212: I'm Pregnant...

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Compounded medications are not FDA approved. Eligibility determined by a licensed provider. Individual results may vary. See website for details. Welcome back to this week's episode of Unlocked. And yes, it is just me. This may not be our typical solo episode because I have been holding some things back for a little while now. And I feel like now I'm at the time and place to be able to share those things. I have a lot of stuff to talk to you guys about and I am so excited. I'm definitely being a bit vulnerable on this podcast, but I feel like I just wanted to get past a few different hurdles and then it would be my time to share. You know, I shared just about everything with you guys, but I have learned that in order to protect my own peace, I had to keep things closer to the chest for a little while. And that's just for my own mental health and wellbeing and safety. That's not to say that I wasn't gonna tell you. Obviously I am, but I've had to learn proper boundaries when it comes to when I share things and when the right time is. So today, it's one of those days. And well, here we go. You guys know I have spoken about Mystery Man on the podcast for a while now. I have stated that he is much older than me. And but other than that, I've kept things really, really quiet. There's been a few times that TMZ, has called us in the Cayman Islands, which is absolutely insane. Like out of all places, my happy place, the Cayman Islands, but it's because people have taken pictures and sent in tips. I just, if you're one of those, please just let people be, okay? That's all I'm gonna say. Let people enjoy their time. But other than that, things have been really, really quiet. And I've really enjoyed it being that way. I feel like he and I, have truly gotten to be just us and create our safe space and get to a really good place with each other. And when I say that it's our relationship as a whole has been absolutely amazing. It has been the dream relationship that any woman could ever hope to be in. There hasn't been drama and chaos and dysfunction. There has been absolutely none of that. But obviously you just want that time to, you know, that time for you too. And we've had that. And so we've been together for, since last July, and we have had the best time in the entire world. We have traveled literally all around the world. Well, I guess starting in the US, right? We've gone so many different places, New York and California, Florida. I really can't even, Chicago, I think so many different places we've traveled to. But then outside of the US, we've gone to our happy place, which is the Cayman Islands. We've gone to London, Switzerland, Italy, Turkey, Greece. We've had, we have had so many amazing experiences and I will forever hold those so close to my heart. And we've just had a blast. Obviously we've gone through some hard things and we've made it out on the other side. Just so much stronger with so much more understanding and empathy. And I think for me, I'm in my very feminine era. Like it feels so good to be able to be soft. It feels so good to finally meet your partner to where you don't have to be that way anymore. You don't always have to be on guard. You don't always have to be the one fixing everything. When you find someone who's willing to do just as much as you will do in a relationship, it is the best feeling in the entire world. And going back to how we met, we met in the world of politics. And the first time we met, I mean, obviously I was like, hey, he's attractive. Yeah, he's really hot. I saw him and just, I thought he was just gorgeous. Like just a gorgeous specimen, okay. And then I didn't really know what to think of him at first. I also, during this point in time, I was still fighting for pardons for my parents. I had kids, I, all these things were happening. And then when mom and dad got pardoned, I got a text message that said like, congratulations, you did it. It was actually really funny 'cause I went back and found the text messages last night because he and I were just going back and rereading them. It's, I find it really funny that we do that. So the first text, the first text that Jason sent me was, hey, Savannah, it's just incredible what you did for your family. You never stopped, fearless person, congratulations. Like, he texts me that on June 1st and I didn't think anything of it really. If I'm being honest, I didn't really see it. If you look at my phone, I still have 718 unread text messages. So I know that's a whole thing in itself, but I never saw it. And I responded June 10th. So nine days later, and I was like, I responded. And then there we went. We just were texting back and forth. And then when we truly started digging deep into things, it was so much stronger of a connection than either of us ever thought was there. And like, yes, I thought he was attractive other than that, like, I wasn't worried about it. And then we went on our first trip to Cayman and we extended the trip and had the best time in the entire world. And I'm like, I think I really liked this person. And the first time he said, I love you, I was like, I hurt you. Yeah, I did say that. I, you know, I don't know. I was confused, okay? I've made no bones. I've made no bones about it, right? Like I went through a really sad breakup and I wasn't expecting to meet someone. And then I met someone right in the midst of like my heartache and heartbreak and confusion. So I didn't know what to do. I just knew I felt this insane attraction and emotional pull to this person. And I feel like that's what God does, right? Like in the midst of hurt and heartache, someone can come into your life and show you why it never worked out with the last person or the people before that. And that's exactly what Jason did. And he came into my life and loved me, respected me, gave me my time. He, the man has never even raised his voice at me, okay? Like that, and which is the fact that we as women have to say like, not even women, I will say in general, men and women, we should not be excited about someone not raising their voice at you, like men and women both, because it happens on both sides. That should just be a given. But he is just the kindest, most amazing human being ever. So knowing that we got to keep that like safe and sacred between the two of us is pretty awesome because we have some insane memories and I will, they will forever be some of my favorites. I think with Jason, like, yes, things were very different than anyone that I've ever dated. I went from being with someone who was older, but who had kids, right? So that relationship was very different and it was special in its own right. But then meeting Jason and having someone so secure with who they are, like he is so secure that he has never one time felt threatened by me or my opportunities. He's always pushed me. I mean, one of my favorite stories to tell is when I was in Rome by myself, well, Grayson was with me. And when I was there, we went out to dinner and there was this waiter, he was very cute, but he was like making my pasta in this little cheese wheel. And he was flirting with me the whole time. He was taking like 10 times longer than he took at any other table. And then he starts feeding it to me. He was like, open your mouth. And I'm like, okay. And so he starts feeding it to me. And then he asked me if I wanted wanted to go on a Vespa ride, okay, once he got off work. And I'm dying. Grayson's dying. It's hilarious. I'm texting Jason this. And Jason's like, you gotta go. And I'm like, what? He's like, you're only there once. Like, go have fun. Obviously, that's not like, hey, go, you know, be intimate with this person, go. But he what I love is that he trusted me enough to be like, oh, I know she's not going to do anything. Like, go have fun. Go do whatever. Like, I trust you. And it takes someone who is so confident and secure within themselves to be like, yeah, go do that. You only live once. Enjoy this experience. And I also like to say in a world full of Ferraris that got offered a Vespa. So there's that too. And Italy. But, you know, it's fine. It's fine. He was cute. And I love a Vespa. Okay. Welcome to Lone Star Casino, a free to play winner's paradise packed with pure excitement and all the Vegas thrills right at your fingertips. Claim your welcome reward today. Visit LoneStarCasino.com for more details and download our app. Lone Star Casino is a free to play social casino board with prohibitive. 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And I like to think that I have such a servant's heart that like I'm going to do for people and I want them to feel good, despite me not getting it back, maybe. And for the first time in my life, I feel like I'm not always giving and not receiving, which is such a great feeling and such a safe feeling. And if I'm being honest, I feel like a lot of those childhood wounds that I have, a lot of them have been healed by Jason, by giving me such a safe space to show up and be who I am and to work through the hard things. And a lot of these things came to the surface, obviously, as I'm writing my book with HarperCollins. It's reliving some really, really traumatic moments in my life. And even in the midst of reliving those, like, there have been a night or two to where I've had insane nightmares and I wake up and it's like to see how Jason handles that. And it's like, he feels so helpless and so sad that I had to endure these things at one point in my life. And just the level of empathy that he has. I mean, I've been with people who are like, I don't know what to say or I don't know what to do or, you know, and obviously people process things in their own way. But for me, I needed someone who could understand these things. I needed someone who could show up for me and help me maybe heal those parts that still weren't quite there yet. And not even by him doing anything to intentionally heal those things, right? Because I don't believe it's someone's responsibility to heal all your broken pieces. That's too much to put on anyone. But just Jason being the person that he is helped me to heal a lot of those parts. Like, helped me to heal a lot. And it's just creating that safe space for me to be vulnerable. And I mean, I knew, like, sitting in the Cayman Islands at the Ritz-Carlton, we have our little booth at this bar and I will never forget him looking at me. We stayed there till like four o'clock in the morning, just sitting there and talking. And he looked at me and was just saying how much he loved me and how he did not expect to fall in love with me. Like, it just happened. And he doesn't want to not say it because, you know, maybe you shouldn't say it this early on. But it was like, regardless of whether you feel this way or not, thank you for allowing me to feel this way, is how he approached it. And it was just the most amazing feeling in the end. The entire world. I cannot even explain it. Like, the relationship that I'm in and the person that I've met is, it's what I hope for every single person out here, man and woman, to find that person that makes them feel the way that I feel right now. And I think of my future kids. Like, I want to show them what a healthy relationship looks like. And they're going to see that. And if I can be a positive example to my sons of what they're going to see, I'm going to show them what a wife should be like. And if Jason can be a positive example to our daughters of what a husband should be like and vice versa, then that's all that we could ever hope for. And I, I'm just so happy, okay? Like, I'm finally in my happy era and it's taken a lot for me to get here. I really want to talk about the ingredients list for a second. Most of what we put on our faces every single day has a list that is so long. And you can't even pronounce half of it. Your skin is your body's largest organ, which is one of my favorite facts. So it's taking in all of those ingredients that we really don't even know what they are. So much of what's on the shelf is loaded with fillers and artificial fragrance that you would never even know about unless you actually read the label. That's why I've been using the Tupes & Co Glow Serum. 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That's TempoMeals.com/unlocked for 60% off your first box. TempoMeals.com/unlocked. Rules and restrictions may apply. I have really struggled of like, "When's it going to happen for me?" I see so many people getting married and having kids and living this picturesque lifestyle and white picket fence and all of these things. And for me, that's not going to happen. That's not going to happen for me. And for so long, I thought it's just not going to happen. Mom and dad aren't going to be here for these moments and those moments. And maybe I'm just not going to find the right person. And I'm here to tell you that if you're in that place in life, I get it. It's so hard. And it's so hard to celebrate other people's happiness at times. I'm just going to be 110% real. It may sound bad. And you can externalize, internally celebrate their happiness, but internally, it's killing you. I know that feeling. But my dad told me something to the extent of like, Like, you do know that being envious of their life isn't going to make your dreams come true any faster. And that really hit me. And it's not even an intentional thing. It just happens because sometimes we want something so badly. And when it's not coming true, it's such a letdown. But your time is coming. I mean, I am almost 30, but and for me, I'm like, oh, my God, almost 30. This is coming from the girl that at 18 thought she was going to be like married and pregnant by 20. OK, like that was just it. So it doesn't matter what age, what gender, what whatever. And I hope that I can be a reminder to you that my story can be a reminder to you like your time is coming just like my time came. So back in December, so Jason, I started dating in July. So August, September, October, November, five months. Timing means nothing. Guys, OK, but back in December, Jason and I were in the Cayman Islands and little did I know he had a ring in his backpack. But I so, OK, let me OK, you all know I'm a snooper. I actually didn't have to snoop this time, though. Jason was getting a charger out of his backpack. I think I called him in the other room. He came in there and then he left a box on the counter. I was like, oh, my God, is that what I think it is? But I didn't know to be, you know, 100 percent. And we were there. We ended up going to this little island called Little Cayman, or as locals say, Cayman. But we went to this little island. There's like 100 people who live on the island. The school is not even operating because there's no kids that live on the island. It is extremely secluded. So we left that morning and then we were coming back that afternoon. LoneStarCasino.com is an absolutely free to play social casino with thousands of games, daily bonuses, free spins and jackpots that pop. Like fireworks. LoneStar Casino is a free to play social casino. Play bold, win big. And I will never forget like that morning. It was just the most magical morning. We got up. It was super early. We go to the airport and we're just so lovey with each other. It's the safest feeling I've ever felt in my entire life. And we go to Little Cayman. We get on these kayaks. We had a little cooler and a speaker and we went out in the middle of the ocean and it was like literally the water was up to our waist. It was insane. And we sat there literally like for hours, listen to music. And we talked and we explored all these little bitty islands. It was the coolest thing ever. And when we were doing that, there was a point in time to where I saw that he was like distracted. And I'm like, what is going on? I didn't think anything of it, but little did I know he was texting my friend Ashley, who is a local on the big island. And she's, she has so many different jobs. She is such a hustler. I love her. She's such an amazing party planner and she's so well connected. But he was texting her and was like, it's got to happen here. And she's like, I don't know. He's like, I'll make it happen. Where's the ring? And she went to the condo, went through his bags, got the ring and took a helicopter to Little Cayman. And then she notified us. She was like, my cousin's the pilot of your flight this afternoon. Your flight's delayed. So you have another hour. And I'm like, yes, this is great. And obviously, like, you know, we had been having drinks all day. We're just having the best time in the entire world. OK, like that is my happy place. Jason is my safe space. It was amazing. We had so much fun. And then I'm like, all right, well, we have another hour. Obviously, he knew what was going on. I didn't. And when he I'm looking at the clock and then I look back up and I'm like, oh, my God, the flight takes off in 30 minutes. I'm like, we got to go. And this is like the. Airport's a shack, like one little bitty outhouse type deal. The plane is maybe 12 people can fit on it. It's tiny. So you don't have to go through security. None of that doesn't exist there. And so I'm like, we got to go. So, guys, I swear, I looked like I was in the Olympics. OK, at least in my mind, I did. I'm rowing. We got to go. And little I know he's behind me just like laughing. Like, where does she think she's going? And we come up. We come up to shore and he's like, hey, babe, come over here. And I see flowers and champagne and I just think he's being sweet, like had no idea in my mind, because keep in mind, I had been in the ocean all day. I was in a swimsuit. I had hair, makeup not done. None of that. So I had no idea. I was just like, oh, my God, he's being sweet, like because he is a very thoughtful, genuine, sweet person. I mean, I cannot tell you guys how many hands. Written letters I have. And it's not just like on a piece of paper. He loves to go to a paper source. That's his favorite place. He loves to go to paper source, pick out all these fun, cute little cards. And like he wrote me one the other day and it says, I all of you or something. Or it's like all of you. But it's like, I love you. Like he just it's my favorite thing in the entire world. So the. The amount of cards I have like that are insane. And he's just a very thoughtful person. So I just think flowers and champagne. This is great. Thank you. And so we go. He was like, come over here for a second, babe. I was like, OK, but we got to go. And so we sit down and he pours the champagne. I chug it. And I was like, all right, we really got to go. Little did I know he's looking all around because he didn't know where Ashley had hid the ring. And he's freaking. Out like, oh, my God, this ring. Is somewhere in the sand. He like thought he had lost it. He's like, this is not good. This is bad. The look he saw I saw on his face was hilarious. I still didn't know. That's why he was looking for. And then he picks up his phone and text someone. She's like in the tree and the tree she had hit it and like one of the palms. And when he gave me the ring, he was like, before I open this, I just want. You to know that this is just an expression of love to you. This can be whatever you want it to be. This can be an engagement ring, a promise ring, a cocktail ring for all I care. I just want you to know how much I love you. And there was no pressure ever put on me to like, you have to accept this is this or obviously I wanted to like, yes, it happened really quick, but. It's it is what it is, right? Like timing means nothing. I feel like you could find out more about a person in three months than you did in a whole year of being with them. Like it just is what it is. And so when he opened that ring box, I was like, Oh my gosh. And I'm like trying not, I mean, I'm crying, but I think I'm just in such shock. Like tears start coming down, but I'm still in shock. I'm like, no, no, there's no way. And. Which obviously like, yes, my ring is insane and I love it and it's everything I've ever wanted, but I also love the meaning behind it. I love how much time Jason took into designing this ring and sitting down and telling one of my best friends, Nicole, who's our jeweler, telling her everything that I want. And I just, I'm so grateful for both of them. And I love the meaning behind it. I love how Jason. Has worked his ass off to be able to give me such an amazing ring and wants to pour into me and love me. And that proposal was just right. It was everything I've always said. Number one, like I need to be hair and makeup ready. I need to look good. This that that means absolutely nothing when it's for the right reasons. Like I would not trade that moment for anything in the entire world because it was us. It was us. In our happy place. And it was such a spur of the moment thing for him because he's like, wait, I need to do it here. Like this is us. And for that, I absolutely love him. But obviously in true Savannah fashion, I'm like in the back of my mind, I'm like. Look, and I'm like, we've really got to go. I'm like, if we miss this flight, we are stuck here for the night. He's like, babe, we're fine. We're fine. Just give it a minute. And so then we go, we jump in the car to head to. the airport and we're pulling up to the airport as we pull up there goes our plane. It was like, I'm like, I look at him. I was like, oh God, there's our plane. There's our plane. And little, and then Ashley's like driving to the side and pulling up to a helicopter because Jason had gotten a helicopter to take us back to the main Island. And it was, it was just the most magical, amazing experience of the entire world. It was all filmed. And so we have videos of it, photos of it, and that's just us. And I absolutely love him for who he is and creating those special moments for us. And I, that is my life. Okay. So in all the silence that I've been giving, I've been living a lot of life and I've been enjoying it for myself. And yes, there is a huge age gap there. Okay. But, and that's probably, part of the reason I kept a lot of it quiet because I know how brutal the public can be, but I genuinely do not care because I have always said I would rather 20 phenomenal, unbelievable years with someone than 50 just years. Like the amount of love and respect that we have. We have so many dreams and we dream together. We work together. We, aren't these, this couple that like, yes, we have our friends, but we would rather be with each other all the time. Like we want to have life experiences with each other. And I think that's when, you know, you have the right person when you don't feel like you have to escape them at times. Like he is my best friend. We do everything together. Whether it's take a break from work, go have lunch. We work together on things. Um, we just literally everything. Okay. We brush our teeth together. We just ever anything that you could do with someone we do. And it's just such an amazing, fulfilling feeling to finally find your person and I'm there. So yes, the age difference. So what? I don't care. Let me tell you, he does not look his age, nor does he act his age. Um, his body is great. Uh, his mind is even sharper. So I really don't care. Okay. Like this person is the love of my life and it made all the heartbreak that I've gone through worth it. And all the heartbreak taught me something. It taught me what I want, what I don't want, what I should accept, what I shouldn't accept. So there's no heartbreak that ever goes wasted. In my opinion, like it teaches you something if you allow it to teach you something. And then it allows you to appreciate it. And then it's, it's a great way to get to know yourself and to be able to be a better person when they do come along. So for that, I am super grateful. Lone Star Casino. You're right where you belong. LoneStarCasino.com. Lone Star Casino is a free to play social casino board with prohibitive visit LoneStarCasino.com for more details and download the app. LoneStarCasino.com. You don't need to visit with a physician in person to become eligible. Orderly Meds has a simple virtual process. Connect with licensed medical professionals who can determine whether a GLP-1 treatment may be appropriate for you wherever you are. Getting started from the comfort of home online. Change your habits and consider a new approach to feeling your best. Visit OrderlyMeds.com to learn more. OrderlyMeds.com. Gain confidence and choose better habits this fall. Eligibility required and determined by a licensed provider. I have done so much therapy and I'm going to be really honest with you. It's a big reason I'm in the place I am today. It's not a one and done thing either. Trust me when I say that. Healing never ends. So that means I'm still in the thick of it. And I'm grateful I have that space to keep doing the work. I know not everybody has a therapist that can do the work. And so many people never even start because finding one who actually takes your insurance feels impossible. You use your insurance to take care of your physical health. So why wouldn't you use it for your mental health? That's what Rula is for. Rula is a healthcare company that works with over 100 insurance plans. And the average copay is just $15 per session. Rula helps you find a licensed therapist who fits your goals and preferences and appointments are available at orderlymed.com. are available as soon as tomorrow. So if you're in a hard season right now or you're watching everybody else get the thing that you've been praying for and it's eating you up inside, please talk to someone. 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During your virtual appointment, a doctor reviews your health history and goals and, if clinically appropriate, may discuss prescription treatment options as part of a personalized plan. Those options can include GLP-1 medications like Trizepatide, as well as wellness therapies such as NAD, depending on what your provider determines is right for you. Every treatment plan is individualized, medically guided, and based on your specific needs. Not trends or one-size-fits-all solutions. I'm the founder of Good Girl Rx, and this is my personal experience. For me, the biggest shift wasn't just physical. It was finally feeling heard, supported, and honestly, cared for without shame. Everyone's journey is different, results vary, and not everyone qualifies. but access to real medical guidance can be life-changing. I'm really excited to build this life with Jason. I am doing this podcast from our living room in our house. We've worked really hard on this house. We bought it. we redid a lot of things. We the way that we furnished it with our designer, Kim Biggs, she's awesome. We absolutely love her. And then obviously, my dad's come in and put some final touches on it, which we love and we appreciate. But creating our safe space has been the most amazing thing in the entire world. And we love staying at home. So if I can podcast from home, even better. And so now that I've let you guys in on my whole engagement, now I can take a few steps back and kind of walk through the whole fertility process and egg retrieval, all of that, because to the public, I stated that I was going to freeze my eggs. And it wasn't necessarily a lie. I had just not been public about my relationship yet. So there were some things that I just needed to keep safe to me and also Jason, right? Because he is not someone who is in the public eye. This is not his life. This is my life, like podcasting and in front of the world and all of these things. But when we were going through that process, I was actually creating embryos, which was why it was really hard for me to talk about things at times, because I couldn't be 110% transparent about it. But we ended up with two healthy embryos. And I went into the whole process and was like, you know what, if I just get one, I'll be happy. Because in my mind, expect the worst. And then when it gets there, it's really not that bad. It's how I've coped with things most of my life. And so that was a really tough journey for me. But Jason was such a rock star during that journey. And I fell even more in love with him during that. Like, I feel like you can during that? Like, I feel like you could I feel like you never stop falling in love with the person that you're with and different phases of life can bring those things out of you. Going through this whole IVF process, Jay went with me just even in the mornings just to get blood drawn. All I had to do was go in, get my blood drawn, and leave. He's like, no, you're not going by yourself. Never missed a single doctor's appointment. He was there. He was present. He was part of it. He was so empathetic. Whatever he could do, he did. We went through that process. It was really challenging because there are so many people around me getting pregnant and having babies. I have endometriosis and adenosis, I think is how you say it. I've had multiple surgeries for it. I've had some doctors tell me it's going to be really hard for you to get pregnant. In my heart and mind, I know that God meant for me to be a mom. If I don't do anything right in my life, that will be the one thing that I know I excel at because that's just where my heart's at. It's been really hard to be in this season of life of being super happy for people who are getting pregnant when you yourself know that could potentially not happen for you. Then to go through the whole IVF process and egg retrieval to embryos and scrolling through TikTok and social media and seeing that people are getting 10 embryos after one retrieval and all these crazy numbers. Then you come back and you're like, oh, I have two. The doctor's like, you really need two to three embryos for every child you want to have. I'm like, oh, so I'm going to have to go through this one, two more times, maybe. It was a lot mentally and emotionally just to feel like for some reason your body's not keeping up or it's not producing the way that you need it to produce. And it felt like my body was failing me. Like, what am I not doing right? When in reality, it had nothing to do with what I was doing and what I wasn't doing. It was just the cards that were dealt to me. And it was a struggle. But what made it so much easier was number one, the partner that I have and Jason, that he made it a walk in the park being who he is. And then obviously, my best friends, Pamela and Michaela coming over to my house, giving me my shots because Michaela is in the medical field. So as my friend, she's like, I want to show up for you however I can. So it's people like that that show up for you in your life. And it's made me realize you can be in the midst of a really difficult season. But when you have people who show up for you, it makes it all so worth it. And it makes it all so much easier. Now, in the end, we got two embryos. And it we really got three. But one of them didn't make it past the different stages of things. And that was really sad and heartbreaking because to me, that's a baby. But in the end, we ended up with two embryos. And those embryos are girls, which we are so excited. And thrilled and ecstatic over just, I mean, imagine two more of me. Like everyone in my life is like, that's scary. I think it's great. I mean, that's just more Hermes and all the amazing things. I was in Louis Vuitton yesterday. Oh my gosh, they have these little bitty purses. Game over. Anyways, girls are going to be so much fun. But they're also going to give me a really hard time because I was. I like to think I was a walk in the park. I was for most of my life. And then my dad's just came in. He's looking at me like I'm crazy. I was a walk in the park for most of my life. I was a walk in the park for most of my life until I kind of went. Until I wasn't. Yes. But I am super excited for those two little embryos. And the one that did not make it was a little boy, which when I found that out, I definitely crashed. But it was a little boy. I was a little boy. I was a little boy. I was a little boy. I was a little boy. I was a little boy. I was a little boy. I had my moment. Looks like I said to me, it's a baby and it was just heartbreaking. But I knew that God had a plan for everything that was happening in life. And I just had to make peace with it. And everyone in my life helped me do that. Whether it was mom, dad, Jason, friends, they really helped me. Lone Star Casino, you're right where you belong. LoneStarCasino.com. Welcome to Lone Star Casino, a free to play, winner's paradise. Packed with pure excitement and all the Vegas thrills right at your fingertips. LoneStarCasino.com. And I think what helped me a lot was making peace with the fact that it may happen, but it may be hard, right? Like anything that you do in life, it may happen, but it's going to be hard. And you have to make peace with that. When mom and dad were gone, I kind of had to come to that realization. You guys know that I've said, they may not be here when I have my first child. They may not be here when I get married. And I had to make peace with that because I knew I couldn't be delusional about what could happen. And it's been the same with this fertility process, like make peace with the hard. And that's been a really, really good learning lesson for me. Now for Jason and I, our wedding was scheduled for January 9th of 2027. And let me tell you, it was going to be a phenomenal time. It still is going to be a phenomenal time. It has just been pushed a few months to May of 2027. And that is because we got the surprise of a lifetime while we were aboard the Four Seasons yacht. We went on this cruise and we were, we started in Istanbul. We were going along the coast of Turkey into Greece and I felt horrible. Okay. I felt nauseous. I'm like, oh God, this is a terrible idea. I'm seasick. They gave me like really expensive champagne. It tasted like peanuts to me. Said no one ever as Jason likes to say. And I was having really bad cramps. I'm like, oh God, here we go. Like was that time of the month. And I didn't think anything of it. And then I looked down at my phone and I'm like, wait, I'm like five days late on my period. And this was like a month after the egg retrieval. So we find a Turkish pharmacy and go check Turkey, which the post that I posted that said something about go check and the amazing memories that have been made there. That's what that was referring to. So we found this pharmacy and we went in, Jason asked for a test. We got it. I forgot to take it that night. Woke up the next morning. Cause that's how like non-pregnant I thought I was right. Like I just did this egg retrieval. There was no way I was cramping really bad, whatever. Well, I'm here to tell you that that test came back within like 10 seconds, two bright pink lines. And I was like, stop it. No, there was no way. And that's how we found out that we are officially pregnant. So it was a major plot twist. I mean, we both were so God's hand was written all over this. I thought there is no way. And for us, that's like the happiest time of our entire life. So joyful. I have so many videos on our phone that we did during the whole egg retrieval process and embryos. And even on the boat, the first day we got on the boat, we did a video to our future babies because we're like, look, we just got you a month ago. We had our embryos. Yeah, I have the video. It's wild. And we're talking to our babies and we're like, look, mom and dad are here and we show it all. Little did I know I had a baby in my stomach at the time when we're filming this video. And to me, it's just such a God thing. Just when you think it can't happen or just when you kind of lose hope, God shows up. And I've said that time and time again. Look at what happened with mom and dad. Look now what has happened with this sweet little miracle baby that I now have in my stomach, which is absolutely insane. And we actually, Jason, I actually have a little statue of the boat that we were on sitting in our entryway because we're like, we have to have something to remember this to like show our little baby when they get old enough. Like, look, that's where mommy and daddy were when they found out about you. And the amount of peace and gratitude and excitement we have is absolutely insane. I, we both are so excited. there's not a bone in my body that is scared. Well, I take that back. I am scared for the actual physical process, if you know what I mean. Head, shoulders. After that, I feel like it'll be easy, but the shoulder part's really getting me. You know, that I'm not looking forward to. But being a parent and getting to care for this sweet, innocent, beautiful child is the most amazing thing in the entire world. And I am so unbelievably excited for it. I know Jason is. Jason's like, I can't wait to have my best little friend. And we're just grateful because children are the greatest blessings in the entire world. You guys know that I have said that time and time again. And there is no child that I can't wait to have. And I know that I can't wait to have my again. And there is no child that should not be loved or cared for. Or I went, I just being in the situation that my family has been in and seeing the prison system and all of these children that just kind of get left behind at times, it made that feeling in my heart so much stronger of like, every child deserves that love. Every child from the moment you are conceived, you are a child, you are a child of God, you deserve that love and safety and care. And I cannot wait to give that to a baby. So we are unbelievably excited and cannot wait for this baby to get here. I am almost 21 weeks, which is absolutely insane. Like, can't even put it into words how crazy it feels. So we hope this sweet little baby makes their appearance on mom's birthday. That's mom's biggest blessing and dream in the entire world. And when it comes to the gender of the baby, I do know, okay, I did not do some crazy gender reveal. I think my whole life has been such a production that I couldn't wait, couldn't do it. So we got that email and boom, we knew what it was. And I think our plan is going to be to release that gender on socials shortly after this podcast comes out. So we have a fun little way, cute little photos to show you guys what it is. And I cannot wait for you to figure it out, but maybe we'll get some guesses boy or girl, what do you think it is? But when it comes to my life and where I'm at, it's, this is the happiest I've ever been in my entire life. I am so fulfilled and happy and grateful. And God is so good and has been so good to me even through the really hard times in life. And before I go, I do want to talk to some of you who are listening to this today. I know that it's not easy, right? Like I have sat here on this podcast and explained to you how hard it was for me to be happy for people at times when they announce their pregnancies or their engagements, because that's where you want to be. It's so hard watching other people live out the dream that you so badly wish for yourself. And if that's you, I see you. I hear you. I understand you. That is totally OK. All I would say is kind of remember what my dad told me, right? Being envious of someone else's blessing isn't going to make yours come any faster. So I know for me, that helped me in my journey to getting to where I'm at today. And if it's you, your time is coming. Sometimes you have to have understanding and realize it's just going to be hard. And hard doesn't always mean bad. Sometimes we learn the biggest lessons in the midst of the hardest seasons of our life. And I can say that has been true for myself. And your time's coming. You will find your person and God will never leave you nor forsake you. So your time is coming. I promise you, my time's here. Your time is next. 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