From Tomorrowland to online hate : NOVAH's powerful evolution

Before we get into this episode of Hellpys Sexed with My Boss, have you grabbed your tickets for the live show yet? The boys have been busy auditioning dancers and sorting out their costume changes, so you just know it's going to be a big one. Expect huge laughs, outrageous stories, unfiltered honesty, and a few surprises thrown in there too. Later this month, William and Jordan are heading to Cardiff, Glasgow, Manchester and London, so head to sexedmyboss.com/live to get your tickets now. I've got some good bits for you today. How do you make the change? Cheeky bastard, are we recording? Did you hear that, G and D, you guys? Did you hear that? I was just doing me notes and I prepping things I want to talk about in today's episode. So I've got some good bits today, and you went, "Oh, that makes a change." Right, well, see, if you've got any good bits for this episode, then probably I don't know. Oh, that'll make a change. Hello and welcome to Help I Sexed my Boss, the podcast where we help you navigate the challenges of modern life. Answering your 21st century questions and finding solutions to everyday dialeners, like, what should you do if you get probed in the wrong hole? Or, how would you tell your mum the outfit she's picked for your brother's wedding is horrid? And what should you do if you've accidentally sexed it, you boss? But we are not your usual agonians. Are we William Huntson? No, we're not, Jordan North. I'm more supercalifragilistic ex-bialidosis, you're more supercalifragilistic extreme halitosis. I told you I got tested, I was all good. What for halitosis? Oh, is that not good? No, that's for another thing. Yes, well, that's from Lear. You know, the surgeon that taught me to do phalus. Doctor Halitosis. No, he's called Halit, I kept calling him halitosis, which is the bad breath one. Halitosis. No, the surgeon was called halitosis. So I called Smith. No, he's called Dr Halitosis. Dr Halitosis, yes, we don't get those confused. Let's do a toast. Fittingly, we're using still the big, Willie distillery gin. This toast is to someone called Willie, but with an i, on the end. Give me a big wrap. Are you back on the drink? Oh, am I? Always unnerving after meeting my boss today. And it's like, it just comes from nowhere. It's like, boss, I'm sure it's nothing, but when your boss says, you want to have a chat this way, you're like, oh, oh, oh, what's happening? So all perfem is becoming a little bit closer. This is it. I've been thinking, God. So just give me a, have a nice, strong, fresh. We're a bit of a dutch courage. Yeah, and we get all and stuff, but now I'm thinking it's really, really wanted to meet this way. Usually we just catch up in the office. Oh, good luck. And I can't get sat kind of pub, can you? I think it would be wrong to do this in the pub, yes. Totally. I don't think that's it. No. They want sat kind of pub, what do they? I mean, neutral grounds. I can't pass, won't work, so you can't get back in the building, I guess. So maybe there's a little trick. Maybe there's a little trick in the building. Well, yeah. Anyway, let's go back to this week's toast. It's to Willie. He message in to say, good morning, Willie von Jordan. It's my 60th birthday on Friday, and I'd be grateful for a shout out on the podcast. I also have a mini dilemma when attending your tour show in Glasgow. Should I wear casual jeans and a t-shirt or come dressed in my guilt, advice gratefully received, regards Willie. Willie, and I'm going to, I'm going to look straight. No, it's an audio first podcast, but I'm going to look straight in the camera for this, because I want, I want easy to put this up. You put this up straight in that camera. Right. Anybody like Willie that is coming to Glasgow, I want you all to come in your kilts. I want as many kilts as possible in Glasgow. I want someone. I'm now thinking why have I not got a task and outfit for, but it's too late. I want people in that H2. We want everyone turning up all the lads, especially for you. But you mean especially for me? Think of all the floppy cups you'll be able to see on the seats. It's quite cold in Glasgow, OK? Willie, we want to see you. Willie, happy 60th birthday. If you're coming to Glasgow and you're listening, I want all the lads to come in kilts as many as possible. Yes. Now, at time of recording, it is Well Book Day. Yes. Happy Well Book Day. Happy Well Book Day. Do you ever do it as a kid? I can't remember doing it. Yes. I'm sure we might have shared it back in the day, but there is an adorable facial graph. Please find it full circle moment, because he went as an on-the-lumpur and on stage with that spray time. You got a lot like him. I don't have phosphorescent green hair. I can't remember doing jeans for jeans day. I don't know the names. Yes. We did chinos for chinos. In my red chinos for. Red cordroid trousers for red cordroid trousers day. Yes. Well Book Day at the time of recording. Yes. And a few people have gone as me, which is very kind of obviously a trice Sunday time as best selling water. And most notably, you're lovely nephew Lucas. Yes. Who has gone as me? He's gone in a lovely blue shirt and some chinos. It's quite an easy costume to do, but what I think geniuses what they've done with their hair. They really. I don't really know what Lucas's hair normally looks like. It looks quite curly. I was it. I'm thinking they've propped it, held it back and he looks very much like you, I think. Oh. Some are canny. Yes. He looks a bit older than I do, but he doesn't see on the face, Ollie. Yeah, obviously. Yeah, he's a two-year-old child. It's two-year-old child. And you're saying for both shocks. You're saying you look younger than it's. You've got better skin than a two-year-old child. Yeah. I'm always true, I'm. No, he looks very sweet. I would have tried the shirt in his main little notes. Oh, yeah. Just, but you know, casual. He's got a little tote bag as well. Yeah, I would have gone a tote bag, which is lovely. And they put a little jump around him. Yes. And he took his book. He looks very smart. I draw him for a book day. I'm not going to mention the radio station in question, but another radio station went as Mary Poppins. They all dressed up as people from Mary Poppins and lots of people sent it to me. Including one of the presenters went as a penguin. Now, I don't want to be that person, but the penguins aren't in the book. They're just in the film. And it is World Book Day. Just. You talk about heart, aren't you? Yeah. Amanda and Jamie. Yeah. Amanda and Jamie were fine. They were Bert and Mary. Actually, Roberts. And the penguin's not in the book. It'll go good. Fine, just leave it there. That's the trouble with World Book Day. People sort of confuse the film in the book and don't realise they're two separate propositions. Have you heard. If you listen to the rest of history. The one on Disney and Mary Poppins, yes. I have started listening to that. Just very good, because she obviously does film that, but she hated the films. She did save Mr. Banks. Very good. But she. Everything she was worried about happened. Like, it turned it into. Yeah, the only thing she. That's a brilliant. The film is brilliant. It is a different proposition to the book. She is a lot more. Mary is a lot more a Serbic in the books than she is perhaps in Julia Andrews' portrayal. However, Mary Poppins returns. Emily Blunt's portrayal of Mary is probably closer aligned to the book Mary. So, if you book out. Oh, I don't like it. It's not the original Mary. It's like, no, no. You mean the original film Mary. Thank you very much. There is also a talking book. There is a very good book called Making Mary Poppins that I suggest people buy if they like all that, which is good. Seeing as we should promote books as last week was World Book Day. Jordan, "Sokereight, the last ever-sokereight. Congratulations for being part of it. How do you feel? 20 years, they've had a good run." So, you and many of the G&Bs have been going. I've been called up for "Sokereight", which is called up. It's not an Astro-Flippin service, love. There it is. You get a call up. You get a call up for England. And to you? Yeah, football. Right. So, look, this is a big, big honor for me. I'm absolutely buzzing. Shit in bricks about it. I'm going to be on the same team as Wayne Rooney and what of, yeah. The England's top goal scorer. Okay. Which is mad. Who else is on the team? Angu-Jinge, Paddy McGinnon. Who? Joe Marla. Angu-Jinge. Who's Angu-Jinge? YouTube that we're answering. No. No. But I'm buzzing. I can't believe the reaction as well. I mean, Dad, I don't know if you heard me, Dad, but like, when I told me that, it was like, "Well, you're playing football, you're crap." And what position will you be? Left back. What's that? Left back in the changing room. I don't know yet. We'll find that out when we do training. Will it be 4-4-2 formation? I know idea. 4-1-3. Don't know. Is that a thing? I can play five at the back. Sorry. It depends. If you've all been there. It's like a satin out for you, that's fine at the back. Right. But I'm buzzing for it. It's been meant and the reaction's been, I don't think I spent so many, like so many people like, "Mate, Mrs Ace." So I'm a very lucky boy. I probably won't get called up next year once they've simply played. But it won't be, won't be. We'll get ready. No one will take it away from me that I've played in an English shirt on the same pitch as wayrooney. So let's give me goose bumps. Look at that. I've got actual goose bumps saying that. It's every, every boy's dream in it. Not every boy's. Not every boy's, but every boy that likes football is a dream to do this. You get to be a footballer for a week. This is like you've been. For a week. Is it for a whole week? You've got to do training and stuff. Oh, jeez. All right. My equivalent for this for me is like you being asked to be Mary on stage for a day. Well talking about Mary on stage. Sexmentofost.com/live. Why? Because I'll be a Mary on stage. You're a Mary Puppet. No, I don't. Oh, you just get another footballer. No, but imagine if someone come up to you and said I want you to be. Yes. Mary Puppet. Is that sort of equivalent in it? It would be my equivalent, I am right. And what charity is it supporting? Socrates. Unicef. Sorry. Unicef. No, unicef. No, service station. Unicef. Unicef. Which generally does great work across the whole world. And they've raised over 100 million Socrates since it's been 20 years ago. Robbie Williams started it. Did he? I mean, to see it twice a month, I've been a paying customer. I went and we made stewies years ago. And then I bought tickets when I. You were going to live in Manchester. Yes. I went with Darrell. Did you? I went with Darrell. No, Darrell couldn't go. So I had to go with someone else from work. I didn't get with James, but I've been twice to watch it. So to be playing in it. Wow. It's mental. And I'm under no illusions. And when is it? May and the May. What's the setter? You know, a city. No, like Mr. An open goal. Oh, yeah. So, okay. Well, that breaking leg, just a breaking leg on football. I have a good game. Good game. Not a good game. No, have a good match. Have a good match. Play well. Will I be able to watch the highlights on match of the day? No, but it's on the telly and you can come along if you want. Match of the day, eh? Oh, no, that's not on anymore. I can come along if you want. Okay. I can come along. Oh, let me just see what's going on. You know what? It's well-watt. It's so liberating about it. Yeah. People go, oh, have you got any tickets? And I'm like, no, it's a charity. By you. I wish you'd use that. We should use that. We should use that with your mum. And I'll show. Oh, god. Don't get me started on the sex with the tickets. I'm out of going to a wedding at the weekend. No, for God's sake. Goddough and offered quite a lot of people tickets. Well, you just say I'm sorry, but they probably won't remember that. I even give someone my number. But yeah, it's just a shame to say I just showed you. I went to congratulations, Tom and Jen, who listened by the way. Congratulations, Tom and Jen. I went to that wedding at the weekend. Yes. Did you wear your summertime ball suit? Did you wear a different one for a different suit? Honestly, yeah. So I'll proper looking for it, because I'm not sending mates from back home all week. I'll proper looking forward to it. And it would better than what I was imagined. Just seeing all my own mates having a laugh with you. And they took pace out on me and stuff. And as well, you know you're getting old. Some of these mates run like second, third, fourth kids. Yeah, so now one of them's up to snip. Yeah, told me all about it as well. Oh, okay. Yeah. So one of them's that snip. I've been bought into getting a time share on a caravan. And there's a few more to add to it, guess what? So yeah, we need to know. Well, it sounds like a very productive wedding. A little update. After the second worst week of my life last week, yesterday just before I came to meet you, I was rearranging some bins because some bin liners had been put into the wrong bin by someone else and so I was sort of moving them over. And also the recycling, you can't recycle in the bags. You have to empty the loose stuff into the bin. There I am emptying this recycling bag into the bin. And what is looking at me covered in dust, tearing up my old passport. Absolutely delighted. I was absolutely delighted. I do have a new passport now. Why did you check the bit that's a first? Because it was not a bin in the house. It was like, it was a bin under loads of other bins. I'm not rifling through a bin like sticking it up. You know, I've only bins I've been through in my life. I've had two rounds. Bank cards. Yes, but I am the same. You. I have been all sorts of them. I've been bloody tickets before now. I've not been the passport, but I've been bank cards. Can I just say? No, no, no, no, no, I would check every hour and hour. So that's a last thing I do think I better check the bin. But I have not been to the passport. I think it was. It fell into a bin by someone else. You gave it a say? Maybe someone who was overzealously dusting. You think it was your cleaner? It was a temporary cleaner. She's not coming back, not because of the passport. But that cemented it. Anyway, the absolute delight that I was. My mother's positive spin was, at least you got all your stamps. I don't care about the bloody stamps. The aggro I went through when I lost my passport. You know, of all the places I've been. Well, would you keep your passport? You can do, yeah. I mean, I wasn't that fast. It's mainly sort of just America and other places. Yeah, it has been quite a tough week. Yeah, that's where you went. Oh, shut up. You weren't that fast. I was so sorry. I thought you were going to be a bitch. No, I was going to say, last week you were very good, but you just, you could tell you going through it a bit. That's very nice. Well, our friend Joe, message me today, it was an excellent episode of Sexed last week. And I said, really, I said, I thought I was completely off the boil. Thank you very much and do you. Me? Yeah, I'm up and down. But that's the last of the life of a woman. More of a simmer. Life of a performer. Life of a showgirl. That's the life of a showgirl. It is. Me, I'm up and down. You don't know. I thought, yeah, you're always on phone. Oh, bless you. Thank you very much. You're like, who's a good footballer, it's always on phone. I say James B. Tieri Henri. Yeah, Tieri had good fun. I'm trying to think, who's always on good phone? Because there's not anything I'm going to say. Maradonna. Harland? No, your man from Liverpool. Michael Owen. No, defender Liverpool. Stephen Gerrache. No, anyway, you're always on good phone. Oh, bless you. That's very kind of you. In other news, we've recorded, in fact, you can listen to it now, I believe. It's out this week. We went to go and record where there's a will, there's a wake with the lovely Margaid Reuch. And whilst we were recording that, we had this epiphany and the more I think about it, I think we might be onto something. Question for Jean-Deevers. Am I the Queen Mother? Because the Queen Mother, all she did all day was host lunch and dinner parties, drink Jean and Abona and Marr Tini's, watch Keeping Up appearances and have surrounded herself with homosexuals. We were, it is basically, it is my life. Yeah, so William was asked if he'd come back to someone who would be and you set the Queen Mother. And then I realised I don't need to come back as the Queen Mother because I already had the Queen Mother. I didn't realise to travel all day, I didn't think. Well, all her stuff, you know. And she didn't work and stuff, did she? I mean, she was Queen Consul, yes, she did work actually, but then once her daughter took over in 1952, then yes, she did a bit, but sort of laterally, you know, all she did was throw lunch parties and dinner parties as a Clarence House, lovely life. Didn't she have loads of debts when she died as well? She did, yeah. We're talking, was it about a million, I think, more than 100,000? It was more, it was a lot of millions I think, yeah. It was it of what? I mean, horses and stuff. Mainly on horses. Similarity's end because horses don't really do much for me. She bet on, she had over a million pounds in debt on horses. Yeah. Good going, as it were. Lurdy Nora, I'll play to her. Anyway, so I do think, you know, in the right light, if I put a hat on and sort of had a little corgi next to me, I think I could sort of, you know, be an impersonator. Well, remember that lovely thought, because I've got a bond to pick. Yeah. Some of it's been happening a while now and I just think we need to stop this. And this is coming from a friend who loves you daily. Oh, God. Okay. Right. And it's just some good advice. Okay. Right. Now, I know you're living your 20s. Yeah. In your 30s, right? We've established that over in a past few weeks. You are at the moment living your best life. You're out more than cut. You're literally like a fab. You're out in so-o every week. I mean, okay. I'm not wrong, Emma. Where we live on out. So, thank you. All right. You're living your- you're doing now watching the City of London, if you're referring to that particular incident. You're now doing what you didn't do in your 20s. Yep. Okay. Babes. William. Yes, darling. Hi. Please stop using the School of Margy. The Dead School of Margy. It's cool. With 36, use the left in a Margy. Use the side left in a Margy. I'm sick of messaging. You're not- you're not Gen Z. Gen Z, what- is he? What do you use? There we go. School of Margy. I'm cool. Yes, please. Right? You're an Etica expert. You're 37. But I'm also doing it slightly ironically. I- I've noticed, and I've just so many types- literally, we message more stays. I just- either reply with the Dead Margy. Yeah. Just put laughing, sideways laughing or laughing a Margy. Or should I just type hilarious, which I always think comes across as, I haven't even laughed. Yeah, you would find that- I'd find that thing. Yeah. Oh, well, I'm sorry. You know what? If you want to do it, do it. But I know you're hanging around with a lot of younger, cooler people at the moment and stuff, so I get it. You know? They're hanging around with me. I- I said broadly over the day, because of the gym all the time. So it happens. These people rub off on you. I say- Well, they- You ask nicely. If you keep going into those showers, they will. I've started saying- I've started saying lunch instead of dinner. You know, it happens. It happens. We change. Wouldn't you, that I got me for sitting that the other day, is he said? My- I went- I'm sorry, I went out for my dinner. Right. Okay, I will try and find- maybe- You don't like the Mollet? I don't like the Scolomogies. No, it's true. It's just how we are. Yeah. Okay, and we're both entitled to our opinion. I will try now, particularly when I message you or any group that you are in, I will try not to use dead. Just- Which means, for those that don't know, the Scolomogie is Gen Z sort of- laugh in the fall. I'm laughing so much. I'm dead. I've died. I've died laughing, dead. Or, Gen Z off say, "I can't, babe. I'm dead." As in, that was so funny. Is that right, is it? Yeah. Cops in the. Her, Cops in. Cops in is more of a stage term for when you're on. for example, if we're on stage and you do something so. Oh, if you're doing something serious and then I sort of get the giggles, that's an I laugh behind you. That's called Cops in, upstaging and away. Okay, well, I will stop using the Scull emoji. Good to know. Also, Gen Divas, at some point this week or maybe next week, Jordan and I just need to find a date. We're going to do an Instagram live stream, aren't we? Yes, we are. We're going to do a live stream. We haven't done one in a while. I'd like to do one on a Friday, ideally, but if you can't get that in, we'll get, we'll think of a date. Okay, okay. We'll put it on our Instagram. So, if you want to join in and just have a little chat with us, send us a message. We will do that on our IG channels. Are we going to do that on our respective channels, me or me, yours and yours, all the sex to the account? If we do on the sex to the account, we've got both got to be in the same room. How? What do you mean how? Can't you add me on, you've got this. Well, I don't want to do sex with my boss and Jordan North. It's either going to be William Hanson and Jordan North, all the sex to my boss and we're both sitting next. Oh, I've not followed that. No. I didn't think it's right. I think I can just do it as William and Jordan. Okay. That would be my suggestion. Can you do a three-way Instagram or not? No, that's the way it's William and Jordan. Yeah. Because if we could do three-way, who can I have produce the band? Who, by the way, is not here. He's on holiday. Oh, sure. Yeah. He's skiing. Oh, yeah. That's going to go in past some of the skis. I can imagine him skiing. The thought of it, which gives me the egg. What? Your honesty, you're so harsh to band. I mean, it says me. But, you're. Excuse me. I'm actually friends with band. It's all you to be fair. But I'm actually off all this. One we're not being pun to mind. We're pun to mean to him. Oh, no, we're not. Oh, yes, we are. But yeah. He wrote your text on this rate. Oh, that's nice. He said he's a lovely picture. He saved his number yet. He meant cat on the slopes of a pint. Cute. That's nice. Any more for anymore? Just quickly. Where are we with buying house gifts for other people? So I don't. Well, like a housewarming. But like ornaments and so on. But do you know what? You don't see these days ornaments. Not enough ornaments. I grew up with ornaments. Got out if you kicked a ball in our families living room. Well, you shouldn't be doing that. But like proper. You know, proper figurine ornaments. You don't see ornaments anymore. No, opposite dark. Yeah. What's habitationary? What's that? That's hankerchiefs. What's a cushery? What? A cushery. No, it's not a word. A coutremo. Yeah, what's. No, no, no. I don't do. I don't do ornaments. Nicknecks. Bibblos. Brick of Bracks. Brick of Bracks. Like, I don't think I'd buy you something for your home, because what if it wasn't to your tape? No, I would say it's like buying art. You don't want to. So you should always avoid it. Like, by. Unless I've said I specifically want X, then yeah, I would avoid it. I do. Yeah. Why are you thinking of getting something for someone? Yeah, just for someone for the house and I thought, well, what if I buy this and they don't like it? And then they've got to do that thing where you've got to get it out of here. Or you give it, but you always put the gift for a seat. Ah, okay. So they can just deal with it and not tell you. Okay. That would be what I would suggest. I'll be honest, I was recently given a gift and what was it? Right, this kind of sound harsh, but I was recently given a lovely cussion for my grandma, but it wasn't to my taste. So now I'm thinking, God bless her. Yeah. She's seen it on offer. Well, look, she's seen a happy place, Pellar and TK Max. But now I sound awful. Do I sound like a knob? Right. And I just think, I don't know how I'm going to put that in the house. I've tried putting it everywhere. Now it's going to be one of those things that I have to get out. There's room in my bin. Now I've taken a bus. Don't be our report. I just mean grandma. So I'm trying to find a place for it. But I just think, yeah, do I sound like I have the children? No. No. I was, you know, certain thing. You get given things. You're like, I don't want that. I've said this before, my friends. I will not be an ex. It's my grandmother. My friends at school gave me two zebra finches. What are they? Birds. Live birds for a birthday. Who gives animals as a birthday present? Yeah, I send this in TK Max. I'm just that to get it. And it's a happy place. But which I want mind bleeds, just not the right. I'll see. Doesn't fit in a lot of sequins. Yeah. She knows you're so well. Anyway. Yes. So you just made me think. And I thought I bought people loads of stuff for their house. And they probably thought, well, give me a hand. Every time Jordan comes out, I know. Those flying ducks she gave me for up our wall. They've gone. I thought you liked them. No. Okay. No. You've got actually, for my house away, you've got a cellophila candle. Which is very nice. You can't go wrong with a candle. Well, as long as you know, they like that scent. Because there are certain candles that I think smell absolutely horrid. Shit, is it Jolk of the Week? Jolly Jolk of the Week? Jordan, that's how it works. I did not want to tell you. Well, because, you know, for about you were told for years. When was that told, please? Tuesday. Receipts. I think they opened the group chat. My absolute favorite thing that you do. I'm like, this is that you know me, Jordan. This is that with absolute love. Is where you ask a question. You did this to social Joe this week. And you went, which of these photos are you using, Joe? You had asked that question the day before. And she had responded to it. And then you asked it again. And then you just literally scroll up one message and there is the answer. It's just very amusing. Okay, well, it's you weren't listening. I were listening. I was, I just, I know, a job puts up a lot. She does. She deserves a medal. I've got some jokes here. Maybe she deserves a sequined happy place cushion. She can always think of you when she sits on you. Okay. Do we do my jingle first or after that, right? I've got to see. Honestly, I mean, do you ever listen? I can't remember. We do it before. All right. I come after you go before. All right. Cue the jingle, please. If you like a chap, lose cheeky and northern, you're in for a treat. Buh, buh. With our Jordan, and if a pig is what you see, just short to love, Jordan's jolly joke of the week. (chiming) Oi. All right, then Jean, (laughs) You know, you really are living in 20s, aren't you? All right, then Jean Devers. This one was sent from Sean Ed on Instagram. Thank you, Sean. I recently had my penis in the Guinness Book of Records. And I'll tell you the punchline after the break. Right, then Jean Devers, I'm sticking with us. It's time for the punchline of Jordan's jolly joke of the week. This one's from Sean. He said I recently had my penis in the Guinness Book of Records. Well, until the librarian told me to take it out. It's not that dumb. No. He sent a few in. He sent four in. Oh, good. I got the name. Oh, good. Sorry, I've had to be up beat. I've got the name Amy Tatoole on my penis, but when I'm erect, it says, "Altho-tamachutti." It's a town in Scotland, apparently. Sean's been a theme to Sean's joke so far. (laughs) I recently got my liquid Viagra mixed up with my ticket, TIPX. Ended up with a big correction. (audience cheers) It's good. Me and my friend were going to a fancy dress party. We dressed up as a pair of breasts, although we dropped out last minute. So he left me there looking like a rite tit. (laughs) There we go. I like the last one. Yeah, very good. Sean, I would talk to you therapist. There we go. Look, it's only one more week until we start our tour. I am so excited. We're a week away. I'm so excited. I've got done. I'm starting to get nervous now. Yeah. And 50 p. 20 p. Oh. Yeah. If you're coming to one of our reenest shows, remember we need your help, because the show isn't just us. And mainly us. But it isn't just us. You guys. Yeah, and me. We need you as much as you need us. Cardiff London Glass-Gayman, so that's the order, Jordan. What do we need from them? All right, there's a few things we need. We need your dilemmas. And we also need a reason you deserve a shout out. Or just a reason you should be up on stage with us. So if you've got a funny story, some that's outrageous that's happened to you, getting touched. Yes, anything that's outrageous that would shock us surprises, that obviously you don't mind an arena full of people hearing all about. Or if you have a special moment in your life coming up that we could help you bring to life on stage, let us know. We've talked about the proposal we had in Sheffield at Crosswise. I am quite keen on having a lifebirth at some point. We could see what else we could do. Mass of a lifebirth. Well, maybe just to the side of the stage. Oh, so. You don't want to the dancers slipping on embryonic fluid. A few weeks ago when we showed you a funny, yeah, went a funny colour. I just like, and people thought you were playing up to it. Yeah. Can you imagine seeing a funny, real, and Ed coming out of it? A little baby's Ed. Well, I'd look away. I mean, maybe we just point that to the audience. Yeah, fair enough. I wouldn't. I don't see that. Sexandmyboss.com/contact for any of these. Just make sure you select the light that you join us on tour. Sexandmyboss.com/gynercology or any of those. Sexandmyboss.com was that contact. And yeah, if you join us on tour, so if it's at Cardiff London Glasgow Manchester, get in touch. And we might see you on stage. Yes. And when you go to that URL, select the night that you're joining us on tour. So, you know, we don't announce, oh, there's going to be a birth. And actually, it's not that night. We need to know which night you're coming. Right then. Now we have a few questions and dilemmas. Remember, we have no idea what's coming up. So, well, we've got first place, will I? It's first dilemma. It's from Olivia. Hello, wonderful sex to team. I have an etiquette question. I know you've had enough poo inquiries, but we need help with our workplace debate. We are mostly a group of girls who discuss things that are definitely far too TMI. As we were discussing poo samples, I stated the best way to collect the sample would be to cover the toilet bowl in an Uphlu roll and then collect said sample. However, my coworker said she wraps toilet roll around her hand and then catches her bowel movement for taking the sample for her hand. I've never thought of this. I think this is wrong, but she thinks this is far more efficient. So, what is the etiquette on collecting your own poo sample? Thank you for all the laughs. I love listening to you all every week. Olivia. Can't you do it in top order? Yeah, don't you do it in a little sort of, yeah. I don't know. I've never had to do this. And you shouldn't be embarrassed because like doctors see this all the time. But how do you do it? Do you like. I think putting it in and then chop it up and put it in. I don't. Let's put it this way. Olivia, both of the examples that you've had given, both yours and your friends, I think are wrong. Yeah, I think just if possible, do it straight into top, whatever it is. What? Tub? I don't know what I've done. You mean the loo? No, because you've got to take it in, aren't you? Maybe you're being scooped out. Do you have a jelly and a keyfuser look at people? I do. What was that all about? I don't know. It's a funny on sausage. But yeah, I. I personally would do it straight in. If not. And if you consider just asking a health professional? Yeah, my. Which we are neither. My other top tip would be to cling film the top of the toilet. Put it on it like that. I remember doing that for an April Falls prank. You got to get the cling film. Now we laughed. No, no, no, you got to get the cling film really tight. It looks like a floating shit. It's like, "Oh my god, what's going on?" And we did it with my dad. He's gone. He found it funny with mum then. Anyway, yeah. The point is, I'd do it on cling film. Well, there we go. Our next dilemma is from anonymous high boys, I need some advice. So late last year, I came out of a 14-year relationship. In a moment of post-stumping delusion, I decided I was that girl and went on a date to a week later. Delusional behaviour. Yes, I know. Lesson learned and ever again. I'd rather be on my own if the kind of people available at this. Nick won. He has a nut allergy. I don't think that's a nick. See, is he right? You know, not Allidians are very serious. Yes, they are. Life's not even. I know. I bought a bag of Reese's cupcakes once. Flight to Spain, I thought, do that. Watch a place it's sun. I like to watch a football go on holiday to get me in mood. We're looking forward to the Reese's and it's. Tonight, excuse me, something on this plane, as I remember serious. My father told me, "Yes, I will." So, I can't be doing peanut butter cups. And I did ask. But you firmly so now. But equally, I've been on flights where they've announced that and then they come around to go complimentary nuts. And you go, "Sorry, you've just done an announcement." It's so delicious. It's very serious. Yeah. Sorry to anyone, but you're not Alligé. Yes, that Jordan North is not speaking on behalf of this podcast. So you certainly hasn't got an Alligé. See you in court. I'm bloody wind. You've got to prove me wrong, bitch. Iqwan, he has a nut allergy. I don't know why, but it just did something to me and made my vagina shrug up. Like the nuts if he debuffes. I felt like I'd have to carry an epic pen instead of lip gloss. The romance was fading fast. Anonymous. I don't think you're a very nice person. I do, I think this is hilarious. Second, he has asthma. Oh, yes. Hilarious. This is the poor sod. This is why I love Argy and Divas. Because this is, let's be honest, some people listening to this now think this is really mean. But others are like, this is exactly what you make would say to you in a pub. If you were just a few and a few mates having a beard, but like, right, I know she'd be like, I know I saw like an absolute bitch, like a tall cow right now, but anyway, go on. Again, nothing wrong with it, but why did I immediately picture myself faming him gently during a light jog, him puffing on his inhaler and me on my vape just to get through the situation? I could be friends with this, do you, Divas? I don't think your lung is any better if you're vaping. But the absolute final nail in the coffin was the conversational lack of. The man looked me dead in the eyes and asked me my favourite colour. Oh, jeez. I said mine. He said his baby blue. Yeah, get rid. Say no more. Get rid. Do you know I nearly wore a baby blue temperature today? Say no more. I made my excuses and left. Fourteen years I gave to a man and this is what I've come back out to. Nut alleges in hailers and baby blue. So my dilemma is, am I being unreasonable or was the universe protecting me? Look, you're being slightly unreasonable, but that's fine, hon. Because I'm sure you've got problems, anonymous. But you know, and it is a universe protecting you. And just get back out there. Like just, I would say two weeks so after coming out of a 14 year relationship is too early to be dating. Just get back out there when you're ready and you'll meet the right person. I know that sounds really obvious to say, but you will. Yeah. Very funny dilemma. I've got a friend who always asks his opening question on dates. I want you to figure out colour. Why? I don't know. I don't think it's a particularly good question, but we tease him that that's just. Mine would be film. I feel like it gets an all-year favourite film. Okay. Like yours is very popular. Correct. That's like. And then that opens a big question because it'd be like, "Oh, and then you could say. " "I'd actually think of Hopp and Return." Yeah. Yeah. Exactly. "What do you guys favourite film?" "What's going on?" Oh, interesting. "It's still a mind-cue and to see this." That says a lot about you as a person. I could chat to you about that. That's very interesting. I couldn't finish it personally. But that's because I'm thick. You get a bit lump. A bit of film. Love actually. Yeah, there you go. Stuart. Hesprey. Hesprey. Yay! Is it really Hesprey? No. Fair play. He's saying no. He's nodding his head. Let's see. Mine good fellows. Right. Basin. Yeah. There you go. So I'd ask him that. Yeah, okay. This is from another anonymous one. High Boys, I just want to start by saying how much I adore the podcast and thank you for always making me laugh even during the tough times. I see. Now for my dilemma, what is the etiquette around remaining social media friends with your friends X? Good one. I can't believe you've not had this before. For context, my friend and his girlfriend have been split up for a couple of years. It was not a particularly amicable breakup and they are now blocked on all of each other's social media. I have a remain a social media friend/follower of the X. My friend was, and I believe still is, aware of this fact and wasn't bothered about it when we discussed it a while ago. Should I actively unfollow/unfriend the X or keep things as they are as they're just not harming anyone? I think this is a tough one. Unless your friend said, can you unfollow him? Hmm. Then I would. If you got on with this person. I think it depends on how they broke up. If it was some sort of awful toxic breakup, I think you've got to say, who do you want to be more friends with? Yeah. Your friend or their ex? Deep down and on it might annoy him a bit. Yeah, and they probably have notice. And they probably have noticed. And if you unfollow them, unless you're really close, it kind of just sets the person like, we're not meant to be in each of us lives anymore. So again, I wouldn't follow him if it had been messy and I was on my friend's side. Even though they said we're not bothered. It also depends on whether the X, because sometimes I follow people, regardless of whether I know them, who don't really post. And then suddenly when they post, you go, who the heck's that? So if they're a regular poster, I think you have more of a say and sort of unfollowing them. But if they really don't post, it's not really that much of an issue. That's said, question for you. There are a couple of people in your past life that I'm still following. What would you like me to do? I honestly don't care. Okay. I'd generally go through my head when I say that again, they don't post very often. I'm like, do I unfollow? Let me help to be like. Well, my following account would drop by, right? Eight. So what would you like me to do? Well, can we not discuss this on the podcast, please? Okay. But I'm genuinely not bothered, genuinely. Pop it. You tell your face. Pop it from one. Right, we're not doing this. Come on. We're not doing this on this podcast. We'll do it afterwards. Yeah. That would jump. This next one is from Olive. About a gently, I'm not bothered. Yeah, yeah, actually. No, I'm not bothered. I'm not bothered. Faith bothered. Hello, William Jordan, E.P.B. A few years ago, I had a situation ship, slash friends with benefit arrangement with a guy I met at a club. Let's call him Sam. This didn't really go on for too long, if I'm honest. There weren't many benefits on my side of the deal. Things ended when his friend, let's call him Joe. With my city head feelings for me, I told Joe that I wasn't interested in him and that I wasn't actually looking for a relationship in general. The guy I was sleeping with then told me it didn't feel right to continuing things as he felt the reason I turned Joe down was because I had feelings for him. Sam. Very self-centered, I know. I told Sam that this wasn't true and that I didn't want a relationship with anyone at that point in time just as I had told Joe. Later that night, I received a phone call from Sam at 3am. He proceeded to tell me about all the women he had slept with and listed them in the order of who gave the best head, the best pan job, and the best overall shag. I didn't make the list, but that's okay as he didn't make my list either. Luckily, I'm now with someone who knows where the cliff is. Oh, go on, girl. My etiquette question is this, what should you do when someone you have slept with decides to rank the women or partners they've been with and you don't make the list best wishes, Olive? It sounds like you've done well together. Yeah, Olive. He sounds like a dick. He also sounds like he's very drunk on the call to 3am. And also, if I went to 3am, 3am, yeah, put your phone on silent, turn it off. But, no, what's the etiquette? There is no etiquette, you shouldn't do that. No, and also, I would say the fact that he felt the need to actually phone you instead of list that in a really vindictive toxic way probably means that actually he does actually have some sort of feelings for you because the opposite of, yeah, okay, I'm being told by Izzy that by Gen Z clicks, what are these called? This one's like, Clap. Snap. And this one's, no, like, okay. No, you need to describe what you're doing. You're going to clip this up. I know. So, this one means. That's index finger and thumb. That is. Like, that's clapping, isn't it? And then, what's that one? That's like. That's like, slay. Slay. So, the middle finger and thumb is like, yeah, girl, slay. And that one's clapping, like, yeah, okay. Right. And what's wrong with just clapping? Or, indeed, language. Well, Jack Queen's can't because of nails and also. They can clap, like that. Apparently, it can trigger some people's outclaps. Yeah, the fact that he's phoned you up and felt the need to do that. Clearly, Shosie has got some sort of affection for you. However, get rid of him. Block his number. Don't speech him. Water toxic individual. Top five shags go. Come to your head. You're in number three. We met last night. Ben two. Ben's above me. Yeah, well, on that occasion. And is he number one? That's not happened. No. In any context, everyone. Oh, no, sorry. Move everyone down. Mike, number one. I'm sorry. I'll kill you, you're like, oh, shit. I'm a good shag. I'm a good ride. You know what I'm? Right, good ride. Right, our final dilemma, crashing on. Hi, William and Jordan. How do I tell women about my model train collection? I spend a fortune on them. When I tell women about it, some like it. But with others, I think it's giving them the egg. Please help. That's from Rod Stewart. He's got big train collection. Right. I actually think that. Does he? Um. Does he, really? Oh, come on. He's well known. Rod Stewart is not well known. He has a big train collection. It's a little home bee. Is he Rod Stewart? I'm a dad up. He is. He's well known. He's like. I did model railway club at school. Finally, did you actually. I was year seven. Of course. I then did stamp collecting club. Because I didn't want to do anything sort of possibly physical. Those are the options. Okay. Well, look, Phoenix, I think. I personally think it's quite cute that you're into that. S'lovely. Maybe don't tell them on the first date because your words, not mine, is given some the X. So it's 50/50. Yeah. Um. They need to get to know you outside of trains. Yeah. But promise me this. Yeah. If after the third date. If you get one. They come round and you take them into your garage to show them your train. Except. Please, for the love of God Phoenix, don't wear the little hat. When you please. Phoenix. Honestly, Phoenix brings them round and goes. Would you like to see my pen delino? They're very disappointed when they get to see model row. Don't wear the little hat that all the train collectors wear. Do that in your own time. True. But not for another girl because I reckon that would give many girls the egg. But also don't let them put you off. You be you, huh? Yes, exactly. They've got to love you for who you are. If you're into your steam trains, like Rudge Stewart. Yes. Funny that I am sailing. This is an I am steaming. steaming drunk for her. I am steaming. Hmm. Don't sing me down for the rites. Well, thank you for all those problems, AngelEmys. I remember you can listen to new episodes. I've been choosing Friday and 24 hours before anywhere else on Global Player. And of course, you can watch us on YouTube as well. Put the full episodes up on every release day. Just head to YouTube and search for. Sex Day. We'll see you on Friday. Good bye.