It's baby time!

Olen Shannon Maldonado, käsintehtyjä artesaanitua teita myyvän jaujialahjakaupan perustaja. Valitsin Shopify, koska alustoja testatessani totesin sen ehdottomasti yhdeksi helpokäyttöisimmistä alustoista. Minulla oli tärkeää pohtia kehittymistämme tulevaisuudessa. Kaikki myyntiin tarvittavat työkalut, kuten varaston suunnittelu ovat kätevästi dashboardissa. Aloita ilmainen kokeilu Shopify piste komsi vustolla. Kuten kokeilu? Kuten varaston suunnittelu, kuten varaston suunnittelu, kuten varaston suunnittelu, kuten varaston suunnittelu, kuten varaston suunnittelu, kuten varaston suunnittelu, kuten varaston suunnittelu, kuten varaston suunnittelu, kuten varaston suunnittelu, kuten varaston suunnittelu, kuten varaston suunnittelu, kuten varaston suunnittelu, kuten varaston suunnittelu, kuten varaston suunnittelu, kuten varaston suunnittelu, kuten varaston suunnittelu, kuten varaston suunnittelu, kuten varaston suunnittelu, kuten varaston suunnittelu. - I feel that way. - I don't know. I think I have to feel that way or else you lose the mental game. - Oh yeah. How are you handling all this so well? You just do a few parts. - I'm not. - I come home from the gym and there's a herd of toddlers at our pool and you're just hanging out. How are you handling that? It's impressive. - I feel you haven't really grow cheese lately. I don't think I'm handling it the best. - You feel grow cheese? - I feel grow cheese. - Why and buy people over to our house? Was that just like a spur of the moment game? - It just kind of happens. - That doesn't make me more grouchy, I don't think. - Oh, okay. Did that make you happy to have people over? - Yeah, I hang out with them every day. I can hang out with you at my house. I can hang out with you at a trampoline park. I was already planning on hanging out with them. - Our house was certainly a mess when they came over, but that's my motto with hosting. It's better to have people over than to feel like you can't have people over unless it's perfect. - I honestly don't know how you do it though because you're pregnant, growing a baby. You're running a mascara brand that just launched and sold out. You run two different podcasts. You have Instagram, TikTok and a YouTube channel. Is there something that I'm missing? Full-time mom? I don't know how you do it all, girl. - You've got a lot of help. - You're impressive. - No, it's not like I'm doing it alone. We're doing it together. - They're doing it together. - Yeah, you're right. But I'm not growing a baby. - Yeah, no, you're not doing that. - Yeah, so I'm, you're awesome. - Thank you. - So when did the grouchyness start? When did you start feeling the grouchy? The grouch come out? - Maybe like 37 weeks. - What was it? Was there like a certain thing that was just like-- - I think it's hormones. - Ah, okay. Okay. - I don't know. Just like right now I feel grouchy. - You do. You do. - Yeah. - Did I say something that pissed you off? - I don't know. It's like it's not you. I know it's me, but it is you. - I made a mistake. I-- - What did I say? I said something about like, "Yeah, well, you know, the baby could come anywhere from now or in the next three weeks." - No, yesterday. - Yeah, in my head it was like-- - How did I say it in your head? - Like you were diminishing the way that I felt currently. - Oh gosh. - Because it's like, "You still have three weeks." And I was like, "Shut the F up." Like, I don't know what-- How did it come out? - That's the thing. Wording words sometimes are hard for me. And I feel like if I'm not ultra clear in the communication and like the way that I'm saying it, then I'm like, "Oh gosh, I don't." - Like it's one thing for me to be like, "It could be three weeks from now." And it's another thing for you to be like, "Buckle up, girl. It could be three." - I did not say that. I didn't know. - You didn't say it that way. - I did not say it that way. Maybe that's how you interpreted it. Maybe that's like, maybe that was a story that you're choosing to tell yourself. - Maybe. - Yeah. - Maybe. - That's good. I like that line. I like the story that I'm choosing to tell myself. - I think it's now it's just like so much of my energy has gone towards having these contractions that aren't like real. That I'm like, "I don't have the energy to like, I don't feel like I have the energy reserves to just be chipper and smiley." - Do you feel at peace now that I have installed the baby's car seat car. - I'm so glad you did that. That was bothering me. - It's all set up, fully installed. - That's crazy. - Is there anything else that's lingering on your mind? - Well, I did realize yesterday we never registered at the hospital. - I guess that's when we have to do. - You do have to do that. - Okay. So let's do that then. - I did. - Oh, you did. It's done. - I think it should be done now. - Oh, thanks for doing that. - I think I need to follow up and make sure that that's done. - Would they deny us if you're in labor and we should-- - I can't imagine they would deny you, but I think that you could probably, it would take you longer to maybe get in a room and stuff. - Yeah. - And I don't think that's something we really want to do. It's just like, hang out. - Yeah. - Not in a room there. - Let me just say, I chose the wrong day to install our child's car seat though. - There's not a right day in Arizona. - Goodness Abby. So you asked me to do it yesterday and I was like, then work got in the way. And so I ended up like having to push it off till today. But to be honest, part of the thing that was just like, I was dreading. I was like, oh my gosh, I'm going to sweat so much installing this thing. And I did. It was a hundred and seven. - Yeah, and you're not really a sweaty guy. - I'm not. Yeah. - You know, I got to give you props. - What? - You're not gross. - I'm not gross. - I think a lot of boys are kind of gross. - Really? - I don't think you're gross. - Why are so many boys gross? - Poor hygiene. - Okay. - And like, dirty. - And like, with their space and living stuff. - Ah, yeah. - You're not dirty. And you're not gross. You have good hygiene. - I feel like I keep being pretty clean. - Maybe it's just because I like your fair mones. - Oh, yeah. You do like this smell like me. You'll like wear my shirts and stuff. There's like science to that, isn't there? - I don't know. It's like, I don't know. I think I learned that from like, oh and a baby is like sad missing their mom. - Yeah. - That's weird. - You like my scent. - Like, is there something in particular that I do that is like so tidy and not like messy or nasty? - You know? - You just, you don't stink. - But I feel like sometime, the one thing that I get comments on those is you'll be like, your breath is rank. - Yeah, because you think that if you drink coffee, you don't have to brush your teeth. - That is not what I think. That is not what I think. - Matt, say it right now. - Say what right now. - I'm not pulling this out of nowhere. - What? - You are wrong. You say that if you don't, if you drink coffee, then you don't need to brush your teeth in the morning. - Okay. Well, well, first of all, first of all, I am a hundred and ten percent team brush your freaking teeth. That is like, I brush my teeth every day, okay? - Once a day. - But sometimes I don't do it in the mornings because I got in a really bad habit after going through the newborn stage. - This is not our baby's fault. - I don't even know. - Well, it's something that I could fix now, but then we're also about to have another newborn. So it's probably having to fall right back into that habit. - No, you can still brush your teeth today. - But when you are so tired and then you're waking up with your kid and then there's all this stuff to do, then it's like, oh my gosh, it's noon. I haven't even brushed my teeth. And so usually what I do is I would wait until I've gone to the gym hopefully and worked out. And then I'll brush my teeth at noon because then it's like, I get it all done when I'm like showering because I don't shower before the gym, that'd be weird to shower like before and after. - Yeah, okay. Basically you're making a lot of excuses. - Okay. - But you tell me that if you drink coffee, then your breath doesn't stink. - I think I have coffee breath. - But you're also putting milk in your coffee. - I think you get coffee breath if you drink coffee. - But there's milk in it. It's a latte. - That's true. - So that makes it really stinky. - Okay. Well, I'm sorry. - It's okay. - That's something that's, that's the area of improvement I could focus on. - That's the one thing that you're kind of gross about. - Okay. Anyway, nesting, we have a bass and net all set up. - Yes. - We've got the baby monitor set up. We've got a bottle wash station set up. We've got all these things and, oh, I went into our shed, pulled out all the baby clothes, threw those in the wash, used the non-centred laundry detergent because apparently babies don't like scented stuff. - Oh, it's just, it can irritate their skin. - That's right. - And, you know, so we're doing all the things and everything's good to go. - It's pretty, it's as good as, we don't have a nursery. - Yeah, I get, you know, that's the thing. I think we did a nursery for Griffin, our first born. - We haven't done one since. - And since then, you know. - Because our babies stay in our room for really long time. - Yeah, yeah. And also, if you make a really cute nursery, my opinion is if you're going to go all out on your kids' room, I feel like the age to do it would be maybe when they're five or six. - That's actually a good point. - I think like five or six you do it and then maybe when they go into middle school, you redo their room again and then high school you do it again. Because then that's like three different stages. But if you're sending it on the nursery, then you have to redo all of that in like a year because it's really not going to be the right theme for a toddler. You know? You're not going to want all the rainbow. Like your toddler is going to want to have like Darth Vader and sports and stuff. Like if Oggy had like rainbows in his room, he'd be like-- - Well, it just start now with a Darth Vader nursery. - That's true. How funny would that be? - They would love that. - If it's like a Darth Vader-shaped crib, it's like the baby sleeps inside. - And it's like a Millennium Falcon. - Yes, how sick would that be? - No, the Death Star. - I will tell you, if I've thought about this, like I see some of these dad DIYers and I'm not a handyman by any means but I think it'd be fun to like make to do something epic in one of our kids rooms you know kind of like how I build a half pipe in her backyard it would be cool to just like send it on our kids room. Well Griffin and Oggy think that this baby's moving into their room once he's done staying in our room. I mean he really could. I don't know if they don't sleep all together though. That feels crazy. That feels absolutely crazy but they're already getting I feel like I feel like they're gonna adjust really well because they already talk all the time like they got a couple toys for the baby yeah and they were like yelling at their friends which isn't nice but they're like don't touch that that's for baby like they like are already getting like protective of his stuff they're already like talking about like what's his and how it's gonna work. It was really sweet how you had the boys pick out toys for their baby brother but they kind of just ended up picking out toys that they wanted. We made them pick out baby toys though. Yeah but they they ended up like we got home and they started playing with the baby toys they picked out. Yeah. Yeah and fighting and fighting over the baby toy. Yeah that's true. For their brother. So that's just that's just called having kids you know what's new. Almost three and a four year old. Exactly. Okay so what are you noticing like now that you're feeling you're in the stage of pregnancy. You're ready for this baby to get out. What what are you noticing is helping with the grouchiness like what helps you feel better in your day. Nothing. Here's my question. How the heck are you still working out? Actually I think I like being alone a little bit more now. You like being alone. Okay. But I actually feel like I feel that way but then I also like feel really attached to you like and I think that's actually maybe normal. Like towards the end I'm like I just am really scared of like you not being around me. Like I want you to you're like my comfort person. God. Even though I'm not like pleasant like I'm like you still got to be here. So that's a tough place for you to be in. Because I'm like I'm going to be grouchy but I need you right next to me. Got it. You got to suffer through me. I mean I feel like I haven't been that bad though. Do you think? No I was telling you this like you've been so nice to me this pregnancy. Feel like you're just honestly you're I think you're you've been the best version of yourself that I've ever gotten to know. I got to get back to that. I think for the past three days since I've been 37 weeks I just got grouchy and I just got to get started up. Well it's probably really hard to feel all that movement in your in your stomach and also it's the exhaustion. So like I've been having probably what you would call Prodromal labor which is like where I've never even heard of that. What is that? Yeah it's like where you're having contractions. They're like not real okay. But they're intense enough that I like it's hard to get comfortable and it's hard to sleep. What does Prodromal mean? I don't know what does Prodromal mean. Fake. Where did you learn that word? It means fake. I know what a Braxton Hick is but I've never heard of it. It's what it is. Oh okay it's another way of it's the same thing. It's just consistent like long drawn out Braxton Hicks. That make it so I couldn't sleep. So I've been up a lot of nights just like with like that tightening. I wouldn't say it hurts. I would honestly have been like go out if they hurt because then I was like oh then that means that it's progressing somewhere. Yeah. But it was just intense. Yeah. But it wasn't hurting. So then I was just like well this is just a really weird place to be in because I'm just can't sleep but it's not like go time. Yeah. So then I was like up I was up for the day at essentially 1.30 a.m. Yeah you got you got hit with pregnancy insomnia which is insomnia is horrible. Like people that deal with insomnia I dealt with that for a brief moment like a year ago. Oh gosh like that sucks. So what did you what do you do? Well it's already so tired from being pregnant but then you're also extra tired because I've been having like these contractions and then you can't sleep. So it's just a little bit crazy and I feel like your risk of. I mean I feel like probably your chance of experiencing pro-dromal labor has to go up with each pregnancy because I just feel like my body is like oh we know what to do but it's like but wait it's not the time so don't start sounding the alarms yet. It's not the worst thing ever but it certainly is not not fun. Yeah I just can't believe it. I can't believe you're dilated to three and a half centimeters right now. I mean what it's it is but it's like what's the point. At the last pregnancy appointment the doctor literally could feel the baby when when she you know did did the check the cervical check or whatever. Yeah I don't know. Feels like we could just hang out here for a while though you know. Yeah. I didn't realize well in the past last two pregnancies you never really got to that far. We just didn't never check for the schedule C section but I was having like those bracts and hicks. You were okay. So I don't know really what that case was you know it's hard to know. Yeah. But yeah so I mean really what they say is baby could come now baby could come on his due day and we know that like the baby's not going to go past his due day or it will all be induced on that day if he's not here before then. But yeah we'll see I'm so curious but also I'm like I do know that he's going to come at the right time and that'll be that but right now we're just in a weird limbo where it's just like we're making plans we're still doing stuff all the time but it's like okay are we going to actually do that though like is our life going to be completely different at that point yeah because I know that like once once you go into the hospital and like you have that baby like it feels like the that version of yourself that made those plans is a totally different person and so it's like I'm so I'm so anticipating like that big shift happening but it's like but when is it going to happen yeah it's exciting and I feel like we're in a good place because it's like we did nest we have like everything like pretty much ready like which is great because I feel like for all the longest time we had nothing really done I mean we don't have a nursery which is we'll be fine yeah but yeah support for today's episode comes from square the business platform that helps sellers become neighborhood favorites whether you're gearing up for a busy season or just trying to keep up with everyday demand square keeps your business running smoothly from payments and POS to online orders inventory staff and more all in one place so you can focus on your customers not your to-do list something I love about the area that we live in is that there are so many small businesses I'm talking cute little bakeries coffee shops children stores almost every single one of those local businesses use square and as a customer it's super easy to use but also as the business owner they really make the process simple for you square turns real-time data into useful insights that help businesses make smarter decisions swear shows up when it matters most you'll always know where they're headed and that they're building for you square helps you run your business more smoothly bringing payments operations and insights together in one place so you're ready for whatever's next right now listeners can get up to two hundred dollars off square hardware when you sign up at square.com/go/unplanned that's squ-ar-e.com/go/unplanned get started with square and build a setup that works the way you do so you're you're pumping now you're actively pumping I mean I did pump yesterday for the first time okay have you did you pump today if you let twice or literally only one time no I actually was reminded of how much I really don't like pumping is it is it the contractions that start to happen it's just like you're experiencing it but you don't have your baby yeah yeah the contractions aren't funny there but yeah I'm like maybe well hopefully I don't have to pump a ton this pregnancy or what hopefully I don't have to pump a ton with this baby yeah but yeah I was pumping got some colostrum so this is the first time we're saving it I guess I guess we'll save it because I feel like with little babies sometimes they're takes a minute for your milk to come in and sometimes their blood sugar can drop and I feel like they've always been really pushing the hospital with both times like with wanting to give them formula and I'm like I'd rather you just gave them this colostrum yeah instead so maybe we'll have to find a way to bring that to the hospital or yeah how would we bring that and then I guess we'll just have to put it in the little syringes that Adi brought and then freeze it and then as soon as we get there put it in their freezer okay so okay that's an extra step so we can bring it we can make that happen we can bring it frozen and then let it like thaw out I mean it'll be in tiny syringes so I feel like you'd barely have to leave it out and it would thaw and then they can just put it in like you just put squeezed a little syringe in their mouth syringes like we we'd like feed our baby with a syringe I mean it's one of those things you only do like literally the first like three days of their life okay and then they start eating gosh you forget isn't it so weird like you forget yeah like all of it like he's gonna have like a little umbilical cords to get out of his belly it's gonna be weird like the all the onesies are so tiny I know that we went through um getting all the clothes folded and put in put in do you think it's just gonna snap back into place I think we'll quickly get there I think we will okay like did you think that we would have I would have more confidence at this point yeah I kind of thought I would have more confidence but I I don't know I think I think we'll get it like I think we'll we have we don't really have an option and I think our most confidence we had was before we had babies And then now that we have babies, I feel like we just keep losing confidence. You should have no idea. Yeah, because you're just like, man, so much of this is like actually out of my hands. And I think that's a better place to be because it's like you then you just take the, you roll with the punches more because you're like, this was, you know, this was gonna happen either way. I don't have control over this. 100%. But then it is just like, now we're on this place, we're like, well, we're at Crossroads, we're about to cross into a whole different life. Yeah, because like our family that we've like known it will be totally different forever after this point. And it's just kind of like, wow. That's, and that's a big thing. And that's why I was starting to get more emotional too about like our kids, like our two boys, like it's going to be sad, like in a way, like we want this baby so bad. And we have for so long and we're so excited. But then also there's just like a certain sadness for like our family unit as it was. Yeah, you're right. You're right. I mean, that season of life is is basically over. Yeah, because I know that I know what how it's going to be like once we have this baby, then it'll be like we kind of even almost like forgot about that version of our family. You know, it's hard to remember a version of our two boys before they could talk. I like it. It's like I forgot. That's what I'm saying. It's like I've forgotten that they were ever newborns. Maybe, maybe my brain just like made me forget about that stage because it was so just forget it so quick. Yeah, I guess like your brain only has so much capacity for memory, right? My brain has no capacity. We've both lived so much life already. I was actually, this is so, this is so morbid. I was like laying in bed last night. And I was like, okay, if I quadrupled my age, that would that would mean that I would be a hundred and twelve. Like if like if I've definitely lived, this is this is what I'm talking about. Like why do you have to keep doing giving me a crisis? Like at random times, this is the worst time for a crisis. It's weird though to think about like how much of the percentage of our life we've lived. See that's not the time. Not the time. Not the time. Okay. But we have, I think we have a lot of life left to live. I'm just saying we've lived a lot of life already. There's a lot more hopefully. I mean, you know, but, but, you know, we just, I guess our brains only have so much memory capacity before you have to kind of throw some memories away. I was trying to always add like it's inside out. You know the scene and inside out were like, I get rid of it. They take the memory and they go, and they like get rid of all those memories when joy and sadness are walking through the the stream of memories, the library of memories. Speaking of, speaking of movies, I feel like we've entered that stage with you being so pregnant and having so much going on. We're kind of like in that spot where it's just like, sometimes we have to just turn on a movie for the kids so we can go set things up, go get a bass and that set up, go get different things prepped for our house. You know, it's, it's kind of, like I think when you first become a parent, you think like, I'm not doing screen time. Like we're not, we're not ever doing that. And then you kind of hit a point where you're like, I think I need a little bit of screen time here and there to help me actually get life done. I wonder what people, like people 100 years ago, I guess they just kind of like let their kids get hurt a lot more. Like I feel like if, if your kid is just like playing in the backyard while you're trying to, you know, nest and set up baby stuff, right? Like if you're, well they probably didn't do as nearly as much prep as we do nowadays. That's true. And people, but people used to have like seven kids. I do think kids just like started to tag along with the parents more. That's true. But that is one of those things where it's like it just takes a lot longer if they're like in our space when we're trying to do those things. Okay, let's jump to talking about the recent pregnancy appointment we had. This is the final ultrasound. Yes. Of this pregnancy. What big news did we learn? Well, I feel like the last scan you have for a lot of big reasons. A lot of them is like to estimate the baby's size, which was going to be a big factor in finalizing our birth plan. Yeah. You want to make sure the baby's in a good position for birth. Your placenta isn't a good position like all those things. And everything really looks good. He's head down. His, he's like pretty much fully posterior. We had that problem with our first like going sunny side up is what they call it. And it's just not a favorable position to like deliver a baby in. Obviously he can still flip. I don't think he'll flip not head down, but he could flip face up again still. They kind of tell you also like if you're dilated, you're a basement, which is like your thickness of your cervix and your station that the baby's in like in your pelvis. And we also found out that our doctor's going to be out of town. We knew she was going to be out of town for a period of time. Yeah, just from when you're just the week, the 38. She's only out of town when you're 38 weeks. Yeah. So the baby comes before then we're good after then we're good. But in that time zone, in that timeline when she's gone, what, what are you thinking about that? It would be okay. I'm, I'm, I keep saying I'm like trauma bonded to this doctor because she delivered our daughter. And I just like had this like vision of just like this redemptive birth with her because she was amazing. And I feel like a lot of people that have gone through situations like this, like where you've gone through a loss with the doctor, have like polarizing experiences where it's like I never want to see you again. I'm associating you with this horrible time or it's like I really just want like I feel like you were like pivotal in such a dark time like I want to now have like a redemptive experience with her like I trust her so much through going through that experience. So it's like I really would love for her to be the one delivering our baby. But I'm also like it's just out of our hands like if the baby decides to come then which it's like he very likely could come when she's back or even even potentially before she leaves. It's not a huge deal. But the rest of our are like OB team is fully on board with like RV back given every other detail that we've given them the baby still measuring like right at 56% tile. So that's great. So yesterday he was six pounds and 15 ounces which is very normal. So he'll probably be our doctors like we're expecting like seven seven and a half pounds. She said eight at the most. I was like no let's say seven and a half. I wasn't expecting for her to say that her baby was just shy of seven pounds. Really? That was pretty shocking to me. I thought the baby was in a way like five pounds and something ounces. You thought we're gonna have a five pound baby? I don't know like I thought since we still have potentially like two you know two three weeks like I thought oh we're yeah we're at like five because I thought they grow by like again it's been so long but I thought it was gonna be like a you know two pound growth in the last like two weeks. And I feel like I'm gaining like two pounds every week. No you're not. No you're not. But no I don't think she's like I'm not expecting like right over. Yeah. I think he's just gonna be perfectly average and that will be great and he feels a lot smaller than our other babies like in my belly like he does. And the fluid looks good. The thing that was a little weird was that my blood pressure was high and that's never been the case and I know that's something they take really really seriously at the end of pregnancy. Like your blood pressure is like something that is like they will take a baby out really quick. I think your blood pressure is high because it's related to pre-clampsia which is pretty serious which I've never had before. But it was high when she took it and then they're like okay well we need to check again before you leave and then we left we didn't even check again like no one remembered and so then I called back to the clinic and I like talked to my doctor and she was like well if you have a cup at home just take your blood pressure and if it's normal it's then we're fine we'll see what your next appointment. If it's high then you need to come back in and also do some blood work and we just did it with our at-home cup and it was normal and I don't have any other like major symptoms of like I think the symptoms are like a really bad headache. Vision changes, things like that and I didn't have those. So hopefully everything's fine with that. That's the thing that really could change our birth plan I guess is if it for some reason ends up getting high. But that was weird maybe she just took it really she did take it really fast but it's never been high before so that was weird and it wasn't like a little bit high it was like really high. How did it feel to have the membrane sweep yesterday? You know what they've never like I feel like if they're gonna work they're probably more painful. Yeah because you didn't really react to I thought you were gonna be in a lot of pain so I came up next to you to hold your hand and you didn't even like really flinch. I mean I've done it before and I just knew what to expect because I've heard a lot of women have severe pain when that happens. I think it probably just depends all on like your baby's position. Yeah. Like he's still kind of high. He was at a negative two station so maybe that made it less painful. I mean I don't know. Also I feel like I'm having a contract right now. I feel like literally right now. I'm not real. But yeah I feel like they can it's like they're gonna hurt really bad if it's gonna send you into labor or they like don't hurt that bad if it's not the real thing or maybe it's because it was already dilated to like a three-and-a-half that didn't hurt us. I don't know. - You don't have to really do much, it's already open. - Yeah, I'm still shocked, I'm just amazed at the human body and the fact that, like, the fact that she could actually feel our baby and just how casually she was like, all right, membranes we've done, I can feel your baby, you're at three and a half centimeters dilated, like, okay, first of all, how do they know three and a half centimeters? - That's still amazing. - They're just like, they just know off of feel. - I know, that does amazing. - How do you know a measurement just based off of with your hand? - They're amazing, I don't know. - There's no device of these. - One of my friends is a labor and delivery nurse and I'm like, how do you know? She's like, you just do it a lot. - You just do it a lot. But then, like, what's your baseline? Do they have, like, do they practice membranes? - They stretch, like that. - But like, see if, like, I'm going in dark and I'm like, feeling around my finger, like, I would have no idea, like, am I at five centimeters of my two centimeters? Like, I guess they just practice a lot on a doll, I don't know. - They probably have, like-- - Is there a membrane sweep doll in their training program? - Not sweet, but, like, to check dilation, I'm sure they have some type of model. - Like a mannequin? - Yeah. - Sorry, all right, class. Take out your notebooks. We're gonna be doing membrane sweeps. Who's up first? Like, is it like that? - Yeah, 'cause it is only a centimeter. Like, that is so impressive. - I'm still forward. - I've seen those mannequins where they're, like, delivering babies. I would have thought there would be some sort of, like, AI measurement tool that then you have to, like, put on your fingers and then, and then it has, like, a magnet so that it can, like, tell the distance between your fingers or something. Like, the fact that they just-- - Matt, babies have been born since the beginning of time. - Obviously, yeah, of course. - AI. - But, like, we live in a world where there's driverless vehicles now. So I thought that there might be some more advanced technology for the measurements, there's not. - Apparently, there's not. Maybe there is, and everyone's just still using their fingers and saying, "Oh, three and a half, all right, we're good." You know? - Yeah, also, none of that stuff, I don't know what this says about me or my body. None of that stuff has ever bothered me that much. Like, people are like, "I don't wanna get a cervical check because it hurts." Like, that has never bothered me. I don't know if it's the location of my cervix. I don't know if it's, I literally don't, I can't tell you what it is. It's just never really bothered me. - Yeah. And getting a membrane sweep has never really bothered me either. So I don't know. Like, it doesn't feel good. - I do think you have a higher pain tolerance than other people though. - Stand up and I'm like, based off of what? - I think you do. I've seen you do some crazy stuff. - Anyway, so yeah, I got the membrane sweep and then just felt like, you know, the typical crampy, the typical, and then my contractions are basically only at night. - Yeah. - So that's great. - Yeah, and also, you know, we had what could have been our last date night since before we had this baby. And we went to Dentai Fung, which was really good actually. I thought I was not gonna like it, but I didn't like it. - Yeah, I was, you were saying it wasn't me good. I was like, it was so good. Matt didn't like that you have at Dentai Fung that you like order on a card. - I don't like that. - Why? - I like to just tell the person what I want. - Well, I think the reason is that way is 'cause it's family style. - Yeah, it confuses me though. I'm like, I feel like I'm doing homework like marking down answers on the Facebook. - You don't like family style. - Yeah. Has anybody been to a restaurant like that where you order on a piece of paper? You know, it's, I think a lot of certain Asian restaurants have that. - Yeah. - Like sushi rolls. We've been to like a sushi place. - You were not kind of what Dentai Fung is. It's elevated Asian takeout. - Are you serious? That's what it is? - How do you think? - I'm just saying that, I don't know. Because we went to that place, is it called like a subway thing where they, like. - That was horrible. - What's it called where they bring the rolls out on the big-- - The conveyor belt sushi. - Yeah, the conveyor belt. - Awful. - No, but I thought it was fun. I like that. - It was a really fun concept. - Yeah. - And it would have been amazing if it was actually good sushi. It was just disgusting sushi. - Well, Dentai Fung was really good. - That was called Listeria, sushi. - I, I, I, I thought the food was gonna be bad 'cause I ate your leftovers when you went to Dentai Fung. - You ate it cold the next day. That's not fair. - And I didn't use any of the, any of the-- - Chili oil, the ginger, the soy sauce, the vinegar. - None of that. I didn't use any of that. - Messed up, you need all the fixings. - So this time, I really covered everything in the good stuff and boy was, was I impressed. - So good. I want it back now. - Especially the mango shaved ice, whoo, that was good. - That was so good. - Yeah, really good dessert. - I ate those spicy noodles. You know, they say spicy stuff can put you into the labor. Didn't do it. - Didn't do it. - Didn't do it. - But maybe your, maybe your body is not ready. - It's just not ready yet. - It's just not ready. - Yeah. - It's just practicing a lot, which is really great for me. - I just practice it. - I know, I actually don't like that it's doing that because, you know, the risk of a V-back is, uterine rupture, and I'm like, my uter-- I need my uterus to rest. - Yeah. - Rest, so you can handle this. It's gonna be a lot for you. Okay, you have an incision in there. - Thank you to Cash Hat for sponsoring this portion of today's episode. - A money lesson we're trying to pass on to our kids is to spend less than they might make. - I just feel like, in this day and age, it's getting harder and harder though. There's a lot of what I call money traps, where you only have to pay for a little now, pay for the rest then. - But they're gonna get you. - So much credit things going on. And so it's really important that we start teaching our kids young how to manage their finances. And that's why I'm really excited about what Cash Hat is building. It's a great resource for kids and parents, because the fact is that kids today are growing up in a world where money is mostly digital. The key is giving them the right setup from the start, one they'll never outgrow. - Cash Apps managed accounts for kids ages six to 12 are designed exactly for that. Your kid gets a customizable Cash Hat Visa card that feels personal to them while you shape the entire experience from your side. You manage everything from your own Cash App, all with no subscription fees because building money habits shouldn't cost extra. - Here's what makes it different. 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Download Cash App into the referral code in your profile send $5 to a friend within 14 days and you will receive $10 in terms of apply. - Cash App is a financial services platform, not a bank. Banking service is provided by Cash Apps, bank partners, pre-paid debit card issued by Sutton Bank, member of FIC. Cash App Visa debit flex cards issued by Sutton Bank, member of FIC and the bank group bank NA. Pursuant to a license from Visa USA, AIC. C terms and conditions for the Sutton pre-paid card, Sutton debit flex card and bank group debit flex card. Savings and offers provided by Cash App, a block ink brand. Parents and legal guardians can open a managed account for kids six to 12. Visit cash.app/legal/podcast for full disclosures. - What are you doing to battle this Arizona heat that we're having right now? It's been so hot. - It's been-- - This has been making me so grouchy. - Awful, it's like looking at my phone today, while I was outside, I was like, "Why am I so hot?" I'm like, "Oh, it's 107. That's why I'm hot. That's why I'm sweating through my shirt." - It's cruel. - Yeah. - It's unusual. - What are you doing to get over that? - I get really grouchy. It's so hot. - Especially with kids too, 'cause you know, you don't wanna put your kid into a hot car. - I know. It is really scary. - Yeah. - The cars get so hot are like, our car will say what the internal temperature is. I don't know how accurate it is, but usually it's like 163. - I keep telling myself I'm gonna do this. - It's like, you can literally, this is an oven. - I've really wanted to either fry eggs or bake cookies inside our car. - Yeah. - Because I've heard the people have done that, and I know that we could-- - But do you think about it? - What? - Inside our car, not inside. That would have-- - Oh yeah, like on the dash. Like, if I look at our Tesla, our Tesla-- - It says 160, you know what cookies are baked at? - If I don't have temperature control on inside the Tesla, it'll get like to 160 degrees. - I just said that. - Yeah, I know, but that's still really hot. - Not enough to bake a cookie. - I think it could technically bake it. Not like, well, it's not gonna be perfectly done. - Do you know what temperature ovens are when you bake a cookie? - Like 350. - Okay, yeah. - That's, yeah, I'm not an idiot. - I need a cookie right now. - Okay, babe, we've got a dog now. How do you think we're gonna introduce this dog to our baby? - I mean, I already told certain friends that are like dog people. I'm like, when you come over, postpartum, just like make sure you show pretzel, extra love and like play with her. - Yeah. - Because obviously she's probably gonna feel like a little less attention. But I'm also really glad that we have her for our toddlers. Like, they're gonna have a lot of fun still with her or they play with her all the time. - I like how they've incorporated her into their play. - Literally today, they're playing a game with her and they're like, no pretzel, that's not how we play it. Like, I think that she knows it was. - What was the game? - It was with, he was stacking water bottles and she kept knocking them down. It was just dumb. - I think it's funny that oftentimes I'll be a monster and chase them and then sometimes pretzel will get to be the monster. But I don't think pretzel really knows that she's the monster, but she is. - She's. - So that's hilarious. - I think we'll probably just like when, I mean, a lot of our, we have nieces and nephews. and then also a lot of friends with babies that come over to our house. - Yeah. - Like sometimes just like let her get a sniff in and then we have to really pull her back because she's a puppy still. She's very eager and excited. - The tricky thing is teaching her how to appropriately swim in a pool because she's such a great swimmer. She loves the water, but when our kids are in the water, she's like scratched me before when she's swimming. - She's doggy paddling. - And so like I've told them to like keep your distance and pretzel, don't get in her line of fire. - She used to be a solo swimmer. - But yeah, it's tricky to navigate the whole swimming with a dog thing because she just kind of scratches ya, you know? - Good thing we're not putting our baby in the pool for a while. - Yeah, the baby's not going in the pool. - Actually, you know what? - What? - He probably could because it's so warm. - You're right. - But there's a lot of chemicals for their little skin for a little bit. We'll have to just look what's recommended, but it's the great temperature for a baby right now. - Yeah, probably not right away, but yeah, I mean, the water is probably about the same temperature as my womb. - Yeah, it's warm. It's warm water for sure. - Did you care actually at our appointment, the lady when she was measuring our amniotic fluid? She was like, they only need like two centimeters. - To breathe. - To breathe through that. I mean, obviously they're getting oxygen also from the umbilical cord, but I was like, that is crazy. There doesn't need to be that much fluid in there. I feel like I don't have that much fluid. Like, I got a lot fluffier, not fluffier, but like more swollen. - Okay. - With my first pregnancy than my second, and then this one, I feel like I'm like less, I'm definitely still swollen, but not like I was the previous one. So I feel like your body just adjust, like it's used to pregnancy more. - I was watching a video from our first, you know, first time around, you were pregnant with Griffin. You look completely different. - I mean, I'm definitely feeling like in these last few weeks, like definitely more so, which I don't care, but-- - It is crazy though, how every single pregnancy is different. - Every single pregnancy is different, yeah. Every single baby is different. Yeah, it's gonna be so interesting to see how, like his little personality type, like in my head, I feel like I already know him. Obviously I'm like, he's really chill, and he's really funny. - Yeah. - Those are like the two things that I'm like, locked in on, like he's a chill and funny dude. But that was actually funny. His, all of his measurements are very consistent with like 56% towel. I think his head was a little smaller, but they also said it's kind of hard for them to measure the head when he's already like, kind of engaged on there, but they could say he has a big belly. And I was like, this belly's like 90th percentile. I was like, that's amazing. - He's getting a lot of nutrients in there. - That's the other thing. I can't be bothered to cook anymore. I don't wanna do it. - I know, we've been getting some good takeout and getting saldened go. That's a local spot near as well. - I haven't had saldened go once. You've just been getting saldened. - I go to saldened go a lot. Where have you been getting your food? - I've been eating a lot of leftovers, but I've been making you grill like every night. - Oh yeah, I mean grilling is easy though. I like grill. - We've got shake-shack one night. - Shake-shack is so good. - We're mooching off of our friends 'cause we have a birthday party like every evening. So I'm like, well, you whatever they have at the birthday party. - That'll be fun. - We're scavengers. - We're just empty. - Okay. - No milk. - Abby. - Nothing. - I like, I just had a realization moment today. I seriously feel like a month ago, I was saying out loud to our family. What'd it be so cool when our kids, CJ and August are like grown up and can play together? Like this is before they're even alive. This is while they're in the womb. Like I just remember verbally saying this and saying to my parents, "Wow, this can be crazy that Caleb's gonna have a kid "and I'm gonna have a kid "that are just like basically the same age." - And now they're best buddies. - And now here we are where they're best buddies and they're both turning three. Like it just, the all the cliches, all the, "Wow, they grow up so fast." Like that's so true. - I know. - And I'm finding myself saying all the same stuff my parents said when I was a kid. You know, okay, when you're a kid and you go to a party like some with family or even friends and you haven't seen people in a year, every single time, what did people say to you as a kid? - What? - Did you just get hit with a contraction? - It's actually really strong. Was it a kick? - No, it's a get traction. - A contraction. (laughing) - And it's just, it's just your uterus. - I don't know how to cry, I'm so over this. - How would you describe it? - Feel it. - Let me feel. - It's hard to know if it looks like it's gonna be rough. - Holy cow. He's just getting it. - Do you, please tell me you actually feel that. - I can feel it. - And this is why I'm so tired. - I'm so, and this is what's hitting you at 1 a.m. when you're trying to sleep. No wonder you have to take unison to knock yourself out. I'm just glad that's pregnancy safe, the unison. There'd be no way for you to sleep with this. - It still wakes me up. - Is it still going on? - This has been a longer one. - How long does it last? How many seconds is that going on? - Still going on. - I feel like this is a long one. Normally they're really short. - Goodness. - And you're just feeling it, is it just pushing, is it just pushing baby down? Like do you just feel the baby going, I don't, I don't, sometimes it feels downward, but more than anything, it just feels like, it's just like closing it on itself. That's why my uterus needs to take a break, because she's susceptible to a rupture. So I'm like, take it easy girl. This isn't real. It's like, literally, it keeps sounding these alarms. Like it's like, it's time to go. Oh, and then people keep saying, now you're not going to know when it's time. It's like, no, I'll know, because then they'll be consistent, and they'll hurt, and they'll be like, a steady amount apart, you know. - Are you nervous for the V-back? - I think I'll be nervous once we go to the hall, like it's actually go time. - Yeah. - I think right now I'm just kinda like, I always say that's the blessing of the end of pregnancy. You're so uncomfortable that labor sounds delightful. - Yeah. - That it sounds like a better option than continuing as you are, you know? - Have you changed your mind on the epidural at all? - What was my mind? - I feel like you were team get the epidural. - Yeah, I'm still teaming up the epidural. - And for a little bit, you were like, maybe I don't want to. - I think I'll probably still wait until the goal is to get it when I'm like six or seven, seven meters dilated. - I did find it hilarious. Ardulla was like, which, you know, I respect this thought process of like, it's natural to not have the epidural and just go in natural, like I respect that, but I did find it funny when our own doula was like, I will say, though, I got the epidural, it was pretty freaking off. - I know. - And I'm like, all right, like, that. - I saw someone today, they're like, this is like, when people ask about my birth plan, this is what, this is what I tell them, and it's like, you know, like, game the Sims, I never played that. But it's like, this was my plan. It's like, she's like, it's like this video game character, we're gonna have to put this on the screen because I'm not gonna describe it well. She's like, pregnant, and then she like turns around, and then she's like, skinny and holding a baby. And it was like, I was like, yeah, that's my plan. I just want to, she's like, this was what it sounds like your birth plan is. I'm like, yeah, I just want to have fun. I want the baby to come. I want it to be redemptive, and I want to have fun. So, let's just let it be that way. I don't know. I think I'm just like, whatever will be, will be Kacer Ross' raw. Right? - What does that mean? - Kacer Ross' raw. - It means whatever will be, will be. The future's not ours to see. - That's the definition of that. - Please tell me you know the song. - How do you sing the song? - Kacer Ross' raw. Whatever will be. - Is this from musical? - You're kidding me, you don't know this song. How do you know this song? I've been singing this before. - I've heard you sing it. I've heard you sing it, or I've heard you say it. I don't know if I've heard you sing it, but I don't know what it's from. - It's just a famous song. - The man who knew too much, have you seen the movie? - No, it's just a famous song. - Did your grandpa teach you this? - My grandpa, how'd you learn this? - I think my mom did. You want to bring her in here? - This episode's gone off the rails. I don't want to do this. I don't want to work. - Yeah. - You get out of here. - Let me out of here. - If you guys didn't know, Abby will be taking a maternity leave. She'll be taking some time off from the podcast. Her friends will be joining her podcast. - We've already filmed enough unplanned. So then. - Yeah, we've had some super cool guests on the show. So very excited for you guys to get to see who those special guests are. But in case someone's like, oh my gosh, how am I gonna get through Wednesday without you guys? You still can. We'll just have some cool guest episodes. - We need to practice right here on the podcast. What are you gonna say when I'm in labor but I don't have the epidural? Or if the epidural doesn't work like it should, like it did the first time. - I'm gonna say your body knows exactly what it needs to do. - Yes, that's a good one. - I'm gonna say that you're with each contraction, you're one step closer to meeting our baby. - That's a good one. - And I'm gonna say you're a badass. I'm gonna say you're. - That's great. I wanna hear that. - I'm gonna say, go, go, go, go. - And then I'll play like rap music. - No, not that, that would piss me off. - Okay. - Rap music would piss me off. I like to listen to like, I like to listen to throwback worship music. - Yeah. - That like, is like, chanty? - Yeah. - Like, give me an example. ♪ You called me out before the wind ♪ - No, that's too slow. That's too slow. No, I need one that's like, My God, it's not dead. It's just a little lie. Yeah, that one. Yeah, that's the kind of thing. I mean, so start playing that. That helped you a lot actually. That's what I was listening. Just put it in my headphones and just let me be like. Throwback Christian. Yeah, you like not just. or about Christian, throwback worship. And then also I just want you to say good job. - Yeah. - I really feel like that's something that really resonates with me. Like, say it right now. Say, no, no, say like you're doing a good job. - You're doing a good job. - No, but say like you mean it. - You know what I, do you know what I- - This is good that we're practicing this because I don't wanna do this when I'm in there. - Yes, okay, so let's review. I'm gonna be saying, and I'm say, hey babe, with every contraction, you're one step closer to meeting your baby. - Mm-hmm. - Not, you're- - No, it's gotta have more of like a- - Brett, you pretend that you're me right now. - Oh, my uterus. Ah! - Mm-hmm, okay. - See, I'm not gonna be talking. - Okay. - And then I'd be like, okay, hey, you're doing a really good job, good job. You're so strong. I'm proud of you. That's what I want to hear. I want you to be like, good job. Like a coach. - Okay, I'm writing this down right now. - So we've got- - Like when I'm done with a contraction, I wanna hear a good job like a football coach. - Things to say to Abby while she's giving birth. - You could even throw in there like a good job, good job. I was gonna say buddy, but that just doesn't feel right. - Okay, okay. Wait, yeah, why buddy, why would you want that? - I feel like if you were to say breathe, that would really piss me off for some reason. - Why would me saying breathe piss you off? - Because I'm like, well, duh, I have to breathe. - Okay, so don't say anything stupid. - I don't say that. - Like don't say anything that's just like obvious. - Yeah. - But then like why is saying good job? Like why is that so obvious though? - Like you're doing such a good job. Saying you're doing such a good job that would make you feel really good. - You're doing such a good job. - Yeah. And also just so you know all this is susceptible to change. - You could completely decide in the moment. Like shut up. - Maybe I want silence. - I don't wanna hear any of that. I actually did see that. - That's how I feel about touching. - Like touching is sometimes good and touching is sometimes really bad with your pain. - I think I honestly just think I was like nervous 'cause there was so much blood and I had never seen you in so much pain before that I was going, you're so strong, you're so brave, you're so strong, you're so-- - I think I like that. - And I thought I sounded annoying and everybody in the comments on our first vlog which was like-- - You know what, those people have not experienced super pubic pressure. - They have it, but they were all like wow, my husband was saying that it pissed me off. - No, I like that because you couldn't be next to me. They pushed you to the side and then they were jumping on my belly. - Thank you to Lisa for sponsoring this portion of today's episode. We recently gifted my parents a new mattress. I was hearing that my parents were having difficulty sleeping. There's just nothing quite more important than a good night's rest to properly set you up for the day ahead. Lisa mattresses do just that. They have a lineup of beautifully crafted mattresses tailored to how you specifically sleep. Each mattress is designed with specific sleep positions and feel preferences in mind. From night one, you'll feel the difference. Premium material is that delivers serious comfort and full body support, no matter how you sleep. Just take the Lisa's sleep quiz and you'll find your perfect match in two minutes or less. Something else I really appreciate about Lisa is that the experience is super user friendly. It arrived rather doorstep, there's literally no setup. You just open it up, the mattress grows, and it's perfectly comfortable ready to go, not a huge hassle like some deliveries can be. - Go to Lisa.com for 25% off select mattresses. Plus get an extra $50 off with promo code unplanned. Exclusive for our listeners. That's leesa.com promo code unplanned for 25% off select mattresses. Plus an extra $50 off. And when you use our code, you're supporting our show. Lisa.com promo code unplanned. It is funny though how like what for one person could be really encouraging words for another person could be like. - I know a lot of women like rap music and like during when they're in labor, I didn't want that. - That's not you, I don't know. ♪ Oh God, there's an awesome guy here ♪ - Like what about like Justin Bieber? - I don't think that's me. - Yeah, not you. - No, not me. Also this was when it was like getting intense. - Or I could pretend. - And then I wanted hypno-burling in my ears. - Yeah, 'cause then you listen to the hypno-birth, and she's like, with every breath, you're one step closer. - See, it's crazy that you're saying that because in my head, she wasn't talking. What? - She was like. - I was not shittin' at least. - She was like, mama. Just breathe and know that with every contraction, you're one step closer to meeting your baby. - See, like that right there is doing something right now. - Your body, you speak these words, let them overwhelm your body. - So right now you're actually transporting me. - Your body knows exactly what it is to do. - That's what I'm saying. I think that's good. - It's such a calming voice. - Put that on too. - Would that piss you off of while I try to do that calming voice? - I don't believe you doing that. - Okay. - That's for her. - We'll put on the hypno-birth lady. - So we have three skills right now that you know. - Okay. - And then here's what I want you to do as far as physical touch. I want you to do that magical thing that the doula taught you with my hips. - Yes, yes, the squeeze. - Yes. - Where I relieve the pressure on the bed. - But also when it's not that intense, but it's like early labor, I swear you put my hair. That feels so good. - Okay. - And then, yeah, that's probably it. Maybe in between contractions, maybe the drink of water, some ice. We already lost the frickin' birth coms that the lady gave us. So she said she was gonna bring some to the hospital with us. - Dang it, how did we lose those? Honestly, I blame our kids. I don't think we lost them. I think they played with them and put them somewhere that we can't find. - They do look fun. - Or it was pretzel. Maybe pretzel ate the birth coms. - Probably. - Pretzel ate your shoe today. - Yeah, our kids can do no wrong. That dog can do some wrong. - That dog has ruined. You know what I saw? I didn't tell you this. I caught our dog chewing up our rug again last night. After I took a shower. - I caught her on the frickin' dining table like a Billy goat. Did you know that? - Yeah. - Twice. - Two times. - Standing there, just like. - Was she eating food off the table? - There was no food on the table. - She was on the dining table. - Yeah. - Why? - She's the Billy goat. - Was there a toy up there? Was there something that she wanted? - She said anything but a dog. She said goat, she's an otter. - She's a Billy goat, she's an otter. - She's a hound. - She's a hound. Yeah, that is hilarious. - Wait, so do you feel prepared now for labor? Like do you feel like you know what I need? Do you know what I want? - I think I do. - Don't ever touch my belly, that's a thing. - Don't touch your belly. Okay, wait, why not? - 'Cause I don't even like it when you just felt that contraction your hand lingered for too long. Because my skin is stretched so tight that it's just like you might actually rupture it. - Goodness, okay. I've got that written down. - You're not actually gonna do that, but. - I'll do whatever you want me to do. - Don't ever touch my belly. - Here's the thing, I actually feel like I do need to say this. - Yes. - And this might need to get cut. But I just need you to know this while it's on my mind. - Okay, go for it. - I know that when I'm in that gown, I'm not gonna have a bra on or underwear on and I know that you're gonna know that and I know that you can absolutely. - Oh my gosh. Abby, you really think I'm being panty? - I think you might. I think you might. - You're being panty while you're giving birth. - I don't trust you with my birth. - You see, guy, I am. - With your. - And here's the thing that actually made me so mad that I think about a lot at the hospital. They didn't let me wear a sports bra. And I wanted to, because I knew that they were gonna leak. - Okay. - Because whenever my boobs were free, they just decide to just like, I don't know, release something, especially in labor. - Okay. - And they were like, no, you can't. They told me that. I couldn't wear a bra. - Crazy. - And I was like, please. And so then when Griffin's born and all those pictures, my boobs are just like wet circles. And I just felt, I don't like that touch of my nipple on the gown. And I had it. And so I just need you to know that. - Yeah, of course. - There's no touching the belly. - No touchy. - The boobs. - Certainly, you're not gonna want to touch down there. - Only the hips. - Only the hips, yes, that's right. - And only touching her baby to the lip or the baby. - My hair, remember, you're just like doing that. - And play with you, I'm writing that down. I've got to do not list. - No touch, anything else. - Do not touch Abby's belly. - Do boobs, or what was the other thing? - Butt. - Butt, no touching your butt. But if I'm touching your hips, though, that's basically your butt. - No. - I'm literally touching your butt when I'm doing the hips. - Yeah, and when you, yeah, that's the problem. Is sometimes at night when you're doing that to relieve pressure, your hands drift. And that's not what it's about. It's not even a little bit. - Okay, so I do not touch belly boobs, but do touch hips and hair. - Hips hair. - You can actually even scratch my back. That sounds fine too. - Back scratches are welcome. - Yeah. - What else? - And just remember what to say to me. And what to play. With every contraction, you're one step closer to me than your baby. - Yes, you're such a good job. I like that, I like that. Say you're so tough, you can say that. I liked it earlier when you said you're a bad ass. I think that would be good. - You're a bad ass, I'm putting that in all caps. - And then, if I, here's a good way to tell Matt. - A bad ass. - If I look at you like. - But no touching your ass, just saying that you're a bad. - What? - Don't confuse that. - Yeah. - No, if I look at you like this, then that's like snuck it off. - Knock it off. - And it's not even like not, and don't even make a joke about knocking it off. Just like instantly change your behavior. - Okay. - And then if I look at you and I kind of just give you one of these, like a little bit, that means that was okay. But it doesn't mean do it again. - Yeah. - 'Cause sometimes if I smile at you, you get really excited, just do it over and over and over. But you could bring it up again later. - Wait, what am I allowed to bring up again later? - If I smile at you and you like crack a joke, but if it's a joke that's, and I don't wanna hear that right now, then I'm just gonna give you this. - Got it. - Or I'm not gonna look at you at all. - Okay, okay. - Okay. - This is good, I feel like I'm glad we hashed this out because I just don't wanna harbor resentment in those times. - I agree. - Oh, and don't get on your phone. - No being on the phone. - And if you get food, don't bring it around me. - Don't bring the food, no food around you. - And don't take a nap, unless given permission. - This is really good, like no, I'm glad I have, I feel like this is like the blue bridge. - He likes to explicit, explicit instructions. - It's so helpful. - So this is good. - I'm glad we're in this. - I'm glad we're doing this. And I think that, oh, I do really want you to hold the baby. Like, I want you to do skin to skin while I get such as, I don't want to hold the baby while I get such as, I want you to hold the baby. - Okay, I've got all this, do hold the baby. - They were trying to have me hold the baby while I was getting stitches and I was like, excuse me. - I'm hopeful this time that you won't tear and that you won't need to get stitches. You think you're gonna tear? - Yeah. - Why do you think you'll tear? - Because have you seen what the size of a baby's head? - Is, yeah, that's true. - Have you seen the nature of where that's coming out of? - Maybe, you know, I don't know. - No, you know what people do is they do those massages. - To help, they like try to stretch the area. - Okay, and I'm like, I actually am opting out of that. - Up to 85% percent of women's hair. - 85% percent of women's hair. - Here's this blowing my mind, okay? Like, 80, okay, 85% of 90% whatever, tear. - And guess what, that's not the worst part. - What did ladies do hundreds of years ago? Like, they got stitches. - But like, you're telling me that people knew it as stitch people up about 500 years ago? - Think about war. - I guess you're right, but I guess people just die. Like, think about all the infection that could have happened. - Yeah. - It's like tear to your butt and then that, it's all mixed up in there. - Seriously. - That's awful. - That's why I know that women are tougher. - I do think you probably, yeah, I would say you have a harder than me. Like giving birth is pretty pretty pretty pretty-- - No, but it's like I'm excited to do it. Like, I'm pumped, I'm amped. - Yeah. - Like, I wanna do it. - Yeah. - I wanna do it. Like, I'm like stoked. For me, like, when we were talking with our duo about like, what is, like, birth to you? Matt said trauma. I said game day. - Game day. - And so I'm like, it's like put me in. 'Cause I feel like, it's true. Like, our bodies are uniquely created to do this. It's not like it's not supposed to happen. And yeah, I mean, I just hope that it would be really cool if it was just a first degree tear this time. That'd be great. - Yeah, and it sucked that, when you got your stitches, they had to be done and you had to get 'em done twice. So that's not happening. - That's not happening. - That's not happening this time. - No, one time is enough. - Yeah, we don't need that. - Yeah, but you know what? I didn't have a ton. My recovery from that really wasn't bad either. So I feel like this is better that you know what to do. - Uh-huh. - The other expectation is that, whenever the baby cries, you're bringing the baby to me and I'm not getting out of bed to get the baby. And I feel like you know that one anyway. You already knew that. Oh, don't let them give the baby formula. - Oh, yeah, do not give baby formula. We're not doing that. - We're not doing that. Only if it's like, we end up, I feel like I could just pump it out and we actually already have stuff. - If a nurse tries to give our baby formula, I'm like, walk up to, I'm gonna smack it out of their hand. Get down out of here. I'm gonna do that. And I'm gonna yell that too. - I think that would be good. - Just to intimidate them, you know? - Yeah, I think that would be good. - Yeah. - We'll just, I'll just ask questions. - And she's gonna be like, we'll just supplementing the breast, you know what I'm gonna say? - No, if she's like, hey, their blood sugars are dropping. And it's like, hey, you know what? My wife has prepared something for this exact occasion. With her own breast, she has made colostrum for this exact occasion. So that's good. The things that I-- - You really think I'm gonna say that to a nurse. My wife-- - It's your baby. - With her own breasts has prepared colostrum for this very moment. So you don't need to be bringing any formula up in here. You want me to say that? - You can just say, we actually have prepared colostrum that we can do in this case. - Okay, sounds good. I can say that. - Okay, yeah. - The lactation consultant tries to grow me. What do you say? - Oh, God, pull that. Well, 'cause when the last time we worked with the lactation consultant, our baby kicked you in the-- - In the C-section incision. - In the C-section incision. - Yep, that wasn't good. I almost yeeted our baby off of the hospital bed because of such things. It felt like a hot knife entering my abdomen. - Are you gonna let-- If we ever have a lactation consultant come in, are you gonna let them see that you're using in a nipple shield or not? - I think this time I'm gonna be my own lactation consultant. - Yeah. - It's a third journey, I feel like if anything, I would let them tell me what full-enge size was like my perfect size. - Okay. - 'Cause that little template that we use the other day didn't feel the most accurate. That was dehumanizing, I did not like, I didn't like that you saw it. I actually felt embarrassed. - Really? - Yeah. - Putting your nipple up to the different flavors. - In it, it was gross. - It was gross. You just finding something that fits your body. - I almost came to eye contact with you right now. I'm a little embarrassed right now. - Why? - I don't think it's gross. I think it's cool. - And like those girls are like 15 millimeter. I'm like, you're so cute. (laughing) - I need the biggest size. (laughing) - Anyway, thank you to Chili Pad for sponsoring this portion of the day's episode. Boy, is it hot and Arizona? - It is so hot. - Oh my gosh. - It's so hot. - I don't know how anyone's doing it without a chili pad. If I'm totally honest. - Now that we've switched to the chili pad, it's like, I don't know how we can go back. It's so nice getting into a cooled bed. And it's just, and you wake up in the morning, you got the warm blanket sauna. - Oh. - The bed is cold again right now. - I wanna get in right now. That's why we have to tell you about the Chili Pad 2.0 by Sleep Me, the most advanced version of the bed cooling system built specifically for people who are tired of waking up hot and sweaty. The Chili Pad 2.0 actively cools or warms your bed using water. It's basically a thermostat for your bed and water is key here. Fans in general move high air around. Doesn't really do much for you. But the chili pad uses actively chilled water to cool the bed, actually pulling heat away from your body and it works with your existing mattress. So no new bed needed. - You guys should definitely check it out. We even have a discount for you. Visit www.sleep.me/unplanned to get up to $250 to $5 off your Chili Pad 2.0 with code unplanned. This special offer is available for the unplanned podcast listeners and only for limited time. Order today with free shipping and try it out for 30 days. You can return it for free if you don't like it with their sleep trial. That's so convenient. Visit www.sleepsleep.me/unplanned and never wake up hot and tired again. - Everybody submitted some questions on my Instagram. We end the unplanned podcast Instagram. So if you're not following all of us on Instagram, what are you doing? Get with the program. - So our first question, this one comes from Brianna. Says, "Is Abby taking time off from both podcasts?" Actually, I already answered this. Yes, she is. She'll be taking a short or long, whatever you really want, honestly. - I'm taking two weeks off. - Which Abby's taking two weeks off and we'll be having guest episodes on unplanned and then on Always Here, we'll have-- - Guys episodes that I'm in, that I've just already filmed. - They're a pre-film. And then on Always Here, are there any pre-filmed episodes? - Yeah, there's pre-filmed and then there's one week that my friends are gonna step in. - Okay, so there you go. - Let's also say, we've offered her more than two weeks. - They've offered me more than two weeks. - Yes, Abby's just, she's a workhorse, she's amazing. - Well, it just messes everything up. - Yeah, and you're popular lady. You're very, you know, people like being around you. - Don't wanna. - I don't wanna create more work for myself now and I also don't wanna create more work for other people. - Yeah, I always say no. - There's that. - This is from Kylie, she said, for Abby, any advice or hacks for being pregnant with other toddlers running around. What are you doing to help? - Shows. - Turn on, turn on Disney last week. - I mean, that's, I gotta be so real because I feel like that is something that I actively feel guilty about at this stage. But I'm also like. - I think, you know, we've kind of hit that point where our kids have grown up a lot. They, you know, they get a ton of playtime in the day. - They do play a lot. - But there's periods of time where like, you just have to get stuff done around the house. You have work that needs to be done. You're a working mom. - It's also for safety because they will, they're the type of kids that will get into something. - Like we like to have some time where they're, you know, if we're in the kitchen, cooking dinner, and they're playing in the backyard. Okay, if somebody gets hurt, we're gonna hear them go, oh, and then we'll run back and go check on them to make sure they're okay. - Yeah. - But it's like we can't just leave our kids unattended while we're filming a podcast or like doing some long extended period of work together. So, you know, having a movie on is-- - Well, they do a lot of activities too. But yeah, we've, they've had more show, they've had more screen time than usual for sure. - Oh yeah, but I think that's, but we're kind of entering this transition where they're gonna be in school. So we're weeks away from them, literally being in school multiple days in the week. - For three hours. - Okay. - But I, my other, my real advice too, which has been my advice before I was pregnant, but this is especially helpful when I am pregnant is taking them out of the house. It's way better to get out of the house, even though it feels daunting. - Yeah. - And to let them play with other kids. So then you're not the one that's like constantly, like feeling like you have to be their play buddy. Like we go to a lot of, since it's so hot in Arizona right now, we go to a lot of play gyms and they like play with a ton of other kids, they run around, they get so sweaty and have so much fun. And so then it's, but it's not me. Like I'm literally, I'm surely plopped my booty in a chair. Like while they're playing, and that's like, that's honestly my best advice. And also to just accept help if you need it. If you can, like if there's people offering, like to hang out with your kids, or to even just scheduling a play day, it offloads you once again being the play buddy. - Yeah. - And I do feel guilty about that, 'cause I'm like, I mean, I feel like I have not, not been as good about playing with my kids, but I do know that this is a short season. - Totally, and you spend so much time with them. - Yeah. - So, I don't know, them playing with other kids is also great for their development too. - Oh, also reading books with them. That's something that they really like and I can do seated, surely. And I love reading books to them. - This is from Caitlin. She said, "What is the hardest part about having kids? Probably just a transition." I would say into it, I think your time isn't your own. That's probably, I would say that's the hardest part, is like your-- - Your time is not your own anymore. - Yeah, bingo. You just have to adapt to thinking about feeding them - Like they're schedule. - You know, yeah, everything is kind of around - Their needs come first before years. And like, it's crazy how that goes into every area of your life, like even like where, like what we eat is also kind of determined by them. Like things like that. But also I think it's probably the one of the greatest things that you can, like, as a human experience and in this act of like selflessness. - Yeah, yeah. I think-- - And I just, there's so much deep purpose in having kids. - This is from Stacey. She said, "Do your kids favor one parent and want them for everything? How do you handle it?" - I feel like, for us, not the most-- - I feel like it's 'cause we're so 50/50. Like, it's not like you're gone for the work day and I'm home with them all day. Like we both handle work in home, 50/50. So I feel like they really don't have a preference. I mean, they definitely prefer me for more like, if they're hurt or sick or sad. And they go to you more for like play and just anything exciting. - They go from me whenever they need-- - Like for fun. - Whenever they need a bad guy to chase 'em around or a lightsaber, dual buddy, that's me. I'm always, I'm always a bedtime guy, sorry. - You're so good at it. - Anytime I'm traveling or-- - Yeah, your bedtime stories could use a little-- - What's wrong with my bedtime stories? - They're not PC. - There's a lot of fart. - Yeah. - A lot of poop jokes in my bedtime stories. But that makes them laugh. - Yeah, but do you understand like, our kids are going around saying poop and two and all this stuff and like other kids' parents are like, we don't say that like-- - How often does that happen? - Not to our kids, but they're correcting their own kids for those things that-- - What's wrong-- - Telling them in their bedtime stories. - What's wrong with that? - I don't have a problem with it either, honestly, but sometimes-- - Why do we do it? - They think it's hilarious. - Sometimes I'm like, maybe they don't need to just go up to another random kid and poopy-tooty, but-- - I see you think it's too funny and that's crazy. - Because I can just see the other kids' parent be like, that's an appropriate-- - No, no, this is what I hear a lot. They're like, hey, we don't do potty talk. And I'm like, fair, that's fair. Why are we okay with potty talk? - I think that's so dumb. - I guess that's just not a battle that we wanted to pick. - Yeah, I think I like to have fun. - And you kind of encourage us. - I don't know, I think it's fun to see your kids laugh and crack jokes with them. So I don't think it's a hell I'm going to die on as our kids say. - No, you're like actually encouraging it though, which is another step further when you really think about it. - What would your thoughts be on having-- - This is from Drought Dog. They said, what would your thoughts be on having twins? I'm curious as I'm going to twin myself. You know, that would be crazy, but I'm sure we would figure it out, you know? - Yeah, I feel like twins sound really fun when you're pregnant for the first time. (laughing) And then, any pregnancy after that, you're like, what a blessing. And you're like so scared. I feel like, I feel like twin parents probably hear the most naive comments. - Oh yeah. - Well, they're like, we had 'em close in age, so it's like we had twins, and they're like, but you never had two newborns at the exact same, you never had to nurse two babies at the exact, or it's like, well, that's so nice that you not kill two birds with one stone. God, I'm out, it's like, no, they literally were pregnant with two full babies at one time. Like that, just, I just have so much respect for them. That's all I have to say. - What's a parenting, this is from authentically angel. She said, what's a parenting hack that used to work for you? That doesn't work anymore. - Everything. (laughing) The red light green light, they're hatch. - Oh, yeah, yeah. - Yeah, we used to, so like-- - We still try so hard. - We have their night light be red when they have to stay in the room and green when they can come out, but they just kind of, don't really abide by that rule. They kind of just do their thing. - It's 'cause they don't go in their pull-ups anymore. - Oh yeah, they like to go on the potty. - Yeah, what are we gonna say? Like, don't go to the bathroom. - That is a tricky thing, 'cause our kids, they found a loophole in our whole system, 'cause it's like, stay in your room to the light screen, and we have a program to like, you know, go off at a certain time. - 6.45, it's not that much to ask for. - I know, but then here's the thing. - Every time it's just out. - We always catch them outside of the room, but they're like, oh, I'm going potty, and they actually do go potty. - You do every time they can always make some come out. - Yeah, they just, so I don't know. Half the time, I feel like they actually do need to go potty. The other half, I think they're just effing with us, and so, at this point, we just kind of are like-- - They're like effing with us, we're like fine, I guess the light will stop. - Go pee, okay, whatever, like it's good that you're learning to not pee in your pull-up and you're peeing in the potty, so. - Yeah, rip that parenting hack. (laughing) - Pairing hack. - Yeah, so that's where we're at, people. So many exciting things coming up for us. Seriously, like, can't believe that we're coming up on 200 episodes of this podcast. - I'm so excited to see you hold a baby shirtless again. - Really? - It's so sweet. - You're into that, you think I'm-- - Yeah. - I look it with my shirt off. - With a baby, it's a perfect combination. - Really, just baby with-- - Hold on, it's like, yeah, I'm gonna say, yeah. - Okay. - It's really, I like it. - I'm also looking forward to seeing you shirtless with a baby as well. - Okay, that's animal planet, that's not-- Oh, that is another role. - Oh, wait, wait, we gotta talk about this. - You cannot touch me when I'm breastfeeding and I swear to get it if you try. - Why, what's happened before? - I hate it, I hate being touched when I'm breastfeeding. - What did I do? - So many important things. - Like what, I tell me, what did I do? - I just comment on, just don't even look at me when I'm breastfeeding, how about that? - Don't even look at you. - Maybe don't. - Why not? - Especially if I have a hug on. - Where am I supposed to look? - Oh way. - At what? - Anything else. - Okay. - Don't touch me and don't look at me when I'm breastfeeding. - All right, that's another thing we need to really lay out. - You brain from ever touching or looking at you ever again. - When I'm breastfeeding. - When you're breastfeeding. - Thank you. - Well, everybody, thank you again for tuning in for another episode of what I planned. If you haven't left us a review or subscribed to the podcast, we'd really appreciate that. Actually, a lot of people listen to this show, but aren't subscribed, and it's free to subscribe. So you can do that really easily. And it's also free to leave a review. It takes like five seconds. So let us know what you think you guys and we'll see you next time. Bye. - Olen Shannon Maldonado. Käsin tehtija artesani tuotteita myuven jaui lahi kaupan perustaja. Valitsin Shopify, koska alustoja testa tessani totesin sen ehdottomasti yhdeksi helpokäyttöisimmistä alustoista. Minulo oli tärkeää pohtia kehittymistä me tulevaisuudessa. Kaikki myyntiin tarvittava työkalut, kuten varaston suunnittelu, ovat kätevästi dashboardissa. Aloita ilmainen kokeilu Shopify piste komsi vustolla.