The transcription features a collection of humorous and emotionally charged personal anecdotes shared by a host and guest. The stories revolve around everyday blunders—like microwaving wet socks, getting superglue in a belly button, or being caught in a party dare—that lead to physical discomfort, financial strain, or emotional fallout. One story highlights a brother-in-law’s prank resulting in medical expenses, prompting discussion on responsibility and family dynamics. Another centers on workplace conflict stemming from a coworker’s extreme sensitivity to smells, raising concerns about harassment and boundaries. A third story reveals a partner editing her out of vacation photos, sparking outrage over authenticity and emotional erasure in marriage. The final anecdote involves a boyfriend claiming a party dare was just a joke, causing confusion and distress for the woman involved. These stories collectively explore themes of accountability, emotional boundaries, and human vulnerability, delivered with a mix of humor, empathy, and sharp observation. The host frames them not just as jokes, but as reflections on how people navigate missteps, relationships, and personal integrity in real life. Each narrative illustrates the complexity of social interactions and the importance of honesty, respect, and empathy.
- We're rolling, we're here. - This is exciting. - I'm excited. - Pleasure to meet you. - I'm so excited to have you. - Thank you. - I've been panicking over what stories I'm gonna read for you for probably 20 hours now. - Really? - Oh yeah, let 'em rip. - I was literally on a red eye from London for our honeymoon. And I was like, oh my God, Sal's coming on. What the fuck am I gonna read? (laughing) And I hope I deliver today. - I will deliver today. - Okay. - I'm excited, 'cause I don't know what I'm gonna get into right now. - I know. - It's the air of excitement right now for me. - Hi guys. - Congratulations by the way. - Thank you. I know, it's a-- - I love love. - It's quite surreal. I'm like, I wanna do it again. It was so much fun. - What does it feel to you? What does it feel like to be to be married? - It's good. It's really good. Really exciting. - It's throwing around my husband, this, my husband, that yet? - I used it for the first time today. And I was like, oh God, that sounds weird. - It sounds weird. It's gonna, it sounds crazy. - It's crazy. - Okay. - It's fun though, right? - It is really fun. Like, all of our friends are texting us after the wedding, they're like, I don't know how you guys are doing, but we're depressed. It's over because it was so fun. - Oh, that's awesome. - So they're like, we need to do an anniversary party every year. Like, you need to keep throwing these parties. And I'm like, okay. - Did you have a banger wedding? It was like-- - I mean, we had a camel. We had a donkey. We had a magician. - Well, you did have the camel. - Oh yeah. - Okay, good, good, good. - Yeah, we got it all. - You got a camel, a donkey in a magician. - Yeah. - Terrible. - Terrible reader. - I would have never guessed you said that. You would have said, "Terrible reader, hat bar." - The magician would have blew me away, but somehow in the third position there, I wasn't that impressed with it because you started with camel. - And it's hard to-- - Did you have camel riots? Donkey riots? - Donkey was passing out beer. - And you have an activity scene, what was going on? - Love her boy. You know, that would have been a really good idea. People probably would have really loved to beat these guys. - How do you get a camel? You got a camel girl? - Yeah, I got a camel girl. - How do you do that? - She's got two of them. - She just Google camel girl. - My mom's friends got two camels. - Your mom's friends? - Yeah. - Your mom's friend is the one who has-- - Yeah, she owns two camels. - Well, how does that happen? - Good morning. - Do camels need to be somewhere where camels be? - I don't know, it's in Minnesota. They survived there, I guess. - Minnesodian camels? - Yeah. - Wow. - They do okay. They do okay. - Who's the magician good? - Oh my God. His name's Chris, he is amazing. I still am sitting here. Like, I don't understand some of his tricks. - She's just kind of walking around during the reception, just blowing people's balls off, yeah. - Yeah, exactly. - I feel like you would really fall for it. - Oh, I love magic. - You seem like that vibe. - Yeah, it's fun, why not? I love it. - Okay. - Yeah, I have magician friends and I sometimes I'll tell me a little tricks and stuff. - The carbonara, that's okay. - Yeah, kids. - Yeah, more than other-- - Are you mad at him? - Oh yeah, I know him, yeah. - I feel like he's actually magic. - Have you gone to the magic castle? - Yeah. - Okay. - It's like one of my favorite places. I was invited and I went and they turn me away at the door because they didn't like my pants. And my three friends who I went with went in. And I walked in a stiff leather upper by the way. I walked to Ross for less about eight miles away to try to get pants to get back in time to see the show. - Oh my god. - And I went there, I was like literally have blisters. I get there and I took a pair of slacks from Ross for less. They weren't hemmed. They were like proper slacks that weren't hemmed. So they were like a foot too long. - They still-- - I cuffed them inward. - Okay. - And I walked back to the magic castle. By the time I got a day where they were all done again. I had new slacks on and I got up and I'm not even joking. It was like clockwork. My friends were walking out that the whole night was done. I missed the whole entire thing. - I've got a pass if you want to go. - Do you even have a pass? - Yeah. - You can have a pass? - Well like we have like a friend who's she's got tickets and she's just like here is a pass for you. - Yes, I do want to go. - Okay. - But I don't want to take a pass that you have. - I got to bring some people. - You're getting a jail free card, what's that? - I get to bring five people. - Okay. - Yeah, it's me plus five. - Really? - Yeah. - I do want to go again. I want to see. - I got you. - I love immersion. - Same. - I love to be immersed. - Okay, we're immersing you today. Here we go. Terrible at introducing my guests per usual. You guys welcome back to another episode two. How it takes? I'm host Morgan. I've got Sal. Volcano over here. Not to be confused with Tonka Jahari. I know that's a common misconception. This is not Tonka. This is Sal. Not Tonka. I'm not crispy. I'm not crunchy stick basketball. I'm not Prince Herb. These are all names I've gotten from that show. - It's not raining today. - It's not raining. - Yeah. - So that's positive. So let's get into these stories, shall we? - Yes. - Let's dive in. (upbeat music) - The way you've prepped me for this, I am so intrigued. - Okay, our first one, I'm using you into it. Okay, I can't just fuck you up at the beginning. So this first one is coming from our slash, Today I Fucked Up. It is nine days old, titled Today I Fucked Up by microwaving my socks at work. - Okay. - So I bike to work. This morning it poured on me halfway there and my shoes and socks were absolutely soaked. By the time I got to the office, my feet were pruned like raisins. I thought, quote, okay, I'll just drive them out real quick in the break room microwave. I'd seen people do gloves in there before. No big deal. I take off my socks, toss them in for two minutes, go back to my desk. About 45 seconds in, I smell something awful. Like burnt hair mixed with wet dog, then the fire alarm goes off. Turns out, the synthetic material in my socks basically melted and filled the entire office with smoke. Everyone evacuated, building management shows up, ask where the fire is, and all my coworkers are standing around shivering in the parking lot. Well, I admit to, uh, it was my socks. - Wow. - Now the microwave is trashed. HR sends an email reminding everyone not to cook clothing. (laughing) And I have achieved permanent nickname status hot socks. Today I fucked up. - Did you though? I mean, this, what I heard right there is a core memory. I heard life. I heard a story that is only laughs now that is passed. - Hot socks is a pretty cute nickname. - You got a nickname. - Hot socks. - This is like, I don't know if you fuck, sometimes like, you know, I'm, as a comic. I mean, that's, that's amazing. And we look for things to happen like that, you know? - What's your, what's your biggest work? Fuck up. - Oh my God, um, I had to think back across my whole life here. My biggest work, I'm trying to think. - I know, it doesn't have to be in practical jokers. - I wasn't, oh, I wasn't. - You were going way back, okay. - I was just going to my jobs. - Okay. - I didn't even consider it. Yeah, yeah. 'Cause on the show, it's like, I mean-- - That's what you do. - That's what I do. - That's what I do. - Every moment, yeah. I was trying to think it's, if I might have messed up in any, like, real way-- - What jobs have you had before? - I've only had like four jobs in my life. - What are they? - My first job, I worked at a deli. - Okay. - For four years through high school. - Okay. - And I delivered pizza for four years through college. And then after college, I began working at potential securities. Oh my gosh, my aunt worked there. - Oh, really? - Yeah. - So I worked at the home offices in New York and I, from different departments. And then I wanted to focus on comedy and stuff. So I left and started bar-tending. My plan B was to own a business if I didn't, like, break through and comedy. So as I was bar-tending, I was learning that business as well as I could. And toward like the ninth or 10th year of being a bartender, I bought a bar. - Ooh. - With some friends. - Very cool. - And then I started a business and that exact, I mean, I bought this bar. I put in like half my life savings into it. Two months later, I got the television show. - That's crazy. - Which is wild because I needed to, you know, when you start a business, you need to dedicate all of your time to- - Yeah, you're kind of all in. - And now I basically won the lottery after all these failures and I got this show. And you need to put all your energy into that. So for the first two seasons of that show, I had the bar and the show. And I would do the show all day. And I would go and be at the bar until four in the morning. New York is four o'clock. - Oh my God. - So I'd be there, you know, three or four nights a week till four o'clock. And then filming at eight, nine o'clock. - That's a grind. - It was, it wasn't good. And after two years in the show, still being on, I took a leap of faith. And I relinquished my shares in the bar. - Wow. - Yeah. - I always got so scared watching people with the little meat slicer thing. Like every time I watch someone slice a meat for a sandwich. - I still have a scarf from slicing my tip of my finger. - Oh. - I'll never forget the lady one of a half a pound of pepperoni. - No, see that counts. That's sliced it off. - Did you put it back? - And it was like sliced off. It was so painful. I went to the hospital, I put it in iodine. It was, it stung so badly. And I stood to this day. - You can feel the dent. - And you also see the scar on it. Because like, like my finger tip doesn't have the fingerprints on it, right here. - Oh my God. - Well, that's a good way to not get identified. - Yeah, so I guess I fucked up there. Slicing my finger in the slicer. - Yeah, no. - But there's definitely, I definitely have stories 'cause I didn't always, like I definitely messed up somewhere in some way, shape or form. But I, I don't know, yeah, I would, I would have been hesitant and put in clothes in the microwave. - I know. - My grave's dead. 'Cause sometimes they have those like little like, yeah, those fibers in there. - I mean, you'd be plate sometimes spark. - Yeah, it's insane that it was raining and it got evacuated and everything outside. And HR, sending that thing that's a don't cook clothing is really a nice thing.
passive aggressive, little dig from HR. I love it. That's it. That is mortifying. Yeah. How do you come back from that? You feel like an, I imagine someone felt like an idiot. Hot socks. Was it a woman? Hot socks. I thought you said she. You know, no mention. I don't know why I was picturing a being a woman. I see I was picturing a being a guy, because I don't think a woman would be. You're right. That's definitely got a guy written all over. Yeah. I don't know why I thought it was on. This next one has guy written all over it too. Okay. This is coming from AITAH, seven months old, titled, "Am I the asshole for taking my brother-in-law to small claims court for a prank?" I recently took my brother-in-law to small claims court over a prank he pulled on me, and now my wife and her family are furious. I need to know if I'm wrong here. A few months ago, we were at a family barbecue. I had a few too many beers, and I fell asleep in a hammock with my shirt off. My brother-in-law, who was completely sober, thought it would be hilarious to fill my belly button with super glue. Oh, God. At some point, I must have touched it, because when I woke up, I had glue partially dried in my belly button and on my finger. We tried to remove it, but it was stuck. The glue had adhered to my skin, and when we attempted to peel it off, it caused some tearing around the edges. Unfortunately, my job's insurance has a $1,000 ER copay, but I had no choice. I had to go to the ER. They used a solvent and an ointment to remove the glue, and after everything, I was left with a medical bill of $2,253. I asked my brother-in-law to cover the cost since he caused the situation. He refused. After trying to resolve it privately, I took him to small claims court, and I won. However, he still hasn't paid. This has caused a major rift in my family. My wife is upset, and her family thinks I overreacted. So am I the asshole for taking him to court over this? His wife is upset at who? Him. Wow. So he's the villain in this. He's the villain. I was going to say, why would court even be necessary? I just feel like if you had to go, and you couldn't, you didn't have the means, and you had to go get that bill, then your brother-in-law should be like, "Oh, I done fucked up. You don't have the means, and this is all because of me, and I thought they would pay." When you first just said the top line, "Am I the asshole for bringing my brother over a prank?" I was like, "Yes, you are." Then the more I listen, let's be reasonable. It's like, you know, like, this was their actions that caused it. You endured embarrassment, pain, a scar, and a bill that you couldn't afford. And then you appealed to them, and there was nothing you could do to strike at maybe a 50/50 split. I don't know. Yeah. No. But also, that's, that's moronic, though. What did they think the net net was going to be putting superglue in someone's belly button? Superglue. Yeah. Like, they're going to get, that's not going to be an easy one. So like, that's also like, that was, it's not like, you know, they put like a tickled in their nose with a feather, and they were sleeping, so the person like slapped their face. Yeah. Like, that was going to adhere to their skin from the get, and everyone has manned it. No one in that family on the other side sees any reason like this, not a, it's not a distribution of fault. If, if anything, everyone is just mad at this person. Yeah. We do get a little bit more info on that. The reason my wife was upset is because her brother was going through a divorce and between jobs. Everyone knew he did it. He even admitted it. He blames his ADHD. I don't want to garnish his pay. The reason I didn't try more to clean the glue off of me was because I have scars in my navel from gall bladder surgery about three years ago. My mother-in-law has offered to pay the bill, but she is on a fixed income. And I would feel like an ass for taking her money. Of course, I'm the villain, and only my sister-in-law is on speaking terms with me. My wife is only barely on my side. It was her that took me to the ER, not thinking it would cost that much. I figured blood is thicker than water. I didn't expect this thread to blow up. Whoa. Yeah. I mean, I would have also like, did the ER have some magic solvent? I would have just went on Google first and been like, you know, crazy glue, skin, what do I do? I'm not going to Google that. I'm like, wondering like, I just got to be some like home remedies and stuff. I mean, there's like 3M adhesive remover, 90 bucks from Uline. I would have tried everything I could before going to the ER. But the bottom line is it's not that person's fault that they have to go to the ER. No, no. It's not. And I honestly think that, and to blame ADHD is a bonkers. I don't even know what that means. Why would ADHD make you put like, you know, crazy glue in your brother-in-law's belly button while he sleeps? I mean, you got it. Like I've heard of procrastination and you know, that's not one of the hallmarks symptoms of ADHD. No. No, and I have it. Yeah, extreme. I have it. I have it. So the umpteenth. I've never even thought of that. No. Because we have brains. That's the person's moronic. I mean, I mean, look, you can't start editorializing here. Let's just talk about the facts. He did this to me. This was moronic to do. This person wasn't thinking. It calls me this. You can't start like being like, well, he was in the middle of a divorce. He's got this. He's got what? How does that excuse the behavior? I wonder why he got divorced, you know, like, I mean, this person, I just feel like they make poor choices, right? I know. I feel like I feel bad for this person because I feel like there being really, if I was the brother-in-law, I'd be like, look, it's going to take some time, but I will pay this all off eventually. Hey. I mean, more adults here. Come on. Yeah. Let's start working towards it. Yeah. What is the payment plan? Yeah. That is reasonable enough for you to do the right thing. And let's just start from there. We don't need to like cause a rift in the family here. No. It says bonkers. Yeah. Well, that's crazy. So I feel for this person. Now, do they ever report back a resolution? So we don't. You can't go on as to wages because at the end of the day, you got to be the bigger person. That's tough. You also have to front money. You don't have. Exactly. So like, where is everybody else's empathy for you or sympathy for you? Yeah. You know? No update on this one. I don't see any comments from OP. This is going to bother me personally because I'm going to now be thinking about this like what came of this? Cause I almost want to be like, like, like, I almost want to be the representative of this person. Okay. I want to have like a, you know, intervention with the family. Yeah. And I want to just speak my mind because this person is getting the short end of the stick. I know. They really are. The top comment does agree with you. Not the asshole. I can't believe your wife isn't with you on this. Yeah. Pranks shouldn't involve the ER. Next comment and thousands of dollars. Yeah. I think that's pretty sure. I don't know who would think otherwise except to people in that family. It's weird. Yeah. It's super weird. But moving along to this next one. Yes. Okay. This is coming from. How am I doing? You're doing great. All right. You're doing great. I think you're, you're nailing it. Very empathetic takes. Yeah. Coming out of from all angles. Yeah. I love it. I'm the only amp. Okay. So this one is coming from R/A-I-T-H. It's five days old. Am I the asshole for refusing to stop washing my hands just because my coworker is sensitive to smells? I have this coworker who always says she's sensitive to smells. No one's allowed to wear deodorant, let alone perfume in the office because she throws a mini tantrum if she smells anything except clean, undiluted oxygen. Usually, she just complains to the boss and then everyone gets a generic company-wide email saying we're a scent-free zone and blah, blah, blah, I roll everyone back to work. Now, she's been extra annoying these last few weeks. She keeps saying she smells perfume. No one will admit to wearing any. We get emails about office smells almost daily now and nothing changes. So she's decided to take the law into her own hands, so to speak. Like two to three times a week, she starts walking up and down the aisles. Oh my god. Sticks her head into each person's desk. Oh, get out of here. Takes a big whiff and moves on to the next desk, all to try and find the culprit. On Friday, she did this again. I just come back from the bathroom when she got to my desk. She did her smell test on me and immediately lost it. Apparently, the perfume that she's been smelling the last few weeks was coming off of me. Here she made a scene in front of everyone. We determined what she was smelling was hand soap that I used in the bathroom. She wasted enough time of my day. By that point, I professionally told her to fuck off and I'm not going to stop washing my hands because she's a hyperchondriac. The way I phrased it was like, quote, "hand washing with soap is a non-negotiable hygiene practice and I will not stop doing it. You can't reasonably expect me to avoid that." This was Friday and now I'm dreading going back tomorrow. Our boss was off Friday as well. I expect I'm going to get pulled into a meeting. Am I the asshole or are these just the Sunday scaries? Okay. Let me say this. I am hypersensitive to smells. Are you? Yes. And Cologne and perfume give me a migraine headache and make me nauseous when they're really strong. They were like walking to an elevator and someone in here today. You know, when it's just too much or if I have a flight and the person next to me is really like loaded up or if I get in an Uber, I've gotten in Uber and I'm so sorry I have to cancel us Uber because I can't because by the time it's not worth giving
myself on my green. I don't know if I'm allergic or something. No, a lot of people are sensitive like that, especially like smoke smell, like that's a really hard one. I wasn't always my whole life. Well, smoke or like body odor is another whole other thing, but perfumes like Ken, you know, but I wasn't always like that. But like I am now. So I understand the plight of the other woman. Okay. But she's completely overextending herself. It's wild to go around sniffing people. And again, I don't really understand how people just can't come to a very logical, simple conclusion before like they get to this state at all. The woman's crazy for walking on smelling people and then making a huge to do when she's located. It's not about her. She's not everyone in the office doesn't have to bend to her. They shouldn't have to do anything they don't want to. If they still want to wear their perfume, that's their prerogative. If she's kind about it and they want to oblige her because she presents it in a way that is amenable. And it's like motivates them to be like on her side. And like, you know what? I can take this for the team for you. Like, but that's not the way she's approaching this. But I would even just have been like, oh my God, you know what? I think you might have the scent of the hands open the bathroom on there. Obviously, you have to wash your hands. It would you be okay if I bought the soap of your choice that's unscented. Oh, I put that in the bathroom. Like whatever you like. Yeah. And this way, we both, you know, it's a win-win. You know, like there's ways around these things. Yeah. Well, and clearly the office is trying to accommodate her. I mean, they send out emails worth a cent free zone, blah, blah, blah. Like the office is kind of catering to this person. So I feel like it feels like an HR overreach. It feels like a bit of a Karen situation. It's starting to feel a bit like harassment, especially her going desk to desk. Like my, I would be like, I would be like, hey, listen, man. You got the sun. I'm smelling something too. And it's crazy. I'm smelling some crazy. It's you. It's you. Can you imagine? I'm just envision her. And I know she's probably not doing this, but I'm just envisioning her like going up to these people and like lifting their arm and like smelling their armpits. Be like, you're wearing crazy. That's crazy. You'd rather. It's not like a peanut allergy with his peanuts in the air and like someone could die. You'd rather smell people's body odor than deodorant. Right. That's crazy. No, no. There's something about like deodorant lately. And maybe it's because we were traveling, but like not enough people are using deodorant. I know. What is up with that? I'm always shocked when I smell someone that doesn't smell good because I'm like, you, you have to know I don't know how because when I start to smell like I can tell you immediately know I'm like, I need to go home and get a gross. Yeah. Right. I mean, maybe someone like can't do anything about it. They're out and about and they've already gone, whatever they're jaw whatever the hell they did. But like, but sometimes it's just a person who wasn't working out that smells horribly. And you just like, you can't even speak to them. I don't think some people believe in deodorant. I know. But they got to do something. Something. That is, that's, that's, that's terrible. I mean, that's, yeah. I know. I know because it's, I feel like I'm in prison. Like if you get into a taxi or something like that, it smells. I have, I have hung my head out the window like a dog. No, I just the whole entire ride like this. And I can't, I don't, I don't try to turn and salt anybody. But I, I've gone to the point. I have a weak constitution. So I've got like my stomach is like, I will throw up. I get, if I'm grossed out, I will at least dry heave. And it only takes a few dry heaves for a full volume, I think, you know, so like, I don't know what? Yeah. Oh my god. You're a person with a metaphobia is like biggest fear. Oh, a, a, a, a metaphobia means, isn't that the one where they're scared of puking? Puking? Yeah. I'm not scared of puking. No, clearly. No, but I've, yeah, like someone who was scared of puking. Yeah. No, but like my friends sometimes try to gross me out just because they get me going. Yeah. So like, I, it's like, I don't even want to be mean, but I almost can't hide my disgust. No, I've done like this. And like, right, I leaned out the window like this is like, once I'm in like, and I can't do anything about it. When do you feel trapped? I have to take them to my own hands and do whatever I can. So I really do understand this, this woman, but it's like just being unreasonable. You have to draw the line at some point. Top comment, not the asshole. If there's an issue with the center of the soap, whoever stocks it will have to get unscented soap. There it is. Although at this time, I'd say your workplace is justified in requiring medical documentation, otherwise it's time for you and your co-workers to file a complaint of harassment and her creating a hostile workplace. Yeah. Next one down. If she actually had a problem with the soap, wouldn't she have smelled it herself when she washed her own hands after using the restroom? The plot thickens. Yeah, she used, she's using the same soap. Or does this person not wash her hands? Nope. Nope. That's what the next comment thinks. Bold of you to assume she washes her hands. Yeah. That's discussed. Yeah, that is. That's another epidemic. People do not wash their hands. I'd walk around smelling hands for the ones that don't smell like the soap, and I'd charge them. That's a thought. You know, uh, watching people walk out of the bathroom after. No, I'm in airports all the time. So I'm in there. And I got to tell you a surprisingly high number percentage people do not wash their hands. Well, I think it's like that's why when I walked up and shook your hand. I wish shots. I had just washed my hands by the way. Same. I just, yeah, same. I came where I came from. Every time I'm done with something, I wash my hands. Yeah. And I have the, the stuff, the sand that, yeah, that back. I got a big guy over there. Yeah. And so I was fine. But I will wash my hands. Yeah. Well, I know you're like a, like, you're kind of germafold. It's not when I'm meeting someone like you, one-on-one, we're about to sit down, have a conversation. Yeah. But people approach me all day long and then put out their hand and vice-shake 20, 30 hands a day. I'll get sick. Honestly. So here's a stat that might not make you want to shake any more hands. If you shake someone's hand or like just like touching door knobs or whatever throughout your day, you're like on average touching 10 dicks a day. Yes. Because people don't wash their hands. If I touch one person's hand, it's 10 dicks. Or just like going about your day, like if you touch a door knob, like someone could have touched a day. Definitely can see 10 dicks. Yeah. But one person's hand, one dick. Depends on how they're watching my hands before I use the bathroom. And then again, right after, because I don't want to touch, I don't want my dick to touch 10 dicks. That's the thing. But no, but I, people wash after. I'm like, hello. Some people don't wash before and after. I literally have a family member. And he is like, no, I don't wash my hand after I just touched myself. Like, that's fine. And I'm like, yeah, but you got to touch somebody else at it. No, they don't get it. By the way, that's how do you with the scientific estimation for 10 dicks on the door knob? That's so funny to me. That's so funny. 10 is such a. I think it was 10. It's so funny. And I want to know the formula. I want to know the formula that someone used to get that on average. There's a bunch of different things coming up that says it's actually more. It's actually you come into contact with 15 penises. How do you guess to me that? But I will tell you this too. Once I wash my hands, I take the paper towels and I open the. That's why I do. with that paper towel. And then I throw it away. Especially on planes. Of course. And I also make sure everyone sees me coming out doing that. No, same. I have a coming and I open it. I like open it all the way. And then you look. And then I just like throw it in there and I hold it open my foot. Yeah. And because I want someone to extend the same courtesy. I'm glad about that. Yeah. I was a flight attendant for a while and the amount of. Wow, I could never ever hate flying. I'm terrified of flying. And people are more like how were you a flight attendant? I'm like, I don't know. I think it was like. It's kind of like car anxiety. I have a really bad car anxiety. But if I'm driving, I'm fine. It was kind of like that. I know I'm not flying the plane. But you're just kind of like in more control. But the amount of people that walk into those bathrooms on planes without shoes on, it is atrocious. And you guys know that's not water on the floor, right? That's piss. Yeah. That's piss. That's piss on the floor. I don't even. When I go. I don't. First of all, I won't go unless it's an emergency situation. Really? And if I go to like a regular bathroom, like in a public, wherever public space, you know, at the urinal, I don't know if you know this, but you look down as a puddle in front of every urinal. That's one. That's. That's. That's a. What's wrong with you guys? That's a concoction. That's a concoction. That's just everyone's piss in a puddle. And I go. I put my legs apart further than shoulder width, my feet. So I am not in. I don't touch any of the piss if I can help it. Yeah. My shoes have never, ever, ever been on in my home in my life. Yeah, no, that's good. And there's just piss everywhere. And I've seen this happen. I've seen this. I've seen people go in there and I almost convulse. Yeah. Who raised them? What are their concerns? How are they walking into a piss riddles bathroom in their socks? And then those socks go in the shoe. And then those shoes, those inside of those shoes, always have everyone's piss in them. And then you go home, you change socks, you put them back in. Those people's piss are with you for life. I'll never forget this girl. She had uggs on. Like the uggs you slip your feet into. She took her uggs off, walked into the bathroom, and then came back to her seat and put her feet back in her uggs. Oh my god. It's sickening. It's sickening. It's disgusting. As a flight attendant, I have two questions. And this is one I always wonder because I don't think it's real. I think it's fake and I don't really believe that anyone's ever done it. Do you feel like someone has actually been in the mile high club? Yeah. How is it? They try it. Okay, so a couple things. What is your responsibility if you think that's happening?
and have you ever experienced anything like that? - I didn't. I think you're supposed to knock on the door and get 'em out. Also, a flight attendant can open that locked bathroom from the outside. - You don't want to open the nacks in there, right? - No. - But how did they try? One person goes in and it's maybe a late night flight. This is the only way-- - Secret knock, yeah. - And then another person goes up. I'll be in in like 30s. I'm one minute, I'll go in. And then everyone's kind of dark, everyone's sleeping. Then they both go in. But then it's so small in there. And then you both got to come out. And also if anybody recognizes, you have to sit the rest of the plane right, either being scolded or reprimanded or called out or people knowing you did that. I just can't see who would ever pull that off. And so they wouldn't get in any type of bigger trouble than just, excuse me, you have to get out. - I feel like you could get banned from the airline. - Right. - I never encountered it. And honestly-- - Have you ever do know a flight attendant that's encountered it? - No. This is what I feel like it's fake. - We didn't talk about it in training. But I feel like there's like those airlines now that are coming out with like the crazy ones. Where it's like 20,000 a ticket and you get your own bed. - Yeah, if I'm flying to Dubai and have a shower, I think then it's like a suit. It's like a hotel room. - Yeah. - So I think people are doing it in those for sure. - Yeah, I think that's a little different even though it's still weird. - People try it though. People like use autopilot and have sex driving their car. People are getting weird. - I didn't know that either. I never thought of that. - Yeah. - And then what about like when just somebody blows up that bathroom and you're, that's where you sit. - Yeah, no, that's. - You dealt with that. That's has to be like every other flight now. - Yeah, 'cause I was on the jump seat. We have spray. A lot of times it wouldn't help. So you'd try to like-- - Does everybody, do you just like look, does everyone just look the other way? Do you, like it's like you don't even want to be-- - It's kind of a thing. - You just make believe, nobody makes believe, everybody just makes believe that they don't acknowledge. - Yeah, like everyone poops. So it's just kind of one of those things that you just got to kind of get through. - Okay. - Yeah. - That's so something I think about all the time. - Have you never pooped on a plane? - No, no, not in my life ever. I know I will. - What? - I will never, ever in my life. - What if you have a really long flight? - It's gonna be whatever I need to do to not go to that restaurant ever. I won't do it. I won't be able to do it. I mean, I understand if an emergency situation, luckily I've never been in a thing where it's like, it's either in my seat right now or in there. I suppose in that scenario, but I would also try some, I don't know what I would do. I wouldn't be say a rosary or something. I'm not even particularly religious, but I don't know what I would do, but I can't even imagine sitting, hovering. I can't imagine like people outside knowing that's what's going on in there. I don't wanna be the person that walks out after that. I just, I wouldn't put my body, my skin, anywhere in that area. It's just not gonna happen. - My husband over there, now it's so fucking weird to say. He, I don't know if he's gonna be mad at me for sharing this, but he just pooped first time. - He's right there, you can clear it with the first, but you choose to not to. I'll just call that out. - He just pooped for the first time on a plane like a month ago. - Okay, okay, was it horrifying or was it not bad? - It was great, I'm a few times it now. - No way, he's down, he likes it. - No way, it was great because of the relief. Because prior to that, you would suffer. - Well, there's a little turbulence, so I felt like I was on a Disney ride at one point. My stomach kinda went up and felt like I was floating. - Oh my God. - I was like, this is incredible. So the actual biological, physical sensation was heightened. - Yeah, because of the pain. - And now you're chasing that thigh. Now you're chasing it. - It feels different at 30,000 feet. - Yeah, like you're leaving for the airport. You're like, I'll wait till I get there. Wow. - I never heard of a plane. - Okay, so if it was only recently, why did you abstain forever? - Why did you abstain? Yeah, that's a good question. - Like, 'cause like, what are your reasons that you never did it? And now that you've seen the light, now that you've done it multiple times already now. So what were the reasons you didn't do it prior to only recent? - I don't really know. Maybe some of the same concerns you. - So when you were walking in for this first one, did you feel like, I have no choice. I'm gonna do this for the first time. I don't know what to expect right now, but I feel vulnerable or I feel weird. And like, here we go. - Well, to alleviate some of the concern, I did it on a plane where there were two dedicated bathrooms right across the aisle from each other. Or there's a plane of two hours, a big plane. - Yeah, 'cause he didn't want someone to be waiting for him outside that door, knowing that he put a book's bathroom, the single bathroom thing, never. Especially when there's a line you imagine, no chance. - Yeah, you don't know what you're opening that door back up to, though, three or four people could have congregated there. - Well, and your clock starts to tick faster when you're inside a bathroom or you know people are waiting outside. - It starts to speed up because you're like, "Oh, God, I've been in here for five minutes." - Right. - I've been here for 10 minutes. - 10 is in a temperature bill. - It's not waiting until I turn it. - He sits on the toilet, wait too long. I want to be honest. - At home, I do too, though. That's where I get my reading done. - You guys are doing this. - Sometimes I sit on the toilet, don't go. - You're gonna get hernias. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - I know, but like, but 10 minutes, I mean, everyone knows what you did. - Yeah, well, you probably didn't end up doing it because you were two in your head by everyone waiting. - Yeah. - You feel completely liberated now. You had no bones about it. You got to go, you're going right in. - I'm probably 55. - Okay, okay. I don't think anyone can be really fully comfortable. - I have a trick for you in this next story. They're introducing us to something that might help you poop on a plane, okay? - Oh. - It's not gonna happen, but all right. - Okay, so this one is coming from, today I fucked up, 11 days old. Titled, "Today I fucked up by mowing on the toilet and discovering it actually works." - Mowing. - Mowing. "I know you know a thing about a cow because you have inseminated one." - Oh, I delivered a baby on the calf, yeah. - Yeah, you were fully up there. - Yeah, up to my shoulder, I was in it. - Yeah, so you know about a mow. - Yeah. - I, 36 female, had a history act to me last week and surgically is basically just finding out how many ways your body can betray you. Sneezing feels like being stabbed. Coffee is a crime against humanity and pooping. LOL, good luck. So I'm up late googling tips because I'm desperate. And I find this random comment where someone goes, quote, "Just mow like a cow. It relaxes your pelvic floor. I rolled my eyes so hard. You want a mow, don't you?" - I was lightly mowing. - Let's hear it. - Moo. - Did you feel anything? - Moo. I suppose. - Okay. - The next morning, I'm on the toilet, sweating, bargaining with the universe. - Just cupped the mow. - And thought. - For the socials. Just, just three seconds for moo. That's it. Too hot takes. - And I thought, fine, let's mow. And I did. Like a legit, deep from the chest. - Moo. - And it worked immediately. Like my body just went, ah, yes. Cow mode engaged. Anyways, here's where I really fucked up. My husband was literally walking past the bathroom as I was mid-moo. He opened the door. We don't usually lock it and just caught me. We made eye contact, eye froze, he froze and then I absolutely lost it laughing. Except laughing after abdominals or dreams. - Oh, God. - Feels like being ripped open from the inside. - Yeah. - So now I'm sitting there on the toilet, crying, clutching my stomach, half laughing, half mowing while my poor husband is staying there. Like what the actual hell did I just walk into? He didn't know whether to comfort me. Call 911 or just back out slowly and pretend that none of it happened. So yeah, today I fucked up by mowing on the toilet and learning it actually works, but also permanently scarring my marriage in the process. (laughing) - That's so funny. I've never heard that before at all. - You're gonna try it the next time though. - Well, I don't know if I'd feel like what she, 'cause it's not gonna be necessarily alleviating anything. So I don't know if I have a, you know what I mean? Like a point of reference to understand that it's working. - You'd have to be like really backed up and that's like your last resort. And then if it works, then you know. - Who even discovered that? - I don't know. - That's funny. - But I like it. - Yeah. - Comment, girl, I'm dying. I couldn't help myself. I tried a deep mow and I could feel my pelvic floor relax and my man, one room over yelled, why are you mowing? - Well, that's, I mean, I can't imagine not one of your listeners, every last person is gonna move next time they go now. - Oh, 100%. - Yeah. - 100%. Okay, you ready to get into the tee of two hot takes? - Let's do it. - I've been like a little light on you. - Hot goss? - Yeah, a little bit. This next one is coming from our very own subreddit. So, because of the show now, we have a place where we kinda take a listener right in. - Oh, okay. - So this is from one of us. It is a day old titled, "My fiance edits me out of our vacation photos." I, 29 female, have been with my fiance 31 male for four years. We love traveling, taking photos, making memories. Recently, we went on a week-long trip to the mountains with some friends. When we got back, I started going through our photos. I noticed something weird. In a bunch of the group shots, I wasn't there, but I know I was. I asked him about it. He admitted that when he saw a picture, where he didn't like how I looked, bad hair, tired face, et cetera, he used his phone's editor to crop me out or replace me with a view of the background. He said he did it, so the trip looked cleaner, so the pics would look nice on social media without me standing there, off balance, et cetera. - What? The pics would look cleaner. [BLANK_AUDIO]
She wouldn't be saying they're off balance, started interrupting to continue. - I told him that hurt me, that I want authentic memories, even if I'm not glam and all of them. He said I'm too sensitive and that photos are just illusions anyways. Now I don't know if I trust memories with him. Is it weird to feel like I'm erased? - I would file for divorce. (laughing) I just don't come back from it. What a, what a, what a weird, like it sounds like this person has issues. - Yeah. - Does he do that with him, with his own photos? - No, he just picks the one where he looks the best. - So he's worried of people judging his wife. Who's gonna do that? Or he's worried of people judging him for his wife, removing her from photos 'cause he wants to post them on social media and thinks she doesn't look acceptable enough in the photo for the, for the viewing public. - That's what it is. - There's a lot going on to unpack there. There's a lot to unpack there. - Top comment has some thoughts. - Okay. - Top comment says he's single online. Like basically, he's trying to look single online. - Well, if he does, does he put, does he do it with every photo he posts? It sounds like he didn't do it with every photo, but it doesn't matter. Like that is problematic behavior. That is very weird. That's the person that is, that I'm telling you, that's the person that, I mean, that could be a serial killer like that guy. - It's, it's, that's insane. That is so highly insulting. - Well, and what he said too, it's like I edit you out when you look like shit, when your hair's bad, your face. - That's not your choice. You could say to me, hey, and I want to post this. Cool. And let her decide, like, yeah, I don't care. Oh, actually, I don't like that. Don't post that one. - Yeah. - You need to post the one where I don't look good. So you need to edit me out and put more mountain in the background. That's insulting and weird. - Cool. And is he doing it to anyone else in the photos? Or is it only his partner? - It sounds like it's only her, which is like, that's the craziest thing I've ever heard. To like, take it upon himself, to deem when his wife looks presentable or not enough for whom. - Why do you care? - And he didn't tell her also. - I know. - That's weird, that he's been doing it for how long, and then she had to approach him about it. And then the reason he gives also his paper is absurd. - I wanted to look nice. - Meaning that it doesn't look nice, if I'm in it and you don't like the way that I look, if I look, did I say, if I look, what'd she say? If I look like. - Just bad, like, bad hair, tired face. - Yeah, that's insulting. - He didn't tell the trip looked cleaner. - That's so stupid. What does that mean? How did the trip look cleaner if one person removed her because they looked tired? That's so, I'm getting angry. I'm getting angry right now. - I just don't understand. - I'm like, what is wrong with you? - Well, and there's no way, everyone looks good. - How well does she know this? They're married for four years? - Fion say, bend together for four years. - You're with someone for four years. And they're. - About to get married. - They're photoshopping you out of photos when they think you look tired, because they don't want that to be seen by the people, and they're not telling you that. That is a rushed, still time. They're still time to get out of that. I would get out of that. - I know. - I can't make an excuse for this person. - No, I mean he's 31, he's old enough to. - 31, I believe me, I would try to play devil's advocate here. I got nothing for this guy. I got nothing. - No, I don't need it. - Except that is very strange behavior. - Well, to me, I'm like, he's trying to hide something. Like, there's people that do that. They want to look better on social media. But then he's like, what did he say? Social media's fake or something along those lines? Pictures are an illusion or something like that? - Photos are just an illusion. - This person's full of shit. - Well, why not give me an instant? - Can't be true. - Yeah, like, right. - Why not post only the solo shots of video? - What does that even mean? It's an illusion. What are you talking? What shit are you talking? That's coming and just, I mean, what the fuck are you talking about? - I don't know. - That's weird. - Look, if he doesn't put her up at all, it's simple. He's cheating on her. He doesn't, he wants people to know he's seen her. That's easy. But it doesn't sound like it's all the time, 'cause she noticed that she was missing in some, right? - Yeah. - So this is like maybe someone who, I don't know, to be, if you're that ashamed of your wife, that's crazy. - No, and what happens like as you go through life? Like what happens if they're together and they decide they want kids and she games a little weight and like, oh. - Are you photoshopping yourself out of photos where everyone else looks good? And when you look tired, it's like, also that's still weird behavior. Like it's like, I can't, this is the, the female is writing it on this? Is there a follow up here? You know what you're gonna do? You're gonna leave me with a nervous tick. I'm gonna leave here and I'm not, I'm never gonna forget these situations. I need closure on these things. - I don't have any comments yet, no update. It's only a day old. - I need closure, and they don't say anything. We just know she's 29F. - Nothing yet, yeah. - I'll let you know though, if I get enough data, send it your way. - Oh, but this was sent to you. - It's on our side. - And so this is coming from a listener or a viewer. - Very likely. - And so they're gonna see this. Okay, so there's possible possibility for closure here. - Please. - Oh, so if you're looking 29F, look at me. This is not normal behavior. You have to take this up with them and you have to get to the bottom of this. And you should not stand for this. - No. - It's very, very weird. Now, I'm private, so I don't post my family online, but that's not what this is. - No. - It's not what this is. - No, he's posting all of his friends. He's posting stuff from his personal life. - Yeah. - But editing out the one person who seemingly should matter most. - Yeah. - I mean, there's another comment here. There's no innocent explanation for editing your fiance out of photos. That's not about aesthetic. It's about hiding the relationship. Huge red flag. - Yeah. - And there's another one that says, it would be a pity if they got married and she has a zit and was edited out of all the wedding photos. After she's 30 or 40 and gets wrinkles, is she banned from photos? Looks like the fiance needs an inflatable doll, not a human. - I agree. Is he going to be wedding photos or just him? - Yeah. - If he doesn't like the way she looks in a certain photo. - It is giving a little self-centered. - I feel like all of what all of these things like, we're not giving, I'm not giving any hot takes. - You just, I feel like a hot take, by definition, isn't a hot take like something that goes a little bit against the grain? I feel like I'm being the voice of reason. I feel like I'm giving an ice cold or a lukewarm take. - You know, maybe this next one will throw a wrench in your ring. - 'Cause I don't think in any of these, I've been like, I'm on the side of the-- - I mean, you said you can't double-advocate this one. Maybe the next one, I got you can double-advocate. You know, maybe it is just a joke. You ready for this next one? - Okay. - Okay. This one is a little inappropriate. It's got a not-safe fur work badge on it. - Okay. - Again, coming from our very own to hot take subreddit five days old, titled, "My boyfriend cheated in front of me, but claims he was just joking." - Jesus Christ, this podcast is making me feel better about myself. - That's the goal. That's the goal here. - I'm like, I'm a great person. - Me, female 21, and my boyfriend, I'll call him Ryan, male 21. - Why call him Ryan? That's so funny. She doesn't even have her name. - No. - Me, F-21, my boyfriend, Ryan. - Ryan. - Okay. - We were at a college party together two nights ago. Just for context. - How old is Ryan? - 21. - Okay. - Just for context, me and Ryan have been dating for two months, and there were around 100 people at the party. I was having fun drinking and hanging out with my friends, but overdid it a little and felt dizzy. I asked Ryan to sit down with me on the couch while I drank some water. He said, "Sure." While we were sitting, Ryan's best friend, I'll call him Jake, came over and was talking to Ryan. I don't know how we got to the topic, but Jake dared Ryan to suck his dick. They both were laughing and looked at me for a reaction. I still didn't feel good, and I thought they were just goofing around, so I just sat there listening. I could have never imagined you were about to say that. Go ahead. - Ryan then said, "Okay, then, I'll do it." Jake unzipped his pants, and Ryan started sucking his dick. - I think we've been trolled in the subreddit. Like, let's see you read this one. - I will investigate. No, I'm gonna look at the camera. - Because there isn't enough. I'm almost about to explode, I can't. I'm gonna need so many details. I have so many questions that are not gonna be able to be answered. I've seen a pattern, and I'm gonna leave here now, and I'm feeling better about myself, but I'm gonna leave here. I'm gonna leave here also with something boiling under my blood, because I don't understand these people. - It only lasted for a few seconds. They both laughed and high-fived. And then Jake-- - And then Jake zipped his pants up and walked away. I was so stunned and disoriented in the moment. I didn't say or do anything. Soon afterwards we went home and I immediately went to bed. Yesterday I woke up and remembered what happened and asked Ryan why he would do that. He said it was just guys being guys and doing silly party dares. - It's so irrational, even that response back. These are, let's play this conversation.
not. Ask me. I'm Ryan. You're 21, okay? It's the next day. Yeah. Approach me about it. Um, why did you suck your friend's dick? What do you mean? I saw you. You sucked his dick. Yeah, but that's just guys doing guys, guys being guys doing fun party thing. It sounds like you're gay. Who speaks like that? Who would be like, it's just guys being guys doing fun party things? Do you mean silly party dares? Silly party dares. What do you? What do you mean? It's a silly party dare. So I'm gonna, I'm gonna get through the story. And then I'm gonna rely on my friends dick because there's a silly party dare. It's guys being guys. You've never heard of silly party dares. So if he goes on to say, I mentioned that it felt like cheating in a way, and he said I was overreacting because it was just a joke. He seemed annoyed and shut down the conversation. Oh my god. Now he's taking this. I'm home now and I don't know how to feel. I'm not even mad. I'm just so confused about what to make of this. I haven't told my friends about this yet because I feel kind of embarrassed. Any advice would be helpful because I'm just not sure what to do. Okay. First of all, this is two months in a board. You're out of this one. Relationship. If this is real, the only thing that I could summarize is that her boyfriend is maybe bisexual and is trying to look for an in-way to let her know that maybe his best friend is more than his best friend. Yeah, that's what I'm getting. And this is like, all right, let's, when we're all feeling Lucy Goosey, let's, but, but wait a minute, there was a hundred people there. Sounds like a frat party. Like I was picturing frat party in college like at some of the ones. I'd like to know what the other 97 people, how they reacted. Like that's still not normal behavior, even at a frat party. You're not like best friend, blow me, silly party games. I mean, they were definitely like hook up rooms in college at the parties. Like, yeah, but that's a, that's an offshoot. Yeah, these people are in the lobby here. They're in the room. I was envisioning offshoot because she felt kind of dizzy. So I was envisioning. She like kind of was like, can we just like go get some air? So the three of them went to an offshoot room. Yeah. It's just the three of them. That's what I'm envisioning, right? So how is it, how is that a silly party, silly party trick? Dare. How is it a silly party dare now when you're one on one with somebody? I don't know. It's not like the room's watching. And I'm like, I'm going to for the sake of this, I'm going to be this outrageous because I'm going to make this whole entire place go nuts. And it's crazy. No, you're in a, you're in a room, an offshoot room. Yeah. And you're like, watch this silly party dare while you're half in the bag, by the way, this is going to be a silly part. Who's it? Who's silly? Who's daring? I'm going to be honest, like I don't understand it, but like I know people are messed up. So this is pulling from the vault of the show that is my brain. This is a story, not this. There was a story I read a couple years ago now. And it was coming from the ask me anything subreddit. And it was a post that was verified by the moderators of the sub. And it was a post that was titled, I've had a sexual relationship with my mom ask me anything. And the kid now guy, how do they verify verify what? So how could they verify that's true? So the person was a part of a study by this psychologist. The moderators of Reddit got in touch with a psychologist and verified the story. Isn't there a hip, though? It's like the patient signs off on it. So I think they connected with the mods. Either way, it was verified. It's still up. Reddit has strict guidelines about fake stuff, typically. And they verified this. And this person basically tells a story of when I was 16 or 17, I broke both arms. I was super frustrated and mean to my parents. So my mom started jacking me off. And their stories like that, that like, are real? Probably, yeah. Oh my God. So it's like their stories like that. Wait, I'm sorry, but he broke both arms and it was mean to his mom. He was mean. He was like, why did she start doing that to her son? I know, I'll send you the link if you want to read it. I don't know. I don't know if I want to. It seems like a leap, though. Like what about making them some food, putting his feet up, I mean, lending them an ear. Like I wouldn't be my first thought. It'd be a real mean to me. I know you don't have both arms. Let me just let me just do that. Her husband, dad was aware of it. No. And it progressed. It got further than just hand jobs. It was really bad. Oh, well, then they're okay. So they're not a well family. No. Okay. So that the explanation there is that they're all on well. So like, I mean, I find this like I know, you know, Reddit can obviously have fake stories. But like I genuinely, after seeing all I've seen over the past couple of years. Nothing surprises you. No, I could see this happening. Yeah, because it's, but it's not just like a, they've done it before. Oh, yeah. You're not two best friends that are alone in an off-shoot room and you're like, here's a city little dare. No, let me suck you off. And then by the way, the friend to be like, yeah, I'm going to do it. It's like, no, you do this. Yeah. This is like how you are, this is how you're introducing it to her. And it feels like they were trying to test boundaries and be like, if she would have been in it, I feel like they would have been like three some. You want to go to Paris? Like, what do we, what are we talking about? Right, right. Like, I feel like it was definitely. Was that an unfold tower joke? Yeah. Wow. I can't believe I got that. Oh my god. If that was a joke about the thing they told an unfold tower. Yeah. So like on both ends, you high five, I think. I only vaguely knew what that I only kind of, you know, I heard that before. And I can't believe I made the connection. But that was a real. Was that an easy connection to make? Was that like an obvious joke? I don't. Is that something you said before want to go to it? Is that something that they say? I want to go to Paris? I feel like, I feel like this is kind of like a. Oh, well, I feel like a hip that I got with it. Yeah. But I can't, but I, but it, but it, I took a minute. I'm like, no, you got it. I saw the wheels turning. Yeah. So I feel like this is just testing a boundaries. They want to be a throttle or something. Yeah. Yeah. The way he reacted to being confronted with it is, is weird. Which makes me think he's like dealing with some feelings. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. So, and is the question is, is she, is she the, no, this doesn't ask me anything. No, what is this one? It was just like any advice would be helpful. I'm not sure what to do. I haven't talked to my friends because I feel kind of embarrassed. Okay. I saw someone in the comments mentioned what we just mentioned that they were testing boundaries and the person is probably, you know, bisexual and wants to see if she's cool with that. Top comment. Not a silly dare. And your boyfriend is not straight. LOL. Okay. And did she write back? Let's see if we have any comments from OP. OP. Original poster. Okay. So we call them on this side of things. Well, he was trying to see if she was down with OPP. We do have some comments. You know, you know, you know, that song by Nordivania or OPP? No, that one is in. Okay. Is that what OPP? Yeah. You know me. No, you know, the song, the the group, Nordivania or hip hop group from the 90s. Okay. They had a hip hop array. Oh, ghetto bastard. It's a big, that was, that was their first big hit. Okay. And you down with OPP, you know me, stands for other people's property or other people's penis. It's what it was. It was dirty, but that was a clean. And so OP. And so I just made a little, I made a fun little like a reference. Yeah. That was good. Now that I understand, I was throwing one back at you at the end of the Paris one. Yeah. So OP goes, we have talked about sexuality before. I'm by. And he was very clear that he was straight and not interested in men. I guess that makes this feel confusing. I'm reading all the comments as they come in. I feel a little better hearing others say that this was cheating. And I'm not overreacting. He really made me feel like I was being ridiculous. What I have to say to her is, the two months in, and my advice would be taking from the three of them. Bye, bye, bye. I would end it. Yeah. This is confirmed that there was a frat party. Ryan and Jake are in the same fraternity. We all do marching band. And they're in the music frat. I don't know music frats. Well, they're marching to their own drumsticks. We get an update. We have one. Yeah. Oh, finally, if you're watching and you're a fan of the show, do us a favor, please. We need closure on these things. So always send an update. Even if it's not what we want to hear or it's not the the like the last update, continually update. Yeah. Because it's it's only fair. You know, we'll put this out there. We're all listening. We're all consuming this. And we'd like a beginning in the middle of an entity. Yeah. I mean, I don't know if I'm speaking out of turn. No, but I'm just trying to do your own for your own. People love an update. I actually just did a whole episode that basically all had updates. So next time you're on, I will make sure that every single story has an update just to, you know, I'm not sure if you actually work. No, it's easy. It's easy. So update. I broke up with Ryan. He was really annoyed at me and doubled down that he is just a funny guy who goofs around with his friends like that. I didn't want to argue too much. Just insisted that we're done dating. Thanks to everyone who left helpful comments. I was so shocked. And in my head about the situation, I guess I wasn't thinking big picture. I don't want even try working things out with a cheater. Also, I have an appointment this week.
to get STI tested. I'm strict about using protection and this story is the only evidence I have of cheating, but I want to be really safe just in case. Thank you to everyone who posted a funny comment. I'll admit, some of you made me laugh. Some of my friends are on their way over for a boxed girl's wine night. After I debrief them on the breakup, I'll have to show them this post and some of the comments. It's better to laugh than cry, LOL. She means well, I just said, STI is what is that? It's actually transmitted infection. Oh, okay. STD, STI. Well, STD, I know. Yeah, they, and I knew what she was getting at, but I, I never heard STI. They've updated the term. Oh, yeah, because disease is, yeah, like STI, yeah, that's should be what it is. Yeah, come in. I agree with that change. Okay, before you see more Tonka Jihari, I mean, Sal, we're giving you guys a little bonus story. So an extra story, thanks to allie wellness. We've been talking about women's health and wellness a little bit more. And something I want to touch a little bit more on is libido, which is why I've got Justin here. My hubby, hubby? I don't know. We haven't heard that yet. Yeah, we haven't tried that yet. But I feel like something that you can get a little lost in the sauce on is like, you can slip into roommate mode or you're just not lining up when like I want it, you're falling asleep and when you're ready, I'm not in the mood. I'm just not feeling it as much. So that is where allie's love and libido comes in. It's formulated with traditional ingredients like ashwaganda to help boost desire, enhance a rousal, and even support satisfaction. So we're going to get into this story and see how intimacy can be a little touch and go sometimes, but a little effort can go a long way. And I'm really going to need your inputs and hacks to you guys. I saw them for the period, towel time, convo, and it was so good. You guys had such good tips and recommendations. So I'm going to need a lot of input on this one too. Okay. So this is coming from relationship advice, eight months old, titled, I 28 female, want so badly for my libido to increase for my boyfriend, 29 male. What can I do? Okay. What it says in the title. I would love to have such a high libido because I enjoy having sex so much when we have it, but the thought of having it when we're not in the physical act, I just cannot be bothered. I am super attracted to him and I love him more than anything. So the relationship is not to blame. It's literally just me. What can I do to increase? Please supplements, reading spicy books. If so, what ones I'm open to anything I want to have sex with him all the time. Please help. You're just smiling at me. What are your thoughts? I don't know. I can, I just feel like I can relate to both sides. Oh my gosh. Yeah. It would certainly be frustrating that when you want to, you just can't mentally get there or just feels like, oh, it, it sounds really great, but man, I have to do so much to get there and it's a lot of work and tired. I'm hungry after do this. It's like you can almost work against yourself in that way. Yeah. Well, and I think like for me, we just ran into this the other night and I told you you needed to amp up the razzle dazzle. I don't know where this came from. You guys are like, you know, the little razzle dazzle just in a little, this little that because you almost need like a little bit of initiation sometimes from your partner to like get you in the mood. Like I feel like you need to just like get a little butt squeeze or a little come up behind and feel me up. And I like, I need that to almost be like, Oh, okay, get out of your head, get into the mood, get, get in that mindset. And like obviously that's not going to work every time. But I think sometimes you can just like get so like comfortable with like just kind of this like norm roommate mode is easy to fall into, especially us. Like we got so busy with wedding planning and then getting back and cleaning and getting life together. It's like it can be easy to slip into that and just like not even tune into yourself your body, your desires, and like what you want. Just like this person wants it. She's just like, but like my libido, which is where something like Ollie, love and libido could come in. I've been trying it here and there for the past week, just to see what the deal is. And I don't know if Ollie is going to like be using this word, but like at least for me, like I felt like a bit hornier. And they're, I'm so sorry. What? Hornier. So the word? Hornier. Yeah. Okay. I will say you guys, I tried to find a synonym and the other synonyms synonyms that come up are aroused and Randy. So I think Randy, my choice was better. What are you doing, Randy? But I just think it's something that is worth a shot. No one wants to feel disconnected from their partner and like intimacy can be a big part of people's relationships. We do have some really good comments on this one as well. And I know you guys are going to show up and add more. This person goes, I used to struggle with pretty much non-existent libido. And here's what works for me. Less stress, generally speaking, women need to be relaxed to want sex while men can relax through sex, need my workload helped. Preach, right, like literally right there. I'm like, when I get out of my own head and I stop like the mental checklist of like stress and anxiety and things I have to do. Yeah. Then I'm like, okay, no, I'm like tuned back in. Female pleasure, centric, erotica. Is there next recommendation, sensual exercise, dancing or anything that can help you feel more focused on your sexuality and make you horny? There's that word again. Next one goes, have you tried getting yourself in the mood? Obviously, we love intimacy. I think we all do. Everyone loves a good cuddle, a good shag, a good this, a good that, whatever you're into, but wanting it and experiencing it, don't always go hand in hand. Ollie gets that, whether it's love and libido, so you can get yours or period hero for PMS support. I mean, desperate need of that right now. Ollie is wellness that shows up for women. You can find Ollie supplements at retailers nationwide or at allie.com, O-L-L-Y.com. These statements have not been evaluated by the Food and Drug Administration. This product is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease. Can't wait to see your comments and let's get back to sell. Thanks, Ollie. Okay, moving on to this next one. You've got some really, really good tattoos. Oh, I have some bad tattoos. You've got really good tattoos. Bad tattoos. You've got Jaden Smith on your leg. Yeah. Yeah, two. Do you have two Jaden tattoos? Two. How do you, do you still like, do you want to cover up? You still, you like them? It wasn't the spirit of how I receive them. Okay. The joke was that it's funny because they're permanent. I can't admit to jokes. Yeah. It wasn't my joke, but I understand it was funny and so I choose at least thus far to keep them. Do you have like, I've always wondered this when watching the show. Do you guys have like, ground rules for your punishments or is it truly just a free for all? It's a little, I think it's truly a free for all. I think that we, we are good at understanding what the line is. Okay. You know, we go right to it. Yeah. And if we don't know, we have techniques. So for example, we wanted to put leeches on on Murray. Oh, my God. And we didn't know if his take on it. And what we don't want to do is move forward with an idea and find a location and put and write for it and get there and God forbid, you know, he's like, no, because not every punishment is a surprise. Yeah, but a lot are. And so we have to, we have to, you know, take a liberty thinking like, you know, well, they're going to go through with it. Yeah. Or they can go through it. There's been times I wanted to, I physically wasn't able to do it. Even though I really wanted to do it. Okay. And then that is problematic because you can't lose a, that's budget. That budget is out of the window. Yeah. You've got the whole thing. So someone else has to take that punishment. You know what I mean? And we don't want that to happen because that's not really. So what we'll do is we'll go to, we'll go to James and I'll say to him, hey, we have an idea we want to put leeches on cue. And I'll get his temperature. So what it is for you. And so if he's like, oh, that's hysterical. Do it. I'm like, you just made your own bed. You put yourself in that. Yeah. But if he's like, oh, that's, I would, I would talk to him about that because that's like, that's a tough one. And he might not like that. And then you know, like, all right, we probably can't do it to him. Yeah. So there's a little ways to do it. If we don't know what the line is, but we know each other so well. I'm doing the show so long that I think we, we are, we have a, we're a good judge of if like what we can do what we can't do. Do you feel that anyone gets the worst punishments? We all feel we, I will say everyone has bad punishments. Yeah. We all feel like, you know, we'll compete to, we'll, I'll argue. I know what was something like I was electrocuted a lot of times where shocked I should say with like large animal collars all over my body. And I learned learned after this because they did it in one bit. And then they next season they did it again. And then we had a live show where they did it to me for a little bit too. And I only recently learned that I might have taken a couple of, a couple of decades off my life by doing that. Yeah. What if you had a heart condition? Jury is still out.
as to how damaging this was to me. But like, we all, you know, but I will say that historically, cumulatively, I think probably James Murray has gotten at the worst. - Yeah, that was my pick. The nipple piercing was-- - Oh, that's nothing. - That was pretty bad. - Come on, I mean, on a scale. Like, that's a one to me. - Oh, see, I'm like, that one was, that one was bad watching him skydive. - Crydive. - That was like, you could just feel his anxiety. Like, you felt so bad on him. - I did feel bad on that. - But then again, you got put in a room with a tiger and you're like, really scared of cats. - I mean, I just, I'm not gonna do with cats. I was like, that was, I didn't think that would make the movie 'cause I just didn't think it was funny. It was sheer terror and I, I couldn't even speak. - The bear cage was kind of another one. They really like to fuck with you with animals. - Yeah, the bear cage I get, I'm behind a steel cage. They were right here in front of my face, Grizzlies, and they could reach in a little bit, but I do feel like I was tucked away enough that they didn't get into a fight right in front of me, the two bears, and that's unbelievable. But the tiger was on one little chain that was tied to the shower pole. And like, that- - There wasn't a handler in that room. I didn't know that. - I didn't know it at the time. - Yeah, but also what are they gonna be able to do? - What are they gonna do? - It was a tiger. Not knocking her, but it was like an older lady. And she was like, she wasn't like a brick shithouse. She was like a little bit frail, you know what I'm saying? - Well, look what happened to that one guy, Vegas. - With the tiger. - With Roy? - Yeah. - I mean, he has a name more than, he's not that one guy. The man is a headliner in Vegas for like decades. - What are you saying? - No, I mean Roy. - You could've been. - Raised tigers and the thing took him up. Yeah, I mean, if the thing lunged with me, it's gonna rip out the tile and get me. And I don't know what the handle's gonna do. - Nothing. - My first thing I asked was, and I think it stayed in the movie, was like, how did we get insurance for this? I was dead serious. And then I almost couldn't even move. I started to think they sense my fear. So even me not speaking just whatever the pheromones are coming off of me right now, if that's the right word. This thing senses the fear. I didn't understand how, you gotta say, my mind is blown in that scenario. They shoved me into a roadside motel room. I was talking to them and I shoved me in there and closed the door and then there was no knob to get out. And I didn't know, and I just heard a growl. And I literally, I just glued myself to the corner and this thing just nonchalantly walks out. And I just was like, the level of irresponsibility here. Like I, I don't care what someone told you, there is a percentage that I will die from a tiger right now. Like there is, you cannot tell me. No, that I was risky. You can't tell me 100% full proof that I, that something might not go wrong. And I'm like, how in the world can you take this liberty with? Yeah, the chance is never zero. And I was actually as angry as I was terrified in that moment, but like I couldn't move or speak. I was, I was, it was a feeling I've only had two or three times in my entire life event. One time I thought I was going to drown. And one time I misplaced my daughter. So those were like the three most fearful moments I've had in my life. Did you like just place her in a shopping cart and like, we got her. She's fine. Okay. She, no, it was, it was, I was, I just told her it's on a pod. But like she just, we were just loading up the car and vacation. She was standing right next to us. We had extended family all over the place. And I put, and then I looked down. She wasn't there and called her name didn't hear. Ran to the street, ran both ways, ran back into the yard, looked in the pool all the time. My heart beating out of my chest. Oh God. Yeah. Everyone's screaming her name. And as a parent, what you feel in that moment, it blows away the tiger. Yeah. I was about to have a full blown heart attack. I was about to, I mean, I'm break down the most vulnerable. I've ever felt in my life. I don't wish it on anyone. No. And everyone's screaming her name and everyone's dispersed. And this all unfolded within 30 seconds. You know, like not seeing her screaming her name, looking both ways, going down, running down the block, running down the other block, looking in driveways, knowing that a car passed, did someone take her? Is she, in someone's yard, where is she? Did she go in the back? Is she in the pool? Did she go into the pool? Got a bit. Yeah. She's young. And then my wife found her sitting in the SUV that we rented. So she just got in and she heard everyone screaming and didn't say anything. Oh, she was scared. Yeah. So the second I found out that she was in there, my body collapsed. I took a knee on the ground. I had shooting stomach pains and I just started to cry because you know what, something else. It's a real, it's a crazy visceral. It's something that you like, you can't even explain. You can't even explain. It's immediately biological. It's that's happening. And oh my god. And I'm like, I don't wish that I don't, I don't wish that I don't, I wish that I don't, I wish that I don't. No. Really scary. But back to the tattoo. Yeah. This is coming from our slash tattoo advice. And it's titled advice on my grandma's tattoo. The second pick is the layout inspo, hashtag bad tattoo. What do we do? I'm sorry. I don't understand what second pick is the layout inspo meaning. So they included pictures for this one. Oh, good. So I'm going to show you the picture of what the inspiration was supposed to be for the tattoo. Okay. It is a like pop print. What could have seemed you would have lived forever, Charlie, love, okay. And what is that? A framed kind of piece of picture would look like a frame. So you see like this cute little golden retrievers picture in the pop print. A quote, if love could have saved you, you would have lived forever. Charlie's collar with his little dog tag on it. I can't wait for this. And then we get a picture of grandma's tattoo. Okay. Grandma too, huh? Grandma really loved, loved Charlie. So this is the tattoo. Oh, gosh. Can I take this? Yeah. Tell everyone what you're seeing. Wait. Oh, my. Oh. Oh, my God. What does it say? Oh, no. It's not good. It's not good artistically at all. Does that look like a golden retriever? Oh, I was, I thought it was a different type of dog. It was a golden retriever. Golden retriever. This, you would name every single breed of dog before you said golden retriever for this dog. It looks like a Maltese. Yeah. It does. It looks identical to a Maltese. There's nothing on here. Not one thing on here that looks like a gold, not one trait, nothing at all, nothing. Everything else is bad too. The lettering is bad. It's really bad. The kicker here. And by the way, even the letters are crooked. And not don't mean like crooked going the wrong way like like they're miss the spacing is off on the letters. And like one letter will be this way and one letter is a little this way. It's very wabi sobbing. Yeah. It says. Yes. It's like a, it's imperfect. Yeah. It's perfect. And it's imperfection. So I'm, I'm, Robbie Sabi would be a good thing. If love could have saved you, you would, you would have lived forever. Save Dublin. Save Dublin. They person wrote you would twice in a row. And then there's a massive space in between would have and then no space in between lives. And then there's a heart. It looks like that looks like a period after lived. Even though the word forever comes after it. And then there's also one, two, three different fonts. And then there's another heart after love that actually just looks like a birthmark or like a pine cone. And the shading is horrific as well. It's really bad. And I wondered to people like, can people get lawsuits? I always wonder that. Also you would, the first you, first of all, it says if love could have saved you, you would, you would. So the word you is three times out of four words. But the first you and the second you proceeding it immediately are different fonts. It's pretty bad. Yeah. But so also like, where is the head of the tattoo artist? If you wrote you would, like, you're not good, it's not like you're jotting it quickly down. No, don't they like map it out on like a piece of paper and then like stick it to you and then that ink transfers. But this is screaming like, you know, when you're trying to make a sign in school and you don't leave enough space and at the end it's like the one word has like seven letters in this one. This screams that it's giving free hands. Yeah, it's it's oh, it's free hand without a doubt. But like how do you not realize that you it's not even just you, it's not like you would would. It's you would you would you start by the way, you start on the second you. You're already now you're adding a second you right where it shouldn't be. You don't notice about the second would even. You would you have they must have been on drugs. Yeah, like something I do wonder if because I because I follow an Instagram page with bad tattoos. Oh, the cover ups are crazy. And I do wonder if people can get have a lawsuit. But I guess what how much are you going to sue for because it's like it's not just a price of the tattoo, though, you're you're you're permanently embarrassed or what have you. But apparently you can sue a tattoo artist for certain types of harm such as infection from unsanitary practices.
an allergic reaction or if the final tattoo is demonstratably different from what was agreed upon. - Well, there you are, right there. - So, I'd say yeah. - So yeah, I mean, or stupidity. It's stupidity should be a man, but. - It should be. - Let's demonstrate the difference. Not, it's extra worse. - I think the same dog. - Yeah, that's crazy. - But it's like, what do you think, granny? - Would you sue this person for though? - I don't know. - I can't, I can't, that person, I don't think they have much to give. - I don't, I don't think so and it's like, I think grandma, like, oh, this is really dark, but like, granny, just granny wanna go through a cover-up or just like deal with this for the rest of her days, you know? I don't know. - Oh, man. - Pretty bad. - That's bad. - Pretty bad. - The person wants to know what they should do. - Yeah, and so like. - That's their grandma, this is the grandma writing. - This is their grandma. So they're like, maybe the grandma's not online. - Is the inference that the grandmother hasn't noticed? - No, I think grandma's noticed and is upset. - Okay. - And just basically people are just like, yeah, it's understandable why she would be very upset. And the next comment, yeah, that's a shit tattoo. But if she's not agreeing with it and if you or she can't pay to cover it, keep it to yourself for the most part and tell her to find a different artist. - By the way, it's on the grandma's entire arm from her shoulder to her elbow. - It is a massive tattoo, massive. - Which is wild in the first place. To get a tattoo that big and then just, would she throw a rock and whoever it hits, she's like tattoo me? - Probably. - This person cannot have worked as an establishment. This screams out of my basement. Ah, that sucks. That's a tattoo artist. I wonder if they have like, they wake up in the middle of the night and cold sweat. Because that's a mental error. - Do you think the bad ones would care? Or do you think like they're so like, I did good work today? - Yeah, even like a tattoo artist worked their salt. I wonder if that's like a common theme. Like they wake up like, oh my god. Like I accidentally doubled up a word and something like that. I probably would have that. - I mean, I would. I had like server nightmares. Like where you're like, even still, you're like, oh my god, I forgot the water for that table in your dreams. You're just like, ugh. - I used to buy 10. I've had dreams where I work a full full. Nothing, you know when you're like a dream, you're like, how's it your house? But it wasn't your house. And then, you know, Matthew McConaughey was there. - Yeah. - And then, you know, we rode a bicycle. Like I had dreams where I clock in for a bartending shift and I work an eight hour shift and then wake up. It feels like I worked an eight hour shift. - Yeah, you don't have that. - And I'm like literally like filling up the ice, wiping down a thing like, I felt it in real time. - Do you ever wonder if you're living in another reality? - All the time. - There's people that get sucked into their dreams for months. Like that's a real thing. Where they go to sleep for one night and in their dream, they live for like two months in their dreams. And they have a boyfriend, a different apartment. They've got like sometimes kids in those other like dream worlds. Like they get locked in. - I've never heard that that's fascinating. - Yeah. - It's a big thing. - It's a big thing. - Oh my gosh. - I know. Okay, I'm giving you a choice on this last one I have for you. Option number one. Am I the asshole for making a joke after my fiance got a speeding ticket or option two, which I have read at one of our live shows, walked in on my mom eating my dad's ass and I want to die. (laughing) - Oh my god. I don't know if I'm equipped for the second one. It got to go the second one. I mean, it gives the people what they want. - Okay, so this is good. - If I would have chose the first one, I would have just heard the yelling, come on. - Screaming in your ear. - Yeah. - Oh god. - I'll still read the first one for you guys on a different episode. You'll still get it. - Oh god, it's almost like I'm punishing myself here. - You are. - This is crazy talk. This is crazy. Oh god. All right, I'm bracing for this. I thought we wouldn't, I mean, I thought we heard it all. - No. - Woo, let's go. - This is coming from our slash true of my chest. Again, titled, "Walked in on my mom, 56 female, eating my dad's 58 male ass." - That's such a funny way to type in that. It's like a police, it's like a police report. - And I can police report. You sound like an officer. - I know. And I want to die. - It's so funny too. They're like, I don't even, I don't know if the parents ages are necessarily relevant there. - But it makes it worse. - Yeah, it does, you're right. It makes it worse. - It makes it worse. - I'm still shaking up about it, and I haven't. - 56F and, and what? - 58 male. - 56F, 58M, all right. - I'm still shaking up about it, and I haven't been home since. It happened last night when I was scrolling on my phone. I noticed my battery was low, and remember, that I lent my charger to my mom earlier that day. So I went to my parents' bedroom, and I didn't hear anything strange before entering. - How are you, how are you eating your spouses' ass when all the family is home? - That's like, you gotta wait 'til they go to work. You gotta wait 'til they go on, maybe on a walkabout. I would wait until my daughter's like, I know what, I wanna find myself an Amsterdam. I'll be back in six months. Then I eat, yes. You can't be an ass when someone's downstairs. You're playing with fire. This is insane. They deserve what they got. - But nothing could have prepared me for what the site I saw was. I don't wanna get into detail, because I'm still pretty scarred. But basically, my mom was eating my dad's ass. I was so fucking traumatized that I closed their door immediately. - I'm traumatized. - And ran back to my room. I don't know what to make of that imagery. At times, I felt like I was gonna have a full-blown panic attack, but I eventually calmed down after a little while, and luckily enough, I found my old charger in my drawer. (laughing) - So the story has a happy ending. - I love that she loves me. She found the charger at the end of it. Oh my God. - I've been at my friend's house. - It could've been worse. - So it could've been worse. She's gonna see it and then not found the other charger. - Not been able to go on TikTok. I've been at my friend's house since this morning, and I have no idea how I'm gonna come home. My parents called me a few times, but I don't think I can call them back for the time being. - Even in anonymity, it takes balls to type this into this. 'Cause you're putting it out, you're legitimizing it. - I know. - You typing it? And now we've taken it, and now we're talking about it, and it just makes it more real. I would almost start to make myself believe it was an illusion. - It was a bad dream. I had a gummy. - Yeah. - It didn't happen. What? - Yeah. - No, no. - Now, so, okay, this is something I need to know. Was this like a, and the parents didn't know, or did the parents know that she saw it? - We don't have any invention of that. - I'm not in that detail. God damn it. (laughing) - Top comment. That's why we got a knock on doors before entering Comrad. - Yeah. - Yeah. - Comrad, Russian replied. - Yeah, that's just, that's their vibe. - That's tough, man. You take that to the grave. - Apparently, like, I'm trying to find the original sub because this was pulled from a screenshot I have, and this does happen quite often to people. - You can't find your charger and you see there's eating in fact. - A lot of people walk in and see people eating each other's asses. This one is five months old. - I can, I mean, it's, - The specificity is like, I walk down and I'm having sex. - Yeah. - But it's like. - No, it's eating ass. - By the way, this wasn't a problem even over 10 years ago. Maybe even five. This is a new trend I'm hearing now that's like, - Ass eating. - I mean, if you got F-56 and M-58's doing it, - But honestly, it was never what it was. I don't even think, - Good for that. - I don't even think it occurred to anybody prior to 2016. - Ass eating? - Yeah. - I had a college roommate that broke up with a guy because he asked her to give him a rim job. And that was back in like 2013. - Just what I'm saying, it was unheard of. - Yeah. - He was gonna put himself out there back there. He was really about three, four years, it would've been a discussion. - It would've been fine. - Yeah. - I don't know what to do because that person now, till the day she leaves, even when she doesn't want, not that she ever wants to, but like that's gonna be an intrusive thought that can pop into her head at any given moment in time. - Every time you locate your parents. - And it's gonna be quite some time in the immediate that she can look her parents even in the eyes and not think of that. - Imagine if mom tries to give her, or him, like a little kiss. Love you, babe. - Yeah. - Love you, sweetie. - Oh Lord. - Don't come near me with that mouth, mom. - Yeah. - What I would have to do, what I would have to do. First of all, thank God, my parents divorced when I was four. (laughing) What I would have to do is I would have to soul search. I had to sit down and say, you know what? I'd have to make it so that I could say, good for them. Good for them. - Yeah. - Who am I to judge? I mean, like, come on here. We're all, we're all got our things. - Yeah, everyone's got the kinks. - And they're their own people. And this is going on everywhere right now. And so be it. - Yeah. - So be it. I don't know how I get there mentally. Also, in order to get there mentally, you got to think about it. So you're going to really be banging that around in your head in order to get there. And if you don't get there, then you're just really digging a whole deeper. But that's tough, man. That is tough. - The way you come to terms with it. - That was the closer. - It was the closer. It was good. If you want to feel a little bit better, you go on.
in the subreddit dead bedrooms, which is all these people that have no intimacy anymore, haven't had sex in like five years, they're still together. And then you look at it and you're like, well, at least my parents are still having fun. - This is the thing, dead bedroom. I'm not on Reddit, so I don't really know. - That one's yes, it's tough. - It's a whole world without that. - It is a rabbit hole. - So what is her, what is coming up of this, you just let us know? - That's it. - She had to let us know that. - That's it, that's all I got. - Wow. - It was just a true off my chest. I just had to share with someone because if I have to live with it, other people need to know. - I guess I guess that because it would never occur to me to see that or any of these experiences you said, then run and like be like. - I mean, you're not gonna tell your real life friends, they'll judge you forever. You tell the internet, where it's anonymous. - Right, the one thing I would love to know if the parents knew that this person saw. But I'm. - Hoping it was quick. And she was, you know, mom's head was, you know, very deep and dad maybe was down and doggie. - Well, we don't know what the angle is. I mean, if I'm just going over to my head, it could have been the various different ways it could have happened. Let's hope that dad was not all fours facing the door. - Fingers crossed. - Right. - Fingers crossed. Sal, thank you so, so much for coming on. You are on tour right now. - Yes, I am on tour. You can get tickets at my website, savocanocomedy.com. - It's that everything's fine to her. - Yeah, everything's fine to her. So if you saw my special tariff eye, which is streaming on HBO Max, this is 100% new material. I got like 30 or 40 cities up now, but I'm touring all the way through 2027. I'm touring this for since 2024. - Whoa. - So yeah, so if you don't see your city, I'm getting to every single city. Just check back eventually. - Oh my God. - But I have some bigger shows coming up, November 14th I'm at the Chicago Theater. And November 15th in the Hamilton, Wisconsin, December 27th of the Beacon Theater in New York City. So notable ones. The Rhyman Theater in Nashville, April 12th. I'm in Austin, February 1st, Atlantic City, February 28th, and so on and so forth. - In the Minnesota Stamps. - Minnesota? - I was there. I was there recently already. I am going to Rockchester, Minnesota. - Okay. - And there might be, there might be another minute, but I was in mini. But I'm also have a new talk show coming up called Minoosh. - Ooh. - Yeah, and that'll be out on YouTube on my channel and on where you get podcasts. Late fall early winter. - Yeah, I love that. - This is a fun one. It's sure for Minoosh. It's a really absurd tongue-in-cheek interview show. It's like really, really big guests, really, really small talk. - Okay. - And it goes in and out of conversation and sketch comedy. - I love that. - I'm working on it. I'm shooting it in 10 episode seasons. So I'm shooting the first season now. - That's amazing. - And yeah, what else? And Joker season 12 was there in TBS. - I love it. - Yeah. - All of Sal's links will be in the description. Check everything out. Go get a ticket to one of his shows. Funny guy. - Thank you. She's so much fun. - Okay, I'm so glad you joined it. - I would love to come back. I'll have you back and I will only give you updates. - That's on you. I don't want to put that on. - No, it's easy. - But I won't, I won't, you know, get mad if you did that. - Okay, I'll do that for you. Until next time, guys. Bye. (upbeat music) (upbeat music)
Podcast Summary
Key Points:
A storyteller shares a series of humorous and relatable personal missteps, including microwaving socks, getting superglue in a belly button, and attempting to "mow on the toilet."
The stories highlight everyday absurdities and their unintended consequences, often leading to embarrassment, medical costs, or family conflict.
One incident involves a brother-in-law prank that results in ER treatment, sparking a debate over accountability and whether the behavior was justifiable.
A coworker’s extreme sensitivity to smells leads to a conflict with office rules, raising questions about workplace boundaries, harassment, and mutual respect.
A couple’s vacation photos are edited to remove the wife, sparking outrage over authenticity, trust, and emotional erasure in relationships.
A young woman recounts being caught by her boyfriend during a "silly party dare" involving him sucking his friend’s dick, leading to confusion, hurt, and questions about loyalty.
The narratives collectively explore themes of boundaries, empathy, and personal integrity in social and romantic contexts.
The host emphasizes humor, self-reflection, and the importance of accountability, framing these stories as both entertaining and revealing of human behavior.
Summary:
The transcription features a collection of humorous and emotionally charged personal anecdotes shared by a host and guest. The stories revolve around everyday blunders—like microwaving wet socks, getting superglue in a belly button, or being caught in a party dare—that lead to physical discomfort, financial strain, or emotional fallout. One story highlights a brother-in-law’s prank resulting in medical expenses, prompting discussion on responsibility and family dynamics.
Another centers on workplace conflict stemming from a coworker’s extreme sensitivity to smells, raising concerns about harassment and boundaries. A third story reveals a partner editing her out of vacation photos, sparking outrage over authenticity and emotional erasure in marriage. The final anecdote involves a boyfriend claiming a party dare was just a joke, causing confusion and distress for the woman involved.
These stories collectively explore themes of accountability, emotional boundaries, and human vulnerability, delivered with a mix of humor, empathy, and sharp observation. The host frames them not just as jokes, but as reflections on how people navigate missteps, relationships, and personal integrity in real life. Each narrative illustrates the complexity of social interactions and the importance of honesty, respect, and empathy.
FAQs
The person soaked their socks after a rainstorm and put them in the microwave for two minutes. The synthetic material melted, causing smoke that triggered a fire alarm and evacuated the office. The microwave was ruined, and the person now has a permanent nickname: 'Hot Socks'.
The person was not the 'asshole' for taking him to court. The prank caused significant pain, medical bills, and emotional distress. The brother-in-law's refusal to pay and his dismissal of the incident as a joke make the behavior inappropriate, and the person acted reasonably by seeking legal recourse.
Yes, it is unreasonable. The coworker repeatedly walking up to desks to smell people and making a scene is excessive and disruptive. The person who uses deodorant has a right to wear it, and the office should find a compromise, like using unscented soap, rather than escalating to harassment.
The person tried a deep 'mow' while on the toilet and found it helped relax their pelvic floor. Their husband caught them mid-action and was shocked, leading to a moment of shared laughter and embarrassment. The experience is now a funny, albeit awkward, memory.
Yes, it is inappropriate and deeply disrespectful. Removing the partner from photos because she looked 'tired' or 'bad' shows a lack of trust and emotional connection. It suggests the partner is seen as an afterthought and undermines the authenticity of shared memories.
No, it was not a harmless joke. The act of having a sexual encounter in front of the girlfriend, even if claimed to be a 'party dare,' crossed a boundary. It caused significant emotional distress and confusion, and the response—'just guys being guys'—was dismissive and invalidating.
Chat with AI
Loading...
Pro features
Go deeper with this episode
Unlock creator-grade tools that turn any transcript into show notes and subtitle files.
PodcastTranscript AI