Giggling about con men, country boys, and cigars

(upbeat music) - Sup, Giggler? - Gary, fix your Wi-Fi. - Man, if I said shit, we can't be managed. (laughing) - I'm in the day just got away from me. What's up, my Giggler, Giggler, Giggler, Gigglers? - Yeah. - So someone messaged me and said, I was listening to Paige tell a story about how her ears were ringing. I just wanted to let her know that actually could be a health concern. (laughing) It doesn't always mean people are talking bad about you. (laughing) - Tell my mom not. (laughing) - I go not in Italian. - Not in Italian. I also want to apologize to the community for saying that Mormon house, Mormon secret wives was better than Vanderpump rules. I was just having a moment of excitement and I apologize, that wasn't true. - Well, everyone's entitled to their own opinions. And if you feel like you had a better time watching that over the past couple of weeks, that's okay. - Thank you for validating my feelings. Also, just want to start out with our woman of STEM of the week up top. There's a woman who does Uber Eats deliveries and she realizes that when she takes a picture of the food and she puts her feet in them, she gets bigger tips. So that is our woman of STEM of the week. - I can't believe you just said that because I have what pissed me off this week. - What is it? - You know how Uber launched? They're like, oh, you can request your woman to drive you. Amazing, I'd love that, what a great feature. Awesome. When I have really heavy bags, though, I'm not putting that on the girls. Anyway, I digress. Also, women can work for sex traffickers. So you're not fooling me, honey. You're actually not fooling me. Where Uber has messed up with this is when I'm doing an Uber Eats grocery order, why can't I pick a woman? And I don't know if this is what Darwin had in mind when he discovered natural selection, but Uber Eats delivery drivers, who are men? Who go into the grocery store? Are you alive? Are you alive? Because whenever I'm doing a grocery order from Uber Eats, it's because, oh, I need like two things that I forgot that I'm not going to the store by myself, or I need something really heavy, like 24 case of water bottles. So I'm going to Uber Eats that and add a couple other things. When I have a woman, I actually messaged my woman the other day and I said, I'm so thankful that you are a woman because I've been trying to get garlic now for 48 hours. (laughing) Okay, don't tell me that they're out of garlic and then send me a picture of a plastic bag with a million garlic cloves unshelled. And I want them in their home. I want them as God intended them at my door, okay? Did they give you the minced cut up ones? No, they sent me like a bag of, like, I was like, no, I don't want a bag of garlic that someone in the back room like unpeeled all of them. I wanted in a home, I know it's there, I know it's there. The next morning I did the same order, she got it. So if you're really interested in women's rights, put the option on Uber Eats to get women also because let me tell you something, all the men aren't going to be on the work for Uber real soon. And that's just natural selection that has nothing to do with us. I distinctly remember my mom having fights with my dad 'cause she'd give him the list, did your mom have like a written list? She'd say, this is the list, this is all you have to do is get like the six things on this list. And he would come back, he'd lose the list, something happened where he couldn't find anything, he bought a complete wrong thing. And I just remember I'm like, this happens every time. A sentence that is burned in my brain is, where's the God damn list? And that's from my dad, that's a direct quote from my dad. Gary should experience the sorrows. And there are so many times that he's come home and my mom has been like, okay, but this isn't what? And he's like, they didn't have it, they didn't have it, Kim. And she's like, don't make me go over there as I will. And she's like, I know that they did. I know they did, I know they did. My dad also would on the list of things we need, he would like write jokes at the bottom, like he'd write a backhand. That's sweet. Yeah, so like he'd have his little jokes, but my mom was like, it's not, and it isn't funny. It's not funny. That is a good game show though. Like dads trying to remember their children's birthdays. Yeah. And what is it where like, like my dad, the other day? It's weaponized in competence. Period. But my dad the other day, he like wasn't answering his phone. And I was like, oh, silly dad. Where like my mom doesn't answer. I'm like, so she's dead, she's dead somewhere. She went to a doctor's appointment. She didn't tell me about it. Now she's dead on the table. Like I got my dad. I'm like, he left his phone in the car. He stares at me. No, I was like, my dad forgot how his phone works. That's okay. Meanwhile, when my mom, when she answers on the first ring, that's what you love is. Do you ever call your mom and your dad answers? And you're like, I'm calling for a reason. Like, can you get it? Like sometimes I almost feel bad because I'm like, oh. There's nothing for you. Yeah, I'm like, I actually called for a mom. What's the TikTok? This is my house. It's Pam. I don't know that one. I'm the owner of this house. Oh, yeah. No, my dad's answered before. And she's like when she's in the shower. And I'm like, I'll call back. Thank you. Also, last night, the last cultureista's words aired. Wait, can I give some tea? So this is so funny. We get in and they put us in, like, these seats. They put us in the front, right? Yeah. Thank you, Bowen and Matt, treating us. They put us right in the front. I'm so excited. I'm sitting there all titillated. I love watching other people perform. And the camera guy comes-- I love watching other people perform. So this camera guy comes and he just looks at us and he goes, you guys saw my house? And you didn't hear him say this. He just asked me because I was on the corner. And I look at him and I go, now he walks away. It comes back. He goes, you guys are supposed to be summer house. And I go, yeah, that's true. Well, Sarah was sitting right behind us. So I go, I mean, I think they're going to be summer house. And he goes, no, you all are supposed to be summer house. I go, OK, I got fired. I looked at him, I got fired. He goes, hold on, he's like, he walks back home. He goes, are you sure you're not summer house? I'm like, it's complicated. It's the whole thing. I'm just not aligning myself right now with them. I go, it's just not really my brand. I know that I'm back on Bravo today. But overall, I just don't-- I was like, we're going live in three minutes. What the fuck are you talking about? And I was like, there was like a lot that went on that, like, it's been like six years, like, I'm not on summer house. You're like, it's actually super nuanced. And like, I couldn't explain it to you. But like, I'm not sure we have the time. And some people know me from summer house, and people know I forget the spot. And I also do this, like, hand on the street things sometimes on TikTok that people-- Do you have a hulu account? [LAUGHTER] I go, honestly, I started doing sets at the stand. And like, I really started to find my comedic voice on stage. Like, literally, it was so fucking-- Like, because I was like, could not get myself to be like, yeah, I'm part of summer house. It felt like vitriol to be like-- Get your-- Yeah, it's like, no. Like, I actually-- I was like, go back to your team, explain the nuances, and let's not label people. I wrote, I wrote down Mandy Moore because-- Oh my god, we walked by her. She performed, and with Bowen and Matt. And I just feel like, as a society, as a whole, as a collective, especially as millennials, I feel like we're not putting enough on us on Mandy Moore's career, and how much she impacted our lives. Like, Mandy Moore actually was the first pop star I knew of, like, before Britney and Christina, like, really, came into my world. I was a Mandy Moore girl. Really? Well, I feel like-- now, this was a long time ago. So if I get this not fully correct, don't at me. But-- [LAUGHTER] You know what's really funny to think about? Like, our mom's saying, like, Gen Z jargon in everyday life. Like, imagine if you just heard Menorby, like, and don't at me. But we can finish this sentence. She actually does, because she listens to "Giggly Squad" so much. Lately, she was like, I was so page-coated. [LAUGHTER] But I feel like it was a timing thing where there were too many girls of similar fonts. Like, there were too many blondes. I'm so real with you. They were, like, either go brunette, or we don't have space for you here. Like, they had-- Because they had Jessica Simpson. All right. They had Christina, and they had Britney. And Mandy Moore was, like, as good-- like, I loved Mandy Moore, but it seemed, like, the timing was wrong. She should have died her hair red. With name, a red-headed pop star, vitamin C. We didn't have a red-headed pop star. We still don't really have-- we have travel room. But I don't even see her as, like, a pop star. No, no. Also, our generation, we had a ton of pop stars. Like, the past 10, 15 years, who were their pop stars? Are they other Swift? Ariana. Yeah, but Ariana wasn't doing tours, like, Britney and Christina were doing, and Destiny's Child. doing tours. You are so nostalgic, wait I'm charging my computer. You literally just want to talk about your childhood. I just love our era of pop stars and the girls. I did just post Eve the rapper EV on my Instagram. I just love finding old songs that were so fucking good. That was from 2001. Besides 9/11 that was an amazing year. I love that you had no reaction to that. I just heard you say 9/11 and I thought that's just switch the topic. Wait, speaking of 9/11, did you see that's a nix parade like downtown, this was downtown this morning? I hate to be, I don't want to be negative. I don't. I don't want my like initial thoughts on things to be negative. I want to be a positive person. But when I saw the parade on TV and I saw that it's, I think one of the news reporters said like there's three million people down here. My first thought was why in the fuck will also you know how I feel about parades? Yeah. I don't think they're, I don't think they're appropriates. But this thing, these people are not like us and I admire them so much to be like they want to add a life experience to their life and have a core memory. No one's got to be anywhere on a Thursday at 10 a.m. Come on. I was like, and then I'm looking, I'm looking and obviously the majority are men and I'm like, oh no, like the loneliness epidemic, how will you guys survive? Also, the smoking of cigars is so funny to me. Like, imagine if like the woman's town is player who won the US Open's just smoking a cigar on, like it's crazy. I've never been around a man smoking a cigar until Joe. It's a culture. It's a culture. It's a whole thing, it's a whole world that I had no idea about. Men are spending their money on on specific weird shit. Like watches, cigars. I've also never really been around someone that golfed as much as your golf. How do you feel? Because does is a golfer. I always say before you have a family. It's quite nice. Here's my thing with golf. And this is like so candid. I almost like want to whisper. Just whisper. Just say it. Here's the thing. I don't care when you're golfing. I don't care. I don't have kids. So I don't have to go as hard. So you do and go wherever you want to because I certainly will as well. That's not where my problem lies. My problem lies is when you come home, I don't need to talk about it. I don't need to know how everyone else did. I don't need literally Joe texted me the other day. He was like, I'm playing really bad. I texted him back and I go, Kim, there are people that are dying. Kim your sister's going to jail. I think I'm like stop taking selfies of yourself. I don't care. So that's where and I didn't realize that's what the girls were dealing with. I thought that they were like the majority mad that they were leaving at times or it was like I planned something for a Saturday afternoon. I didn't realize the other part of it was that you have to talk then talk about it. Well, sometimes they for fun like bet money. And I know like doesn't his friends just for fun will like put five bucks in or whatever. So come home. He'll be like babe, I made $30 today. And I'm like, I'm what? I'm so wet from this. I feel like you liking sports. If someone came home and was like great golf story today, you would be like, okay, I'll listen. The thing also with does is he does wake up really early. Like he starts golfing at 7 a.m. So by the time he gets home at like 11, I already just had my coffee. I'm like excited to see him. Okay. But some men will just like be gone the entire day. I just wonder like because I know the men aren't talking about anything interesting. So I'm like, how are you guys not getting bored? Also, I went to Shinnecock, which is the practice for the US Open Men's. So what's so interesting about golfers as a sports podcast, you can't tell who the professional athletes are versus like the coaches, the managers, the agents walking around because it was like a practice because they all have the same body type. Like you know what, like the basketball team comes in. Everyone's like, they're the basketball players. No one knew who the golfers were. It was just a bunch of dudes with pants and colored shirts. And some of the agents were more fit than the golfers. And I was confused. Hannah, that is so funny. I kept like smiling at everyone than I was like, who's who? So do golfers? Are they like not working out? They don't have to, like they can have guts because they kind of just need power. Yeah. And like they're not burning a whole lot of calories, just swinging and then getting in a, but then some of them work out a lot and then some of them get injured because they worked out too much. Interesting. Like they got too jacked. Yeah, they just have to really like hit it hard. Also, I don't care. I was like, we've been talking about this way too long. Also, I don't give a fuck about these guys. I also do think that if you wanted to, you'd be so good at golf because you have a wingspan of like, if I wanted to, I could, but if you wanted to, you could wait. One more thing about less cultureistas. Yeah. One of the more embarrassing things happened to me. Instagram, like the day before, I see a message from Matt Bowen and you in a group chat. Yeah. And Matt said something funny that made us laugh. And then I scroll up and I realized like I'd missed all of it. So then I'm like, oh my god, I'm so sorry. I missed like the previous conversation. Then I realized he had added me to an old conversation that you guys had had from when you won Cool Girl of the year, the previous year. So then I, and I'm like honestly like, I know them, but I don't know them enough to be like so stupid over DMs. Yeah. So then I had to be, and I can't unsund it. No one's on SNL, I have respect. I'm not. So then I'm like over explaining what that I'm, then I'm like, I'm a fucking idiot. I'm so sorry. I'll see you guys there and don't tell them, don't tell the camera guy that I was the one. That guy's only job was to record me, you and Sierra. And I was literally being like, you're in the wrong place, bro. Also, at one point, Sierra took my scarf almost suffocated at the end of the show. And then started, started like swinging it. The scarf was actually dangerous at some point. It was. It was a health hazard at some point. Yeah. My thing, when you came and told me that, like, oh, they added me to your original group chat. So I could see the previous messages. The first thing I thought was, what is any girl in high school doing? Like, could you imagine being in high school, you're deeming with your friend, you're talking shit about someone, then you guys get into a fight. They add the third girl in. She sees everything you guys have said. I'm like, no, I just say a lot people know because while I scrolled up and it was literally Matt being like, thank you so much for coming. And I, and I only you responded. And I was like, oh my god, how did I ignore that? And then it was just me being like, sorry, I don't, I didn't know what's going on. Yeah, that's a crazy feature. And I didn't know they have that. So Hannah talked about it. Honestly, DMs are like, I don't even know what's going on with DMs. I still don't know if people can see if I read their DMs or not. My Instagram has a lot of bugs. So like, I don't really know what's going on. I can't see any of my mentions. If I click a DM and then I click off of it, it's, it's gone forever. So I've been like, I've like tried to respond to people and then it's gone. So whatever. Who cares? I canceled my Botox appointment for next Friday because my mom keeps sending me videos about how it goes right into your brain. She said, you want to numb your brain? Wait, I'm upset. She's like, there's one of those like eating things that eat your brain and a meba and a meba. There's a meba toxins. Also, do you know the difference between this sport Botox set of set of fill? The way I think about it is they all sound like aliens. This is the way I think about it. You know, a band-aid. Yeah. The brand is band-aid. Got it. That's not a band-aid. Botox is the brand. But there's other ones that do all do the same thing, but they're not called Botox. Botox just has the most the best PR. I also could have just made that up, but I'm pretty sure that's how it is. So no, I actually don't know the difference between Botox and Disport. I know that if you metabolize one or the other faster, they give you the other one. Do you think your Botox has worn off yet? Not fully. From your lip. Not fully. How did affect your mental health? It affected my mental health in multiple ways, because I waited so long to do it, and then I felt like I went against myself, because I was like, you went against your own gut, because you felt peer pressured from your own self. And then I hated when people would already comment, like, oh my god, she's gotten so much worked on. So then after I got Botox, they were like, well, I know for a fact she gets Botox. I'm like, I haven't had you bitches wish I had a surgery on my face. You bitches wish I I had a nose job, but so that like pissed me off. - I did post a photo. I think of when I was little and someone's like, I knew you got filler. I was like, I'm an infant in that photo. (laughing) (laughing) - A literal look. - Oh, a child. - They were like, look what my lips are. I'm like, I'm just, I'm two weeks old. (laughing) Wait, did you watch maternal instinct? Now, let me do a warning, I'm not gonna say what happened. - Okay. - This first episode, I'm not gonna spoil it, and I will give you guys time until Monday to watch it, but then I'm spoiling it, 'cause we have to talk about what happens. - Wait, there's more than one episode? - No, there's one. - One, one. Okay, yeah, this is like an hour and a half. - I don't wanna give the ending away. - Okay. - Yeah, because this is a big one. - This is the kind of thing where you're like, yeah, this is fucking crazy and then it ends and you're like, (laughing) - But you're just like, it's starting and you're like, okay, like, yeah, crazy. And then you're like, she's not gonna. There's no way she-- - There's, she's not great. Also, like, part of me was like, how did we go from A to Z? (laughing) Like, there was no reason for it to end the way it did. Like, there's so many levels of crazy. And like, one thing about me, I hate calling a woman crazy. - Mm-hmm. - This one. - This crazy. - Well, here's why I think it's so scary when women do evil things. 'Cause they're smart, because they're so smart. So like, if you have a girl who legitimately hates your stinkin' guts or like wants to wish harm on you, that's one of the scariest things in the world. I'd pick a man over a girl who hates me. - That's why I primarily fight with men. 'Cause knowing a girl hates you, you literally are like, she could be 10 steps ahead. Like, she, she, I'm walking into what she wants me to do right now. Like, who knows? - No, they're terrifying. Dude, I just saw a news article in that like, two girls, I think it was like downtown. It was either downtown New York or like, or like over in right in Jersey City. And it was like, two girls got acid thrown on them. - What? - Yeah, just like walking down the street that it was like a targeted attack. It was like a guy. It was two people on a mo-ped. They don't know if it was girls or guys. Like, that is, can you stop scaring people? - All right, people are scaring everyone. - It's Friday, everyone. - To be alert, you have to be alert. - Well, we've become Italian moms. She's like, once a girl was just, just like you, walking down the street. - So, yeah, I know, hit her in the head. - No, people can get so jealous of you that rather than trying to kill you, they just wanna like destroy your life. It's very scary anyway. - One thing that made me feel good about my enemies was I was getting, you know, I was getting those quotes. And how like your enemies believe in you more than you believe in yourself. - Yeah. - And I was kind of like, holy shit, you're my cheerleader, you're my everything, you're my doctor, you're my engineer, you're my Jalen Brunson. - Yeah, but you have like normal enemies. I have enemies that are like, I'll find where you live. (laughing) - And I'll find where your cousins live. - Wait, I love it. We're debating who has worse enemies. (laughing) - Oh, a kitty just jumped up. Oh, hi, kitty. I found out because I'm a Scorpio rising, someone was like, hey, Scorpio rising, people are gonna really fucking hate you. Like, groups of people are gonna come together and be like, I don't fuck with her, and they're not gonna like you. And you either have to accept it and move on, or your life's gonna be living hell. And I was like, cool, cool, cool. Cool, glad I saw this TikTok. - And because you're a Leo, you like-- - I can't hide. - Yeah, and like, people just gravitate toward you. - Yeah, we have different types of enemies, and we trigger different things in people. - Yes. - And that's what we're best friends. - Yeah. - Wait, okay, so back to this documentary. - Oh yeah, do you wanna explain or do you want me to start? - The one thing I wanna say about it, and this is why I think that gossip is so important. - Oh, yes. They were in the smallest town in America, and a bunch of people knew this bitch was nuts, and no one said anything because they did not want to get involved in gossip or drama, but it is so important to talk to your friends, and be like, no, this is what I heard, and that bitch is nuts. - I do think it's a red flag when you meet some of them, someone, and they immediately start demonizing someone, whether it's a guy demonizing an ex or someone demonizing a friend, granted there are obviously bad people, but when someone goes too hard, I don't like that. - It should be more like, yeah, I don't fuck with her, but whatever, I wish her well instead of this, okay. So this girl, she's beautiful, she comes, she's in the town, and she meets poor Wade, poor Wade. He just likes the farm, he stays busy all day. - He's got red hair, and he's sweet. - And he's chunky, and he's cute. - He just wants to do country stuff, and his friend, what about his friend, I was like, I don't care what no other folks do. I loved that so much. I was like, I don't care what other folks do. - No, those are kinda like, he was like, I will get the gossip, but I just live my life, and I don't care what's going on. But then you know, he sat there at the end and was like, damn, I should've asked one question. I should've asked two questions, maybe. Oh damn, so anyway, he has pigs, he has a farm, and he's just like, I'm a hard work in country. I love when people from the country, and people make fun of New Yorkers, we went home from New York, which is so valid, but like, country people are like, do you like a country song? 'Cause that's all I'm looking for in a girl. Would you listen to a country song, what me, and just sit out by the country and talk about the country, and talk about how those city folks are so weird, but we got the country, we got sunsets, and trees. So anyway, the ways of doing this thing, she comes into his life, she loves, they like, it's quick, quick. And she immediately is like, I have a lot of money, but I can't get it because of my trust. Which, if I had a nickel. - It's like, I have a hand. (laughing) - It's like, I had a nickel. - Do you remember there was a man in our life that was like, I can't get a tattoo or I won't get my trust? I mean, we were like, that makes sense. So she's a combination of a lot of mental illnesses. First, she's full, it's very con man things, and I do have to say I'm kind of obsessed with con men. I'm kind of obsessed because everyone else has to live with reality, and they're like, I won't, I'm just not. And when you believe it yourself, that shit's real for you. - And that's why you don't align with summer house. (laughing) - And that's why I told the cameraman to step back. (laughing) - No, I love people that don't live in reality. I'm like, so she basically is like, I'm loaded and I'm getting you a truck 'cause I love you. So if you know a country man, there's nothing they love more than a truck. - Yeah. - I told you once I met these country guys, and they were like, we're gonna come pick you up on our truck, and I was like, a hub truck? Like, I never know what a truck, I was like, I'm from New York. Like, you mean like a moving truck? Like, what do you talk about a truck? Just say SUV, anyway. So he gets his big truck, and then she wants to be sweet with the mom, so she somehow buys the mom. This like, really nice car. Now the mom, 'cause she's a woman, is like, let's look into this a little, 'cause this is kind of strange that this girl's like a month in, buying everyone things. And they're like, no one paid for that car, and we have to take it back. - Yeah, got repossessed within like three weeks. - You know what it is also with Conman? They go so crazy that it's like so unrealistic that you can't wrap your head around it, 'cause then she goes, I wanna buy this like, $20 million acre farm. - $4 million. - And she sits the whole family down to like, present it to them that she's gonna-- - On Christmas. - On Christmas, and they have footage. That's why documentaries are so good nowadays. They have footage of everything. - That's why Ben Stiller was like at the game with his sideways camera and just getting footage. - I wouldn't have been surprised Ben Stiller was at their Christmas holding his horse on a phone. - We're about to make history. And she's like, I found this farm and we're gonna live. And everyone's kinda like, okay, go off. Like, we're proud of you guys. - How do we ever bend to Oklahoma? - We've been to Oklahoma City. - Okay, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. - Which is Oklahoma. But Kansas City's not in Kansas. It's in Missouri. - I digress. - Yeah, and you know what? - And you know what? - And you know what, whoever was going through something on that day that I got named. - They go, you know how we're gonna confuse those New Yorkers, those dumb New Yorkers. We're gonna call Kansas in Missouri. Now we're a throne, they'll never find us. So then she's like, I don't fuck with my mom. Which, look, there are people who have bad relationships with their mom totally fine. But she's like, my mom's trying to steal my trust. My mom is the worst person in the world. My mom's evil. And the mom's nowhere to be found. And any event the mom's not invited. I thought we were gonna see the mom at some point. Well, finally someone contacts the mom. And the mom is basically like, but just crazily. - Yeah. - She's like, but I can't say anything 'cause then I won't be able to see my granddaughter. - Which made so much sense. - Then we find out she has these other former friends. Do you wanna tell them about the former friends? - No, you can keep going. - Okay. - So they're these former friends. And they, 'cause you were on your phone the whole time. (laughing) - 'Cause I don't quite remember how they knew the former friends. - Yeah, they were just like friends and one of them gets pregnant. And she became obsessed with her pregnancy. - Yes, and she was just like, she was being so weird. I had to distance myself. Which, look, I know on this podcast, [BLANK_AUDIO] all about like pointing out the things that men do and we're like always all for the girls. But if you get a gut feeling about a girl, that is not being, not a girl's girl, that is not being like a mean girl. If you get a gut feeling about someone, nine times out of 10, it is right. - And she basically was like, "She was being so fucking weird about my pregnancy." And then she started working for a company and her boss had a daughter who passed away. She tells the boss I had a daughter who passed away and they like bond over it. The boss somehow finds out she's lying about it, also finds out she's never done a slick of work since she's been there. Like she's just fucking around, not doing calls, not doing meetings. But I guess she's very mad at you. - Which isn't illegal. - It's not illegal. And also I'm like, "Go for her." - That's not the bad thing here. (laughing) - And that's how much she's a bad person. (laughing) - Wait, Hannah and I were on a Zoom. - I can't go on Zoom with you anymore. Like we actually-- - No, I actually, that was my worst one. That was my worst one. - I have to pull up your hands. - Tags to Hannah and I go, I literally don't know what's going on in this Zoom. And then I said something during the Zoom and then I realized that everyone knew I didn't know what was going on because they laughed at me. I said, and all I said was, "I'm so excited." And they go, "They're so onto you." Like 'cause all of a sudden you go, "I love school." Like you said something crazy. You were like, and I said, "I'm so excited too." And they go, "Okay." - Okay, I have an earnest question to ask you. Could you tell that I was online shopping during it? - No, I thought you were gonna text me back, but you didn't. So like I saw you looking at something and I was like, "Oh, obviously something's more important." But I didn't obviously didn't know you were online shopping. - But yeah, you were like, I actually have no idea where it was going on. Also you're like obsessed with sending me invisible text messages, which is like actually giving me a next level adrenaline hit. Like now when I see one coming in, I'm like, "Oh, oh, oh, oh." Like I freak out. So you have certain front groups in your life that really give actually shout out to all the front groups that are out here doing the work so that like when you're in your like peaceful era, you can just like, "I have a friend." Her name's Ali. (laughing) - And everyone, and sometimes me and Hannah will be on the phone and I'll say to Hannah, we're so vibing and we're so content and we're like, wow, we're really like working so hard in our lives and like I just like feel real peace right now. And I'll say, "Why don't you text Ali?" - See if she's got a little something for us. - Ali keeps me fed like to the point that she'll tell me something like really upsettingly crazy and I just go, I just want you to know, thank you. Thank you for making me feel alive in my heart and in this moment. So shout out to Ali for having fun 'cause like she's single. - Yeah, she's out there. - She's in the streets, but she's doing work. - She could have been the next parade today. Who knows, she's everywhere. - Actually, one of my girlfriends was at the next parade and she's my friend and I'm like, I'll text and be like, "What are your girlfriends fighting about?" - Well, I've actually tried to infiltrate her friend group too because she hangs out like with the next fans all the time. - Yeah. - Yeah. This pot is about us finding other people that have stuff going on and then spilling it on the pot. I'm like, "Guys, I know a girl." You're not gonna believe this. But anyway, so finally this girl tells Wade, a little country-bubb again, Wade, that she's pregnant. - Wait, I like don't hate the name Wade. - I don't hate it, but I don't love it. It's giving, it's giving like Mormon. It's giving like douchey Mormon, like the cool Mormon guy who like if he was in a normal city, everyone would be like, "Why is he talk like that?" But in Mormon town, they're like, "It's Wade!" And he's like, "What's up, guys?" - Yeah, he's like Quirky and he's fun. - Yeah. - He's got like a really good personality, but he's not the cutest, but his girlfriend's gorgeous. That's like Wade from Utah. - Yeah, yeah. Also, why is his name Dakota? Like, no one addresses it. The whole, no one's ever said, "Hey, how do we get here?" - Well, 'cause you're saying, 'cause you think that's a girl's name? - No, just 'cause I, like, that's the kind of thing you say, "Give me the backstory." - Yeah. Like, you don't just let someone say my name's Dakota and you go, "Oh, obviously." - No. - I need to be with you the next time you say to someone, and why don't you give me the backstory on that one? 'Cause there's gotta be something here. No one's just, no one's just at the hospital saying, "Honey, what about Dakota?" - Well, this is a thing about Dakota on Mormon housewives. Literally takes to the reunion for him to be like, by the way, I was on heroin for 10 years, and we're like, "We don't talk about that." I'm like, "This is a huge part of why he's brain dead." And no one talks about it. I'm like, "The guy has been struggling in active addiction." And everyone's just like, "Well, I think he's trying to survive." - Yeah, but he's also the worst. - And he's the worst, but anyway. So she says, "Wade, my country bump can wade. I'm pregnant." And he's like, "I didn't really want a daughter, but here we are, it's a, whatever." But then she starts doing the thing where she's like, "You can't come to this. You can't come to the doctor with me." She sends a ultrasound to someone that, and the date is 2016. And the lady, they just met this girl. So they're questioning everything. So they tell her, "Hey, why is this say 2016?" She immediately responds and is like, "Oh, there was a mistake at the hospital. This happens." - 'Cause it's like 2019, right? - I think it was after COVID. It was maybe, I don't know, but it was past 2016. So she's been a little sloppy. So people are kinda on to her. And then some photo, she looks pregnant. Some she doesn't. She does a whole photo shoot with a fake belly. And the craziest thing about it is, Wade has never seen her stomach. He's like, "She doesn't let me touch her. She doesn't let me have sex with her." How was there not one moment in those nine months that he was like, "Can I see the baby's stomach?" - They didn't have sex for nine months. - Yeah, Wade's like, "She's not letting me touch her 'cause she's insecure, 'cause she's pregnant." And I respect her space. I'm like, "She's just eating a lot, she does." - At what point are you not having sex with your husband where like, then you're saying something? Like, how long are you going? - Before you're like, "Oh, we should talk about this." - Yeah. Nine months. - No, no, that's crazy. - That's crazy. - But Wade is busy on the farm. Wade's been on the farm and she's-- - I think I'm going a month tops. - Well, he said she would just like go in the bathroom and like put the shower on and then be like on her computer, like, making up lies. But also in the meantime, she had to make money. So what she did was she became a photographer. - And she became a wedding photographer. - Sometimes when you describe what happens in documentaries, I think, "Did I watch this?" (laughing) - That's like when Grace posts memes from the episode and literally you say things and like, I never heard her say that. - With the funniest line in the world, I'm like, "I wasn't there for that." I didn't even don't hear your come back. - If someone calls me after we record Gagley Squad and says like, "Oh, would you talk about on Gagley Squad?" I go, "I have no idea." - No, Grace is like, "What should we title this?" And I was like, "What?" - I don't remember one word that we said, like not one topic. So she does this, and she meets this family and she shoots their wedding. And it's, and I guess shortly thereafter, the bride gets pregnant and they like, stayed in touch a little bit. So she's pregnant. This one's saying she's pregnant. And then everyone who's doubting her pregnancy is like, "Okay, like, what is she gonna do?" It's like seven months, eight months. - We're nearing the due date. - Due date happens. And I think she was apparently googling, like, where to adopt a brand new baby. - Like, you could Uber eats one? - Literally, she was like, fresh baby near me. Like, and I guess she was trying to get, I don't know, but like, how do you go nine months without at least like having a plan of that? I don't know. But the crazy thing with this documentary is it starts with her in a car getting stopped by the cops saying, I just had a baby in my car. Now, I'm not gonna tell you guys any more information 'cause I don't wanna give it away, but shit gets really fucking crazy. - Yeah. - And I, you know, guys, no, I don't wanna drop an F bomb for no reason, that was worth it. - One thing I will say about the documentary, all the moms that are in it, that are like the talking heads that are like explaining the story to you, are all the most, like, when the girls were speaking, the women, I had to turn the TV up because everyone was so soft-spoken. Like Wade's mom, obsessed. I love Wade's mom. - And then Wade's mom. - And then Wade's mom's friend, who was like, something's going on here, I'm gonna figure it out. Imagine being soft-spoken. Maybe people would listen to me more. - Imagine not having the sound of your voice, just be nails on a chalkboard to some people. Like sometimes like, okay, sometimes like our clips on TikTok from the pod will be like posted by like some random count, like not us. It'll be like a random clip they took from the pod. And there will be a rogue comment, of someone who has no idea who we are. Just like horrible voices, how do you listen? Like, and I'm just like, valid. Like, I know what I feel like. - So voices, our voices aren't that bad. - No, but like, everybody hates their own voice. I feel like, so when you see a comment like her voice sucks, you're like, nine, like, okay. - That's why we change our voices sometimes. (laughs) - I also posted on my, I'm posting a start, posting on my Instagram stories more often, like the docs I'm watching, so people, 'cause people get annoyed when they're like, "Hana, we don't know what you're watching," and then you tell it. So I posted, also there's this, you, I don't know, you might like it. It's a model cult in New York City on HBO, and it was about like this guy who was an astrologist psychic, like former model who was obsessed with beautiful things and beautiful people, and he just wanted a cult of like, really beautiful people around him. So just like, that's just a pure motor. (laughs) - It's a club promoter, that's a literal club promoter. - He literally was a club promoter. - That's any guy you meet that's like, I work a nightlife. - Literally, and this guy becomes like, one of the biggest models in the world, and he gave all his money to him. That's what they get you with the cults, like somehow they convince everyone to give them their money. - So speaking of cult, are you done with secret lives of Mormon wives? - I have like six more episodes left right now. Oh my God, Taylor's like, just up with Dakota, and she's like, preparing for the Basharat. - Oh, I'm sorry that you're almost done. - But I didn't realize that whole season is so like, about leading up to the Basharat. - You felt more awful for her that they didn't err at, because watching her, him so strategically like, sleep with her before. - But that's the problem of getting in bed with someone, like if they're your actual op. - Yeah. - Like, they have everything on you, and they can use it against you. So it's like, do you want someone who protects you from your darkness, or brings it to the light? - Why did that become a spell? But I also realized these poor girls, they didn't get breaks from filming. - No, they went right into it. I was just gonna say that so they're not, they haven't filmed another season yet. - Well, I think for their sanity, that will be really good. But I really think like, that's why the seasons are so good, 'cause they didn't take breaks. So when you watch seasons of a TV show, and you're like, that was a different director on that one, or like, because it was all the same, like it all felt like every season was equal to me. - Well, now the love island is such a huge phenomenon, both in America, and there's franchises all over the world. It makes it annoying to watch reality TV months and months later, because of social media, so you know so much more, where it's like, okay, they have the capabilities of being able to watch it somewhat in real time, because I think Mormon wives tried to do it. They did it the closest I've seen in a while. Like they filmed, and then it was out, and you were like, that was really fast. - But I do have to say, competition shows, the storylines are easier. It's like, these people say, these people go, where these shows, they have to like, create narratives. I mean, we do know that they edit, as they see what the fandom says, like they change narratives. So like that is kind of doing it, but who these editors are like, it would be, I think it would make more shows real, because they couldn't go back and be like, let's actually not even include that in that episode, because that will make her point in a later episode valid, and we can't have that, that's crazy. - Why would we have that? - Also, one thing about Swig, if you guys don't know what Swig is, it's this like soda company, where they put milk and shit in it, and like syrup. - I never get that milk part of that, but anyway. - But my question is, how sweet is that? They're like, yeah, no, you would die. - Even when people put one vanilla thing in an espresso, or a latte, I'm like. - I feel like you, once last time, you had a sip of Coca-Cola. - Oh, I don't really dabble. - But you like a sepsky? - Yeah, well, I have a sip. - Yeah, but you're never like drinking a full, if you're getting a carbonated or like a soda, you're never drinking a full. - I don't think I ever drank a full Coke. - 'Cause my mom's a dietician, she was like, your teeth are gonna, oh my god, yeah. - That's not my vice. - That's why you don't break out. - Whitney and I did ketamine once. No, but, oh my god, I went, you know some coffee shops, the caffeine just hits differently. - Yeah. - I went to a coffee shop yesterday, and all I wanted to do was start my day, right? And I got two shots of espresso in a chilate. I was being a little crazy, but like. - That crazy for you. I know, but like nothing that should send me to the hospital. When I tell you, I was out of your skin. - I was laying in the bathroom. And a two shots of espresso is insane. - Paige, I got home. Like, I lying in the bathroom, butters looking at me, and I was like, I was like getting my face in order. - Are you sweating? - Sweating, shitting myself, getting up, dizzy, walking into walls, right? That was my whole morning. - When was this? - What time of day? - Like I battle things, and I sometimes don't, I can't keep up with everything. - 'Cause sometimes I want to protect you. - We want to know what, we talked a lot this week. - We did, and actually, but you've been good, 'cause we'll start really gabbing, and you go, we need to save for the pot, and we'll just hang up on each other. - No, we had, the other night, we had to hang up, because I could have kept going. - Yeah. Hot take, I actually am really liking dogs, right now that have like eyebrows. - Well, they have a story to tell. - They have a story to tell. - They could be the narrator of a hit Netflix show. You know, like they, they have an aesthetic. They have a vibe. - He's a depper man. - Yeah, like I love a dog with an accessory. - Yeah, like he literally got his brows done. - Like a golden retriever wearing a pair of goggles. - Yeah, I'm in. - And I'm not a monster. - Okay. I'm not a monster. - Am I taking a home with me? - A distinguished gentleman with his eyebrows, and then they look like they're judging you sometimes. They're like, oh, and I'm like, oh, I love that. - Yeah, like German shepherds have jobs. They work for the police. Like they pay taxes. - And they love working. Like they wake up and they like, let me work. Work cats are like, I don't know your name. I didn't sign up for this. Someone said, like literally, you never tell your cat what to do. And it's so true. - You know what's funny about having a cat is, I do feel like it is any pet really. It is like a little bit of a precursor to kids, not that it's comparable at all. But like I kind of imagine when you're trying to like reverse psychology a child, like when I want Kitty to stay in the room, like I have to reverse psychology her as if like, I'm not gonna shut the door. So I'm just gonna like walk over here and then she comes in and I'm like, gacha. And like I am shutting the doors you that you can't leave. There is a lot of, we're like with dogs, I feel like you can just be like, come, sit, shut up. - No, the second the cat knows you want them to come, they're like, suddenly I'm not in the mood. - Yeah, and I'm like, and then I'm looking around and then she's looking at the amount of times that me and Daphne are home alone looking around. Would it send you, that would be as strong as you can? - Well also because cats have like ways they do things like what she will as a routine. So like but it doesn't just sit on my shoulder. She does a whole like pretends like she's not going to, then she comes back in and then she. - They're performers. - Not that giggly squad is the culture. - However, there's a movie coming out of, it's basically like a cat godfather movie, like it's a cat mafia movie. And I was like, this could not be more giggly squad to go to, so much of cats in the mob. Did you see it? - Yeah, I almost felt like. - Give us a producer credit. - Literally, I go have a producer credit. I go and tell him that we are mafia cats. (laughing) Like I actually got like a little annoyed when I watched the trailer. I was like, okay, so, you've been listening to giggly squad. (laughing) Just say it. - They were like, what if we get a bunch of cute cats who were also Italian and want revenge on each other? - Yeah, I'm like, I'm like, wait, so the whole theme is revenge? - Okay. - Okay. - But also, I feel like I need to watch it. 'Cause that should have made me laugh. So anyway, final thought. - Yeah. - Big glasses, big sunglasses are back. I'm not happy 'cause I have a small head, even though my personality looks like I have a big head, I actually have a small head, not to brag, don't be jealous. But like, I can't pull off big glasses. I look like a mosquito. - You can, Hannah. - You can. - I like little country ones. - Really? Because I feel like you would love the big ones if you got a good pair of big ones, because you can hide your whole face with them. Like, no, it's so nice. Like in the morning when you're like, I'm walking to get my coffee and you're like, I'm not trying to interact with anyone. It's like, yeah, my glass is on. - You just feel like Paris Hilton after a night out, trying to get away from the paparazzi. - It's like what a mask was in 2020, but the other end of your face. It's just like, please, I can't right now. We can't speak. I have my big glasses on. - What glasses are you bringing to Italy? 'Cause I know you lost one of your glasses, and I wasn't gonna bring it up, and I held it for the whole pod. - I did lose a pair of my glasses, and I reordered them. They actually got delivered this morning. 'Cause I hate losing things. - Yeah. - I'm doing all my Italy packing next week. I can't even think of it. I can't. I can't talk about that. - I can't, I know I can't. - Well, we love you guys. Have the best weekend ever. Thanks for giggling with us, and we'll talk to you later. Bye. (upbeat music)