161: Haunted Words with Ali Macofsky | Soder Podcast | EP 155

I am still on the road through the end of the year, got two big weekends I'm looking forward to. November 5th through the 7th, I'm gonna be at Salt Lake Wise Guy. Salt Lake City Wise Guy. It's one of my favorite clubs in the country, easily pound for pound the best sound system at a comedy club. We're doing six shows there. I'm bringing my buddy Tom Thacar. It'll be November 5th through November 7th. Go to danceter.com and then December 10th through the 12th. I'll be at comedy at the Carlson in Rochester, New York. Danceter.com for all those dates. You can also go to punchup.live/danceter. Sign up, get put on the email list. So when I come to your city, you will know. That's the only reason we use those emails. It's just to let you know what I'm coming to your city so you can catch a live show. Also a punchup, we got the movie watch alongs. And guess what? Got another one coming. Stavros. Stavros came by and we watched Cobra. The Stallone Classic. Honestly, these movie watch alongs your fun as hell. And we could put them up on punchup where you can watch the whole movie with us and it won't get stricken down. So go to punchup.live, sign up. And that Cobra one should be dropping around Thanksgiving. But thanks for watching the podcast. Hope you enjoy the episode. Hope you're good. (upbeat music) But people that grow up in thick humidity, it's almost a superpower. Yeah. Because then it never truly bothers them. Yeah. The way that it bothers you if you grew up in a place without Colorado has no humidity. Well, but the way that the altitude is like training. Sure for them. This is a different version of that. Yeah, I couldn't afford an air conditioner when I first summer here. So my house was just, I used to take, I would wake up. I lived in a window in this room. Where did you live when you first moved here? I lived in a hoe-boken on a couch for seven months on my buddy Morgan's couch. Okay. They all worked in Wall Street. So I would, they'd be, they'd go to work at like, 4.30 in the morning. Yeah. And I would just move to my friend's bed. Yeah. Because I was on the futon and he'd go to work and I'd like, wait. Yeah. And they're like a little kid I grew up in. Did you know about this? No. Hey Morgan, if you're watching this, thanks. 'Cause that's what I'm doing at my cousins place. I'm like sleeping on the couch and then she like, leaves so early in the morning and then I'd just get into bed. Yeah, it's great. But she wants me to sleep in bed with her. That's weird. And I'm like. How much older is she? Like two years older than me. Okay, so you guys grow up close? Yeah. Yeah, so it's not like weird to share the bed. But I'm like, I don't want to be like tossing and turning. I want to be scrolling TikTok. You have to wake up early. I don't want to think about. The flipping around until you're in a bed with someone else, you don't realize how big of a distraction is. I move so fucking much. I flip and flop, 'cause I'll tell you, I know it's distracting for Katie, but nothing feels better than a fresh flip. When you're settling in, you flip and then you go. I do kind of like this like twitch. Yeah, I'm comfortable. It's like the most subtle movement, but it makes such a big difference for me. I'll just kind of tweak my arm a little bit and I'm like, there it is, there it is. There it is. But it takes so many tiny little tweaks to be like, I got my spot. You go no, right there. Sometimes I'll hit a pose after a flip and I'll go riding this out for the rest, and then two minutes later I go, my hip hurts. Totally. My hip hurts, my knees bent the wrong way. It is fun though to unlock a new position. You're like, oh, I can soup like this. Oh my God, I never thought I could do this. The calm, the sutra of sleeping. Yes, all the positions. You go, this one right here is called the dancing Egyptian. But I didn't realize, until I moved in with her, she was like, she doesn't move at night. Yeah, she has a hard time falling asleep, but when she falls asleep, she is. I can't even imagine how someone does that. Or you know what freaks me out even more? Back sleepers. Oh, just on their back, like they're like vampires. You're ready to die. I feel like, did we talk about this last time? Did we talk sleeping on our backs last time? For some reason, this feel, I feel like maybe, maybe I'm just personally talking about this a lot in my life. In which case, it's your brand. Yeah. I think you need to speak on it. Some forbid it, give me up. Sleeping on your back, for me, always results. And I'm just speaking for myself. I snore myself awake. So I'll be on my back and I'll go. And I'll go, who's snoring? Oh my God, that was me. And then I go on my side and I don't snore. Well, and you have such a, such a baritone, boisterous voice, I'm sure your snoring is alarming. But I don't, I don't consistently snore. Because I mean, have you ever dated a snore? I've lived with my mom. Your mom's snores? Big snore. Oh yeah, it was like terrifying. I felt like she was like haunted or possessed. It was like such an insane snore that I was like, demon has taken over my mom's body and I'm going to get killed tonight. Be as a bulb. Yeah. Out of my mother. Yes. It was horrifying. I used to have to sleep in a bed with my dad when I had visited him. And he would snore to such an extent that I would like as a little kid go, shut up. Shut up. When you're like yelling at your dad and you're going, and when you stop. And you're trying to like time yourself falling asleep in the three seconds of silence. You're like, I'll get there, I'll get there. That's the flip of snoring. Reflip and you go, oh, look at all this. Look at this, look at this valley, this crevice that I found of silence. And then immediately my dad by, when they're ripping it back up. Oh, yeah. Crazy. And they're like the lawn mower. But your mom. Oh, yeah. Well, my mom, you know, my mom and dad are longshoremen. You know, they're not like light, little, lovely people. They're. What other really longshoremen? Yeah. I mean, they're retired now, but they're both longshoremen. We definitely didn't talk about that the first time you're on the podcast. Your mom was a longshoreman. My mom got my dad into it. Yeah. What does a longshoremen do? So a longshoreman is someone, you know, the big cargo ships that come in from China. And stacks on them with the big old stacks. Shout out season two of the wires. Exactly. They taught a lot of us about the dock. Yes. So when the ships come in to the port of Long Beach, or San Pedro, my parents are there. And there's like a bunch of different jobs. So like you have the crane operators. You have the bosses. You have-- What was the White Helmets? Are those like the form of the-- I have no idea. OK. I have no idea. It's all a mystery to me. There's so many different jobs you can have on any particular day. I know that my parents would do whatever the easiest job was. I love your parents' line of thinking. Yeah. So people would always be like, oh, longshoremen, your parents must make good money. And I'm like, they would if they applied themselves and like strive to be a manager or boss or whatever. So they would just do the job that was-- Yeah, they would just like be moving the cars that had the cargo on it and transport it. Or they'd just be like telling people where to take the cars. And pretty much my dad was just smoking like chief and so many cigars on the job that people would be like, I cannot work after your father. Like anyone I've met who like is a longshoreman, they're like, oh, yeah, I always know when Larry's working, 'cause the cars wreaks of cigars. 'Cause he's just chopping. Yeah. What kind of cigar-- does he smoke like big cigars? Yeah, like, you know, like classic big Cuban cigars. Always been a cigar guy? No, I guess he used to be a cigarette smoker. He got hypnotized. OK. And then he was done for a while. And then he got into cigars and then became addicted to those. Tell a lot of my friends are that are into cigars. They were into cigarettes first. Bob Kelly, a couple other people that were like big smokers that got into cigars. And you're like, well, you just miss smoking cigarettes. Yeah. But then now he's like a huge cigar guy. Well, my dad was smoking cigars like cigarettes. He was having like six cigars a day, like back to back cigars. In your house? Well, once my stepmom and him split up, yeah, in the house. Oh, yeah, he just walk around. Nothing makes you smoke more inside than a breakup. Totally. 'Cause you break up, yeah, I have nothing. And there's just little remnants of her around the apartment. Like it used to be a home. And then once she left, it was a man cave. Would he have like ass trays with cigar butts all over the house? Of course, of course. Did you ever try cigar? Yeah. Did you hear that? You know, anything to bond with my dad? Did you ever smoke a full cigar with your dad? Totally. Really? Yeah. You feel like a fat cat? Kind of, yeah. I'll tell you what, dad. My bed time should be 11 PM. All this 9 PM stuff. I remember for like my, I forget, like maybe it was my 18th birthday. My dad was like, you have to come to the cigar lounge with me. And so I went to his like cigar lounge. That's his clubhouse. And had myself a little cigar. And I've never seen him more proud of me. All the accomplishments I've ever gotten in my life. I think me smoking a cigar is like the most happy I've ever seen him. I was like, look at dad. Yeah. He took a photo, sent it to the family group chat. Oh my God. Yeah. Does your mom hate cigars because of that? No, I mean, they're divorced. Sure. Did they work at the short at the same time? Yeah. And they still do. Well, now they're retired. But after the divorce, I'd get a text from my dad being like, oh, working with your mom today. And then I'd get a text from my mom that's like working with your dad. Oh, my God. Yeah. Who hated working with the other one more? I think my dad just could. - Because like, you know, I-- - The ex-wife trope, is it like the rejects wife trope? - Yeah, totally, and it's like your mom just talks so much. It's like my mom is just the punching bag of the family. - Brutal. - A lot of moms are, and a lot of moms-- - At times deserved. - Mom say crazy shit. My mom says crazy shit, but my mom's also sensitive. - Oh, of course. So if I ball buster, it has to be with gloves on. - Yeah. - It's not like, it's not like you could just absolutely dog on or the way you want to, but mom say shit, here we go. - And here's the thing, don't you think if your mom was down to get a beating every now and again, verbally, that it would be easier to not talk shit? Because I'm like, if my mom was just able to be the joke and go with it, then it would be like, okay. - Yeah. - We're all on the same page. - I would say, because I do stand up, it made me closer to my mom, 'cause she was cool with me doing jokes about her. - Yeah, my mom always, 'cause you use all the trauma you want. Everything I've done, say it on stage. - That's what my mom said the thing. One time I bombed during a TV taping, and it was like for a show about moms, and I just bombed, and I went to a bar. This is like fucking over 15 years ago, and I called her and I was like, "Hey, I really bombed." And she's like, "Oh, sorry." And I was like, "It was jokes about her." And I go, "I thought it was jokes I'd do about you mean?" And she was like, "Hey, if I put it through, if I put you through it, and you can make it funny, I'm not gonna be mad about it." And it really was like a great sign of confidence. They were like, "Oh cool, I'm gonna talk shit there." I, "Oh, then you're gonna catch it." But it was interesting as like, my grandma, I never watched me do stand up, and I had jokes about her, and then I would be like, "I don't think she'd like if I heard this." - Well, okay, so my grandma was really old, and like I wanted to put together a comedy show at her like old people home, 'cause she could not come out to see me. So I'm like, "That'd be fun, do a little comedy show." One, they never got back to me, whatever. - You're lucky. - Yeah, I would've been. - Have you ever talked to comics that have done shows? - I've done these shows before. - What, like you know what you're getting into? I'm not putting together a show to like feel like a rock star. I'm doing it to, you know, make my grandma proud. - You're doing the comedic version of cleaning a bed pan. - Yeah. - You're gonna get pissed and shit on. - Absolutely. - They're not gonna like what you're doing. - But I think they'll be amused. - You've never done one of these shows. They don't go well. - No, I know. - They go like, they want you to sing a song. - Yeah, I mean, but that's good. - If you're bombing, you just do a little Frank Sinatra number. - I did it my way, and they go like. - That's a lot of things. - That's, dude, it'd be funny if you're on that scene, and that's how you killed, but you're such a hack that people knew, you're like, step bombs, and he does my way, and they fucking love it. - I've had a few, and they're like, I look, yeah, like you could probably crune my way out of it. - Oh, absolutely. Do you ever have that moment when you're like not doing well, and you're like, I should just sing. - No, I mean, if I could sing, I would understand it. - I feel like that's true. - We talked about singing on the last time, the one that you love it. I would have to, I couldn't would gentlemen sing, I would have to, Bing Crosby out of it. - Or I guess because you're good at impressions, and like when you're bombing, does the thought go in your head, I'll just do an impression. Like what's your thing? - I beat that out of my own head. I think when I was like starting, I would be like, whatever claw, bite, whatever you could do to get out of this, and then there became a thing where I was like, accepting my fate. - Yeah. - Where I'd just lay down. - Isn't that kind of beautiful when you have that moment where you go, it's just gonna happen. - Yeah, it was. - Not every set is gonna be great. - Do you remember the moment you learned to do it? - I don't know the exact moment, but I feel like it was maybe like, I don't know, like two or three years ago, and I finally was like, I think I'm good at this. I feel like I know that I'm not bad at this. And so if I have a bad set, I like, I realized there was a moment where I go, oh, this isn't personal. - Yeah. - It's just sometimes it's not gonna be great. - There was, there's a moment where you just, where like when you're doing comedy for a while, you go like, oh, you guys don't think that's funny. What's wrong with you guys? You don't think that's funny? And then the hardest thing is where you go, they don't find me funny. - Yeah. - They go, it's not that they don't find that funny. It's, yeah. You know what's weird is you say two or three years ago, I'd probably say same for me. It was three years ago and I bombed so hard that one of the waiters walked out in the hallway and was like, that was impressive. 'Cause I just like accepted it. - Yeah. - I didn't do the things that I would have done of going like, how long you two been dating? - Yeah. - It was going on over here. I didn't do crowd work. I just sat in it. - Yeah. - And I had this joke on the last special we did about I'm such a people pleaser that I worry about leaving the door open for a mass shooter. Where I go, you know, like, oh, like they'd be like, "Hey, the door's locked." And I'd be like, "Oh, okay." And let them in and they'd be like, "And I do the gun noises." And I did the gun noises and there was just nothing. And then the guy to the right of the stage went, it's not funny like that. And instead of going like, "Oh, I bet you guys want me to talk about dating apps or whenever and like lashing out." I was like, so dating. I like, I just went into the next bag. Didn't even like, I think it helped me. - Yeah. - I mean, I did walk from the seller to New York comedy club in the East Village and I had, I called Shane like something bad happened. I was like, I bombed really hard. And you know, other cops-- - It's like, it's like a sexual assault. You're like, "I just need to like get this off of me. I need to share it with someone so I don't pull onto it." - Yeah, that's exactly where I went. I called him and he picked up and I was like, "I just bombed so hard." And he like, old school like, phone on the receiver. And he went, "Tell me girl." And I was like, "I want to have any men that need men that work." Dude, he was laugh, it's so hard. But you're like, you this, that's, that's part of it. - Yeah, well, I ended crazy because I'll see people who like, you know, to me are like my heroes or whatever and I'll see them do a bad set. And I'm like, yeah, yeah, it's just part of it. - I like an audience better when they connect with someone that I like when I watch them. Like, I used to feel intimidated about people having good sets. And now I know, now I like this audience 'cause I like this guy and I can be right, you're right to be into this. It's when they like something that I don't like that I go, don't go out there angry. - Yes. - 'Cause I'll go up and be like, "What the fuck are you laughing at?" That was horseshit. And then they're like, "Well, what do you got?" You're like, "Well, this is a difficult start." - Yeah. - Yeah, but I think. - It's funny the things that I will tell myself though, if like either the crowd is laughing at something, I don't particularly like, or if I'm just not doing well. The things that I tell myself to like gaslight me and to thinking it's them is insane. - Your brain will do whatever it takes to make you think it's not your fault. - Yeah. - That you just go like, "Well, the light was weird." That's why instead of you just going, "Those jokes suck, I need to go work harder." That's a, I think that's like not just a comedy thing. That's just a life thing. I think there's like a part of our human brains that just stop us 'cause I remember being a horrible employee at Bed Bath and Beyond, and being like, "Well, these rules are ridiculous." - Wait, what inspired you to apply to Bed Bath and Beyond? - I had money to move here, and I was working at a radio station at night, so I was working like 10 p.m. to 2 a.m. or 3 a.m., and then I was like. - Wait, Bed Bath and Beyond is not the soaps and lotions. - That's the bodywork. - That'd be crazy if I was working there. - That's why I was like, how did you? - I feel like you went to the mall with a resume and nowhere was interested, and finally Bath and Body Works was like, you can tell our life. - You go, new era. - They go, no, I go. - Zoomies. - No, get out of your Spencer's. It's like, don't even walk in here without a Nazi Osborne shirt on. And then I was like, what about you, Mr. Rags? 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Put your cash app today and make your money work for you. Visit our link and buy it. My friend's girlfriend worked at Bed Bath and Beyond and she was like, "I can get you a job." And I was like, "That makes more sense." And it sucked. But I was a horrible employee. I was horrible. Like you just didn't care about the job horrible? Didn't care about it. Didn't care about helping. Was getting like, "If you caught me on a Friday at the triple B, I was useless." Oh, I love triple B. I was useless. All right. P triple B. Dude, it's gone. We had this manager, Oscar, that cared so much that I was like, "This fucking cleave." And he was like, "I remember exactly when I started because I moved to New York in January and I started working at Bed Bath and Beyond in July." So I was like, "I'll work six months and I'll just stack this money for when I moved to New York." And it was the beginning of back to school. And Oscar was like, "This is it." Like we're storming Normandy, the beaches of Normandy is like, "This is back to school. We got backpacks. We got binders. We got pens. Guys, they're going to want to know where this stuff is. This is the section. Get acquainted with it." And there was a thing at Bed Bath and Beyond where you had to say to hello to everyone in the store. Didn't follow it. Didn't like it. Didn't want to wear my name tag. Again, horrible employee. Yeah. That I blamed the company for sucking. Those people, the people who are so invested and they're like minimum wage jobs, they're incredible when you're not working with them. Like to observe someone who loves what they do and is so fired up. Nothing makes me happier. But when I'm working there with that person, it's terrible. I worked at a movie theater in L.A. And the managers were so serious. Like very similar. Like loved it. Yes. And it was like, if like a big Disney movie was coming out, like some sort of Star Wars movie. It was like we'd have these team meetings and it's like everyone needs to be on their game. Don't stop. Keep going. Buckets of popcorn. Yeah. Kids with smiles. Yes. I think that's where we're in trouble is we outnumber them. Totally. Society needs more people that care. And I think we only make them stronger. Our disdain and our apathy for the job makes them even more fired up to try and like impress upon us some sort of you need a mixture. You need you need a majority of people that care like Oscar, like your manager at the movie theater. People that care that want to do a good job, but you need people like us for true morale. Yeah. We're very big on like going outside and having a cigarette and being like, hey, Oscar, shove those backcocks up your ass. And then that lady Kim that he's working with and be like, I mean, this guy, what does he jerk off to the coupons and you're like, you know what I mean? You put out your cigarette and you're like, I guess stack folder or some shit. And it's like, it's a ecosystem. So you like need both of them. Totally. And it's a family at the end of the day, it's a family. What they need to do is, and I'm very loud about this and I won't shut the fuck up. We need to stop with board members and venture capitalists. There needs to be people that own the store so that they can give back to the employees in ways, because how you foster people that care is, you reward them by giving them a livable wage, benefits of working at the store, caring about the store. There's too much of a corporate distance now where like, that's why bedbaths and beyond failed because they just became all corporate and they were just like, what's our bottom line? How are we getting our bottom line? It's like, give Oscar a raise. Give him a free backpack for his nephew. You know what I mean? Like, let me eat those candy bars in the break room and not threaten to call the Chewson Police Department because I, that's technically stealing the lights of me. Like, crazy. Like, that's what I see now is like, everyone's like, what's the bottom line? What's this? And you're like, dude, if you work at the movie theater, you should get free movie theater tickets. Free popcorn at least. There were some perks, but not enough to get me like passionate about the job. Perks will keep you coming back. Totally. And I feel like now, like anytime I go to like, I don't know, Chipotle or anywhere where it's just so corporate and like the employees are not taking care of it all, you'll be like, hey, how are you doing? And they're like, well, long day and I'm like, I shouldn't know. I'm not saying like, don't share with me, but I think people shouldn't feel like they need someone to talk to while I'm trying to get a bowl. Yeah, exactly. I don't want to feel the sadness that this job has brought on. I ordered guac, not extra sadness. Totally. Not a scoop of sadness, but that is also a thing of Chipotle's now McDonald's. Like when you talk to like Mike Lawrence or someone that used to work at McDonald's back in the day, they were like, you know, people were stoked to work at McDonald's. Yes. They were like, yo, I'd get the, I, I eat here, I get the free toys or whatever. And then it just became a thing where it's like, again, that distance of corporate to the employee. Yeah. Still out the paperwork? I just found out. I can't wait to break this to you. I used to work at a restaurant called Dos Caminos here in the city. Okay. And it was like upscale, trying to be upscale Mexican food. It was owned by this corporation called BR guest and they used to own like blue water grill, ruby foos, Atlanta grill, they owned enough restaurants that we had a softball league. So at least eight, right? And these were all different like brands. So like if you wanted seafood, you go to blue water grill. If you wanted Mexican food, you go to Dos Caminos. If you wanted Chinese food, you go to ruby foos. They were all owned by this corporation called BR guest. And the guy that owned BR guest was this guy Steve Hansen and he was very around when you worked for BR guest. He would come in and he was like, the evil boss from a movie. Like undercover boss five, not even undercover boss undercover boss. They're trying to understand the employees. This motherfucker was like, you're my soldiers. I'm your general line the fuck up. Very like, you know, he was very like would bring his kids in and just let him run rough shot over the restaurant on like a busy Friday night. So you're like, Hey, who's that eight year old on the line? Like demanding shrimp, and you're like, Oh, it's the boss's kid. You have to give. Watching these chefs who are psychos, I don't know if you ever worked in a restaurant. Yeah, chefs are psychotic. Watching these chefs have to like corporate nice because they bought like, Oh, yeah, we're in the middle of a rush, sweetie pie, and they'd be like, no, and they were just like shitty kids. Yeah. New York Times has wrote an article, Steve Hansen was boys with Jeffrey Epstein. Yes. He'll suck my dick fuck your minute, fuck you pussy. I stole so much food from you. Fuck you. I hated you. I hated your guts. Fuck your whole corporate structure is a ripoff of TGI Fridays. Suck my dick. You were friends with a hell, you fucking Creaton. Fuck you. I was so happy when that New York Times article job, by the way, the does Camino's thread came alive. Oh, that's exciting. We were making references, I've worked there in 15 years, we're making references to M manager reports and shit, we're like, dude, I bet this pussy went and did a private gig of the island because there was guys that loved working there. Yeah. There was this guy that was trying to fuck my best friend's wife at the time and my friend got fired because he was too honest. I got my friend a job. Is that like a situation where they're like, what's your biggest weakness? And he's like, I'm too honest for real. And then he gets fired for being too honest. Yes. How, how, how is one to honest? As one of my oldest friends, Zach, where I grew up with, one of my best friends, I love him to death. He's moving to New York. I was like, dude, I'll get you a job at those Caminos. I get him a job. He's working there. He's great. Works in the service industry. Fucking charming as hell, great at being a waiter. There's secret shoppers that come in like, be our guest. Uses to hire people that will come and just fucking rat fucks, you little feds. And then they're coming. I want that job. I'm such a narc. I wouldn't love to narc on people. I'm such a snitch. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. Like when you were talking about Steve, I'm like, that's the perfect job for me. I love telling people what to do. I love rules. He had his own delay in this lady Wendy that would just come in and scream at us. And one time I made a fucking Jurassic Park reference because she was in the building. And I made a Jurassic Park reference at pre-shift because the water started moving and she came around the corner right when I made the, I'm talking about it was the most perfectly time joke I've ever made in my life where I made that joke. She came around the corner, whole pre-shift table lost it. I do believe I got trouble for that, but worth it. But there were people that worked at the restaurant that like loved it and be like, guys, here's some up sale techniques that you work with. Well, the interesting thing is when you have a passion. Like comedy or something and a lot of these people I worked with were actors or writers or like doing a lot of other stuff My problem is when I do a job because I'm such like a little rule follower and NARC It's like we would not have gotten along if we worked together No, you would have been the bane of my existence. You would have told on me for taking one I mean I was a shitty employee, but when other people were shitty. I'm like, what are you doing? No, you can't be like that. What are you doing? You can't do that. What are you doing? We're shitty together. Get it together. That's the bond. Well, if I like you then it's okay But some people I'm like we might have had a thing where I we would have had each other then eventually like each other Yeah, because if you would have narked on me for drinking a margarita or the detailing vodka as I sometimes did Because we'd clean silverware with vodka and I'd come in hungover and I'd be like I'd ask one of the cooks. I'd be like we got orange juice back here I'd go behind the bar and porno or she's gonna take a little screwdriver Shit tastes like gasoline Dude shout out Barton's vodka. Oh, man. I'd have a fucking I'd come in because I'd be at a comedy I'd be at fucking cabin bar until three in the morning Comedy is a second language. I'd come in with my vision like this because I was so hungover Drink some detailing vodka have an egg McMuffin and egg McMuffin good lunch shift I just had a two egg McMuffins. There was a buy one get one on Uber Eats. God, I love God I love egg McMuffin. Oh, I was like I'm gonna save the second one for later. No, get to do right then Yeah, and you know what you do take off the top Muffin put a hash brown on it I'd have to do that tomorrow. Yeah, isn't that nasty? That's Honestly, if Katie knew you were talking such nasty shit Open the door To get springer. He's about to come out and fucking claw your eyes out. Yeah, I think like but hearing that like those guys That worked at that restaurant and seeing him get a New York Times article get ridden about it Okay, wait, but why was the guy too honest? Why do you get fired? Oh my friends that yes, so There was a secret shopper a.k.a. Your people Jews and no, no, no, no, don't do that Don't do that with these real don't do that with the current Israel Israeli situation You can't do that But the secret choppers were there and there are like Dos Camino's was really touting itself as a green restaurant. We're green. We're really recycled or whatever And one of the tables is literally why I got fired Then what goes hey, we notice you're a green restaurant or whatever Zackas now or not, and they're like, what do you mean he goes? I don't know everyone throws it away in the wrong. He's like, I'm actually recycled because he does yeah Colorado, he's like, you know, he's like actually got a green thumb and stuff and he was like now Did I recycled what they do here? They just dump cans and bottles in the same thing. They don't care. They'll put it in the trash And the next day the general manager who's a new general manager Lisa called the man who was like you're fired What are you doing damn you told corporate that we don't recycle and he was like, well, we don't yeah He didn't even back down. He was like we don't but I still don't know how to recycle I have to be honest. I don't know where the plastic bottle goes. I don't know where my yogurt cup goes I put it all in the same thing. Honestly, Zack would probably tell on me because I I do the same thing I just put it all I have a blue bin. Yeah under the sink. Just for show. No, we put it in the recycling bins, but it's like cans and bottles and paper. Yeah, and then people are like, oh, well, you know, recycling is not even right I don't know what to believe. That's the stuff that makes you feel good, doesn't it? Yeah It's like there's not even real Neil. All right, but then I'm like are they just saying that so then I don't feel bad about not recycling Here's my theory on it. Or is it real if we have to is the earth round? Well now we're now you're now your general whole different group of people who are going. I knew I like this It's I would say I am I know I lack the confidence to be a flat earth or If you are looking for eyeglasses of any sorts sun glasses reading glasses Just regular old scene glasses Warby Parker is the place to go I used to go to Warby Parker before I got my LASIK and I loved it because you get the eye exam there and then while Like while you're waiting to do the eye exam you can go pick out your glasses and then you feel good because when you buy the glasses You know that Warby Parker donates a pair to someone in need so then you're like oh, I got something done today Did something good and I feel good about it That's probably a good reason to to go to Warby Parker actually maybe the best part of Warby Parker like I said every pair that they Sell they give a pair to someone in need they've distributed over 20 million pairs of glasses to people in need through buy a pair Give a pair program but Beyond feeling good about it you can go get an eye exam right there, and then it's just like a one-stop shop So check it out and right now one by one pair of glasses and get 20% off any additional pair at Warby Parker dot-com Slash soda that's 20% off any additional pair when you purchase at W-A-R-B-Y Parker dot-com slash soda That last part was totally natural right listen as you get older you'll want to cook more Because then you you realize you go oh, I can control what I eat. This is way better I don't have to have it all salty or buttery. I can cook whatever I want Well, you're gonna need some equipment Enter hex-clad pants Listen, they sent us some of these these things are unbelievable 12 piece set It's awesome. It's I mean I'm talking about if you're cooking multiple things at once You're gonna want that hex-clad because it's it can do the heavy-duty stuff But I can also do the light stuff. It's a great upgrade if you want the core pieces plus it gives you the essentials without Overload overloading your cabinets and cookware. What it is. It's it's like the Navy seals of Pants because these pans do everything they're heavy duty, but they can also cook light stuff hex-clad is built for real cooking and it goes above the perfect conditions You don't need the perfect conditions and the right temperature. I'm talking about getting in there Getting your hands dirty and cooking up something whether you're making moving fast cooking multiple things or try not to get food Done without people already hanging or trying to get food done with people already hanging around the pans give you better control without making a clean up That's like a whole damn mess and takes you away from hanging out the laser-etched hexagonal surface I had to I had to look at that slow because I'm like that could be it that could trip me up But the laser-etched hexagonal surface is what makes hex-clad so different the stainless Steel ridges help with searing and durability while the non-stick valleys help food release easily So you go to performance without having to scrub forever. That's that's a smart man's way of saying it doesn't stick to the pan You cook and then you clean don't go on a football season with cookware that makes game day meals harder than they need to be upgrade Your kitchen with hex-clad and make cooking hosting and clean up easier all season long for a limited time Our listeners are getting 10% off at the order with our exclusive link Just head to hex-clad.com/soder support our show and check them out at H-E-X-C-L-A-D.com/soder. Yeah, I don't have an opinion Outside of comedy that I and sports fandom Sports fandom and comedy outside of that. I don't have opinions that I actually know are true There's just nothing that I'm So passionate about that I need to like stand on ten toes defending it. Yeah, same. Well, it was so funny because I forgot like how you know like Liberal and progressive my like comedy friends are oh, yeah And I brought my cousin to a little comedy gathering and before we left the apartment She was already saying stuff where my like comedy friend group brain was like and by the way when we get there Let's just not mention anything like that. I love that and my sisters think that I'm like this super like Crazy liberal look. Yeah, they're like they're like you're so extreme. You're so extreme Well, what's crazy is you you notice when you're around people that are that way is they're very similar whether they're on the right or the left Totally they have these little like haunted words that scare them and they go like what does that mean you go? I don't know I'm not challenging. Yeah, like I am when I used to go visit my grandma when she was still alive She had a neighbor that was like so far right that the way I dealt with her Was the way I dealt with people that were so far left in Brooklyn from 2010 to 2020 that were like I'm sorry white men shouldn't be telling stories anymore and you're like shut the fuck up And then I'd go see my grandma's friend and she's like you can't give these blacks anything and you're like yo Sharon chill. Yeah, but you learn how to deal with them in both ways Which is like talking to them like you're on your side and making examples of stuff that makes them look fucking insane Totally you're like oh, so I'm homophobic if I won't sleep with a trans woman You're like I'm just not attracted to that. Yeah, and they're like yeah homophobic and you're like you're crazy You're putting me in a trap versus like her being like you know, I love this country unless you suck the president's dick And you're like well, that's the whole point of our country is to not like our leaders. Yeah, so it is they're the it's the horseshoe They're exactly the same when I just realized I'm like man. I guess I seem like this crazy lip-tarded, you know -You're living all day and you're in the entertainment industry. -But I'm like, yeah, I do come, so many of my friends are so diverse. Like, I know so many, like, brown people, black people, trans people, queer people. Like, I just know so many different groups and I get to, like, hear their jokes and, like, their perspective. And my sisters, like, live a very boring, small, like, suburban life. So I'm like, yeah, of course you see things this way, because you're not, like, facing real people. -Tell you what, really bothers me? -Yeah. -Small, liberal towns. -Oh-oh. -Get the fuck out of here. -Yeah, like, you know. -Like, you know, you live in a small town, shut the fuck up. At least, small town conservatives, I understand. You're scared of the outside. You have your little tiny world. You're scared of impending change and doom. I get that small liberal towns. Fuck you. -Yeah. -Like, like, what kind of town? -Just like when you go to, like, a sleepy, like, and they're like, "Oh, we only use organic stuff here." And we believe that love is love and you're like, "Well, yeah, love is love." But, like, let's not act like you're around a lot of gay people. -Totally. -Let's not act like you're around a lot of black people. - kind of, like, Portland. -When you go to a small town and you see, like, black lives matter stuff, you go, like, who's the black guy? -Yeah. -How influential is he? -Yeah. -Because I've been to small towns a lot. And a lot of the times, it's like the reason they're so conservative is because they're not around people. -Yes. -They're not around Mexican people. They're not around black people. They're not around gay people. And that, to me, makes sense of going, "Well, yeah, you've never experienced him." That's why, like, there's a lot of Islamophobia where they're like, when I go on the road and people are like, "Harrie, you know what, mom, donnie." I'm like, "Well, I don't know. It's not like I can't eat pork in New York anymore." -Yeah. -I'm fine. You just, you know, I fucking personally, I like that Muslims pray five times a day. I think that's fucking commitment that I couldn't even put in. -Yeah. -I don't know. I think you just live around people and you go, "Everyone's just people and they suck all the same." -Totally. -People just suck. -Totally. -Then there's some good ones. It's like working at a job. You need people that care and you need people that are going to fucking talk shit. -Yep. -Because that's the best. I couldn't work at a company where everyone, and now all these corporations want people, I've seen online where someone's like, "Yeah, I didn't get a job because I answered why do I want to work here?" And I said, "The money." And then you see other people that are like, "All these people in our job interviews are just saying they just want the job for money." It's like, "Well, why are we lying?" -Yeah. -You think they want to work at your company because you have an idea. You fucking dick it. -Do you think it's also like there are these like societal norms that you have to follow? And it's like you can say you want money, but also it's like everyone wants money. -If you don't want it. -Why specifically do you want to do this job for money? -That's it. Why do you want to do this job for money? -Yeah. -And if you want people to stop telling you they need fucking money, stop making everything a subscription, stop charging for everything. -Yes. -Let people own shit again. And then people will stop going, "Well, I'm not desperate for money because I have some things." -That would be so sick of to go back to what you were saying, like McDonald's. You could have like a livable wage. I would love, I would love to work at McDonald's. -Yeah, but all these people. -Don't you think I would slay? -You would. -Can't you see me at the counter? -Oh my God. You know what I see you as? I see someone complicated order. Let's say they put in like four or five value meals, but they forgot to say no lettuce on one of them. I see you coming over with a swipe key and going. -Oh my God, I want a lanyard. And I want the lanyard where it's the really curly one that kind of, you can really pop it out. And I'm like, "I got it. Don't worry." -Doop, doop, doop, doop, doop, doop. -Yes. -That's the best. Honestly, even if someone that worked in a restaurant, I would tell you that's one of the greatest showings of a manager. When they come over to the micros and they go, "Swipe, poop, poop, poop, poop, your bills fine." -Yeah, I got it. -You know, thanks for, "Oh, you did something for me." -Yeah. -Yeah, I don't understand people who are against livable wages. -And you know what else pisses me off now that we're talking about it? -Yeah. -Okay, so to the opposite of what we were just saying about like, you know, "Oops, made a mistake. Don't worry about it. I got it." -You swooped in. -I swooped in. I hate when I am at some sort of restaurant or coffee shop or whatever. And something is messed up or something doesn't work out. And the employee is like so rigid about the pricing or like the discount or, you know, not making it right or charging. You know, say I asked for a sauce after the fact they're like, "Well, it's 25 cents." And I'm like, "Help a sister." I'm not scamming you out of a 25 cents sauce. -You think I came in and I put this whole order in just standing. -Also, you're not getting paid more for denying me the sauce. -You hate this job? -Yeah. One time I called a guy Mr. Enterprise because he was like, "We're at Enterprise." Trying to run a car and I go, "What is your last name Enterprise? Why do you care?" And the guy literally went, "I don't know." And I was like, "Because I returned it with dog hair, which I understand." And the guy's like, "I got to charge you for the dog hair." And I go, "I understand, but it's just right here on this seat. I can drive it in all vacuuming." -Yeah. -I was like, "It was the shut out the Enterprise in Hoboken. They have a shop vac right there." And I was like, "I'll use your shop vac. I'll do it." And the guy was like, "I got to charge you $100." And I was like, "Do come on. Let me just. " It was like one of those things where it's like, "Do you remember Robin Hood men in tights?" The Mel Brooks movie. There's like a scene where they're trying to cross the river and Dave Chappelle is there. And he's like, "I'm on the right side of the river. I'm on the left side because they're trying to charge a toll." And he's like, "I'm over here. I'm over there. No toll." That's how I felt. I was like, "I'll go there. Grab the shop vac." You don't have to charge me a hundred bucks. -It's crazy that you can do a vacuum sent. -And the guy went, "Okay." But I wasn't being mean. I was like pleading with him. I was like, "Dude, come on. A hundred bucks." This was like in the middle of COVID. -Yeah. -Where I was like, "You're already charging me this and this and this, please." Just, "Can I do that?" And then he went, "Dude, I got a chart." And he didn't say, "Dude." He was like, "Sir, I have to charge you $100." I was like, "What's your last name Enterprise?" They don't care about you. It's a corporation. And he was like, "All right, just next time don't have your dog in the car." It literally made me buy a thing that I put in the back seat now so that never happens again. So, thanks for changing my life. But the dude was cool. He was really cool. And he was like, "Yeah, you're right. I don't understand why I'm being so like." -I'm going to use that, Mr. whatever. -Yeah, it's like, because no one owns the business anymore. -No. -So what, there's a venture capitalist group that's going to send you an email saying that you were a bad employee? -See, and then here's an example of good, good person, good employee. I had a similar thing. I brought my dog in a rental car and I knew that I was going to get charged if there was hair. And so, before I returned it, I just, I went to this car wash place and I was like, "Can you just all do it if you have it, but I just need a vacuum in the back seat." And they were like, "We got it, we got it, whatever." And then I'm like, "How much is it?" And they're like, "Don't worry about it." And I'm like, "Thank you." And guess what? If I need my car wash, you know where the F, I'm going, that place. -That is the little bit of society that we're missing out on, is someone like giving you a break. I've gone like, dude, when at the end of my theater tour, there were a couple people that were like, "Dude, I want to see you back here." -For a second, when you said theater tour, I thought you meant like a play or something. I was like, "Are you?" -I did a man of La Mancha. -I did a tour of "Man of La Mancha." -I'm traveling by party. -No, but just, you know, they're more expensive than club tickets. -Yeah. -And I was like, "At the end, and shit's tough right now for people." -Oh my god, yeah. -And people were like, "Yo, dude, I can't afford it." And it's like, "Dude, I got cops, bro." -Yeah. -Yeah, I'm not going to cop everybody. But like, "Yeah, dude, like, I'll cop you." And I would also like see like, "You follow me, you're a fan, fuck yeah, dude." -Yeah. -I just feel like if we give them the sauce, give them the extra sauce, vacuum the car. -Well, and I think what's missing, and I think I'm guilty of this as well, is I think people aren't giving each other the benefit of the doubt. -That's gone. That shit's gone. That's what the internet took away. -Yeah, ever, like, I mean, I know for me, naturally, I'm always like skeptical and like not staying. -We should be living in a large city like a Los Angeles or New York, you should be. -But I think. -That's how you get, how you get fucking railroaded is by going like, 'cause I was like that when I moved here. Very Colorado, like, "Hello! Good intentions!" And then you get fucked over and you go, "I need to not be a fucking idiot." -Yeah, but I think if you just like assume that people have good intentions, it's like most of the time you're not gonna get fucked over. -Sure. -But I also feel like. I think like what's interesting about the manipulation from the top is getting people to argue against livable wages for places like McDonald's. -Yeah. -Because you go like, "Well, I already know the food's not food." So I'd like to know that people are at least have their lights on. -Yeah. -And they can afford, like, when you find out that like, there's a couple of years ago, Walmart employees couldn't afford stuff at Walmart. And you're like, "You know, Walton family, what are you doing?" -Yeah. -And it's like, I think it's so funny to immediately get labeled liberal. Where you're like, "Why?" Because I don't want rich people fucking over or poor people. -Yeah. -Just like, they were like $15, boomers do it a lot. Where they're like, "Oh, so now you're gonna make $17 an hour working in McDonald's?" -Yeah, everything's so expensive. -Yeah, so expensive. -Houses cost 300 bucks when you were our age. -Yeah, yeah. -Fuck off, you old fucks. You're losing your mind. Why don't you send me another AI picture of the Pope and the Trump and his steel cage mask. actually fucking idiots. It's like, yeah, pay people a livable wage. What do you own the company? Why you care? - Yeah. - A lot more people just need to have empathy for people that have shitty jobs that don't wanna be there. - Yeah. - And it's like you should at least make enough to pay your rent. - Yeah. - You shouldn't have to have two shitty jobs. Our country's farther enough along that you shouldn't have to, like I have a buddy who works and then goes and does Amazon fulfillment center at night. And you're like, dude, that guy, you know, that's my buddy. And I'm like, dude, what are you doing? He's like, I don't know, I just can't fucking, and then like, I gotta watch Bezos's wife walk the fucking galor mechala being like, aren't I a sexy lizard? Oh, wow, the fucking Bezos is nerd-ass. You could take all the TRT and fucking hormones and you're a fucking dork. You won't guide the nerd. - Bezos looks crazy. He does a little long guy. - Hey, I have my little fisheye. - It is fucking ex-wife is just donating. - Love it. - Mackenzie's like, what do you want? Seven billion? - Uh-huh. - Who's this guy? Russell guy? - Russell guy? This is fun. - Yeah. - I just talked to my aunt for Russell. - There's a Russell man. - Yes. - And he has a show. Maybe I'm like the food and he eats everything on the menu. - You're talking about Braun Strowman. - I like his voice. - Yeah, you're talking about Braun Strowman, former member of the Wyatt family. - Okay. - Giant guy. Huge guy. - Big guy. - Yeah. - His job. I'm like, so you can just go to any restaurant and eat every single item on the menu. - Yeah, they are. - And we're calling that a show. - Yeah, we do like 20 plates in front. - Yeah. - It's on USA, I watch it. - Yeah, I watch it. It was a between-law-n-order-ass-for-you episode. - Got him right. - And I was like, well, it's on. I'm not changing the channel. - Who's the one who died? The Russell man. - Who? - Yeah. - He had like a, I feel like his name started with the Scottish. - Scott Hall? - No, no, no. It was like a beep, beep, beep, beep name. - Macho Man Randy Savage? - Nope. - Scotty Tuhati? - No. - Scotty Tuhati was-- - I like that, though. - Scotty Tuhati, his vibe. - He was like, late 90s, early 2000s would do the worm, and he had like bleached hair. - Oh, fun. - Jerry the King Lawler son, I believe. - Okay, can I ask probably another dumb question? - Let it rip. I love these. - MC Hammer is not in the Russell universe at all. He just has crazy fun outfits. - Yes. - Okay. - MC Hammer's the fucking man. - He would be a good Russell guy, right? Just in terms of like persona and vibe. - Oh, 100% the man's the glasses. - Like he gets in the ring and he's doing the dance. - Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh. - Who come to Hamilton? - Oh, oh, oh. - MC Hammer's the motherfucking man. - Yeah. - Do you know about MC Hammer? - No. - This dude, as a child, was a bat boy for the Oakland days, he is like Oakland royalty. He's also a bad motherfucker. Look it up on YouTube. I've talked about this a couple of times. - Okay. - There he's been an interview with Outcast 20 years ago. And they're talking to Outcast, Outcast is laughing. And they go, run up on MC Hammer. Run up on MC Hammer, get your ass whooped. And then that, for some reason, sparked my interest. And someone made a YouTube documentary about MC Hammer. He's a legit badass. He's like a badass, dude. Put Oakland on his back. Shout out MC Hammer. - MC Hammer. - Also, that album, Hammer, don't hurt him. It's fucking good. I know, this is me, this is me selling some of those. But it is, we got to pray. The world could use more of that. - Okay. - We've got to pray just to make it today. - Okay. - I'm smooth, rough. That song rules. Obviously, you can't touch this. - Can't touch this. - Too legit to quit. - Oh, that's MC Hammer. - Too legit. - Too legit to quit. - Hey, hey, too legit. - Too legit to quit, hey. - Yeah, dude. The Adam's Family song from the first movie. The Adam's Family, you never heard of it? - No. - Yo, MC Hammer. - What a wild. - MC Hammer is my guy. And I will, I'll fight for it. - Yeah, who would have thought that this was Bark? - Shout out, dude. Shout out my fucking grandma raising my dad and aunt in East Oakland for a little bit. - Oh. - And then they moved out to Walnut Creek. - Oh. - Adam's Family. Adam's, Adam's Groove. - Yeah, it's like that storytelling rap where he's like, I was in the cut. I love MC it, dude. I fucking, dude, I'm gonna download his greatest hits. Too legit to quit. I might've been wrong. That might not have been on. - Hammer don't hurt. - Hammer don't hurt him. But Hammer don't hurt him is, please Hammer don't hurt him. - Please, please back in. - Please. - Yeah, too legit to quit wasn't on that. My bad. Here comes the Hammer though. The one that starts off the album, so underappreciated. - We need to bring back like fun. - I love this shit. You should've got all his money. And shout out to the 357 girls for always being there to dance. Shout out his whole crew. - Yeah. - Shout out to Hammer Castle. Shout out to him being in the Geico commercial now. - Yes. - 'Cause he's on the construction site. - Yes. - Yeah, dude. MC Hammer fucking rules. Please watch the documentary about him on YouTube. - Okay. - 'Cause you will come out being like, dude, I'll never fuck with MC. - I love a YouTube doc. That's all I do on the road. That laptop, if I'm on the road, that laptop will be open. And it will just be a documentary. - And it'll be a scalding hot. - Scalding hot to the top. - Making crazy noises. - Trash. - Like that. Like by AC, they just kick on. Mm. And I'll be smoking a one-hitter watching a movie about why Darren Arnofsky never made a Batman movie. Where it says me going like, "Oh, oh, that's why that casting didn't work out." I love, all my feed is like documentaries of why movies with certain guys didn't work. Like a Leo in Boogie Nights. - Mm. - It's first choice. - Mm. - And then he took Titanic over Boogie Nights. - Wow. - And that crazy. - I wonder what would have happened. - I don't know, it's perfect because then Leo was like, "Oh, you should hire my buddy Mark Wahlberg, "who I was just in the basketball diaries with." And Mark Wahlberg, even though he regrets making the movie, - Why? - 'Cause he's Christian now. Mark Wahlberg is the perfect Eddie Adams/Durkey. - Yeah. - His government name is Eddie Adams from Torrance. - Torrance, California, Longshoreman. - Well, it's crazy. I never knew your parents were longshoreman. - Yeah. - Did you ever have interest in getting into that? - So, yes and no. I, like, you know, 90 day fiancee, like marrying for a green card. - Sure. - I would marry someone right now who's a longshoreman just to get the health insurance benefits. - It's a good. - It's so good. - So you and Adam from growing up. - Oh, yeah. From zero to 26, I was locked. I was at the doctor day in, day out, getting from teachers in the weight group. - Oh, absolutely. - Dental and vision? - Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. I was getting, like, Gucci glasses for, like, a dollar. - Ah. - Yeah, I was showing up to school, styling. - I was giving-- - If you're under 26 and you're watching this, nothing hits like your parents' health insurance. - It's incredible. - Oh, fuck a co-pay. I don't even know what that meant until I was 27. - I would get, like, a massages at, like, in third grade. My mom would pick me up from school. I'd get a massage because I was, like, covered by my insurance as long as I saw the chiropractor. - You're a welfare queen. - Yes. Absolutely. - I was living, like, the bougie lifestyle off this insurance. - Yeah, I, when it ended, like, finding out that you're not, you're like, "So, what do I do?" and they go, "Get out." - Yeah. - And you know, but, but, but, but. - Well, I-- - I had minds 'til I was 24. 'Cause I remember the last time I went out, I was like, "This is it, do everything." - Yes. - Take my blood, take my bone marrow, take whatever the fuck you need, please don't-- - I did, like, a big, like, my 25th year of life, leading up to 26. I did all of the appointments. And these are all my doctors from, like, childhood. - Yeah. And so I was like, "So this is gonna be my last, my last time seeing you." And they're like, "You can come back. Like, we'll help you out." - We're in charge of the fuck that you've been-- - Thank you so much. - Shaking as you did. I've loved it. - Thank you. - I was here without insurance. And then my buddy Eli, who I worked with it does-- - Do we legally need to have insurance? Because I really want to cancel my health insurance. - I'm getting butt fucked by Cobra. - Yeah. - Cobra is-- - Kaiser Permanente is eating my ass nasty, so-- - Cobra's just, eh, and I'm trying to get on-- I got to make enough money through SAG so I can get back in. 'Cause that's billions. I got that fucking health insurance, it was sick. Sack health insurance is-- - But do we legally need, like, will I get-- - Yeah, I think of something with the Obamacare Act. - Such a scam. - The Affordable Care Act, as it's known by get my Obamacare Act here is, I think you have to have, like, you at least have to, like, try. Dude, when I didn't and no one gave a fuck during the Bush years, my buddy Eli was, like, go to Bellevue Hospital. It's one of the, at the time, I don't know if it's still true, it was one of the only non-profit hospitals in the United States, and you could go and talk to a financial manager, and they'd give you this red card, 25 bucks, see a doctor. - Whoa. - General practitioner, 25 bucks, showed him the red card. - Have you seen the TV show The Nick? About the-- - Yeah, I auditioned for that. - Did you? - What's his name? - Not Javier Bardem. - No, no, no, not, not, not, uh, oh, he's got a weird little name. - It's, he looks like Javier Bardem. - Kinda. - The Nick is with the old surgery. - Yes. - Yeah. - And the guys addicted to-- - Five dollars. - Yes, Clive Owen. - He's great. - He's sexy. - Yeah, that was a showtime show. [BLANK_AUDIO] - It's shooting up crack between his toes before surgeries. - Yeah. - That's old New York. - Yeah, that shit rules. - Yeah. - Is it a good show? - It's such a good show. - All right. - It's incredible. - I'm finding stuff to binge. I might binge them. - It's a good binge, good binge. - I just finished Daredevil. - Oh, that doesn't sound like-- - It's boy stuff, it's little boy stuff. I like, you know, sometimes you've got to get shit that just completely brings you joy. - Totally. - That's why these people send me these little figures. - Yeah. - But it fucking rules. I get like packages and stuff and I'm like, oh, someone sent me a fucking cool last figure. That's a fan that takes specials and turns them into cassettes. - You got Joe list. - I got Joe list. - Jay. - Big J. I got Jordan Jensen. - Oh my God, Big J crushed it and Netflix is a joke. It was so fun to see him do stand up. - Oh, you watched him do stand up. - Yeah, so everyone, it was so funny. It was like the jelly roll show. - Oh yeah, the Greek, yes, I left the morning of that 'cause I was talking to Jay about it, did you do it? - No, I went and watched, hung out. And everyone was like running roast jokes and then Big J was like just doing his material and it was so good. 'Cause it's like no shade to the comics, but they already know what jokes they're gonna do by that point and it's like kind of just an easy laugh. I'm like, you guys are founding it in for this show. - You guys are reading off a paper. - Yes, and Big J just did a set and it was so funny. - It's so funny. - It's so good. - People don't understand watching Big J in the room is one of the most fun you'll have and like he is just so, he's the funniest human being I've ever met. And just watching him like dissect a room. It's like when we, when inside shows first came back to New York after COVID, Katie and I would just go hang out and watch Jay, even if I wasn't on the show. - Yeah. - Like we'll just go get high with Jay and Christina watching the show. It's so fun. - Yeah, and he's such a, he's such a good hang. - Great hang, it's, now you gotta understand, it's summer season, which means you're gonna catch me at his pool. - Oh, he's got a pool. - This year he's introduced that we do night swims. So I'll be over there after, it's weird as like the radio show I left, I'll be going over to his house after he's done on that show to swim with them. - Yeah. - And people are like, they hate each other and I'm like, are you done with the ball fight? I wanna come swim. - Yeah. - I wanna come jump in your pool. - That's so fun. - Yeah, I wanna pool. - You guys should, you guys should skinny that way. - Yeah, way. - Not in your 40s, not in your 40s. - Yeah. - You're outta your fucking. - No, you guys should skinny that way. - You. - Yeah. - We both go like, yeah. - I think that would be fun. I think it would be bonding. - No, Katie's the only one that could see me naked in my elderly years. She only gets to see my weird great chest hair. But maybe her saying you and Big J both naked will make her appreciate you naked more. It'll bring you guys closer. - I'm not gonna fat shame my friend. Am I friends not fat anymore? - Not even fat shaming, just, you know, different body shaming. (laughing) - You're trying to propose a naked bonfire. - Well, I just, I love going to like, we spot with friends. - Yeah, that's an honor. - Like I love when people are naked together. I think it just brings you closer. - You know, there's somewhere that that would probably do a lot of good. - Yeah. - But not here. (laughing) But not here, not now. Nallie McCoffsky's fucking hilarious. Please watch anything she does. Thank you for coming on the podcast again. - Thank you for having me. - Is there anything you need to plug specifically? - Well, just touring dates. AllieMcCoffsky.com. And then, yeah, I'll be putting stuff out at some point. So just, you know, not Allie Mac on Instagram. - There you go. - Good to see you. - Good to see you too. Have fun in the humidity. - Thank you. (upbeat music)