Financial Audit's Most Evil Father

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Savings not guaranteed. Paid membership with connected payment account required. See Experian.com for details. Wait, why the f*** were you taken away? I was taken at 7. My sister was 5. What the f*** did you do to her? He right-hooked my face when I was 4 and broke my nose. That never f***ing happened. It did happen. Why would I remember it? Why would my nose be permanently damaged from it? The anger gets pretty explosive. Sometimes he does black out. Did Mike abuse you physically? Right before my 16th birthday, he dropped a knife on my arm and I've gotten an inch-long scar. She's narcissistic, egotistical, and a f***ing b***h. F***y, f***y, mentally handicapped woman and got her pregnant. Something delicious is coming. Something that's gonna change the way you eat and the way you spend. My new cookbook is almost here. And the first 1,000 people to sign up for a Dollar Wise annual plan gets a signed copy. Click the link in the description below to be the first in line. I want you to be on the next episode of Financial Audit right here in Austin, Texas. If you think you have interesting finances with an interesting personality or a story or a life or relationship, I will personally pay you to take time off of work, fly you down to Austin, get you personal transportation, a hotel, food, and we'll have a great time hanging out. Go to calebhammer.com slash apply or click that link in the description below. Hi, I'm Rose. I'm 20. Hi, I'm Angel. I'm 42. Hi, I'm Mike. I'm 59. We live in Des Moines, Iowa. And this is Financial Audit. Okay, it's an interesting collection of people. Okay, is this a three-generation thing? Daughter, mother, and then grandfather? No. This is my husband. We got married. Oh, okay. We got married when I was 21 and he was 38. Okay, sure. You guys do it. I didn't think I was 38. You were 38. You sure? Yes, because my dad said you had to be under 40. And I distinctly remember that. Okay, you were shooting up, he was shooting down. Yes. It's okay. Does it matter? I don't know. Not really, but. Nah, nah, she's an adult. I don't really give a shit what consensual adults do. Okay, so okay, and then. This is our daughter. Their daughter. Okay, both of y'all's daughter. Yes. So you guys made her. Okay, got it. Okay. Interesting situation. We have had parents and a daughter once before, and it was a crazy episode, so I'm very curious to see what I learned in this one. What's going on? Who's the person? Are you the person? I'm the person. What's going on? What's going on? So about June of this year, I decided to leave. Oh, him? Mike? Sorry, Mike. I decided to leave Mike. Oh, you. Dude, you're a boomer, and you're getting left? You're cooked. Okay. And I left Mike, and then when I left, I put myself about $38,000 in debt trying to maintain a new home, and also a lot of frivolous. Frivolous spending. That's stupid. She left you. Am I sympathetic, or am I not sympathetic? Oh, daughter of yours. I'm not really sure. Okay, well, you're not sure. You're shaking your head, no? I kind of pushed her. Just a little bit. Your mother to leave your father? Okay, well, that's a pretty extreme thing to do for a kid. I understand that, but I had my reasons. Okay. Very much so. I'm sure we'll go into them. I guess, Angel, what do you do for a living? For a living? I am a store manager of a retail location. Well, that's probably. Well, actually, no, that can make money. We've had some people on this show that make good money doing that. What do you make? $52,720. Decent, but you're in Des Moines. I don't know the cost of living, but I would assume lower compared to most of the United States' major cities. Between $2,000 and $3,000 a month. What? Like, if you rent a property, it's about $2,000 to $3,000. No, f*** you. Are you f***ing kidding me? No, you can go cheaper than that. You can go cheaper than that in Dallas. You can go cheaper than that in Austin. What are you talking about? Rent for like $720. Okay, you don't need a two-bedroom. Do you have more kids? Well, she lives with me. Her fiancé lives with me. Oh, well, you're an adult. You're an adult with a fiancé lives with you. They can kick their ass out. Yeah. And then one more. You're 20. You got a fiancé. Daughter, so. Okay, and how old's the daughter? She's 18. Okay, you don't need them. They're adults. They can go do their own thing. Right? Yeah, I agree. Well, this is why you're pushing her, because you live with her. Would you be so in there if you weren't living with her? Oh, absolutely. Absolutely. Absolutely. I would have pushed regardless if I was with them or not. What's your per paycheck amount? And how frequently is that paycheck? So, I'm paid salary, and my paychecks are $761.34 a week. Okay, times 52 divided by 12. Average it out. Average in $3,299 a month and 14 cents. Obviously, some months you get more paychecks, some you get a little less. That's how it works. And then bonuses. So, do you live with Mike? No. Okay, what do you do for a living? How have you been? Have you been left in the dirt a little? A little bit. What do you do for a living? I build custom windows. Okay, not for long, I assume. What do you make doing that? Every two weeks, I'll bring home approximately $1,140-some. Are you surviving now that she's left you? I mean, that's a little difficult. Do neither of the daughters live with you, though? No. Okay. Okay, so you're making $2,290 a month. Are you surviving? More or less. Really? How? I don't buy a lot of the stuff that I want. I only buy necessities. He's been eating burgers for three months straight. Okay. Man's eating well. I don't know. Kind of. What? He doesn't buy a lot of food. He literally eats burgers. Well, dude's living his bachelor's. He's living his bachelor's life out there now. You're slaying all that corn pussy? No. Nope. Bachelor life, man. Have some fun. Get out there. Did you see this coming, or were you blindsided? I was blindsided by it. Really? Okay. All right, so I guess we may as well. I guess, Rose, I should collect yours, because you should actually go live on your own. We have a lot of ranches going off on this one. I'm a barista at a coffee shop. You look like it. Yeah, that makes sense. Okay, what do you make? I make $800 every two weeks. Do you have anything going for you in life? Not at the moment. Just a lot of stuff happened about three years ago. I'm still trying to recover from it financially. What happened to you? You look like the person that claims everything happens to them, but does anything ever actually happen to them? Yes, I was kicked out of my adoptive family's house before I was 18. Adopted family? Yeah, so when she was. What's wrong with you guys? You guys, you got a bad family? No. Well, I don't think so, but the courts seem to think that because. The courts? Yeah. Well, you were kicked out at 18. You're an adult. No, I was kicked out at 17. Okay. Before I turned 18. I was kicked out two months after I turned 17. Why? I was being a teenager, drinking, vaping. So it was you. It was me. Okay. Then they ended up taking a lot of my money away from me and sending me on my own. What does that mean? How did they take your money? Joint account with my adoptive mother. How much did they take? She took $4,000 from me. Yeah, that's not great, but most people don't have that much money at that age. No, I had $7,000. I'm sorry that happened. It's a setback, but I don't understand why that means you should work. How many hours a week do you work now? I work full-time. I work almost 40. Okay. So that doesn't mean. I have sympathy for that, I do. But you said that's the reason you don't have a lot going for you right now. Yeah, they. That shouldn't hold you back forever. They kicked me out of high school. They pulled me out of my high school. That doesn't make any sense. Who did? My adoptive parents. They can't do that. They pulled me out of my co-op because they were paying for it. So they made me pay for the rest of it. Kick out of high school? They can't kick you out of high school, your parents. It's homeschool. Homeschool co-op. Oh! So they were paying for it. So why didn't you go to school then? I didn't go to school. That would have been weird. I was bullied a lot in middle school, so they felt that I needed a change. Oh, no, no. I mean, why didn't you go back to high school and just. My credits don't transfer to any public schools, so I'd have to start over at 17 as a freshman. Then was it valid? That's the question. We don't know. We don't know if it's actually valid. I called- Well, they sound like pieces of shit, I'm sorry, but you can just get your GED and- Right. Kind of go on with life. I'm working on that. You can go to college. Working on it. Yeah, working on trying to figure out how to get my GED. 22 years. What's taking so long to get your GED? Just not having the money to do it. How much does it cost to get a GED? $1,000. Why don't you have $1,000? You live with her. You have a fiance, too. I pay bills, too. What bills are you paying? I pay the electric. I pay the Wi-Fi. How are you making her do that? Why? Because that's- - Because I can't afford the bills by myself. - Okay, so what about fiance? You said fiancé's there. He helps. We both pay them. I'm confused how you can't save a thousand over the course of two years. A lot of that is spent on food and his games. Okay, so shut up. Dumb stuff. That's not I have to pay for bills. Right. Come on. Let's be completely honest here. What does fiancé do? He works for her store. He works for me. He works for you? Mm-hmm. For you? Are you the boss? I am the store manager. He is one of my employees. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. That's right. Okay. Does he make okay money? I mean, he makes about the same I do. How are you guys doing? I try to save. I've got like three and a half. No, how are you guys doing in life? You and your fiancé, you guys live together. You're engaged. How long have you guys been together? We've been together almost three years. Okay. Cool. Are you getting married? Yeah. It's the plan when we have the money to get the certificate, and then we won't do like a big wedding. It's like a hundred bucks or something, isn't it? Right. We won't do a big wedding until we have. You do think. Okay. You can just do it. Okay. Oh, you're pregnant. Yeah. She doesn't want a shotgun wedding. Well, I feel like you could just like tell me those things. Oh. But yeah. What was funny? What was the joke? What did I miss? I thought I told you I was pregnant. That was the joke? Oh, okay. You don't look very pregnant. How pregnant are you? Three months. Three months and four months. Great. So you can't take care of yourself. Can't even. Okay. It doesn't matter. It's like, it's so close. Listen, you can't even afford to get a hundred dollar certificate. How the f*** can you bring in a kid in this world? This pull out game isn't very strong, huh? That is. That is. That's. Wowch. Quite unnecessary. That's wild to say to dad to even visualize your daughter's. Oh my God. He was the one who was going that way. I know, but. Her emo pussy just getting absolutely blasted by his Iowa cock. Chocoma. He's actually Floridian. Uncut Floridian cock. Sliding deep inside and blasting. I don't know. Like we talk about a lot, but we're good. Chill the f*** out on that. You were the one that said it, dude. I don't, I don't know. I was just kind of going, why were you having sex? Yeah, I did. Sometimes my mouth or overrun my brain. I was on birth control, but unfortunately I was on the birth control for PCOS and it did never helped. What kind of birth control? It was on Opal. So the pill? Yeah. Yeah. Don't trust the f*** pill. No, I didn't. I got off of it because it made me cramp so bad that it, like I was debilitated. You got off of it and then took his Rolos? I got off of it and pulled out and then it just kind of happened. We said if it happens, it happens. Oh, great. When you couldn't even afford a $100 certificate, can't even afford a $1,000 GED, you live with your mom and you said, if it happens, it happens. What are we talking about? That's f***ed. That makes no sense. That is so selfish of you. Now there's a kid that didn't consent to come to this world that is coming into a clearly f***ed situation. Yeah. Mom was disappointed. Yeah? By a lot. By a lot. Okay. So what happened? You were shaking your head no. I want to know what happened here. What's going on? I just kind of felt that there was stuff that was going on behind her back that I was kind of like the little birdie in her ear, letting her know what was going on. You're going to have to f***ing tell me. Here's the thing. You blew up your family. I understand that. Now, you can't afford shit. She can't afford shit. He can't afford shit. He's eating burgers and I don't know who even knows what else in his barn. So what the f*** was going on? What was going on for you to absolutely blow up this family? I had had a feeling since I had gotten back like to live with them about two, three weeks where I felt something's not right. He's, he's showering at a different, this man lives and dies by his schedule. He showers at the same time every day. He does everything at the same time. He feeds the animals at the same time and it just started getting messed up. Be like, oh, maybe I'm showering at three or I'm showering at four. So I was kind of like, well, what's going on here? And I just had this inkling that he was cheating. So I kind of was like, hey, Angel, this is kind of going on. I'm not sure what's, what's going on. I don't know if we can get to the bottom of this. And we, um, I just kind of left it at that. Like you can take it or leave it. Um, and then the rest of it was her. Hold on. To be clear. And listen, maybe this goes somewhere where, where we learned something. Where we learned something bad did happen. But at this point you literally just had a feeling and you go to your mom like I have a feeling. Like that's a pretty intense thing to say about someone who's been with someone for a while, but just a feeling without proof, without evidence. Right. I also had a feeling. She had a feeling. Why do you have a feeling? For about six months beforehand, his behavior had started changing. Um, he was more secretive. He would hang out in the garage more. He would not talk to me. Um, he would leave a lot. So I had an inkling that he also was cheating. So with her suspicions confirming it, because I'm not home all the time, to me that confirmed it. I had to go searching. What do you have to say about all this? I never did. Never would. I couldn't. Couldn't? No. What do you mean couldn't? Every man can stick it in. I, well, Angel knows the story. Yeah. About what, what was transpiring, but Rose doesn't. So she knew the story about what was- She does now. She knows now. She did not know. When did you come clean? When we started setting and having honest, heart-to-heart talks about stuff. After the separation. Yeah. So daughter comes in, tries to say she has a feeling. Mother has a feeling too. And then you come clean after she leaves. After she leaves you, but you're denying anything ever happened. Correct. I mean, six dating accounts later, what else are you supposed to suspect? What do you mean? She had reached out and used a lawyer to find him on like dating apps, like Grindr, Tinder. Grindr? So we were like, oh, okay. And then he was like, no, there's six of them. Really peeling back that corn and sucking on those knobs. Huh? No. That's so straight. A Grindr manager. A Grindr man. We love it. We embrace it. No, I don't think so. Uh-uh. What do you mean then? He's straight up saying no. He's saying no, but he was using a alias, quote unquote, to go on these accounts. I mean- Well, how do you know? What's the proof? The proof is that she got a lawyer. She got a lawyer. What does a lawyer- This episode is brought to you by Google Chrome. You think you know a browser, but Gemini and Chrome, that's new. It can help you with progress. Find out more at gemini.com/chrome. This episode is brought to you by Google Chrome. and find outside partners, we would let the other person know. There was communication there, and it was never of the opposite sex. So he could fuck a man. He could go wherever he wanted with a boy. I could go wherever I wanted with a girl, but we could not go with. First of all, that's crazy. But second of all, okay, so daddy's gay. I knew that. Runs in the family. Yeah, we're all bi. Wait, so what was the issue then? He had permission. He did not. At the time, he did not. They had ended that. I knew they had ended that. Because of their last partner, they ended it. Yeah, but maybe your friend's recollection for time was off. I can't say for sure if it was. Okay, when was the last time y'all were open? 2018 probably was the last time that we actually had partners. And he said it was a year ago, so like 2025. And how old's your friend? He just turned 18 about a couple months ago. Okay, then it probably wasn't a couple months ago. Why was your friend on a dating app? At 17. He admitted to that. He was trolling men on there. Trolling? Come on, your friend's going to get someone in trouble. That is insane. So why'd you end it then? I'm confused. Was it that? No. Oh, then why did I just hear about all that? So what? That was what caused, that was like the final straw. There was a lot of stuff before that where when she, when I had gotten back in contact with her, because I had no contact until she was 18. Wait, why the were you taken away? The government took you away? So on the legal papers, it says that it is because of her marijuana use. Her, her, um, how did they word it? Her drug addiction. But in my opinion, it should have been because of the abuse in the household. Physical abuse. Oh, okay. Not from her. No? From Mike. But, um. I was kind of on bro's side for a little bit here so far. There's, um. I'm about to not be. I don't remember a lot of my childhood. I don't remember a lot of my childhood from it, so. Was it because of brain damage? Just blocked out. She was young. She was young. I mean, I was, I was taken at seven. My sister was five. Nothing. He right hooked my face when I was four and broke my nose. That is not nothing, man. No. No. It did happen. Why would I remember her crying in the bathroom that you were in? You just broke my nose. That was someone else that smacked her in the face. Who? Who? No. I hadn't cleaned my room. There were VHS tapes everywhere. And I remember protecting in the corner. 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We come back, and she had a red handprint across her face because he'd smacked her. You don't remember this? That's not at all. I can remember the apartment. I can visualize everything that happened. You told me you didn't remember anything from your childhood. This is something that very, very clearly stood out to me. And I remember to this day. And I don't remember a lot of my childhood. And you're denying this. Yes. I mean, there's stories that I have from my sister that she's just told me recently. What? That, like, just stuff that happened to her. What? Just, like, waking him up and him getting mad and just throwing stuff at the TV, breaking the remote, breaking things. Like, when she was younger. And she's quite a bit older than me, so. She's only ten years younger than me. Yeah, with her, I did get ticked off a couple of times, and she'd woke me up, and I broke a remote. Big deal. Sorry. This was. I was trying to avoid this. Only because of. It's uncomfortable to talk about because I also. There was a time that she hit me once, but she did apologize, and she felt very. Very bad. She tried to hit the bed with a belt when I wasn't going to sleep. Okay, who tries to hit a bed with a belt? And it accidentally hit my leg. It hit my thigh, and it left a bruise. I was in kindergarten, I believe. She was, like, five. Why were you hitting beds with belts? I was trying. They were not going to bed. I was trying to scare them. I missed and hit her instead. Interesting strategy. Well, I was not given any tools. I was not given any tools because I also was a foster kid. I also did not have parents. Okay, a belt's not a tool anyway. Well, no, but I didn't have the tools to be a good parent, and I know. Okay, don't reproduce that, you freak. You're right. So, bro completely denies it. And he can deny it all he wants, but it's a memory that's in my head. And it's a memory that I know for a fact my older sister remembers. Your older sister remembers him hitting you. She remembers hearing about it. Hearing. Not from me. Hearing about it from who? Um, I'm pretty sure. I'm not sure if they were still talking at the time, but his youngest from his first marriage was still around. Was. Did that person witness? Did not witness it. I don't remember. So then it's all hearsay. It is difficult. And anything that comes from the oldest one is because her brain has been poisoned by my mother, which is a completely toxic. It's a topic that I will not talk about. Okay. You don't have to talk about it, but can I ask why? What would be the incentive? Because she's narcissistic, egotistical, and a f***ing bitch. And she enjoys. Causing problems. Well. Do you agree. My brother got arrested and sent to prison for. F***ing b****es. Manufacturing and dealing. Yeah, we're not. We're not a great family. She blamed me for him getting arrested and doing that stuff because I didn't make him hang out with me and a buddy of mine. Yet, according to her, she always said that buddy of mine would end up getting me in trouble and arrested. Never did. And then she turns around and blames me for my brother getting arrested and thrown in prison because I didn't make him hang out with. With the person. With me and the person that she didn't want me hanging out with because I would get arrested. Do you agree with the assessment of his mother? His mother is a narcissist. Like. Okay, so. Textbook definition. So maybe his story checks out. This is difficult. But I've seen it. I've seen the abuse. Like, I physically have seen it. I saw this incident. What? I did. I ran to her. Why didn't you say that? I was asking if anyone saw it. Yeah, I said I ran to Angel. I ran to her. She's my mother. I want to comfort. - Oh, so you saw that? Yes, I saw this. So what's happened in the moment? Then how can you deny it if she saw it? I don't think it was a right hook. I thought it was a backhand, but same difference. Yeah, I try to be neutral. I've had people do false allegations on this show like four times now, so I try to be very skeptical of everything and everything that everyone says. But now that we have a witness. He mainly broke things, not people, but he did lay his hands on the kids. Consistently? Breaking things consistently. Why the f*** did you stay? Financially, I couldn't leave. What do you have to say? If you have a defense, like, listen, I've had people say false allegations on this show about other people. I'm willing to hear it. But the kids were taken away. Because there was founded child abuse. Yeah, I'm gathering that. The paperwork said because of the drug use and. My mental health. The. No, the papers literally said due to mom's ongoing substance abuse issues and due to her unresolved mental health issues. But I have a disorder that doesn't resolve. Right. What is it? Bipolar. Are you a trusted source in this story? Yeah, I would hope so. I take medicine. I've been taking medicine since I was 11. I don't know. I mean, I never got to see the legal papers because. They knew. My adoptive parents knew if I saw legal papers of what was going on that I would try to, like, backlash against it or I'd try to fight it. So you're saying S7, full hook, right here. S7? Four. What, four? That's why I thought it was a. Memories are very, very touchy of four. That's why I said I thought it was a backhand. Shit. That's why I'm, like, I'm surprised I've remembered it for this long. But that's the thing. I remember things from four, but my memories are half times better. It's make-believe. But, you know, when you dream things, you can remember dreams and that becomes reality. And that's, like, the brain's really weird. I'm not dismissing. And if she backs it up, I'm more on your side. I just have to be hypercritical of everything, especially if we blew up our entire lives for this thing. Now, I got one question I'll pose to you on this. You say it was a right hook. It was four. Look at that. What would a right hook do to a four-year-old? Break a nose? What else would it break? Eye sockets. It could break a lot more. Eye sockets, jaw, cheek, teeth. What I'm going to do is grab a pen, stab you in the neck, punch you in the lungs. That's the defense? Is that it would have harmed her more? That's not a defense. That's just showing that if you take a look at this. Are you saying nothing happened? Not even a slap? She did get slapped a few times. Ah. Okay. Well, now you're going to lose me. Why are we slapping kids in the face? Didn't slap in the face. Slap her on the ass. I'm sure lots of twinks did, too. But you'd never hit a kid with a fist. Never. Angel? Thoughts on this? I'm not. I've argued this with him before. What have you argued? I've argued back and forth about the fact that there was abuse. And he doesn't believe that there ever was. And I know there was. How do you know there was? Because I saw it. You saw a child get hit in the face? Yes. And I went and protected the child. She took us away. We would go and stay somewhere else. I'm on your side. I mean, this is. I'm on your side. Two, like, I believe two people that saw it versus one. Why would you deny it? I'm confused. Because, like, she's 20 now, right? Like, what we can do. Listen, life's complicated. I do not excuse abuse in any way whatsoever, obviously. But with the distance of time and, you know, working on issues and someone coming back in life, owning up to it and apologizing for it could create a better future for the family. Right? Yeah. But you're not willing to. He never did. Well, he's denying it now. I said there was times where she did get slapped. You said never on the face. No. They're saying they saw it on the face. No. But if two people remember it, plus the other child, that it is hard to deny, where accepting responsibility and accountability and apologizing and saying you're working on yourself could repair that relationship. True. I wrote her a letter telling her. I wrote her a letter telling her that I know I wasn't a very good parent. He did. I backed up. That I made mistakes. Okay. He wrote me a note. That I asked her to, if she could find it eventually, to forgive me. I did. I sat, when you were in the kitchen when I first moved in, I told you, and even when you came down to Florida to see us, I told you, I don't hold it against you. That's passion. That's passion. That's passion. That's passion. The past is in the past. I can't change the past. But then when I moved back in, you just ignored, ignored me. I don't know if some of that was because of my fiance. I don't know if that was because you felt like you were losing me all over again. But a lot of it felt like I would try and I would be like, oh, here's what I'm interested in. I would try to talk to you, but you know, like five words when you talk to me. But you barely talk. I'll tell you, unless it's something you're interested in. You don't, you don't really talk. So like if it's something I'm interested in and I'm like, oh, or even when I tried to get a project car that I could learn cars and you could teach me, you had shot down the idea in order for something that I could drive to work. Even though I had said it could be drivable and need some work. And I would want to do that as a father-daughter activity. And you had shot that down. The thing had too many miles on it and was clear down in Missouri. That's not the point. The point was, is that you didn't try. That's what I was saying about it. No, but that's not the point. And the letter, did he admit to the abuse? Okay. It's difficult. I'm more leaning towards the all side on that. If there were multiple witnesses, because I don't do that. Oh, we told someone and that person says like, I'm not going to do that. But if you both saw it, that is different. And you're saying you saw multiple instances. Correct. Like what? Well, there was the spanking on the butt, which I agree with also. A lot of people spank on the butt. But I got spanked on the butt. Yeah. Right. But there were times where he would pick them up and hold them very high off the ground and then drop them. And he would. What? Yeah. And he would yell at them and he would backhand them a lot usually. And yeah, this is, it's all true. Whether you believe it or not, there's a lot of stuff I don't remember. Thoughts on this? I'd never pick them up high and drop them. I did at one point get angry very easily and quite, quite often. But what would result from that, that you'll take responsibility for? That I made people scared. I mean, it's not just scared. Why would they be scared? What were you doing? Because of the look I would get. The look, not an action? The fact that I would. Snap and yell. Now she has a f***ed up nose. Let me see. Can you see it? You saw on the bridge of the nose? Yeah, my dad broke my nose too, so I get it. Yeah. Well, not that I would f***ing know what's going on. She's saying it happened. You're saying it's her ex-fiance? Why would her ex-fiance f***ing come in and. I never said it was her ex-fiance. Mine. Her ex-fiance. She has an ex-fiance? No, no, no, no, no. Her ex-fiance. Her ex-fiance. Your wife. Ex-fiance. Because he was actually brought up on charges, but they never did file him. Oh, really? Remember? He wasn't brought up on charges. There was an unfounded child abuse case. And they decided not to found it because of. So he would be able to keep the line of work that he did. No, that wasn't why they found it. They had it unfounded. He was no longer in the situation and therefore was no longer a threat. This is difficult, guys. This is difficult. What made you pull the trigger, though, on leaving? Because you blew up this whole thing and it's led to a lot of consequences. The thing that made me leave was just years and years and years of being treated as less than. How so? I wasn't allowed to deal with the finances. I wasn't allowed to touch the checkbook. I had to provide all kinds of receipts. These are all things that, yes, you should do, but I wasn't taught how to handle the money. Okay, no one is. But I wasn't even allowed access to it. That's different. And I made them. money. So I wasn't allowed access to the money that I made. I have been the breadwinner off and on throughout our marriage. Why wouldn't you let her look? Have access? Were you controlling the wallet from her? Somewhat. Now, if you knew this was an issue and she has left on this issue, why wouldn't you open it up and try to run it as a couple? We've discussed that a little bit, but before. I mean, she left over it. We discussed it? What has we discussed it? Things that had been pointed out to me by a buddy of mine, and he explained some stuff. Huh? There's a friend of his that he's had for years and years and years, and his friend, when I left, his friend did not like me, has never really liked me because I've left twice. Oh, you've left twice. Why has she left? Why has she left you twice? So she might come back again. No. Why are you saying no? Because I don't want to. Why? Because I've dealt with this for 20 years. I don't want to deal with it. With what? Just him controlling the wallet? Him being controlling in general. What? Tell me. Controlling who I hang out with, controlling the purse, controlling the, you know, my, what I can buy, what I can't buy, what I can drive, what I can't drive. You know, anything that I wanted to do to make my life better or learn how to do better, he was always against it. Going to college, that was another one he was against. Why? So he just like traps you in? That was the kind of abuse that it was. Yeah. For me. For me. I consider that abuse. Abuse is a big word. I mean, I consider that mental abuse. It might be. It definitely might be depending on how the dynamic was. I never. Was against you going to college. Not once. Yes, you were. I didn't really like it. Why? Because she would be. It was an evening, if I remember right. So? And we lived in a different town. It was about 45 minutes to her college. So? What's the. I'm waiting for a reason. And she'd end up being home really late. So? And I'd have to be in bed because I'd have to get up early for work. Have her sleep in a different room. That's the arrangement we might go have. Like, I have to wake up. I got to do a pretty intense job. If she's out late with friends or whatever, you know, spare room. What's wrong with that? That was the reason? You know, she's. Do you want to get back with her? Yes. You know, she's claiming that you have abused her. Do you have a response to that? Because she's not going to get back with someone who has mentally abused her and controlled her. There was a point in time that I felt that she needed to kind of be taken care of. Well, taking care of and controlling is different, right? Because of her impulsiveness, because of her mental. Does that mean controlling? She needs to control what she can and cannot do because I'll take care of the household. I pay the bills. I don't tell my lady what she can do and can't do. Okay. Okay. Do you think he resents your daughter moving back in? Because it sounds like, yeah, it sounds like your entire perspective and worldview has changed when she came back. My entire worldview changed when she left. Then when she came back. Seven. Seven? Yeah. Okay. Well, that was a long time ago, so. It doesn't feel like a long time when you're a mom. Okay, but it was, and you stayed, so. But clearly you left once she came back. Because I had the strength to do it. Do you think she stole her from you? Do you think Rose stole Angel from you? In a way, I think so. I knew that. I knew he said that he felt like I was spending too much time with her. I mean, after 12 years and not having a parental figure, having one that was like your best friend was really refreshing, one that wasn't going to. One that wasn't going to judge you, one that wasn't going to scream at you, one that wasn't going to tell you how terrible you're doing in life and was just going to help you through life, felt like such a relief. And that part I think I understood, but it seemed like I was kind of jealous because of the relationship that Angel had with you, Rose. And I understand that. I was jealous that it was open to being that kind of relationship, and I didn't know how to form that kind of relationship because I was dealing with some of my own issues. And I was withdrawn into myself, and I was drinking quite a lot. Oh, so maybe you don't remember. Bam, bam, bam. No, the drinking started fairly recently. What do you mean was then? If it started recently and was, was it like four days? No. So it had been a little over two years ago. I used to, I'd sit down and have two or three after work. No big deal. Okay. But then. Turned into 15. So what are we trying to do? You want to get back with her. You're trying to start an independent life, and you got knocked up. Pretty much. And can't do anything with your life at all, including getting a GED. What the do I do? Here, what am I trying to do? And it's very difficult to know what's going on. I'm more on y'all's side in terms of believing what happened at this point. There's a lot of people, the further and further I dig, do a lot of false allegations, unfortunately, these days. It's actually kind of surprising. And the fact that people don't believe that that happens is crazy. When we've had like four instances on this very show alone. But I believe y'all in what you say. 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I don't know. Go out there. Start taking some dick, dude. You're starting over. Okay. The death glare. He's the top. I don't know. I guess. I don't know. Oh, that death glare is good. Maybe he's versed. He is not giving me an indication of which way. He won't. It's okay to be a buy king. We love it. You already got the piercing, dude. This is kind of known. No, that would be the other ear. I feel like I see a little nipple piercing, too. Don't I? Yeah. Okay. I mean. No, I love it. Buy king. We support it. And like, she's clearly, I mean, she's clearly in box and she's like a box addict. I mean, just look at them. So it's like, again, runs in the family like they said. So I love it. I want you to get out there and do that. Listen. I just. I don't know if they'll be able to move beyond things, especially without you taking accountability and apologizing. I don't know if they can. And I don't know if you're capable of taking that responsibility. So I don't think they're going to come back. It's kind of on you, buddy. I don't know. Neanderthal mode. How frequently does that happen? You. It's rare anymore, but it happens a lot. And why are you leaving today? If things are getting better. They're really not. I wasn't happy for a very, very long time. I left this relationship four years ago. Oh, did he know that? No. Really? Really. How did he not know? What do you mean you left? What was you leaving? Me emotionally left the relationship. How did he not know? He might have had his suspicions. What'd you do that was different? I didn't spend the time with him. I didn't go and do the extra things that I would normally do as a wife. Was this not a red flag? No. Cause I, assume that she was because I knew she was busy with work and stuff. I'd asked her about it a couple of times, and it was like she was just busy and stressed and stuff with work, and I could kind of see that. So she said everything, kept telling me everything was fine. Okay. So you guys only have two kids? Together. He has two from a previous marriage. Yeah. Oh, you have more kids. Yeah. Okay, well, maybe they'll tell a different story then. I'm seeing head movement from this side. I've talked to her, the oldest. How old are those kids? Oldest is 32, and then I'm not sure about the youngest because we don't talk to her. Why? She's kind of one of those. She's a f***head. Yeah. She f***ed down the wrong path. My goodness, you guys are f***ing crazy. She's 29. How much f*** have you done? Zero. I hope so. Okay. Well, did the kids talk to you? My oldest one doesn't. The one that's not a f***ing kid. My youngest one. Talks to you for money. Well, yeah. Yep. Now, if you were different in the. That would give me a little more hope, but I'm sorry, if the other kids don't talk to you, why don't they talk to them? My oldest sister doesn't talk to him because she has also very traumatic experiences from her childhood that just kind of made her. What? The one that she specifically remembers the most is when he thought it would be funny to dress up as a clown and enter her room with a knife, and he dropped said knife on her arm. She now has a scar on her arm. Good death, man. That is not what happened whatsoever. What happened? There was a clown doll that we was going to use at my buddy's Halloween party, and I was going to attach a knife to its hand, and I was going, I probably shouldn't have because I knew she was terrified of clowns, but I went into her room and was showing it to her, and I kind of was holding it up, and she lunged at it to shove it away from her, and when she did, she hit the knife with her arm. How is the memory so different? Probably because of, once again, my mother. Your mother convinced her that you dressed up as a clown? My mother would convince you that your name is not Caleb. Well, it's so weird, because you support her in the accusations, but you support him in the mother defense. No, the thing is, it's not a defense at all. No, the mother reality. But you are supporting her in the accusation reality. You're supporting him in the mother reality. So what the f*** do I believe? The mother, for the oldest kids, mine included, she won in custody of them. When we moved from the town we used to live in to Des Moines, my mother whined and cried and bitched and moaned. She's alive? Unfortunately. Yeah. That we were taking her rose away from her. That she would never see her rose again. Even though f*** was also around. But Gemini and Chrome, that's new. It can help you with practically anything on the web. Like restoring a vintage motorcycle from a 50-page restoration blog. Or finally break down that long article you've had open for weeks. Gemini and Chrome is here for it. Ready to make anything online make sense? There's no place like Chrome. Check responses, setup required, compatibility and availability varies 18 plus. Yeah. And she never did. She always picked favorites. My oldest daughter was her favorite. So what do you believe? From my first marriage. Do you believe evil mother or dressed as clown? I tend to believe my sister in things because you tend to remember traumatic experiences. My sister got gaslit by your grandmother. Oh, and that's something she was really good at. I mean, I literally don't even know her. Ask Angel. On gaslighting? Yes. Well, no, no, no. She backs it up. Angel backs it up. There you go. With that story, though, I will interject and tell you the actual truth. So what the oldest remembers and what he remembers are very similar, except that when she went to lunge, the knife did drop and cut her arm open. And dressing as a clown. He said he just had a clown doll. No, it was a clown doll. Oh, then I don't bully you. See, there you go. In either way, it shouldn't, I mean, again, you said it shouldn't have happened. It shouldn't have happened. Right. I should have, I shouldn't have done it. I was stupid. But he didn't hold a knife over a kid. The kid lunged to the knife. Right. Right. Like, that is different. That is different, and I do agree. Okay, so that's not a traumatic. I don't. So now maybe you ought to ask the other daughter as to why she told you I was dressed as a clown, which you said she told you. I mean, I was 15 at the time, so that's kind of a weird thing. And. Is it not a red flag that none of your daughters talk to you, though? Like I said, my youngest daughter will from time to time. For money. Right. So I just kind of let that go. And the non ones, my oldest daughter. She's been corrupted and twisted by the mother, which, OK, the witch of the West and the very youngest, it's still no contact until adoptive family allows. Right. Good. I don't know, guys. OK. I know it's very hard to pick. But who's side to be on? Yeah. And this is an absolute mess. And the reality is, like, I don't know. Don't. I do see a connection of kind of redoing what was done to you for what it's worth. A little bit of a connection. He kind of held you back. I think you're kind of holding her back. A little bit. A lot of bit. She should be getting a GD right now and going out with her fiance and taking, you know. More Rallo's and making more kids. And having what she wants to do. But you're kind of keeping her there. Having her pay the bills. And I know you need help with the bills. But she needs to pay $1,000 for a GED. I'm kind of seeing a repeat process here. Do you see that? That isn't good. Why are you doing it? Leave. Grow up. I just, I very much miss my mother. I didn't have one for three years. You can live nearby and get dinner and have a big, nice relationship that isn't codependent on life. Right. A lot of the reason that she, that we live with her. With her is because, I mean, to get her out was kind of the, the plan was we were going to hold. That's handily. But the thing is, it's draining all of your money, which is preventing you from even getting something as simple as a GED. Not very difficult. All right. What do you think your financial score is? Zero to tens? Zero being the worst, ten being the best. Three. Now, if I call that daughter and I'm being told she's hammer elite, what would she say? Can I call her? Yeah. I have her number. I'm sure she would absolutely freak out. But. Okay. Yeah, yeah. Let me put her face to a name. Okay. Hello? Oh, you're going to have to move to somewhere better. Where are you? I'm at work. Can you go to a quiet place? Yeah, I'll be in a second. She works in manufacturing, too. Oh, yeah. Hello? Hello, can you hear me? Yes. I am calling your father. Mike, I'm trying to verify some things. This is very confusing. Yeah. What? What happened? Um, multiple times he beats the crap out of me. Not only me, but my younger sister and my mother. How? And your mother? Why did you? Oh, not me. Oh, the first life. He broke plates and threw them at my mother. He almost killed my mom one night. How? Did he? Did he almost kill? How? He was beating the crap out of her and I threatened to call the cops and he took the phone and he threw the phone against the wall. Yeah, I don't think so. Right before my 16th birthday, he dropped a knife on my arm and I've got an inch long scar from a kitchen knife on my arm. Okay, but we kind of got the other story of that and it makes a little more sense. You, it sounds like you lunged towards the knife. No. So, he came in my room and he thought he was being funny and I was like, no. Get away from me. He flat out dropped it on me. Okay. What else happened? There was one time he ended up dragging me by my hair and kicking me in the side and then my grandpa got in his face and said, if you have to lay a hand on her again, it'll be the last thing you do. That's crazy. Did that happen? No. He's saying none of this happened. Yeah. He's also a habitual liar. Ask him how many kids he has. How many kids do you have? Four. How many kids does he have? I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. Okay. He has at least five. At least five. We didn't even know that. What the full shit. How is there a disagreement on that? Like how- We don't know about the other one. How are you saying there's another? He raped a mentally handicapped woman and got her pregnant and there's another child. What? Don't look at me. I don't know nothing about this. Proof. Proof. Proof. Proof. Evidence of any kind, please. I can comment. my family well but who's your family my aunt knows who it is well that's not necessarily proof what do you mean how do you how do you know what do you mean mentally handicapped what is she a bed bound i'm not sure my aunt just said that it was i don't know how old he was but it was a mentally handicapped woman and he got her pregnant and it was some girl that i ended up going to school with are you denying this it was a yes he's denying this um is he also denying stalking me stalking you oh he showed up to my church right after his my stepmom left in and won't leave i'm not stalking her show up you can give your i didn't even know that she was going there stale i have text message proof from his aunt stating from one of the ladies in the church that I go to from his aunt asking for pictures of me to show him. Huh? I don't know anything about that. Okay. So he dragged you by your hair and kicked you. Yep. Down the driveway. My grandpa showed up. You're saying your dad lies? He's not my dad. He's my stepdad, and no, he wouldn't lie, but my fucking cunt of a mother will twist and manipulate people's minds to get her damn way. Do you agree with that? Oh, I do. Oh, so for me having all the trauma and abuse issues that I do because of you are just made up? When? My mother pulls the kind of crap that she does. She will convince you that shit's happened. Oh, yeah, because I had bruises on my arms and my legs and my sides for weeks, and I had chunks of my hair missing. We can call my grandpa and ask my grandpa because my grandpa was there. My grandpa saw you sit there driving down the driveway kicking me in the side. I did. I don't know why you keep looking at me. On my dead child, that's what she did. What? Okay. Do you believe that he right-hooked who we are calling Rose, your sister here? Do I what? Believe that he right-hooked your sister. I'm going to say her name and bleep it. Oh, yeah, I believe it. Oh, okay. Okay. Anything else I should ask? I don't even know what this is. This is such a. I honestly don't know. Oh, sounds like she's going back to the factory anyway. Okay, thank you. You're right. The disabled woman? No. Yeah, I don't know nothing about that. I really don't either. It's just a story that was told. I have no idea what the hell she's talking about. Okay. What you doing there? Taking an anxiety pill. Okay. It doesn't prevent you hitting fibroids? It keeps me calm. It helps when my anxiety starts peaking. This anxiety, why are you the disabled woman? I'm being accused of it. It never happened. Okay. You're being accused of a lot that have never happened. Yeah. It's a little convenient that none of it has ever happened, ever, in the history of your life. I'm very open to counter-arguments and counter-evidence. And I know it's impossible to prove a negative. I understand that. I mean, it's happened to lots of influencers. You can't prove a negative. But you're getting a lot from the family. It's not a disgruntled ex that is trying to get something from you. It's not someone that's trying to get attention on the Internet. It's not. These are family members. Daughters. Like I said, my oldest daughter, will basically, for lack of a better term, be brainwashed by my mother. And believing, basically, anything. I don't know his mother, so I honestly have no say in that. Do you agree that his oldest daughter is getting brainwashed? No, I don't believe all of it. Okay. I guess these are your finances. Let's see you getting independent. Again, you can get your hammer financial score, which she said she was like, what did you say, 0-1? Three. Three. It's very rare that we have to have security on standby. They have security right outside the door. I'm a little curious. I don't know if I'm concerned for me, but I'm concerned for maybe them. Are you afraid at home? Really? When was the last time he put his hands on you? Never. That's not. Are you afraid? Because when he gets angry, he will. The last time we got in an argument, he stepped up to me and I stepped up to him because I was done with it. And instead of. He pulled his fist back like he was going to hit me, but then he ran over to the fence and punched the fence instead, which I'm very happy that he didn't hit me. But that's still very scary for me. Do you agree that that happened? I hit the fence. I never pulled my fist back at her. I would have. She told me to get out of there and not come back. I walked over. I was headed to the gate. Gate on the fence. I was walking over there and I punched the fence. Punching holes in walls and punching fences is no different from physical abuse. It causes mental abuse. It's abuse. Yeah, I think abuse is abuse. Well. It's straight up. Well, hold on. No, it is objectively different than hitting someone in the face. Well, it is different, but it's still abuse. Let's not go woke Twitter TikTok. Like, I'm sorry. There's degrees of murder. There's degrees of sexual assault. You can't say there's no difference. I'm not saying it's good. You're not going to get hurt. You're not going to get me coming into fence. But punching a wall versus punching a face? Let's not say there's no difference. It causes the same amount of trauma. No! The same amount of trauma as literally getting a nose busted versus hitting a wall? Come on. Now you're going woke TikTok shit. You're going to lose me real quick if we're saying there's no difference. Your generation has lost that there's degrees and shit. I'm sorry. Hey, would it be a little different him hitting that wall versus turning to you and punching you in the face? Yes. Shut the fuck up. You're going actual. You're going fuck brain. Come on. What is that? You write a tweet once. I'm glad. Come on. Stop. It might trigger some of the same synapses or something. Might have some memory, but you can't say it's no different. I mean, I don't mean that definitively. Like, it's no different. Well, you said it. Words matter. Has law enforcement ever at least been like, why has no one called law enforcement? No. Yeah. Law enforcement's been involved. Oh, okay. What happened? Did they do anything? That's how DHS got involved. Has he ever been arrested? Not in any of our arguments. With my first wife, yes. Oh, good death. Why were you arrested? She slapped me. I hauled off out of instinct and hit her back. I fully admit to that. I was wrong in that. I should have handled it completely differently, and I did not. But if you was to ever talk to her and ask her, she would tell you that it happened one time and that it never happened after that and that I would never do that. Okay. Get a cheap one-bedroom. Let her the f--- go. Come on. I have a hard time with that, and I'm not going to lie. Hard time with what? I lost her when she was seven. I just got her back. I'm not saying move back to Florida. No, no, no, you're right. Move down the street, get dinners. Have a healthy relationship. Don't be codependent. Fair. What are we doing? You act like there's no middle ground, no happy medium. Buddy, I don't think she's coming back to you. And I'll be candid that I think I agree with them about most of the stuff that happened. Hard to say for sure. I don't know if you're f---ing immobile, like, I don't know. Like, and I hope you don't. I hope you don't do that. Not a good place to stick it. Let them consent. Consent's good. We like consent. Don't we? Big consent fans? Big consent fans. Now, of course, to her generation, you can withdraw consent five years later. But besides that, mentally disabled people, they can't really, like, I think I'm losing them. I don't think she's coming back. What are you going to do? I'm going to go through her finances to help her on her journey, but what does bro want to do here? I would like to work things out. Is that an option? We were working on it, and then I, no. I think she's gone. What would you, as their daughter, have them do? I would really like her away from him. Um, that's-- How's your relationship? You think you know a browser, but Gemini and Chrome? That's new. with practically anything on the web like restoring a vintage motorcycle from a 50-page restoration block, or finally break down that long article you've had open for weeks. Check responses set up required compatibility and availability varies 18 plus. Relationship with him. I gave it a good shot for a year. I tried. And I just. He wrote a letter. He did write a letter. Why'd you give up? And I gave up because nothing changed. Even on this entire trip, what do you mean? What's not changed? What happened on this trip? It's the blatant disregard for anything that's happening outside of himself. What do you mean? What happened this trip? Like flights. I had ended up being booked on a separate flight. I've never flown before and I've got severe vertigo. So I was like, I'm supposed to be on going to a whole separate airport, figuring everything out on my own. I didn't know what I was doing. You're losing me. There's chat TPT. I don't know what to tell you. And then we, we had figured it out, but just through the entire thing, it was just the, I guess I'll pay the difference. I guess, I guess. Just kind of very, I don't want to. Very, I don't want to. If it's not going my way, then I don't want it. That's our example? No. No? Why don't you go try it? Because she failed. He really does have a blatant disregard for everybody else. But like, for instance, when I, let's just do finances really quick, because I swear that's the biggest thing. When I would ask to get something for the house, it would always be, we have to wait. But if he needed something, it would be, let's get it right now. Right. Okay. And that, that is pretty common. What if he agreed to therapy? Yeah. As far as I know, he's in therapy. Yeah. You're in therapy? Yes. Is it for anger? Oh, we're going over a lot of stuff. What if they did couples therapy? I'm not advocating to get back together. That's obviously what he's advocating for. I'm trying to see what there is here. I'm, I'm sure that they've tried it before. And I, as far as I knew, that never really worked out. Okay. So you're done, done, done, done, done. Not, not a 1% chance. It's like, it's done, done, done, done, done. In my head, it was done. Yeah. Oh, already was. That's true. Okay. Okay. So I think that's it. Unfortunately, it is a, two way street. And unlike the disabled person, she can kind of leave. So I don't know if you did that. I'm just going to poke in at you for that one. But disabled deserve love to them. All right. By the way, he didn't, he didn't know this. He didn't know that I was done. I know. I picked that. I make jokes over here with her. Yeah, I know. I got it. Okay. Um, you're going to get canceled for that. This is going to be an awkward trip home. Yeah. Okay. So first class. It's okay. First class. What'd you do? What have you done here? First class is my, um, is my personal bank. I have a savings account. Uh, I think more than anything, you have a debt with them that you're past due on. Why can't you at least pay a minimum monthly payment? Because I'm paying a minimum monthly payment on everything and it's over my income, but home. Okay. Let's see. I only have your statement. So let's, let's play a fun little game here. It's the game I like to play where you spent, uh, four times as much money going out to eat than you spent on groceries. Yep. That was for a woman. I, I take responsibility for some of that. Get the f*** away. Spend your own money. You dumb b****. I went, yeehaw. I got a brand new credit card. Let me spend money on it. I know. Oh, what the f***? What are you doing? First of all, no, this is your most recent money. You didn't spend on here. So that might have been what got you there. Yeah. That's what got me into $12,000 in debt and on that one. Yeah. So you are not paying your minimums. I don't understand. It looks like your minimums are normally like 150. No, like 120. But you're behind, maybe a hundred. But you're just not paying them. You're a few months behind. You racked up the credit card immediately and then not spent. And then you spent hundreds on, oh geez, no, even more. Yeah. I've spent a lot of frivolous money. Uh, yeah. It was $774 going out to eat. Wah, I can't pay my minimums? Wah? Really? We're going to be a victim here? No. You were? You're saying I can't pay my minimums. My minimums are above my bills. Go f*** yourself. Your minimums are above your bills. You're spending $700. You're spending $774 going out to eat. You can be in a victim in a story that I can't verify. I'll be on your side with that. That is how the world works. I can verify this one. This one's bullshit. This one's your fault. Yes. So what the f*** are you going to sit here and tell me your minimums are above your bills, your income? Go f*** yourself. You spent a third of your income going out to eat, fourth of your income. So yee-haw. It was not. It was very stupid. Oh, sit there and pout. That's your choices. No, I'm not. Oh, I know. I know it was my choices that got me here, but here's the thing. When you are not given the ability to grow up, not given the chance, you do really stupid shit. Oh, you're, oh, f*** you. Oh, shut up. 20 years. What? What? 20 years. Oh, what? You're, what are you? You're 42. Uh-huh. And I got married when I was 21. I got with him when I was 20. Oh, so? Nobody taught me all this shit. What the f***? My parents got together in 1819. What do you think everyone's done in the history of our, oh, now it explains the f***ing hair dye? Shit, now I don't even believe any of the shit you guys said about him. You're losing me. Dude, you're a f***. What do you mean? No one learns any of this. You read, you Google, you learn. We're in the age of f***ing knowledge. You can learn anything like that. What do you mean? What the f***? What did you say? Who didn't teach you? Nobody taught me. No one taught me. And you got yourself in debt, didn't you? Yes, and I'm not complaining about it at 42. I'm not complaining. What? You're taking the victim card right now that nobody taught me. You did this like two months, you did this last month. Yep. Last month, 42. I'm sorry, you getting married at 20 doesn't mean you blow $774 going out to eat and claim victim at 42. What the f*** are you talking about? That's one of the reasons that she used to, she wanted me to take care of the finances because she knew she was bad with money. And I, I filed. Oh, don't start crying. What is this? I'm mad at him. You got mad at him for what? Nothing. Just don't worry about it, okay? I'm mad at him. I'm worried about it. You're on my show. You're crying. I'm not crying. I'm not crying. Your lips are quivering and you have tears in your eyes. I'm allowed to have tears in my eyes. I didn't say you're not allowed to. I'm asking, what are you mad at him for? Just nevermind. It's just me. It's me getting, it's me getting into my feelings. About what? Everything. What happened? When he goes, this is, this is why I did this. This is why I did this. Cause there's always a f***ing excuse. Yeah, maybe, maybe. It kind of f***ed me for a second. And I don't know, you may have lost me. I know I've said that a couple of times in this episode about losing me, lost me, all that good stuff. But the thing is, no one ever taught me. You're 42. You've had access to the internet. You've had access to the library. You've had access to books. You've had access to people you can talk to. Uh, you getting married at 20 is nothing. People have done that since forever. And there are many women out there like me who have no idea what's going on with their finances. Why didn't you use the platform called Google? I'm confused on why you're asking me about Google. Because you can learn personal finances to spend less than you make. Your entire argument is you got married at 20. That's why you can't figure out how to do this. I understand he was controlling. He was a bad person. We all got that. I'm on your side for that. You spending $774 last month is not excused by that. No, of course not. But you were excusing it by that. I was excusing it over stupidity, and no, I shouldn't have done that. But. Then why were you trying to say you never learned anything? Excuses. Uh-huh. There you go. Very good. You owe $11,998.38. That's what makes financial audit beautiful, ladies and gentlemen, is the fact that someone can be a little. I'm a legitimate victim, but I'm still not going to let them get off on bullshitting me. No one can bullshit here. That is reality. No matter how much. Like, I'm on your side in this conversation. I legitimately am, but I'm not going to allow me to be swayed because I'm on someone else's side when they start to bullshit me. Okay. $100 normal minimum repayment. You're behind a few months. 17 years to pay off. Yeah. Okay. Happen Bank. I have a payoff amount of $2,100. $236. What is this? It was a Christmas loan. For what? Christmas gifts. Why? Why are we borrowing for Christmas? You don't do Christmas if you can't afford Christmas. You grew up in the era of getting an apple if you couldn't afford shit? No, I didn't. Bro did. Yeah. Well, I grew up in upper middle class, so I'm used to a different Christmas. Wait. Hold on. Now the victim shit is really falling apart. You grew up in upper middle class? Well, lower middle. Okay. Let's put it this way. Solid middle class for the 90s. you all are broken yeah you're a permanent victim your tiktok brain and dude you're just horrible you guys all should go to therapy that are not enablement therapists because looking at the color of your hair you go to enablement therapy don't even go to therapy oh let's let's start and not an enablement therapist you need a real thing you need money to do that oh shut the f**k up you can get a therapist like 50 bucks a couple times a month okay you can do some online shit there's so many options now just because you refuse to use google doesn't mean it doesn't exist what's your minimum payment on this uh 80 83 dollars okay sick christmas debt that's good did you get some good gifts good capital one oh you're spending on it yeah well that's not a very smart thing to do if we want to pay off our debt nope okay you owe three thousand seven hundred thirty seven dollars and fifty nine cents with the ninety three dollar minimum payment you spent eight hundred fifty seven dollars and two cents well credit is accruing interest is accruing you've maxed it out i have a note that was just typed to me and it says he's a homosexual this episode is brought to you by google chrome you think you know a browser but gemini and chrome that's new it can help you with practically anything on the web like restoring a vintage motorcycle from a 50 page restoration blog or finally break down that long article you've had open for weeks gemini and chrome is here for it ready to make anything online make sense there's no place like chrome check responses set up required compatibility and availability varies 18 plus thank you that's great sick that's wonderful got him over here you guys don't know this but i usually get like and there's like something they're leaving out they'll tell me like no he's lying like this is what it is and the note this time is he's a homosexual okay love it gay braid it up there's a whole twink street downtown it's called fourth street again i don't know that because of that reason it's just like they all go there in their chaps i assume and you're just like if i was sticking in is that a bottom or a top that's that's a top dad's a top don't know you said stick it in that's a top door dashing buffalo wild wings that's stupid oh yeah yeah that's stupid well done cash app door dashing taco bell bullshit bullshit any bullshit adventureland park adventureland park adventureland park it's almost like you're going on dates or something you're dating people yep oh shit oh we'll talk about that more in the post show the impressive we can't even keep him around for the post show bros shutting down that medicine is kicking in okay um oh this is nice i'm glad we completely just immediately maxed out our city simplicity card yeah yep five thousand nine hundred seventy two dollars and eighty four cents with a minimum payment of sixty dollars yep garbage but the thing is when you go out there and you hit fourth street tonight they are pre-douched they are pre-douched twinks oh he's starting to imagine it you see it on his face now he's getting excited oh wait it was all spinning i thought this was gonna be like a transfer or something it's bullshit bullshit bullshit bullshit bullshit bullshit bullshit bullshit bullshit bullshit sally beauty bullshit bullshit subway country bar dance hall women or men both you're going on just dates you're just out there yo listen if you're single well i want you to go out there and have a good time uh that wasn't for me that was actually for a roommate of mine the roommate ran us into some debt what yep but but he's paying it off very quickly this is crazy dude spending thousands of dollars on just absolute bullshit a firm just paid that off i mean it's 25 a month what did you affirm for 273 dollars uh those were for bunky boards for some a bedroom set that i bought that i also put on a firm what is wrong with you oh my gosh another critic okay you know this is what you deserve this that's actually a personal line of credit okay yeah these are all your choices it's all for bullshit and i no longer have sympathy that wow i can't afford life you're just spending all your money that you don't have right like so shut the fuck up stop holding her back stop being a victim you're being stupid 3318.85 minimum monthly payment 207.77 here's another credit card this is all just you being a moron though 1160.83 60 minimum payment that's all for vet stuff for my care credit you should have pet insurance you shouldn't have a pet if you can't afford that because you can't afford to take care of them if something happens now we have a lot to review in the post show that i'm so excited to get in but we have to go we have to finish this financial audit 6,313 dollars to 65 cents on this car loan with a minimum monthly payment being 200 and something yep 219 54 because the thing is that we have to is. Oh, he also just took out a SoFi loan as well. That's great. I'm sure we'll get into that. $2,225 is what this car is worth. Just trying to get your debts on the phone. Yo, you have student loans for the college he wouldn't let you do? What are you. Okay, so. Hold on. Those student loans are actually deferred, and they're deferred because the college that I went through got found for having. Yeah, but I thought he didn't let you go to. Oh, no. He disagreed with it the whole time. That's why I didn't complete it. No. So you weren't forced. You were making it sound like he was forcing you not to go to college. He did. That's why I didn't complete. What? But you went. But I. How long did you go? I was literally one term away when he told me not to go. So how long did you go? A year and a half. But you said he. I did it behind his back for a good short chunk of it. Oh, okay. Well, that would be different. Is that true? Yeah, I'm struggling here, guys. I feel like I'm just surrounded by a bunch of liars and over-sensationalizers, so I don't even know. I don't even f***ing know, man. It is so hard to believe people these days. Shit. I don't know what's going on. Yeah, student loan's $11,972. I mean, it'd be great if you can complete it. You don't have a bad job, though. So this is the house. Who has the house? Us. Me and him. Who lives there? He does. $109,686.07. Refinanced without her name on it. I'm not going to save much on the rate, anyway. Minimum. Radio, $109,686. Is that a 7.5% interest rate? You owe $1,132 a month. 92 cents. Is he paying for that? Yes. That's good. Okay, checking account. $25 in it. That's not great. Bullshit. That's my savings account. Oh, well, that's also not great. Okay, well. Yeah, so I mean, it's just transferring things back and forth. You're stopping in and getting bullshit left and right. It's the same thing that we saw on the credit cards. It just isn't that. Yep. Okay, but budgeting you so that you can be. I'm going to be independent of your daughter is what I care about, so that's what I'm interested in right now. Same. Well, after the budget, we're going to figure out about an affair that she's been having and all these different things that you didn't even know. Yeah, it's about to get f***ing crazy. I'm sorry. We're going to ruin a lot of people's lives here in the post show. It'll be fun. So total income for you is $3,299.14. Debt minimum through payments, not the mortgage, because we're not going to include that because bro is paying. And bro needs to refinance, and I hope he does. And if he doesn't, you're going to have to probably talk to a lawyer or something. I don't f***ing know. Yeah, but minimum through payment, we can help you with that if it comes down to that, because I want to make sure we can get you security. $848.31. What's your rent? $1,645. Okay. When's that term done? June of 2027. Moving to a cheaper, smaller place, which you totally can. Gas, electric, utilities, all that combined. For the house? Is $350. Phone bill? Is $196. But that's for five phones. I'll get you both course career certifications, by the way. A lot of people convert them into six-figure jobs. There's tax, there's trades, there's a lot of good things. Highly recommend course careers. And I'll get you on helium as well for 15 bucks a line once you pay off your phone. Vroom, vroom, drive, drive, gasoline. $40 a week. So. Okay. Yep. $120. $120. And, nope, $160. I was right for a second. Car insurance, how much? That is $96 a month. That's not bad. Necessary food, $300 just for yourself. TP fund, $150. Everything else you need to survive. Make up all that good stuff. Medical health care. Copays? Monthly paces? No, no copays. Anything a month? Medical health care? No. Okay, I'm going to put $100 in there. Going to start therapy. Is there a gym? No. Okay, subscriptions. I'll put $40 in there. How many pets you got? I have two. What are they? Ages, health? Dog, 12 years old, male. And cat, 8 years old. Okay, pet insurance for the cat, $50. How much for pet food, pet supplies, monthly basis? $50. I think you're going to be able to survive here, dude. If you just don't spend all your money on bullshit, which is really all you do. I mean, it's pretty close. It's pretty darn close. Listen, and the thing is, if you go through bankruptcy, you make it. Why not? Fresh start. Get yourself in a place that's more affordable, then go through bankruptcy. Have a fresh start. Make sure you control your spending before you do it, or else you'll be right back here. Because people that go through bankruptcy don't fix their spending. They end up here again. Right. So, over the next few months, what we're trying to do is get your spending under control, break your lease, get in a cheaper place, then go through bankruptcy. Because once you go through the bankruptcy, you're already in an apartment you can afford. You don't have to worry about applying to an apartment. So, we're doing that before bankruptcy. And then at that point, you will be able to. Um. Survive with hundreds of dollars left, and you'll get a fully funded emergency fund, and then we'll start catching up aggressively on retirement, because that needs to be a big goal right now. Yes. So, that's really the path. But the thing is, we have proof of Rose taking advantage of her mother. We have big proof of fair things going on, and a lot more that we didn't talk about that we're going to go into in the Financial Auto Post show. Let's get the Hammer Financial Score first. Technically, you have the house. What's the house worth? $150,000. Okay, that's an equity position. Hopefully, we can get you a little bit of cash to get. Get out of that. Yeah, $148,000 is what I'm seeing. So, that's really the only thing going for you, because you do. Well, no, you actually don't have collections, do you? Not that I saw. No. So, debt, 1 out of 10. And real estate, because it's going to be complicated, a bit weird, I'm going to give you a 5 out of 10 there. Other than that, you're 0 for retirement, 0 for emergency funds, 0 for spending in your budget. So, Hammer Financial Score rounded up to 1.5 out of 10. Get yours for free at calebhammer.com. Now, join us for what is. Guaranteed to be an incredible financial audit post show by joining Hammer Elite right here on YouTube or downloading the Hammer Elite app. Wherever you want to be, it's the same membership on both platforms. We've got three premium, high-quality shows every single day, six days a week. That's why there's over 175,000 monthly members. Come join us for the post show. It's incredible. See you there. Okay, so do we think bro abused? It's muddy because everyone's stories are different. Their mental abuse was, I didn't have friends growing up. I was going to have a phone. That's what I'm. What's the issue? I'm not going to let my kids have phones until 60. You know the word abuse is starting to mean nothing coming from you now. It really is. I mean, they. No, that wasn't abuse. You have lost all credibility as an accuser. Not a lot of evidence. I just launched the brand new Hammer Elite app available on every major platform. So you can watch every show anywhere you want. You'll get three exclusive dedicated shows every single day, Monday through Saturday. Refer a friend after you sign up and you get an additional 30 days of Hammer Elite access for free. Download the Hammer Elite app. By using the link in the description or pin comment down below. This is the best membership you'll ever join. And that's a promise. I'll see you next time. Bye. Results will vary. See experian.com for details.