Giggling about handshakes, bandwagons, and New Yorkers

what's up gigglers gary fix your wi-fi manifest that shit we can't be managed i mean the day just got away from me okay we're doing a social experiment this morning we're we're recording giggly squad at 8 a.m just just for fun to see what would happen i packed a whole outfit to look cute and then i walked in i go not the vibe you're literally my mom you go so you didn't clean i cleaned for 30 minutes i got this new maroon top that's like leather on the top and then like has like like fringe on the bottom and i had like white jeans this apartment has never seen a fringe and i go you know what i'm gonna stay in what i'm wearing so we're sitting on my couch because page has a pant it's a whole thing it's a whole thing it's a whole thing and i it's a whole thing first of all nick's just lost that's why i'm wearing black oh my black nick shirt and but last night poor grace grace had a whole day with me we did seth myers we were running around i feel like i'm gonna turn and look at you i'm uncomfortable good thing you're wearing sunglasses yeah okay so she i basically after seth myers was like what are you doing for the next game and she's like i don't know i'm like okay i'm gonna come over and hang out yeah and i forget that i'm her boss because i'm like maybe she's had a whole day with me right and maybe she doesn't want her boss coming over yeah so i come in i come in at like 8 30 jump on the couch with her immediately start facetiming you so her boss comes over i'm in shock and all that you guys are hanging out we're literally on a sleepover yeah i order pizza and then me and you are loudly facetiming and grace is just sitting there like can i have a day can i have a minute in my own home at 10 p.m like for a second i'm like maybe she doesn't want to feel like me and you are at one point when we were on the phone i was gonna ask grace to look something up for me and then i go and then in my head i was like no it's 10 p.m and she's on her own couch like i'm not gonna ask her a favor right now i actually wanted her to look up what the weather was gonna be like today for my outfit that i didn't end up wearing wait my favorite thing is waking up and like asking my mom what the weather is and i asked des and he goes look it up and i'm like you've been up since 6 a.m yeah just tell me what the vibes are also you can look at the weather app but you don't really know the vibe exactly i go to my window every day i look at the girls on the street i go are they in jackets or just long sleeve shirts are they in short sleeve shirts is it a light jacket tell you is there is it a caprice and you don't i never look at the men because their temperature is not so if i see a girl in a workout outfit plus a hoodie it's a little chilly out wait i have to say something about the next i'm not saying anything negative about the next like i'm so proud of them i really hope it's their time the instagram videos of all the guys outside i can't do it i actually can't do it anymore someone goes this is their errors tour like when all the men are outside msg together like chanting and singing literally just kiss because they're like fighting each other they like want to hug they want to hug so bad but they're like they like are doing it in like a beat-up way and i'm like just hug so the best part about it is page keeps now has nicks on our algorithm and she's realizing that guess who's commenting on all of these videos it's crazy every time i look in the comments and i see your name i i'm like go next i'm laughing but like i saw a video last night when they lost and the streets were crazy and i'm like women are emotions what are you talking you just beat up a guy for wearing a jersey that you don't for wearing an outfit you don't like you beat up a man for wearing an outfit you don't like but we're the problem for wearing a guy's name that you don't like because you don't like that guy he's like that guy's wearing black and gray and we're not wearing black and gray tonight it's like okay regina no but talk about me no literally talk about mean girls they're like i don't like the guys you support i'm so obsessed with it but i'm also like now i'm nervous for them because the nicks have been so mean to me i'm like i don't like the guys you support i'm so obsessed with it for so long and now they're like supposed to win and i'm like don't put that on these guys my first thought last night was are any did any of them pop a beta before they came out tonight because what if like they're so nervous i'm like the pressure i know but um the gigglers were funny they there's some spurs fans obviously who are gigglers and this is a safe space for you guys we just sorry where are they even from san antonio we've been there remember nope you remember i don't it was a dark time the only thing i know about the spurs is that eva longoria's ex-husband used to play with sony parker and he's french and and he this is like a hot french guy and he cheated on her whilst i think he was still playing that's the only thing i know about spurs an athlete cheated yeah my nana was visiting grace last week while i was traveling okay everyone's just hanging with grace look grace is like look we she left her family she left her sometimes i'm like do you want to rent a grandma so i was like nana go visit grace calls grace and goes i made pesto do you know what pesto is she's like you're fair skin you have blue eyes so you probably don't know marinara do they know what linguine is but she literally said do you know what pesto is you ever had a baby clam ever you guys like seafood in north carolina you ever had a baby clam you ever put a breadcrumb on the baby clam a little olive oil on a clam you call it a clams casino you might call it something else where you're from and then you take the bread and you soak it wait so nana literally it was like rent a grandma yeah you know when you just miss your grandparents and i was like what's up about my grandpa anyway so then she visited and i was like ask them about brooklyn in the in the 30s or whatever ask why you were giving her questions i said ask nana about the apartment she made a biography but old people love talking about and it's like you never get to hear history from the horse's mouth yeah her story so that was fun um oh one last next thing so i took my dad to a practice i was not the game yesterday i took him to a practice and we're in the hallway and i see fat joe i know that's his name but that sounds like a name that we nicked to name like my old situation i remember fat joe no that's the guy on hinge in my phone that i'm like please don't text him again so i see fat joe coming towards me and this is the new york is like healed right now like new york people in the streets are like saying good morning one of my friends was on the bus with fat joe and timothy chalamet i dm'd i was like oh yeah where are you are you kidnapped are you getting trapped she was wearing a bandana as a shirt i go what is happening alexa and i was walking on the street two days ago middle of the day and people are just yelling go next yeah i'm like this is crazy i made a tick tock yesterday i was like i don't know what the caption is so i just did go next i know i know but i got home and i realized i was in nick's shirt so that makes sense but i didn't realize i was wearing nick's shirt at the time but um the new yorkers are literally like they've never been nicer wait the other day i was getting off in the airplane and i was it was me and joe and some girl turned and goes are you guys going to the game and i didn't think she was talking to me so i didn't say anything and in my head i was like what fucking game i thought you were talking to the guy behind me because i was like i don't know what game you have the game of life but that's what college is like when you're at a sports school okay every sunday it's like about the game like everyone's going the game everyone's watching the game everyone if we win or lose is affected by the game but anyway so i see fat joe and i don't bother celebrities you guys know me yeah you know me i'm like that this girl did a tick tock where it's like when you see a celebrity and you think you're cool because you're not speaking to them that's literally me i'm like i'm so respectful right now anytime i walk by julianne moore anywhere in the city i'm like is that like a regular occurrence yeah i'd be like julianne moore is like always out in the city i've seen her like four times and she has red hair so it's like you see her you see her yeah um i've never said hi once but wait you're so cool for that thank you i've seen her at dinner i've seen her at lunch in my head i'm like well one day when i'm in a movie with her that's when i'll meet her yeah why force it on her now right why bother her dating right but i see fat joe and i was like it's the it's the knicks like i'm saying hi to fat joe as he's coming towards me and he's coming towards me with his click yeah like he rolls with a click um those do you think he came up with the name fat joe or do you think someone was like great question joe this is the thing as he's walking towards me i'm like i don't feel like i should call him fat joe i feel like i don't like speaking about people's bodies so then i just go hi mr joe but but that's my move you guys i've done it before it works they love it i did it to rick ross i said hi mr joe and i'm like oh my god i'm like oh my god i'm like oh my god i'm like oh my god i'm like oh my god i'm like oh my god i'm like oh my god i'm like oh my god i'm like oh my god i'm like oh my god i'm like oh my god i'm like oh my god i'm like oh my god ross wait that where i'm like oh my god i'm like oh my god i'm like oh my god i'm like oh my god ross where i'm like oh my god i'm like oh my god i'm like oh my god ross where did you run into rick ross dj khaled on the well dj khaled his he's everywhere that okay as someone who doesn't give a fuck about sports is dj khaled in new york no he's a miami heat fan when i saw that last night on the tv i was like fake i was like why the hell would they let dj khaled sit on the court no that's well maybe he just paid for it but no but the knicks are have been really strict about who's on celebrity what celebrities are at the next yeah you have to be like a hard tracy morgan ben stiller well because also there's wait did you see the thing that jennifer lopez said oh yeah that was like j-lo you're only a new yorker if you're born here this is my thing with j-lo she loves a villain arc i actually did watch her new movie on netflix stop moving your tongue like that what you were just moving your tongue yes i was talking wait i did not am i becoming like a crazy old person who doesn't know what my limbs are doing at all times wait so if i see fat joe i say hi mr joe in front of all of his friends yeah and i and then i just go to dab him up pat was there pat saw it and he looks at me and he just dabs my ass up and then did you hug no but dabs are like more intimate than hugging because we did a full secret handshake yeah do you know how to dab yeah i'm a loser hannah wait that was really good but your fingers are so long i got lost in it wait that was really smooth um actually that's like a non-sexual thing that i find attractive like when guys like see each other for the first time and they like dap each other up and one time i had a boyfriend who couldn't doubt no he had never dapped anyone like his friends would walk in and they'd say like hey and i'd be like i have to run away i'm like none of you ever played sports in high school so i have to go there's nothing hotter than two guys who just met smoothly dapping yeah there's like dap chemistry between guys they also have levels to it like yeah they're not pulling in if they don't know you know which i think is so and then there's a there's a snap sometimes yeah that's like they're real good when they snap that's fully mary-kate and ashley when they do a snap yeah they love it they love their secret handshakes um so honestly it went it like went the interaction went really well and then he walked off and i think they were doing a podcast and one of his podcast producers was like my wife really loves you guys and i was like so i'm in with fat joe yeah then i just almost wanted to start walking with this click i was like you're one of fat joe's groupies yeah i wonder like his friends definitely don't call him like fat joe hey fat it's like lady gaga like you don't call her lady but i think they're calling her stephanie i think they're just joe joe wait okay so back to the j-lo thing what do you think how many years or do you think you have to be born because you're born new york so you're a true new yorker do you think you have to be born and raised in new york or do you think you have to live here for a certain amount of years this is the thing i feel like she i feel like she got annoyed that people made fun of her for the like orange soda thing yeah she's on her own tour yeah like her own revenge tour she's on her revenge tour with it um okay i am a firm believer that what makes new york so beautiful is that it's a melting pot of so many different cultures that have come from so many different places and that's what makes new york so great miss usa and peace and world peace but i always tell people like if you can survive new york like you're a new yorker there's a girl on tiktok say like the saying is like after you've lived here for 10 years you're a new yorker and someone was like but there's inflation so it should be 20 years and i thought that was good i think it's like a like i think grace is a new yorker i think it's an energy you're a new yorker when you're here and you're i think if you've gotten into a physical altercation at la guardia you're a new yorker if you've yelled at anyone at a major airport in new york city you're a new yorker yeah but i also feel like this is the thing if i move out of new york i'm still a new yorker yeah if someone else is not from new york moves out of new york you're not a new yorker anymore right that's the biggest difference i would agree with that that's the biggest difference but like i always say you come in new yorkers i'm gonna chew you up and spit you out new york is crazy there was every block is insane right now and if you can just like laugh at it and enjoy it yeah i will say after living in new york for i don't think i'm one of my 12 years you're a new yorker 11 or 12 years going anywhere else you're a new yorker you're a new yorker you're a new yorker and being there for like longer than a week you're kind of like what do you guys do like what what do you guys do every day like there's so much energy in new york that isn't in other places like so overstimulating other place is so much slower and it's like wow this is how you guys live every day well i understand why people think new yorkers are assholes because every block something's happening on that block that would be like headline local news yeah but it's not always mean like i've been no not the country where people have been way meaner to me in the middle of the street new yorkers are you just cannot talk to every single person because every single person's having like the craziest thing happened in their life in that moment but if you walk down the street anywhere in new york and you're like what's the time like someone is they'll tell you responding to you you can just yell it and someone responds also there's such a freedom that you can just cry and no one cares and you can wear whatever you want because no one knows where you're going that is so so you could have been coming from a gala they don't know i feel like there's some places where everyone's like wearing the exact same outfit doing the exact same thing new york you're so right you couldn't wear anything a bdsm outfit and people are like she's going somewhere yeah you know that feeling when your ponytail suddenly feels a little fuller or when you head out the door and you realize you didn't even need to do that last mirror check to make sure everything's sitting right those small moments start to add up and before you know it you just feel like yourself again neutralize yourself and you're like oh my god i'm so sorry i'm so sorry i'm supports hair health from within helping you grow stronger visibly thicker hair so those that feeling when moments happen more often than not neutrophil is the number one dermatologist recommended hair growth supplement brand and it's the number one hair growth supplement brand personally used by dermatologists neutrophils hair growth supplements are peer-reviewed nsf certified for sport and clinically tested it's not one size fits all approach neutrophil offers multiple formulas for men and women and it's a great way to get rid of your hair so let your hair be the one less thing you have to worry about see visibly thicker stronger faster growing hair in three to six months with neutrophil for a limited time neutrophil is offering our listeners ten dollars off your first month's subscription and free shipping when you visit neutrophil.com and enter promo code giggly that's neutrophil.com spelled n-u-t-r-a-f-o-l.com promo code giggly wait since this is a sports podcast yeah the next thing i wanted to bring up that's like really causing me anxiety is the fifa world cup where are they putting all these god damn people where is it it's in new jersey what is that met life what but like how are they getting there wait foreigners going to new jersey makes me laugh so hard it's like a whole crazy thing because everyone's like well we'll just walk to the stadium everyone in new jersey is like no wait british people new jersey makes me laugh so much anyone in new jersey makes italians in new jersey they're gonna like fight with the american they change like all the airbnb rules like now everyone's airbnb in their house wow i'm nervous i'm just confused like met life is such a man because like they're like yeah like we can do it we'll host it and it's like okay like we're gonna come we're gonna go have you ever done this before yeah like we're gonna go to met life's house this weekend like did you get all the necessary like drinks and like food and met life's kind of like yeah we'll figure it out when you get here and it's like okay well there's nowhere to park i love that you're in all the new jersey neighborhood like drama are you gonna be a new jersey housewife no started watching rhode island their accent is a combination of new york and boston i do also like don't tell love island they'll blow their mind don't tell love island where rhode island is they'll freak out i can't get myself to watch love island i saw that intro that's kind of catchy what was the intro what's with the music video that they do for the intro they go oh yeah is it going like this with their arms see if i'm ariana i'm getting that taken out of my contract but she loves singing and dancing oh she but like i if someone said we're doing a music video for i'm like no also are the people like getting in a huge fight and crying and then they're like hey we have to actually shoot the intro right now like you know how reality tv works you know they just like someone just got in a fight and they were like now we're doing the intro well no because it's real time oh wait did you watch it the intro i just see it on my tiktok it's really where the contestants in together like it was like separate then they shoot they shoot it separately oh and then one girl was like doing splits the whole time and i'm like that would have been me if i knew how to do it thank god you don't know how to do it thank that would actually i think it would ruin our friendship no for sure i'd be in a split right now yeah speaking of splits I would end every sentence with a spoiler. Period. That would be my period. Also. Did you see Dua Lipa's wedding? You loved it. I love her. Yeah. I'm obsessed with her. Because I love people where I'm like, that's not a real person. That's not a real person. That's not a real life story. You're telling me they met reading the same book? Yeah. Come on. Yeah. Come on. I did see some like TikTok drama. I'm lucky if a guy like. Can read a text? I can't even think of something. Knows what CCing is? My heart is so low at 33. Reading the same book and they were on the same chapter. And he said to her, I guess we're on the same page. Shut up. No, that was a publicist put that together. I think that romantic stuff doesn't happen to me because I would be like. Like if a guy was sitting next to me. And we were reading the same book and he was like, ha ha, we're on the same page. I'd be like, get away from me. Not to put Grace on blast for the third time on this podcast, but we love her dating stories. And I'm not going to get into detail of it. But she basically went on this like horrible date. And at the end, he said one of the funniest things I've ever heard. He just goes after a horrible date, like horror, like the worst shit you can imagine. He looks at her and he goes, we're going to make history together. And I think that's how I'm going to end every phone call from now on. Like, how did you not call the police after that? I'm like history. Am I going to be in a Netflix doc where like I'm fucking my skin is hanging in a basement? Like, what do you mean we're making history together? From now on, that's how I'm changing my signature in my email. Like that is. We're going to make history. He also told her my dad is paying for this, which low key, I'm like, at least I know where the source is coming from. At least I have an honest kid. At least I don't have to dig for like info. Yeah. Okay. Update. Secret Lives of Mormons. Yeah. So as you guys know, Paige like put on a season three. Were you on season three? Who knows? Who knows? But I was like, okay, I'll just start from season three. You watched it in like a crazy format. A crazy format because I felt like if I watched it this way, I wasn't like actually watching it. Yeah. You're tricking yourself. So I was like, I'll watch. I'll finish watching what Paige put on. Right. And then I was like, well, that doesn't make sense. So I'm going to go to the season before that. Yeah. So I finally last night was like, okay, none of this makes sense because I'm watching it in reverse. Let me go to season one. Let's just watch season one, episode one. And I finally committed. I need to like write Whitney Leavitt a handwritten note. Also, Demi is so hard to say. I want to say Demi so bad. But I think you can. I respect her culture. Yeah. No one was mad at Demi at all. In the first season? Yeah. No. No, because they hated Whitney so much. And then. And then it like immediately flip flop. No, it's it's some of the best reality TV. And but the edit is so clear to me. Like there's this moment where you could tell Whitney has a reason she doesn't like Taylor and you're allowed to like be hurt and not like someone. Well, because Whitney really. She's not fake because they are all Mormon and a lot of them are married and like love their husbands. Whitney, I think, takes her marriage. Not even like the religion aspect. I think she takes her marriage the most serious of like all the other girls. The other girls are like, I will divorce tomorrow if you let me. Yeah. Which I like. I love that, too. I love that, too. But like, I feel like she her and her husband, I feel like they really do love each other. It's the thing with reality TV, too, is you have to be fake to make it work. Totally. Where Whitney, she's like, you told everyone that me and my husband were swinging. He also was cheating on me. She she she opens up. She opens up and tells everyone. And I'm not saying anyone's good or evil or to root for when you are. I'm just when I was watching it, I was like, Whitney's also a performer. So you could tell that she was giving them stuff like even the Fruity Pebbles thing. You could tell the producers were like, this will be a great scene. We don't have anything going on tonight. Can you just put this together? She'll think it's funny. She showed up and did it. She didn't do anything that you you could tell it was like for TV. And then when there was nothing life ruining. Also, you know. With the episode starts and Taylor, Frankie Paul's like, I just hope that all my friends show up to this baby shower, even though I haven't seen them all in a year. And last time they saw me, I was getting arrested. But I hope they all come to support me. And every three seconds, I hope all my friends are going to be there. I hope all my friends are going to be that, you know, that the producers told Whitney, like some people are coming somewhere. Like whatever, you don't have to go. So then the whole thing becomes how horrible Whitney is. And when he's like, I haven't talked to her in a year. That's weird. Yeah. And that's totally that. Like, wait, you're just. You're supposed to show up with a baby trunk at a baby shower. You don't really want to go to. I'm like, I don't even want to be here. Look at how my gift is the best. And now I'm leaving. And then there's a scene where Whitney and Taylor finally have their talk to like work it out. And as someone who understands a little how the sausage is made, you can tell that the conversation is going too well. Like they're getting along. They're getting like they're understanding each other. Like Taylor's like, I understand. I hurt you. And I'm sorry. And when he's like, thank you for listening. Like, and then they're like, Demi, go fuck that shit up. Like Demi runs in and then just starts yelling at Whitney. And I'm like, Whitney and Taylor, it was working too good. And producers were like, we got to create a fight. How is there not a scripted show about a reality show? Unreal is like the one show. Yeah. But that's almost like they tried. They made that show so serious. Like that show wasn't funny. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And it is. There's a definitely funniness to it. Yeah. There's a funniness to thinking about like all these people sitting because they do sitting around like a boardroom and being like, what's going to really piss her off this summer? Yeah. You know, like what's going to really grind her gears? Yeah. So but then also the fact that like Whitney just kept crying and like feeling misunderstood and like running away. Like the fact that people saw that and were like, fuck her. She's evil. It's just the masses can be asses. You heard it here first. The masses can be asses. Well, yeah. Also, like there's something really dark that people that you don't know have the power to like change your reputation from year to year. Like Whitney went from the most hated to then like, okay, semi hated to then the most loved. And she's the same person. She's the same person throughout the whole thing. But also. And so that's like really mental. I didn't watch season two. She definitely stopped talking, right? A little bit. Yeah. She was like, cool. Yeah. I guess I'm not going to. I guess every time I talk, it's going to be a thing. Yeah. So I'm going to stop talking. So it's really there's like such a lack of critical thinking skills from a lot of people. But yeah, I love revisiting things that in the moment it was everyone jumped on the bandwagon. I hate a bandwagon. Yeah, you do. I hate it. The second I see it, I'm like, I can't support this bandwagon. Like, I don't even know what I'm doing. I don't know what happened. And I'm like, I don't like this bandwagon. And but people it's like when people see a line outside and they're like, it must be good. I'm going to wait in that line. I'm like, those are psychotic people. Yeah. But I don't believe the line. I've ever met someone that's waited in a line. Next time you see a bandwagon or a line, think twice. OK, that's how we're going to wait. I have a question for you, because this came up in just like my daily life last night. And then I was like, oh, I wonder what Hannah does. How do you organize like your day, like your to do list for the day? I have a note. It says shit to do like the iPhone notes or you have a separate notes app. OK. And you do have like an everyday one. I have like this is a to do list. And it's just for today. It's like my life one that I'm like, because every day I try to get it down to zero. Oh, wow. But the truth is, you try and get that list down to zero. How many things are on that list right now? So I have four like things. These are like work things. These are like things that aren't don't need to get done. Where? What's like your. Oh, yeah. Then there's a to do now. Oh, my God. Then there's a different from the other to do. Yeah. A long to do. Then you have like a. I've actually got it to do. Honestly, because my specials out, I'm kind of living like fuck my day to day. I'm like, we just got to focus on the special right now. OK. But my to do list on my phone runs my life. How do you know what like what? How do you do your calendar? Like my calendar. Also, are you? Yeah. What are you saying? Do you know? Does doesn't use a calendar on his phone? No. Also, I have to apologize. Everyone's mad. He's not a boomer. He's a Gen X. I apologize. It just boomers way funnier to say. Oh, my God. That's giving. I'm not Gen Z. I'm shut up. I know people were like, your husband's not a boomer. And I was like, he's my husband. I'll talk shit when I want to. But whatever. Both of them. He just doesn't housing crisis. So does it really matter? I said, you don't use your Google calendar. And he's like, I don't use my Google calendar. I'm like, how do you know what's happening two weeks from now? And he points to his head. That's how people used to do stuff back then, though. No, people always had calendars, even though it wasn't in their phone. He's not. I don't know how he does anything. If I don't write it down, it doesn't happen. It's not happening. I have my calendar. My calendar runs everything. But my problem is if I don't look at it in the morning, like I'm fucked. Okay. My notes app is also I treat it as like a manifestation. So like, so I don't have have it doesn't say to-do list it says i get to like i get to do this isn't that who told you to do that i made it up in my head did you really yeah and then each day i have it like my schedule and then my to-do list someone dm'd me and said i think you might be a little ocd and i said let me look into it because that's on your list too so i think i i think i get to be ocd i think i could be slightly a little ocd well look not to overanalyze but that's we've made a whole career please i actually have been getting less and less anxious like i socialized all weekend and i didn't give a fuck but this is the thing with ocd it's a it all is combined so like you can get ocd because you're trying to control the future which is a symptom of anxiety like i would be ocd when i had a tennis match i would have to like do all these like anything i didn't want to do i'd make myself do or like someone would like drop trash like across the street and i'd be like i'm gonna go pick that up because i'll win my match if i do like i would like do like that's almost like a superstitious it was superstitious but like if i didn't do it i'd feel like interesting do you get that when you are gonna do your special i was i get a little a little freaky like right before a big event where i'm just like where you tasks i i just like sometimes i'll do things i don't want to do because i think it's good karma something a man's never said sometimes i do things i don't want to do never they've never done that um yeah i get that but anyway i get to i get to do stuff i get to and i think that's a really beautiful do you know if you started a book called i get to you could be mel robbins actually she's gonna steal it she's already written it the new i get to let them is i get to i get to be annoyed today like i get to be i get to be pissed off yeah i get to be irritated like this morning i was like anxious and then i was like why i get to like go hang out with my friend in her dirty apartment yeah on her couch yeah which just be you love slumming it up with me i love it because i can like there's no pressure Ed visited me yesterday, and we ate Chinese food, and then he started cleaning it up, and I was like, hey, hey, we don't have to do that here. I go, mom's not here. Mom's out for the night. The parents are away. The kids will play. No, you are the definition of that. Like, at 34, you're like, there's no parents here. We can leave the plates in the sink forever. Who's going to yell at us? And my dad looks at me, he's like, this is fucking awesome. No, your dad's like, wait, seriously? I was like, we could drink as many sodas as we want. But my dad, actually, when I was low with my dad, he'd be like, let's get ice cream, don't tell mom. Would your dad do that stuff ever? No. Because he was really scared of her. No, my dad's scared of my mom. The only time that's ever happened is one time my dad took me to the gas station, and they, behind the thing, they had these, like, light-up belly buttons, and I was like, dad, I don't get that light-up belly button ring. Like, I think I'll die. And I was, like, eight, and he was like, totally. And so he buys me this light-up belly button ring, and I go home, and I'm like, I put it in my belly button. It's a fake one. Yeah, obviously. It's like this little, like, button thing that you, like, clicked, and it, like, was all these colors, and you put it in your. I thought you were like, I'm bleeding in the gas station. And my mom took one look at it, and she was like, what the fuck is that? She was so mad at my dad. She took the light-up belly button ring. She's like, that's a gateway drug. Next thing you know, she's on a pole. Yeah, literally, she was like, you're never. I could never pierce my belly button. I still think about it all the time. Do you remember when girls were piercing their belly button? Yeah, it's actually, like, really upsetting to me. I'd never crossed my desk. I was, like, the owl. I think I cried about it at, like, 17. Like, please, let me get my belly button pierced. Gen Z's don't pierce their lip. Do you remember the girls were piercing their lip? No, you are a real New Yorker. Yeah, New York girls. They had crazy piercings. One time I did buy, like, a fake tongue ring. Because you're a freak. Yeah, and I loved it. But, like, I was like, I'm going to choke and die. True. Because it was, like, a suction cup. Yeah, that's. I wore it, like, to one night out, and I was like, it's not who I am. Like, I want to be her, but it's just, like, it's not who I am. No, girls would have, like, one lip ring, and it looked so uncomfortable. I was like, how do you speak? How do you do anything? But it was, like, they committed to the bit. You know what I never liked? I liked, like, I didn't mind a nose ring, but I never understood when girls would get, like, their eyebrow pierced. Like, that always freaked me out. I was like, oh, you're mischievous. You're cool. Yeah, like, you do, you stay out. Do you know what I would do now if I was 22? What? I would shave part of my eyebrow. Like, a line in my eyebrow. Why? Why do you have to be 22? You get to. You get to be any age you want. You totally do. You can be any age. You can be any age you want. But we are of the age where now, like, I'll put an outfit on, I'm like, it's a little too young for me. I know, same. Which is weird. I went to a club on Friday night, and I was, and I put an outfit on, and I was like, no, I can't wear that to a club. What'd you wear? I wore sheer. I wore, wait, I didn't even tell you this. No, you saw my TikTok. Yeah. Oh, wait, no. You were waiting to announce that you're woman of the week. I'm woman of the week. Can you, I actually saw it, and I was like, I'm saving it. Tell me in depth, like, details. I have these black sheer capris from Magda Boutram, but they're, like, regular pants. Like, they have, like, a zipper and, like, a button, but they're completely sheer. And they give you these, like, black granny panties to, like, basically wear with them. I lost the underwear that goes with the pants, and I was like. Maybe you could have Instacarted underpants. It didn't even cross my mind, because I had to leave in, like, 20 minutes. Got it. So I was like, okay. Okay. And I wasn't there at the time, because I would have given you options. I didn't have any black, like, bathing suit bottoms that were, like, full coverage. Paige, the fact you don't have one granny panty lying around is. I don't own one thing that covers my ass. Yeah, you don't have any bikinis that cover your butt. No. Why? Who makes them? I've never seen one. It's never crossed my desk. I've never seen one. All my underwear, even my period underwear, chic, sexy. Laced, right? They're laced. Like. They're gorgeous. So I'm like, what the fuck am I going to do? I have one pair of, like, Victoria's Secret, where it's, like, a thick band, but it's still a thong, but it's, like, cheeky, kind of. Yeah. So I put them on, and I'm like, no, my whole asshole is still out. I take another pair of underwear, and you know how, like, a thong, obviously, the front is more coverage. So I flipped it around. So then I had two pairs of underwear on. So you are basically thonging yourself. You're thonging yourself from the front and the back. Flanking my whole body. Yeah. Guillotining yourself. My vagina. I'm like, don't worry, it'll just be a couple hours. If there was any time, any time I was going to get a UTI, it was in that moment, because I'm, like, so, my vagina's, like, suffocating. You get to have a UTI? I get to. And there's some girls out there that don't even have a vagina, and they'd love a UTI. Wait, that's incredible. Yeah. So I was, like, so. I was so proud of myself. So I wore sheer capris and this, like, gold top, and I loved my outfit. So it was a great night. Do you know that when someone comes over to give me a spray tan, I don't have a thong? Well, like, I do have a thong, but. Wait. The only thong I have is, like, a lace thong that I've never worn, but I have for emergencies. I'm not wearing a lace thong to get spray tan. So I wear my granny panties, and then I just scrunch it in my butt. Like, I give myself a wedgie, and I go, go for it. Wait, Hannah, I'm going naked. I'm not going naked. First of all, I have a family. Wait. Wait. I don't go naked. Am I weird for going naked? Yeah. I'm labia out. She's like, kick your leg out. I'm like, for sure, girl. Dude, I'm naked even if I have my period. I've got a tampon in there. And you're just hanging out. It's two girls. She's spray tanning me. We know what we're here for. I'm not trying to impress anyone. I'm a prude. I'm like, also, I'm like, this girl's had a day. She doesn't need to see my labia. I mean, I do think when they're like, turn around and bend, I'm like, this is a little uncomfy. Also, it's like you just met them. I'm like, let's go to first base first. Like, second base. Maybe like over time, I'll be like, I'm ready to take my underwear off. It doesn't even cross my mind. I'm like, yeah. When you go to a massage, do you take it off? No. Well, no. No. Some people do. Take their underwear off during a massage? Yeah, because they're like, I don't want to wear it. I don't want to wear it. Yeah, because they're like, I don't want to wedgie when they're like, doing it. Oh, but you have a thong. No, because they're put, there's no way people. Are you wearing a thong in a massage? Yeah. Because you're, sometimes you have to take one leg out. So how are they doing no underwear? Well, then they put, they put. And I do like a guy masseuse. Sue me. But their hands are bigger. And I dare I say they are stronger. Don't come for me. I do prefer a male masseuse. It depends. I want to. Gay male masseuse. I don't care because the first time I ever had a guy masseuse, I literally. stopped and i was like wait it's so much better when your whole hand is on my whole neck like it feels different honestly okay you know what i'm trying to say every female masseuse list also saying female this just turned into a red pill podcast but every woman masseuse is listening they've trained their whole lives with art form and you're like i want a man i know i think i'm part of the problem i get it some look i think it's some men are good some men are bad i don't want them to be good looking because i don't want to feel like i'm like on a date no absolutely not well i've never like looked at them if you're gonna be good looking be like really good looking where i'm like okay this is fun but if they're like just like normal good looking i'm like i don't want it i have to think there are any women out here getting like happy endings at a massage yeah like where do you think it's like really upscale places that you would like never think or do you think it's like country clubs i always think it's country clubs women are doing it and i need them to start i need like a secret anonymous board where they're writing where they're doing it because they just want to know what's the what's the vibe wait i never told you this story but i went to a place that was um cd once because you know me i'm getting a yeah you'll go anywhere i'm getting a groupon a foot massage fifteen dollars hell yeah you're there at one point in the beginning of the massage because in my head in the back of my head i'm like is this a place where like a rub and tug i don't know yeah and at one point in the beginning she says your body's really sexy so the entire massage i can't relax i can't relax because i'm like she's gonna give me a happy ending the entire time i'm every time she tells me to do something i'm like and that's when they stick it in like the whole time i'm in my head like i can't enjoy it at all i'm freaking out because you know i'm a prude so i'm freaking out and then no i would have left i would have been freaking out but then at the end she's like thank you and then i'm like emma the creep maybe she didn't say sexy maybe she said sexy i think i don't know what happened but i think i was like sweating at one point she's like get out like i was so scared but isn't it funny if like she never was gonna do it and the whole time i thought she was my god but then part of me then like it's a full hour so then quarter through a quarter way through i was like i could do this like just do it do it for the story people's don't talk about these enough like they're out there they exist like there's definitely like five oh a street over in new york city like i do feel like the men are doing it the girls should be doing it it's just like harder for women because you have to like mentally be present but this is the thing you get to no you get to have a happy ending you get to yeah i think in like hopefully in like 20 years the way you go to get a facial you can just go and get a couple orgasms no i don't want to do that and that's your your catholic guilt i feel is that it's yeah yeah yeah i think that's bad that's naughty no it's not if people orgasm more they'd be i literally was googling i'm like has leila from mormon wives had an orgasm yet because it's been three seasons has she no she's kids apparently she has oh she has i do think like everyone's giggling about it and i'm like this isn't funny but it's not a joke no it's not funny no it's not funny it's actually not funny because she's funny at all she has two kids she's two kids she's been married before multiple times and not one man has given her an orgasm and they were joking like take this toy home and she's like i'm like no take the toy home and figure it out also her exes must be so embarrassed i'm upset like if i'm any of her ex-boyfriends i'm changing my name literally has orgasmed and she just loves making all their exes look bad like she brings a guy on and she's like couldn't orgasm with him that's the bad that i love that i love being obsessed with the show like 10 years after everyone's i was just gonna say it hasn't been on season one hasn't been on in four years and when you brought it up for the first time i was like oh my god i don't care about this show but she's asking her family if she could do like a sex toy um promo yes early on in my career i did a lot of sex toy promos because sexual wellness is important it's part of the patriarchy to tell us that we shouldn't know our bodies and understand our bodies and that's sexual wellness and actually you live longer when you have more orgasm so anyway i digress i mean grace just like to each other like you were gonna start yelling out by the way do you know that there's n nicks nyx makeup came out with a butt mask like for your butt like it covers your butt cheek and it like helps whatever women like exfoliated or i don't know but like the girls are excited about it like a brightening mask for your butt yeah like not like a bleach like a turmeric mask turmeric yeah turmeric like a turmeric a turmeric mask like tumor it's like orange it's actually like that color oh wait say turmeric again tumeric tumeric tumeric tumeric tumeric and i will beat you we go we're like a hockey game where when it gets we start fighting we then go just let him fight it out yeah like you've never hit your brother before or like your little cousin or like you know because he was younger than me so it was like i would get in trouble if i hit him i think when i was like really little i'd probably hit him like i would hit him like i would hit him like i would hit him hit him smacked him around a bit i remember once i squeezed his head because i couldn't hit him so i just squeezed his head i feel like the last time i like really hit someone was my brother and i feel like i was if i had an older brother i would beat the shit out of him yeah yeah people always talk about like sisters how they fight like okay i was still fighting too at home i just like mine was way less fair yeah like i also feel like playing sports i was like hitting tennis balls every day like i played basketball where i was like you were getting your aggression out yeah like i that's how i i had to run hide hit stop drop and roll and then make sure i had a clear exit plan because then i would be fucked if i was planning an execution i had to also have an exit route well shout out to stewart bulletin my favorite joke she does is if you hit if don't trust guys with sisters because it means they can hit they hit women very easily like i would they've hit a like run unplug like any type of gaming device and then run away can my ass oh my god that's iconic though because he'll never recover that game yeah because you're just and then you run this would be quick action i hope taylor swift does that to travis kelsey every now and then wait msg yeah is that if that's not real it's real i don't think so i have sources okay let's take a bet right now i think that that is gonna end up being like a crazy rumor you think that that's 100 true yeah where in msg great question i mean they're inviting like everyone they've ever met she's going hard but you know what good for her like she wants a wedding she wants a moment logistically though she does the heiress tour this is nothing for her no but i'm saying like logistically is it she's walking down everyone's in the why is it giving joel olstein yeah i'm like where are they all sitting in the everyone's gonna be on the floor she's walking down the aisle or is she coming out from like okay these are really good questions actually because how are they decorating msg also is there part of people that like are just in the stands watching and then there's people that are actually in like are they gonna take down the jerseys because like aesthetic are they gonna put it in the ice i don't think it's true there's no way i think that's so crazy unless she's pulling a fast one i think it's true unless she's pulling a fast one i think it's true unless she's pulling a fast one i think it's like a big hoax and she wants people to be distracted and she's just going to be like in a backyard in rhode island that's what i think i think it's going to be at like a very beautiful estate that's like a couple hundred people because that's what you want because that's what i think i should have just something low-key but so chic you die are you still into it 200 of my closest friends are you still in italy having a wedding in italy yeah no because you want to know what i've heard from you from like a lot of girlfriends who have gotten married they're like you have to have a an italian wedding planner oh that's where you put the foot down that's her i'm actually because you're like the whole time they'll be like well they'll do nothing they'll be in lunch they'll be eating lunch they'll do nothing they'll be like actually we're off this week so that's crazy um so you can't trust them yeah they randomly go to church during like they'd be like it's fine you don't need chairs for everyone they'll just pray to saint anthony for everything and they'll be like no you actually have to call someone yeah by the way our duncan refreshers are so so good i got the mako pineapple obviously with green tea and i got strawberry dragon fruit wait did you also see how the videos about the fifa players being like wait the american heat is like so insane like they're so hot here really because europe is super hot right and they and we have air conditioning i think they just don't want to go to new jersey wow they're making a lot of things in there making up excuses i am so confused why it is in new jersey though i just think that's like so dumb they do a lot of sporting events in new jersey yeah but this is like so many fucking people this is like so many more people i've never seen you more passionate about something well because where are all these people gonna go to sleep tonight no because the traffic in new york city is gonna be so insane well it's like they're doing the olympics in la why i hate these big group sporting events i know like i guess they get to though yeah they get to they get to um you guys lastly we got to number one on hulu because of the gigglers hell yeah because of the fucking gigglers i live for the gigglers i die by the gigglers i do everything for the gigglers do you feel like relieved now i i feel just so happy that i can put out something and people will watch it that's yes that no but as an artist you get to yeah you get to wait i didn't even mean to say it you get to put out art like so many people put out art and they want people to see it but no one sees it the fact that like i have people excited to watch it and enjoy it makes me want to cry that is so sweet thank you so anyone if you guys enjoyed it stream it again today tell one person a friend of me an enemy an um a lover wait imagine texting just randomly texting your ex being like hey you should watch and don't be specific i want to do i'm gonna do that that'll be great he'll learn something he'll learn something for sure um so i love you guys so much for supporting our art um and we'll talk to you later thank you duncan for partnering with us for this episode so good honestly i was falling asleep refreshers you We'll see you next time.