HAUNTED HAYRIDE: Corn Mazes + Screenshots

The following podcast is a dear media production, the following podcast is a dear media production. I'm Benito Skinner. I'm Mary Beth Brown and this is right right That's my big try everything bit that Mary Beth continues to love to this day first things first obviously a They have we're not condoning the police the police in Zotopia investigate corruption so that's what we're you know they take down the fat cats at the top Mm-hmm that's the thing the wolves in sheep's clothing. This is oh sheep's wait, but yeah, totally exactly So welcome to the Halloween episode of ride we are both single and we're trying to get dig down And this is kind of the only thing we hadn't tried We continued to you know, we're getting dogged a little bit, but I I would say we're resilient We're brilliant and we still got it kid. Why does the cage bird sing? Well, I could never answer that what I can say is you are always cute Thanks, and I can't stress enough. I think there's some of you out there. I'm not trying to make you compliment me I think you might be sexually attractive to me as this fox. Well, I have these head pads in that I just I mean this uh look at this little snatched little I almost fell no Sam Nikki your bobby's So I'm serving body body tea. I can't stress enough that this episode might have to be watched Well, let's just say listen to it first and then watch it watch when you get home Because whatever you're picturing. It's so different. It's different You know what I look like more so than even Nick but from Zootopia It's fantastic Mr. Fox. Yeah. Do you remember George Clooney in that? Of course. I tried to do that fox as well Yeah, he had swag. He was sexy because all the game foxes get me last night. They're talking about me. Yeah So yeah, this is Halloween. This is how we're doing it. We'll see who shoots their shot. It's just a normal episode of ride Yeah, it is their Halloween episode. It's what's it called the suitacular. Yeah, the ride. I don't want to hear right. Yeah. So I guess We should just start with we would never not come to dinner. So someone did a TikTok about The deep cuts from ride. Can you just keep your composure? Okay, so I'm gonna do a TikTok asking for everyone's favorite deep cuts So not come on your plunk. Not this chick woke up in my house like things that we haven't brought up in a while And someone wrote we would never not come to dinner from selling sunset I would just had completely like escaped me and I just love the concept and I'm pretty sure That they then didn't go to dinner. So that's so we've just been saying like we would never not come to dinner We would never not come to dinner and it's something that like I think about in my bones like I got what they meant so deeply like I would never not come to it like I'm in it if there's a reservation like I'm pulling up Well, I'm coming to dinner. I would never come to dinner I believe it was in Cabo at the restaurant where you kind of almost had to go on like a lily pad to get to the area where We're eating your top. Your top. It was American Injury or make a fashion But do it in Luba tongue Luba tongue But yeah, we would never not come to dinner period Just wanted to touch on that briefly. Oh, can I talk to you about anyway? So I almost wrote for this word, but I've just like after icebreakers. I've been more thoughtful No, I had a problem with that episode. I don't know why you're so self-conscious about it I don't know. I'm working through all of this. Okay. I'm taking off my shoes because there's no point. Oh, yes Same and they're really what minor like somewhere in Times Square. I think a lot of people aren't even acknowledging the fact that earlier today Yeah, we were in Times Square So yeah come and get me boys So come and get us come get us. Hey, maybe together. We don't even know it this way at the same Jam time. I love paris this time of year Anyway, anyway, I can't stop thinking I guess in my new era, which I have a big announcement coming again I'm just trying to shake these Well, you know, our daughter who wrote for the hard reset. Uh-huh. Well, she got into my head somehow. Yeah, she in the wizard So I am moving to New York. Oh cool I wanted to tell people. Oh, I didn't know that's what the announcement was. Oh, yeah, you just you just acted like I found that out for the first time Yeah, I think it's the teeth The bunny teeth that are so cute Laurel having to flip the teeth up with a q-tip to paint my mouth ice couldn't stop that I kept turning and I can't get over it pinky. What a good girl. She was such a good girl We were getting prosthetics and she wasn't even scared of me She's just like we kind of look more like now. What were you gonna say about anyway though? So anyway I just I want to ride for this word because it's like you'll just be talking to like If you're talking to somebody and somebody so if you're talking to somebody If you're talking to something in somebody Say it again. Please let me quickly shit my pants. Anyway, um, so if you're talking to somebody and like I don't know You're interrupted or they say something strange like they say something out of pocket but in a bad way. Yeah, you just go Anyway, but I don't even use it that much. I just love when it's applied like I love watching you do it I love like I'm just and I am doing it anyone holding their power going Anyway, um, and that to me a goose bumps. Yeah, you're pivoting And you're taking control of the narrative and the conversation. It's kind of like hey, you just made me sick. So We're gonna actually I was gonna read to I was gonna tie up my shirt again, but it actually doesn't matter Because we're done after this. Yeah, we already went to Times Square. I've been to Times Square like six times this year Yeah, I'm like I can't get it. Maybe this could be like one of the last times we go. You shit your pants this year So we've been talking a lot about top bottom verse, you know my whole thing is gay guys need to grow the fuck up Hey, it's called being an adult everyone should be verse if you ask me I just think it's like more welcoming it feels more inclusive It's like sometimes so I'm trying to like be focused on the pod But it's like the clip is so clear to me. Yeah, it's like to your media. It just knows exactly And I think being a side obviously whatever, you know, this is all satire everything we see on here satire So of course, I think everyone to do whatever they want to do just want to put a little disclaimer on it I want to do whatever they want to do as long as you're not hurting anybody I just think the top bottom being so like locked into one thing. It's like it feels so binary. What did Katy Perry tell us? I'm not just one thing So we were talking about how like all the Romans were probably verse because they didn't have such You know societal I said that to you and you go and say that yeah We were just in the cabin. It was late. You were just talking about this. You were really like fixated on it Well, you said you were like well, what did they do in the Roman times everyone was fucking everyone? Yeah, it's it's yeah I can only assume verse and I get if you have a preference, but it's like don't you want to experience it all Yeah, try everything. What did you care say? Zootopia? Oh, this is as much action as we've done. Oh Yeah, it was cool when the paintbrushes were painting my face that felt cool So the other day I just said to Benny. I was like I'm about to party on you. Oh, no, no, no, no, wait Can I say something? Yes, I'm about to party on you. No, seriously dude look at me. I'm about to party on you Look at me like that one more time. I'm about to part you know what's gonna fucking happen. I love it It's a kind of threat though. Well, of course the sexual threat. It's always right is a threat to me I'm about to party on you know and by the way Watch me party watch me watch me party on you. There's no time when a woman is more hopeful than right before bikini wax It's an inherently hopeful act And I just hope that whoever's out there getting a bikini wax today. They've got the appointments on the books Hold your head high walking in and out is all I would say I want to dub in one part during the first thing. I just want to say that like there's actually nothing I've been asked more in my life Then what percentage of overcompensating is from your real life and are you at top or bottom and that's just Hollywood baby It's definitely Hollywood. It's very Hollywood definitely Hollywood. Well people feel like they can ask you that stuff It's interesting because yeah, it's like I don't ask sexual preferences to people. I don't know or just me I only ask if I want to have sex with you I don't really need to know anyone else's, but that's so true. That's such a good boundary. You know, I'm curious Well, what you're curious about. Yeah. Okay guys. You got to know what I just want to know what people are thinking What they're thinking about. Can you go? Who shows your range, baby? Nobody nobody like you. You're so pretty is this. I love you. I think it's the lashes I really think it's the lashes. I just know this fox like he's a bastard. The next person who goes to me I will name on the pod first and last. I'm just saying that so I was at a dinner and I spit out my drink because I got the alert And I said oh wait Mary Beth just sent something in the red pod. I saw this and I look I spit out my drink and I told the person I was with and we were laughing so fucking I'm saying your full fucking name Yeah, first and last I'm just saying it now. I'm gonna tell whoever I fraternize with next as well like just so we're clear If you ghost me. Yeah, you are getting named on the podcast And I would say like RIP or DM see it right before like you're on top of them knife to throw Yeah, and say that to them and I will have that and then you say shy steam and walk. Yeah, yeah, click it I think it should record do I put batteries? Yeah, no, we didn't I love the like the little bunny snitch But she did take down a corruption from the top. That's why and you know me on the war, what a year for me on the war. - Speaking of calling people out on things, one of my friends in London was hanging out with someone who was talking about the podcast, loving ride. And then he was like, it just sucks 'cause I heard Mary Beth Rohn is a massive bitch. Didn't know that (beep) or didn't know that I was friends with the person that he was talking to. And she was like, who did you hear that from? And he was like, oh, I heard it from someone that knows her ex-boyfriend. And she was like, Edward, they're like good friends. - Yeah, what? - And she found out who the person was. And I only met her a couple times. But I just think it's funny. Like, if you listen to the podcast, you should know that I'm not that. Also, if that's the rumor, then like I must have made it because all great women are talked about in that way. - Yeah, of course, all the greats. - A massive bitch. - What's always so funny to me sometimes to like gay guys they'll talk about like divas on set and they say all the things they did. And I'm like, oh, am I supposed to not be trying not to say mother challenge? - No, I know. - I'm seated. And by the way, when people think that about you or that if they come to me and they're like, "Does Mary Beth hate me?" I'm like, you don't know yet that she's a delicate baby Chihuahua ballerina princess. - I am. And that's the energy I'm bringing. - She's a very sweet baby doll. - But also it's like, no, probably not. There's very few people I hate. I mean, I have the list of enemies in my notes app that I'll read every single name first and last in the last season of ride. - What do you say about me? - Oh, I guess she's about you. - I guess she hadn't heard any rumors about you. - No, no, no, there's no rumors about me. - She didn't know the person that he knew. - Okay. - Yeah, I have to just say like, careful, I guess. Careful. I'm glad you could say it as this. - 'Cause I could be one. - You have no idea what I'm capable of. - I don't know if I could, I wish. - You didn't think I could do this. - Universal you. - I know that you knew that. - Yeah, exactly. I was about to say, I know I've seen the vision since the very first time I saw you, sweet baby angel princess. But yeah, I'm gonna protect and I'm gonna attack. - I'm just tired, I think. - Anything else? - Is there anything else pressing that needs to be said this week? - Well, I'm drinking a mason parier ultimate. - Oh, wait, I guess it's not saying that anymore. - You wanna talk about dinner in L.A. and then wait 'cause there's a water program and you ordered an $18 sparkling water. - Oh my God, so this happened. It was so crazy. I'm at this dinner and I'm like, yeah, could I get a sparkling water? And I think this is the moment I knew I probably shouldn't live in L.A. anymore. But, you know, I still was. But she goes, we have a water program. - Totally. - And by the way, totally. - Yeah, and I said, great. I mean, how cool is that? I've watched people try wines for years. I'd love to have, you know, you come over and splash and I smell it and chug. - So I say, of course, and I was like, if you have a wreck, like, which, you know, and she's like, what do you like? And I'm like, "Shit girl, where do we start?" - Right. - She's diverse. - Yeah. - And then so I was like, I love it really spicy. Like, I want it, you know, searing my esophagus. She brings out this water and it was, I found out later was $18. The money well spent, happy to do it. - And. - It's the tariffs. - It's the tariffs, of course. It tasted fully like the Dead Sea. It was like the saltiest. - You're fucking. - You wanted spicy? - I said, yeah, but I didn't say I wanted like sodium. It was greasy, how salty it was. - But did you drink it? - I did. I finished the whole thing because she kept coming back and asking how it was. She never asked how the food was. It just was this water. And that's what I love about LA. And so stories like this, and experiences like this, are why I think I'm a great catch and someone to watch, I think a newcomer to watch. - A one to watch. - I'm the one to watch and. - A one to watch. - It's why. - $18 water. - We have a podcast. - A podcast. - And you found. - The podcast. - So should we get into what we ride for? - Yeah, so today and our little spooktober haunted, hey, ride, I'm gonna be riding for corn mesas. - And I'm gonna be riding for screenshots. - Spooky. - We tried to watch a horror movie the other night and hour in where nothing could scare us at this point. Off and then. - Let's turn it off. - Yeah. - Hey, maybe next year. - Maybe next year. - Maybe next year. - We go, that's all you've got. And then we cut. - Show me something. Show me something. - Show me something. - Show me something. You want sex with me? - Well, then come talk to me. (laughing) - Clip that. - Wait. Europe's (beep) with us today. I wanna be looked at the way you're looking at me. - I know. - Wow. - I'm serious. - This is setting a high bar for the night. - Do you know what I mean? - Also, it's 5 PM. We never record it at this time. So we're feeling extra crazy. - Well, it's right after dark. - It's right after dark. - This is interesting with the hands out. - Yeah, but it's fine. It's like just to use your magic. - It's very random. (upbeat music) - First of all, just wanna tell everyone that we are not in the submersible for the first time in a long time. Last week, I did ads from my bed. - Someone asked if I was at a water park for one. I'm not kidding. - I've done them outside. - What I wanna talk about is bonza. It's very monica barberado. - It's very bonza makes better for you versions of comfort foods, pasta, pizza, mac and cheese, and waffles all made from chickpeas and are gluten-free. So that's like so my vibe. - Yeah, and their mission is to inspire people to eat more chickpeas, me, - And other beans. - And other beans. - And other beans, which we have to. Improving human health in the environment. So I had this crazy bonza experience where my niece was eating bonza pasta. And you know when your niece or nephews are eating something and you're like, "Well, I'm finishing that." - 100%. - And so I just, I was like, "More, another bite for drama, I'm a bonza head." - Well, let's face it. And we talked about this on the pod before. Gluten-free pasta has a problem. Right, like you've said, it's a sponge. It goes soft too soon. It falls apart under pressure and it can leave you feeling unsatisfied. - Yeah, not. - You know what I mean? And it's just like not good for the table. Bonza, you know the brand that gave us the first chickpea pasta in that gorgeous orange box. - Mm-hmm. - Oh my god. Has discovered it. - Is it an emergency? - No, it's bonza! - No, it's bonza! - Introducing bonza brown rice pasta, the first gluten-free pasta that never goes limp. It's firm when you need it to be. - Oh my god. - Oh my god. - Yeah, right. - Even after round two of cold pasta leftovers from the fridge. - It holds up in hot and steamy situations, like soup season. - Come on, curplung. - Come on, curplung! - And leaves you satisfied for days on end. - It's made with just two simple ingredients, brown rice and chickpeas, and it tastes exactly like classic pasta. So if you've been let down by gluten-free noodles before, talk to your taste buds about switching to brown rice pasta. Visit eatbanza.com and use code ride@checkout for 50% off your first purchase of pasta or mac and cheese. That's E-A-T-B-A-N-Z-A.com and use code ride for 50% off. Your first order of pasta or mac and cheese. This podcast is sponsored by Squarespace. Squarespace is the all-in-one website platform for entrepreneurs like me to stand out and succeed online. Whether you're just starting out or managing a growing brand, Squarespace makes it easy to create a beautiful website, engage with your audience and sell anything from products to content to time, all in one place, all in your terms. - So do you mind if I just, I want to say like three product features if we have time at the school? - Absolutely. - Okay, so my favorite product features, if I had to say, it would be, I think, Squarespace Payments because Squarespace Payments is the easy way-- - Well, you love money. - Of course, and so do you. Squarespace Payments is the easiest way to manage your payments in one place with Squarespace. Onboarding is fast and simple. You get started in just a few clicks and start receiving payments right away. Plus, give your customers more ways to pay with popular payment methods like Clarna, ACH Direct Debit, US, Apple Pay, Afterpay, US, CA, and Clear Pay, UK. You can also connect social and multimedia accounts. Now, I don't want to jump the gun here, but I would say if you want to check MaryBetsRohne.com in about two weeks, you might see some important information on there. Literally, I can plug in my bands in town, and I put all my shows in bands in town and they show up directly on my website. You can also use SEO tools to get discovered fast. Every Squarespace website is optimized to be indexed with meta descriptions and auto-generated site map and more. So you show up more often in global search. Go to squarespace.com for a free trial. And when you're ready to launch, squarespace.com/ride to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. Squarespace, your family dues disappointments the world. Your family, dude. By now, you've probably heard of built 'cause we talk about it all the time. You're always yapping about builds. Before you can earn points on your monthly rent payment, but did you know they make it possible for you to get more outside of your home, too? If you're paying rent every month without earning anything in return, let us introduce you to built. The rewards program designed for renters, me, who want to earn something for their largest monthly expense. Let me explain. - Well, I'll just take it away from you. - Yeah, why don't you take it 'cause my voice is kind of. - I agree. Okay, so nobody wants to pay rent, right? But if you have to, built makes it worth it. Build is revolutionizing how millions think about paying rent by rewarding their members with points and exclusive benefits around your neighborhood. - By paying rent through built, you earn flexible points that can be redeemed towards hundreds of hotels and airlines. A future rent payment, your next lift ride and more. But it doesn't stop there. Build is about making your entire neighborhood more rewarding. You can die in at your favorite local restaurants and earn additional points, get VIP treatment at certain fitness studios and enjoy exclusive experiences just for built members every month. - Build is turning a monthly expense. I'll pop in here that I'm good now. Build is turning a monthly expense into an opportunity to earn rewards and discover the best that your neighborhood has to offer. Your rent is finally working for you, CAD. Earn points on rent and around your neighborhood, wherever you call home, by going to joinbelt.com/ride. That's j-o-i-n-e-i-l-t.com/ride. That's joinbelt.com/ride. Make sure to use our URL so they know we sent you. - Right here. - Right here. - Wait, where are we going? - Who cares? - Ride. - So do you wanna go first or should I? - I would love to go first if that's okay. Just 'cause I didn't get any point. I might just like die. - Grash out, yeah. But as well, let's get this on the record before he passes away. That would be forehead to table, you know? - Well, nose really would hit first. - Oh yeah, of course. My muzzle. So here's the thing, corn mises. I grew up in Idaho, so of course I'm familiar with corn mises. - I've never done one for what it's worth. - You know, I can't see, it leans escape room, but I'm gonna tell you why it's not. And why it's more after the fun. - To me, I go, no, I'm good. - No, I get it. And I think I might-- - I don't die for them. It's just something. I wouldn't need to experience. - Well, exactly. Sometimes with a lot of fall stuff, I love like the concept of it, but then if I'm actually at a pumpkin patch, like waiting in line to like carry a pumpkin that has dirt all over it, I'm like, I didn't love this. - Well, when you have a bad sense of direction, anything can be a corn maze. - Getting from boy to boy. - Have we talked about the fact that I randomly have a good sense of direction? And it shocks people. - It's crazy. Mine, honestly, it's worse than anyone I know. I have the worst sense of direction of anyone I know. If I have a choice to go the right way or the wrong way, every single time I'm going the wrong way, sometimes even after I've been told how to get there. - Hey, that again. - Also, I don't know right from left. And I know a lot of people just gonna resonate with them because I just don't know. Can you point please? - And can we? - Don't give me the right left bullshit, okay? - Can we stop being so hard on people? - Mine is not real fast. It's all relative. - No, exactly. (laughing) You don't want to know what's going on with my mad hat or something. - Oh, sorry. I don't have time for that. I'm trying to like literally heal the world. - No, literally. - Oh, sorry. - You know laughter, you know? - Oh, so you're not busy. You know what I'm saying, right? Oh, so you're not busy. - But everyone's giving me such a hard time. I'm like, hit me. Lately, I'm just like, hit me. - 'Cause yeah, I'm literally like-- - No, your other left. I'm like, oh, I've never done such a like that to somebody your other left. Oh, okay. - Don't fart. - No, I'm not gonna. Oh, my tail came off. I was gonna show my tail. - Sit down. (laughing) - I love that you think I was gonna fart. - All right, I'm trying to sit. - Talk about it. - Just speak on it. - So corn mazes. So in Idaho, there was this place. Well, there were a bunch of corn mazes, but-- - Oh, the key in the monitor and it's just so insane. Sorry, gone. - So, no, baby. - There's a corn maze in Idaho. - Well, there's a lot. The corn maze, I. So it was kind of the thing to do in middle school. You go to the corn mazes and it's where you hold someone's hand for the first time. - Totally, totally. - And that was so cool. - That was a cool thing to do. - Well, I really loved that whole era. And I think I've talked about this. It was so cool once I started hooking up with men because I was like, oh, this is why everyone was so gagged for all this stuff. - 'Cause you're with someone that you're attracted to. - 'Cause you are like, you know, you get little butterflies. You have that bed cam, if you will. But I had a girlfriend in like seventh grade, I think, seventh or eighth. I was definitely pulling at the time. And I just remember these corn mazes. Your mom drops you off. You've got new Abercrombie jeans on. A North Face like fleece. - Totally. - You're kind of like bangs in front and you have like acne, but it hasn't really gotten to a point where it could be like debilitating. It's more kind of like a fine. - It will, but it hasn't gotten there yet. - It might even consume your life for a couple of years or 20. And then you go into this corn maze and you delicately hold the hand of a girl that reeks of a perfume. - You can't, my apple. - Yeah, no, literally. Or like daisy by Mark Jacobs, if she's filthy fucking rich. And. - Flower bomb. - Have you ever heard of Vera Wang princess? - Flower bomb. - Flower bomb. You smell like flower bomb right now. - Yeah. It was an aura. - Flower bomb. - Flower bomb. (laughing) - Oh my God. - Oh my God. - Oh my God. - Oh fuck. So that is so the fox in Zootopia. Oh fuck. - That's gonna be good and right out of context. - Yeah. - So I just loved it. It was like the, you know, and I love fall. I love a fall fest. I love the brisk, you know, little crispy weather. I love all the food. I love a funnel cake. I love an apple cider. And then sometimes people would bring like a red bowl and it was like, we're fucking getting crazy. - You're getting crunk. - Yeah. - But here's the thing about corn mace is they teach you about life. There could be something terrifying around any corner. You're probably gonna make a lot of mistakes. But at the end of the day, it's maybe not that big of a deal. - At the end of the day, you're gonna be holding hands with a woman who smells really good. - Exactly. - And you're gonna get through it together. - You're wonder I loved it so much. And I just, I've been wanting to do one recently 'cause it's just like, I don't know. It's fun and theory. And then as long as it's not too tall, I wanna be able to jump up so I can see. But, you know, seeing it in salt burn, I was like, you know, part of me wants to get back in on. - Totally was just thinking about that. - Part of me wants to get back in one. - And in Harry Potter, of course, fuck you JK. - Fuck you two. - It's literally fuck you JK. - There was sort of an iconic one in that. - Well, yeah. Definitely, there's a really common point. - What's your name, Diggory? - Cedric Diggory. - Yeah. - Glad I know that. - I'm glad you know that too. - Yeah. - Yeah. - Well, he was huge for me. I mean, - Robert Pattinson. - Yeah, Robert Pattinson. And Daniel Radcliffe and Equus. Like that was, you know, it was a good time. I was in Orlando, Blumen, Pirates, type of gal, and by that measure, a cure and nightly in Pirates. - Yeah. Women were so fixated on Orlando, he, no heat to Orlando. It's just, he never came around my, my parts. - It for me was monumental. - But I couldn't wait for him to see this. - Anyone that watched the Pirates, I think I've said this on the podcast before, but anyone who watched the second DVD in the Pirates, the Caribbean DVD pack, where it had special features in like a little documentary, thereby sexual now. - I agree with that. Kira is like corset and kind of like, takes to the chin. - So, she was so good. I do remember in Troy, there are definitely three types of people in the world. - Okay. - There's the brads, the Orlando's, and then there's the Eric Bannes. - Well, Eric Bannes and you're talking to him. - Eric Bannes and you know. - You're talking to an Eric Bannagirl. - Yeah. And that doesn't surprise me. - Really? - Yeah. I mean, think about the aesthetics. - Yeah. - There's an aesthetic there. - There is an aesthetic there. I really just, Eric Bannes was huge for me. I was so sad when he died. I was like, oh my god. He like, yeah. - Well, the character. - Yes. So, Eric Bannes is alive, by the way. - But Corn Mises, I, yeah, I just felt like it was, it was a place to meet and I haven't done one in a while, but I'm sure I would still maybe fuck with it. - I bet we could find one in Connecticut. - I think so too. And I like the scary ones. Like, I like when people jump out. I kind of love that feeling of like someone like spooking me and I kind of jump. I don't jump that much. - I'm so jumpy. And one reason I'm kind of like, I'm a little bit stoic and I like going first. I'm kind of like, no, I can do it. - Something that Edward and I used to have friction over and it was irrational on both sides was like. - Well, because you were a bitch. - Well, I mean, massive bitch. But I would be in the house with him and I would know he was there. But then when he would come in the room, I would jump and he'd be like, so it's irrational of me to jump because I know someone else in the house, like who else could it be. But then he would be like, you're so jumpy and I'm like, but that's like, I can't control that. - Yeah. - So don't get mad. Like, will you know when my shower kicked your ass? That's my favorite. - It was the picture in the bathroom. The picture, looking through this frosted glass shower and there's a photo of the back of a man's head at the same height that a man would be and I turn out, no, I literally said, hey, are we okay in there girl? Everything all right? I thought the water pressure kicked your ass. - I said, I'm good. - All good says. - Thank you. - Thank you, Deva. - But I just strongly urge, you know, go to, oh, thanks, sweetie. You're hitting it and you can't feel it because it's, I can't feel anything by the way. - I know. - But I would really strongly urge anyone who's going through a spooky time or not even go into a corn maze and lose yourself in there. - Think about life. - Left, right? Who gives a fuck? Just have a little fun dance around. - Hey, it's all Greek to me. - Get in there and lose your mind. - Yeah, crazy. - But I loved like being chased after a guy with a chainsaw and, and yeah, maybe it would electrify me and kind of bring me back to life in a way. So why not? - Maybe I'll go do that with you and hold your hand and I love being a little chilly in them and I love just, fall is so delicious to me. Not just because of my, my birthday or I just think it's the best, it's the best season. - It's horny girl autumn too. I declared that many weeks ago. So let us know how you're celebrating. - I think you're doing good. I'm excited for you. Can I just say? - That makes one of us. Look at this. I like that you're sort of using a corn maze as a metaphor. I love that. - There's going to be a lot of metaphors. - I don't want to get a narrator die yet, but. - Yeah, no, I know. I'm excited for you to talk more about that. But yeah, I guess I, I think that's all I wanted to say. I just think of good corn maize. Go back to the American tradition of the corn maize. I'm sure we stole it from someone else, but. - I'm sure we stole it. - It's American, it's me. Might be German, who knows? - And of course, Harkin's back to inner stellar corn crops. - Do you understand there's a circle. - Everything. I mean, it's the last Okra ever. Do you get that? - That would be a really good time for you to come home. - No, it would be a really good time for you to come back now. - That's what you said to me. And so I said, fine, I'll move back to New York City. - And thank you. - New York City is so good to me. That I just say. - That is my birthday. - And we are the same. - You said we might be the same age. Well, today is my birthday. And I'm going to go kiss Toe for Grace on the mouth. Blue crushes on Netflix. The scene in Blue Crush, when they're on the jet ski, and she's surfing out in the big waves. And it's, we are, we are. - The nation, we are. - I watched that scene, I could lift a car. Fabulous movie. Oh, oh, I'm so glad I got one of those. - Despite the fact that Ann Marie's mother left their family, she has a secure attachment style. She's known this guy for two days. She was a fight with her best friend. She was up to his hotel room crying, not doubting for one single second that he's going to welcome her in with open arms. - Warmer. - He supports her. He gives her a sports analogy about his first game when he got hit really hard. Tells her to, you know, get back out there on the waves. He shows up to the tournament. He's a total fucking king. - I know. - I'm like, more of that. - They got to make a more like that guy in that movie. - Please. - But I will say-- - And an NFL player who's, he steps up. - Of course. How was she going to write them? - Come on. - The best is anytime a big wave hits me. It's every now and then I wouldn't say a lot. But when they do, I can't help but just immediately romanticize it as her at the bottom. And I'm hoping that my head'll hit a rock lightly. Just I want to like concussion. But there's something about that where, oh God, that would be these huge numbers for me. And I love that her eyes are, what's it called when you have two different color eyes? - I don't know. - That could never be something we know. - It would never be something we would know. - We would never not come to dinner. - I would never not go to a corn maze. I really think if someone invited me, I'd be like, of course, I'm coming. I'm, well now it kind of goes without saying like, I'm bringing you. And I did say, I saw, was somebody sending me this thing that was on the ride reddit where it was, is like, I will say I thought something was going wrong because Benny and Mary Beth were spending time together and like almost supporting through a tough time. - Yeah, in a sort of like, we're going through the corn maze of life type of play. - Left, right? - Doesn't matter as long as I'm with you and say that. - Yeah, they're left. - Yeah. (laughing) - So I'm here to talk about Jones Road, which is from Bobby Brown. It's her brand. - The Bobby Brown. - The Bobby Brown. - They sent me this miracle bomb and it's this delicious, little tintillating, kind of runs or blush thing. - Ooh. - And oh my God, I put a little bit on my face. It looked like I went to the frickin-- - The Maldives. - I went to the Maldives. - That's so funny, say Maldives. The thing that came out of my head was Maldives. - I thought it was absolutely fabulous. I'm dying to put it on your cheek as this is. - We're gonna do that tonight before we go to dinner. - Oh great, okay, yeah, great. - Well, Jones Road Beauty is a minimalist makeup brand founded by makeup artist Bobby Brown. As you mentioned, that creates versatile and easy to use products that simplify your routine. It's clean makeup that actually performs. - Jones Road products enhance what makes you, you, rather than covering up. - That's so my vibe lately, minimal coverage. - I agree, and it's very cutesy. Like everything they have, it's that kind of like, sun-kissed, very healthy. It's like balmy, I don't know-- - Well, they're bestsellers, miracle balm. Jones Road also has a full lineup of effortless skin for staples, like they're just enough tinted moisturizer, a lightweight formula that smooths and even skin tone with a soft touch of coverage. - I feel like the package probably got there since I've been in LA and I can't wait to use this. It hides redness, looks natural, and feels like nothing on your skin, and that's all a girl wants. - Can I say something, babe? My miracle balm is your miracle balm. You don't need to worry about a package coming to the ears. - Should I do? Hacker skin friendly ingredients to keep skin moisturized without clogging pores. - I know it's not comedogenic, which like, if I hear those words, ooh, chills down my back. So, modern day makeup that's clean, strategic, and multifunctional for effortless routines. For a limited time, art listeners are getting a free, cool gloss on their first purchase when they use code Ride at Checkout. Just head to jonesroadbeauty.com and use code Ride at Checkout. After you purchase, they will ask you where you heard about them. Please support our show and tell them our show sent you. - I bet you're wondering why a company like Third Love would advertise on a podcast with two people with no boobs. And yet here we are. - Here's the thing. Third Love makes better bras, period. Founded by women who were sick of settling for bras that were good enough, yeah, fucking right. - Made with the highest quality materials to solve fit issues that many of us face. I mean, there's so many ways that a bra can like, totally fuck your shit up. Like, if it's too tight in the back, if the straps are too tight, it feels heavy, it feels tight, it's squeezing the skin. - Wait, wanna know something so insane? I was so worried. - When you buy your mammogram? - Well, that, but also I was so worried about not knowing how to do a bra thing. 'Cause in movies and stuff, it was like, "What have you never done it before?" So I took one of my sister's bras and I practiced how to do the clasp. Isn't that so sad? - I love what we've done. - With the place. - With the place. - Yeah, so. - And you know exactly what I mean by that. - You can get extra lift, you can smooth out back spillage and more with third love. - Third love. - Available in 60 plus sizes to fit double A, me, to H. - Me. - Third love does it all and stop settling for average bras. Get solutions made for your body. - Yeah, 15% off your purchase at thirdlove.com with code podcast15. - Did you know third love has 10 plus years of redefining what a comfortable bra looks and feels like? Designed with the highest quality materials, including innovative thermo regulation. And they invented half cup sizes for those who are in between sizes. - With the ammonium feyglocolate. - And a half loop top stitching on the hem. - You've got the wrong girl. - Low viscosity rayon. Seriously, stop settling for average bras. Get 15% off your first purchase at thirdlove.com with code podcast15. - Thank you, third love. - Holy shit, I love K18. - Do you ever wonder why the baronies that come up and say hi to us always have perfect hair? - K18. - It's K18. - And I love the name of it. I don't know why, it's like K18. I love the bottles. There was this K18 leaving conditioner that I used on set 'cause obviously I was frying my hair to a certain point. It's getting it done every day. And my God was it delicious. - Well, the secret to keeping your hair looking like total perfection is the K18 molecular repair hair mask women in STEM. What if you could bleach and color your hair without damage? The K18 molecular repair hair mask isn't just a damage cover up. It's a deep damage fix. - Well, do you want to know why? - Why, it's so hot. - Well, of course, sweetheart. So it's this patented K18 peptide. It actually repairs damage on the molecular level, which is really, really goddamn deep. - In just four minutes, I got stronger, smoother, softer, bouncy, or hair like new, no matter what I put it down. - I will just like dead ass, take the ad out, strip everything away from us. Your hair looks gorgeous. - Thank you. - It really looks so healthy. And you dyed it for a whole year. - And I'm going it out every day. - Daddy made you dye it for a whole year and it's gorgeous. - We put my hair through a lot. We eat together. Leach color, heat, hairspray, you name it. So I guess what I'm saying is you'd be a fool to not order K18. And you can find K18 at your local Sephora and feel the difference for yourself or try it 10% off your first purchase at k18hair.com. That's code ride at k18hair.com. Anything else to say on it, baby girl? - So for me, it's just like, there's kind of not a K18 product that I don't think is fire. And if it's in someone's shower and I'm in their house, like, yeah, I'm like, has many, as many dollops of it as I can. I think it's fabulous. And you know what? And I'll always say this. When you get your hair cut somewhere, the brands they have at the salons. - Speak volumes. - K18 is always on the shelf. - K18's been that girl and she will remain that girl. K18, we love you to death. - So screenshots. I mean, okay. - Oh, I literally just got tingles from screenshots. - Let's just take it way back to, you know, cell phones, cell phones are hitting the market. We're not even aware of the capabilities that they will have down the line, right? We're texting, we're calling. There's not that much it can do. Eventually, we're taking pictures of things outside ourselves. - Unless you had an LG MV 'cause I was doing crazy shit on that. - Well, yeah. As technology advances, as it's want to do. - Yes, we do. - We move into this technology where you simply press two buttons and you're a photographer. You can capture what's on the screen. The way that they didn't know how single women would use this feature to garner support, to propagandize, to over-analyze, to just build community. - I mean, we send each other, please send it to myself. - A thousand screenshots a day? I can't, I literally can't open an app without being like, what do you think? - Well, how could we would never not send each other a screenshot? What are you gonna do? Describe it to me? Honey, let's see it. - I want to see how it's worth it. - Show me something. - How many messages was it? I need to see punctuation. I need to see capitalization. I need to see emojis. Sorry. I'm not getting the full picture, honey. - I also stress, I need to see what time of day. - Oh, oh. - I gotta see what time of day. - 100%. Now, screenshots can be so scary when you really can sort of the fact that almost anything you send can be screenshot. Except if you're in, I guess, Snapchat and/or on Instagram, DM when it's-- - Everything's public. - But just consider this. - Yes, I can't wait for this. - Consider this when I had Raya. This was many, many years ago. And I found someone on there and I couldn't screenshot. So I opened Photobooth on my computer. I flipped the phone 321, snap. I got the picture. Now, I never really send it to anyone. It was just so I could have it, you know. Oh, so Raya, you can't screenshot either. But I'm not on that app anymore. So that's not part of my life. - That's so hard though. Like, if you were on there, I'd be like, send me everything about the guide. Like, what do I have to have your phone? - Well, yeah, I mean, what you will now that our screenshots will certainly decline now that we are gonna live in the same city. But my screenshots folder, not only just things like that, conversations. - Yeah. - It's memes, it's important moments and videos. It's things I've seen that just totally want me over. And I said, I need that forever. - Of course, what's my favorite one lately? - I don't care if it's a chat. I said, not me. - Yeah, that was a screenshot, had to have it. Let me actually look through some. Let's show some. - Yeah, I wanted to share some, but I just think like, yeah, your screenshots folder. I mean, it should be hidden. Like, I want to use Face ID to have to open it. Does that make sense? I don't think anyone that has my phone should have access to this. - Here's my thing. It's like, if you have my phone, like, let it rip. - I have a lot of screenshots of DMs, both positive and negative. - Okay, let's see what I've got. I have some merch, I'll flash it quickly. - Careful now. - Okay, okay, a lot of, yeah, I mean, it's a lot of, a lot of conversations. - It's a comment I got on one of my standup videos, Teemoo Taylor Swift. - Oh, I love that. - Teemoo Taylor Swift. - Oh, this one says, love you Benito, greetings from, it's Chile, but I thought they said, "Chao." - Oh, I have Biden's trusted messengers, when Fox News put you up. - Oh my God, that was the best. - I have a lot of images of people tagging me in photos of people that I look like, both positive and negative, and eventually I will post another dump of that. I have the meme of, I'm having a bad day, this girl's texting, and then the guy is thinking, when will this bitch have a good day? But instead, he writes, "Fack, that's wrong." - That's me. - Yeah, but also me in a lot of ways. - Oh, wait, I have this one. It's, I want to be adored by millions, perceived by none, and love touched on by one special boy. Is that so crazy? - Right. - Send that to you, obviously. - Well, of course. The screenshot of when I saw Pinkie on the grid of all the dogs they had, and she just had so much attitude, and I said, "I need that one." Oh, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. I have this Alec Baldwin tweet. Where is it? He tweeted this in, I don't know what year. Starbucks on 93rd and Broadway, uptight, clean barista named J has an attitude problem. (laughing) If that ain't you. Oh, fuck, that's so me. Oh, this is, wait, this is true. Zootopia 2 will have a much darker tone and a few characters will actually die. I have a screenshot of your text and it says, "It's amazing." You said, "Why is that mesmerizing?" I said, "It's good, right?" I don't know what that was about. And you said, "It's amazing." A completely intoxicated man just told me his parents beat him as a child and his engagement ended three days ago. And he asked me to have dinner with him tonight. So that's one thing I'll do for the day. I'm not laughing about his abuse. I'm just like that. No, that was a crazy thing that had happened to me. Yeah. He did then stalk her. So I don't really have a problem. We're not going to get into it. Yeah. But my screenshots, I have a lot of, when Yassifying was a big trend, I have a lot of my friends Yassified. Oh, vote. When everyone made the vote covers. This was, that, oh, so I love-- That was huge for the whole day. When you guys love graphic design, it's just, it makes me so proud. I mean, yeah, it just doesn't get much better than my screenshots folder. Oh, I actually have this iconic Rachel Senate Instagram story. She had questions. The question was, my girlfriend just soft-bunched me. Do I soft-bunched back or full-post? And her response is full-post. I think guys should post their girlfriend constantly or nothing at all. And girls should post photos of themselves. And then maybe on his birthday, the back of his head. But that's just me. That's perfect. I mean, not to be taught in schools. I agree. Yeah, you would be lucky to take a fucking lap around my screenshots folder. Oh, I love this one. George Clooney says, I don't give a shit if people think I only play myself on screen. Yeah. I see a screenshot of that and have to send to you. So, yeah, I guess, Sharer, you know what today, this is for the Baroney's a fun little thing. Go through your screenshots and just post your favorite one to story. So much Baroney HQ as well. Yeah. It's also just fun because it's like, you don't want to go through the rig and morale of like doing all the things or looking up the person or saving it or just like just screenshot it, dude. Screenshot it. Also, it's cool in photos. If you use the magnifying glass to search if the meme or screenshot you're looking for has a word in it, you could just look up the word and it'll come right up. Oh, cool is that. It's like Victoria Beckham saying, I have never read a book in my life. That's in my screenshot. You couldn't look up that any time. Anywhere on any any sort of browser situation. So I love screenshots and yeah, but there is this spooky side, which is that like as we screenshot, they can too. Yeah, so equal opportunity. Yeah. And I think screenshots should be used for good and not evil. I agree. I'm not sure if you're putting a point which I think is good. Or unless you're in the right, I guess. Again, good. I need that to record for you in the writers room. Yeah, totally. So yeah, I think like screenshot early and often have fun with it, share it with your friends. And yeah, there's just like, it's just a fun thing for girls to do. Guys shouldn't screenshot, I don't think. No, I don't know what the purpose would be at that. Well, you're not thinking about that anything. I don't think they are. Like, I don't think guys are screenshotting. I really don't. I think they don't care about anything. No, I'm really finding that too. I'm like, wait, give me your phone. And actually, we were with the straight guy recently. And I saw he was like, don't swipe on my phone. And I just, it was just kind of like memes and said, like, there was nothing. They are screenshotting memes. I do believe things that make them mine. Straight guys are social anxiety. I'm like, maybe you should have sex, blow off some steam. I don't want to get in the way. I just wanted that clean. So I don't want to say anything. I just wanted that line clean. That was perfect. I just, I can only amplify. I agree. I don't know why you're so tense, baby. What? You need to have sex. Yeah. What are there? So I guess let's get into writer time. As I said, like, sex with us is imminent at this point. If you want to have sex with me. Come talk to me. Come podcast with me. (laughing) I was having all my crushes on his guest. We have to go. Oh, totally. You know what you are, Vinnie? A ****. Your words not mine. Babe, you're my writer, die. Ride or die? I of course ride for screenshots. I see. Ride. You think you're worthy for the hours of the night. It's like, I don't like fun. You work for the big screenshot. I do work for big screenshot. I work for big screenshot. I love it. I have to send Mary Beth so many a day. She has to check all my work. It's just important. I don't know what to tell you. But also, I shouldn't be giving advice to anyone. I want to be on the record saying that I. I should. I should not be. I think I should. It's tough. I'm like, why is my life where it's at? (laughing) Oh, look at you. Wait, no, put them down back the other way because it's so cute. It looks like, oh my god. Look at her. Get this quiet. I'm not going to say what I'm doing here. You're going to have to just watch the like, isn't that crazy? I don't know. For easy, I have my support and none of my judgment. So here's the thing. Yeah, I ride from. Yeah, I might do them too much. And yeah, when you send me stuff, Mary Beth's probably seeing it. But she also looks at it. No, no. I'm definitely seeing it. Yeah, you're seeing it 100%. Meanwhile, everything you send, Benny, I'm seeing. I don't show you everything. Because I want to save you from disappointment. And I do think people are just out here. They're just fumbling. They don't disappoint me as much. Yeah, I don't want people to disappoint you. I had to keep a big secret from you before they're overcomposing from you. And I did. And I told you after, 'cause I knew if I told you before, you'd get upset. Wait, I don't even know what it was. I'll tell you later, I'll remind you. Yeah, I don't even see it. Just say it. But yeah, I just rolled off right off your back. I just live in little Benny world. I just wish to like, I don't know. I have some stuff I need to figure out. Well, I've been doing talk therapy lately and it's been amazing. This ear look is so kind. Yeah, no, I know. I mean, I look cute. I'm telling you, it's getting to that time. Is it a crime to be gorgeous? (laughing) Wait, what is it? They gon' come here, man, when we hit the, it's the crime to be gorgeous. (singing) It's a crime to be gorgeous. Oh, I have to say one thing about that was so funny. Last night, Mary Beth and I were out getting drinks if you didn't pick tonight. Oh, and by the way, I'm 25 again. I'm doing all the same shit I did when I was 25. I never ever thought I would be back here. Me too, and I-- Can I just say one thing? I'm having a lot of fun. You didn't think you'd be back here? I didn't think I'd be back here. And here I am, and I'm literally like moving my hips, and then I'm having fun. I looked at the clock last night. It's like, who I am. I'm having Instagram stories, you guys, because we have fun with them. And I do think that people lose sight of the fact that Instagram stories should be fun. And we're just having fun. I hope you're screenshotting them and sending them to people and saying, "Oh, my God, this is so funny." Well, it's funny. I could be more private, but why? It's just so funny, I'm out with my girl. I'm like, she put blush on, I'm like, God. So what happened last night, that was funny? Well, it was so funny, 'cause at one point, I looked for my phone, I was like, "Where is it?" And Mary Beth just fully was going through all my stuff. You just had it, and it was as if it was your phone, and I was so-- Radical transparency. I know, but it was fun to see my phone with it. It's like-- - Do someone else's eyes? - It's auntie. It just got to spend the day with you, and just like you just reviewed everything. You saw everything. - And I'm finding out stuff you probably didn't think I ever would. - Really? - Universal you. Well, my friends fucking my exes. And then sometimes I'll just see people's phones or they'll tell me things. And I'm just like, well, that's probably something that person didn't think I would ever hear. (laughing) And yet, here we are. And I'm here, and I'm your wife, and I'm sexual. - I'm sexual. - I love you for some reason. I have fallen in love with you during this episode more than I ever, yeah. - So? - I will say though, all you fucking targets are trying so hard to be Mary Beth's gay guy. But what you don't understand is that she loves money, and I'm bringing her jobs. - That's what it's like. - So until you can fucking play ball in the way that I am, step down. Look for a new woman. I have a lot of time on my hands now. And you're a local. - I'm a local. - I'm a local hire. Do you get that? - Yes. - Do you get that baby? - Yes. - I ride for corn maces. I think they speak volumes. - These lashes on you. - I can't wait to, it's like grace. It's very grace-coded. I can't wait to walk through. I mean, we are walking through this crazy little corn maze called Life Together. - Wanted. - And when there's one set of footprints, it's 'cause you carried me or I carried you. We're flipping and sometimes we swap. - Reverse. And yeah, I've not done one, but I would. I totally would with you. I probably, and maybe someone I wanted to hook up with, I'm not sure. I don't know. I don't know if I'll ever be attracted to anyone ever again. That's something I'm really bumping up against these days. - Yeah, you did say that to me. - I just don't think there's someone out there for me. And I'm not, I'm in the acceptance phase of just like, yeah, maybe there's not. - Oh, well, I can't fathom introducing someone to my family. - I know or me. Could you-- - No. - Taking-- - No. - Me betting on a straight guy to the point where I bring him to you is just, it's not gonna happen. - I'm always here and I'm right. - And I know that I'm bisexual. And obviously I'm saying yes to life. And I am going out on dates with men. I'm going out on dates with women. I feel worse hurting women's feelings. So sometimes it makes more sense to just not go on the date. - Okay. - Because I don't want to hurt a woman. - Hey, can I just say-- - It's a guy like whatever. - Can I just say so? - Yeah, yeah. So I don't want people coming for me. I've been dating men for 20 years. So I have a little more practice. - Judy Hopps. I've been sucking and fucking men for 20 years. - I've been sucking and fucking for 20 years. - No, no, I haven't been sucking and fucking fucking. - I haven't been sucking and fucking being that long. - It's 18. - I love corn mazes. Happy Halloween, everyone. We're not doing as much this year as we have in the past. And I just want to set the stage for people right now. - This feels like a lot. - This is the costume. - Come on. - You're doing one other one. I might be-- - I might be-- - I haven't decided. - Can't wait. Yeah, that's gonna hurt. Ooh. But unlike you tucking, I'm gonna put some cotton. And that's, that's right. - Try everything, guys. - Try everything. We're both single and we are-- - Yeah, we'll see. I mean, yeah, yeah, we'll see. It's great. - I'm taking the costume off. - Yeah. Wait. They gotta see this. This is their reality. - Imagine me at your apartment. - As you don't see. Wait, wait. Yeah. - Maybe Tori's secret push up, huh? It's getting stuck. This bra is like, isn't a cup. It's so big for me. I said that Geneva convention. - And I say, well, what do you think of that? - And I go like this. - No, we need to put oil on first. - And they go, "You were a human this whole time?" - I can't believe you did that. I cannot believe-- - And they go, "You've been queer as folks, many drama." - It's brown or on your mouth. - We have to, okay, that's it. Thank you guys. - Thanks you guys, happy Halloween. - Oh, my accent. - "Anything, but I's on my own." - There you go. - Bye, bye.