and having a good cackle about it. - Okay. - I mean, I wouldn't mind hearing some of it now. - Let's hear it. - Shall we hear some of it? - Give us a, give us just a couple. - The very beginning when this, what was the first thing that we were like, put that on the list? I can't guess. - The first one I have is get drunk and do a show together. - No. - That's easy. - That's really easy. - Okay. - You know when we do our Hollywood, when we do our Hollywood show this year, we can check that off. We can probably get to that. - Okay. - Except I don't drink. - But go ahead, Thomas. - What's the number two? - Maybe just have a drink? - Okay. - Yeah. - Maybe I'll eat a sleep gummy. - Oh, no. - And then you can get away. (laughing) - You're forcing yourself to stay up. - Yes, and you're forcing yourself on me. - Okay, Thomas, what is number two? - We go to the cheesecake factory. - We can easily do that. - We should do that and then go out to our show drunk, and hand some it up. - And put it up. - What's next? - All these things are so cheap. - I love the cheesecake factory. - We know we do for that. - We know. - We most of times, we can't put up some cheese cake. - Oh God. - Speaking of peanut butter, bitch. - I am so on a peanut butter banana toasted bread cake that I can't stop myself. In fact, Stephanie and I have an event tonight where I have to like blaze real fast, already made my peanut butter and banana toasted sandwich. - That's right. - And I yelled at my whole family, nobody touch my banana peanut butter sandwich. It's wrapped in a paper towel. Don't touch it. - Don't touch it. - Don't touch it. - And I'm scared to report. - Peanut butter, bitch right now. - So are you gonna wolf it down or like bring it in the car with you? - Ooh, you say wolf it down. I say wolf it down. - Whoa. - Wait, what? - Did you say the same thing? - I say wolf it. - You say wolf it. - You say wolf it. - Yeah, what do you say? - Wait, is it wolf it? - It's wolf it down. - No. - Two against one. Thomas, I'm pretty confident. - I would say wolf it down. - You say wolf it down. - Oh, wolf it down. - Idiot. Look, it's this side of the zoo. - How are we gonna find out? Let me Google. - Thomas is Google. - Thomas, what's next on the list? - The next thing is get a massage together. - This is so easy. - Oh, we need a cheat. - Why did we want that? - We need to keep May from being horny. - Horture Marie. And so we go for a massage. Then we go to the cheesecake factory. We get trash and we do our hand. What is it? - It's long, you and I are wrong. - It's our Southern roots. - It says the correct, according to this, the correct phrase is wolf it down. - Well, I am so deeply embarrassed. I just wanna log off and go have my sandwich and wolf it down. - Okay, I'm always at wolf it down. - Me too. - I think it's the south. - Cause dogs really go like cold, cold, cold, but I don't know if wolves do that. - But what does the dog noise have to do with what we're talking about? - Wolf in it down. - And did you also log off to say you and I were like, it's wolf. - Oh, yeah. - Okay, what else we got? What else on the list, Thomas? - The next one we kind of did, which was I have a handsome Holly Bob's holiday. - Oh, we did. - We did do that. - We did do that. - What's next? - Colonics. - Okay. (laughing) That's the day after our drunken cheesecake factory. (laughing) - We wanna do it together. - We wanna do it together. - We have to get our colonics done together. - In the same room, it's so intimate. - Well, so is this podcast, dear? - Yeah, you're right. - Yes, dear. - So that friend also picked Natalie Mainz up from her colonoscopy today. But it, - She's still there waiting. (laughing) - She's waiting right now. - But with her ass. - So they were like three hours behind, and I was behind. - Yeah. - And so one of her other friends is going, but I felt bad 'cause she picked me up from mine. So I'm gonna take her out to dinner to make up for her. - What if we do our colonics cheesecake? - Cheat to cheat. - Cheat to cheat. - Cheat to cheat. - Yes. - Lady. - His red. (laughing) - Did Natalie wear red? - I don't know. - Mm-hmm. - Texture. - She didn't send me a picture of her colonoscopy. (laughing) - Well, you wake up bloopy, and you could easily be sending out pictures of your, you know, of your behold in the air. - First of all. - Come again? - Thomas, what's next? - The next one is actually from our Natalie Mainz episode. - Oh my gosh. - This is so cool. - What a coincidence. - So magical. (laughing) - Take me, or teach me to drive stick shift. - Oh yeah. - I could easily do that, but we have to have access to a stick shift. - And helmets. (laughing) - Yeah. - May is you're driving getting better? - Well, how can I judge that? But yeah, I think it really is. I mean, I'm driving so much every day. - Have you still been driving into walls? - No walls. - I still get the odd honk. And the new thing, the new thing that's happened twice that's really worrying is, and it's happened twice, is someone honk in at me at night. And then I realized my lights aren't on. - Oh. - Put them on auto. - I thought they were. And I don't know how to get it back on auto. And also then I don't know which is my high beams and my, and then when they are on, I'm like, sometimes I'll pull over and just check that they are on. - Well, if it's on high beams, there's a little blue light that appears. - Yeah, and do you have two levels of high beams? 'Cause I have two modes that have the blue light on anyway. But other than that, it's going great. I'm listening to my true crime. - I love it. - I'm driving around. Well, if you ever find someone with a stick shift, I'll teach ya. - I just sold my old car with a stick shift a few years ago. So, well, I'm sorry. - We should have done this a few years ago. - Yeah. - Yeah. - Oh, I think I would feel really good driving stick shift. - Oh, that's fun, it's really fun. - You feel really one with the car. - Yeah, like you feel like you're doing something. - And you are, you're shifting gears for your feet are doing this. - And you go up and gear the faster you drive. - Uh-huh. - Gotcha. - You can feel it when it's time to shift up. - It sounds irritated with you. - 'Cause it's like, yeah, it's like, yeah, yeah, yeah. So then you need to shift up. - Okay. - Get your shift up. - I always did it as like, 'cause it's like one, two, three, four, five. I would, one is like your start, your park. And then 20 miles an hour was, I always thought it was two, 30 is three, 40 down, and then five, you're going faster. - Okay. - This episode. (laughing) - We're actually trying specific people, specific things. - I understand, is there anything else to us? So we should know. - I mean, there were a couple more from the Natalie Main's episode. There was dress up like pretty little ladies for prom, and there was triple date with your male crushes. - Oh, it's a must. - Was that the pineapple apart episode? - It might have been. - Oh, I wonder. - It feels like a really fruitful episode, you know what I mean? - And are these like celebrity male crushes or men in your life where you're like, you're my male crush? - Celebrity male crushes, we wanted to go for dinner, but I think mine's changed from Nick Offerman. I'm back on Haviet Bardem in a big way. - Oh, interesting. - Yeah. - Who is yours, fortune? - Who was magic mine? - Magic Tayden Tayden Tayden. - Yeah. - Wanted him to magic Mike Dance for me. - Who was mine? - Oh. - Billy Crutup. - Oh yeah. - Yeah. - It's Crutup. - Crutup. - I'm gonna Google it and just get it. (laughing) - Has your age changed? - Has your age changed? - Do I have a new male crush? I think that one's pretty subtle.
solid. Have you met him? I have. He's very funny. Very nice. And did you feel magic between you two? Oh, yeah. Absolutely. My love for Nick Offerman hasn't waned. I just suddenly became embarrassed at the idea of bumping into him and him having heard this. Do you know Nick? I heard you on the handsome podcast. Yeah, exactly about me. Yeah. I think I need to pick someone more remote. I'm sure Megan will be in a rage when she finds out. Kick my ass. Yes. No, they would be flattered. And they sure would. They'd probably welcome you into their fold. They would say, let's get that date going. Oh my God. What a triad. I'd be really into that. Now, should we get to our question? Yeah. Okay. Our guess. My eye is basically closed. Is it not? I'm better than the other days, to be honest. It's a little better than last time. Yeah. I did this event over the weekend and they had to take a picture of me for social media. And the guide I could tell was, what are you doing? What are you doing? I just want to get a little crushed ice. Are you drunk? No, continue. Okay. So I had to take this picture. Oh, and it was for Disney. And I was taking pictures with Mickey Mouse. And, and of course, my eye, every picture the guy took was close. And he was the photographer was so uncomfortable because he'd be like, um, okay, should we do another? He's like, what if I turn you? Yeah. Hold your eye open. Because I was like to see me with that. That was that D 23 event, right? Yes. Yes. How was he? You were on stage with Glenn Close and Neil Patrick Harris. Fun. Okay. I was hoping y'all were filming a new movie. Okay. Here I am with Mickey Mouse. Oh, yeah. There's nothing better than a Mickey photo. I do love that. Look at those bell bottoms. Yeah. Well, I was in character because Glenn Close came on stage as Cruella DeVille and me and Neil, Neil, Neil Young. That's not right. Neil Patrick Harris. It couldn't be more different. Me and Neil Patrick Harris were like flanking her as like the, yeah, yeah, yeah. I really wanted this to be a sequel to her previous movie. Well, you know, backstage, Neil said, what is your connection with Disney? And I was like, I don't know. I mean, I have a recurring character on a Star Wars animation show, but nothing. And then I Google myself. I'm like, what have I done with this zootopia? Oh, my God. Oh, my God. You went to the bathroom. Anyway, you're seen. It was a good time. That's funny. Handsome is brought to you by Squarespace. Squarespace is the all-in-one platform designed to help you stand out and succeed online with a handy handsome website you can be proud of and show off to all your friends, clients and loved ones. With Squarespace, you can scale up your business, claim your domain and showcase your offerings with a premium professional website. 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Do you think my integral are characters will be reprised? How can they not have y'all's characters? They would have to. I get recognized from Zootopia all the time. All right, let's get to our question. I'm very thrilled about this because this is a man who I really love. Today's question asker is an actor, a writer and a comedian who played Barry on the Big Bang Theory and Jimmy on Speechless. He plays Barry once again on the new HBO Max show, Stuart fails to save the universe. He was also in Feel Good. And he's my neighbor. He's your neighbor? No way. Yeah, he was in season two of Feel Good. We kissed in that show. My goodness. He was so great in that show. John Ross Bowie is asking today's question. Hi, handsome question for you. I've been working on this show. Stuart fails to save the universe. It's a shameless plug. Explain to take what a television show is. And I've been thinking a lot about the idea of the multiverse. I was wondering if there was a particular time period you guys would want to go back and live in. I would assume we're allowed. And how dare you, John? How dare you? I'm assuming he means any time period in history, not just that you've lived through that you want to go back to. Yeah. Okay. Oh, man. I know what mine is. Old timey days seem awful. I have always wanted to live in either like, you know, Western or pioneering kind of. I hear what I want. Yeah, I want to like put on some boots and walk into a saloon. I hear you cowboy here. You know, hear my boots clanking on the the the wood and swinging the doors open. Yeah. Yeah. Tell me the weeds and I wouldn't mind being a whore from back then. You don't mean in a whore house. Guys. Fortune. It's all free. It's in every Western movie. There's a whore house. Okay. Well, not our little fortune, Marie. You are not the town whore. The town whore. Yeah. That's I've always had an interest in like, you know, me. I love a bonnet. Like a Billy the Kid type of days? I don't know. You know me. I didn't go to school. I don't know what you're saying the prairie. Yeah. Yeah. Little house on the prairie, but also, you know, John Wayne times, you know, I heard like the good, the bad and the ugly times. Like, would you be a cowboy in a bonnet? Oh, of course not. Of course not. Here's the problem with me. Is I if I get like tossed back in time as I am. I had spinal fusion and I can't ride a horse. So we're going to have to be in a wagon, going to have to be in a covered wagon.
But I think in this scenario, you're going back with a clean slate. Really? I think so. We're old. You're going back in time. That's the thing. We're old. We're old. We're old. We're old. We're old. Why do you have a spinal intertree? Well, 'cause I was snowboarding. Oh, yeah. I'm like, is the only, uh, like one, maybe the 90s, because any other time, there's so much, I mean, there's still so much inequality. I want to be before 2016, before Trump, but still in recent enough times that like, you know, people care about equality and stuff, because I'd be curious to see other times what I'd be spooked. I'd love to see, I'd love to see, like 1969 would be pretty good, but to live, I'd like to live in the 90s, but as an adult, because I was a kid, I didn't appreciate it. Mm-hmm. And you're not going to join me with a bonnet. I wouldn't mind being your pretty little idiot with a bonnet in a horse-covered wagon stop a lot of our house to see the fortune. Yeah. Our horror, our local horror. What are y'all doing in here? Wait, what's the accent? Not that. Y'all are coming in for a good time. You're going to have to leave your coins on the bar and your morals outside. I love her. Is that-- You can have her. Hey. The 90s. It felt like we were moving in the right direction, and I want that optimism. You could be a part of the real world, the original real world, or season two in San Francisco. What about the real world, little house on the real world, am I right? Just being the real world. But fortune, is that what you think of with the 90s, you went to the real world? Whoa. The real world, San Francisco. Whoa. I think of Nirvana. Pedro Zero. That's what I think, too. That's partly-- I'm like, I want to be at that unplugged Nirvana show. The Grunge, yeah. Yeah. I don't like the unplugged Nirvana. Oh, you want unplugged. Yeah. I'm like, look. Why do I need Nirvana unplugged? The whole point of Nirvana is to plug it in and rock it so hard. Right. And I am a massive Nirvana fan, but hard pass on the unplugged. I didn't know he was left handed. Yes, he was left handed. Did you see that documentary about him that had all his drawings? I was amazing. Yeah. Yeah. So the era of two-pock, true, fortunes, speaking the truth right now. And we're left now. I kind of-- I want to go back to any time before I knew about the Epstein Falls that I could still trust in some kind of system that we-- Yeah, but it's good you know now, so you're not trusting in the systems that are completely corrupt. But I feel so powerless. Like, Woody Allen's making a new movie. And like, people, we know we're going to be in it, I bet. It's crazy. Oh, fortune? I don't know. They just announced some cast fortune if you're in it. Some fortune if you're in it. That's the show. A little horror on the periphery. Fortune, what time period are you wanting to be in, is it that? Well, now I've got to want to be a little horror on the periphery. Oh, my God. I don't want to be in that show. You got to touch winners then. I would have to touch winners. I don't know about that. That's Fortune's porn. It's touch and weeners with fortune things, touch and with one figure. Oh, my God. Yeah, I forgot about that part. Touch and weeners and porns. Yeah, I don't want to touch weeners. Yeah. They're probably not coming at you a lot. No. It's a dusty village, but in the Western times it was slim pickings. Yeah. Yeah. I'd actually think I'd have been pretty popular. I'm sure you would. Because I'd have been a big all-hore. I don't know that we're allowed to keep saying that word. Really? Yeah. It's their sex workers, but I guess we're talking about the times where they-- I'm talking about the times of the Westerns. Right. Yeah, yeah, yeah. What is that movie, "Best Little Horehouse" in Texas? "Best Little Sex Worker House" in Tejas. In Tejas? Is that how you pronounce it? What? Tejas? Yeah. I think I would like to be in the-- I was-- I'm torn between two eras, the 20s, because I feel like you're a flapper girl. Like, yeah, it was a flapper orn and a nice tuxedo. And I feel like there were gays around doing their thing, and people didn't really care. Marlene and Dietrich. Yeah. You're in Berlin. And there's like-- I feel like there was people weirdly enough, a little bit more freer, as far as like-- Wasn't it the gay 20s? The gay 20s. The gay 20s. They were a little bit freer to be themselves and drink and have a good time. And it was just like a little less of like homophobic. As far as I know, I mean, historians could be like-- I mean, gays-- I mean, gays-- I mean, gays-- Gays are having a terrible time. Yeah. I mean, a lot of people are having a terrible time in different eras, but you know, I feel like the gays were under the radar, maybe. It was like a thriving subculture, I think. Yeah. Having subculture was having a good time in the flappers and the dresses. And then in the thirties, they all scattered like rats and were like, I'm out of here going into hiding. Well, then things got dark and scary times and wars and all that stuff. But that-- so that's kind of intriguing. Or the era of the-- a league of their own, the baseball-- the lady baseball teams. Yeah. The men were all the-- The men went to war. Oh, that was like the forties. Like, I don't know what year was that. If the men were at war, it's like the-- The men went to war. So the ladies got to go to work on each other. That's right. And they got to play baseball-- on the baseball team. So I would have loved to be on one of those baseball teams, not in the skirts as much. Right. Not even like Rosie O'Donnell. But she not in a skirt. She was in a skirt, but I just would have been very like, you know. Yeah. I loved Abby Jacobson made the remake of that show and they only did one season, but it was so good. Yeah. Yeah, it was so, so good. So I would have been into that where, yeah, the men are off the war, so I'm going to take care of the ladies. And you're having a lot of like lingering glances with each other. Yeah, there's just a lot of lonely women around that just need a shoulder to cry on. And I would have just, you know, been there for them. Mm-hmm. That's honorable. Yeah. That's your heart. We hear John's answer. I think we should since we asked him to submit a question. I was so nervous to meet him. He flew over to England to film and I was, I like barely acted and I was so nervous. And then he was so, when we met up, he was, because you like him on big bang, more like, because I knew what our scenes were going to be. Oh, I see. Yeah, I loved his, his, and his, when we read together, it was so good, but then we were into all the same, all the same niche nerd stuff and he's a big like Beatles comedy nerd and I was great. Yeah. For me, even though I was technically around, New York in the 70s would be fun. But to do it as an adult, not as like a five-year-old, I think that would be really interesting. Just because I could, I could go see, you know, talking heads and CDs and that would be awesome. And Brent was really cheap, who's also really dangerous, but Brent was really cheap. That's, that's, that's my answer. That's, that's classic John for you, always looking for a deal. Okay. New York in the 70s was pretty dangerous, though. That's a taxi driver time, right? Like, is the 80s when it turned around? Is that what you want to turn around? I can't remember. I feel like the 80s was when it was like being run by Mafia everywhere. Okay. Imagine New York in the 60s, you get to stumble into see like Bob Dylan playing some little club and that would be, it would be good. And some of those famous lesbian singers, I bet they had a bunch of lady parties. Secret lady. You're looking for, in every period, like the secret gay parties. Yeah. When, ever in the 70s, or no, that would have been more, but that would be more nineties. I mean, there's more nineties, who are you talking about Lilith Fair and I love her. It would have been fun. That would be fun. I didn't get to see it. I did. I would like to, I would like to see it, but like get to hang out with everybody. I was there. Sarah Glowlin, what would you think? I loved it. It actually surprisingly never crossed my mind to go to it, but this girl I was hanging out with at the time, got us tickets. We went and saw Lilith Fair together and I was like, well, this is, and actually the chicks. [BLANK_AUDIO]
stand out for me. I was like, this banjo work that's going on. I mean, sign me up all day. Yeah, yeah. God, they were good. And yeah, it was fun. And I can't beth, beth, Olsen. Oh, I can't remember her name. Side stage, she was doing a song. I don't know if her name was that beth, Olsen. You know, the chicks are doing right now, um, getting a camera and one of their they want to they want to do more intimate shows so they're doing a tour where they're just playing theaters. Oh, nice. And they're only playing songs from an album, like a particular album. It's the one, which album? It's the one, not ready to make nice. Oh, that's good. And so the whole show is that album. And it's in like a very intimate theater. Wow. I felt that was such a cool idea. So this is awesome. A pretty cool experience for people, but I think they're going to try to do it on a lot of if it goes well, it started sold out most places, but I think they might do it. Some, what's some other albums? When is it? I think it starts September, October. Okay. Well, I'll be in LA. Get us some tickets. Get us some tickets. I'm busy in November, because why? I, thanksgiving. Why? No, I found out that I got, I begged, I got my publicist to reach out and I did get two tickets to a Lannis Morris. It's stage show in Vegas. She's not going to meet you. So you're a whole month, so you're a whole month of November. You're going to be doing that. I've got a prep. I got to get on the zone. And what does that look like when you prep to me, to Lannis listening to our albums, going to the gym, you know, spirit, getting spiritual. So wait, you got your publicist to get you what? To get to her show, because it's a hot ticket item. Is this the biggest one? Butterfly with a machete. I don't really know much about it. I think it's like a one woman show, like a, that's with her music in it. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, why didn't she send out invites? But where is it? It's in L.A. Oh, in L.A. Yeah, and but maybe when she's in town, because she's just doing a short run here, maybe we could try to go to my calendar in case she wants to meet up with me. If you and me, if you show up that on my calendar, you know what? Fortune, we should hang out with the Lannis and Paul McCartney. On the day that I go to that show, and I'm literally, I mean, I, I met her with you fortune and then you were the chosen one. Oh, I remember. But it was blew up the podcast. If I'm watching the show and I'm in heaven, I'm right in the front and then you walk out on stage. No, this is a plan stage show, so it's, I don't think there's any room for special guests, but you never know. I think we know. At the very least, I'll have to go see Lannis before or after the show. She'll be like, all right, everyone but me. Meet me back. We're teasing. The most isn't time we should, we should try to get her on the pod. She'll be in town. I'm sure for like a week or two. When is it? Second week in November, I think. Or first week, it's like November 5th, 6th. Oh, I'll be here because my L.A. show, I'm doing my own L.A. show. November 7th. Made me a Lannis wants to come to my show. Well, cancel her show and come down. No, no, oh, because she's going to be perform, will she be performing on the 7th? I know. There's no, I'm at Largo on the 6th. I'm going to have to reach out to Lannis and tell her to tell Lannis. She needs to move it. Yeah. Yeah. For Lannis, if you're listening and she is, roll through November 7th through. Yeah, my L.A. show. No, I thought you were saying roll through the podcast. Oh, and the podcast. There's an open invitation for Lannis to be on this handsome pod. Yes. You mean in person, with in person. Yeah. Yeah. She's the only one that has an open invitation to our podcast. Honestly, we've invited nobody else to be on our podcast as far as in-person guests. Lannis for the love of God or ginger. That's a Lannis ginger in person. Yes. Yes. Yeah. Yeah. Can I say, you know, you said the John Prime song will make me cry. Can I say a song that is killing me these days? Yeah. Yeah. It's called Gentle Like the Drugs by Charlotte Cornfield. Cornfield. She's Canadian. So it's Canadian. The chorus. Oh my God. It's just simple piano chords. I've been trying to learn it on the piano and just playing it. You don't love it. Do you know what songs making me sad? What? Like anyone would. Oh, how are you? Yeah. I'm flattered by your fascination with me. Pretty Carl, I was been singing that one. I sounded a lot like both of them combined. Yeah. Well, no fascination with me. Exactly. Thomas, how's your, how's your little dog doing? They're both doing great. My, my dog that I adopted is in her crate because she can be a little naughty if she's not supervised. Oh, are you projecting? Did I'm a little naughty when I'm? Yes. Thomas, you've been naughty. Notty little boy. All the carpet in our house. Yeah. Yeah. Don't we know about chewing carbon? I don't get it. I don't get it. Any hoosers. All right. I'm going to launch into where I'm going to be because this podcast just ended and I don't mean the episode. We are never, ever doing this again. We are. Okay. September 9th. I'll be in Iowa city and then I'll be in Des Moines and Omaha, Oklahoma city Cincinnati Charleston, West Virginia, Chattanooga, Knoxville, Chico, Olympia, Fresno, Napa, Wilmington, Delaware, Terry Town, New York, New London, Connecticut, Colorado Springs, Colorado, steamboat springs, basalt. Also, always can catch me locally at Largo or dynasty type writer and Los Angeles. And you know what? I've decided I'm going to change my local show in LA. Take note, folks. It's going to be a surprise. Whether it's going to be stand up, whether it's going to be a talk show, whether it's going to be crowd work, whether it's going to be a variety show, whether I stand on stage alone and just sing songs. Why do I feel like it's going to be that one? So it'll be whatever you want it to be. It is a real mixed bag because I just, I have a few different ideas for shows that I want to do. And sometimes I just don't want to do stand up. And I want to do a circus situation. Did you hear about the clown accident? No, it was intense. I knew that was coming. See, I didn't. I turned red. I started blasting as I said. Can I tell you? Because you delivered it and then you went. Here's the thing is if anybody says to me, did you hear about, I just assume I'm about to get great news because I'm still off Instagram. And so I'm like, what happened? I'm so curious to hear. I'm so curious how many big things I have missed. So many. Have I? Imagine if people don't listen to the part where we plug what we're up to. They would miss the big clown joke. That's right. I got nothing coming up except I'm locally at Largo all the time. And I'm just writing at the moment. But check out social media to see what's coming up. Or you can always stream my music. That's helpful. Or watch, feel good to see John Ross Bowie. Yeah. Well, I'm on the tail end of my tour. So all I have left starting with Boise, Portland, Oregon, Austin, Texas, Chattanooga, Dayton, Ohio, Louisville, Madison, Wisconsin, Durham, North Carolina, Oakland, Bakersfield, Santa Barbara, and Los Angeles, and Palm Springs, California. And then Filmy Must Special in Denver, Colorado, and then cap it it off at the rhyme in the Nashville. Love it. Yeah. That's exciting stuff. It's very exciting. Go to handsomepod.com for merchandise. And please subscribe, rate, review, wherever you get your podcasts. Go to YouTube. Sign up there. Check us out on Hulu a day before. You can get this magic one day before. One day more. No, one day before. Anyway,
♪ One more day, one more time ♪ - Please share this episode. - This is probably your favorite episode if you're listening. - Oh, and if you wanna know about credit card points and things like that. - The episode for you. - Yes, share this episode with your friends, families, loved ones, your enemies, even. Bring 'em in to this community. - Share it with your enemies 'cause they have great taste and podcasts. - Yeah, and until next time. - Keepin' it awesome. - Hanson is hosted by me, May Martin, Tignotaro, and Fortune Feemster. The show is produced, recorded and edited by Thomas Willett. Email us at
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