Ghostly Moments (Compilation)

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Potatoes of goblins. Two fables of specters. It's time for Ghostly Moments. Bob, do you have ghosts in front of you? In front of me? Is there a window in front of you or something? No. Are you referring to this? Yeah, I saw a shadowy figure. What is, what is going, it looks like a window and someone's walking by it. What is that? I'm in a basement. Let's be, let's be very clear about this. I'm in a basement. This is a TV that's off, that is reflective, but what it usually reflects is my monitors. And I just saw that. Yeah, you saw that too. Someone walked by. You can see my hand in the monitor, right? You could see like right here when I. Yeah, our angle, I can't, but I believe you. I swear something walked by. I saw that because you made me look at it right where that, it looked like. What is that? What is that? I saw it. What is it? I'm in a basement. You got ghosts, man. I'm in a basement. I'm in a basement. What's happening? My monitors are all static except for your images right now. Good luck putting that in a YouTube short editors. Man, Bob, if this is a prank, it's a good one. Dude, if this is a prank, I'm pranking my own self here too. What the fuck is happening? Hey, I'll give you 20 bucks to stand in front of this light while I'm recording an episode and just walk back and forth. I'm in a basement. There are like basement windows, but there's no way that they're reflect, that's what's reflecting because they're covered by horizontal slats. It keeps happening. Man, I didn't mean to derail your episode, but yeah. I have no fucking idea what that is. Well, what's reflecting right now in that top part? Like, what is that green line? I don't know. Watch right here, right? You can see my hand shadow right there. That's my hand in front of my monitors. What is up? Wait, I can obstruct that. Yeah. It's a, I don't have an explanation for that. I think there's someone hiding behind your monitor. I think that's the only thing. The only other thing in my office that emits light is I have a, over there up high, I have a computer, but it's purple. It's all purple lighting inside my computer. It's not green. All the listeners are shaking their steering wheel. Listeners, there's a TV that looks like someone's moving in front of a reflection in it. There you go. You're welcome. It honestly looks like someone is walking back and forth in front of the reflection. I'm alone in a basement. I don't know. I don't know what to tell you. Are you? Okay. I hope so. I don't know. Oh, they walked the other way. It did go the other way. I saw that. If a face appears and stays there, maybe we'll talk to it. Maybe that'll be the episode. I don't like that. I don't like that. Oh, this is not a big thing, but it's preparation. Okay. So the day the mountain swallowed, I want you all to close your eyes. Okay. Imagine, imagine, imagine, imagine, imagine, imagine. I went searching for the truth and like a fool, I found it. But some truths are best left undiscovered. Well, I turned around and there was, uh, it was bigger than I could have imagined. The hikers claimed that when they turned around, it seemed as though their friend had simply vanished. When I turned around, my whole farm was gone. I don't believe in ghosts. But when I turned around, I couldn't expect what I was seeing. This is Morbid Mysteries of the Missing Millennium. Viewer discretion is advised. If I swallow this right now and die, will you give me the point? That's worth at least two points, I guess. Yeah. Everyone pull over to the side of the road. You got to watch this one. I'm dead. That's two points to mark, I guess. Jesus, I'm getting railroaded here, man. Well, thankfully he can't compete for any more points now, right? If he comes back to life, he loses the game. Two points, just to be clear. Okay. Anyway, interesting discussion. I think. Hey, what's up, guys? Back from the afterlife here. Want to finish this episode out strong. I'm going to cross out dead and take those two points away real quick. Can I get one point? I'm a ghost, man. All right, I'll give you one ghost point. Okay, cool. You hear my echoey voice and everything? Editors. Editors, don't do any of this. Just make him live with what he's done. No, please. I sign your checks. That's not even true. None of us sign shit. You're right. But I can call the person who does. I know them, too. I have their number, too. I'll call them and tell them not to listen to Mark. You don't even worry about it. All right, fine. We have to talk about a very important topic. I want you to use science. I want you to use mysticism. I want you to use personal beliefs, regardless of facts shown to you. I want you to use whatever methods necessary for you to discuss the important topic of are ghosts real? No. Final answer. All right. Episode over. All right. Thank you, everybody. Mark wins because the answer is yes. Answered first. Thank you for listening to the podcast. Make sure that you watch it on Spotify. No. Well, so we can talk about this from several different perspectives. Thing number one that I have that I enjoy is ghost hunting both the TV shows that exist around ghost hunting and the actual devices that you use to go ghost hunting like EMF readers and talk boxes or whatever they're called and all the different little tools that you use to try and detect the presence of ghosts. All that stuff is very entertaining and hilarious. And bunk. Do you guys believe in any of that stuff that it works, that it means anything? No. Those shows? No. It is interesting that they would believe that it does because if you even if you watch this as a show, the EMF thing with like the radio where it cycles through and it grabs like there'll be like a word came through and I'm like, yeah, you're going through radio signal, the spirit box, the spirit box. EMF is the little light that like electromagnetic field detector. Yeah. But it's just so funny to me because it's like, yeah, this thing, what it does is it cycles. Through the radio frequencies that are passing through. Yeah. It picks up words that are broadcast into this realm. But what happens whenever you ask it a question like, what do you want? And you hear Apple. It's like, clearly the ghost wants an apple. And you hear my hips. And it's like, oh, Darren's Lauren. I heard that. I used to watch those ghost hunting shows quite a bit. They're very funny. They're so entertaining. They are edited in a way that just never gets to a conclusion. Ever. And it's like straight through the like it goes up to the commercial break. It does. It's not even a cliffhanger. It's just a constantly building like and then this happened. They circle back to the same clip of like a little dot going through with a circle on it. And then the circle is bigger and then it closer to the circle. And it's like I can stretch that out for 10 minutes. And the sound, dude, the sound stingers they use. Oh, my God. It's a black and white infrared shot of a door that's already open. That just goes. And then I saw that the door was open. Show the clip again. And I don't remember opening the door and they put in the squeak sound effect. Yeah, I love those shows like, oh, and it's like a Dane Cook joke to some of those who they'll they'll be in a room and they'll the door will move or whatever thing falls over and they're like, Gary, Gary was down stick. Gary, come up here. Gary's got the EMF. Gary, come up here a minute and a half ago. Did you get anything like? Well, yeah, no, I got like a three like a three out of five on this reader thing. Why? Did something happen up here? You got a three out of five. It's like they're all through the house and it's like I was I was in the basement using the dividing rods. You were in the upstairs with the dolls. I don't know why, because it's also painfully boring because you just know you watch a show, you know, the formula and you're like, oh, after the commercial, they're just going to come back and circle back to that one thing that happened. But I have to see it because I want to see them all get so excited about it. All right. So this has happened a couple of times in my life, but specifically last night. We were in a hotel. We just got back from traveling today last night at like eleven thirty p.m. Isn't too late, but we have a baby. So he was already asleep for a couple hours at this point at eleven thirty p.m. Some like kids, some like middle school kids were staying in the hotel, I think. But they just slammed our door like we were staying in a hotel. The door was locked with all the extra security locks. And then we're just sitting. Mandy and I were sort of laying in bed, like talking, kind of falling asleep. And it was just like. And like I heard feet, footsteps running away, right? Like I know that a human did it, but that just happened to be multiple times. How many people slam doors in hotels? I just really unlucky. That's never happened to me. It was scary. I've heard I've had noisy people in a hotel. I don't think they've ever slammed into my door. The box is waving at us, everybody. Hi, box. That's horrifying. What is happening to that box? Hi, box. Hi. OK, you stay back there. Don't don't attack me while we're recording. Unless that'd be great footage. I don't like that. Mandy's actually just off screen right now just doing that at some point she's just gonna lurch out tackle me okay so um hi welcome to distractible oh i assume that it has started already when when did we start the haunted box really threw me we're not gonna talk about why that's doing that if you're watching this on spotify you're seeing it but you're seeing it and like just you gotta really squint and hold your phone really close up to your face yeah it's probably small on your phone it's fine it's fine don't worry about it totally fine will won't zoom in on that or anything at any point it's it's just not a big deal you were right thank you for admitting it i thought i thought that we were just having a goof and it was just a joke for an episode our new house is haunted oh our new house so my mandy's parents live 20 minutes away from our new house right so we're it's in ohio we still we're still in california right now so they're like watching the place right they go over there the new house is haunted the new the new house we don't live in yet is already haunted they go over there and they like make sure everything's good make sure you know whatever make they just check on the house just to make sure and so this is the garage it's gonna show on my phone wow that's hideous there we go this is like a hatch like into the attic of the garage right yeah they went over there one day and they sent us they like panic sent us some text messages and we're like something something moved in the house we think someone's been in the house i can't we can't tell it's weird it doesn't seem like any no there's no break-in but look look they sent that like a week ago maybe or a week a while ago now and on that day they sent that and we were like whoa what the hell did the previous owners like leave something in the attic in the garage and they came back and broke into the house like they had a key or something and got in or what i like we don't know like what happened but uh for those listening at home sorry listeners good idea mark i wouldn't even tell them the first picture was like you know it's that attic access so you push up on it and it slides it's just a big piece of and then you climb in the hole into the attic the first picture was closed and sealed the second picture was slightly askew with gaps where i could see the dark darkness beyond but it looks like so i correct me if i'm wrong it looks like in order to move it you have to lift up and twist it this isn't just a panel that like can shift on it so it used to be push up right it's supposed to be set into a thing where you push up and it goes into the attic yes so it looks like my first thought was okay a raccoon or something but a raccoon skidding across it wouldn't lift it up necessarily unless they dug at it right yeah and there is a ladder in the garage according to our uh parents they they they put a ladder in the garage and they put a ladder in the garage and they left a ladder or something i think they went back to the house today when you shop kroger delivery you can expect the savings you love and fresh groceries delivered right to your door our refrigerated trucks keep your items fresh while our associates are committed to getting every detail right carefully selecting and packing your order with care because bringing you fresh quality groceries is what we do best and right now enjoy twenty dollars off your first online order of seventy five dollars or more restrictions apply seaside for details kroger fresh for everyone it's the same hatch more tilted open oh did they reset it when they saw it last time no so this is on the ceiling of like a pretty high garage right the garage is like 12 foot it's like a tall garage door so they couldn't reach it and and they're not trying to climb up on a ladder or something they just so they left it from the they left it in this garage and they left it in this garage in this condition here where it's very slightly tilted open that was a like a week ago ish that was a while ago they went back today and it's open by like a few more inches it's way more open your your reflections are showing in my phone hey guys how's it going hey i can see the latency so the house is haunted you bastards that's haunted that is haunted it doesn't look light it looks like it's got some weight to it no it's like made of wood it's got a metal like around the edge of the ceiling and it's just metal for like the seal got a handle on it it looks like it would it wouldn't be like hard to open but you would have to climb up a ladder and like and move it out of the way to get into the attic that thing's gonna be out and falling and breaking on the floor soon so it's either a ghost or someone lives in that attic i thought that's what i thought it was if i'm honest i thought they sold the house and didn't tell uh crenfield the guy who lives in the attic and then like he came out for his monthly trip to the grocery store it was like guys oh no oh god they forgot about credfield so fourth of july i went over to my mom's and we like my family came over and we had like a little get together for fourth of july and we had a weird event where we were sitting around talking and one of my like mom and sister's dogs went and like was chewing on they grow like their own like herbs and vegetables and stuff in their backyard and the dog went like like mid-sentence like we were talking to my mom and my sister my mom just starts yelling jalapeno jalapeno jalapeno and we're like okay we were talking about like cameras mom what the hell what just happened and she's like well it's hot i was like excuse me it's what we yell to the dogs to get them to stop eating stuff they're not supposed to because jalapenos are hot i was like you trained them on the jalapeno a four syllable word to sell them to stop or hot they're like well so why do you yell jalapeno yes the dog knows jalapenos are spicy and the dogs don't like spicy food but the dog doesn't know jalapeno it's just as shocked as we are that my mom goes from talking calmly and normally to screaming jalapeno like she's being murdered in the backyard we trained our dog to react to me screaming nonsense words out of nowhere very hysterically it always works because it's just so shocking my mom would be like oh yeah that's cool you know jalapeno jalapeno and um i thought she was being possessed by a demon because did we do an episode since i went ghost hunting no no wait you went ghost hunting yeah no i did go ghost hunting i don't know if that video will be out yet we're actually waiting on a cameo from a uh expert in the field to fully edit the video look forward to that but i went ghost hunting down at bob mackie's which is in newport kentucky it's like a bar that uh has a like being owned by the mob and people being uh interrogated in the basement and other such events we went down there and uh filmed some stuff and uh nobody would do the ouija board with me except for d live everybody was afraid like even non-believers were like ah ouija board which i don't get it what is so special about a ouija like you'll get a spirit box you'll be like ghost show yourself give me pinch me suck my balls ghost punch me ghost but if you touch a ouija board you're like what is your name they're like oh don't ask that not on a ouija board that's and the ouija board like says parker brothers on the bottom so it's a goddamn kid's toy but for some reason it's the scariest ghost hunting device and i don't understand it it's because they're real wade okay the rest of that stuff is technological google gobble ouija boards are made of wood and like plastic and glass and whatever and it's just real it's just the spirits reaching out and sending you a message okay people are waiting for you to come out and tell them that you're a ghost hunter okay people are waiting for you to come out and tell them that you're a ghost hunter okay are waiting for you to come out and tell them that you're a ghost hunter okay people are walking around with their holy people are walking around with their holy people are walking around with their holy water their cameras their emf readers all water their cameras their emf readers all water their cameras their emf readers all the other devices and they're like ghost the other devices and they're like ghost the other devices and they're like ghost pinch me throw a table at me do something pinch me throw a table at me do something pinch me throw a table at me do something and i'm like what year were you born and i'm like what year were you born and i'm like what year were you born they're like oh you fool that's a they're like oh you fool that's a they're like oh you fool that's a ouija board so we wrap up and we're ouija board so we wrap up and we're were coming home and i was like hey can you guys carry this i was like packing up equipment i was like trying to get someone to carry the ouija board no no one would touch it my sister went with this and she was like um i'm not taking that back home with me because it was their ouija board she's like you can have it so i brought the ouija board back and now i own a ouija board that everyone thinks is possessed by a demon and when my mom started fucking screaming jalapeno i was like oh my god they were right she's possessed you look over at the window and the ouija board is pressed up against the window and the thing is just frantically pointing at yes the ouija board is all yes yes yes yeah um but that was the only thing that could possibly have explained jalapeno until she told me what the hell was going on but ghost hunting man is it more expensive than i thought and it's like four or five hours of being in a very uncomfortable building uncomfortably with not much happening maybe it's because you got a cheap parker brothers one and not an actual authentic i thought that was authentic is there a is there a brand of authentic ouija board real ouija boards are hand hewn by monsieur ouija himself obviously they only come from the ouija part of france yeah everyone knows that you were using a sparkling board that joke really landed it's the same board that we use for drowned man oh well then you know it works yeah that's extra cursed so you're gonna burn that house down now that you moved into the library man please don't wish that upon me yeah no no no what's other disaster is funniest what what disaster would be funniest to befall you the gas leak man yeah dude i just had propane work done don't wish that upon me the carbon monoxide poisoning man the bad grading man all the water's gonna drain right up Against your foundation. Oh. Your basement's going to be so moist. The sinkhole man. Ooh. That one sounds dangerous. No. Oh, the other ones are safe? Yeah, probably. I don't know. I don't like any of this shit for the record. You know what's going to be cursed is your car. You ever get a car, that's where it's going to be. Well, I've beat them to the punch. If you don't have one, they can't curse you. The semi-man. The crashed man. The crushed man. Well, that sounds violent. Oh, yeah. The fired man sounds so less violent. You can run away from a fire if you're crushed. What are you going to do? Uncrush yourself? I don't know. Yeah, all the people that have died in fires, they just didn't run fast enough. Yeah, idiots. Obviously, you just run away from it. Fire can't be that fast. Silly, silly. I have something I want to play for you. Have you ever felt a chill up your spine? I don't know, man. Something just feels off. Like you know there's something standing right behind you. But you just can't. Then turn around. Cut it out, man. You're giving me the creeps. What if I told you that the world was stranger than you could ever possibly imagine? I've said it before and I'll say it again. But something just feels weird. Welcome to Unusual Oddities of an Unreal Understanding. Unusual Oddities? Unusual Oddities of an Unreal Understanding. I enjoy the reference back to turning around and ghosts. View discretion as advised. Of course. I can't believe you would interrupt that. I put so much work into that and you just interrupted? Yes. Interrupt the 15 second interlude in that song? Will, cut him out. Yeah, yeah. Cut him out of there. No, Amy was literally like, oh my god, that gap. They're going to start talking in there because they're going to think it's over. Well, yeah, there is an unnecessarily long pause. That is 50 seconds long. I don't know why in that song. I made that literally in between the break. I told you I was going to get food. I skipped food to make that. I don't know, man. Stop it, man. Like, zoinks, man. Oh my god, they never miss. Mark, how is that such a skill you possess? They're literally all bangers. I don't understand. Cards on the table. I found this in a Cracked article titled The Seven Most Ridiculous Ghost Stories from Around the World. And I read it passively while I was brainstorming ideas for this episode. But I came across this ghost and I had to tell you all about the Hantu Titek. So just to give you the background, the legend has it. The Hantu Titek is a female spirit apparition ghost. Some say a witch, a Balinese witch with an unimaginably enormous rack. And this ghost's purpose is only to float around and smother disobedient young men to death with her shocking bazooms. Guys might hear that and be like, all right, if I have to die. This is not like some anime fantasy girl is going to show up and come fulfill all your dreams or whatever. Hantu Titeks are described in a lot of ways. Generally, they're described as being very large or extremely obese, decrepit, looking like deathly old woman sort of look. But the real absolute banger of all of this is the hilariously large fun bags are in the spookiest location, not in the front where regular boobs go. They're located on the ghost's back. Yes, the spookiest place to have boobs, obviously. That's terrifying. Back boobs sound kind of nice to me. But anyway, this ghost comes from. This ghost comes from Malaysian culture and actually recently had quite the stir up in February of 2021, had quite the come up on Twitter. The account at Bunganberry, I have no idea what inspired this person to do this, but they posted some sketches of what they thought this ghost looked like. And Twitter couldn't decide if they were going to be horny about it or terrified about it. And they basically went with both. A lot of the responses were dudes just being like, oh, how do I summon a little Hantu Titek? I don't know. I want some of this and that. And a lot of them were like, I would not mess with this ghost. That sounds terrifying. Well, I mean, if it's a ghost, is it really actually going to be able to physically interact with you? It seems to suggest it might be some sort of poltergeist instead of just a ghost. Yeah, I mean, the descriptions are vague. This is an old. It comes from Malaysia. I am not Malaysian. I don't know if you can tell from my appearance or, you know, all the information you know about me. But, like, it's hard to find a lot. It's not online. I'll show you all of the links I found online. I will put in the Discord so you can look. Who knows how it uses the boobs to suffocate you? I don't want to find out. Being crushed to death is not a good. Volunteer's tribute. Okay. Never mind. I would deduct points from you. We all got to go sometime, man. If you're going to go, you might as well enjoy it. No! That's the exact logic that the stupid people are getting. You're getting crushed to death. It doesn't matter if it's between back-mams or front-mams. I survived 2020. Maybe I'll survive the back-boobs, too. You never know. I don't get how that's an appealing death. What is an appealing death? You're getting smooshed between humongous boobaloos. So, I will say, you guys, I don't know what pictures you've looked up exactly. Let me find the one. This website has some good imagery that really might swing your opinion about. It's not in English, and I couldn't get it to translate. It's from the Wayback Machine. But there are some images that I feel like might really be swing your opinion about whether or not you want to get smothered to death by those big old headlights. The top one's a little more childish, a little cartoony. But if you get to the bottom there, you really get more to the meat of what I think a Hantu to tech looks like. Because anime has taught us that boobs grow as, like, spheres or something. Perfectly spherical. We all know this. This is not how boobs work. I had to break it to you. I've never seen anything. It's not quite like that, though. They really are like scarves. Or like snakes, even. See, the problem is, like, I disagree fundamentally that bigger is always better when it comes to boobs. Like, uh. And to be perfectly honest, I shouldn't just be making big declaratives about judgment of boobs, you know, in general. I agree with your disagreement. I think that any size can be very nice. I'm gonna get myself in trouble, man. I'm a married man. Well, I didn't say bigger. Bigger may not be better, but I didn't say bigger was worse. You know? You know what I mean? No, I agree. I don't. I think it. Each titty deserves to be judged on its own merits. Yeah. Why do titties have to be judged? Why are you judging? Yeah, why do they gotta be judging? They're. It's like, uh. They're always. It's always a positive judge. Fuck. Fuck. I'm in trouble. Go ahead. But, yeah, look. So, this is an interesting topic. It stirs a lot of different emotions about general horniness, general discussion of, like, death, but death in a way that's sort of comical, but, like, does that make it better? The thing that I find really messed up about this saggy specter. Gotta work in my name. Nice, nice. At least to some extent, it comes. From my understanding, it comes from parents using this to scare their young male children into behaving themselves. Oh, yeah. Right. This isn't just, like, some. Like, I could totally imagine someone creative coming up with this character, some adult or whatever, someone, you know, teenager, older, coming up with this and be like, ah-ha, big tits and stuff. Ah, it's a scary, funny ghost. This was used. This was used by adults to influence children. And, like, I was a young boy once, right? And if my parents had described the giggity ghost to me as being very old and grotesque and scary-looking with back boobies that was confusing, I would probably be scared. But, like, young boys are really horny. Yeah. And I would definitely at least have toyed around with the idea of, like, how much do I misbehave to just get, like, a little threatening smoosh without actually being smothered to death? Like, where's the line? You just get slapped with one tit, you know? Like, it's a tough slap, but, you know, it's more disciplinary. I just posted a picture in Discord of something I found about the Hun-Tu-Ti-Tec. Ooh, man. Yeah. Might lean a little more on the horror side of things. That one I'd definitely lean a. That one would be one that would work. That's the worst. Yeah. When it's 50% nipple and. Yeah. If you're listening at home, you can find. Maybe. Find this on the. The Distractible Podcast website. Either that or we will do a faithful recreation of it. Or it won't exist at all. Unless we don't need a special license to post it. I don't know. Yeah, exactly. But, yeah, no, that doesn't look good. Sidebar, there's a whole discussion to be had of, like, the sexualization of breasts in general, you know, the stigma behind it and all that stuff. But for you guys, not even the nice pictures do anything for me. I don't look at this creature and I'm like, well, maybe. If I saw this and I wasn't sure it was just a person that needed help, I would be running and screaming as fast and as loud as I possibly could. Yeah, I don't think this is exactly what I would be fantasizing about ever. I mean, I think you're right. But also, like, your parents described this to you or maybe you see it and I think I agree. I would not see an image of any of these things in real life and be like, yeah, let's see where this goes. Sorry, this is my last one, but I got to work it in. I would come upon this flabbergasted. phantasm that's another point right there that's another point yeah and i would be absolutely shocked and running like you're describing but in my mind like this is you know it's kind of embarrassing to think about and admit but in my mind i know i would have fantasies about this you can't throw something that like sexual and i mean it's not sexual but the boobs like at least in in the culture i came up in boobs were sexual though and everything was like this weird i would twist it into a fantasy of like oh yeah that's pretty hot actually like you know what that's how that's how young boys minds work and maybe part of this is that malaysian culture is different maybe boobs are not as sexualized by the culture maybe it's a whole different thing maybe this is terrifying and i just don't understand it it's possible but i just think that would make that would have made it some really messed up childhood like fantasies and thought experience it's just a weird angle to go for keeping your kids in line there's got to be better ghosts and things to use to scare your kids into behaving right but wade here ready to pick it back up and uh bring it back i'm looking at this like wheel of emotions and they've got different colors associated with them but the three main colors are like red yellow and blue but red yellow and blue are kind of somewhat closer together and then they've got green across from red which is a little bit weird and for the life of me i cannot figure out why in the world it's designed that way instead of having red yellow and blue equidistant from each other and i'm just curious about that and i'm just curious about the difference between these colors and i'm just curious why green gets like two shades of green and a light blue but red and blue just have one pink between them uh red and yellow just have one orange between them and i don't know why green gets so much love on this are you trying to distract me is that what do you mean oh is that on the list that's crazy i've never been more focused on anything in my entire life are you kidding me oh my god for those who weren't watching for that moment there's no words i could describe except yes i have words to describe that oh uh sorry my little weird paper towel ball yeah i'll try to describe it listeners wade sat with his face barely in in the shot and that's why he sounded so distant and then he was just waving a weird crumpled up paper towel in and out of the other side of the shot the whole time he was talking about the colors oh man mark says this is the best episode ever i had to give it my all i don't like to admit it to anyone but yes i paid this man 60 to come to my house so i could smell his fingers on my birthday oh did you yes three separate times i smelled this man's fingers three times that's a little strange and none of the times that his fingers smell like maple syrup they were bad it got away from bad to worse the mystery thickens you know and there were only two pipes you rubbed on so i really i honest i swear to god i don't know what the third one was that i smelled but they were all bad i don't mean to say it but have you thought about a canadian ghost like i hadn't there are a lot of canadian ghost refugees in ohio are you are you is your house on a canadian burial ground is this like i i just gotta ask yes people do they they uh they have their pilgrimage from canada to cincinnati to bury their loved ones where i live quite often i feel it i had an experience in phasmophobia the other day so phasmophobia added this new map a new game mode a nightmare mode a new map called the campsite and in the campsite there's this campfire and sitting by the campfire is just a campfire and there's a campfire and there's a like an acoustic guitar laying against like one of the chairs and immediately all i could think of is like campfire guitar guy don't want to be campfire guitar guy i don't want to be that one guy and uh something this ghost what the ghost name was but uh one of the audio clues is to figure out where it was it randomly played the guitar like it just strummed it so i heard the guitar play and i was like you gotta be fucking kidding me we actually have a campfire guitar guy ghost and i jokingly said that it was a yokai and yokais are the ghosts that get angry and are more likely to hunt if you're talking and using your microphone it can hear you and it gets more agitated and more likely to hunt sure and i said that because i was like well if there's one thing that campfire guitar guy doesn't want to want people talking while they're trying to steal the show and have all eyes on them and ended up being a yokai but it made me think of the that one guy campfire guitar guy not to point any fingers at anybody that i know but i do know a couple of campfire guitar guys that carried around guitars or carry around guitars and uh not necessarily did it for the whole same reasons as the stereotype but i definitely think of like you know you watch a movie and there's a stereotypical guy that you know people are sitting on the beach having a fun conversation someone's just like oh by the way uh we play wonderwall for you and they pull out their acoustic guitar out of nowhere and everyone has to stop talking and just put their eyes on campfire guitar guy who's miraculously not wearing a shirt you know hair drooped down to their shoulders muscly playing their guitar and everyone's just like well we were talking and having a good time i guess we'll just stare at you now and i got that ghost and phasmophobia but that's another that one guy no no campfire guitar guys i've never experienced that in real life ever no you you talk about campfire guitar guy way more than anyone has ever experienced campfire guitar guy because i i know this is a thing that you tell your campfire guitar guy talking about campfire guitar guy guy you literally mentioned campfire guitar guy he's any turn i remember when i was trying i was playing the guitar like for the tour and i was like yeah i'm trying to improve better myself and you're like oh here comes campfire guitar guy with his guitar i think you just hate people that play guitar i might maybe i'm gonna do jesus i didn't i shouldn't have put my desk up and standing but i almost just fucking fell over oh my god this image is a guy uh with his hands up in fist form with his chin resting eyes closed and the fart genie is leaving his armpit yeah imagine the statue of the thinker yeah the man is pulling a double thinker why is he grabbing his head like that wants to make sure he's not he doesn't look back here to see what's going on you know keep that head turned to me this guy's like you don't want to see what i'm about to do bro oh wow i feel like this this one's such a peculiar image it must be obvious it's the most trash bag like ghost i've ever seen it's like someone saw one of those online tutorials like all you need is some chicken wire and paper mache and you can make a ghost decoration for your front yard for halloween and then they tried to make it and they got this maybe it's the angle but like the face of the ghost does not look like it could possibly be this dude's face this gave me an idea because i'm gonna get back into learning korean as soon as i'm done with this freaking movie these would be great for flash cards this would be great for flash cards for korean because for flash cards what's really good if you have image flash cards is getting images that are memorable but also completely unique i don't think that there's anything more unique than this and if you can even relate even somehow relate it to a word or a sentence this would be very good for that all right i'm blaze you tell me if you hear it isn't something smell a little ah off to you it's too loud it's a little loud but yeah i do hear it back up pretend you didn't hear that all right here we go ready are you ready no don't do it again isn't something smell off to you hey do you smell something well that's a weird smell i don't know what you're talking about i don't know what you're talking about you don't know what you're talking about you don't know what it is have you ever felt the chill run up your spine well it was like something trapped me on the shoulder but when i turned around get ready to forget everything you know about everything guys i'm still smelling something weird a whole city of people just turning round and round endlessly all right if someone doesn't say they're smelling what i'm smelling i swear i'm oh my god what happened to the moon you expect me to believe we're surrounded by gases that's why i'm here i don't know what's going on i don't know what's gases that we cannot see i know what clouds look like those are clouds welcome to the show that was formerly known as don't look up but we were sued by some dumb ass in a movie studio this is it's in the air viewer discretion is advised so when i told you i was late because i was working on a thing mark it's so good sorry it was so loud i tried to do a hack to get it to play for you guys i was pretty sure mark was late to the recording today because he was working on this i think i'm understanding why iron lung's taking a while damn you look guys i'm not gonna lie he spent three days on this so i'm not gonna lie i spent so long working on this this morning i didn't come up with an idea i did this because i was like oh i'm gonna bring up the small thing during small talk this will be a funny way to do it because i haven't done one in a while and i had a bunch of i had a bunch of problems with the software because i haven't done it on this computer in a while and so i had to i had to reinstall da vinci and all my software so anyway did you that admission actually gave me a headache my brain could not comprehend you'll never guess what i'm googling right now you're trying to figure out what gravity is what is this he's like apparition welcome to the first sushi restaurant in space you won't have no gravity here you'll be eating your sushi flowing through the air i got the ghost of seito takahashi here a real dead apparition to cook you your sushi not a lot of cooking going on mostly just cuts it up but he's good for a ghost and You're going to be good for paying money for this fish. It gets sent up with a catapult in space, flash frozen in an instant, right into our back door. It gets sushi from the water to your mouth, all in the first sushi restaurant in space. Come with your friends. Never leave. Teacher stick and action. Are you tired of ghosts in your kitchen? Trying to eat dinner, but they're on a mission? If you and your friends want peace like we do. We gotta try our new ghost trap. We're ready to assist you. Do you have apparitions in your kitchen causing you quite a stir? Well, we have the new apparition trap ready for you. It uses a gravity-based system that lures them in, and we have learned a very unusual secret that ghosts are attracted to dead fish. Therefore, we use sushi as a bait. We place it on the trap. The ghosts fly over, grab the sushi. The gravity well sucks them in, and they're put in the trap, bringing you peace. And you don't have to leave the dinner table. To catch them, and you can enjoy your meal. Call us today. Who were the people on the side? You don't know that reference? What, does no one here know references? That was the Ghostbusters bit. That was the Ghostbusters. When they're on the TV, their commercial. We're ready to believe you. I don't think I've ever actually seen Ghostbusters. What? I have to do the rest of this episode in this closet. Oh, this broken closet. All right. This is my curse. Bye. No, no, no, no. People in the closet aren't cursed. That's not how that works. Oh, I'm gone. I'm a ghost. Oh, my God. He's actually gone. Wait, no. Hold on, actually. I don't have object permanence, so I'm scared. Oh, that gave me chills there. Weirdly enough. I was like, where did he fucking go? What the fuck is that? Mark, I need to borrow your tape. No. Oh, my God. You can have it. Jesus Christ. Where'd he go? Oh. Oh, my God. No, it was a ghost. It was a ghost hand. This is why we're the top three. In the top 50 of best podcasts in the world. This right here is why. Are we still there? Are we still top 50? Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. I'll take the win. And the fuck did I just hear? What's happening in everyone else's locations today? What? The hell? He's just leaving. I heard what sounded like someone crawling on all fours down my hallway. That's such a specific sound. How would you know that sound? It's like a slidey, slappy noise. Slidey, slappy? I might be about to get Samarid. Well, I'm going to keep the recording rolly then. I don't want to leave the camera. Theory. Theory. I'm scared of everything. It's because I have aphantasia. I can't imagine what anything looks like. So while I'm experiencing things, as soon as I have it in my head, it's like, oh, there's a ghost. But then in my head, I'm like, what does a ghost look like? Which one's a ghost? And then in real life, my body is like, oh. We don't know. It could be anything. Because I don't know what it is. It's just a feeling. And the feeling is fear. That's interesting. That's an interesting thought, though. Maybe. Because if everything's always unknown to you because you can't picture it, that's. What does a ghost smell like? I imagine bad, but it's hard to say. In an age where digital content reigns supreme, a mysterious audio series emerges, captivating minds with its enigmatic themes and challenging narratives. But behind the allure lies a shadow organization with a hidden agenda. As listeners become. Unwitting participants in a clandestine experiment. Ethical boundaries are shattered and lives are irrevocably altered. Unbeknownst to them, select individuals are identified for their psychic potential. Drawn into advanced studies from which some never return. As desperate families and anonymous insiders come forward, the question arises, how did a seemingly innocuous form of entertainment become a conduit for something so dark and dangerous? Well, it all lies in the person at the center of these events. The eye of the storm that is the whirlpool of darkness and dismay. I would like to start with some quotes that pertain to the event from people that were affected directly. Quote from Sarah Williams: "I was a regular listener of Distractable, but things changed when they sent me a cryptic email after I submitted my reactions to one of their special episodes. It was as if they were probing not just for my opinions, but for something deeper, something inexplicable. I didn't sign up to be a lab rat, so I unsubscribed. Still, it makes you wonder what they're really after." Another: "After I responded to a prompt in a Distractable episode, they sent me an invite for what they called 'Phase 2'. I was curious, so I agreed. The next episode was different, intense, disorienting, seemingly spinning off in random circles, covering topics they already talked about weeks, sometimes years before. I had nightmares, and then I started seeing things, shadows, flashes of images that weren't there. Whatever they were doing, it's not just a podcast anymore. Something darker, and I want to know part of it." At the core of all this is one man. One man. Above all else. Bob Meiskens, host of the popular podcast Distractable, is in fact a cover for a sinister government operation known as Project Distraction. In the podcast, Bob seems to talk about random, unrelated topics, but in reality, he's subtly planting seeds of doubt and distrust in the minds of his listeners. It's all a psychological experiment, aimed with identifying potential recruits for the organization. I'm here to expose the truth about it. Wait! Would you. When you shop Kroger Delivery, you can expect the same. The savings you love, and fresh groceries delivered right to your door. Our refrigerated trucks keep your items fresh, while our associates are committed to getting every detail right. Restrictions apply. Kroger. Fresh for everyone. "I'd like to contribute. I found some information. That I found to be very intriguing. That, uh, I don't know, Mark, if this corroborates what you found, or if this is its own thing. I have found evidence from, what was the name of the person you, did you say Sarah Williams?" "Yeah, Sarah Williams." "Okay, this is either the same Sarah Williams or a different Sarah Williams, 'cause I've also got information from Sarah Williams." "Probably the same." "Suggesting that there are either two, he's living a double life, or he has a twin he's never revealed. While the well-known version of Bob MySkins is a well-known YouTuber and gaming content creator who's primarily known for his gaming videos and collaborates with our content, Sarah Williams talks of the same person in an entirely different set of circumstances, and I actually have her testimony. Sarah Williams is an investigative journalist with a passion for unraveling mysteries, and is an avid fan of MySkirm's gaming adventures and content. She heard some rumors floating around that there was a Robert MySkins, a scientist and inventor, doing all kinds of like ungodly, horrible deeds in the town of, let me see what it was, Pixelville. He was known far and wide as MySkirm, a name that since shivers down my spine, I've been calling myself. He was known far and wide as MySkirm, a name that since shivers down the spines of those who heard it. MySkirm had a reputation for being a recluse. He resided in a grand, ancient mansion on the outskirts of town, a mansion that seemed to hold secrets of centuries past. Some said it was cursed, while others believed it was filled with hidden treasures. The townsfolk whispered tales of ghostly apparitions and unexplained phenomena surrounding the mansion, fueling the curiosity and fear of the locals. One fateful day, a young and brave journalist, Sarah, arrived, determined to uncover the truth about MySkirm's alienatic mansion. She believed there was more to the story than the spooky legends circulating the town. Her journey was fraught with obstacles, including skeptical townsfolk who warned her to stay away. But undeterred, she persisted, researching old archives and interviewing those who dared speak about MySkirm. As she delved deeper into the mystery, she discovered that he had once been a renowned inventor and scientist. His mansion held countless inventions, many of which were years ahead of their time. "One evening," she wrote, "as a storm raged outside, I ventured into the mansion, determined to find the truth. I uncovered hidden rooms filled with mesmerizing gadgets, intricate blueprints, and a journal detailing Bob's life's work. I realized that MySkirm had not been a recluse out of fear or malevolence, but rather to protect his revolutionary creations from falling into the wrong hands. As I explored further, I encountered a holographic projection of Bob himself. In this hologram, he explained he had dedicated his life to advancing technology for the betterment of humanity. He remained hidden to safeguard his inventions and ensure they would only be revealed when the world was ready for their potential. I asked, "What about your public persona, your gaming content, your streams?" To which he replied, "Oh, I'm not prepared to talk about that, for you see, that's not me." And as soon as it begun, the hologram ended, leaving Sarah confused, wondering, "What did he mean? Were there two Bobs? Was it one Bob? Did he have a twin?" And such, a lot is left to our imaginations. Yeah. I've got to actually, I think I corroborate that perfectly, because there's an anonymous insider from the organization that this mysterious Bob was running that is trying to expose the truth. They said, "I worked or I work or worked within the organization behind Distractable. The public needs to understand that this isn't just an experiment. It has real consequences. People have disappeared and not just figuratively. I can't reveal myself. I can't reveal my identity for obvious reasons, but someone has to blow the whistle on this. Don't engage with their special episodes. Don't become another missing piece in their twisted puzzle." What I think is happening is it's a consciousness upload program, where they're trying to get people to upload their consciousness and then use their corporeal forms as puppets that they can control the population. So you think the public persona version is forming an audience just to have sheep to lead to the slaughter, so to speak? Absolutely. You upload the consciousness of the individual. They can exist online making content they've never seen them in real life. It's Pied Piper leading them all into the machine slaughter. I feel like if we looked at certain points of Bob's career, we could probably pinpoint the progress, what he was uploading, how he was acting, where he was living in different events that were happening in those areas. I think there's a lot of dots to be connected and Sarah Williams is the key. Yeah. I actually have another quote from Sarah Williams. I think it's her last one. So this is from a, this is a text transcription of an audio log that Sarah left behind on her final exploration. I've made it into a room that appears to be some sort of control center. There are monitors displaying real time analytics of listener engagement. management, biometric data, even geolocation. It's not just a podcast. It's a data collection operation on a massive scale. And there's something else. Files marked Phase 3. I didn't open them, but their very existence is chilling. This isn't just unethical. It's organized, premeditated exploitation. I've gathered as much evidence as I can and I'm getting out of here before I'm discovered. What I've seen goes beyond mere speculation or conspiracy theory. It's organized manipulation with unknown but clearly dangerous aims. Whoever's behind this has resources, intelligence, and a complete disregard for ethical boundaries. Listen, if you're tuning into that podcast or thinking about it, just stop. Don't be another pawn in their game. I'll do everything in my power to expose them. But for now, stay safe and stay skeptical. People have disappeared and the rest is just screaming. I tried to look up what happened to her and what I got was Sarah Williams, the intrepid investigative journalist, had always been relentless in her pursuit of the truth. But when she got too close to a shadowy conspiracy, she mysteriously vanished leaving behind a trail of clues and a haunting question that still lingers in the world of journalism. Kind of fits what her warning was all about. Absolutely. I think at the core of all this, we need to look more deeply into who this Robert is. Agreed. Also, Bob points. So, listen. Hey, folks, that's all we have time for. Today on the Curious Conspiracy Corner, we've explored some wild theories, some wacky ideas, maybe even ventured a bit too close to the edge of absurdity. Remember, conspiracy theories are meant for entertainment purposes, not for taking seriously. So please don't go accusing anyone of secret syndicates or government activity or anything without any evidence, which we did not present any today because this was just for jokes and stuff. And yeah. Watch new episodes on Spotify. Our refrigerated trucks keep your items fresh while our associates are committed to getting every detail right, carefully selecting and packing your order with care, because bringing you fresh, quality groceries is what we do best. Restrictions apply. Kroger, fresh for everyone.