Giggling about peptides, pimples, and football players

(upbeat music) - Sup, Giggler? - Very picture Wi-Fi. - Manifest that shit. We can't be mad at each other. (laughing) (upbeat music) - I mean, the day just got away from me. - What's up, my glass blowing gigglers? We should do that in a hand-in-page, try new things. I've never blown a glass once. - I have a feeling like a lot of people have never blown a glass. (laughing) - It's not like a thing that people are out here just doing every day. - I feel like people who are like going through something are like, I'm in my glass blowing era. - Yeah, I wonder how you get into-- - How you get interested in it. - Yeah, and it's like, you know, there's glass, we should blow it. - Or like, hey, if you, and I only know this from the movies to be home Alabama, like if you electrocute something on the beach or mix glass. - I have no idea. - Like a pole. Woman is some of the weight. (laughing) Really suffer. Quick house keeping, the only house keeping we do. - But we're so sad of it. - Sad of it. (laughing) So we moved our Dublin show in Ireland to an arena. 'Cause the original one, y'all sold out really quick and we were able to move the tickets. We're doing a lot of admin right now. We're adding a show in Los Angeles. - Okay. - It's dropping. And New York City shows announcing this week. - This week. - This week. - Okay, right now I remember recording. - It's Sunday, I just chugged a dirty chalote. I'm about to fuck up this pod. How are you? - I'm good, how are you? - You said you have stuff to say. I know you have stuff to say when you walk in and you immediately take out your notes up and you start scrolling with your long ass finger. - Well, one, I have a pimple on the side of my nose but it's on this side, which I'm so happy about. - Why? - Because you're pulling me from the side. (laughing) - So I woke up this morning and I was like, don't even worry about it. - It's about it. - So that was one thing. - But I love your pimples, it makes you so down to earth. - Thank you, it makes me relatable. - I don't like that. (laughing) - Okay, so this weekend I watched so many different things. - Oh. - A lot of love based things. - Oh. - I went scripted, I went, I went scripted, I've done so much anthropology, I've done so much research on humans. - I watched the new Margaret Quelley movie. - A lot of your life. - Having multiple loves. - Didn't know what it was about, just saw her clicked it, was like, yeah, play. - Yeah. - Such a sad movie. - No, I hate when that happens. - Can you be warning? - Well, it was the first movie I've seen that like, really encapsulated COVID in a very real, - Yeah. - Not like apocalyptic way, like in a very real like, specific way. - Yes. - Not just like COVID was fucked up. - And so you watch this movie and you're like, oh my god, like, there really is people out here just like being in love and like, like, you're really doing it. - And then I switch it over to Love Is Blind. - And you're like, nevermind. - Back to earth. - That was a movie, that was a Hollywood movie. - No fan fiction. - Let's get to earth. - Wait, I've just seen the clips. Love Is Blind, every season has something wild that goes around the internet. - Boston changed my brewing chemistry. Boston has, there's only five episodes out. Never in the history of Love Is Blind have people seen each other and know her has been like, I don't think so. (laughing) - We've been, I saw the clip of the girl with the guy who called himself Kennedy and I couldn't tell that she like didn't like it. Like she was rolling his eyes, but I'm like, who doesn't do that? - She was in a classic case of like, frozen. - Yeah, like, wait, what? - No, but I feel like a lot of boyfriend girlfriends, the girlfriend's annoyed with him, but that's like their stick. - Yeah. - Like, she's like, I can't with him, he's so annoying, I need him. - Yeah. - So it's hard to tell. - This is real. - This is real. - Oh yeah, he said he looked like Mitt Romney. - Well, it was, remember when the one girl said that she kind of looked like Megan Foxx? - And she did. - And she did. - And Megan Foxx was like, and you do? - Yep. - This guy tried to say, you look like Jude Law. - I go. (laughing) - I go, I actually don't think you've ever seen a picture of Jude Law before. - I'll never get the kind of, the level of hate. - No. - But if you live in Boston and this is why we should add another show, the girls are struggling because the men are so scary and not scary in a like, I think you'll kill our whole family. - They're just sure. - Once you get fired from your job at some point. - Awesome. - Some more. - It's the water, the tea water. - They're all sitting down, so I can't ever really tell how tall they are. But it's like a, it's, they don't know who they are. Like, that's the only way I can describe it. They don't know who they are. And the way I picked up on it is they would say something then the girl would say something and then they'd change their opinion. - They'd be like, yeah, no, yeah, yeah, I agree. - And I'm like, but you didn't just have that, but know who you are. - I'm, yes, like, say with the chat. - Have a conviction or something. - The men all do kind of look the same. And I'm, I don't understand. - When I'm confused, what does she think a guy from Boston was gonna look like? That's what I'm throwing about. Like, it's not like he came out and he had like two heads. Like, that's, chat GBT man from Boston, it's that man. - I don't think she actually broke up with him because of the way he looked. I think once she got in person with him, his aura was so rampant. - But is it the point of love is blind that you get that aura first? - Can I say something? - Love is not blind. - It's not. - It's never in the history of life, will it be blind? - It's not blind. Like, if I don't want to fuck you, I'm not marrying you, that's insane. - But like, I feel like you're supposed to get people's aura on the pod and be like, even if he's ugly, at least he's nice and he's funny and he's cool. - Well, I think she was like, if he in the pod, and then once it was in person, she was like, yeah, everything you've said was alive. - That's her looking at the producers being like, fuck you mother fucker. - He was like a classic guy that yeah, had like longer hair, maybe he's a little bit taller than the average man and so just lied. - And you seen that before. - Oh, so you're saying he just like, he just made things up, he wanted to get picked. - Yeah, he was just like, he was a pick me. - Yeah, he was just like, I'm so rich and I'm so good looking, and right when she saw him, she was like, you got me, you got me there. (laughs) You got me there. - He had a rich organ looking so. - And the things he was saying, it was someone caused playing rich. - Yeah. - Where it was like a rich person, I feel like just wouldn't say that. - I saw Trixie Mattel. - Yeah. - I don't see what actual love was born. I see the people making fun of it. So I have to kind of decide what really happened. But Trixie Mattel was saying that someone was like, do you, are you like pro choice? And they were like, no, and they're like, are you racist? And they were like, yeah. And she's like, really important things. Like, do you believe in the same religion? I don't know. And then she was like, okay, you're my person. (laughs) It was insane. What was that? Which one were those? - Hey, I forget, honestly, which guy that was. He was like, I didn't want to get the COVID vaccine, but I'm not like an anti-vaxxer. I have other vaccines. And she was like, yeah, I just think in like that situation, there was a lot of misinformation. And I chose to trust like the expert scientist and not like this random guy who isn't a scientist. - So by the way, the men love talking about, what's the stuff? Everyone's injecting right now peptides. - Yeah, same guys who are like, yeah, I don't trust putting any vaccines in me. But you're putting made up things that have no science behind it from a website that your bro snap-chatted you. - Wait, can I tell the pod something? I ordered one of the peptides. - I was weirded out that you had it. - Oh, so up your alley. - Okay. It's so hard. - You know, I can't right now, 'cause I'm on the bench. - I texted a friend, I said, hey, I, but you know someone. And she goes, of course, I don't. - Everyone's got a hook up. - Some girl texted me and she was like, hey, what do you want? And I'm like, I don't know. The one that makes you beautiful. (laughing) - The one that puts sparkles and butterflies come here. - She was like, cool, coming to your address right now. Gets to my house, I go, what am I doing? - I go, what the fuck am I doing? - The sorbote was shaking. - I didn't even, I didn't even open the package. I didn't even get my box cutter out to open it. I chucked it right in the trash, 'cause I go, what the fuck was I thinking? We don't know where this came from. I have a friend, I'm not gonna expose her, but she was like, yep, you can go through a doctor and it's really expensive, but you go through a non-doctor. And it's not expensive. I'm like, look, I did this already. I had a Miami med spot. I'm just gonna tell you not where that one turned out. - Not worth it. - Also, even if it does make your skin look glowy for like three months, we don't know the long-term side of us. - Also once you get off of it, it goes away. So anyway, I digress, I got us off topic. My thing is, when the guy was like, I'm a horrible person, and she was like, okay, I still like you. - I did not judge her, 'cause we've all done that. However, normally it's 'cause the guy is six, seven and can carry me around while he's being an asshole. This is the whole point of love is blind is, so you don't fall for the tall athletic guy. - There was also a guy in there who like could tell, he was picking between two girls. He could tell one of them was hotter than the other. - How? - The questions he was asking. - Okay, I could tell. - He was at hip-to-waist ratio. - He was like, have you ever dated athletes? And she was like, yeah, and he goes, what's sport? And she goes football and basketball. And he goes, I can tell that like you'd be my type. - And like, a girl who is dating a football player and a basketball player, yeah, I'm sure she's gorgeous. - Well, I dated a football player, and I wouldn't call myself gorgeous, but I have two. Thank you, but I do want athletics. Yeah, he dated me because he was like our kids are gonna don't so in the Ben diagram there in the middle is fat ass You're my you're my number one supporter of your ass. You guys men are so simple. I'm no better within a man But not enough people talk about your body They don't just have something to grab on to and men are just like yes. Yeah, yeah I mean, I don't know how I do in the pod because I'm because I'm yappy. What do you mean if I was doing love is blind? I just don't do any crowd work. I know so How do you put the tampon? Wait, I have to make that If I have diarrhea, what would you what would you do? No, those are the questions you need wait Can I give them questions for love is buying because they're not asking the right question. You're not asking the right things I do wonder how involved I Would assume that the producers are more involved when they couple up than in the pods because in the pods It's like okay, once I had a producer tell me I told him I liked someone and right before he walked away, he said I Just don't see that for you and walked away Now like my best friend wouldn't say that to me But like having like an adult in the room who's in charge say that to you. I was spinning like I was spinning I was like and of course they're like leaning them towards you. They think is gonna connect to who or who's not gonna connect And it's gonna make a more explosive season Boston is just particularly interesting I don't know why the men have really intense egos and then they're like and for no reason because like one girl was like What do you do when he was like nothing like you had a job? You guys we do stereotype states because we've been to all these states Like he did have a job he worked on like a boat or something and he was gone for like 10 weeks at a time and she was like, okay, but like how do you have a family and children and he was like Well, then like I just won't work as much and then like maybe you can come with me and and the kids can cut like Sir what the fuck like one of the overarching themes I think of this season specifically and I've seen it so much Especially just like at our age men saying I want a wife and kids But they don't want to change any single thing about their current life They want to add in a wife and kids and like that just doesn't What the fuck are you talking about? Yes, so if you don't change anything that means your wife has to literally change everything and then you wonder why When you breathe she looks annoyed and then like she has the kid and then you have the nerve to be like She's so different She used to be so fun. It's like Okay, yeah, because for a year she had a human sucking all of the nutrients out of her body Then she had it Now her body is trying to get back and you're like want a margarita? Like no, she doesn't want a margarita. She wants to sit for one more I think about how society this is our serious Sunday episode. Yeah, society leaves women for dead after they have their baby They're like get your eyes back to work. No, we don't have help for you. No, we don't have health insurance for you We have nothing for you. I feel like if men were the ones having babies They would all be in a kingdom. If men got their periods They'd be out of work for that whole week when women become moms and they're having trouble everyone's like You're good. Let me take it to one more topic. Yes, the Victoria secret fashion show. So it's it's today It's today they're filming it today, but it's not airing today, right? Oh, okay I think it airs later because they edit it. I was there last year in person. Yes. Where was it in New York in New York? Missy Elliott performed. It was very very fun. I know as I found like a $16 vintage Victoria secret slip on eBay. Remember when I wore that yes I think they switch like production companies or something. Okay. It's what I'm like. They're going bigger this year I would assume they're going bigger this year because I've seen a lot of people posting like that. They're going to the show And did you see the one Victoria secret model Romeo there's multiple so Romeo came out It didn't a did a video being like that she got cut from this year that she's not in the show She's been in the show for like so many years and that they're leaning more towards influencers than models I mean tiktok is losing their mind. They're losing their mind. Yeah, and as someone who loves watching hot people on TV I feel bad for the model's justice for the model. She was like she'd been training for it. Yeah. I think she was more like I'm a mother You could have just told me months ago. You weren't going to pick me. Yeah, I wasn't like she's probably working out like three times a day in their industry They are at the top. They are the elite Victoria secret modeling is similar to a body building contest Yeah, you know how like right before like you're not drinking water like you're cutting down you're getting the tan Like it's that yeah, you're these girls haven't smelled a carb. I do think that there are influencers that Should be like I do think there are some that I'm like I also I love that it's like when angel Reese was on when I tell you her body was Insane I am pro bringing also influencers on because we live in a different time It's a different world people are gonna watch to watch their favorite influencer We don't have the model culture like we did 10 years ago So it's just different influencers are going to be there get over it Victoria secret is a Big business and they're making monetary decisions of how do they sell more Victoria secret pink Yeah sports bras Totally and also I say all of this but in the grand scheme of things who gives a Victoria secret fashion show isn't in charge of making me feel good. No, you're so right, you know Like so right, so if there's girls up there that you don't want to look at then don't watch it I personally love watching people on TV. I'll turn the market quality I said I don't even know what this movie is about but I like the way she looks You guys want to do something so upsetting. I was in Seriously, I'm studios. Yeah, you left early per usual. No, I didn't leave Early the meeting was over my Uber came over this there's something about you We're the second and beatings over somehow. There's always a car right there. Yeah, you've never had any waiting time between the two I don't know how you do it. I saw you called there. You do You can send these wrapping up So I'm really good at wrapping things up Like I have a mood like did you see me grab my bag during that? Okay, thank you So she as someone's talking she starts going Okay, thank you. Don't you start doing the like We're done. We did it because my problem is I I feel like I give constant. I'm excited to be here energy Which I'm not but it's like my what I do and you go Okay I do it since and she's like Yeah, thank you. Well, well, yeah awesome But we got stuck in a beginning conversation where the weather was going too long You know when you do a little back and forth about the weather and then it keeps going and you're like Oh, now we're with the weather channel like we talked for 10 minutes small talk about the weather with someone How did that even happen? I was waiting for you to be like Fanny like let's start the meeting. No, there should be a rule after like you get two things about the weather I feel like I need to accomplish like three more things before like people on zooms are afraid of me Because and once I get there and I'm thinking it's around like 43 44 once I get there I want everyone to know when you get on a zoom with me I don't want any intros and a winter does I don't want any intros. I don't want any small talk right when we get on Start the day. I'm meeting you guys don't want to be there neither do I we have other things to do We don't need six people to go around and say where they are and how it looks like outside And how it makes them feel and how it's going to be and how it was After you left I was like alone at Sirius XM and I was like okay before I call my car I might as well go to the bathroom because I just get nervous. I went up to pee and not have a bathroom near me That's that's my phobia in life. Wait when was this like two weeks ago? Oh, okay. I thought you were talking about yesterday I was like we walked together. I know okay two weeks ago There's like a whole bunch of people walking and a person goes into the bathroom Okay, then a security guard stands in front. Oh, and this is like a big bathroom like everyone uses this bathroom So I don't know if I just like look confident or whatever, but I kind of was like excuse me like I'm going to the bathroom Yeah, like what unless it's dangerous in there like I have to pee right now So I like walked around the security guard and kind of looked me up and down and I just was like hi Yeah, and I walk in and I see like a A woman with like a little dog and she's like talking to the dog in the bathroom And for some reason I just thought it was a real housewife And I was like which real housewife is walk around the security guard in Sirius XM like you got to be kidding me is a parasol tone I just went to the bathroom and I was like I'm not dealing with whatever's going on yeah, and I like watch my hands I keep my head down and she came out. I was watching her hands And then she like keeps the door open for me, but I literally don't even look who it is like I was like in my own world Walk out someone turns to me they go. Did you say anything to her? And I was like no she goes It's margot quality It was a bathroom with her for five minutes. Hannah! I like don't make eye contact with people. What kind of dog? It was like a cute old great dog like tiny little But she was just like well the dog was like getting in my stall and stuff and I was like this real housewife needs to get in No, but I was like of course of course like I just got in I was like I don't know what's going on on. I just, I, I didn't know she was promoting her movie. So in a way, shout out Margaret. We love you. I love her. But also, she didn't need me bothering her in the bathroom. No, she actually probably preferred. And I think I, I knew that deep down that if I made eye contact with her and I knew her, I didn't want to talk and if I didn't know her, she didn't want me to talk. We didn't talk about girls coming back. Well, we announced our, our music video dropped, I think the same day they announced. And it was such a beautiful day. Yeah. What a cosmic New York City. Just lovely moment. Did you see the thing where everyone was like, keep, Gen Z, keep your hooks off this goddamn show? I feel like Gen Z's trying to like make it their own because they, they all just watched it like two weeks ago. No, they better not. They better not. You know who I love? Yeah. Just my lover. Like I can't keep my eyes off her. If Lena Dunham, it like happens to stumble upon this clip of the pod, I really also agree. I don't want any cameos. Unless it's us. But I really, I don't want any cameos because it almost makes like, it almost takes you out of like the script. Yeah, the scripted world they've created. It's also like if you do one cameo, then you have to do every cameo. They're bringing girls back. It's their ages right now. So it's 30s early 40. No, like 37, 38, but they're probably I don't feel like they would even be connected to Gen Z, but they're all going to have like older jobs. So like they're going to be like managers somewhere and then they're going to have like the Gen Z people who work for them. Okay, fine. Fine. If we're like saying, I love you go in a world with no Gen Z in Brooklyn, New York. And I think it's only five episodes. So maybe because it's only five episodes, they do like a beautiful just only the characters, well, Lena will have a child who would be Gen Alpha. So maybe it's a lean more into Gen Alpha, which is even scarier than Gen Z. Gen Z's going to be mad. I don't stand with Gen Alpha. Gen Z's like Gen Alpha hasn't even known what girl's is. No. Very interesting. Very interesting. So we'll see how they do it. I'm just excited that it's getting the respect. It deserves because like everyone's like time, time, time, time for it. I'm like, time has to pass for people to be like, that was one of the greatest shows. Yeah. Girls. She was 23. Could you imagine if a 23 year old guy did anything? They'd be like, Oh, she's the greatest. She is the greatest of all time. That's like the director of back room. He's like a 23 year old. Lena Dunham should put Margaret Qualie in it. I love how you're casting director now. Yeah. Do you want to know something in a past life? I actually think I could have been a cast director. I was an agent. You were an agent because you're phenomenal. It's about in talent. And I could have been a casting director because I know. I mean, really? She's like, Thank you. Sorry. She's not pretty. Thank you. No, you'd be like, some oxen. Thank you so much. You didn't look up. I know. That's, but also you'd be a good director. I used to go on like model castings. I would know when I got it and when I didn't. And when I didn't get it, they were overly nice to me. Like, Oh, my God, you did so good. That's amazing. Yes. Perfect. And when they don't say anything to you, I would be like, I got that page. You just dropped some serious, serious, important tea because that's why I walk out of every audition being like, she got it, baby. Yeah. I let me tell those. I'm like, we're going to Hollywood. If I walked out and was like, they loved me. My mom would be like, and we didn't get that one. Like, yeah, I would know like, like a day at work when they liked you. They'd be like, okay, good. Check her off. Yeah, they'd be like, she's doing what you, okay, that's actually good. That's perfect. And if someone's really bothered with a thing, you're like, you're amazing. You're gorgeous. We love you so much. She's coming up. So like, keep your calendar. And then you never hear from them. Yeah. And that's life. So how do you think rejection as a child, even though your mom would lie to you most of the time. But like, you must have felt some rejection. How did that affect you? I love our Sunday series. I love our Sunday series series. You know, I'm sure it did affect me, but I don't know how. I haven't open to that. No, I actually really think I was like, kind of stupid, that I really don't think I realized it in the moment I was getting rejected. That was like some tennis girls were like, they weren't stupid. They just didn't think about like, when they lost, they just were like, whatever is fine. Yeah. Like, I've been very, like, I really feel like I've been like that my whole life, like even if I'm like, if I don't get something, I'm like, whatever, that's like not for me. Honestly, even when I didn't get summer house, I was like, okay, don't care. You're better than me at it. And we were talking about this earlier. Are you being like, things will work out as they should? Where I'm very like, I won't make it happen. It's supposed to happen. I won't force it. The only time I feel like that is with men. We're like, oh, really? See, it's funny. I don't feel like that with men. I'm like, go. Yeah, where I'm like, oh, you don't think it's working out. Oh, you don't think it's working out. Okay. I'll show you not working out. But that's just every time I chased a guy I've regretted it. Same. You've never. Of course. Because the second you get him, you go, oh, we fucked up. I go, wait, I actually made up your personality in my brain. You in fact, don't have that personality personality. But sometimes it's just a fun night out, like seeing a guy across the bar, making up who he is, holding the whole night, tricking him into thinking he saw you. Yeah. And then being like, oh, no, I'm stuck in the worst conversation I've ever had in my life. One of the best things after you break up with someone and like, you might feel like, oh, my God, I really didn't want to, but it was the right thing or like, no, I, or maybe even they broke up with you. One of the best feelings is then like, not only seeing them after, maybe not even seeing them, but knowing what they're doing after and realizing like, oh, yeah, I was the magic. Like, not only was I the magic, I was the, I was, I was your whole personality. What do you, what do you talk about now? Like stuff like that is like the message. Well, you know what they talk about me. Like your ears are just non-stop. Like, non-stop worrying. Um, I thought of a metaphor for dating. So as a New Yorker, I feel like, like, I've had a lot of apartments. Yeah. Like you go from apartment to apartment. And I was thinking about apartment. So you've really been in an apartment and you've been like, okay, it's not perfect, but it's good. And then you're like, I'm really comfortable here. And you're like, I can see myself for like, yeah, like, I'll just resign the lease. Yeah, you're like, I'm just staying here. This apartment is great. And you like come into, you're like, this is a great apartment. This is a really good apartment. But don't let this apartment go because I don't know if there's a better apartment out there. I'll find another apartment. You know how competitive it is. Yeah. It's getting an apartment. And then you're like, fine, I'll get another apartment. You start looking and you find it's only you're like, oh, this is the best apartment I've ever seen in my life. Your life is suddenly different colors. You wake up in the morning of the different, like, you don't even remember the old apartment. You think, how the fuck did I live in that shittacle apartment? You go, what unit was that again? What number was I? And then you're like, wait, the vibes were so bad in that apartment. I had no idea. No idea. And I was literally thinking about this just apartments recently. And I go, it's 100% dating. It's 100% dating. Cause like, you're like, yeah, like he sucks in a lot of ways. But like, we're good. Like, we're good. And then then you're with like an actual person who's good for you. And you're like, ah, I almost settled with the last one. Then you bring in your guarantor. And you're, they're like, are you sure about this apartment? My mom is like, I'm not signing for you. I'm not. This isn't the one. I'm, yeah, I'm not signing. My mom's not signing about me for this. So anyway, think about your apartment, you guys. Yeah. And no inventory because people, humans naturally can like, acclimate to a lot of things. Just know you don't have to acclimate. So I'm girl made a TikTok. This is like a while ago, but it stuck in my brain series some days. And it was, you don't get a reward for suffering. And I just think that's so true in dating, especially for our age and the girls that are single and our counterpart are, and I'm not saying this to like be mean, like statistically, like our counterpart and men are just like making less money than us. They're like, not, not don't have as good a job as us, whatever. They don't try as hard. They don't own homes. I forget what I was even saying. Honestly, I say all of this in the name of Jackson. I'm like, you're my sweet boy. I'm essentially like in love. But this is the thing too. I have a couple girls that'll message me and be like, I don't want to break up with him because I'll feel bad. Yeah. Now, let me tell you guys, I am the biggest people. Please are on the planet. Yes. Like to people I don't know. I will feel too horrible. Like, you can bring me a cheeseburger with shredded glass in it. And I'll be like, you did such a good job. Okay. So I'm like, yeah, that kind of people. Yes. But when it comes to my life, yeah, and men, you don't take shit. But I've dated some sweet angel men who I've really loved and cared for, but I knew deep down I was going to get distracted by other men. The second I was like, I want to kiss that man. Oh, that's like the biggest sign. So then I go, okay, now out of respect for the guy, I'm going to hurt him. But like, what am I going to do? Let him waste my life away. Yeah. No. And also he's going to find someone who's better for him. So you guys stop saying with guys because you feel like girls have been like, I don't know what he's going to do without me. Not your problem. Also, they're fine. I've broken up with a lot of men. And then like a month later, I'll be like, wait, why do I feel bad? They didn't even like me. Wait, he did it like genuinely. No, he had no idea who you were. He made it up in your head. Yeah. He made up who I was. I made up who he was. We did this dance for a little bit. And then I was like, okay. - Gotta go. - I read something that was like, you'll have three loves, which is super generalizing, but it's like your first love that you're like, oh my god, like this feels so real. And it is, but it's just like the beginning. - Yeah. - And you're too young to actually like grow together. - Okay, got mine. - Second one is you date someone who's abusive, ruins your life, makes you realize what you don't want. And you're like, I actually don't want it. - He was so fun though. - He was so fun. People liked him, he was really popular. - You had a really good time on a Saturday night. - You can't sleep, you're in no mind. - You have to go on Prozac. And then once you're kind of like over it, something will come to you even when you're like, I don't want this right now. - Yeah. - Yes. - And that like is, that did happen in my life. - It's so true. - Yes. - It really happened in my life. I was looking through old notes. I highly recommend when you're bored. If there's nothing on TV. I'm until like 2017. And I guess I had a bad break up and then I was going through a list of guys I dated and like why I ended it with them. - That's so, that's so me coated. - But you know I had two boy friends, two and a half, maybe three, who like I really loved. But I realized they were just my best friend. - Mm. - I would either do like best friends and then be like, I'm not attracted to you enough. I'm so sorry but like I love you. But like. - I only did that once and not my vibe, not my M.O. - I know but it was more like you're singing. It was one of your single and you just like, we're hanging out all the time and you're like, we have a friend group. - You're like, boy, I'm a girl, do we? - Yeah. - And then you're like, yeah. - Sweet, sweet man. - Yeah. - And then there's the ones who are like, if they could nuke the world they would. - Yeah. - Yeah, I had a couple of those. - Like you're like, I'm not safe. No one's safe. - No, there's a couple that if they texted me right now, I'd call a bodyguard. Like this is not gonna end well and I'm not safe actually. I'm not safe. Like, and I've said some crazy things on this podcast where I'm like, surely someone's gonna send a text being like, he knows you're doing your bio. I'm like, but I have the good news about having a podcast when you're in your early to mid 30s is that we could be talking about so many men when we reference an ex. - No, when I-- - And we are. - When I did my, when I went to the variety and I accepted the award for and talked about domestic violence, and the amount of X's that texted me, like, hey, hey, so proud of you, like all your accomplishments love it. Do you mind saying that it's not me? Like I had a lot of people be like, and like girlfriends being like, hey, I had to say that it wasn't this particular guy you dated. - Yeah. - But I was just like, figure it out. (laughing) - Sorry, that happened to you. Hope you're doing well. - Hope you made people thought you were the one when I said that's not me, that's not me. - That energy you're putting on. - That is not me. - That energy you're putting on to the world. - Speaking of energy and putting on to the world. - Doesn't ever come in that old couple that like, we love talking waiters. Like a waiter comes in and they're just trying to do their job and we're like, where are you from? (laughing) - Wait. - That is such a niche. - I bet. - I don't know how it happened. I feel like when the restaurant's quiet. - Set me a scene. Set me a scene. - Okay. - So it was like a Saturday night. - It was a Saturday, three p.m. - Okay. - And late lunch. - I realized I had a dinner lunch. - Before the dinner lunch. - Yeah, so I was like, I want a quesadilla and does a nice sit down. And Des is, what I do like about him is he loves small talk. - Yeah. - He loves talking about city planning. He loves neighborhood gossip. He loves to know what's going on. - He loves infrastructure. - Infrastructure of a town. - And he will overhear people talking and be like, what's going on in that coffee shop and what's happening here, what's the parkings, like he loves parking situations. He loves to, oh, I almost texted him about the DMV. - Oh, he was waiting for you to text him about the DMV actually. He's like, she should just text me 'cause I have it all ready. Des loves the DMV. And he, but it's not that he loves the planning about it. Like he lives for that. - Yeah. - Like I tried to be like, why is Jess and yourself out and he goes, this is what gives me joy. - Yeah. - So we started talking to this girl and she leaves and she has an accent. And we're both like, should we ask her where she's from? We start guessing. This is how, look, this is marriage. - Yeah. - We're sick of each other. We've got to make stuff happen. - Bring in a third. - So I was like, where are you from? And she's like, Italy. - No way. - 'Cause she said, what is the thing that's telling us to say on TikTok? - Italian brain rot. - Thank you. - Okay. - Okay, yeah, yeah. - Yeah. - Okay, yeah. - So you're Italian. And then I was like, I'm Italian. And she's like, wait, I'm like one. No, from Italy, but anyway. - Yeah. - So we're doing a thing. And then I'm like getting a little too comfortable with her. She like, she gives up the stuff and she's like, okay, thank you. And I look at her and go, "Ciao Bella!" - This looked to me. I was like, we need to, we need to go home. - No. - We have to leave the restaurant right now. - 'Cause I was like, what did she, did she look back at you? She actually probably found that endearing and sweet. - She never responded. - Cool. - She just turned around and I was like, who's that creepy? - How old was she? - She was like 50. - Oh. - I don't know. - Totally fine. Totally fine. - Where's the TikTok, "Ciao Bella?" Where did I come from? - No, that's their culture. I could've just said, "Ciao," but I, - Yeah. - Saying "Ciao Bella," and that's something that comes of age. - Yeah. - 'Cause in your 20s, you're not saying "Ciao Bella" to a 50-year-old woman. - Yeah. - But now I'm like, me and you, honey. - It's funny because sometimes when I'm texting, like, work stuff and I want people, and sometimes my tone I think can come off, in text can come off like more serious than I'm actually trying to be. Like, I'll reread it and I'll be like, "Ooh, that's scary." - Scary. - So then on the end, I'll just say, "Grassias." - And so then, and then everything's like, well, that's fine. - Oh, she's just, like, she's being whimsical. She was like, "That's why I do the millennial L.O.L. sandwich." She started L.O.L. Say something really fucking dark and serious in the end with L.O.L. and you're like, that is those fucking periods. I had to pull them aside. I was like, you're scaring people. - He does full punctuation. - Full periods. - Yeah. - You're not a period at the end. Does "Hit" talk to text yet? - No. - Good. - Good. - No. - 'Cause I feel like once you hit that, - How could you do this to me part down? - Yeah, like it's not. - Oh, I do have to do a shout out. I posted a beautiful photo of "Butter" in my apartment and I thought all the comments were going to be like, "Butter's so cute." And there was some. However, most of them were like, "Why is your apartment so clean?" I've never seen a part of it so clean. Now, I just hope that you guys know. It's 'cause I moved into it that day. (laughing) - We're in Miami. - Yes. - Because "Serious" has an amazing studio in Miami. - So we're gonna record in it, like sometimes. - But we're trying to live in the same apartment building and it's like really hard. - It's really hard because some of them don't have pets and now all this. And I, whenever I see, like, doesn't allow pets, in my head, I'm like, "Kitty's not a pet." - But then I'm like, "The dog." - "The dog." - So I look in a moment like, "You're ruining my life." - Yes. - Because you can't conceal a dog. - I was gonna say. - With Kat, we lie. - Yeah, I'm like, "You'll never see her." - But her will never come out. - Proof that I have the cat, maybe I like the litter box. (laughing) - I don't know. - Sorry, my husband uses the litter box. (laughing) (bell chiming) - Speaking of hores. - Yeah. - After the shingles hormonologue. - Yeah. - I was watching "Ease of Eden" and I was like, "These hores dress tactually." (laughing) - I don't know how you go from your local brothel to like, can go out in a short skirt. - These hores, corset, layers, these hores dress gorgeous. - Hang on. (laughing) - One whore fine. Three whores on a Sunday. - This Sunday, I forgot it's a Sunday. - It's the Lord's day. - Sorry. - No, but like, being a prostitute was like, it was a job. - Also, those women were entrepreneurial. - Well, they are the only women in that time period that were actually free. - And they were the only women that had freedom. - And the madam who owned it. - So no wonder men were so like, that's disgusting, that's bad, because they were the only women that could like, come and go as they please. - It's giving every guy who hates only friend models, but has seven only friend subscriptions. Why do the ones who hate them always are the ones who have the most subscriptions? - Yeah. - If they were thinking of the same person. (laughing) Also, it's so funny how in East of Eden, she comes to like, interview to be a prostitute. And the ladies like, you're so pretty, you could have a husband. She was like, I would rather do anything but have a husband. - Yeah. - I wanna work fully and make my own money here. If I'm gonna sleep with a man I don't like, I'd rather make money for it. - Totally. - And that's the tea. - Yeah. No, it's a great shout. Do you like, have you finished it? - I'm like slowly getting through it. - I wonder why, but I really like it. I think it should win stuff. - It should absolutely win stuff. - She's like, this is like the British, I've ever like, like I love her in this girl. - Yeah, she's in here. - Yeah, everything. She's just like really, it's so good at the role. - Yeah. - But I wonder what happened that you could walk into a brothel, pay, have sex with a girl, leave. And now you can't. Why can't you? - I think it happens. - But leave? - But leave? - Is that leaving? - Yeah, but they get in trouble, don't they? - In Vegas, I think you can. - Only fans is phenomenal for women. - Genius. - Because then they're not, but they don't have to go to some random studio, film something like they could just do it in their own home. - There's the show going around about like, suburban moms, who have full families, who are all and only fans. Thank you. channel. I actually work is like cooler or TLC. I mean, it's really good, but they're all friends, like no one's judging each other. They're like, yeah, we're making really good money. I bet they're making insane money. Here's the thing that has never, I've never understood about like only fans or strippers or whatever. Like people are so mean about their profession, especially men. It's like, no, it's man. You guys are paying them. It's like it's you. There's one more. Yeah. So one woman get bad, another woman for making money. First, I'm like, good, take their fucking money. It's the men who like hate that they're getting tricked. And also the men who don't who are not only fans, we're talking bad about only fans. They don't care. They're like, do whatever you want. Right. But it's the men who like want them so bad. And it makes them mad. So they want to be like, and you're you ever meet a guy who's, I have met guys like this. Like I almost feel like Pete Davinson was actually talking about only fans, but he said TikTok to be PC. Well, when he said get ready with me, that like, oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. But there's no like, there's no influence or making 40 million dollars a year on influencing. Like that was, but I feel like there are only fans girls making 40 million. Yeah. My favorite is when you meet a guy and you're like, what's your type? And he's like, not only fans model. And I'm like, I'm not saying, what's not your type? And he's like, she just can't do only fans. And he's like, you are the only one that's brought up only fans. Yeah. I'm like, say anything besides the only fans. And he's like, she can't sell flipics. I got, wait, you got requests. Yeah, because you have five stars and wiki feet. It's like talked about the beauty of me and asked if they could pay for my manicures and pedicures. And honestly, I thought, no, I can't do that. But for a second, I was like, be like, put it towards end of materials this please. Truly. I'm also doing this thing called tab rehab tab rehab. It's for all my open tabs. It's becoming a problem. Like, I have so many tabs that I have to start a new whole new window. And I don't get rid of the previous window. And then I get a ton of tabs. I start new window. And then I had so many. And then I was like, I'm gonna nuke this shit. And I just exed out of all of them. Can you do one big X in the corner, like the whole internet page? Well, I have multiple pages. You have multiple internet pages up with multiple tabs. Like how many internet pages? Like, I was at like six. I feel like an 80 five year old grandma. One internet page. You have how many? I had like six full of like, full of like, over a hundred tabs each. So I exed out all of them and I feel great. And I don't even know what the tabs were. But that's how I feel about my screenshots too. Like one day, I needed like sit and look through all my important screenshots that I screened. That's done. That's over. We've no. We could never go through our photos on our phones anymore. Once you've hit the age of 30, that's an abyss. Who could go through that? I want an app that could literally just go through my screenshots and tell me like, they have it. And it deletes duplicates. No, but like, that's like, these are clearly nails you like. This was through the arrest of organizing. Yes, and then like, it's just there because right now it's, it's right chaotic. Also, apparently, Splendid's really bad for you. And the gig is mad at me. It also tastes disgusting. And she's ugly. I've been texting your boyfriend about what? Don't like, like, you don't know your honest phone. I actually, when I text him, I imagine I'm texting you too. I'm like, hi, page. No, but we are deep in fancy football. And it's funny because you guys have a big day today. We have a big day today and he like knows things because he like works in sports. So many facts. So I'm like, getting someone could say a Super Bowl from like 2006 and he'd be like, well, the one play that I'm like, no, I literally, and I also, I'm like, he's busy. Like, and I'm, this is, I'm in a hundred dollar game with fancy football. And I was just like, hey, and I sent him my whole lineup. And he sent me like, this crazy reasoning of like, why this guy should be played over this guy, but like, people wouldn't know, but it's because of this and I was just like, really impressed, but I'm like, you wouldn't understand. No, because it's not important. It's not going to bring value to anyone's life. No, he's really benefiting me and my league where I have to beat Andrew Colin. And I'm all for it. And sometimes I'll be like, do you want to watch with me? And do you want to hang out? And I always say, I'm doing, I texted him because we're in different rooms of the house. It does doesn't support my fan's football either. I'm like, I'm doing my stuff. I've stuff to do. Sometimes it's a screen with a game and then a computer with two games. And then downstairs, there's another screen going with four games. So if I hear the phrase red zone, one more time, I'm excited when you said that, unless we're talking about what nail color I'm doing, would you know I do red twice a year? I don't care. Also, the men are bleeding money because they're all spending all their money bedding. And then you have to pay like $80 a month for like NFL drop kick. Well, now they can bet like, okay, this player is going to wear this color shoe like that. They're betting their houses away. And then yet, then I'm suddenly accidentally signed up for like a YouTube TV. And then like, I don't even, it's impossible to watch the games. It was doing that Super Bowl. It was going to be Miley Cyrus. And now there's like, that was just a whisper chatter that there's it's chatter. Um, very good question. But it's in L.A. I feel like it shouldn't be her. It should be someone L.A. Super Bowl in L.A. Yeah. It's not. I feel like it changes. Did I just make that up? I think you did. No, I think it's in L.A. The Olympics is in L.A. I think that it's also that I think they're have they're having a big year who was going to say a football. Oh, I watch it. Like they're my sons because if one of them gets injured, well, because they are kids. They're they're literally 19 years old. And they're learning. They're growing and they do one thing and then it's like done for the season. If one of them gets injured, it fucks me up. So I literally like a guy gets caught. And I'm like, don't touch him. Don't touch him. And then he scores and I'm like, that's my baby. That's my baby. I wish I could be passionate about anything like that. But then when like it doesn't go my way, I get a sick little feeling on my stomach. And the little voices come in my head and they're like, you stupid idiot. Why would you pick him? You knew the other guy would have done better. You're stupid. You're stupid. And then I have to turn it off and does is like, Hey, and I'm like, not now. I wish they have like a fantasy football for like what I thought the lineup at Victoria's Secret Fashion show is going to be. So I could bet on it. Like, who do I think's opening the show? I actually made this sketch a long time ago, making fun of how when we used to watch the Bachelor on Mondays, it was exactly like guys watching football on Mondays because they'd be like, why are you obsessed with this one guy? And we're like, sorry, he's the guy. Yeah, he's the quarterback. And it's like, is it every week? And it's like, yeah, either be a part of the season or don't. Like, let's go. So we're more similar than different is the moral of the story. Anyway, anything else going on? No, I think that was really all I had. As of now, I'm still going on my trip. Okay. But you know, there's a long week ahead of us, you know, you're in having on the 22nd. And we decided that when I'm in Asia, we're going to record because it's so be like 10 a.m. your time, 10 p.m. I time, which is like fine. The chemistry is going to be on one morning, one night. Who knows? Or, yeah, I'm scared. Thank you guys for giggling with us. We love you so much. Talk to you later. Bye.