Giggling about meatballs, minions, and masseter disasters

(upbeat music) - Sup, Giggler? - Harriet, fix your Wi-Fi. - Manifest that shit. We can't be manners. (laughing) - I mean, the day just got away from me? - Hello, my gosh, Drow and Testino Gigglers. Pay to who are you? - I'm peeing from my asshole. That's-- (laughing) - That's how I feel. - I'm the most annoying person to go on vacation with. Like, I truly must be a menace. - You were complaining about not eating enough at dinner. Now you ate and are dealing with the repercussions. But what happened? - So Matt's dinner last night, we're getting advertisers. I see meatballs on the menu. - You sent me a photo of them. - I go, "Look how gorgeous these balls are." - And I wrote adorable. I love a little ball. - I take a bite. And I'm like, "Oh my God, this is so good." My brother gets the same thing. I look over at my mom. I'm like, "You have to have one of these meatballs." I'm a whole meatball in, okay? I cut another one and a half. I give it to put it on my mom's plate. It's red sauce on the meatballs. So I'm thinking nothing. My mom looks at it and she goes, "I don't think this is cooked." And my whole face goes white. I'm like, "What do you mean it's not cooked?" And my brother looks at me and he was like, "It's not that big of a deal." Like beef corpachio. Like you're literally like you're freaking out over nothing. And I'm like, "I'll see you in Italy. Everything is good." - I'm like, "I'm freaking out over nothing." I get back to my room. I fall asleep at like 5 a.m. I'm woken up by the own sounds of my stomach. I said, "What a little melody." We're playing. - I mean, the gurgling was. I literally woke up. I got somethings going on in the room next door. What the fuck is that sound? - Yo, there's a tornado. - I run to the bathroom. I'm truly peeing from my asshole. I get up, I'm dizzy. I'm light-headed. Like I'm like, "Oh my god, I'm gonna throw up." I could throw up just talking. I get back in bed. I fall asleep for a couple hours. I'm like, "I'm fine." I just like, my body's so sensitive. Like I'm literally, "I'm fine." I go to the pool all day. I think the heat, and then I had prosciutto and cheese, and I thought, "No, I'm fine. I can eat this. I had a little bread." I literally had to leave the pool run to my bathroom. Pea from my asshole again. Now I'm cold. Now I'm getting the shakes. Now I have a fever. My head is pounding. I'm like, "Here, and here's the thing. It is a privilege to travel. I am so privileged to get sick on prosciutto." - I am so blessed in this life that I live. But when people say I love traveling, I don't relate to them because my body is so sensitive. I can't get thrown off, or it's like-- - Well, also, yeah, you don't have your vibrating plate. I don't mind stuff. Where's my stuff? There's a lot of things that go into you existing, and you don't just go into a hotel room and have everything you need, even if it's five stars. - I'm checking three furbo cameras every 10 minutes. I'm like, I'm such a pain in the ass. - Can you put a little hex on you? She said, yeah, go have fun. Go have fun, leave me at home. - Every year, there's a pool rule at our hotel that once it hits 2 p.m, kids have to get out of the pool. - I thought you were going to say pool rule, no diary. (laughs) I love when they write that, like, summer with diary. It would be like, you know, it would be good being in the pool right now. - Well, I'm sitting in the pool and I'm like, I have to go to my room and fart because I'm not having a Hannah burner in coppery. - Okay, I'm not Hannah burnering all over. - It's a verb now, we're about to Hannah burner this pool. (laughs) - I'm like, I'm not sharding. In a Gucci bathing suit, I rather kill myself. - Vintage, you can't just buy it if you lose it. Also farting in a pool is so freeing when it's not a shard. 'Cause that's just-- - Hannah. - This pool, like, it's a big circle pool and there's, like, random buttons that you can press and, like, Juts will come on. And the first thing I think of was, Hannah would freaking love this. And every time I have to pee, I turn the kettle. - Wait, so where's your stomach in this moment? Where are we at? - She's just, like, gurgling a little. She's, like, I think she's, like, getting better, but now it's just, like, my head, I'm dehydrated. I'm just, like, here's another thing I realized, I'm so goddamn sick of myself. Everything's about me all the time. And I think it's because I'm on vacation with my parents, where, like, they're so obsessed with me, I'm, like, enough with this bitch. - Yeah. - I, yeah. - Yeah, you're, like, can we get one other topic to talk about at dinner? - And this year, for whatever reason, there's so many babies at the pool, like, baby babies, like, not speaking, like, not even a year old. And I've had, like, so-- - You can't even have a good conversation. (laughing) - Can't even, not even a hello, how are you? - Can't even put the sentence together. But I've been having such, like, baby fever. I don't know why. And I think it's because I'm sick of my own shit. - Figuratively and literally. - I do have to say, the only time I've been wanting to have a baby is when I'm like, I wanna deal with someone else's issues. - Yeah. - I'm ready to pour myself into someone else and let myself fade away. - I do think that's something that kind of happens in your 30s, like, you're like, oh, it's me again. Morning, me again. (laughing) - Wait, what is that? - I feel like no one's cold being tired, like, and I think that's why people like to have babies and people don't talk about it. You're 20s, you're like, I'm so excited to, like, explore who I am and your 30s, you're like, yep, no, why am I? - I'm good. - And honestly, I don't fuck with our show. Let's, like, (laughing) - Right, like, everyone talks about, like, oh, your biological clock starts ticking. You get so maternal. I'm not feeling that. I'm feeling like-- - No, it's more-- - Let's talk about some of our character into the storyline, 'cause I've ran out of storylines over here. (laughing) I'm sick of 'em. Also, side note, the gigglers wrote in our YouTube, they really can't us. This is a safe space, let your smile fly, so I'm not gonna cover my smile when I laugh. This episode. - That is so sweet. - Not because I'm gonna start to feel safe, but because I'm at the point with a smile fiasco, or as people call it, the master disaster. (laughing) - Oh my God, that's so cute. It's a cute, it's that old. - Wait, that's adorable. - I need to say shout out to my husband who I love soft launching on Instagram. Do you notice, like-- - You've been made for five years. - I don't put him in any photo. It's just, like, you'll see his hands and everyone's, like, kind of soft launching. (laughing) So, he's my soft launch baby, but he's distracted me, but he's, again, doing his tough love thing, where now I have someone with me, so every, like, every, like, 20 minutes, I'm, like, do you think it looks better? And he's, like, I swear to God, if you ask me one more fucking time. He goes, "Your smile is, like, a stock. You investing it, don't check for a year." And I was, like, what? Kind of analogies that, but he's, like, kind of lowkey, right? He's, like, if you keep checking every day, it's gonna be torturous. He's, like, come back to me in a month and check it. - Do you feel, like, it has, like, from when you first got it, do you feel, like, any little, like, a more range of motion? - No, but I do feel, like, emotionally, I've come to terms with it a little more, where I'm not, like, waking up and being, like, "Oh, my God, I can't smile." I'm like, "This is she, this is what I live." - The shock has worn off. - The shock has worn off. Also last week, my sweet, sweet, oh my God, I was so determined and hopeful. I was, like, running, I was going to sauna, I was getting acupuncture, I was doing massages, I was doing microcurrents. - Did you do acupuncture in your face? - Yeah, I did it in my face. - Oh, how was that? I've never done that. I've never done it in my face. - It's interesting because you do feel, like, kind of a rush of the blood. Like, I feel like it's doing something. - Totally. - I don't think it helped. - I do feel, like, acupuncture is one of those things that, like, it doesn't work unless you did it every day all day. Like, so many girls I feel like have recommended it and I've done it before for, like, certain pain. And I'm like, yeah, I can feel something, but unless I'm doing this three times a week, like, and this is a lot hot. - Yeah, they recommend twice a week, but also, no, I just had so much hope for myself and I was like, I'm gonna beat this. I can beat this. - You're like, I'm not a statistic. - I know I literally was like, I'm gonna be the one girl that, like, tricked her nerves to not do this 'cause I'm working so hard at it and I care. And then I woke up this morning and I said, "Bitch, you can't beat Botox. This is your nerve ending." - No, it's a chemical. It's a poison. - You're done. You're done. - It is kind of crazy, though, and because that had happened to both of us in such a short amount of time and now the gigglers are sending me so many DMs of, like, different stories, like on Instagram and TikTok of, like, it's poison it's like did you see my mom commented under our video saying don't do drugs like my mom is horrified my mom's never touched her face her mom's never touched her face her mom's never touched her face and she's like yeah bitch you put crazy stuff in your face of course something stupid is gonna happen to you I do implore the filler girls to just do a little research take a look because god forbid you do something with filler and then that's it oh yeah filler your fault that's what you look like that's and it's I just like have my mom in the back of my head like if god wanted you to look like that he would have made you like that well yes I'm searching the island for rosary beads she said I just wanted nice you would think that they have rosary beads here and they don't she can't find them she's literally it's it's ruining her trap I guess because the rosary no one needs it on vacation everyone's relaxed you don't need it rosary on vacation I don't know but Italy is so funny because any if you look anywhere randomly there's just like a statue of the blessed mother and you're just like okay sorry oh it's like me in Canada I'm seeing like different celebrities on ads that are like really famous here I'm like oh I didn't know they were big in Canada that's the lesson Mary and Italy I'm like she's huge every time we go to like the pool or anywhere my dad will say hey look at that guy he's on TV I think and I like look over and I'm like no he's that's just a handsome Italian man and like he's not on TV that's just a tan full head of hair Italian man he's like are he sure let me get a good another look oh yeah maybe you're right like he's literally thanks everyone we've seen as a celebrity also can we address the scar Pfizer that broke the internet I knew that my scar Pfizer was going to be split down the middle and here's the thing about being in Italy and posting content I feel like I post more tiktok videos in Italy because I'm happier also you did say you were going on a phone strike and I kind of have because I feel when I post here it's such a time change that I am so disconnected from like the comments or like so because I'm on like a different schedule so right when I post it no one's commenting it because no one's awake so I do feel very disconnected from the world wait I feel so disconnected from the world here that I haven't even done my skincare routines night or morning oh because skincare doesn't count in Italy I don't know I just haven't noticed I'm like I don't care not doing it I feel free it's because you're relaxed I think that's what it is haven't done my hair I barely put on makeup but I've done like mascara and blush well page I don't want to diagnose you but your skincare is also a coping mechanism of your anxiety somehow like it's like when you're anxious you're like if I could just fix this pimple everything will be better it's like my mom with cleaning well sometimes that pimple is the problem okay so I feel like you're putting all your problems into the pimple but we'll discuss my life is going great unless I get a cystic pimple well cystic that is truly volcano with this entire face so I do have empathy for you um scarf visor this is also my algorithm shows me if I if you post when I go and take that your video comes up first so I get you early I don't see comments I leave my stamp of approval and then I move on so I don't actually know the response of the visor I just know that I was I felt it in my core that it was a moment I saw it online like a couple weeks ago and I was just like if that shouldn't cost $200 but put it in my cart because I'm intrigued I'm like this is just a piece of sheer but like I just thought the model looks so cool and I love an accessory I love a bathing suit cover up also you love a frill you love a frill I love it I just love this something different let me just try it you know and but I didn't realize that the model legitimately looked like you like everyone was like this picture that you posted of the model is Hannah I don't know I think people are like you know when someone dies and people are like putting them on a pedestal that's how people are treating my old smile they're like how it was so beautiful and she was she just lit up a room like they're like talking and they're like putting rose colored glasses on who I was they were like she was just euphoric but um they're rewriting history they are they're literally any man on bravo let's just re-write it let's just change the past I don't know 10 years sorry that was out of pocket and I don't care because I'm thousands of miles away don't think how you're in Italy what absolutely stays in Italy so my thing also with the visor it kind of made you look like you had bangs like in a good way like I don't think I actually had it on correctly I think I should have flipped it over but I'm gonna wear it again for sure I actually think I might wear it next this weekend because I don't think it fully got it's moment I didn't get a pick up it did some Gucci which is kind of like I don't know I'm just like proud of you wait Hannah I didn't even tell you I went to my vintage store here and I got the sickest vintage like 90s Valentino turtleneck dress not really it's like a shirt that I'm gonna make a dress and it has these like big cutouts and it's it's so cool you'll be so proud of me I'm so excited because I feel like you're getting better and better at thrifting it's like everyone has their own eye and skill and you're like really getting into it you're in the weeds yeah well you've really inspired me because I just think it's more consignment I think like consignment is so cuz you're like what was her story what was her story that she had this like sick designer whatever and then she's like I don't eat it anymore you know and I'm like would it you know I love it it's like she word enough yeah or she's dead oh you know I didn't think about she lives through it there are a lot of you know a state sales where like a really cool woman passes away and like she didn't have any daughters yeah that's okay that was that was her lesson support for today's episode comes from square the system powering like half the places I go we've built Gagley Squad into a full business at this point between podcast merch touring and everything and there's a lot of moving parts and if there's one thing we've learned it's that you can be chaotic but your business cannot be square helps business owners focus on the fun parts creating things building something showing up not chasing down where payment went or trying to figure out if something is in stock have you ever walked into a place and you're like oh this business has their life together like you tap 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it's interesting what celebrities got packed and which didn't because there were a thousand people there so it's funny that like you grant was the one that like we kept getting photos of and then like gg had deed like i wonder if they were she was like okay let these couple celebrities post and then no one else um i did get like tea like a month or two ago that it was in msg no one believed me and my only real thought was i love how they posted on the screen like some someone just was like get canva let's just pick a font and i thought it was an AT&T ad which if it was genius if it wasn't kind of annoyed because AT&T She didn't deserve that kind of promo, but like seeing TNT. - Yeah. - If it was a T plus T, I feel like that might have been better. - You know, you're so right. - It was really giving AT&T, and I was like, holy shit AT&T, AT&T or with the main sponsors of You and Iconic. - At first, I thought like, oh, she's doing it at Madison Square Garden because like security and like privacy and blah, blah, blah. And then I quickly realized like that. She didn't really give a shit about that. Like, I think she liked doing it on 4th of July weekend, like a holiday weekend. I think that like goes with whatever album. - Someone said if they break up, she's gonna write Independence Day as like the divorce song. - I also think that weddings have changed so much since COVID, and I truly believe - In allotments. - No, I truly believe you should have whatever kind of wedding you want. - Yes. - I mean, you should do whatever you want always, but specifically your wedding, I think you should truly do whatever the fuck you want. Like, alope, have a party, don't have a party, go to the courthouse, invite a thousand people, invite two people. Like, I don't care, it has no bearing on my life. - Go to a pizza parlor. - The only thing I have to say about Taylor's source wedding is the thought of four avenues being shut down in the middle of New York City on a holiday weekend. What are you talking? If you've ever been in New York City, we're just a side street to shut down. The whole city is where we go, we don't know where to go. You're telling me they shut down 7th Avenue, 6th Avenue, 5th Avenue, like, you're telling me five streets were shut down on a holiday weekend. My first thought is, what if there was an emergency and an ambulance couldn't get through? Like, this is why I hate parades, specifically just for this reason, 'cause if you see a parade in New York City and a street is shut down, you're fucked. Like, it will now take you 45 extra minutes to get to your destination. - But I think she was talking on July 4th, a lot of people being out in the Hamptons, but I don't think everyone in New York City is going to the Hamptons, it's not like-- - Yeah, Hamptons is for elite assholes. - In what world are the majority of New York City out in the Hamptons, they're not. That's like a facade on an instrument. - Yeah. - The majority of people that live in New York City are there for the holiday weekend. So I, that was my only thing. I was like, I'm shocked that this is, that the city is even kind of letting this happen because I felt like it was kind of dangerous. You can't shut down five avenues. - I have a lot of mixed emotions. - I feel like it's kind of annoying that she had to donate 30 million dollars to charities to try to avoid some hate on her wedding weekend. - Well, I did hear it was 50 million dollars. - 50 million. I feel like a man getting married, like a famous man doing something crazy, like he would never have to do that. But she literally was like, can you guys please let me just have a weekend? I'm putting 50 million dollars to charity. Like, please don't hit me. - And like, look, I'm not mad at her for wanting attention. I love attention. I've been up with on reality TV for seven years. I think attention is amazing. But like, she wanted the attention for her wedding weekend. And that's totally, I don't, I'm not mad at that. Like, but I think people being like, oh, so she didn't care about privacy. Well, obviously not. That didn't, she didn't care. Yeah, she wanted people to know she was getting married. Which yeah, let the people know. - I do think also logistically, her team is so good at building sets. So like a parent, like, it was literally the same people from the Aristotle, I think, that like came in, built this fucking set in a quick amount of time. It's like what they know. And it is just so funny when you have more money than you can imagine. It's almost like you have too many options of what to do. But I feel like her and her and Travis love socializing. They love partying. They love people. - I think he loves being famous. And I think she loves showing him, like, and look how famous you are now. I think that, like. - I was gonna say, and I don't, I love his love, but I mean, you would understand more than anyone, how sometimes with fame, you can fall in love with the spotlight on you rather than the person. - Okay, in my fragile state of shitting from my asshole. But you can fall in love with the idea of people, the idea of your relationship through the public eye versus your relationship. And that's why I think so many extremely famous people don't survive their relationships because you can't actually see, like, true intimacy when you have so many lenses on you. I don't know, that was a lot, that was really worthy. - I think that's why a lot of people got divorced or married during COVID because you were so forced to be with that person. And it was just you too. You couldn't socialize with anyone else. And I think that is really important. Like a perfect example is Zendaya and Tom Holland. Like, we still don't even know when or where. - Are they together? - Do they even live in the same house? We don't know. And I just think that I also, because I have been in like a public relationship before, I do think when you are in something, and you can relate to this. - But this one's a compliment. (laughing) - When you truly, and it doesn't even matter, it doesn't even mean the relationship. It could be the relationship with your mom, your dad, your brother. - People hurt people. That's what we're learning today. Her people hurt people. - When you truly love something so much and you care about it, you want to protect it from even like, the person on the street. Like you, you're like, you can say whatever you want about me, but if you say one fucking thing about my mom. Like, so I think if you really like cherish, there are certain things that you're like, I would never want anyone to know this. Like, I would never want someone privy to this, 'cause this is just for us. And so I do think that there could be a lot of criticism of tailor and traps is wedding, but also like, if it works for them, nozzle top. - After dealing with reality TV where I put someone I love in a position, that's why I've had to scale back, because I feel like I made a mistake and I shouldn't have done that to him. - It's funny, I had someone ask me the other day if I would, like, when I get married and have kids, like, would I do a reality show? And I, it was like a random person. And I was like, oh my God, that's such an interesting question. I've never really thought about that before, but my gut feeling was the thought of someone criticizing my child. Like, no. - Well, the whole thing with reality TV is I always say, people are like, why'd you do it? And I'm like, I was 26 and single. And I did it until my family started to get hate messages. - Dude, I did it as revenge. I didn't even think it was real. I literally, my boyfriend pissed me off and I was like, watch this, I'm going on a show. And then I walked in and I was like, wait. I forgot, I was actually doing this. Oh, God, I don't. - Are women in STEM of the week? - Oh. - I'm on a really weird algorithm. It's iconic. It's, there are these minion contests. Have you seen these minion singing contests? - I have in Hannah. - So with these just like normal hot girls, I go up to a mic and then sing songs in the minion voice and language. I've never seen the minion movie, but I guess they have their own language like L-fish tape tape. - Okay, I've never seen it. - So these like gorgeous girls are like singing like, in a minion voice. - And it's getting like really competitive and like the winners are kind of blowing up. So shout out to all the girls who are really good at being minions. - Sweet, I don't get it. - Aint hot, my name's a man. - Where are they doing it? - In a theater somewhere. (laughing) Maybe it's Canadian, I don't know. - So confused. - You want to know what? That's actually what pissed me off this week. (laughing) Because what are you talking about? - Just a bunch of grown people burgeoning to be minions and if they don't know, thank you. I don't want you. - But you know what, nothing makes me happier than a hot girl doing something weird. - Totally. - Something I respect her. Something I'm like, oh, you've been through some dark shit if you found yourself at this point. - I'm caught up on Love Island USA and I'm done watching it. I actually don't care who wins. The season was one of the weirdest seasons of Love Island. I've ever watched my entire life. There's three men on the show that are so annoying. Two of them? Okay, they kind of omned up to their shit, whatever. The one guy? I mean, he's a pathological liar. It's not even like, sorry, I shouldn't have done that. He's blatantly a pathological liar. He can't stop lying. He's literally getting no hate and the girl who had been dumped and fucked over and was exploring other men is getting more hate. And if I hear someone call them lustful, one more time, I'm gonna scream. Like, what in the Old Testament? Are you fucking saying? Stop using the word lustful. You sound like freaks. You sound like actual weirdos. - Sounds like Adam and Eve. - Yeah, like, okay. You sound so manosphere. It's actually really terrifying. And like, girls can kiss multiple men. and not be a whore, you absolute weirdos. Like, and all the girls want this one girl Melanie to go back with this guy who's lied since the day he's gotten in there, and then looked at the other girl who was being lustful, and was like, it's really bad for you. I don't know what's going on with love that, but I actually don't care who lends. - Do you care about UK? - So now I'm getting back into UK, and I'm starting to care more about them, because well, here's the other thing. UK is like double the time, and they get to know each other more, and there's more conversation, and they, I'm sorry, they have more banter. We as Americans, we sound dumb, we sound stupid. Now, I'm not saying the UK love island cast is a bunch of goddamn geniuses, but they just feel-- - They used much more. - Sure. - Yeah, they just feel like they're more, honestly, the love island USA cast feels like you're in a TikTok. I feel like I'm in the app of TikTok, where like UK, it feels like real young kids, like trying to meet each other and like fuck around. - Well, my husband has been getting-- (laughing) - Oh yeah, he texted me about it. - Love Island. - Yeah, love Island UK clips, but now he's like fully immersed in it, and it's like the, I'm not watching it, so I'm like text page, she's watching it, but we watched it when they were like fact of 50, so I keep going up to him and be like, are they saying like fact of 50? And he's like, no, that's so five years ago. No, it says that anymore. And I was like, oh shit. - There have been dumb people on love Island. Like one girl didn't know the difference between a continent, a country, a county, like she was-- - No, you do not have to be smart. - No, absolutely not. - To get on love Island. You have to be some version of hot. - And look, a lot of people will say, it's not that serious, it's not that big of a deal. It kind of is because they just pulled a group of the same age people, and this is their dating habits. The men lie, and the girls think each other are horrors, and should put up with way more than they should put up with. - I can't, you guys, I want to be part of this dialogue, and I want to be making fun of it and stuff, but like-- - You're too cute for it. - I'm just like not lustful. I'm like, what in the serpent queen are you fucking talking about? Like lustful? I've never said that word in my 33 years on this planet. They're like lust is like the worst thing you can be in a relationship. It's like, actually maybe a ding bat is the worst thing you can be. Like, shut up. - Bring back a ding bat. A little update, speaking of shows, I'm shooting my show right now. - Yeah, it's a guy. - It's going really, I'm like really excited for this show. I can't give details, however, I am being a menace to the glam team. Well, the makeup artist, she's fully trying to joke her me, and make it look like I'm lifted, and not looking sad in everything. And then, so this one guy's the hair guy, Rye. He's like, let's do a ponytail. Which I said, you know what, let's do it. But when they do a slick back ponytail, they put so many bobby pins. Now, you more than anyone would understand. You know what a bobby pin just hits wrong, and you're like, that's in my brain. - Yeah. - And when you're shooting a show, first 30 minutes, I was fine. And now we're in, I was like, "What's going on back there?" I was just waiting in between takes, and I'm like, fuck it. I'm trying to move this bobby pin. I pull out a bobby pin, 'cause I'm like, "Yolo, whole ponytail comes undone." It was like the important bobby pin. - It was like the bobby pin. - It was the main character bobby pin. - It was Mr. bobby pin. - And as Mr. pin to you. - Yeah. - So I go, oh, fuck, 'cause I thought I could take it out and no one would know. - Right, 'cause sometimes you can. You're like, "Oh, this one is like. " - This was not even needed, and it was just, like, I literally still feel it. So the guy comes out, right? It's like rolling his eyes. He's like, "Oh my God, has to redo my whole pony. Stop production." My whole face falls, everyone's like, "Okay." So I know, it's like reality TV again, 'cause I have my mic on me, and they'll like put me in a room and be like, "Okay, like in 10 minutes, "we'll have you come out of the room to like. " - It's a hot mic situation. - I'm fully farted. (laughing) - Wait, when are you done? - I think next week, but like, I'm so excited for the Gaggers to watch the show. Like, we're killing it with the looks and I'm wearing glasses every day to like make me a different person. - To offset, yeah. - Okay, I think that's, I love, the picture you posted on your story the other day, I love when you wear your hair pulled back like that. - Yeah, I knew you'd be into it. Oh, also I have to issue an apology, so I'm just going through some notes. - Okay. - I did this thing of like things that I hate. And I said, man named Braden. And then I got only like three messages, but it was enough backlash from the Gaggers. I feel like I should address it of Gaggers being like, "How do I love you so much?" But like my sweet, sweet son's name is Braden and this like really hurt, really hurt my feelings. So I just wanna say, when I say I don't like guys named Braden, I don't mean the gigglers, sons named Braden. - We don't mean anyone under 30, 25, sorry. - I wanna say sorry to all the giggler Bradens. You guys are perfect 'cause they're being raised by us, but anyone already millennial Bradens, they have no shot. - Sometimes I use this podcast as like my personal forum. - Sometimes. - I really need an orthopedic search. (laughing) To get M.A.D. - We're so old Bradens. - Because, Hannah, do you know what a ganglion cyst is? - I feel like my dad had that one. - Okay, look at my wrist. - Wait, that's what like, oh. - Like old women have. My grandma used to have one. I have the, look at that. - Oh. - Oh. - Look at that. - Dude, it hurts. So bad, that's why like I used to have to wear my wrist thing all the time because I think it was that. - You would get a ganglion cyst on your hand. That's 'cause your hand is too long. - I was like, mom, what do I do about it? And she was like, oh, your grandma used to have that. They go away on their own or you can get it surgically removed. And they're like, but I don't wanna get it surgically removed. But I need it gone 'cause it's actually really starting to hurt me. And then I have like an indent right here. - Yeah, well the good news is you're not walking around like this. - My dad said, oh, just to go like this. Yeah. - Just don't walk around like our little rabbit. - This is why I have to have a baby. I'm so sick of my own shit. Who gets that? - Yeah, well, if it makes you feel better, I got a mole on my back. Like I don't have a mole. I've never had a mole in my life. But it's a mole on my back. And Des was like, you should get that check this cancer. And I'm like, no, my grandpa got these. Like this is just who I am now. So, but I'll get it checked. - I think he should get that check. - No, no, no, no, no. Also I know we're getting older. I know I'm getting older because I love this my favorite thing to say now. I love going, oh, the humidity broke. What? I feel like that's such an adult thing to say. Like, you know, after it rains, I go, yep, the humidity broke. - That's not even an adult thing. That's like a very niche type of dad who's over 55. A way above 55. - No, Des loves the weather. My mom loves the weather. It's someone that like worked with their hands, you know? Like they did something. - Saying the humidity broke is my new like, it's really nice outside. - Yeah. - I think the humidity definitely broke. And then I heard myself say, I'm like, who are you? Like they are not saying that on the violin for sure. - The humidity broke? - Yeah. - No, but it definitely is really fucking hot there. And I don't know how they're like their makeup is staying because they never look like they're sweaty and their hair always looks put together. And I don't, I don't know how they're doing it. I'd also like to know what time they're going to bed and what time they're waking up, but that's my own. - Yeah. - Are they allowed to drink on the violin? - To drink minimum. And the brits ruin that for them. I'm pretty sure. - But also to drink, it doesn't say how many shots that is. Like you could do just like two huge vodka cups. - No, I don't, I don't think they give them hard liquor. I want to say it's wine or beer. OG UK, they would like chain smoke sakes and drink. And then I want to say like season early in UK, it turned into a two drink minimum. And I think USA would just adopt it that. Because if they were drunk, it'd be a very different shot. The word lustful would go right out the window. I'll tell you that. Okay, maybe we should let next season let them get a little lickered up and show their true feelings. - Um, Des made me watch the world's cup last night. - I wrote down world's cup of water, but I don't remember what I was. - Water, water. - Oh, they're doing water breaks. That's like a drama. There's like a water break thing happening. They're called hydration breaks. I think it's for like advertising. - I don't know what it was. - Well anyway, I did watch. - Oh, I know what it was. Wait a minute. I've lived my whole life not knowing that when athletes are playing in a game of any sort. They're never drinking water. They're putting it in their mouth and they're spitting it out. No, they drink water. Oh, because everything in like the World Cup was like showing them like swishing it in their mouth and then spitting it out and I was like, oh, why are they doing that? And then the comments were like, no one's running with a full stomach of water. But also like, how are they not dehydrating, dehydrated and passing out? I do think it's a combination. I actually don't know about like soccer players. Maybe that is the thing that they're not like chugging water on the side, but like they have to stay hydrated to an extent. Like sometimes with tennis they'll have like electrolyte gels and stuff, but they're drinking water. Electrolite gel. See, this is a whole world I was never privy to. You're never privy too. That's why yeah, you do all, but you know what you'd love. If you start cramping, they give you a diet coke. No, that's just she. Because you need sodium. No way. I didn't know what what what about Gatorade? It's like they need even more. They need even more like they'll have you eat like McDonald's after just to get like salt. Okay. Now I'm actually calling the police. Why didn't anyone call me in sports? Are you kidding? I would have crushed just soccer game. Oh, I'm just going to sorry. I don't feel good. Let me get a diet coke in McDonald's. Well, that's why everyone's like you must have been so like fit during tennis. And I'm like the amount of calories I was eating was diabolical. I was doing pizza eating contest after practice. I was like, who thinks they could eat a pizza faster than me? You know, when I always loved in high school that when the track team would have a pizza party, I'm like, God, guys, you really knew the right team to join. You just have pasta parties. Oh, hell yeah. Car blow that shit. You know, we never talked about what the Empire State couple. You know Taylor Swift was like, guys, not this weekend. This weekend, you're not fucking climbing to the top. They were like Instagram models. Like, they were like really hot and cool. And they like proposed to each other. But no one talked, are they arrested now? Like, what's the vibe? I think they got arrested. It gets a felony. Yeah, you know what? Hot people get bored. They have like no issues in their life. They're like, what if we just. And let's talk about that because if they were bought ugly, people would be pissed. No, it's so true. The fact they were hot, everyone was like iconic. It was such a pretty privilege example. They were ugly. They'd never be allowed in New York City again. But instead, we were like, take a photo, put it in every pizza rhea. Like, these people are icons. That would have crushed on Tumblr. Oh, yeah. But you know what? I don't love it like even becoming a trend. Like, it's just, it's not. I do wonder what security's up to on Empire State Building. Where were they? Well, surely they snuck into the building. They were just like bandits. Like, the first time they walked in, I would have been like, that looks like a bank robber. And then what, they slept there the night before and then like, snuck out onto the top. Like, I don't even get the logistics of it. And also like, yeah, that's really scary. If this hot little brunette with a bob can get past the security, I'm worried. Yeah, I am worried. Taking a selfie up there, I would have dropped my phone. No, it would have been so clumsy. Also, it would have been chick. No. Well, you and I are similar. We have no adrenaline rush-seeking vibes, whatsoever. You're so right. Also, I feel like I got married like generations ago. Yeah, you've been married for 20 years. My wedding was not in this millennia. Like, no. I would have died so differently. It is so funny how like five years changed. Wait, really? What would you have done different? I mean, it was perfect, but like, I feel like my fashion's so different now. Like, I would have done like something crazy. I would have, I don't know, I literally went to a strip mall and was like, that looks good on my body. Yeah. No, Hannah, you picked to the first rush you tried on. I picked the first, which iconic? Which, some people say when you know, you know. But you know, you know. And I would have eloped. I could have seen you doing the courthouse and then having a dinner after. Yeah. That's what I would have done. But I also know what Taylor Swift felt where she was like, let's celebrate and make it a moment. Like, I mean, I had work hell. Am I wedding? I have the crazy shit happened at my wedding. So, oh, the one last thing I want to say about Taylor is she was on that interview show where she was like, I don't like people being on the cusp. Which is true. There's like, you're really close friends, then you have a lot of people that you're like, a ton of people that are on the cusp and you don't know what to do. So she's like, so I'm just going to invite a shit ton. But then it actually hurts more to not get invited because you're like, oh, I wasn't even in your top 1000. Well, when I saw the Blake Lively wasn't there, I was like, wait, this is actually, I feel like even more of a fuck you because it's like, Fergie's there. So, it's like, Adam Sam. I really, honestly, I hope that like Adam Sam are officiated. I don't. I feel like it was just like the most random event ever. It felt like the Oscars. I think my mindset would be the exact opposite. Like, oh, I don't want to have to evaluate my relationships with these people. It's like, my wedding's so small. It would be weird if you got invited. Like, not, oh, my wedding's so big. Everyone's calm. I'd be like, it's 50 people. I don't know you like that. I almost feel like her inviting not inviting Blake Lively, she knew would be such a story that like she hates her that much that she's like, I'm fine with that being the press on my wedding weekend. Well, she could have invited her and Blake said, no, but I don't want to see Blake saying no. No, no, no, no, no. I mean, look, she, I think she wanted people to talk about her marrying Travis and that's exactly what everyone's doing. So, I don't, and I don't think that's a bad thing. Zendaya didn't want anyone talking about her wedding and that's exactly what happened. Nobody talked about it. So, I think you do what you want. There was a really good TikTok. Someone made about who's like a big swifty and she was like, just want to reiterate you guys that, like, this isn't the end of the story. Like getting married is not your win in life. It's not like she went through all the up and downs for this moment and now everything is rams about her flies. Marriage is a huge decision in your life that could ruin your life. No, but also it could kill you. It could kill you. It could kill you. It could kill you. But also like, this is just one part of like all the beautiful things that she hopes to do in her life and this is not the win as a woman. Is not, oh, I got a man to like, do paperwork to be in the relationship. One of the girls on Love Island actually had a great point. She was like, getting picked isn't the prize. It's how he treats you. Which, honey, if I had a guy, I'd damn Nick. I actually get more of a high off of the guys who I didn't let pick me because I'm like, first of all, they, I feel like, put me on a pedestal in their head because they never know what it was actually like to date me. Like, they never got me. So like, it's like that, like, it's an illusion. It's like a situation ship. You're like, what, you made it all up in your head because you never actually experienced it. Yeah, like, they had like one good blow job by me and that's all they're left with. So like, that's, that's iconic to me. Like, can I ever tell you about the time I had sex with someone and he had a heart attack? I've never told that story. You've never, no, I feel like I definitely have to have. You've never told me. Like to the point where it was like page defibrillator in the closet, grab it. Why does he have a defibrillator in his closet? Because he had a heart problem. And like, not, this is like not shit. This is not, did he tell you beforehand? Like, this could happen. Yeah. Yeah. But wait, lowkey where you were like, if he doesn't have a hard dog, while I'm fucking him, like, that means I wasn't. Like, I didn't blow his brains out. Once the dust had settled and like, he was okay and we were like recovering from it, I obviously said, yeah, my pussy is fire. Literally, you almost died. You couldn't. No, I mean, this is so long ago. So like, were you scared that like, he might die? Yes, Hannah, I was terrified. Did you know how to use a defibrillator? No, it wasn't like, I feel like people are thinking, like, oh my god, page head sex with like an 85 year old man. Like, no, this was like a normal aged person who had like a heart problem. And literally, we slept together one time. It was one time, well, we slept together legitimately once. First question, were you guys drunk? Um, no, no. He, like, I don't think he, he like didn't do drugs. He didn't drink. Like, this was like a normal. I like, oh my god, this is so much. I was like 20. So second question, at what point was he like, did he immediately know he was having a heart attack or did it like take some time? I think we were like maybe like three minutes into it, maybe two to 30 into it. But two minutes in sex world is like 20 minutes. Yeah, you're right. Actually, let's say we're would say we're 45 seconds in maybe a minute, maybe a minute. We're in. He's like running on a treadmill. I'd have to call one of my girlfriends because I literally can't remember and over now. Wait, sex time is true. Like 10 minutes of sex feels like 10 minutes of running on the treadmill. Like you're like, I ran a marathon. I'm raw. I'm bleeding. I just heard like a thing inside of his body that could get like thrown off and got like a device. And so - Yeah. - If it got thrown off, he could fix it himself and it did. It got thrown off and I had to grab something and he did something and then he was fine. - Did you put on clothes, or were you running around naked? Trying to get it different really late? Like did you put your cute outfit back on before you saved his life? - This is very sad. When I was younger, I was so insecure about having small boobs. So I never took my bra off or took my top off really. So I think I probably had a top on. - Okay. - And his roommate was there. - We thought so funny. - I'm pretty sure. - I literally have to call my one of my girlfriends and ask her because she'll remember. - I was always the opposite. Like taking off my underwear was like, that was the final boss. But like top off, that's like, good morning. - No. - But I also, I just don't like wearing a bra. I also, I wouldn't wear a bra. - I never wear a bra. - Yeah, I never wear a bra. So it's like, go ahead. That was very lustful of us. Very lustful. Wait, I'm not done with my question. So then when you were defer being him, did you, was it easy? Or were there like a lot of steps? - No, no, no. I just had to hand him something and then he knew exactly what to do. It wasn't like he passed out and like was about to die. It was like, something was happening and he was like, holy shit. You gotta go get that, like, get off. After he did it, did you guys finish? Or were you like, maybe we, maybe we just call the night? - No, no. - Were you like, well, I need to finish? 'Cause like, I was like, I wanna go home. I wanted to go home. I was like, it was traumatizing. It was older than me. And it was like, I didn't really, no. We weren't like ever, like we were never like together. We never like went out on dates. Like it was like a random hookup one time and I was just like, yeah, this is like, not for me. - In my special, I've a bit about how the true walk a shame is when you have to walk into his bedroom with all the roommates who were like playing FIFA on the couch. Like why are there always like 20 men at guys' apartments? Like, oh my God, that's such a feeling that I like forgot. That's such a college. I even felt that in so long. When you're literally have to be like, I'm gonna go get dicked down. Hold on one sec, guys. - Oh. - And you're like, pray for me. You're like, oh. - It's also just like men are so misogynistic that like you feel, they make you feel slutty for even walking in. - Yeah. - Do you know what I mean? Like, I don't know. I just feel like there are situations that you get in as a growing up in a woman and you're in college where there's so many times where you're just like, I know they're saying some really crazy misogynistic shit. - Also as a woman, did you know that like men most men think if you go back to their place, that means like you want to have sex? - Yeah. - I can see that. - What if you just want to- - Well, I think it's more, I think it's, look, if I'm going home after the date, I don't fuck with you. I didn't fuck with you on the date. I don't want to spend any more time with you. If I'm going home with you after the date, it's not necessarily that I want to sleep with you. I just want to continue hanging out. - Exactly, we're guys, we'll take it as like, she for sure wants to have sex. - No, it's like an after dinner drink or like- - Yeah, you want to keep talking, you want to possibly let them touch your boob. But this is also when I was younger. - Yeah, this is like, I wouldn't do that now. - Like when I was like, even in college, I was like, okay, OTPHJ, you get, but I was also scared. Terrified. - Yeah, I'm still scared. I'm still scared. After reading the book, strangers, anything could happen. I think about it all the time. I'm like, you don't know any of these men. We don't know any of them. - I also learned a new term, which I, I don't know if you connect with, 'cause you're like better at it than me, but I definitely connect with it. It's called post gossip clarity. - I just saw that on TikTok. I literally reposted it. I've never felt something deeper in my life. The amount of times where I've spilled my fucking guts and I've been like, why the hell did I tell her that? - So for people who don't know, it's like guys say they have post not clarity, where after they come, they like suddenly see everything clearly and regret everything. We're like, post gossip clarity. I didn't realize how much in my life, I would gossip to connect with people. - It's also because like you think, see it as like a vulnerable thing, and that's how you connect with people. - Yeah, I ended up being vulnerable. - Here's the thing, there's layers. - I don't feel like that with you. I hear a juicy story. The first thing I'm like is Hannah's gonna die when I tell her this. - If anything, I get mad when I don't give you enough gossip. I'm like, I didn't do well enough today. - Someone like outside my circle. I'm very like maybe I'll give you like a little more so, but what are you giving me back? And like I feel like that's something you learn like late 20s, early 30s. Like actually, I'm not telling you anything. But that was like my mid 20s, I feel like, 'cause you don't even know who side anyone is on. But I would say one thing I learned as someone who's heard people talk bad about herself, which is not an uncommon thing, is a lot of the time it literally isn't personal. Like you think someone's like, oh fuck, that person thinks that about me. And it's like, no, they were just trying to be cool with that other person. And once you realize that, you actually get a lot of confidence in life and be like, oh, they actually like, or they actually like respect you. And that's why they're trying to bring you down 'cause they both put you on a pedestal and that's why they're trying to pull down. - Or they're psychotic and they literally want to be used and where you like last year's Versace, which really happens to me a lot. - And that's why we thrift. Just do some consignment shopping and figure it out. So overall, how's your VK going besides the anal fissures? - It's amazing, I've done so much good shopping and I just feel so like, I feel so disconnected that it's like so nice. Like I forgot what it was like living in the real world and not on the internet. Like the more you immerse yourself in the real world, the more you realize the things you read on the internet are insane written by insane people. - Well, when you travel, you just realize like, oh, the world is so much bigger or when you're online, it feels so small and like. - And it's also, I'm also like, oh wow, these are the only people plus Hannah that I actually give a shit about in the world that people I'm with right now. Like I haven't looked at my phone 'cause I'm like the only person that's texting me as Hannah and she's working. (laughing) - And she's going through something right now. - Wait, I'm so happy that you're in this mindset. I also can, you're tan and-- - I might skip dinner tonight and just you room service. My dad is going to like really kill me, but like I think I need to give my stomach a little bit of a break. - You need to look out for yourself in these moments. Also let the family try to talk about something else. - Other than me. - Yeah, give them a moment. It's like when I wouldn't go to school one day, I'm like, what are people talking about if I'm not there? - I can't perform in the pool. I can't perform at lunch. I can't then go to dinner and do a one-woman show. I'm talking, and call back, riff, call back, riff. - My brother though, he's pretty good. - Yeah, no, let him, let him, let him, let him. - My dad's like, when are we making another TikTok? I have to figure out the TikTok situation for my dad. Like, you know, it's okay. - It's okay. It's a lot of strategizing. - I also haven't been taking a lot of pictures because I'm just like, I don't care. - He does and I never take photos. I'm like, there's no evidence that we've ever been together, we're alive. And I want to do a quick shout out. All like, there's so many gigglers in Toronto 'cause Toronto's like really cool. And full of just like hot girls, being girls girls. Every girl comes up to me and goes, sorry about your smile. So like, immediately I don't feel rude when they're like, hi, and I'm like, I dinner and I'm like, hi. So I want to say, if you're a giggler and you see me, tell me you know about the smile thing 'cause it helps me like with the social interaction. And then I'm like at ease, 'cause I don't want to have to like, tell you what I'm dealing with. 'Cause like you don't want that. - You don't know how to explain yourself, yeah, on your strength. - And I'm giving the smiley selfies with just a little kissy face and it's like, it's working. - It's chic. It's cute. - It's chic and um. - We're gonna look back on this time and be like, ha ha, he he, funny, you know. That's not this time right now, we will get there. We're gonna get there together. - Does is that I'm snarling. It's a snarle. Okay, guys. - What are those dogs and what are those dogs and what are those dogs? - Wait, wait, there was a dog sitting next to us at dinner and does goes, that's your smile. And the dog was like. - Like a beijon, like my, like one of my boyfriend's families had this dog like a lopsa, I think it was called like a, and it had like. - Lopsa, that sounds like a beijon. - It looked like a beijon. - No, it like a beijon, but it was like had an under bite. No, it shouldn't. - I look like a little dog that you could, that's biting people's ankles. That's what I look like. - Okay, and that's all we have for today. - Well, no, it hasn't gotten better, but we love you guys so much. And what are you doing? We'll talk to you later in the week. Bye. (upbeat music)