Hawaii w/ Duncan Trussell | You Be Trippin' with Ari Shaffir

hey everybody today's episode of you be tripping is brought to you by cigars international do you like a good cigar on a nice day or even if you have an overhang on a cloudy day or a rainy day that's my dream actually to get an awning that i can like pull forward that can smoke cigars on a warm day while it's raining i did one of those in they send you handmade cigars uh from all over cohibas i got a five pack cohibas in them it was really really good um it offers a larger selection unbeatable prices and customer service experience second to none so if you're new to cigars or if you're like know what you're talking about either way they got you so one of my favorites was in ecuador in the amazon i'm staying at this like hotel first week probably in ecuador pouring rain and there was this little like balcony and i could just watch this rain smoking a really legitimately shitty cigar really shitty cigar that i think i got in quito it's an ecuadorian brand called uh la libertador no there was another one about the fighter i think it was the same company the point is love a good cigar plus bring a bunch to a barbecue anything um man anyway get yours the cigars international um use my code trippin at checkout for 20% off your order of 50 or more or visit www.cigarsinternational.com slash trippin and the discount will automatically apply some exclusions apply um that's it let's get back to the let's get back to the episode hey guys it's ari shafir before i start today's episode with duncan trussell i want to tell you about my new storytelling stand-up show called the end it is the end of what you might know as ari's renamed storytelling show before that it was called this is not happening before that it was called ari storytelling show i brought it back and it's available right now at ari shafir.com you can get a single one hour long episode for five dollars 99 cents or if you buy five you can get two for free um this is when i told duncan what i was trying to do he said oh nice the new show is coming up it's going to be a new show it's going to be a new show it's going to be a new show he called it the new model the new model is this if you don't know it is direct to consumers which doesn't mean anything other than we the performer the creator are bringing it straight to you this isn't some i get it there's a ton of youtube specials out there and there's a ton of netflix specials out there but this is higher level and i'm not in the industry that way and honestly i had that show on a network before and they betrayed me and they stole it so i couldn't do that so the deal is i'm going to bring you the highest quality show on the internet and i'm going to bring you the highest level stand-up you've ever seen it's shot so beautifully the sound is crisp and clear i spent kind of all my money on it and what i couldn't afford tom segura came in and gave me the rest on a loan i give it back but once he's recouped he's fine he's out we're also paying the comedians for the first time any stand-up show they are part of the profits so if you buy it i would say buy the entire season you're supporting not just me and my endeavor to make great creative high high level stand-up comedy you're also supporting the comics you're putting money in duncan trussell's pocket if you buy the show and it's not just a donation you're getting something amazing for it and i know it's tough not everybody can afford you know 30 bucks for anything it's not for you but for those people who have money for entertainment this is less than the price of any stand-up show for any comic you'll see on the lineup it's honestly the price of a movie right now is 25 bucks for any new movie on you know anything that you pay for and this is that and you're getting four movies worth of time with comedians like nate bargazzi duncan trussell shane gillis tony hinchcliffe tom segura joe list robert kelly sam talent roy wood jr the greats of my old storytelling show miss pat ali sadiq big j okerson and many many more it doesn't stop it's one hour of high level stand-up comedy at the end of my storytelling show called the end plus everybody gets the prologue for free unless you buy episode two only and that is a clean episode and you can't see the prologue um that's it you can get it at rechef.com and please guys if you've ever wanted to support me in my endeavor to be an outsider and make crazy shit then this is the time put a little in and then enjoy it watch with your friends it's great and the response has been out of this world so far and i love every one of you everybody who said they saw and loved it god damn it makes me feel good so that's it let's go to hawaii guys rechef.com support me and my craziness let's start the episode excellent i mean clearly that was better yeah it was it was just as good as the first one it was significant so we can tell the first one was bad because of the man you got to treat the people who work with you better this is a community work will set them free duncan what work will set them free where you guys work will set you free where have i heard that before what my that's my wife has that tattoo you don't you there's a fucking rebellion here they're trying to take over are they really yeah i support the workers do you hear the word supplant yeah they're trying to supplant christina well look man the i've heard about how they get treated around here so yeah they took christina's car and they drove them she drove like through a bunch of red light really yeah through reds over and over and over again got her like six thousand dollars in tickets then put it back where you've been and where you're going welcome to you be tripping everybody it's a travel podcast um you've seen it before i go to a different place every week with somebody who's been there it's the only uh podcast that believes that uh r&b has no place in the rock and roll hall of fame keep them separate but equal um make your own country clubs so to speak and that's what you'd be tripping stands for it's not rock and roll it's something else there should be a hip-hop hall of fame also dolly parton your country she shouldn't be in there country clubs are dumb aren't they dumb what do you mean like a place to go to play golf and play tennis separately from everybody country clubs airport lounges oases of dipshits like you know what i mean and it's not that it's not that it's and i don't know if oasis is the plural of oasis but i like dipshit but you when when we were living in asheville yeah you joined one we we were in a neighborhood right by a golf course and they had a pool and it was cheap this is asheville so this is not like the country club here you got to put down like half a million dollars it's crazy but it didn't matter that this is a a cheap country club like this is just a shitty pool the food kind of sucked it didn't matter but the clustering of people because they were at a country club had an air about them of being oh you shouldn't be proud they were proud proud to be separate and we were newcomers to this place yeah i didn't even play fucking golf and you know just the looks you would get of kind of like do you belong here that's what i feel whenever i'm when rogan flies me first class i see people looking at me like you're not you shouldn't be up here that's all they're doing is thinking you're like that nobody feels like they belong in first class and if a couple people do like people do i was standing in line tom tom feels like he's getting something bad happened to him when he's in first class somebody yeah that's where it gets really funny people get in first class they think it's coach yeah first class is a nightmare i was in line at the airport in this uh you know they announced the medallions or whatever and there's one medallion you hear about they but no one ever comes up purple heart it's like a purple heart it's that level i know they i was out of my meal choice once so you get a purple heart they did a silent a moment of gratitude a silent moment of gratitude for like the triple ivories or whatever and this dude was one of these triple ivories or whatever i don't remember what it's called a sterling ruby and i said whoa you're a sterling ruby is that really hard to get and he goes yeah what a fucking chad what a fucking chud like that i was even asking what a fucking dork yeah where are we going today what do we want to talk about look man um you've been to one place in the world ever i've been to a bunch of places but not nothing that exciting happened to me i've been to some places i thought we could talk about the time i went to eastern europe with some friends and some of them got kidnapped by these sex traffickers and tortured and uh uh you know like we were staying at a hostel and they all got fucked up by these rich people oh but um i thought we could talk about hawaii okay that's cooler it's so great it's like the wrong choice it's like but you know whatever uh it's nothing you know pretty basic so let's hawaii you want to talk about why yeah yeah i mean i don't know if that really counts i think because it's not really supposed to be america no that's true it's like here yeah it definitely is funny that that you're there like oh this is america and there are people who don't know that it's america there was some some somebody like some aggrieved leftist made some post about how they were going to leave the country to hawaii and because of colonialism and the problems of america on every level it's the craziest country to go to to protest america that's funny but she didn't know it was america oh really no she thought she was going to another country she didn't know hawaii was america so she was like making a big deal about leaving the country which is on par with my other favorite leaving thing which is when people leave twitter it is my favorite those tweets are the funniest fucking tweets can you call some of those up it's so funny to make the big announcement guys i'm out of here i need everyone to know that i'm better than you in some way i can't tolerate it here i can't tolerate it and i'm gonna take to this place to let you know that this place is negative i mean it's the same kind of announcement like if something happened maybe i had a nervous breakdown and i realized i think i'm gonna become a monk it's the kind of announcement i would give my family like guys i'm gonna leave now i'm going to a monastery you won't see me for 20 years i know i'm your father but a greater calling there's a greater calling you're saying that guy should just this just irish goodbye the family i'm saying if you're leaving fucking twitter just go don't act like anyone gives a shit the the the posts act like there's gonna be a day of mourning they act like elon like someone's gonna immediately a phone will ring on musk's desk and he's like what oh god oh god no no you wanna hear something funny yeah elon musk my friend works at the forest department forestry service forestry service they get emails from him all the time what have you done to help further america today what have you done to protect your job and then there's all this stuff where any biodiversity mention of biodiversity comes up with a flag of diversity and it gets bounced back oh my god because they're so strong against diversity it's like they're like we can't have that like so they have to rephrase all their stuff you know what's crazy about like one of the one of the things i i have several things that i have a great deal of respect for elon musk he's like one of the top rated diablo players he's a gamer good sound systems in those teslas and he's he is on ketamine and lets everybody know cool good dancer so good day great dancer god he's so smooth but you know having been addicted to ketamine for several years uh i recognize a lot of like for example one of the rules if you decide to get addicted to ketamine that you have to establish for yourself is you must not tweet because on ketamine yeah it's something about it i talked to hamilton morris about this there is a bizarre kind of egomania that happens with ketamine where you know it's sort of like coke just ketamine well it's kind of like you know they say opposite stand back to back i think they're overlappers well they both are white powders they're both great at a bar for a little toots toots they're both great at a bar but with with cocaine yeah you could keep doing rails or key bumps of cocaine and you're gonna get like you you know it wakes you up it's a little reset with ketamine yeah you go over the one one bump too many and you're you're gone like you're gonna you're going to go into a completely alternate dimension you're gonna merge with reality and you don't want that to happen so you're always as a ketamine user you become familiar with what it feels like when you're about to go into the k-hole okay and you learn how to sort of get to the bleeding edge of that space and sort of enjoy that place or how to throw yourself over but it's interesting contextually to look at everything he does from the lens of that dude is blasted on ketamine that's interesting wants to go to mars you know what i mean these are things these are things on ketamine yeah these are things are like yeah his child a bunch of symbols dude but on ketamine you're like it sounds right it makes sense like you're like from your perspective yeah all of these things and so from an artistic perspective i think it's a real a great uh creativity enhancer yeah but from a trying to do anything mechanical technical send a text send a tweet anything that involves any kind of just like basic i don't know which side of the brain is in charge of math but that side of the brain takes a vacation when you're on ketamine yes so it's curious to watch what he's doing because and it's also i love that he's just saying yeah i'm on ketamine all the fucking time and then a biodiversity something getting flagged for biodiversity yeah from that perspective makes sense yeah and i think it's a really good point it makes sense he and you know and i i'm guessing like that if he's on ketamine you gotta wonder what so if i'm sitting can you guys get us some ketamine by the way no you bring in some i don't do it anymore i don't i for real i just i know i know that look i swear i stopped i i stopped when um about it the last time i did it was um when i was in san francisco and uh it was the coolest thing happened ever which is i'm just like i i stayed an extra day uh just to walk around san francisco was the night before my extra day and i don't know how it happened but these like british this old these like older british dudes are like you like drum and bass i swear to god you like drum and bass music and i'm like yeah and they're like you come with us and i'm like yeah and they're like you come with us and i'm like yeah and they're like and like i got in the car with them i know you shouldn't do that they took me to an underground drum and bass rave it was insane like real fucking drum and just like you're just like vibrating then i got in a i was i got in a conversation um what with this like just strikingly beautiful gay dude and like we're just talking and he's like you want some ketamine i'm like yeah and so then that was the last time i did it and it was of course incredible why because it was perfect and you couldn't top it what because you couldn't top the experience it was no no just because um you know what sounds great dude when you have kids yeah you can't be on fucking ketamine well i can do blasting rails of ketamine in my in my wait when was this san francisco thing this was i wasn't around any kids i was on the road oh you're a volunteer fireman you don't want you don't want your fireman on ketamine you don't when you have kids anything can happen yeah don't do it around the kids dude well i'm always around kids oh i just and also just wouldn't feel right just to just but you're doing any kind of rails anything when you got kids and you feel like no you gotta but you gotta like don't give them rails of ketamine but give them something that is like you know baby powder or something you'd be a great dad yeah yeah it's good dad advice like you want to give your kids baby powder to snort while you do ketamine yeah so they feel like they're belonging or they're come on in guys your daddy's about to disassociate why don't you snort some carcinogenic baby powder guys where's that ketamine already let's do rails of coke and ketamine and just guess pick a pick a line i could tell me pick a line just looking at it or as soon as it's in your nose uh probably if i had to bet i think looking at it but i don't know about that for sure i dated a chick here once and you could put a pill in her hand from behind her back she'd tell you what it was and how much the dosage was wow that is so cool and it's so interesting how people like that are just right next door to being like incredible pharmacists like that that's an amazing like you a lot of these depraved life activities it's almost like your karma was to be a pharmacist yeah it's like a choose an adventure book like do you want to be a junkie or a pharmacist and you can you do one of the oh actually i'm pretty sure a lot of pharmacists are junkies how could you not take a pill in your nose make a little extra your own little let's talk about travel today oh yeah why did you go when so you went to hawaii for what for that those conferences i know well yes like um so you went before i did you were going always yeah i i i don't remember the first year that i went to these things it was it was the right after my mom died okay and i'd already like sorry again about that it's not enough to say you're sorry it's my mom it's all you're gonna say yeah you're sorry so what does that do for me my actions bring my mom back you're right what are you doing shuffling come on come on oh twenty dollars yeah so that's what my mom was worth to you at this point it's been years so you're saying she depreciated in value yeah yeah yeah right there would have been hundreds tariffs are fucked up thank you you're welcome um apology accepted hi guys arty shafir here breaking into today's episode to let you know a little bit about the guest duncan truzzle first and foremost he's on a new stand-up storytelling show called the end his story is out of this world he's uh tells a story about taking his children to a taylor swift um concert film and it's it's nuts uh he's an episode called uh not all heroes right he's an episode called uh not all heroes right he's an episode called uh not all heroes wear capes, where I am also in it, and Mark Norman is a headliner of that episode. Um, it's great. It's a great one. It's actually my favorite story that I've done on this, on the show this season. I did three, two real ones and then an Easter egg. They're all real, but an Easter egg one that you'll find. Um, well, if you don't know, I don't want to ruin the surprise, but there's another one. Um, please get it right now at rashafir.com. You can get, uh, this episode of Duncan's on for $5 and 99 cents. That's really nothing for an hour of standup comedy. Highest level standup comedy there is. There's also an Easter egg in this episode. Uh, please leave in the comments. If you'd like that Easter egg, if you've seen it, leave in the comments about it. Um, Duncan is the most creative man I've ever met in Hollywood. He's the most creative man. Uh, no one's, no one really comes close. It's not really a, it's not really a, even a discussion. It's Duncan. And I was like, I, I think I found his number. I was often like, I don't think it was, or I think it might've been Chile. Or Argentina. And I said, Duncan, would you be willing to do this thing that you're going to see? And he goes, Oh yeah, that sounds awesome. Can't really do that when a network gets involved. They go, no, no, I'll make it standard. Me and Tony Hinchcliffe were talking about this, how he, at the end of every one of his specials. Now he's thanks everyone. And he puts in a very specific except Ari Shafir, not Ari Shafir. Networks won't let you do stuff like that. He's got to have the power and I do too. And the reason I have the power is because you guys have supported it. And I thank you all for watching. Everyone who's watched it so far. God, you've made me so happy. The ones who have left comments. I know some of you are surprised. You're like, Oh, I didn't realize this was like a better show than anything that's ever been put on Netflix. Yeah. This is some Kevin Hart dumb fuck thing where he's like, let's just get some money. No, no. This is me realizing my dream. If you want to be part of that dream, go to AriShafir.com right now. And a minimum by the Duncan Charles episode and a maximum get seven for the price of five. That's buy five, get two free. It's almost 20%. Off. Is that right? Yeah. That's a bonus of 20%. Two extra ones. I have a five, 40%. Buy five, get two for. Yeah, it's 40% more. I, my math might be wrong. So support it. Let's do what Duncan Trussell calls the new model. And let's make comedy without any sort of rules and regulations that networks will give you. It's real. Duncan's on the road. You can find all his tour dates at Duncan Trussell.com. May 1st, we'll be at Philadelphia. At Helium Comedy Club. Then Cleveland, Ohio. Hilarities. These are both great clubs he's performing at. Then May 15th, La Jolla Comedy Store. Oh, three for three for Duncan that weekend. And then in June, Charlotte, North Carolina. Asheville, North Carolina. The Orange Peel. Get it, Duncan. Get a pen there. It says I stole this from the green. Then the Wilbur in Boston. Austin, Texas. And the Mothership. He's headlining a weekend. Probably already sold out. Albuquerque, New Mexico. Fort Worth, Texas. Detroit, Michigan. And Brooklyn, New York at the Bell House, November 18th. Go to DuncanTrussell.com for that. You can also listen to his podcast or watch his podcast called the Duncan Trussell Family Hour. I have been on at least two times. And I'll be on in like a couple of weeks. So subscribe to that podcast and subscribe to my podcast, You Be Trippin'. It's the only funny travel podcast there is. No, actually, Montandana is a funny one. And actually, Small Brain American is a funny one, too. All right. Well, for the comedians, it's the only one. I'm also on Legion of Skinks every Monday. Check that out. LegionofSkinks.com. And that's it. Let's get back to the Hawaii for this episode. He's so interesting, Duncan. Hi, everybody. One break-in announcement really quickly to tell you. Ari Shafir Jew is on Netflix starting today. That's right. I know. It seems weird. We're like, wasn't it on YouTube? Well, it was. And Netflix has decided to make Jew the very first special they've ever picked up off YouTube. It's quite an honor. Yeah. It's a mazalto for all of us. So go to Netflix right now and watch Jew again or for the first time. When your parents die. Yeah. And you know, it's since you're a kid, you know, when you start finding out your parents are going to die and it's like you start getting this sense of there seems to be some kind of scam happening. Because nobody told me this shit. Like for you, you're born with some general sense of immortality. And then depending on the parents you have in the West, they kind of slowly break it to you. Like, yeah, you don't stay here forever. And then you connect the dots. You're like, but you'll be here forever. No, I'm not going to be here forever. You're going to watch me die if things go great. Yeah. All right. It's good. Or you're going to bear me or I'm going to bury you, kiddo. And so, you know, you you you have to deal with that over a lifetime. And you when you're when you go through periods with your parents where you generally don't want to talk to them and they're like, why didn't you call me? And then but inevitably your parents die and nothing prepares you for that moment. Nothing can prepare you for becoming an orphan later on in life. But it's it's like so you you nothing can prepare you for that. It's the first experience. Well, it's the first one for a lot of people is the first. It's a major experience of the reality of existence. And in other words, a lot of people walk around this amazing bubble. Yeah. And in that bubble, they haven't really considered the precarious nature of their own existence. And so they walk around acting like assholes because they don't understand that. And any second you just keel over like that just happens. Your heart fucks up, your brain fucks up or your dearest friends keel over and you get a call. So when you get this two major confirmations when your parents die, generally your mother's the more intense one, I think. You know, when people are dying, they call out for their moms. They don't call out for their dads. So anyway, isn't that fucked up? Isn't that fucked up? But it would be weird if somebody was like, "Dad! Dad!" Like, "Gay, gay, what?" "Just die, pussy!" But so it hit me really hard. Okay. And Raghu Marcus, who runs Ram Dass Foundation, it was so cool because I'm just laying in bed, just so depressed, man. And like, just fucked up. And, you know, he texted me-- In LA? In LA, in Atwater Village, laying in bed, just in this miasma, just like, ugh. And not even like, grief is so weird. Like, it's the weirdest thing. It's basically, you've made all these neural, my theory is you've made all these neurological connections that connect to mom existing. And then there's this vacuum. And so they're connected to, like, this It's essentially, like-- Nothing to bind to. Nothing. And so it throws you. Grief is crazy. And anyway, he texted me, and he's like, "Just come to this retreat. Don't think about it." That's what he said. He's like, "Just don't even think about it. Just go buy a plane ticket and just come to this thing." And I remember getting up, all bleary and depressed. You know what it's like to be depressed, dude, when you're just like, literally, like, walking through, like, it's like someone pouring-- Yeah, like, poured oil over everything. Things just are just sluggish and slow and foggy. So I get the plane ticket, and yeah, and then I get on a plane and fly to Hawaii to go to a spiritual retreat. And dude, like, you know, in those days, I was really dreading it, because I had no idea what this was going to be like. I'm like, I don't want to be around a bunch of fucking hippies. Yeah. I don't really feel like doing this. I'm not quite sure I buy it all the way. I was hyper. Yeah, what do you think you're walking into? What's a spiritual retreat? At that point, what do you think it's going to be? A bunch of people fucking dancing with elephant pants? Yes. To drum and bass? Abs-- well, not drum and bass. Or to, like, whatever that jungle music is? No, kirtan. Singing Hare Krishna. Basically, like, so I'd already met Raghu. He'd done my podcast. So I already, like, knew he was cool. He was not like-- Is he the one that you're like, "I have mushrooms for you," and he goes, "Oh, cool," and just took a bunch? No. Who was that? There was somebody who was like, "I gave you, like, a week's worth, like, a bunch of, like--" And he was like, "Awesome." And you're like, "What are you doing?" And he goes, "Just go." Oh, I can't say who that was. Okay. I don't know if I have permission to say that, but-- Okay. But you remember that? A wonderful-- I remember you going like, "Whoa, whoa!" A very, very talented musician. I love his music. But-- and it-- because I remember, like, doing the whole speech, because I had these penis envy mushrooms that are the most insane things ever. They're the best. And I was-- I'd already had an insane trip on them. Yeah. And I told them, like, "Listen, this is not normal mushrooms. They're penis envy mushrooms. These blah, blah." And I think, as I'm describing why, to be careful, he's like, "Okay, yeah, just eats so many of them." And it was fine. It was fine. We were in Bonnaroo, and I got mushrooms for everybody. Oh, that's so nice. For all of comedy. Yeah. I've done it for a couple festivals. And everyone's like, "So how much should I take?" You know, you've been the shaman-- Yeah. --for a bunch. And then you're like-- they're like, "Well, I don't want to get crazy. I don't want to, like, be lying." I don't want to, like, be lying on the grass without, like, "Okay, let me take a few off your hand." Yeah. Someone else is like, "I want to get very fucked up." And I'm trying to, like-- Yeah. if they're like why don't i get too i'm pulling something back from each person yeah and then christine okerson is just like you know you were eating everything you pulled back well some people really uh work well with mushrooms and some don't like mushrooms are really interesting in that way because they have their own personality yeah they will they will like if if you need a life lesson they don't care that you're a bonner like they they will give you the teaching no matter where you're at and i don't think people understand that it does what it wants it does what sometimes you're like but i barely even took any it's like it's not i i do didn't need to take any actually but like yeah that that that's a fascinating thing about them too is it seems regardless of dosage sometimes sometimes you're like i took a ton i'm barely feeling it yeah and the mushroom is just like no not today yeah no we're not doing a class today but then you take like a cap and they're like you know what i think it's time for me to teach you about emptiness and the interconnected web of nature and yeah and then you're just free but okay so you show up there or you're going yeah so i so i show up there basically not knowing what to expect but having like a um a real sense of dread about what i had done and and um what do you mean what you had done signed up to go to a retreat and uh because it's like i don't know i don't i don't want to do you know like there's so many embarrassing things people do at retreats like embarrassing things like um what's it called that awful kind of improv dancing people do together i don't know what it's gonna be do you know i'm talking about no so bad it's so bad look up there's some kind of improv there's just awful shit or like yoga where they lift you up on your back and they go down somebody's feet acro yoga yeah all that shit you know all the stuff that loosened up people do and you're like oh my god i don't know what to do i don't know what to do i don't know what to do and you and it's a nightmare for me so i didn't know if it was going to be like that and um i you know i but i remember i had a day before the retreat and uh i'm sitting in a hot tub at this place i think it burnt down called the banyan tree inn um and there are these two women there this is in maui there are these two women in the hot tub and these women are into vajrayana buddhism shaved heads they're going to the retreat and we start talking and one of them says about their partner yeah she's going to become a monk and it was the weirdest thing for me to hear because this is the first time i'd really been around people who are seriously seriously engaging with a lot of this stuff right this part this one they were going to abandon their relationship and become a monk for the um a nun for the rest of their life and so uh it was really wild i remember that moment and then uh i remember the first day they're going to become a monk yes and how was how was the other those how was the partner she was they're both buddhists so they're both they're not like faking being happy so they're just very honest and the partner says i don't want her to do it but there's nothing i can do this is her calling and lesbos yeah that's what they call it and they're both buddhists and they're all out there that's the hawaiian word for lesbian lesbos yeah i learned that from lilo and stitch but the dylan free waters by burke kreischer soft plush and round just like burke and also strapping straps like he's trapping and brown brown yeah brown brown like blackface get him i don't know where to get him but get him they're good the birds get him the next day of the retreat um there's ramdas and he's in his wheelchair and you know ramdas is the leader of this crew ramdas is the you know ramdas is kind of only for you really ramdas wrote so ramdas was a harvard and we could do a whole podcast talking about the history of who this person is because he's fascinating but basically his name was richard alpert he was pals with tim leary they were both professors at harvard and they this is both this is before lsd had become illegal um and psychedelics were illegal and so they were uh psychologists and they were really interested in these drugs because uh they they felt like these drugs what like kind of like where we're at right now is um is where they they realized we could be like now we're where there was a sort of dark period when because of the prohibition but these albert and leary both realized that these psychedelics seem to have a positive impact on uh the human brain and but we call that neurogenesis now i don't even know if that's what they called it back then but they realized that there were so many potential uses for these psychedelics and so they started doing experiments with lsd most famously the good friday experiment where they gave was mushrooms they gave mushrooms and they gave them mushrooms and they gave them to a bunch of people i think i don't know what denomination the church it was a church on good friday which is pretty much the grimmest part of the christian holiday this is after the crucifixion of jesus they put a a blanket over the cross it's like they're mourning the crucifixion of christ and so they wanted to see if they could induce mystical experiences by giving psilocybin to people on a holy day did they tell the church yeah they told them okay and they're but they and they you know they did the placebo half of them got mushrooms half of them didn't they did the placebo half of them got mushrooms half of them didn't they did the placebo half of them got mushrooms half of them didn't they did the placebo half of them got mushrooms half of them didn't they did the placebo half of them got mushrooms half of them didn't they did the placebo half of them didn't and they talk about it didn't and they talk about it didn't and they talk about it was very easy to tell right away you got was very easy to tell right away you got was very easy to tell right away you got placebo and who didn't i think it was placebo and who didn't i think it was placebo and who didn't i think it was synthetic psilocybin which is what a lot synthetic psilocybin which is what a lot synthetic psilocybin which is what a lot of them are taking is synthetic of them are taking is synthetic of them are taking is synthetic psilocybin because you could measure it psilocybin because you could measure it psilocybin because you could measure it out do you know the new out do you know the new out do you know the new experiments you're doing with with l with experiments you're doing with with l with you feel if that's what they're you feel if that's what they're you feel if that's what they're inducing right incredible that's inducing right incredible that's inducing right incredible that's incredible it's convenient it's very incredible it's convenient it's very incredible it's convenient it's very western very modern very capitalist it's western very modern very capitalist it's western very modern very capitalist it's like now you can go to work and be like now you can go to work and be like now you can go to work and be productive and i was worried when they productive and i was worried when they productive and i was worried when they did this for weed with like cbd and thc did this for weed with like cbd and thc did this for weed with like cbd and thc but it's okay you can still find the th but it's okay you can still find the th i mean also not everybody needs to be i mean also not everybody needs to be i mean also not everybody needs to be on two or three hundred micrograms of on two or three hundred micrograms of on two or three hundred micrograms of acid there's packets out there yeah and acid there's packets out there yeah and acid there's packets out there yeah and that could really cure that could really cure that could really cure what okay okay but back to this so okay so okay okay but back to this so okay so okay okay but back to this so okay so that's ramdas that's he i i mean he so that's ramdas that's he i i mean he so that's ramdas that's he i i mean he so looks so different with a beard than looks so different with a beard than looks so different with a beard than when he was in college to summarize when he was in college to summarize when he was in college to summarize they get kicked out of harvard because they get kicked out of harvard because they get kicked out of harvard because they're taking psychedelics they're they're taking psychedelics they're they're taking psychedelics they're giving psychedelics to the students giving psychedelics to the students giving psychedelics to the students they're having they're having they're having the experience which is they're the experience which is they're the experience which is they're realizing realizing realizing that there's this role that that there's this role that that there's this role that they're playing in the world the role of they're playing in the world the role of they're playing in the world the role of the square the square the square harvard ivy league psychologist harvard ivy league psychologist role that's in in within that role of role that's in in within that role of role that's in in within that role of you know i'm this and this is this is me you know i'm this and this is this is me you know i'm this and this is this is me and everything outside of this isn't me and everything outside of this isn't me and everything outside of this isn't me it's a kind of trap and so it's not just it's a kind of trap and so it's not just it's a kind of trap and so it's not just that that that harvard is like get out of here and it's harvard is like get out of here and it's harvard is like get out of here and it's connected to andrew wheel by the way connected to andrew wheel by the way connected to andrew wheel by the way the vitamin dude with a big beard like the vitamin dude with a big beard like the vitamin dude with a big beard like it's a whole scandal but regardless it's a whole scandal but regardless it's a whole scandal but regardless they get kicked out of harvard and they get kicked out of harvard and they get kicked out of harvard and essentially essentially essentially ramdas uh ramdas uh ramdas uh goes to india and he goes to india goes to india and he goes to india goes to india and he goes to india because he wants to give because he wants to give because he wants to give acid acid acid to people who meditate he wants to give to people who meditate he wants to give to people who meditate he wants to give acid to people who've been practicing acid to people who've been practicing acid to people who meditate he wants to give acid to people who've been practicing various forms of various forms of various forms of meditation to see if they had a map or an meditation to see if they had a map or an meditation to see if they had a map or an understanding of what this spiritual understanding of what this spiritual understanding of what this spiritual space was the lsd space was the lsd space was the lsd created for people and so it's you know created for people and so it's you know created for people and so it's you know and and and so he so he so he went to india with lsd went to india with lsd went to india with lsd specially made for him specially made for him specially made for him by um by um by um oh god what's his name the guy who funded of the Grateful Dead. Oh God, I'm so sad. I can't remember his name. It's really annoying. Steely Dan wrote a song about him, Kid Charlemagne, but he was this famous acid chemist in San Francisco. He whipped up a special batch of LSD just for Ram Dass. And I met his wife at one of these retreats, by the way, she's awesome. And I asked her, why is LSD as good as it supposedly was back then? And she goes, because people aren't perfectionists anymore. She was awesome. so owsley yeah so owsley i know some people aren't perfectionists anymore they're just like good enough he was whipping up apparently the most insane acid they say that when i know someone who rode with him when he was going around giving it to people and he said people would come out of their houses and do a full prostration laying on their stomach bowing them like he was a saint because his acid was that good so he whips up this batch of insane lsd he's just hamilton morris well that's yeah it's a past life of hamilton it's like chemists who's like but it's about the fun yes wow well anyway uh alpert that's ramdas's name at the time uh ends up my short shorts weirdo you know it's true though you gotta i don't think there was it's like you didn't take enough acid to not wear those shorts i like the other picture cuts it off just at the top of it short yeah it's just that's a way better picture of him tucked in t-shirt man well look anyway so yeah sorry i'm glad you pointed that out though because i wouldn't have noticed yeah they gotta be suspicious but honestly if that guy was like do you want some acid i'd be like sure yeah jean renunciate out there named bhagavan das and uh renunciate yeah renunciate like this is someone who renounced everything everything so these people are all over india there's people who just are like at some point yeah i'm just gonna like not do any i'm not gonna do anything except walk around and pray i'm not gonna own anything i'm not gonna live anywhere it's like it's like you know sadhus is what they call them and they just wander through india and india is built for this to work like people will give them stuff but they're the idea is i'll eat what people give me i'll have what i have and then i'm just going to meditate and so ramdas starts going around with this guy through india no shoes walking through india shoeless now remember this is an ivy league professor he's suddenly following this dude who was from california around barefoot through india and he tells stories about how he tried to impress him telling these incredible stories about flying in an airplane he could ramdas know how to fly a plane flying a plane with tim leary and um bhagavan das would say to him just be here now that's the past let's don't worry about that anymore and just he said he would like he didn't seem to sleep he said that he would wake up and like they were camping out he'd wake up and bhagavan das would be meditating he wouldn't be sleeping like really interesting dude and so um but alpert was getting like sick of india and he was going to leave to go to japan to study zen they had some kind of range rover a really nice car that one of alpert's friends had let them borrow and this hippie he's been following around was like dude my passport's about to expire uh we gotta go talk to my guru and so that respect response is exactly alpert's response a hundred percent you go to the fucking embassy like what what are you talking about you need to talk to your guru what's he got a stamp a flat tire stamp your ship yeah so that's exactly how he felt and to make matters worse um bhagavan das wanted to take the range rover up into the mountains to his guru and alpert was now getting real like fuck this you're not gonna drive the fucking range rover but he did he went up there with this guy in the goddamn range rover they get up in the mountains this hippie gets out of the range rover and goes running up a hill this in india in india okay goes running up a hill to this old man sitting in a blanket up the hill surrounded by people and crying he's weeping running up to this dude up there and albert's like oh my god and the whole time he's thinking about the range rover he's thinking like they're gonna fucking take this shit from me are they bandits what is this bullshit and so then um bhagavan das after a while comes down and says to albert he wants to meet you and so albert's like all right here we go and he goes up the hill and there's neem crowley baba um there's what can you pull up a picture of him neem crowley baba i thought it was like a baguette stand how do you spell that come on it's obvious yeah neem crowley baba n-e-e-m-k-a-r-o-l-i you lost me in the second letter i only guess what it was n right and then that so there's this guy up there in a blanket and yeah there's this dude up there in the blanket and he goes up to him and the first thing he says to him is can i have your range rover what really and and so so um and what what's interesting about that what he did is when you meet a lot of these people they will go exactly to your most neurotic point and say it to your face but you haven't said it to anybody and it it's like it pops a bubble and because when he says can i have your range rover everyone laughs so hard around him because they're like he's not gonna drive a fucking range rover he doesn't need a range rover he's just fucking with him and so um hi everybody today's episode of hebrew champion is brought to you by cheers guys you ever drink with joe de rosa and you think what a pig yeah he's a pig and he makes you drink too hard he drinks you drink harder than you want you wake up feeling like ass that's his legacy joe de rosa has a lot of friends that feel like ass and now there's a fight there's a there's a new weapon in the fight against joe de rosa's piggish behavior and it's cheers if you drink cheers after you go to drink or right before you go to bed even before you drink you'll feel 50 better it's not a miracle cure they're not going to tell you it is that's how you can believe them when everybody says what are the odds you get back to your girlfriend zero well now i don't believe you if you said like three percent and maybe you should catch me on a good day right after i you know uh feeling back sure maybe but not like that cheers helps you feel 50 it'll knock off the extra drinks the joe de rosa drinks the shots he brings over yeah it's harder and harder their claim to fame is you'll feel 50 percent better or your money back yeah cheers is backed by doctors phds and over 1 000 verified clinicians this order of 50 million doses 49 000 of those are people with drink with joe de rosa head pig take cheers restore after you drink your last drink or before you go to bed wake up feeling at least 50 better or your money back for a limited time my listeners are getting 20 off their entire order by using code trippin at cheershealth.com that's t-r-i-p-p-i-n no g just head to cheershealth.com you just go trippin for 20 off after you purchase they're gonna ask you where you heard about them please support my show and tell them my show sent you and if they ask who's a pig tell them joe de rosa's a pig martin luther king john f kennedy malcolm x and now dog piss has the stage all hell dog piss guess what violent horrendous the show where i do i guess what i do best which is complaining way too much about shit that's not that important i think all of us are going to be jailed an army of drunken screaming santa clauses the devil stick guy was the doctor shut the fuck come along for this beautiful disgusting vile and horrendous journey my new ymh show subscribe smash that like button we're going to be doing this every other week this is vile and horrendous here you go i'm giving this to you but i am ari shaffir okay it's a fucking crazy night we're gonna have here shit's about to go down we're here to talk ball this is a love story media herpes gonorrhea aids i'm desperate i'll stab you with your motherfucking one of the worst things that could happen what's your favorite bible verse i'm like i don't know any i'm catholic did you just shit your pants it's not my shit if you're up there lady don't call me i'm the bad guy in the story i know that i'll be a better person tomorrow at least you're not a bad guy he's consistent finally something we can agree on discuss it in hard it's not the evening i planned but i'm having a blast now if you'll excuse me and so then he um basically uh in this i've heard this from many different uh people he uh i mean there's these things they're called cities and it's you most of the time when you hear someone saying this shit it's not true but in this case i believe it but basically he told albert exactly what he was doing like three nights before not what he was doing but what he was doing what he was thinking and because he had this moment when he was taking a piss and he was thinking about his mom uh who had died and uh her her spleen something's wrong with her spleen and he said to him two nights ago you're under the stars thinking about your mother now these are this is being translated and then in english he goes spleen and so albert he thinks it's the cia that's his first thought like is this some kind of fucking setup he's he this doesn't work for western psychology that someone could do that and so it basically he says he felt something in his heart rip like he felt this weird feeling he starts crying and then alpert becomes um associated with neem karli baba for the rest of his life he gets the name ramdas and so the love serve remember foundation is um sort of what foundation it's called love serve remember because yeah because um you know famously um well that was like he wouldn't let people write down what he said he didn't want any of that shit should have been called love serve don't forget so it could be lsd ah well he that's another famous story about it is like he uh he he he was like give me give me your acid neem karli baba did yeah and so he gives him lsd it again this is like no joke lsd this is lsd they probably make us in deep india deep india he's like give me your acid he said people were never done no hadn't reached india yet i mean albert was one of the ways it was reaching india this guy takes acid nothing happens albert goes back to the united states tell some of his academic friends what happened they're like dude this is an old indian swami trick he palmed the pills he didn't take it there's no way you're going to take that kind of lsd and not have any effect the next time he went back neem karli baba said to him the last time you were here what did you give me and he said uh you know lsd and he goes did i take it and he goes he goes i don't know and he goes give me more so he puts it in his hand these are tablets he chews it up in front of him very slowly and now i know people who were there when this happened who saw it happen who saw like opens his mouth sticks his tongue out coated in blue and albert because he was pretty sure he's palming it gave him way more than he gave him last time and so albert is like i just killed an old man like i just killed an old man i just killed this sweet old man out in the more lsd than i've ever seen him when he eat like i am fucked because it's like he's thinking like as most of us would think right like it would be it would be like if you're if your kids got into something like you're like oh my god and so he some a little time passes and he goes under his blanket and he starts shaking he starts shaking raving shaking albert and i know people who saw this they said ram das's face the look of horror on his face no idea what to do and then he comes out of the blanket and just laughs and then the rest of the day totally normal what yeah dude yeah what how do you not react to acid well because people like that they um you know if you think about what lsd does it's melting your identity you know so people like that they they're they're they don't quite have the same kind of identity anymore they're kind of one of the words for people like that is a corpse the universe speaks through so i'm sure he was some part of was high as a fucking kite but they've they don't identify with that as completely them anymore the guy who took me for ayahuasca who took me to whatever the village he was like i've done a bunch whatever but he took his kid once his kid was like 17 or 19 and he said his kid nothing really happened to him he goes he had nothing to work out wow so he's like man like a feeling a little there you go yeah how about the people are crying of like yeah there you go and i've seen there are people like that and that that was one of them so anyway i talk too much about his story i know i do that but this retreat so then ram das becomes ram das there so ram das becomes ram das ram das goes from ivy league professor to the one of the one of the like uh main like i guess you could say translators of eastern spirituality into a western what are his parents vernacular this they didn't like it i'm sure not his dad called him rumdum that's pretty brutal that's pretty brutal he got you there rami rumdum imagine it's like imagine the parents friends like is your son still teaching at harvard like no yeah no he got kicked out because of drugs went to india and then he's literally like having the the earliest version of these retreats were on his parents estates his day he comes from wealth and suddenly this fancy ass place and i think upstate new york i'm not sure where is filled with hippies who who have read beer now or have heard about ram das and they're going to find him and so essentially these retreats are a combination of people who are sort of moved by his teachings or by people who were there with him in india and um and they're all like super fucking cool because these it wasn't what i expected at all which is like crusty like uh new age people these these people are like people who like smuggled hash in the 60s you know these are like old school hardcore hippies who met this dude and got so like radically transformed by being around somebody like that because people you there aren't a lot of people like that but when you run into them it isn't like you run into someone at a rave and they're like i can see your chakras and you just want to you just want to go piss you want to get away from them as fast as you can yeah the story is that it's like you feel like you've been you've known them forever you feel like they know everything about you and they seem to demonstrate a kind of unconditional love that you most people have never even experienced for you that isn't like doesn't have any strings attached there isn't anything there and whatever that energy field is it it radically changes people for the better and so that's what the retreats were and um yeah yeah that's what the retreats were so then you're in maui in a city or like or like this was it the first one was at this yoga retreat center it wasn't by the ocean which was bullshit and they were doing these uh they were doing these like uh tour the spiritual places of hawaii bullshit and i was ramdas was i don't think ramdas went but a lot of the people at the retreats they were like driving them around to cool places cool spots to check out and um ragu at one point is i'm like god damn it i guess i gotta get in this fucking van and get hauled out to a goddamn waterfall i don't want to do that ragu is like you're not going with them you're gonna come with me now and he took me to ramdas's house and i got to i got i'm suddenly like in a swimming pool with this he's living in hawaii yeah he lived in hawaii he lived in hawaii this famous zen roshi roshi joan halifax like a like hardcore zen teacher ragu some other hippies and the zen roshi is carrying ramdas around because you know he had a stroke he's in a wheelchair they're laughing these are old friends it's like us hanging out they're all laughing they're having so much fun the energy in that house is so much fun it's so much fun it's so much fun it's so much fun man i can't even tell you what it was like and at some point for the first time since my mom died i felt like i was gonna be okay and right at that moment ramdas looks at me and he goes i want to talk to you he had this funny fake fierce thing and so then i'm like up in his house and he like wheels up to me and dude i've never experienced anything like this before because there's like something in india they call it darshan there's a formal instruction that can happen sometimes and he goes what it's a kind of formal interaction with a spiritual teacher it's formal not in the sense you're wearing a suit but it's different because you know i would hang out with ramdas at these retreats or eat with them it's different this was like something like those formalities go through not formalities it's just i don't know how to explain it other than it's it's kind of like a podcast i guess you could say in other words like right now we're having a conversation kind of formal conversation versus if we were out to eat or something right there's a sense of it's not seriousness but a sense of like this is real like there's something here and uh he just he goes uh and this is gonna sound that's the funny thing about these moments is what i'm gonna say doesn't put it on a fucking cereal box like it doesn't seem like a big deal but he he's like uh he goes you're here pointing to his head and he goes you need to get here and because he had a stroke you know he couldn't like talk like he used to be so articulate and funny and then he's like we can help you with that hey guys today's episode of you be tripping is brought to you by shopify guys whatever you're selling on your website shopify has got your back i've been using them since legitimately before they were a sponsor long before they are the best they handle customer interactions they help you build they're using their ai tools that help you build like like wording to like get your product really described whatever you're selling do it maybe you're uh selling your uh purses that you made on etsy because you're a dumb woman whose husband doesn't love her anymore and you need something to fill the void in your life are you a dumb housewife who needs to fill the void that her rich husband is left when he's clearly having sex with his secretary shopify will help you get the word out and then i know you'll be doing it to gain the love and support and recognition from your husband uh that won't happen but it will help you recover make a lot of money and then you don't need your husband anymore you can move on and get your pool boy and pay him a lot of money and you'll be the sugar daddy in the relationship do you want that shop i'll help you shopify believes in sugar daddying from women to pool boys what am i selling on my website well maybe you know you don't have a husband that doesn't care for you right maybe you have a network that fucked you over and uh betrayed you and says well i know i made you leave it in a feeling of i don't trust any network ever to take my product because they're gonna own it and they're gonna do something terrible with it and so i want to go straight to my consumers with something i've made because i believe that i should have ownership over it well shopify will help you do that and right now at orishafir.com you can sell the end um you can buy the end my new storytelling show go to my website orishafir.com you can see you can also buy t-shirts and stuff like that sure do that absolutely it's not going to bring your husband back in terms of like emotions but it will help you support outsider comedy start your business today with the industry's best business partner shopify and start hearing sign up for your one dollar per month trial today at shopify.com go to shopify.com stripping that's shopify.com stripping now let's get back to the episode and you get back to trying to gain the support of your husband it's not coming back once love is closed it's closed yeah you want to say maybe we can rekindle the relationship and sure that's not possible sometimes but a lot of other times it's off and neither of you have the courage to move on with your lives you don't have the courage to say hey this is over we both know it's been over and if you start the conversation sure the other person might go oh no i could work it out and then later realize oh i had a moment i had a moment that i could have gotten out and i told her no i still love her or i told him no i still love him and you should have like oh i could look back on that moment and go now i got stuck in this relationship for 10 more years i was out and i was still in my like late 30s i could still rebound i just don't have a life and i didn't do it and i regret it forever i regret it forever shopify makes no claims on that take the opportunity i'm ari shafir and shopify supports everything i do find love guys there's nothing more important at work than gossip it's what keeps the office afloat but you gotta be able to concentrate you gotta be able to see the signs margaret and steve are they boning everybody's talking about it everybody's seeing details samantha said that she saw steve leave within five minutes of margaret the last seven days oh well let's all go to tgi fridays today get a jalapeno popper and talk about it i didn't even get the memo they're going to fridays why because i'm out of it because i had that coffee crash that's where mud water comes in you want to be a little focused on the stuff that's going on in your life i'm not talking about work the american business place is failing we all know that no i'm talking about gossip pure american gossip are margaret and steve banging it's disgusting from both their points of views steve has three kids two of which he doesn't talk to anymore and they're all from the same mom so that's weird and margaret with her natural deodorant ew a lemon on your pits doesn't stop you from smelling especially if you're not showering steve you can do better mark you can do better everybody's talking about this on fridays and i'm not coming because i didn't get to all my work emails so i'm out of it and now they're all there and i'm stuck here talking about mud waters reishi lions made cordyceps every ingredient serves a purpose in mud water and none of that afternoon crash that you get with coffee you ready to make the switch to cleaner energy head to mudwater.com and grab your starter kit today right now my listeners get an exclusive deal 43 off starter kits plus free starter kits free shipping and a free rechargeable frother when you use the code trippin that's right up to 43 off with code trippin at mudwtr.com after you purchase i'm going to ask you how you found out about them please show your support for the show let them know that i sent you now what else have you heard give me the tea let's get back to the episode hey everybody today's episode of you be trippin is brought to you by cigars international do you like a good cigar on a nice day or even if you have an overhang on a cloudy day you can get a good cigar on a nice day or even if you have an overhang on a cloudy day you can get a good cigar on a nice day you can get a good cigar on a nice day or a rainy day that's my dream actually to get an awning that i can like pull forward that can smoke cigars on a warm day while it's raining i did one of those in they send you handmade cigars uh from all over cohibas i got a five-pack cohibas and that was really really good um it offers a larger selection unbeatable prices and customer service experience second to none so if you're new to cigars or if you're like know what you're talking about either way they got you so one of my favorites was in ecuador in the amazon i'm staying at this like hotel first week probably in ecuador pouring rain and there was this little like balcony and i could just watch this rain smoking a really legitimately shitty cigar really shitty cigar that i think i got in quito it's an ecuadorian brand called uh la libertador no there was another one about the fighter i think it was the same company the point is love a good cigar plus bring a bunch to a barbecue anything um man anyway get yours the cigars international um use my code trip in a checkout for 20 off your order of 50 or more or visit www.cigarsinternational.com slash trip in and the discount will automatically apply some exclusions apply um that's it let's get back to the let's get back to the episode and like again man it sounds like no big deal but like something else was happening and i don't know what that was but then you know like i'm crying he's like and i'm like oh i wish my mom was here she loved you and he goes she is here but it was weird because it wasn't like you know metaphorically she's here like your mom is everywhere now or it's like she is here and then this is where it gets weird we end this this very quick conversation we end this quick conversation and he's like uh he's like uh his cat jumps on his lap and he he has his twinkle and he goes she sleeps on my chest at night and i'm like cool all right it just seemed kind of completely not connected anything you're kind of ruining the moment ramdas so i go and tell my brother yeah the whole story your mom was into ramdas yeah okay so yeah so i go and tell my brother the whole story and i'm like and then he said his cat sleeps on his chest and my brother there's this long pause he goes you don't remember do you i'm like what he's like that's what mom used to say all the time that how she liked that the cat slept on her chest at night and so it was just a weird synchronicity because he just said my mom was there and then he said a thing that she used to say all the time that i didn't even recognize in the moment that my brother told me later and i think of those things as like time bombs and these people will plant them sometimes which is and they don't demonstrate this shit it's in fact really like uh frowned upon to do what that that they can you're not supposed to freak people out like that like you don't want to do like the dude in the game shows like says your mother's here and she's telling me this or that there's a very like kind of politeness to some some of these things that you might encounter around people like this yeah where like through time later on you realize what they what they were saying this is dune this is dune when they set in like all the stuff and it's like way earlier yes benedict yeah they're like it'll be paid off in a few generations bingo it's like that there's a there's a real like general um not prohibition but there is a like a kind of like uh if you make any of this stuff about like some side effects of it then people just go for the side effects they don't like go they they become interested in it because they want to they want to be harry potter or something oh okay so so then so then you just started like i'm in no i threw him down what i was like get my mom's name out of your mouth from us why are you fucking saying did he give you acid don't do your hippie magic on me man i know what this is fine i'll suck your dick fine i'll suck everyone's dick here i guess i have to i was already they're like nobody wants you to do that i know you take your pants off no um so no i wasn't on any drugs um and and again now that's another thing that like i started going to these things man with a real kind of lazy cynicism like a kind of fashionable cynicism it's fashionable it's fashionable to be skeptical and cynical about stuff that i'm talking about and i understand why because you you it sounds so ridiculous and we've all seen the cult documentaries and we've all seen yeah you gotta know it sounds like those things like those shockers it does and and like so the it's yeah so i so it's like the the the this was why i i i started trying to do everything i could to offend ragu because i i thought to myself if i can offend him if he says that is you're over the line don't say that then i know know that i cannot be involved he's a phony no it's like a cult if there's some kind of prohibition on any kind of freedom of speech then that means that it's fucked up it's like you got to watch out if there's like off-limits subjects or if we're not allowed to like you know i remember saying him once you guys were young then you met some guy you're on a bunch of drugs isn't this kind of just nostalgia aren't you just kind of like trying to get to your childhood again through this you're just hanging out with your friends and and now it's really edgelord and i'm like here we go this is it baby dagger in the fucking heart like now he got trussled and he goes is it great when you get a line where you're like oh right right on i'm like this is gonna hurt you yeah i got you good now and uh and i'm you know full full like comedian hypersensitivity like like fully watched watching to see what he does yeah and he laughed he goes i don't know maybe it was so real and sweet and he wasn't hurt he wasn't offended and um and uh yeah so i've been going back to those things every year since then this reminds me of uh they they did the ufc interviews with the fighters back forth back so they interviewed one like you're a fighter and then they then they don't interview me but then also what you said about about the fight coming up and then they'll go back to you and say what i said so funny so they had um anderson silva this and this one guy was like i'm gonna i'm gonna take him to the ground i'm gonna get on top of him i'm gonna i'm just gonna beat his face and then they're like hey so well he said he's gonna take you down uh get on top of you and like beat your face and anderson he one of the greatest of all time he goes i mean if he does that he'll win for sure it was so like solid yeah man do it it was no like what totally ruins the game destroys the game yeah so then you start going a lot every year i go to these things every year every year i go yeah and you became like what are you in the leadership there at these points are you just like taking the classes um well they let they like me to do podcasts there so like i i'll like i get to like like interview people um but you know like to me sort of the problem that started popping up is originally when they were letting me interview people i was like i'm gonna let you interview people ramdas thought it was funny because i was saying things that you aren't supposed to say like like i i didn't have anything to lose i'm not trying to be some meditation teacher anything like that and he thought it was i think he just thought it was funny that they were just letting someone like run amok in front of the this like whole group of people who came to a spiritual retreat and uh but then the more i kept going to these things i i almost started having to fake this cynicism and the skepticism like it's sort of what happened is it it softens you up it like it's really hard to maintain the the defense mechanism stuff and the shielding stuff and all that stuff if you have tricked yourself into thinking i believe you know i'm i'm only like fine you say this happened or whatever but i'm gonna believe my own experience but then when you start experiencing what it's like to be around um that kind of like love or that kind of not love in the gooey bullshit way but what it's like to be it's though it's you know you're it's like when you take ecstasy and you know when that feeling of like that moment where you forgive yourself then you forgive everyone around you then you want to you recognize everybody's just wonderful and trying to get through their lives and you have that experience that's really profound you can have that experience minus the ecstasy and that's why people have been doing this shit for thousands of years because there is a possibility for sort of not having to be so goddamn pissed off and grumpy all the time but um you know and and and so that was a really like that that over time um though i'm still a fucking asshole over time that that you know you have to be cynical about it that's your stance and then be like actually i kind of love this it's actually kind of like political commentary has that too once they get go to the meetings with them or comedians doing like award shows and then you're like well i've actually met these people yeah for me to like make fun of them or you know like go to cocktail parties with them think of fat comics uh-huh the ones who've made their whole set about being a fatty yeah you're mean to fat people they're gross lev ew who lev fur who's lev fur look up lev fur and how fat he is i can't believe you have like in your mind a list of fat people so fat and he got fat over covid so everyone came back out of quarantine who the fuck is lev fur this fat piece of shit he's not even that fat look at it look at the one in the middle live at the comedy cellar they had to move they had to move the word side to side to make room for his belly that's a fat piece of shit now down there is when he wasn't fat and he was a good-looking guy and then covid happened and pizza delivered dude oh ew that one he's filling up the hole all the way in the left all the way to the left yeah he's filled up the whole frame he's so fat like i it's disgusting how is lev fur stuck in your craw like what what did he do to you man i don't know this guy i never met him but you're you know when you're you're i watched your face yeah you crumpled when i mentioned get this guy gets this fat piece of shit off the screen it's disgusting get this guy off the screen what did he do what what did he do eat all he did was eat for like years well anyway what what were you saying um so it's like when you think of a fat person wait what were you saying sorry that's so fucking oh there's so many fats red band man dude uh h foley sagalos fat okay so the fat thing when you're when you've invested your identity in being fat uh-huh and there's lots of different versions of that that's dia said he couldn't lose weight he wouldn't be funny there you go or you know they're let's say you become one of these body positivity influencers and you you build a career on being fat so like your whole thing is like you got to be fat yeah it's okay to be fat they need to make plane seats bigger you know here's the i follow an account that's like like uh fatties of disneyland where it's like what the best places what rides you can ride what rides can't ride scooter lanes and so what happens when you get crystallized in that form is and it's very sad or or you know um the stoner comic all they talk about is weed now they got to be a stoner forever or whatever so when the and when they're like i'm kind of done with this smoking every day now what you're gonna lose your old fan base like what man come on do that joke about hog legs take your shirt off exactly exactly exactly so it's just a mess and uh that that kind of dawned on me is i realized that i had solidified this kind of hyper cynical sort of but i'm spiritual but also and i but i realized like i'm not this isn't so much me anymore and it's still there but it's just kind of like now i'm just like doing old jokes now i'm just like stuck in a kind of loop because i want people to think i'm cool and um and and uh what the moment that that got like that bubble got popped and that's what's so cool about these retreats is like dude there are these people who come to these fucking things like owsley's wife like people who look like that the the the scientists from back to the future like old school like hippies deep hippies it's not all just spiritual people it's people are famous in the psychedelic movement because ramdas was sort of the con the the convergence of you know new age spirituality and 60s site the psychedelic culture um so this you know a llama who is like you know someone who's like friends with the dalai lama someone who's trained in tibetan buddhism but they're all wearing like hawaiian shirts you know what i mean see you're not you don't know in this one one of the he comes up to me like taps me on the shoulder he's very polite he's like may i may i make a observation and i'm like sure i'm not thinking this is a fucking llama and uh this sound it's so to you it's like it's somebody after a comedy show going can i exactly exactly and also my inflated fucking ego is like go ahead you think i'm funny right here we go and he's like he goes you know that that cynical thing you're doing and he goes he goes you know in a few years that's gonna be the same thing as like saying groovy it's not gonna age well he's like that's just a fad right now and then he goes i know i know in buddhism it's called wrathfulness but it doesn't look like anger it's like direct direct honest truth you're good at that too it's good it's all it hurts stings in the moment but it liberates you long time long term you get liberated and then he's like uh he's like uh you know if you don't really feel like that way anymore and you're acting like that he's like it can actually kill you he's like it can make you have a heart attack because it puts you in a place you're not yeah yeah exactly and i was eric griffin said i said that to him once when he was i was like we were just talking and i went over to his like second chin and i was like what's this he goes what i'm like that's new huh and he goes i just started going to the gym yeah yeah after that he's like i'm done and it's crazy because someone can do that out of avarice of what you just did to that sweet rotund comedian and it hurts but if someone does that and the intent isn't to hurt if there's love there and then also if they've sort of practice some practice that then that can actually be the thing that that like really helps you and and had more than like listening to a hundred hours of audiobooks on meditation it liberates it's not gonna age you well it's gonna kill you being something you're not yeah brutal brutal but it is i mean you start being like a live a lie yeah and it's like i gotta keep living this lie it's just not me anymore you got it you got it you got it and and that yeah once your heart's not in it you're just like but you know the problem is we also we if you also grow a group of people around you based on your identity at the time so it's like dude that's the other problem is like you if if you do start having some kind of change for better or for worse yeah maybe you are like someone who gets into heroin and you've been hanging out with professional athletes or something they're gonna be like you know i don't know if you should come jogging with us on heroin anymore you keep falling down that's why i was my left orthodox judaism and we're like we can still be friends like of course we can and then it was like there you go forget the little minor stuff like which restaurants can we eat at i eat a lot more than you guys do that it became like we just don't have anything in common anymore or when all my friends start having kids where it's just like i don't want to look at your fucking baby pictures anymore like what wait what do you mean you're good about it well don't wait stop for one second yeah babies please i send baby pictures to my dearest friends and though most i get a card from you a year and it's okay no i send it to my dearest friends they don't write me back but i assume it's because they're so astonished by the beauty of my child yeah they're my three children four children they're my children it sucks that they're my beautiful loves that kid looks hawaiian that i mean tongan let's keep it real for america that kid looks tongan beautiful children beautiful babies um oh look at the bottom damn he's so cute actually they're so cute fat babies are so much better than oh they're rolls also black babies black under under 10 is way cuter than white under 10 jesus fucking christ ari why i feel like it's a podcast this is like jared from subway's podcast this is the last podcast jared from subway did did was there ever people at these retreats that were like didn't fit in it was like you can't come back you're just like you're not doing it right dude that's the really hilarious thing about these people is like you would think that right and for sure it's not like everybody there is all mystical and shit for sure i mean because this kind of stuff draws into it a lot of different types of people you're going to get people who are grieving you're going to get people who are dying and you're going to get people who think they're jesus you're going to get people who want to be the next ramdai so you're going to get people who want to be you know who think that they are these accomplished advanced souls and they show up and they're very loud they're very it's all about them you know what i mean they're they're and and and um you would think that um there would push back i don't think it's i think the the reason these ramdas retreats trick your ass is because it's in hawaii it's in a beautiful resort in hawaii than a pili kai it's fucking beautiful and and like so you go there kind of thinking it's going to be a vacation yeah right but it's an actual retreat and a good retreat if some part of you gets zapped dude and so like something will come up inevitably no matter how much you think it won't no matter what you think something comes up and so a lot of people are dealing with that there you know what i mean there has to be a lot of patience there's got to be a reason they went there instead of just to like the the the like fuck marriott in right yeah well it's like why are you going to that if it's not even a yoga retreat where it's like i want to work out but just so it's like it's that well because because he wrote all these books and that really did like change a lot of people's lives and also associated in that community are like a lot of like great like buddhist teachers like jack cornfield trudy goodman rosie joan halifax i mean there's a krishna it's so weird that they have americanized names it just never sat right with me they should all have those ramdas names and when they have like jones something you're like it just you know what my meditation teacher's name is david what dude it's such a bummer yeah i love him so much but like like you want you want them at least dionysus wear a robe i want something you know you want like but but it really that's what's very funny i mean that's why you know i have a different attitude now when i meet people who don't look like this or that because a lot of these people they just look you wouldn't my meditation teacher you would never know in a million years if you sat down to talk to him that he was like worked for years with chogyam trampa rinpoche was one of the great teachers of vajrayana buddhism and a real lineage of buddhism who was like one of the tokus who was as a kid taken into the monasteries and like taught this stuff you you wouldn't know that and uh and i think there's a kind of on purposeness about that too which is because uh it really that in our culture that doesn't really make that much sense yeah because also like the robes and all that stuff is kind of like a crown it's kind of like for that type of thing it's like oh wow you're like really this thing originally what the robes were the the saffron the orange robes that the buddhist monks wore yeah is that's what they buried like so it's poverty that's what they buried criminals in so it's like look how nothing i am not just look how nothing i am i'm like a criminal corpse get you something i remember just right now there's one of these guys i was at a vipassana retreat in northern thailand that's crazy you did that how long were you in there for i was trying to go 10 days made it five and a half six not bad yeah day every day meditating all day long wow i met some bad kids and they were like smoking eating oreos and then when curl was there and i kind of really wanted to like kiss her and it just made me hang out with the bad kids well that's an interesting thing about deborah one of the other bad kids not the one i wanted to kiss but the bad kids of a pasta retreat oh my god oreos like demons smoking and wow it's crazy how horny you'll get meditating for a long time so horny yeah oh my god i know you clear your mind and the thoughts just pour in a revenge or it yeah so then you meet this like cool traveler girl and you're like whoa you're sitting there meditating lusting away and so she was like well i'm headed back to chiang mai i'm like i'm coming i'm coming so wait did you guys hook up we kissed once yeah but that was it i was too thirsty i was i was like re-virginated i hadn't been jerking and doing anything for like months or i was time i mean over months so five days of meditating of a passion retreat is no small feat so there was this guy there a richer guy he was annoying he annoyed everybody yes he wouldn't sit like i have trouble sitting with my feet behind me because i'm on my my foot like goes this way underneath so i have to stand with my legs to the side okay like that instead of like straight out so that or do the fucking this one you know yeah but this guy would just get a chair and then he would also like munch on stuff and you're like shut up and he was like and then he also paid extra for like a private place where it's like and he would come late to things ah and and just make kind of noises and go and it was just like uh yeah and we do the slow walk meditation and you're like oh i got stuck behind that guy we all hated him yeah i think now he was sent as a test to us to be able to get full clearance it's like well i need so there's no birds or no sounds of humans out here there's birds i mean there's no sounds of a chainsaw it was sobering remote that that guy was our test dude okay listen to this this is crazy you're mentioning that i'm listening to this pima children book and this is exactly the chapter i'm on and she's talking about uh this idea that some of these teachers have that you actually need that they like it when they start getting triggered like that because when because what's happening in those moments is you're being shown your wall here's your wall this is something oh yeah oh yeah and and all of these teachings generally revolve around not turning away from that wall trying to fix the situation ignoring the situations running from the situation attacking the situation what happens if instead of focusing on what you view as the root cause of the fury what if we just take the story away and just look at that feeling right that's a guy who's doing this thing he's centering attention strip away the whole story so why do you care no not even that oh so you are taking remove the guy completely from the picture okay now there's just a feeling now there's just this taste yes and so how long what happens if you start just being with that feeling because generally when there's a um when there's someone like that around you want to get away from them you want to attack them or you want to try to ignore them and in buddhism these are the three roots of suffering or those three roots of suffering those are the three things those are the three things desire aversion aggression so you don't get the fuck away you want to attack you want to change the phenomena around you to to fix the situation and so the idea is what happens if instead of trying to change the phenomena and to fix that feeling we just start getting a little more familiar with that feeling what is this feeling that's the a little invisible motor on everyone's life it like it clicks on and gets you into some kind of habit some cycles some of us go and play video games some of us confront some of us like ignore and get depressed and and and so what we don't even know we're doing we think this is how you should respond to these situations this is about what happens if instead of that you just start exploring examining or allowing that feeling noticing so to get it to the point where you don't you don't have any any baggage on top of that as if you like came in you're like oh yellow chair instead of green chair yeah you're like i don't care i'm just noticing it's a yellow chair yeah yeah it's it's a that's a guy who does this or this is a guy who's angry about a guy and he oh fuck there's that feeling again and you start not realizing that feeling seems to basically be the same it seems to have a volume maybe where sometimes it's at a 10 sometimes it is at a six you begin to realize that the feeling seems to be the same the things that trigger it have different feelings different faces different uh there's different your plane didn't make it you're not going to make your plane you whatever the fucking thing is but you start beginning to realize that actually the feeling itself is always the same and so it could be that if you spent time with that feeling and like cultivated the sort of courage it takes to sit in that place instead of trying to fix it that in buddhism that it says that that that that self-liberates meaning that it's almost like you you take the flavor out of the flavor dispenser now the flavor is gone so you know what i mean in other words because you have confronted the feeling directly you'll notice that people like that don't quite bother you as much as they used to and and so i gotta do it with lev dude i mean lev is your guru this guy you need to go out to dinner with him you need to go you know what you need to do with lev that was my goo you need to travel with him i do interesting you need to go on a trip with him maybe a food journey somewhere yeah but buy him two seats buy him two seats you know sorry i never i think you're great ari i don't know why he's mad at you mitzi's do that with us i think sending us fucking chuds nearby because it was like maybe he'll be good but either way he'll drive these other guys to fucking be bitter and angry and maybe it'll make him better a hundred percent yeah and then you're going to be like oh my god this is what pima children was talking about you get in as if you you manage to curate a life experience where you're around people i think comedians this happens less so but you're around people and they just are like yes i agree with you and then somebody this is how she put it in her book suddenly somebody says to you i think that's not real at all what you're saying i think what you're saying sucks and then you're like oh what yeah how what about you uh me and my ideas and and and then there's two things you can do in that situation you think about what they're saying is it true or not if it's true great i will i'll i'll change my opinion or um if it's not true oh they're wrong or you do what most people do in this world it seems like you get on the team of people who all think the same way and kick out all the people who don't think the same way yeah this is how we get world war three that's how pima children puts it so it's like you want those people around you we get that as comedians you know what i mean because god damn it inevitably some son of a is going to say some to you that like stings a little bit it stings it's not just like but it's not just like you're an ass it's like you want that i don't like what you're saying one little salt in the soup yeah so do they still have these retreats now now that he's passed who runs them oh it's just the love server member foundation runs and they have different teachers every every time they're doing all the boone now too they do them they do what in boone north carolina they have them too uh but yeah they're just they're great man they're just like how long do they last for just like three or four days no big deal what's the food you've got your own they have a buffet is it like uh like buddhist with no meat no okay no there's meat yeah you could it's there's a bar at the napili guy that's cool yeah there's a pasta stuff was no all cabbage pretty much no vipasha that that's hardcore what you did is like that's like that's a marathon you basically just ran a marathon you wake up immediately go to some to you read something quick then go to meditation then you get a little quick breakfast after the monk seed and you can't eat once they can't eat so what they can't eat past noon so you quickly eat another one at like 11 40. yeah and then you're just done unless you meet a bad girl who's got oreos oh yeah baby i'm very impressed that's an intense five days of that level of meditation do you think it changed you at all yeah yeah i can't tell you how or why but like now but like for sure it's like you can face these things that's what it was where it's like what am i upset about this the revenge and the sex were two big ones because they're both like you got to get back to clearing your head yeah so the sex is going to come in then you're like did i ever tell you like how you get rid of it there was a couple ways where it's like you're thinking about sexual thoughts you're trying to meditate and you're going uh heel toe heel toe as you're the walking meditation yeah heel goes down toes going down i'm like now my toes going up now my toes going down whatever so now all of a sudden you're kind of clearing pops into your head sex and whatever and and then like oh you're passing a cave i want to take a in there and just bend her over and like whatever yeah and uh and then they go okay look at that thought like you said that's a thought of a human has for sexual congress you know yeah it goes you had that thought before now who is this person you desire now what's going to happen to them in 25 years they're going to age a little bit what's going to happen to them in another 25 years they're going to be an old lady oh yeah an old lady now what's going to happen 30 years after that well they're gonna be dead now imagine them imagine oh yeah baby imagine them dead you're speaking about imagine them in a helpless coffin helpless in a coffin and now maggots are like crawling in a coffin through their eye sockets he goes at that point your boner should be gone once you start thinking of them as this decrepit and now get back to heel down toe down that sounds like a very monk thing to say you see the to me that there's just too much math there like the like if i gotta go all the way through this life after i bang him down in a cave to the point of maggots in their coffin and to not be horny anymore yeah i'll just jerk off yeah i jerk off but but the the the what what the idea is is like yes that's a technique another technique is just when these things emerge you think thinking and just go back to following your breath all right because that's all it is it's just uh your thoughts and emotions yeah and again it's a process it's not like right away you're gonna conquer your horny and it's all these teachers talk about just how horny you get really when you're mad oh that makes me feel so much better and also that revenge the people i hated would pour in oh yeah yeah that that that was the most freeing part here's the really intake interesting takeaway didn't pour in the interesting takeaway is actually when you when you sit what's really happening is you're experiencing what's always there yeah yeah minus the distraction other stuff is going away yeah that's why people could change so much they're in covet where it's like actually i have to be at home now for six straight months what do i want to do yeah i finally want to make that kombucha or i want to like i should like spend more time with my mom or i want to cut out this person or whatever great every 10 years we do that every 10 years get on it jews every 10 years you just that's it everything shuts down for a year it would be great do you ever go to hawaii or maui without this yeah you do yeah you enjoy it there well yeah i mean like it's the most beautiful place of all time but you ever go to like out of the you know the moment you go out of the room you're like i'm not going to go out of the room you're like i'm not going to go of the resort like what i think is interesting about all those places is if you go off the resort path you got to go to the grocery store whatever and you see all these people who move there after one vacation and they fucking hate it and you just see people like melting down because or what are you a spear fisherman do you surf are you a fisherman like you just like drinking and you like walking around for seasons now you're living in this small town you can't get off of it and boy you're just stuck and i've met people who try to move there thinking that they were ready for that level of calm and relaxation they go fucking nuts i knew a guy in my writing class who was uh he moved there kind of retired with his chick with his wife or something like that maybe just by himself and he was playing golf every day and it was paradise you know and he goes i suddenly woke up one day i saw a straight line to my death he was like 60 he goes i saw a straight 30 year line straight to my death of golf every day hanging out drinking and he lives in like i'm that's not gonna be my life yeah dude like it just none like you if you're gonna live in hawaii yeah you better like you have you better have been going to a lot of apostasy retreats too or surf so methie yeah you need to surf like there's i don't like i or be born there and get used to it or know all the secret places yeah you know there's secret why it makes you horny too i mean everything makes you horny dude like so i fucked on the in a car on a beach once i fucked on a golf course right there in the um near black rock you were so let me ask you this i got caught they shined the light we're trying to pretend we couldn't like you're into that public sex no it was dark because that's like like that's it was just there i was like i don't know i hate it every time i've been you know that's a nightmare when you're with when you're dating and you realize the girl you're with come fuck me in the dressing room yeah and you're like dude i'm not doing that to anybody because someone opened like everyone's gonna be happy to see you getting fucked no one's like they're gonna see my hairy old ass my scoliosis wrinkly butt weird squeezing squeezing me pumping away like a like a chihuahua no stroke or anything just almost like a seizure and it's gonna stick in their head and it's gonna hurt their minds i hate exhibitionist sex and people it's not exhibitionist it's just it is exhibitionist you're hoping no one comes by no you like it the charge comes different things different things different things different things different things no it isn't it's a different thing every perv says that every perv has a way to rationalize so you now we know something about you you want to go to a private place to fuck i'll go into your trunk have you fucked in public more than 10 times what's in public oh my god oh my fucking god you're basically jeffrey dahmer like dude he was just hungry so you like banging in public i like banging and if that's the place to do it it's like all right but it just happens you end up in public a lot this one chick wanted to go into the like a construction site of a house and i was like someone's gonna see us i'm not into getting caught sure right here right it's great at the back of the main room at the comedy store sure but in the back not in the middle of the main room you're not a shoplifter because you just you're not into getting caught for shoplifting right i mean i'm i'm i'm liberating this stuff from the rich liberating anything from whole foods right ari so you're a shoplifter exhibitionist i steal but i don't i don't steal going look okay everybody i'm doing it i do it in public but i don't want anyone to say some places you tell me if you fuck there okay airplane bathroom no there was enough what it's so small i can barely it's disgusting i have fucked in an airplane bathroom no i'm not gonna high five that you almost did i don't you thought about it you thought about it it is the whoever invented the mile high club yeah the most expensive thing in the world it's the most expensive thing in the world it's the disgusting asshole on earth nothing is more you shouldn't shit in an airplane bathroom much less fucking one it's nasty there's piss everywhere tears diapers so uh okay what else okay um uh dressing room yes of course uh strip club you have you at least got a blown job oh you i know what you're talking about you're just gone broken up we had a friend who was like i need to get you over this dude i would love you to know the truth about what happened in there yeah you came back all like hi oh my god so this is the this is so embarrassing i'm gonna tell you the truth okay so yeah our friend got me a quote lap dance yeah but i think paid a little more than you would for a lap take care of them there was some instruction there yeah suddenly like and i this was i don't remember exactly it had been a drought i hadn't fucked in a long time yeah and so suddenly i'm in this private room at a strip club with you know a beautiful stripper as i recall yeah so like not just out of my league but like you know a million miles like so like like you know like if a god your sport like if aphrodite came in like your your horniest level and aphrodite appears in your bedroom right before you were gonna jerk off and you're you're just like this is a malfunction in the universe like this should not be happening the way matter and anti-matter shouldn't come together like this should not be happening and uh so i was aware that there's some possibility of her jerking me off or something and she starts grinding on me yeah i came in five seconds that's what happened it didn't like i don't know what did you do stay in there i'm like we gotta buy time what are you gonna do stay in there you like now what could have gone to know her i'm ashamed i'm humiliated she's relieved in your pants yes oh wow so now i got the sticky and the wet and the look of joy in her face i did it i'm out i earned money so fast this asshole off i just made a ton of money oh my god oh god this is a great day she's gonna go home and tell her the next morning her kid's gonna be like why are you in such a good mood i didn't have to jerk off this idiot last night and uh so yeah that's what happened i came almost instantly because i was around you guys i was embarrassed because like i just like instant like just just came there is a unique mixture of of sexual gratitude and shame that comes with coming in your pants at a strip club yeah a lot like oh god i can't what the fuck's wrong with me yeah it's you you well yeah because you you i mean it's obviously like a in the moment where you come in your pants something great's happening like you know you can be assured if you're coming in your pants like 99% of the time something incredible is happening in your life but then the next second it's the whatever happened back to reality what the fuck i can't believe i'm in this darkness getting grinded on by a goddess i'm ashamed mama i'm ashamed last time i did it with norman's bachelor party and i came out and see all these people that i know norman and fucking list and burt and derosa and just like they look at you just like look down right you just have to go like that yeah you just cover up the wet spot you're a bad boy you're a bad boy you're a bad boy are you're out there fucking in golf courses you're the one who came in your pants yeah i know but i'm a i i did not i guess it was a public space what's the most public place you've ever had sex oh god on top of a fucking water tower what i'm in community college i was dating this girl she was super kinky which i like that's the first girl ever put her finger in my butt and i'd never had that happen before i couldn't believe it like when it happened i couldn't believe it i don't think i was new i was just like what the fuck amazing and then but she was also like you she was an exhibitionist oh yeah and so she was like we're driving around there's a water tower so you know i don't know what it was maybe not a while all i know is maybe a construction site yeah metal she's like go i want you to fuck me doggy style up there so it's like fucking on top of a tower like no way to anyone looking up it's like oh gross like people banging up there like dogs and it hurt like you're on your knees it's not just metal is that kind of the great so it's like cutting into your legs and you're trying you know in those days i was trying to act like i'm down i'm into this so you're trying to do like some kind of like sexy fucking on a water tower but you just feel like you know you feel like you're in prison you feel like you're like on top of a prison tower that's the most public space and uh it was horrible and yeah there were a few other places like that too like in the dirt in front of my house it was though it's awful man public fucking is terrible i hope that leaves the culture all right let's call this episode i'm disgusted okay i love it i love it man well thanks for having me on i hope i didn't ramble too much man buddy i love that was really interesting i never knew what those fucking retreats were like yeah i would i would i mean pretty much everyone there is jewish because it costs money how much do these cost uh well there are payment plans it's forty nine thousand dollars come on or yeah honestly i don't know because they let me come for free i think i know that it's not like real cheap i mean it's in a nice resort yeah but i don't know i think also they i don't know i want i don't want to say that but i feel like uh if there's people out there really want to come you can't afford it um they might be able to help yes yeah i think they have like ways of doing that it's like college i got pissed so bad but i'll go with you once or i'll just go come to the next one now it's not the right time for that why because i'm like look how bad you have to be go pee man jesus christ duncan trussell everybody bye well that's the episode everybody duncan trussell thank you very much guys check out his tour dates at duncantrussell.com and uh check out his uh his uh podcast the duncan trussell family hour dtfh down to fuck hour i'm surprised he doesn't know that down to fuck hoes down to fuck hoes it could easily be called down to fuck hoes podcast probably a lot left on the table there for duncan should have done a down to fuck hoes podcast it's on you um he's also in philadelphia um cleveland la jolla detroit charlotte boston massachusetts the wilbur uh austin texas that'll be sold out already albuquerque fort worth where i saw billy strings at the dickie center he's not at the dickie center he's at hyenas detroit michigan and the brooklyn new york at the bell house in november get tickets at duncantrussell.com that's it that's all we have uh please subscribe wherever you're watching or listening and don't forget to go get my my new storytelling show it's seven one hour long specials pretty much it's seven specials we did a screening at the creek it was so fun having everybody there actually laughing at them it was really fun to see an audience laughing i'm gonna do every screening every time um i get a chance to do anything at the creek um that's it get them at all at arieshafeer.com right now go right now if you're like oh maybe i should maybe i should just go get them and then when your friends are over like what should we watch go oh i already paid for and downloaded arieshafeer's new storytelling show at the end it's the best stand-up comedy of the year no questions asked i mean it's not a wrong answer if you say that it's like if you say what's your favorite who's your favorite comedian and if you go shane you're like okay well i like nate okay both of those are acceptable answers i like joe list acceptable answer you know there's comics i'm gonna stop myself from saying it don't want to get involved in drama anymore and you'd be like that's listen that guy's good that's not an acceptable answer for that to be your favorite comic kyle can aim sure you can have that as your favorite comic certain people no not acceptable and definitely an acceptable answer the end is the best stand-up on tv in 2026 and we're bypassing everybody and bringing it straight to you so if you've ever ever wanted to support me doing crazy shit it's that um thank you very much duncan trussell for for for coming uh doing it uh check him out at duncan trussell at instagram follow him if you saw his story reach out to him and reach out to all the guys in the story send him dms leave him comments on any posts they make unrelated and go by the way i saw your story on the end and it was my favorite one or it was one of my favorite ones or i really loved it how about that we don't have to compare how about that let's get the buddhist thing that duncan gets let's get that gudrathi or whatever the fuck he is um he's really like ganesh he's our ganesh actually the opposite ganesh has multiple hands you know like six hands duncan has one ball and i felt the sack it's really unsettling you go like this and this part keeps going he takes they're both gonna go um yeah he's helped me learn to meditate in a certain way not in the goofy way but just to see what i get out of it i was like well i don't really meditate but sometimes i get i take an edible and i i'm on a plane during the day and i stare out the window i look down at the scenery and as scenery changes i let it i let myself get thoughts and i have a notebook on my lap and if i get a thought i might want to get back so i quickly jot it down and i continue to stare out the window yeah man he goes that's that's meditation sure absolutely follow that instinct i love this guy so much he hired me at the comedy store do you know that yeah i went in to apply for a job and he goes yeah fill out the application you got to come back over and over again and actually apply like get them to like hire you you're good and uh and uh yeah and he did he got me the job we became friends he gave me my first molly he gave me a tab of ecstasy um when ecstasy was just kind of molly it was a little speedy but um now molly's a little speedy but he gave me a pill one of the a dolphin or a buddha i think i think i might have been a buddha they had stamps on it so you knew exactly the makeup of how much speed was in this how much meth and how much ecstasy and i was like okay and he goes this should kick in hard we were out at a bar on sunset at a club whatever and i remember going like i don't know this is hitting yet maybe i'm getting like a tingling in my side of my mouth is that it he was like and i know now how ridiculous that was he goes no that is not it and i'm like are you sure i think i feel he goes trust me dude you don't they give me another half broke off a half he gave me that and then 15 minutes later i was like oh apologies for before i feel it now and i feel amazing there's nothing better than molly anyone who knows anyone who's done molly or ecstasy you know it because ecstasy has molly in it you know it's the best it's funny i got in uh trouble for uh and i shouldn't have given some to my friend i guess as well but it split people on people who like could have died and other people going it's molly chill people who have done it are cool they go no it's their best night of your life my friend who i gave it to also was like this is the best feeling i've ever had in my life and then later kind of spun out because his friend abused him don't ever do that to anybody there's a story about it on the end if you go right now to rh3.com that's the opening story do-si-do boy oh i couldn't be happy with it uh if you don't know by now the prologue was made by william child uh he's runs a studio in bristol called gravy mercedes he did a danny brown um uh music video he did a um trippy red and i forget the other guy's name uh music video all his stuff is wild and i could not be happy with the prologue but buyer beware because steve simone played it for his family he goes let's load this up and he loaded up the show that he's on um played the prologue and his mom was like oh my god and his chick was like oh my god they were viscerally affected by it william was listening they were viscerally affected by it were viscerally affected by it they were like oh and his dad was like this guy's fucking crazy and then so his mom was like i don't know and then at the end of steve's story i didn't do this on purpose i go all right say hi to your mom for me and his mom heard that and she goes he's such a sweet boy mr simone stale number one meatballs in the game literally nobody can make them like you oh guys i almost forgot to tell you ari shafir drew it's on netflix yeah i know you might have seen it on youtube netflix made it its first special so go please go check out netflix right now and go watch ari shafir drew and if you're watching from a country where english is not your first language well you got to change your language settings to be able to see it yeah uh go into the systems i don't know i actually don't know how to do it i try to figure out what's high and there was no chance at all of me figuring it out so but if you can figure it out change your language language settings to english that means if you're in tel aviv or jerusalem or iran or palestine and your first language is arabic or hebrew well you won't be able to search it out but if you change your language settings to english then you will ari shafir jew from youtube to your hearts to netflix helping multi-billion dollar corporations make a little more money that's the jews let's get back to the outro that's it everybody uh subscribe wherever you're watching listen leave a comment every week for the algorithm if you're watching just go down there and leave a comment you bake the system cook the system and make it keep popping up and get better and better the more views we get on these the better guests and the more interesting guests i can get the rob lows don't come if you don't get a lot of downloads so if you want crazy cool guests please suggest them in the comments i don't know who's been traveling i know the the lead singer of interpol i was like oh cool people said it we're close you know um getting uh i'm trying to think who else we got on on here was because of your comments uh uh um who's the drug guy that won hamilton morris was because you guys suggested it um yeah so many was because your suggestion like if enough people suggest i guess they've got a story because they suggest these celebrities i'm like have they been somewhere do they get into some sort of trouble or some sort of fun it's not just if they're a celebrity i don't care about that i need them to be have traveled in a way that david cross is doing acid with people um in the center of turkey that's the kind of i want to talk about i gotta get david cross back on um rayne wilson's gonna come on um soon anyway leave comments and that's it guys i love you guys i love talking about travel now i'm back recording new episodes and i forgot how much fun it is i did one today with tim butterly it'll be out in like three years i'm the bank uh that's it everybody until next week um how do you say goodbye in hawaiian goodbye in hawaiian let's see aloha bye everybody hey i i actually had to show what you see in that prologue that i had to um i don't want to ruin it for people haven't seen it yet but i had to yeah i won't ruin it it's a surprise and i didn't want to read all the trailers i'm like i'm i don't want to show the prologue because i want anyone to have it ruined but he needed to how do i say this but i had to show him for him to like capture it i i won't anyway anything you see in there of me is to scale i mean i looked at him like that's them that's them i do so different i didn't go like this i didn't do the wind anyway um it's a cross like i'm like this is what they look like when they're on the floor all right hello everybody until next week bye please subscribe you matched on hinge you're vibing then her energy completely changes what do you do i'm raven smith and i wrote this book for you and read a real love story about this exact sitch listen to the free audio book now