harpers Ex BF Sent Her a Love Letter!

How do you want to split it? Actually, dinner's on me. Okay, big money. Well, I got a Venmo balance that I can spend with my Venmo Debit MasterCard, so. Well, I Venmo'd you three times last week, so it's kind of on me, actually. Yeah, you send it, I spend it. Did my money get, like, reincarnated? Yeah, it's chicken shawarma. Want it back? I can't believe you, like, ate my Venmo. Spend your balance instantly with the Venmo Debit Card. No monthly fee or minimum balance. Venmo balance account required to get a card and use a balance. This Venmo MasterCard is issued by the Bancorp Bank, N.A. Harper, has any guys wrote you a letter? Yeah. What them letters say? To Harper. Thank you for being a special person in my life. You brighten my day, Harper. You mean a lot to me. You're very pretty and sweet, Harper. I love your smile and how perfect you are, Harper. He says Harper a lot. Harper wanted to expose someone, so I'm exposing her. Hello, this is Jordan. Good evening, Jordan. This is your principal. Can I speak to a parent or guardian? Phone call. Just one second, Jordan. Pip-Pip Cheerios. Sorry, she just said one second. Hey, guys. So, I have something big to tell y'all. My leg may be getting amputated just because. Oh, my gosh. No, no, no, no. Monkey, you'll be able to collect disability. No, look. I got. Oh, no. Is that an ingrown hair? Gosh, no. I shaved perfectly. Can we get a close-up on that? Yeah, it is. What is it? Terrible. It's an ant bite, she said. I mean, that's, like, crazy right now. I know. I know. So. What are we looking at? It's not just a bump. Like, your actual leg around it is swollen. What? From here, it looks like that. Yes, that's the truth. It's a raise. Doesn't it? Look. On the inside of her thigh, it looks like swollen. Yeah. It kind of looks like mountains. You did something. You, like, suctioned your leg with something. No. To make it look worse. So, what'd you do? What is that? So, I was at Senior Cheer Photos yesterday, because I'm a senior. And a cheerleader. And. Right. A model. I'm joking. Hey, those outfits y'all are wearing, are those your cheer uniforms? Yeah. They look like little cowgirl outfits. They look like cowgirl. I know. I know. But they're cute, and I'm excited, but. It fits. You're in Texas. Those are our performance outfits. Oh, okay. That's not what you're going to wear to the football game. Hey, so how'd you get the bumps? Oh, you are. Yeah. Oh, okay. So, we were taking the photos, and I get into my car. I look down. There is an ant on my leg. And the ant is doing this little thing with his mouth. And I can see it. I can see it doing that. So, I look down, and I see the ant doing that. So, I wipe it off my leg. The ant wipes to this side of my leg. An ant bites that side. It was an angry ant. So, I squish it, and I'm like, okay, whatever. I'd be mad if I got squished. You didn't try to pop it, did you? I'd be mad if I literally got bitten. It bit you twice? It bit me twice. Ant, no way. And now there is holes in my legs. Holes. Did you try to pop it? I used to do that when I ate eight bites, because they look like pimples. You're not supposed to do that. Why? It makes it way worse. Why? Because then it starts bugging you. Yeah, and then you can get an infection, because it's like an open wound. Wait. That was a funny one, man. Really? You're not supposed to pop it. I like that one better than the first one. Because I've been trying to pop it. Yeah, no, no. Stop, stop. It makes it worse, Harper. I think you got it. Pop it. You know, when you have a pimple in your face, and it's not ready to pop, and you pop it, and then you have a scar, it's going to do that. Don't do it. Dude, this week, I was actually so, like. Like, Cash was just looking down on my nails, and I know in your brain, you're like, dang, those are ugly. Yeah, I thought that. Wait, actually? No. They do be long, though. No, you want to know, fun fact, also, our TV, we accidentally smashed our TV a couple days ago, again, and this one's broken. It is? I see that. It's, like, leaning backwards. Oh, no, not because it's leaning backwards. If you guys watch it, if you just watch as the episode goes on, it'll just randomly go dark, and it comes back alive. Wow. Yeah, but anyways. Did y'all go to the nail salon together? No. Y'all's nails are, like, almost the same. No, we didn't. We don't do it. Fun fact, guys, do you guys, do girls know this, but that guys do not care about nails at all? It's not about you. Yeah, it really isn't. I enjoy getting my nails done. Wait, you always say that you get them done for me. Yeah. Wait, then why do you, then why when you guys come home, like, Kate, every time you get your nails done, you come on, and you're like, hmm? What do you think? To show you, because I'm proud. What do you think? Yeah. They make me happy. Then why do you always ask me what I think? I like to be put together. Because I want to know what you think, and if you don't like them, I'm like, that sucks. Yeah. But then if I don't say anything, you're like, oh, you don't like them? Yeah, they're not for you, though. They're for me. But then why do you always want my validation when you get them done? Because I don't want you to think they're ugly. Oh. Or if you jack up my car. But they're still for me. If I didn't like getting my nails done, I wouldn't go get my nails done. Yo, I was actually semi-proud of Kate this week. Look, I just did it. Yeah, it goes dark and come back. Wait, what were you proud of? Yeah, I was kind of proud of Kate this week because, well, this part's kind of embarrassing, but she was opening a container in the kitchen to get to her spices, and she accidentally, it's like a wood top. And she got a splinter in her thumb. But it was not just a splinter. I am not joking. It was about one to two inches long. It was long. It was about this. Do you have photos? No. From a spice bottle? No, no, no. The butter canister. You know how the butter, our butter container is like a bamboo top? I was wiping, I was cleaning, so I was wiping it down. And I wiped, and because it's bamboo, there's a little piece of wood that was poking, and it went straight into my thumb. Yeah. And I'm not kidding. It was like one to two inches long of bamboo like this. It was long. And it went straight inside her thumb, just all the way down. That's like a form of torture. It was torture. Yeah. It was bad. Did you pull it out? No. We got needle, or tweezers, and I was trying to get it out of her thumb. But the weirdest thing is it was just under the top layer of my finger, so you could see the entire- Under your nail? What? Oh, it's on my finger. You can see- She said under the top layer of her finger. No, the top layer of my finger. Just your skin. The pad. Oh. Hey guys, I know I am interrupting the podcast right now, but this is not an ad, okay? Do not skip this. This is not an ad. This is for people who like making fan accounts, fan clips, edits, things like that. We are going to be doing- We are going to be doing competitions with you guys, so text this number and text LOL to this number if you guys want to enter these competitions. We're giving away hundreds, and I'm not even kidding, thousands of gift cards to places like Target, Sephora, Starbucks, places like those. Okay, big money. Want it back? The Venmo MasterCard is issued by the Bancorp Bank N.A. This episode is brought to you by Starbucks. That is fire. Whoa, that's good. This might be the drink of the summer. Okay, I like this one, too. I'm rocking with it, okay. Try it for yourself. Starbucks Refreshers Concentrates are coming home. Find them in the coffee aisle. And make it yours. So, text this number if you guys want to be entered in any of these competitions. And these are going to be, like, every single week. So, we're giving away, literally, I'm not kidding, guys, thousands of these gift cards. And all you guys have to do is make fan edits, fan clips, montages, and post them to places like TikTok, YouTube Shorts, Instagram Shorts, places like that. So, text this number if you want to be a part of that. So, the top layer of skin, you could see just the entire thing. You can see the scrapbook. You can see the entire splinter in my thumb. And, yeah, it was right here. But, anyways, a little bit of it's sticking out. So, I tried to get. Harper, what are you doing? I'm cleaning off my phone. What the frick are you doing right now? No. No. We were telling a story. What are you doing? Is that a cotton ball? Yeah. Where did you get that from? My bag. Put it back in your bag now. Okay, anyways, why Harper cleans her phone. Put it in the bag. Your gums are bleeding. You're disgusting. You're disgusting. He doesn't floss much. Also, you do have a pimple on your thigh. And you have the new Spider-Man gene. You got bit by your ant woman. Dude, I have a. Wait, is that a thing? Ant woman? No. No. Just ant man. Why are you disgusted in me today? I'm not. Maybe it's because you just used a tampon to clean your phone. Oh, is that what that is? Well, unfortunately, it's the only thing in my purse that I have to clean my phone because all my keys are jacked. You couldn't wait until, like, later on to clean your phone? No, I can't even press it down anymore. Oh. Okay, anyways. Anyways, guys, I was telling a story, right? The splinter was in her thumb. She just pulled a tampon out to clean her phone. Why are you moving on? I'm aware. The splinter was all the way in her thumb. And I get tweezers to. It's not used, and I. Like, I'm so confused. I like this. How does it feel, Cash? That was the most, like, little boy thing ever. And there is quite literally a bug on here. There is a bug over here. It's a flea. I swear that was a flea. It's a gnat, Harper. It's a fruit gnat. Yeah, so I had these tweezers in. I was trying to get it out of my thumb. Dude, Mav's got fleas. No one cares about your splinter story. No, no, no. It was kind of crazy. Wait, it gets crazy. And then I try to get it out, and I break the part off that's sticking out. So then she has, like, an inch or two of just splinter in her. And I was. Splinter in her. I was like, there's only one way to get this out. It was a splinter in her. A knife. So I went and got a whole pocket knife, and I had to slice open her thumb like this to get it out. That's how we always got splinters out. That's a fake story. You didn't do that? No, it's not. Let's see the finger. Because this was two days ago. And I put the knife under her skin, and then I had to go. And, like, cut the skin like this. Did she cry? No, that's what I was saying. She was kind of crazy. Oh, dang. That's the hole. Ooh. Yeah. You know that actually used to be a form of torture? What? Putting splinters in people? I'm pretty sure in, like, World War II or. Oh, bamboo up the fingernails? Vietnam War or something, they put bamboo up the prisoner's fingernails to try to get them to talk. Which is, like, absolutely horrifying. Well, on Saturday, my sister and I were out shopping, and we walk into Aloe, and Harper runs up to me, because Harper was there, too, apparently. And Harper, the first thing she says is, I just saw Ash Trevino. I did! Who was that? You don't know Ash Trevino? No, that should be the. title of this episode we ran into astrovino because we did and so is that uh i don't know if i describe her then things will be clipped out of the episode yeah anyways no she's just like this creator on social media who's very very controversial she's like in her 30s maybe 40s i actually don't know how old she is but she's viral because she's crazy and like she thinks she's like this a-list celebrity like super famous and everyone's like you ain't like what does she do to make like what are her videos about doing that i'll tell you this is what google says about her she is a highly polarizing texas-based social media influencer blah blah blah blah blah wait it could have been her i didn't know she's from texas yes she is best known santos she is best known for chronicling whatever that means her candid lifestyle internet feuds and relationships with incarcerated men yeah she you she sounds fun she also no she has like two teenage daughters and like she'll be doing live oh my gosh and like the way she talks to them and stuff she's on this is google this is not my words i've never seen or met astrovino often referred to as an inmate hopper inmate hopper wait if she's in texas i actually don't think we'd want her on because i think i'm pretty sure she's where did you see her i would love her on an aloe she was an aloe because apparently she's like she's thinking she always flexes how rich she is and everyone she's a rich store yeah it's expensive what did you get from ala i didn't get anything i went you saw her too no i right when i walked in i ran into harper and the first thing harper said is dude we just saw astrovino in here you didn't ask for a picture no she took a picture of her from afar oh wait let's see oh you're doing that exact thing that you think fans are weird for i know i know no but it wasn't me that took the photo it was blake blake literally pulled out his phone and started doing i was like wait that's a little do it anyways yeah um let me find the photo nope i wanted to get these pair of shorts from aloe but they were like 80 and i was like i can't do that i just can't yeah it's kind of let's see this picture yeah see if cash recognizes her imagine i'm like oh astrovino one of my friends used to date her she she has gotten in like controversy with stuff because she was like word on the street she's messing around with a kid that was a little bit too young and just like just like things like was he in jail it's not good no it was like a social media kid well that one wasn't in jail i guess probably yeah but does it do you have the picture no i can't for some reason that's the issue let me see okay well if she finds that picture i saw tiktok of ben aslart and he said he was filming a youtube video at an airport for a private jet video yeah and he said another private jet pulled up and they got out and the kids ran over to him and wanted a picture with him yeah and he said the mom was talking to him wait this is funny and he said the mom was talking to him and the mom like asked for a picture with him too and all that and he was like oh what nice to meet you guys like blah blah i just thought it was like some rich family that wanted pictures with him and then he was like oh yeah like what's what's your name and she was like shakira he didn't know who shakira was it was ben to be fair wait you're telling me that's not a stage name no no i'm telling you if cash if some if shakira walked up to cash like that cash would not recognize no idea you wouldn't know who shakira i say that all the time all famous people i'm not kidding i could be standing next to anyone at like anywhere and not know who they are bts would have no idea who they are shakira no idea who they are madonna no idea who she is how do you want to split it actually dinner's on me okay big money well i got a venmo balance that i can spend with my venmo debit mastercard so well i've been with you three times last week so it's kind of on me actually yeah you send it i spend it did my money get like reincarnated yeah it's chicken sure you want it back i can't believe you like ate my venmo spend your balance instantly with the venmo debit card no monthly fee or minimum balance venmo balance account required to get a card and use a balance the venmo mastercard is issued by the bank or bank na yeah you recognize some of the ones that you that you're like you know it's like you know their name you know their music you know they're iconic but like you don't know their face yeah that's probably what he was like he's like yeah but shakira's face is iconic shakira not really i watched her at the world cup show and i was like i'll be honest i don't know if i recognize the rock okay that's too bad you went too far yeah and what's your name oh shakira wait were you in the store were you in the store when al shabino was in there uh no she was gone by that point i was like where is she and you were like she just left well this this is a photo of her from behind but oh my gosh i mean that is the most creepy fan picture it's her it's her i i swear it's her that's actually crazy where was this at southlake yeah that might be her is shakira the only person with the name shakira that's what i was gonna say if someone told me their name shakira i think i'm automatically gonna be like so you're shakira the shakira well then you're at just like a private airport i went to school with a girl named shakira that's crazy we should name our kid shakira why why are you looking at cash and kate are you're gonna have a kid with them no you did you were like we should name our kid shakira yeah we should do you do any of y'all have like a toothpick or anything like i have this um do you want this no what do you what were you needing no what were you needing it works are you offering your pinky nail yeah look for her describe why you need a toothpick and then i might can help you i need a toothpick or i need a fine line uh pointy perhaps to fit in between the crevices on my phone so i can you're trying to deep clean your phone no it's not that i cannot press buttons on my phone let me see that don't touch my phone let me see i want to know excuse me i want to know what was on your keychain when you gave it to blake and was like there's stuff on that oh it was um last night i ow cash you're being annoying sorry hey yeah i felt like astrovino anyways don't make me break it you can't break it it's literally breaking right now literally breaking right now it's solid steel and i can quite literally break it this is made out of titanium uh-oh i think she broke it oh man it doesn't clip anymore yeah she just broke it yeah you said you said i can't break it because it's made of steel but it's actually made of plastic in the middle oh man i'm back okay well what was i saying okay what was i saying uh you're talking about i forgot cleaning your phone not being on press wait are y'all not impressed by this thing look cash we're so nobody cares like why why are you so intrigued with the but you can break it and then look yeah you know why it's so it can fold up for storage i told you it was unbreakable all right sorry go ahead bruh so uh what were you saying what was on your keys oh yeah so last night i put um my lip gloss in my bag and um exploded no i forgot to put the cap on the lip gloss oh and so then all the lip gloss got over my keys yeah and then blake didn't know what it was so it was just a sticky substance you know is blake your best friend yeah i feel like i haven't seen you without blake like literally he's like you guys are each other's shadow i haven't seen you guys without each other in like six weeks yeah yeah me and blake don't separate unless we have to go to bed it's okay derkins he's not your best friend dang they're like my sisters wow there is a difference yeah you know what i saw and i don't know if it's true but you guys have probably already seen this because you guys are kind of nerdy but i saw a clip of mr beast he got married this week by the way or he just posted his pictures why is that a nerdy thing to know no not that i'm not talking about his wedding lucky girl that's freaked up it was so cute his wedding pictures were so cute he said i found my mrs beast i was like oh you guys you guys think he made her sign a prenup yeah no no i don't think he did i don't think so what's yeah 100 i mean that prenup was long can he i need his he just needs to tell us a prenup for you guys that don't know is uh when you get married you sign and pretty much say hey even if we get divorced you can't take half my stuff yeah and i had really really rich people wait what's mr beast's last name jimmy jimmy donaldson see i told you nerdy that's crazy i didn't how is that nerdy by knowing someone's name y'all know it he's mr beast mr but he's i saw him on a clip of a podcast and he was like talking about beast game season three dang it it happens every single day i've got a bug in my coffee that does happen to you every single day every day what the heck why are there bugs all over this place i know i put a little i'm sorry what was i was being nice don't worry it's fixable okay i was saying i'm sorry she interrupted you kate ew uh don't touch her with that what were you saying for beast game season three he said the finale was i can't look at her please you're making me uncomfortable it's all right kate he's reminding me of the person from um what's it called um the nightmare before christmas that like weird robot looking thing and i feel like he would have that arm oh yeah wait don't do it like that stop okay you're interrupting the entire episode you're making everybody uncomfortable listen there's been like multiple stories that could have been really good and told well yeah people just keep interrupting yeah i wish people would stop doing that i think ivy has rubbed off on cash no verbal interruption is inappropriate however however that's all you do doing things like this a physical nuisance physicalness why someone's telling a story is not rude so tell your story look i can't it's a distraction to me oh my gosh all right fine well he said that for season three beast games the finale was a filmed inside the coliseum really what he said that he said how can you He said it's the first, like. You watched Joe Rogan? Did he say fight? Did he say it was the first fight? No, but first, like, game. First game that's ever happened in the last thousand years in the Coliseum. Yeah, the first game in the Coliseum. Did he go on Joe Rogan's podcast? Little does he know. Me and Kinsey played a game when we were there. I need a piece of the Coliseum! That's it! I'm writing that down! No, stop. Cash has been trying to make a list. What? That's one of those things that the government will kill you for. What? No. Wait, wait, yeah, can I talk about what I'm doing? Yes. No! No, it's illegal! It is highly legal. Okay, big money. Well, I got a Venmo balance that I can spend with my Venmo debit MasterCard, so. Well, I Venmo'd you three times last week, so it's kinda on me, actually. Want it back? A Venmo MasterCard is issued by the Bancorp Bank N.A. But they can't catch me once I'm gone! No, they have no proof or evidence you did anything. No evidence! This could all be a lie. Okay, I have a very. No, no, no! Very hypothetical. No, you shouldn't, you shouldn't. Okay, I have a friend that is doing something crazy. No! Yeah, a crazy friend. Fine, you know what, I don't care, he's not my husband. Okay, you know what, no, I won't say where I took. You're overly loud. You're really loud. I won't say where I took. I won't say where I took these things from, but I took them. And just, I'll use places, etc. Example. So, for etc., I stole. No, but I. Have you seen, have you seen. No, not stole, I. It's almost like Despicable Me over there, like Groot. I borrowed. I stole. I borrowed from the Great Wall of China. No, I. When I go to historical landmarks and things, do not do this. I'm taking samples. For a test of mine. So, for example, if. The cameraman is shaking his head. He said you're stupid. If I went to. Can you listen to me just for one second? No, you listen to me. Everyone, it's about time you listen. I'm being serious. I'm not saying anything. The two places you have taken stuff from, I will say, are sensitive topics. No, I'm not saying anything. Okay. Everybody calm down. All I'm saying is, like, if I go to the Pyramids of Giza, I'll take some sand. Right, not a stone. You wouldn't take a rock. I would like a big one. Make it kick rocks. You can't have that. But I'm just taking little samples of places I go. Yeah. Coliseum. Maybe the gift shop sells something nice I can take. Sure. The gift shop. Ow! Hey, I want you to know, I tried to get a rock for you at the Coliseum. You went. Oh, yeah! Yeah, I tried to get a rock for you. I wiggled on a few pieces. Does anybody have a tooth pick? That thing's solid. Look, I have a note to my app called Cash's Collection. Coliseum. You and Kate are going to go to Italy? Well, I have to now. So. Machu Picchu, Great Pyramids of Giza, Great Wall of China. Do you have, like, a sharp object? To what? So I can clean out my phone. Would you like a tooth pick? I'm really worried about that. I'll get you a pick of some sort. Thank you so much. No, no, not right now. No, no, no. We're good. No, I do need a pick. No, she doesn't need a pick. We're shooting an episode. She doesn't need to clean her phone. It's bad. What? Are you taking your SIM card out? I was thinking about. Or I was. Sometimes, like, I re-watch the podcast episodes, and I re-watch, like, the club videos when I was younger, because I like to see, like, how, like, small I used to be and, like, how young and how I talked and stuff. And I feel like I still. Like, see, that wasn't even. That wasn't even long. That took two seconds. Thank you so much. You're welcome. And what were you saying? So I, like, re-watch things sometimes, and it's just so sad to go back and look at it, because it's, like, now I'm a senior, and it's, like, wow. Where did the time go? And it's, like, I was so awkward. I was, like, hi, guys. You were never awkward. Yes, I was. No. What percentage of the episodes of the podcast. What podcast do you think you watch? Go back and, like, actually watch. I'd say 65. Really? Yeah. I watch around. I just. I can't watch anything. Why? I do not like watching your stuff, but. I love watching it. I don't. Why not? I crank that. Because it's, like, weird when, like, we're filming and doing things. Like, I'm, like, stressed out. My blood pressure just feels high. Kate wasn't meant to be an influencer. I don't think I was. What? I really don't think I was. I was. I was. But then, like. But she's trucking. She's trying to keep up. But then, like, when I'm laying in bed and I'm trying to relax, and then I just hear the LOL podcast, and she's like, all right, guys, today I'm going to be fucking stealing it. And it's just like, oh, something bad's happening again. That's just. It just spikes the scene. It's because we gave Kate PTSD in real life. Yeah. She's not built for these high-stress situations. Yeah, like the holes in the wall. What does that. Spiked your cortisol or whatever? Yeah. What does that mean? Just, like, cortisol is your stress hormone. I think it's because her family is very quiet. No. Kate's built to be an influencer. An influencer. Just not a stressed one. Yeah. Yeah. Like a book talker. Everyone else. Everyone here is, like, so nonchalant. Like, if something goes wrong, like, no one cares. If things break, no one cares. Nobody cares. If things are messy, nobody cares. Whoa. But, like, I don't. I just, like, I don't. It stresses me out when there's, like, clutter and mess and destructiveness, and it's just, like, I can't live peacefully. I care. How can we help you live more peacefully, Kate? I think we should stop doing whatever that is. See, that's the type of stuff she doesn't like. Nobody likes that. You were poking me in the eye. I was just doing that for Etcetera. Etcetera. Have you seen the movie Split? Yes. Don't do that. Split Person. Oh, yeah! Wait, is that where the guy's happy, and he's, like, he's got two personalities? He's, like, 17. He has, like, multiple personalities. Yes, yes, yes. But in one of his personalities, he always ends his sentence by saying, Etcetera, no matter what it is. Etcetera. Wait, really? Yeah. You've seen that movie? Yeah. You know what I'm saying, Etcetera. That was the only scary movie I've ever seen in theaters. Wow. I would like a burger with cheese, Etcetera. Etcetera. All you know what Etcetera really means. All I know is it means, like, for example. I want to go to the movies. We should go to the movies. Okay, Etcetera does not mean for example. No, it does not. Etcetera. For example? Wait, no. Wait, wait. I don't know. Wait, everybody time out. Ah, don't tell me. Don't tell me. I know what it means. Etcetera means, like. And more. Wait. Who here can spell Etcetera? E-C-T. No. Yes, Cash. Actually, good job. E-C. No. Oh. E-X-C. That's a hard word. C-E-R-A. No. Wait, you know how to spell it? Yeah. Ah, spell it then. E-X-C. Smart girl. No. Oh, now she's telling you no. E-X. I don't think it's an X. I'm pretty sure it is. Does anybody here know? I think it's E-C-C-E-C-E-T-T-E-R-A. Uh-uh. You want to know? It's spelled E-T space. It's spelled E-T-C-E-T-E-R-A. It is a Latin word that we abbreviate to E-T-C. I told you. E-T-C, then what? That's it. We just abbreviate it. Oh, what is it? How do you spell the word? Etcetera. The word is E-T space S-E-T-E-R-A. I refuse to believe that. Yeah, it's a Latin word. I told you guys it's E-T-C. Like a Spanish word that we just abbreviated. I told you that from the very beginning. I don't believe that. And can anybody actually explain it? I just don't believe it. Spelling's whatever. No, no, no. How do you just not believe it? Well, it's real. Stop. I don't like it, though. Come on, grab it. You're being a real nuisance today. Come on. Wait. Hey, is that yours? Can I try something? Can I try something? Yeah, that's fine. Can I try something? Wait, let me see this. You and Kate have the same one. Oh, okay, got it. Thank you. Really? Yeah. You know- Hey, hey. I bet it's fixable. I bought Kate- No, no, it's okay. It's okay. I know. It's fixable. Stop. Stop. I bought Kate several birthday gifts this year. That was so sweet of you. You didn't have to do all that. And had to return all of them. Oh. Yeah, she was really upset with you. And one of them was that cup. Oh, yeah, with you. Really? I bought you that cup because we had gone into Target like six different times, and every single time you're like, I want this cup, I want this cup. So I bought it for you for your birthday, and then two days before your birthday, you bought it. And I was like, what the frick, Kate? Yeah, she said everything that you want- You just buy. She'll be like, okay, Kate's mentioned this. I will go get this. And then two weeks later, you'll be like, I think I've waited long enough. It's fixed. And you buy it. Yeah, I do. I do do that. Well, I do this thing where I'm like, oh, I want that, and I don't buy it. But if I think about it long enough, I'm like, okay, I can go get it. I've had this phone for so long. But do you think you ever just tell yourself no for good? I think for you, Kate, in the future, a month before your birthday, you should not buy yourself anything. See- Stop. But then I'm going to- That's not fun. It's fun for everyone else, because then they can actually get you a birthday gift. I love birthdays. My friend's birthday is tomorrow. I love my birthdays. Because you're selfish. Other people's birthdays are- For my birthday, I'm going to, instead of, I'm going to ask for a bunch of money, but with that bunch of money, I'm going to give to other people. Really? That's so sweet. You can give it to me for my birthday. No, I'm going to get- It's like double it and pass it on. I'm going to give to people in need. I'm in need of your money. Wait, imagine I say that, and I don't do that. It's either going to be for Christmas or my birthday. You kind of have to do it now. It's going to be for Christmas or my birthday, so I don't know what one, but- Your birthday's like a year away. Okay, you kind of have to give it to me now, since you said it online. Just probably just give it to me now. No, for people in need. You're not in need. You don't have to post every good deed you do on the internet. The only thing in need you're in need of is some therapy to fix whatever's going on. What? Everyone's in need of something. Nah, he needs medication. Yeah. If I take medication- Wait, do you take medication? He takes 13. What would I need medication for? I think he takes stupid pills in the morning. Wait, what would I need medication for? I wonder sometimes if you have a disability going on with you. I have a lot of abilities that it will take me to do. See, that's the thing. No normal person says that. No normal person is okay to be like- Oh, no, no. He just isn't under- doesn't understand the english language i understand it fine yeah he's illiterate no i'm not illiterate i can spell i can read i can write yeah you just can't talk no i can't talk and you can't write either so don't say that i can too right no you can't did you say you could read spell doesn't i can ride spell you know you know that one gets me you say that about every word no there's no believe there's about 82 words roughly spell believe believe yeah what were you saying what were you saying though you weren't you were saying something else not that it matters none of that matters don't let any people talk down when a guy when a guy has like bad handwriting don't you think that's an ick pins on that right wait an ick yeah it's an ick really because hold on some say good handwriting's an ick okay i think i think that means they wrote a lot of love letters or something i think medium handwriting is okay i think that's the best because good handwriting is a little artsy and a little it's a little weird if you have good handwriting no it's not weird for a dude it's a little weird weird for a dude to have good hand why do we need handwriting right yeah we have computers now that like stresses me out no i don't want my kid to not know how to write my kids are gonna hand write everything listen i'll be honest the only thing i've wrote in the last like year is my name pick it up i don't write anything that's not true what do i write you wrote me a card for valentine's day that probably had like 10 words on it oh you write love letters how do you want to split it actually dinner's on me okay well i got a venmo balance that i can spend with my venmo debit master card so well i venmoed you three times last week so it's kind of on me actually yeah you send it i spend it did my money get like reincarnated yeah it's chicken shawarma want it back i can't believe you like ate my venmo spend your balance instantly with the venmo debit card no monthly fee or minimum balance venmo balance account required to get a card and use a balance the venmo master card is issued by the bank or bank na i filled in the blank i got a love letter once wait you do you have yeah wait wait what was your love letter it was for valentine's day and he was like harper i love you so much wait how long ago was this two years ago this is so random but you guys know jordy yes first of all jordy she's so funny but she was she's having a concert i know she's having a concert here in dallas we're going well can i go yeah really yeah you want to come how much are the tickets you can just come yeah we'll just sneak you in i'll put you in the room in my purse okay and then you'll come in with me but yeah she's having a concert here in dallas in august and she's performing wait she's performing at the theater you guys ever did your first show at i know yeah isn't that crazy that's so full circle theater it's called the granada dang my and then she's gonna be like dancing and singing but she you know what's different about her show versus your show what she's like backup dancers and outfit changes you guys like knew your music but you didn't choreograph nothing y'all were just standing there why are we catching you straight but she she's like she's like she's like she's like she's like choreographing dances i'm excited anyways she'll be in dallas on august 22nd for a show and we're gonna be there and we're gonna be hype okay what are we saying i was saying about jordy before i started talking about her show um she one time uh one time blocked a guy and he he kept trying to get a hold of her and she blocked him and wasn't responding so he sent her this like four page letter and mailed it to her house four page letter she had a very long letter from this from this guy wait it wasn't that's why guys shouldn't learn to write right there what the heck bad idea wait it wasn't even her boyfriend no they were like talking and stuff sorry they were like talking and stuff and then did she fart no maverick is spitting on me no she's burping at me so i just i didn't i didn't burp i yawned and apparently she did that apparently it smells so wait you guys are saying you wouldn't send them send a very long letter to a girl that you you liked wait let's see kenzie what's the longest love with the guy i would not you like mail a letter to their house because they're not responding to your texts and they want would i mail a letter to a girl's house um mail it who'd mail it why would i mean i'd be i'd be definitely that's like full try hard i'll say that but what if yeah but he really liked her oh you know i'll tell you what letter too do you know i'll tell you what if you are not dating her very weird it's very very weird you better at least be dating speaking of somebody that's really if they block you and you're dating i feel like that's a hint that you guys are no longer dating what's uh speaking of uh like love letters and letters and emails i have been getting an email i'm not gonna say the name because i don't want it to get out and i don't want it let us check it afterwards because you used to get emails that kate and i how did someone even get your private email it's pretty easy um okay 42 42 emails is it the same guy that me and kate told you about no i don't think it's a different person different person so four new messages today um four sunday like it's it's just just so just so wait is this like an old man or something i hope not i don't think so just so y'all know when you spam someone's email with love letters they don't like that so you shouldn't do that and no i'm not flying to michigan see yeah that's weird just so you know she doesn't like that i know you're watching this stop sending those emails you're weird she doesn't like you she'll never like you you're weird gosh kg no i'm serious that was a bit harsh so uh no like it's just uncomfortable like every time i get these emails that's wait why are why are we being nice to somebody who is being insanely weird to the 17 year old well it's like he's spamming me and it's like i'm obviously not gonna respond he's being sweet he's he's just you know he has good intentions but it's probably not the best way to get your attention read the room she's 17 i got a question he is too she's um oh what kate's about to go off you don't even know who this person is okay well you don't know if he's 17 he might say what's the answer to that longest love letter you've got from mav from maverick yes like a few sentences maybe like three sentences that counts as a letter it was really like a note card for valentine's day that's it the only letter i've ever gotten who do you think i am you think i sit down and like write the declaration of independence for her i would baby i would i just haven't i just haven't done that yeah i haven't got i haven't had to tell you you're gonna say something else what was it the only letter that i've gotten from mad that is not like a card was whenever i got mad remember this is like when we first got married and there was laundry on the podcast yeah and there was laundry and i just got really upset about it and he wrote me a little card and it was like a happy face in a mad face and he was like mad kinsey happy kinsey life is better when kinsey's happy don't be mad or something like that and i was like you instead of you know maybe helping out with what's stressing her out i didn't even apologize or something i don't even remember what maybe i wasn't in trouble i don't know but i just wanted to be happy um i have the poop virus no you didn't i swear they say it's going through dallas no no i promise you i'm not kidding i have the poop virus no i i promise you like i get home like right now i'm finding the urge to go poop right now wait that's a thing it's a thing going around right now it's bad it's bad it's bad you don't have it cash you're just i've had it my whole life no no it just got here what i mean you might not be able to tell if you have it if you've had it your whole life but no i do i poop every day around no but like with the poop virus it's water that comes out oh stop it i just love saying that type of stuff it's not it's not like it's not it's not gross because it's water but um i drink water 10 minutes later it comes out oh stop it i don't want to hear that wait do you remember something i promise i can i can text blake and tell you do you remember when you wrote me blake what is blake why is blake looking at your toilet like no because he's with me all the time i'm not asking blake no one's asking blake anything about that okay fine okay what will make y'all believe me we don't want to you're missing the whole point here no i'm trying to see like what would make no i want y'all to believe me kate's asking a question now yes what were you gonna say oh i was asking do you remember that one letter you wrote me cash me yeah which one well you wrote me one time you wrote me it was it was it was a really nice attempt he wrote me a letter and he says since i know you like reading books i decided to write you one and then and then he proceeds to write a book well he wrote like like a like half a page and then he finished it off with my hand's getting really tired now so i'll just draw you a picture and then he drew me a picture ah picture book but i can't i can't tell you what the picture oh i remember the picture is bad picture oh my gosh we don't want to hear about that can't put the picture online it's not what you think but it was not a good picture barbara has any guys wrote you a letter yeah hey blake what virus do i have right now you have the pooping virus i told you blake i'm telling you they don't believe me every single time i get home i run upstairs because i freak out and i yeah right okay are you almost back because i'm scared you've crashed my car um sister i haven't crashed your car sister i'm right here by the buckies i'm not james charles all right bye all right we're taking harper's microphone away from her now all right so wait what was the question oh has any guys wrote me letters yeah yes what what what him what him let us say can i read it out sure no don't say their name no i won't read it i won't like what if they see this that's so yeah i don't read it don't read it oh no no it's fine yeah maybe don't read it oh no i don't care he doesn't care okay read it it yeah let's read it okay uh would you care if if i read your letter do not if you every boy should know if you are about to write a girl a letter remember she might show her podcast the letter well might podcast but she will show every friend she has all her friends are gonna know what i watched a girl i watched a girl get a letter from the dude and she literally took a picture and put it on instagram i was like this is so sweet i mean i was like why okay well i don't know why and writing a letter as a dude to a girl is the most embarrassing thing ever no it's not no it's embarrassing like kind of simply but you cannot like i when i was riding you want to say it's a bad thing to do no it's weird like i guarantee this if mav's writing a letter and i walk by he's hiding it he's gonna go and i'll be like what are you doing he's like i was it's like showing you have feelings and as a dude you're just not he's literally gonna be like i was just that's such a bad thing to teach holding this pencil and it did happen to me because i was writing you a letter and mav walked by and i did that same thing you walked in i was like and the thing you ever like fiddling with pencils here you want to take this sure yeah okay ready who is it hello hello goodbye okay ready yeah so this is from two years ago and i'm not gonna say the name but y'all might know who it is um okay and this is the perfect i'm looking back at this i'm looking back at this and he has like the perfect handwriting maybe we don't it's in the middle like look it's messy but not that maybe we don't read this out loud no it's it's it's it's fine can i read it wait matt you read it you read it that's who wrote this letter ain't nobody gonna guess who wrote this letter can i please read it out yeah you can read out because ain't nobody ever gonna guess that wait can i read it can i read it no i'm reading it out please no maybe don't read it don't read it please no no no it's wrong actually actually actually actually actually about mine you don't read that letter read it no it's so sweet okay ready no no no no already no no no no harper why because it was two years ago it's fine yeah it's fine no water under the bridge yeah i don't know i'm not gonna say i don't care who it is read the letter read the letter okay no to harper oh thank you poor kid no don't do this nobody knows who it is i have to see this person was i dating benny two years ago no who knows thank you for being a special person in my life i can't wait to see what the future holds i love hanging out with you and getting to spend time with you by the way we hung out like twice like before this letter what's this so mean no it's so sweet that's a lie but continue it shows what how much he cares about me uh i love hanging out with you and getting to spend time with you you brighten my day harper you mean a lot to me you're very pretty and sweet harper i love your smile and how perfect you are harper i love how you can be your own harper no matter what i love i love how you can be yourself no matter what harper thank you for always being there for me harper he says harper a lot i appreciate you he wants to make sure that you know who he's talking to how do you want to split it actually dinner's on me okay big money well i got a venmo balance that i can spend with my venmo debit mastercard so well i venmoed you three times last week so it's kind of on me actually yeah you send it i spend it did my money get like reincarnated yeah it's chicken sure want it back i can't believe you like ate my venmo spend your balance instantly with the venmo debit card no monthly fee or minimum balance venmo balance account required to get a card and use a balance the venmo mastercard is issued by the bank or bank na i appreciate you and everything you do for me and then harper and then that's it every sentence started with i and ended with harper i love you harper i love everything you do harper i appreciate you harper man you know what though that's very i kind of like it that kid wait i have a good idea what was that face i have a good idea what was he's done some questionable things yeah but isn't he good now oh uh yeah sure i have a question he's fine guys kate has a question yeah but we were talking about it's literally no it's literally the best idea ever do you guys remember when harper was gone and we wrote her letter harper do you guys remember that oh yeah yeah we should do that but write love letters to each other no to each other read them on the podcast all right dibs on uh i'll write mine too um uh no okay so uh that was is that how it works did we all just call dibs on who so yeah let's write a love letter to who we need to draw names on k or kenzie no we're not we're not doing this let's draw names i'm not writing cash love letters like well okay we'll do it next we'll do it on the next podcast shoot why do girls like just being glazed in a letter that's the best thing you would like it too but no he's better but i feel like like he genuinely cares like even as a friend but i'm saying like wait did y'all want this no because i like it better because there's a circle uh yeah yeah he's a good person oh speaking of embarrassing things like love letters i have something are you sure you want to show that yes no because that other thumbnail and title could be pretty good too what holy crap we saw leah wanton whatever the girl's name was ash travino ash travino who the heck is ash i don't know i forgot the person's name thumbnail worthy one time ash travino i don't think it is okay we don't even know who that is then show this because this will definitely make the thumbnail but this also feels evil yeah it's so fun harper you might not want to be in the room for this harper wanted to expose someone so i'm exposing her the fact that you exposed this love letter you do kind of deserve this i don't know what's about to happen nobody definitely know what it is can you put it no i promise you the tv no i'll just show it here no if you could cast to the tv be huge no no the only people who would cast to the tv would be huge no no the only people that know what i'm about to show is me and matt all right y'all ready wait she's freaking out right now we're going to expose harper is it a live video it's a video when she was from she was little uh littler all right did you ask here we go something i i i we found this wait screencast it i'm scared i acquired this video through my resources my mom put it on the tv if it's for my mom then there's gonna be some issues that i'm gonna have to deal with i'm gonna have to deal with it there's gonna be some issues at home no it is not i got this through a friend of a friend to a family member of yours of a friend through a friend all right here we go oh that's a blake did you see it no i'm scared put it on the tv i want to see it i feel bad this feels mean this feels ready three harper i'm against this don't show me is that me whoa anybody seen this i look good okay hello this is jordan good evening jordan this is your principal principal murphy what an honor to hear from you at 8 p.m on a school night yes sorry no no no no no no bother at all you should see my face right now i'm smiling from ear to ear can i speak to a parent of guardian can you speak to an imperative guardian or oh my gosh wait wait that was a joke um i'm gonna be quiet uh phone call i still act like that just one second jordan pippet chariot sorry she said one second principal murphy what an honor to hear from you after 8 p.m she's impersonating her mom i'm calling to have an important conversation about jordan well whatever my little darling teacup would do it's not her fault it's my fault so no need for that attention no need to expel my little teacup jordan there's no need for any discipline i will ground her for life no please no no god wait what is jokes on you i'm not embarrassed little wait you don't know what that is i mean it's a self-tape it's a self-tape but uh was that like your movie or something that was cute no that was for uh another audition you kind of killed it i clearly didn't make the audition oh but uh no yeah i i used to be into acting and i still am into acting no i just thought of it because uh there's a trend on tiktok everybody's showing their self-tapes yeah so i was like i bet harper has some self-tapes oh my gosh wait can i see your self-tape for your movie we have some more self-tapes would you like us to show them and jokes on you i don't think you could memorize a single thing memorize this i went to the park and i hung out with my friends and i got blue slurpees i went to the park and i hung out my friends and i got blue slurpees i went to the trash can and i went to play soccer and then i went to hang out maverick and then i went to go on a camera memorize this i went to the park and i hung out with my friends and i got blue slurpees i went to the park i went to my friends wait what the heck say it again you didn't say memorize the second thing idiot what's happening you're ugly that's a valid response what or just me you just like attacked her and pulled up an old self-tape that's not attacking that is it that is it i thought you said it wasn't embarrassing well it felt mean but it did mean what when i was just showing a sweet love letter that one of my exes wrote or that my only ex wrote me but y'all all said that's embarrassing to show off the love letter it's embarrassing all around there's a lot of embarrassing minutes going around yeah that's what we get for being on a podcast i've never done a self-tape but i really want to i want to do a self-tape for a survivor oh you know what's crazy i think i've done a self-tape really somewhere there's a self-tape i did find that when we were at the apartment me and you just moved to dallas i did a self-tape do you remember i feel like maybe you one of y'all helped me with it oh kate has a self-tape oh yeah i do have one pull it up i don't think i have it for what what are y'all doing self-tapes for there's just a we get casted for big movies all the time people yeah yeah always asking hey can you do a self-tape for to be the next superman hey can you do can you just send us we're casting for the biggest you're on your health grind and it's making me jealous a health grind yeah you're so healthy something like that we've always been pretty healthy but like you're on your health grind with pilates like she's like making an effort to actually do something and i've never done that in my life never put effort in not really oh no that was a crazy mistype really bad i just mistyped a word and it was really bad yeah i want to do a self-tape for survivor because i really want to go on there and win the million dollars yeah theoretically do you think i should audition for survivor no you would probably crack from the the food and actually the bugs you definitely would not like the bugs theoretically if you did go on survivor and you won a million dollars you wouldn't actually win the million dollars because taxes so theoretically it would be like six hundred thousand and then once you buy whatever you want to buy with it then you got none left yeah it's all gone so there's it's not really like much money i mean it's six hundred thousand dollars it's a lot of money don't get me wrong some guy said that on there it was some football player baseball player and he was like i mean six hundred thousand is a lot or millions a lot but he's like after taxes you get six hundred k so it's like and it's like it's like really yeah he got flamed on the show oh no yeah you're kind of gonna get flamed for that especially if everybody's working their butts off and everyone else is like this will change my life and he was like it's a nice bonus could you hand me my water bottle yeah here you go thank you yeah i think i could do survivor i don't think so who do you guys think would win on survivor out of us five i seriously last time we played survivor i was the loser i was the biggest loser i'm getting voted off no i think i seriously me and you would probably be in the end i would like to think that i think kate's getting voted off and she's refusing to leave we should make a takeoff for our i think she's like i'm not moving no this is bull i'm not moving why would i get voted off i don't know i just think when your time came i think you'd refuse to leave the set refuse to leave i don't think it's an option i'm not leaving sorry wait uh did you see our new account was going famous yeah i know me and harper are kind of popular you know it's crazy that episode hasn't even released yet really yeah oh yeah wait till it's out what are y'all gonna do with the account i don't know i told i told harper we should do something big on it but we don't know what to do maybe any ideas anyone oh my god i got an idea if we hit a million followers in three weeks you shave your head bald no i shave your head at you with that i said we should do if we hit like x amount of followers in x amount of time uh i'll let harper give me a tattoo oh okay no i think shaving your head grows back and i really want to see him bald you why do you like don't want a tattoo but you do well but a tattoo would just be funny like if you're gonna get a tattoo just full send it get the tattoos you want but stop getting stupid stuff but you know what would be embarrassing if we didn't hit a million followers all right no i think we will if we say i'll let you give whatever tattoo you want on me like any tattoo huh are you guys at like 70 000 or 30 000 we've only posted one video but we're at 30 000 why can't i gain followers that fast you probably could you could well i posted and it flopped anyways the profile picture is the craziest thing cash just made a picture i know that's crazy what is the other craziest thing is he's wearing the exact same shirt he wore in that video so oh i am because he doesn't change clothes and he doesn't wash his clothes yes i do actually i don't you want did you say to make a mixture of the two of you yeah at first it made like a baby it wasn't very good so then it made that this is a you have like a crazy picture yeah so what should we do tattoo no i think we should tattoo i think we should do something crazier like crazy wait can we wax your whole body but shaving my head isn't that crazy because it grows back i know that a tattoo is like more crazy like going completely bald like no hair left like waxing your head after you buzz it i think we wax your whole body including your head yes yes what i'm not waxing my head dude that would hurt do you think paper lettuce waxes head no that sounds like hair should we just yeah he'll let it grow out like let's just tell the audience say we see what the best comment is yeah guys comment down below what we should do on that account what the most like comment is you might not do it it may not happen this video doesn't go out for another week so it's like we need to figure this out now and get the bull the ball rolling is what my mom said she said that yes not about your account just in general it was for brat tv i figured those yes i can find it yeah let me see it he really wants to find this no you don't want to see it all right we're going to be episode with mav self tape enjoy the self tip guys i unfortunately could not find the video of the self-tape so here's a video i took of cash so bidet jumping around the yard like a ballerina oh wait can you do something better are you serious do something better all right is that that's good yeah that was good