Iraq w/ Giulio Gallarotti | You Be Trippin' with Ari Shaffir

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Head to curehydration.com and use code TRIPPIN for 20% off your order. That's curehydration.com, code TRIPPIN, for 20% off. Subscribe and save, so you'll never run out. And you can pause or cancel anytime. This is funny how fucking filthy this place is, but it looks, just here, it looks pretty solid. I mean, it's like I have to step over things as I touch the cameras. Dude, it's one of the more impressive overall things I've ever seen. I'm so not built for it. Like, it works so well, obviously. Like, your episodes all look fucking amazing. It's so cool. Yeah, but whenever I have it, like, you're a, you know, fucking dork like me, but like, whenever I have like a, like a, I don't know, like an actor or some writer, and I'm like, I'm so sorry. Where you been and where you going? This is Ari's Travel Show, yeah. We're gonna talk about travel today. It's You Be Trippin', yeah. Welcome to You Be Trippin', everybody. It's a travel podcast every week. It's a different place with some guests, who's been there, and we just talk about it. Kind of more, less what you're supposed to do, more what you just did. Just what you did. And, somebody said you're supposed to get just out of your vocabulary. Just? Yeah. Interesting. There's better words. Interesting. Anyway, Giulio Gallarotti is a guest second time. Huge honor. Last time, Afghanistan. Yes, sir. Hell yeah. Yeah. Where do you wanna go today? Where are we doing? Dude, we're doing Iraq. Okay. Okay, this is great, because, I've already told people no more Amsterdam. It's all the same story of getting too high. It's like all the same exact story. And then, no resorts, I've had to dump a few. It was like, I don't know if I told you this last time, it was like, it was great, we rented a kayak. They brought us margaritas, and like, all right. And then, but, and then other places-- Do you enjoy a resort? I have enjoyed it. Listen, you're like me, we're not first class guys. But, if I get bumped up to first class, I'm not like, this is bad. - Hundred percent, hundred percent. - Yeah. - I want that upgrade all day, dude. - Yeah, it's not worth $900. - Nope, but I'll take it for free. - Yeah. Yeah, I'll take it for free. I'll take it for free. Should be a great name of a Jewish podcast. Take it for free. Yeah, and I've even had a few Israels, but like, I don't think any from Jews. Osmus, Bowers, I'm trying to think who else. But like, all right, different experience. Two whole parishes. No Iraqs. - No Iraqs. - No Iraqs. - No Iraq, good. Fuck yeah. I'm glad to be the first to react to it. - When'd you go, why? What the fuck? - Yeah, yeah. Okay, so, first let me say, last episode I did of this show was probably the most fun I've ever had on a pod. - Nice. - I appreciate it. - Hell yeah. - You know, it's one of those things where, I know we probably talked about this briefly last time, but you show up to a party and you have all these fucking stories, you can't just start telling stories the whole dinner. You know what I mean? So it turns into-- - God, you want to though. - You want to. And it turns into something where it's like, I start only talking about it when I'm asked. And you'd be amazed how often people don't ask. They want to know about the fact that I know famous people. - It's so weird. You're like, guys, this isn't what defines, like, I have better shit here. I have way better shit. - Do you know Matteo Lane? I'm like, yes, I do, I do. He's a great guy. So, yeah, dude. So anyway, fun to-- - So you had a good time last time? - It was the best, it was the best. - Nice. - So anyway, okay. Iraq. So, I had been doing, I made the video in Rwanda and then I made a sort of-- - In Rwanda? - The first video of these I did was in Rwanda. - Okay, what are the videos called? Do you have a title for them? - Yeah, so it's just on my YouTube channel. Not Julio is the channel, and I have a bunch of these videos. They're getting really fucking good. - It's not spelled with a J, right? - Not Julio, yeah. - With a J. - With a J. - Oh, because you're-- - Because I'm Julio. - Julio, yeah. - Yeah, it's-- - Not Julio. Okay, that makes sense. - Anyway, so that's the channel. You can find all these on there. They're all really fucking good, honestly. And they're getting better and better. So anyway. - Nice. - Did a Rwanda video. I was amazed at how different it was than I thought it was gonna be. Then I started putzing around, trying to experiment, and I was like, you know what? I've been hearing that people are going to Iraq. I've heard that now you can do a visa on arrival there, so you don't even have to-- - Really? - Yeah, it's still the case. - That's so huge. - This is a while ago, too. It's like 2022 I did it, in the fall, I think. - Wow. - Maybe 2021. I don't, either 2020 or 2022. - The visa on arrival is so, when I went to Southeast Asia, it was just like-- - It's huge. - Yeah. - It was huge. - It was like, oh, you gotta look up which country you're not gonna be able to get into. - Yes. - So get those ahead of time. And then others, Thailand is like, sure, welcome. - Dude, 100%. And it's one of those things that we're lucky because we have a pretty solid passport here in America. And the word visa typically only refers to a credit card for most Americans. No one's thinking about going to a lot of places where you'd need one. - Right, right, right. - You don't need one for Europe, you don't need one for the islands, whatever. So just to make sure, I feel like this matters. - Yeah. - Yeah, 2021, November 2021. So put this plan together to do this trip. Lied to my parents and told them I was going to the birthplace of civilization, which is not a lie. And not like it's any of their business, I guess, but I was like-- - It's a lie. - I'm going to Mesopotamia, which-- And my dad is like a, he's a political science professor. - Yeah. - So he like, theoretically know, like that brings up a red flag for him. And he's like, what the fuck are you talking about? He goes, I know the ancient places you're going to, but what are the modern places? So in this video that I made, which is one of the best ones I've probably made, my Places You Can Go Iraq, it's called. - Yeah, Places You Can Go in Iraq. - Places You Can Go Iraq. - Wow. - I filmed the phone conversation with my dad. It's pretty funny. He's like, what the fuck are you talking about? I was like, I think I'm going to Kuwait. I think I'm, so anyway, I make this whole plan. My girlfriend at the time, who's now my wife. - Congratulations. - Thank you. It took some time. - Yeah. - It took some time to convince her that this was a good idea. And it was pretty incredible. - I mean, I could see why people would go, no. - Yeah, and so it's interesting because with Afghanistan, I was like, it's going to be fine. It was fine, but it was still more of the Afghanistan that maybe I didn't want it to be, if that makes sense. There was, I had some scary moments in the Afghanistan trip. - Okay. - This trip was so incredible in every single way that it made me think that there wasn't a dangerous place that existed on earth. For real. - There was not one? - There is not one. That was like, and that was my whole thing. I was like, what's it like really like? I'm hearing that people are going like, I want to check it out. Dude, it was amazing. It's the best trip I've ever taken. - What? - It's, I recommend it for vacation. - What? - I recommend it for a honeymoon. - Wow. - I know that sounds insane and annoying, but I stand by that. - Honeymoon. - Stand by that. And every like travel person I know who's been there, like fully agrees with me and is like, isn't it crazy that nobody has any idea? I'm like, dude, I know. It's insane. - I mean, what are we talking? First world, third world? - Third world. - Third world. - But like, third world, third world is a pretty wide range. - It is. - Most of the world is third world. So like-- - Yeah, the Bangkok airport is like, this is a really lovely airport. And then you go outside and you're like, oh, pestilence. - That's hilarious. Yeah, dude, totally. So, you know, in Baghdad, there's nice shit. Like there's coffee shops and stuff where you're like, if I remember putting on my Instagram story, where am I? And like, people were like, Sweden. Like, yeah, yeah. And I can even show you some of these. But-- - Oh yeah, we gotta plug this shit in. - Yeah, so I don't have, no, I have the new one. - That's okay, I'll do this. - Yeah, you have that? Cool, cool. - Hold on, there's another one. - Yeah. So just, and dude, such a well-rounded trip in every way. - Keep going, listen. - Yeah, you're good. - So, okay, who'd you go with? - So, I went with my guy who I always go with, this guy, Zach, who's an amazing camera operator. And just like, really brilliant eye. Like, and he has sort of like a cinema background. So we make these really cinematic, cool-looking things. So anyway, so I always go with him. - And they're okay with you being a homosexual? - Nice, dude, nice. I think, probably, I think probably. I don't know, I don't know, to be honest. But probably, I think you'd probably be fine. So anyway, the, I hired these people to show me around. So this is funny. The first day we're going there, I get a WhatsApp message from them. And they're like, "Hey, sorry, we're like stuck in, in Sulaymaniyah, which is in Kurdistan, which is like Northern Iraq." - Okay. - And it's sort of its own autonomous area where you actually need a different visa. It's a completely different thing. - Kurdistan? - Kurdistan. - Whoa. - Yeah. So it's a little more like, you know, poor man's-- - But that's already in Iran. - That's, no, it's in Iraq. So Erbil and you see like the top right area? - Erbil, yeah, here. - This is all Iraqi Kurdistan. Like once you get to, so when you see Erbil, Sulaymaniyah, this is all its own autonomous area. - This, all this? - Yeah, all of this. all so they have their own government and they always have they were never really involved in the war and it's a completely different thing they speak a different Kurdistan region Iraq yep so oh is the Kurdistan region Kurdistan province Iran is it go over that border so the whole thing is sort of its own and I think it's different depending on where it is but like it's this area where the Kurds live so it's like eastern Turkey northern Iraq I guess they're into Kurdistan for the Kurds for the Kurds I had this moment of of um outside uh the Whole Foods in Union Square and some guy passed by this like whatever art and it was like um it was like like that it was like uh Ecuadorian like that handbag oh nice it's like that I was like hey you from Ecuador and he goes no Peru I was like oh and he goes oh that's all the same it's Andy's it's like we're the same people got it and I'm like oh right someone else put a border in there way later totally I have that thought all the time yeah and it sounds like this is one of those we're like you're right what absolutely no we're not Iraq Iran we're Kurds oh yeah dude a lot of and and you know unfortunately that phenomenon has caused quite a few problems uh in the world yeah yeah but anyway so yeah Kurdistan has I think always been visa on arrival for forever federal Iraq which is the rest of it yeah was not federal Iraq was like very hard to go to obviously had been very war-torn for many many years Etc Etc so you know now it's 2029 I'm like hi what I wonder what the is going on in Iraq these days and I'm like oh it doesn't really appear like much in a good way I'm like I'm gonna go check it out so visa on arrival all good uh fly through Qatar um I remember getting on the flight to Basra it was like the first gnarly trip I've ever taken like this where's the southern Iraq southern tip of Iraq which is so funny I've heard of these things only from Wolf Blitzer yeah you know like that we're like yeah so Basra looks like the Iraq that you picture in your head right there okay flat hot oil like burning in the distance but the rest of Iraq doesn't really look like that like Baghdad doesn't even look like that um so basically the route that we went we started there in Basra and then we kind of made our way up so we went to Nazaria right there we went to well how'd you go drive you got you rented cars we had a driver yeah and the the people who were showing us around so we went to Nazaria we went to Karbala we went uh all the way up to Baghdad and then we kept going further north into Samara which is uh militia controlled more intimidating sounding than it is in reality but they're not as friendly as the Iraqi soldiers the Iraqi soldiers are gray dude these are these guys rule what and they bust your balls it's so funny like people over there man are just huge pranksters so I was getting pranked left and right oh sorry uh I got some pictures with the boys here somewhere with the soldiers they're pranksters dude they are pranksters I know I know uh there's so many good things to talk about here that's like hard to but I don't know I'll find the soldier's picture and then okay as you're looking for that just glance at it what's your feeling when you land it the boys wow squad these guys rule dude they're all super cool like why they're just awesome like they love and everybody's so stoked that you're there they're so fucking nice there they're so fucking stoked that you're there they're like oh my god they're like oh what's up like you're on YouTube they're like take my picture like YouTube like every single person wants to be on the camera on your camera yes nobody's weird about the camera like I was worried about that like yeah it's just because Saddam's gone no I think like I don't know what it would have been like with Saddam but like the people are just cool ass fucking people dude yeah sorry this is a picture of my wife as a child so anyway uh wow what's what are you holding uh probably a water bottle or something I must have been eating ice cream or something oh I thought it was like change or something and you weren't gonna get robbed or anything you didn't feel like that dude places like this people don't do that shit you know what I mean it's like uh it's like it's like rude or up like people like you're not you're not gonna like have petty crime happen to you in a place like that like a super like devout Muslim country it's not even that I mean there's pretty secular looking people running around too so it's like not it's not that intense okay uh oh hi everybody good to see you there you know uh it's time to break into this episode you know I'm here in uh Latin America you know who's really big is this dark Lord that they have they worship out here practices of dark arts his name is Jesus Jesus Christ I don't think it's any relation to the real Lord and Savior Jesus Christ studying uh his ways I'm not quite there but I'm close I'm close I'm just barely able to get up anyway I'm here to break in today's episode of the dark arts to let you know a little bit about the guest Julio galarati is uh Instagram you should follow him is it not Julio not j-o-l-i-o um he's a master traveler he's one of the best of all time um legitimately um he's top top five comedy travelers he him Harlan Williams um Russell um I'm missing people I'm missing people um but he's up there um he's got a travel series on YouTube also look I mean I mean I am out there if I if I sink I am dead but so far I'm not sinking um he's got his own uh travel series you should watch the Iraq episode we talked about today is up there uh it's on his YouTube um youtube.com slash not Julio um he's also got a brand new episode about Tanzania if you want to see the Iraq one go check out his Tanzania uh video he just released it he went to a rural Tanzania town going through the Industrial Revolution uh a little school at the center of it all okay you guys I like how he didn't just like tell you what's up to eat actually shows you what's there Julio's really kind of doing it right Julio Julio um his website is not julio.com um he'll be April 25th at Big Laugh in Fort Worth for two shows and May 8th and 9th at Coastal Creative in St Pete uh tickets at not julio.com and um and that's it follow him on YouTube follow this podcast on YouTube um youtube.com slash you'll be tripping they don't want you to know everything they don't want you to know everything how windy is this Alan too windy I'd say is that better um that's it you guys let's get back to the episode wait there was something else I was gonna say buy a t-shirt no yeah I missed it well I missed it I missed it what are you gonna do Julio this is a trippy award nominee for most adventurous and best trip I would say most adventurous for sure trippy award nominee uh Julio gallerati coming back now let's get back to the episode oh and that's what I was gonna say please everyone uh enjoy your Ramadan safely and happily uh trying to like get enough at night if you eat at night to really get through the day uh here at you be chipping podcast to this Ramadan two different Arab country podcasts yes we'll care about you and I don't want any trouble let's get back to the episode help me Lord Jesus ah close there there oh I lost it I lost it I lost it ah I lost it I lost it cut cut cut cut I need help the only I guess intense thing I mean there's checkpoints any high security country there's checkpoints you get stopped they ask how long do you stay in each city and stuff a few days a few days and what did you do coffee and just restaurants no no okay so first of all we get there the first day and they're they're in Sulaimaniya like we're doing a TV interview like we're not going to be back okay which is not what you want to hear you're like well what are you talking about let me one more time that's in the south sorry Sulaimaniya is all the way north oh that's Kurdistan they live in Kurdistan okay uh and then I'm in Basra and they're like we're not gonna be there but we're sending a different guy with you which I'm like all right like I don't like this switcheroo but okay and then they're like he's actually not going to be there till tomorrow either so you're just on your own now not knowing about Iraq that's like not great I'm like what the dude like I'm at the airport I'm kind of like stressed out they have this like hotel fee they charge you that's like unofficial yeah and there's some British guy in front of me he's like not paying it you have to pay it he's like no I don't and I'm not going to really I'm sorry um and then he didn't pay and then we did pay it and we and he's like what's up guys he's like what are you doing here uh and we're like oh we're just visiting he goes what the hell why not right and to this day I have no idea whether or not he was being sarcastic I think he was like an oil contractor what the hell why not what does that mean I was like oh you know we're just checking it out and he's like what the hell why not like was he like you're ruining this no I think no but I think he was either like you're an idiot or and I don't understand or like yeah yeah I might as well check it out or like I know what you're going for underage you're going for six-year-old bros and that's fine I don't think it was that loud and clear bro I'm not gonna ask questions is that one of those yeah thanks dude so a taxi and we go to this hotel we get to the hotel it's like immediately fun how about time out how much are taxis um this one must have been 20 bucks 10 bucks okay not much if i recall um and but more on that later okay at the end of this part of the story is really really good in my opinion uh so anyway we get to the hotel the dude working there barely speaks any english but he's like trying to relate he's like will smith you know will smith this is all in the video and dude we found this guy's instagram and he's hilarious it's all these videos of him like pumping iron and uh like such a character wait this is on youtube yeah yeah what's um what is it places you can go iraq okay or you're not okay so go ahead so yeah so then we're like where should we go for dinner and they're like you could go to this place they're like we'll call you a taxi and yeah this is it we'll call you a taxi and you know when you're done with dinner like sorry i would say it's probably like two minutes in as the will smith guy that's so funny what central perk that's a central perk yeah there's a central perk there in what in baghdad yeah isn't that crazy isn't that insane what i know dude wild oh my god that's so cool yeah it's a super fucking gnarly trip uh yeah let's see hold on keep okay uh right there right there right there back uh a little a little forward maybe we'll go a minute forward and you'll see the dude right here right here well i went too far yeah no no you didn't go you didn't quite go far up in like 30 seconds it'll pop up but if you want i can just keep yeah keep talking sorry and then yeah tell me the story uh so anyway we're here at this hotel and they're like all right like go here for dinner so we go and they're like text this number when you're done and the taxi will come get you okay hold on yeah the difference in that like the difference in the taxi is that you're not going to be able to get out of the car and you're not going to be able to get out of the car and you're going to be able to get out of the car and you're going to be able to get out of the car and you're going to be able to lobby of that and what you're seeing is wild yeah yeah the hotel wasn't like bad but it wasn't like super nice it looked nice it was solid okay better than like better than this yeah this is like the classic beginning of a war movie like there's just insurgents and all those things there's profiteers even though there's a ferris wheel yeah exactly yeah uh and basaro was actually apparently never that involved in anything southern iraq even they weren't right at the kuwait border didn't they invade kuwait the wasn't that the first one during the like saddam era with uh like the iran iraq war invading kuwait maybe but like with the americans like fighting them basaro was never super involved as far as my understanding goes okay this is the part here he is let's do it yeah sure oops this is the guy i love will smith yeah he was will smith legendary commenting down on my shit this guy's the goat dude oh my god wow yeah the people who are going to show us so this yeah so john hiya okay okay okay so anyway uh so we go to this dinner and this is the interview they were doing that they couldn't come to meet me for because they were busy they were doing this interview but like i just sounded like fucking sketchy i was like yeah you talking about we had a deal yeah but they're on the sula mania tv show doing this interview like this is what they were doing so all good and now i'm good friends with both of them and talk to them kind of semi-regularly she's got some fucking brooklyn girl she's got that she's got that junk oh would you say brooklyn girl yeah hilarious uh so yeah we new york so yeah these two are married they're cool and yeah they're doing well anyway so we go to this dinner and no english on the menus at all and i didn't know what the fuck the things were fortunately google translate has the image thing where it translates images images of words or or the food images of words so it just goes straight and gives you the basically it'll be like chicken and rice yeah just translate the words like not exactly because there's a little bit of loss in translation shit that happens yeah but yeah if you can like so we're like joking with the guys nobody speaks english we're pointing at what we want they're like all right great we have this great dinner uh then we go to try to figure out the taxi thing now my phone's not working and i'm like fuck like what's going on i had pretty good service most of the trip it's very solid 3g the whole trip but for some reason it hadn't kicked in yet i'm trying to figure it out so we go outside to try to hail a taxi and some random car pulls up and is like get in and zach and i look at each other and we're like this guy's no way who like looks sort of sketch and then we just get in and we're like is this stupid and we show him where we're going he kind of just goes and then we sit there and he's like where are you from and we're like oh america and he's like oh and then he drives us to the hotel yeah and i'm like how much do i owe you he goes no no free free please welcome and that was basically what happened the entire trip everything was basically free the entire trip you go and you try to buy something no no no for you for you gift for you what's there's a catch yeah the catch is that they don't ever see a fucking random guy visiting and they think it's sick everything's free bro they don't let you pay for anything the whole time what it's incredible what yeah it's wild it's wild so like i was buying like there's all these old saddam bills yeah okay yeah crazy right uh all these saddam bills and i was trying to buy them they're like no no for you gift gift please please they're trying to give me a rug i'm like bro i'm not taking a rug no for you i can't travel with that so uh and then after that never look back the guy this guy on the right came to pick us up in the morning he's the fucking man his name's sajad what do you want here we are on this thing called er look it up it's sick so dude that's the other thing about iraq unbelievable like uh how do you spell er you are look at this fucking thing there was a significant sumerian city state oh my god bro like the most ancient shit on earth what is in iraq this is like the literal birthplace of civilization written language was allegedly invented in iraq uh ancient ancient we're talking like you know 5 000 years ago type really do they have a word for deodorant back then this is slightly newer than what i'm talking about this is not er this is er okay er is not like the place where the language is invented but just to give you an idea when was this from i think i don't remember but i want to say look at the people this is how big it is but it's old so you're on those steps dude it was sick and nowhere what the fuck was this just a some fortress or something okay temple um super cool and like there's shit like this all over the country that you've like never heard of like i've never heard of this it's such a weird structure it's not even a pyramid it's like it's weird i know it's it's why it looks like some ancient alien shit so there's stuff like this there's like uh samara is another is another one it's this like insane uh what do they call the winding thing the the circular winding thing samara iraq yeah that thing oh whatever that's called the fuck is that and there's a i'm stupid for not being like a tower of babel it's uh god damn it what the fuck god minaret a minaret a minaret i would not have known that and dude you can just go up dangle your legs off it there's no like no safety yeah i love it the guides were like annoyed about it they're like it's annoying that like they don't there's nothing in place to like preserve this shit you can do whatever the fuck you want which is cool as a visitor and i respect this stuff you know i'm not trying to fuck it all up but they were annoyed they're like you know we want to preserve this stuff you know especially as it's opened up now it's probably going to be like everyone's going to take a piece of it yeah yeah so okay so this is dude so the next day i try not to always check the itinerary too closely because i don't want to ruin it for myself you know but there's a balance between planning properly tomorrow we're going to this okay i'm just like i don't want to know uh but sometimes you need to know it'll make the video better but other time for this it was okay to like discover everything who's making the itinerary the i and i are so you're checking like hit me on the spot with this so i can know right then like i'm not like don't tell me but when i i get the itinerary and i see the things but i'm not like researching what it all is okay hey guys i learned a new scam uh it's when you're in brazil at a carnival and you put your phone in your pocket and then the phone is gone it's crazy what a magic trick no literally all eyes are on you when you have your phone out so use your fanny pack but unfortunately you can't use your fanny pack digitally and that is where cash app comes in your security deserves to be a priority and cash app treats it that way with security lock cash app requires a successful face id or biometric authentication to access your account and you can use your fanny pack to access your account it's like your money is protected by your own personal bodyguard even if your phone is lost or stolen plus if you're about to send money to someone new and cash app notices something looks a bit off or you might be falling for a scam it'll send you a warning before the money is sent to confirm that everything looks right turn on security lock in your cash app settings today and pay attention to scam warnings to keep your money safe learn more at cash.app security for a limited time new cash app customers can earn 10 off the use secure 10 in their profile at sign up and send five dollars to a friend within 14 days terms apply cash app is a financial services platform not a bank banking services provided by cash apps bank partners prepaid debit card issued by sutton bank member fdic discounts and promotions provided by cash app a block inc brand visit cash app slash legal slash podcast for full disclosures. 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Not only does Superpower reduce their price to just $199, but for a limited time, my listeners get an additional $20 off with code TRIPPIN. T-R-I-P-P-I-N. No G. Head to Superpower.com and use code TRIPPIN at checkout for $20 off your membership. After you sign up, they're going to ask you how you heard about them. Make sure to mention this podcast to support the show. Let's get back to the episode. So I see that we're going to the Mesopotamian marshes, okay? Which is this ancient marshland, you know, whatever. And I didn't like look into this, but apparently we were camping. And this is like the second day we're there, the second night we're camping in the middle of these marshes. I'm like, all right, well, what is the alternative? And Sajab was like, okay, you could stay in the marshes. And I'm like, well, what is the alternative? You could stay in the marsh house, but you don't want to do that because look what's in the marsh house. And he goes, this is what is in the marsh house. Wait, what? It looks like storm ship troopers. Wait, what the fuck is that? What the fuck is that? Apparently they bite and shit, dude. Bro, what the, how big is that? I mean, dude, look, it's like, it's the. What's that on? Go back. That's on the shoulder. That's your shoulder. It's about like. That thing's massive. That thing is fucking massive. It's like this much tall. Is it like that? No, I don't think it's quite that big. Smaller, just like the head. It's got to be smaller than that. Yeah, not this big. So, you know, I was like, all right, I do not want to sleep with that fucking thing. Wait, they're just in there? In the house, in the marsh house. So apparently the marsh guy is like. Why? They're not pets. They're just pests. I think, yeah, they're pests. They're like wandering around. He's like, we could sleep in the marsh house, but FYI, and I was like, fuck that. Let's camp. So you take this boat into the marshes and you camp on a fucking island and. These are the marshes? Dude, it was even. These are, but it was like even more remote than that. And this is, I think, this can't be current. This is maybe like back in the day. I don't actually know. Maybe. What do you got? But do you know, so. I guess I can show you down here too. What the fuck? Anyway, so we're camping out. Yeah. The marsh, they're cooking for us and shit. So it's this little island that's like in the. But it's solid enough you can stand on it? Yeah, so. I'll show you real quick. So we're taking this like little boat into these marshes and then camping. And, you know, you're in the middle of the desert, so it's kind of like unique. Wow, what. It's not an ocean. It's just a. No, it's a marshland, just a wetland. There's all these fucking water buffalo. Wow. And these people have lived here forever. On the marshes. Yeah. And here's like a. That's gorgeous. Yeah, right? Really pretty. It's fucking random water buffalo just standing there. Nice reflection. Yeah, right? So, you know, pretty cool. And. Yeah, like. So he's like, don't. You don't want to stay in the house. He's like, dude, you don't want to sleep in the house. We're camping. And I left some of my shit on land and like I had some shit stuck in my teeth and it was like really hurting. And I was like, I need floss so bad. I'm in a tent. I'm like, this fucking blows. Only the second time I've camped in my whole life. I'm like. This still sucks. That's so funny. As wild as you are. Like, I don't like camping though. Dude, it's hard. It's just. It's hard. Like I was. Me and Zach were basically. We're on each other. We're like touching. It's the tent's small. Sajad's sleeping outside. I'm like, dude, this is too ratchet. Like. But it was sick, obviously, in retrospect. Yeah. Oh, my God. Okay. So, you know, that's. That's so cool. So you stayed there the night? Stayed there the night. Cooked out? Cooked out. Started getting real as fuck with each other. This is in the video too. But Sajad starts being like, you know, man, like sometimes I like post online and like I want people to like me and like I want to post what people think will like about me. But I realized, bro, like I got to just be myself. Like. And when you're yourself, people like you. I'm like, dude, exactly. It's like as if we were fucking stoking up by the fire. It was so funny having this real ass conversation about social media. Wow. So insane. So, yeah. So this is like day two. Wow. Like crazy. And then Aya and Ahmed come to meet us the next day. We go to the. We go to this museum together. At the museum, they're like so stoked that we're at the museum that they like give us gifts and then they do this whole press thing with us. And then they post it everywhere. They're like, the American delegation is here visiting the hotel. Or sorry, visiting the museum. And we granted them gifts. All funny and fun. How'd you find any of these people? Aya and Ahmed were recommended. I went into like a Facebook group and I was like, who are some good Iraq guides? And like, they got recommended the most of anyone. I heard there's a pushback on ChatGPT now. Obviously, there's a pushback. But the pushback is, I actually don't want ChatGPT to give me a recommendation. I want people. So a lot of people are going to Reddit now to be like, I want a human who's seen something in an actual review instead of what this thing thinks I'll like. So that's like in regard to travel? This is recommendation. It's like, oh, these people in the Facebook group, this guy's good. Right, right, right, right, right. These guys ruled. Right. I mean, I don't. Doesn't ChatGPT also like get updated only every once in a while? Maybe. Right, exactly. And so it's like, that guy's dead. Maybe. But also, it's just like, I don't want like an amalgam. I want to know what people liked and didn't like specifically, and I can go in from there. Dude, totally. And that is like so important when it comes to this. Tell him Nancy sent you. And then he's like, Nancy called. Oh, I love Nancy. Tell her I said hi. It's like, all right, this is what I actually want. A hundred percent. And not only that, but you want to know how Nancy fared like two weeks ago. Right, right, right, right. You don't need like a six-month. Six-month-ago recommendation. Yeah. Because sometimes in these places, things change. Ever since his wife was executed, he's been different. Exactly, exactly. Yeah, it's like, oh, okay. Chat is not up to date on that. ChatGPT also lies. ChatGPT lies. Me and Colm, we were in the condo in Denver. You and Colm? Yeah. And we were like, I had some little of those lollipop lamb chops. We were like, let's make these. And then he just saw some whatever leftover spices and oils were from the last 50 people that stayed there. And he goes, ChatGPT, and he takes a little video. But this is what I have. Can you make me some sort of dipping sauce? That's crazy. Marinate. And they go, yeah. And they do this, take this. It was bad. It was really not good. And we had to like, after like four bites, like, I don't know. And then I had four bites in. We're like, this kind of blows, right? Like, yeah, it kind of sucks. Yeah. Dude, it doesn't surprise me. Chat's a people pleaser, dude. Yeah. Okay, so, yeah. So, we go to this museum. This is in Nazarea. Which is where Ur is. And a couple of these other things. This is supposed to be crazy. Because it really does, like, date back civilizations. Dude, yeah. Like, as ancient as you can imagine. Like, truly, like, as far as civilization is concerned. Yeah, fuck Greece. It's here. There was, like, nomadic people. But, yeah, it predates Greece. Like, ancient Greece. Like, all that stuff. Like, pretty sick. And then, yeah. My buddy just made a video, Zane, about all these nomadic. It was in, maybe, Kyrgyzstan. But, the World Nomadic Games. Oh, cool. Yeah, and it's just all those people that are like, well, I've been riding, shooting arrows off horseback for fucking 800 years. So, we just know how to do this. Dude, or, like, the birds and shit. Hunting with, like, birds. Yeah, for sure. They had that. They had all the fucking. Yep. And they had. We saw nothing. Yeah, all the fucking weird shit. So, wrestling, horseback wrestling. You got to get a guy off the fucking, pick up a goat, carcass. Yeah, that's Booskachi. That's, like, an Afghanistan thing. Really? Yeah, it's called Booskachi. No world, no medicate. It's got to be all the same region. Yeah, it sounds like Mongolia or Kyrgyzstan type of thing where people, or only those places. They have those big, great plains. Yeah. And shit. Sick, dude. Okay, so go ahead. I'm going to check that out. Yeah. So, eventually, Sajad hands us off to Aya and Ahmed, who took over for us for the rest of the time. And had a great time with them. We went to Babylon, which, you know, is, so Saddam did something cool. was destroyed saddam rebuilt it to what it would look like so it's there looking like what it would have looked like so this is this is googleable oh this is cool this is the yeah this is him this is beautiful yeah he's just he's a fucking weirdo he's fun i love it anyway so he built up what yeah babylon look up uh babylon babylon iraq on what so on where like so there's a there's almost like a gradient where you can tell where the original foundation stones are and where the new ones are because he literally rebuilt babylon so bottom or top left there this yeah that's part of it like this is was what it was this is what it looked like and he rebuilt it to look he built all these towers here this stuff on the side is definitely rebuilt the stuff in the middle unclear what the deal is with that uh but yeah so we were and then that arch uh he would build stuff like that i forget the original arch might be in babylon ruins re-opening iraq controversy yeah yeah it's weird people want shit done the way it was they want it left alone but if it was still in use like the empire stable didn't just get decrepit they fix it up totally i fully support this move personally yeah you're not changing it to fucking kanye's house right you're like exactly guys i'm fixing up the fucking broken pipes 100 100 uh so he yeah he rebuilt it and it looks like what it would have looked like the ancient city wow which is like this fortress like it's amazing super cool um and on the hilltop is saddam's palace saddam's summer house and you can see that right there where bottom left saddam's palace and old town to the right of that right there that i believe that's it and it's on on the hill so no and even the one next to it gives a better shot that one right up there bro this fucking thing is crazy it's like huge like these like that's saddam's palace that's where everybody went for the uso shows they all went to that bro this is that what they're talking about he has like seven of them dude this is just like a random summer house classic strongman grafted corruption dude like can i just say i've just figured out right now that saddam hussein ruled i only knew him as this fucking villain but what a baller dude seven mansions just a dog probably more than that and not even a man that's not even a regular mansion that's all that's a palace and dude this shit is like so ugly though there's not a there's not a ton of stuff still in there they there's a lot of graffiti and shit but like there's some areas that are not just available to anybody and if you like juice the guy he'll take you upstairs bribe culture a deal a little bit uh so and dude there are these like dining halls that are like unlike anything i've ever seen like massive and like the pool is massive it is sick this is also in the video too if you guys want to see it okay uh go to the video yeah places you can go the video actually it's it's it's a quick little segment so i would say go just yeah do that for a second god sounds like a fuck okay it's right here it's right here so i think it's after this right after this section so this is like the maze thing i was telling you about keep going and there's saddam's palace right there this is summer house wow look at this shit dude oh crazy right like that's opulence big time dude just like side like and now people are they like fuck this guy yeah they are but bro like look at that look at that room that's a crazy ass fucking room to throw a party in wow you can skateboard through it right this is like a birthday song oh i think that the other video is playing too what i think the kazakhstan video is playing too yep yep so anyway this is the but that's one of the pools so do the people there go hey i'm sure we could use the museum but fuck that guy forever or are they like do they are there some reverential people to them controversial it's one of those things where it depends who you talk to some people have been like you know when he was there there wasn't any of this bullshit that happened after with the power vacuum and secretarian violence so there's people who like favorably look back on it other people who are like fuck that guy and it's one of those kind of things i love these two how the people where was i columbia who was their guy uh narcos is all about him oh yeah fucking pablo escobar yeah looked on pretty wildly different and then his old um prison where he was that he made into something nice you can go there there's a couple hikes to start right there but you can go there it's like an old age home now and there's signs everywhere like this guy's a piece of shit don't take pictures of this and don't leave your fucking house trash there's old people here crazy the guy you're visiting sucks by the way crazy yeah it was like oh dark tourism yeah like yeah he built yeah and then other people and then there's guys that were in his group will take pictures with you they're still there like i'll put it down to your head i've heard about this and the guy's like yeah i killed like a hundred people dude they all forgave it crazy yeah and then but then the other areas they sell pablo merch yeah mao yeah huge and huge in china and they're like didn't you kill like millions of your own yeah i don't know i don't sell merch but yeah dude crazy so if you know quince for their cashmere and elevated essentials you might not know that they also have luggage that earned them a serious following guys they're great there's a reason quince luggage keeps selling out it's obsessively engineered with durable polycarbonate shells smooth 360 degree spinner wheels that you can push in the airport and let down those gentle ramps where you just let it go and see where it goes kind of go i set you free yeah you need those spinner wheels and quince has the best ones and a built-in compression system so you can pack more stress less and focus on where 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fucking take this home with me and there must have been like thousands of these on this chandelier because that's not that like isn't that cool but this it's crazy yeah what a different fucking vibe sick souvenir look at that thing there was a few and i was like oh i didn't just take it but i was like oh is there are those like the original thing that goes yeah yeah here take it i was like okay cool and it was in the area where like you can't really go in but like there was a couple other people up there if you just like knew the guy type of deal i love a souvenir like that yeah souvenir um i actually don't even want them if i can buy them you know i mean yeah right right right crazy thing like this dude rolf wrote a book about souvenirs and how interesting it is that like the history of them in general interesting and how like you'd rather get outside the eiffel tower i went to the eiffel tower shirt made in like indonesia right right then if you got home and ordered one from indonesia like nah totally totally like there's got to be a link to it and then the different types which is like natural like a rock somewhere or a reed like that yeah this is the marshes though wow yeah if you could pull a piece of that out like that's a cooler souvenir than like totally totally totally totally totally um how cold was it of this stuff uh bundled and it's not even night yet we were a little chilly at night this is the fall it's obviously hot as balls there in the summer okay and we get pretty hot during fall but it was the nice time of year so it'd be like hot but then it would be cool at night it's sort of the vibe yeah um pretty cool um so yeah dude then you know saddam's palace uh babylon and then we went to this place called karbala which is like the third holiest site in shia islam okay and people do pilgrimages there and the place is unlike anything i've ever seen it's like this mass and like everybody's there it's so packed and people are going there to and it's like clean there's like 100 people cleaning it constantly they're there what is it you should get pictures of this yeah that that's in there too if you actually know actually i have good ones on the phone here okay cleaning it because it's holy what happened there yeah so like uh one of the shia like people is buried there like one of the the famous one i forget i'll leave that green stuff yeah this is all part of it all part of the shrine and that's in the background wow modern cool how cool is that dude uh by the way this is what this all through like the buddhists and hindu areas they they doll it up like that in myanmar everywhere else uh indonesia and it's like why it's like because if they had this technology then they would have been like let's honor our god with this cool shit i was into it i loved it uh wow yeah and this was like not even the busy time of year there's this there's this time of the year where time lapse uh yeah we did like a time lapse but yeah this looks like inside it's like crazy who's buried there or who imam hussein i want to say uh who's like one of the yeah dude oh my crazy what there's this weird rule where you can't film but you can film on your phone it's like okay so what yeah they're like no cameras but like your phone's fine that's how high up does that go weird loophole wait play that again yeah i'm sorry this is you know i gotta see that roof yeah alabas holy shrine how how far up does this go i don't think it's it's like an infinity room but it's cool wow here's another shot of it all but dude it's unlike anything i've ever seen and there's just a bit this is late at night too it's like packed people just people being religious or just hanging so they go into the shrine and they like kiss it and they're like crying it's like a really intense i have a it's beautiful gorgeous like super cool yeah this is oh my god it's like a fucking yayo infinity room and in there everybody's like kissing the thing and they're like oh crying and fucking it's pretty wild oh you know it'd be great right there if you just came up and serve somebody dance moves let him fucking respond honor him bro fucking serve me back yeah dude uh people going in praying and anyway what's it's it's muslim right yeah shia shia it's a type of muslim yeah sunni shia for everybody listening forgive me for like not knowing more specifically like don't take offense to this but this pod is about not knowing okay so people like you didn't get anything right like yep none of us here are experts we just went to a place so this is the way that i to probably oversimplifying sunni islam is like quote more traditional the muhammad is the person who is worshipped and it's like there's muhammad and sort of that's like the deal it's like simple in shia they worship people who were related to muhammad and i think that sunni people don't believe in they're like that's evil though there's something like this in christianity we're like what do you mean you're praying to the god saint anthony to the to the saint anthony to find your shit you don't pray he just was talking to god talk to god what are you doing kind of yeah i think it's that i think it's like muhammad's the only guy in sunni shia there's more more people that are okay i guess um again sorry for the oversimplification but so two of these really famous places are in iraq so karbala and najaf i think najaf is even more holy than karbala if you had to rank them we did not go there when i go back i'm going to and they told us that they could give us a permit because they took us in the back they're bragging they're giving us saffron tea just fucking delicious by the way they're like we'll get you a permit and then they didn't but now that i know what i need to do which is back to this paradox where it's like i don't want to over prepare but if you're under prepared i could have gotten permits to do shit there is that that's a lot of time that's tough i want to be because i don't know how you are if i over repair in a light country like in a normal place you know um then i'm like stuck to these reservations i made but i wanted to be like what do you feel like today like oh let's go by frida's house and you go like yeah you need to like two weeks ago you make reservations like fuck yeah yeah yeah yeah dude totally totally exactly that so it was still amazing there was some 15 year old kid like doing a sermon hot i mean he you know it depends i i he was charismatic okay you know that he had that going on he was charismatic and he's just running the show and apparently like some of these people believe they are special and this kid was fully drinking the kool-aid and he's killing it this is also if you i'm in the people listening like in the carbola segment you see this kid he's just ripping it he's like the man he's like everybody's like oh um and anyway uh so it was really cool to see this like giant it was like las vegas and like our hotel room had like five beds in it because it's like you bring your whole fucking family here and during this one famous time of year you march this long road and everything's free along the road for everyone food you stay and then like you make this journey to carbola and an odd job it's like a pilgrimage thing how far is that i don't know i think it's kind of far and then days uh like potentially yeah i think you like sleep along the road and these like different places that are set up a pilgrimage it's like a proper and they do it all the time every year i forget what it's called but like it looks sick it looks so cool they have those doing these dances like like yeah cool cool you got video of that no you didn't i didn't do that but it's a time of year yeah i've seen videos of it and it's sick it's like there's all these pilgrimage hikes so so like uh coming to santiago is one you know like i don't know who you're following in like from from france oh yeah yeah that long long one but then like my buddy told me he did one in from like nazareth to bethlehem or something like that or to jerusalem cool and it's this mixture same thing it was like jesus walked here or one of his one of his like you know fucking homies uh did and so it's a mixture of very religious people that are like i want to walk in the in the footsteps of like mark or john or something and then also like dirtbag backpackers they're like it's cool three-day hike let's smoke weed totally totally totally that's sick that sounds very fun pilgrimage yeah dude um so that was that was pretty cool um do you feel like spiritual when you're in a when you're in these places i think i really like this kind of shit i'm realizing like religious big like important religious things i'm into like i think it's really cool typically so yes is the answer yeah it's like greater than us it's not like a statue that some king made or some like ruler made it to like it's like this means something yeah yeah and so the other thing big ben is cool but like yeah yeah i know i mean i'm trying my best not to be cynical about it but i'm trying to i still think i get it from big ben like i get it the first time i see a thing that i know about but i but i feel you like it's cool to kind of made up importance big ben is the kardashians it has no importance on its own it's only important because it's been important interesting you know i mean does that make sense you could potentially do that about a lot of stuff though if you wanted to but not yeah but i'm saying not religious like oh here's where jesus got washed like oh there's a reason this is a big stone didn't i didn't get what you yeah yeah a hundred percent um but yeah it's it's special um and i didn't know about it at all i'd never heard of it before i went so um yeah no one's heard of any of this it was incredible and dude the whole time dude it's chill as fuck the food's unbelievable it's like picture you know middle eastern food you know hummus meats whatever and just like a fuck ton of rice like delicious rice like pictures of that dance food pictures no i have some i can look some up i have some yeah i have like this like some shit like this dude oh like is that like fried noodles i don't even know i think this is right it's like rice and like there must be nuts on top and just dude but it's fucking delicious oh look at all those dippings before yeah like everything and like people are pretty stout there there's like they're like thick yeah of those two soldiers one looked like he was eating the other was like i borrowed this jersey from my dad there's big guys uh and yeah dude so and the vibe is the vibes are elite the whole time everybody's cool and in a place like carbala it's like every woman is wearing the thing you know i mean they are so this is the big debunk you had last time where it's like people aren't really wearing the hijab so it's it's so the difference is you don't have to do it in iraq and as you saw the girl she was just dressed normal which was it wasn't always wasn't always common but like no it's all good uh anybody can kind of dress however they want but in the holy areas you you're supposed to and she hated it she's like i fucking hate wearing this thing and she wore and was like whatever disgruntled about it she's she was raised muslim yeah it's so funny the people that get mad at their own religion and they're like i don't know what to do with it i don't know what to do with it i don't know what to do with it i don't know what to do with it you know i mean like if you're in some snake charmer village you'll be like sure what do i do here i'll just like go like this 10 times i'll do it but then if it's like jewish i'm like i don't do that anymore totally when it's your own thing you're sick of it yeah i think about that sometimes i'm a fraud yeah i'll take my shoes off to go to a fucking buddhist monastery i don't care dude exactly yeah totally um so there was that and you know fraud yeah there there's all these like uh like drawings and paintings of these like women wearing these things and they're like they're like they're like these things and it's an intimidating image like in the west when you see someone dressed like that it means a place that's like scary at least since 9-11 up until maybe like recently that image was sort of like used in that way like anytime you saw those people in a tv show it means that like people were entering a bad situation so they show these women dressed like this but like right these images it's mothers they're like crying over children they lost and like that image is like the image of like a mother there so it doesn't like represent what like people in the west think of when they start seeing people that look like that walking around right and whether the face is fully covered or not just with the thing over the head yeah um and i forgot the burka i think is full and the hijab is just over the head but not the face if i'm not mistaken um but dude like same shit like we're walking around these markets and we're seeing women dressed like that who were like hey can you take a picture of me and they're like yeah so i'm posing for pictures with all these women and they're like can i see how i look in it so they can pose okay cool yeah and i have a real a really great shot of that too uh in the video when we're walking around this fish market like this lady's like oh take a picture take a picture like she's like i want to be famous like take a picture this is really sweet dude show her picture yeah yeah i feel like private like promoting it though i definitely have she wants me it's all you want to be oh yeah i'll show it for sure uh that's my girl dude she loved it she was fucking eating it up look at her cheesing wow that's my girl dude uh yeah so anyway and then like you know we go into the umbro store where they sell the iraqi national team like soccer jersey and shorts and like the girl there is just dressed like mad normal she's like flirting with me and shit and the guy was like i think she liked you i was like yeah you know your guide yeah the guy was like no no the guy didn't like me the guy's like i think the girl in the store liked you can people uh yeah i know i know people uh can they like fuck like not really so like for example if you have a girlfriend you're like if you were to like live with them that's like not a good look like your parents would look down on that even if your parents are like mad cool but like if you were single and that girl sounds like she was like oh hey would you have like let's go out or do you go what are you doing later come back to my place i don't know if you if you could pull off the ladder maybe there's a way to i could not pull it off we're just like can someone who can pull those things off pull that off i don't know i'm not sure um maybe but it's a pretty innocent culture when it comes to that stuff and even the ayah and ahmed they were like we got married because like it would have been it wasn't like cool for our parents weren't cool with us living together and their parents are like cool i went to ahmed's parents house and he's chill with his grandparents and his parents and they were like the nicest chillest people like it was amazing but still it's like no no you shouldn't be doing that so they're young they got married um but dude so what would happen a lot is some of the most innocent interactions i've ever seen so we get pulled over at a checkpoint ayah the girl is dressed normal and the iraqi soldiers aren't always used to that so they're like where are you guys from and they're like well they're from america they're like let's see their passports whatever and then they're like where are you from and she's like oh i'm from iraq they're like you're from iraq and she'd be like what you don't think we have pretty girls in iraq and every time they'd be like i don't know they got all bashful and shit dude wow that's how that's how not flirty they are it's like childish as like i don't know it was wild dude it was wild um and then the the like maze thing that we were looking at before babylon so it's like probably five feet to the bottom of that and the sometimes the the gap is like this so you can step over it easily but if you have anything about heights at all you might hesitate you might be like yeah before you take the step okay i is doing that she's deliberating what how she's new some guy yells he's like you can use me as the bridge to get over the the gap that guy got in so much trouble for doing that but like in the cutest way again a police officer saw it he goes over he grabs him by the ear by the ear and pulls him over and makes him apologize to her what and he goes i'm sorry and he's like good you learned your lesson today i felt like i was at recess dude oh yeah like that was like a cat call it's the mildest cat call i've ever seen you can use me as the bridge to get it was he was offering utility i mean yeah yeah it wasn't even like i'll be your tampon he didn't say nice ass yeah he's like walk on my back that's the king of england i'll be your tampon dude that's do you ever see his love letters to camilla he said that he goes i want to be your tampon what a line i know and it seems terrible but also like baller sex that's a line yeah yeah fuck yeah i want to soak up your period blood that's how much i'm into you like oh that's how much i love you all right i'll fuck you what a dog what a dog fuck yeah king england so yeah dude those are kind of the vibes um and then i yeah i gotta get back to the prank okay so this prank so the soldiers would fuck with you they'd be like hey they'd stop you these guys are armed you saw the gun that guy had he's like passport with the little shoulder exactly with the shoulder thing and i'm like oh sorry like did i do something i show my passport he flips open and starts like confirming that it's me like very aggressively kind of for a while and i'm like is everything all right then he's like i'm just fucking with you i'm like are you sure he's like yes welcome in iraq like over and over and over welcome in iraq they don't quite know the yeah not quite good with prepositions but hey i don't only i only speak one language welcome in iraq yeah and then the guy yeah it makes more sense welcome to iraq no welcome to be in iraq right right agreed fully makes sense uh and then the guides ayah and ahmed fucked with me really bad this is probably the craziest prank anyone's played on me it was the day before we were supposed to go home like hey you need to take a covid test to leave the country it's like 2022 2021 november 2021 yeah they were doing that shit and they're like it's bullshit like it's you know the government's like raising money like it's it'll be over it'll be fine uh but we'll just do it and then tomorrow we'll pick you up we'll hang out and then we'll bring you to the airport i'm like great next day they show up to pick me up wearing masks and i'd never i haven't seen a person wear masks the whole time i've been there so i'm like is everything all right they're like sorry like you failed your covid test i'm like what they're like yeah they're like uh i'm like well can we just fucking pay somebody off and they're like no they're like so i'm like what happens next and they go well a government escort's going to show up in a second and take you to like the northern most part of the country which like just sounds intimidating doesn't necessarily mean anything yeah but sounds pretty terrible sounds pretty terrible they're like you're gonna have to quarantine by yourself for 15 days and you have to pay for it too i'm sorry um and then you'll test again if you're like the southernmost part of new york city you're like oh no like what fight i oh that's right yeah it sounds intimidating and then they're like you might fail the test like a lot of times people fail to quarantine yeah and then they're like you'll have to stay another 15 if you fail days so 30 days they're like is likely and i'm like what the fuck and ahmed starts going yeah dude like i haven't been feeling good either like we have a big group coming like if i test positive i'm fucked he's like i have the cuff i'm like oh my god i'm sorry and zach zach is is negative so we're debating i'm like dude you should go back like obviously don't wait for me like this sucks but i'll deal with it and then we're sitting there for like a half an hour like going back and forth about this and i'm freaking out and then they're like haha it's a prank haha bro you should have seen your face i have the whole thing in in the video also i thought they filmed me the whole time uh and i'm like are you guys serious that is so fucked up like as a comedian i appreciate it yeah at the time i was like what the fuck i'm loving this are you fucking kidding me what yeah savage savage prank uh i was in french polynesia and somebody it was around that time too and it was like you gotta take a test before you get there and right when you land like to get on the plane and then when you land like all right cool you're good go through and then on the way back you're like i need one within a couple days before and then at the airport some guy two different people unrelated failed and like you gotta stay and he goes i got home i gotta get meetings and stuff like we're so far past there's no negotiation here i whatever you think you have to get home for so does everyone who tests positive damn so you can't go uh your family can stay with you but they'll have to also quarantine and they're like can we go like yeah he's like you guys should go i'm like yeah we know we're obviously going oh my god but there was somebody else but also you gotta stay in french polynesia which is so expensive oh yeah so it's like you gotta stay on your own dime and then there was another guy who tests a positive they're like you guys can share a place if you want and they're like my name's bill oh and they did that's what they did do that cut the price in half like oh yeah okay wow dude what the fuck yeah they take you to a place like we'll pick you up and you're like oh my god i'm gonna go to pick you up in two weeks nightmare nightmare i mean in greece to stay with somebody i'd be like it'd have to be how much more is it to be myself oh fuck that sucks i'm looking at you go like ah that's are you an early riser yeah turn your fucking phone you talk when i'm like on the phone brutal i remember in greece they would let you take it when you landed and they'd lie about the day you took it so that you could like be good i was like i was like you guys rule greece rules yeah bringing down the eu one one one bribe at a time wow so anyway they got me good there okay um but yeah dude can you drink the water in iraq no no i you shouldn't drink the water anywhere to be honest in a way i mean america's all right america's typically all right except the pipes here are so fucking shitty landlord it's like oh the water itself but it's come through our pipes i haven't replaced in 20 years yeah even though i'm legally obligated so that's gonna get you bad you know my advice if you're traveling anywhere besides japan or western europe don't drink the water be careful because i've gotten sick a million times didn't get sick in this trip though did not did not congratulations thank you which is even contributed even more to how amazing of a trip it was how long were you there for i think seven nights wow and dude aya this girl i mean she was so cool she has like the craziest life so she lit she lived in uh mosul and then isis fucking that was like the capital of isis like raka and uh mosul these are like the isis where there was like their own currency the flags flying so she had to like leave isis leave the isis territory and then like move to syria and then the syria thing started right when she moved there so like everywhere she's gone in her life like the most significant conflict of the time has followed her around and like here she is living her life like crushing it like she's wild dude it must be so when you know that your line is here what you're capable of and then it goes up to there you're like oh my god even if you're like what i know there's a scene in a sleepwalk with me i haven't watched it you remember who's the guy right what mike yeah and he's like got a booking it's his first like road booking as a comic and he's a la quinta and like oh we have a look and he's jumping up on the bed yeah i'm like oh yeah yeah well you didn't think it was possible to have a room paid for yeah la quinta was pretty fucking nice totally yeah and it's and it's a good lesson because you know a month later it's not good enough right and i think that that never ends you know i don't think there's ever a time where you are you said like if you settle in and you still are like so sick you know what i mean so it's just important to be grateful yeah um but you should do this trip guys it sounds like i want to and last time i was on the show i was like afghanistan not for everybody iraq for everybody you you should have the guides but it's not that expensive and they it's asia technically yeah and they hold your they hold your hand like they'll be with you 24 hours like they drop you off the hotel at night pick you up in the morning and take you around if they're like hey i'm gonna go out on a walk by myself or they're like sure go or like don't uh you fully could and and this is like travel communities everybody prides themselves on spending as little money as possible and not having guides yeah which i mean we talked about last time not for me i'd rather have somebody it really is depends on the time where what it is yeah like in paris i don't want to i just kind of want to walk and come upon a cafe and be fine yeah yeah yeah agree but then i'm like would you miss all the history i'm like yeah i'm not really looking for the history i'm looking to to be you know i don't need a guy for the beach and the beauty of this of this is that like in paris how expensive that person is going to be you're like fuck that for this it's it's leaning expensive but with how much you're getting yeah i think it's maybe 200 bucks a person for the whole day every day you know what i mean right which isn't bad and meals and hotels are included in that wow what were the bathrooms like there in iraq solid good enough regular toilets regular in all the hotels no squatty potty situation even with stuff you came across uh maybe in stuff we came across but like there was not a single hotel that didn't have a toilet and almost all of them the shower was separate from the toilet area sometimes in these places the shower the floor of the shower and the floor of where you sit on the toilet is the same it's pretty gross because then you get that water just you're stepping in the way you're shitting like what is this it's gross just piss and there's like these gross sandals on the outside that you're supposed to wear and it's like these are disgusting you're supposed to wear them and they're disgusting too yeah it's like you won't get like rabies from the water but don't get athlete's foot right oh yeah you're right yeah you're not even like oh yeah i guess what are you talking about um iraq how'd you fly there uh qatar air so through qatar and then into basra and then out of where's qatar abu dhabi no egypt no so like see saudi like northeast yeah above uae that little red speck oh abu dhabi so right above abu dhabi oh that red speck okay yeah yeah yeah i think it's either that or that okay uh yeah actually i think it's it might be the one on the top the point no no no it's here so um looks like a general award speaking from experience that looks like a lot like a general yeah qatar air super nice uh the airports the bazaar airport's really small the baghdad airport's fine security is intense as you would imagine but not as crazy as the airport is uh the airport's really small the Kabul airport much nicer than the Kabul airport is there police or just military yeah it's sort of like one in the same type of thing but there are militia controlled areas and they are less less cool like I was saying and that sort of tends to be in the north I don't know what the current situation is with that but I want to go back and I want to go to northern Iraq and Kurdistan so I want to go to Mosul and I want to go to I mean it's so hard to remember this but it's like if you come to New York like oh what was New York like like where'd you go the Bronx is going to be way different than Manhattan or Brooklyn oh yeah totally like oh the Brooklyn's the vibe or Manhattan is the vibe it's a like right so like northern region and southern region like that's a different thing yeah totally and Vietnam too I never got to the north but like that's the French influence right right right right right and you're like oh and yeah it's so easy to oversimplify things and group things and what I typically find is like everywhere's always different but if you take a step to the right yeah it'll have some elements of where you were to the left but some new ones as well and then you take another step to the right and you have the same thing and by the time you take enough steps to the right it's completely different than where you started but it happens gradually so it's like kind of the same but different and even in America it's like every place does something well yeah tostadas are in like Guatemala they're also in Chiapas right and then they become less and less available and then whatever right and then it's just yeah and then it's like and then it becomes like a burrito is like oh there's some Mexican I moved here this is not at all it's like oh there's some Mexican I moved here this is not at all it's like oh there's some Mexican I moved here this is done here right right right right it's like we have Italian food but that's no that's not in Italy oh totally and like even in Italy it's like this is only here but Italy especially I mean Italy wasn't even unified as Madrid and not Barcelona right but now it's like we know how to make it now obviously but like it's so good yeah when does it become like a different I know so it always anytime I'm like oh I'm like trying to figure out what I'll do when I go to a place it becomes so obvious once I get there I'm like oh like why was I there I'm like oh I'm like oh I'm not having enough stuff to cover the ceviches of like Ecuador Peru and how they're different ceviches just like slightly like thicker totally milkier totally dude um so yeah um pretty dude yeah it's just such a great Manhattan's different because it's like two minutes you're in a different neighborhood if you're walking high or on mushrooms you're just like whoa new world whoa new world yeah three blocks you totally third to like Astor place to like Avenue A is like different people totally totally um it's probably maybe the most extreme example of that just how dense at least in the western world how dense it is yeah um but yeah man I mean Iraq truly it's it was just so damn that's so cool it was so sick man like truly special like best I would say best trip I've probably been on all things considered who told you not to go there who told you to go there everybody told me not to if I had bumped into you you would have told you to go you're the only person who said go I appreciate that to this day I love it so much like what are you talking about yeah everyone and everyone said don't except for people who had done it and we're like oh you're gonna have the best time and I was just thought it was such a weird juxtaposition that people were like oh yeah like have the best time and I was like that's it like yeah what do you mean like have the best time now if you want to go solo dolo this is this is the important thing so if you go to Baghdad by yourself and you want to stay in Baghdad you're good you'll have you can go around do all the stuff there's so much cool shit so many insane sick Saddam era monuments buildings that were kind of projects that were abandoned like a lot of good stuff there right but if you want to go from Baghdad to Nazaria you have to like go through checkpoints and what will end up happening is you encounter some guy who's like who the fuck are you and you're like oh I'm a tourist like what like we don't have tourists and they're like what and then then there's like a problem because they're like well who are you staying with where are you staying here for a sec you want some tea sure uh yeah you're good uh we'll figure it out it takes like five hours and then they're like oh you're good you can go I guess like if you can get to that point or you call a guy somehow and you don't have to deal with that shit right so that's where it's like not an easy trip but it becomes an easy trip when you have the company taking you around yeah it's me and my brother went to Petra from a lot and it was like how did we do that we could do it on our own but like the bridge they get the stamps passed like whatever they're gonna bus all day and I'm like hey fuck off I'll see you at four we're gonna go do our own thing I don't care about the aqueducts totally um and then you get back but it's like they can get you through they get you like access to things you just couldn't get yes yes yes yes um yeah Petra man fucking unbelievable you went there so so it really is unbelievable like much more than than I thought it could be you know there's a few places where you're like I'm sure it'll just be this and then you're like oh no no there's a reason it's like the Grand Canyon where you're like yeah you're gonna keep going like oh my god yeah and Petra too it's like you come through that crevice where like yeah the Indiana Jones crevice yeah and you see somebody like oh they're there and the whole thing is there you could like wander around for the whole day and not come close to seeing a little holes that you can go into yeah so cool um so what's next for you this is what I mean I always talk about this what's next for you so I just did a thing in Nepal and Bhutan and I just got some Bhutan money that's the one uh the blue one I have that one really yeah the the king is on a bunch of them too that guy is the goat dude the king of Bhutan um so cool so cool looking uh but I I did a thing where I was curious about what it would be like to live with Buddhist monks so I did it uh in like remote monasteries in the mountains so I did it in Nepal and then in Bhutan also and I filmed it and I fucking filmed the shit out of it it's gonna look amazing for another one what are these called again it's I mean it's not really you don't have a series not not really like places you can go I did places you can go iraq and afghanistan i don't know if i'm gonna call it that for this i might i kind of doesn't necessarily is that one where you need a i mean we'll let's do another episode about it i guess but like is that one where you need a um the visa is like super expensive per day yeah bhutan's 100 bucks a day but which means backpackers just will not be going dude it's it is the most well-oiled tourist experience i've ever seen chaperone yep yeah but it's not like a north korea chaperone i heard they just don't want you to see everything i don't know i don't know that could be true maybe i just you know but it didn't feel that way to me it was like really pure also out of my mouth i'm just realizing like there's someplace like i actually don't want to see the suffering parts actually please do hide that from me interesting right please don't take me to avenue d if you're showing me around new york i just actually i don't need to know that's there yeah it didn't feel that way to me okay um and it was tough to figure out the the monastery thing for bhutan but after weeks of trying i finally got one they would let me go and hang and don't you have to it's just aren't they like i want to do vipassana so go there and say vipassana they go all right come work for me i don't know maybe i don't know i didn't uh but for nepal so it's funny like the two trips together perfectly blend into everything i wanted in nepal they let me like participate in all the prayers and dress like a monk and shit and like film inside the monasteries and do all the stuff so that was sick uh sort of in the middle of nowhere and then bhutan i had like this conversation with this guy who's like kind of like magical as well as just being a llama and he was like telling me shit about myself that was like how the fuck do you know that yeah it was like kind of nuts i'd fully drank the kool-aid and then i was like well how do i become this and this and this and we like talked at length by the way this guy has betel nut root in his mouth his teeth are all red he's boozing like he was a man legend we drank together and then he's like spitting blood all the time dude yeah exactly it's great you see the streets like somewhere everywhere here you're like nah it's just dirt bags yeah and i was like well what i do he's like dude just buy this thing for me he's like every problem you have will go away within three years just put it somewhere on a mantelpiece that has like special grains and herbs in it 30 bucks i was like done done it's worth it the risk is worth it worth it uh and at 10 grand you're like i don't know if i believe you i'll take a chance yeah so i got that at home uh and the next trip i'm doing so i'm going to go to i'm i'm trying to make one video a month so i did one in qatar too on that trip so i shot three separate videos then i'm going to africa in a couple months i'm going to tanzania tanzania comoros which is here that's a country yeah wow archipelago situation and i'm also going back to rwanda and you've never been to tanzania no my dad went there that's where what's the mountain there kilimanjaro kilimanjaro which now has full wi-fi on the whole mountain it's like is that good yeah really yeah uh yeah apparently like they have their shit figured out but i'm staying in a village in tanzania that should be sick i'm planning to go to a wedding in comoros which will be really fucking cool uh and then rwanda i'm just hanging out with the comedians i met the for the first video i ever made checking back in with them it's so cool to be able to go meet comics because they're like oh hey you're an american comic we all relate in the comedy level dude i'm like oh are you allowed to say you know an f-bomb there are you not okay cool we can like oh cool we can do that here we can't and but then like and then it's like where's the cool bar or what's 100 it's the same yeah if you don't like remember you're in rwanda you feel like you're just at a fucking and there's the guy who's the hater who's like that guy's a hack like he just posts a lot he bought followers like they're saying all that shit wow they're being racist to each other but then all that's happening and then they go hey before you leave you need to go to the genocide museum like picture the most cynical comic you've ever met saying that to you wow you know what i mean i would never say that to anybody but i would as a joke so check out the holocaust memorial before you go i just want to ruin your trip uh so yeah dude that's like that's next that's next and uh then i want to go back to iraq um hopefully the end of the year maybe syria syria be cool too and just keep ripping it and yeah dude the shit that we're making is just looking rolf went there there's a i have a syria episode recently a couple months ago oh cool by that guy who wrote that book vagabond's way and fuck yeah whatever but he was like but he's when he was like 20 but you go up to the mountains it's your vibe and you stay in this monastery oh and that's where they speak yeah and then it's like it's like i'll just live here for like a week do a little bit of work you know or a few days whatever and that's when he told me that one guy was like i'm not doing this like this isn't christianity lady fucking chill out just do it they're letting us do this let's stay here for free wow just do the thing just do it's 10 seconds fine just do it yeah yeah dude totally uh but yeah i mean i obviously love this shit and uh you know i appreciated the last time i came on people really saying all a bunch of nice stuff about all the videos as the listeners went over to your stuff big time and they were really appreciative of it in a way that was very validating so i appreciate it yeah it's cool it's cool like you're taking us places that like we can't really get to and even get an honest i mean the the no hijabs thing or not as much as you think thing is so like eye-opening because like oh i've just been lied to yeah well yeah for afghanistan especially um as far as like the full cover-up sitch and in iraq yeah it's like people just look like just just normal i mean more so in the more urban cause cosmopolitan areas but it's nice to have somebody's like here's how it actually is like is jaywalking illegal in america like yeah but like right right it's everyone does it that's not a thing or like is weed illegal like what not for white people you know it's like what do you mean like oh it's just like inherent racism where they whatever it's like yeah let me tell you what it actually works it's nice to have someone there going like here's how it actually is dude totally and you know there was no indication of anything that was like super i i felt how dangerous iraq and but then you drive by and they're like oh yeah that's like a big prison like all the al-qaeda and isis guys are in there like sure but you're not that's the things like that doesn't affect me totally i want crime stats in new york i don't want gang i'm gonna take gang gang violence out of it and then just tell me can i walk home safely that's all i want to know with violence iraq you don't gotta worry at all and the company i use is called safrati s-a-f-r-a-t-y they may have rebranded i don't know but i the ayah ahmed they're in the video if you guys check it out and you can like look for instagram it was called i think they maybe they might have just rebranded it but it was called let me see let me see sorry i uh i turned my thing off sorry it's a fraud oh safari no no no no let me see if i can i'll look on her page tour oh no it's called n lil e-n-l-i-l dot travels that's the instagram uh but it'll probably come up hopefully yeah little travels iraq tours and little travels wow oh look that's the thing all right yeah yeah and that's a unesco there's a ton of cool unesco there but yeah bro this is like this is the trip guys today's episode of you be tripping is brought to you by n lil travels when you're looking to go uh to iraq and a little worried about how you're gonna get around look no farther than n lil they'll get you started uh from the arranging to the setting you up food make sure your diarrhea levels are low safety is number one priority for in little travels if you want to go to iraq come home alive look at this stupid couple they seem happy i want to be one of these stupid couples yeah and lil travels they'll get you hooked up just fine look at that blue thing in the middle right there that's like that monument is huge what is it the middle one i forget what it's called go over it won't saddam um saddam built it and now they're using it as like a shia martyrs museum so it's like semi-propaganda situation inside uh really but dude and they'll travel all you have to do is take care of the flight we'll take care of the rest for scale i'll show you reach out at booking at safaradi.info look uh for scale what is it this thing wow what is this like a clamshell it's just a giant plug that in something something what what is it is it a building in it or no so downstairs there is but and this is not a sideways one i don't think but it will still help maybe it goes sideways yeah but bro that thing is huge wow that's so you can't go in it like you can like go as up to it as far as you can and then like i'm saying there's no like windows so it doesn't go up but it goes down so there's stuff below it what the is it yeah i don't know it was like a monument there's like a bunch of like that around baghdad that's super you yeah zoom in oh my god you look so much younger there i guess four years yeah it looks like steven merchant looks real palsied out your friend wow what a trip pretty cool all right do you have any last piece of advice before we go yeah travel advice it's gonna be different every time yeah yeah i would say uh the thing that it's like in your wildest dreams where you're like i want to do that and then you think of reasons as to why you shouldn't ignore them because this happens to me all the time i have that thought process too and then one night i'll get hammered and then i'm like fuck i'm doing this dude and i'll start booking shit and then i wake up and i'm like i guess i'm going to fuck that's how i booked the rwanda trip at first i woke up with flights to rwanda i was like all right i'm going to rwanda this is how mushroom trips are yeah yeah you're like no i'm not doing i don't want to do it tonight and then two other people do it and you're like maybe a cabinet and you're like oh actually just give me a bunch and then you're like no i had a good time you just have to jump absolutely and what i took from that though is like when you're on mushrooms and the mushrooms are like you need to go on that trip oh that too that's who because you'll see it clearly like you're right mushrooms thank you for telling me when i'm very open to it now dude totally and you know it'll be like oh it's hard to get there and it's this and it's that and it's like that's another cool buddhism teaching it's like uh discomfort's temporary pain is temporary so embrace that and it makes things much more approachable which is very true and like you know i don't know like i went to easter island on my honeymoon which was like such a pain to ultimately get to and i was sitting there looking at the fucking moai and i was like this fucking rules like so it's all it's always worth it and people like well what if something happens i don't know yeah it's always what if something happens like i don't know man yeah what if you get killed in college well yeah then you shouldn't have gone to college i know what you're talking about what if something happens why are you even saying that is something gonna happen agreed it's like if something's unlikely then i'm i try to not let it scare me and uh a lot of us just talk same thing with the subway pushers everyone outside new york is like oh my god it's like dude no one that we know has even seen it i know and your guys from every other place like i would hate to go to new york like it's not a thing totally um and even so it's cool that my parents now i lied to my parents and then i called them and told them and now after they've seen everything like i'm going back to iraq they would be like cool what are your parents which is a win what are italian just straight italian both of them both from italy like and they are like scared they are like very cautious like don't go here don't go there but if i said i'm going to iraq they'd be like okay because they know because now they know so i feel proud that i've been able to like show people that there's a really cool iraq out there that you can go have a great time at so okay i'll do a travel advice too it's kind of based on yours a little bit but um my friend in uh alexandra would come into romania the booker and um he was like toying with going to thailand or not or maybe indonesia or kl maybe anyways like i don't know i don't know i don't know and then ben's like i think i might just get the ticket and then he did he goes i have to go now get the ticket get the ticket if you're in one moment of clarity we're like yeah i want to go don't wait later to get the ticket just right then get it and then you have to go totally it's sure you can delay and travel credit but probably you just have to go dude and by having the ticket like that's another thing it's like you can plan the trip in steps so it's like you get the ticket then you figure out i got my trip out there we'll see how long i'm gonna be there but i'm definitely going on june 23rd spend a little time figuring it out something like four days enough 20 days enough okay what can i do how many cities they go from there totally and like the flight even if it's long it's just half a day even if it's like 15 hours 18 hours whatever it's one day yeah and you get to be across the world like how cool is that yeah you know so do it dude yeah get in there there's ways of mitigating flights so if you're with somebody you're like let's have a fucking cribbage tournament on the way you know five hours of that i'll watch a couple videos i don't know try to sleep yeah write some write something totally totally man so uh even the stuff that wasn't worth it there's this mountain in guatemala where you go up you're right next to a volcano just keeps going off every like minute it just keeps going off yeah the hike is too straight up it's actually the air keeps getting thinner and thinner you never catch your breath and you're like oh my god i'm like oh my god i'm like oh my god it's not worth it but when you're up there it's bomb yeah you know and you're like i wouldn't go but like getting up there still this is awesome yeah totally so yeah it doesn't it's not it doesn't always feel good every step of the way sometimes yeah but but to get to iraq yeah man and it's fucking layover who cares you got to go to the fucking birthplace of civilization and you could literally go to you could go tomorrow because you don't have to fucking get a visa you get it when you get there i'm gonna look up one thing shit looking up flights yeah yeah do it do it uh new york to new york to baghdad baghdad there it is one way let's do round trip what is it like turkish airlines qatar emirates probably goes there 18 cheapest 1800 yeah cheapest we're down to 1400 not bad one stop 13 hours the little planning yeah a little planning yeah a little planning yeah a little planning yeah a little planning that's just right now for a month out oh for a month out yeah let's go okay here's a cheap time let's see this this will be the cheapest it is two oh that's two tickets hold on hold on one second okay 1200 not bad not bad 1200 round trip dude royal in royal what what does it say jordanian airlines good good good uh good they got good snacks royal jordanian dude um yeah i'm gonna go now that's on my list now you should do it bro that's on my list text me let me know okay you know how it is yeah we should also have like uh we'll wrap this we're done now but like we should have like a way to like like turner's like i'm going to camp uh croatia i wanted that i'm like off air i have some recommendations for you you know where it's like anyone who's going it's like hey let me think about that when you went to galapagos like let me tell you some shit get out of guayaquil not worth it you're like oh that was helpful just a little boots on the ground recommendations of like there's a there is a good coffee shop right outside the airport hit it before you're like oh yeah i'll look for it right you know um yeah i'll think of it i hope i think i gave you most of what you needed in here okay if i think of anything else i'll definitely let you know and let me know if you're ever like really carving it out i can set you up with these two and okay they'll they'd love to show you around you can go either way too i guess it's right in the middle yeah i'm really fucking sick how about iran heard anything about it i want to do it my friend went swiss swedish friend he loved it she said it was three regions this is eight years ago there's three or four regions you can't go to and then 30 that are the most glorious hiking you've ever seen in your life and it's like modern and like even like iraq is too but i think around is like very like it's like a modern leaning place look at their leaders if their leaders wearing a suit it's one thing if the leader's wearing some makeshift military outfit and it's like i don't know about this whole country i don't know if you're wearing a tablecloth on your head i don't know yeah it's a little bit of a mind fuck because you know like we're saying the low probability things can still be scary so like the idea of like having a problem and now you're stuck there for a long time like sure probably my biggest fear but like if you make fun of the government that's not my thing i'm not a dissident i don't give a fuck about the politics of this place so that is the gang on gang violence part it's not doesn't affect me right hopefully yeah and you know i always check to see i'm like what's up what's going on how many people have been well then like venezuela they're like they actually are just grabbing just fake arresting a bunch of americans because they can see america coming at them so like let's have some trading pieces so like this hiker said some shit and you'd be like what no i didn't like yeah yeah you're detained and you're like oh actually it's probably not a safe time to go now and yeah i don't know but like i know a bunch of people who have been going and they're like it's the fucking most amazing thing in the world uh i want to do it we'll see it's gonna be tough to convince the people of my life but to go i'm gonna start grooming them yeah when i start deciding because i'm gonna pass what'd you say pass for middle eastern which is a nice little one up i think um hopefully all right guys check about not julio on instagram and youtube the youtube channel like watch the videos if you like this kind of shit you'll love you'll love it i mean i think that it's i make some of the best stuff out there so i think you do thank you man and uh and your good attitude about it and your special is oh yeah it's called on the map on the map yep and i thank you guys for checking that out too and yeah give it a watch some of the stories i told in here i have a couple jokes about iraq in there that are fun nice and you'll like it uh yeah well i guess one last thing there's a signs in a lot of the restaurants that say everybody pays for themselves because people are like so generous they get into big fights about about who's paying and they start screaming at each other and they're like guys we can't because i pay you're like no i'm fucking paying like you're like i'm fucking paying you're like yeah so they're like we don't do this everyone pays for themselves split checks no matter what yeah that's so funny other places like no split checks do you know natalie akar comedian who natalie akar she's lebanese anyway she's a comic and i was like what does this say and she's like it says everybody something and the last word i don't understand it's a specifically iraqi word and that that means whatever that that rounds out that thought because it's like a phenomenon wow that's so funny that's so funny and also i got good spa recommendations in iraq if you're looking to get a good massage and shit for sure is that is iraqi massage a thing no they do time as long as you're cool with like a fucking big thick dude giving it to you then yes as long as he's cool with a boner it works two ways steve was like a rest an olympic wrestler slowly push my butt up against yeah season four episode six of sex on the city i don't want to do that but yeah it's the trip of a lifetime so all right damn nice bro thank you appreciate fucking ruled all right well that's it everybody i hope you enjoyed it thank you very much julio gallarani for coming in again guys check out our other episode we did um about afghanistan which was a great episode trippy award nominee from 2025 you should check it out for real um it's carnival season full swing here and uh this is wait where are we where is this this is brazil um yeah dude julio's great check out his he's got a brand new uh i mean the iraq video you for sure check out but he's got a brand new um tanzania video went to a small town check out local uh he just lives right he's just like actually like looking at shit small town going through an industrial revolution he has got like a he's not just like this is the food they eat he's like oh let me actually explore a place he's doing it he's doing it right julio's doing it right check out his youtube page youtube.com slash not julio because it's julio um uh his special on the map is available right now too on his on his youtube page not uh youtube.com slash not julio and his instagram not julio uh on instagram um he's also going to be at big laugh in fort worth for two shows tickets at not julio.com um well that's it you guys that's the episode damn that is interesting iraq that's one of the far off places for sure merry ramadan to all of you i hope your fast is going well do you guys fast is that a thing uh whatever you do i hope it goes well for you um i would like to get to some of these arab countries i do have to check what is safe for jews and what is not safe for jews obviously uh it's not the same as what is safe also what is safe for americans last i heard they're they're grabbing um hostages in venezuela because maduro is a lunatic and he wants a hostages to be able to trade with the united states in case they come after him so i'm going to check what is safe for jews and what is not not safe for americans to go to venezuela maybe it's safe for some other people um what else was i gonna say i'm aware um it's a different idea down here though that that was a different idea down here people will be like why is america getting involved they it's funny the way we go further south in latin america it goes from like they don't want tourists they don't want to go to venezuela they don't want to go to venezuela and then eventually it goes to like they don't want american interventionism the further south you get they start seeing it for what it is the closer you get to che Guevara's hometown uh the closer you get to like get the fuck out of here already um so they were conflicted they were like yeah he was a dude but why is it always the u.s doing it why is it always the u.s doing it it always seems like you guys you're doing it for the oil that's what one guy said geronimo in uruguay and i'm like yeah i for sure nobody's gonna do it again just do it for free well they're just gonna do a bunch of charity for free then you do it um but also yeah i'm sure it'll get destabilized like it always i was with the worst at it that's what i i don't because i don't know anything about why i'm even bringing it up i don't know anything today's episode is produced by your mom's house network it's edited by alan caffey next week it's one of two episodes it's either gonna be brendan sagalow sag daddy or fahim anwar brendan sagalow went to fiji that's gonna look cool actually on tape you should be checking this podcast out on uh on youtube um brendan sagalow went to fiji fahim anwar went to europe when he was like just out of college um both are good episodes depends on if he releases a special by next week or not if not then i'm gonna hold this episode back till about may got a very big announcement coming for all my fans not just of this podcast but of my stand-up comedy um coming in two weeks in two weeks and now make that one a big episode who should we put on there maybe ari maddy maybe balton bankrupt maybe oh ben neistat all of our trees yeah we got some jews from but it's gonna be a big one god i would like to go to iraq get back on topic alan keep me on track here yeah i want to go to some of these countries but it's not someone's not saying honestly though is it really not safe for jews is it really have you heard about a jew being abducted uh that that guy got his head chopped off but that was like beginning of gulf war that was like beginning of gulf war anyway um that's it everybody thank you very much for tuning in please get a t-shirt please subscribe wherever you're watching listening leave a comment tell him how much you like julio tell him uh by the way another uh trippy award nominee for best episode already for 2025 that makes that will make two i mean probably he'll make the nomination it's so interesting the way he travels that'll make two nominations for julio galvani but we'll have to wait for nine more months until we find out 10 more months until we find out who he is all right guys i got nothing left to say i'm just meandering get back to your lives enjoy your ramadan or like have a peaceful one i got blessed a few times to allah on this trip i gave some charity once to some orphanage and he blessed me to allah like a million times over he felt really good so i'll say this long last day this is content there's black compliments or an eight to one ratio over white compliments let me explain to you what i mean me and mike cannon we're walking we did um the egg in albany or a casino somewhere out there and um near there and uh we're walking to go get some food with the opener lady also fuck i forgot her name nope it's not there uh she worked with me twice vermont she worked with me as well funny funny lady um we're walking to go get steaks and people are at the show because you got to walk through the casino and they're like all right you know that was funny i was like oh thanks oh thanks thanks we just want to get some fucking steak bro it's comps it's my favorite tight it's my favorite cut of steak is comp steak we're like oh thanks thanks thanks let's go guys mike let's go let's go let's go and he's like i know we gotta get there we can't be talking to people let's go and we're like trying to get there listen i appreciate you had a good time but i'm i'm looking for a free steak and they're gonna close so if you're a fan you know how important that is to me uh thanks i appreciate it thanks and then we walk through the and there's some black dude with the white chick this is not about interracial shit i don't care i'm past that i used to affect me when i was in high school and college it doesn't bother me anymore i don't even think twice about it i i did make a mental note of every time to see how far we've come and he goes oh i was at your show uh great job me and mike i almost had her name stopped came back and was like oh thanks man gave the guy a handshake thanks a lot that's really cool you had a good time were you there too to the wife try to include her listen you you're fucking married to a black dude you're doing your part i'll do my part to include you i don't want you to make you feel like hey i'm racist how dare you no no no you're welcome how were you there too i was great job okay great i'm gonna get back to the black guy so you had a good time i'm so glad dude thank you so much mike cannon pretty much on one knee doing the cross in front of him thank you so much this means so much eight to one eight to one compliment now here's why i say that a blessing from allah eight to one over blessing from jesus allah be with you allah praise you to the heavens oh dude yes oh i want this i want all of this jesus loves you great dude doesn't he love everybody though doesn't he literally love everybody praise you allah to the highest fuck you what what to the highest that and then i gave some leftovers to a brazilian guy in uh i don't know where uh some some town in my house um this is gonna look cool guys subscribe wherever you're watching listening you can see fucked up recordings like uh like this one going on pretty much right now um i'm already sure i'm not professional but i do take you places it's carnival season um it'll be over by the time you see this all right thanks everybody assalamu alaikum until next week with i gotta assume brendan sagalow and then two weeks huge announcement so subscribe hit the like button and come back here it'll also probably be on the the the instagram page instagram.com slash uh at ubtrippinpod and probably on instagram.com slash ari shafir at ari shafir probably all those places will have the announcement but come here and i'll tell you what i'll do it here first i'll do it here first on ubtrippin let's get back to the oh no goodbye till next week probably brendan maybe fiend who cares you're gonna watch either way now at kroger your points add up to more ways to save every trip use them your way to take dollars off groceries at checkout or save at the pump you can even save up to 35 on your next fill up same points more choices and with low prices on fresh quality food plus digital and personalized offers tailored 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