Gracie & Tisha Alyn on Professional Golf, Girlhood, & Growing a Business

I honestly ask myself, would baby Tish be happy? Yeah. Yeah. Would baby Tish be proud? Abso-fucking-lutely. You can sit here and be like, why am I not there? But like, little Gracie is like sitting on a beam being like, oh my god, like look where gymnastics took me. Like, we get to do this until we can't. So we might as well make the fucking most of it while we can. When you're in a state of gratefulness, you can't actually be anywhere else. Oh my god, Gracie! Why am I actually crying, you guys? She's redefining golf as a whole. From competing professionally to becoming one of the biggest creators in the game, she's helping make golf feel cooler, more inclusive, and far less intimidating for the next generation. Through her viral content, bold personality, and unapologetic authenticity, she's changing the culture of her sport in real time. She's also the founder and CEO of All In, a brand designed to help women feel more confident, stylish, and empowered every time they step out on the course. I'm excited to hear all about Tisha's career in golf, how she built a brand in a male-dominated industry, how she developed self-confidence and identity beyond competition, and what it really takes to create her own lane in women's sports. Tisha Allin, welcome to Athletes After Hours. Thank you for having me. This is great. Of course. I know, I'm so excited. I feel like we're, I feel like I know you. Like, I feel like in, what's, what's it been, like two weeks now? No, literally, like two weeks. Literally in two weeks, we have become like besties. It's great. I know. Yeah. I'm at your place. You've been at my place. Like, you met my mom. Oh yeah, we're in there. I'll be invited to Thanksgiving dinner. Oh yeah, absolutely. Yeah, of course. So you're Filipino now, basically. I'm the token Filipino sister. Yes, yes. Love it. I do feel like because we've been through very similar journeys and we are in very similar spaces, it's like we do kind of have this, this bond. Yeah. And we have this really mutual understanding of like, okay, we both know we, we grinded and we put so much of ourselves and our passion into this that it's just like the mutual respect and the understanding is so clear when I meet girls like you. And so I'm just so, so excited that we get to sit down and just like get to know each other. Yeah. Get to know each other better and, and get to know like your journey because girl, you've had a journey. Oh, thank you. I appreciate it. And I just want to say that like mutual, like mutual feelings. Like I think whenever we meet other girls in the space who have gone through like the same grind, but more importantly, when you meet others that are like girls, girls, like, you're a girl's girl and like, I'm a girl's girl. And I think that's why we like mesh so easy because not all the time. I mean, I've never had a bad experience, but like there are times where you, you just know when someone may be a little more standoffish or there's some walls and stuff. When there's competition. Yeah. Yes. Yes. And it's like, no, you're so down. I'm like, I'm so down. Great. We're both down. Okay, let's do it. And I love to that. Like, and I was actually thinking about the same thing with my friend, Alicia. It's like, we're competitive athletes, but we're not competitive with each other. And it's so refreshing to be around strong, independent. Confident, freaking women who are not threatened by each other. I think that that's actually where the most successful women come in is when they understand that there is room at the table and that you don't have to compete against one another. I think it just actually brings you down. Like collaboration, I think is the most important thing, even in an individual sport, whatever. I just think like, how are you going to grow by yourself? You know, like why not root? Why, why not root for them? Why not root for like, I don't understand the hurt in that, but that's just me. And I like. No offense to my producer, Wes. The real competitor is men. Like we're out here all fighting for the same spot in female sports. Yes. Why would we not uplift one another? I agree. It's already hard enough. We're already put against a wall. And so, yeah, I think to break that glass ceiling, like we all need each other. I agree. And I do see a trend in a positive direction, but I do think like women like you who have a platform, who speak your mind and you're authentic to who you are, like you're going to continue to inspire so many women. Thank you. To do that, you know. Thank you. Yeah. And the next generation. I mean, likewise. Same to you. Yes. Thank you. Yeah. I love using my platform for good. It's so fun. I get it. Yeah. Same. I love it. Well, I want to start from kind of the beginning, but more so like college because you went to Cal State Fullerton and you're from L.A. And not originally. I was born in Illinois. So I just say Chicago to make it easier. I'm from Chicago. And then I moved out to California when I was like a young teen. Because I needed to be able to train all year round. You can't really train in golf when you have four different seasons like you can't train in winter and you only have like seven good months or eight good months out of the year. And there was no top golf and all this like technology back then. And so my family and I relocated to California so we can train all year round. For your golf career. For my golf career. Yeah. This is a big move for them. And they did. They wanted to. We have family in California. So there was like a few reasons, but it was really more so for my career and they both also loved California. And so that was, yeah, that was where it began. So not originally from Illinois, but, you know, when I got to California, I was like, oh, I think I want to stay in California for school because I had offers from other places. And I was like, oh, do I want to go back to Illinois? I'm getting some offers from University of Illinois and whatever. And I was like, no, I think I really like it in California if I can control it. So. So cool. Yeah. And you're one of three kids. Well, yes, it's Filipinos are so complicated. Yes. So one of three. But then I have an adopted sister and I have a half brother. So technically there's five of us. Yeah. And so I was an only child for 10 years. I'm the eldest. OK. Yeah. And then so I'm 32. And then there's. Well, he just turned 23, 19. I didn't know you had a 10 year age gap. Yes. Yeah. And then did you did you you met my little sis? Yeah. She was on. Yeah. Yes. OK. Yeah. So she's 28. She's 25. OK. Yeah. And she just came into my life like when she she was a young teen, too. She was 15. And I was. I was in your family, adopted her. Yeah. I basically took her in. Yeah. Wow. Yeah. I was wondering what the dynamic was with that, because I thought you guys were related, related, like blood related, because you look just like her. I mean, yeah, you guys are so cute. You also have like your own little sister. We do. We have a little sister account. Yeah. It's really cute. Yeah. We're like opposite, but very similar. And it's just interesting. She's like, I'm the athletic one. And she is the singer. She's like very musically oriented. But we both love to dance. And she was like a Disney star. And and so she she has. Gone through a lot in her life. And so basically we took her in and we're like, OK, there's a lot of scar tissue here. Let's just like let's like nurse you back to life kind of thing. And so I took it upon myself to be like a big sister to her and like be a constant, like be a consistent in her life. And so. I love that. Yeah. No, she's great. I love my family. We're just one big happy family. I want a big family because I have a big family. And it works. It works. It works. I mean, getting to see the dynamic firsthand was so special. I mean, so just to give people some context. We she invited me to model her brand all in. Yeah. And I got to go on set at her house at her home, which is like it also just hit so different for me because it was like this could be my life in the next five to 10 years, you know, like hosting shoots at the house for your brand. And like you just see a girl like a girl boss close up and you just see where the potential is in yourself. It's just a really cool moment. But to see how beautifully you guys all worked in cohesion. Like, yes, of course, you're a girl boss in the center and you have people orbiting around you. But the like love and respect and joy to work together is so cool and unique. And I truly believe like you do a great job of orchestrating everything. So that was really cool to see up close and to be a part of. So, yes, I will say like, again, like you were you were so game. I was like, do you want to be a model? Like, why not? And I do take a lot of pride in like whenever I do get to conduction. It's like, obviously, I don't have like this 10, 15, 20 K budget. Right. Like I asked all my girlfriends, what's up? I asked my family to come through and I feel like it actually makes it such a big community builder. And anytime I've had a shoot, I love when I go online and I'm like, oh, my God, it's my girl M and my girl Gracie. They're connected. They're going to go play golf. You know, and I'm just like, oh, it's because we were able to make that environment happen. And I think also it being at my home makes it that way. Yeah. And sometimes I actually get like really in my head because I'm like, like, it's just a it's just a garage shoot. You know, I just bought a backdrop and it's I happen to have a green in my backyard. And it's like, I don't have like what these big brands have. But then I look at the people that I have and I'm like, that's what like that means so much more. That's like people know that like the people around me, like they're my tribe and I will back them as hard as they back me. And I think that's really what makes that's what that's what makes a brand. That's what makes a community. That's what makes a creator. That's what makes a successful person, I believe. 100%. And I think you having your platform to be able to welcome people into the behind the scenes and give them an inside look into the grit and the grind and like the not so pretty parts, I think is what makes it so endearing. Yeah. Because a lot of brands aren't doing that. I agree. And it kind of humanizes you. It builds this really sweet, intimate moment for your viewers and your audience and your customers to see all of the stuff that goes into something. And I truly believe like the artists and the musicians and the people that pull back that curtain and show kind of how the sausage is made. Yeah. It people are going to be more invested in it. I agree. I feel like when it comes to like branding in general, I think that showing the BTS is the only thing that actually makes you different now. And having like a human behind a brand is what makes you different as well. It's like, look at these big corporate brands that we used to dream or a dream of working with. It's like I, I personally, because I own a brand. Now I don't feel as connected to them. Like I understand what they stand for, but it's really different when you feel connected to like the owner or the founder of the brand and for me whenever when I started creating my brand it was like I need to stand up for everything that I didn't have growing up and so that and so that's kind of like whenever I feel lost I'm like what am I even doing like what am I even standing for I don't even have the budget or I get in my head I'm like okay at the end of the day has there ever been a professional golfer that's made their own brand no okay is there anyone that's a part of the AAPI community gay community all the stuff that I stand for no and I'm like okay if I if I positively impact one person in creating this brand or they wear my fits and they feel like I am seen yeah I could fail tomorrow yeah but I feel but you've won so content yeah yeah exactly that's beautiful yeah yeah I think that's what truly sets you apart in this very competitive world very competitive of you know entrepreneurship and business and especially clothing clothing is not easy I give you your flowers girl because that is freaking grind it's like I chose a path of most you're like I could have done damn golf balls but instead I did clothing one object and I chose you know let's make a new collection every you know every season and just like burn your brain but it's fine yeah I love this for me what did you study in school I'm a broadcast journalist really yeah so broadcast journalist I want to guess business yeah you're just a business girl yeah I am a business girly I think I always had kind of like an entrepreneur mindset and I think like when you're a creative it's really it's easier to go that route because when you're a dreamer you can dream big and then you're like oh I have all these business ideas and then it's all about just executing but I was just like a professional yapper that's that's been it and I knew like when I graduated I was like okay am I going to pursue professional golf I should because I did it my whole life it was kind of one of those things where I wasn't sure but like my family had sacrificed so much I was so much in my life and I was like I'm going to pursue professional golf and I'm like it would be it would be a disservice to me like looking back and being like I didn't try I did it and I just kind of like talked my way and made so much connections through my professional golf journey and I think that's what it was meant to be like I did well like I was a top uh mini tour player I got my Symmetra tour card I got all this stuff and in the end though it was like it wasn't even about my game it was just about meeting all these people along the way and all the girls that I played professionally with are either on tour now or like I work with them or I bring them in in some way and I'm like and I think that's yeah and I'm like I think that's just I think that was my purpose like I did my best in the professional journey and then when I transitioned into you know social media and stuff I was like oh well broadcast fits like in this right and I don't have to be so like perfect you know yeah I can be if I have to be but like this is even better like this is way more fun yes no literally yeah I think what's so cool is that everything kind of set you up for what you're doing now and you just utilize the space you utilize the moment you took advantage of the moment of when you got to enter into those rooms with really important people and you have the best personality for networking like you like you're so lovable and so easy to talk to so it's like thank you so it's like it's not a shock that you were able to enter these rooms confidently and hold your own with these very successful and wealthy people especially men I feel like yes that's not an easy feat how was it growing up in a sport that's male dominated it's it's really interesting and it's tough but you know at the same time it's all I know so because I grew up in it in a culture where I was like six seven eight years old going to tournaments and I'd be training and the only people around me were like older white males and you just kind of had to learn how to be this version of yourself that was more mature. Like I remember being seven and thinking I was like 21 because that's how I had to talk to these people right and there were times where I felt like at a very young age I'd be like talked down on by these adults and I'm like okay well I'm going to stand different I'm going to act different I'm going to talk different so I was raised in a culture where I just chose to step up but I understand that that's not how everyone thinks like let's say if they're newer to golf they're like whoa this is scary I don't know any different because all I have ever been in is grown into a male dominated sport. So I feel like I grew into thick skin I grew into talking back when I had to I grew into being smarter being tougher being stronger being a better golfer so I guess to answer your question I I don't know any different but when I you know zoom out and I look at golf as a whole and I look at the struggles that other women face then I'm like okay I need to do my best to empower other women or anyone to have the mindset that I have in it because I I'm it's natural for me yeah and it's normal it's my normal and and when I go to the tea you know people get really nervous when other people sit and watch or like men are always watching girls like on the course right so like and they're analyzing their every move they're so critical and to be fair though it's not that common right to see a bunch of young females on the course so I get it when guys are there they're like oh my gosh like who is this like I want to see what's going on I have trained myself that I'm like when I feel people watching I'm like I'm going to wait and I'm going to wait for more people to come. And then I'm going to hit she's a performer and I do it so that it kind of trains me to handle more pressure when I am under pressure it's just like the way I've conditioned myself like my whole life and but I understand that like some girls like when they feel they're being watched they're like oh I'm intentionally not going to hit I don't I'm going to wait for them to pass me on the range and I'm like play small like just stand up to the pressure I'm like why not like everyone sucks so just do it yeah I just do with confidence no one's going to bother you if you do with confidence so yeah it's a really interesting position to be in I mean it's gymnastics is not it's not considered male dominated it's actually more woman dominated right it's very female dominated it's very female dominated but then it's like is is coaching and staff also pretty female dominant or like pretty mixed now it is okay with all the drama with like and all the trauma and all the bullshit that's happened with men being in those spaces like gosh right they've kind of done clean house I think a lot okay I think the majority of head coaches in NCAA gymnastics is women. I think there's only like one or two really truly that are head coaching positions yeah the rest are assistant coaches which I think is really really cool that the sport has protected the women but I mean to be fair there's also still women out there that are toxic and you know true doing not great things but I think at the end of the day yes it's very much a female empowering sport and we've done a really good job of vetting the men yeah to be nurturing and loving like I think the men step into those spaces and they feel like they have to be a certain way which is really cool like they know that they have to be softer they have to be more understanding they have to be empathetic they have to know you know okay she's moody today like how do I approach this you know it's actually really funny which is really cool interesting yeah I guess like there that I guess it's a pretty big difference like between golf it's so different gymnastics and in that way but like your guys a sport is like so like you have to be so tough that I feel like you guys can handle anything like you have the most physical sport it's possible I'm like I'm just here swinging a club like you're over here like you could break your body any second like you could have like the yips or whatever you call it and you're like oh I just fly off the bar no literally yeah basically that's exactly how it goes that's terrifying yeah which I've tried so it's I can confirm it's very scary to be on any like a beam or a bar and yeah I'm not meant to be there yeah our sport swap was iconic it was it was very scary although I do I feel obsessed at the same time I'm like I'm just waiting for you to text me and be like do you want to just go to the free gym and you want to flip around I'll be like yeah no literally literally she it was probably one of the most like beautiful moments for me as a coach and someone who's worked with a lot of athletes like you literally came up to me and you were like and also I think altered my perspective on my sport I've been pulled in a lot of different directions in the last year and unfortunately like when you are building a business you are launching a podcast you are doing things outside of the gym yeah it pulls you away from the gym and so it's really hard to kind of reinvest that passion back into your sport and so when you told me that this was the most fun you'd had in like 10 15 20 years yeah you were like you get to be a kid every day yeah and I was like you're so right and I like I truly mean that like I when people are like like what's something exciting you did I was like oh no idea I like met my new best friend and I I was flipping around like I couldn't move the next day but it was so much like legit Gracie it was so much fun it was so like it's so exhilarating and you just have like no control but like you have no choice but to let go yeah and I think golf like you have to be so mature you know like at all times like you get to be a grown-up kid and I have to be a kid that had to grow up and and that was my life and then when I step into work mode I'm I'm I'm like you know I have to lead these women I have to be strong because it's a male-dominated sport and like it was like the one time I like got to be like oh my god look the floor is all bouncy and yeah and you get to be silly goofy and like it doesn't matter how I look because I'm like who the heck is gonna look good doing this for the first try no no one looks like and I think like that is so crazy to me that you've had to basically worry about the perception yes of you you are so self-aware of how you're being perceived that young and how you're being judged at a young age how do you think that kind of altered your personality or maybe shaped who you are today i mean i'm very grateful for golf in the sense that it allowed me to be aware it allowed me to be able to walk into these really intimidating rooms and feel like i can own this space because i've been talking this talk since i was seven years old like legitimately right like so in in that way it's it's pretty cool but i think that that downfall is that i don't feel like i really got to have a childhood but then i feel like a lot of athletes go through that too right because you you you get into a competitive sport this is your life and then your world is what your arena is like all i know everyone's like oh my god it's so cool you get to travel the world and play golf i'm like yes and i don't take that for granted but i wake up and i'm just on a different plot of grass yeah at some point you know and so i i again really grateful for golf and it has molded me into the person that i am i think it's molded me into the entrepreneur that i am i think it's molded me into a fantastic broadcaster and speaker and it's developed my language in ways that i know i couldn't have just based on school and education you can speak in a man's world yeah i can being in a man's world is very and it's common it's so exactly and and so i have that to thank but i am i'm now 32 and i am constantly working with my therapist and psychologist how to be a kid again because i never got to be that you know and so so i'm working backwards as i get older but i think i think it's more fun that way because it's like oh i'm older and i make more money and now i get to go have fun but yeah it's interesting that i never got to be a kid when i was a kid wow yeah i mean i guess i can definitely relate to that because even though yes i'm like playing around jumping in the pit doing my sport and because my sport obviously does bring out like childlike um personality it's definitely still yeah i i made a lot of sacrifices yes at the time i didn't think they were sacrifices i just was like but i loved gymnastics is what i want to do right and so yeah looking back i mean i don't think i've ever told you this but that's why i started sports swap really yeah because i was craving healing parts of my inner child that didn't get to play as a kid because i was literally just had goosebumps so you could probably see that i love that for you i think all athletes like we fight for that and especially when you're in i mean a team sport but it's individual what do you what do you consider individual right yeah and i think when you're raised in a sport that's individual like tennis golf you know gymnastics you do get a little robbed of your childhood and you go through an identity crisis when you step away from it and there is no camaraderie like you know ally riley is our friend right yeah and she gets to when she's down and out like she has her teammates to like lift her up like we didn't you know like we do but we don't like i mean my best friends were definitely in the gym yeah but like you're not there's a massive difference between working together as a team to get to a common goal yeah and then competing against one another yeah and i think what sucks like looking back now as an adult looking back on my childhood my my high school career like there are a lot of friendships that don't exist anymore because i think it was rooted in competition yeah and so when you start doing well you start to notice the support isn't there yeah or the friendships aren't there and it's it's really devastating it's really unfortunate and i'm curious did you notice that when you started kind of growing into the woman that you are and and building your brand and becoming successful and blowing up on the internet like did you lose friendships along the way yeah oh yeah and it was very eye-opening and i'm sure you went through this too when you transitioned out of competitive gymnastics into social media right it's a really unique thing and i think it's a really unique thing and i think it's a really unique space because you're raised to be the best athlete possible and like i'm sure the same way your coaches reply like okay your your ability needs to outmatch anything else so that was me and it was like social media blew up in in golf and then for me it was like okay my ability still has to be so much better i can't fall into this like narrative of like social media being um there was like hot chicks basically golfing right and so i had to kind of like stay stay true to what i was doing and i was like wait i lost my train of thought bring what was the question bring me back how'd you deal with losing friends okay yeah there we go okay i was like wait i need to land this plane i'm like i'm soaring into the wrong the wrong place okay so when i transitioned into social media but i wanted to use it as a vehicle to help me get sponsors and to help me get eyes because golf is self-funded right so you have to pay for your own not for the men right now they're they're in a much better place they're fine they're doing just fine so for but for me especially because when i played pro that was almost 10 years ago now um you had to fund your travel your caddies your i mean it goes for any pro man man or woman but there's just there was far less support for women i had to do anything to get the attention and that's what i used social media for when i started posting more on social media the amount of judgment i got from my peers from my teammates from from my high school mates from my friends you know and it was hard because you you care about what they think and you think that they're your true friends right and then and then you start seeing it's so funny like and i'm sure you notice this too it's like oh wow more strangers are supporting me than like my own friends you know they're scrolling past and i'm like yeah sure it seems so shallow and i've confronted friends before about and they're like why do you need my like why do you need my comment and i'm like because i do that for you because i do that for you it needs to be reciprocated it needs to be reciprocated and now especially speaking in current time like social media is a now right so like why would i not do that to you the friends that aren't liking the things yeah are the ones who see it behind the scenes all the work and time and effort that you're putting in to even produce this content right you know how much work goes in behind the scenes yeah you've seen it firsthand and you won't even send a little like yeah you won't even comment something you can really comment a heart yeah do you know how much that means to people especially who like me love words of affirmation and need validation for my hard work because i grew up with a coach yeah and i grew up being judged my whole life like yes i know i probably should work through that in therapy but also it means the world like i think when you are in the creative space and you see other fellow creators creating it's like i why would i not comment especially on like a brand deal when i know how hard it is to negotiate and we know that those don't get that much impression all the time i'm like yeah girl get it and there's nothing more stressful than when a brand pays you to produce a piece of content and you work your ass off to do it and you go through edits and you go through all of these trials and errors to make this piece of content and no one sees the behind the scenes and then you just you're like please someone comment i know like it like i want the brand to know that they invested in the right person you know for sure and yeah i think it's it's definitely a very inch i never really thought of it like that until you said that but yeah that's where my mind went when you asked the question like i'm like so in short yes i have maybe not necessarily lost friends but i have just tiered people differently in my life because i'm like if you support me and you love me then you love me through every stage of my growth yes and there are people who i know are watching there are people who are who i know are probably hoping i fail there are people i know who are probably waiting to see what level i get to before they maybe compliment me and then there are people who are just there through every rise and crash of mine yeah and those are the people that i welcome into my home those are the people that i vent to and everything and those are the people that like really see me for who i am because like this shit isn't easy no like whether it's a professional athlete retired you're going into creating or whatever like entrepreneurship yeah building a brand it's fucking hard and it break it breaks you like anything where you're having to be creative for a living it breaks you and and it's personal it's personal and it hurts when you feel people pull away or a partner that doesn't support you you know that's a that's a bare fucking minimum i know define have a partner that supports you in this like period you're literally a team like Like literally throw the heart. Is that so hard? Type the heart. It takes two seconds. Literally like no time at all. Yeah. I just, I know it's so devastating, but at the same time, it's like, I would rather you show me your true colors. True. Then take advantage of me when I'm at the top. That's true. That is true. You know what I mean? Yeah. I'd rather, I've, I heard this one saying that really changed my perspective on it when it came to like growing into this new phase of my life and entering into a new era. It was like, I would rather be in a room full of five people who clap and scream their heads off than be in a room of a million who won't clap once. Absolutely. Oh, I'm so for that. I'm like, yes. I'm so for that. I would rather have diehard besties in my corner than like a million friends who I feel like are talking shit behind my back. Oh, absolutely. Absolutely. It's so stressful. No. I'm, I'm, I'm about that too. And I, I feel like, like for me, like in, in this process of like, you know, I've been doing the creating for 10 years. I've been golfing for 28. Jesus Christ. That's period. You've been golfing for the same amount that I've been alive. I have. I'm turning 28. Yeah. I started when I was three. So yeah. I just turned 28. Yeah. Yes, you did. Yes. Happy birthday. Thank you. And I, I think, um, you know, I have, I've had people ask me. Like, you know, what's it like going through this and growing through your success and seeing people kind of come in and out of your life. And. I very much like there's been a lot of pain in that because I'm I I'm such a lover with friends and everything like I want everyone to win but then not everyone has that mindset but for me I've just kind of like learned to like love everyone through whatever however they feel towards me I just like love them through it yeah and and if they come back into my life that's great I just again I just hear them where I feel fit but it's like you just set boundaries you just set boundaries you're like I'm not gonna go above and beyond to be your friend or I'm not gonna chase your validation that's the hardest thing for me I understand because I like being liked by my friends I don't really care too much by strangers but like I really care about my friends yeah and when I feel like someone's pulling away like I have this I think instinctual almost like maybe my competitive brain is like wait wait wait like let me prove to you yes that I'm worthy of your attention and your love yeah I did that with my ex and I'm like I'm not doing that anymore but then I noticed I was doing with friends I'm like oh I'm not doing with men now but I'm doing it with friends yeah and I feel like I'm chasing their validation I'm chasing their friendship yeah and I'm putting in so much effort and I'm putting in so much love into something that like isn't being reciprocated and I'm like what the fuck am I doing right this is such a waste of time I could be taking this energy and this love and pouring it into the people that are actually showing it back to me yeah like why am I wasting my time I agree what and also where where is this like am I just like afraid of someone not liking me like come on we gotta dig a little deeper like it is not that deep like sometimes you just grow out of friendships and honestly sometimes people are just like not rooting for you no exactly and you don't need them in your corner yeah yeah which is unfortunate but also like it is what it is it is what it is if you feel threatened by me and my success like I I urge you to go figure out yeah why right you know what's so funny is like because I know I I mean I know we haven't known each other a very long time but I know that you're the same way it's like if you were in my orbit you would understand that you would grow with me yes like I would take you with me any opportunity I would take you with me if you wanted to be in my circle but because you think of me otherwise you're actually letting yourself down by not allowing this connection to happen and I'm not going to force that yeah you don't want to be a part of this circle you want to grow with me that's fine but everyone else who's in it we're going to like all come together and I'm not going to force that yeah I'm not going to together yes yeah oh I love that I and you can tell that with you and your brand and just how you've built your business I think it's really admirable to see you create such an incredible ecosystem around you that I mean also helps perpetuate joy and passion in the workplace for you like how have you maintained this love for what you do and this creative job oh gosh it's hard that's a great question it it it is so hard right and and if I was let's say creating like how I created 10 years ago like what I do now I wouldn't even that wouldn't even be in it right because what was cool back then is not what's cool now and we're not dancing on tiktok anymore I mean I still like we still dance a little bit I still lip sync and dance you know we have a little fun with it we do a few trends yeah it's it's fun when you get to be unserious but it you have to you have to like change you have to be able to have to be okay with change in this world and I've always been okay with change I'm actually I get really unsettled when I feel like I'm stagnant and so I think that's good for me in my mindset and in this career like always wanting to level up I suppose but yeah it's it is tough because my relationship with golf golf is such a mental game as it is I'm sure gymnastics is very much the same and I have to constantly fall in love with golf over and over and over again um and like for me like let's say creating this clothing brand has helped me fall in love with golf in a different way and so I've had to find different meanings to golf like when I hated golf I started to fall in love with instruction in golf and getting women into golf and and understanding how do I teach a beginner something that I just like was born with right like I knew how to hold the club before I could even I can't even think and I'm like how do I actually talk about this in such a way where someone that's like five can understand and I started to fall in love with that so at every stage in my career and as a golfer I've had to find ways to just fall in love with it and that's that goes along with creating too I had to find ways to fall in love with it like when the tiktok era started I had to find ways to just fall in love with it like when the tiktok era blew up oh I was so obsessed I loved it I love short form I love like quick like oh my god it's great for ADHD and then you just yeah it's like fun and then and then you see a shift and then you're like crap like now what I like is not what's in what can I do that's still authentic to me but perform well and like it's this weird like ecosystem where it's like I need to be viral but I don't but then I don't want to be different like than what I stand for it's it's complicated but you're constantly having to adjust but I can adapt yes you have to adapt but the one thing that's really helped me stay in love and fall in love in all the different realms of my life is I have multiple pillars of things that I do right like the golf is one thing the brand is one thing I used to be a golf trainer that was another thing the dancing the family aspect I have multiple pillars that like when I feel so sick of one yeah I focus on another and that's kind of how I've stayed alive and when people just focus so hard on like one little thing and then social media trends change or whatever what's in changes and it doesn't match what you do I think that's when it gets really hard so your world literally comes crashing down like you need to be a multi-hyphenate you need to have other things that you enjoy and make it pillars so that like okay that's not doing well well I got a podcast okay yes you know oh well podcasting is not in right now I got a youtube you know you gotta have to you have to have different things so that you can constantly fall in love with the things that are you know you just have more things to fall in love with I have noticed that in building out the podcast is like thank god I'm not just a podcaster because I would crash the hell out if I'm like every day just checking analytics and I'm like I didn't get very many views yeah everything's fine like I think I would crash out and I think because I have so many other things going on and to distract me yes I and I have other things that give me fulfillment that give me purpose when things aren't going right in one facet like you said it's so much easier to have kind of like the memory of a goldfish and just shift yes pivot okay cool that's not working today no worries we can like strategize on how to make it better but also I'm not putting all of my worth into that one thing exactly and like that has helped me a lot with gymnastics as well like I notice my gymnastics has gotten better since not since de-centering it from my life yes is that crazy yeah same I mean it sounds crazy because I think you and I both have the same sport where it's like it is the center of your universe and it's like it's like it's everything it's you it's your whole personality you are a gymnast you are a golfer so to make it de-centered and to kind of put it to the side and put it in maybe a little box for a minute like and then go back to it like yeah it you do have a different perspective on it you have a different approach to it you have a different passion behind it but you also just have like yeah I don't know like a different appreciation and love that kind of gets unlocked because now you get to do it right you when your life is chaotic your life is busy and then you finally get into the gym you finally get on the course it's like oh this is my therapy yeah like I don't know it's just I've noticed a huge shift in that and I never thought in a million years I would be falling back in love with gymnastics I love that for you because I was just like oh is this it like yeah is my podcast kind of my way of shifting out and gradually leaving the sport and giving me something to do outside of my I think building out my identity and giving myself more hobbies and passions that fill my cup like has helped me fall back in love with the things that really started at all yeah I get that I mean I think at the end of the day it's like our sport with where we are now it's not life and death anymore yeah and I think that's what makes you fall in love with it and it's not the only thing paying my bills right you know and I think that's what makes it tough it's like when we're growing up like because how old were you when you started gymnastics six okay yeah so it's like we're like six to thirteen and this is all we know it's kind of life and death you're just dropped off in your arena and you're like all right this is my day I just go and train every day single day and I gotta go get a full scholarship or I gotta go do this and now it's like you can look back at it because it isn't paying our bills it isn't life and death there are other things that we're allowed to do other things that make us happy now and I think it's just so wild it is interesting to fall in love with your sport like as an adult I know yeah when you were shifting into social media you obviously did a great job of building your pillars and did you always have that figured out like what was your goal with it when you first started in social media yeah no great question I think for me um when I transitioned into social media it was not on purpose at all and this is 2016 right this is kind of when Instagram was just becoming more mainstream like there was no word influencer there was no there okay if you posted yourself a lot on Instagram you were just narcissistic yeah it was like you weren't building a brand but my first post was like of a dog and a tutu I just was like oh my god I'm gonna do this like oh that's cute like what am I doing on this app like yeah it was it didn't mean anything and and so for me it was just a normal social thing kind of like Facebook and whatever else and sharing your life just sharing my life and and I would only share things like basically like oh I did well in a tournament or I you know I won a college event and it was just really just like highlights of my life at first and then when there was there was a another talent in my world and her name is Paige Renee I'm not sure I don't know if you're familiar so she's she's great and she we her name is Paige Renee I'm not sure I don't know if you're familiar so she's she's great and she's great competitive golf growing up together so I had always known that she had the chops like I know that she was a great golfer she played for SAIC i played for cassie fullerton she's like super hot like she has it all right she's an it girl she's an it girl and she kind of blew up in in the golf and social media world and when she blew up it took such a hit in negative and positive ways because she's a hot girl that's golfing right she was like a dream girl and she built her following she built her following yeah but it was an accident it wasn't like she went to do that she was just like oh my god look at this dream like hot girl golfing right and it's like every man's dream every man's dream and and she played into it like she is a lot more sexual when it comes to it but she owns it and it is what it is and for me that's her brand and to each their own and but i knew her growing up and my first professional golf event we played together and we had a three-day event i played with her for three days no one would go near her on the range they all the girls hated her because she was already kitted out she was sponsored by calloway she's this hot chick and really you know fresh clothes she's not wearing her college gear anymore we're all broke wearing our college gear still it's these tournaments trying to make it just trying to make it and i was like what the fuck i'll be nice to her because we grew up together so we would just play and i'd ask her questions and we would just caught up on life and she was like why don't you do the social media thing and i was like i don't i don't know what i'm like what am i gonna do wear makeup when i golf like i don't understand and she was like well you just never know who's gonna see you and i'm like you know what it altered my brain when she said that just such a small thing and i was like yeah fuck it why not so i started to play golf and i was like oh my god i'm gonna be nice to her and i was like oh my god sharing on social media and literally my only goal was if i could have one sponsor see my swing or see my result or see my game that you can't find on the internet just by googling me you can't get on tv yeah you can't get on because there was no tv yeah because i'm i'm like a tier one golfer right this is like minor minor leagues no one's looking at you so i was like well the only way to promote myself is me and my social media channel is like my own tv that people can log into so like hell yeah i'll do that and then i was like oh maybe i'll bounce the ball and then i found no one really knows how to bounce the ball and i'm like i thought all of us i thought this was a universe i thought we all grew up knowing it no okay you need to teach me this by the way i want to learn i can't believe we didn't do that yeah i know i want to learn bounce the ball hit it out the air she does like these really cool trick shots on her instagram you gotta go check it out they're so sick we'll put it in there she's literally like happy gilmore yes in the girl version and and so like i started posting these tricks popped off i'll do like dance trends and stuff it popped off and i'm like oh okay so having a personality and golf is good but you're also doing stuff that girls would want to watch too yeah you weren't just doing it for the male gaze correct i think that's the difference and that's why you've built such an incredible female audience yeah and it's such a great community because it's not just men sexualizing you right for sure for sure it's easy to fall into that yes i mean it's hot girls sport too yeah yes like i'm really impressed and that's why you stood out to me so much when we first started following each other was i was like mad respect to a girl who could easily easily wear the short skirts you know flash the mask yeah hit the ball and blow a kiss yeah but instead you did the hard thing yeah and you got creative and you got crafty and scrappy and you were just you built a brand that i would want to be associated with yeah and i think that's really cool because i'm very brand safe and i'm very clean and i feel like i understand that i it it always breaks my heart because i think sexualizing yourself is the easy way out i yeah and and i i definitely agree with that especially for us you know what yeah i mean you can you do like can you just respect the hell out of me for my sport yes i just want respect yes the shit is hard it's not just something to like gawk your eyes at because someone's ass is out right sorry we're not allowed to pick our wedgies and like that's so fuck off you know right so i loved that you've built your brand to have more of a foster community rather than just eyes on you thank you no i i definitely take i take pride in that and also i'm just someone that i was very much to be like oh your ability needs to outshine whatever you have and and if you can look good while doing it period of course yeah of course you'll get attention but i like i need to make sure that my ability is always going to be better than everyone else in the room and my personality is going to shine brighter than everyone else in the room and if i look good while doing it hell yeah yeah that's just icing on the cake yes exactly that's so cool what's been the biggest learning curve since launching your brand and your business and everything in alignment with golf gosh the biggest learning curve i think is that you you never you never stop learning you you literally never stop learning you never stop growing and you're still constantly challenging yourself in ways that you just wouldn't be able to challenge yourself if you weren't actually doing it yeah like golf is a sport like any other sport but golf is a sport that you think you can master but you never will right you can never master it you can never hit one of the most humbling sports it is very humbling and entrepreneurship is also very very humbling and you you learn that you are never going to really be an expert in what you do there's always room for improvement and there's always room to just become a better human as well to challenge yourself to humble yourself in different ways and i i'm someone that is very naturally i'd say like confident and it's just like innately in me to stand tall but golf and entrepreneurship building this brand has has really knocked me down in different ways it has challenged me in different ways it's taught me to be you know to be stronger mentally but it's actually taught me to be more understanding it's taught me to be more empathetic it's taught me it's kind of softened you a little yeah it has because it it it makes you it makes you feel so vulnerable and raw like when you aren't performing your best in your sport or when your business is down there is like you just feel like there is no more like like what like onion left to peel like you just suddenly you're just there and you're like wow this is i feel so low but then at the same time there's nowhere but up from here yeah and so you're just always always learning i do have to say though i agree with you but i think it's because it's who you are to your core that's why that you see growth in every opportunity because not everybody is gonna be where you are and be like oh but i can still keep growing because i mean technically the last 10 years like that you made it like that's what i made it no in my brain i'm like i can do so much more no girl you are you kidding i literally like i think after that shoot i went home and i beat myself up because i'm like i'm in this tiny one bedroom apartment what the fuck am i doing but also by the beach oh yeah okay we're on the beach we're like a walk away you can cry on the beach i actually did cry on the beach but i'm being real it wasn't just because of that but i think what it kind of spiraled into this thing of you're not doing enough you're not this you're not that you you know the comparison of just like why are you not here yet why are you not there it's just like you consistently putting yourself down because you want to be somewhere that you are not yet yeah and i think what sucks is like that's all fake yeah it's not not that like other people's success is fake or anything but it's like you're creating this narrative in your head yeah that like you'll be happy when yes and i'm like what am i telling myself i'm gonna be happy like bitch i'm happy now yeah i love my life that i've built now i'm so proud of everything i've done and yeah of course there's always growth but like how do you how do you manage the growth mindset but have it filtered to not be negative because that's something that i struggle with that's a really good that's a really good question and firstly because i'm a words of affirmation girly and so are you you are killing it thank you like you are you are and everything that you do and and you what's most important is that you're happy doing it right and and and that's all that's that matters at the end of the day it's also a reminder to me so i'm very much like you and that like i if i compare myself to someone it's never to let them down and be like jealous it's always because like why am i not there yet right and and and i can look up to someone and see that and be like well how come i'm not there yet or how come i don't have that yet or whatever and i i'm someone that likes to level up i would just like you you know we like to level up and i i fight that balance all the time yeah right i fight that balance all the time i i i be lying if i said i don't cry and i don't and i'm not in the same position as you i am all the time why why can i have the the bigger home why can i have investors why can i have all this why can't my life be at ease why can't like i can sit and be that and i have to constantly do what exactly you did and retrain myself and be like i honestly ask myself would baby tish be happy yeah yeah would baby tish be proud absolutely that's why my wallpaper is baby gracie because i'm like i need to remind myself actually brilliant yeah yeah you know what i shouldn't be kind to her yeah yes because like at the end of the day yeah have you seen that one social media trend it's like when you show like your baby version of yourself and then you show where you are now it's like it's like oh my gosh my i i might lose my brand tomorrow and then baby tish is like we have a brand yeah like how cool you know or or like or like oh we we like i don't know if i'm gonna get that gig wait i get to travel and play golf for a living like how fucking cool is that and like when you change that mindset it's like a fun fact if people don't know this when you're in a state of gratefulness you can't actually be anywhere else oh my god great why am i actually crying you guys i always cry i'm a person that cries when i see people cry that's empathy it's good yeah i'm on my period you guys okay relax me too oh we're cycle sisters love that for us i think what hit different was like it's just like whoa like that's so cool We're doing this. No, exactly. Can you even? imagine like like you can sit here and be like why am i not there but like little gracie is like sitting on a beam being like oh my god like look where gymnastics took me yeah and you can you can look at it from i'm not enough or you can look at it as like wow like you know how many people are sitting in a fucking cubicle hating their lives at a nine to five who had to retire their sport and they can't even go outside anymore like yeah we get to do this until we can't so we might as well make the fucking most of it while we can yeah and i think like having people like each other to hold each other accountable and check in i know life is crazy and life is busy but like even just sitting here in this interview with you it like reminds me i'm like yeah i should be so fucking proud of myself you should be i can lose everything tomorrow but like fuck i like little tish would be just so happy like we have a green in our backyard fuck yeah i get to have a place that i can host my family i've always dreamed of that i work so hard fuck yeah yeah you know and you did it all on your own i did that's the craziest i can say i did it all on your freaking i don't need a man no could be nice sometimes like if i could just like rent one because i don't go i don't swing that way i'm just lift some things for me yeah but i don't need no man i'm good we're independent queens out here well speaking of you did have a very public breakup i did recently how are you doing thank you i appreciate you i'm really bummed i wasn't here around for that because i could have given you a really really good hug it's okay you're here now you're here when it matters yeah yeah you know i actually really haven't talked about it all that much but i'm finally i think in a place where i can talk about it and and not be so emotional i'm also a very logical person so that's kind of what gets me through it and um it it's tough and i i very much empathize with anyone who becomes a social media couple or there are two personalities and you come together you co-brand without realizing it you just do it out of love and then it turns into oh crap it's a business i'm gonna i'm gonna delete this whole part of my life you know and it's it's very interesting i i brought my my ex fiance into my life and i really integrated her into everything that i had and you know i i believed in that moment that it was forever so i didn't think any harm would come but i don't know how to operate without being so totally honest like when i'm on social media i want to take pride in i am who i am i'm not someone who can necessarily hide my personal life because it's part of like what makes me who i am i'm such a lover and i'm like to hide the person i love just feels not true and i'm such a killer in the lgbtq plus space that it would be a disservice for me to not share the love that i truly felt and so i have to think of things in a very like grateful way but you know it hurts and it stings and i i just truthfully came back from a gig that was quite literally 10 miles away from where i know she's from i was 10 miles away from my dog that i'll never see again you know whoo not the dog not that's gonna send me whoo yeah um and and it's it's tough um i'm someone who also is very uh i think because i know my position in like the social media space and like being kind of like a beacon of like strength to a lot of people i i take that role very seriously when i when it first came out um and there were a lot of people already having a hunch that it was over before it was over that was the toughest part because i'm trying so hard to just own my craft work really hard in what i do i used work as my escape yeah and i was able to make some really creative and beautiful things i think through the pain and i was able to use it in a way that i think was you know empowering but when people are constantly badgering you like what where are they what's going on what's wrong where is so and so that was the worst part too yeah i'm like like you're not together on the holidays and i'm like well no one's and no one's badgering them right they're only badgering you because you're the public figure and everyone's commenting where is this person where's this person yes did you guys break up and you're like fuck dude i'm just trying to work yeah and i'm not i'm grieving you know and god breakups during the holidays are the fucking worst you know especially when you guys were engaged yeah we were engaged and and you know i i look at that period still like very grateful and i i meant every sorry i'm i really loved her yeah you know it's tough to cry in camera i feel like i've trained myself not to but no you're doing so well i think this is so fucking relatable it's tough you know and like i can sit here and when it first ended up i was telling myself like i'm never gonna date someone who's in the public eye or i'm never gonna post i'm like fuck that fuck this and it's like i think that i i i do if i love anything about myself i love my heart because i know that at the end of the day i'll never be that i'm always gonna be very open with who i love no matter how much it hurts me and um it's the toughest part is when you want to grieve and people don't give you the space to do that yeah and i had to really like dig myself or like i had to put like walls up and like put myself in a hole and and and i literally went publicly on my stories and i said if you love me don't reach out to me yeah give me a moment and i'm someone who loves community you know this i'm someone who needs people around me and and i i know i i was going to reach out to everyone in my life to help me pick me up but i wasn't there yet i was like give me the space to to accept that this is my new reality like my world just got flipped upside down i had the most public engagement it went so fucking viral and and that was not ever the obviously it's not the purpose it just was such a beautiful moment people could see the love yes and and i still look back at that moment as still the happiest day of my life and i i can't really watch it now it still hurts but it was the happiest day of my life um you know being down on my knee and i hope one day that i can do that again um i still believe it's there but it's hard and the only and i'm a very black and white person so the only way i got through it was a cold cut i just i had to cleanse myself from seeing it same cleanse myself from my own gallery cleanse myself from my own social media you know block anything that made me yeah and it's like you just had to like do this like 30-day cleanse and you're in survival mode and it got me through though yeah it actually got me through um and i'm now in a place where i'm okay with meeting other people you know i'm okay with i'm just okay and and it's actually been a gift in the sense of you know nurturing my friendships and relationships making new connections like this and it's i just i don't wish this upon anyone this is a part of our life that it's really hard to explain like when you're an influencer personality famous whatever it is this is the part that's hard people are like how's dating for you you must get you know dms and all that stuff all the time or whatever i'm like no it's hard it's hard and things like this public breakups make it so so so hard yeah yeah i mean i can totally relate yeah i i think what people don't understand is or i think what's really cool about you is i can already tell that you didn't bring that person to the public eye because it was strategic because you wanted to bring them into the brand because you wanted to build this empire like you did it because you just loved them yes and you post what you love and you live authentically and you are who you are and i think no one should ever dog you for putting your life online or putting your love online yeah but it i don't think people talk about it enough the pain and suffering that comes from the aftermath yeah i i will say though that like publicly have you gone through a public breakup yeah my last one was like i mean it was like semi-public like i posted him a decent amount but like i only like when i posted him it went viral because people love couples and yeah yeah people were saying that we were soulmates before i even thought we were soulmates and so was he already kind of like a a public figure or like when okay it's like you kind of brought him in and then became okay okay that makes sense so he was like yeah it's very much not online yeah yeah yeah anytime i posted him was like when he posted gotcha okay yeah so that makes sense so so somewhat similar and and um for mine it i think it became bigger than i anticipated it to be by no means were we like super huge as a couple but we were very notable because we were two feminine women that are together i i've always been very attracted to feminine women that's we look like we're both basically straight facing and then we're together so that brought a lot of attention um and i will say though that through the break i've been very attracted to women and i've been very attracted to that the comments were actually still very endearing like it wasn't hate which was good you know i think there was you know there were some people that were like oh my god i bet i bet this happened and this happened and they're all making speculation and i had to i had to like you know block keywords for a long time i was like oh god but for the most part a lot of the comments were like oh like i really believed in you too or like oh i hope you're okay and and i'm glad that that was my side of the coin as opposed to like fuck that hoe you know like yeah oh you're a you know i can imagine the the public backlash that some couples would get and like completely misconstrue them and that would just create some narrative and run with it oh my god that would murder me if someone was like oh tish is a cheater i mean i don't think anyone would ever think that of me because that's just not who i am but like if someone were to make something and ran with it yeah that would break it's out of your control you can't do anything about it that would be break my heart people i feel like have this mob mentality now where it's like yes they hear one story they don't even try to hear the other side and they just run with it and it's like oh that makes sense and then their head they're like well that's the truth yes like whoa yeah there's so many things that could have happened and you need to have empathy yes and i mean yeah they're thankfully i had a very similar experience as you where it was thank god we built communities that actually love and support us yeah and know that we're human beings and that we are just girls at the end of the day and we're fucking going through it and we just we love hard and we love real and i mean shit i thought i was gonna get married too the fuck like god and so like it hits different and i think when everyone's bought into this narrative that like they're your person and you're bought into this narrative that they're your person it just it's it's a really really tough loss and i will say there was one comment that fucking made me spiral one day like i don't typically like i'll read all my comments i respond to everybody like i love building my community giving back to people that show me love and everything so like i do read my comments and thankfully 99 are all really really positive and i remember like this man once commented on my post when i i finally publicly said like we're not together anymore and he just wrote well she probably cheated on him and left him because he's a nobody and she's famous dude fuck that i'm like i wish i could have just been like you guys don't know this but like he broke up with me oh like he left me like i am yeah i would have literally married the man like i was so bought in my rose colored glasses were so strong i was like this is end all be all i was devoted and i am the most loyal human when i'm in i'm in 100 i feel that and so i think that was the most hurtful because i was so scared that that narrative would take off and i'm like i mean i know to my core that no one would actually believe that if they knew me yeah but it's just like with the internet you never know no exactly and i think i i mean it's such a hit to you because you know that's not your character no and it's like wow you follow me and you you're brave enough like do you even do you even follow me yeah like that that's not usually yeah no they don't but i understand like i you know through it there has been some you know 90 positive maybe 10 negative and and being a part of the lgbtq plus community like the amount of comments that i got that were well you know lesbian relationships always fail oh my god that like the highest creating this highest divorce rate ma knew knew you guys wouldn't make it you just haven't had the right guy yet i guess lack of better words you know and when i get those comments they were just saying you just need to be straight mm-hmm yeah you haven't had the right penis yet or something i get that all the time all the time and it it really hurts because my coming out experience was not easy yeah and so it like to when did you come out i came out in 2019 but i i realized not yeah not not that long ago and um i realized my sexuality 2016 so 10 years ago now yeah we're about to approach it actually yeah congratulations yeah thank you and you know realizing your sexuality is not a you wake up and you realize it you know you constantly challenge yourself because of societal norms your upbringing culture all this stuff and i had everything against me so when i have these comments that say you know the divorce rate is so high you never stood a chance like two women just never worked to like the too dramatic or you haven't had the right dick yet or whatever like babe your homophobia is showing yeah oh yeah and it's also like i would be lying if i said those comments i would be lying if i said those comments i would be lying if i said those comments i would be lying if i said those comments didn't hurt because i'm like you have no idea what i went through to even realize what i like yeah you know like you don't think i tried yeah you don't think i wanted the i chose the path of most resistance once again yeah you know or i don't know it's hard both ways apparently but it sucked and and so those those comments really did break me down like of course i never wanted to fail of course of course i believed in forever you know and and to be so for real too like my my ex was a little more public about the breakup than i was i think silence is speaks volumes and that's kind of the high road that i tried to take i if i had the choice to never say anything i would have but i was getting asked so many questions every single day that i it takes me a lot to get anxious and it takes me a lot to be really overwhelmed i can handle a lot of pressure compared to others um but that was really like bursting me like i was breaking i was i had never seen myself break so much you know like work can break me but when it's my personal life that is a different kind of break and when she was speaking out more on it then then i was like oh my god i'm gonna break then i could bear it was really overwhelming that i had to say something and i hated that i had to be in that position and so that's the only thing that i would say is really hard to just overcome when you have you have no control over what the other person does you know when it's a it's a it's a breakup and people know the both of you and that they're no longer a part of you that you can't control you can't control what they do and that's the hardest part i think the tough thing is too is you don't want to welcome comments because you don't want to talk about it because you're still grieving you're still going through it all of it but then you're also like i need these comments to stop yeah so let me just identify the freaking elephant in the room now yeah and finally just say my piece and then we can just close that door and close that chapter and i remember doing that because there were so many people dming me commenting on my stuff being like where is he what's going on why are you guys not together why haven't i seen him in your videos and um was he in your world or did you bring him into your world he was a fireman oh very much not in my world okay yeah and um the worst and what really was like the breaking point was i i would get dms from other women saying hey he's on a dating app and thinking that they're like sending me the hey girly text you know where they're like hey he you know reached out to me on whatever and that's fine you're single you can do your thing like i'm not you do your thing i needed i needed to heal i could not get back on i couldn't get on the apps period but like that was the most hurtful one because there wasn't a lot of time that had passed but also because girls are telling me like hey like i want to date your man you know and like fuck just weird shit like that and i'm like i don't know what you're getting out of this yeah like that's that's a nuance i need this to end yeah that's that's a nuance of being public that you just it like maybe it'll bother us in the moment and then it it you know it goes over our head the next day but these are things that people who don't have a following or they're not their life isn't out there don't ever have to face yeah you know you can go through a heartbreak and no one has to know and yeah i guess i i overlooked those comments i like it hurts me in the moment then i'm like okay move on but like imagine a lot of that stacked up oh it was raw yeah yeah it triggered for sure yeah it's tough yeah like like i mean being a girl's girl i'm like why would you why would you do that yeah that why yeah like just to like rub in my face that you're gonna go on a date with a man that's not mine anymore like okay for sure like also have him it like yeah once we broke up like i'm like i'm good yeah like the rose-colored glasses came off like i'm i deserved better like we're good right i mean like very similar to you my so she walked away from me yeah and and that was a perception that i didn't care to share but then you know people started having all these assumptions and i'm just like yeah i'm like oh and i i don't know if i said it somewhere or someone maybe a friend of mine commented saying like it wasn't even my decision and it's just like these things these things hurt i think i've had a few dms saying like yeah she's definitely left you for a man and i'm like oh my god it's like oh i can't like like you don't think i'm down like yeah let's just kick her while she's down kick me while i'm down this is like i'm a strong person but let's push it to a breaking point that's tough yeah it's i mean i can't even tell you how much thicker skin i have i'm sure you must feel the same way at the same time and it's really easy to put your walls up now that this is a situation and it just it's just kind of i can sit here and cry but i also know that this is part of what comes with the territory and and i just have to like also tell myself that so yeah yeah well i'm really proud of you thank you you handled it like a champ i appreciate you i'm just glad that i have someone i can talk to about it at the same time yeah it's it's just not easy it's it's not easy so it's also just such a unique experience that not a lot of people experience right so then you're kind of just like does anyone get this no besides like obviously justin and selena like damn with my experience like i don't even want to know how that was but i know like holy crap yeah or like t swift and all of her her guys yeah like oh tough tough well i'm not going to say i want to shift gears into your brand really really quickly please talk about all in yes this is so cool i love uplifting women who have businesses and dreams and you're just you're such a go-getter thank you how did you even get inspired to launch this brand yeah so i was actually sponsored by cobra puma okay cobra and puma they're one entity in golf and so like big puma that's who i was sponsored by and i was pretty badass yeah thank you i was with them for seven years so i was with them for seven years and i was with them for seven years and i was with them for seven years and i was with them for seven years and i was with them for seven years so from the point of turning professional they took a chance on me in 2016 coming into 2017 basically and then i was with them up until 2023 And I had developed such a great relationship with them, still love them to this day. And there were a lot of talks in 2023 about, you know, renegotiation into 24, what that would look like, maybe a collaboration of some sort. And I think that was kind of the first time there was like a bug in my ear of like, oh, a collaboration. I can create like my own line, my own line, my own could be a really small capsule, whatever. And and that was becoming a thing like, oh, seeing personalities and celebrities build capsules with other brands. And I was like, wow, this could be so cool. I've never seen this done in the women's golf world. Maybe I could be the first, especially with Puma. Long story short, it didn't it didn't pan out. And that's OK. And in the renegotiations, it didn't feel aligned with me. You know, the fee, the ask. And I also felt like I was almost growing out of it. Like I was scripted for seven years, told what to wear, how to dress, how to be. And I was like, at what point can I just be me? I was honestly like, who am I? What? This is my style. I come up and I just wear this big cat everywhere. You know, I'm stamp stamped. I was looking like a NASCAR. At one point, I was like, I'm so proud. I'm so proud to rock all these brands. It was really cool. And then I got to a stage in my life where I'm like, I get paid and I get chosen to rep these brands. What if I did something that was actually me and mine that I wholeheartedly believed in? What can I do that's impactful, that is truly what I want and what I want other people to buy into? And then also enforce. So that was kind of the start. So 2024, I got an offer from a different brand to and they wanted to create a line with me. But they said, but we're going to own your name. Oh, and I said, well, this name that I built, the name that I was born with, the one on my birth certificate, like the thing that I worked so hard to build that like the last 10 years. Yeah. What? That's crazy. Like, oh, but you'll get royalties and this and that if we get on my own. Yeah. Yeah. Right. The thing that I own. Yeah. Like and I'm like, OK, that's not going to fly with me. And so then I was like, fuck it. I'm going to do it myself. Little did I know how hard that was going to be. And even trademarking like took me out. You know, all the stuff behind the scenes takes you out. Oh, my God, that charge. It was so much more expensive than I thought to do X, Y and Z. And but I just chipped away at every challenge one by one. If I were to look at everything, it's about to be a year that my my little baby all in golf has been alive. Congratulations. Thank you. We need to have an anniversary. We do. We do need to. And the new collection is coming out. But if I were to look at everything that I've been able to do with the brand and all the issues and tribulations that's come with it as a whole, I would have never started. But when I took on every challenge as it came, it made it more it made it more doable. Digestible. Digestible. And so in short, I knew I wanted to create something that was mine. And I'm like, what am I an expert in golf? OK, what do I know women need? Better, more functional clothes. Am I? Am I a designer? Absolutely not. Do I have style, though? Yes. I developed that from twenty twenty four to the present. I really developed my own style. I started trying out every brand. That was the advantage of getting all the PR kits. I'm like, oh, yeah, for market research. Oh, I like this texture. I'll be cutting out pieces. You know, this makes me feel sexy. This makes me feel confident. Yes. And so it was like, I know exactly what women need in golf and it can transcend into other like maybe athleisure or pickleball, whatever. Like tennis. Yes. And I was like, there's so many issues that we can solve. Like just. Just because I'm a woman and I care about what other women think. Like, for example, I don't know if many people know, but for the longest time at Cobra Puma, they they didn't model clothes on humans. They just did it on mannequins. Stop on a standard mannequin. That's a thirty two twenty six or thirty two twenty five, you know, and it's so basically you would have to be five seven. You know, you have to probably be around a cup, B cup, and you'd have a twenty five waist. And that's. Twenty five ways. Yeah. Like twenty. Yeah. Twenty five. If you were. Yeah. Snatch. Yeah. So not inclusive. Yeah. No, not inclusive. And and a lot of big brands do that. They just have, you know, they have these mannequins and then they throw these silhouettes on there. It makes so much sense why clothes don't fit me. Right. Yes, exactly. And I'm like, that doesn't sound right. And I remember the first time I went into a fitting. Granted, it may be so different now. I don't want to be exposing them in any which way. I'm sure every brand does this. But I was I remember being in the fitting and they're like, oh, we're going to talk about, you know, the twenty twenty five drop is like twenty twenty two or something like that. They're working so many years in advance and they're like showing me the silhouettes on the models. And I think I had asked, like, have you tried this on and on anyone? And they had said, like, this is it. And I'm like, so every mannequin here, you think this is like I am the cookie cutter. I'm a model and I can't be that. Yeah. Like that. That doesn't make sense. And I remember just something clicking in my brain at that time, like in twenty twenty one or twenty two, being like, that ain't right. Yeah. Like, where's the where's the oversized mannequin then? Yeah, that wasn't even a thing back then. Now you you look around, you'll see that. But yeah, there's plus size models. There's medium sized models. There's everyone of every kind. Yes. And I mean, I think the hardest part is that I'm a people pleaser and I want to appease every woman. And that's just not possible. Right. With with a brand. And a lot of my silhouettes are are a lot more fitted at this moment. But I do keep into consideration different sizes, different heights, different body types to the best of my ability. Right. I do my best. Yes. And so I think that was one thing that was like, is that a problem I can solve? Yes. And there's also nothing worse. Like the mannequin can't speak. So there's nothing worse than when you put clothes on and you're like, oh, this is like hugging me in a weird way. Yeah. Oh, this is like making my sides like spill out. Like I've had I mean, like I like you said, it's I've had I've tried so many active wear brands. Yeah. And there are some where it's like, I know I can't put that on unless I'm having the most snatch day of my life. Otherwise, I'll crash the hell out, you know, and like, if I feel like I'm being squeezed or constricted or like in weird places, like, or things are like cutting off my arms because I have muscle like, yeah, there's just no way to know that with a mannequin. Yeah. So that's so cool that you you took that into account. You were like, how can we do this differently? Yeah. I think what's so cool about you and what's similar to me and what's kind of speaking to like my passion is like, if you want something done right to yourself, and that's exactly what you did. It is exactly what I did. And granted, I understand. I understand why some brands can't do X, Y, and Z, or it's like, you know, there are a lot of complaints that women have when it comes to clothes and dressing women is the hardest, right? Because not only are we dealing with different heights, you're dealing with such different body statures. Like when you're designing for men, all you really actually have to worry about is length and shoulders. Yeah. And that's it. Yeah. There's only like really two variables. Yeah. Women, you're like, crap, boobs, ass, you know, tummy, breast, calves, and yes, and there's so many variables. There's so many things that can't work. And I'm like, again, path of most resistance. But it's like, I care so deeply. I really, really want to solve problems. So it's like, you've tried on the clothes and we're known for having tea holders on our hats. Little problem. Girls, you don't have to put teas in your hair because you shouldn't put fertilizer in your hair, by the way. Put teas on your hats, right? Yeah. You shouldn't put dirt in your hair, right? And because all golfers, it's a golf habit for women. You put teas in your ponytail. You're just like, yeah, it's just like a habit that we all have because where are you going to put it? You can't put it in your skirt. You're wearing a skin tight skirt. You're going to stab yourself when you swing, right? Yeah. And so you just put it in your hair. It's quick and easy. Things like that. I didn't know that. Like our skirts, they're adjustable in length. It's such an easy fix because we get dress coded. You can't have skirts too short. I'm like, okay, why don't I make a skirt that can be fit for someone that's 4'11 to 5'8? I think I can do that. Why not? One. Genius. Whatever. You're going to pay a hundred bucks for it. Well, I just solved your problem. So I think it's worth it. And now you have two skirts in one. Yeah, now you can wear one around your parents and then you can wear one around your boyfriend. Yes, exactly. So it's little things like that that really make me feel so fulfilled that I'm like, I'm solving a problem that I feel like is so simple. And I also think it shows that I really care. It does. And so there's so many things that I want to solve. And the funny thing is like, I have an idea. You'll see it in a year. That's the hardest part. That is the hardest part. But you know, there's nothing more fulfilling than me seeing my clothes on someone random. Yeah. I'll be like at an airport. I'm like, is that my hat? Or like at the course, I'm like, is that the all-in da-da-da-da-da? And I'm like, oh, my heart is so full. That's so special. Yeah, it is. And also how perfectly fitting that your last name is all-in. Yes. Like, wow, so perfect. Yeah, it really is. It was divine. Okay, well, we need to get into Dear Athlete. It's a little segment here on the show where we just give advice to athletes that are listening. Yes. So first question, what's one piece of advice you'd give to someone going through heartbreak right now in the midst of a heartbreak? In the midst of a busy season? Ooh, heartbreak, like in what way? Like, like literal heartbreak? I mean, it could be whatever it speaks to you. Gosh, I think my advice would be to really lean into your passion and let that drive you. Like, use your hurt and your pain to drive into what you love. Yeah. Do that. And then find your community. I was going to say. Lean on your community. You cannot do this alone. God, no. This is not the time to be jealous or angry. This is the time to lean on your people. Yeah. And they will be, they'll be there for you. This is when you really learn, actually, who is there for you. Facts. And I think what's really cool, too, is you see this opportunity of, okay, I have all of this love to give. I have all of this passion, this drive that I was giving to a person that wasn't deserving of it. Now, how cool is it that I get to give all of that to things that are actually going to give back to me, that are actually going to matter, that actually deserve it? To myself. And to myself. Yeah, to love yourself. Oh, my God. Again, it's, it's, it really is, you know, it's, it's such an interesting, I think, feeling because. as athletes i really do believe that athletes actually have extra nor an extraordinary amount of love to offer because of the dedication and love you put towards your sport so like when you love someone it's it is all or nothing i think for an athlete mindset and so to be a reminder to literally pour that back into yourself and then for the next go around make sure you keep that there yeah it really is a learning curve like that is what i'm going through and learning right now wow you're doing amazing i'm really proud of you thank you okay what's something you wish you knew earlier about entrepreneurship and building your brand there there is no linear path there is a linear path never and it's okay with that it literally is up and then down and then up and then down and then you you really are putting out fires every single day and you have to love the process if you're only looking at the outcome doesn't matter what you do but especially in entrepreneurship if you're only looking at the outcome quit you're gonna be miserable yeah i know and i was actually just thinking about that when you were talking earlier about all of the challenges that you have to knock out along the way i truly believe sometimes ignorance is bliss when it comes to entering into a passion project truly because like if i if someone were to put on a whiteboard this is how much everything's going to cost this is if i were all the issues you're going to go through break down every single little intricate thing that was going to take to launch a podcast or to build a brand or to be an entrepreneur i wouldn't do it exactly as determined and devoted and passionate as i am like yeah that feels like a really big wall and so i think sometimes being a little ignorant being a little delusional and just recognizing okay these are my controllables let's just take this let's move forward let's try it trial and error is going to get you through because at the end of the day like who gives a fuck if you failed exactly you tried and there's one there is no better way to learn than to do that part just that like not one it is never going to be perfect launch that shit yeah do it do it it'll never be perfect it'll never be perfect and then if it fails who cares and you that's that's kind of god or universe telling you like try something different then yeah do something else and you tried and like what a cool opportunity to like learn and then grow and then learn and then grow and then grow and you just grow until you die i'm just gonna keep going yeah all right last question how do you think someone can genuinely build self-love and confidence in today's world wow how from the confident queen herself i know it's i think it's really interesting because i think i was born with like having a strong will and confidence and and sometimes like i'll tell my brothers like just just do it you know like i don't get it and they're like well i'm not you and so i have to really empathize i think you have to literally learn how to speak to yourself and and if you especially for people who speak so kindly to others you have to remind yourself to be a confident queen and to be a confident queen and to be a confident queen to speak just as kindly to yourself yeah because how you perceive yourself is truly how you believe yourself right and you have to be just as kind as you are to the world to yourself if you were constantly diminishing your own light or demeaning yourself or self-deprecating yourself how are you ever going to have self-love and confidence yeah and and it's kind of weird and hard to tell yourself like i am pretty i am the shit yeah i am confident but you have to just start you just start by saying it you could do it in your head you could do it in your head you could do it in the mirror and you'd be really surprised at how much it actually changes the way you stand in a day you know yeah yeah because otherwise you're crying on the beach like i was and then you're like okay time to buck up bitch it's time to take on the world i'm like just one little quick crash out by the beach and we're good oh i do that all the time and we're back yeah i think for me like the way to build your confidence is like be your best friend like you said and yeah it's not weird when your best friend's hyping you up so why is it weird when we hype ourselves up exactly as women like we're encouraged to not do that because we come off as cocky or come off as yeah you know too confident or narcissistic or whatever and it's like well screw that when you're alone and you're struggling you gotta hold your hand yeah you do and there's nothing wrong with that exactly coming from two boss girls that's right yeah well thank you so much tish i am obsessed with you i'm obsessed with you i'm like we just had a therapy session we literally cried halfway through i was like oh my god we have a mic like i forgot we're like even on the pod right now i know it's so great those are the best yeah well i really appreciate you coming on taking the time i know you're a busy girl and you've got a lot of really exciting things coming up can we quickly say what you're doing yes so everyone can tune in absolutely well we do have our our late spring collection coming out with all and you can follow us at all in golf it's a-l-y-n golf and you can follow me at tisha all in as well i'm always traveling and on the move but you'll be seeing a lot of all in pop-ups you'll be seeing me at the u.s open the u.s women's open and then of course you'll be watching our brand grow i can't wait for y'all to see the next color yay i'm so excited and you guys are gonna see me and you will see gracie in it looking snatched and you'll see our sports spot oh my gosh you get to see her try gymnastics and she teaches me golf but we do need to try again with the golf because that was really humbling and really it's okay i want to try again with the gymnastics because yes you know maybe we'll have to do a part two if you guys love it we'll do a part two yes that's the beauty of this job we can do whatever we want exactly that we can do gymnastics for the rest of our lives that's true okay well love you guys so so much thank you for tuning in and i will see you next wednesday bye