Gracie & Ali Riley on Pro Soccer, Captain Mentality, & New Identities

We sacrifice so much and we work so hard and we miss weddings and funerals and births and all of these things and then and then you feel like you failed. She's a four-time Olympian. She played over 160 games for her country. She's a longtime captain of the New Zealand women's national team and she's appeared in multiple FIFA Women's World Cups. Allie Riley, welcome to Athletes After Hours. Thank you, Gracie. I'm so happy to be here and you live in one of the best places on earth probably. So you didn't have to twist my arm to come down and see you. I'm so happy and you're literally so close by as well. So it's so nice that we can just hang out. But I'm like, we should have just done this at the beach, honestly. Well, I am just such a fan of yours after spending as much time as we did with the sports swap. We're a little trauma bonded now. That was I didn't know what I was getting. Myself into. But now that it's over, it was the best day, the best two days. Obviously, I flipping around in the really gross foam pit was like, I don't know. That was I'll remember that forever. You were so icked out by the foam pit actually sent me. It was so good was in my mouth. Yeah, it was pretty gross. It's not good. I mean, I love that you just full scented, though, and you like completely bought into it because I mean, it's very easy, especially I think as an athlete who's had to take care of their body. For as long as you have to be very cautious and fearful of like getting injured or just like your longevity of your body. And so for you to be like, fuck it, we're sending it. It helps that I am retired. True. But I it was it made me really proud of myself that I we did warm up. We did warm up. But we tried the splits. Yes. Yeah. Yeah. Tried keyword that I was open. To obviously trying the gymnastics. But also it was the first time I had been back on a soccer field and kicking a ball since retiring. I know, even though I got back on the field with Angel City, it was still amidst a lot of rehab and just so much gym work and treatment, constant everything I was doing for my body. And then once leaving the team, it's kind of been up to me and I still have a workers comp claim open. So I am. I'm able to get physical therapy, but it's been such a huge adjustment. And so to have felt how my body has healed and I think my mind and soul and my heart since that last game on November 2nd, it's so cool that I shared that moment with you two days of just celebrating our bodies and showing what's possible after retiring from sport and getting your perspective also on retirement in such a different industry. And what happened with your season and COVID and just the world of gymnastics where you really, if I mean, when, when college is over, you're done. That was it. Yeah. All that work. This 20 years, honestly, like down the drain. It's like, what do you can't really, you know, do flips in a public gym, except you are not a public gym, but at UCLA. And that's what makes you so impressive. And that's why I think we just are these kindred spirits. It's because we're hustlers and we're entering this time when the next generation doesn't have to hustle so hard and we're celebrating that. But that's like, we both in very different sports and very different backgrounds are entrepreneurs and we've started our businesses and we both started podcasts at the same time, but we're also really trying to give back to our sport. So yeah, I've learned so much from you. I one have to say, I was so honored when we were on the field and you were like, yeah. This is my first time picking a ball since retirement. And I'm like, every athlete knows how big of a deal that is. So for you to tell me that in the moment, I'm like putting on my cleats. I'm like, no pressure. Great. Like, holy shit. Like, hopefully she has fun. Hopefully I don't embarrass myself. It was so good. Now you have me open to maybe playing pickup at some point. I don't know. I'm still scared of getting injured, but we had a really great day and we did like the little flip with the ball. And you were like, oh, you did the flip with the ball. I attempted to do like a chest. Volley. It wasn't good. No, it was iconic. And now we have the best celebration ever. We can do it every game now. Any Angel City game where it's going to be saluting. Speaking of which. Yes. We need to get you to an Angel City game. I know. So I got to know when you decided to start playing for Angel City, like what prompted that decision? It wasn't really my decision. Which again is why I'm so proud that we've come so far in a short time in. Women's sports, of course, in general, celebrating the WNBA's new CBA that they've agreed to terms. But with women's soccer as well, just in the last five years, we've come so far. And with our most recent CBA players have autonomy over their careers. You cannot trade someone against their will. Let's go. And you also don't kind of own them once their contract runs out, which is a whole, whole other thing. I'm not even going to explain because we don't have that anymore. But basically. I loved playing for Orlando Pride and I loved my teammates. I loved living in Orlando. Yeah. We just. Yeah. Twenty twenty one. Despite COVID and some, you know. Just stop start with the country, the world in terms of coming back to sport and in-person events after the pandemic. I thought I would be there for a long time. A long time and got to the end of the season. And they were like, we are not interested in keeping you. And can you imagine by Ali what I can imagine because it happened to me, I can't. And I can't imagine letting you go. That's such a stupid move on their part. I'm sorry. Like you're an absolute gem and you don't just offer such incredible soccer skills. You offer so much beyond that. Thank you. So that was a massive loss on their part. I have to say, I had started every game. I was in a leadership group and they just said, look, you, you won't even. Travel probably for this team. So why we want to bring in new faces, all these things. Interesting. So and this is happening to players was happening to players all over the league at the time. And it was it was definitely scary to be in that position in my thirties. And yeah, so I could not negotiate with anybody else because even though they were saying. We don't really want you, it was between the clubs, we were employees of the league and my agent wasn't allowed to reach out to other clubs. So this is all this complicated, even though they let you go, because basically they said, we'll keep you, but for this amount of money, oh my God, and wanted to decrease my salary by a lot of money. And so you're still stuck married to this team. Yes. And you're like, bitch, I want a divorce. Exactly. Let me out. Exactly. Oh my God. How did you get out of it? Angel City came into the league. Okay. And they were interested. Thank goodness. And so I was traded. Literal angel sent from above. Yes. Yes. And even in those conversations, it was really like, you know, we have our roster pretty much set here. And because Angel City, they had been formed in 2020, they'd signed Kristen Press. They were slowly signing players. And this was really late in the game. Yeah. So this was January of 2022, my first season at Angel City. And the roster had been pretty much set and they said, look, we can't guarantee you playing time. We don't know what role you're going to play, but we know who you are as a character and as a person. And obviously that, that was meaningful, but also I was like, I'm going to fight to play. Of course. And I just came in with no expectations. I was so happy to have a chance to return home and to be with my family. And then, you know, fast forward a few months and I was walking the team out to the first ever Angel City game. And it changed my life. Completely. But that is, that is the reality of what women's sports looked like, where it was, it was chance. It was the fact that Orlando offered me this low salary and then Angel City said, we'll take her and all these things. And the CBA changed everything. The CBA was signed in 2022. Okay. So I was able to get paid what I deserved. No one's getting paid what they deserve in women's sports, but I was able to make the salary that I was making before, which was really important. Yeah. So a lot changed initially. In a short period of time, but, but coming to Angel City was, was not really my choice, which I think makes the journey and the results so much more fantastic and miraculous and special and very serendipitous. Yes. You're like, this was such a beautiful bow out of your sport to be able to kind of have that bookend in your city with incredible people that value you and want you to be a part of the team. And I mean, how did you not let that transition kind of make you feel shitty? Like, did it really affect your worth? Cause I mean, for someone as big as, you know, these massive programs to be like, this is how much you're worth. Like, how does that not, I would be like, okay, I guess I'm not worth anything. You know what I mean? Yeah. This is like, did that knock your confidence? Of course. Of course. This is. where sport as a business and. just the more exposure we're getting as women athletes and as salaries are becoming more and more transparent and as we're doing these negotiations across different sports, it really is, you're saying here's a minimum salary. This is, players who play professional women's sports in the United States are only worth five figures. to play a sport where we get the hell out of everything, give everything. I mean, you leave the sport in bits, you know? No, literally. And, uh, that's what we're saying. And so I think it is hard and you're on a team and one person's making this amount and one person's making that amount. But I think what I love about women's soccer and especially in this country, um, and I think women's sports, the collective voice and how we know that if a woman signs a new record breaking salary, that's a win for all of us. And it might not be me, especially I was on the, I was on my way out when all of this started happening. I'm so proud. I mean, that is what I fought for. That is why I went through the experience of being traded like that. And I said, I don't want anyone else to experience. This has been going on for years. I don't want anyone else to experience this. I don't want anyone else to experience this for too long. And all these voices coming together, even though we might not benefit from it. That was my last, you know, that was my last contract coming to angel city. I did a contract extension, but this was the last stop on the train for me. But all these other women now for years, especially we have teenagers, they could be playing now for 20 more years and they will earn so much more money. So yeah, I got offered 50 grand from Orlando. No fucking way. And you kind of, for me, I just saw it instead of like, this is a reflection of my worth. This is a reflection of the times. And I'm going to fight to make sure that the minimum salary gets higher and higher and higher. We're still fighting, but, um, obviously the W's new CBA is kind of a, a beacon of, of hope now for the rest of women's sports, I think, to see what is possible. But I, I guess I've tried not to take anything too personally because I understand that it is, uh, it's one part of a very complicated, we're still fighting against people who say no one cares about women's sports. And, you know, you make a mistake and there's a highlight and all the comments are like, this is why they shouldn't get paid. And she shouldn't be playing. And, you know, men make a mistake and everyone laughs about it and they still buy his Jersey. So I think, uh, I just see it more as a reflection of the times and as fuel to fight, to make sure that changing and pushing and just breaking through that ceiling over and over and over again. And you have the perfect personality for it. You're like a little pit bull. Yeah. And then I do it with a smile. So you're like, yeah, like she's mad, but like, I can't help it. Like smile. So I don't know. Yeah. But it takes a lot of energy. And so I have to celebrate all the small wins. Otherwise it feels like we're never, never going to get where we want to go, which will take a long time, but we got to celebrate the wins. All sports, not just in soccer. Absolutely. Um, but we are seeing some amazing growth in soccer and just some huge Kat Macario now signing. She's going to have guaranteed $8 million. Let's go. I mean, and this is like, is that the biggest signing? Yeah. Really? After Trinity? Yeah. Oh my gosh. Yeah. That's incredible. I love that. I mean, yeah, it's, it's a domino effect for sure. Because these girls, I think, I think the biggest wake up call for us is to talk about the money because if we don't talk about it, then you're like, oh yeah, I'll take 40,000. And you're like, exactly, exactly. But that's, it's really hard because it feels so personal. It is so personal to us as athletes, because we've put our heart and soul and every ounce of ourselves into our sport. And then for someone to be like, yeah, that's only worth, you know, basically minimum wage. It's like, yeah. And I can't even live off of that. We're talking about such low numbers because I'm like, okay, if you're making one point, 2 million and I'm making, you know, 1,087,000, I'm like, okay. But now it's like, she's only making 60 grand and she's making 8 million. Like, so you feel a way about it. And that's why, again, I'm so proud that we, as, as a league and especially with our players association, we're like, this doesn't mean I'm not worth it, but we're all together going to fight to make sure, you know, all the ships rise. I was just going to say when, when the water's rise, the ships need to rise with it. I could not agree more. And I feel like, I mean, even in content space, I've noticed, like, I've had to have wake up calls of like, okay, you've been accepting like very low numbers in comparison to other people that have a fraction of your following just because you didn't know, like knowledge is power. And the second, you know, that you're worth so much more is the moment that you finally can get that control and power back. Yeah. And demands your worth. I'm so glad you're saying that. And I think the more of us who understand that, but at the same time, it is really hard to say no to money. It's so hard not to kind of lessen your, your value because especially when you retire and when we go into media or some of these jobs where you don't have this paycheck coming in each month, you don't have benefits that it feels so tempting to accept an offer from a billion dollar company to do a post for $3,000. And then you're like, well, if I don't do it, they'll find someone else who will. So talking about it is so important. And I think what I've realized, and again, this is speaking from a position of privilege where I have a following where I can say no. Yeah. But when you say no, I think, and if you were true to yourself and you are good at what you do, a partner will come along who does respect you and who does value you. But it is really scary to wait or fight for that person or company brand sponsor to come along. But now that we're seeing so much more investment in women's sports, we are not all fighting for this tiny piece of the pie, the pie, the shares of the pie have gotten bigger. So there is more space for multiple podcasts for multiple commercial partners on each podcast. And so that's what kind of gives me hope and is something to, um, yeah, a little more reassurance to give anyone who is out there thinking, how can I say no to this? Like, no, there are, brands out there who believe in us and value us. Yeah. And I think having those partners too, that see us as human beings first, not just a number, not just a poster child, not just someone on a billboard. And I have noticed a shift, a lot of brands now wanting to do in-person events to connect with the people. Like, I mean, I just had an event with Puma last night and being able to see the Puma execs face to face and have, you know, genuine conversations. It gives you a leg up because you can really show your authentic self to them. And then they can truly assess and not just look at you as a number and not look at your following. And it's like, oh, well she doesn't have X, Y, Z. So we don't want to work with her instead. They get to meet me personally. And they're like, oh my gosh, she's fired up about her podcast. She's very passionate. This very much aligns with our brand. And then it sets you up so much better than to be like, oh yeah, we saw her resume and it's not that impressive. It's like, well, we're human. First, let's look, you know, let's look a little deeper. And I think that can kind of translate to sports as well. Like, like I said, I just, I still cannot believe Orlando would not utilize you the way that you truly deserved because of how much you bring to the game that has nothing to do with soccer. Well, thank you. How did you develop that? As you know, you're obviously a phenomenal leader. You were one of the best in your sport. Gracie, like I'm just here to hype you up, obviously, but like, I just want to know, how did you develop that? Because like you're dealing with so much too, with obviously trying to hone in on your skills with soccer, but you took it so much further. I think it, it is a product of the time that we were in with women's sports, which is why, um, which, which doesn't feel like a good thing. Cause I'm like, yeah, I've got good at public speaking and all these side hustles because I wasn't making a lot of money, but I did have to. And I think my mom, she's Chinese. She didn't see this as a sustainable career. She was really worried about me. Um, she obviously wanted me to be a doctor or a lawyer to anyone with Chinese moms out there. You get it. Um, I, yes, I had to play an instrument. I played the piano. Um, and I think that was why going to Stanford was really important to get an education. Even before we knew playing, being a professional was even a possibility, even a possibility. And it wasn't at the time, um, was if you can't play soccer for whatever reason, you can't play soccer for whatever reason. And I think that was really you need to have an education. You need to be a first need to be a good person. You need to have an education. You need to be prepared, have something to fall back on. Yes. Yeah. And even when I got drafted, the team that drafted me folded after one season, my rookie season. So then I'm getting all of these kinds of, uh, reminders that this is not a sustainable career. The year after that, the entire women's professional soccer league in the United States folded beginning of 2012. So that's why I went abroad. So when I, when I started this career, Oh my God, my stress levels would be so high. Profession, I was constantly being told, this is not something you'll be able to do for a long time yeah 17 seasons later yeah I had a lot of time to really hone different skills and when I had an injury I just thought look I need to find balance first of all for just me as a human your identity but also what is something that I can work on here and it ended up being content creation and being in front of camera and being someone you know while my teammates were thinking about the game on Saturday when I wasn't able to play yeah I'll be the one to do any little bits for you and make content and that the social team at Chelsea in particular really appreciated that and we had a good relationship and so that gave me more confidence so that when I did return to the NWSL yeah I was a really different person I think you offered so much more than just your skills and I think that's important to a team and especially if you're a team member you're not going to be able to do that you're not going to be able to do that you're not going to be able to do that you're not going to be able to do that especially if you're a team member you're not going to be able to do that you're not going to especially if you're a team member you're not going to be able to do that you're not especially when sometimes who plays who starts is is out of your control all you can do is your best right and then at the end of the day the coach is going to make a decision but I'm always going to be the best teammate and an advocate and a good person and so that to for that to live alongside what was a successful career where I was playing and I was a captain I think that helped prepare me for then this injury I had for the last two years for retirement that who I was as a person I was authentically myself the entire time and that that showed in the content I was doing and any media I was doing and any time I would have to speak on behalf of my national team or my club team yeah and especially coming to LA and Angel City I realized that I was more motivated to perform when I had a higher purpose when I knew I was representing my hometown when I knew that every goal we scored a thousand meals were being donated to the greater Los Angeles people who needed it you know like all of the values of Angel City they resonated with me and being inclusive and um that was something that drove me to perform even better so they they definitely live hand in hand it's not like oh if you want to be a good person and a you know good at public speaking it's gonna take away from how good you're on you are on the field like no I definitely think they aligned so well for me and I'm so happy to see more and more players feeling like they can be their authentic selves whether it is to be you know a leadership type and someone who likes to talk a lot like me or someone who likes to come and make up and their amazing style to a game and play with that kind of flair and that freedom that I never found as a player yeah and I just love that we're seeing that so much more and we're seeing more diversity and players just feeling represented and able to be authentic yeah so that's again more ammunition more things for me to talk about and advocate for so it's just something that's lived alongside my playing career my entire career because of the landscape when I started playing I love that I mean I think you also continuing to be your most authentic self all it did was continue to inspire other people and now they're like oh there's a possibility for me to do not only just soccer I can create my own brand I can build a business like we've talked about this um on the pod in the past with some other athletes where they didn't realize what was possible until they saw someone do it yeah and so it's really cool that you're a trailblazer for all these younger athletes who are just starting out you know like you said they're starting very young which is like insane what like 16 years old oh there are a couple of 13 year olds get out that's a topic for another day but yes no we've got um at angel city we had a couple we had a 16 17 year old now now they're both um over 18 but yeah they had to have their own locker room and yeah we had we had you're like a mama bear I mean the 16 year old literally I wouldn't have even been a teen mom she could have been my child that's insanity how was that dynamic like culturally different yeah very different again these these young athletes are are amazing and were they able to hold their own oh yeah I mean we look at Kennedy Fuller she is gonna have an outstanding in game one but um they they just have and they they've grown up watching women play sports and women in media again something that we didn't have so um but it is we live very different lives yes do they make more money than me but they well they they are on their phones a lot more I'm like married and um happy to hang out with my husband yeah and very different lives yes I have no idea no no they're really serious oh love that they're really serious I don't know if this is across sports but my um the vibe I'm getting from these young they're very very serious they're like super dialed in they have fun but like their fun is like doing mukbangs and like making tiktoks and like very I would say like straight edge yeah wow and they and they don't want to I'm sure some of them drink but like you know they don't want to jeopardize their position on the team yeah and I think they they're so professional and they're professional athletes and they're they didn't have the kind of like crazy high school and and college yeah even like when I started playing pro like after every game we would go out and party yeah and that's not um yeah that's not really a thing anymore no at least not at Angel City when I was playing at Angel City so you're like anyone want to do a wine night it's like crickets you're like yeah well they're not even old enough to drink and I can't give them alcohol oh yeah fair old enough to drink yes I didn't even think about that very different 13 year old is like actually I have homework and you're like the hell and they exactly they had school that is so wild but I I do think that they really respect the fight that went in in the same way of course that we we respect and want to honor the the players that came before us I think they are um very very in um yeah in impactful and insightful and everything they say they're always saying like we know that we got here because of the fight that came before us and so I think back to what we're talking about about kind of the side hustle in these young players I think the beauty the beautiful thing will be that it will be a choice for them if they want to go into media while they're playing if they want to be a content creator they're not forced to do it to supplement their income yeah wow and let's be honest with you if you're not a fan of media if you're not a fan of media if you're not a fan of but they will have to earn more money during the the rest of their life if you know not you can't it doesn't matter how good you are that money's not guaranteed forever yeah and you you have to retire at some point it's professional sports so if we say these players will retire in their 30s they will have a lot of money to a lot of time to make a lot of money but will probably even male athletes you know they go into something else when they retire um and sometimes that money dries up there's no guarantee yes and that's if you're not prepared uh-uh if you don't know how to invest your money properly or you get caught up and swept up in the whole you know pro-athlete cultural exactly norm of let's go buy a bunch of cars and buy a bunch of designer bags and it's like babe that that shit loses value the second it leaves a lot and I wonder as we see women obviously they're making not making NFL money yet but I do wonder I know like women are smarter so it's not going to happen yeah but it is a different time and now we're looking at what's going to happen with the the w players and how much money they're going to be earning and it's a huge huge increase so it it just I think it'll be cool to see when we start making when I say we I don't mean me when women start making yes start making this type of money that we are going to be so much smarter with yes it's a collective fight honestly that would be such a fascinating study to know if we're comparing a woman who's making five million dollars versus a man in the NFL making five million dollars how much money they spend on an annual and how quickly like you know what I mean because I do genuinely believe that like you will value your money so much more if you actually had to work for it and with these types of contracts where you're just getting that shit handed to you yes of course the NFL is very grueling I don't want to take away from the hard work that goes into being in the NFL but they didn't have to work for that salary yeah I mean this is it's been a thing since yes it's been a thing since you know the beginning and so I think having an easier time getting those huge contracts like maybe it's just easier to spend the money we'll see I know I think it's wild though it gives me actual anxiety because like I hate spending money because even in my profession obviously I'm not a professional athlete but being in content creation there's no guarantee I don't have a guarantee for how many brand deals I get a month yeah I don't have a guarantee whether or not this podcast makes me any money I think I made $16 I just got into the Spotify creator fund yes we will celebrate that $16 I can buy myself a sweet treat yeah I'm like that's one that's that's not even a you're on smoothie it's a it's a it's a chipotle bowl it's not even a you're on smoothie it's a chipotle bowl it's not even a chipotle bowl it's not even a chipotle these girls and I I'm sure they could not thank you more so they don't need to thank me they just need to get their money and that will make me so so happy and it's happening it's happening right before our eyes and I think having that mentality with your guys's specific sport is so healthy because you're like if you win we all win there's no competitiveness because I have wondered that with especially the NIL stuff I've talked with a few college athletes now dealing with the NIL and I mean shit like look at Livvy Dunn making eight I don't know how many millions of dollars she's made at LSU but then there's in the same team in the same gym training the same hours maybe even competing way more than she was making yeah not even six figures like does that create animosity does that you know hurt the culture of the program and I'm always so curious like did you guys ever struggle with the culture just because of contracts like being public knowledge so right now in the NWSL they aren't public okay they are transparent among the players so still yes okay I mean to your point we still know yeah yeah but no because what it creates is not animosity might not be the right word but is wait a second when I renegotiate my contract now I have yeah knowledge which means I have power it was never like oh my gosh she's not assisting that much or scoring enough goals how is she getting that much money it was I was always so happy to see how much money that players were making so much more than me that just made me really happy again I was at a very different stage of my career so I can't really speak for how that would feel if you're like coming up you're playing a ton and you're not getting paid the same as someone who's warming the bench yes yes like I wonder about that right so I I can't speak to that but in terms of the conversations that I was part of and what I what I understand about our collective voice and our players association I think the players have it's a positive thing to be able to then understand what you can fight for and see how much of the salary cap per team is being utilized and again this is the thing with women's soccer and the salary cap the GMs are fitting these players into this puzzle whereas overseas and this is this constant conversation we're having about the English league and the U.S. league is is the salary cap so that is a little bit more I would say it creates more frustration around having a salary cap yeah than oh she's getting more than me because there's no there's no room for growth right and the salary there's no incentive the salary cap is going up by a certain amount now until the um the CBA expires but I think a lot of us are arguing that it should uh they need to release the leash a little bit quicker or by more and so there's a new rule um that was just introduced where a few players who meet a certain criteria can earn up to one million dollars above the salary cap okay but what my argument would be is just increase the salary cap and then increase the salary cap and then increase the salary cap by a million dollars and then you can choose who you want to spend that money on it can be a player who doesn't play for the national team but has so much value for your team or you spend it across you know three players five players yeah yeah um but yeah so that's the kind of a hot topic right now in the NWSL that's all the tea yeah how was becoming a four-time Olympian I just gotta know like oh I you know it it's it's really nice to now be able to reflect on the four Olympics that I played on played in because the most recent one was the one where I had to withdraw due to injury two days before the opening game so the Paris Olympics I didn't know that and thinking about the Olympics has been a real like a trigger and a huge source of sadness for me and now like being done with my career I can really think about and celebrate the other four instead of thinking so much about 2024 um and it it really it's it's it's it's it's it's it really of course I'm so proud it was such an honor and to represent a really really special country and going into the Olympic Village every New Zealand athlete is welcomed with a haka yeah and that now of course with social media you always you're seeing when someone wins a medal so they're celebrated with a haka and you can see in the village but of course you know in in 2008 and in 2012 this wasn't something that was shared as much around the internet yeah um but it was I think those those moments are some of the most just spiritual and unique and special that I think I will have in my life like to have and it's something that not a lot of people of course people get haka'd for different reasons but to be one of the few athletes representing New Zealand who gets to come into an Olympic Village and have your fellow athletes and the the staff at the village do this very very meaningful act to welcome you and honor you and celebrate you and wish you luck and just everything it means so many different things yeah that was the first time was like yeah my brain exploded but it's it never gets old and I think again kind of full circle my teammates they did a haka for me from the field when I was in the stands when I watched their first game obviously having just been removed from the team and so that was kind of like the last did you sob your eyes out yeah I think I cried for like a month straight after getting withdrawn from the Olympics but that was it was such an honor and it was so special and from having that first experience in 2008 in Beijing to then my last Olympic related haka um in 2024 from the from the stands that was yeah I can look back at that I can literally feel your emotions like yeah over here it was it's nice to finally start feeling like I can just be really happy and proud with my career because yeah that was it felt like such a disappointment and you know there's so much pressure as an athlete you feel like you're representing so many people and you've worked so hard for these moments and having an injury having your season end because of the pandemic all of these things that are out of our control but they hit really really hard and they can affect us such a long time for our entire lives because we sacrifice so much and we work so hard and we miss weddings and funerals and births and all of these things and then and then you feel like you failed and it's yeah it was really really hard I've had to work through that a lot um but now yeah I I feel like why I I didn't give enough love to the to the other four you know like those are all experiences so I I'm finally stopped like have stopped putting so much weight on on the one that got away yeah um but yeah that's uh the olympics are something so special and I think now especially as we're seeing women olympians get their flowers that came through so strongly in 2024 and at this winter olympics that the stories are about women and it's changing the landscape for all of us and I think that's another thing that I'm so I feel really lucky because yes we fought really hard and these young players are going to earn so much money playing soccer than I ever did but by staying involved in sport and being an investor myself in a women's volleyball team and by now having a role with angel city and by covering the sport that investment is getting to me as well and I am getting this reward of everything we fought for so it does yeah if you if you can look at it that way again like I would never be bitter and never be jealous of of what these players are getting because that was the whole point yeah truly how are you still so entrenched in soccer after such a painful ending because for me like I couldn't go back to a gymnastics meet for like years well you know my friend asked me to teach her how to play so I had to um I think I think it is like the celebrating the wins and I'm able to separate my painful experiences from the progress we're making and and again like by covering the sport I'm getting to be part of it too like I had never had my hair and makeup professionally done until an angel city media day that was the first time and then now like on in studio and on set like I get to have my hair and makeup done you're a superstar and I get to talk about the things that I've done for my job I get to talk about these amazing women who are doing the sport that I loved but also getting so much more recognition for it and I also get to be one of the people giving them the recognition you know so I think instead of and like it was definitely weird going to that angel city game last week I know I was gonna text you and check on you like are you good it was weird but I think I'm such like a lover girl and I the fans and the the women's sports community and the women's soccer community they've lifted me up that I don't have space to even feel that sad you know I still have these moments but I just everyone is so happy and so nice and so warm and welcoming and just like I don't know I don't know I don't know I don't know just really welcomed me into this next chapter with open arms, whether it was the fans, the club, or the women who had retired before me, like Kelly O'Hara, Leanne Sanderson, Jen Beattie, Allie Krieger, I mean, all of these women, Tobin Heath, who had gone through it and felt the love themselves and then were able to extend that to me as I left the game and mentor me. Julie Foudy is helping me with how to set up my board so I can call my first game. Like we're all empowering each other. And so, yeah, really, yeah. Sometimes when I'm alone in my car, I definitely cry, but I think I'll always do that. We just get in our sad girl moments, but it's okay. I mean, it's better to do that by ourselves than to be crying in a stadium. People have seen me cry now here too, but so much. So I'm- It's okay, I went viral for crying, so. I definitely get you there. So, no, I just, I really feel this very, very pure joy when I'm around the sport. And I know that makes me lucky and I don't expect everyone to feel that way. But I also, I was able to mourn and grieve the end of my career during those two years where I was injured and when I wasn't able to compete in Paris. And so I think I also got that little happy ending with returning to the field and being celebrated like that. And so again, I know I'm really lucky that I- kind of get to say I ended my career on my own terms just because I made it back to the field. But I think it was, it wasn't really a choice, but I did get to play long enough that the wheels fell off and that does make me lucky. And I think about that when I watch and I cover the sport now. I really applaud you for having the standard that you have for yourself and your career because I think a lot of people listening would maybe not be able to relate because you're out here talking about being sad about a fifth Olympics that you didn't make. You make a good point. Out of the four. But I can 100% relate to this and I do think a lot of athletes can relate to this because we're conditioned to hold ourselves to such an impossible standard. Yeah. And all this outside- All the outside noise too. Like I remember you telling me the biggest hurt was you feeling like you let your fans down. Yeah. Can you talk about that a little bit? Yeah. I think that's why our community is really important and why- While social media can be a very dark place, I think it has changed women's sports. Truly. And it's connected all of us and it's given us this voice and this platform. But I think most importantly, the collective voice and the community. And I think that that is- And I don't know if this is still rooted in the fact that we don't get paid as much, but it's like the fans and your relationships mean so- So much. And I feel like so many male athletes or male coaches are like, you know, what happens between the white lines stays between the white lines. But if someone treats me like shit at training, like that's not going to get the best out of me and it's unnecessary. And that for me is not high performing. And I am going to say something after we leave the field. Like- That's just not how I operate. And as a leader, I think understanding how my teammates, what would get the best out of them. And I, I, I, I never had a majority of my team say like, yeah, you can say whatever you want to me and yell at me and bring me down. Like, and that's okay. And we can be tight later. Like, no, it means a lot to us. And I don't know if that is, I think it is connected to the fact that our relationship means relationships mean a lot because yeah, we're like making five figures. But I, I think that for me probably tied into a little bit of like, I'm not doing this for the money. I'm doing this because I love it and because I'm representing people. And I have this opportunity to have a platform. And when I'm out there, I'm going to show out for my country and my family, and be this person that people can look to and, and inspire everyone and motivate everyone. And it's so much pressure, but it's also, it's just so meaningful and so yeah. And so when I feel like there are these expectations, of myself and, and that I've created that for other people to expect of me, and I want them to expect that of me that then, yes, when you fail, when you're injured, when, when whatever happens, you don't play it, it really, I felt so much like I was letting people down, even though nobody ever said that to me. No. And I think that is where this, like being kind to yourself and giving yourself grace and like this, this self talk and just it's, you can get so much affirmation validation from other people externally. But we as athletes, I think we push ourselves really, really hard. Even if it came from a coach or from a parent initially, we really internalize it. And I don't, no one was ever harder on me than I was on myself. - 100%. - And after. - I was a straight up bully to myself. For so long. - Yeah, we talked about this when we were doing the gymnastics. Like, and, and I think that's still something I struggle with, but that, that I was always my harshest critic. And that I think with the Olympics was something that, that really, really came out and it didn't matter if people were saying like, - You did great. - Yeah. And, and you know, you, you went to four and like, you're amazing. I was, I still felt like such a failure. But I, I think one of the hardest things that I had to learn and am still, I think we, people deal with is understanding whose opinion matters. - Truly matters. - And how to value those opinions more than all of the noise. And as women's sports again, gets more following and more engagement and more publicity, more comments, more everything. This is this kind of period that we're going to go through where it's like, okay, you wanted more fans. This comes with the territory. - Yes. There's going to be a lot of critics. There's going to be a lot of comments. That you don't like. - Yes. And people who have no idea what the fuck they're talking about. - Yeah. - And how do you, - Is that noise going to get to you? - Yeah. How do you not let that affect your mentality, your performance, your, just your life, your mental health. And, and that's where a lot of these young athletes as well, like, yes, they're used to social media, but it is very, very public. And they're getting so much more than I did during my career. Probably in the last two years, more than like my entire professional career. And that's one thing I think that is really important. Again, why you have this podcast and we talk about the pressures, the pressures we're putting on ourselves, but also what's coming from outside and how, how do you just remind yourself? Like it's, you know, it's your coach and your teammates, your people, your parents, whoever it may be like, those are the opinions that matter. And how do you, some players like you can't help it. You read the comments. It's like, it's this habit because really toxic cycle though. Yes. Yeah. But it's kind of, it's impossible to ask someone to not do like it's, you have to be very strong-willed to not. And sometimes the thing pops up and you just already see a few and you see your name and get sucked in. Yeah. So that's, that's something that I think too, like how can we really, really make sure that our young athletes are yeah. Maybe educated, informed. What are some resources in terms of limiting, some of that noise or again, and some people are saying terrible things and that is something that needs to be addressed, but how do you handle the, the criticism and being so public and your performance just being ripped apart or being celebrated so much? Everyone said I was doing amazing. Why aren't I starting next week? Yeah. Well, because the coach didn't think that you did what he or she needed you to do. And this is just all part of the game that is changing so much. Yeah. And being thrown under a microscope all the while, trying to keep your head above water. And you can't perform at your best. The social media stuff is absolutely absurd. I think, especially being in it. Thankfully I've created and curated a very beautiful community of humans that thankfully protect me from a lot of hate. Like I don't get a ton knock on wood. I don't get a ton of hate unless the video like goes viral or something where I'm like hitting new audiences and stuff. But wow. Wow. People just write whatever they want out there. Sheesh. New insecurities get unlocked for sure. The less they know you, the more personal terrible things they're going to write about you, which doesn't make any sense. No, it really doesn't. But I, I, I did hear from someone once who was pretty like established in their social media career. They said if I didn't want to switch lives with somebody, I shouldn't care about what they think. Wow. Yeah. Wow. Crazy. That is a very good perspective. And that really changed my perspective on a lot. And it helped me realize to like, keep your circle as close as possible. Yeah. Because if you don't know what you're talking about, because when you are making a shitload of money and you are getting opportunities that people want to be a part of, and you have agents to, you know, trying to get, get on your back and ride your coattails, like you do need to keep people in your corner that, you know, authentically love you and support you no matter what, and are going to be there when the money dries up and are going to be there when the opportunities aren't knocking anymore. And I think the transition as sport will be so much smoother when you have your worth outside of it. Yeah. And I think that's, why you seem so. so beautifully put together post retirement because you've spent all those years stepping out of yourself, being a leader, leading humans and not just athletes, but also investing time in yourself that had nothing to do with your sport, investing in your identity and developing that where when it was time to finally close that door, yes, of course it was so painful. And I'm sure you still probably deal with sad moments every now and again, but like your worth is not just being a soccer player. You're an incredible content creator. You're an incredible speaker. You're an advocate for so much of what women's sports represents. Like you've developed so much outside of just being Allie Riley, the athlete. And I truly think that's why your transition was so smooth. And maybe that's just me being, you know, outside looking in. Of course, there's a lot that happens behind the scenes and that's why we have this podcast to talk about those things that people don't see, but I could not applaud you more for even knowing you for such a short span of time. I already know like you're going to make such an incredible impact on the sport and on women's sports in general. So thank you for saying that. I think that would be one of my biggest pieces of advice for these women who are playing is to really try to work on understanding who you are and who you want to be. Yeah. And especially as the money is, is starting to come in, but knowing that at some point you have to do something else and there will be so many more opportunities than there were before, but also nothing is ever linear. Like everyone's going to go through some big challenge, whether it is coming to the end of your career or an injury rights back in the middle, or someone saying something about you publicly or. Being criticized or whatever it may be. And exactly like you said, knowing who you are working on yourself, knowing who your people are, and it's not the people are just going to blow smoke up your ass. Like you can find that on the internet. You can, um, just talk to chat GPT. Yeah. Hit me up for a sec. Yeah. Thank you. Yeah. Give me all the words of affirmation. Yes. Um, she does a great job. Yeah. It's really knowing, um, like you said, like who's going to be there for you when the chips are down. And I think for most athletes, when you retire, it really feels like the chips are down. And so to be prepared for that moment and to have confidence in who you are will help you overcome and start something new. Yeah. When you did have those devastating moments that really took you to a darker place, who helped you get out of it? Lucas has been just my ride or die, obviously. Um, he's been around for, yeah, for nine years. Wow. So, and that's really when coming back to the U S and with the having the home world cup and a lot of the pressure that went with that. And then of course, Paris and angel city and these really life changing moments for better or for worse. Um, and he, he also played soccer. So he's someone that I know, like he gets it. He's like, do you want to, do you want to talk about it? Do you want to analyze it? But he also knows that I'm so hard on myself. And my parents, my mom can be really critical, but I know she's my number one and she'll be there no matter what. And I can say like, I don't want to talk about the game. I just need to have a nice dinner. I just need to be home. Um, that that's one of the reasons I think that the fire and my family losing their house in the fire was also very like, yeah, I had no idea. Yeah. So a year ago ish. Um, yeah. In which city? In Palisades. Oh yeah. So that was another talk about like the injury and the fire and yeah, it was a lot. We got married like three days after the fire. So this has been a crazy, crazy couple of years and family to me and it can be your chosen family, but these are the people who are going to be so honest. You also can say like, I'm having a bad day. I don't, I don't want to talk about this or can we just do this? Can we just exist together? Yeah. So I think losing the house was really hard. Cause that's where I would go after a game, whether we won, whether he lost, whatever happened, I could just be around my family, be around my parents and, and Lucas and just exist. We didn't have to talk about it. Yeah. Hit the reset button. Yes. And I could invite some teammates over or whatever. So I think that made it even more challenging because that was part of my routine and something. Losing that home base. Yeah. Um, but that's just showed me how like the community and everyone has felt like they've been a part of my family. Going through this. And there are so many angel city fans who also were affected. They rallied around you. Yeah. And, and I realized that like, it is about the people and no matter where we are. And now me and Lucas live with my mom and dad. We rented a place together. Yes. Oh my gosh. Yeah. So just get ready when you come over for dinner. It won't just be me and Lucas. So excited. And that's a reality TV show. Honestly, it would do big things because my parents are wild, but that's just being together. That, that is what I've needed through all of this. And my parents came to Paris, even though they hadn't left LA when I was withdrawn from the team. Really? Oh my gosh. They said we're coming. Well, yeah. So we had this kind of weird, again, I cried a lot, but this weird vacation, like family vacation. I haven't had a time, like time to do that in a decade. So me and Lucas and my parents like had this like time in France together. Um, and yeah, that's the fire, the Olympics, the fire. My injury. Um, my mom was diagnosed with leukemia. So we've like, we've been going through a lot, but we have each other and we have this amazing community and like, that's everything. That's, that's how you get through any challenges. You have to lean on people. And I was someone who I was smiley Riley. Like I was someone who I felt everyone looked to me to always be positive and happy and like glass half full. And I am that person, but I realized I had to be vulnerable. And also share when I was not feeling good. And I was not, and that allowed me to be even happier and more myself because I was able to, you weren't masking. Yes, exactly. And so that's, I've, I've never been able to hide anything from my, my family and from Lucas. Like they, they know everything that's going on in my life, but, um, that, that was a big lesson I learned. Um, when I was playing for Chelsea and I was injured and I just had the hardest time and I realized I actually have to talk about it and tell people. So that's another one of my big pieces of advice. And you're not bringing your teammates down. Yes. You're bitching about, you know, this girl gets to do that. And like, she's playing and I'm not like that can start to be a drain on a team for sure. But if you are genuinely having a tough time and it could be about playing time, it could be about anything, but you got to find your people. It's not in the locker room. It's not in the shower. After training, you find your people and you know, this is not going to bring my team down. It's not going to bring my colleagues, whatever you're doing in place. There's a time and place. And, and, and a person or people for that. And that's like, again, when you go back to like, those are your people. Yeah. How's your mom doing now? She's good. She's doing a lot better. Yes. Yes. We're just like, she's immunocompromised. So we're like just trying to keep her, you know, but no, she's good. She's good. You're a rock dude. I, I mean, I think that's, it's a superpower, but it's also, it can lead to, again, like you said, a lot of struggle when you're known as Smiley Riley and you have to keep this look up and you have to be this person, this leader. And I was, I really was curious. I think it's actually on my questions for our dear athlete segment, but how do you keep this leadership role up when you're struggling with things behind the scenes? Yeah, it is leaning on the people who, you know, and being honest. Yes. And you know, this is not leaving the room. This is not now going to leak into the team or anything like that. This is really just being honest about how you're feeling and, and being open and really asking for help. It's not bitching. It's asking for help. This is what I need in this moment. It's asking for support and that's framing. It is important, especially if you are going to talk to someone who like also plays on the team and can empathize and understand where you're coming from. Yes. But definitely if you need help and if you need support, ask for it. Yeah. Please, please. People can't read your mind. And like, we're also, because we're conditioned to be so tough all the time and to not be vulnerable. Like we can fake it pretty well, really well. And we can also perform at an extremely high level while still going through a lot of shit. I think I performed better when I was going through shit because I was like my only outlet. Exactly. And I think a lot of, a lot of athletes would resonate with that. So it is really like, but it's not sustainable for a long period of time and things can build up. And also it is, it can affect like your relationships and also it can get to a point too, like where if you get to used to get used to feeling a certain way that you don't notice, like, that's what happened to me when I was depressed with my injury, because I was like, what do you mean? Like, I've been sad and unable to sleep and walk for so long. Like, of course I'm not going to socialize. And I'm like, finally spoke to someone. They're like, you're depressed. Like this is, these are signs of depression that you don't want to socialize anymore. And like, you're so worried about like having pain and all of these things. And like, there were some key signs. That I wasn't aware of, but I just, it had gone on for so long that I was like, what do you mean? This is my normal now. Yeah. Yeah. wow where did the struggle bleed the most where did it show up because obviously you still performed you still kept um i think especially when this when it got really bad with my injury it was that i and coinciding with like the olympics and losing the house like i in february of last year i i didn't want to like i would just lie in bed all day after training so i'd go and i would work my ass off and i would do my rehab and i would cheer on my team at training and i would cry and i would lie in bed and i didn't want to see my parents i didn't want to go to dinner with lucas like i couldn't cook like there's not like things that bring me so much joy i could not do yeah and that was when i again like shared that with a psychologist and started working with the club in terms of like let's let's let's take a step back like i needed to get away i needed to take some time off away from the team away from soccer and then that actually allowed me to restart my rehab and i think that's why i really was able to get back on the field because i like acknowledged what was happening and we made some adjustments to my training times and to how much exposure i was getting to the team and to all these things that were actually contributing to my depression yeah and uh that yeah again it's because i i shared it but it was like imagine if you didn't yeah it's like such a scary thought to i always say that too i'm like imagine if you didn't tell somebody yeah i mean that's where things go really really wrong really fast and you can only keep it up for so long especially in such a high pressure situation like you where you're on a massive stage you're under a big microscope people are picking you apart you're a lot weaker than normal you can't take the criticism the same way like it's gonna hit deeper yeah because it's just it's inevitable it's something's got to go something's gonna crack so i'm glad that we climbed out of that yeah i'm really proud of you thank you it's not easy thank you it's not an easy feat no no it definitely isn't and especially because of what you said we are seen to be these beacons of strength yeah and i'm so glad we're changing this like stigma around mental health and especially i think male athletes sharing that they struggle with they have mental health yeah challenges and that they also feel pressure and they also feel like failures because i think uh in sport in general it's something where we we have these young people looking at us and thinking they need to act a certain way they've got it all together yeah really really unhealthy and it will limit them from being the athletes that they could be as well so i i can agree more because i think a lot of times two people think well it's this is all so luxurious and glamorous and you see you know these incredible athletes doing incredible things and making all this money or what we think they're making all this money all this money and you know they get to the to the place that they're they've been striving to get to and it's not everything it's you know chalked up to be and you're like i'm done i'm really curious to know you know like i think in the next coming years will social media hinder that expectation will people only see the highlight reels and then not really truly understand what goes into it and the grit and the grind and the struggle and then just give up yeah well that's again why these conversations are so important and why i'm so glad that we are seeing so normal to struggle it's okay to fail like yes because we're human we're trying we are we're just girls yes exactly exactly and we cry and we have bad days yes i used to think it was so bad to cry and now i cry all the time no honestly because that's what you're just the way i have to get it out i'm like i will literally crash out otherwise if i don't let it out in an emotional way like yeah i'd rather do that than lash out on someone i love like exactly let it flow it feels good it feels so good it feels good after it feels bad i'm like the cortisol is right now it's so healing oh well i am just so glad that we could connect i mean we've already connected so much in our you know field chat and everything um with the sports spot but like the second i talked to you and met you i was like i really hope she wants to come to the studio and do this of course i was so excited when you told me yeah it was just so perfectly aligned with my beliefs and my you know vision for what this podcast could be and so i'm really glad that people are buying into it and and want to continue to help you know add to such an incredible movement hopefully no definitely you're you're you're a huge part of this movement and i think hearing the similarities from different athletes and different sports and male female like that's really important and then also the differences because we are all different and we go through different things and part of what we fought for is that these young athletes young people can be their authentic selves and feel included and feel welcome in the space of sport or whatever and so that's why the conversations are so important and your questions are so good and you know i'm happy you you got me to talk about some hard stuff because it i really want anyone listening and if they hear and tell someone else so that like again they can meet challenges maybe in a better way than i did or that they feel more confident going into something just knowing that professional athletes feel the same way or just feel i don't know excited about the opportunities that are out there especially for women in sports now yeah it's booming it is and if you're not on board you're getting left behind exactly we're missing out on the money yes oh i'm so here for it okay we gotta hop into a little segment dear athlete which is where we get to offer our advice to the younger generation of athletes perfect first question is what's your go-to mindset reset after a tough game or a mistake i tell myself i have an opportunity so i try not to think too much about what the mistake led to if we lost if we conceded a goal and because i can run over those mistakes and the negative self-talk can just go go go yeah now i have an opportunity to learn love to not do it again we have another game i have training tomorrow i can analyze my performance why did this happen and i can be better and if i do that that's literally all i can do yeah i can't change what happened last night control your troubles yeah love it i was gonna say kind of the same thing progression versus performance i think we are so quick to think about what place did we get what medal did we get what title are we at where are we ranked well we can't control any of that especially not in gymnastics anyways like it's all subjective so if a judge doesn't like you because maybe you weigh a little bit more maybe you your toes aren't as pointed as they could be maybe you're not as flexible as they would personally like that that's not in your control so understanding that and understanding what is in my control is my attitude how i am with my teammates how i respond to feeling like i've let myself down how do i prepare better for next time those all are empowering feelings versus defeating feelings and i've never felt more empowered than stepping into that gratitude space and i've never felt more empowered than stepping into that gratitude space and seeing all the things i can't control it's like look at this like you can leave this opportunity like you said feeling like there's lessons to be had and there's growth to be had and that's that's exciting there's always more growth to be had and i think having that mindset is just like the most empowering feeling especially as a female athlete because there's there's never that ceiling yeah even though we may think it so i think that's cool second how do you know when it's time to walk away from your sport oh my gosh um in my case when you physically cannot walk when you can't do it anymore you literally cannot walk i think basically that but when and i i don't like saying it's like between risk and reward or the the benefits and the like but what i was getting out of the game versus i think what i could get out of life it started to become very clear that i wasn't able to be my best self and give all of me to the sport anymore because i was in so much pain and because um i started to feel like the the the energy i'd be able to give if i wasn't focusing so many hours and again not wanting to do too many extracurriculars because i was saving i was protecting my body preserving so much yes it was so much self-preservation and not a lot of living yeah and i think i one of the things i'm most proud of is that every day i got to play soccer for my entire life i loved it i have no like oh i wish i had enjoyed that while i knew no every game i felt lucky to play every training i gave a hundred percent of what i had that day like i know that for a fact so i was able to feel that contrast very very acutely that now i i'm starting to in order to still be that person because i I will, I will always be that teammate and that player. I have nothing left for my husband, for my friends, for my parents. Like I have nothing left and that's, I had to give something to the person, the woman, the maybe hopefully mom, like the person that I would spend the other hours of the day. And also the person that I would spend the rest of my life with. I'm like, I have to give to her now. And I just, I knew, I knew, I knew I had to. You were feeling called to a different era. Yes. I wanted to feel like I was living. Yeah. I think a lot of it too, is when you are injured, we forget, like you're forced to be in a very selfish space. You're constantly thinking about yourself. You're constantly thinking about how can I feel better on the field? How can I be more prepared? How can I do this, this, this? And I don't think you're a selfish person. So like having that kind of forced perspective to be like, I have to focus on me constantly. I'm sure it was probably really painful to be like, I want to give to my friends. I want to give to my family, but I'm forced to give so much to myself right now because I'm in survival mode. Yeah. I mean, that is really, really how it felt like constantly in this fight or flight. And I, community is everything to me and people is like, people mean everything to me. And so, yes, I was, I was giving a lot to my teammates and they still mean a lot to me and I will still continue to hype them up and be there for them. But yes, like you said, my family and like the community and just again, like to be able to authentically be like, I feel good and I'm happy. And I was like masking a little bit because it was so important to me to be a leader for the team, even though I was in pain and all of these things. And it just starts to really wear on you. And I think that's where I really wanted to make a commitment after, of course, like everything I'm preaching to young girls and to my teammates about like, be your authentic self, say, if you need help, like all these things, like I can't, I'm not even doing that myself. I'm not able to do that. If I keep going down this path and like trying to extend, prolong my career. But I think again, I, I also played so long that I was like, I've done everything that, everything realistic that, um, I wanted to achieve. I was able to achieve. So I was able to, to have that. And that makes me really lucky. I know that you got that closure. You gave so much of yourself to the sport and I'm sure, I mean, now you're still giving so much of yourself to the sport, but in a different capacity. And I think now you are truly living authentically. I think so too. And that's what I want for everybody. Like that's what I'm fighting for. So that whether you're, you know, a young girl who wants to, play sport or like, if you're a player in the league who we want to have better conditions and resources for, it's like, so you can be yourself and get paid and do what you love and have all the opportunities in the world because women deserve those opportunities. So I think again, like to be able to live authentically and something that I've preached so long and I knew I, I wouldn't be able to do that. So I'm glad you can feel that I'm authentic self right now. I feel like, well, one, we would not, be aligned if you were masking like that. Let me tell you, I can see right through that shit. I did it for a long time, but like, also, I mean, I think it's such a beautiful full circle moment to know that you gave so much to your sport, but I think the sport, as much as you think, maybe when you were playing the sport needed you and your team needed you, I think the sport needs you a lot more now in this capacity. That is a great way to look at it. And it's a really cool thing. You're welcome. So now you can go to bed. Knowing that, you know, you can sleep well at night, knowing that you are really stepping into such an important role for the sport and for female athletes as a whole, you're going to continue to be such a cool advocate. And I'm so excited that I'm here along for the ride because you're such an inspiration to me. And I really, truly believe it was divine timing that we met at this time of our lives. And you launched a podcast literally a week after me or two weeks after me. Wild. Wild. Yes. Literally getting ready to get onto the field to do the second half of the sports or no, no, just the first. We literally just to go to the gym. I wanted to ask you all these questions. And you're like, actually, I'm going to ask you questions because I have a podcast. I was like, wait, what? So obviously you have to come on Kelly O'Hara and my podcast. Would you have me? I'm not even a soccer player. Of course, because you're also going to get Kelly to do gymnastics. OK, OK. I'm here for it. Let's do it. No, we're. Can you tell them what your podcast is so that they can tune in? Because I know that we've definitely got some new. Soccer fans just from meeting you and getting to know your personality. I'm sure people are so strapped in for the season, so I want them to know. OK, well, playing soccer does not feel like a life or death situation as gymnastics does. However, if you want to hear about soccer and hear. Olympian World Cup champion Kelly O'Hara and me talk about soccer and women's sports. We have a podcast called Time Wasting on Just Women's Sports, and it's out every Tuesday, wherever you listen to your podcasts. I love it. So then you can listen to her podcast on Tuesday and then mine on Wednesday. Period. There you go. That's your new routine, you guys. It's going to be a really fun season, so I'm super excited to follow along. You're doing amazing things. I can't wait to continue to girl boss next to you. I can't wait to do content when we're at an Angel City game together. So stay tuned for that. Stay tuned and hopefully we'll see you in person. And Angel City game if you're a local to L.A. Yes. I love you guys so much. Thank you for tuning in and I will see you next Wednesday. Bye. Gracie. Did you get that? Whoa, that is so fun. What is happening? My heart just stopped. Wow. Oh, my God. I don't know why I'm so surprised.