Harper Is Evil...

If we hit three million followers on the cash and harbor account, by August 15th, I am waxing and shaving and shaving cash is Ed. Well, we know hair left on his entire body. The entire body. You're gonna wax your legs. And his eyebrows, everything. I think by the end of the year, if y'all hit 10 million, Harper said to do something. Yeah, let's see. What could a Harper do? Um, we knocked your teeth out. Alright, what's up guys? Welcome back. Me and Harper are starting the thing on our cash and harbor account. And it's probably already out actually at this point because we're probably going to film it right after this. And this episode doesn't come out for like two weeks. Um, but we have decided that if our account. And this is actually real. And I've shocked that of our account. I don't want to say that. No, is it your hair? Yes. Oh, if our account hits five million followers, you just want me to take my head and you don't want to check it. No, okay. If our account hits three million followers, which is in the middle of one million, yeah, away from my bride. If our if it's in the middle of one million, we talk too. Okay, well, if our account hits three million followers and get away from my food, there's flies everywhere. I don't know why there are so many bugs in this house. It's disgusting. Maybe probably because of me. Okay, you walked in there. This is the poor mole announcement. And we had three million followers. No, this is not a formal announcement. This is not something just so you know no matter how many times I say it on this episode, it is not official. It is official. No, it's not. It's not. It's not. Unfortunately, if we hit three million, why, why don't you shave your head, man? Because I don't have an account with harbor. If you harbor had an account, no, you wouldn't do it. No, meet Harper, rather than tell if it got five million followers, because it's not in a month, I would, I would, I would, I say, you want to shave your hair, but you're here all the way back, but you're all the way back. Let's see it. Yeah. Oh, this is what I look like. Gosh, I'd be shocked. You don't look like a Q-tip. Like, literally just like, you want to be that bad. You're making me mad. Wait, you don't get me, Kate. Wait, you don't think where it's like, it's like, select your skin tone and it just gets wider. That's his face. Look, it just gets wider as it goes up. And you'll never have a shaved head in your entire. What do you do? This is the time to do. Three million followers on TikTok. This probably grows back in what, like six months. Cash. - No, you're not always gonna have thick, pretty hair. You're gonna start going bald when you get older. - No, it's gonna reset your hair every once in a while. Anytime we play in a group trip, the biggest goal is simple. We want to actually spend time together and enjoy the people we're with. - My family experienced that when we took a trip to Descent Florida, with my family, there are always a lot of people, a lot of opinions, and a lot of moving parts when we're trying to find something. - Which sounds fun, but also slightly chaotic. - Very chaotic, but that's also what makes those trips so special. We like to say, through Airbnb, and having a place where everyone could come together made the whole trip feel so much easier. Instead of everyone splitting off after a long day, we could come back, sit around together, talk about what we did, and figure out what we wanted to do next. One of my favorite memories was everyone gathering around the dining table, after dinner, playing cards, laughing, and debating, who was actually winning. Because somebody was definitely making up the rules. - And honestly, those are usually the moments you remember the most. The conversations that happened when nobody's rushing anywhere, and everyone is just enjoying the end of it. - Plus, the family trips always have the random buddy moments that become the stories you tell later. Like, someone always forgetting something important. - Usually more than one person. - Okay, I feel targeted. - Looking at say, through Airbnb, gave us the kind of place where everyone could relax, reconnect, and make those memories together. - But let me do the formal announcement. - No, it's not formal. - If we hit, if we hit three million followers on the cash and harbor account, it's on. - Should we get assigned in a contract? - I'm gonna buy all this. - Wait, everybody stop interrupting her. - Yeah, I'm gonna keep interrupting, because it's not formal. I'm not allowing it to be formal. - Okay, but let her say her form. - You guys, none of you guys are going to be affected by this. - I don't know, you're gonna be affected. - I'm gonna have to sleep next to you every night. - So, have some hair back in like three weeks. - What if I look good at the bus cut? Some people look good at the bus cut. You could look good with the bus cut. - No, no, no, no. - You might look like Sid from Toy Story. - Okay. - Okay. - All right, ready? - Yeah. - Ready? Okay. Okay. - If we hit three million followers on the cash and harbor account by August 15th, I am waxing and shaving and shaving cash is head. - There'll be no hair left on his entire body. - That's not how. - The entire body, you're gonna wax your legs. - And his eyebrows are everything. - No, we didn't have that. Go on, eyebrows grow back in like two weeks. - Wait, wait, this is the whole video in itself. Just, you sit in there and harbor has you like tied down. She plucks each individual eyelash. - Y'all wonder what this is? - High lash? - High lash. - That'll be crazy. - You guys do things to stress me out. - This is what? - 22. - This is one of the things that stress me out. - What? - I said this is one of the things that stress me out. - There's nothing we stressed about. - Stay calm. - I feel like they're gonna hit three million followers. - And your husband said he was gonna buzz his hair and I said, stay calm, would you feel calm? - On YouTube, I'd stay calm. On TikTok, that's just stupid. - What? - You would not stay calm on YouTube. - She's better YouTube. - I bet. - 'Cause you're gonna be buzzed right now. - If he got three million subscribers, what a brand new YouTube channel. - If her, do you freak out on the podcast? - It's all about money. - She's like, I get paid for YouTube, so yeah. - What's the point of cutting your hair for no money? - On TikTok, you don't get paid, it's a shame. - Oh, just kind of make love with the game. - Yeah. - Love the game. - It should pitch her why off. - I feel like you should have to do something too when we hit it. - Oh, since there's nothing in the store for me, obviously people want to see me shut. - No, you got to get to three million, have cash, do something, and then you got to get to six million. - Why do you do something positive? - But we did this. - Oh, that's good. - That's good. - We did something to Harper. - What if I get braces? - Races? - I'm so sorry. - That would be expensive. - Braces? - I get them for free. - You know, I'm going to your aunt? - Braces? - I'm going to your aunt. - Braces? Braces? - I'm visiting your aunt. Look, I have an appointment. - Wait. - He's going to see her. - I have an appointment. - Does she do it in Visaline? - August 5th. - Really? - Okay. - I need to go see her aunt. - Okay. - Oh, August 5th. - What could you do? - It would be at six million on that account. - Five. - Or six. - You know what? I went to go get in Visaline. - Even better. - And my dentist told me my teeth were too messed up to get in Visaline. - Wait, are you serious? My teeth are straight. What are you talking about? - I know. - My teeth are too messed up for Invisaline. - That's what she said. She was like, your teeth are too messed up for Invisaline. - Hey guys, I know I'm interrupting your podcast right now. But this is not an ad. Okay, do not skip this. This is not an ad. This is for people who like making fan accounts, fan clips, edits, things like that. We are going to be doing competitions with you guys. So text this number and text LL to this number if you guys want to enter these competitions. We're giving away hundreds and I'm not even getting thousands of gift cards to places like Target, Sephora, Starbucks, places like those. So text this number if you guys want to be entered in any of these competitions. And these are going to be like every single week. So we're giving away literally, I'm not getting guys thousands of these gift cards. And all you guys have to do is make fan edits, fan clips, montages, and post them to places like TikTok, YouTube shorts, Instagram shorts, places like that. So text this number if you want to be a part of that. - That's what I think. - I think by the end of the year, if y'all hit 10 million, Harper Chefs to do something. - Yeah. - Well, whatever the meal is, we need to figure out what the thing is. - Why, why, why, why didn't you guys at least make this account on YouTube? Like they're saying so you could at least get paid while you do this. - No, I don't care about the payment. - Oh, yeah. - I care about the-- - You should. - TikTok holds no value. - True, but it holds cloud. - It does hold cloud. - And you want that because you buy love, right? - Didn't you fall off, you said? - Yeah. - We fell off together. We need to do something big. Come back. - Let's see, what could a Harper do? - Oh, she has to give me her Bronco. - That's not funny though. - No, it cares about that. - With my butt catches. - Get away from my fries. - Thanks, you have to get a bob. - Ooh, a bob. - Would you do that? For 10 million, you wouldn't get a bob. - For $10 million, I would, but I don't know. - No, 10 million followers. - That's what I'm saying. Followers on TikTok hold no value. - No, but it is a flat top for having followers or anything. - Yeah, kind of cool though. - Yeah, it is kind of cool. Let's see, what could a Harper do? - It's cooler when you have a full head of hair. - All right, if you give us something better than shaving my hair, maybe we'll do that. - Why do you go do something like, yeah, like go rob the pyramids or something like that? - I already had that on the spiritual. - I don't think the prison's good. - It's like I'd rather see you in prison than shave your head. - Unfortunately, that's like the one thing that people are gonna follow for. - Me buzzing my hair? - Yeah, like Papers said. - I don't know. - You've had the same haircut for nine years. You see Kate freaking out over this. You see like all these people are gonna be like, oh my gosh, this is insane. - We've always wanted him to get rid of that hair. - Yeah. - I personally think more people would subscribe if Harper was giving me a tattoo. - I don't think so. - Really? - A tattoo is permanent though. - It looks like, not if it's the eyebrows too. I'm telling you, no one said that. - People wanna see that. - No one said that. - People can even throw that in. - All the hair in your body is gonna be your eyelashes and eyebrows. - Wait, can we say a bigot's the fuck? 5 million you do eyebrows to huh 3 million it's your head. I'm not doing eyebrows I've heard million. It's your eyebrows. I've heard eyebrows actually don't grow back They do just takes a long time. Yeah, no then sweat how long do I go play a sport my eyes are just boiling just ah The sweat is just straight in your eyeballs Six weeks. No, that's false news. It's my tattoo. We disappear in four weeks. It's coming up on a year man. It's still there Dang is it still there? Yeah, yeah, that's just because he went deep. I met this guy who was a lip tattoo He got it done twice the first time he said I went away in two weeks in the second time He used a different guy and they went deeper into his skin and it's lasted six years what yeah my lip tattoo Yeah, and see now I got a husband with a stupid lip tattoo and I was gonna have a stupid buzz cut I'm stupid on the internet. He's a normal person off the internet but for some reason when he gets on the internet He's like I got to act like a five-year-old excessive people want to see news. Why are you talking about cashmaker? I like this is cash all in time Yeah, cashmaker acts like a normal functioning person to society off the internet. I'm actually like a normal functioning person right now Listen, you are gonna get a tattoo on your bald head Oh my gosh, he's so right I could put a tattoo on my shaved head and then when my hair grows back, it's gone It's gone. But if your hair grows back everywhere except for that spot If you ever lose your hair, you're kind of cooked by I go bald like 40 years from now You're like 70 and you're like what's on my head? It's just like mr. Beast logo that looks like trash That's a good idea Hair bald wouldn't be bad. I think we need to make a TikTok right after this I'm not gonna wake up tomorrow and we have a million followers. Yeah, I've seen some people that look good with buzz cuts Oh you have to see the dude's like army that look like sexy and they got like buzz cuts and they like what they look like I don't know I heard it though You're old man saying that and it's working. I'm getting rage-baited. It's so hard. No, you're not getting rage-baited. It's just real I'm literally I want to like throw my shoe at you. It's making me mad Don't you charm I mean you guys hit a million or three million followers We're gonna tie Kate up and we're gonna shave your head in front of her See those are the things that like make me cry and then everyone's like haha so funny You've been tell me you want me to mix it up and do something new with my hair. I have not said that yeah You have I literally just said hey, maybe don't dye your hair blonde. That's mixing it up No, you're gonna be fine. All right. We got to figure out what we're doing with Harper's at six million Once we hit three million. We're doing that six million. What in the wait? Wait wait? Three million oh wait, hold on. Why did you bring a pencil a paintbrush and a hammer? Does anybody know what's going on? Three million by what date August 15 by August 15th Which I don't know maybe we should do a little earlier. Let's do a little earlier. Wait wait Let me see what I did last time. It's just I'm being gluttonous Does anybody want to fry? Castle save his head Okay, you're gonna be fine. We just might have to tie you up why we shave him. It won't be that bad I'm not going to be here for it. I'm not gonna give you guys the satisfaction. I've seen my reaction. What's wrong with him being involved? It's just he's gonna lose his Well, yeah, sit down sit down. Yeah, they sit down because Kate's being disrespectful towards the ball community right now Yeah, please we are a proud people here Tell to his face Kate. Yeah, what's wrong with this? Go ahead. Tell him. You want to know cash is exact and tattoo She didn't like those either He does have a weird shaped head Cash is not work cash is exact words. I guess I wait. What did I say? I didn't read it. You already signed it Three mill. Yeah, you guys are gonna hit that tonight. We saved it tonight Cash said that you have a good shaped head for being bold, but that he does not I That's a paintbrush Yeah, she got a paper she got a hammer, bro My cortisol levels are so high right now. Why are you so stressed out about it? What's problem? I want him to lose his hair Oh What is this seriously, what is this? There we go. Hey, Kate tell the ball man what you were saying Here I'll say one thing I'll say one thing Eventually one day He's gonna be bald you masal speed up the process. That's it So we should enjoy your hair while you have it instead of just cut it off earlier Well, it's already signed. What did I sign? I did not read it three million by August 15th 2026 cash will shave his head wait we said a month That is about a month No, that is one two Three and a half weeks That's a million a week I think it's gonna happen. No, I'll shave his head That anyway, my saying John who signed that we should have done it for the whole podcast if the podcast can hit like 10 million subs My son is crazy. Why? Oh? Maybe we can do something with all of us if we get 10 million followers or sub-subs of crap we also have our heads I'm down You're down Like everyone shapes their head If in two weeks we hit 10 million No, I don't think it is Well, we need to do something good because they're not shaving their heads they have to but they won't I'm not shaving my head This took me 25 years to grow Well, they can do it. We get praying them of a bald caps on. No, that's not fair What to the millions of people that's up you have to actually stop maverick would look like an alien with a bald head I There's so much bald slander. It's crazy. It's not bald slander. Why don't we just do both? Why don't we do if the pod hits like X amount the girls get a shave both of our heads and nobody wants that if the pod hits 10 million subs in Three weeks I'll shave my head and see you get another contract up here. No So stressed out we're making more contracts Hey, so we're still up for the three million by on our oh Oh on our account if we hit six mil after the three mil I give you a tattoo Oh, that's fine. That works. I'm not gonna show your hand. I'll make the contract. Yeah. Oh, but what would you give me a tattoo and where would it be? My lip bottom of your foot No, it'll say bottom of the foot Bottom of the foot and the tattoo is up to artist discretion, which is on the artist no, I want to get it um probably like on my lip Okay, okay, like the bottom on yes. Okay. We need two contracts. Did you bring two pieces of paper? Oh wow Okay, contract one is If we hit six mil in the cash and Kate or cash and Harper account Bye, you have cash. Oh, yeah, this is a six miller Is this what you guys meant when you said I wasn't meant to be an influencer because I'm not I don't like making content this much What by doing contracts to shave your head? Yeah, I don't want to be making content if that's what this entails I don't like this Oh, my hands bleeding from when we had to put that up there. All right To what did I say tiktok at cash in harbor? Okay. Thank you. Um, all right the next contract Should be the exact same thing, but if it hits six million by What time August 30th by more markers to stab in the wall by September 15th. So month after okay by September 15th Then harbor cash gets to give harbor a tattoo On the lip Yeah Uh, don't sound the lip though. We might watch where the tattoo. What should it be? On a tattoo up to artist a discretion. Yeah, maybe Well, it could be a little I don't really like oh well. I like something more like a donkey Hmm, donkey's good. Yeah, a donkey. Yeah, see you don't want that on your lip Is just not gonna be happy with that Harper's mom. Yeah, she won't care. I'm gonna be 18 and I'm gonna move out Well, you're not 18. Yeah, you still live at home. Oh, you're not 18 and will you be 18 by September? No March we'll have to ask your mom if we can give you the tap She'll say why don't you call her right now. See what she says. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah Call my dream. Should I ask her should you? I feel like I have a better chance of getting me. Yes Uh, you can talk. Yeah Okay, I find you asked, but she's gonna say no to you. Yeah, you can talk. Okay - This is a horrible idea. - Hey. - Hello. - Cash has a question. - Yes. - Okay, so at me and Harper, did you see me and Harper made a TikTok account? - Yes. - Yeah, so at three million followers, Harper's gonna shave my head. And at six million followers, if we hit six million in the next two months, can I give Harper a lip tattoo? - No. - Mom, it's unshown. - Scratch the contract. - It's unshown. - I don't know about that. - If we hit a lip tattoo, then we'll literally go away. Don't-- - Trust me, they go away. - They go away. Cash got one for the podcast. Remember when he got one for the podcast? - It went away. - It's already gone. - I don't know. - It's fine. It get literally beat down. - It's not like a hinta. - I think you're gonna get that mic out of here. - What did you just say? - Hey, what did you say? - The best example. Mom, it's a funny joke. - Everybody, for my followers, everybody would want to see it. And it's not a bad look. It's a bad look. - Okay. - We're gonna have a-- - Let's go. - Okay, but it's a yes. - And now it's not a yes. - It's a ball. - I don't want you to get a lip tattoo. Can we think of something else? - Oh, lip. It's on the inside. I'm not always dragging my lip. - Wait, if we hit six more, we give you a lip tattoo. - It's not talking to me like this. - Can we give you a lip tattoo? - Yeah, that's good. - That's absolutely nice. (laughing) - All right, well, don't say that. - All right. - You can sign that contract. - What if there is a lip tattoo that I love my mom? - I don't know, we not. - Uh, how about a new contract? (laughing) - Okay, how about-- - All right, this is for the pod one. - Who could amputate a toe? - Yeah, I'd be fine with losing my pinky toe. (laughing) - I'm so serious. - Yeah, for 10 million subs, I can't believe this is probably worth it. - For every 10 moment. (laughing) - And until you have a numb, you just got two numbs. - Imagine we actually did that. - You guys think without your feet, you tell you you should be able to walk like 100% fine? - Oh yeah. - What's the cash in the app channel at? - Five mil. - Five mil? - Five mil? - Like five, five. - Wait, let's just say the pod. Let's just say the pod. - Do you think 100k this month? - Let's say if the pod hits five mil. - It's out. - We have Ashabino on the pod gas. (laughing) - Let's see, L pod in 60 thousand subs. - We would need 1.8 million more. Yeah, I say we just tell, actually, no, I say, should we make it five or 10 mil for the podcast? - 10. - Because low key the shorts, any of the shorts eat, those get high subscribe rate. We've had shorts one short before, get us like 500,000 subs. - Yeah. - No, 700,000. - Yeah, 700,000 from one short. So I'm a little nervous about 10 mil, shape my head on the pod that might happen in one short. - I say we do it. - Okay, 10 mil. - What's the pod I write now? Two, three. - Three point two. - Oh my gosh. - So say, say 10 mil. 10 mil, meme app, shape our heads. - By win. - On YouTube? - Yeah. - By the end of the year. - End of the year, holy no. That's definitely happening. - It has been kind of tough. - In a month. - No, like a week, bro. - No, no, no, no. - When this episode comes out, they have one week from when this episode comes out. I'm telling you. - One month from now. - August 21st. - No. - I'm not agreeing to that. It needs to be a week. - You're saying this isn't gonna go fast, but nobody's gonna subscribe. - No. - You don't understand. - No, let me show you. - I don't know, subscribe. - What? - I don't wanna be bald. - I love my hair. - I love my hair. - I'm telling you a whole ton of my hair. - You said Kate was, or Kate. You said Kenzie was fake in this. She would not be okay with Mabbib buzzing his head. And she's making the contract. - No, the second the razor hits to his head, she's gonna freak out. - No she ain't not. She's gonna have the razor. She's gonna be like, "Give me your head." - I just know. I saw one time we were doing something with Mab's hair and it wasn't that bad. - It was for zero dollars. - That's what I'm saying, we didn't like it. - His hair has a cost. - Kenzie will do anything to me for money. - She's like, "Y'all wanna shoot him?" - If you pay, I got a house to pay for. - A little podcast, get 10 million subs on YouTube. - I won't be here for it. I know you guys just want a good reaction. I mean, I won't be here. You're not getting that. - What? - You won't get a reaction out of Kenzie except excitement. All right, part of this video, look. 16 million views, which is like a lot, but not like a ton. And again, just 350,000 subs. And then look. - Woo-hoo. - And this video, 75 million views, 582,000 subs. - Whoa, we 75 million views. - Yeah, but it gained just almost 600,000. - On your highest viewed video. - On YouTube, 75 million, on shorts. - Well, on shorts, yeah. Long form, like 160 million. - Yeah. - All right, 10 million, we'll buzz Mab's hair in a month, huh? - By way. - By August 21st. - No, August 15th. Make everything August 15th, it'll be a crazy day. - August 15th. - Crazy day. - That'll be great. - August 15th. - August 15th. - No, do all this 21st. - Do all this 21st. I'm telling you, by the time this episode comes out, it's okay. Wait, when does this episode come out? - Huh? - When does it come out? - I don't know. - I see, so you're saying it'll only be like two weeks. - Yeah. - Okay, that's fine. - I'm so serious. - Oh, it's close. I want it to be close. I don't want it to be like-- - Can I just be nice for myself? - What do you want to do? - Like, can I just like, I don't know, if I go to Paris, if we hit 10 mil, no, that's not how that works. - It has to be something to hurt us. - Yeah, I don't think you'll, we'll subscribe for you to go to Paris. Maybe they will. - If we hit 20 mil, I'll shoot Kate with a taser. - What the heck? - Ooh, it's a little bit, I will press charges. - It looks like Matt's just like, ah! - And when does she-- - What if you all get to $3 million? By then, your head's already shaved. - Well, then it's just Matt. It's just Maverick to do it. - She goes, okay. (all laughing) - She's like, that makes sense. (all laughing) - Fine, friends. - No, it's Kate's hair is already shaved. - Did you have a grown back? - It's just shaved. (all laughing) - I just got to have every shave. (all laughing) - It took me three weeks to grow that. (all laughing) - You can't do this to me. - You can't do this to me. - All right, I'm reading it this time. Show up podcasts at 10 million cash. We'll die! (all laughing) 10 million subs on YouTube by August 21st. - I can't get one of y'all. - 2026. - Kill? - Wait, hold on. Let me read the contract. A little podcast gets 10 million subs on YouTube by August 21st, 2026 and cash and map shape heads. Yes, I was sent right there. Everyone has that one friend who's always saying, "I have the best business idea." And they'll tell you about it, a clothing brand, a snack company, a phone case, whatever it is. And then six months later, they're still just talking about it. I think the biggest thing that stops people isn't having a bad idea. It's all the what ifs. What if nobody buys it? What if I don't know how to go to a website? What if I mess something up? Well, that's why Shopify is so cool. Shopify is the commerce platform behind millions of businesses around the world and 10% of e-commerce in the US helping everyone from major brands to people just launching their first business. They make it easy to get started with hundreds of store templates. They have AI tools that can help write product descriptions and improve your product's photos and everything from inventory to payments to analytics and it's all in one place. Plus, if you run into a problem with Shopify, they have award-winning 24/7 customer service support. So instead of wondering what if, why not see what happens when you actually go for it? It's time to turn those what ifs into with Shopify today. Sign up for just $1 per month trial at Shopify.com/LOL. Go to Shopify.com/LOL. That's Shopify.com/LOL. Cash rips off all of these fingernails. How about we shoot cash for the thousand paintballs? Wait, I'm an idea. I'm an app. Sign? Yep. If we had six billion, you pepper spray me. No, he can't do that either. Oh, that'd be a good one. I think we could do that one. Ask your mom that one. Okay. If we can pepper spray you. I don't like her right now. Call Maudrey. Okay, we get, hey, oh, you need this to hang it up. Or maybe Taze? Uh, pepper spray? You hang it up or you go? Yeah, I can do that. Put it on the official wall. I'm like, what? This contract says, thank cash and mav. We'll shave Kinsey's head. No. What? Will not be doing that. Kinsey's shaper head. I need someone to hold this. Take and hold it. No, I'm not doing it. I would give myself a bob. If cash and mav got 20 million YouTube. A bob? A bob. That's the best I can do. That looks pretty good. Well, Maverick is so shaved as an anus because he's a bald spot on the back. What? Here's his risky. If you shaved it, I don't know what's coming back. I do. Yeah. Not in the certain spot on the back of the-- You've got to see his picture, mav, I got. Oh, you're going to love this. So he's been playing pool at main event. And he's been going-- That's different. No, just wait. What do you mean that's different? He hasn't played a whole lot, though. He's gone like how many times do you think you've gone? In the last year, I've gone twice. To main event? You've gone one time to main event. Oh, yeah. Oh, just playing pool. To play pool, I've gone twice. No, just anywhere, twice. No, not just main event. I've held a pool stick twice. No. If you play pool all the time, no. Anyways, he's been taking it very seriously. So he bought himself a-- Very seriously, we're in twice. He bought himself a pool glove to help him shoot better. Look at this. Oh. Let me see. He wears that to main event. He brought a glove for everyone to wear. And he wanted all of us to-- I've got a pack for everybody. It was a party pack. And it looks like Spider-Man. It looks like Michael Jackson, dude. Let me see. Yeah, you have got to be like, hey, hey. You literally said it's like-- Wait, let me see. I just told her it's in. It's literally they make you-- It's better for playing pool. And I'm going to be back. I brought some for everyone, and nobody wore them. - Well then, then, Macash missed the picture. - And what are you scared of getting a bruise on your hand? - No, it makes it like smooth when you show. - No, right before this armor, he couldn't reach the ball, so he was literally flat on the table completely. - He was laying down for me. - This was literally Mav shooting pull. He put a glove on. - What was I love? - And then he was like, that's never happened. - I like that, my back does not arch like that. - I'm not kidding, that's what he did. - I'm sorry, he was arching globally, yeah. - My back don't arch like that. No, it did. - I should've taken a picture. - You were trying to take a picture, but he moved when we did. - Because a few episodes ago, I'm pretty sure I saw you arching while doing a plank. - No, no, that was spasming, my back was spasming. - It was really sad, we got in the truck, and I saw Mav's little box of gloves, and I was like, "Oh, did you play pool?" 'Cause they went and played pool when I was out of town. And he was like, "Yeah, we did." And I was like, "Did you get to use your gloves?" And he was like, "Yeah, I used my gloves." And I was like, "Did you like it?" And he was like, "Yeah, I liked it." And I was like, "Well, did your friends use the gloves?" He was like, "They didn't want to use the gloves." And I was like, "Oh, that's so sad." - They didn't want to use my Michael Jackson, bro. And it's like the worst part is it's not just a glove, there's a hole for two fingers to hang out of. Like, it's just like a hole. - 'Cause you just need the three fingers. It's a three-finger glove. - The guys love to finish it off with a full glove. - Yeah, 'cause you just need like three. What, why? - Yeah, you might as well, you look like a- - What is this, and did you put this on? - Yeah, what is on you right now? - What is this, and did you put this on me Harper? You did. And it's sticky, and it got stuck on my leg hair, and I did not wear it. - Oh, what is that? - What is that? - Answer the question. What was that? - What do you, I need to start talking. - When I sat down earlier, I had to move stuff out of the way. And I looked down briefly, there's like five items. I could not tell you how or when you got them. Like, come over, I usually bring like seven different things with me. - She does have an assortment. - Like, what is in your hand right now? - It's that thing. - Yeah, I'm really looking through the other case. - You really require all these items. What are y'all looking at? - Oh, nothing. - I'm on the car, I'll be right back. But, what's it called? I always have some random thing in my hand. It's a, oh yeah, after I watched a Michael Jackson movie, I needed Blake watching Michael Jackson movie. - I don't know. - We were acting like we were best friends with Michael Jackson. - Wait, what do you mean you're acting like you're best friend? - We were role-playing again. - No, no, we were role-playing. - We thought you stopped this. - No, we were like completely like, we were like, oh my gosh, we love Michael Jackson. We like, I feel like we were best friends of them after the movie, because of how good the movie was, and how good it played Michael Jackson out to be. And we were like, no, he did not touch kids. - Yeah. - But he definitely did. (laughing) - My mom's calling, like, what's the thing? Oh, Poverse Ray. - Yeah. - Yes. - What about Papperspray? - Papperspray. - No, I'm saying like, is it okay if we hit six million followers, for cash to Papperspray, we need your consent. I'm fine with it, you're fine with it. Perfect. - I just think that has a terrible idea. (laughing) - No, no. - Like, it would have really hurt. - Yeah, do you have any good ideas then? - Yeah, like, do you have any good ideas? - Not tattoos, not Papperspray. - Why not Papperspray? - It hurts for an hour. - Cash is gonna shave his head. So Harper has to do something for you. - You have to get an ice bath and stay there for three minutes. - Are you seriously kidding me? (laughing) That is some challenge that you would do in a normal YouTube video. I'm saying, this is for six million followers. This is a lot of followers. And we need-- - It's really tall. - That's why I'm saying, I'm saying Papperspray would be perfect 'cause it's an ongoing inside joke on the podcast. - We could pull it tooth? - No. - I know what you should do. - She's definitely Papperspray. - I guess that's okay. - Okay, bye. - Wait, actually? - I mean, not really. (laughing) She's just trying to get off the phone right now. - I have a great idea for six million. - I have, it is not many other ideas. - Okay, good bye. - No, I have an idea. I have an idea. - Oh, she hung up. - We attach cash to a machine. - That simulates childbirth. - What, this is for Harper? - Yeah, we need to find an idea for me. - Oh, I really liked that one too. (laughing) - I don't know, I really think we might have to do the Papperspray. - Or like maybe I go out on public. - Yeah. - That's it. - I share. - I don't like that. - I share, I share. - I share the green paper secret. - Oh. - It's Tunisian. - It's Tunisian. - That would be because all my morals of life. - Yeah, but it's like Tunisian. - It's like people that don't know that would be like, what? - Yeah, true. - I like the ice bath, I think. - No, what? (laughing) - What have you said in the ice bath for three minutes? - I told the y'all to drive. - No, no, no, not the ice bath. - Wrong one, I thought it was good ice bath. - No, she's watching it. You're just trying to get on her good side. - Yeah, don't hate me. Still, let me use your hot tub. - Wait, I better-- - Did you know that, Harper? - Yeah, Cash called me and said, hey, you're not coming to your hot tub? - Yeah, 'cause I called your mom and they didn't pick up. So I was like, maybe they're out of town. - It was broken. - Weird, that would be, oh, by the way, it's not broken. - What, should I? - No, I'm kidding. (laughing) - Yeah, me, Madrigan, Papetace, we're all sitting around here like, we need a hot tub and you were our only friend that had a hot tub. And it's broken. - I'm a friend? - At least good enough one to use her for her hot tub. - So we thought. (laughing) - No, I am thinking-- - You don't really need a friendship now, broken hot tub. - I'm thinking like, what if we do something like, - Kate, what do you think? You haven't given many ideas. - There's a problem with a lot of these ideas. - I told you guys, I don't care. - You're not long-term enough. - I know. - What? I don't care about followers, I don't care about money, I don't care about any of it. - Are you trying to be humble? - No, I don't care about any of it. I don't have to do stupid things like shave your head completely or it's just pretty hard for the person. - Okay, just cares about going to events. - What would, what would Kate's podcast be? Ready, this is Kate's pod. Go ahead, say what you want. - I have a great idea. - What? - We give back. - To what, the community? Whoever needs to be given back to. - Give what back? - Bad guess. - And whatever way you want to. - 'Cause I'm not giving myself back to the girl. - She's not doing anything humble today. - Listen. - You could do something like-- - I respect it. - You could do something like-- - I just don't think you get 10 million followers in a week to get back. I think it's gonna happen. - Good, good, good. You could say, when we hit 10 million followers, we'll be picking 10 of you out of the 10 million subscribers to give something to. - I don't think they'll go for that. - I bring 10 subscribers on the podcast. - No, Kate, this is your pod. What do you want to talk about? It can be anything. Not if we get followers. - But wait, when it comes to the if we get followers, we talk about that the entire time. - Before we switch, I think we just need to really focus on something serious and long-term. - My mom said, "How about you spend the day dressed "as up as an inflatable dinosaur in public?" Chat GBT gave me that idea. - That was cute. - That is cute, but she's grounding me right now, so I'm not happy with her. - Okay. - She's grounding me. - Kate, we're gonna let you pick the next topic. Okay. - My topic for the podcast is the book I'm reading right now. - Oh, not a book. Anything besides a book. - I got nothing. - Ooh, what if Harper has to make a video or something? Like go do something that's like-- - You're starting to sound like what all of this is. - No, go do something that, like a video or something that's like-- - Like go to Paris and take Kate and Kinsey with her. - Okay, let's-- - No, no. (laughing) - Harper has to get me a piece of the great Pyramids Giza. - No, no, no, I'm not talking about that. I'm talking like she has to like, "Hey, how about we switch the topic." We've been talking about this forever. - Yeah, I know, that's what we're doing. - But I've really enjoyed it. - Oh, but I do think that we need to figure out something so we can post it right after this podcast 'cause I wanna see-- - Well, I don't, it's not as urgent because first we have to hit the three mill. - No, it's pretty urgent. - No, but once we're getting close to the three mill, then we'll make sure we finalize that so we can sleep on tonight. - Yeah. - And wake up with good idea. - Are we posting it today? - Yeah, we can post it right after that. - Oh, it's perfect. - All right, now gate one topic, would you like to talk about? - Let's talk about me going back to school, or by all, I feel like we talk about me a lot. (laughing) - Maybe we can talk about-- - You're right, we don't talk about Noah enough. - Noah? - How's your life? - Noah. - Pretty good. (laughing) - It's pretty good. - Noah's asked you how you're doing lately, have they? - No. (laughing) - That's the point. - Yeah. - Man, that was fun. Oh, okay, so, oh, that's enough about Noah. (laughing) - I wonder how, where's Chase? - He left. - He's gone. - Yeah, he left. - No, but Kinsey and I are pretty excited. - I love Chase. - I'm excited right now. - I love Chase too. - I can't let me sit around him. Am I gonna hang out really with him? - Oh, are we all excited? - We're excited, 'cause our houses are finally about to be built. - Yeah? - Big for yourself. - Is your house gonna be built too? - No. - Yes it is. - Dude, you're farther along than we are. - There's no road. - Guys, we have two conversations going on. We got houses being built and it's Chase Q. Is that what I heard over there? For some reason, anytime those two start talking, Harper always asks me questions. - Yeah. - I'm sorry. - And then we have a great conversation. I feel like he gets messed. (laughing) - Yeah. - Let's talk about-- - Let's talk about-- - Let's talk like Michael Jackson for a second. - Wait, think of a topic to talk about? - Yeah, let's think of a topic. - No, what do we do? Let's just see what the conversation is going on. - Oh, okay. - Oh, maybe. Oh, I asked Maverick if he thought Chase was cute. - He said yes. - I think he's a nice-looking fellow. - And why are we talking about that? - You know what he's-- - You know what he's single. - Yeah, I'm married, Harper. - I know, but like-- - It's fine for me to say he's nice-looking. Don't make it weird. Let's make it weird. How do we do that? - Yeah, we're good. Make it weird. make it weird. Maybe call Jason, tell him he's cute. Yeah, we can tell. Wait, wait, call him and say you're cute. Oh wait, I got a story. One of my friends told me this this week. One of my friends said she was at a sleepover and that when she was at the sleepover, she was like eight or nine years old and she saw the friends that she was staying at. She saw her friend pee in a trash can. Yeah. And so she told the parents. Is this friend Kate? What friend do you have that's a girl? The only friend I would have that's a girl that's y'all's friend that I just don't want to expose her name. Wait, who? Okay, continue. Who? The other friend that's here. She's at the house right now. Oh, and she was at this sleepover and she saw her pee in a trash can. So she told her the parents of that girl that was at the sleepover. Wait, wait, uh, the girl downstairs is the one who cheated in the trash can. No, no, no, she witnessed. So she's a battle. Yes, I'm joking. We love her. So my friend got invited to sleep at this girl's house when they were like eight. She saw the girl pee in a trash can. So then she told that girl's parents and the parents punished her. Why would you be in a trash can? I don't know. I just do that. I got a story like this too when you're done. I did too. And then, uh, the parents punished her for tattling and made her do pushups. What? That's weird. Yeah. I was like, who? I was like, yes, she was like, Hey, your daughter just peed somewhere. She's not a lot of pee. And they said, why would you tell us that? Start doing pushups. Can you tell a story? When I was in junior high, it was like, when you're in junior high, that's when you start using the girl's locker room to change your clothes for gym class. And this girl did not care about gym class at all as she was just a crazy human being. And instead of using the stalls, we have a toilet in them. She pops a squat in the sink. Oh, and peas in the sink. That's a great idea. Yeah, yeah. That's terrible. That's like, why are we that? I have two stories. I have a, a thing for you to do. If you hit six million, you have to have Natalie Reynolds back on the podcast. Well, that one's good. I don't want to have her back on. I will think on that one. What's your story? So when I was in sixth grade, I thought I was a class clown. And I was, but I think you still think that. Yes, but no, when I was not really anymore, I kind of just get embarrassed and school. But when I was in sixth grade, I thought I was a class clown and I basically was at a sleepover with all my friends. And there's a video and it went around. Oh, no. Oh, no. And I got posted everywhere. And everybody's like Harper drinks pee. Like, I'm sorry. It happens. And so, um, so me my friend peed in the cup. Is this the same time you pooped in the hot tub? No. But that also happened. Honestly, I'm not even embarrassed anymore because it's like, it's high school. People are going to draw. If people are going to make fun of you, I think I'm the most hated person in the school, but I don't mind anymore because I'm almost gone. Anyways. Um, so yeah, basically what happened was I peed in the cup and I drank it as a joke. Not like the full thing. I had a little sip and it got posted everywhere. Wait, it was actual pee. Mm-hmm. It was actual pee. Yes. And my mom said you can get organ failure from that. You didn't drink actual pee. I swear my wife had it. Oh my gosh. I don't know that that's one of those things that I would just admit. Yeah, I'm pretty sure she did though. I did. And then there's another. What was the other thing? I can tell you if she did. What did it taste like popcorn? She did. Hot popcorn. What? How do you know? It was hot popcorn. It was so mean. Cash boiled pee one time. Why? We tried to filter it. We tried to distill it. Oh, with a with a live straw. Pretty much. Yeah. Wait, can we do that? We could. I love live straws. One time I was staying the night at my friend's house. Well, you're going to be throwing one. And by my friend's house, I mean my cousin's Alex's house. So sorry, Alex is in this or his mom because I, uh, I, uh, oh, I was staying at the night of your house one time. And when I was there, you know, I was like eight nine years old. You just shared this with me like three days ago. This is insane. I was like nine years old. Uh, and I peed on your couch when I slept when I was using when I was sleeping. I peed on the couch. Like just full blown peed on it. Um, why? I did not have allowed my child to invite you over as a friend. Unfortunately, no, is when I was sleeping. Yeah, I still, uh, you would not have been allowed. Well, they didn't know. I love cash income to play, but by 6 p.m. He's got to go home. No, no, because listen, they didn't know because obviously you're so embarrassed that you just peed all over their couch. So what do you do? It's not your house. You don't know where the cushions, you don't know where the clean heat supplies are. So you flip the cushions. Oh my gosh, you know, I know your piece things. And then when you're, you know, he disguised he popped popcorn. Yeah. And I've always thought about that because I've done that honestly, I'll be completely for real. I've done that at least twice in my life. I mean, when I had sleepovers, it was bad. I used to pee all the time in my bed, but I had a plastic bed. So it was fine. Is that like something like genuinely? I know that happens to some kids. Is that like, like, why does that happen? It's because they're like too cool. Uh, well, if I'm going to be honest, I wouldn't make fun of you, but the night after homecoming and prom, that's all I was saying. God, you peed like last year. So the night after homecoming and prom, I peed my pants. Awakers sleep. I woke up and a puddle will pee. Wait. I can't blame people when it's a wake up. I was conscious. And I just peed my pants. So it's fine. This is true. Yeah. Remember, yeah. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, something you should get controlled. Thank you. Thank you. Everybody. Thank you. But yeah, no. I've been dying because I'm so tired. Like, I woke up at 7 a.m. This morning. What were you doing at seven? I had your camp. Oh, and then I fell asleep at 4 a.m. last night. I woke up in a bathtub. Don't know why this morning at 7 a.m. You woke up in bathtub. I'm not very sure. No, I'm not. I woke up in a bath. Okay. I don't think that's a song. Anyways. Um, no, but yeah. So I woke up in a bathtub. I think I was sleep walking last night or something. Oh, that would be the way. Was there water in it? Yeah. There was like a little puddle water and I close on and everything. And I was so confused. But sleep walking is creeps me out. I know that that we were talking. It's like weird. Like one time recently. I think I told this the other day. But I woke up like a couple months. Yeah. I woke up and I was just I was in the shower. It was nighttime. Like 4 a.m. I woke up. I went to bed. And then I woke up. And I was in the shower at the water running, sitting on the bathroom for. And I was just like, and I was just like, how am I in here right now? You fell asleep in the shower? No, I fell asleep. No, no, he was in bed. I went to bed with Kate woke up in 4 a.m. I'm in the shower. I realized you wet the bed. I was like, I should shower. And then you know, right? That's right. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. I always say right. Right. Yeah. Well, we should probably in the episode. Okay. Has Pilates. They get to know what's you guys next? Oh, make sure to subscribe so we can hit 10 now. Oh my.