IT'S A HITCHHIKE PART 3

The following podcast is a dear media production, the following podcast is a dear media production. I'm Benito Skinner. I'm Mary Beth Brown and this is Rye. Rye. Are we recording? We're recording. Ben D.A. can the back god and blow a pupils up. I've actually said crouples before. Like crouples up. So looks like what was that? It has gotten the many drama. Sorry, I just burped. Girl, it didn't start. In episode recently, we were out of home and I said, I farted. Yeah, that was crazy. Did you need the convention? And the guy kind of looked up like, he was like, whoa, some shit for me right now. I know that's not some shit for me right now. Yeah, you're shitty. A fight. No, I just started ending that episode this morning and I was cracking up at Sensei and Adi, but we shouldn't talk too much about what they can't see because they haven't even heard it. I mean, they have heard it now that this is out, but you know what I mean? The timeline gets so crazy. The way we play with time here. We did get a person that said that they were willing to have their head shaved at the next ride live Los Angeles. So I have that screenshot and I'm ready to reach out when we put some dates on the books, which we don't have right now. For the final, the final stop, I'll shave your head at Radio City. Yes. In New York. This is you and it's just going to be a camera. It's very like V for Vendetta. I wanted to appear someone's nipple at ride live, but I was overruled for what it's worth. Down here, down here. Down here. Down here. Down here. Down here. That scene, I think, say what you want about having gay stuff on camera, but I think Lindsey Lohan piercing Lindsey Lohan's ear and parent trap is really fucking hardcore. That was like, I know that people tried that mind blowing. They had to have tried that. That's how I think my mom or my aunt's ears were pierced that way. With Apple on the back. You put some ice on it and then you put an apple on the back. Easy breezy. Oh. Jackson hit it with that button. Our Queen. So I have a show in LA on August 14th and a show in the Hamptons on July 11th. So come a few dare to get to available on my website. I will be at one. Maybe both. Maybe neither. Maybe neither. Anyone guess calendars are crazy. I couldn't even go to Sincianati because of just press for the show. I just want people to watch this show so we can keep making the show. It's kind of all I do. In fact, let's talk about the Goop menu. So goop. Goop kitchen has hit silver lake in a huge way. So it's taken silver lake by storm. Quite literally, the streets are abuzz with goop kitchen. And I was ordering it for me and Mary Beth obviously were huge patrons. And I couldn't help but feel as zest in the copyright. Whoever wrote it, they previously worked at Dollskill doing the website for Dollskill, I believe. And again, everything we say is a joke. It's a joke also to call it copyright is so funny because we're saying copyright as an WRIT. So not the copyright that you'd be thinking of. We're talking about copywriting. We'll be shortening it to copyright. Oh yeah, sorry. You know what I meant. But I can't get over this lake. I'm chinking. No, I can't. All right. We're keeping up. What's funny? We're keeping it. We're fucking it. I just think I'm literally so tired. Oh my god. Staying with you is so fun. I know, right? Just like when you walked in this morning, I know my room smells like morning breath and other stuff. But it's just like come as you aren't. Come as you aren't. No, seriously. I'm like, give me your tired. You're poor. You're huddled masses yearning. You're huddled masses. And bring them to Benny drama's house. I swear to God. We ordered a good kitchen to an Armani event because we had not been fed. Oh my god. It was so I ordered Uber Eats to the event. Imagine your wife. She calls a cart for you. Has a poop kitchen waiting. And you get to eat it with the lights on in the back. Your parents not driving. So no one's yelling at you for the light on in the back. And you get to eat a chicken teriyaki. But here's my thing with the copyright. No, with the copy. They have such a gossip girl, panache. It's very like, I mean, it's just the world's best salad. I mean, what's the big deal, bralette? I mean, it's the cutest little salad to eat in your tiny little top before you get wait, okay, let's see what else I can do. The perfect spring rolls that'll roll you up into the most best perfect summer nights. These would be paired deliciously with a wine. I love how blonde my hair is right now. Should I go darker? These summer veggie rolls that will really make you think, why did he dump me? Girl, you're so much better than him. Oh my god. The only thing better than these cookies is an infrared sauna on a warm summer night. Come on, girl. Don't you want to go to the movies? No, he's also this one where it's like the 16 best green salad. I mean, it's just a perfect green salad. That's really it. I'm like the attitude of whoever wrote this. It's like here, try this, me so glazed salmon. And by the way, we're just throwing in a bar of Sidney Sweeney. So I mean, come on. It's not the craziest idea. I mean, who cares? It's just lunch, right? No big deal. And it's going, it's going, she's going, it's coming. She has eaten none of this. It's really good. It's so good. They have these summer rolls. These summer rolls are so good. It's also really gluten-free. And so I got a rap yesterday that was very rewarding. It looked rewarding. If I had one word to describe it, I'd say rewarding. I get the Sam and Teriyaki miso bowl. It's just amazing. It's portioned out gorgeously. But yeah, I mean, come on. They call things like the perfect rap. I was going to say the perfect amount. But it's different than cafe gratitude. And if you've never been to cafe gratitude, it's like the food on the menu is called like what would be an example of a dish like thankful. The dish is called thankful. And it's a fried mushroom burger. I'm feeling hateful. I want that. And it's a mushroom burger. Yeah, right. Yeah. God, my heart goes out to vegan places. But every time I get vegan food, there's a rumble in my tummy. Here's the thing. It's okay to have vegan food. Don't try to be something you're not. Unfortunately, I have this like, I know you can get protein from other things, but I think my brain just like won't allow for that. So until I have chicken or salmon or something in a salad, I'm like, I'm, I'm so hungry. I need protein. I need carbs and protein. That's my whole deal. And that's why we have a podcast is to talk about stuff like this. Exactly. But all to say, who's ever writing that we'd love to have you on. Oh, please. We'd love for you to write our episode descriptions. I think you could bring something fun to it. The perfect green lemonade that'll scorch your throat. I love the way popsicles taste. Don't you, girl? Toner is a must. You know, it's just like it's all fun. It's asking questions. There's no order to answer. Yeah. I did write airport times on the dock, but I don't remember what thousand reference to. And when I wrote airport times down, I thought to myself, just put one more word there so you know what you were talking about, but I didn't. Yeah. So let's come back to that. But happens to me was writing the show all the time where I read notes back. And I'm like, God, if someone hacked into this and read it, just to be clear, you'd get nothing. Ramblings of a mad man. Well, yeah, it's like when they found all his journals in seven, like none of it makes any sense. No, 2016 makeup. Oh, my God. 2016 makeup. You guys, that's all I'm going to say. Okay. We used to wear beats. Yeah. No, we did. Well, it's funny because that's the only makeup. That's like how I learned how to do makeup because I was making Kardashian videos. So I was like, how do you do makeup? And it was the like 2016 like full carved brow contour cut crease lashes full overline lips. So now sometimes when I'm doing someone's makeup, I have to be like, Oh, it's done. Yeah. Put the brush down. I love when they have the tools that use in geometry and they put them up to eyebrows. What are those things called? You're back in trig. But you know what I'm talking about. It's like pencils. No. Oh, oh, the like, it's a half circle. And it's not a compass, but it's something else. If anybody wants to chime in in the comment section about what geometry was my best math subject because it's, you know, what you want? I got it. New shapes. But it's also very, it makes sense. Like it's, it's linear. Whereas I feel like some math like calculus and stuff. It's like, I can't do all that. When there was letters all of a sudden, I said, aren't I in fucking math? You guys are dumb. No, I agree. I mean, yeah, we talked about proofs before, but it's complete bullshit. It's like, it's hard for me not to have a whole storyline where Peter would be DMing Anita drama of sorts and thinking it's his new girlfriend. Yeah. No, it's gonna be really hard to not rate that. Well, to not play her. Right. I think it's the hardest part of all. I love your T-shirt, by the way. Thank you. I found it on Grailed. Grailed, of course. Non-paid unpaid unpaid unpaid. My God. And can I just say Grailed has instead of freaking peep. They don't care about me. I saw this. I just looked up Britney T's because I was like, I don't feel like I have enough Britney T's. This came up first and I thought, one might as well be a bullseye. I love it. I can love it more. It's charlots on the back too. It's like, it's the greats. Talk about a grail. Yeah. If you're a renter, you should be taking advantage of built. We rack up points on groceries, travel, and nearly everything else. So why not on one of your biggest monthly expenses? With built, paying rent, finally pays off. 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Don't forget to use my link our link even EXP Are ESS VPN dot com slash ride pod to get an extra four months of express VPN for free Quince addicted with summer and full swing God, don't you just feel that familiar urge to refresh your closet But I'm trying not to waste money on pieces all only rare ones or just for one season. So that's where quince comes in Their clothes are timeless. They feel luxurious. 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It's like so cutie and you wear it with little boxer shorts and you walk into the room and go Oh, I didn't realize your house was like this Wait, can everyone do that everyone who sleeps with a guy when he comes in his house look around and say oh, I didn't realize your house was like this The female this girl woke up in my house. This is I woke up in your house Give your summer closet an upgrade with quince go to quince.com slash ride for free shipping on your order And 365 day returns even Christmas one of the satanic holidays that's q-i n-c-e.com slash ride to get free shipping and 365 day returns quince.com slash ride Wait, where are we going who cares ride should we get into it hitchhikes? Let's do it. Oh, okay I really loved reading these and hearing them and we're gonna do more hitchhike episodes Mom name is I thought about doing it. So imagine this just imagine what this prank would have been I was going to email the thing under different emails and keep sending you the same audio of me saying my name is spending I just don't ruin the prank. What's over now? It was too. I was too tired. You've changed. Let's get into hitchhike Jackson Say bendie a Jackson bendie a Yeah, it's actually showing kind of doesn't you don't hear it as much in that it's kind of like sometimes when people sing and you don't hear the British accent right It's very it's subtle. It's interesting linguistically. It's interesting. What's your favorite part about staying with me right now? Unlimited hugs. I would say is a huge one and just pinky. I feel like pinky is like really enjoying life out here. She is locking into life with That that wait, I say one thing before we get into hitchhikes. I someone posted on overheard LA and it says woman to her chihuahua and it says we've had this conversation a thousand times. You can't do this to me right now. I'm 95% sure that this was me yesterday. Same. I said that out loud and I had headphones in so I didn't know how loud I was talking I was walking to go get him tiger and I literally said pinky. We've had this conversation a thousand times. Oh, it's you. We're not doing this. Oh, you meant that it actually is you. I really think that it was me wow I have no way of proving it obviously, but Maybe it just says something about people that chihuahua as we talk to them like they're humans, but what a mind I say this all the time all the time. Yeah, we we're having fun right now. I love tanning yesterday and doing story posts and just having fun Weaponizing close friends. Weaponizing close friends. I'm doing whatever you really need to do in order to Survive and feel seen out here Jackson. I love you. Okay. Let's do it. Let's hear it. Hey, Mary Beth and Danny Want to see love you guys huge peroni day one here I today I'm writing for bragging and you're probably like wait, that's annoying bragging annoying, but I really write for bragging, especially from like girls, skays, days who want to like promote their accomplishments. I feel like people don't do that. I don't know if it's like Yeah, you got promoted at work. Let's brag about it like you got Like amazing vintage top on deep off like brag about it like brag about those accomplishments. We're not talking about like Brad and Chad to brag about being in like a stupid pick up basketball league. That would be insane to brag about like the girl Their accomplishments and like brag about it. We love it. Okay. Bye. I love you guys Braggadocious. This is just delicious to me. You know what's even more fun It's bragging about your friends. Sorry. I don't want to talk about it. Goddamn thing at dinner. Just bring up Mary Beth Please in a general today. I had a meeting with today and someone asked me he goes my final question to you What is Benny's workout routine? I said Thank you so much for asking Because I would love to brag about this fucking brick shit house that I host the podcast with that you are all up on I've said it lately our sexual attention is crazy Jackson. Jackson emailed me. He said is everything good at home Oh, we were talking about how if we tried to convince Terry that we had hooked up he would just never believe it No, like there's nothing we could say even if we had actually done it to make him think that we had I think even if I showed him video. He'd be like baby like AI is so fine. I came and you used AI and you're literally bothering me right now Yeah, so bragging is so powerful. I agree. I don't think it comes naturally to Non-straight men and there are a couple people in the industry who I feel like are really good about like being excited for themselves But not to the point where it's annoying and I've always tried to be like I need to take that in a little bit It's hard. I think it's yeah, it's not natural for Girls gays and days as you so eloquently said to do that because I think we're in the business of making Ourself smaller and then if you make yourself too big then you're immediately, you know, it's the Well, you're not attractive and you're disgusting and you're just So you're hideous and you're a bitch and I'm sick of you not pissing on me Yeah, I think that's my thing I think the way that we do it more is by doing it for your friends like sometimes It's like you just need your friend to be like can I just brag about my bestie for a second? Everyone's like here he goes here he goes We know Mary that's good in the show No, it's so important but it's I My favorite is my thing. I'll look at people. I'll look them in that and I go isn't she so good on it And I have my mouth a little agate. Well people love people love to ask me about you and what it's like to be friends with you And they ask me a lot like is he is he like that all the time and I say yep What's the like that what are they just like so energetic positive giggly funny They assume you have an off switch and that sometimes you'll just be like laying down and I'm like no Well, yeah, if I ever do that I'm just anxious and I'm thinking about my skin in the corner like it's not that Bragg I love it do it more and say it or they say it really not finished and I think that you've inspired me It's really hard though But I think also what we do is self-promotion. So sometimes it can be so strange. I'm like, "Oh, I don't want to. " Also, I find that when people try to give me a compliment, I immediately come in with a negative thing just to, like, I don't know, balance the scales. And I'm like, I've actively tried to stop doing that. It's really hard. It's really, really hard. Someone said recently, they're like, "What's your favorite physical characteristic?" I was like. What does that mean? Like, what's your favorite. What's your favorite fictional character, Benny? What's yours? What's your favorite physical characteristic on anyone or on yourself? On yourself. Oh, okay. Mine's these Tim Burton eyes. Oh, really? It's your eyes? I think so. Yeah. Yeah, I didn't. I said, I don't really know how to answer. I'm like, "I don't know." I think they'd be my. These are like, they'll talk about my weird elbow, but that's not right now. Please leave it out. It's not for right now. I think for me, it's either my butt chin or my butt. Yeah, totally. I have, like, my butt is just kind of always spin-topic conversation. I use to have a big butt. That's what a lot of people don't know. It's gone, but I had it at one time. And I loved it. It was like a defining characteristic. Yeah. And then it went away. I don't know what I'll do if this guy leaves me. Hey, I don't think it's going anywhere. Don't go anywhere, girl. I think it's here to stay. We got a couple more seasons, hopefully. All right. Let's rock and roll. Let's rock and roll. Into the next one. Hello, lovelies. My name is Michaela. And I am writing for hard resets. Not happy with your life. You got to do a hard reset. Sometimes you can choose to reset the system yourself. And then sometimes you get the little metaphorical rainbow spinny wheel of death thing. And you got no other choice. Force quit. Graduated with no drop prospects in your living at home. Hard reset yourself. I hardly said it myself to teach English and Vietnam. And then I was sick of bucket showers and sharing beds with strangers. Hard reset it myself to a corporate job. A house, a husband, living on a lake in the Midwest. And then I got cheated on by said husband by the local bartender. And also hard reset it myself moved to London. Now I live my life jet setting across Europe for work. In the last words of Carrie Bradshaw, you just got to breathe and reboot. Well, that just gave me chills. So there's this book called Wild. Is she not Cheryl Straid just now blew me away? This is a hard reset and tale of two cities. And can I say on a minor level to me a hard reset? Last week, I got a haircut and a spray tan on the same day. Well, I did not wake up at that overcompensating and queer is folks spending drama that I was the day prior. You went to bed, queer is folks, Benny drama. You woke up. Benziye. My fucking name is Benziye. Someone said some young peers were, I love this, that the young queers were doing this in the lower east side recently. They were saying that it was some day. They're all, it's brain rot. It's just in the pussycat dolls in a way. So good. This, I love this hard reset. Also, it sounds like you are so good at this, which takes a lot of, I wish I could say anything else, but balls. Lair, verb, balls. I think it can be really hard and it can be really scary. So I had this thing where I have a couple of friends where I want them to just let me make every decision for them for six months. And then they can tell me if their lives get better. You almost did this with a friend we share. Yes. And so, and she is on that list. And so I have one friend who needs a life reset so desperately, but she just, she's very risk averse. And so it's frustrating for me as someone that's done the hard reset, like multiple times throughout my life. And even in adulthood, I just think like people should, it is scary, though. It's like, it's very privileged to be like, if I blow up my life right now, like I will be okay. And I'll end up like, because I have friends and family who are very supportive. But I think if you have that safety net, like what is stopping you from like trying something new? And the worst thing that happens is you want to go back to what you're doing before. I just think like, I don't know, life's too short. And we need to yolo. We need to be resetting more when, when the universe calls us to do that. Because I think you can feel it. It's also about intuition. I say, I don't believe in God, but I believe in like a universe and energy. Something I believe in Mary Beth. I believe in Harvey Dent. And I just feel it, you know what I mean? Like I, I'm like, this just feels wrong. I got a, this isn't right. Like I, I don't know. There is something to, you have to trust your instinct. And yeah, if you are in the privileged position of being like, I'm going to go teach and Vietnam. Fuck yeah. I think that's incredible. One of my friends is doing a hard reset right now. Our friend, I know, she's literally just like leaving LA. She's going to Rome doing cooking school. And I'm like, in my heart, I'm like, I can't wait to meet the hottest European man at a dinner with you. And we just laugh. And then the first guy guy really enjoys. Right. No, I just like, that's all I want. I just like, I, I want this for all my, all my lassies who are not getting the life that they deserve. Go out. And it is so hard. It's like Terry's dad always says the Senator. I call him Senator Ferragamo. As I call him, he laughs every time I say it. That could do not. Full of course. He's so wasn't supposed to have me in his life. You know what I mean? And then he, he's got. But he's welcomed you with open arms. And I know he's listening right now. We love you. He talks about just like happiness is just really hard. Like, just being consistent with finding that. And I think it does. Yeah, it's like action. I think through action, you can find those moments of happiness. Oh, I like to acknowledge straight men who are doing a good job on the pod. Like my friend, my friend whose boyfriend did a return for her in the mail. He returned some pants that I thought was like such a heroic act of bravery. My cousin, my cousin is, she's just the best. She is three beautiful children. And her husband is like, God, he's just the blueprint. I'm like, men, he should teach a class or write a book. But we were at a family gathering recently. And one of the kids was like crying. And my cousin snapped her fingers literally. And he stood up and went to 10 to the child. She snapped her fingers. She was holding a glass of wine. I was like, "Fangas, do yourself. You can do it." Literally, you can do it all by yourself. She had a lot of wine in one hand and she snapped her fingers with the other. It wasn't in like a disrespectful type of way. It was just like, he was able to clock exactly what she meant. Try to let it see. And then he went and then just dealt with it. And it was just like, whoa. Let people inspire you on every side. I know what I mean. Let's leave it at that. And let's leave it at that. Next. Thank you, Michaela. That was Michaela. I love it. I'm just going to cut to the chase. Totally. Never trust a man. A abbreviation. Except my cousin's husband. And T-A-M. That's what I ride forward today. Yesterday, tomorrow, now, she's at the side. She's at the fair. I don't think it requires any further explanation. Just going to repeat what more time. Never trust a man. Thank you. Thank you, sweetie. That was the jokers to you. I can't add to. I just amplify at this point. I just can't tell how I go. I mean, we couldn't love you more. You are so clearly our biological daughter. Yeah. I hope you're having fun at whatever state fair you're at. I hope you've got a piece of meat. In my head, you had corn. OK. I'm thinking, well, maybe corn for dinner. If it's a love corn, it's so long. And I have some right here and I've been snacking. Do you have love corn down there? I have love corn. They have it here at the Deer Media Office, which is where we're coming to you from today. Rare. I love this ethos. I think, of course, we hope that one day this won't be the case. But I understand why we're in the position to have this approach and let them prove you wrong, I would say. Yeah. They won't, probably. No, but my cousin's husband is not included in this by the way. I would go tiptoe into it always. I really don't. Yeah. Go quietly into the night. Because I've even been watching some of it. And I'm like, no, he's such a nice guy. And then two weeks later, I'm like, how did he do my ass? How'd you get through me? Because I'm pretty good. I'm-- You're a skeptic, I would say. You're approaching the skepticism. I am always skeptic at dinners. I find it so funny. Can I just say this? It's my one kind of scary thing. I find it so funny how relaxed these men are at dinners with me. And I'm like, I am reading you down, girl. The second you go up to the shitter. Oh, well, you're clocking now. The second you go up to the shitter and part at the urinal, I'm saying crazy shit to your girl. Oh, honey, we're going all the way out. Yeah. And by the way, go wipe. No, please. But yeah, I'm just like, I sit up straight because I think my message to all straight men is a dinner with a girl's gay is much more important than you think it is. It's somewhat say more important than a dinner with her father. I completely agree. Yeah. I completely agree. So just, yeah, carry that with you. I don't like that. Also, I want all the girls listening to this to send the thirst trap I posted recently to their boyfriend and say, why didn't you like this? Why don't I see you liking this? You should have liked this. This is an immediate like. Immediate like. It's not cheating. My Discover tab is the most toxic place on the internet. I sent you three screenshots from my Discover tab. It is women with the largest breasts, tiniest waist, in bikinis on the beach with perfect lighting. All right. And I support the work, obviously. But what did I do to get this? I have a straight man's Discover tab. Well, mine is, you know, yeah, I looked at a few people for body and spell. What do you want me to say? And then close. And so now it is such a, I mean, it's just like, it's porn. It's porn. Can we just call it a space? It's porn my love. It's pornographic. It's pornographic at best. N, T, A, N, N, ATM. Yes. Let's go to the next one. Unless it's your-- Husines, Husbands. Yeah, but. This podcast is brought to you by Squarespace. Squarespace is the all-in-one website platform for entrepreneurs to stand out and succeed online. Whether you're just starting out or managing your growing brand, Squarespace makes it easy to create a beautiful website, engage with your audience and sell anything from products to content to time, all in one place, all in your terms. You can imagine the smile that went across my face. I was looking at this like interior design website. And I went to the bottom. And I was like, oh, this is really beautiful. At the bottom, it said, powered by Squarespace. And I go, hey, hey, aren't we all real? We all. Squarespace makes it easy to sell. access to content on your websites, like online courses, blogs, videos, and memberships. I'd get a Benj from a membership, and referring revenue by gating your content behind a paywall. Simply set the price and choose whether to charge a one-time fee or subscription for access. And then just on that note, I'm gonna say some of my favorites, product features if that's cool. So I personally love the sell content. I'm really the one that I just did. No keep that. We both love it. Grow credibility. No. No. I will fucking fight you. I will fight you. Grow credibility and engage visitors with an unrivaled suite. Oh, it's like. I'm visual design effects. I am really going to wet my pants. 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I'm all about doing the thing and sometimes doing the thing needs making a doctor's appointment. ZopDoc is a free app and a website both where you can search and compare high quality in network doctors and click to instantly book an appointment. I have used this myself. With ZopDoc you can book an in-network appointment with more than 100,000 doctors across every specialty. Not all at once though. For mental health to dental health the primary care to urgent care and more. God knows I got a filling in my tooth when I had a cavity out in Los Angeles. I found my dentist on ZopDoc. Like we really connected there. Oh and that's it's so funny. This dental hygienist recently while she was flossing my teeth as did you really try to have sex with girls? So stop putting off those doctors appointments and go to ZopDoc.com/ride to find an instantly book atop rated doctor today. That's z-o-c d-o-c dot com/ride. ZopDoc.com/ride. And here's the little production note. I want us to play the special effects the little victory. ZopDoc Sonic logo right now. Hit it! Okay hi my loves. My name is Vanessa and this week I write for scrunchies. Now girlies engaged in non-binary bays all know that we always have like one for scrunchies. They're using the buttocks and she really does take it and take it and take it cause she's loyal. So I love you guys and hope you have an degree week. Okay so some of these I can't help but picture them abducted in the back. I picture them like this. No but tell me they wouldn't still be able to be on her own HQ. They just need one hand. Women are incredible. Yeah scrunchies so every girl has that one scrunchie and/or hair tie where it's like you can't lose this one because it's like the perfect level of stretchiness. I love when someone threatens me with like I'm just like I needed it for two seconds. No and it's really been through stuff with you. I have this silk scrunchie which is given to me by my hair stylist and I know that there was a huge plotline on Sex and the City about women in New York wearing scrunchies. I think women in New York wear scrunchies when they're at home and they're in private. True a true scrunchie. A hair tie obviously that's for any occasion. But I do think that was a really important plotline. Obviously the burger era is really tough. She ain't from New York. It's a top line read. You know what I hate when he goes nice hat. And she goes the hat is fabulous. Who says is that burger? For her. Oh, get it while it's hot. It's so me. I tell me I wouldn't act like that. Oh, I know. Her showing up with her's it from New York. Get it while it's hot. She is so me fuck. Sometimes I really am like shit. That's me seeing yourself reflected in the media. I love scrunchies. Keep your scrunchies close near and dear. I love scrunchies too. I love I love when my girl's got her scrunchy on. I know as me she's comfortable. She's about to do some shit. You are. Hey, slot slayers. My name is Sarah and I ride for having no weekend plans. Please tell me is there anything better than waking up on a Saturday morning with nothing to do if you enjoy coffee, maybe a mosey around a couple stores? You just go where the wind takes you. My opinion. That's live in large. Love you sweat. Love you sweat. Love you sweat. Nothing. You just saying that it's tintillating. I get goose bumps down my spine. I mean yesterday. Yesterday. What did we do? Take them through our day. So yesterday. No plans. No plans. I got to your house. We laid by the pool for two hours. Then we went inside for a bit. We did some stuff on our phones. I posted a photo dump. First, I exported a video from Premiere Pro because I had made a super, a super cut of dust that I wanted to share with the world about English, female English. And then we laid by the pool. We went back inside and then we went back out to the pool because we realized that there was still sun on the on the lunch chairs. And then we ordered Goop Kitchen for lunch. I mean, we ordered Sepurga for dinner. And then what did we watch? We watched sleeping with the enemy strident Julio Roberts. It is a total classic trigger warning. It's a little intense, but in the title makes absolutely no sense. And I thought about it as I went to sleep. How the title was so. It was almost like they named the file the wrong thing, but then they just had to go with it. Well, the specs script had that name, you know, so they're like, sure. There's a bunch of movies like that. I think sometimes it's like comedies or this is definitely not a comedy, but like in romcoms or romantic thrillers, I guess, in this instance. Like, it's just not adding up totally sometimes the titles. And it's really hard to think of a title that makes sense. Could I give you a better one? No, I have nothing. That's the only note I would say for sleeping with the enemy. But to me, I'm like, I don't even know what else it would be. I think maybe now it would be like what her new name was in the town. Yeah. They would say like Sarah Waters is what it would be called or something. Yeah, I give me 10 minutes to think and I could come up with a few title options. But wait, because her last name is Waters. And she escapes through the waters. It would be something like that. Yeah, yeah, yeah, totally like learns to swim. Right. Yeah. Or like Laura. Do you see how having no weekend plans can really open up a conversation in a dialogue? Because like, if we had made plans, if we had gotten tickets to go to the movies or something, we wouldn't have stumbled into that perfect film. But Terri and I did see materialist the night before and I will talk about it in season six. Season six. We're writing it down. I have the time of my life, a beer and a Coke. Dakota Johnson says that. That's her order. And I go, I like that. Okay. She's not like other girls. Do you know the first day that I had with Terri, I ordered a Coke and a tequila sunrise. And that was the drinks I got at dinners at the time. How did you come out? All right. Next. My name is Shannon and I'm writing for sharing your location with your friends. I just love it. I think it's so fun when you live in the same city as all your friends and you just all share your location. Yeah. And you can just see what all your little tomagotchies are up to tomagotchies. You know, they're when they're getting food, when they're going to the park. Yeah. And you can also just show up and find them wherever they are. You can just open your little find my. I love it. It's called the night. I can go. Find my mind. Your friend Christina. Yeah. Find my J and find my Marybeth. Find my own. You know, internally talking, but it's consentious. You don't want to know where she's at. And you can just go. I heard consensual stalking. I mean, your friends are. And it's amazing. And there's consensual stalking at its core. And it's my favorite thing on my phone. Hi. Okay. I love that there was no outro on that. She just said, I'm done speaking and that's that. Yeah. She threw her phone across the room. She did. I love find my I love to find my blank app. My friends and I use it all the time, especially when we're meeting up at a place and maybe I'm there first. And so I want to see how far away everyone is. What I love is when everyone's on vacation separately. And you can open that map and just see where your friends are. It's so beautiful. And then all over. - Hempen all over the world. - It's also titillating about having it for someone that you've fallen out with. I love seeing, like you've had a falling out with them and you go, oh my God, they're in Midtown. - I have to tell you. - That's crazy. I'm like, what could they possibly be doing? Are they thinking of an apology in Midtown? I love it. - The first guy that ever ghosted me, his name was Joey and he went to Michigan. And he shared his location with me the first night we met. We followed each other on fine friends up until recently and I finally, like just was like, I actually don't need this on my map anymore. He fully, first person to ever ghost me. It was insane, but I had his location. - To do that in location. There's something. - Men are not in your fingers. - Do you understand duality? - They're not in your fingers because to me, I go, well, if I know exactly where he is, then I'm obviously gonna see him again. Like we'll cross paths, we'll hang out. But that's not the case. It's just not the case. - These mind games. - Yeah, he was a friend of a friend. I did see him later in life like a couple years down the road and yeah, I was like, oh yeah, you like ghosted me and he's like, oh yeah, you know. - Hey. - Hey, no big deal. - There's no big deal. This is how we do. - This is no big deal. - Till and they backtrade something. - No, we do it like that. - No, we do. (laughing) - Dude, dude, dude. - This is how we do. - Okay, last one. Or do you wanna continue on? - Well, I've got more to say. Never cut off a man with some middle of a thought. - Oh my God. - So here's the thing. I love this, but I don't totally at times because I am just like, oh, sometimes I wanna turn it off. I'm like, does everyone need to know where I am all the time? - Oh, don't share it with people that are sitting. - I like that you and Terry know, but sometimes I'm like, oh my God, this person has it on for me. I don't know if I need them to know where I am all the time because sometimes you know what I'm doing? - Shitting. - No, I'm just in bed and I just, I don't want you to know I'm home. You know, I just wanna go to bed. So sometimes it should be consensual and I don't like that. - Oh totally. - But oh God, it's so fun to see where my air pods are and what Terry is. I mean, they're not ever with you. - They're never the same thing. But guess what? For the first time in history, it's like how am I think the world is, days that are your mom's birthday and aren't? Guests today, I thought where is Terry and where are my air pods? They were together. He took mine. - He took mine. You know what's so funny? I walked in the house the other day and I put my air pods down and Terry goes, are you sure those are yours? And I was like, yeah, 'cause I just walked in with them. - So I, so yeah, so these are mine. I just had them in my hand. - And I was like, and then he was like, oh, I found mine actually. I guess it turns out they were yours. - They were mine. The way he polices it yet is absolutely-- - Oh, oh, yet has had a saga with his air pods ending up in Stockholm, ending up in Tokyo. Remember when he could not keep a pair of air pods to save his life? - Those were not his, my love. - Oh no. - Those were my girls. He lost the twins. - Oh. - And I go, you think he could be a father? You lost the twins. The girls are still in Stockholm. - You have to give him in the egg as a project. - Yeah, I don't. I threw him a 90s TV show. - I loved that. - Next. - My name is Kami, and I'm writing for a fantastic thing. - This is Kami Mendez. - There is absolutely nothing more freeing than ending up on your coffee table, making all of your friends around you in a circle, and just a fantastic thing. - She doesn't even have to do everything. - Every day, every day, every dinner. - Every day, I want to tell everyone, 'cause you feel bad about it. - Kami can tell. - Or it can't be a big deal, you know, if you've been-- - I don't know. - Shooting on your taxes, and you want you to confess it. It's just really freeing, and I don't think you should keep secrets from your friends anyways, so you might as well make a big spectacle of confessing things. - Kami, wow, if you guys-- - We love you. That's amazing. - It's very powerful. - There's a confession in there also. I mean, to say the tax thing, it just feels like-- - For that to roll off the tongue. - It must have been top of mind, if I'm just saying-- - Holy, I mean, we don't have your last name, so don't worry about it. - Exactly, it's not a big deal. - I love the idea of confessing things. If there's something you've done that you wouldn't want your friend to know, then that's more reason to say. And to just lay it all on the table. - I have nothing to confess to you. - No. - You know everything. - We are still learning things, like the whole-- - Oh my God, I loved our key story. - That was crazy when we found that out. - I know. - I don't know why that was so funny. - It can't be true. - I thought, I can't believe I don't-- I was sleeping with the enemy. - But there's no secrets, sleeping with the enemy. - Yeah. - I have told you everything that I could potentially get canceled for, and I feel like we have that. That's just-- - I told you mine. - Between us. And I think it's just really important. - Yeah, like talking about things, it takes the power away from it. So if there's something you're feeling guilty about, obviously I was raised Catholic, so I like to confess. I think it feels good. It makes you feel like your soul doesn't have that laying upon it. - I mean, I think there can be nothing better than that. Just the lightness and just being like, you know what, I gotta get this off my chest. My love. - I gotta get this off my gigantic tits. - Is this table sturdy? 'Cause I gotta get this. I love Kami just that everything she goes to, she just makes sure all the tables are sturdy. - She's got confessions. - She went, you know, when tables are wobbly and they bring over a little wedge. And she goes, can we get this taken care of really quick? - Sorry, it's just a little, sorry, we moved it, we moved it attached just so we could add another person and now it's wobbly. - So how much weight can this table hold? - Every single restaurant we go to, Terry adjusts the table and then it doesn't work anymore, so then we have to call them over. - I kind of love it, it's our game. It's how we flirt with the waiters. - And you know, that's my whole vibe, too. - I know. - I need it on solid ground. If the bones are good, the rest don't matter. - Exactly. - Wait, let's all step out of fricking table this week and confess that we love some of Robert's. - I love it. - I love confessions. I've been confessing all kinds. - Confessions of a shopaholic. Confessions of a teeny drama queen. - She didn't confess shit and confessions of a shopaholic. - So what, the girl likes shoes. We were alone. (laughing) - Fuck yeah. - Oh my God, I can't wait to talk about the essence sale. That bitch would have been in prison. - Yeah, she would have gone to jail. - That is just saying that they would have been different if we lived in the time of the essence sale. - I loved confessing. - Yeah. You know what you are, Mary Beth. - Bisexual? - Well, yeah. But you're also my ride or die. - Ride or die. - So what's the ultimate ride for you, this hitchhike? - Which car are we getting in? - Yeah, it's really hard. I liked them all as the thing. - I think that everyone now, I couldn't tell if my baby daughter was talking about bragging about yourself, but I think right now we need to shout from the goddamn rooftops when our friends are doing something because it is such a scary time. And I'm like, I'm so proud of this girl right here across from me like it's actually insane what you were going through and you did a fucking press tour. And I just think it's amazing. It's no different than Natalie Portman being pregnant during the press tour for Black Swan. - Wow. - I am so proud of my girls. - Women can do anything. And I just, I think we have to brag about people and you know what, do it tonight. Bragging about someone around you. And even if they kind of get a little blushy and they show their type 2 rosacea, like let them do that. And just I think we need to brag about the people around us 'cause it is hard. I feel like those kids and they don't brag about themselves, but you know what, we should. - Celebrate each other. - Yeah. - And I think bragging. - I think bragging on other people's behalf is so powerful and it just makes you feel good. It's almost like giving a compliment. - Maybe too. And you know what, to your partner or to you or staying on a table from Ethan Allen at a friend's heart also, you go guess. - Yeah. I'm the fucking king of the world and just standing on the, (laughs) and just saying to someone at a dinner, this chick woke up in the house. - This chick woke up in my house is so massive for me personally. That is the ultimate brag. - It's the ultimate brag. - She woke up with my fucking house. - How lucky am I? That's what I want. And you know what, if any straight guys are listening, a guy that's obsessed with his girlfriend. - A guy that's a simp for his girlfriend. - That's so hot to me. I'm just obsessed. - So I agree about bragging and I think this is something that you practice and I really admire it about you. And so for me, I think my ultimate ride of this episode is not having weekend plans. You can really see like what you and your gay bestie can get up to when there's just no rules. You take the rule book and you throw it out the window. - I went to camp by the way. - I was there when Hans Zimmer made that. Obviously it's Hans Zimmer. - Oh, God. You know what, the second you pierced my ear, I looked like Robin, Tegan, or Sarah in a good way, like immediately, but other people are good with nearing. I don't think I would do nearing anywhere. I think the only place maybe I would get it would be higher, almost like y'all. - I have a pitch for Grace season two. We'll talk about it offline. - I have a really. - I can't tell you what it is. - The Ram's not in session. - I know, but. (laughs) - I love you guys so much, but we're in the car now with our girls. - Yep. - And they just put what was that on? - In the back. - In the back. - In the back. - God, I'm full of pupils up. - Oh, my accent. - Any babe, I'm on my own. - There you go. - Rye, rye. - Please note that this episode may contain paid endorsements and advertisements for products and services. Individuals on the show may have a direct or indirect financial interest in products or services referred to in this episode.