Geena Davis

Welcome. Welcome. Welcome to Armchair expert. I'm Dak Shepherd. I'm joined by Monica Padman. Hi. Hello. Today we have an icon Gina Davis. She is an Academy award-winning actor, Felma and Louise, a league of their own, Beetlejuice. Long kiss, good night. The fly. Legends. Sometimes we get legends in here. It's pretty cool. Oh, I loved her. Please enjoy Gina Davis. What's looking for the seatbelt? Oh, you were. Interesting. You were because you think this is going to be a wild ride. I've been flying a lot lately. It's just muscle memory. That's really sweet. You really did just go for your seatbelt. Yeah. Who knows what's going to happen. I'm just renting. Just live in Palo Sades, moved before all of that. Unfortunately, that house went. And then I rented a place in Venice for two years. Then I gave up the lease on that because I had to go to New Mexico. New Mexico. To shoot a series. And then just as I was going to come back, I thought it would be so easy to find. The fire has happened right when I was coming back. And so everyone was renting up everything. So everything was gone. I ended up in a guest house in the backyard of some nice Armenian people in Glendale. Wait, hold on. You were in someone's guest house. Guest house. And were they aware that Gina Davis was their tenant? Well, it was funny. My assistant booked it in her name. And then I came to meet them. And she said, it's actually her. And I said, by the way, maybe don't talk about that. I'm living here. Don't tell the neighbors. Yeah. Yeah. Just don't bring it up. And they said, why? What do you mean? They're like, bring what up? Bring what up? Okay. What are they? Are they first? Are they new to the country? That accents. So they might have moved here. Okay. They weren't totally dialed in American calls. But here's the best for it. So I asked not to talk about me. And they said, oh, oh, he also lives in this neighborhood. The guy who's the fifth billing on Brooklyn 9.9 lives, and then that one lives over here. And I'm like, so I was just talking about, okay, I'm doing exactly what you just did. I pray maybe you don't do. Yeah. So that's what I don't want you to do. There's kind of a sweet naïveness to it. They're like, perhaps in his mind, he was like, good news. There's more of you on this block. You could get together and have coffee. It's about whatever you guys talk about. People will probably want to get it. Yeah. It's about art and stuff. It's a very classy block. There's a lot of celebrity. How long were you there? About eight months. Eight months. Okay. So certainly I know you do Massachusetts, New York, Sweden. Where did you spend the bulk of your time? What cities? Were you in LA a lot? I moved here. In '83 and I've been here ever since. Oh, you were in New York for any of that? No. Right after college, I went to New York because my whole class was going to New York. I studied acting. Yes. And they all wanted to do plays. I knew I wanted to do movies in TV, but nobody told me, well, you know, you should actually go to LA instead. So I went to New York and I was like, how am I supposed to get out of the movie? Yeah. Yeah. They don't make a ton there. And then I did. Your town in Massachusetts that you grew up in is 300. And I did the math yesterday. It's like 312 years old. Yes. That's impossible to be in America in a town that's 300 plus years old. Right. And I was in, they had a parade for the Cessque Centennial, which was 250th anniversary, which the country is having back in the 80s. I was the parade marshal. My parents that I dressed in costumes from the era, my dad grew up much. Tell me stuff. Tell me stuff. Yes. How close were you to Plymouth Rock? 20 minutes. Oh, wow. That's so cool. Okay. It's also where, where, where, where, ham? Where ham. It's also the gateway to Cape Cod, right? I just asked someone this the other day who grew up in a tourist town. But when I think of certainly it would swell in the summer, right? The amount of people that were in your town? Or did they just pass through? They passed through. Because it wasn't on the Cape. It's right before the Cape. But you must pass through it to get to my cave. Then this wasn't apply. I'm like every time I was somewhere for duration, like go to Northern Michigan in the summer, I would fall in love with the girl there. And then I'd have to return home. And then I just imagined that girl fall in love every year with someone that was out of town. Like that seems right for a lot of long distance relationships. Well, I never had a boyfriend till I left town. You didn't have one all through high school? No. That would shock people. But I've read enough about you that I know why it's not shocking. 348 years. That's what it was. 1678. That was crazy. That's crazy. That's crazy. Yeah. 340. It's nuts. So your mother was a teacher's assistant? Sometimes. Did she have a college education? No. She was born in 1919, I think? Yes, that's right. Wow. Incredible. Really. Now, my kids make fun of us. They say you guys are from the 1900s. And I'm like, oh, wow, that is true. And that sounds really funny. I shouldn't have them. It does. But back in the 1900s. But what kind of mom was mom? Fabulous mom. She grew all of our produce. She had an acre size yard. She grew so much that she would sometimes sell to the local little store strawberries and stuff to them. Did she can? Can't. Oh my God. Yeah. Both my parents grew up rather poor. Me from one and so every piece of foil got saved. I'm not sure they bought a second roll, actually. Yeah. Just use what we had. They were very, very careful about it. It would have been little kids in the Great Depression, right? Yeah. Yeah. That'll seer into your consciousness. Absolutely. And dad was a civil engineer with the Corps of Engineers. Oh, like the Army Corps? Yes. Yes. His unit was in charge of maintaining the canal, surveying it and maintaining it. And then he got assigned to go all up and down the coast. These coasts to survey waterways and things. And you were what kind of kid? You were shy? I was very shy. And it seemed like every time I wasn't and burst out of my shell. Somebody would say, Oh, no, no, no, no, no, go back into your shell. That's too much. You had a little gap in your paper route, right? And then this little gap on your bike whether or not watching you just let it rip and sing at the top of your lungs, but you'd get busted. It was my house and a few other houses and there was a long hill where there weren't houses. And there was a creek that went there. And first of all, I was very superstitious at the time. So I had to find sticks on the ground in the shape of a Y, which meant yes, you can keep going. And if I found one in the shape of a V, that meant very good to keep going. Oh, you made it very good. Right. Right. What if you didn't find any sticks? You just stood there? Look around. You know, you'll find what you're looking for. That's true. Manifesto. The people up the hill, you know, most of them were older and they wanted their paper. They come out and say, where is she? They looked down the hill and then they'd call my mother and say, I think something's wrong with your daughter. She's at it again wandering around and not bringing the paper. She's staring at the ground. We might call that a little OCD tendency now. Yes. And I'm so not superstitious now. Yeah. What's it ever? But I think I was worried about things. That was right. I feel better. And you were very self conscious about being tall. I was the tallest kid in class period throughout yeah, from minute one. Okay. So let's get into the compulsive behavior because I had a ton of it. I had a bunch of ticks. It's so many ticks. And then I did so many things to prevent bad luck. Right. Like I had to do every single thing twice. I had all these bizarre rituals. I had to take the toilet paper and leave the bathroom and touch the wall and come back in. But I had to do that. Twice, I was afraid so I wouldn't see. What about toilet paper? Jesus. For whatever reason, at some point at eight years old while going to the bathroom, I was like, if I don't take the toilet paper and string it all the way to the hallway and touch the wall, then come back in. But I have to do that twice or it's bad luck. Then go again, pray nobody in my house sees me because I know it's madness. Yeah. And I just had a million things I was so busy with. Did you have any of that kind of stuff? Well, what I was very busy with was monsters in the house. And then I'll talk about the outside monsters. But there weren't just monsters in the closet or under the bed, which of course I had. Those are standard. Right. The worst one was I could read your mind. And so when I was in bed, I had to think that I was somewhere else so that it would go there to look for me and get me. So I'd be thinking, here I am in the kitchen, here I am in the kitchen. And I'm having crackers. If we get exhausting, I hope it doesn't realize I'm actually in bed. Get up and spring out of bed. And then I say, yes, I am in the bed. I'm in the bed. I'm in the bed. You're trying to teleport your consciousness to deceive the monster. And what's great is the monster is so skilled that can read your mind, but it can also be tricked very easily. Right. Yeah. That's the logic of a young person. And it can't see clearly clearly or it would just observe you. Right. I didn't ever really think about that. Oh, none of these things make sense if you try to unravel why. Like the whole evenness thing, did you have that at all? Evenness. Like you scuff your left heel walking to school. And then you just become neuroticly obsessed with like, well, I have to make it a scuff on this side or it's in balance. I didn't have that kind of thing. You didn't have any in the balance scene or I have to touch things. I didn't have. No touching. Yeah. Did you have a visual of the monster? Like, did you know what it looked like? That one was invisible and the other ones were corporeal, but I didn't think too much about how they actually looked, but that they would have grabby hands. But there was one. They're very grabby. They're hands-y. They want to pinch you. I had to vault into the bed from very far away. Of course. Yes. But there was one outside that was an enormous colossus giant. And if you could see the horizon, it was just below that. And if I did something wrong, it would take one step towards me. So I would look at the horizon and waiting to see the top of its head. Is your current explanation of all this? Mine is easy. I had a stepdad that arrived in my life. He was an addict and he was violent. And then all these things took off, right? All these OCD-type things. Which someone is like, oh yeah, when your environment is very uncontrolled, you try to control things. Great. That makes sense. Right. Do you have an explanation? Is yours genetic or was there something nurture going on that you had a hunch? I think there was kind of something about that you have to be perfect. Dad was a deacon as well as a civil engineer. Yeah. I mean, they were very involved with the church. He and I also sang in the church choir. You played the organ for the young people's service. So there was this huge fear that you would be not good. Yes. I hate that. Don't you fucking hate that? Yeah. Like I got in a debate with my mother-in-law. I'm like, look, I get it. You want to introduce the kids to your religion? That is your right. I wish you well. I do ask you to not introduce this concept of hell and sin to these little brains. I don't think that's a healthy concept. No. Exactly. More than religion, it was sort of maybe a New Englandy kind of thing where you had a help, help, help everybody you ever could. But take nothing. It was to the extreme where if somebody was handing me something, we'd hear we'd just like to have some ice cream or a glass of water. Don't think. No, thank you. Easy to be at a girlfriend's house and you like smell the chicken and garlic cooking and you wanted it. Yes. You invited you to eat and you said no. I said no. Thank for like her mom knew about my mom. She called and said, Lucille, she needs having dinner with us. No. She is. Yeah. Oh, no, no, no. You can't say yes because it's too much trouble. You don't want to be a burden. Yeah. Colitis. What do you think that came from in them? I don't know. But they definitely both had this thing where you had to be the politeest person. Not only polite, but just incredibly self-sacrificing. Perfect way to be was absolutely no need. But I'm going to give you everything. Self-sufficient and very generous. Yeah. That's tough. Yeah. How did that play out with like friendships? Did people think you were over the top of that or was it standard enough ethos in that area? You know, my only close friend was Lucian who lived across the street and who I saw been played with every day. But for some reason, the other kids, I was friendly with everybody in school, but I didn't get invited to people's houses, which was weird. It was one time when I was already driving. I already had my license. And the cool boy from class called and said, "Hey, few people are gathering at my house. Would you like to come?" And I, "Oh, hold on." I was like, "That's fine. It's fine happening. It's fine happening." I'm a junior high school student, but I went and followed my dad and said, "Can I take the car? Why?" And I hit the car over to friends house and they said, "But it's nine o'clock." I said, "That's okay." And they said, "Don't do nobody goes out at nine o'clock. No, it's too late." "No." "Dad." But what if I left at seven? I'd still stay there until 11, so they would say, "No, no." And I had to go back and say, "No." "I'm sorry. I can't come." And then I never got a pass. "No." "No." That was my one chance. "That's awful." So did you resent them? For parents, I probably didn't really grasp it as well as I do know what was going on. I mean, I resented the hell out of not being able to live your life, yeah. I know you went and studied in Sweden for a year in high school. Is it because you knew everyone was so tall there? Do you think that was in the mix? No. But that was interesting. I didn't know that. I found it out. Yeah. You got there and you were completely normal, right? I'm completely normal. I started this foreign exchange program when I was in junior. And the second I heard about it, I want to go. And I think it was that I somehow knew I could reinvent myself. They wouldn't know I was a geeky kid who didn't have a boyfriend. That's how it turned out. They would kept saying, "You must have been so popular." Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Had you taken any Swedish priors? No. I don't know what the plan was or how this ever happened. But I got to Sweden without knowing how to speak one word of it and I started high school today's late. Oh my god. Really? I show up at the school and they say, "So, this is going to help you to your classes today." And I'm in the first class and I'm like, "Hang on. It's in Swedish." Yeah. How is this supposed to work? Yeah. Are you going to learn anything? I went up to the teacher afterwards and of course they all do don't know how to speak with. I said, "Do you know what I'm supposed to do?" It's just said, "I don't know. I've been thinking about it because I can't teach the class in English. So I started. I'd ask somebody what was the homework and I'd take the book home and I'd look up every single word in the dictionary so I would translate the entire homework. But I learned it fast." That's how the signs all of this one. They call that like clearing words. Really? You have to read everything with a dictionary next to you. And then they believe that the basis of all misunderstanding is that people misunderstand a word and then continue on and they build all this stuff on top of a misunderstanding. So you're obligated. Wow. I've worked with lots of scientists and I've watched someone doing the clearing words thing and I was like, "What's going on here?" Wow. Yeah. So you could have invented your own religion and you just missed the opportunity. What was the family like that you were living with? They were conservative. I would say they were pretty strict. There was a bummer you left one convenient environment for another. You needed to go to the scars guard family. Oh, exactly. Yes. They're like naked walking around. Yeah. I was going to say they were always naked and having wine. Oh, yes. Dancing. Well, the older girl, their daughter had a boyfriend who slept over. Yeah. That was standard, right? Absolutely. And I was like, "What?" I'm sure they felt very responsible for that. But you know, the last you did fall in love there. I did. What was the name? Mats. Mats. Mats. That was a trip to Amsterdam and I hadn't even really noticed him before in my class. But we started to hang out and he was gorgeous and blonde. That's all he was eating. Taller than me. So that was like unbelievable. And his family adopted me. They were like, "Just come here." It may warrant strength. No. And they drank wine at dinner and I was like, "Oh my God. Wow." This is crazy. And then the dad had to go out of business trip one time. They said, "Would you like to come with us?" Oh my God. Yes. And the people said, "Yes." And they got a room for Mats and I. Wow. What a blessing. And you were like 13. We're older, right? 17. Oh my God. 17. 17. Oh my God. You maintained a pin-pale relationship? Yes. And my parents actually invited him to come visit us in the summer after I came home and he came for like a week. Had the magic fizzled out between? No. No. No. So summer was nice. Yeah. It was. Did you take him to Martha's Vineyard? And our home made camper. How did that end? They're hard. Long distance back then was like $1 a minute, right? It's really hard. So when you first got out of high school, you wanted to go to University of Austin. That didn't work out for one reason or another? I wasn't home in order to audition. I had an audition to get in the acting program. So I went to a college, New England college, which you didn't have to audition to become an acting major for the first year and then as soon as I could audition to go to be you. I did. You got an F in body movement, in movement class, which is sort of dance. But yes, because there were these assignments like you and your partner create a scene with three hits and a fall or something like that. And all the stuff that I came up with was so ridiculous that she would say very amusing. But again, not the assignment. Did you start gaining confidence in college? And is the transition from like, I'm an awkward duck till I know by the time we get to New York, we're ready to try modeling. So something has happened between those two. It was college. Yeah, it was because now, oh, I'm trying to myself be however I want to be. I actually became sort of goth, a lot of eyeliner and I pierced my own ears. Wow. You were a galling. It was your time to rebel. Oh, it's my time to rebel. Yeah. Okay. So when you get to New York, you start modeling. Did that require like your first time doing it? That's a big leap of confidence. You've kind of got to just, I think, fake it till you make it, maybe. I mean, does anyone feel like a sexy runway model? I don't know. Meaning like five or six of them and those are our supermodels, but it's an awkward endeavor initially, no? It very much felt like I was faking everything. In fact, I guess because I was taller than most models, I would get lot of bathing suit and underwear and panty, those kind of jobs. And I was actually a Victoria Secret one time. So I'm shooting all these photos in underwear, you know, very revealing. And then I go back to the dresser room to go home and put on my full. Big grandma. Big grandma underpants. And I told myself I just have figured out how to stand. That was all a trick, tricking them into thinking I'm attractive. I don't want to be too dramatic, but do you think you are able to disassociate? Yeah. Like, okay, we're going to walk out. We're going to act like we're a sex symbol. Right. Yeah. We know we're not. So we're just going to vacation. Well, that's happening. Exactly. I'm just going to pretend I'm all that. One story before we get to Tootsie. You were also working at Antaller. Yeah. Yeah. Go ahead. No, just great story. So imagine she's there in the 70s. I mean, I have to imagine this is a Peck's window display era of department stores. Yeah. Right. So you were working there. What happened? I was. I've sales girl at Antaller. We would dress like Antaller. Yeah. Style. So I was always made up and dressed up. So for the undergarments, which were enormous. I'm sorry. And one time the window display was a cafe table and two models were sitting at chairs and there was mannequin models and there was fake food. I don't know that, but there was one empty chair. And I kept looking at it and I said to one of my co-workers, "Dare me to go in the window." And she was like, "Yeah, do it. I had no idea what I was going to do, but I went and got in the chair." And people were walking by at that time and they were like, "What's she's doing?" And I got in the chair and I just. Oh, yeah. And pros. And they're like, "Oh, and they keep watching to find out what's going to happen." And then other people stopped and said, "What are you looking at?" They had missed you arriving. They said, "Just wait." Because they're like, "She's got to move it at some point." So I started moving, you know, like a robot occasionally. And they'd go, "Whoa, and then more people would come and say, "What are you all looking at? Just wait." Oh my god, you created like a whole scene. I created a whole thing. At some point, the manager of the store came over and said, "Gena, what are you doing? Get out of the window." And then she looked and saw this giant crowd outside and said, "Well, stay there." Oh, wow. They started hugging me every Saturday. No. For like five hours. She had five hours of sitting still. A little break every hour. I take like a five hour break. Wow. It's like an art installation. But I think even sitting dead still for 15 minutes would be far more growing than people would expect. Is it not hard? I learned. I had no idea that I had this talent, but I learned that I had a tremendous skill at being motionless and that I could go a very long time without blinking because they're all also waiting for me to blink. Oh, they're on. Yeah, yeah. I could go like at least five minutes or more without blinking. Then I blink and they go, "Did you ever consider rubbing a thin layer of Vaseline over your eyes so that they wouldn't need moisturizing? Like, maybe you could convince your eyes that they could stay up permanently." Well, that's why you're blinking to moisturize your eyes. No, no one wants to be a Vaseline. Of course not, but if you're committed to your craft. You can't be sure that would work. No, you'd have to try it. Then your eyes would probably fall down getting angry because it'd be blurry. I should have tried. But you know what? People would be looking, looking at me and one time somebody said, "It's not a mannequin. It has hair on its arms." I was like, okay, and I went home. You could hear them perfectly through the glass. I can never ask any of them. I would love to hear people talking about what I think I can hear. It's so funny. So from then on, I shaved my arms and I got a wig that looked like the other mannequins wig. Wow. This is the reverse of the movie mannequin, where a mannequin becomes a real life beautiful girl. You're a real life beautiful girl who became a mannequin. We got a mannequin. And then one time somebody said, "That's not a robot or anything. She's not plugged in." So the next time, I had a very subtle little cord disappearing. Wow. She's plugged in. This feels impossible, but your first audition is Tootsie. Yeah. Oh, my. I mean, that really is nuts. How did you get it? Because the role required his dressing roommate to be in our underwear a couple of times. So he'd be like, "What?" They called model agencies and said, "Do you have any models who know how to act?" And my Jesus knew that I didn't say, "We do have one." She's currently acting like a mannequin on this stage. And so they said, "Okay, so go. These are the lines and you're going to go to an audition. And if they like your audition, they want to see you in a bathing suit. So just wear a bathing suit under your clothes." So I did and I went to the audition and I read and it was just assistant to the casting director. The first rung on the ladder. She did the video and then didn't ask to see my bathing suit. So it just went completely out of my mind. Of course, my first time, nothing's going to happen. You flew to do a runway show, right? Yes, I went to Paris. I went to Paris. And I got booked for some of the runway shows and I was excited about that. And then got a message, Collier Agent, and they said, "You got the part." And I'm like, "What part?" "Tutsi." What? They said, "But you could stay and do the shows." And I was like, "Oh, I'm coming home. I got to get home." I didn't need to, but I really wish. I regret it. Sydney Boyle could sing your tape, right? He saw my tape when he said I really like her. Where's her underwear photo? And they said, "Oh, we forgot. We didn't do it." Well, get her back. Oh, turns out we can't. She's in Paris. Well, does they have any photos of her in a bathing suit? Oh, my God. The secrets. Lucky. And I'm trying to have some tons of like, definitely did. Yes, with everybody else in this office. What was your intimidation level? Because your scenes were immediately with Dustin. Yeah. And Dustin's already being heralded as like the second coming of Brando, right? I mean, he is like God at that time. Right. So yeah, what was your kind of anxiety level? As someone who trends high with anxiety? I get there the first day. The first scene I shoot is in my underwear with Dustin, but I was just like, this is what was supposed to happen. Yeah, you felt confident. As if it really happened that way. You felt fine. But I felt kind of fine. You think the modeling helped, but you kind of already crossed a really big bridge to do that. That's way more awkward than acting. Right. When I got to do the photoshoot for some, I'm like, Oh, gosh, I can't stand this. It's crazy. I act. No, that's true. And so we started shooting the scene and Dustin said they were so gracious and kind with me. And then on one of the takes Dustin accidentally ran into the door and I went over and said, Are you okay? We all right? So I literally add living. Yeah. So the public said, Hey, come here for a second. Why are you not nervous? And I said, am I supposed to be that? Oh, god. Yeah. It's like, yeah, no, it's good. It's great. But it's almost creepy. Well, it's a little bit creepy. You said, I mean, you're acting. You've seen what Dustin happened. You're in your underwear. And you seem just fine with it. Is it fair to say? Now, look, I've worked with really, really acclaimed actors that didn't have this ability. And then I've worked with really claimed actors where they have this ability, which is like, they're so good. They can just suck you into their bubble. Like do you think Dustin's ability helped you for that first role? Yeah. Dustin was incredible with me and immediately decided that I was going to have a career and just took me under his wing all day long tips and advice. And the second day, he said, Come with me at lunch. I'm going to take you to daily's. I don't know what that was. And for the listener, daily's are when they used to shoot on film. They go process all the film. Then you'd come back and watch it all in the theater unedited. Right. And it's typically just for department heads and whatever to see was the mic in the camera. Is the hair reading weird in the sliding. And so it was a little surprised. Dustin brought me and he said, what's going on? He said, I'm going to teach her how to watch daily's. Yeah, because let's just add, actors are not invited to daily's. If you're not in Hoffman, you can go. Yes. So they were like, okay. So every time I did scenes, I got to go to daily's and he would talk through it and stuff. And he wanted me to learn how to use daily's as a tool. And so the idea was, let's say you think something you did, you had some intention and you hope it came across, well, go see the daily's as see if it did. Yeah. And if it didn't, you probably have some other scene where you could work on that aspect of the character. So that was incredible. Well, also you're like accumulating. I don't want to be a little illiterate and say that you accumulate tricks, but you do accumulate the things you're good at. And no one's great at everything. And some things are totally unexpected. Some you've been doing since your eight. And of course, it works. But also some of the things you were doing since your eight on film don't work. There's a lot to learn. There is. I was lucky. The first movie I ever did they invited us to daily's. Really? It was a mixed bag. Oh, were yourself conscious? Well, first of all, I was kind of believe I was on a screen. Yeah. I was just like, oh my god, because they're showing the daily's on a movie screen. And you're like, yes, yes. I'm like, this is happening. So maybe the first half of the time they went, I just couldn't believe I was in a movie. And then the last time I was like, we got to stop doing that, that, you know, yeah, like once the thrill of being in a movie wears off. Right. And you're like, oh, I could be doing a little better at this. Yeah. Or I could be not doing that. Yeah. Maybe I don't need to do so much. I think that's what you really learn a lot of times. Like, you don't need to be that busy. Yeah. Stay tuned for more armchair expert. If you dare, we are supported by all state. Checking all state first could save you. hundreds on car insurance. Not checking your gas gauge before hitting the road? You genuinely thought you could make it? You were wrong. That's a very long stretch of highway where you learned exactly how far fumes can take you. And it's enough for enough. Yeah, checking first is an excellent plan. So check all state first for an auto quote. It could save you hundreds. And for fast reliable help when you need it, add an all state roadside plan today. You're in good hands with all state. Potential savings vary insurance and roadside assistance plans are subject to terms conditions and availability insurance provided by all state North American insurance company Northbrook Illinois roadside assistance plans provided by all state motor club incorporated in all state affiliate. So that movie comes out. It's enormous. I think it gets nominated for 10 Academy Awards. Something outrageous like that big. Yeah. And how are you computing having gone from being a living model? A man I can't. A living man I can't to that moment. So I'm home visiting my folks at one point. And my best friend's mom comes over. She's talking to my mom. She says no one can believe somebody from where have is in a movie. Nobody can believe this. And my mom says, well, she studied acting in college. Yeah, with 13 other. Yeah. But I remember just my brother and I took them to see the movie. If it was a matinee, hardly anyone was there. The movie finishes we get in the car dead silence. Mom says, so what do I have for dinner tonight? Oh boy. I think it was because I had underwear. I know. I was going to ask how they're handling the underwear exposure. Well, double whammy. There's the underwear. But then there's also just the like we're a very pious low-poppy family. And you're a model. And now you're an actor. Then just almost have been quite threatening with how worldly you were getting. Maybe. Although my mom really latched on to me being an actor. And she one time said, your mole, I would pay if you want to have it removed if that would make any difference. And she also said, I've read that blonde actresses get more work. I would be happy to pay for you to get her. All terrible advice, but really. That's Gina Davis. Yeah. The intention was kind. It was. Yeah. It was. Okay. So at that time, I just immediately built a huge fantasy around this. Tell me if I'm right or wrong. Your husband at the time was a restaurant tour. So when I think of New York, I'm thinking of Billy Joel's big shot. Like going out to a lanes. The whole New York city, 19 and now it wasn't so thrilling and glamorous. It wasn't glamorous. It wasn't. No, no. What do you own pizza shops? He worked at various restaurants. But none of them are sceny ones. Nothing. You weren't seeing Billy Joel. Yeah, packed up in a corner. No, nothing like that. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I didn't do that. We're going to studio 54. No, although my agency had a Christmas party at studio 54 and they wanted to have models jump out of a giant present box. Sure. That would, you know, the walls would fall down and sing Jingle Bell Rock. Oh, wow. Yeah. Classic. Classic. A steam builder. Yeah. So because I could sing and do harmony, I was one of the, the other two were like pretty famous, but I got to do that. So we dressed in this skimpy little dresses, which had Jingle Bells tying together the sides. Pitchering like almost the Hugh Heffner bunny outfit in that world. Exactly. Okay, with some bells. Yeah, with some little bells added. What was your identity doing that you thought you were a wallflower in high school? But now you're quite beautiful in your own movies and lots of men probably are giving you a lot of attention. Are you integrating that into your identity? I think I still thought it was kind of a trick. Oh, I also thought because somebody happened to video me while we were in college and showed me the video and I was like, I'm kind of photogenic. In that instance, I am a track. If it's a photo or on screen. You made space for, there's a version where I'm beautiful, but it's only through a lens in this circumstance. I'll tell you my story. Okay, I have been embarrassingly vulnerable to female attention and approval my whole life because I had this big window. I was like, no girls are ever going to like me and I want a girl so bad. So did you have any of that where you just felt like that affection or approval held a weight that maybe otherwise it wouldn't have? I think so. Yeah. I was also very impressed if somebody took that dress. You were like surprised. I could like someone just because they liked me. Oh, me too. That's what I'm saying. Absolutely. Yeah. If they said I really like it, I said, I like you too. Yeah. Yeah. That's a tricky a tricky lane to it. Very tricky. Then you're just like at the mercy of luck. Well, I hope the right dude arrives in front of me and says I like you because I will like that person back. All you have to do is show interest in me. Yeah. Yeah. It's not knowing yourself. It's not knowing what you really like or what you want. Yeah. Also it just goes to show like what you think you're meaning when you're an adult. You just don't know people's childhoods. No, exactly. So again, anyone that's meaning you and you're in movies in your six feet tall and you're gorgeous. They're like, yeah, girls at every option or home. I'd be so lucky if she says hi to me back. Yeah. And then you're sitting there like, oh my gosh, you just want someone to say. I think this guy actually likes me so much. Yeah. Exactly. Okay. So then for the next few years after Tootsie, you start doing a bunch of television. You were in some of the greats. You were in Knight Rider, Frickin, Remington's Deal family ties. Now you were on Buffalo Bill for a year. I don't even know that show, but I was really excited to learn that you rode an episode of it. I did. So, Dabney Coleman was in Tootsie and I met him there. And then he was getting ready to do this sitcom Buffalo Bill and recommended me to play his assistant. And I flew out to LA and immediately got the part. And then I had an idea for an episode that heavily featured my character. Assistant Heavy. And I told one of the producer, producer writer about it. And he said, well, okay, write that. And I was like, no, I'm not, I don't know, I don't know. Well, write it. That was cool of them. Yes. So I started writing it and I thought, maybe this is good. And I wanted to show him. He said, I'm not reading it till it's done. So that forced me to finish it. And then with everybody tinkering with it, but yeah, we did it. Why? Was that so enormously rewarding to see an episode of television on air that you rode? Yes. Yeah, I'm shocked. You didn't get more addicted to that. I know because forever, I've wished that I could write a screenplay or something, but I don't know. Have you written? Oh, yeah. And I pride myself on it way more. Of course. Like when we're traveling and for meeting people who have no clue who either of us are and they say, what do you do? I'll always say writer. That's what I have the most pride in. I totally understood. Okay. I just have to ask you this one because this is my all time. It's a three-way tie, but it is number one. My all time comedies are raising Arizona, learning what disaster, and fletch. Oh boy. Yeah. Oh boy. I love your body, Larry. You're one of the guys who would come up to me. Do you, but yes, I would have been very thrilled. You were around. That's for sure. Right. What was that movie like? Well, I just watched the Chevy doc. Oh, did you watch that? I haven't. I didn't even know there was. I'd be so curious to hear from someone who did a movie with them. It's interesting most of people that I've had the conversation with, they didn't walk away with what I did. I get to tell you what I walked away with, which is like, he is a genius. He's deeply uncomfortable and he has this crazy wit and he acts out with it a lot and he's mean to people a lot, but I also don't know that he knows he's mean to people in the way that he clearly is mean to people. But at the end of the day, he is unhappy. He's uncomfortable and unhappy. So I have compassion for him. It's not like he was an asshole and he's having a blast. I think he's suffering the most. No, yeah. Was there any hints of that when you were doing flats? Well, you know, I had such a small part. I originally auditioned for the lead female character. Mrs. Stan Hope. Alan Stan hopes for you. We watched it a lot. Yeah. So many times I could do every line. I'm pretty sure they said you're not attractive enough to play that part. Oh, but we think you're so funny. We want you in the movie. And this was 85 where they would tell you. Yeah, that's crazy. I was so crazy. I was wearing my hair all curly and weird. Anyway, they said, Oh, there's this part of the more chief whose name is Larry, but we'll change it to a female for you. And I said, but I still want to be Larry. Yeah. It made it very memorable that you're a Larry. Yeah. But was he grouchy? Not at all. He was also at the peak. Everything was going his way at that moment. Yeah. And he might have really enjoyed that movie or something because he's seemed fun and funny and chill and great. Okay. So you did the movie Transylvania 6 5,000 and you met Jeff. Yes. Did you see them and things prior to that? Yes. Okay. Cause I think the flies my introduction to Jeff Goldblum. He's immediately a unicorn, right? He's so peculiar in the most fascinating way, fabulous way. And was he that way on Transylvania? Yes. Yeah. I was immediately smitten. You sounded like I'm just Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Sorry, Jeff. But yeah, yeah. We hit it off. It was pretty. I mean, yeah. Very. Off to the races. Okay, yeah. Then you do the fly. And the fly is a mega movie. What a movie. Really was. Yeah. David Croniver who wrote it also. You probably never saw the original fly, but it's goofy. It didn't mean to be. That was in that spell of weird monster movies, right? Weird monster movies. Swamp thing. And I wouldn't be surprised if Vincent Price was in it. And when the character turned into a fly, he had a human body in it, giant fly head. And then they showed the fly toward the end had his human head on it. But tiny. And he was like, help me. But then it gets eaten by a spider. This has to be a very joyful phase of your life. To meet someone you fall in love. He's a unicorn. And then you guys do three movies together. Yeah. Back to back to back. Yeah. Was there any stress or challenge to that or no? No, it was all fun. And in one, he's a fly at another one. He's an alien. First curls are easy. Yeah. It was kind of crazy. So the fly is huge. I guess I would have expected after to see you to have more movie type offers. Right. But it takes the fly. It kind of gets the ball rolling. And then they're kind of big breakthrough fruit. Well, that beetle, Jesus huge. What's it like working with Tim Burton? Oh, so great. I went to meet him to talk about being in the movie. And he's an illustrator too. You know, he used to do animation. And all the walls were covered with his drawings of what beetles just was going to look like. And it was fabulous. And I found out later that this happened that I said to him, I want to be in this movie because I get it. Get this movie. And he told me later that he wanted to hire me because he wanted at least somebody on the set who knew what the movie was. He was like, 'cause I sure don't. So that was great. Okay. Accidental tour is then kind of now everything changes. Because you get nominated. And then you win an Academy Award for that. You're pretty young still, yeah. I'm just like 32 or something. 32. Feels very young doing an Oscar nowadays. And what did you have to learn on that movie with William Hertz just kind of darkness? Actually. So for that movie, I hired an acting coach. I had studied acting, but I'd never worked with a coach. But I thought, well, this is so important. I don't want to mess it up. And he actually had heard what Bill is like to work with. So he was like, we're going to proof you from being drawn off track by the way he is. Because he did live at a dark place. I think all of it was kind of painful for him in some way. And so I was such a caretaker. People please are type. If he had been like that, and I had no idea it was going to be like that, all I would be trying to do is make him happy. Fix him up. You know, what can I do? So if he's unhappy, given your childhood, you would have likely interpreted this. Like, why have been bad? Because he doesn't like it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But I learned what to do if that happened. The coach said, if you say, oh, how are you? And he says, I'm terrible. Oh, you're going to say, I'm sorry to hear that. Okay. Just not get sucked into that. And it was really unnatural. Yeah. But I practiced it. And I was able to do that. Yeah. It's like very codependence teaching. Yeah, breaking. Right. Yeah. Insumers in therapy. All I want is immersion. Well, yeah, this is the kind of the theme of your memoir is basically like a lot of these roles have forced you to take on qualities that otherwise would have maybe been unattainable. Right. And that certainly feels like a really good one, not that you perfected it. But if I could have learned it 32, I'm currently learning it. I live with three women and it has occurred to me. I can't be affected by their emotions or this isn't going to work. Like, this will be untenable. If I'm upset every time they're upset and trying to figure out what I got to do to fix it, I'm going to die. But it's like taking that life experience and forcing me to learn that. So I would have loved to have learned that at 32. Yes. But it didn't apply to anybody else. It didn't work. I would have done to do it with Billard. So you're good. You're with him. You're fine. But anyone else, you're still vulnerable. Okay. Immediately after, now we're on a fucking role. Now we go into tell him on Luis there pretty quick after that. And Ridley Scott, obviously, one of the great kind of masters to ever do it. Just a genius. Hard breaking end. What did he bring to that? You know what? I just watched it with a friend two nights ago. I mean, I've seen it a million times. I watched it again. And I was just so bold over by everything he brought to it. There's so many details that I have seen. That was Ridley's idea. That was Ridley. He did that, you know, like a motorcycle suddenly screamed by some vehicle shooting water out at the car and we dodged it. And all kinds of just visual stuff, a crop duster playing flies over the convertible and just keep brought such profound visual element to it besides being a genius director with all that acting and everything. As an actor, you can miss all that stuff. You're like, focus on your scene. We have this three page scene in this car. You don't even notice a fucking crop duster by the back or if you thought you would think it was coincidental. Right. Yeah, you're kind of unaware of how much of the sausage is being made around you. He made that movie so much bigger than it could have been. And then Susan arrives in your life as kind of a real signpost of like some things you'd like to take on. Yeah. Oh, man. She changed my life more than anybody and we're still right or die. So the first day I met her was a good example. We were getting together with Ridley, just the three of us. We're going to go through the script and see if anybody had any comments or thoughts. And there was a few little things I wanted to bring up, but I had tried to figure out the girliest possible way to bring them up. Well, this I can just mention on the set. Your pattern at that time was every sentence you said was mitigated with. This is probably a dumb idea or I'm sorry to even bring this up right. You were constantly apologizing for having an appendation. Apologizing for a consistent little load of having thoughts about something. But so we sit down crack up at the script and on page one, Susan says, Ridley, you know what? My first line here. I don't think we need it. Or we could put it in the next scene and then he was like, yeah, sure. And I was literally like, what is she doing? What's this? How did she just do that? How come she didn't find out first how he'd react to something? The whole day was like that, the whole experience and then the entire movie was like that. I had never been in the presence of a woman who doesn't apologize for existing ever. And advocates for herself without any fear of herself. And everybody loved her. It wasn't like, we like Gina better because she's so wimpy, everybody adored her. It wasn't like she was fighting, but she just knows what she wants and says what she wants. Were you trying to figure out how she had become that way? That would have been my great fascination. It's like, how did she end up this way? It took just a minute. I've never thought about how did she manage to be that way. She was the oldest of many siblings. She's a boss, yeah, yeah. She might have also just decided or understood that her value was more than just how she looked or being this very female presence that she offered something else. She offered thoughts and her brain and something like that. Exactly. It seems like it should be. It seems obvious. It's natural. Yeah. But it's not like that. But it sure wasn't for me. Not for a lot of women. It's hard. But it's interesting is everyone now will recognize that movie as like this very seminal feminist movie. But I don't think I even realize as to I was researching you that that was not the takeaway of the time when it came out, but it was one of the weird things that were happening around that movie. Because it was wildly successful. Right. A lot of the reviewers had a problem with it. Like a week after it came out, Susan and I were on the cover of time, but there were two editorials denouncing the movie about how bad this is. This is a horrible idea. And a lot of reviews were like, this is male bashing. Hmm. A female rapist bashing. There's hopefully a difference between man and rapist. And there's seven important male characters and oh my god, what a horrible message now the women have guns. Oh my god. So it was really frowned on, but it didn't impact its success. People really liked it, and it did well, but but culture was not there yet, right? So you got nominated for that movie and Susan took it in Susan as well. We did talk about Susan lot. So I don't want to be accused of now. I got to talk about the one man in the movie, but I'm so in love with him. I'm just so head over. I know. Herbicattel is just gorgeous. I know. Herbicattel. Oh, you mean. Oh, you mean. I don't know. I was like the piano. Oh. He's nude in the piano, which I appreciate. Herbicattel. Yeah. But obviously Brad Pitt, this is his breakout role. Did you think when you were watching like, yeah, this motherfucker is going to really be a thing? He's a star. Or no. I didn't think this motherfucker. This is wonderful. Give it big. Yeah. Yeah. It's just going to be all. I was positive that the reaction he got was the reaction he was gonna get and you have a nice fun glimpse of him Because you have a glimpse of him probably more aweshocks you Missouri boy than this International movie star Yes, what was he like back then? Oh god. Yeah, he was so fun so sweet so excited so happy to be doing it and playful Also, which I think you could tell in the way he plays the character But he was just having fun with everything and loose and for his first really big role He just killed it was everyone in love with them. Yeah. Yeah We still are But I have to tell you a funny story. Did you hear about my George Clooney story? No, so I was getting on a plane in Europe one time And all the flight attendants were waiting at the door for me to show up and they said Guess who you're sitting next to George Clooney. Oh my god. What's in my life? I said the right thing at the right time and I said guess who he's sitting next to Right, that is right. I was like I can't believe I came up with that Good for you. So I sat down. He's charming. He's gregarious. He's Telling stories and we're talking and then at one point he says You know, I hate that Brad Pitt. I said, isn't he like your best friend? He said, no, I hate him because he got the part in some of the movies. I said, oh, oh Really? Did you want that part? And he said couldn't you tell when I auditioned with you? Oh? Red with you. Yes. That's hilarious. Were you embarrassed? I'm so wimpy. I didn't say no. I didn't remember you at all, huh? You know, I said all right. No, I did. Oh, no He would have laughed if I said he of course he would have I would mind it on the same thing Yeah Her feel like you don't remember then you can be like I don't that's a take that's a Susan take So Susan would have done. Yeah, I think it's like because I've been in this position a bunch of times And it's like the last thing you want is to tell someone like oh, yeah, you're un Memorable not like hey, I've met 11,000 people this year, but he is putting her in the position It's one thing if he's just like oh, yeah, I auditioned with you Then you might be like oh, I know I remember like then you want to make them feel good But if it's like you don't remember So then 92 league of your own comes along. This is a huge triumph as well Open number one 10th biggest movie of the year you Tom Hanks Madonna had Madonna done Much before then acting. Yeah, I don't think so if it was after that Yeah, I'm sure it was yeah, and we didn't know what to expect or she's gonna It's gonna happen on to her I think she was so normal Loki team player. Yeah for people listening today You have to imagine Taylor Swift's senior. Oh, yeah, I mean, and then some right Madonna was beyond saying oh my god She was already an icon, but she was still very young. Were you guys bros? Did you get on well? All of us got along great I was mostly close with with Laurie Petty This is again in your book. This is another one of the things like you had done no athletics And then you have to be the best Baseball player along anyone has ever seen But you took to it really quickly. You surprised yourself. Yes, I surprised everybody I think but everybody else had been training in baseball for a while But I had to catch up and the coaches soon started saying You know, you have a lot of untapped athletic ability and I'm like and did I ever think I was gonna hear that That's crazy and I did and I pulled it off. I think definitely, but I could really play up to this point You've had a really wonderful incremental everything. It's a little better than the last thing Had you settled into like of that'll be the pattern or were you looking around and going like no Everyone takes it on the chin. I will also take it on the chin. What were you thinking? Do you think it was just gonna be a Completely linear rise and all the movies would work. You're asking me crisis that not only nobody asked me But I haven't even thought about what did I think because we got to go back to 1992 for this question This minute ago. I think I felt like things are gonna work out pretty good I didn't have a feeling like well, I've been the lead or one of the leads in two movies in a row You know, I year apart and nominated for all the movies winning winning golden globe all the proof is there Yeah, I don't know what I thought. I honestly don't remember what I Thought Or if I was surprised that didn't happen or anything. I didn't have nearly the run you had But I did have a run where I had a few hits in a row and they were all things that shouldn't have been hits And I went oh well done now when I go to this movie that's got a big budget with a great director Who fucking knows what's gonna happen? And then like that movie didn't work And I was like oh Jesus now what I thought for sure. Okay, we made it out of the 10 year fucking doldrums We're finally it's happening and then I climb up to this wrong of the ladder and then very rude awakening like no If you have a couple in a row that don't work it's rough. That's right So anyways, you had a couple in the row that didn't work as anticipated one of them's my favorite movie that you ever did Which is a long-kiss good night if you haven't seen long-kiss good night In fact, I got to show you I want to see it. I'll watch it tonight. Oh, let me hear you with the premise. She is a housewife kind of mom type Lady Tried wife. She gets amnesia. Oh, she hasn't had amnesia. It doesn't realize she had amnesia. It's before born It's kind of born. Oh, and then slowly starts realizing after an accident that she's got skills. She can't explain And she's actually an assassin. Oh cool and very born. Yeah The script's great. You're a fucking brilliant. The premise is perfect. And then Sam Jackson come on What's that line? He has like you ask him if he's Mormon. He's like, yeah, that's why I just had two Jack and coaxing a pack of new ports or some show like that. He has some great line So great. He was just coming off of Pulp Fiction. Yep. He was very hot. Were you so pumped to work with him? Oh my god Yeah, yeah, and then he's the greatest guy ever. That's the coolest dude. The coolest dude ever All we did was laugh and have fun. We had so much fun, but it didn't work that one did fine We thought it was gonna the movie before cutthroat island was in the Guinness Book World record is the biggest financial That's been way blown away by now. Yeah, even when I see the price of that movie. It's kind of cute She's like 110 million. That was like the biggest disaster ever. Oh god. Yeah, now people are writing off like 400 million I know. No, no. How did you process that heartbreak of that you're also married to the director? I'm guessing when I've had movies that failed that I wrote and directed I've got three months or I'm just depressed You know, I did that for two and a half years and now that happened. Oh, and I'm naturally gonna be depressed right and now if my wife was also Children in that same thing. I don't know who's available to nurture Yeah, well you could kind of had to nurture each other through that and we knew we had Long kiss coming up so that helped, but I was gonna tell you about the pirate movie Oh, yeah, Tommy cutthroat cutthroat. Yeah, so cutthroat island It was going to star Michael Keaton. He asked Renny. I was already with Renny and maybe married already He wanted some substantial actors to play the female part which was much smaller than his and all that So he was begging Renny to get me to do it. I was like, I think I really do want to do it And Renny was begging wait, please, please. Is that heart stressful? Oh, it's very stressful Yeah, like you want to do your husband or wife of whatever favor they want, but also I don't want to gamble my career Yeah, so Anyway, I finally got my arm twisted enough that I said that I would do it and then Michael eventually Drop that he just suddenly I'm not doing it and Renny and I I mean he wasn't that crazy about the script either and so we were like We're getting out of it. We don't have to do it. Oh my god Yeah, we're like dancing around and then Maria Kassar it was Carolco was the producers And I had the same agency as Michael and I thought well easily. I'll get out of this and they were told no There's no way she's getting out of this. She is doing it. We'll sue her or just Michael Douglas get to get out of it And I don't get to get out of it. I don't have only a small potatoes compared to him. It was a Michael Douglas or Michael Keaton Michael Douglas. Oh, Michael Douglas Okay, yeah, that's great great great great great. Yeah, Michael Douglas So god now we gotta do it and we got Matthew Moghine who was fabulous in it and a great guy and a lot of fun But it was really against our will Right, so as long as I didn't feel right from the jump and then turned up So maybe we learn like a gut intuition less enough of that one Well, yeah, I mean don't get talked into anything ever again But we went into it with a good will you know, and I trained a trade to do piratical stuff Yeah, you learn to swash buckle. I buckled my spot Yeah, yeah, yeah, I had to learn horseback riding and all that stuff Stay tuned for more armchair expert if you dare Okay, I just one fun thing that people certainly want to know is that in 99 You tried out for the us Olympic archery team I was like what did I do at night? Yeah, which you it's that started in '97, so you'd only been doing it for two years. - Two and a half. - And what you had seen it in something? Why did you even get interested? - I had to learn to play baseball, and then I had to learn Swarsh Blanket. I could go and horseback ride again, going to shooting and then ice skating and gun shooting. While ice skating for Lancaster's good night, all these skills, and I was kinda good at all of them. - Yeah. - And I had not had any clue that I was coordinated, and so it was so much fun. And then I thought, I think I'd like to take up a sport in real life, and not the movie version of it, 'cause no matter what, if I didn't catch the ball, that didn't do another take. - Yeah. - Put in the stunt double. - So then I was just watching the Olympics on TV in Atlanta, and there was a lot of coverage of archery, because the American men's team was winning all the medals. And I thought, you know, that's really beautiful and it's very dramatic, and I didn't learn how to shoot. Tastles really well, and it's kind of a weapon. So I thought, I'm gonna try archery and found a coach, and became utterly obsessed with it. - Like how frequently are you doing it? - Practicing every day, like four or five hours. - Four or five hours in your what, backyard shooting at a hay bell? - No, no. - It'll be stupid death. - No, I was just, hey, Bill, cannot stop an arrow. You really have to be somewhere safe to do that. So I'd go to a range and meet with my coach constantly. And then he told me I had to start competing, and I was like, oh no, I'm not anywhere near. He said, no, no, no, it's about getting better. You go to get better. So I'd be competing and then I won the California Cup one year. - Wow. - And he said, what you liked about it is it was objective versus how subjective your career was. - Exactly. - Are you hitting the target or not? - Do you think it was a SAV for dealing with the kind of disappointment and uneasiness about what was next? - Could be. - Yeah, 'cause again, it's a control thing back to the compulsive behavior. It's like repetitive. - Oh yeah. - It's singular, very repetitive. - Narrowed your world, which is scary right now and unpredictable to a red dot. I mean, this all feels very regulating. - Yes, very regulating and very specific. And I had the time. I didn't work that soon after long. It's good, nice. So I had two and a half years to focus only on that. - Why? - So you entered in '99 to go to the Olympic trials? - I qualified as a semi-finalist for the Olympic trials. - Three Inter people entered and you finished 24. - Oh my God. - It was 300 people at the national tournament and then they took the top 32 could be in the semi-finals. You were in those. And then you somehow got a wild card and went to Athens. - That was Sydney. - In Sydney. So Sydney built all of their venues way before they hosted the Olympics. And a year before it, they tried out every single sport. And they had the top people come and just to run it and make sure everything was-- - It was the rest of the rehearsal. - Yeah. And so the real team went and they said, you could come to it. So I got to wear the uniform and walk out into music. And everything was so fun. - Oh my God. How cool. - I don't wear that one though. That's okay. That's okay. You got to go. - How old were you when you had your daughter? - 46. - Okay. So I wonder if you have, I have such great gratitude for waiting to 38, right? There were so many times when both little kids are screaming where I'm like, oh man, I don't know if I would have the patience for this in my 20s. Also my career was sorted enough. I guess all the mountains I was trying to climb entire to that. And so this, I could really, do you have that kind of gratitude for waiting later? Or did you have moments where, like God, I should have done this 20 years earlier? - No, no. I always was grateful that it was later. And I felt like it was important that I had a stronger sense of self who I was. - Yeah, 'cause you're gonna have to model what it is to be a woman in this society of ours. - Of that? - Yes. - But you're watching children's programming with her when she's like two. And you start noticing a lot of little boys in these shows. - I did. The very first thing I showed her, I had her on my lap and I'm thinking, oh, this is great. It's a preschool show. I think it's because of Thelma Louise and it really heightened my awareness of how women are portrayed. Because women had so few opportunities to come out of a movie feeling empowered by the female characters. So I immediately noticed that they seemed to be far more male characters than even looked it up. And they had one female character in this large cast. And I was like, well, that's weird. And then rented a video and it was like that. A movie that came out and I'd go, wait a minute. - Yeah. - And you were thinking what I would be thinking which is like, oh, this has already been fixed. - I had thought that. - Yeah, we're like, we're 12 years past Thelma Louise. I assume this has been strained out. - Oh, right, absolutely. And then I immediately kind of went global with it because I'm like, wait, so we're training kids for minute one to have unconscious gender bias. How can they not get it when every single situation has one female-- - Turn out to be three to one. - Little rascals, you know, like putting a Darla and that was it. - Yeah, we got it. We got Darla back to the boys. - Right. - How could a young girl not into it? Well, there's one third as many role, one fourth as many opportunities for me. Like I should recognize that. That's the world I'm entering. - Right, and also how her boys aren't going to recognize that they're more important to the girl. - Exactly. - How are they even going to care about the female character? - They're being told what's important. - Right, right. - So, but you had a novel approach to addressing this. - Well, I went to the Olympics in it. Everything I do, I had to be careful about taking it up because whatever it is, I want to go to the Olympics. But I asked people constantly in the industry, whatever meeting I had, whoever it was. I'd say, have you ever noticed how few female characters there are in entertainment made for kids? And every single person said, oh, no, no, no. That's not true anymore. No, that's been fixed. And they say, we fixed it at our studio, at our production company, whatever. And they would very often name a movie with one female character as proof that gender inequality was not a thing anymore. - As I say, well, we have Obama as a president. Racism's over. - Exactly, so it made me realize this is utterly unconscious and they think it's not true. So if I was able to, with data, show them that it is true, this big imbalance, maybe they won't want to change. So I sponsored this largest research study I've ever done on kids, TV and movies. - Through the Annembrook School at USC, were there your partners? - Yeah, that was incredible. - At that time, yes. And then started visiting anybody who makes children's entertainment. The first studio that we went to, we finished the presentation and their heads were in their hands, their jaws were on the ground, they were like, how did we not know this? - All we care about is doing right by kids. And we never thought of this. - Because at that time, the conclusion of your study right was it was three boys to every girl. - Right, and the lead characters, it was 11 to one. - Oh wow. - For a lead female character. And crowd seems to everything were wildly imbalanced. So we went everywhere, everybody was horrified and everybody started changing. - Wow. - But there was 2004, where we at now, I think 2020 was the dead eye red. So even four years ago, where was it? - Yeah, now we're at parity and children's. - Wow! - That's amazing, oh my gosh. - You should be so proud of your job. - 15, 16 years. - Yeah. - Oh, that's incredible. - Yeah, the latest study we did, we looked at specifically at new kids' programs. They just came out and it was 55. - Oh my goodness, that's so, what an accomplishment. Of all your accomplishments, I hope that's maybe one of your highest. That's incredible. - She also created the Benton Film Festival, Bentonville. Are you friends with one of the Walton's? Is that a Walton project? - No, Walbert came up with the idea, actually, of having a film festival that focused on diversity and somehow thought of me. - Probably not somehow, you're the most seminal feminist movie ever. - Yeah, I co-founded it. - A cool thing about the Walton's is to get their inheritance all the children, they have to take on a large public works project and make their community better. So Bentonville's is very weird town, the middle of Arkansas right, but I have, yeah. But they have like one of the best museums in the world and they have the best bicycle parkway, right? They have all these incredible installations because of how they get their inheritance, which is so cool. - It's so incredible. And Alice Walton just built the best medical school ever built. And it's, I think it's either free or something. If you agree to stay in the area and work for a certain number of years. It's this pocket of progressive explosion. It's incredible. - With like some of the best art pieces in the world, it's hilarious. You can imagine one day Bentonville being like this weird Eden that they've created through all these public works and projects. - Right, wow. - Okay, the burrows. - Yes. - I'm watching it and I love it. - Aww. - It's sweeping Netflix by storm, right? I think I saw the number one. - No. - Well, this is so wonderful and encouraging. Okay, so the burrows, you explain how you want to explain it. I'm gonna use a reference that only people in my age will like. But I wanna hear how you would set it up. - It takes place in a fancy, fancy retirement community. - I wanna live there, it looks very appealing. - That's been my dream life. I wanna live in a community. camp, but adults golf car shuffleboard. Right. They say, well, now we're going to go canoe. Oh, okay. Now we're going to take a field trip. Okay. Now it's lunch. Now it's lunch. And I don't have to decide anything. Yeah. Yeah. That's what I want. So retirement community and it focuses on a group of friends live all in the same cul-de-sac. And then something spooky and dangerous starts happening. A lot of stranger things. It's tougher, brothers. So there's like some, I don't know. There's a creature. Is he an alien? Is he a weird animal monster from your childhood? Monster. Oh, right. What I like about it, I help you take this as a compliment because I fucking love this movie. And it speaks to how much it transcended that I would have watched this movie at 10 and loved it. But cocoon is still one of my favorite movies ever. Do you remember cocoon? Oh, yeah. There are these. Do you ever see cocoon monica? There are these alien pods. These little cocooning aliens are in a swimming pool and it's giving them magic powers. And they all get very youthful. Now what's incredible is if you've ever seen the Instagram post that says all of their ages from that movie. No, they weren't really that old. Brimley was like 52 years old. Oh, my God. I don't think anyone in the cast was over 60. Maybe Alan Arkin or something. But nobody's even over 60. And we watch it movie like, Oh, look, these grandpa's have super crazy. That's crazy. It is. Same with Golden Girls. Yeah, Golden Girls. They were all young. Still yet he was like almost the same age as her daughter. Yeah. Yeah. These were like in their 40s on this. Yeah. It's a lot of tired grandma. Did they think people just couldn't stand to actually watch old people? It's such a different time. Oh, yeah. Yeah. I've had this moment several times where it's like I get offered a role in the character has an 18 year old or a 24 year old. And I'm like, yeah, that's correct chronologically. I just think this job has a very weird ability to remind you in a very cruel way of how old you are all the time. Yes. It's like you get the thing is like, oh, I'm someone with a terminal disease. That's who I'm playing. That's where we're at. So did you have any like shock of like, yeah, it makes sense that I would be in a show about this? Yes. I was like that. But like you, I mean, I turned down any number of roles because the character had adult children or grandma. And I was like, at no time on earth. I got to play a grandma. But no, I was very whatever age I was, but I said, I don't even want teenage kids. Yeah. Yeah. But this made sense. I've been on a couple shows where the older cast members are going to have to die, right? Like I was on this great show, Parenthood and Craig T Nelson, who's just a blessing. Yeah. He's going to play someone's dying. I mean, vaguely of old age, you know, like just thing a hard thing, but still. And I just remember talking to him and being like, is this tricky, dude? Like, I think it would be tricky for me to go like, wait, this makes sense to everybody that I'd be playing some of that might drop dad right now. Like, this is a lot, I think to contend with. Exactly. Well, the good thing, I think something I really like about this show is we're all very able. We can battle dangerous things. And there's no beats about how we can even get up there. Right. No, but there is a scene where you're all showing off your scars. That's true. And everyone's had a massive operation, right? There were some of their old fun cut-opens, ones that they're back home. You've had your hip replace. First, I just love the show. It's so good. Your character's so fun. You're kind of the vixen of the scene. You're a ex-music manager. So you're like hip and cool. And you drive a cool, fairly and convertible. And you're awesome. You're a rock star. But I was like, we are still a little bit caught in the notion, like, you wouldn't be in a retirement community. In reality, they need to be 15 years older. Everything's changed. When I was young, all seven-year-olds were retirement communities. That's not how it is now. It's not how it is now. And my character's the only one who didn't plan to go there. My mom bought that house, and I had to take care of her. And I also lost all my money. And that I just ended up staying. But a few times I refer to the fact that I don't really belong here. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Had you worked with Alfred Melina or Bill Paulman before? This is my third thing with Bill Paulman. My third project with Ed Begley Jr. I've done three with him as well. Really? Is it his? Oh, love. It scares me out, sweeties. But also, Bill Paulman is like that. It's so sweet. He's the one I've never met him. Yeah, oh God. It's so weird to say this, but he's weirdly a revelation in this show. Right? He is. Even though I've seen him a million times, I'm like, this is great. He's like a fucking beach stoner, retired dude. He's so chill. He's incredible. It makes you go, I don't know wonder they got him. Yeah, yeah, yeah. This is great. This sounds like it's doing like anti-agism work. Yeah, you have a very young lover. He's 40. Yeah, he's 30 years younger than me. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Fun. But Renee is like, so what? Yeah, she's great. She's feeling very confident and so is he and everyone's winning. But I will say, I was watching it with my wife and our 13-year-old and 11-year-old daughters last night. And I love these situations, right? Like, I'm feeling a certain way and I'm like, I'm going to bring this up to everyone. And I said during that scene, we were watching the sexy scene with you guys. And I said, isn't it crazy, you guys, that we have seen at this point a thousand movies where the age gap was this, but it was a guy and the woman. And you don't notice, but this is highly noticeable. Yes. And isn't that really something? Like, let's just talk about that for a minute. It really is. You want to think about Michael Douglas is in something and he's got a 40-year-old. You know, you just, yeah, it happens all the time in film. You don't even notice, but this is very noticeable. Right. Yeah. Because we're not used to it. That's why that's why it's noticeable. Yeah, it's just a thing for you to get to talk about with your kids. It's an opportunity. Right. Right. To hear what these young girls think about that, like, oh, wow, why are we seeing this for the first time? Yeah. That's so cool. You brought that up. I really dig that. We're watching something from the 70s or 80s and something gnarly happens. You know, it just doesn't happen that way anymore. Like, the way guys were talking to women or something was just pausing me, like, well, what do you guys think of this? Oh, that's so cool. That's so great. That was kind of standard. In the 80s, that was like standard. Guys would just say shit like that to women. And you know, what do we, what do we think about this? Oh, it's figure to watch it with your kids. Well, my kids were, I watched everything with them because I felt like I could be their media interpreter. I would say, why do you think she's wearing that if she's going to go rescue somebody? That's not appropriate. Or did you notice? Do you think girls could do what all those boys are doing? And my name's, I think there's more. So you got to the point where, and even if we're out of the movie, if I just went like this, I go, I know mom, I'm not enough girls in that scene. It's so great. That's the best part, though. Kids are supposed to fuck with their moms. My wife's constantly talking about what neurologist she just saw on Instagram and what new hack we have. And soon as my wife starts talking, either girls like, is this one of your neurologists from Instagram? Or did you actually, and they're like 11 and 13 already got a dialed, you know? That's hilarious. Okay. The last thing I want to talk about is you just kind of went viral. Second weekend of Coachella, you were a guest at the Sabrina Carpenter show. Yeah, not just a guest. I was on stage. Oh, yes. I guess guests means you were in attendance. No, you were on stage. Right. In a convertible catalog or something like that. Very much Thelma and Louise ask. And Susan had done it the weekend before. Yes. Yes. I had no idea. When she did that, I thought, oh, that's cool. I had no idea they were then going to ask me to do it. But that was who calls you? Does Sabrina Carpenter herself call you? No, I mean, they called my agent, her people that I guess, but she was the one that wanted me to do it. That's awesome. What do you think of her? I love her. Oh, I love her so much. And she was so wonderful and person and so charming and gave me a t-shirt. I guess the title of her show was Sabrina Wood. It's this given one that said Gina Wood. Oh, cute. I loved it. It was so fun. But I didn't expect to blow up like that. Somebody said, you're trying to get a like, what? Yeah. Yeah. You never know what's coming. You never do. I have so much gratitude for her, for Taylor Swift. I've taken our daughters to both those performers. Oh, that's great. For them to be little girls watching these women who have created a true matriarchy. They have their own world. And they are the top of that world. They don't have to suffer any fools. They're in charge. There weren't a ton of examples like that. And now there's a ton. That's true. It's true. It's pretty rad. Yeah. It is. Yeah. I'm delighted that that happened. Had you ever been to Coachella? No. Yeah. Me neither. I think that's the way I want to go. The first time I want to be on stage. The biggest thing is the most love performance of the night. Exactly. Okay. And then lastly, where are you at? Are you still susceptible to if a guy likes you? Or have we evolved in that? If a guy just simply likes you, is that enough anymore? No, no. That's not enough. You said that. And what did you learn when that shifted? When you start thinking, wait, what do I like? Is that what it was? Right. I had been attracted to extroverted, flashy, shiny men. And now not so much anymore. Not so much. So prep it. It doesn't They have a chance now actually well it is we make an exception to exclude him from the pool of bachelors. We'll consider. Oh, well, Gina, I adore you for real. Sincerely long. It's one of the first films I think I owned on Blu-ray that I went over and over again. I just love it. I'm so in the mood to watch it again. I can't wait to show my daughters. It's an honor to meet you. Yeah. I'm really excited. I didn't tell you anything about Leicester night Sam and I well we changed the ending when we were shooting because we realized we would love to do a sequel and in the original script Sam's character dies so we re-shot the last scene and made him live and I know it's all these years later but we still Sam and I talk about we're dying to do a sequel. Oh, I would love you. Well, I know but we're going to get somebody to do it. I nominate Netflix. Yeah. You're there. You're crushing. They want to be in the Gina business now. Gina what? Let's get. Yeah, Gina. Would Gina do a sequel? Yeah. Gina is open to a sequel. Okay. Well, lovely meeting you. Thanks for the work you've done on the gender parity with Gid shows and hopefully that moves upstream all the way and everyone watched the burrow. Thanks so much, Gina. Thank you. This is really fun. Oh, cool. Yeah. Just a quick reminder that as part of our summer break, here's a rerun of one of our favorite fact checks. I got my hair cut today. Barb did my hair. Barb. Where do you find Barb? Barb chopstick. What did you say? Don't ever say that. What did you say? Barb Thompson. Thompson. Okay. She's awesome. Um, and she's done my hair before. She did it for Gala. Okay. I know. And she said you did a great job. Are you drawing your hair out on your legs? Don't look. I just haven't shaved. But I didn't know if you were making a decision like everyone's making. That was a fair question. Oh, my God. What happened? I can't believe you did that. I was. Well, I wanted to celebrate you if you were embracing. Look at that. No. Okay. I'm going to be a little bit more careful. Delta and her friend had brought their two most important stuffies in a red bag. I didn't know that. I probably would have been like, maybe we don't bring them into the event. Can you describe the stuffies? Yes. It's imperative that people understand the stakes here. So anyone that knows Delta would know her son Groot. Oh my God. I don't even count Groot as a stuffie. When you say that, I wasn't thinking of him. He's a real boy. He really is. I like the robot. I don't know that I've ever seen and I had very deep relationships with my stuffies. I had three bears that I loved and I thought about them. And if I was gone too long, I felt guilty. I was very in touch and close with myself. What are their names? I didn't name them. One was a polar bear. One was a brown bear. And one was like. And? A koala bear. There were different breeds. So I didn't breed. I see. So you just said koala polar. I just never was like. You never called me that. I was just squeezing them and feeling guilty. So what if like it was downstairs and you had to tell your mom like. Oh my God. Polar is missing. That would never. It would never happen. I would never. Fluse track. You never. Okay. And they didn't travel out of my room either. Because I was too afraid something would happen to them in the wild. Okay. But to put like this in perspective, Groot goes everywhere with us. Mm hmm. Groot has truly a bigger wardrobe than Delta. Yeah. He has many different jammies. He has swimwear. He has like. But for Delta's birthday, she'll often ask for clothes for Groot. That mostly that's all she asks for. Things for Groot. And he has booksy reads. And he's an artist. And she makes him dinner. And he like so. It's such a huge part of her life. Yeah. And then I didn't know this. I learned this recently about Groot. She was kind of explaining what was going on with him athletically. And then I said, is Groot disabled? Oh. And she said, yeah, Groot is disabled. And I said, oh, what's his disability? And she said, well, he's half tree and half boy. So he needs to breathe carbon dioxide as a tree. But he needs to breathe oxygen as a boy. So his lungs are like half dedicated to breathing. And so that's kind of an impairment for his cardiovascular. Additionally. Stop. This is all real. Like I didn't even know Groot was disabled. Well, obviously. But I just had a hunch. There was some way she was talking about his athleticism. And his outfit. Sure. I don't know. I asked. And he is. And then she went on to tell me another challenge he has is he's got both veins. And then he also has to have plumbing for the water. So it's like his body's sharing a lot of. Wow. Double duty. Double duty. Also his bark hasn't come in and that's going to make him more stable. Wow. Yes, it was a lot going on. That's okay. Wow. And I'm going to be honest. I love Groot. Yeah. Like she's also my grandson. And when we snuggle at night, I go, I want a little time with Groot. So he has to be at my mouth. Oh, does everyone have to leave? No, no, no, just I will want Groot in my left nook and Delta in my right knuckle for all laying together. But she's got to give me some grandpa. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. Okay. It's good. That's because you like him in your neck and like like a kid, like a kid. Yeah. Like a little baby boy. So. Okay. So great time or having the best time now we're up in this huge suite. There's like 50 people in there. It's a blast. It's hectic. And Delta comes up like mid show. Again, I'm going to say it. I've said it before. There's no better show on earth than monster jam. It starts and it doesn't let up race, race, race, race, race, stun stun stun stun. So it's a party. We're eating food. And then Delta comes up to me. And she is. She's passed. Like she's. I don't want to say she's hyperventilating. She is so scared and panicked. And she said, we don't we lost. Groot. And I'm like, what do you mean? I didn't even know. Groot was in here. We lost the bag. So her friend was in charge of carrying the bag. She brought it in here. Someone maybe stole it or whatever. I'm like, no one stole it. Everyone that came is still here. No one left mid. You know. So now we start scouring all the bathrooms in there. And then we go through systematically and we look under every single chair. This takes 35, 40 minutes. I'm missing the monster jam. Sure. But you can hear it still. I can hear it. That is helpful. And I say at some point, okay. It's not in here, which means it didn't it didn't come up here. Oh. Now we arrived and we went right out onto the to the arena floor to take that ride. So it's like, we're seven stories up. That was pre show. And so now trying to take him into the monster truck. Yeah. So well, here becomes the investigation. So then curling. I'm like, oh, I made a video of them get. I'm like, did they even bring the bag out of the car? Right. I took pictures. Yeah. It takes them. Oh, yeah, there's the red bag. Then I have footage of them getting on to the monster truck. And she's carrying the bag. We don't have footage of them getting off. But I'm like, but this is she would have never set it down in the elevator on the walk. It definitely had to get left in the truck. So now, exactly. And we're now a mid show. This is ours later. And I. And is that truck like? out on the thing. No, that truck has now been already put in a trailer to go to the next monster jam. So I like, this is like my friend Sally, who I've been, you know, going to monster jam with Sally as our host for, I don't know, eight years now. Yeah. She's an incredible lady. She's an armchair. She's so sweet. And I'm like, I don't know what else to do, but like, here's the situation. She's a mom. She put out a full court press. Oh, look, I, okay, I'll try to get into that truck. Like, I'll try to find the truck in the parking lot and try to get into the semi to get into this monster, you know, blah, blah. So like an hour goes by and Delta's really like, she lost her son. Oh my God. And I'm, I'm very pessimistic. I'm like, who knows? They set that bag down anyway. There are so many bags and so many things and so much equipment. And it's in an arena. So I was really, really pessimistic. And then the show ends and then we just sit there for another 45 minutes while the whole place clears out, we're kind of like waiting to see if they're going to find group. And then she says, well, you guys are free to, if you want to just wait in the car. So I always, we go sit in the car now. And then I get a text from Kelly. It's a picture of her and she's a lady and she's holding the bag. She found the bag in a random golf cart somewhere. No. Yeah. It was on its way to the trash. It's way to a sex trafficking. Oh, don't say that. Oh my God. Oh my God. What a tale. Oh my God. It was the amount of relief I felt so obsessed scary when that bag returned. You know, I was starting to think about what our next two weeks to a month look like I was like, this is going to be imagine when it's like to lose your son. You never get over it. Yeah, it's going to be devastating in a way that I'm not sure how we're all going to deal with. We lost group forever. That is. And then I said to her, I was like, once we had group, I was like, you know, I started thinking like, what do I do? What would you have wanted me to find the same group? And she's like, no, yeah, because it's real. And he's real. And there's no replacing them. Well, and so she answered our long lasting question about would you clone? Would you clone your dog or your kid? She won't. Yeah. I guess she is like me. Yeah. She is. I guess she has ethics. We don't know what that means ethically. Oh gosh. That's why. But okay, if he had gone in the monster truck and then got sent to the next monster truck show, that's a kid's book. That's a children's book. And like they love them. And he becomes kind of a mascot for a monster. Yeah. But then he returns back home. Yeah. But he's like now we choose tobacco. And he's thrown up a little bit. He's very couple of tussles. Well, he's on the monster jam tour. Yeah. He is. He's not going to like symposiums on physics. But he's very, it's very toy story. Yes. Yes. He could have been on a real adventure. I don't think that all the dust from the monster truck would be good for his lungs. Well, not given what I've learned about his. Yeah. Now, what if like the driver of Gravedigger found him and started keeping him on the dash. And we could like then we were watching. And he was riding on the dash, probably. Oh my God. That's terrifying. Oh, it was really an event. Yeah. So I missed a good half of monster jam. I'm both looking for and then panicking over. Sally really. Oh my God. The hero of all heroes. Wow. Yeah. I mean, if you were to ask me at some point what I would pay for his safe return, it would have been embarrassing. I know, but that's that's life. It's like, you can't, you can't buy health. Well, actually, I mean, to an extent, you can't, which is a problem. But, you know, that's why health is the most important thing we have. And just being there, I guess. Yeah, being there. Being present. Well, I'm also grateful because I immediately got co-dependent for the girl, the friend. Can you imagine? No, I know. So that was all happening. She now feels so guilty and she's crying. Delta is crying inconsolably. Yep. Her friends crying. And I'm like the dad watching. And so I would kept going, oh, sweetie, it's totally okay. Delta should have been carrying her own bag. It's nice. Yeah. I was trying to convert her and trying to convert Delta. Her group is in there too. Oh, it is. She's got the double whammy. She's lost her stuffy and she lost Delta stuffy. Who was her stuffy? I didn't get a good gander at once. They were all reunited. I didn't even know we were bringing stuffies to monster. Not anymore. I hope not. And then, okay. Now, this is the thing that we go back to. We were been talking about this the last few episodes. I'm like, and I'm talking to Charlie and Eric. I'm like, you know, all I got to do is keep trying to find group and not say, this is why we don't bring what you want to say as a parent is, this is why we don't bring Delta to sporting events. Yep. And I was like, she has learned that lesson. She, I don't need to tell her that she isn't major discomfort. Yeah. And so I let it go. But then I on the way home, I was just saying how grateful I was. I used to bat. Slippin it in a little bit. A little bit. And then, and then I said, he's just so valuable. We got to be sure that we're safe when we bring him place. She goes, but he can't just be a boy that lives at home and doesn't go and do things. He can't just be protecting them from it. I'm like that. I know that's a great point, but there's a ton of things we can take him to. So he's not stuck in the house, but that are also maybe not so distracting as monster. This is complex because this is how you feel about your kids. This is how you parent them. You're like, you know, I'm going to let them go explore the world. And another person could say, look, they're a little too valuable for that. Don't let them just go down the street to Ralph's. Right. Where there's crazy. Yeah. So it looks like she's she's inherited my parents. Yeah. In this case. Wow. Yeah. I'm grateful. I'm so grateful. I would understand. Yeah. It would have been so sad if group. I mean, it would have been happy for him if he was on an adventure, but we we know that really he would have gone in the track. Well, he's he's okay. Dax missing persons after like 48 hours. They're dead. Okay. So you think you might want murder him? Trash. Okay. I just can't imagine holding that little guy. He's so sweet. Oh, no. That's why I didn't know he had a disability because he's oh, he's so smiley. I have no idea he's suffering from anything. He's in a perpetually great mood. Well, that's the thing. Is he in pain or I sounded like there's some pain a company in these. Okay. Yeah. Now go and trick him trick her into getting like pain meds for him. I might see if we can get some nerve lockers. Oh my God. Wow. That isn't quite an adventure. I'm yeah. I'm really glad that had a happy ending. Oh, me too. Anything fun happened to you? Yeah. Okay. So you've been gone a couple days. Yeah. In the meantime, I've watched two full seasons of you. The show you show which reminds me I want to play the thing. That's a show about me. Exactly. It's about time that we revisit that because I'm watching. Oh, it's such a great exchange. Okay. Let's Laura Ingram. Yeah. You want me to put on the TV? Oh, yeah. Some of my favorite football all time. And now it has extra meaning because I'm watching the show. Is it a great show? I love it. It has really Veronica Mars vibes. Oh, fun. But it's like Dexter meets Veronica Mars. But I've never seen Dexter. Okay, let's watch this real quick. Yeah. You know, I was watching it. It was so of you where measles came off. Hey, wait, wait, wait. When did I mention measles? I don't know. It was on you. What was on me? What are you talking about? I never had the measles. It was on you. We never did a measles of vaccine episode. Am I? Is this the joke? I know. It was on you. It was on you. I never had >> [LAUGH] >> [LAUGH] >> [LAUGH] >> [LAUGH] >> It's so funny. >> It's a real life who is enjoying it. >> It really is. >> Yeah. >> Oh my God. Anyway, so yeah, I started you, random, it like popped up as the next, this never works out. >> Right, right auto. >> Auto play or whatever. And I was like, sure, why not watch the whole thing. And then last night stayed up so late, I couldn't even look at the time I was too afraid to look. >> Wow. >> And watch all of season two. >> How many episodes in each ten? >> Men. >> So you watch twenty episodes. >> You're like 45-ish minutes. >> Whoa. >> Yes. >> Yes. >> Oh my God. Okay, so it is pen badgly. I'm gossip girl who I loved back then Dan Humphrey, okay great and he recently he has a podcast but also I saw there's like an Instagram kind of viral video of him like dancing I wanted these talk shows and I was well or well okay in my opinion yeah yeah and so I was like oh yeah I love him and then he was a dancing is attractive you know what it is I'm gonna I'm gonna circle back I didn't say it wasn't right right right he just didn't put it very high on the list yeah but turns out it's really hot yeah so um anyway then it pops up and he is a he's a stalker like he's obsessed with this woman there's like murder he's a psychopath but there's a love story and he's hot and it's it's confused it's confusing yeah it's sexy but it's scary yeah it's very thin line for women there well I know and I hated myself of course sure I heard him say on an interview something like that like or someone asked like what do you think of when people say he's hot yeah he was like he's a killer right so I saw that clip before I watch a show and I was like yeah he's right this is people are crazy yeah and then of course I'm like he's hot yeah he's also tricky because he's like kind of a good boyfriend if he wasn't a murder and putting people in cages right yeah who who who just was everyone obsessed with that's also was a murder wasn't there recently someone everyone thought was hot uh that united health oh god yeah people like really horny for him Luigi Luigi that one I that's real life so I find that much more complicated I do not think he's hot no I don't think there's anything good about he was hot without the murder there's no way for me to know yeah you can't go back in time so you have very powerful eyebrows I don't think murder is hot in real life and I don't think vigilantes are hot okay I'm gonna say that good to know I'm not there's a lot of people that are like good for him oh yeah and I I disagree yeah yeah I disagree holy yeah I think that industry is evil and I don't think you're allowed to kill people exactly exactly yeah except and the show sometimes he does kill some people I really don't like and it is vigilante and like it's for kids he's protect sometimes he protects kids he's weird he's like kind of this like good friend and hard to pin down mixed messages really really yeah yeah yeah anyway I am loving it oh wow that's great five seasons oh there's five oh so you're fucked for the whole week I know so what time did you go to bed you know I really don't know but I was so tired of my alarm we're not at nine oh okay yes so I'm gonna have to go back to bed I probably three wow you're nasty I can't help myself I know you're indulgent and because I'm scared a little like it's very cliffhangery it's very good at keeping you on the hook yeah so I'm a little too scared in those scenarios to go to bed like I need to know how it's completed but they do a good job at the end of each season two so I did star episode three but then I was like Monica no yeah you got to stop I got to stop so I turned it off out halfway through that when I woke up this morning yeah after so much murder yeah I was like I think I need to take a break today because it really gets infiltrated and then I made me think this is what's happening with boys and video games oh they're just it's like a constant they're living in this world that's dark and bleak and they're shooting people and stuff and then like reality starts to disappear you're feeling that happened to you well I just could see it this is your own TV like this is you think you're a you're a killer or you think you're a pervert I don't okay in this show it's a lot of voiceover because you're you're hearing his thoughts yeah and so then today I was kind of hearing my thoughts like that right and I thought I need to take a break yeah take a little break no but I also really want to know what he's going right let's see if there's anything else I want to talk about you know you're really fun little business it is easy I get why I get how he's only so culpable it was very confusing but it was just and he didn't do a good job like he should have recognized what was going on much sooner and said it's a television show on Netflix and the title is you and the title is you why oh you yes and not lowering it did end up saying it's a show on Netflix called you and she says but he did he did say I was watching you about seven times before it's a show on Netflix it's so good I almost feel like it's fake and I don't want to like look too I don't think so I don't it is such a genuine reaction from her all right well that's it let's move into facts yeah yeah facts stay tuned for more armchair expert if you dare so facts for Nick Croll when he said daddy's money when he brought that I keep thinking how funny that was when he said that do you remember that yes I don't care because I have daddy's money yeah that was so funny also I wrote down specifically when he said sick little cutie I left so hard it's sick little cutie I thought that was the funniest it was just a sick little cutie yeah he was a mess he was coughing and snoring and pulling digestion there for him and I find him loved it it was great um and then I was kind of like oh sick little cutie is kind of like my kink that is your kink yeah sick little cutie that could be your clothing line sick little cute sick little cuties um anyway that was just like really made me laugh he's so funny but it's more than that he's got that thing some people have where he is just like infinitely comfortable in his own skin which is so appealing yeah it's such a comforting personality type it is yeah the women came after me just she should I tell you that what do you mean the went on my what I thought was an incredibly obvious joke about period period underwear and tampax such a joke some women really came at me hard I think they also might I don't know if they really think that or if they're like playing a long they're playing your role maybe yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah we really did uncover though something with the x yeah I know maxi pad tampax maxi pad would have been the first probably yeah and then next and then thanks what is it thanks that's another brand of spanks may go on your they cover your yeah women x because x someone said that someone suggested that in the comments and I think that's brilliant and I don't think that's what it is but that's a brilliant how could you possibly know I'm just trying to imagine the tampax people going like okay let's call it it's it's a tampon but let's let's build on that and let's add x because of the chromosome I just I what's your what's your um you know idea that they wanted to and be a sense of max like max comfort max absorption max freshness max what was the word huh they had the word attached to tampax in the ad we show radiant max radiance but it's like it's tampax yeah not tampax tampax on them I think it's x chromosome that's good it's good we'd have to track down whoever named maxi pad that's the original I bet I bet you can you can do that and come back to us are you do you think they're alive probably their kids are kids of kids okay why are you in a fact I'm going to ask AI if the inventor of maxi pads is still alive okay great is the inventor of maxi pads still alive if people listened to the cte episode with chris nawinski and then also it came up in another episode the pee baby um we had AI make a video of us originally talking about the pee baby the original story of pee baby oh really yeah and we're I'm gonna post it tomorrow but so by the time you listen to this it will be posted and I really really recommend people going to watch this it'll be on our Instagram because for one the story is just you need a good reminder of the pee baby but the AI is hilarious oh I can't wait to see it it's like a version of you and me the AI made versions of us it's so like you made to see yeah were you holding this as a surprise for me no I was just forgot I'm doing stuff you know you got things to do um anyway so check that out check out the pee baby in the AI just reminded me AI okay great did it respond of what it had to do of Mary Beatrice Davidson Kenner an African-American inventor is renowned for her development of the adjustable sanitary belt precursor to the modern maxi pad. Okay, so they really went back. That was 1912. Oh wow. She passed away in '06. So that's off the table. Kenner's invention patented and it is featured a moisture-proof pocket design to hold menstrual pads securely in place, the innovation. Okay, we're in Kenner face racial discrimination. That's a bummer. And of course, it was awarded five patents in summary. Mary B. Just Davis and Kenner passed away. And I was like, okay, so I don't know if we're giving her credit for a maxi pad or she did the belt. Okay. All right, so we didn't learn anything. Nothing. Absolutely nothing. Great. Now, what are the most watched shows on Netflix? This is on Wikipedia. And notoriously, Netflix doesn't really release this information. So or they do it weird. They do it. They'll do like a minute. Like so I just saw this and congrats to do Mal and Minka Kelly. Friends of the power. Handsome Canyon. Handsome Canyon has 2.6 billion minutes viewed. And to put it in perspective, Mobland, which I love and as seemingly a head, everyone I know is watching it had like 580 million. So a four and a half acts of second place. Ooh, but they do minutes, right? So that's an interesting way to to to quantify it. Interesting. As opposed to like households who watched it. Minutes are hours. Minutes. Interesting. Yeah. Okay. Well, this is just Wikipedia. Oh, and it's most popular television series by hours watching their first 28 days. Number one is Squid Game season one. Yeah. Stranger Things. Oh, yeah. Is number two. Three is Wednesday. Okay. Four is Squid Game season two. Mm-hmm. Five is Dommar monster, the Jeffrey Dommar story. Wow. I wouldn't have picked that up just from walking around and people telling me to watch stuff. Yeah. That one's a surprise for me. Six is money heist. That was a big, big show. Yes. I think maybe it was in Spanish, I think. Yeah. I'll turn this on to it. She loved it. Yeah. Oh, wait. No, sorry. That's so six is money. Heist part five. Okay. Interesting. Seven eight and nine are Bridger 10. Season one, two and three. Uh-huh. And then 10 money. Heist part four. Okay. 11 Stranger Things. I need to give money. Heist another shot. It was it was subtitled. Yeah. I think so. I know I would wait. I would watch that. I'm still in ER. Oh, I know when I started, which is so fucking good. The pit. Deli boys. Oh, I wonder if you try. You got to try it. Yeah. I want to. It's such a unique tone that they were pulling off beautifully. Nice. It's fantastic. Cool. I love that. You know, I like discovering these hiccups in my thinking. Uh-huh. And so there's a joke in Deli boys. They have to deal with this Italian mob boss quite often. Uh-huh. And they're Pakistani. And the the the patriarch of not even the patriarch, one of the partners in the criminal organization and older guy, he hates Indians, right? He's constantly talking about he hates Indians. And so he's sitting across from this Italian mobster and he says, um, Pakistani, but I'm telling the truth, Indians are terrible. And the Italian goes, Oh, I thought you were Indian. And he goes, no, I'm not. They are our mortal enemy. And then the mob, the Italian mobster goes, so you guys look identical to each other and you hate one another. And he goes, oh, cookie just got canceled. He's like a then they all laugh the notion of a mobster could get cancelled. Oh, oh, that's funny. But then I was like, I think people do go, how do these two people hate each other so much? They're clearly related. And then I was like, yeah, I would never think that about the Irish and the English. Exactly. The French and the English. Yeah. And then I wanted to people in India are looking at those people going like, wait, you guys are the same people. Why are you fighting? What? I wonder if it's like whatever in group you're in, it seems crazy on the outside. It's always about land and religion often religion, but yeah, who owns what? And it's I mean, that's that's very timely because India and Pakistan were, well, this was obviously made before they now launch missiles at each other. Exactly, but they're in a ceasefire. Yeah. But anyway, okay, Seth McFarlane and Nick that conversation, that's the sad on the SAG after foundation YouTube. Yeah. So you can watch that there if you're interested in animation. Pretty unique conversation. Okay. The seasons of Seth McFarlane shows how many family guy 23 seasons, American dad 19 seasons, Cleveland show four seasons. 46. 46 television. 46 seasons of television. That's really it. That's all the facts. Yeah. Well, Nick Crowe, we love you. Well, there was one. I'm not really a fat. Feeding recovery. He's going to be sick for another 10 years or so. Yeah. Like six, six more years. He's got to be sick. We're not sick anymore. Well, you kind of are, you're still kind of sick. Probably more sick than I was pre kids in general, but like they just stop putting their fingers in each other's mouths and butts and like they just they get a little more separated as they get older speaking of kids. Yeah. I wasn't sure if I was going to bring this up, but why not? Yeah, why not? I said I was racist, you know. Well, no, this isn't negative towards kids. Oh, right. I'm just saying I revealed a lot that I had some vestigial racial thinking that I called myself. Sure. Yeah. Mother's Day, we just had Mother's Day, right? Yeah. It's getting increasingly harder for me. Okay. And I think from for like so many reasons, I feel overwhelming. Yeah. And I'm just tracking that. That it's starting to feel really tough. I'm glad I go home. I go home. I've gone home the last couple of years and it's nice to be with my mom. And I know it makes them very happy. So I like doing that. But there is something about being there. That's hard. When I'm there, especially for moments, events, yearly events, the passage like time starts to feel very oppressive. Yeah. The passage of time. Yeah. You know, we go to the same places and you know, I'm going to this like mall that I went to when I was in high school and to see it be so much the same and also so different. It's just it feels sad. It feels melancholic. Right. And then seeing my parents age is so hard. The lack of permanence to everything. Yes. Yeah. And I can kind of do it as my know. And when I'm not there, I can detach from it when I'm here. And you can keep it time locked in your mind and memory. Yes. And I think I can just compartmentalize and like they're there and that's happening. But I'm not seeing day to day like the little things that are changing. So it's kind of hard to be there even though I'm glad I make that decision. That's a little hard. And then I also know being here would be hard because all of my friends have kids. Yeah. And that is painful in its own way. And like it just feels sort of like this day's hard. Is it painful because you feel like you're missing out on the mothering experience or is it painful because you feel excluded from your friends in a way? Which pain is it? I think it's both. I think it's it's so tricky because it's not like on a day to day I think of the pain of not having children. But on that day, I am a way I'm just very aware that I don't. Yeah. And that it's not it wasn't really a choice. It's just the way my life went. Right. Yeah. Unfolded in this way. I made decisions that took me in certain places. I you know, I'm not married to my high school sweetheart. I didn't have one. You know, and yeah, I'm just like aware like, oh, my life hasn't gone. Didn't go that way. Right. And yes, I can still make decisions that might lead to that. But it's different. It's like really different now. The me having a kid now is a real choice. It is not like, oh, I fell in love with this person. And then maybe we'll have kids. That's the next step. I have to make right now. What do we do? Fuck it. Let's do it. Yeah. It's real, real hard decision making. Yeah. It kind of I don't. Yeah. And that's that's an annoying thing to have to think about. Yeah. So yeah, I guess I just push you closer further. I don't know. Like it, it, it, it, it makes me feel, feel like, oh, I wish I had that. But does it make me feel like I'm going to take those steps [BLANK_AUDIO] Do it? If I were you, I would just want to be crystal clear if it is a desire to have the experience versus the A student in you. I know. That's hard to know, which is driving it, but I think one is worth chasing and one is worth overcoming. Yeah, I know. I don't know. Again, that's a question that I have to ask, that I'm kind of resentful that I have to ask. For example, towards life, I guess, because I know that if I was married and in a partnership, I would have kids. Right. I would want that. Yeah. So. What does a guy in your situation do? What is this 37-year-old guy who can't go get a donor? Well, they could. I mean, yeah, they could, and then they got to get a surrogate, and it's definitely more complicated. You're like, you're a stop at a sperm bank away from having a kid. Well, maybe. Well, maybe because of fertility. Exactly. But you know, like a dude who's not loaded and can't pay for a surrogate and egg and all that stuff. I wonder how they wrestle with it, you know? Yeah. I mean, I assume it's the same feeling and the same thing. Like I guess I have to figure out if I'm gonna, like, just be with a person I don't want to be with, or take those steps. In some ways, I mean, it's all hard, but I think for a man, if they have the means, I mean, a lot of women don't have the means to do any of this either. How much is a sperm donor? That's not terribly. But to your egg, like, you know, do retrievals and it's expected. But let's just say you. You have to remove the eggs in order to make the embryo take the plant. They can put a basterine you into it. Oh, they can try it. They can try it. Yeah. Some people, that works for some people. It's pretty hard for it to take, but it works for some people. But then if that doesn't work, you spent money doing that and then you have to, you know, it's a lot. Right. But for a man, they can make the embryo, you know, they'll take the egg, the sperm, they'll make the embryo and then they'll plant it into a surrogate. Yeah. I imagine that's a pricing endeavor. I'm sure fertility is so expensive. Yeah. Another thing that's like, that's a cost that it wouldn't be a cost. I mean, having kids is an insane cost, right in general, but, um, yeah, diapers, diapers, ding-ding-ding. Like, he went bankrupt. Dipes. Your dipes and they went bankrupt. Yeah. My dipes went bankrupt. Bad for business. Um, anyway, I just thought I would share it because I'm sure it's complicated for a lot of people. Surely. Mother's day. How many reasons carry sent me this incredible post that a girl at our high school had put on Facebook. And, um, she was a great younger than us, I believe. I didn't like, of course, I didn't recognize her right away, but it was this really heartfelt, beautiful post about the complicated nature of Mother's Day and how she basically had to say goodbye to her mom at 16 because the mom of Arizona and the mom was not healthy, mom. And so this girl was living, going to my school, yeah, living on her own, pain for an apartment. She sent it to me because she goes, side note, that's fun. I was once in detention and Dak Shepherd said to me, what they put you in for. Oh, that's funny. And then went on to say, don't worry about all this. Your life's really going to start in two minutes. Okay. And I know mine's not ending here in this detail. Oh, wow. So whether I said that or not, who knows, maybe in her mind, I said that. Um, I'm delighted that on that detention, we had, you know, like a fun, yeah, but it was just a really sweet post in a reminder of like, man, some kids, like the experience can be so right. Kerry sent it to me going, I'm such a fucking asshole for bitching about my two loving parents who, you know, whatever, yeah, but there's kids in your high school that are like, they're supporting themselves, they're living in an apartment. Yeah. And they don't have any parents. Yeah. Um, anyway, well, that's it. All right. Love you.