Getting a Massage + Medicine

The following podcast is a "Dear Media Production" "Hey, can you come pick me up?" "Yeah, what's wrong?" "Nothing?" "Pretty sure." "Yeah, no, I just need a ride." "Right." "Oh, I don't know why I just want to have fun." "I'm Benito Skinner." "I'm Mary Beth Brown." "And this?" "Is." "Right." "Welcome to Great Britain's biggest library." "So anything can happen, even Gatsby can happen." "Do you get that?" "Yeah, I do." "Wait, I'm going to take shoes off." "Oh wait, I'm going to break the fourth wall." "The Great British Library." "This is our Great British Library episode." "This is our Great British Library." "Our Great Big British Library episode." "And I'm not wearing shoes or socks and that's my prerogative because it's my podcast." "I will say that if we ever one day get to build our own studio, I'm doing it brick by brick." "Exactly like this fucking place." "A perfect recreation." "Like, down to the books." "What's the song in the library in Beauty and the Beast?" "Tail as old as time." "Is that really in the library?" "True as it can be, barely even friends, friends." "Yeah, that's not my register." "So you're on your own." "So you're on your own." "It's not, isn't it?" "Wait, think about that." "Okay, first things first. What you're talking about when I interrupted you was Vogue's YouTube channel." "Wow, it just, and here's the thing. Stick with us, we'll get to it." "And I'm always in it." "No, don't juice." "No, you ate a cracker sandwich." "You ate that sandwich, girl." "It's giving you sandwich." "Come on, sandwich." "That sandwich was a whole as well." "No, for real." "For real." "Oh my god, I felt like such a fool today, and the whole time I kept thinking, well, that was a whole as well." "So what do you love about Vogue's YouTube channel?" "Well, I just think it has so many great little videos, and I love the makeup ones. I love the 73 questions. It's been a while." "But can I tell you something crazy?" "And again, this is industry. I'm not, this is just our job sometimes." "I was making a commercial, I think with like meta a while ago, and then the guy's shooting it. I just kept thinking, his voice is freaking me out. Why have I heard this voice before?" "And he is Mr. 73 questions." "And then he finally went, I am the guy who does 73 questions." And I was like, I lead with that. "Yeah, I have to." "I spent the past hour in my head. Like, I didn't hear a thing you said, because I was thinking, I love when they do, you know, my favorite thing in the 73 questions, the format of it is when they'll ask one, and then I'm throwing up this Joe in the juice." "Can you stop?" "And this cracker sandwich is hidden." "Well, it's such pointy." "Well, this is really decimating my insights." "Joe in the juice has not reached out for comment." "No, the dead silent." "Nothing." "Well, the DM that I got that said, your silence is defining, because they spelled deafening wrong." "Definitely." "Your silence is defining." "Well, think about that." "And I did." "And say that in the library." "I don't." "Congress." "Wait, I didn't say the thing." "I love when. " "And hey, well, wait, I'm about to move on." "No, I know I gotta rip through." "I only have so much." "You have a agenda." "Well, we gotta do this quicker, shall we?" "There's an electric guitar across from me." "I'm telling you." "We got it, kid." "But where they do the kind of thing where it's like, they answer one thing, something, and then the next one, they'll do the same answer." "So, you know, they'll be like," "What's your favorite color?" "And then it's like, what's a color you'd never wear?" "Green." "And you know, they do it twice." "That's a really bad example, but yeah." "That doesn't make any sense." "It would be more like," "What's your favorite fruit orange?" "What's your favorite color?" "Orange." "Exactly." "So, that's kind of the difference between us." "What's your favorite drink?" "Orange." "Wait, I want to do it and answer orange for everything." "For everything." "But I'm back in London, so I'll have material for at least a month." "Maybe two." "Right." "We're only here for a couple days, though, but we had to see this." "Because I was so sad the second I left last time I thought I didn't see any podcast studios." "So, it's good to be here." "It's because I wasn't with you." "Exactly." "Let's talk about blocking random people just to make them think." "Yeah, so here's my thing. Lately, I run hot. I mean, I know people are going to be like Scorpio season, or they're not." "Wait, I love saying that. Just like, I know Blake, but or not." "Or not." "So, you're kind of covering all of our bases." "It's kind of been my whole thing, Lately. I put myself out there, and then I keep just getting like completely shit, right?" "Like, I'll just be like. " "Oh, yeah, babe." "It's so bad, and so I'll do it." "And then I'm like, or I could just like never speak to you again." "Or anyone for that matter." "I'm so sorry, I even like came out." Like, I, oh my god, I had this happen. And I'm not going to say who, but it was an actor that I really loved. And I went up to them and I'm like, oh, I'm just such a fan. You're an icon. They puffed so much vape. "I don't even remember who this was." "In my head, I'll tell you later. Not in the library." "It's not appropriate." "I just thought, damn, I'm never going to do that ever again." "You love the mirror, baby." "That's the, yeah." "Like, it was very ribbit. I was very rabbit." "You only want to do ribbit on purpose, intentionally. If something's unintentionally ribbit, it's like, oh." "And we could leave it at that." "And so that's what we have to say this week." "That's kind of that on that." "But blocking random people just to make them think." "But yeah, I think what's so cool about it, it's like, if someone has done something and I like not even telling the person that they've done it, just block." "Because it's like, I want them to go, wait, wait, wait, wait, what happened?" "It blocked me." "But it's fun to do it for people that didn't really do anything." "Yeah." "Just to say like, hey." "I'm just curious. Like, I just want you to know, like, just in one moment, I had a flash of just pure raw anger towards you. And I just let her rip. And you know what? And you'll never see me again." "No, probably never. I walk out of the Great British Library." "Britain's biggest library." "Oh my god, it can picture Belle walking in here." "I know." "Oh, these books." "Yeah." "Beast was like, you're kind of annoying, though." "You get it, you read books." "I feel like I'm being interviewed now, you have all these books." "Because we have a lot of like, we haven't recorded in like, two weeks, so I feel like we just have a lot in here. And I want to get through half of them in this episode and half of them in the next one." "Great." "So I'm just trying to get through these." "Treat it like just like this." "It's sort of like a job." "Yeah, well it's a job." "I do think a lot of podcasts are going to be like. " "It's like a job." "Oh, you're having fun." "No, no, no, this is a job." "This is a job." "I have a new era." "I just said it to the camera, don't curve." "I have a new era." "What is it, sweetie?" "After someone says something completely random, you just say, 'I know you're going to say that.'" "You told this to me and I thought, because why this is so you is, because I can't think of anything that would make the person more uncomfortable." "Yeah, well, I go." "I did this music video that I won't tell anymore about, because I'm not sure if it's out yet, because I keep forgetting. " "Well, I keep asking him a day, it's going to come out, and it's different, so I don't want to say anything about it." "But basically, the guy that was doing my hair, Brian," he was like, "Oh, this is a fig tree." Like, I can tell, it's like, whatever, whatever. And I just went, "I hear you're going to say that." And he goes, "Really?" "You knew I was going to go uncle on it and talk about this tree." I just said, "Yeah." "My dad, he reminds me of this game, my dad used to have, that like, as a kid, I was just like, "I roll, but now I'm kind of like, fuck, that is kind of fun." "That's neat to feel joy too." "Totally, and I'm like, do this bit, like, you can tour it, it's funny, where he'll be driving somewhere, and if it's not like, a place we live." So, for instance, we were in Baltimore, where my aunt lives, and we were driving somewhere into my grandma. My dad was like, "I'll know exactly where I am if I see the A&W sign." And it's like, he's just saw it. "Oh, amazing." And my grandma was like, "Holy fuck, like, there it is!" "That's genius!" It's really, it is because every, I've never seen somebody get the joke. Like, every time they're like, "Oh my God, right there!" Like, it's really -- Okay, so he has literally a running bit. And then my dad goes, "I fucking made a fool of you, [bleep]." And that's it. You're so stupid, [bleep] Yeah, he's the seward a lot. Yeah, wait, bleep, all that shit. I did notice that the first few times I met him. Just a lot of sewards. Is that terrible that I just said it? No, we'll bleep it if we want. I don't think Pete Buttigieg is the answer to all of our problems. I'll say that. I really don't fuck with him. He said in a debate or at a town hall that if he could press a button to not be gay, he would. And so I was just like, "That's not a man that stands on business. That's not a man that stands on, like, his own ethics and morals. That's not a man. If you don't stand for something, you'll fall for anything." You know what's crazy? If you give me a button that said, "You can't be gay anymore or die, I would choose die." Yeah. Actually, I'd be straight for two weeks, then come back and get the other button. I would just be curious to see what happens in my career. Probably a lot of good. Well, then I just stick around. But then I got to go. Yeah. Goodbye. Yeah. I just don't like, like, a lot of people really ride for him, and I just, I don't see it personally. And say that, and I'm glad you did. Yeah, I don't see it. Did I put anything in there? I think I had a couple little things I wanted to just. You said you needed to talk about something unbelievable again. So, something unbelievable for those joining in. I think it was something. It was one of the first times where I really just let her rip on here. I want to show you something. Something unbelievable. Yeah. And I see him everywhere. And I feel him. And he's also a part of me in a lot of ways. But one of the things that's unbelievable is that he showed the girl is displaced. But somebody goes, "What is the origin of it?" And again, it's just kind of like you're in Europe. and again. guy comes up and he's wearing kind of like an interesting polo with like all kinds of patches and flair on it. -Armani jeans. -Armani exchange, my life. -Sorry. -That's what I meant. -AE. -The exchange was implied. -Of course. Drop the exchange. -It's cleaner. -So, he comes up and he shows you this and he might kill you later. He just goes, "I want to show you something. Something." -He has the same accent. Sebastian is his name. -He has the same accent. -As Kostas and sister of the dragonbeats, which we talked about before because the line delivery of is it or is it something kills because he's not Greek. -Oh, yeah. -He doesn't actually have a Greek accent. The actor might be Greek. I'm not sure. I haven't looked into his lineage. -I looked him up recently. -I looked him up recently because he was a gay awakening for me. -Or is it something kills? -Something else. -I know. He was like, "Can we not use that take?" And they were like, "Sorry." -They go, "Sorry." -It's kind of like that. They said, "We didn't pull focus on the last one, so unfortunately we're going to have to use that one." -I will say every now and then you see a bat shit take and I had a couple in the show and it's just kind of like, "Fuck it, keep it." To think that everyone always responds and a thing that's totally in line with them or normal. I don't know. I think sometimes it is that kind of-- -It's not realistic. It's not Shakespeare land. -No, literally. -I always wanted to record the pod in front of it. What is it? -Well, books, books are-- -What even is it? -What do I call that? -An edition. -Oh, first edition. -In front of a-- -Well, the first edition of, you know, of My Sin Man, like I had to be here for that. -Hotelys Steinbeck. -I love Steinbeck. -So-- -I knew you'd say that. -Lacey. I knew you were going to say that. -Lacey Burone and a Twinkish Strait guy named Bonito, Jenny Han. There's easy ways to say you listen to ride, honey. -See you in media. -Clip that. -Lacey Burone, I don't claim her. Just, you know, she's not one of my cousins. I don't have any cousins with that name. -Okay. -She's fictional. -But I'm going to top it. -It's definitely a journey. And I would say, like, I'm glad it's over in the sense, well, they're doing a movie, which I will be fucking sad for. -I know you will. -I just wanted, like, the anguish for these characters to end. And I think it has in a really beautiful way. And I think she went with the guy that I think she should be with. So I'm thrilled for her. -Yeah. -And I just think, you know, there were definitely some moments where I didn't agree with the characters. And that's okay. And I'm sure people felt that about overcompensating. -I think that's great. She's really incredible, Jenny Han. She, like, I mean, it's full pandemonium. And she did it with "Tal the Boys." I've- I've written before. -It's really the first season of "Thompson." -Thompson was a ribbed before. -Right. -That was that big joke that hit you the first time. So I'm going to go, let's just focus on it and say it one more time. -Well, the rule of thirds, that's one more later. So here's the thing. But yeah, I think she's incredible. I mean, also, that must be so gratifying in the end to, like, do the end. Like, I've been thinking about that a lot of, like, getting to tell a story and getting to wrap it up. Like, we really are out here just completely raw. Like, overcompensating really ended raw. -It's raw. -Yeah. -And we're excited to see where you were. -You were really shocked that you were so good that day. And I do want to say, to anyone who I'm so excited, the overcompensating score and soundtrack is now available. I think everywhere, it should be Amazon Music, Apple, and Spotify. I was just listening, walking around London. I did cry. So I would say this soundtrack, it could send you to the Looney Ben if you're not really just making sure that the track is for itself. It is so unbelievable. That was the chair. Now, I have to do repetition to prove. There you go. -So I'm cracking me up today. -I know. Alex Summers, George Daniel, George Daniel, Charlie XX, Amber Bane. Wow. -That'd be nice. -I want to say thank you. And that took a long time because we had to get all our ducks in a row, but they took so much pride in their work. It's so. Go listen. It's just like. Do your homework to it. You know what I was thinking? It's a lot like teenage dream. You can fuck to it. You can cry to it. You can dance to it. -Work out to it. -You can die to it. -Yeah. -Work out to it. -It's like the best score I've ever heard. -I can't wait to blast it in our hotel room later. -Oh, my God. Are we friends? -Yeah. -Actually, it's one of the. I can't really hum it. -Hey, Barones. 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I am riding. This is a mini ride and then we'll get into what we ride for. Yeah, what's your mini ride? I'm mini riding for people who are my friends, fucking my exes. Like I'm not mad about it. I just think it's a fascinating move, as I'll say. I don't think there's like ownership over people, right? If you've never met me and you fuck one of my exes, like obviously that's fair game. I mean, I still might be weird to you at an event, but that's my prerogative and what did I say at the beginning of the season? My opinions aren't always correct, there's nothing more than opinions. But I think to be my friend and do it is just utterly fascinating. Yeah. And that's one where I'm like, I don't know. You must start to go into a Catholic school because the only thing I was given is like deep guilt. Yeah. It's crazy. But yeah, I mean, that was an immediate block for me. I think I know what you're talking about. Yeah. It's just weird. It can be so simple. That's what I say to people. I found out that someone said something bad about Mary Beth at an event. And court. It wasn't me. And I said, take, I go, take my phone, do it. Unfollow. Who did it? You? I don't remember. Because I was driving. So probably me. Because you know, I'm all about safety on the road. Totally. Yeah, it's fun. It's interesting. I guess just like people making choices that I wouldn't necessarily do. But whatever life is a highway. I guess the thing is like at some point, if I go full like demon bitch mode, like a lot of people are going to be really sad because I'm a fucking decimate. I had to decimate someone this week. Who'd you get permission from? I got permission from you to go in person and decimate someone. Getting to write an all caps decimate, you know, I'm destroyed. Destroy it. Destroy it. This second I walked in here. That's true. And that's of course Elizabeth Hurley in Gossip Girl. Elizabeth Hurley in Gossip Girl. Some are kind of wonderful. She takes Nate Archibald into a bedroom that later turns out to be hers in her mansion. And she asked a high schooler to fuck her ride in it. Yes. So yeah. I'm in it. I don't know. It's like I might decimate some people soon. Like I got the taste for it. Yeah. I don't do it much. But when I do it, like you're going to remember. And you're going to root the day. That deer remembers. You're going to root the day. I mean, it was as evolved as I am now. So yeah. So we're so happy to have you guys here today. So thank you so much for joining us here at Ride. Yeah. And I guess what I'm riding for this week is you're going to ride for. I'm riding for the art of massage. And I'm going to ride for medicine. Oh, some would say. Yeah. Very intertwined. Yeah. I go first. Would that be okay? I'll allow it this once. Just this once. Wait. Where are we going? Who cares? Ride. So massage. And this is obviously coming from massage privilege. At this point, it's health privilege, travel privilege. I had to post about denim privilege the other day, and now we have massage privilege. But I want to say this as well, there are places you can go where massages are extremely inexpensive. And sometimes those are the best massages. I'm dying to get one in Thailand. There's a few of these YouTube channels where these guys do it on the street. And it's like unbelievable. I think time massage is my favorite type of massage. It's truly so unbelievable. I love when someone walks on me. You've taken me there a little. I love this place. I love this place tonight. My new thing too. I guess if I died for something, it would be gatekeeping because I just think like how much time do we have left? We don't know. Let's hit the ground running. So I guess I should say everyone that fucked my exes. Yeah. Well, we don't have that much time left. Yeah, exactly. That'll be a serious finale. Well, the serious finale. Ride will just be like kind of audio clips. Like we're reading names for something. Well, here's what I'm dying for. I want someone to do a tar edit of the podcast. Like they do in the movie where they cut everything together to make it sound like she's being so fucked up. Like edit us to be saying like, I don't think women should have rights. - That was my one thing in that movie where I'm like, I don't think students would believe, like that to me was my one thing where I was like, wait. - Students might not, but the average person who is on mine might, I mean, the media literacy is so bad. - We're stuck for Z-Fakes and AI. - That's what scares you. - I don't like it, but I think it'd be funny to have an edit of the pod. - Oh, definitely. - That makes us look crazy. - Yeah, I'm sure that'll, I don't know how much editing they'll need. - No, to make it look like we're saying bad stuff. Women shouldn't be in the workplace. That sort of thing. - They'd find that easy. - I'm sure. - We can give that to them. - We'll just give it to them clean. - So yeah. - There's this place in LA called, I believe it's time massage on Hillhurst. They are so fabulous. Like everyone is just so skilled and talented and you can go and you can get 30. You can get 60. You can get 90. If I get 90, they're like every time they go, you're gonna enjoy your sleep tonight because they know. One time though, I got a massage. And I will say, I like, I like deep. I like, let's take it there. I don't want to be tickled. I want to be rocked. - Yeah. - You don't understand. - I get it. - Like each. - And so I go and I went to Thai, Thai massage on Hillhurst and after, the woman looked at me and she was like, should you be driving home? - I just, I literally, I saw what I looked like. It's like a heartbeat after. I looked like a hoe. It was so, I looked like I had been fucking right through. My hair was full, Jimmy Neutron. My face was so, I mean, 'cause it's just, it is so good for you. It's good for serotonin. - Circulation. - If any of this isn't true, I don't care. - Yeah. - Serotonin, endorphins, circulation. I take an Epson salt bath after. Like as someone who I, I got a really bad back when I was in high school 'cause during track. He's like carrying this ass across the finish line, you know. - Not everyone can do it. - Not everybody can do it. - Not everyone's capable. - Thank you. There's also Swedish massage. Swedish massage. - That's a tough one. - Oh, difficult to say. - Swedish massage. - So difficult to say. - But which I also just like, it's divine, it's divine intervention and I love it so much. But yeah, I think I'm Thai, Thai first. And I love like an athletic sports massage. I obviously, I do like to train quite a bit. So, but it's this bad little back from track. And I just need someone to get into these hips, lock in with their elbow and just rock my fucking world. - Yeah. - And oh my God, I love, I love a dry brush too. I love lymphatic massage. - I haven't done one of those yet. - So I had one of those earlier. You are, I mean, it's your body is T. - Yeah. - It's like, what do you want me to say? - I go to the now massage sometimes. - It was great, it was a great work. - There was a massage place in New York that I went to. And well, there's a place on West Forest Street that's famous. There's a woman who does massage their name May. And if you look them up, like every single review is just saying how like May changed their lives on Google reviews. - How have I not been? - I don't know, it's, she's like, so wonderful. - M-A-E, I believe. - Done. - And so, but I moved away from the West Village. So when I was in Brooklyn, I found a place and it was like a membership and you pay per month and you can go whatever three times. But I went in, it was a 60-minute massage and they started 10 minutes after and then they finished five minutes early. And I was like, can we talk about, 'cause that's not 60 minutes and she was like, well, we give you 10 minutes to change out of your clothes and five minutes to get dressed at the end. - When you were in a corset, like a full dress. - I was corseted. - That's a three piece. - I was wearing two corsets, one on top, one on bottom. And she just said, like, we just want to make sure you have time to get out of that. And so I was like. - So you had a garter on. - I was just like, you know what? Like, I don't want to pay that much for a 45-minute massage. It's just not 60 minutes. And like, if you want to call it a 45-minute massage and if that's what I thought I was paying for, like totally valid, totally valid. But to call it 60 and you're shaving 15 minutes off the top. I mean, I can't do math, but like, that's a percentage. - As a people pleaser. - As a people pleaser, I'd go, best massage. - I just said, I'm gonna cancel my membership, but like, I'm sure plenty of people go and they are fine with that timetable. It just wasn't for me. I will say what I love about this is that you, you set your boundaries, you knew what you wanted. My thing is I, for so long, I wouldn't be vocal if they start and I did want harder. Or I've only said it a couple of times, but maybe a little softer. - Speak up it challenge. - Speak up it challenge and you might be complacent. - You might be convinced it. - You're sitting through that massage. - I have started physical therapy at this place in Midtown where they do body work because I have a bad shoulder and my hands were really hurting from holding my phone. And I just thought it's been five years. I've been to PT before, nothing was helping. I've done the exercises. So I go to this new place where they do body work. So he is really getting in there. - What could be better? - And like, he fixed me. My shoulder still flares up quite a bit, but my hands are like better. And he was like, you sleep on your stomach. That's the problem. 'Cause my neck was getting stiff at night. So I have had to completely change my sleep style, which was all my stomach for 34 years of my life. And so now I have to back inside sleep, but it has like totally changed my life. - I don't know if you can tell. I'm in a much better mood lately. - Yeah, no one. - And you had it early mentioned. - I've definitely noticed. There's been a shift for sure. No, that makes me so happy because I do think that these things can heal. Like I, as I get more massage, like as like my body is, is being less tense and I drink a ton of water after I have to face. - It's matter. - You have to drink a ton of water and do an Epson salt soak. Oh my God, you'll just feel like a million bucks. You'll have the best. - Well, you soak in two inches of water. I'm sorry, Ellie is always in a drought. - You're so hurtful to me. - You make up for what the Kardashians do at their lawns with your two-inch bathwater. - Well, that's a big thing, yeah. But so, okay, I will tell this story and I'm laughing about it, but I know that it's like a slightly triggering thing, but it did happen and I just. - You were assaulted. - So I was assaulted at a massage parlor once, but here's the thing. I think research all the places before you go and be really thoughtful. That's why I'm telling you, Ty, on Hillhurst, that if you're in LA, that's a great one to go to. Definitely find out who's rubbing you down in a dark room for an hour, I think is important. But I do just have to laugh because the thing, and we might have to cut this, but I kind of just like this is what happened. - It's your story. - And it's hard not to just totally laugh at it now because so I'm getting this massage and this guy's like, okay, great. Yeah, I mean, it's kind of easier without the blanket and I'm like, no, I don't think it is. Also, I never get fully naked. It's like, I don't, I'm not in my house. - I do sometimes. - Sometimes I get that. If I'm like, if I know the person, like we've been there, but if I'm just like hopping into a place, which this was like very drive-by vibes, like I was just popping in, which is not always like, I don't know. I wouldn't necessarily recommend it. - Hey, but it's not your fault. What happened to you is not your fault. - Thank you, sweetie. And this one thing happened though, where I was oiled down and then all of a sudden, the guy just goes and just slaps my ass. - It did jiggle. I'll just be totally real. So I assume he got what he did. - When he said this is easier without the blanket, he meant slapping her ass. - Yeah, no, I think so. Then he said he was like bubble butt. And I was like, oh, okay. I think. - Thank you so much. - Yeah, I was like, no, and thank you for saying that. I did like laugh in the moment because I felt so uncomfortable. - That's very uncomfortable. And I was like, oh, and also I'm totally good now. Like I have to go. - Okay, so you executed yourself. - I did, yeah, I mean, which was so sad. Like I wanted the rest of the massage, but I will say like he didn't have the stones. Like the real stones, which I like the hot rocks on my back, but also like it wasn't to the level. Where did I get that from? Is that Bethany Frankel? Or she's like, it's not at the level. Maybe. Who knows what just comes through, you know? - You're a vessel. - Yeah, I'm sad this happened, but I guess I serve as a warning to everyone. Research the places you go into. - No, you're right. - 'Cause I guess finding out later, this was a place that people frequented. - Okay, to get fingered and stuff. - Fingered, blessed. - Yeah, to have a finger of the booty as bitch. - He should have asked first. 'Cause that's just like, yeah. - That's just the thing you can quickly just check in on. - Totally. - Before you start to do that. - Yeah, it's just crazy to then sit back in your car and like you just got your ass water and you're kind of covered in hot oil. - And your clothes. - And you're getting all wet. - Yeah, that's like, I didn't get the hot towel to kind of get it all on my body. - You just kind of fled, and you fled the scene. - Yeah, but back to the good. Hey, and I just. - We don't want anyone walking into a situation. - Exactly, I don't want to be like. - That's the last thing we would want. - Yeah, because then I know you'll tweet, "Benny drama told me to get a massage." - And now it's your fault. - Yeah, and I've got to take you to court. - And I've got to put my handprints on this ass. - I have found, sometimes lately, I'm like, I don't want to recommend certain things. Like I was gonna ride for like going on vacation alone, but like I actually can't advise anyone to do that. - No. - I just think like sometimes just know that there are certain things you ride for where we're like, but we don't want to put our girls in a situation. - There's like, obviously, all of this is at your own responsibility. I'd say, namely, icebreakers, ice cubes. - Sure, yeah. - If you're gonna play fast and listen to those things, it's not on us. - It's on you. - We recommend you use it as it's instructed. - As it's intended, yeah. - As it's intended, I said, put foreign my mouth, I actually take that back. - But you said that's what you do. That's not saying that that's what anyone else. - But we do, they're gonna hear that. They're gonna want to be just saying it. - They're daddy. - But yeah, Massage has really helped me. And I really, it's such a great way, like as I enter the writer's room and I'm hunched over and I'm in this library writing, what could be like the next great American record? I'm thinking to myself every now and then going for a little massage. I will say there's a great one on Bedford Avenue. I wish I had the name of it, but you can go. - Oh, right, by your old place. - I loved it. Oh my god, it was so amazing. - Yeah, I guess if you don't live in New York Rally, we got nothing for you in the way of Massage. Well, I see me. just can't get one, right? - Yeah, I don't think they have. - They don't have them. - I would love the chairs ones too. If you ever just want to be completely embarrassed, I would say the deepest embarrassment you can feel is get one of those publicly at an airport. I thought they were my friends, like at all. - Or a gay guy night. - My God, again, I just-- - It all comes back around. - I live my truth, period. - I think it's wonderful, I'll be safe out there. So, okay, this happened to me. I-- - I hate, so to go from that is what you just said, but this is actually kind of funny, because obviously you know I'll take a gay guy over a straight guy any day of the week. - Of course. - But when I ask for a male masseuse and someone flamer comes up to me, it's limp, wrists, it's not what I meant. - You go, I said I wanted hands on me. Also, yeah, it's funny. I don't really have preference. It can be anyone. But sometimes when it's time massage and it's a man, I am like, holy fuck. - Yeah, they're gonna rock your shit. - I'm like, you need to hold those poles 'cause you're gonna rock your shit. - You're gonna break my back. - Yeah, massages are one of those things where it's like, you know, that phrase that it's like pizza is like sex, like when it's good, it's really good and when it's bad, it's still pretty good. - Yeah. - Well, with massage, it's like the opposite. It's like when it's good, it's really good and when it's bad, like you could get injured. - You could get injured and also the worst is when it's just like, it's just not-- - It's nothing. - It's like tickly and you know that like, like I'm there for a service. Do you get me? - I'm there to get my shit rocked. - And what are you doing at then? You're tipping. I know you're tipping. - Sweetie. - You got to tip. - Don't be crass. - You got to tip. - 25% be for real. - Yeah. I tip my waxer 25% as well, because it's just like, you saw that, you saw all that. - Yeah, to me, I'm like, you just took care of me and you made me feel really good. - Yeah. - Thank you so much. Like, what an incredible skill. I love asking, like, did your family ask for these all the time and every time, every masseuse is like, kind of no. Like sometimes like my partner was like-- - If I was married to a physical therapist or a masseuse, I'm like-- - You're like this at dinner. - Give it to me, baby. - In many ways, I think for you, massage acts as a form of medicine, which is what I would like to talk about today. So I have a joke about medicine in my hour. I'm not gonna do it right now, but I obviously have deep ties to the medical industry, medical practice, and medicine with my dad being a doctor and my mom being a nurse. So I've long believed in the power of medicine. I think Eastern or Western, it's sort of whatever works for you. I would definitely say I'm more whatever the one is that we do in America. I don't know what direction is. - I'm like, well, I'm not showing the juice. - It's hitting the cracker sandwich. - It's just at home. - I think we do Eastern medicine, but I'm not sure. - I believe. - I don't know. - Ooh. - I'm not sure. - This could end right now. - This could end right. Basically, pharmaceuticals. - Every day in my garden. - I think there's types of medicine. There's types of healing. There's like, you know, I think going to therapy is a type of medicine for me. Working out is a type of medicine. But today, I want to talk about pharmaceuticals and the ones that work for you. It's like, it's so cool when you are sick or you have a problem and you literally, there isn't medicine that's like made for what you're going through. - I mean, it's topical. - I mean, how cool is science? - And it is a topical. - How cool is science? - It's incredible. - Okay, penicillin is so fucking cool. And I used to get strep throat all the time as a kid. You know, you get that little syrupy thing. - That's such a thing. - I had a pacifier, so I was bored. So it's covered in germs. - Yeah. - My poor sister, her sons get home from school and they're like, okay, new virus to straw. - Yeah, new virus to straw. - Yeah. - Yeah, I gotta give it to mom. - His school is a peachy dish, ear infections. - Ear infections. I remember one, locked my shit up as a kid. Like I was watching out of the box and I was like, girl, I'm sick. - 'Cause you're home sick. - I'm like, I'm actually tripping. - Yeah, I got pink eye as a child. I got really bad pink eye. That, I mean, unfortunately I did have to get held down by two of my cousins and they had to put the drops in 'cause I just hated it so much. Also, when I would go to the doctor, I hated getting shots. So one time my sister Pam had to take me and so I was like, oh, easy. Like my mom's not here. I'm not getting a shot today. Like I'm gonna get out of this. I put my hands in the shirt, you know? I went like this and I was like, you're not gonna do it. - Oh, of course. - You're not gonna do it. - Yeah, I mean, I was like screaming crying. Also, one time my mom was taking me and Greg and Tom, so my siblings close to me and age to the pediatrician but she didn't want me to know. Or she didn't want me to know what we were going for. And then the car, Tom goes, are we all getting shots? Or just me and Greg and my mom looked back at him. Death stare. She was way to spill the beans. Obviously, we were all getting shots. But if she had told me before, I would have handcuffed myself to the house. - Yeah, of course. - So I would have never been in that car. But now I understand that it was all to help me. I think unfortunately right now we live in a society where Florida is removing vaccine mandates. And more and more people are opting out of vaccinating their children. I think there's like, if the rates are just going down, measles are spreading. - Sorry, that is just-- - People are gonna die. - I'm sorry. The measles spreading, I'm just like, oh my god. Also, you're like putting other people at risk. - Other people at risk that maybe can't get the vaccine for medical reasons. - I know, it's so demonic. - And so I just think like it's insane to me that we would rebuke science and say like, hey, we have this thing that's gonna make our lives better and make the world safer. And we're gonna not do that anymore. Like, I'm waiting for like Republicans to be like, we're outlying seatbelts. It's like, how many people do you want to die because of your policies? It seems like anything that makes sense and makes people safer. They just want to completely do away with for some reason. So I'm just like, please trust the medicine. - What's the logic there? I mean, I guess I'm just like the maha of it all. I am just kind of like, what's the-- - They've convinced people, vulnerable people, that vaccines cause autism. - Yes, which I-- - Which isn't true. - Yes. - And it's very dangerous to spread lies like that. - But what is the, I guess what is the motive? - I don't know, that I don't know. - Because to me I'm trying to figure it out. And I'm like, but I would definitely think like it was kind of on both sides, like an agenda, you know, big pharma, like I'm kind of thinking like, wouldn't that like-- - No, it's confusing. - For like, funding, for campaigns, I know my big thing with the coal dial. - I know. - That's what-- - I don't-- - Loki maha of me though. - No, it kind of is. - I'm taking it all back. - I now know why there's not. - I don't know what the goal is. I don't know. I guess in some people think, 'cause of the propaganda, they've been served that it makes like shampoo, the chemicals and shampoos and stuff like give kids like other problems. - Oh, this drives me crazy. Clean beauty has really come into the space and kind of scared people of some of these chemicals that like just are preservatives. - Yeah. - And it's like actually pretty chill. - Yeah, it's like, I would say that our culture is built right now on like absolute fear, in every category. - Fear, every category. - Here's the thing. When I have a UTI, I go to the doctor. They have a solution for that. When I have dermatitis, I go to the doctor. - Are you looking around? - There's a solution for that. When I have BV, it's like all these medical breakthroughs that help keep us healthy, especially as women and like preventative care, which we're gonna talk about next week. - Yeah. - It's really scary. And I just like, I'm so thankful that we have scientists and doctors who dedicate their lives to researching. - Mom and dad. - And my parents, and that's how they met. They met at their emergency room at St. Vincent's. - She gave me a shot in the butt. - And she gave my dad a shot in the butt. - She said, "Shit, I know you were caked up like that." - She was like, "Wait a minute, hey." - She said, "Fuck, you're kind of fucking caked up." - No, the real story is that they were pumping someone's stomach. My mom was pumping someone's stomach. And my dad came up and asked her on a date. - In the middle, that guy died. - Yeah, well yeah, she was so excited about the date. - She was like, "Oh my God, he finally died." - She said, "He is." - Wait, this is so crazy because I just visited a friend who had a really bad stomach problem and was having such intense stomach issues and with her eating. And then she went to the doctor, she got put on the antibiotic, which I think, I think everything in moderation in a way, like I know sometimes people will just do so many antibiotics. - Yeah, or the fact that we get ads for medicines, I do think we're probably over-medicated in this country. I mean, I think that's like factual. - Yes, we do. - But I'm obviously not advocating for going to your doctor with a laundry list of medicines that you want to get on. What I'm saying is that I love when there is something that is solvable and fixable and you can go to the doctor, get a prescription and then it goes away. That's what I'm saying. - And this is what happened to her. She went on antibiotics and she was thought the wash she was doing it 'cause obviously with bacteria, sometimes you kill all the good bacteria, it's the whole thing. She is like, she said, it's completely gone. She just feels fantastic. It's so crazy that not everyone in this country can have that. - I know. - And I really think that is so deeply detestable. - Health privilege. - Health privilege is. - The disparity is gonna get bigger too, 'cause even now after this big, quote unquote, big, beautiful bill, there's hospitals closing, there's emergency rooms closing, there's trauma centers closing, people are gonna have to travel further to get care. And so already on a system that was like very overburdened. Now it's just gonna get even worse. And so it's really scary and I think we have a lot to fix in our country. I mean, you can say what you want about the UK, but they do have the National Health Services, the NHS. It's sobering to think about the people that don't have access to these things. I wish there was more we could do, other than just like voting and voting people out of office 'cause we can only do so much. - So we're gonna do it. - We're gonna do it. - We don't understand. - We're gonna do it. And I just, as someone that's on Doxycycler right now, 'cause I have a little dermatitis, I'm just thankful. I'm grateful, it's gratitude. And we come back to gratitude a lot on this podcast. - And gratitude, I do. - And gratitude. We're always mentioning both. - I, I'm on a prescription right now. I don't wanna talk about it yet, but it is working for my dermatitis. I just don't wanna say this and then everyone rush to the hospital. - Yeah. - So I don't want the hospitals over so. - The hospitals are already overfying. - Yeah, I do. - You can't take that right now. - That's really good. - What did Benny draw my side? Yeah, let's see if this really does work, but I went to a doctor and they took really good care of me and I went to an allergist. They also took really good care of me. And I'm probably gonna go to a dentist next week. Fuck it. - Oh my god, I love the dentist. - I, yeah, I mean, I had so many cavities as a kid. So I think there's a lot of trauma associated with that. But my parents used to joke that they should have a statue of me there because I paid for it. - You paid for it, baby. - Yeah, and I agree. There's something so special when you find a doctor that you really like and you really, like, fuck with their energy because their doctors are like every other profession. There's gonna be better ones than others. There's gonna be ones that make you uncomfortable. My kind ofologist is a man and he's a little like crass. But like, I kind of appreciate it. It feels very honest to me. - My brain went to just the dentist. - Disgusting things. - Like a pussy. - Yeah, so he does a lot of pussy jokes. - Well, he does a lot of, he does the mask. Jim Carey's very good from the mask. - Oh, he painted space green everyday. - When he's putting a specular inside me, he goes, "Somebody stop me." - Yeah. - It's really weird. - It's fun. It's fun for him to do the bit and it shows you out. - And please just go in for your checkups if you are able and my goodness, we just need to keep all the people on the right side of history. We need to keep them safe. We're already having less babies. I haven't fact checked this, but my brother who I really trusted say, "Yeah, Republicans are having more kids than they would and Democrats are having less." So that doesn't bode well for sort of our future. - You know what you are, Benny? - I f*** it. - Your words not mine. Babe, you're my rider, die. - Ride or die? - Well on that note, this has been so great in the line. - Let's get into rider, die. - Yeah, let's get into that one. - I mean, how am I not gonna be like, you know, talking about serious stuff in this room? It's so distinguished. - Of course, sweetie, and you are distinguished. I feel like Mr. Rogers in here. - Yeah, I started the Mr. Rogers movie on the plane the other night. - I'm sure it's amazing. - It was so different than what I thought. So I need to get back into it. It just wasn't what I was expecting, but I will finish it. - Mr. Rogers always said expect the unexpected. - Expect it much like Shania Twain. - Exactly. - In the letter that she wrote to her friend that f***ed her husband, her current husband, she said expect the unexpected. - She kind of wrote for that too, in a lot of ways. - When she then married that woman's husband. - Yeah, that's a mini ride, say a big part for her. - I mean, yeah. So we will get into rider, die. I love massage. Whenever I think to go get one, obviously you have to like live within your means and whatever, whatever. I mean, how many disclaimers can we do on one episode? - I know, you just, you get this one life, go treat yourself and get a massage. - I know, I know. - And also, it's a really great gift. - It's such a good gift. Oh my God, when an amazing thing to get like your parent, your lover, your friend, who's going through it. - So your friend who's going through it. - Remember that day where I said, let's just go get massages. - Yeah. - Yeah. - Mom, I was happy to introduce you to my friends. - And you treated me and that was wonderful. - It was fabulous. - I do think like it's hit or miss, and you have to just, it's sort of like with dating. It's like, you know, some masseuses aren't gonna be a good match for you. And that's okay. - I love you, you look so cute today. - Thanks. - You're right for medicine, of course. I think medicine is incredible. Medicine can heal. Medicine can help. Medicine is, it's us in a lot of ways. I hope you're my medicine in a lot of ways. - What did Devon say to us last night at the restaurant? She said, I dumped my antidepressants down the toilet 'cause I found ride. - And we said, Devon, no, don't do that, baby. - Devon, no, please be careful. - I have to be so bad. I think we just have to stop or else I will just kind of piss myself in the same way. - That's the episode. - And a London can't see me like that. - But I really do ride from medicine. And once this really locks in, you guys, and just I get a couple more months. - Yeah, I'll be writing some scripts. Let's just say that. Drama and D might love. - I can't wait. The doctor will see you now. - To all the boys I've rimmed before. - Oh, my accent. - Any babe, eyes in the road. There you go. (dramatic music) - Ride, ride. - Please note that this episode may contain paid endorsements and advertisements for products and services. Individuals on the show may have a direct or indirect financial interest in products or services referred to in this episode.