Everybody Hates Belgium | The Beautiful Pod

(bell dinging) (bell dinging) - Hello and welcome to the beautiful pod. I'm Adam Friedland, your Chris Ryan. - Yeah. Has anyone said that to you, you are Chris Ryan. - I just realized you're wearing a blazer. Is that 'cause you're men and blazers official now? You're coded. - No, I was born to be, this is the first time you've looked at me since we started the show. I've worn a jacket, a nice dress for the job I want. I thought that it would start rubbing off on you and you could, you could, those hoodies. (laughs) (dramatic music) - How are we doing? How are we enjoying the cup? - Yeah, we're loving the cup. And the reason we're loving the cup is because the stars have come out. Like Cristiano Ronaldo and Lionel Messi and Killian Embape, your three favorites. - In my opinion, my three favorite players are Lionel Messi, Cristiano Ronaldo and Killian Embape. - In my opinion. - But I'm a hipster, okay? - Yeah. - We're gonna do a lightning roundup of the matches. We're gonna do some fucking amazing analysis. We have our gaffer segment. This one is gonna be really good today. And then at the end of the show, I'm gonna be joined with the Faws himself, Henry Winkler. (laughs) Ben Foster. - Ben Foster, okay. - Well, I'm gonna have to change a lot in my interview. - Ben Foster, and then we're gonna wrap it up. I was at Senegal Norway last night. The level, the level, I say. - You didn't like it. - You did not like the quality of play. - Well, I would say that, yes. I was there with two lovely Norwegian men. I don't wanna put it that way. Why would I put it that way? I was there with my two pals there in Norwegian. One new pal who's the Zoran of Norway, apparently. I'm collecting Zoran all over, yeah. Next week, I have a lunch with the Zoran of Israel. Okay. Jesus Christ, what am I doing? When the monster scores, I can't celebrate it. I was wearing their red thing with a cross, with a Christian cross. And I was there with them rooting against Africa. The royal family were in attendance. Apparently they have a scandal right now. - The royal family of Norway? - Yeah, Norway. What's the scandal going on with the royals there? - I guess the stepson did something not so bad. - He's a non-s, he non-s. - I don't know. - Okay, so they're becoming angler files. It might be the fact that Holland was born in England. It's really, they're really doing British stuff these days. - Yeah, I gotta say that Senegal were poor. I was really excited to see them. They started three-sixes and it was just incredibly, both, you could see both teams were trying to hit the other team on the break. - Yeah. - And then so it's like, well, we don't want possession, right? It was just like, the first 20 minutes were odd. It was kind of like, what did they say in boxing? Where they're feeling each other out. They're trying to find each other's distances. - They were feeling each other up. And yeah, that's actually the son of the Norwegian Prime Minister, I think you're talking about. - The son of the prime minister, not the king, non-s. - Stepson. Stepson. - Okay, we're gonna break this story later on with a member of Parliament and the Nathan Fielder of Norway, which apparently the government just gives you money. You can go to the government and be like, "I want to be the share of Norway." - Are you gonna start collecting Nathan Fielder's around the globe too? Is there a Nathan Fielder in Israel? - I don't know, that intimidates me to think of a Jewish guy that's better at comedy. No, but granted, yeah, it was, it was like, a herky jerky, we had a Mendy injury. My Sam, the producer was celebrating a little bit, so loudly, it's a man's life, okay? Sam, why would you cheer for that? - I don't know, I regretted it as soon as I did. - Yeah, yeah, thank you, Sam. - What was Matt Life like as a football arena? - I gotta say, I drove there 17 hours early and I went to the Norway fan section and I was like, it's gonna take forever to get back, and I took the train back instead of getting the ride that I got, and it was pretty convenient. I have to say, from Penn Station, there's a bus to the Sikakis, and then you take the 4 out of 5, and then you change to the 5 and the 10. - Yeah, this is really good content. Anyway, but no, I will say it wasn't as big a pain in the ass to get there as I had suspected. It's cool, it was the first ever World Cup match I'd ever been to, and it's really the anthems and the flags, I mean, it's sick. It's so sick. - Have you been to a match? - I haven't, I hope I get to go to one of the knockouts. I've been really jealous of all the footage from Philly because it seems like the countries are really showing out in Philly especially, and everybody's gathering on the Art Museum Steps, which is right down the street from where I grew up, so I wish I was there. - Oh, the Rocky Steps, yeah. - Yeah, is that like a thing in Philly where people are like just snobs about it? They're like, oh God, these tourists think that they're doing a thing from one of the coolest movie scenes ever. - Yeah, no, we suggest that they go running through Southwest Philly like Creed. - Do you throw coins at them, perhaps? - No, no, we don't throw batteries. - Just as an aside, I know this has nothing to do with soccer, but my friend said he went to a strip club in Germany, and like a euro is a coin, and I was like, (laughs) so they have to like, exchange them for paper currency because otherwise they'd be throwing coins at the strippers, which would be obviously terrible. - Holland is fucking amazing, and the press conference afterwards where they're like, you got France coming up and he's like, yeah, we're in smoke, they're gonna kill us, and they're like, they're the best, and they're probably gonna win the World Cup. It really made me like him. I was actively maybe a little bit the Oedogard experience chirping a little bit until that brilliant reverse pass. - Chirping what, were you chirping like, get out of my sight? - I was like, welcome to the experience boys. - Oh yeah. - I've had 55 matches of this, actually, he hasn't been available, but yeah. Apparently they're getting sick of him too, and then he had that brilliant reverse ball. Irland, our friend was like, this is going to be like the big Oedogard game, or whatever, in it. - Yeah, and we're like, no, it's not, dude. He stinks, and then he was pretty good, okay. - It's funny watching these guys get rejuvenated. This happened with me with McAllister on Argentina, where I was like, you shaved your head, you look like prime you. Clops down there on the field, dapping you up. - Yeah, because they're playing against the Kurds, and they're playing against the Canary Islands. I mean, that's why these guys that we get so frustrated with are playing against a Sunday league team from Blackpool, or some shit. I don't know, Blackpool's in 18 to the World Cup. - Blackpool is in the World Cup, right? - Gianni Infantino has expanded the field to include Blackpool. - Don't be great if random cities got to have their own World Cup team. - Apparently, Blackpool is, and I'm sorry if this offends anyone, the most shit place in England. Apparently, it's shit. I thought it, I don't know, at least they have a pool. Okay, we'll clean that up. Let's go through Lightning Round of Games. Morocco, Scotland, I don't really want to talk much about it other than, I want to introduce our gaffer's segment again. Let's do it. - Yeah, let's do it. Is Steve Clark on the hot seat? Okay. - So yes, and I also thought that this was an interesting example of how sometimes somebody who can be like a beloved cult figure then immediately turns into an incredibly annoying man, almost instantaneously, after not getting much mini goals. - Yeah. - Some kind of a side. As you said before, it's a new Steve Clark in this tournament. He's considering a 442 and letting them speak to their families. So he's really letting his hair down in this tournament. For those of you who don't know, Steve Clark is the manager of Scotland. He is a man who has never smiled. That is, he's actually, there is, in the Guinness Book of World Records, longest time without smiling. It's been his entire life. All right, let's keep moving. Brazil, Haiti, Vinnie, is he free of the dictator? Are we seeing Vinnie and Jude? Are we seeing these guys who are once just living for themselves, are we seeing them out of jail a bit? - I think they're playing in teams where their positions actually make sense. Whereas that last rail Madrid team was like 18 square pegs and round hold, holes or whatever. It's actually the coolest thing about this tournament so far is almost every star seems to have the perfect platform to perform from. It's like the team is built to get everything out of Vinnie and Jude or whoever. - Yeah, I think that is a great point. That is what's really dope about this. And I think we were mentioning this in the last episode. Everyone's that sick that we want to see cook. Now, including Ronaldo, who has, let's just check on it. - Six goals. - Oh no, Borat scored, two, one. - No way! - Oh, that's fucking-- - Get in! - As Aziz John Ganlev. Okay, I'm not, okay, Penaldo got to score the opener. So now all of my favorite players are playing really well. Paraguay Turkey, Chris, your Dark Horse Turkey. - I'm in Tattas. - Let's get into it and shambles. - How many shots through two games? I think it's like 58 shots. They've taken 58 shots. - Well, their XG would have been good then. - Who are they, Mads, Mikkelsen in that movie, another round? (laughing) Who are they? I thought that was Haram to take 58 shots. - They're going home, Montella's getting canned. This didn't work, sorry. I was by bad. - Yeah, Armenia is having a fucking cup right now, right? Turkey's in the mud, Iraq's in the mud. The Kurds are having a fucking cup right now. Although Iran, the Kurdish goalkeeper was a, or the Iranian goalkeeper was a Kurdish shepherd, which, he's amazing. - He's a wall, he's amazing. - He's incredible. This has been a no name keeper tournament. I think that is a great subplot. Eloy Rum from USL2's Miami FC. Which they have another one, what's it called? - Fort Lauderdale FC, I think. Look it up, it's Miami. Never disrespect me in front of Chris again. - Do you know what else is standing on his head was the Vazenia from Cape Verde? - He has five million followers now on Instagram, and apparently he's followed like 2,000 women. That is a true thing. (laughing) - Good for him, good for him. If that doesn't work, just like being a hero in public like that. How dare they, he's, yeah, he's dating, he's dating, he's in a love triangle right now with Pepe and Teyana Trump. Okay, I want to get to Pepe. Let's go real quick, Paraguay, Turkey, pathetic, just cancel the country. Listen, anyone who knows me knows I'm a big tie-up Erdogan guy, I love his supermarket in LA. I get all my sea mosses there. - Like your smoothies. - I get the Halle being very smoothie from Thai Erdogan's supermarket. Guys, this is, Ataturk just turns in his grave. Suleiman the magnificent literally would vomit and his boy consort would, this would make them sick. Honestly, a lot of their players do look like Suleiman the magnificent boy consort. If you, can we put that in the episode? (laughing) Can we make that joke? Can we make that joke? Who are you asking? Erdogan? - I don't know, Spotify. The joke that I'm pitching right now, and leave this in if this is funny, is that I want to say that what's his name from Real Madrid, Artigooler? - Artigooler looks like he would have been the boy consort. - Yeah, I see. - Suleiman the magnificent. - So it's sort of a jenga tower of a joke. If you can't make the first part, you can't make the second part, right? - Yeah, yeah. And honestly, shout out to the Ottomans. They were the only place that tolerated Jews after the Spanish Inquisition. Why does everything have to be Jew? Okay, Netherlands, Sweden, five, one. Brian Brobby, pre-term and shout of mine. - No big deal. - No, the boy, he looks like a RB-1. - Yeah. - He's got a little sequin neck in the neck, right? - And I miss strikers like this. I feel like, you know, this is sort of like usually get it in the lower third of the Premier League and then in the championship, but like the top six have kind of dropped dudes like this. Somebody should, somebody should sign this guy. Why are you, Arsenal should sign them. - Who's that hench guy that was like in league one? Like, you know what I'm talking about? Look at Buffman. - Look at him. - Look up the Buffman. Yeah, there was a-- - Akin' Fenwa. - Akin' Fenwa. - Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, if you like leveled him up in FIFA, you could like actually make him into a god. You could like have him like when you the Champions League. Where do you see this team going in this tournament? I think they are for real team. I think that we forgot how at the first two phases of play they are fucking stacked and then they have serviceable dogs up front. I mean, that is a formula for a World Cup success. - I'm unfamiliar with this version of Cody Gackbo. He has not played like this in A.T. Blunts for the Republic Phil's Lake. - Yeah, because he's playing against Sweden. We like Sweden. No, I like Grand Potter. But now he's going three-piece suit and he's trying to do a peaky blindness thing. - Oh, he did. - That's the problem. Just pull up the picture of him in the three-piece suit. - Listen, just pick a look. Pick a look and he's sucking his thumb like a baby. Okay, Jeremy Ivory Coast, this is what I want to talk about more. I enjoyed the hell out of this match. Ivory Coast, I think really impressed me despite losing. Obviously there was a terrible, terrible missed opportunity right at the end. - This is like, when you watch something like that, there's those little, little moments of like, I don't know what you want to call it, experience or class or whatever where it was just like, goddamn it. In fact, dude, just goes one time. They beat the Germans. - Yeah, the winning goal, heartbreak for Ivory Coast, the turn, so professional. I loved it. Who dished that in? Was it Kimmich? Who gave him the dish? - That was it, Flo? - It was Felix Namescha. - Yeah. - Obviously Felix Namescha's beautiful, brilliant, line-baking pass, who could forget it. I think Germany looked great, but like we're gonna get to France. Like do you think that they have enough firepower to knock them out? - Yeah, you know what was impressive about them? - Yes, I do think they have enough firepower to knock them out. And I do think that. - I do too. - But I thought that the Germany Ivory Coast game was indicative of how much depth matters. Ivory Coast didn't have that extra wave of talent coming off the bench like Germany did. - That's really what came across as depth. I mean, that's the top tier, like nations have, just you look at the bench and it's like city. Like when you, do you just remember playing those fucking fuckers, and then you just see Mares sitting there, they'd be like, you'd be like, they also have him, it's not fair. Yeah, they have like, I mean England, we said this when they made their substitution. Obviously England are playing later today. And we, I think we will find out the level. I think I think, I'm now, I convinced myself after the first England match that it's coming home. And now I've gone through the cycle where I'm like, I'm not sure, maybe they peaked, like maybe they had too much juice coming out of that first match and now they have to come back down to earth. - Well, yeah, and also they're on this like Vegas vacation style. They're at the Hoover Dam and yeah, they're getting like-- - Did you see Declan and the police officer doing yokoras out in the streets? - Yeah, why would he act like that's a guy that should be his teammate next year? Okay, Japan, Tunisia, Hervor Nara in the mud. I'm thinking, you fire him. I'm thinking he's out and I'm thinking Sir Alex Ferguson, one last job. - Would you take Tunisia for the last group stage match? Would you manage them? - I would, yes. Listen, I would sit down with the boys and listen, I know that it's obnoxious as a yank for me to speak in my-- if I was with the Tunisian national team, I would sit them down-- - Should I go over mine? - How do you sort of fuck them out here? - Yeah. - That's true. - Right, right, no deal, dude. - What sort of other game relationship with Declan, Declan, Malfoy? - No. - That would have been sick. - Malfoy having been gay and repressed is good. - Yeah. - Yeah, yeah. - We're not the run. - Why? - Declan's not bumping around that. - Yeah, he is. - He's a little bitch, you know, or something. - So yeah, I mean, that's the point. It's like, you, listen, Hervanard is coming in there. He's doing this, like, he's doing this, this fucking French, like Charles De Gaulle, or it's kind of like, I'm, like, this is Pads of Glory or something. He's yelling at these fucking poor guys. They've been through a lot, okay? They played their right back as the, he was the kid boy. They had their last, their last guy, their last manager, forgot everyone's position the day before the World Cup. I would sit them down and just talk to them about, do you think Ron would be bumping Draco, you know? - You just, like, relate to them. Try to, try to really just keep it real. Do you think Japan is actually a threat? - Japan is a real team and I love them. - Me too. - I love them. I love seeing them play Sam's Boy Sano, who's like on a early, what? Sam's list of boys. Why would you have a, why, come on? - It's like 25. - You kept, he's 25? - Yeah. - How old are you? - 26. - Okay, so yeah, that's inappropriate. It's not appropriate. There's a problematic age gap kind of situation there. I only rank men that are Ronaldo. [BLANK_AUDIO] the only one that's older than me, I think, okay. - Adam, you know how you're like Japan's a real team and a threat? - Yeah. - You know who's not a real team who I never fucking wanna watch play football ever again is Belgium. - I fucking hate them, they stink. And honestly, another Adam prediction, they are the worst, most terror. They're mad at Doku for wanting to see his child born. Swiss are pissing me off too in this tournament. Just choose a fucking language, okay? Like, what do you, what do you flammish? What do you, like, just, what do you waloon? Okay? Right, like, listen, they've been through a lot. They fought both world wars basically in Belgium. (laughing) - That's crazy. It's crazy to think that just like twice. They were like, I had a friend actually once where I was like, can you do like, he's a French guy. I was like, what does a Chinese accent sound like? - Oh my god. - Like, serial typical. He just sounded like French to me, right? And I was like, and he's like, what about African? And it just sounded like French. And I was like, you're not doing it. And he's like, and then he did Belgium. And he was like, what do we do, what do we do, what do we do? It was the only, it was the only one that I wouldn't be saving any performance. - Yeah, yeah, he's like, I could do a really good Belgium. And he's like, oh, what do we do, what do we do? They should block the border. - Yeah, and I was like, wow. These people have been through a ton. And if I was Doku, I would go back home to watch literally anyone give birth rather than play for Belgium. It doesn't even have to be my life. - I would, exactly. And it would be beautiful. (laughs) Okay, yeah, let's just say I'm, I just saw a joke that he wrote in the notes. So let's get your big Iran joke. Let's do it, Sam's Iran joke, I need a new manager. Just put it, can we get the image? Sam's trying out comedy. He's done writing his dossier on Burnley. - Yeah, okay, no, Christopher Molta-Santi. That was a really funny joke. Let's keep going, your wife, Cape Verne. What a match, what a team. Cape Verne, listen, they are not products of an experiment. Yes, they called them the Shaw, yeah. - Yeah. - Yeah. - Thought it was funny. - It's funny, yeah, he looks like the Shaw over in. Resa Polavi, you know, it was incredibly brutal. You know, I don't know about that, I just know about Phil. - Okay, you're a guy, Cape Verne. Cape Verne, I just want to say guys, like, if you think that there are like a product of an expanded field, they're not. They are a team that qualified at the top of their group. They would be in the World Cup, were it 64 teams, or what, not 64, how many fucking teams? - 32. - 32 teams, if it was a regular 32, Cape Verne would be in this tournament. And I love to fucking watch them play. - This is the Cinderella story of the tournament. They play their asses off. They've got a really good keeper, their fans are amazing. It's been like a deep pleasure to see these guys. - Yeah, and all of his DMing with Lisa Ann hasn't distracted from the heroic save. Marcelo Bielsa, Sam, you put this quote in here, "I'm a generator of tension "when I arrive the atmosphere becomes tense." And that's why I appear infrequently, I am toxic. Associating with me makes you worse, that's very funny. Honestly, that shout out to Sam on that. Like, what is he? Like, he's just like, he goes a hot topic. He like, where's invaders, Zim stuff? I'm toxic. - He hates being here. He hates this tournament. I don't think he very much likes this team. He seems miserable every time he's on camera. And this is one of my favorite managers ever. - Where's their next game? Can we rescue Marcelo Bielsa and make him just chill, live in our Hollywood Hills house with the Scottish guy? - Yeah, seriously. I think that's the fourth. - He could be turtle. - Yeah, no, he's a trauma. - He's like, yeah, he tell us about Viking quests. Tell us about his days with a Chilean national team. - Coach, I'd ask him about that. - Yeah, ask him about the guy that had the Jordan Jumpman next tattoo. Who's that guy? Oh, Gary Medell. - Oh, Gary Medell was the absolute pit bull. He was great. - Yeah, and they had our tour of Vidal. Ask him what that guy's deal is like. Does he actually think that that look was good? - Yeah, yeah, I guess he has to sit on this blue bucket, right? He says it's the best view. And honestly, if you're watching football, that's one of the worst views. I can understand being an offensive coordinator up high, seeing the formations, but Sam, okay, you just deleted. You got embarrassed? - Yeah, Sam had Sam Victory lap on Maxi Arahuo. Wait, did you say that on the show? - I saw a video of being also sitting with Arahu where he was like this guy's mediocre and I didn't pick him. He was given to me, but I couldn't tell if that was fake or not. - That's just how he talks. - Yeah, yeah, it is kind of how he talks. And that's why they miss him and leads. - This is how Adam goes about doing the show with me. He's like, I didn't pick this guy. - Yeah, no, you say that about me? - No, that's what you say about me, you know? - No, I would never say that about you. Well, listen, sometimes that arranged marriage can result in love that blossoms for 40 years. And we can announce our premier league podcast, The Beautiful Pod, Prem Pod. Yeah, which we are doing every single day throughout the rest of the transfer window, throughout the rest of the summer, five days a week. Here we go, we're gonna get Fabrizios. We're gonna be, listen, this is how I met your mother. Okay, guys, each of New Zealand don't really care. Your boy Moe had a moment. That's nice. - That was dope. He then party with the crowd out in the streets. It was awesome. - What was it like rooting for that guy on your team? - He's truly, he is a beautiful person. I love him. The problem was, I really want to get into Belgium. I forgot this, the problem is-- - The problem is, Turkey is infecting, yes. I want to go back to Belgium. Turkey is infecting the entire world of football because anytime when solid got the hair plugs, he started to suck. Can we agree? - You're starting to sound like Joey Barton who was saying that Kevin De Bruyne sucked 'cause of his veneers. - Yes, and I would like to play that clip and I think that there is something to this. And I think that Turkey is just infesting everyone with these teeth and these hair. - Arguably the best player in the Premier League, but got the teeth done, got the Terry teeth in for him big mad, quiff going on, animal. As is normal, when you get them teeth done for any young players out there who come into a few shillin, when you get your teeth done. All right, your body compensates for your mouth. You sleep, you run, your body compensates for your mouth. You get the teeth done. Soon as you get your teeth done, it realigns to your bite. Once you realign your bite, that starts to offset your spine and your spinal column and your spinal cord. And before you know it, a domino, like a domino is bip bip bip bip, chain reaction goes down your spine into your soft tissue before you know it. Body starts coming apart. Kevin De Bruyne's problem at Manchester City was getting his fucking teeth done. Every player I see get the teeth done. Within a short period of time, soft tissue injury starts out. It has nothing to do with Pep making them sprint for seven yards at a point, like 100,000 times. He's right. It's too bad he's a racist gumbag 'cause it would be funny to put him on the pit next season and have him just come in into people's emergency room stalls and be like, it's your fucking teeth. Can you imagine what it would be like to be fouled by him? Joey Barton? Yeah, it's just-- Like outside of a pub or on the football pitch? No, in front of everyone, like, it, I mean, not quite Duncan Ferguson, but, like, it would hurt. I'd be like, hey, man, come on. I know we're wearing different shirts, but, like, we're wearing different costumes, but you don't have to hurt me so much. Let's talk about Messi, Siempre Messi, Siempre Leo. Argentina, two, Austria, and Nile. Let's get to it real quick 'cause we-- and then we gotta go. The real question is, does the Miss penalty affect his legacy, I think? No. OK. I do feel like I've seen him-- is he a good penalty taker? No, he's a-- in fact, I've crunched the numbers. If you want to show the graphic, yes. Penaldo is at 84%. Messi is at 78%. Does this-- are we ignoring something? I'm trying, means, for all those better. Yeah, no, I think he does. It makes me rethink all of my priors. But perhaps there is someone else that needs to enter the Goat Conversation slide. Victor Giocares, 93% 40% for 43%. Did he take one against PSG? Yes. Any score? Buried it. He doesn't miss. Honestly, he is the worst striker in human history other than this one thing that he does the best in the world. He's incredible at penalties. The other best penalty taker I've ever seen the Anzley-Mateland Niles. I wish we had a clip of it. Listen, I don't care if we keep bringing it up. What we're seeing, the main thing we're going to remember about this World Cup, I mean, I don't think necessarily that Ronaldo's legacy is affected by this right now, either, right? But the main thing that we're going to remember about this World Cup is that beyond the winner, maybe even more than the winner, is that this is the end of these two people's stories, right? I'm going to talk to Ben Foster after this, but who's with him at United, everyone that plays with him says that he's a great teammate, for the most part. We don't know anything like most of these guys are friends, yeah. Yeah, not Bruno, but he would die for his guys, apparently before Ben Foster had a penalty shootout, he's like, this is your moment, like he g'd him up, like, but the thing is, it's like, does he, does Ronaldo realize that he could easily just come on at 75, give a 15-minute cameo every match and ride a very good team deep into this tournament and potentially have a shot at a World Cup? That is, that's my main question. He would also be a full-carrow if he did that. People would be like, this is incredible. If you turned into like late period Henrik Larsen or something, well, no, well, they disallowed fuck. They disallowed Borat's goal and Ronaldo has two, okay? I knew this was going to happen. We knew this was going to happen. Harry Kane's going to like, break his leg, England's going to go home, but Alton always going to go nuts. And Alton was going to get the group stage merchant is back in the group. He's playing Borat, yes, let's wrap it up here. I think let's, what were your takeaways from the messy goals? That Argentina is like now actually like a real like back-to-back threat for me. And that like the way that they're playing feels like incredibly connected and that they left goals on the table that match. So I'm like, I still feel like their best football is to come and they've been among the more impressive teams. The first goal was just Vintage. Honestly it was like the Kobe 60 point game, it was like our friend, we didn't think we'd see our friend again, but like he's doing it now, he's done it five times, like the rebound, the second goal from the first match was just like a vintage like the predatory like him knowing the future knowing where the ball would ricochet, the second goal yesterday was just like he's still so, he's not fast but he's quick, you know, and like he's still, it's so innate within him. Doesn't matter how fast he is if he's always in the right place. Is he still the best player in the world? He might be, he might be fucking is. I think honestly I watch it and I'm like, this is still the best player in the world. It's Shohei, but I guess Shohei pitches, he's the best, Messi is the best baseball player in the world. Let's get to Ben. That was a lightning round of games, Chris, we're looking forward to England today. And it's going to be a disaster. We know that, Sack is going to just, his Achilles is going to explode, and he's going to hit two free throws, and then he's going to take percusses and write a Facebook post, there's like god damn it. I'm so fucking pissed off right now. All right. Thanks a lot partner. See you. Roar. Roar. Bark more. Bark more. Ben Foster. Thank you for joining me. Absolutely. Pleasure. Yeah, yeah. He has no idea who I am. I am the foremost expert on footy in America, in fact, I'm the Ted Lasso of, well, I wouldn't say that. I'm actually funny. What's the name of the podcast? What is it? It's, I'm doing the World Cup coverage for the ringer, so I'm doing, yeah, so for Bill Simmons, so it's called a beautiful pod. Yeah. I'm Adam Franklin. I'm a comedian. I'll send you on some stuff before. I like it. You're like, oh, good comedian. He's good. I like it. Oh, yeah. I would say incredibly, which is brilliant, fascinating. Thanks for joining us. I know you have to get back because you're old mate from Old Trafford. He's doing the remontata right now. He scored two against Borat. People were right, and I must say, there you go. You can always go. People. You, his stauncher supporter, perhaps, may have said that he should get benched. I think after the last game, then he had a good chance of it to be fair, but I think the manager might have been a little bit, what's the word, strong arms. He doesn't get much say in it. He's playing regardless, all right? Yeah. What is the, what's the, what's the kind of the consensus on Roberto Martinez? He just wants to be like, what are you guys doing after the game? Like, do you guys want to hang out? I think he adds Ronaldo, great quads, great, yeah, great belts. Yeah, I think he's like that with Ronaldo, isn't he? I think Ronaldo does the team talk, to half time team talk, the water break team talks, and he tells Roberto Martinez where to stand as well. Yeah, Carlos Kuros takes training. So you obviously, you were in the World Cup in 2014. That was the, the Roy year, correct? Yes. Roy Hodgson, yeah. He's managed to do a couple of times, if I'm not mistaken. Three times, actually, West Brom, England, and Watson. What, what was he like, like, memories of Roy? He's like a bit of a granddad father figure. He's the loveliest man. Actually, you know what? He's lovely, but in a football setting, if somebody does or says or acts away, that's probably a bit unprofessional. Oh, my God. He's a filthy, filthy snappin' in, and he would give it to you, and he would not beat about the bush, and he would not hold his words, and he would be horrible, but he needed to. But I liked it as well. Did he ever, did he ever into you out, like, did you ever, were you ever a victim of the or a target? No, it's, it's usually somebody who was being a little bit unprofessional. So basically, he's just being sloppy, not working out enough. If he's doing a team talk, they were talking and mumbling. That was one of his big, pet peeves. If he was doing a bit of a team talk, if it was like on the side of who's mumbling? No, if, if, say, say if, say if the manager, say if Roy was doing a team talk, it could have been a side of a training pitch, it could have been in the changing, and you have a couple players sort of sat next to each other, just sort of mumbling away to each other, still talking. Oh, my God. Honestly, I just remember watching, I think, if he's going to go in a minute, he's going to go in a minute, and then all of a sudden he would turn and snap in front of the whole team, 30 men, and he would actually snap at them and give it to them. So I always knew not to do silly things, right? What's different about the England game now than what you remember 2014? You guys didn't qualify, is that correct? Yeah, we didn't qualify. We lost our first two group games against Italy and Uruguay, and then the final game against Costa Rica, we were already out, so it didn't really matter. But I'd say the difference now, this team, to what we had, we, I feel we've got one probably a better team as opposed to what the other nations have got. I think we played in an era where a lot of nations were top heavy, honestly, they were so good, real good teams, like Uruguay and I Lee, we had a group of Luis Suárez, we had a group of Uruguay, Italy, and Costa Rica. Costa Rica topped our group, Costa Rica won our group. We came bottom, so it was a World Cup full of big names and big hitters and big teams. Now, Italy isn't even in the World Cup. Italy's not even in the World Cup. The football landscape has probably changed a little bit to the fair, but we are one of the top nations now. So we go into, there's a lot of expectations in England, there always has been. We've always had, if we don't get past like the quarters or semis, then it's like the world has ended in England, honestly. So, nothing's changed really in that respect, but we are doing a lot better in tournaments. Now, I think our last three tournaments we've done, final, semifinal, final, so it's not bad to be fair, is it? Yeah. Yeah. You mentioned Italy, do you worry that they're in Ibiza right now chatting your birds? Because you guys have to, they have to be here playing football, yeah, and all the Italian guys, like, I don't know, Califiori might be picking up some, okay, anywhere. In England, they say churps and churps, and they do. Yeah. It means chatting to a bird, giving some risk to the girl, that's what the kids are like. That is. Everyone gets to be on holiday except for Harry Maguire, who's on holiday. He's in time, it's quite the other day, selling a Panini stick, I think. He's ready to go, he's got his kit with him, he's got his molded studs. No, you said at the beginning, you said that you know your football, you're like really big into your football. I've got, if you want, I could give you a load of English football sayings, if you want, and see if you know what they actually mean. I know, all them, probably, really, and around any of the ones I don't know, okay, continue, let's go. Do you want me to give you some? Yes. Okay. Then he's had a Reggie Blinker. Okay. So it's a stinker. Fuck. I'm like, that's right, sorry. Very good. You couldn't swear, you could f***ing cuss, you could swoo- Yeah, well it's- - That's a Cockney rhyme scheme, right? - Yeah, very, very good, very good. - You might try to play it, me. - Well done, well done. He's got a 50p head. - It means he's dead. - No. - No, he's red. - Friggy, Friggy, Friggy's got a 50p head. - I'll tell you, you know what I mean. - Wait, wait, wait, let me guess. - What? - That's cheating. - That's cheating. - He's half a, yeah, he's half a pound. - Sterling. - No, right, I'll tell you. Okay, so the 50p coin in England is kind of, it's like, what, like, octagon shaped or something? - Yeah. - And if you've got a 50p head, it means you're trying to head it there, but you headed it there. - Yeah. - You're trying to score, but it's gone over there. - 50p head. - You ever head like a, like a stop sign? - Yeah, like a stop sign, yeah. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - And what is the beams on toast? He's hit the beams on toast. He just, he hit the posts. - Yes, well done, well done. - Yeah. - Do you want me to keep going? - No, well, I have, I've hard hitting questions for you about, no, keep going. I mean, no, I mean, it's your guess. We could do, we could do anything. - Right. - If I said he couldn't trap a bag of cement, what would that mean? - That he's a, he's a, Harry McQuire. (laughs) - You know that the Arabic announcer that calls the like Virgil Ven McQuire. Like, look what McQuire, the guy just has it out for the guy on like, B in sports, like that. I kind of want to see if he's working the World Cup and just listen to 'cause we don't have Ray Hudson anymore, so it's kind of like, he was the always the best to listen to. Speaking of Hudson, you played, you were at Old Trafford famously with Cristiano Ronaldo. What you did by saying he should be benched is you motivated him. I think that's how, that was some, that was like old school very, the Aller Dicey interview. But, but, but, I guess what do you make of like, there's this story that I've watched for 20 years and now we're seeing it kind of, Ronaldo says he wants to play in the next World Cup where we're seeing this being the conclusion of it. We're seeing Leo be, perhaps, is he still the best player in the world? I mean, I ask myself that every, I ask myself that every time I see him play. It's, it's, it's insane. And then we're seeing Cristiano who granted to his credit, I was saying this earlier, he could just be coming on at 75, making cameos and then riding a very good team very deep into the tournament, right? And instead, he wants to be the main man. Like, what do you make of like, as some of the, that knows Cristiano Ronaldo and as praised as work ethic and, you know, and I think you liked him, he was a good bloke, good lad. Yeah, yeah, yeah, what do you, what do you make of the story of, you know, these two men right now, pause? Yeah, I like the, there's always obviously that, the conversation of who's best messy Ronaldo, but I think even in this World Cup here, you start to see like the real emergence of all the other big boys is very, very hard scoring goals for fun and I'm back by scoring goals for fun. I think if you're going to be the main striker for your nation, a big nation, top nation, you've got to be able to run around very, very hard for 95 or 100 minutes. You've got to be able to put a real shift in for your team. And I think that's probably just the bit that's missing a little bit from Ronaldo. Now he's not going to be the type. He's never really has really, but he's not going to be the type to chase back and defend and help his other team make. But in fact, it's going to be scored two today against Uzbekistan, so Ronaldo's back, baby. They'll score your goals. I guess like the question is, is like from knowing Ronaldo, like do you think, maybe I'm speculating here, because obviously people think they know these guys. Messi seems to be a guy that just like hanging out with his family. Cristiano Ronaldo seems like a, like they've clearly motivated one another to achieve the greatness. That's why we're also lucky to have watched this. But like do you think that there-- I mean, one thing that I have floating around in my mind is like, is there a fear in him of what comes after the one thing you do your whole life, which is banging it in the back of the net, you know? And granted, can you relate to that as someone that, you know, let it into the back of the net? I'm sorry. Why did I say that? It's rude of me. I don't feel like that. How dare you, because I'd say Ronaldo's a slightly different character to a lot of people. Yeah, he very much has dedicated his whole life and his craft to his craft, sorry, to be in the utmost professional 3% body fat. And a lot of people just aren't built like that. I couldn't think of anything worse to try to be 2% body fat. You won't be able to have a beer. You can't have a burger, you can't. We went to a Chinese place for crispy duck last night. And it was phenomenal. Do you know what I mean? Like, he doesn't do that. He doesn't get to enjoy those little luxuries of life. But he does get tested in the picture of the duck. I put it on my Instagram. He can follow me and have a look at the stories if he wants. Yeah. But he could text it to Ronaldo. Do you have his number also? I don't have Ronaldo's number now. No, I was just good. I think if I followed him as well, I don't think he'd see it. I think he'd get lost amongst his. I mean, he is the most famous person in the world. Also half a billion Instagram followers, isn't it, isn't it? Yeah. I think it is. But continue. So his life is regimented in this way. Do you think that there's a consideration in him that what do I do after this shit? I don't think Messi knows that he's going to retire. I think Messi is just like, I'm going to my job and just like, I have to score the goals. He hates talking about being the best ever. Yeah. And it's nice that he got a world cup at the last one because he's so relaxed now. And the press conference is Messi's like, I'm fucking tired, you know what I'm saying? But yeah. I mean, what do you make of like knowing Cristiano is seeing that process and like, just speculating like, where is his head at right now? Yeah, what's he going to do after football, Jimmy? I'd say he's probably-- Yeah. Or do you think he's afraid? Yeah, maybe. Maybe. You know what? It'd be really good if somebody could ask him and get an honest answer. I don't think you would ever get an honest answer. Give you the top line professional answer, whatever he wants to hear. Whereas, if you ask that to Messi, you'd be like, maybe like, I don't know, I've really thought about it to be honest with you. You know, he loves his family. And even when that day does come, he'll be absolutely fine because he's got that support network around him. He's got his family, he's got his friends. Yeah. And it seems like that is the most important thing in his world. Ronaldo, still, I'd say he's a very good sort of father, I think he's always seen as Instagram for his family. I obviously love his family an awful lot. But he dedicates to, I'd say, a lot more of his time to perfecting his craft and being the best he possibly can be for as long as he can be. Question for you, when you were at United, Rooney obviously came after Ronaldo was there, right? Yeah. No, that was at the same time, yeah, but yeah. But yeah, Rooney came from Everton, I think, a year or two after Ronaldo came in 2004. Yeah. Yeah. And was there, was that like, did they, was that a precursor to the messy Ronaldo thing? Like, obviously, we all remember the wink in the World Cup, you know, like, how did, did that, did Fergie just like, like, put that out immediately, like, how, did that bleed into the culture of the locker room with those two men, like, competitive with one another or? Yeah, that's the way, Rooney is, Rooney is like a different beast to any of these guys. Rooney has got the nastiest side of football to him ever. The reason why Rooney was so good at football was because he was a filthy winner, like a filthy dirty, nasty winner where everything, everything he, he did was aggressive based, but he was an incredible footballer to boot with it. He wouldn't have been as good as a footballer if he didn't have the aggression, but he did. And it was the best I've ever seen. He would always be one of the first people I wanted on my team because, oh, mate, you'd follow Rooney into war seriously. He was a sicker, absolute sicker. The other players have probably made more natural ability, but Rooney, my goodness. But again, that's it in an era, like, you're talking, what, 20, 2005, fourth mate, like, the nation's then, back then, you think about some of those Brazil teams and Italian teams and French teams, they're Dan and Ronaldinho and Ronaldo and proper big boys, proper big names in World Football. That was probably before, like, the Ronaldo and messy thing really took fire, didn't it? But having two young, like, star boys, like, both on the come up with their, like, paternalistic character, like, Fergie, like, did, were there bus stops? Like, they were, you know, like, did Fergie, how did he keep that under control? Mate, it wasn't even a thing. It wasn't even a question back then. I think it was easier back then to try and control players like that, but Fergie was the boss of everything. So it's not like he had to try and step in and put fires out. He had the changing room already set. They knew where everybody stood and nobody would get too big for their station, but because that's surrounded by massive personalities as well, you know, when you're surrounded by Rio Ferdinand and Gary Neville and Roy Keane, proper big, like, real strong men, none of them would have stood a chance of trying to, like, get above their station, do you know what I mean? You've got no chance. Yeah, I mean, if Roy was there, I wouldn't try to go ahead and look at that. Yeah, my older brother is there. He's gonna beat my ass if I do anything. Question for you, you're an English supporter, but you saw the retake in the first match. Did that hurt as a keeper? And also, what the fuck are you supposed to do if they're stutter stepping? Like it's, honestly, I support England 'cause we have five Arsenal players there. You know, like we're getting, we're English, we're English. It's amazing. Lord Venger would be turning in his grain. As a keeper, were you like, come on, that's bullshit? Or are you like, oh yeah, come on, we hear we go again, Harry, let's go. That's clearly a great retake. I don't always bank on Hurricane score in a penalty as well, but it's just like, you saw it in the Champions League final with the penalties that they missed. The players that missed it doing that silly stuttering, step up kind of waiting for the goalkeeper. And I think you've got to be some player to be able to execute that because if the goal calls your bluff and he just stands there and waits for you. You haven't got any pace with your run up to be able to really put it into the corner and really get some pace on the ball. So you can really wait and just, if as long as you go the right way, you're saving it. Leo Messi yesterday did the same thing, didn't he? Horrific penalty. I'm thinking, what are you doing? That's the best player in the world. And it's been proven that you shouldn't be stuttering up to penalties, just run up. Well, it is ad as you can. And even if the goalie goes the right way, it's got a very small chance of saving it. Unless you're Ainslie, Madeleine Niles, who somehow, I don't know, have you seen his, how he does it? Yeah, he just, he's like, it's like that game where you're like, with a girl at Summer Camp, you're like, stop me when my finger gets here and you're like going like this. And like, yeah, the keeper's just like, just fucking kick the shit, kick the fucking ball. And he's like, yeah, whatever. I mean, what is your mindset? You guys are weird, are keepers strange? No, we're the good ones. We're the good ones. We're, we're, I mean, you're getting just fucking 100 mile an hour, like, missiles fired at you. You have to be a little bit crazy, you know? Yeah, we're the good ones. I promise you we are. The like, like, so in a soccer team, a hate saying soccer, it sounds so shit. Yeah, in a football team, right? You have the goalies at the back who are the good ones. Honestly, we're cool, we're down to work, we can talk, we've got good personalities, approachable. And then you go, you defenders just in front and then defenders are normally good guys, like nice guys down to work, no egos. And then you get into midfield and they start to become a little bit of a ballend. They start to be a little bit like ego. And then you get to the front lines. The ones at the top, the strikers, Jesus, egos are out of control, honestly. They are massive time, yeah. They go to Saudi for a billion dollars to do push ups. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, I guess the last point as an Arsenal supporter, we loved Rambo, top lad, great guy. Do you feel like a little bit like in that podcast, you were like a little bit like, don't, don't, just stop saying it, just saying you pay attention the whole time, just saying you pay attention. To concentrate on the game of football for 90 minutes, I'm finished, I can't do it. No, because I know what that's like. I'm exactly the same as that, Rambo. Rambo's very similar to myself as a goalkeeper as a personality. It's what they call it nowadays. Everybody seems to have ADHD or something anyway. And I can't sit still. I can't. I love my own company, but I have to be doing something. So I make sure I'm running or cycling or something in the gym. I can't sit still. And that's what it's like in a football match because you get bored. You're just watching the game and you get bored. So you either have to sing or you have to commentate yourself or you have to talk your way through the game so that you stay in the game because it is boring sometimes to just stand there and watch. Yeah, just final question. Who are the most ruthless fans in any state when you play that like to you? Because the other thing about the keeper is that you're a stationary. So you have the, you have the, you have the geezer is just going, having a go at you at the entire match. What's the worst thing you've ever heard? So I had, like, when I used to play for West Brum, I, I tried to have a wall of Hampton, wondrous. And some of the things the walls fans used to say to me were absolutely rank double. What does it say? I'm, no, I'm talking about like diet. I hope your dog died faster because I put an Instagram picture on me. I hope you're fucking dog dies faster. I'm like, you bastard me. You're an actually bastard. I was there because you've got this secret that you haven't done. You're fucking dog dies faster. And I'm like, you're a squat. Like, so they could say anything that they'd be saying stuff about my family, my wife, my kids, my, this and that. But as soon as they said something about my dog, honestly, I was like, you're a dickhead. You're an absolute dickhead. (laughing) Oh, man. Yeah, I wonder if like it'd be like, having a, being a psycho enough guy to have a dossier on the keeper, like his entire personal life, no, who his sister's having sex with. I mean, you could really get in into their heads. Ben Foster, it's been great. Let's, thank you so much. It's a pleasure, as always. Thanks for having me on. Appreciate it. All right, peace. Bye.